#Real life stuff

[sebadztian]

I'm going to say it here.

I exclusively ship Sebaciel.

I don't ship Sebas or Ciel with others because I think Sebastian is so focused on Ciel, he wouldn't even notice other people (something like how Edward only sees Lizzy) and I don't think Ciel can be with anyone else. To be with one's partner is to share yourself with them, and given the many, many secrets that Ciel has and his personality, I don't think he can ever be with someone else other than Sebastian.

Do I read any fic where they're paired with someone else (Sebard, Sebagni, Cielizzy, Cielois)? Rarely, but yes, I do.

But what I'm not going to read is Sebas/Reader or Ciel/Reader. I've never liked self-shipping in any fandom.

Self-shipping is not my thing and it's okay. What's NOT okay is for me to go around and harass/insult those who are into self-shipping just because I'm not into it.

I don't like vegetables. I avoid eating them as much as I can. But when I'm at the restaurant, I don't go to other tables and insult everyone who's having a salad, lecture them on how vegetables are bad and bitter, or thump them over the head with a chicken drumstick. I eat my vegetable-less meal and enjoy my food my way.

It's pretty much the same with fandom.

You don't like Sebaciel (the 'vegetables') and you avoid consuming it as much as you can. When you go to AO3/Tumblr (the 'restaurant') you don't go to other people's page/works (the 'other tables') and insult their works/opinions (their 'salad'), lecture them on how Sebaciel is bad/'morally wrong' (how 'vegetables are bad/bitter'), or harrass them (thumping them over the head with a chicken drumstick). You consume your own preferred media (your 'vegetable-less meal') and enjoy it your way.

It's as simple as that.

Pease don't try to convince me how vegetables are good and not bitter. I do eat certain vegetables (like how I occasionally read Sebas/others or Ciel/others stories), but I dislike most vegetables, like 90% of them.

#fandom discourse #shipping discourse #shipping discussion #sebaciel #real life stuff

[your-fave-is-just-a-lil-guy]

all sea life ever.

All sea life ever from real life is just little guys!

#there are many benefits to it :) #sea #marine biology #ocean #your fave is #submission #real life stuff

[valiantstarlights]

Regarding the continued production of season 2 of The Sandman despite the ongoing writer's strike:

I support the writer's strike, obviously, and I can't believe it's still ongoing.

Honestly, Netflix could have just given the writers their due?? It's not too much to ask, and The Sandman wouldn't even be a thing if it weren't for Mr. Gaiman, who is a writer, and who supports the strike???

If Hob can wait for Dream for 99 years and 364 days, with his record being at 133 years, then guess what that says about us as a fandom 🤷‍♀️

If season 2 sucks, then we all know the people responsible. (Hint: not the writers.)

#babes it's too early (in my timezone) for this #but yeah these are my thoughts about it #the sandman #neil gaiman #real life stuff

[soundbluster]

I've been looking for some new music to listen to for months, and finally came across Ghost.

(Thanks to the You Tube Algorithm actually doing it's job well for once!)

I wouldn't have thought gothic heavy metal would really be for me (particlarly as the song names are a bit offputting), but wow I'm loving it. Been listening to their music on loop for a three weeks now XD

It's great to discover you actually like something you'd previously ignored!

#not transformers #music #real life stuff #heavy metal

[bodhrancomedy]

I’m officially at a point where I’m not famous by any metric, but my face has been spread across the internet enough that sometimes people stop me when I’m out and about to point at me and say at various different volumes, “I KNOW YOUR FACE 😡.”

They usually can’t remember where they’ve seen me, so I’m half tempted to just start making things up.

But I don’t. Because I am a pushover.

#deaf #tiktok #queer #funny #real life stuff

[jtl-fics]

NOT TO LIKE BE A TOTAL BORING ADULT BUT I JUST GOT VERBAL CONFIRMATION THAT MY OFFER ON A CONDO WAS ACCEPTED AND I AM SO EXCITEEEED

#Bring out the dancing lobsters boys #Ash got a condo #I will never have to learn how a lawn mower works #OR a snow blower #But I will have a screened in porch and am allowed 2 WHOLE CATS. #I think the editor only counts as like .5 #Real life stuff

[a-small-writer-in-a-big-world]

One of the most heartbreaking things that I witnessed was when my dad was trying to show me a magic trick his older brother used to do for him only to not remember it and then he said “I wish I could ask him” just a couple months after he had passed

#I was thinking of a stupid little Drabble with the 141 #and then remembered this #it’s actually awful #how horrible death truly is #real life stuff

[stereax]

#beat reporter stereax #new jersey #real life stuff #earthquake

[the-lincyclopedia]

Some thoughts on cleaning

As an adult, I’ve never really known how to figure out what kind of cleaning I needed to be doing, and the advice that’s out there on the internet has never been very helpful to me. It feels like most of the advice I’ve seen has had one of two assumptions: 1.) your space is extremely messy (in a somewhat specific way), or 2.) you care a lot about having a clean home and are willing and able to invest a lot of time and energy into making that a reality (in an even more specific way). 

Neither of these assumptions really fits me. I’m not the sort of person to leave mugs all over my apartment, keep lots of dirty dishes in the sink, or have piles of laundry lying around, and I never have been, so a lot of the advice aimed at mentally ill/disabled people hasn’t been helpful or resonant, even though I am mentally ill and disabled. But I also have never been the sort of person to vacuum, dust, etc. on a regular basis, nor have I felt like I’ve had the energy for that. I’m somewhere in the middle, falling through the cracks between the two prevalent types of advice. 

And then this week, for the first time in years, I cleaned my apartment somewhat thoroughly. I didn’t do everything, but I did a lot. And I’ve been stunned in the past few days to realize how good it feels to live in a space that’s cleaner and less cluttered. It honestly feels amazing. I’ve loved my apartment for most of the time that I’ve lived here, but this is on a different level. So here are some thoughts about how you can maybe get a taste of this too. 

You get to decide what your goal is. Do you want to vacuum? Do you want to go through the piles of papers sitting on every flat surface that have been accumulating for months or years? Do you want to throw out the broken stuff that you’ve replaced but haven’t gotten rid of? Do you want to recycle the boxes you’ve been compulsively hoarding? You don’t have to want a picture-perfect living space. You don’t have to shoot for the sort of house or apartment you’d see in a cleaning-supply commercial. (In fact, that’s probably aiming too high.) You don’t have to do what you’re “supposed” to do. You get to pick what “clean” looks like to you. You get to pick what will make the biggest difference for you. (Obviously, if you share a living space, you probably need to negotiate these things. But in spaces that are yours, this is your call, and even in shared spaces, it can still be worth questioning received notions of cleanliness.)

Start with something achievable. Vacuum one room, or sort through one stack of papers, or fill one bag of trash, or break down one box. If you complete that task, or even if you get halfway through it and then stop, great! Your space is cleaner than it was before! Every increment counts. 

If you finish your first goal and still have energy, keep going. Ride that momentum as far as it’ll take you. It’s often easier to keep doing something than to start doing it, so if you can continue cleaning (and “can” here means that it’s both physically and mentally possible), then continue cleaning! You may find it easier to maintain momentum if you don’t sit down or take breaks, but also, if sitting or breaks are good disability accommodations for you, then use them.

Make it easier on yourself. If vacuums are distressingly loud for you, try earplugs or noise-canceling headphones. If rewards help keep you motivated, give yourself a treat when you finish, or even midway through! If you’re doing a cleaning task that can be done while listening to music or calling a friend, do that if you want. There is no virtue in misery, and in fact the best thing you can do is make cleaning not suck so that you can do it again sometime. 

I hope this helps someone. I don’t think there are any universal rules about this stuff, especially in the specific, but I do think that picking a goal that’s meaningful to you, starting small, riding momentum when possible, accommodating your needs, and trying to find ways to reward yourself for cleaning are probably good ideas in most circumstances. Here’s wishing you the energy to clean!

#a lin original #adulthood #cleaning #real life stuff

[sebadztian]

I rarely get myself invovlved in fandom/shipping discourse, but please allow me to put in my two cents in this whole "A guide for new Kuro fans" drama by sharing my own personal experience.

When I first watched Kuro, I wasn't into Sebaciel. I didn't see them as father-son, but I didn't see their appeal as a unit either, if you know what I mean. I was just watching this new anime without shipping anyone with anyone else (no, not even Cielizzy).

The only reason why I watched Kuro was because of the plot (yes, really). I like the idea of Ciel being the Watchdog and how he behaves like a detective, solving these cases (Azzurro, Jack the Ripper, and even the demon hound anime arc).

I managed to stay 'neutral' for the entire season 1 & 2, believe it or not (totally has nothing to do with how I'd watched them all within 3 days. It was during COVID lockdown, ok? I had nothing else to do!).

Of course, as a fanfic avid reader, I'd gone to AO3 to check out some fanfics and to my surprise, there were a ton of Sebaciel fanfics out there (I wasn't into anime at all and I wasn't aware that Kuro, let alone Sebaciel actually exist).

Since I wasn't into it, I didn't read any of those fics. I looked for the neutral ones because I just wanted to read about how Ciel solved various cases. Unfortunately for me, not many of those existed.

I started looking for more Kuro anime and found the BoC, BoM, and BotA online. Tbh, I was very, very confused. S2 was confusing enough and now this? Naturally, the next thing I did was to do some research about what's going on and that was when I found out that most of the anime aren't canon.

Then I started reading the manga.

In the beginning, I still had the same mindset, that I was just here for the plot. I can't remember exactly what has changed my mind, but then I gave those Sebaciel fics a try and that was when I started shipping them, because I was curious about why people ship them.

I started slow, but as I read those amazing stories and equally engaging manga, I started to see the appeal of Sebaciel and before I knew it, I become a shipper.

I'll say this, there's no way not to ship them if you read the manga. The entire series is built upon their relatinship and the development of their characters, both individually and together as a unit.

You can see this 'unit' as romantic, erotic, mentorship, even business partnership, or other. It really is up to you because your upbringing, your environment, your own characters, etc, might make you look at something in a certain ways.

But please remember that they're just FICTIONAL characters and they remain as such. As invested as you are in the story or the plot, this is just that, a story. Reading it doesn't make you a/an *insert insulting terms for Sebaciel shippers*.

So, in conclusion, for the new Kuro watchers/enjoyers, there is only one rule to watch Kuro: There's no right or wrong way/reason to watch Kuro, but kindly please do not harrass others whose opinions don't align with yours. Everyone has their own life story and it's not within anyone's rights to judge others for what they ship/don't ship. Please respect that and don't be an ass about it.

That's it. Other than that, read, watch, and enjoy the series (or any other series) in whatever way you want.

#sebaciel #kuroshitsuji #black butler #real life stuff #fandom discourse

[your-fave-is-just-a-lil-guy]

WILL WOOD FROM WILL WOOD AND THE TAPEWORMS!!!!!!

Will Wood from real life is just a little guy!

#YESSS SO TRUE #littlest guy ever fundamentally changed my brain chemistry #gods. i am IN love with him <33 #will wood #will wood and the tapeworms #wwattw #real life stuff #your fave is #submission #op personally agrees #q

[valiantstarlights]

Ferdinand Kingsley's IG story today (July 14) and an article by screenrant posted on July 4; the highlighted part is mine

#i'm not okay actually #manifesting season 2 dreamling content 😭🙏 #maybe even some hobrinthian and corintheus and hobrintheus content 😏 #ferdinand kingsley #hob gadling #boyd holbrook #the corinthian #the sandman #sorry if this is already common knowledge 👀 i filtered spoiler tags a while back so i have no idea what's going on #writer stuff #real life stuff

[quibbs126]

By the way I’m old now (aka today’s my 20th birthday)

#I don’t like the idea of being 20 #that’s like an actual adult #I mean yeah I’ve legally been one for 2 years #but now it’s official #*sigh* #don’t really have plans for it #other than maybe buy me a slice of cake #and possibly Tears of the Kingdom #we’ll see #real life stuff #birthday #random stuff

[soundbluster]

My cat "helping" while I rearrange my transformers collection/display.

#cat #my cat #transformers #toys #toy collecting ramblings #my toy collection #my toys #real life stuff #pets #cats doing cat things #toy collection #toy photography #transformers toys #maccadam #arcee #arcee toy

[a-student-out-of-time]

//Hey everyone, Mod Bubbles here.

//I come to you today with some more real talk, the product of which is kinda heavy but also really important, especially for this time of year. It's about mental health, bad relationships, and toxicity, so if you'd rather skip it, I understand.

//But I wanna talk about this because it concerns a piece of media Timeline Anon brought to my attention, which has been going around lately (at the time of this writing) with a really damaging message. I wanna make it clear why it's wrong and you shouldn't pay it any heed.

//This one goes out to everyone with rejection sensitivity and fears about how others perceive them. You guys are actually cool.

//The media in question is a controversial comic called "Communication is Key", which...I mean, I frankly don't want to get into anything about who wrote it or why, I just want to focus on what the comic itself is about.

//It's one of those simplistic comics that's supposed to teach a life lesson. In this case, Green and Red are having a discussion about Red's behavior and how they've been avoiding Green because they're concerned about their friendship, worrying that they're coming off as clingy or annoying, so they haven't brought it up. Green points out that they've had this conversation before and that just because they've had interactions like that in the past doesn't mean Green would act like that.

//...And then Green leaves, saying they can't be friends with Red anymore. Green says, after having this conversations over and over, they can't be bothered to deal with this "toxic" behavior and the lesson is supposed to be that some people are too much to deal with and it's not your responsibility to change them.

//Twitter proceeded to rip into the comic's horrible presentation and message. And for once, I completely agree with that. I'm gonna count the ways in which this comic is awful.

Green and Red don't even feel like friends here. It doesn't showcase any kindness or empathy, no believable humanity and nothing about why they even became friends in the first place. It just showcases Green's resentment with Red's problems and then expects us to side with them because it causes Green issues.

Red's "toxicity" instead feels like serious rejection sensitivity, social anxiety, intrusive thoughts, depression or some other serious mental health problem. That isn't a toxic behavior, it's a problem that requires understanding and empathy.

If someone is avoiding you because they're worried you find them annoying/clingy/toxic, the proper response to ask why they feel that way and not assume it's an intrinsic part of their nature. Nobody WANTS to have these problems, nobody asked for them to happen and nobody wants to have their friends leave them. Sometimes it's just a case of showing them empathy.

If you are this person and someone responds to your concerns about being annoying/clingy/toxic by saying "Yeah, you're right," and then leaving, you are better off without them in your life. They are the toxic jerk, not you.

While the idea of "you are not responsible for someone else's happiness" is correct, Green here has taken it to mean that you bear no responsibility for helping people you consider friends with anything. That is the epitome of toxic behavior, being a fair weather friend who's only around when things are easy and peaceing out when things get tough. Friendship is a two-way street and the people involved both should work to maintain it; having only one maintain it and the other benefits while giving nothing in return isn't friendship. That's more like parasitism.

Green's position is that Red should be the one to communicate, but at no point does Green suggest any alternative solutions like therapy, offer suggestions about Red changing their behavior on their own terms, or even offer sympathy for falling back into bad habits. No, Green simply cuts them off because it's too much for them to deal with, which is not only incredibly selfish, it's one of the most damaging things you could do to someone with rejection sensitivity.

People with these problems who avoid you or try to cut off their relationships out of nowhere are not being toxic, seeking approval or trying to manipulate you. They're often experiencing real fear and real concerns about how you view them, and so may be avoiding you because it's the only way they feel they can maintain a sense of control over their lives. It's unheathy, but that's why it's better to approach the situation with sympathy and compassion, rather than immediately assuming they have bad intentions.

Toxic people are far easier to read than you may think. They make everything about themselves, put your desires and your concerns down, exploit your friendship for their personal gain, constantly try to guilt-trip you and make you feel like you're the one at fault, never take any responsibility for what they do and how it hurts you, and then cut you off when you're no longer useful or easy to exploit. In other words, exactly like Green.

Mental health problems do not make you toxic or a bad person. People with those problems are more often than not the victims of toxic and abusive behavior, not the perpetrators. Mental illness gets used FAR too casually to refer to behaviors people don't like or find strange, rather than what they actually are: problems that some people have that do not define their entire character. They're people in just as much need of compassion and sympathy as everyone else.

I really don't know what else to say about this comic's terrible message other than that you should care about other human beings as more than just resources. They're people just like you, with their own lives, dreams, hopes, wishes, desires, fears, concerns, weaknesses and flaws. If you wouldn't want someone to treat you horribly, you really shouldn't do the same to someone else. That's something you should've learned in kindergarten.

//This comic's message is supposed to be that it's better for Green to cut toxic people out of their life, and instead the message people took away from it was that Red needs better friends. They are correct in that assessment.

//I have friends who used to act exactly like Red does, and contrary to what the author thinks, they can change and they can unlearn their unhealthy behaviors. It takes kindness, compassion, persistence and understanding, not to mention reinforcing all the good times you have with them and emphasizing those over pointing out how their problems make your life harder.

//I promise you, whatever problems someone else's mental health issues might cause you, the problems it causes them are far worse. Abandoning someone who's afraid of abandonment is not only cruel and hurtful, it will make their problems even harder to deal with by reinforcing everything they were afraid of.

//I sincerely hope the creator of that comic grows up and learns the importance of compassion over selfishness.

//And to everyone who struggles with these issues, I promise you, people like this don't deserve to be a part of your life and nothing they say about you is right. You are worth so much more than that and you do deserve to have good things in your lives.

//The people worth having around are the ones who acknowledge your flaws while emphasizing your strengths. They're the people who want to help you grow out of your issues and be a better version of yourself. And if you have the misfortune of encountering people who cut you off like Green, you can at least try and take the lesson of what to look out for in toxic people to heart.

//People are kinder and more understanding than they're given credit for, and you can and should be that kind of person for yourself too. Show yourself compassion when you need it and understand where you might've gone wrong, rather than constantly punishing yourself for every mistake. It's better for everyone, especially yourself.

//Things have been hard for me this year, but I've had a lot of great friends who've helped get me through it and I wish the same for everyone reading this.

//Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, everyone ^^

#mod talks #a student out of time #real talk #real life stuff

[doodlesdreaming]

Apparently, there was an ecplise this morning, and I didn't know until the near tail end of it. I could only see it through the lens flare, but I thought it looked pretty cool.

#solar eclipse #eclipse #photo set #photography #nature #real life stuff #dreamer speaks