#all I'm saying is if you see someone struggling with mental health issues fucking say something quit acting like thats a bad thing

[uncle-fruity]

HEY! HEY, YOU! YEAH! YOU!

Have you ever heard the phrase, "Your friends aren't your therapists"?

If you've been on the internet enough, I think it's a sentiment that's pretty difficult to miss.

But you know what that means, right?

It's meant to warn people not to place too much personal baggage onto their friends when they should be unpacking it with a professional. It's to say that venting to your friends shouldn't be your main source of coping. That is to say: most of your friends are probably unqualified to untangle complex emotional & mental health problems, and if you expect them to endlessly listen to your problems & have them help "fix" you, then that's usually going to end up in stress and tension in your relationship (or worse).

Do you know what "Your friends aren't your therapists" DOESN'T mean?

It DOESN'T mean that you shouldn't ever seek any emotional support from your friends or that you should keep all your problems to yourself.

Yes, it's important to establish boundaries in all your relationships. If there's something you'd rather not hear from your friends (and vice versa) that should be talked about if it ever becomes relevant. If your friend is easily overwhelmed by a lot of emotion/stimulus, then you shouldn't dump serious emotional things without checking in to see if it's okay first. Over time, in a healthy communicative relationship, you get a feel for what's okay and what's not.

But goodness fucking me when I see folks say that they don't deserve to express their harder emotions because "friends aren't your therapists" I just... I mean woof y'all!

What kind of friend is a friend that doesn't care if you're upset? What kind of friend sees you struggling with something and tells you to deal with your own problems because they don't owe you anything? What kind of friend comes around only if you hide your pain at all times?

A fair-weather friend, that's what kind. A friend that's only around for the good times, and goes away during (metaphorical) storms.

If someone only wants to be a fair-weather friend, that's their prerogative. But I'm telling you all that you deserve the kind of friendship where your friends actually give a fuck about you. You deserve to take up space sometimes. You deserve to get heavy things off your chest with someone you love and trust.

If you want better, stronger, healthier friendships, it's important to understand that intimacy is about Knowing and Seeing and Experiencing someone authentically. Taking off whatever mask we wear to get through the world and being ourselves and sharing that with another person. Anger, pain, grief... tackling these issues with each other builds trust and intimacy and makes everyone involved feel more important & needed & cared about. Isn't that what all this is for?

Anyway, this is all to say: be open about your emotions. Communicate with your friends (& tbh in all your relationships). Learn each other's boundaries, but don't shut each other out just because emotions are scary to navigate at times.

Please be kinder to yourself. Seek intimate friendships, AND seek professional help when you need more support than your friends can provide. Just don't assume your friends can't give you any support! Assume that they love you and trust that they will tell you if they're at their limit. And if they *are* at their limit or if they just aren't comfortable with some conversations, respect that & don't try to force it onto them.

This has been a PSA. Thank you.

#psa #therapy #friendship #relationships #mental health

[huntinglove]

How to get away from antiship spaces (mostly)

Warnings: Long post, antis mention, mentions of pedophilia, rape, self harm and gore (none show, not descriptive)

Have you recently learned that you align yourself with the proship label? Would you like to get away from antis as safely as you can? Here's what I've learned, as an ex anti:

1. It may be hard, but try to get rid of/abandon your accounts where you used to interact with antis.

This is one of the hardest steps because having a lot of followers can be discouraging, but it's the safest approach in this situation, because if antis see you following or interacting with proshippers they WILL question you about it and depending on how you tackle their asks they'll throw you to the wolves and publicly "warn" people about you so people can mass report your account/harass you

This applies to anything; Tumblr blogs, Twitter profiles, Discord servers, if you've interacted with antis block them and delete your account if you decide to adopt the proship label

Antis constantly claim that they don't harass people but as soon as someone drops the anti label they dogpile them and call them "traitors" as well as their usual buzzwords to catch people's attention, it's better to pull the plug directly than just rebrand your account

1.5. If you REALLY want to keep your account because you've used it for a long time or because it works as a portfolio, please create a different account to post about proship content

If you make a new account remember to block your anti mutuals/followers from your main account before you start posting, art styles can be very unique and easy to spot similarities in, as well as typing patterns and reoccurring emojis/symbols

If there's the option to, keep your profile private until you've built a steady environment for yourself, if you prefer to keep your profile private permanently that's also a good option!

Remember, your safety matters more than numbers on a screen!

2. This one should go without saying but, please don't share much of your trauma/mental health issues/triggers with people online in general, but especially not with antis

I used to talk about my struggles and vent publicly a lot, antis would stalk my accounts and send me all types of fucked up content.

I've had people send me rape videos and threats, people telling me I deserved the abuse I went through, people would send me gore and self harm images, as well as suicide tutorials.

They can and will use all of it to their advantage, they're restless and will dig up even decade old posts if they feel it'll be useful for them. It can and will take a toll on your mental health, so please save yourself the trouble and only open up with people you genuinely trust and feel safe talking to!

You're not alone, but please don't let dangerous people take advantage of you when you're at a bad spot

3. Keep an eye on your followers, especially if your profiles are public. There are always some things to look out for to make sure your followers aren't antis pretending to be proshippers

According to my personal experience, here's some red flags to look out for:

A.Antis think that the word proship means problematic ship, so they'll refer to pairings as "a proship"

Most proshippers dislike this terminology because it comes from an incorrect definition and usually avoid it

B. TikTok antis specifically come up and use a lot of emoji combos, creating meanings for them and usually adding one or two combos that are actually known to proshippers, along with some never seen before

A lot of the time they use it to identify themselves, a sign that means "I'm not actually a proshipper, just baiting"

I've also seen antis use the clover emoji in combos, inspired by the "clovergender/cloversexual" scam that 4channers came up with, to make it seem like the LGBTQ+ community was welcoming to offending pedophiles. Antis do this because they assimilate the proship label with problematic ships, mostly age gaps/underage content

C. Their account is brand new but they already follow a lot of proshippers. This is usually because they'll follow proshippers who've been posted on a blocklist, usually in the exact order that they've been listed too

If they're on Tumblr, they'll usually keep the people they follow public, so that other antis can find and harass those proshippers

D. Keep an eye on their follow list. Like stated above, they'll usually keep it public and 9 times out of 10 there will be an out of place antiship account, it's most likely their main profile/account/blog

E. They'll use their usual buzzwords on their own posts

For example, if they're trying to mimic a proselfship account they'll post pictures of underage characters and caption it things like "omg i'm such a pedo" and tag their post with proship related tags

Of course this doesn't apply to everyone, so it's always important to take context into consideration, as well as how many of these red flags may apply.

And lastly, please remember that the block button is your friend.

If someone's interacting with you and something about them seems/feels off, block and move on

#✯ let's get serious #pro fiction #pro ship #proselfship #profic #proship #pro ship safe #pro shipping #profiction #proship positivity #proship safe #proship selfship #proshipper #proshipping #selfship proship #profandom #comship #comshipper #comship safe #comship positivity

[ladyluscinia]

I'm already so sick of how the fallout of ofmd season 2 has snowballed into people on here going "fandom these days just can't handle Bad Things happening in media-- newsflash, characters have to get hurt and die, grow up!" all condescending like. First of all, in the context of Izzy, most people I've seen discuss his death agree that they would've accepted and enjoyed his death if it had just been handled appropriately, and also. "You just can't handle bad things happening to your fave!" Bruh. We were all partying it up when Izzy lost his fucking leg and was suffering physically and mentally. It can be FUN to see your blorbo suffer!

And that is just one example of a larger trend on this site-- people are really gonna come onto the "we love putting our blorbos in the blender and watching them struggle and suffer" site and say "kids these days can't handle Bad Things happening to their blorbos." Sorry, but that's just nonsense. Fandom loves their fix-its, but they also love shattering their faves. The problem has never been Bad Things happening in general, but HOW those things are framed within the narrative and how that narrative is told. The problem is when something is out of place in its genre, or when it goes against a promise the show has made, or when suffering is used flippantly and uncaringly, or when a character suffers and suffers and then just when they've finally caught a break, they're kicked down again, just for a cheap tug at your heartstrings.

Both within the context of ofmd AND in a wider fandom context, fandoms LOVE when our blorbos are hurt, as long as our blorbos are hurt RIGHT.

... And I think it sure is Something that a fandom can have a rampant issue with fans of a character being harassed and sent death threats and that's just "normal fandom being fandom" but god forbid people feel Emotions. About a Character and a Show. And dare to react by... just Offering Criticism! No, death threats are "fandom culture that comes with the territory," but if you vent post or criticize a writing decision in media, THAT'S being "hysterical" and "overly emotional" and "truly frightening behavior!" I just LOVE (big sarcasm) how back when people were getting doxxed and threatened for liking a guy, the fandom was all *cricket noises,* but NOW suddenly everyone is "terrified and exhausted by fandom's volatility" and "concerned about the fragile mental health of fans" when you simply say "damn that episode sucked and I sure am sad about it."

The OFMD fandom was toxic as fuck for a year and a half and continued to be toxic as fuck for all the airing of S2, so hardly surprising that the aftermath of S2 appears to be... toxic as fuck.

Least surprising thing in the world is that the people who hated Izzy and passively or actively supported driving his fans out of the fandom for "ruining it for everyone else" now think his fans should leave the fandom if they are so upset and stop leveraging "baseless criticism" at the show that is "ruining it for everyone else." They have normal not-at-all-parasocial relationships leading them to directly @ David Jenkins and thank him for a season that somehow managed to be both flawless and have all its flaws blamed on MAX, but those wretched Izzy stans have horrible-evil-parasocial relationships making them harass the crew by *footage not found*

If Mr. Jenkins decides to go scroll the #ofmd s2 tag on tumblr and stumbles across me - a random blog and icon - outlining how I think he fucked his show up, that's pretty clearly on him? This is tumblr. I have no relationship with this man or obligation to tailor every word I say as if he's bound to see it and going to take it personally???

I'm actually a big proponent of "Don't @ the cast and crew about pretty much anything" because the same fandom mentality that makes you think you can randomly ask him about your headcanon like you're chatting is what all these people are melting down about if someone directly goes "hey you killed my favorite character and that makes me mad!" - same fucking people, same fucking parasocial relationship. The standard of "only @ them for good things" is the flimsiest fucking line, as any ao3 writer who has received unsolicited "constructive criticism" or "advice" can tell you.

If we want to snidely get into "what this is really about" well it's the same fucking thing it was before:

People substituting subjective opinion as objective fact with zero self-awareness of doing so. "I liked this so it's good." "I didn't like this so it's bad." "I got bad vibes from that character so he was clearly written to be horrendous and unlikable." "I sympathized with this character so anyone suggesting he has flaws is demonizing him."

Or the deepest circle of fandom hell: "I think [insert identity] rep is so important and this piece of media fits into however I personally define 'good rep', therefore it is flawless and/or morally significant enough to be above criticism."

...which, yeah, leads to temper tantrum levels of fandom infighting, especially since people online express, fairly frequently, "I didn't like it because it was bad" and then present evidence for their point. And also a lot of fandom likes bad TV. Or even just mediocre TV that's entertaining.

I personally was not going to be happy about any person beyond one-offs, blatant villains, and background randoms dying because "they had to" (for their own arc or someone else's) because I fundamentally think if you believe you've written yourself into that corner in a workplace comedy that's built around a main romance arc... you're kinda stupid. Yes, even if it's pirate themed. Enough injuries have been walked off and lampshaded to confirm that part is aesthetic.

The fandom wiki for The Office lists 11 deceased characters. Three of them are fictional characters who die in an action-movie episode. Two are one-offs that get named dropped seasons later as having died offscreen. One of them is an offscreen cat, who appears to have had a more significant death plotwise and emotionally than any of the humans, and another is a woman who literally exists as a picture someone makes up a personality for and then discovers the real woman died. The most significant character on the list is a temp boss that got a four episode story arc about being a useless idiot who died in the hospital after a basketball dunking accident.

That is a show that ran for 9 seasons and over 200 episodes. It's pretty universally regarded as good, and the cringe asshole boss getting genuinely moving emotional beats is a big part of that. I think we can maybe pretty confidently say that reflecting the random realities of death is not essential to every story.

If OFMD wants to be evaluated as a hard-hitting drama or a queer story about the struggle of piracy against the Evil Empire, I will compare it to Black Sails instead of The Office. I just don't think David Jenkins is going to enjoy that comparison.

I'm not going to lower my standards because [insert rep reason the show must absolutely be a wild success here].

#our flag means death #ofmd s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd critical #ok now back to my angry breakdown of three act structure because i don't think some people know that act 2 doesn't just downswing randomly #like it has a purpose #fandom culture #ofmd harassment #character death #ask #anon #ladyluscinia

[eddiediazismyhusband]

It was an interview full of "right now" and "at this moment" from both Ryan and Tim. I'm genuinely wondering why the freak out from everyone? Interviews are always, ALWAYS, answered and arranged for the current episode/arc. People do know that right? No one, even the PR dorks that are Oliver and Ryan, are ever going to say "so yeah, Eddie is going to propose to his girlfriend but have a near death experience near the season finale that will change everything and he will shout his love for Buck." That interview is literally never going to happen. And honestly him proposing makes a ton of sense from a story standpoint. It's technically everything he claims he wants, so how does Eddie react when things still don't feel right? If the storyline is headed toward a relationship with Buck, and it genuinely does feel like that, Eddie seemingly getting everything he's ever wanted and still feeling off is the perfect introduction to that. I'm stupidly stunned every time by the unhinged break downs after every fucking interview.

To be fair, anxiety is a very real issue for a lot of people (me being one of them, it doesn’t take much to send me spiraling) and in fact i am a catastrophizer… i see something and immediately jump to the worst conclusions about it and only then do i sit back and put thought into it.

I don’t like to post when i’m catastrophizing because all it does is stirs even more panic and anxiety, but others find it easier to post their panic/spiraling so that hopefully others may he able to offer a different point of view to talk them down from their panic. mental health is one bicth of a human condition.

so while yes, it is definitely jarring to see people panicking, i try to remain gracious to those who are spiraling because i understand the panic that sets in and the urgency for someone to tell you that everything is okay.

as far as knowing the ins and outs of how television and pr works; unfortunately a lot of people are not educated on how things like this go because we live in an age where weekly episodic releases like this are becoming less and less common as binge culture has become the hot commodity, especially for streaming services. with that there comes a level of misunderstanding of how the industry works and has worked in the past, especially for a younger audience. so a lot of viewers are used to having the whole story handed to them all at once, rather than the intensive speculation and uncertainty that comes with network tv.

i myself having worked in film and theatre have firsthand experience with PR and the media and how to keep things under wraps (i am by NO WAY an insider, i have worked on student/college/indie films and have had zero involvement in the commercial film industry) and i STILL sometimes struggle from that initial shock of reading something that seemingly doesn’t bode well for what you want to see from a television show.

so all of that to say is i understand it can be jarring and at times even annoying to see the catastrophizing and spiraling, but it helps me to step back and take a breath to remind myself to give some grace to people who may not have as much of an understanding of how things like this work as i do.

thank you for the ask anon!! Apologies for the long reply, i just wanted to discuss this bc i have a lot of my own thoughts on it! 💕

#911 abc #911 on abc #eddie diaz #buddie #911 spoilers #evan buckley #911 #buddie 911 #buck and eddie #911 season 7 #evan buck buckely

[abyssleaves]

Why I'll Be Remaining in the Lurking For Love Community

Ok.

Honestly, I really don't want to make this.

I'm way too old for fandom drama, and I don't need to be making myself a target. My gut is telling me that it's a bad idea to get involved, and I'm inviting trouble for myself by posting this.

But the most recent post against Tom is just ridiculous and I can't not speak my piece.

I'm not linking to it or reblogging it because I don't want to send hate anyone's way, and honestly because I'm going to block them as soon as this is posted. You can read mine and theirs for yourself and decide what you think.

As far as the “anti-Latino” posts that Tom liked, I can't speak to whether they do damage, or what Tom’s views actually are. I am not Latino, and I'm not Tom. It's not my place. But I will say I was aware of those posts long before I saw that “callout” post, and it's because multiple Latino artists I follow liked and retweeted them. At the time, I was given to understand that they were satirizing the fact that both were styles of stereotypes, but one was acceptable while the other was not, despite both being bad. I can't say, based on just those tweets, that I see any anti-Latino sentiment in Tom. I'm willing to admit that my knowledge on that front isn't bomb-proof.

The second point, well... I'm sorry to the friend that feels used. They're entitled to be hurt. And I will readily admit that I'm only able to respond to the info within that post. Maybe there IS more to it.

But I don't think that Tom ceasing contact over the hormones is surprising at all, from a mental health standpoint. Put yourself in his shoes: you're a trans person in US, which is its own struggle, and you've reached your mid/early 20s without being able to attain gender-affirming care. Now someone years younger than you just got the thing you want more than anything else. Sure, you might be happy for them. But that is also going to hurt, horribly. You really have three options:

1) stay friends and smother the bitterness/possible resentment. That will either end up ruining your mental health, or coming out and ruining the friendship anyway.

2) Ask your friend not to tell you/post about their transition. That makes it about you and also ruins something that should make them happy.

3) Distance yourself.

Maybe he should have spoken more directly with you about his feelings, granted. But, Tom has not been shy about the fact that he struggles with his mental health. None of us handle every situation well. As far as his occasional venting, I would think, if you WERE his friend, you might have some compassion, and either cease contact if the friendship is not fulfilling, or accept his sincere, well-written apology (Which are the ONLY words straight from Tom’s mouth on the entire fucking post).

Instead, you got the apology from him, and then shared a bunch of gossip between you and another friend, and outed your interpretations of his vent sessions to the world. That's not exactly classy, posting about how he sought people he felt safe with during a time when a big chunk of the community he built is telling him to do horrible things to himself.

I want to make it clear that I don't agree with all of Tom’s views as expressed on his initial explanation post. Again, many of them are issues that I don't feel are my place to get involved in, and therefore I stayed quiet at the time.

I'm aware that the justified and intense hurt felt by people in those communities can mean that even differing opinions feel like a slap in the face. You have every right to see Tom’s views as hurtful and choose to leave, and/or make a separate community for support. I don't blame people who are in those communities for doing so. This post is aimed at the obsessed minority that won't leave the tag/remaining fans/Tom alone.

All of the above being said, the reaction to Tom’s post is the most “touch grass” thing I have ever seen.

Tom liking one or two comics from a dark-humor comic artist so widespread on the internet that I didn't even know he had an actual page, or anything about him as a person (something Tom also stated) = Tom is a Nazi sympathizer.

Tom saying “I don't care for neopronouns, but I won't attack you for using them and will respect what everyone wants to be called” = Tom is a monstrous bigot.

The racism accusation has me especially 💀. All because he liked a post about help from an unexpected source and that we should be kinder to each other.

How on earth are you going to tell a POC that he doesn't know what racism is because he’s NOT THE RIGHT KIND OF POC? Do you hear yourself?

(FWIW, I also don't agree with kink at pride. Sorry. LGBTQ+ people are not "narsty little freaks"--yeah I SAW that post--they're people. They can be kinky, they can be vanilla, whatever. Kink has nothing to do with your orientation, and therefore it isn't part of Pride. Also, my guys, if you're having public sex/being nude at pride for kink reasons, then you're not part of the healthy kink community: safe, sane, and CONSENSUAL. Nobody around you consented to that. Similarly, while I feel that sex education for minors should be normalized in order to give them better tools to tell when they're being groomed, seeing strangers with no pants on is NOT education, that's involving minors in your fetish. And that's fucking gross. )

The LGBTQ+ community in the US is in a lot of trouble right now, and we have a very bad habit of eating our own. We divide and subdivide and allow ourselves to be carved up by a united conservative front.

We do not allow for differing levels of leftist beliefs, and we constantly accuse each other of being not POC/leftists/queer enough, or being the wrong kind, or using a term for ourselves that some other individuals don't like. A great deal of the bullying leveled against him is justified by others saying that he's choosing to support a party that will turn on him and cause him and others like him harm.

Well, to be honest, the only community I see doing that right now is this one.

The amount of disingenuous “OMG, just FYI everyone to everyone hurt by [situation], I’M not transphobic/a bigot, you're all welcome here 😌” posts from people, who did not read his post, did not link to or quote his post. Disgusting. You know very well that nothing in his explanation or in his actions throughout his time in the community pointed to any abuse ON HIS PART towards trans people, non-binary people, people of the Jewish faith, or POC. You're virtue signaling, you're putting lambs blood above your door to keep the baying mob away.

This is insane. When did differing opinions turn into this? You don't have to agree with Tom’s views on anything. You're welcome to not follow his accounts, not like his art, not buy his game. If you feel that his opinions are too severely different from yours, you should be allowed to leave the fandom without people telling you that you should do bad things to yourself because your opinions don't match theirs (sound familiar?).

But…please. Can we stop with this awful parasocial obsession with his personal page? You can't lie to yourself and call it anything other than literal stalking. It's creepy as hell, and it reflects more on you than on him, in the long run. People might agree with your outrage, but deep down, they're afraid of being the next target, and they stay quiet out of fear that you'll stalk them next and send a mob hurling abuse their way.

To Tom, I'm sorry that this happened to you. You didn't deserve anything even close to this level of vitriol and abuse. You started from scratch and created a character and story that I feel was something truly unique. You reached an incredible number of people's hearts with Lurking for Love and Jacob, and no matter what happens from here with both of them, you deserve to feel proud of that. I hope that you are ok. Being a public figure on the internet doesn't mean you don't have a right to private opinions or even just general privacy.

I'm not tagging any characters in this. I'm only tagging the game because I hope other fans get to see that they're not alone. I don't believe the tags should be polluted this way. If you have to discuss a creator, it should be in his tag and not in a fandom space.

I'm aware that there will be deliberate bad-faith readings of this, or nitpicking of things I didn't cover. Whoever wants to, go ahead and respond, but I've said what I came to say, and I have nothing more to add. My inbox is closed and I love the block button.

#lurking for love #lfl game #carnivorekitty

[recovery-is-brutal]

Fuck it. Dethklok's Love Languages.

DSR and AOTD spoilers!

Nathan Explosion

Nathan struggles to say "I love you" out loud. Anything that involves him directly admitting that he cares or that he's sorry is very difficult for him. He's fantastic at coming up with the most brutal, messed up lyrics, always finding the right words for the right songs, but voicing his feelings? That's hard. Every once in a while, it slips out - but more often than not, it happens when he's alone and the person in question isn't present. ("I liked him" after Dr. Twinkletits is attacked by the yard wolves, "Miss the little guy already" when collecting Toki's laundry after he leaves). He gets much better at it over time though; directly telling Murderface that he would risk his life for him in DSR, or apologizing to the fans and showing appreciation for them in AOTD for example.

While saying things out loud is hard for Nathan, he very obviously tends to show his affection in actions. Despite his "no caring" rule, he is definitely someone who cares. A lot. He cares so much that losing his bandmates makes its way into his nightmares. He cares so much that he's willing to break up with his girlfriend for the sake of his bandmates. He cares so much that he follows Skwisgaar to Sweden. His deep care towards his bandmates becomes more and more apparent the longer the series goes on, and in RSD and AOTD in particular, Nathan shows just how far he would go for his loved ones, completely surpassing his own expectations of himself and choosing to become "the hand" instead of the "the fist".

While he learns to communicate in words more often later on as well, Nathan's main love language is definitely Acts of Service. He goes all the way for the people he cares about and defends them with his life (quite literally). You may never hear him say "I love you to the moon and back" directly to you, but he will learn everything he can about you, help you with everything he can, take you to the doctor, hold your hand through difficult situations. Gifts are another big one, he tends to give expensive or meaningful gifts to the people he cares about, since it's probably easier than saying "I care" out loud.

Pickles the Drummer

One thing about Pickles is that he remembers everything about you. That ice cream flavor you once mentioned you liked. Whether you like olives or not. Your favorite mineral water brand. If you're allergic to something or not. He does it effortlessly - it comes naturally to him when he cares about you. It's a surprise how he memorizes anything at all, considering how drunk/high he is most of the time, but when people are important to him, it just sticks right away. Another thing about him is that he's willing to respect potential triggers and try to protect you from seeing something that might upset you ("I'm not gonna stop drinking and doing drugs, but I'll do it where you can't see it"). He understands and respects mental health issues and does his best to be helpful.

Pickles is also often the one taking responsibility. The problem solver. The helper. When someone else fails at a task, he has no problem taking it over (ex. Nathan and Murderface both failing at the speech in Dethtroll). When Magnus is kicked out of the band, it's Pickles suggesting it's time to find another guitarist in RSD. Especially in Season 4 and AOTD, he's often in the role of the "parent", scolding his bandmembers for shitty behavior ("shame on you for bullying Toki over his diabetes!"), caring for Toki as he regresses in AOTD, cheering Nathan on more than anyone else when he doesn't believe in himself anymore, the list goes on and on. Can we also talk about him letting Skwisgaar and Murderface sleep in his bed with him in Dethcamp? Beautiful.

His main love language is also Acts of Service, as well as Words of Affirmation. Pickles is great at talking you out of your hopelessness and reminding you of your good qualities, as well as what you're fighting for. He wants to take care of whatever is upsetting the people he cares about. He wants to get rid of whatever hindrance there is himself. Pickles takes control to make life a bit easier for you and tells you how well you're doing in the same breath. If you ever have a panic attack around him, he will ground you to his best ability - better than any of the other Dethklok members probably, too. He's incredibly understanding and supportive towards the people he cares for.

William Murderface

Murderface sometimes gets a bit too close to his bandmates, putting his hands on their shoulders and backs, reaching for their hands... the same goes for other people. Sometimes strangers. He leans over them, gets all the way into their faces. He does know boundaries, that's not it. He also knows that he's crossing them at times. But William is the type of guy who absolutely cannot say "I love you". William can't even say "I like you". The best thing he can say is "I don't hate you". He was raised harshly, treated harshly, and the one thing he craves more than anything else is Physical Touch. Murderface firmly believes that caring for someone involves wanting to be near them. It's not something he would say out loud to anyone, but his idea of affection is holding hands, leaning against each other, hugging. He's very, very touch starved and very, very sexually frustrated. Someone just cupping his cheek would probably catch him off guard. His harsh facade would melt away entirely, even if just for a second before he asks you what the fuck you're doing.

Since most people react negatively to his touch, Murderface often resorts to Quality Time. Especially with Toki, Knubbler and sometimes Skwisgaar. He's often seen hanging out with them in particular, obviously choosing to spend several hours with them, and only them. Even if nothing eventful happens, it seems he's just happy being with them (even if he doesn't visibly show it). When he tries to get someone to have sex with him, he spends a lot of time preparing himself, even showing up in a suit with flowers for the special moment. It seems that giving undivided attention to the people he cares about is a way for him to show his appreciation. He's happy watching movies and eating with his bandmates, and isolates himself from them as a "punishment" in AOTD because he feels undeserving of them. Even the stranger who hypnotizes him in DSR shakes his hand in order to gain his trust more easily.

Murderface is often seen softening up when someone touches him and gives him Words of Affirmation (ex. in DSR when he's like "You wouldn't save me if I was the one kidnapped", but the moment Nathan puts his hand on his shoulder and says he'd risk his life for him, his entire body language immediately changes. Similar in AOTD, when he speaks negatively about himself, his tone changes once his shoulder is touched and he's reassured that he has a role in the band). Especially in the first season, he often makes negative remarks about himself and takes drastic measures such as wanting to leave, in an attempt to receive nice comments and attention from his bandmates. He needs a lot of reassurance in general.

Skwisgaar Skwigelf

Skwisgaar is well known for two things - the guitar playing, and the sex. You'd expect his love language to be physical touch, considering just how much sex he has, but he actually doesn't seem to enjoy being touched in a non sexual scenario (directly telling mostly Toki not to touch him many, many times throughout the series). It's kind of difficult to pinpoint exactly what love language defines his behavior, because Skwisgaar tends to close himself off emotionally. He seems to view himself as "above" other people - or below them as well at times. But something's for certain: He's extremely observant. He remembers many things his bandmates tell him, very personal and intimate details at times (ex. Toki's triggers). He's the first and only one to notice Murderface's strange behavior in AOTD. He knows a lot of things, but doesn't speak about them very much. This guy can keep a secret or two. He'd probably help you hide a body if you asked him nicely.

In a way, that makes his main love language Acts of Service. He discretely keeps an eye on his bandmates and observes them from a distance, so he's the first to know when something isn't right. He shows concern for his bandmates when they display new or different behaviors (ex. Toki's excessive drinking, hanging out with Rockzo, Murderface in AOTD...) and expresses this to the others. Whenever he's having sex with someone, he shows concern for their wellbeing ("lets me know if I tickles you", "lady you so skinny you look sick"), and he lets his hookups stay in his bed and sleep with him until they're ready to leave. He treats them with respect. He treats them like people. They're not just objects for his pleasure.

Though Skwisgaar appears emotionally constipated at times, he is anything but. He comes across as harsh and insensitive a lot of the time, but he honestly just doesn't have a filter. Plus, it needs to get out. What he doesn't express verbally, his body expresses for him. For example, he gets physically sick whenever his mother is around, he subconsciously stims with his guitar when he's in pain or upset... You might not hear him say "I love you" out loud, like, very often if at all. But he will stim more if you bring up that other guy you've been spending a lot of time with. He noticed you talking in your sleep more often, what's up with that? Also, when's the last time you've eaten?

Toki Wartooth

Right away: Physical Touch. Toki craves hugs, hand holding and the like more obviously than any other Dethklok member. Much like Murderface, he never received any proper affection as a child, and heavily associates physical softness and tenderness with being appreciated. He reaches out to his bandmates for hugs several times (especially Skwisgaar who he greatly admires), is very affectionate with his cat, and even when he's being playful or messing with the others, he's punching them, nudging them, getting close to them in any way. He craves meaningful connections with people, and even just in his daydreams about them, he's holding their hands a lot, or reaching out to them. Even Magnus has his arm around him in Dethcamp - and Toki has a wide smile on his face. He clings to Abigail for comfort in DSR, and she holds him close as he drifts off to his much deserved sleep. This is the easiest way for Toki to understand that he's cared for. Being held. And holding others (ex. picking up and carrying Skwisgaar in AOTD).

Another one is Gift Giving. A rare one, but it definitely is the case for him. He makes Murderface his Macaroni Murder Lady for his birthday, even though he's already getting a huge gift from the entire band. He happily gives his breakfast to a hungover Pickles in Mordland. The snowglobe that Nathan gives him before he's off to to the camp is something he holds very dear and treasures a lot. The tuning device Skwisgaar gives him in AOTD? He carries it around with him everywhere. There are probably more moments, but these are the ones I remember on top of my head. Gifts are very meaningful to him, and a way for him to express his care for the people he loves - and remember that he's cared for as well.

Toki is generally very open and direct with his feelings. I think he could adapt to any love language, really. He appreciates any form of affection towards him. But Physical Touch in particular is something he holds very dear. The one thing he really struggles with is when someone won't let him touch them. Maybe he could adapt to it if it was explained to him that it's not personal rejection, but it would take him some time to stop trying to initiate hugs and cuddles. Then, Words of Affirmation are very, very much needed. Of course he appreciates Acts of Service and Quality Time as well, but he doesn't read those as "love" very well. He needs to feel or hear it.

Bonus: Magnus Hammersmith

I can honestly only theorize about Magnus, since he's simply not shown often enough throughout the series - or in a very positive light. But from what I've gathered, I personally believe that he, very much like Pickles, likes to take the lead. He's a "fixer" and a "protector", though Magnus is much more forceful about it. He believes that everyone has to do exactly as he says, because his way is the best way for everyone involved. It upsets him when someone doesn't let him "fix" or "handle" something, because it feels like personal rejection to him. His love language is Acts of Service, in a twisted, messed up way. But also... Words of Affirmation. His way of showing that he cares is to take the wheel, to fix his loved ones' lives (whether they want it or not), but his way of feeling loved is to hear it. A simple "thank you for your advice" is often enough to satisfy him, even if you don't end up actually taking it. He immediately softens up when you let him know that his input is appreciated, and that you know he cares. When you say "I love you" to him, he is so taken aback that he doesn't know how to respond. Definitely not with "I love you too", but probably by giving you the bigger half of his cookie.

#mtl #metalocalypse #nathan explosion #skwisgaar skwigelf #william murderface #toki wartooth #pickles the drummer #dethklok #headcanons #magnus hammersmith

[kushblazer666]

i hope it's ok to send a message as a swiftie who has struggled with mental health issues my whole life.

first off, it's fine not to like her! or her music! i don't want to seem like i'm in anyway attacking you for not being into her.

but it would be kinder if you could dislike her or even her fandom without being ableist. someone liking taylor swift doesn't mean their diagnoses aren't real or that they'd called 911 on a homeless person (??? deeply confused by that one tbh).

those twitter posts were just people who struggle with things getting excited over new music that they find relatable. that doesn't deserve the ableist mocking.

i hope this makes sense and i hope you have a good day!

okay well first off you seem to be attributing things other people are saying on that post to things im saying. which im not. i never said the 911 thing or implied that the sources dont actually have mental illness so dont put words in my mouth

second it seems to me that it’s the swifties who are being ableist here by romanticizing mental illness to the extreme. mental illness isnt some secret superpower that unlocks hidden truths that all the normies are too oblivious to see. and if it did the things it would reveal certainly wouldnt be the “real” meaning of pop songs from the most successful and popular musician alive on the earth today. come the fuck on. mental illness is exactly that: an illness. it just makes you sick

la beast voice have a good day

[gingerylangylang1979]

Will Carmy become an addict?... Also, exactly what are his mental health (or other) issues?

This conversation is an offshoot of thoughts expressed here in conversation with @november-rising.

I'll start by saying I do not think Carmy is currently an addict or in recovery from an addiction. But, could Carmy become an addict like his dad (was he an addict or just a heavy abuser, we don't know) Mikey, and Donna? Maybe. Also, I hope nothing I write is offensive to anyone. If anyone thinks there is something I'm missing or misrepresenting please share and we can talk about it. I'm open to learning.

The statistic rates for people impacted by another person's addiction becoming an addict themselves is high. I myself had a drug addict mom and an alcoholic ex. I dabbled in drugs but never became an addict unless you count cigarettes and weed (no longer do either). How me and my brother didn't end up addicts despite our experimentation with hard substances is beyond me. All of the prerequisites were in place and I feel like we almost were tempting it like, come on, I know you want to take me, yet, neither of us ended up addicts.

Sometimes I felt it would make things easier. I think it was Lou Reed, maybe, who said something like addiction made life simple because then you only have one problem to deal with. I wish I only had one problem. I tried stuff as hard as coke, meth, and opium. I was a bartender and partied but never became an alcoholic. My brother went as far as trying heroin a few times. But neither of us became addicts. It's insane if you think about it.

Does that mean we didn't/do participate in fucked up self-destructive behavior? Hell no. Most of my life I have battled with trying to "be normal" all the while self sabotaging all along the way. But I never became an addict.

This is why it's so easy for me to see Carmy in all of his darkness and still see how he isn't necessarily someone doomed to become an addict. Nat didn't become one, me and my brother didn't become ones. I see a lot of us in Nat and Carmy. Carmy is way worse off than Nat, for sure. How, I dunno. And I would say I'm closer to Carmy in the melancholic creative way than my brother. So it's kind of a weird blessing that traumatized people who you would think would become addicts, don't, but it happens.

Could Carmy become one? I think if he continues to not address his issues with individual therapy, continues to blame himself, and just continues the same grind he wanted to escape, possibly. But I'm looking more to how Storer and Co. are telling the story as my signs more than Carmy's actual history. I guess I just don't see what the show would have to gain from Carmy becoming an addict. It would be a tragic ending. I'm not beyond them doing some tragic ending but I think it would just be kind of lame and what was the point if it ends with Carmy continuing the cycle and becoming an addict.

I see him and Nat as the second chance for the Berzattos. She is about to be a mom and hopefully will raise a child that doesn't have to witness any of the trauma she did. Carmy is trying to start over and I think as much as he is struggling now and it may get worse before better, I just see too many points of lightness for him to crawl towards/through. And I think this being so inspired by Storer's lived experience, I can't see him wanting it to end in doom and gloom. Chris and Coco are Carmy and Nat to me. They broke the curse. I think because of that he would want the show to reflect that.

Now, what the fuck is wrong with Carmy, in detail. I will start by saying we don't really know a diagnosis. I think common/possibly correct assumptions are a mix of anxiety, depression, and CPTSD. But I've also seen other ideas like maybe he is on the spectrum among other things. I'm not quick to say anything outside of the first three. He could be neurodivergent, but I guess what makes me not want to say that is because when people bring it up there is often this sentiment that it explains everything about him or that is takes precedent over his behavior being a reaction to his trauma. Two things can be true at the same time but I sometimes feel people apply neurodivergence in a way that dismisses how the average person would deal with a series of overlapping traumas.

The same way I see people assign Sydney as being neurodivergent and I'm like, or she could just be dealing with a lot of bullshit and trauma as a black woman? Because shit, I'm similar, does that mean I'm neurodivergent, too? Not to take away anyone who is neurodivergent and they relate to things they see in the characters. I'm just saying be careful to not dismiss common reactions to lived experience as such without more insight. Or sometimes people can be awkward or quirky without it being neurodivergence. Like sometimes it comes across as what we do know the characters have gone through isn't enough to justify what we see.

I will say I could see a case for Carmy having a learning disability. The evidence being his dislike for reading extensively and his very poor math skills. I think it was @eatandsleepwell who pointed out he only likes books with pictures. It's true. Most of his books are image heavy. And a lot of people are bad at math but he can't keep up with basic addition and subtraction (aka dyscalculia). But again, I think we are seeing evidence of this specific condition, not vague symptoms that could occur due to a number of things.

None of this is to say speculation or headcanons are not welcome. But to hard assign diagnosis is another thing.

#carmy berzatto #the bear fx #addiction #trauma

[cccccasperghost]

Does anyone else feel a little icky about oakworthy rn?

Especially after this episode it just doesn't feel right. Like at first it was fucking sweet to see a queer person in the main cast, like "oh an awkward quirky boy crushing on an overly confident drama dweeb, sick."

After the comedy standup episode and learning that no he didn't steal the mascot costume for school spirit and no he doesn't actually like Normal I was like ok cool, not ideal but certainly salvageable. Maybe an friends to enemies to lovers kind of thing, I still have hope for them.

Them after that is was just all downhill. It feels more like Hermie's just using the fact that Normal likes him for his own gain and that just doesn't sit right.

Like yeah Hermie has his own shit with his dad's going on as well as obvious mental health issues to deal with but that shouldn't be an excuse. And it certainly shouldn't be Normal's job to fix that.

And the fact that Normal is now developing actual feelings for Hermie and genuinely trying to help someone who (for lack of a better word because it feels too little to say crush) he loves just breaks me to see him get treated like this.

Hermie knows Normal likes him and he's actively using that to try and get Normal to first kill his dad then get with two of his friends.

Maybe if Hermie sees how much pain he's putting Normal through, or I don't know like Normal being doodlerised or something and he starts either trying or move on maybe then they can build a relationship or friendship.

I just want Normal to be happy, maybe it's just my own baggage filling into this or something but this isn't right. The amount of stress that Normal's under has got to stop.

I mean first your dad goes missing, then you realize your dad has been running some organization to fight monsters, turns out he isn't proud of you, one of you're friends alliance herself with a murderer, they kill your principal Infront of you, your dad fucked with the world up, you have to go into another dimension to save your dad, a weird monster thing from that world is the only person to see how hurt you are right now, you're finally able to go home, now your friends going through some shit that you have to help with. After that you learn that the boy you've been crushing on scammed you for your mascot costume, something you love very dearly, but that's fine you think its awesome that someone has that much school spirit- SIKE. Turns out he didn't do it for any reason you thought, actually he couldn't give less of a shit about you, now he's asking you to kill his dad for a date, then goes directly to you for advise to get with your friends after you learn that your very cruelty free very vegan and consent enforcing parents have been forcing your sister to fight and kill animals because she has to be the chosen one.

Like dude can't catch a break, so much is out of his control and none of the kids or adults seem to be doing anything about it or care. This is probably one of the only things he can control in his life and yet he's still getting hurt by it.

It would make sense if he got doodlerised and honestly that might have to be the thing that get his family and friends to care about it. I'm not saying all the other teens traumas and struggles aren't valid but you can't compare them.

Taylor has always had a good life, he's had a caring, rich, and financially stable mother.

Linc has two wonderful dads who care about his mental health and supports his interest, sure grant hasn't always been truthful about his really dangerous job but even when they were trying to keep the teens in the d.a.d.d.i.e.s building he cared about his sons wellbeing.

Scary is the only one out of them who stands a chance against the emotional pain scale against normal. Shehas a wonderful mother, but she struggles with not having her dad around and doesn't feel like she fits in her own family and now the fact that her step father has been shot in front of her which I'm not saying isn't as bad as what Normal's going through just hold on. All of the teens struggle don't even touch the generational pain that normal is going through with his entire life and the lives of his dad and uncle and his grandfather.

It's clear he's trying so hard to carry everyone else's pain and Hermie is deliberately using his kind and caring nature and it feels so wrong. He's not blind he can see how much normal is holding and using his emotions and Normal's knowledge on how he views him and using it against him.

I want so badly for it to work but I don't know how it can.

Anyways this was more stream of consciousness than I wanted but let me know your ideas on it, maybe I'm thinking about it wrong I don't know.

#i can't bare the pain of being #crying screaming gargling puking shitting streaming pissing fainting awaking crying #i know im thinking #too much about this #but i can't fucking stop #damn you autism and adhd #dungeons and daddies season 2 #dungeons and daddies #dndads season 2 #dndads #oakworthy #normally oak swallows garcia #hermie the unworthy

[elvenbeard]

House party scenes 5/5: Kerry and V

Finally getting some good sleep after all the guests have left again xD

I can (and do) talk about them for hours on end already... and I wanted to in this context too, obviously.

Like... Kerry doesn't have many close friends, not even, say, Denny, who lives next door and who he has a long history with, seems to be someone he's particularly close to. Yay for depression causing you to neglect (or even destroy) your friendships (or preventing you from forming them in the first place, cause "why would anyone even *wanna* be friends with me, I'm the worst human on earth").

For some reason though, Vince wanted to be with him, despite seeing him at his worst from the get go. It took Vince a while to realize that Kerry is hiding a lot of his hurt behind his coolness and "I don't give a fuck" attitude, and he's doing it very well (years of practise). Thing is... Vince does exactly the same thing, hiding all his vulnerability and softness behind the sleek, sneaky bastard persona he's built for himself. So, when Vince doesn't jump ship (literally), and stays, throughout the craziest shenanigans, throughout Kerry opening up about his demons, he realizes "damn... he might be the one" - or at least someone who really gets him and listens and understands where others wouldn't.

And then Vince starts introducing him to this gaggle of other misfits that somehow all found each other in this whole chaotic mess. And then they all treat Kerry like he's one of them just by association, even though he doesn't feel like he should belong, no matter how much he wants to belong somewhere again. The whole "something will come to an end and something new will begin" thing really takes on huge dimensions for Kerry's standards, beyond "just" a new album and "just" some new perspectives and "just" some new acquaintances, friends, love... It feels like a new life altogether, and he wouldn't have expected that to be even possible at his age anymore.

Of course, not everything is always perfect. Two people with big issues, big egos, with big trouble talking about feelings, struggling with mental and physical health and all kinds of stuff is not gonna be easy everyday. They have to put in work into their relationship to make it work, but with Vince, Kerry is certain for the first time in his life that it's really worth it all. And to Vince, the relationship with Kerry is honestly the healthiest he's ever had, once they worked out some initial communication issues. They don't just cure each other's issues with their love obviously, there's no such thing as magical healing dick. But they bring out the best in the other, and can just be themselves around each other without expectations, without putting on their masks, because they've seen and known each other at their worst from the start. That's what makes their bond so strong.

#cyberpunk 2077 #cp2077 #cyberpunk vp #cyberpunk 2077 vp #kerry eurodyne x v #kerry eurodyne #male v cyberpunk #my headcanons #otp: to bad decisions #vincent ezaki #my vp

[marinerainbow]

Ooh! I have a random fun OC question for you if you want it!

Imagine that Poppy's boyfriends came into her life in a different order. For example Moony was first, then Ben, then Henry was the most recent. How do you think that would change Poppy's character if at all? 🤔

If you don't answer, I hope this gives you something interesting to ponder anyway! ^^

Ohhh this is an interesting thought!! Granted, not all of Poppy's issues were caused by her relationship with Henry, but they did play a part in them. Being with the best guy out of the bunch while at her lowest point? Let's see...

Also, since Poppy met Henry in a bar, I'm gonna say she met Moony in that bar, too. It still fits for their characters at that point in time.

Moony, I imagine around this time, was just starting to work on himself. He had been at it for a bit when he met Poppy in the original timeline, so he was a bit better at himself. Here, though, he's only just picked up self-help books, and Cake isn't around yet to be his emotional support animal. He hadn't at all expected to see Poppy here, and neither did she him. I can imagine she already had a drink or two, so her reaction was a bit slow, but she was still scared of Moony. Moony, having no clue what to say to her and seeing she's scared does discourage him, but he sees she came out here alone and offers to call her a cab or something. His way of apologizing to her without overstaying his welcome. Though Poppy... She's not sure why, maybe it's the alcohol impairing her judgment. Or she's really lonely tonight. But she asks Moony to stay with her instead. Moony, caught off guard but not wanting to leave an intoxicated alone in this part of town, does sit with her. And they talk, and they laugh, and Moony drives her home so she can sleep ^^

Sorry, I wanted to type out that wholesome meeting XD anyways- Poppy is still in her miserable acting business and Moony is just starting to work on himself. So there are probably going to be moments between them. Like maybe Moony accidentally snarls at her even though he's angry at someone else, and Poppy is especially sensitive now and clings onto him in a not so healthy way. But they both genuinely love each other, and Moony does his best to treat her right- which he does. And he makes it clear to her that she didn't do anything wrong when he's mad. This allows Poppy to see him as just being a toon who needs help, so she's right beside him while he's figuring out how to handle himself. They both read the same books- which actually start to help Poppy herself, Poppy is understanding, albeit a bit overbearing with trying to make sure Moony is OK, and they even adopt Cake together ^^

So yeah, although it may not be 100% healthy with their struggle with mental and emotional health, they do still love and care for each other. They're just more delicate at these stages in their lives now. In this timeline, I can see Moony breaking things off with Poppy not because he fell out of love, but because he's too scared of hurting her. Despite Poppy's attempts to keep him around and convince him that she knows he won't hurt her, he still leaves, believing it to be the best for her. Which, honestly, probably left them both even more heartbroken, as they still love and yearn for each other. He does want to still be friends though, so Poppy does at least look forward to that (I'm debating on whether or not she'd try to convince him that they can still be together as friends, both for his sake and because she doesn't want to lose him as a boyfriend. She is more clingy and desperate for love at this point in time, but that also sounds too forceful for her. I'll have to think more on it).

And then Ben comes along and fucks up the progress Poppy was making 🙃 Poppy is of course left sad and heartbroken after Moony made it clear that he won't get back together with her. Then she meets this asshole in the same, if not similar, way she meets him in the OG timeline. She helps him out, but this time decides to give him her number for him to call her (since Moony didn't take all of Poppy's stuff, she has a nice simple house in Uptown. Meaning that she never lived in Downtown, and learned the dangers of offering your number to complete strangers. To put it in short, Poppy is more trusting of people at this point in time). Which he decides to do in the morning once he sobers up. They talk and meet up, and Poppy finds herself falling for this seemingly nice guy.

She feels bad, though. As she doesn't think she's ready to move on from Moony. Though after he encourages her to go ahead and start dating again (before he met this Ben, I assure you), she decided to give it a try. They seem pretty good together, at first. Ben seems to be a pretty decent fellow, despite his drinking, and Poppy wants to give him a chance like she gave Moony the chance he needed. Things seem to be going OK, until Poppy introduces Ben to her friend and ex, Moony. And doesn't hide the fact that they used to date because she's trying to be 100% honest with her partner ^^

Ben, seeing that he's not the first guy Poppy has been with (and feeling pretty insecure with Moony. He's tall, handsome, and has a nice voice), and the fact that now he knows that Poppy still talks with her ex, starts to grow distaste for her now. And Moony could sniff out that Ben wasn't a good egg from their meeting. Though he was more hesitant to bring this up with Poppy, not wanting her to think he's trying to take back what he said about her dating. Though once Poppy started confiding in him about how distant Ben has been and how he seems angry at her, that's when Moony decides he's had enough and goes to talk to Ben. He does have a better grip on his temper now. Though he's still pretty fucking pissed at Ben so he's probably still a bit intimidating while trying to be calm.

This is what spurs Ben to break up with Poppy here. Moony scared him. He had been thinking about doing it anyway, but Moony unintentionally made him go for it. He still tries to turn this around on Poppy, saying how you can't trust anybody who's friends with their ex, and then leaves Poppy confused and wondering what she did wrong. Moony comforts her as best as she can, and resists hunting down that jerk and tearing him a new one, but Poppy still feels guilty that she somehow made Ben think she couldn't be trusted (my god, baby girl, I'm so sorry you did nothing wrong! 😭😭😭).

Ah, now we get to the other bastard. Henry. Thanks to Moony, Poppy has been able to recover better from Ben, and just in general have a better well-being. He even helped her out with completely cutting her parents off ^^ she was hoping to spend some time by herself, so when Henry came along, she wasn't easily swayed. Flattered, yes, but she didn't take him home right away. He was just looking for some company, and as such, didn't pursue her further when she made it clear she wasn't interested in that. So unless Poppy somehow made it clear she was from the nice side of town, and he saw easy exploitation, he wouldn't have gone further with her like the OG timeline. So Poppy shouldn't have to worry about him ^^

... Though maybe Henry could steal her wallet/purse. And since that has all of her valuables, maybe Poppy could try filing a report with the local authorities. Which, perhaps at this time, could be a certain weasel patrol? 👀👀👀

I know you didn't involve her, but I wanted to add Shiny since I've been thinking about this. Bonus if Shiny was the one Poppy met that night at the bar.

Shiny is younger, but she does know by now what she likes. So she did try to woo Poppy similarly to Henry. She could see she had some money on her, so she was hoping to get a one night stand and rob the cute bunny while she was asleep. Though Poppy, although very charmed and flustered, was also denying the feelings this woman was invoking within her (that's another woman?? She don't hate, but she's not gay!... Right?). But again, this was while Poppy was at a very low point in her life and was far too easily won over. So, even though she was certain this wasn't going to lead anywhere, Poppy let Shiny come with her back to her house... Just to spend time together as friends! Nothing more!

Except they did take it to the bedroom... So Shiny didn't have to worry about getting a cab home... And they may or may not have gotten up close... And kissed... Aaaaaand it would have led to more, but Poppy decided she was too tired and snuggled into Shiny. Totally not because she was flustered and confused with herself and wanted to pause everything while she was figuring herself out. And since Poppy was holding onto her, Shiny couldn't slip out of the bed. So she had no choice but to cuddle the soft cutie. Oh what a terrible fate it was for the thief.

In the morning, Poppy apologizes for how she acted the night before while cooking up breakfast for them both (she honestly isn't sure what else to do XD), and Shiny assures her she did nothing wrong. Which she was being genuine about. She understands how overwhelming a sexual awakening can be. But she keeps getting distracted from eying the place for valuables because Poppy... Still wants to talk? First she made her food, and now she's trying to chat? What's next? She's gonna call her 'sweet'???... Oh god, Poppy did. Is she a cinnamon roll or just a kiss up? Shiny tries to deny her growing attachment to this little rabbit and decides to leave without taking anything. Well, except Poppy's number after it was offered... What!? Don't you look at her like that!

Eventually, the two fall in love and start dating ^^ it takes longer though, even though Poppy falls completely head over heels in love. Shiny has her own issues, feeling a bit afraid to get close with someone after losing her mother (I'm still ironing out her story, but I've got a better idea for Shiny's family now). But when she lets go and lets Pops in, she too completely falls deeply in love. Might get a bit too attached/protective of Poppy than her older self would, especially when she sees how much Poppy is going through at her job and her family. And Poppy is also very concerned about Shiny's way of life. But unlike with Moony, I don't see these two gals breaking up anytime soon.

Thank you so much for sending this in! It was very fun to imagine ^^ I hope you enjoy!

#asks #my own OC's #Poppy #Moony Wolf #Ben Cottontail #Henry Foxworth #Shiny Weasel #speaking of Poppy's ex's ive been thinking about what if the other weasels from the ships had met her when she was supposed to meet Henry #of course you and i have talked VIVEDLY about Greasy being Poppy's first ex- but ive been thinking about the other guys too #let me know if youre interested ^^

[snowdeong]

So anyway

Having anxiety is so odd cause I logged on to be like "uhh might be taking an indefinite hiatus" and instead of just saying that I now feel the need to like write an overly long, overly personal post about what's going on as if anyone cares 😭 and then it's like if I say that no one cares it sounds like I'm attention seeking or baiting people into telling me that they do when in actuality I just have a fucked sense of self that I'm trying (and failing lmao) to work on.

Which brings us back to the hiatus funnily enough cause yup. I haven't even written anything new just a few lines of a few ideas I have cooking but fuck part of why I'm struggling to just sit down and go for it is cause I know I will want to post and just the idea of posting makes me wanna throw up now. I know I can't just write it and keep it to myself cause like that's not how I roll but the idea of posting as me and being seen as me is just fucking awful.

It's the same issue I had in deukae fandom at some point, it felt like too many people knew me and I'd thought maybe the feeling came from the fact that I wasn't fully being myself? Cause part of me is being a horny gremlin that is never more happy than when I'm screaming about yeji's cock in someone's dms. But thinking about it, I honestly think being myself has made it worse 😭 I just don't feel comfortable doing anything online anymore 😭 it all just feels like a value judgement of myself and fuck I do not have enough self esteem for that shit.

I think I might do better posting anonymously, especially since on ao3 if it's anon you can't see metrics without going to the stats page but then it's like damn so having fun online and tryna make friends fucks up my mental health but the solution is to become a recluse. Which I do not want lmao. My life situation already makes me unbearingly lonely and miserable so maybe it's more that I'm used to that and being known is so vulnerable I'd be more comfy on my own? idk tbh I'm just stream of conciousing. All I do know is I don't enjoy keeping to myself but ig that'll be the move until whatever tf is going on in my head stops going on.

I'll probably pop in once in a while to post a meme or rb a friend so they know I'm not dead pff but yeah besides that I think it's bye for a bit.

PS. if I do post something and ya'll notice it's me please don't acknowledge it 🥺 I hate having to type this kinda thing cause it's not really a big deal and no one gives af but sigh just in case

#snowdd.txt #so fucking long and for what omg #idk what to post on the other acc cause again attention seeking idk but whatever maybe I'll just meme or something

[andthebeanstalk]

Hi there, I just wanted to stop by to say thank you for making your recent post about ‘getting dependent on mobility aids’ — I was tempted to comment on the post itself, but since replies have been shut off (which I’m assuming is because people were missing the point?), I figured anonymity would make it easier for me to share this😅 I think it’s important that you know it’s helping not only able bodied people look at it from a different perspective, but other ‘disabled’ people as well.

I’m 23, and have a whole host of health conditions, only a handful of which have actually been diagnosed, the others are still a mystery, and struggle a lot with feeling guilty about taking up space in the community, and the fact that I’m considering getting a mobility aid, because of all of those same reasons people around me have been telling me since I got sick. Reading this post helps make me feel a little bit better about the whole thing, and I just want to thank you for that❤️

— 🥀✨ Anon

[Anon is referring to this satire post I made]

Hey, this is the sweetest most rewarding goddamn message, and I'm incredibly grateful to you for it!! 💖💖💖💖

Also, it validates that everything I write about disability is ultimately written with the hope of making disabled people's lives better, and comments like this mean I am making worthwhile writing/art!!!

Also,

I want to make one thing very very clear:

There IS space for you here.

Obviously I don't speak for the entire disabled community, but I know I am not the only one who sees someone struggling to accept a disabled identity and has the thought, "Hey. Impostor syndrome is basically universal in the newly-disabled. Dont sweat it. You are welcome here."

So... You are welcome here. Says who? Says me. You are allowed to take up space in this community. You have more than permission, you have an invitation. You never needed one to take pride in your identity, but you have it now, in case that helps.

(Learning to undo our own internalized ableism is literally a lifelong process, but it is a worthwhile one.)

The best chances we have at survival and at thriving are by holding onto each other like a goddamn gundam made of cripples and neurodivergents, with no one being left behind.

Therefore, your presence (if you are respectful and kind, which seem to be your vibe) actually ADDS to our collective strength, rather than taking from it.

The actual "limited resources" that we're told disabled people must compete over are a result of systems that enforce a false idea of scarcity and trap us in isolation, poverty, and sickness.

Often, disabled people are the primary lifeline to other disabled people, actually. In my own personal experience (as disability is a huge category and no experience is universal among us except ableism), I've seen VERY little IRL competition among disabled people, but many instances of disabled people working together to demand a better conditions, plus countless instances of disabled people taking care of each other in everyday life.

The "prove you are disabled beyond a shadow of a doubt" mentality also supports these deadly ableist systems because it allows those in power to deny aid to those who cannot meet a ludicrously high burden of proof.

- Fuck that. Fuck that. I believe you. You have a condition that limits your ability? You can't do one or more vital tasks without constant pain?? That's a disability. You're disabled. And there's room for you to sit with us. Welcome.

I know that some people have internalized ableism, and occasionally this community does deal with the issue of gatekeeping. But I really believe those people are a vocal minority of the community as a whole - Most of us are just glad to have another comrade and co-conspirator!

There IS enough for all of us, and historically the only way these systems have actually changed is through a whole lot of disabled people banding together and helping to keep each other alive in the meantime.

And it's okay if what you need to do is just focus on keeping yourself alive. Like I said, you're a vital member of the team now, and the core of disability advocacy is someone should never be left behind. - It is morally and socially right for you to take care of yourself both on a collective and individual level, and that includes experimenting with mobility aids!

BUT ALSO - and this is VITAL - even if you go your WHOLE LIFE using more resources than you are able to provide, even if you can "only" contribute the extensive labor of keeping yourself alive for your entire life, you'd still DESERVE COMFORT, RESPECT, ACCOMMODATION, AND CARE. You would still be a valued part of this team because people who need a lot of help are not "drains", they are ENTIRE PEOPLE.

YOU are an entire person!

And if we as disabled people only measure value by how much a person can DO, then we become no better than the ableist systems that terrorize our lives whether we have accepted disability as an identity or not!

You are worth the effort of caring for you because you are ALIVE and a PERSON.

And while I don't believe in laziness as a concept, this would include you even if you were "lazy". Even if you were mean. I probably wouldn't want to invite a mean person to stuff - but like I said, you don't need an invitation to be in this community. You don't need permission to care for yourself or to have the rights of a full person!

Sacrifice for no reason is just self-harm!

You deserve accommodation because it is a HUMAN RIGHT to reduce pain and improve your quality of life without hurting anyone!!! You are wanted here even if you cannot fight or advocate or produce!!! It is not selfish to care for yourself with the tenderness you would show to a little puppy in pain! Or if it is, then maybe selfishness can be beautiful sometimes! - That is the core tenet of cripple punk and of disability liberation. ALL of us matter. Period. End of sentence. Full stop.

... All this to say, I think getting a mobility aid is a great idea!! And it makes me so so happy to rep how amazing it is to have the accommodations you need!

Just yesterday, I went out with my new rollator for the first time (now that I finally live somewhere without stairs!), and I felt so happy and free that even though I just went to a grocery store pharmacy, I had the BEST TIME. I can't run on my own, but with the rollator? I can really move!! I was beaming the whole time!

I even crossed paths with an older woman in my building who was complaining about how embarrassing it was to be the only person with the walker on the floor, and the way that her expression changed when she saw me and when I said how happy I was to have my new walker is something that will stick with me forever! (Her aid worker actually hugged me - it was a magical pharmacy trip, y'all - and my joints feel AMAZING getting exercise I couldn't do without the walker!)

For years now, every time I stand or walk somewhere, being upright has been a matter of calculating how much pain I can take before it is unbearable - mapping out stoops to sit on, places on the ground less likely to be wet from rain, store floors to collapse on - but with my rollator (which I have named Blue Gator the Rollator)??? I SIT THE SECOND I NEED TO, AND WITH THIS POWER I WALKED FURTHER THAN I HAVE IN YEARS.

It brings me immense joy to let people know how important that is, how important their comfort is. To get people to question how much pain and isolation must actually be cultivated and sacrificed on the altar of "move like an abled person"!!

What a badass act of rebellion to say "fuck you I'm getting that goddamn cane and I might get a walker while I'm at it!!!", "fuck you I don't deserve to be in unnecessary pain!!!", "fuck you i don't deserve to be doing constant damage to my joints and nervous system by standing in pain all the time!!!"

Plus, I keep a water bottle and a folding cane (and a phone charger and a notebook) in the little pouch under the rollator seat! (and this time I actually read the safety manual, which everyone should do!)

Okay this got really long (and at some point half the draft got deleted and had to be re-written from memory), but tbh I'm not sorry. I don't know you, but I'm terribly proud of you. Like, the pride fills my chest with warm expanding light when i think of someone coming closer to getting the things they need to thrive.

I hope you get all the accommodations you need and then some more on top of that! You deserve less pain! You deserve to take up space! You deserve to sit with us if you want to! Welcome welcome welcome welcome welcome. ❤

P.S. I actually didn't get any nasty replies to the post itself - I had to change the reply settings on my account because of an unrelated post in which I criticized the queerbaiting in a popular piece of media, and thus was suffering a Deluge of people sliding into the replies to defend the queerbaiting like they were Sherlock/Supernatural fans in the year 2010. 😅 but I am very happy you reached out anyway!!! Thank you again! You made my day!! 🥰🥰🥰

#original #disability #cripple punk #crip punk #cripplepunk #disability advocacy #disability liberation #i might take part of this post and make another shorter post later #who knows! i am a man of mystery! and I'm not even a man! that's how mysterious I am

[mysterious-moonstruck-musings]

I hope dieter isn’t abusing drugs in some way 🥺

Could it maybe be his new medication messing with him? These kind of medication can really fuck someone up if they’re the wrong ones or the wrong dose…

It’s kinda crazy because you wrote all this in a way that makes me not even really mad at dieter. Like I just wanna hug him because he’s so obviously struggling and having a hard time 🥺

Thanks for the ask Anon! I will 100% confirm Dieter is not abusing recreational drugs in this fic! He has given up that habit and isn't lying about it.

More after the cut...

Without spoiling anything (I hope), I will say there is an issue with his medication. There are a few layers to it that I'm not ready to get into yet because it may spoil things. 😉 Honestly, I love to hear that. Our boy deserves the world. People who struggle with mental health issues can't help it. There are so many sides to the issue that not everyone gets to see unless they are directly involved with someone who is affected. I hope that is one thing the readers take away from this fic. Sometimes when someone is being a dick, they don't mean it. They just don't know how else to cope. Thanks for the ask and for sticking with me through this. I hope you are happy with the final result when we finally get there. 💜

#Destiny & Deliverance Series #Talk to me about D & D #Talk to me. #dieter bravo #dieter bravo x oc #dieter bravo fanfiction #dieter bravo fluff #dieter bravo fic #dieter x ofc #the bubble #pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #Pedro Pascal Fanfic #Pedro Pascal Character #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal character fanfic #pedro pascal fic #Pedro Pascal Character Fanfiction #pedro boys

[moshieee-but-evil]

Ok this is in relation to the new rule on my main blog

If you're struggling with mental health issues or are sensitive to certain topics there will be trigger tags so double check if you feel safe enough to read, I tried to water it down as much as I could but still

I don't really want to talk about it but if I don't it's just going to fester in my mind and make me feel awful

I ended up blocking them for my own mental health, and sent them an apology as an ask explaining that it wasn't their fault that I did so

So this is obviously in relation to someone who reached out to me about a very sensitive topic...

I wasn't sure if they could answer it if I had them blocked, so I finally decided to check after a long time of self debating and...

Just here <- that's the apology

I don't want any hate after them they're clearly struggling with something and don't need more on their plate

I thought they would understand my apology but apparently I worded it poorly...

I'm happy to help people but not when it comes at the detriment of my own mental health and I was getting red flags all over when they were talking to me...

The conversation up to the point very much sent guilt tripping vibes, starting by saying something along the lines of "I think everyone hates me" and it just felt more nerve wracking the longer it went on

I don't know if they were aware of that but I couldn't handle it with what I've gone through growing up

They opened up way too easily to someone they didn't even know, maybe they're an inexperienced little kid or not but...

I don't have the full conversation because I kept deleting it in hopes it would stop but I have the message that made me finally decide to block them

Do Not say things like this to strangers. you have no clue what they've gone through and it could just end up hurting both parties

See a professional if you have these problems

I am simply an online person trying to spread positive emotions and have fun with people I care about

Suicide is a very sensitive topic for me, but if you need someone at the time and we're friends YES GO AHEAD I will try my best to help steer you away from self harm and dangerous thoughts, but you also need to go talk to a professional

I cannot stress that enough SEE A PROFESSIONAL ABOUT THESE TOPICS EVEN AFTER YOU FEEL BETTER

AND FUCKING HELL DONT DO THIS TO STRANGERS

#serious post #jfc i know im the therapist friend but im not an actual therapist #and i didn't even know them #tw suicide #tw guilt tripping #i am an extremely empathetic person i do not deserve to feel guilty for not being able to help a stranger #do NOT do this #to anyone

[ilikeyoshi]

me, i'm a stubborn piece of shit who NEEDS to talk my shit out, but who has issues that scare and upset friends Even When they know i won't do anything or hurt anyone. like. a good therapist can just WITHSTAND the raw, vitriolic shit that is human trauma better than any friend, even if that friend literally is also a therapist. i don't think it's POSSIBLE to not be affected when someone you love is telling you how angry/sad/scared they are.

but my best therapists were always the ones that were sympathetic, like a friend would be, while also visibly not daunted by my shit. like. the ones that know feelings =/= morality. the ones that don't shut me down, but help me actually look at the feeling and understand it. and i just don't think you CAN get that with friends, even the bravest ones, because the weird effect of having a good therapist is...

when they're not scared of you, YOU'RE not scared of you. it's surreal, but like, i can tell my therapist the most horrific shit i've experienced, whether from another person or from my mental health, and it's a lot easier (with time! it's not at all immediate; you have to build trust and they have to prove they can handle what you trusting them reveals) because i can't scare her. she knows i'm a good person who doesn't hurt people or break things, even though i have those urges. she knows my feelings aren't my morality; my delusions aren't my morality. what i FEEL, what i THINK and what i DO UNDER THE DURESS OF MENTAL COLLAPSE are not my morality.

and my friends know that too—i hope—but it's hard as fuck to hear a loved one struggling and not be affected. and for me, seeing them affected, that makes everything worse. i don't like scaring or worrying my friends. i don't like asking them to help me through something neither of us are equipped for.

but like. anyway. i'm a stubborn piece of shit who needs to talk it out, so i looked for as long as it took. i got lucky with a couple GOOD therapists first, then i had a SLEW of awful ones. ones that demeaned me for anxiety (yknow, that thing even bad therapists are supposed to be good at), called my past good therapists idiots, treated me like a drug addict (as if that would be warranted or appropriate even if i WAS an addict)—made me question if good therapists EXISTED in bright red states.

and then i found one! and then, when she realized she wasn't equipped for what i was dealing with, she recommended me to an EVEN BETTER ONE.

and like. it's fucking hard. i won't sit here and tell you you definitely won't struggle to find a good one. but i think, if you need to talk, if talking helps you, and especially if talking to your friends makes you feel worse most of the time, you could benefit from a good therapist. and for me, i knew it'd be worth it to find a space i could say All The Shit and finally not scare or worry or affect people.

#yoshi talks