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walnutcookie · 3 months

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sir i humbly request rambles about misfortune and more cappuccino hcs

perhaps some body horror doodles as well if you feel comfortable

i adore this au please spill your guts to me and i will feed on the titbits i find

also may i make fanart of this misfortune au thing (sorry not sure what to call it)

misfortune moment PART THREE!!!! ramble under cut :]

part one here

part two here

rbs ok!

misfortune knows exactly how to inflict the most amount of misery in someone.

heres the thing. if it just kept beating its host while theyre down, the host would eventually grow a tolerance to the pain and simply become numb. that means that it cant get any more misery out of its host and it would have to find another one.

So! it allows the host some joy. In cappuccinos case, it primarily involves his vacations :]c before she actually knows what causes all of the bad things in his life she just knew that Everything was always bad and miserable unless she was relaxing. while she was working, things would constantly injure her, nothing would stay organized, and bad things just kept happening one after another, but on vacation everything seemed to be just fine!! Great even! shes just able to surf or relax or nap and just ENJOY things instead of being hit by falling lights and bookshelves. even though every car shes ever been in has crashed hes always been safe on planes. of course its not all sunshine and rainbows because she can hardly even enjoy the break when he cant stop thinking about how AWFUL its going to be to go back to work

BUT!! the point is that her days off are like the ONLY times that he finds peace. Which is partially why hes so eager to catch another break!!! misfortune lets her have these lovely days but also uses it as an opportunity to make bad things happen during/right before her breaks so that theyre cancelled or cut short and shes filled with disappointment<3

this is also why it let langue into cappuccinos life ! of course it could EASILY just kill them but cappuccino was already getting a little too miserable and was far too adjusted to all of the bad luck in his life already so langue was the perfect solution to that problem. And also created misery all on their own like the longing cappuccino feels before they actually get together. And now that cappuccino has langue in her life and theyre someone who makes her so happy misfortune is able to cause harm to them/mess with cappuccino's plans of meeting them and just cause more distress :]c

of course that plan backfired when langue managed to weaken it and make cappuccino's life decent enough to the point it was forced to leave OOPS!!!!

but yeah ,,, i dont know i just love messing with this thang. too much misfortune is bad because then the host will adapt so it has to be a little lenient so the person doesnt feel completely and utterly hopeless >:] and in the event that the host does become useless to it then it simply posesses them to commit crimes and just cause misery to other people than the host before exiting the body and leaving it to bleed out and die

OKAY WHOOPEEE thats all i have to talk about right now i hope this is at least somewhat cohesive im kindof tired right now . BUT WOO RAVEN TIME!!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS ASK IT WAS SO SO FUN TO DRAW ANS ANSWER /GEN AGHH hope you enjoy the drawings as much as i enjoyed making them X] ill likely put them in a seperate post since im really proud of the first one and i kind of want it to be in a post of its own agahsbfkhf

ALSO IVE ALREADY ANSWERED THIS BUT YESS ABSOLUTELY !!! I WOJLD ABSPLUTELY LOVE TO SEE FANART AUAGHHFF <333 YOU ARE SO SWEET !!!

if anyone has any further questions/comments feel free to shoot me an ask ! X]

#cappuccino cookie #cookie run #cookie run au #my art #🎉 rambles #tw blood #tw body horror #blood #body horror

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idyllic-affections · 11 months

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HELLO!! YOUR BAIZHU WITH CHRONICALLY ILL READER IS THE BEST THING THAT'S EVERY HAPPENED!!! I've never seen a blog that does only platonic things, and as an aroace person, IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY! I wasn't too sure if you requests were open or not, but I was wondering if you could make either some headcanons or a fic where the reader (from that series) has a flare up or gets sick and Baizhu takes care of them? I'm unfortunately sick right now (just in time for when my final school assignments are due, slay 😍) but found family and hurt/comfort are literally the best thing ever, and, if put together, I'm pretty sure will cure me /j. If you requests aren't open, then please disregard this message!

Anyway, I gotta go sleep before the fever messes up my brain (if it hasn't already); so good bye, and thank you again!!

a slip of the tongue.

summary. how does baizhu care for his junior herbalist when they fall ill?

trigger & content warnings. flu-like sickness, lighthearted mentions of death.

tropes, pairings, fic length, & other notes. hurt/comfort-ish. baizhu & reader. 1.1k words. they/them pronouns for reader. this post is an expansion of invisible disability? it's rather visible to me & contains vaguely implied spoilers for baizhu's story quest.

author's thoughts. hello lovely!!! thank youu <3 i am slowly collecting people that like this series like how i collect shiny rocks. its great to get a request related to it. i hold this series very dearly, so please (and this goes for everyone reading this!) never be shy to send thoughts about it or requests related to it. anyway, i love catering to aroace folk, you all are so special to me. im on the aro spectrum myself, so i get it. i know from experience that it can be super frustrating looking for fanfic content that's non-romantic. please remember to take care of yourself! i totally understand the feeling of needing to finish final assignments while being sick. me and you are in the exact same boat LMAO... my requests are always open btw! ive no intention of ever closing them. in the end, i went with our poor reader being sick rather than having flare ups, since i already briefly touched on that idea in employee benefits.

how does baizhu care for his junior herbalist when they're sick and out of commission?

baizhu is most often the first to know when they're sick or otherwise unwell. he's so impossibly attentive to their bodily condition, simply because their health is partially his responsibility. he's their teacher. what kind of mentor would neglect to take care of their apprentice? a bad one, that's what kind.

(he also feels somewhat indebted to them—even though they're chronically ill, they're always doing anything they can to help him recover after his "secret art" treatments. even though he's the doctor, they've helped care for him on more than one occasion. he has to return the favor whenever he can. just because he's older doesn't mean he gets to freely take advantage of their kindness.)

if he's not the first to know, he's the second, because the only instance where he wouldn't know first is if they woke up ill at home.

he'll always end up being the second to know, at the very least. someone will inform him of their condition, whether that be a parent or a sibling or another family member. sometimes a friend of theirs may tell him, such as xingqiu, chongyun, hu tao, or xiangling.

in hu tao's case... she may be distrustful of him, but she does tell him when they aren't well. [name] is a childhood friend of hers. she cares about their health and, surprisingly, doesn't want to put them in the ground just yet!

even though she dreads the path they've chosen to walk down... she still cares for them, very much so.

(junior herbalist!reader's lore drop is finally here?!?!?)

regardless of how baizhu finds out, they'll end up being cared for at the pharmacy.

though he could prescribe them medication and let them be taken care of at home...

he often wants to care for them himself.

gui has asked why in the past, and baizhu really has never had a good answer for him.

he's really not sure why he wants to be the one to monitor them. perhaps it's because it gives him a sense of calmness and reassures him that they're recovering well.

after all, if their condition were to rapidly decline for any reason... he could fix it.

(to some others, his concern might seem overprotective. unnecessary. however, something as simple as the flu has been known to take lives. he worries that, because of their chronic illness, they may be more susceptible to a severe case than others are.)

he has the means to save them if something like that were to happen, and undoubtedly, the life of his sweet and kind apprentice is one that deserves to be saved and protected.

perhaps it's also because it seems to put qiqi at ease; baizhu's noticed that she gets fidgety in [name]'s absence during work hours, but when they're ill and being cared for at the pharmacy, she functions very well and often even remembers to check on them herself.

sometimes when they have a fever, qiqi may sit by their side for minutes at a time and just press her little cold hands on their forehead to cool them off. she also ensures that they stay hydrated.

both baizhu and gui find this behavior very endearing. qiqi cares deeply for her big sibling (despite the fact that she's technically older...). her bond with them is something very special and sweet to bear witness to.

bubu pharmacy's work environment is familial and tightly knit by nature, so it isn't too hard to imagine that something would feel wrong if one of the four herbalists were gone for whatever reason. even those who don't work there are affected by the absence of one or more of the pharmacists.

overall, baizhu takes very good care of them when they fall ill.

he monitors them closely, hand-crafts their medicine depending on what they need, makes sure that their fluid intake is maintained...

he dotes on them tbh.

"Ugh..." they groaned, blearily blinking up at their mentor. Baizhu's hand against the feverish skin of their forehead was cold; they couldn't help but lean into the gentle touch. "Bàba?"

He didn't point it out. He hardly even acknowledged their words, as if he were somehow used to it. He only smiled, hand stroking tenderly over their disheveled hair, taming the defiant strands no doubt caused by restless sleep. "So sorry to wake you, dear."

Even Changsheng was quiet—she only hummed thoughtfully from her place around Baizhu's neck. Normally, she'd find something to tease them about (usually because they started it!), but now... she seemed to know that it just wasn't right to tease them in their hazy state of mind.

Gui was quiet, too. He was surprised. He had never heard them address their mentor such an... informal way, let alone with familial terms. He did once briefly think that the dynamic they had with Baizhu was awfully family-like, but...

It was still unexpected.

"Come, now. It's time to take your medicine again, and then you can go back to sleep, okay?"

Gui watched, still silent, as they hummed in absentminded acknowledgement, rubbing their eyes ever so slightly. It didn't seem to help them come to at all; their gaze was still distant and unfocused and they didn't even realize how they addressed the doctor. If they did... they'd probably apologize, embarrassed, but they showed no such emotion. Baizhu gently guided them into a sitting position, rubbing small circles on their back.

Gui handed the cup filled about halfway with herbal medication off to the doctor. Baizhu gingerly guided it to their lips, knowing very well that the guidance was needed; they looked half-asleep sitting up. Archons know they were in no condition to successfully do it themselves. They took the medicine without so much as a whine about its bitterness—they only grimaced slightly after swallowing. Gui supposed that they never really were one to complain about it, even when fully coherent. 'I think it would set a bad example for others if I complained,' they once told him. 'Plus, it's not like Dr. Baizhu gets some kind of sadistic pleasure from giving medication to me, so there's no reason to complain. It's herbal. There's nothing to be done about the taste... I know he doesn't like taking it either. Hehe. It's kind of funny, actually, like we're hiding some kind of company secret. Herbalists who don't like the taste of herbal medicine.'

It was only after he left the room with the doctor that he pointed it out:

"They called you bàba."

"Hm?" Baizhu hummed, turning to Gui. "Oh. Yes... [Name] has done it quite a few times, actually, whether that be because of fever delirium or a slip of the tongue. I don't mind it. It only means that they feel safe enough to be vulnerable here. Qiqi has done it a few times, as well. Those two are only children, so... it is to be expected."

Gui then smiled, nodding. "It's cute."

Baizhu couldn't help but agree, his lips tilting upwards into a little smile himself. "It is."

please consider reblogging, it helps me out quite a lot!

#aphelion's headcanons 🌸#: [ the junior herbalist! 🌸 ]#favoniuslibrary #astronetwrk #platonic genshin impact x reader #platonic genshin #platonic genshin impact #platonic genshin x reader #platonic baizhu x reader #baizhu x reader #genshin impsct x reader

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kheprriverse · 2 months

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You have to stop making such amazing art. Tumblr is so restricting I can’t possibly reblog it enough /lh But alas. Words also have meaning, right?

Be warned: I may not make any sense because I’m tired <3

Your art is literally so. Inspiring though. Your style is so beautiful and pretty and it’s just somehow— It makes me want to create? Honestly. I’d love to have a style like yours, but also I’m happy with mine! So instead, the inly valid thing to do is EAT YOUR ART AND REBLOG SO MANY TIMES!!! I’m keeping my own style, and building off it: While you and other artists do the same with what you do!

That being said. Your art just makes my day sometimes. Seeing you post gives me such joy and anytime I see the stupid silly (Cedar /Affec) it’s an instant giggling and kicking my feet like a feral child. So much stimming happens, and I literally love every design and thing you come up with. It’s just. Woah <3

My want to eat art is always at a 10/10: Let me consume the heckin heckles out of everything. Like. shredding the entire walls up. Such zoomies from art. Everything about your art most times just feels. Soft and cozy. Makes it feel like home sometimes and probably tastes like. Fluff. (That’s not a taste but whatever. It counts in my brain?) Maybe even like some sweet candy or dish, idek. Tastes aren’t tasting but damn art does arting?

Not only are you a cool and amazing talented artist, you’re also such a cool person beyond that and just so sweet I would just like to hug, yknow? Strangely I feel like I should be like. Somewhat intimidated because COOL PERSON ARTIST WOAH YOU INTERACT WITH ME??!? But also, I’m not… Really that intimidated? I don’t know, feel welcoming, just like the feeling yoir art brings and its just. Comforting?

You and your silly goody personality is so amazing and you’re so talented, I’m gonna flee now back into the ground: Hopefully this made somewhat sense— And that you have a lovely week/day/month— Just time in general!

*descends away*

~ Z

No I won't stop! Only pretty designs and silly guys ✨! (I am also very tired so its all okay. Also apologies if you wanted this answered privately.)

Also I'm gonna cry abkvjadbvjkkdvbad /pos This means so much! I'm very bad with explaining how I feel but I'm gonna try my bets lmao. It makes me so happy to hear that people really like my stuff, AND think I'm a cool person! I want my space to be kinda chill, friendly, etc and I'm very glad that so far I've been doing a pretty good job :'D

tysm again! I'm very glad u like my stuff (and think I'm cool). I woke up a few hours ago with a headache, dizziness, and was just generally feeling kinda bad and couldn't go back to sleep. But seeing this ask has so far made my day 100 times better! I hope the space I provide continues to bring joy (or just general silliness) to you and others <3

(also I'm glad you like my art too. Ive been having weird issues looking @ my own art since December, which I've never had before, so it makes me become a little silly whenever I get a comment on it. Really improves my motivation and lot and helps me continue what I love most: drawing funny guys and beasties :>)

#anon #z anon #kheprriask #tysm for like the millionth time #also maybe almost started crying this morning?? its good dw #just makes me rly happy to hear this <3

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ovaruling · 3 months

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Hi sorry if this is quite a full on ask and you can answer it as much or as little as you want. I just wondered how do you process feelings of despair and hopeless about animal suffering caused by humans (whether direct or indirect)?

I'm finding I'm struggling a lot with it at the moment (I've always had anxious disposition but since becoming vegan 2 years ago it's become hyper focused on animals) I volunteered at a local small animal rescue quite intensely for a year but burnt out doing that, however at least it was somewhat in my control. When I read about animal suffering further afield (for example your post about the trapped animals in Palestine) where I know about it but can't do anything about it (or feel like I can't) I can't stop thinking about it. Like I could be in the middle of my day at work and suddenly think 'there is a cat starving to death right now with no escape' and I imagine how it feels to them and I feel paralyzed.

I give regular monthly donations to a couple of international animal charities. Becoming vegan was one way of making me feel in control about animal suffering (in that I'm no longer a direct contributor to it - at least I hope not) but it's also a reason for also feeling out of control - I am one person and animals are suffering everywhere. I will never not be vegan I just wish I could control my feelings so they don't overwhelm my life.

I've tried articulating my thoughts to a couple of (non-vegan) friends and they don't get it and they think I'm distressed about all animal suffering (a gazelle being eaten by a lion for example) The thing is, that doesn't "upset" me because that is the animal kingdom. That is life. What humans have done and are doing to animals is beyond disgusting and inexcusable. A lion eating a gazelle for food is in no way comparable.

I don't know if this ask is making any sense or just a rambling mess of thoughts. Anyway, keep doing what you're doing for animals and feminism. Thanks for reading (if you made it this far!)

hi there! before i answer anything i just want to let you know that you and i are in the same boat—i 100% struggle with those same exact feelings every day of my life. i just want you to know going into this answer that you’re not alone!

(also i hope you’re ok with me publishing this—i would normally answer this privately but it’s a question i think a lot of vegans out there would really relate to. if you’re uncomfortable with it being public, pls let me know and i’ll delete ❤️)

the short answer is: i don’t know. i truly have no idea how to cope with it, and it’s a very deep pain that plagues me mercilessly. i already have really bad OCD, i have my whole life, and the thing ive had THE most anxiety and compulsive reaction to is animal suffering… particularly the knowledge that even the horrifying things i read about from sanctuaries aren’t even the worst things happening out there.

the knowledge that the cruelest, most sickening animal abuse i could ever imagine has probably happened, is probably happening somewhere on earth now as i think it.

and i know you know how far down that tunnel goes in the imagination—imagine the worst torture a human could subject an animal to, and it’s probably been done. and probably to even worse degrees than we even have the capacity to imagine, too.

it’s honestly the main reason i have always struggled with sleep, with anxiety, with panic, with stress, with severe and wholly untreatable depression. it is The thing that truly makes this world unlivable to me.

i break down regularly to my partner and to friends and family, but i know they either don’t get it or don’t get it on the level i’m feeling it. even many so-called animal activists consider animals to be lesser than humans in some way shape or form. it’s a very lonely movement to be in sometimes.

i have some wonderful vegan friends online who i talk to and vent to and it helps a bit to know that they understand, at least.

and the volunteering and the protesting i’ve been doing has helped me feel more in tune with the movement, but it’s also opened up more opportunities for me to see the horrors. it’s very, very difficult sometimes. there are days when i hardly speak a word to anyone at all because i just feel so desolate and lost. to see so much cruelty, to know it’s happening, to know im powerless against it… to see my friends and family enjoying the products of that cruelty without a single thought about how much pain and suffering went into it… it’s very, very disillusioning.

i’m ngl, it’s even brought me deeper into suicidal feelings. there are days when i really don’t think i can go on. days when i think i can’t stand another moment of this timeline where such evil things happen to the only true innocents on this earth and that not only do so few people care, most of them violently defend their right to do it.

the closest i’ve come to coping is attending protests with my local animal rights activism group. it feels so good to be among people who get it, and among experienced activists who have the confidence to go toe-to-toe with even the most abrasive and idiotic of opponents on the street and hold others accountable for animal cruelty. it makes me feel, for a little while, hopeful to see the passion to do the right thing alive and well in others.

volunteering at sanctuaries is rewarding, it really is, i wouldn’t trade it, but i think the protests are where i find the most stability. it’s enough to keep me sane and standing.

if you have no local group of activists, then i recommend seeking community with online vegans who are vegan for the animals and not for “weaker” reasons like personal health or the environment (reasons that prioritize humans).

there’s tumblr, instagram, discord… even facebook (ik). it’s worth finding others who have the fighting spirit, who have the courage to keep going even in the face and knowledge of such horrific cruelty.

it also helps to watch videos of prominent and well-spoken activists like Joey Carbstrong or Paul Bashir. i feel a lot better about things after i watch Joey’s street outreach videos. it helps me re-center to watch those confrontations and then scroll through the comments to see how many of us there are out there, fighting on the right side of history.

and then there’s me :) i am always happy to make a new vegan friend! my dm’s are open and if you’d like to exchange discords or instagram urls just lmk. we’ve got to have each other’s backs—it’s a really rough time out here for vegan feminists. we see double the hypocrisy and cruelty and we are carrying so many horrors in our awareness.

please don’t hesitate to come to me and chat and vent! as i said, i know exactly what it’s like to be affected by this knowledge and feel so powerless. it’s a very dark place to be in and it’s always better with company.

also any other vegan feminists who see this, pls rally and reply so we can see each other and find each other! ❤️

#v #vp

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oekaki-chan · 2 years

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hi clef!! i first stumbled upon your art on twitter via a comic tutorial you posted. i finally decided play AA a month ago and remembered about your art and thankfully found your account again. After also finding your tumblr,, its just. wow. going through people's art tags is always a journey, especially when theres stuff in it that are older than a decade, haha. i just wanna say that your improvement over time motivates me to keep drawing, as ive been recently studying forms and shapes in other people's art, and yours is definitely one of the best examples. As im taking a gap year to work on a portfolio for college, i finally had the proper opportunity to start studying art as i wanted.

i mainly wanted to ask- when drawing, what types of references do you use for character poses? they always seem really natural but also have that "homemade feeling"- as in applied really well into an art style. The way you draw expressions is also really immaculate! I was wondering (if its alright with you), whether if you have tips on that too?

thank you regardless, and i hope you have a great day!

I hope this doesn't come off as bragging because honestly when I'm drawing poses I almost never use references 😭💦 During my art journey I conditioned myself to draw without references because my parents didn't allow me to have internet access until I went to high school, it was hard to get references for drawing so it was mostly just "frick around and see what happens", I just tried to project whatever I have in mind into the canvas 😂 Instead of training my eyeballing skill, I ended up training my muscle memory and the way I imagine poses in my head (that's why I'm a bit bad with realism drawing because I have bad eyeballing and real-time observation skills).

I do use references sometimes when the pose is a bit hard to get because it has many foreshortenings and hidden parts like this Diavolo doodle I made, but I studied the reference instead of tracing it so I can get a better gist of how things work in case I'll need to draw the same pose again in the future. (Also I hate that whenever I try to find some references for a specific pose google suggested me porn sites instead zzzz)

But I'm not saying using references is wrong, not at all 😭!! It's just my way of drawing! I'm lazy and get distracted easily once I'm scrolling the internet pages, it's also why I don't usually use 3D models in CSP because trying to get the right pose with that may take a while and the outcome isn't really worth the time because it often looks stiff, weightless, and unnatural.

And same goes for expressions! I think being a (somewhat) avid manga reader extends my visual library for expression (and um, I think drawing steamy stuff helps too because you can practice drawing exaggerated expressions and poses, just make sure you're not drawing the same type of expression and pose/angle over and over 😳💦)

I hope this helps and I'm sorry it got a bit long 😭😭!!

#ask #tutorial

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minaharkers · 11 months

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OC TAG GAME ｡*･♡;

tagged by @aragorngf to categorize my ocs and make them in this picrew by crowsen!!

♡ FAVORITE OC. (At the moment)

Lukas Warren — Fallout: New Vegas

This was cruel to make me pick between all of my kids but I think Lukas at the moment is always kicking around my head — my sweet boy my poor little meow meow. I have so much in my head about his relationship with his family both the complicated horror story that is his family and his adopted ghoul mom Majorie and how much that really shaped his worldview <3

♡ NEWEST OC.

Caroline Clarke — Various

Cara my beloved!! She’s my OC for a post-apocalyptic RP group I’m in and I love her sm <3 She’s a hunter from West Virginia who’s still trying to getting used to living in a (somewhat) civilized part of Boston after living in the literal Appalachian woods for a solid three years with her brother. I’m excited to write with her more !! She’s a sweet person but is still sort of closed off after so much has happened

♡ OLDEST OC.

Aerie — The Elder Scrolls V: Skryim

Aerie is definitely one of my oldest ocs!! Skyrim was really one of the first rpgs I played and honestly I feel like she’s both gone through so many iterations but also stayed pretty consistent!! We love a wild girlie who the universe had to make her a short nord to balance out the whole dragon soul thing

♡ MEANEST OC.

Ethan Warren — Fallout: New Vegas

Some people deal with their issues in all sorts of ways; Ethan decided to deal with it by razing his hometown to the ground <3 Having his father be burned instead of crucified like the Legion normally would to not give him the satisfaction of dying like jesus is understandable given what an awful person Richard Warren was, but joining the Legion and staying for years is a bad move maybe 🤔

♡ SOFTEST OC.

Merethel Lavellan — Dragon Age: Inquisition

This was tough between Merethel and Ophelia but I think he’s someone who’s got a quiet compassion to him. The role of inquisitor does chafe on him a lot with him being more comfortable behind the scenes and being with people one on one as a healer. But I think people tend to underestimate how intelligent he is at first with his gentle nature, because he definitely learns how to play the “game” of politics in his own right by the time of Trespasser (even if he is very eager to get rid of the Inquisitor title).

♡ MOST ALOOF/STANDOFFISH OC.

Endaryn Ravel — The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind

Even before he lost his place at the Arcane University in Cyrodiil after being booted to Morrowind because the Emperor Said So (rip 😔) , Endaryn is someone who just wants to be left alone to study!! And stuff KEEPS happening to him and he just wants to finish his thesis can he please stop getting weird dream messages from Dagoth Ur

♡ DUMBEST (AFFECTIONATE) OC.

Leondas Vendicci — The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion

It’s not that he’s dumb, he just lacks any and all self-preservation or self-respect! <3 Jk, but Leondas is definitely the guy who acts first and thinks about it later when he realizes the consequences. A fuck around and find out kind of guy, you might say. But yeah, definitely the type to run into Oblivion portals without much of a plan. But he’s MY favorite dumbass so it’s okay

♡ SMARTEST OC.

Ophelia Faye — Fallout: 3

WOMEN! IN! STEM! Ophelia’s definitely the most intelligent; (I did actually give her a 10 in her Intelligence SPECIAL score). But I would say it’s pretty much all like science and medicine based intellect, and she’s the most comfortable in a lab or med bay than out in the Wasteland.

♡ OC YOU’D LIKE TO BE FRIENDS WITH IRL.

Euurydia Daeron — Star Wars: The Old Republic

I have NO idea if Dia and I would actually hang out IRL but she’d be the most fun to hang out with. She’s the perfect extrovert to adopt an introvert like me and talk my ear off and convince me to try one drink and suddenly it’s 2 am and we’ve been cantina hopping in the Lower Promenade on Nar Shaddaa for hours

tagging: @statichvm @chuckhansen @denerims @indorilnerevarine @risingsh0t @leviiackrman @florbelles @unholymilf @fashionablyfyrdraaca

#this was so fun!!! thank you for tagging me #ocs #oc: lukas #oc: caroline #oc: aerie #oc: ethan #oc: merethel #oc: endaryn #oc: leondas #oc: ophelia #oc: dia

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autism-corner · 1 year

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Convenient Trouble, Levi x reader smut

It was the only way to achieve what he wanted. There’s no way that Levi could actually just directly approach you or anything. No, he’s way too much of a loser for that. So, to get what he’s been so desperately dreaming of, it had to look like an accident. It had to look like something went unfortunately wrong. That’s the only way to get things right.

Here he is. The moment of truth. All his brothers had left the house, only leaving you and him for a surprising amount of time. His plan was laid out, alongside the rope he’d need. This was the only way Levi would get you to be his.

(I realise it might look like he’s going to kill himself. He is not don’t worry =w=b Its just the good ol' 'whoopsie ive tied myself up in a sexual way teehee thats so silly lol')

II Top Reader II AMAB Reader II you/yours pronouns II 2,200 Words II Trans Levi II Also posted on AO3!! II

It’s one of the few peaceful days in the house of Lamentation. All the nuisances have left the building and the only two current occupants were both holed up in their rooms. You took this quiet day to watch a movie you’ve been looking forward to.

It had only been a few minutes before your watching was interrupted. A call from Leviathan? Now you’re curious. Levi is the last brother to call unnecessarily, so something must be really amiss. Quickly you press the button.

“Levi, are you okay?” you nearly scream. Despite his distant character, you’ve really grown to care about him. Maybe a little more than you’d like.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I mean. Somewhat.” You feel relieved. He doesn’t sound like he’s in too much distress. His voice sounds a lot more nervous than panicked. “You see, like…” A breath. He needed to take this slow, and you knew not to interrupt. “So you know in Season 4 of Ruri-chan there’s an episode where this bad guy that has kidnapped Azuki-tan and Ruri-chan goes to save her and to have enough time to untie Azuki-tan Ruri-chan actually ties up the bad guy so he won’t interfere and she does so successfully and they both make it out and so this rope that she used to tie up the bad guy is actually pink with little flowers all over it so it’s like a real Ruri-chan rope and now they’ve released it as merch. And so I had to get it. But now I’m stuck.”

These were the most words you ever heard Levi say. How passionate can this guy get about a kids show? Although, you have to admit, it’s kind of endearing. Wait. He’s stuck?

“You’re stuck?” He lets out a whine. “Please don’t laugh at me. I was just excited and it got all b-bungled up. I know im a good-for-nothing otaku, but could you p-please come help me?” God, it sounded like he was on the verge of tears. You smiled, “Of course I'll come help you Levi. I’m on my way.” He exhaled with relief. “Good! You know, the newest episode from ‘Help, I Have A Crush But No Idea How To Approach Him So I Tied Myself Up And He Had To Help Me’ begins airing soon and I absolutely cannot miss that, so you better hurry.” You laughed, responded with a simple “I will.” and hung up. For how much of an introvert he is, this sure is a very direct method.

— Upon entering the room, it was clear what kind of predicament Levi had gotten himself into. And gotten himself into it he had, because there’s no plausible way for that to have happened by accident. He was on the floor with his face near the ground, arms and legs bound to his torso and ass clearly presented in the air.Ofcourse his ass was pointed directly at the entrance, both granting you a beautiful view, with the added bonus that Levi couldn’t catch you staring.

The way the rope wound over and under Levi’s legs, arms and stomach made it possible for him to be entirely picked up by one hand. He looked pathetic and helpless, and the bright red colour on his face didn’t help.

“Ah! You came!” He must have heard the door, because you’d been just standing there, taking it all in. The way his aquarium reflected a soft blue light everywhere made it look that much more heavenly. You close the door behind you, and turn the knob to lock. Slowly you approach your stuck prey, who’s silently sweating away. With the way his face is pressed against the floor, his vision is extremely limited. He tries to listen to your approach, but still lets out a surprised yelp when he feels your hand on his head.

“Poor little lamb. Levi dear, how could you have possibly ended up in this situation? You know, I’m really starting to think this isn’t that much of an accident.” You smiled and watched as his cheeks got just a little more vibrant. “NO! I swear to you this wasn’t on purpose! I’m so sorry you have to see a gross pervert otaku like this I shouldn't have even started this I knew it’d be bad. But it was an accident! I’m telling you!!”

You kneel next to him, trying to look him in the eyes, while he’s actively avoiding yours. You don’t know Levi all that well, but it’s very clear that this is a played up innocent act. The way he’s biting back his smile and the way his eyes are glistening can’t be a coincidence. Debating how to handle this situation, you continue.

“Hm. Well, if that’s how you want to play it.” Levi’s eyes finally meet yours, and the mutual understanding is immediately clear.

You switch up your attitude, now that you know there is a joint goal.

“Levi dear, how could I possibly help you? I mean. Look at the predicament you’re in.” Your voice is filled with fake concern and a bit of amusement. Standing up, you take another good look at him. There are only a few knots, reachable by Levi’s own hands. He could’ve easily come out if he wanted to. He is still on all fours, ass high up in the air. The only thing that has changed since you’ve come in is the way his legs are positioned, now slightly more spread than natural.

“You know what I think?” Your hands find his ass, and god do they feel divine. It really was a shame he always wears that long-ass cloak.

You get on your knees behind him, and bend over to whisper in his ear. “We might need to remove the clothes you have, just to make some space between the rope and your body. Do you mind?” Patiently you wait for his response. Levi really isn’t a guy that talks much when he’s in these situations, but it’s not like you mind. You just need a quick actually verbal confirmation. “Baby? I am going to need a response, darling.” He whimpers.

“I- I didn’t expect it to go this well. Please just do whatever you want! I want to be in your complete mercy!” He cries out. You place a quick kiss on his ear. “That surely can be arranged, don’t you worry pretty.”

Getting up again, eager to finally start the action, your eyes notice the convenient ways some of the rope is bound. It seems that there’s been successfully left just enough space for Levi’s pants to be pulled down. How favourable.

Deciding to keep teasing him for a bit, you snake your hand between his legs and cup his sex. You didn’t exactly find the dick that you were expecting, but his pussy felt wet and soft and you couldn’t wait to delve in. The small gasp he let out only encouraged you.

He seemed to be just as turned on as you, slightly wet through his pants. To let him know just how much you were enjoying him, you press your hard-on against him, causing Levi to let out a harsh moan. While he doesn’t like talking that much, you have a feeling he is rather vocal. Which only means you’ll want to try your hardest to hear all of Levi’s delicious little noises.

With one hand on his hip and the other slowly playing with his front, you begin to move your hips as well. Levi is whining and struggling underneath you, desperately trying to get any more friction he can get.

Deciding you’ve both been tormented enough, you pull down Levi’s pants and underwear as far as they can go. It’s something you’ve been dreaming of seeing, and it’s a great deal better than you’ve hoped. Round cheeks with freckles sprinkled here and there, and a surprisingly wellkept grooming situation. Given the state of his usual hygiene, you were certainly not about to complain.

“It sure looks like someone came prepared.” His hole was clearly stretched already. Finally being able to touch his actual skin, you reach for his clit. While he’s trembling beneath you, letting out soft groans and moans, you reach down to undo your own pants.

Levi is ready, spread open all for you. His holes are beautifully exposed, his cries steadily growing louder. Still slowly rubbing his tiny dick, the hand on Levi slowly moves downwards, inching to his precious warmth. Your other hand is leisurely stroking your own dick, preparing it for what’s to come.

Your fingers have reached Levi’s hole, and are now slowly prodding at the entrance. Finally having gained the courage by Levi’s lavish voice, you push in two fingers at once. It looks like Levi had been playing with his bits for quite some time already, since there was barely any resistance. Hearing him moan loudly only reinsured your ideas.

The soft feeling of him surrounding you was already heavenly, and the best was yet to come. Thanks to the way Levi was still desperately grinding against both your hand and erection, you knew time was running low. So, reckoning Levi is prepared enough by both your and his previous preparations, you decide to dive in. You remove your fingers from his hole, making him let out a desperate sob. The hand moves up to his hips, still delightfully positioned due to the ropes. You guide your dick to his hole, and without warning, push in.

The way Levi squeals out is something that you will always remember. It began low and rumbling, quickly rising in volume and tone once he realised you were actually, properly inside him. That first embrace, combined with Levi all packed up for you, truly felt like heaven. Giving some time for Levi to adjust, you bend over his body again. “God, you feel so good like this, Levi.” You let out a groan. “So perfect and pretty, only for me right?” His only responses are small wails and shrieks, apparently already to fucked out to answer. Deciding it’s certainly been long enough, you finally begin to move.

Getting up again, both your hands grasp a firmer grip on his hips. You begin with slowly thrusting halfway in and out, but after just a few smacks you cave in. Levi had explicitly said to use him however you please, so why should you even have to be careful? Your movement becomes quicker, the sound of the smacks making a beautiful symphony alongside Levi’s moans.

The way his body moves in response to yours is mesmerizing, so limited by the rope but all to free against his tiled floor. He made a good choice to bind his confinements in a way that still leaves a layer of cloth between him and the cold hard ground. Your performance leaves his body making small shocks, and he is both propelled by your thrusts yet contained by the firm hands still on his hips. The way your momentum is constantly hitting him in the middle of his breaths makes his yelps sound that much better. Every time you hit his spot, his noises become more angelic. There’s no doubt as to why he might have fallen.

While you’re continuing to ravage his body, the small pressure in your stomach keeps growing. When you notice it slipping past the point of return, you quickly place your hand lower, to start playing with Levi’s clit again. Somehow, Levi begins to let out words again. “Please..” he moans. “Fuck me. Fuck me. Fuck me.” His voice starts hiccuping and it’s clear that he too, is close. Gathering the very few thoughts you have still left, you respond.

“Yeah baby? Do you want me to fuck you full?” He returns quickly, with the loudest voice you’ve ever heard out of him “Yeah fuck!” You join him with his moans, his walls tightening around you, wanting to pull you even closer. “Fuck me full daddy please I’m so close. Please fill me up. I need you right now.”

Although you would love to focus on the things Levi’s continuing to babble out, you feel his peak coming in. He shakes and clenches around you, pulling you over as well. It’s delicious, and you wish to experience this over and over again. You continue to thrust and fuck him roughly, getting both of you trough your respective climax, while filling him to the brim.

Getting down from the high, you slowly pull out. The string of your release keeps you connected for a bit, before splitting and dripping on the ground. Gross. You really need to clean both of you off. Still half-dazed, you go to check on Levi. His tongue is rolled out, drool making a little puddle on the floor. His eyes are closed and if you wouldn’t know better, he might have fallen asleep. Poor thing. You pick him up, and slowly you begin to untie his creation.

How he managed all of this in the first place, is something you’ll have to ask him later. Currently, the only thing that matters is him curled up in his bath with you, lazily and with a surprisingly confident manner, talking about his feelings for you. A proper confession was really due, after all.

#obey me #obey me smut #obey me leviathan #obey me levi #obey me leviathan smut #obey me male reader #obey me bottom leviathan #obey me x reader #leviathan x reader #obey me leviathan x reader #nsfnr #my work #sillyposting #ftm levi #nothing deep he just has a pussy =w=b #x reader

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stitchwraith-stingers · 7 months

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i wanna infodump abt my fnaf au but i also like being silly

so im gonna do it in the style of an aita post and make u guess who the pov character is (bonus points if u manage to guess the others too)

AITA for not telling a kid i knew has a deep crush on me that im not interested?

I (17FTM) am a survivor of a horrific incident at a local pizzeria, i was 9 at the time and it was my birthday, it all started great, i invited all my friends there,

and one of them (9M) happen to have a crush on me, i knew abt it, everyone does but i just wasnt interested in him that way but i also dont want to broke his heart or stop being friends with him so i said nothing at first, but worst of all he confessed his love for me out loud at my party, it was extremely awkward and idk how to respond so i just said "we're a little too young for that rn so maybe later" and i think he might've got the wrong message cuz he seem to be rly happy and giddy and said "of course, I'll wait"

party goes as normal until i notice some of my close friends arent there but i chuck it out as just them going home early, that assumption was rly stupid because i later on saw a man in a bunny costume approach me and the kid who had a crush on me saying he has a special surprise for us,

this was rly stupid, i was rly stupid, i shouldn't have followed a stranger without my parents because after i followed the man to a room, i saw the worst thing ive ever laid my eyes upon,

some of my closest friends (2 of them 9M, the other one 7F) dead on the ground with blood everywhere, before we can get out, the man already locked the door and i cowardly run and hide inside a spare yellow bear suit while i watch the kid who confessed to me be killed right infront of me

i wont get into much detail because i hate remembering how it felt being so scared and trapped inside that bear but i miraculously survived this whole thing, my family even moved for a long time before i have to go back to the town where the incident took place, but i have a smidge feeling of unease in my stomach for my dead friends and especially that kid, i feel like they're still here somewhere waiting for me, and i even made a somewhat promise to that kid, i feel so bad to not be more open abt my feelings to him but at least he's a bit happy before he was offed, that doesn't sound right but idk how to make that sound right

idk this whole event was extremely traumatic for me, i still have nightmares surrounding this event and i swear to god ever since i moved back that old pizzeria is inviting me, luring me inside, and just as a whole felt like i have unfinished business with it

AITA?

charlie fnaf u r never the asshole forever and ever

#calico.exe #fnaf

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raid3r-r4bbit · 6 months

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@fuzzydreamin thanks for the lol. ive been a little busy with life so sorry for the late response.

Favorite Color:

Green. Like Blindingly Neon almost yellow bile/acid toxic hazmat pukey green. Also black. I'm also a fan of earthy tones, warm greys and browns, rusty orangey reds, and i also unironically love that "some smoker lived here for 5+ years but i swear the walls are white" sepia color.

Last song:

Either Childish Flamingo or 1x1. I've been hopping in between really screamy and just goofy shit atm because i cant focus with anything else. 🤷 But (I also jsut got a new BMTH hoodie) BMTH's post human album has been feeding me. It's a really good (visual? no.) example of that like just angry and over it nihilist feeling and I just *MUNCH CRUNCH AAAA* like i feel like it could be just the tiniest bit angrier and louder but i think that's my headphones.

as for childish flamingo, its like that miseryxcpr thing imo. It's goofy and funny and it slaps. and it's so catchy. it's like right on the edge of aha funny and fuck you street and i love it. i hope any of that makes sense im sorry lol.

Last movie:

the Demon Slayer movie. I skipped all the way to the end to see the fight between Akaza and Rengoku because they're two of my favs ( in order from that show: Uzui (my mom calls yuzu (my cat) Uzui and its adorable) Akaza and Rengoku. I Found out the english dub is out (im way behind) and just needed to hear their english voice acting. all of it is amazing and Akaza's lil gigles during the fight make me incredibly happy. Guys who laugh/giggle mid combat? Ugh >\\x//<

Currently Watching:

Demon Slayer, Chainsaw man, Tokyo ghoul (im rewatching a bunch of animes) Steven universe. (i love all of these and full recommend them. I literally just yesterday(or the day before idk time is a blur) got a new funko pop, it's the half-kakuja kaneki and i love it.)

Other stuff i've watched this year:

Spy x Family, the Junji ito Collection, Yamishibai (if you like picture style art and horror this is great, its somewhat junji ito like, but shorter stories and ngl the zanbai ep scared me a bit) psychpass (some reccomended this to me cause im (obviously) a fan of darker more gruesome shows, and it is very dystopian, love the art work, but i just dont get it.) Given (if you havent watched this show please watch it its amazing) Yuri on ice, Banana Fish (also another fave)

(I work from home, and pretty much exist at my computer, and need to keep on music or tv to keep the bad thoughts out, so i have a lot of time and opportunity to watch stuff ok)

Shows I dropped this week:

Psycho pass. again, i just couldnt get into it. I know a lot of people seem to really like and it full seems like a show that would be up my alley. that first ep was kind of a lot though. I'm not ashamed to admit i love shows that are unafraid to show nudity and violence but the two together (ifykyk) make me uncomfortable. If this case had been a little further in the show i think it would have been fine, but it's litterally the first like ten minutes of the show. I also tried watching this a few week ago while at wasteland but we were pretty much just out the door.

Devil May Cry. I still love the games and the characters, and i remember loving the anime as a kid but its just... so different from the games lmao.

Currently Reading:

random internet stuff, fics and shit. I feel bad because i used to go to the library all the time but at the same time, i dont really have the room to store a whole bunch of books and despite being super dyslexic, i read insanely fast, so renting/buying books isnt worth it to me. (i've read entire full length series in the span of a day or two, while doing other stuff. I need longer, more conveniently packaged novels and that typically comes in the form of fanfiction. )

tagging: @snowmutant @ivanpahdrylakeracer @glaochormfitheach(idk if ur cool tagging you in this kinda stuff, if not just lmk i though it'd be fun :D) @the-soup-witch(im dragging you into tumblr culture whether you like it or not, welcome to tagging games)

#tagging game #tag game #I STILL DONT KNOW HOW TO TAG THIS STUFF #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #how's that?

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anotherghoul666 · 1 year

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Swallow the Sun primer

For @devoured-by-shadows but anyone who's interested in discovering the Finnish doom masters that are STS are welcome to read! The post's addressed to them because it began as an ask and I went overboard Like I do hahaha

Swallow the Sun, shortened to STS, are a LEGENDARY doom metal band from Finland. They formed in 2000, created by master of Gloom, Beauty & Despair Mister Juha Raivio himself, composer and guitarist who will rip your heart right out of your chest and leave you in a puddle of tears with the beauty of the crushing tales he weaves. Within a year they had Matti Honkonen on bass and the absolutely extraordinary Mikko Kotamäki on vocals to form the core lineup which has remained stable since 2001. Drums and second guitar have changed a bit over the years (notably they had Kai Hato behind the kit from 2009 to 2015, #bestEraOfSTS. You may know Hato better from Wintersun, or Nightwish nowadays. He's one of my all time drum idols and, no joke, one of the softest, kindest, most gentle souls I've ever met in my life). STS's got the same lineup since 2018.

I will admit that Kotamäki's vocals are somewhat of an acquired taste, it did take me a while to get used to it too, but give it the time it deserves. He has cleans and screams to offer and once it hits, it's transcendental. Once you'll fall in love, this man will ensnare you and his voice will own your soul. He's definitely refined his vocal technique too, the song you heard No Light, No Hope is from 2007, he was still pretty raw then. I like the rawness but it is less accessible than how polished he sounds now. I don't see any reason why his recent vocals would not hit the mark for you, knowing what I know of your stellar music taste.

Through their career they have released 8 full length studio albums with the occasional EP and single release dotted throughout. Legit, they do not have a single bad album. They have rather different albums, and you will vibe with an era more than with another, most likely. It's up to you to find where STS clicks for you, which type of haunting menalcholy do their grip and won't let go of. As long as you are into doom metal and slow, melancholic, longing, painful, mournful 5-15 minutes songs, they will hit for you. Their lyrical universe is stunning, and once you're sucked into their sound, there's a non-negligible chance they will become a go-to band to cry to when you need to get it out. I know that's what they are for me. You just need to be in a mood for sad shit.

Keeping in my mind that my actual recommendation is "just listen to the entire discography from start to finish because it's 100% worth it and flawless perfection", I also recognize my bias and how unrealistic that is XD So I shall now proceed to go album by album in chronological order (which is also the order I recommend discovering them in because their progress is very satisfying to hear) and rec some songs to start your Swallow the Sun journey with!

Off of 2003's The Morning Never Came, I suggest: Deadly Nightshade Swallow (Horror Pt. 1) my favorite STS song because of personal reasons and attachment

From 2005's Ghosts of Loss, I suggest: The Giant Fragile

From 2007's Hope I suggest: Don't Fall Asleep (Horror Pt. II)

2008's Plague of Butterflies EP is one of the most ambitious, gut wrenching and honestly seminal projects in doom metal's history. It's a 35 minutes song that is a must listen in any metalhead's journey. Sit down, grab the lyrics, dim the lights and feel the beauty and sadness of one of the most wonderful and painful musical tales to ever come out of the genre. Unbeatable shit. My 2nd favorite STS song.

Off of 2009's New Moon, I suggest: Lights on the Lake (Horror Pt. III)

Off of 2012's Emerald Forest and the Blackbird, which is where I feel you'll start to hear the shift into STS's "modern sound" so this may be where you start to like them more, I suggest: Labyrinth of London (Horrors pt. IV) my 4th favorite STS song, the 3rd will come later This Cut is the Deepest Hate, Lead the Way

2015's Songs from the North is quite the outlier project in this band's discography because it's a triple album. It's legit 3-4 hours of music. Each album, I, II and III have a distinct sound and pull from different inspirations: you have a heavier metal one, an acoustic one and a deep slow doom 10+ minutes-per-song one. It's a big ass mountain to climb cause there is so much material here and it's not been trimmed. I sincerely feel like they could have made a single 12-13 tracks album with the three discs, idk. I don't suggest starting here at all, this is more of the deep dive album at the end of the journey if you really love them: Lost & Catatonic

Which leads us to the masterpiece of Swallow the Sun's discography, 2019's When a Shadow is Forced into the Light. Listen. There is a lot of history behind that album. A very painful personal history in Juha Raivio's life. I could recount the whole tale one day, because as STS fans we lived through it in a small way. With all the distance in the world, it wrecked me. 4 years later it still makes me very, very emotional. Long story short, Raivio's wife Aleah Starbridge, the Nightingale, beautiful soul, beautiful flamme, for whom we still hold the torch alight, passed away and this is the album of his grief. I think even without knowing the whole story, the album speaks for itself. This is one of my top 5 albums of all time. All genres, all bands, all music altogether, this album is one of the most beautiful, most difficult listens I have ever heard and it changed me deeply. This album completely changed me. There's a before and an after. Me and my father made our first listen of this album together on the road when it came out. Mw dad's a man from the 50s so you know he Does Not Cry, I have seen this man cry probably 5 times in my entire life, and one of those was us listening to this album for the first time. We had to pull over to the side of the road so we wouldn't get in an accident and we just stayed there, listened, held each other and sobbed together. I will never forget that memory. So as far as songs go? Just listen to the entire album. For real. Take the hour out of your life. It's worth it, trust me. When you're in the mood to take it obviously. Every song here is pure musical perfection. Stone Wings is my 3rd favorite STS song, but it deserves to hit in the context of the album. Do me and yourself a favor and experience the entire thing as it was meant to. Start of the playlist here

2021's Moonflowers is their latest release currently and I suggest: Woven into Sorrow

And those are the broad lines of Swallow the Sun! I hope you enjoy your journey in this universe of Gloom, Beauty & Despair! If you have any comments / questions about them (yes I have hagning out with the guys annecdotes too XD for instance hahaha) hit me up anytime!

#asks #swallow the sun #music primers

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todayimgonnaplay · 3 months

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Today I'm Gonna Play: Mafia II (Original version)

Almost a decade ago I had a period where I was addicted to Grand Theft Auto's formula for some reason. I played IV but didn't have the proper specs to play V, so I looked for similar games. The Mafia series came up and 2 was the latest at the time, so I got it. It definitely fit the bill although at some point I ended up rage quitting early on. This time I've decided to revisit and finish it.

Because this series gets compared to GTA a lot, I had the impression that this would be GTA-levels of open world. In a way, it is. You can drive around, buy clothes, eat at places etc. But the game is divided into chapters because it places story first. There's not much to explore in the city as it is to just get from one place to another. It's not really a bad thing, as other games have done something similar such as No More Heroes (Although I think that game implemented it in a strange way and wouldn't be worse off if it removed the open world). I wouldn't say that the world is boring either for the most part, the first half of the game really sets a nice ambience despite being set in the 40s during World War II. Driving in the freezing cold with the radio on made me feel a type of nostalgia for a time I never lived in. I love it when games do that. The second half shows a revitilization of the States post-war, with the country going through advancements and a time of peace, which is pretty great too.

The gameplay has a bit of variety going on, unlike GTA's usual methods of ''go to location > shoot people > go to location". Although this is present here, there are a number of stealth segments that condemn violence, mundane tasks that regular people would realistically do, and escorts (which is also present in GTA). It's nice to see this kind of formula be done in a different way. Do I prefer it over GTA? I can't say. Maybe with the right budget and polish this could be more interesting. I don't consume a lot of gangster or mafia media, nor do I know too much about their culture and history, so I don't have any suggestions or improvements, other than wondering if there is a game or series that really tries to be accurate and takes upon the opinions of people that actually live the lifestyle, like the Yakuza series for example.

The story is alright. It's a bit more serious and cast is somewhat interesting, mostly the protagonist Vito and his friend Joe. They really remind me of Niko and Roman from GTA IV. War veterans that end up in the US and are helped by someone close who's a bit of a goof, except Joe is way more likely to stand up for himself and make a good living. It even follows the structure of starting from the bottom and climbing the ladder to the top, which I think is the standard formula for this type of story. If I recall correctly, Scarface and The Godfather also have a similar structure.

As for cons, the controls feel quite clunky in the two most important aspects of the core gameplay: Shooting, and driving. Shooting is a lot better if you use keyboard and mouse, but it's not great on controller. I prefer to play most games on controller these days for better sitting posture and playing too close to the screen. But driving is quite bad in both modes. It seems like open-world games have a hard time figuring out the handling part of driving a vehicle. It's like I'm slipping on soap every time I turn. It doesn't help that I end up accidentally bumping into a car which puts me on a chase if the police is nearby. Other culprits that had this issue were games like Watch_Dogs and Cyberpunk. GTA on the other hand is a hit or miss but has managed to grapple with it fairly with IV and V. Games should really prioritize handling if driving is a major aspect of transportation, otherwise it's a huge frustration.

Additionally, sprinting is a nightmare. Not due to poor controls but rather the camera itself which shakes a lot when you run. I'm not sure if this mechanic has been playtested much but even as someone that doesn't really get motion sickness (I can play the Mirror's Edge games without the reticle) but this made me feel woozy every time I used it. There's no way to turn it off, and unfortunately nobody has made a mod of it either. So my only choices was to just look at the minimap or away from the screen to get to where I want to go.

Another frustrating aspect is that the game has no autosave or even manual save. Rather, it has sparse checkpoint saves that are at least guaranteed to occur after a finished chapter. This is frustrating if I have other commitments I need to get to in real life but cannot drop the game, but luckily I've strategized my time well, plus the game's chapters are typically short too. But I still don't like the idea of not having frequent saves, or at least checkpoint saves.

Some of the dialogue is also a bit iffy, although this is wholly subjective. A number of what's depicted and said towards minorities would not be tolerated today. There are a few instances where a game may use hateful language to depict a historical time, such as Red Dead Redemption 2, and this may be the case here too since it's set in an older time period. But I think it was done a bit excessively, as it gave me the impression that the game really liked to make use of slurs a lot, especially towards one ethnic group due to their presence in the story. RDR 2 on the other hand, did use slurs too but it was done sparingly, and also had a number of characters highly discourage hateful behaviour just to be safe. As much as telling an authentic story is important, video games are more interactive as a medium and can therefore be more influential (especially with how people can be online), so it is something to be a little careful of. I also noticed that the collectibles, which involved nude magazine pictures were more for satisfying typically masculine desires. But regardless, I understand that this game was made in a different time, and it's interesting to see fictional media do different takes on social issues which may conflict with my values from time to time. The developers also seem to acknowledge this as a warning message is apparently displayed in the Definitive Edition.

Overall, this game is nice to go through for those interested in gangs in fiction, or want a shorter and more story focused version of GTA. The frustrating gameplay make me hesitant to try any other entry of the series, but maybe I might change my mind in the future.

youtube

#mafia #mafia 2 #2K games #2K czech #game review #game reviews #game analysis #Youtube

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clownkath · 1 year

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ok so a couple of posts ive seen have got me thinking about the jesus and judas metaphors within kenstewy and so here i am, combining these two hyperfixations.

i originally reblogged a post and put some thoughts in the tags but then deleted it because ive rethought some things. because here’s the thing: kendall and stewy do not have concrete roles as judas and as jesus: the betrayer and the savior (though this interpretation can be different, i’ll elaborate on that later). they each are jesus and judas.

let’s first look at the obvious kendall is jesus metaphor. the biblical imagery is really bad, convinced that poor little meow meows might be channeling the suffering of christ in this one /j. kendall has his savior complex and his father is effectively “god” in the bluntest of terms. kendall also is logan’s judas, the rest of the family and/or waystar royco’s top (ie. gerri, frank) acting as apostles/disciples. he’s got the gethsemane moment in the third season when he “wants out.” he’s also got the water motif, and more that i can’t think about right now! jesus coded kendall roy!

now, stewy as judas metaphor. opposite to kendall even when they are on the same side, logan’s enemy though just a small cog in the machine in the rivalry with sandy (if logan is god then sandy would be what like satan? idk). general greed stuff that the title of judas conjures up. correlation between sins and judas: indulgence, pride, gluttony- all of these things alluding to the depths of hell. also that in many interpretations, judas is the guy that nobody likes, alienated by the rest of the disciples and history itself (screaming at succession to give him more screentime!!!).

when it comes to kenstewy, this stewy = judas and kendall = jesus and logan = god thing has a couple different facets. stewy as judas initiating touch / judas kiss, kendall not being able to reciprocate it blahblah. kendall is living his self fulfilled prophecy and stewy knowingly takes part in it, though he regrets it. their betrayal is somewhat inherent to their dynamic, always edging the line between bros and killing each other. another takeaway could be the obvious logan sees stewy as a parasite and leading his son astray, therefore judas metaphor.

onto the next interpretation, kendall as judas. already he’s a judas because of the whole “i have innocent blood on my hands” and “i’ve betrayed you” things. the guilt weighs him down. in this version, logan could also be god, actively staining kendall’s hands with blood, now remembered as a killer for all of time. kendall is also,,, oblivious. specifically to his own future and to the future of others. meaning that while stewy can see kendall’s doomed cycle (as well as logan), kendall can’t. also he’s damned for all time /ref.

stewy as jesus because he’s been betrayed by kendall but also because he has at least actively tried to “save” kendall by taking him out of the clutches of his father (in this case, satan yeah sure). he’s still attempting to save the person damned by the narrative, still has some love (although it’s very hard to love kendall). also cue that one post of kenstewy with the last days of judas iscariot quotes mwah. stewy holding love and honesty and barely shrouded truth for a guy who cannot take his love because he feels like he will never deserve it. the post makes me chew a bone! it kills me!

also some of the kenstewy dynamic reminds me of the gospels of judas, which says that jesus told judas the truth basically. it suggests that judas is presumably the only one who cares about jesus, out of the disciples (paraphrasing very heavily here). thinking that they can be vulnerable with each other though they know they are fated to cause each other’s deaths.

conclusion: they are going to kill each other and have the worst time doing it. the guilt will eat them alive.

#succession #kenstewy #kenstew #kendall roy #stewy hosseini #christianity tw #kendall x stewy #i shouldn't be on tumblr #im new to tumblr analysis so please #kill me

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ryndicate · 9 months

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So I'm doing some thinking.

Interaction and feedback is what gives me the motivation to write. I've been struggling to feel creative for a long while now, on ryndicate and my previous blog, and I think that's largely in part of how my writing gets interacted with on this site (ie, mostly just likes and silent readers). I don't necessarily think either are bad, but without the feedback, all the joy that I felt, budding and arching higher and higher as I wove the plot and stitched each detail together.. well it fizzles out before it even gets a chance to crest and just makes me wonder what the point was.

I know that the grueling fact of the matter is that without consistency, there is no building a solid following on this site. That's just a fact, from how I see it. I also know I don't have the most social personality, especially when it comes to consistent online presence because that's just not me. I don't have what it takes to be a cheerful and energetic internet entity and post all my thoughts and feelings and hypotheticals for my anime loves. I also know that I don't necessarily need to be *only* cheerful or *only* happy when I post, and that I'm perfectly allowed to be moody or sad or annoyed or whatever emotion I want; but when I am those things I'm usually not even on my phone, I'm buried in a hoodie and cuddled up with my hubbie for some good ol skinship or playing vidya with him to keep myself distracted, so I'm prone to dipping from the internet for what could be a week, could be months and often more, it depends on what caused my drop in mood, how busy work is, how the bills are going and you know--life.

So to sum it up: I don't want to stop writing, but I also don't think I have the right personality type to be a writer on tumblr, so the only thing left to do is resolve that.

The baseline of it all is that I think I'm better off on a site that has less to do with a following, like ao3. There's less pressure there and at least there I get somewhat of an idea how many people are reading even if they don't interact with the story at all. I know that website has also has its ups and downs-ive asked some mutuals and heard all sorts of opinions and its been an incredible help in helping me come to a decision of sorts-so i know its not a full ideal paradise solution, just something better suited for me than my current go of things.

To the few comments and anons that I've gotten—sincerely thank you. You have been that crest of joy that I've always wanted with my writing, the thing that kept me from giving up on writing entirely.

I'm gonna be opening an ao3, when I have the handle I'll ofc share it and there's no pressure to look at it or anything. I'm still deciding if I want to move my stuff from here over there or make it totally fresh (ADiT ofc will be moved since I'm still working on it.) But as for the oneshots idk yet, might archive the masterlist and retone this blog into my reader era, because I'm not leaving tumblr altogether, just as a writer.

#this has been sitting in my drafts since the middle of june ive been staring at it and contemplating and shirking the pressure of it #but today i had a rare day of mental relaxation and i think nows as good as ever #i think this is gonna be a good change for me in the long run #for all my long projects though i have more news and people probably arent gonna be happy about the extended wait but im now #prioritizng myself better lol

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unwelcome-ozian · 1 year

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hi oz, ozzy, and josha!

im the host of a system thats currently going through some upheaval, the inner world was just completely redone and is even larger than it used to be, everyone is seperate from each other now (but can still go between each others homes, were just not on top of each other in a shared hallway)

ive been noticing that my alters are all somewhat distresses right now, theyre not doing anything dangerous but theyre all feeling incredibly...lost? i guess? they feel like their purposes aren't needed anymore, like we dont need an alter for sex work because we dont do that now and are in a monogamous relationship. or they just, wanna redo themselves almost?

is there any way for me to facilitate this? or help them i guess? we have a pretty bad relationship honestly, my adult alters strongly dislike/borderline hate me honestly, which is making it hard for me to help them, but they also dont seem to want help?

anyway, thank you so much for your time and i hope you had a good day, youre incredible people 💖

Hello. Thank you for your encouragement. If some members of your system are experiencing distress but don’t really want your direct help, maybe helping indirectly by providing an opportunity for them to have input and increased communication through writing to one another may increase their sense of purpose by focusing their energy on a common task of understanding and cooperation. This could also give them an opportunity to share regarding any distress they may be feeling, and if there are any issues related to this, of which you may not br aware. They would also have a space to state ideas to be considered in working toward compromises that might be achieved to maybe improve their sense of wellbeing. If you’re interested, Oz and Ozzie’s system have posted some journals and workbooks to help improve system communication and working cooperatively toward some common goals here. It may not happen that the members of your system who are currently experiencing distress are the first to participate in these writing activities; however, as they see others participate, they may be inclined to join. As your system’s communication improves, your overall relationship with the others may change in a positive way as well. I hope this helps some. I wish you well.

~Josha

#answers to questions #distress in the system #alter communication #system communication #organized abuse support #journals #workbooks #supporting system members #Josha

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ascendandt · 1 year

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really long explanation of my song choices under the cut

1. WHITE WINTER HYMNAL (FLEET FOXES)

- its the cycles. the tragedy that is and was and will be happening. the removal from the scene and simultaneous desperation

- lyrical repitition yeah. timeloop

- "and michael you would fall" you WOULD. implied repition and inevitability. ya its like gan 👍👍

2. YOU & ME (TALLY HALL)

- "off again we go, another seed to sow, another part to keep in proper order, what have i begun, a getaway undone, i have seen the signs and i ignored them"

- ⬆️ HELLO? TIMELOOP. meticulous tweaking of circumstances to get gan not evil. i have seen the signs (of the impossibility of changing fate. and also of him in the first before having moral complexity) and i ignored them!!!!!

- YOU AND ME DIVINE. A CIRCULAR DESIGN! RETURN TO BE IN ORBIT ALL THE TIME

- "you turn away and around, ive been coming down" its a bit. its a bit that you might see your shadow... iykyk

3. EVERYWHERE (BRAN VAN 3000)

- youre everywhere to me... its gan. hes hes everywhere

- everywhere you came an left you came in the name of love! and left a wake of happiness and tenderness and SWEET CONFLICT.... it is always tortured :( link is so good natured but um well. its not going right. he still holds reductive morality that wont actually save anyone

- "you come on down but you dont come down" - its the way link keeps coming back to this guy this GUY HE LOVES to save him but he never gets at the root of it he never. comes down to why gan does what he does ever.

- also works as a sorrows (part 5 of b+f) gan perspective 👍 unrequited love baby

4. TEXAS REZNIKOFF (MITSKI)

- ok i actually have very little justification for this. but its verry sorrows esque to me. sorry

- oh except "but ive been anywhere an its not what i want... i wanna be still with you". its them to me.

5. FRANCIS FOREVER (MITSKI)

- what more can i say... the isolation. the seperation

- in sorrows ganondorf if left literally all alone on a shipwreck for days to months Several times, and is also hopelessly in love with link. for context.

- "i dont need the world to see that ive been the best i can be... but i dont think i can stand to be where you dont see me" - its literally him. he really only has link in his life, and he is doing all his evil-magic suppression in isolation FOR HIM.

- ⬆️ oh also somewhat a post-fear no more link. haha. he greives rajo his son and rajo his brother a lot. all this timeloop bullshit is for him after all... in defiance of fate and the gods snd everything. he MISSES HIM MORE THAN ANYTHING one might say.

6. ANNIE'S SONG (JOHN DENVER)

- hes everything to link👍 gives him purpose

- LET ME GIVE MY LIFE TO YOU. LET ME DIE IN YOUR ARMS.... the devotion and it all. yeah

7. I'M STILL HERE (GOO GOO DOLLS)

- this is particularly a song for fear no more rajo. the weird father son dynamic they got here is so fucked

- rajo feels inadequate he feels evil and ALSO smothered by link his dad. because link is trying to save him from being evil right. so hes both expecting him to act badly and need saving and ALSO be good. its fucked

- oh and also deeply estranged by society due to being raised in hyrule abd very much Not being hylian.

- like the lyrics refer to feeling inadequate and lost alone. people (in this case link and (joker voice) SOCIETY) expecting bad things from him... he wants support from his dad but its still very complicated WHATEVER...

- its um. hes just like jim treasureplanet.ok whatever

8. HYMN FOR A SCARECROW (TALLY HALL)

- by contrast. a link song.... nobody knows you and neither do i...

- the farmer jim in the lyrics is corfo cepolla to me (he is a farmer who link comes back to several times across timelines for advice and help raising ganondorf as a baby. hes cool guy).

- "he may imagine you heard and he knew... you wouldnt hear what he might have known" <- despite it all link really fails to take to heart what needs to be learned from the cepollas. HES A VERY ONE TRACK MIND GUY... like a scarecrow!

- song is about an enigma of a guy right. why does he do what he does. is he even aware. only the wind knows... its very him.

- also the birds the crows. they are fate somewhat. he drives them away by nature of what he does but the line "igniting a spark in [the crows'] minds so they circle and fly" feels like they are driven to return anyway. very much a theme in the story, like evil still arises whether in ganondorf or not. you cant save everyone always

9. BIXBY CANYON BRIDGE (DEATH CAB)

- link greiving his lost brother/son/friend ...

- in the silence it became so very clear that you had long since disappeared...i cursed myself at bring suprised that it didnt play like it did in my mind

- ⬆️ he keeps fucking dying. despite all the time nonsense rajo cant come back and you cant erase the losses of former timelines

10. SAMSON (REGINA SPEKTOR)

- the "history books forgot about us" and the "we coukdnt bring the cloumns down" is very sorrows to me. they loved each other and it still wasnt enough to CHANGE anything because he still died by links hand and the timeline was still reset.

- the uh. hair length thing is actually pretty important because 1. its a cultural thing to have gans hair long. 2. rajo cut off all his hair before he killed himself in fear no more (momentous Fucking occasion). and link feels ratherrr responsible for that. the hair cutting is a betrayal. and in the times where link raises him in the hylian fashion and cuts his hair its like. uprooting his whole life and for what? NOTHING to change. wawawawa

#i am... deranged about this right now

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