#also sorry skz followers but i got no other blog to really put this on

[skzmp3]

She's so pretty, yeah, so lovely She got everything, why am I, not her? Love me, love me, love me, love me, love me but Frigging, huh, my mirror allergy

- (g)i-dle, allergy

#usergidle #idlecreations #femaleidolsedit #kgoddesses #idolady #ggroupsdaily #idle #gidle #pls let me know if i can't use any of these tags #i don't gif girl groups often lol #also sorry skz followers but i got no other blog to really put this on #ANYWAYS this song like damn soyeon really went for it here #other.post

[moonhoures]

📰 𝐈𝐌𝐏𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐄: 𝐔𝐏𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐒!

literally me rn 👆🏻

anyways, hello my loves! i’m here to give you some updates on where this blog stands and is (hopefully!) going 🤭

first, what the fuck happened? 🫣

it’s been pretty much exactly a year since i dipped from this account (again). i’m sorry about that. i got a little overwhelmed and frankly just didn’t feel motivated or excited to write for a long time. i tried writing a few things (and got a little far tbh) but i just wasn’t satisfied with any of it. i even had a terrible moment or two where i got very close to deleting this account entirely but i decided against it as i’m really proud of some of the things i put out, and i would’ve been really sad to see it go. i also love all of you very much and appreciate everything you guys have done for or said to me, and i would’ve felt really guilty taking this blog away from you guys. so i promise i won’t be doing that any time soon!

second, first love 🥰

i’m sure most of you have seen my teaser for first love part 5 by now (which, yes, will unfortunately be the last part for the series 😓) but!! i have like 1 or 2 small things i plan on posting before hand to keep you guys fed since it won’t be posted for another month or so. i’ve been working on it as much as i can for the past couple months, but i do work basically every day so i can only write so much 🫤 but yeah, that’s how first love is! i’ll explain some more on it when i can!!

third, asks/messages 💬

i’ve gotten so many sweet messages since i went MIA (a little under 40 😭). i’m sorry to keep all of you waiting, but i promise i’ll try to answer them soon! i did get some negative comments about my absence and such, but i won’t be answering any of those publicly. i don’t want to feed into them. i understand i’ve done this multiple times & it’s annoying, and i apologize for that. writing is a big passion of mine (as is interacting with all of you!) but it can get draining running this account sometimes. i’m trying my best, and i appreciate your patience with me. i’m definitely undeserving of it.

fourth, also! ☝🏻

i have decided that from now on i will not be taking requests. as much as i love writing specific stuff that you guys want, it does give me a little anxiety. so i will only be taking very limited requests for drabble games and stuff like that in the future. i hope you guys understand 🫶🏻

i also decided to delete my twitter account (well, it kind of got hacked? i think? idk i had trouble with it and basically can’t get back in and don’t want to create a whole new one) so i wont be answering asks with twitter links anymore for this reason.

fifth, comebacks?! 🤩

i’ve recently tried to catch up on some of the comebacks i missed. txt’s temptation ep, monsta x’s reason ep, enhypen’s dark blood ep, and skz’s 5 star album have been in my rotation lately and i love them!! (duh) so if any of you want to stop by my inbox and fangirl over them with me i’d absolutely love that 🥺👉🏻👈🏻

lastly, a thank you 💌

thanks to all of you that continued to follow me, leave likes/reblogs/comments, and message me while i was gone. you guys truly don’t understand how much your support for me means. like i said, i was close to deleting this account all together, but i decided against it, and it was largely because of you. i decided to keep writing because of you. re-reading all of the precious comments you’ve left me on my older work motivated me and inspired me to continue writing first love which sparked my joy again. so, thank you. i also hope some of you read this and it encourages you to leave love for other writers like myself. you could be the one that changes someone’s entire outlook on their account and keep them going. at the very least, you’ll make their day 💕

also, thank you for 4,000 followers??? um what the fuck??? i’ve never had so many people supporting me, i’m actually losing my marbles rn please help me find them??? (that was such a lame joke, okay i’m going to bed soon 😭🥱 ily bye)

i love you. i love you. i love you. more content is coming soon. promise. 😚💗

#moon’s announcements 📢

[bewby]

i got tagged by @murderyoursoul @bourgeoix @ttathinker @hoeranghaee i think other people have tagged me as well but i forgor 💀 :(

(sorry this is long as fuck)

name seven😸

sign capricorn sun aries moon cancer rising sag venus pisces mars. 12H and 6H stellium🤣 yeah i know

height ummmm 165cm 5'4 i think? i haven't grown since like. 2014

time 0:49. it's night

birthday december 24th 😏

fave band i'm soooo picky with artists and their music so i tend to not have any but i love the neighbourhood and foster the people. depeche mode? : )

last movie ........*right eye visibly twitches as i try to ground myself so i don't start jumping from wall to wall* ummm. spree (2020) 😁 normal movie that i'm normal about btw. normaaalll. normalcore

last show extraordinary attorney woo!

when did you create this blog late march this year. btw i put this in my carrd but i had a blog before this one 2013-2020. then i deactivated

what i post mainly kpop specifically skz but as we have seen lately it has been getting a little crazy up in here..... i also really love animals so i reblog them alot. cute pictures. personal posts. anything basically

other blogs @bugsizedgirl my aes sideblog😏

do i get asks sometimes and it make me really happy!!!!!

followers 138 hehe

avg hours of sleep okay so i have been needing way more sleep than ever recently but then again the other day i had an early shift and only slept 2 hours. so basically late shifts 6-10 early shifts 1-5

instruments none sadlydjdjdjdj but i wish i could play bass

what i'm wearing umm. boxers and some dark gray shirt. also a pink roller in my hair for my bangs

dream job i don't dream of having a job. i just wanna find myself and have a good time fuck capitalism all my homies hate capitalism❤️ but if anything then something graphic design related maybe

dream trip i love travelling i don't have any specific place i wanna go to i just wanna see the world!!!!!!

fave song i literally can't just give you one. i have sooooo so many seriously. i love sha la la by pentagon please listen to it. what else. let me give you all like 5 random favorite songs. 2 on tinashe. musik non stop kent. greetings from california the neighbourhood. ridin round kali uchis. nun major shoreline mafia 😏

i'm tagging @dreamgirltaemin @bangzchan @minhhyung @noize127 @pewb @pinkhaech @btbtual @catws2014 @ooblech @li-huas @mashmouths @nevoono @absolutioncalling !!!!! and literally everyone who wants to do it. feel tagged by me 🫶🏻

[kim-woonhak]

I was tagged by @drzibs @chanstopher @rumue (thank yall <333)

NAME: siyuan

SIGN: sagittarius

HEIGHT: 5'4" // 162-163 cm (idr)

TIME: 12:42 am

BIRTHDAY: 1997/12/19 🐂♐️😃

FAVOURITE BAND/ARTIST: skz, nct, svt, tbz, bts, ab6ix, p1h, etc etc the list is endless u already know

LAST MOVIE: i haven't watched a movie in literal months.... rewatched princess mononoke back in may lol i usually only watch movies on the plane or in theaters, if im at home i just want to draw or watch youtube tysm

LAST SHOW: yesterday i was watching House and the first ep of the new GoT house of the dragon show with my roommate

WHEN I CREATED THIS BLOG: foreverrrr ago but i revived it into a kpop blog late 2020 !

WHAT I POST: kpop art n gifs of so many groups :))))) the speed at which i collect new groups is a problem

OTHER BLOGS?: @dreambivartence art inspiration and @jacob-bae tbz jacob + idols with flowers (kpop aes blog?) and i'm working on a sideblog for just my art sort of like a portfolio idk im bored i'll drop the url soon 😃

DO I GET ASKS?: mostly when i ask for an ask game bc im rly bad at checking otherwise im sorry i usually end up taking at least 1-2 business days bc i just fORGET to 😭

FOLLOWERS: so many!!! too many!!! why r there so many of u guys >:( lol thanks for putting up w my multi shenanigans 

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: my ideal is 9 bc im a babie when it comes to sleeping but i think i try to get at least 7 a day tho i usually only need 5-6 to function BUT ALSO i have a major napping problem i take the LONGEST naps like im talking 3+ hours each time so my sleep schedule is easily screwed over :')

INSTRUMENTS: i wish i could play an instrument :( i learned a little bit of piano n ukelele so i can at least read sheet music (uke/guitar tabs r still confusing to me) but i prefer to spend my time drawing :')

WHAT I’M WEARING: my pjs (free dropbox tshirt from college lol n sleep shorts)

DREAM JOB: "no job lmao." <- so real dreamy so real. "the platonic version of a trophy wife?" <- also real rumu <3 my roommate n i have actually been debating lately about which one of us needs to become rich so the other can be the platonic trophy wife lmao or let me be an idol makeup artist i want to do their pretty makeup i want to doll them up so bad !!!!

DREAM TRIP: taiwan / korea / japan / china (if it ever opens again 😭) also extremely niche but i really want to do the andean lakes crossing between argentina and chile near bariloche during the snowy season but idk if that would be too bitter cold to be enjoyable </3

FAVOURITE SONGS: rn it's villain by key & jeno and also doom du doom by p1harmony but all time is probably winter bear by v, side effects by skz, dream in a dream by ten, the truth untold by bts, cherry by ab6ix, zombie (eng ver) by day6, some by bol4

tagging (no obligation, sorry if u've already done thisss): @alrightyaphroditie @babytunninjadrac @decembermoonskz @efflorescing-mary @i-like-hockey-a-latte @lolacouldnotcareless @lvrli @myriad-of-colors @njaems @ofyoursilentreverie @peachjaem00 @pvddins-art @sulfurcosmos

#tag game #today was a four hour nap kinda day im so broken lmao

[hey-hey-chan]

The Protagonist - Hyunjin

❀ Slice of life 

❀ Warning: mentions of death & covid-19

❀ Word count: 8k 

❀ When your best friend Ryujin cheats on her boyfriend who you’re also friends with, you’re stuck to pick up the pieces of their relationship. When Ryujin starts pushing you away and Hyunjin starts keeping you close, you wonder who was a better friend to you in the first place and uncover new feelings you never knew you had. 

❀ A/N: i know i haven’t written in like a year?? but i suddenly had inspiration to write. Honestly, I felt the inspiration after I didn’t get picked job opportunity I really wanted (and thought I was going to get). I was put on the waitlist, but it still hurt my ego. But, I had some other good news and you can read on my blog about it, but I still wanted to write. I didn’t really have anything in mind, but I just let my words take me where it needed to be. Also, don’t get used to me writing, I won’t be writing often or at all. I’m not that into skz anymore LOL 

------

Do you ever feel like you’re not the protagonist of your own story? 

Yeah, that’s how I feel everyday. 

Especially today.

“Ok, on the count of three, we reveal our statuses ... one... two..”

“And three!” 

I tore open the letter from my dream college, Seoul University, probably giving myself a paper cut in the process. 

“OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, I GOT IN! I got in y/n, holy shit!” I heard my friend’s words over the speaker, but I just couldn’t get the stupid envelope open.

“Fuck this.” I grabbed the scissors nearby and cut the damn thing open, revealing a thin piece of white paper.

I regret to inform you that you have been...

I felt tears well up in my eyes instantly at the words “regret” and “inform”, already knowing where the letter is taking me.

“Y/N?? What does it say?!” 

I cleared my throat. “I didn’t get in...” 

I cried harder, silently, when I heard her moans of agony. “No fucking way! You’re a WAY better student than I am! There’s something wrong.” 

I shook my head. I was a good student, but I wasn’t the best personality. I was only in two clubs: acapella club and bagel club. Not good enough for the best university in our city.

“It’s ok. I have plenty more universities I applied to, I’ll be ok. I’m so, so happy for you though! I swear you’re gonna have so much fun!” 

My stomach churned as I said those words. Did I really mean them? I didn’t feel happy in the moment. 

“Ugh, I hate this... I really thought we would be roommates!” 

I set the pristine piece of paper on my desk; I didn’t even want to look at it anymore. 

“Don’t worry about it. This could even be a good thing! We’ll meet new people and just widen our group of friends. It’ll be awesome. Plus, I’m too weird for this clean cut college.” I joked. 

That made her laugh. “You’re right, they couldn’t handle your personality. Anyways, I got to go to drama club right now, talk later? And again, I’m really sorry y/n.” 

I pursed my lips. “Talk later, and don’t worry about me!” I ended the phone call and let the tears fall freely from my eyes. 

I knew this would happen. 

How could I compete with a chemistry major with a 4.0 GPA and the president of 2 clubs with a bombass personality? I was nothing compared to her. 

I picked up the piece of paper and took one good look at it before crumpling it into a ball and throwing it. The soft thud barely made a sound which was anticlimactic. I was trying to have an angsty teen moment here?? 

Sometimes I felt like I was just a side character in a movie or a book. I was that girl who watched her best friend experience all these things in life and you just stand by them and cheer them on. They are the ones who have a mental breakdown and somehow end up with the love of their life at the end. 

That was my best friend, Ryujin. 

She was the one that every guy and girl fell for. Her charisma bounced off walls and even made me dizzy at times. And it wasn’t even like she was the “girly-girl” that we see in movies, no no no, tomboys are much trendier nowadays. She was confident around guys and wasn’t afraid to embarrass herself in front of anyone. I was insanely jealous of her sometimes which I would never admit. 

She’s funny and adventurous, pretty and athletic: she is everything I ever wanted to be in a person. 

She even had the hottest guy in the school as her boyfriend, Hwang Hyunjin. 

I, on the other hand, was the opposite of her. I wasn’t overly awkward and uncomfortable to be around like the protagonists of some books. I wasn’t even cold and hostile like the mysterious girl in fanfiction. 

No, I was just completely and utterly average. 

I wasn’t “ugly” or whatever that means. You wouldn’t cringe away if you saw me, but the only guys I attract on the streets are the ones who might follow me home. I was friendly to people I met and was the queen of small talk. I was girlier than I wanted to be and try to put on makeup, but end up with botched eyebrows and nonexistent mascara-- that didn’t stop me from trying though. 

I cringed at every horror movie, I hate sports, I love astrology, and the only close friends I have are girls. 

Well, the only friend I truly have is Ryujin and all her friends became mine.

Any who, I was the girl that if a story was written about her, it’d be about 2 minutes long. I never had any big failures or big achievements. No family issues or tragic past. Nothing. I was a normal girl with a normal life. 

And now one who wouldn’t even be going to college with her best friend who she depends on for her social life. Oh yeah, I was a burden too. Now she can’t even be fully happy because of me. 

Great, just great. 

I felt a buzz near the bottom of my foot. I sighed and kicked it towards me. 

‘Ok i wasnt going to ask you this, but i just have to. did you know?’ -hyunjin

I squinted my eyes, re-reading the message to see if I got that correctly. What the heck is he talking about? 

‘what are you talking about?’ 

‘are you being serious?’ -hyunjin

Ok, now this is just weird. I sat up in my bed, suddenly interested in this conversation. 

‘im being serious. i have no clue what you’re talking about. care to inform me?’ 

I sent the text, realizing this is probably the longest conversation Hyunjin and I have had over text. We often hung out in person in groups, since he was Ryujin’s boyfriend and we did have the occasional deep conversation, but talking like this was new territory. 

‘im 100% sure ryu would tell her best friend that she cheated’ -hyunjin

Wait. What did he just say? 

Suddenly I was standing, pacing around the room. 

‘ok, i’ve officially lost whatever ur talking about. what the hell are you saying? ryujin did not’ I typed in confidence, but realized I shouldn’t immediately attack the victim. I erased the message and called him. 

He picked up almost instantly. 

“What the hell did you just say?” I heard him shift around, probably in his bed.

“I said, I’m sure that Ryujin would tell you if she cheated-”

“Ok, that, stop right there. You’re saying Ryujin cheated on you?” I felt my head spin.

Ryujin can’t be a cheater. That’s impossible. And plus, she would’ve told me if something was wrong in her perfect relationship. 

I heard a loud chuckle on his side. “Wow, you really don’t know do you.” I shook my head, but I realized he couldn’t see me.

“Um, I really don’t, so I would really love it if you explained.”

“What’s there to explain? She came to my house two days ago and told me she was cheating on me with Jeongin. Yang fucking Jeongin, who is, yes, a grade younger than us!” 

I winced at his volume. Hyunjin was a lot of things, but he definitely wasn’t a liar. Neither was Ryujin which is why I had no idea what was going on. 

“You have anything to say?” He asked. But I was in complete shock. 

“Well, um... I’m gonna talk to her about this. Bye, Hyunjin.” I hung up the phone and tossed it on the side of my bed despite his muffled talking. 

What the fuck is going on?

-------

“I’m asking you a simple question, did you or did you not cheat on Hyunjin?” 

After Ryujin came home from drama club, I was already there waiting at her door. She gave me a weird look since we live a good 20 minute walk away from each other, but yes, this conversation was worth the exercise. 

“Excuse me, what did you just say?” She asked with a sassy tone, but I had no time for this bullshit.

“Did you cheat on Hyunjin? God Ryu, just answer the question!” I felt my face turning red and I knew I was losing my temper. I had no idea why I was so upset, but I just was. 

I saw her features contort, and I knew I was going to hear the truth.

“Ok, yeah, yeah I did.” 

My heart dropped.

We didn’t say anything to each other for a couple of seconds. It was like we were both taunting each other, which she doesn’t have the right to do in this moment.

“Are you serious? Why?” I asked incredulously. 

She didn’t say anything yet walked passed me and straight to her door. 

“Hey, what the hell?” 

“Y/N, I cheated on him, what else is there to say? It’s done, it happened!” I almost flinched at her tone. It was bitter and angry and it was a tone I was used to with her. 

“What the fuck? Ryu, why wouldn’t you tell me? And this is breaking Hyunjin’s heart-” 

“You know what? I don’t have to tell you everything about my relationship! It has nothing to do with you. It doesn’t even matter, ok? I just don’t wanna talk about it.” 

I stood silently, wondering who was this person in front of me. 

“Fine, I’ll leave then.” 

As I walked back to my house, I couldn’t help but feel like I was stuck in the protagonist’s drama once again. 

-----

It was almost 1am when I got back home. Thankfully, my parents were asleep and thought I was staying the night at Ryujin’s like I told them. I snuck in the house and collapsed on my bed. This was too much emotion for one day. 

I peered down at my phone and saw the light illuminate the room.

‘So. is your world shattered like mine?’ -hyunjin

I bit my lip. Was it weird to text my best friend’s ex-boyfriend like this? Technically, we were somewhat of friends too. So I’m not breaking any rules.

‘this is fucked up. im rly sorry man, she really didn’t tell me.’ I brushed my hands through my hair and felt the sweat sticking to it. I had walked back in the spring heat, it was too much. 

‘Damn, I didn’t think she would pull something like that and not even tell YOU. that’s cold.’ 

‘tell me about it. we were just fine earlier today, dont know whats goin on with her.’ I hesitated before typing the next part. ‘also, i know we arent the closest and ik im also ryu’s friend, but im here for you bro. this is a messed up situation’ 

‘Thanks, that means a lot... most of my friends are making fun of me for getting cheated on... with a JUNIOR. disgusting.’ 

I snorted. ‘technically, if ryujin didn’t skip a grade, she’d be a junior too.’ 

‘y/n, pls don’t ruin this moment’ 

‘fine, fine, disgusting, she cheated on u with a junior. plus ur friends are felix and jisung who are also complete insensitive dickheads sometimes’ 

‘Thank you.’ 

I laughed. Hyunjin was always an interesting guy to hang out with. Sure we never texted or talked much, but he was always a joy to have around. He was quiet in school, but he was animated around his friends. And of course, an awesome boyfriend to Ryujin. 

Seeing them together made me more aware of my singleness. He would open doors for her, give her his jacket when she was cold, pay for her meals, he even knew how to braid hair, like what the fuck? He was perfect.

And then she cheated on him. 

And didn’t even tell me. 

I rubbed my forehead. I was always a fixer. I fixed other people’s problems, which made me quite involved in their issues even if I shouldn’t be. 

‘but seriously though, im rly sorry this happened to you...’ 

‘yeah ... a year down the drain. and plus, i got accepted to Seoul University with her today.’ My heart sank, even when I knew it shouldn’t. 

Hyunjin was a smart guy, maybe a little too studious for his own good. He had lots of fun in high school, but made sure to go home early to events and not drink if he had a test the next day. He spent hours at the library at times and read in his free time, like me. Ryujin always hated it and thought we were too similar at times. Which is untrue because Hyunjin was way cooler than me. 

‘If it makes you feel any better, I didn’t get accepted’ 

‘That actually did not make me feel better and made me even sadder because what the fuck?? you’re an amazing student!’ 

That made me smile of course, the valedictorian was complimenting my intellect.

‘aha thanks, i’ll probably end up going to incheon uni which isn’t too far from here so i’ll be ok’ 

‘That’s good, maybe i should consider going since half the senior class is going to seoul lol’ 

I scoffed. “hyunjin, don’t give up your dream uni just because ryujin will be there. you probably wont see her as often as u think’ 

‘If I decided not to go there, it won’t be because of Ryujin. But seriously, I rarely try anything new and i feel like i’m confined to a small group of people. At least at Incheon, I’ll know less people.” 

I sighed loudly. Oh Hyunjin, it must suck to get a mental breakdown right before going to college. It happens to the best of us though. 

‘well ok, where ever you go, i’ll know you’ll thrive!!’ 

‘:) thanks y/n. also, ik we dont talk much, but i really do appreciate you.’ 

Well, that warmed my heart... and my cheeks. 

The fact that I was texting my friend’s ex boyfriend snapped me back into reality. And the fact that she cheated on him. 

I gulped. 

‘aw thanks hyunjin, i appreciate you too. Now get some sleep! it’s almost 2am’

I didn’t get a response back, and I hoped he fell asleep. I changed into my pajamas and did my nightly routine and fell asleep to thoughts of my friend’s ex-boyfriend.

------

I woke up to several buzzes that tickled my side. I grunted and threw the blanket off of me. I found my phone that was flung somewhere and picked it up. I turned off the notifications to stop the constant moving. 

“It’s too freaking early for this.” I moaned.

I rubbed my eyes and peered down at the message.

‘hey im sorrrryyy for lashing out yesterday. i just feel guilty about the whole thing and i was afraid to tell you... also i think im in love with jeongin’ -ryujin

My eyes naturally widened at this confession. 

Love? Ryujin dated Hyunjin for a whole year! How could she fall in love with Jeongin so easily??

‘excuse me?? what the fuck did you just say cuz i think u just said u LOVE jeongin??’ 

‘stfu. just hear me out, he’s a great guy and he’s just... normal’ -ryujin

Ok, time to call this bitch.

“Define normal?” I heard her sigh and adjust in her bed. She’s always been an early riser.

“Just, when I was dating Hyunjin, it felt like it had to be this perfect relationship. We were all friends before and it just seemed right that we dated. He was super nice and perfect and not to mention, hot, but it just felt superficial. I don’t know.” 

Well this was new. Ryujin never told me much about the problems in their relationship and I thought everything was going well. Well, until now.

“I mean, I get that, you shouldn’t have to date anyone you don’t like. But, you should’ve broken up with him before!” 

“You think I don’t know that? I made a mistake, ok? Can you just get off my back about it?” 

There’s that temper again. 

“Are you serious? You’re the one who texted ME in the morning.” 

“I’m just, whatever.” She paused in between her words. “You just wouldn’t understand ‘cause you’ve never been in a relationship! I just can’t describe it, ok?” And on that note, I just hung up the phone. I was in no mood to play these games with her emotional roller coasters. 

I bit my lip, knowing she would probably call me more times for hanging up on her, but I wasn’t in the mood. I was caught in between two of my friends, and I knew who was in the right and who was treating me better. 

I saw my phone light up a few more times, which made me curious as to what she was sending me.

‘Hey, do you wanna have breakfast with me this morning?’ -hyunjin

I raised a brow. This was not the message I was expecting. 

‘only if you’re paying’

‘deal’ 

-----

Soft r&b played from the speakers as I sipped from my small cup of apple juice, yes, I still drink apple juice. 

“So, how are you feeling?” I finally asked the boy. 

He was wearing a black tshirt and jeans and his hair was messier than usual. I could tell he wasn’t getting lots of sleep. 

“As good as I can be.” He shuffled around in his chair like he had more to say. “Just, it’s still crazy to me. Getting cheated on... it’s a whole new feeling.” 

I nodded, but I couldn’t relate to it. 

“Yeah...” I trailed off, not really knowing what to say or how to cheer him up. 

We locked eyes suddenly and I grew shy. Hyunjin was always hot in my eyes, even though I pretended he wasn’t, for my friend’s sake. And for mine. 

“What did she say when you talked to her?” 

I laughed. “She totally flipped on me and told me to leave. I have no idea what’s going on with her right now. She’s lashing out for no reason.” I confessed. 

“Yeah, she’s acting more temperamental lately. She always had a temper but this time... this time it’s out of control.” 

I nodded, understanding what he was talking about. Ryujin was a feisty girl with lots of emotions. I respect her for being in tune with her emotions, but sometimes her actions go too far. Most guys thought it was hot though. 

“Anyways, I don’t want to talk about her anymore. What about you? Any relationship problems?”

I forced a small smile. “Nope, all the guys that were ‘into me’ were trying to use me to get to her.” 

Hyunjin took a bite out of his sandwich and shook his head. “Stone cold Slytherin.” I laughed at that one.

“Stone cold Slytherin indeed.”

“You know, Ryu has never watched any of the Harry Potter movies?? Which is crazy because I swear the first time we talked to each other it was about what Hogwarts house we would be in.” 

I nodded slowly. “Yes, yes I do know that my best friend has never watched the movies. And it pains me everyday.” He rolled his eyes at my teasing tone. “Also, I think that’s because you guys met in Mrs. Park’s English class which I also happened to be in. Remember, we all were friends first?” 

I thought back to those days, those simpler times. Hyunjin and Ryujin only dated for a year, but they’d known each other since our first year of high school. We were all somewhat of friends, more like acquaintances. But one day, their friendship just went to the next level. 

Hyunjin nodded his head slowly. “Yeah, you’re right. Ryujin isn’t as nerdy as you.” I scoffed, knowing that was not true. I was the dumbest in the friend group. 

“Alright, whatever you say.” I was out of witty banter. 

We called for the check and walked slowly to his car. For a moment, we just seemed like two friends. Two kids from school who were eating breakfast together.

But we weren’t really. I was his ex-girlfriend’s best friend. And he was the guy my best friend cheated on. 

And we were both losing a person who was ignoring us. 

“This is me. See you sometime?” His expression was hard to read and I didn’t know if he was saying this just to be kind or if he actually meant it. Either way, I didn’t care. 

“Sure. See you.” I waved at him awkwardly and he gave me a small wave back.

-------

A few weeks went by and soon, Ryujin and I were back to normal. I still texted Hyunjin quite often, but Ryujin didn’t know that. It’s not like I was lying to her, but I didn’t feel like she needed to know. It’s not like we were going behind her back and doing anything. He just needed a friend, and so did I.

The whole world was on lockdown and school got shut down early. Everyone was locked in their homes and told to keep a distance from each other in public. My electricity bill was off the charts and I was living off of Netflix for entertainment. Sometimes Ryujin came over, but she was the only one I really saw. She was an only child, so I pitied her. 

“Ok, this one or this one?” She held up two outfits that were completely different. One was a dark green shirt that tied in the front and sparkly paired with black jeans that flared slightly at the bottom. The other was a pink blouse with flowers paired with a blue denim skirt.

I looked up from my phone and sat up on the ground.

“That dark green one, it compliments your skin tone and the jeans are cute.” She nodded and tossed the other on her bed. 

“Great, Jeongin will love this.” 

“Are you sure he understands fashion? He’s like 12.” I felt a pillow hit me face in an instant, but the comment was worth it. The age jokes never got old. 

“Shut up! He’s the same age as me, only a grade younger. You know because I skipped a grade.” She bragged. I rolled my eyes and went back to playing on my phone. 

“Okay~ Whatever you say. I’m just saying, your boobies hanging out might confuse him-” 

She gave me a glare to shut me up from finishing. I shrugged and looked down at my phone. 

“Should you even be hanging out with him? We aren’t supposed to hang out with people during this time.” 

Ryujin snorted. “It’s my boyfriend, am I supposed to ignore him? I’d rather die.” I rolled my eyes are her insensitive statement. “Plus, aren’t we hanging out right now? You’re not my family.” Ouch, I’d always considered Ryujin family, but I guess she didn’t feel the same.

“That’s different. We’re best friends and I consider you my sister, since you don’t have one.” I spat. She narrowed her eyes at me and I saw the wheels turning in her head to clap back.

“Whatever, these rules are impossible."

I stayed quiet for a little bit, but I had so much to say. 

“What? If you have something to say, spit it out.” Wow, was her aggressive tone always this annoying?

I threw up my hands in aggravation. “Fine, I just think you’re moving on too fast from Hyunjin. You just broke up with him-”

“I cheated on him.”

“Ok, you cheated on him. Shouldn’t you wait a little longer to get into a relationship? It’s ... It’s sort of cruel.”

She narrowed her eyes at me but her eyes softened. 

“Look, what happened happened already. He knows I have feelings for someone else. I have to live for myself, ok? I’ll see you later.” 

She left the room and I knew that was my queue to leave her house. 

I picked up my phone and checked my messages before I left. I only had one, how popular of me. 

‘what are you doing right now?’ -hyunjin

I furrowed my brows. His timing was impeccable. 

‘um... nothing now. why?’ 

‘can you meet up rn?’ 

My eyebrows rose in surprise. Mr. Rule Follower wants to break the rules of quarantine? Interesting. 

‘... we aren’t supposed to hang out unnecessarily right now.’ I reminded him, just in case he forgot. 

I stood from Ryujin’s floor and started to look for my car keys. The perks of being the youngest sibling is that I was given my older brother’s car when he went off to college. Sadly, he’s back, but we share the car.

‘my mom is sick. shes getting tested today’ 

I froze. 

You never expect those words to come out of your friend’s mouth.

‘where r u?’

------

I got in my car and booked it. It’s like I was moving faster than I could think. 

Hyunjin’s parents were divorced and he lived with his father, so I knew he was safe to be around. But still, he saw his mom during the summers and occasionally throughout the year. They were close.

I drove up to his house and saw him sitting there with his head buried in his arms.

“Shit.” 

I parked on the side of the road and ran out as soon as I could. He jolted up when he heard the slam of my car. 

“y/n-”

I grabbed him and immediately pulled him into a hug. I wasn’t sure why I did it, but it felt right. 

“It’s ok, it’s going to be ok.” I said before I could think. I wasn’t sure she was going to be ok, or if he was going to be ok, but he didn’t need to know that.

I felt him shake as tears he sobbed into my shoulder. 

“She’s so old, y/n. I’m so scared. I hope she doesn’t have it. I fucking hope so bad.” I squeezed him tighter. Tears fell slowly from my eyes as I felt his pain. 

“I’m sorry. We’ll be ok. It’ll be ok.” I rubbed his back soothingly and sat on the steps with him when he calmed down. 

“I’m sorry for being such an emotional mess right now, I hope you weren’t anywhere important when I texted you. Honestly, I called Ryujin first but she didn’t pick up.” He mumbled the last part.

I frowned, but realized why she didn’t pick up. 

“You look guilty, why?” 

I thought about lying to him, but what was the use? 

“I was actually at her house when you texted me... she was getting ready to go on a date with Jeongin.” I admit. 

I saw his face contort and he let out a few strangled cries. I pulled him closer to me and felt his head on my shoulder. 

“I’m sorry, I told her not to go.” 

“Why? We broke up already. She made her choice.” 

He took a small glance at him. His face was red and puffy; his sleep schedule was also not getting better. I knew that because we always texted at 1am. 

“I know my opinion doesn’t matter, but I think she made the wrong one.” 

He turned to face me and we locked eyes. 

Usually with other guys, I’m skittish and sometimes awkward. I wanted to get away from them as soon as I could. But with Hyunjin, I felt at peace. I felt comfortable with him, safe even. 

The boy gave me a small smile and patted me on the back. He rested his head on my shoulder again. 

“Your opinion always matters, and thank you. For everything.”

“It’s not a problem.” I pet his head like I’ve seen in movies. I don’t think I’ve ever comforted a guy besides my brother. And my brother did not like to get his hair pet. 

I guess Hyunjin didn’t either when he shot up. I gave him a startled look.

“What-”

“It is a problem. Why do you run to everyone who needs help, y/n?” 

I froze in my spot, not knowing what to say. 

“Um, I don’t know. I guess I’m just good at helping people. I like comforting people. I like making people happy.” I tried to cheer him up. I did not want him to feel like he was a burden.

Hyunjin moved out of my grasp and faced me. 

“Doesn’t it get tiring though? I’ve never seen you get sad about something. And you got rejected from your dream college that we’ve been talking about for years. Still, nothing.” 

I laughed and looked away. This conversation was getting too focused on me and I wanted to shift the topic immediately. 

“Um, well of course I get sad. It’s just I deal with my emotions better when I’m alone. I don’t mind people seeing me sad I just want alone time when I’m upset.” That was a good answer. 

He wasn’t buying it though. 

A calming silence washed over us for a short moment. He kicked a small rock to the side and it trickled down the steps. 

“Why do I feel like that’s a cop out answer?” 

I was about to give him a snarky response, but I saw the pain in his eyes. He wanted to be distracted from his pain and wanted to focus on me. 

“Do you ever feel like you’re just a side character of someone else’s story?” I blurt out. Immediately, I felt like I shared too much about myself, but I couldn’t take it back. 

His silence made me anxious. So anxious.

I started to shake my leg, a nervous habit I had. Suddenly, he placed a gentle hand on my leg to stop it from shaking. 

“Bad habit. Also, I guess I haven’t before. Because we are actually the protagonists of our own story. Even you.” He peered deeply into my eyes to get his point across. I gave him a weak smile because I knew he wanted to cheer me up. But I didn’t need cheering up, I accepted that I wasn’t protagonist material. I accepted it a long time ago.

But he didn’t need to know that. 

“You’re right. I’m being silly.”

“Oh c’mon, y/n. You’re not being silly. You’re an amazing person. Total main character material!” I raised my brow but said nothing. He knocked gently on my head. “What’s going on in that head of yours?” 

So many things were going through my head. Including the fact that if I were main character material, I wouldn’t be sitting here with him right now. I’d be on some date with a cute guy. And then the whole situation would blow up in my face. And I would learn from it. And everyone would forgive me except maybe one or two people, but I would be ok with that because I learned from my mistakes and am a better person.

But that’s not me. I don’t make mistakes. I pick up the pieces of those who make mistakes. I fix them. I heal them. I’m the one who makes the main character realize they’re a shitty person. 

“Too many things, Hyunjin. Too many things.” I whispered. 

We said nothing for a while until he wrapped his arms around me. 

“I hope your mom is ok.” I quietly said as I rested my head on his shoulder. 

“Yeah, I hope so too. And I hope you realize your worth one day.” 

------

‘she’s not sick!! the tests came back negative!! WOOO! party at my house... ok virutal party lol’ -hyunjin

I cheered alone in my room. The test results came back pretty quickly yet it seemed like forever ago when Hyunjin cried in my arms. And we ended up spending the whole day together after I vented my feelings to him. But that’s besides the point. 

‘that’s awesome bro!!!! im so happy !!!!!!’ 

‘:) Thanks for being the best friend i have right now lol’ -hyunjin

I paused at the words ‘best friend’. I knew he didn’t mean best friend, but it still made me smile. 

Honestly, it was pretty cool being friends with Hyunjin and I wished that we were closer friends sooner. I guess I didn’t want to get too close in case him and Ryujin broke up. I didn’t know I’d be comforting him and not her.

‘ofc. u deserve happiness hyunjin’ 

He didn’t respond for a couple of minutes which concerned me. He would usually tell me if he was busy, but he just left suddenly. 

I tried not to think much about it so I set my phone on my table. I kept peering down at my phone every few minutes, but still nothing. 

I pulled out a good book and started to read a few pages. 

“y/n! I think your friend is here.” 

I furrowed my brows and closed my book with a pink bookmark keeping my page. 

“Friend? Didn’t know Ryujin was coming over.” I whispered. “Ok dad, I’ll be there!” I threw off blanket and opened the door. I shuffled to the front door and opened it. I ignored my dad’s weird looks as he made his way back to his room. 

Once I opened the door, I saw not Ryujin, but Hyunjin. 

His face was bright and I couldn’t help but smile back. His happiness was contagious, which is why he was so well-liked. 

He finally fixed his hair that was getting long due to the quarantine, but it suit him. He wore gray shorts with a sweater on top. 

I was suddenly aware of the gray shorts I had on. 

“Hey, we’re matching.” I said lamely. He laughed with his eye smile which was his best look. “What are you doing here?” 

“Wow, I’m hurt, no hello Hyunjin, I hear you come bearing good news.” 

I laughed. “You texted me said good news.” 

“I know, but I was wondering if you wanted to hang out right now...?” I crossed my arms and leaned against the door.

“Hyunjin, we aren’t supposed-”

“I know, I know, but I’m bored! I’m an only child too you know and I only live with my dad who hasn’t gone anywhere. And neither have I unless to see you. I know you follow the rules, so you’ve probably only seen Ryujin besides your immediate family.” 

I hesitated, wondering if it was the right thing to do. My heart was saying yes, but my brain wasn’t sure.

“Just go, honey. Just be safe.” My dad’s voice boomed. I looked back and saw him giving a thumbs up. 

“Really dad?” He nodded.

“Yes, but sure not to come in contact with any other people.” 

I held my pinky up, and I noticed Hyunjin was holding his up too.

“Promise.” 

------

The roads were so empty. 

“You make me! Feel like I’m living a, TEENAGE DREAM!” 

Hyunjin and I bumped to Katy Perry bops as we drove through a deserted city. 

“Don’t ever look back! Don’t ever look back~” 

“My heart stops!! When you look at me!” I sang. 

“Just one touch, now baby I believe~” He playfully poked me. 

“This! Is! Real! So take a chance and don’t ever look back~” I finished. 

He turned down the volume as we reached our destination. 

An empty parking lot. 

“Aw, how romantic.” I joked. 

“Sorry, not much places were open.” He gave me a small smile as he parked the car and rolled down the windows. We didn’t get out in case other people were around. 

I unbuckled my seat belt and turned to him. He was already staring at me.

“I’m really, really happy about your mom,” I said finally. He smiled, I had never seen him this happy for almost a month now, ever since Ryujin cheated on him. 

“Thank you. Also, thank you for being there when I needed you.” 

I thought back to a few days ago when he was sobbing in my arms. I felt my heart shatter for him. I loved his mom too, she was always around when we were at school and was just a ball of light. 

“It’s no problem.” 

"Right, because you’re ‘a side character’.” He used quotation marks with his fingers to get the point across. 

I rolled my eyes and pushed him. “Stop! It’s true though.” 

He looked at me again, his eyes saying “explain”. 

“Stop giving me that look. It’s completely obvious.” 

“Tell me again, how is this obvious? Because, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but all of your thoughts are yours. You see things from YOUR eyes, your point of view, and whatever. Your life is your life; no one else is the main character y/n.”

I hated when he said my name so much. It reminded me too much of myself. I always made sure to use people’s names in sentences to show that I knew their name and to make them feel special. I knew what he was trying to do. I hated that it was working.

“Look, if I was the main character of my own story, then why would my only purpose right now to be helping yours and Ryujin’s?” 

He flinched at my words. 

“What?” 

I sighed, feeling uncomfortable again when the topic was focused on me.

“You know what I mean. For months now, it feels like all I do is to help Ryujin’s character development. And maybe even yours. She’s the one who makes shitty decisions, I’m the one who fixes them for her. She says stupid things, and I’m the one who makes her apologize. She even gets accepted into Seoul University, leaving me behind. I just feel like everyone is accelerating and changing while I’m static! I’m the same as I was in freshman year, sophomore, junior and now senior. I’m the same person!” 

Hyunjin stayed silent while I ranted. My chest rose and fell from my heavy breathing and my cheeks were dusted with pink. 

“Also, if I wasn’t a side character, would I be here, hanging out with you, to help you get over my best friend cheating on you?” 

He had no response for my words. And I knew he wouldn’t because he knew I was right. I was the push to get them back together. I was probably going to get a text or a call sometime by Ryujin while she begs for them to get back together. Or to ask me to fix this whole situation. 

I was right. 

“You really think I ask you to hang out so much because I want your help to get over Ryujin?” 

His accusing tone shocked me, and it made me nervous. 

I tried not to focus on the police cars passing by and calmed my nerves. 

“Um... yeah, why...”

He wasn’t looking at me initially, like he was focusing on something outside of the car. 

“Y/N, I ask you to hang out so much because I like hanging out with you.” He confessed. 

At my lack of words, he kept going and ran his fingers through his hair.

“Just... this is hard to say... but I-I feel like I made a mistake dating Ryujin.” He blurted. This definitely got my attention. 

“What??”

“Please let me finish.” The desperation in his eyes lulled me to listen. 

“We were a good couple at first, but the chemistry wasn’t there. We never clicked. We didn’t talk about the same things and we could never have a deep conversation. Everything we talked about was so surface level or about her problems. She was fun to be with and a great girl while it lasted, but it wasn’t like when we hung out, even when I was still dating Ryu, we got along better. 

We could talk about conspiracy theories and weird things in history like it was normal! You were always the first one I talked to when I read a new book or if I learned a cool fact. I could never do that with her and I hate that I just realized it after we broke up. And when I started to hang out with you.

It was always you all long, y/n. It was always you.” 

What on earth was going on right now? This isn’t supposed to happen. I was supposed to fix this relationship-

“Ok, I see you’re kind of freaking out. And it’s freaking me out, please say something.” 

My leg wasn’t even shaking, that’s how numb I was at this conversation. 

“I-” my voice trailed off, like I couldn’t get the words out. 

“I have a lot to think about. I’m sorry, I can’t... I-” Tears filled my eyes. I didn’t know what was going on. This stuff never happened to me. Am I supposed to give an answer right away? That’s impossible! I need to talk to Ryujin first and maybe my brother and then just ignore the whole situation. 

“It’s fine, take as long as you need.” 

The drive back was silent, contrary to what it was before. I regret not taking my own car. I regret even hanging out with him in the first place. 

As soon as we got to my house, I got out.

“Thanks for the ride.” I mumbled, because I still had manners. 

“Hey y/n.” 

I paused and turned around, mortified of what he was to say next.

“I meant everything I said when I said it has always been you. I think.. I think if you think about our memories together, you’ll see that. 

I just.. I just needed you to know that.” 

I nodded slowly, unsure of what to say. 

Then he was gone.

-------

My first reaction was to eat my pain away, but I couldn’t even finish my banana. 

Ryujin would never forgive me for dating her ex boyfriend right? That’s girl code 101. Even if she did cheat on him. Or does that cancel out if she cheated? 

I downed a cup of water in anger. 

“Woah, slow down there, you don’t want to drown yourself.” I slammed the cup down and glared at my older brother.

“Chan, please. I’m not in the mood right now.” I tried stomping away from him, but he kept talking. Like always. 

“Uh oh, is it because of your boy? I can beat him up if you want.” I felt my cheeks turn red. 

“No! Don’t beat him up. And he’s not my boy. He’s Ryujin’s.” I muttered. 

“Wooo what? That’s a plot twist! Dad said he was completely smitten with you though. And Dad’s usually never wrong about boys and their feelings. He’s a therapist you know-” 

“I know who my father is, thank you very much! And, ugh, God, I can’t even.” I couldn’t even make it to my room before I collapsed on the floor. 

In the blink of an eye, Chan was sitting next to me. “Woah there, okay, this is some teenage angst I don’t know how to deal with anymore.” 

Anger rushed through my body at his words. And I’m not sure why. 

“Shut up! I don’t have teen angst! I don’t have any problems, ok? Just Ryujin cheated on this guy. And now I don’t know what to do!” 

Chan was silent for a moment, unusual for a person like him.

“What? What do you mean what do you do?” 

“I mean, how do I fix it?” 

Chan laughed. “Fix what?” 

“Fix their problems, are you not understanding what is going on here?” 

Chan stood up, then picked me up. I would usually struggle but he plopped my on the couch, so I was ok with him... for now.

“Y/n, it isn’t your job to fix other people’s problems. How about you focus on your own right now?” 

I peered down at my hands, embarrass to tell him what was going on in my life. I felt like such a trader. I helped my friend her whole life and suddenly, I was catching feels for her ex-boyfriend. 

I opened my mouth to speak, but I got cut off my a buzz in my pocket. Then I got like 10 more. I pulled my phone out and saw the texts from Ryujin.

‘i think i made a mistake’

‘i dont like jeongin that much anymore’

‘hes not a gentleman like hyunjin!! he doesnt even pull out my chair when i sit or open doors for me. plus jeongin is lowkey childish and he is always pulling pranks on me!’ 

‘tell me what 2 do?? how do i fix this?!!??!!?’

‘also my parents are fighting again and it’s sooooo irritating !!!!’

‘sos 911 aaahhhh’ 

“Who is it? What do they say?” Chan asked curiously. I shoved him away from reading my phone. 

“They’re from Ryujin. She’s already regretting dating Jeongin. The guy she cheated with Hyunjin on.” I wasn’t sure the sentence made sense, but Chan would understand.

Chan’s eyes widened. “Damn, dick move.” I gritted my teeth.

“And now, she misses Hyunjin. She says Jeongin doesn’t compare to Hyunjin who is nice and a gentleman. And her parents are fighting again. I got to go help.” I stood up to grab my keys, but Chan stopped me.

“Tell me why you were upset earlier.” 

His stern voice shook me. 

“Y/n, tell me.” 

Suddenly, my tears were unable to hide and fell freely onto my cheeks. Chan’s face didn’t soften, but he let go of my arm. 

“Tell-”

“Fine! Hyunjin told me he liked me. And that he regretted ever dating Ryujin.” 

I fell down on the couch while Chan held me close. He pet my head, like I did to Hyunjin earlier. I guess that was a good comforting tactic. 

“And now, Ryujin wants him back. What am I supposed to do?” I whispered. 

“Do you like him back?” 

I paused. 

Did I like him back? I wasn’t sure...

Chan patted my back and stood. “I’m gonna make us some lunch, sit here and think about it. And don’t you dare think about responding to those texts.” 

Hwang Hyunjin. 

We’ve been in school together since we were kids. We saw each other grow up. We were never close, but we wouldn’t be awkward if we were paired together in a project. 

He was always nice to me. He would remember my name contrary to all the boys in our grade. I faded into the background, especially when I became friends with Ryujin in the sixth grade. 

We were in acapella together and we were always in the same friend groups, especially when Ryujin and Hyunjin got closer. 

Everyone would yell and shout at us if we started talking about a book we just read or conspiracy theory we saw online. Or when we were both contemplating being vegan when we saw a deer get hit by a truck. 

He was the one who encouraged me to wear makeup even if Ryujin told me I was shit at it. He was the one who told me I could join acapella even if I was too shy to be on stage, because he was too. He was the one who dressed up as Harry Potter characters with me when no one else wanted to. He was the one I went to when I wanted to talk about the things I loved most. 

He was the one... He was the one all along. 

“Oh my god. It’s always been Hyunjin. Oh my god.” 

Chan set down a crappy sandwich in front of me, but I was on a mission. 

“You figure it out?” 

“Yes, yes I did! But what do I tell Ryujin?” 

Chan scoffed. “What do you tell Ryujin? She’s the one who cheated on him. And she’s always been a crappy friend to you.” I frowned. Ryujin wasn’t the best friend, but she was my best friend...  

“If she’s truly your best friend, she’ll forgive you for this. So go, go get your manz.” I cringed at his language. He was not as young as he thought. 

Then, I realized something. 

I looked at Chan who was just sitting on the couch, cheering me on. 

“Oh my god, you’re a side character in my story.”

The made him pause before he took a bit. “Uh, ok? Aren’t we all each other’s side characters? The protag will always be ourselves, dork. Now go!”

I ran out the door and checked my phone. Those can be dealt with later. Or right now. I’m not sure. Maybe at the same time. 

I jumped in my car and called Ryujin and put her on speaker. 

“Hello? Y/n?? Where have you been, I texted you like 20 minutes ago! I said SOS!” 

“Am I your best friend?” 

“W-what? Where is this coming from? Yes, of course you are-”

“Then you’ll forgive me for anything right?” 

She paused. 

“Maybe. I’m not sure, you’ve never really done anything wrong.”

I gulped. You can’t back down now.

“Is everything ok, y/n?”

“I have something to tell you. And you’re going to hate me for it.” 

“What?”

There was silence.

“What, y/n, seriously-”

“I have feelings for Hyunjin!” I shouted. 

Dead silence. I could hear the few cars driving in my neighborhood and kids laughing outside. The silence was terrifying.

“You what?” 

“I have feelings for Hyunjin. Your ex-boyfriend.” 

I heard shuffling on the other side. 

“Y-you can’t. He’s my ex-boyfriend. That’s breaking girl code, and I am not over him. What the hell, y/n?”

I felt tears fall from my eyes. This is not how I wanted this to go. But this is what I expected. 

“I’m sorry. But my whole life, I have been living for you. Ever since I met you. And this time, I have to do things for myself. I’m sorry but I- I want to be selfish and I want to make mistakes that you’re gonna have to decide if you forgive me for. 

I want to be the main character of my story right now.” 

“Y/n, wait-”

I hung up the phone. I couldn’t let her get in the way of me living for me. Even if it was selfish and bitchy. I need to make mistakes to grow. And I haven’t made many ground breaking mistakes in the past, but this one feels pretty good. 

I parked outside of Hyunjin’s house and ran up the steps. 

Before I could knock on my door, it opened revealing a disheveled Hyunjin. 

“You came.” 

I was shocked at his sudden appearance, but nodded. 

“I did, um, how did you get to the door so quickly?”

“I was waiting.” A cute blush danced across his face. 

How have I not seen him before? For how I truly feel about him?

For a minute, we didn’t know what to say. 

“I-”

“I-”

We laughed. 

“You first,” he said.

I cleared my throat. 

“Hyunjin, um, I’m not very good at speeches to declare my feelings. Most likely because I’ve suppressed them over the years and haven’t shown them to anybody. 

I’m dumb and stupid and now I’m selfish because I don’t care what anyone thinks right now because I realized that I am falling in love with you.” 

His eyes grew to the size of his hand at my words. 

“What?” 

I laughed nervously. 

“Um, I was .. I was talking to my brother. And I just realized that every moment in my life that I was insecure or unsure of something, you helped me through it. And when I just wanted to talk about something nerdy like a book or a poem that made me cry, I wanted to talk to you. 

It really has been you all along.” I whispered the last sentence, but I knew he heard it. 

He took my hands and wrapped them around his waist. 

“I’m falling in love with you too. I think I always have been a little, which sounds fucking up since I dated Ryujin. But I think we both knew we weren’t right for each other.” 

I nodded, feeling safe in his embrace. 

Then, I felt him hold my face and bent down to kiss me. His lips were soft and it felt like he was hesitant. Before I lost the courage, I pulled him closer. I could feel his smile across my lips. 

He made my heart flutter like I was reading a cute romance novel. 

Except I was in the romance novel now. 

And I was the protagonist. 

#stray kids scenarios #stray kids #hyunjin #hwang hyunjin #stray kids imagines #hyunjin imagines #hyunjin scenarios #skz #skz scenarios #skz imagines #hwang hyunjin scenarios #hwang hyunjin imagines #wow i havent written a piece this long in ... so long lol #this has been really therapeutic for me #but dont get used to it #lol #i truly believe once u dont care about who reads ur stuff or how many ppl read it #writing just comes to effortlessly #and it feels so relaxing .. like this is my world i am creating #i might private this later as well

[bearseungmin]

CONTENT CREATOR YEAR IN REVIEW

tagged by: @hanflix :’))) my love, rue!!! i love you so much!

tagging: @binniesthighs @milkym00n @dreamyhan @mochinnie @hanjizung @seungmoomin (if you’ve done this before please feel free to ignore this! :) ily) + anyone who sees this that hasn’t gotten to do it yet! tag me!!! i want to read into your world please this is fun to do i promise

NOTE: most of my works are nsfw. under 18 please do not interact with them.

1. first creation of 2020 and most recent creation of 2020 first creation: runaway, a lovely fluff + sci-fi! au about alien hyunjin running from his lab and finding solace inside of your bedroom. most recent creation: ironically another hyunjin drabble (he’s my kryptonite)! free with ads is a smut request by a lovely anon about hyunjin wanting to have fun during a movie night with skz! hard warnings btw, beware.

2. one of your favorite creations from 2020 the ricochet effect, although it’s not out yet! it’s an ot8 series, part per member/’choose your own’ vibe, and it’s already got me in my feels. the entire series is meant to have the message of “love does include sex, in a healthy way. you can experiment without being called names, learn from mistakes, and even (just maybe) find someone that you can share a little more time with. all while learning about yourself, and how to love yourself!” or at least i hope it comes across that way. :) it’s witty and has bits of actual advice i want to pass over to smut readers, all while still being fiction. i hope it turns out well.

3. a creation you’re really proud of imminent! it’s a long fic about wolfman! changbin. It’s completely based off the movie “the wolfman” from 2010 that i love substantially, (mainly because it starred benicio del toro, who i’m constantly inspired by) and sort of follows the lore of the film without being exactly like the film. i wrote it in two short sittings, and i’m completely proud of myself for coming up with a huge spin to the plot within like an hour before writing it. it’s also one of the only works of my own that i can read without cringing too lmaoo.

4. a creation that took you forever the ricochet effect, again! i currently have 4 out of 8 written, but it feels like it’ll be the year 3000 by the time i finish it, and i will not be living under water. i’ll be screaming at my wifi for going in and out and deleting what i’m writing. rip.

5. a creation from 2020 that received the most notes could listen to you read the dictionary is the highest of my notes right now! which, who doesn’t have a very specific felix’s voice kink? this was my first request on this blog, so i’ll cherish this drabble for a long time.

6. a creation you think deserved more notes before i swapped over to this blog from bearseokie i was doing a 1k drabble game/halloween drabble game, which brought two of my favorite drabbles to light! epitaph is a warlock! au smut that is centered around the idea that minho can make you see a few minutes into the future, and also bring you back to the now moment! vampire is a vampy! au (obviously) smut where you’ve come to love your human seungmin, and all he wants to do is join you in the life of immortality to make you feel less alone. bonus: for my harry potter/hogwarts! au lovers, stars is considerably underrated and is very cute! jisung is a ravenclaw, reader is a slytherin. could i make it any more obvious?

7. a new fandom you joined and a creation you made for it i’m still a baby stay, so stray kids! i have a tendency to listen to a group’s music for months on end before i even get into the members and knowing their history. but when i got into skz holy shit you’d think i had an epiphany, these dudes are insanely talented and i am so sorry i slept on getting to know them. i’m just going to link my entire m.list since that’s what stanning them has brought out! masterlist!

8. a creation you made that breaks your heart words to me, definitely. the idea of being around soulmate! chan is enough to make anyone weak, but the lights in each other’s eyes put together form a diamond to tell you both that you’re soulmates? i’m on the floor, i hardly even remember writing that bit but it’s in there and i’m going awooga right now.

9. a ‘simple’ creation you really love 11:47 took my brain cells and ran with them. fuckbuddy! hyunjin is always on my mind, but damn if me writing this out didn’t electrify those thoughts by a thousand.

10. a creation that was inspired by another one beat it to the door was inspired by daniel sloss’ comedy special “X” (it is highly mature content and possibly triggering content btw pls look into it before watching if you do!!!) inside one of his jokes he was speaking about how sex is bound to happen to everyone, and can be under any circumstance. while listing things you could have sex during or between, he joked “order a pizza, see if you can beat it to the door.” and my brain went: chan. so welcome to how my brain works!

11. a favorite creation by someone else i love all of the recs under my tag #during.dawn.bookshelf, but oh do i know how many works i have yet to read and i know will shake me to my core. i honestly cannot choose any specific works off the top of my head, so instead i am just going to link my skz writer recs lists so you can see all the people i adore + who inspire me every (and i mean Every) day! skz writer recs: list one, list two, list three

12. some of your favorite content creators from this year where do i even start, okay: @hanflix​ - can make you cry and be horny at the same time? wtf rue. i came here for fun and now you’re making me Feel Emotions Through Your Writing That I Have Yet To Feel In Real Life Mom Pick Me Up Rue Is Too Talented. read rue’s works or you will regret it. @mikoto-ica-fics​ - i would be lying my sweet ass off if i said mica isn’t the explicit reason i made this blog. her works will literally (Literally) send you into another dimension and make you fall in love with skz all over again. @nightshade-minho​ - mika mika mika let me announce that i love mika, mika’s writing (so much that you make me genuinely excited to write), and mika’s aesthetically pleasing blog. the best “let me dip my toe into the water (aka mlist) and see what happens oh no i’m in it now and it’s 5 a.m how did i get here.” you’ll ever experience. @binniesthighs​ - if you’ve ever asked the question: where can i get some good fucking food (skz fluff & smut) around here? see ro! @dreamyhan​ - why is hazel everywhere, and how did i not find her sooner? how is hazel so talented? i ask these questions on a regular basis. @mochinnie​ - you’ll never be bored if you know isa’s @. everything she does is so neat, pretty, aesthetic, astounding, talented, beautiful, amazing, etc of what lady gaga says in that one meme which fits isa way too well. there are SO MANY skz writers i could go on about like this, so please please please check out the skz writers recs list above!!! i’m still adding to it as time goes on :) if you weren’t specifically mentioned here, just know i will find your blog and i will fall in love with you. this is a threat.

#this took me so long wtf #this was well needed tonight i'm ngl thank you for this rue #makes me feel like i've been productive with my hobby :')

[slytherinbangchan]

Ryuusei🌠Stray Kids Benders!Au. Chapter Two: The Northern Water Tribe

<<Chapter One: Intro and Leaving the Air Temple. >>

I’m not stating the pairings in the beginning of the chapters anymore cause of obvious reasons if you read the AU :’) maybe in future chapters I will again~

Main Characters:

-SKZ members

-‘Sky’ >Original Character< . (It’s a girl but there’s no mention about her appearance aside from the obvious clothing tattoos etc… from Air Nomads so you can imagine her however you like best I only gave her a name).

⁽ᵖˡᵉᵃˢᵉ ᵈᵒⁿ'ᵗ ᵐᶦⁿᵈ ᵐʸ ˡᵃᵐᵉ ᵖᶦᶜ ᵉᵈᶦᵗˢ⁾

I’m putting lots of love on this Au so I hope you all enjoy it

Blog’s Masterlist

Benders Masterlist

The Northern Water Tribe is not that far away from our Air Temple. That is why we used to spend a lot of time there. At first when my grandma got sick my dad would still take us there sometimes so we could see Jisung and the others but that was, as I said, only at first.

As the first time I ever saw them when I was a child, I got goosebumps as I contemplated the magnificent ice walls of the Northern Water Tribe. This time maybe for very different reasons. We were alone and we'd have to enter the city like that. But it went fine. Even if almost every nation still trained soldiers, it wasn't like we were at war at the moment.

Chan went to find the place where we used to stay with our family when we were younger and luckily it was still there. I went to take a look around without going too far either so Chan could easily find me when he'd finished with that. As I saw the children playing I thought of Felix and Jisung and only then I was completely aware that I was in the Northern Water Tribe for real. That it wasn't one of the scenarios I used to play in my head before falling asleep. I looked around once more, this time being fully aware of where I was. My heart racing everytime my eyes met some guy's ones around my age. But it couldn't be that easy right? Me finding Jisung and Felix just like that. I sighed as I smiled to myself. My hand over my chest feeling my heart beating. I saw some guys in the distance talking to some girls and I smiled again. Maybe Jisung and Felix were married by then and they'd introduce me to their new families. I really had no clue of how their lifes had evolved since last time I saw them.

As I was deep into my thoughts some kids run into me as they played around. Pushing me so hard I almost fell to the ground but I was quick enough to help myself with airbending. As I stood again I saw in the distance something I had seen many times before when I was a child and I had no doubt then that the guy stretching his neck all the way back was Jisung and the guy in front of him talking was Felix.

I walked towards them with shaky legs and as I came closer I realized Felix had noticed me but he didn't say anything. I think he didn't know who I was at first for sure but he was wondering if I was who he thought I was as I was coming closer. When I got there I poked Jisung's shoulder and he turned around. 'Huh? Wha-?.. Hey'. He smiled at me. 'Are you lost or something?' He asked. 'Ah... No.. I'm...' He looked at me head to toes. 'Wow, you're beautiful. Do you have a boyfriend?' I blushed as he said so and Felix bursted out laughing. 'Jisung how dumb can you be?' He asked. 'What?' Jisung looked at him and then back at me. Just in time for my brother to find me. Chan's arm around my shoulder. 'Oh, here you are' He said.  He looked up to see who I was talking to. 'Oh, and you found Jisung'. I think my whole body was blushing at that point. Jisung's ears and cheeks were red aswell. Guess he finally realized who I was. 'How have you been? You remember us, right? I'm Chan' He said. 'We used to play as kids. This is my sister, Sky. Remember her?' Felix was laughing so hard in the back. 'Y-Yeah I remember'. Jisung said. 'I'm sorry'. He apologized looking at me but I was so happy to have found him, I couldn't help but to start laughing too. 'You're such an idiot'. I said. Then I hugged him. I felt my heart stop as I recognized the smell of his own clothes and hair and body. It had been buried in my memories for so long. 'I've missed you'. I said, then I pulled back slowly looking at his eyes. 'I've missed you too'. He said. Cheeks still red. And there was this moment between us where I felt something but I didn't know yet what it was. 'Hey, no hugs for me?' Felix asked taking me away from Jisung's gaze.  I hugged him and then took a look at how much he had changed too. He was so handsome. He had long hair and it was tied up in a bun contrary to Jisung's who had an undercut, the hair on the top was long though. He had it tied up too. Both of them had grown taller compared to the last time I saw them and their backs grew wider. They seemed stronger too.

Chan started chatting right away and honestly asked most of the things I wanted to ask. Felix was indeed married. He had a daughter too and she was two years old back then. Jisung was single. According to Felix he liked to ''drink from many different glasses'' Jisung hit him after he said that but we all laughed. 'It’s not like that'. He said. 'Anyway I'm young I don't wanna get married yet'. Jisung pouted and we laughed again. 'It's okay I understand'. I said. Chan messed my hair a little. 'Oh yeah, you understand?' He chuckled. 'Not even if Hyunjin asks you to marry him?' He asked and I blushed. 'Shut up. I don't even like him'. I said. I don't know who I was trying to fool Chan knew perfectly fine I was utterly in love with Hyunjin since I was practically a baby. I guess I didn't want Jisung to know. Guess I wanted to get to know who he was back then before I started crying about Hyunjin in front of him. Maybe deep in my heart I wanted to forget all the pain that thinking about everything that happened with Hyujin caused me. And I mean the good and not that good stuff. Cause our good memories were almost as painful as the separation one. Maybe I just wanted to look at Jisung and feel that happiness I was so used to feel when I was with him years ago and that was all. But maybe there was something more.

Felix's house was nice and his wife so cute. Also his daughter. She had her cheeks red as Jisung carried her around. Playing with her without getting tired even a bit. I found it really endearing actually that he had such patience with kids cause I didn't have a lot myself. 'So, what are you planning to do?' Felix's wife asked. 'I'm going to the Earth Kingdom after this and Sky's heading to the Fire Nation's Capital'. 'Really? That must be exciting. I've never left the City'. She said. Chan kept the conversation going for a while. I was, once again so deep into my thoughts to do anything else. Yeah I was going to the Fire Nation in a few weeks all by myself. And then I'd meet with Chan again at the Southern Water Tribe but first I wanted to visit the Southern Air Temple. It wasn't too far apart from the Capital so it shouldn't be any problem.

That first day at the Water Tribe we went to bed so early. We were exhausted after all and even if I was happy to see the guys I needed to sleep too. Next day I went to explore the city with Chan. The guys were busy during the day but we met at night. They took us to a bar where we ended up drinking. That's when we all started talking for real about what we all remembered about our childhood. 'I think I had some kind of crush on Jisung back then'. Felix said and we all looked at him. 'Felix?' I said as I chuckled. 'What?' He asked. 'He was cute and strong it's kinda my type'. Felix said. 'I knew that already. Someone say something interesting we don't know or I'll go to bed. I don't think I can stay awake otherwise'. Chan said as he chuckled but no one had anything to say apparently. 'Okay, good night then'. He said as he stood up. 'Wait for me. I shouldn't be late either'. Felix said. 'Oh, ok. Jisung will you walk Sky home later?' Chan asked. 'Yeah, sure'.

I stayed with Jisung and we kept drinking. At first cause it was awkward they left us alone. And then cause we were having fun and didn't want to stop. We were laughing about some stupid anecdote when they told us the bar was closing. So we stumbled out that place and walked around for a bit. 'Should I walk you home now?' He asked. 'Ah... I don't know I'm having fun'. I said. 'You are huh? Okay, come here'. He said as he signaled me to jump on his back. I did it without thinking too much about it, then he bended some ice to a very, very high place and we sat there. 'Ah, I forgot you're so good with waterbending'. I babbled as I was impressed and pretty drunk at the same time. He chuckled. 'That was pretty easy actually but thanks'. He said as he patted my head. And I was so drunk I just followed his touch resting my head on his shoulder. If he had some kind of reaction or not about it I couldn't tell cause my eyes were closed. 'Ah... Sky... You know... I was very impressed when I saw you yesterday'. He confessed. 'I should have known it was you but I didn't. I'm sorry'. I chuckled. 'It's okay. I wasn't sure at first it was you either cause you're so hot now. But you were making that thing you do with your neck and I thought it had to be you'. He chuckled. 'What? Sky? You think I'm hot?' I frowned for a second still with my eyes closed. Then I opened them and looked at him. 'Well... Yeah...' He chuckled softly. 'I see'. His feet moving happily as we chatted. Then it started to snow but we didn't care about it. I didn't want to go back. I wanted to stay with him just listening to his stupid voice and his laughter while I rested my head on his shoulder. 'Hey Sky, look'. He said pointing at the night sky. 'Don't you think those stars look like Ddalgi?' He asked and my heart stopped for a moment. 'What?' I asked as I sit up to look up. Then he pointed again and drew a path with his hand. 'See? Looks like a flying bison, right?' I smiled as I looked up to the portion of sky he had cleared up of clouds with his bending. But of course I knew what stars he was talking about even if I had forgotten about them for a little while. 'Sky? Are you ok?' He asked as tears run down my face. I patted my cheeks confused as to why I was crying. 'Yeah... I don't know why I'm crying'. He tilted his head. 'Probably Hyunjin'. He said. 'What?' I asked. 'You know, like when we were kids. You only cried because of him'. He chuckled. 'That's not true'. I complained. 'It is. It's okay'. He sighed. 'I wish you would pay attention to me only when we're alone though'. He mumbled. 'I heard that. I do pay attention to you'. I said. 'That's not what I meant'. He stood up and dusted off the snow on his clothes. 'C'mon I'll walk you home'. He said offering his hand to help me up and I frowned. 'Then what did you mean? Just tell me'. But he didn't say a word.

The guys and I did a lot of stuff the following days and most of the time Jisung and I would end up somewhere alone again. Just chatting about stuff. We run out of childhood memories at a certain point but we just kept talking about ourselves. And I just felt so close to him. And I was happy cause after years not knowing how visiting them again would turn out, there we were like time hadn't passed and at the same time fully aware that it had. 'You didn't tell me' I said and he looked at me. 'Huh?' He tilted his head. 'The reason why you told me the attention thing'. He chuckled. 'Are you still thinking about that? It was nothing. I just thought since we hadn't seen eachother for such a long time maybe you could be just happy about being with me? Instead of being sad for Hyunjin. But I was just drunk I wasn't thinking so It doesn't matter'. I sighed. 'I get it. I'm sorry for making you feel like you're not enough reason for me to be happy. You actually are'. He whined lightly. 'This conversation got too serious. Let's go drink something'.

I remember looking at Jisung as he was getting more drinks for us two. Then these girls aproached him, hugging his arms, not letting him go. It seemed like he knew them. I remember laughing too cause he really wanted to move and come to our table but those girls wouldn't let him go. I also remember feeling my blood boil as one of the girls's hands slipped to his crotch as she whispered something in his ear. That's when an unexpected gust of wind opened the bar's door dragging with it some snow that ended up covering those ladies. Jisung scaped then and came to sit at my side. 'What was that about?' He asked. 'I don't know what you mean' I said. He chuckled softly and just drank his wine. 'Guess you got popular around here over the years' I commented not looking at him. He shrugged. 'Guess I did'. He wasn't looking at me either. 'If you want to go with them I can go find Chan'. He left the cup on the table and sighed. 'Do you want me to go with them?' I really didn't know what to say. I didn't even know why those words left my mouth on the first place. 'Are you perhaps jealous, Sky?' He asked. Why did he have to ask me that? Was he that used to people falling for his charms or what? I just scoffed. 'Sky'. He called and I looked at him. And I was kinda mad at him but his face was coming closer to mine and I wouldn't move. I was too busy looking at his approaching lips to actually do anything. And my brain was asking me to move but the truth is that my body ached at just the thought of me getting even one cm away from Han Jisung. And so he kissed me and I could had never imagined how sweet that kiss would taste. I felt some kind of fire inside me as his lips moved guiding my own inexperienced ones. But my heart hurt and I knew exactly why. He looked at me and softly wiped with the back of his hand some tears from my cheeks that got to run away. 'What is this about?' He asked softly. But words wouldn't come out of my mouth. That's when he realized. 'You were thinking about him again'. He stated.Then simply more tears run down my face. 'I'm sorry'. I managed to say. He looked so hurt it made me want to cry for real.  He scoffed. 'Good night Sky'. He said, then he left.

And I was sorry. I was really so, so sorry that I cried while kissing Jisung. Cause I wanted him to kiss me and that's the truth. But as he did I remembered that night with Hyunjin at the cliff and how much it hurt when back then I realized I would never get back the chance to kiss Hyunjin and him being my first kiss. And now that chance was gone for real after I had hold into it for so many years. I didn't regret kissing Jisung not for a second. I also was sure Hyunjin had kissed someone else by then. I wish I could have told Jisung right away I wasn't crying cause of what he thought I was. But there was a knot in my throat that wouldn't let me speak up.

He avoided me for a couple of days. Next time I saw him was on Felix's house cause he invited all of us to lunch. But Jisung ignored me the whole time. He spent the afternoon playing with Felix's daughter. And it got to a point where I got jealous of her. Cause she fell asleep on top of him and she wouldn't wake up. He was laughing with his precious laugh and still her eyes would stay closed and her cheeks blushed. And I envied her. Maybe being jealous of a child was my punishment for letting myself go with that kiss after waiting for Hyunjin for so many years. Everyone was talking about how cute Jisung looked with Felix's daughter when I let out a heavy sigh. They all looked at me suddenly and I lightly blushed. 'Sorry I'm gonna go'. I said. 'Oh, well see you at home then?' My brother asked. 'Uhm actually can I talk to you?' I asked him and he followed me outside for a moment.

We talked for a while and then I left to pack. I had no more reason to stay there. I already had seen the city a thousand times by then and I had catched up with the guys as I wanted to. Also Jisung wasn't talking to me so why would I stay there any longer? I might as well just go to the Fire Nation and see the others. Find out for once and for all if their lifes had changed that much or not. 'What are you doing? Are you really that stupid?' Jisung was standing right in front of Ddalgi as I packed. 'Oh, now you talk' I said not even looking at him. He scoffed. 'Yes I'm talking now cause I can't believe you were jealous of a toddler to such an extent you're leaving the city'. I scoffed as I laughed. 'You really think I'm leaving because of you?' I asked. 'Aren't you?' He asked too but I said nothing. He sighed loudly. 'Ok if what you want is to get away from me again. It's up to you this time. None of your parents are dragging you out of the city now'. I sighed too and then I started crying. I couldn't really understand why I broke down like that at first but I was pouring out my whole heart. Jisung bended some ice column and jumped on Ddalgi running towards me. 'Sky...' He said as he hugged me. 'Why would you say that?' I asked as good as I could. 'I'm trying so hard to just understand and find some answers. I don't wanna be away from you but you're pushing me'. He hold me tighter as I said that. 'I'm sorry'. He said. 'Sky, I'm so sorry'. He wiped some of my tears and combed my hair back with his hands. 'Jisung, to be honest I don't think I'll be strong enough to be away from you ever again'. I babbled and he chuckled. 'Are you drunk Sky? You only say things like that when you are'. I shook my head. 'Not drunk'. He was looking at me lovingly then he sighed as he stood up. 'Ok, in that case I guess I should go pack now'.

Felix and Chan's faces as they saw Jisung and I getting on Ddalgi to fly away were priceless. 'I don't understand they were fighting a minute ago'. Chan told Felix but we could hear. 'They're just two idiots who can't live without eachother now. Just leave them'. Felix chuckled. 'What???' Chan asked. 'Jisung are you dating my sister? WAS THAT A LOVERS FIGHT BEFORE?' Jisung laughed at Chan's questions but I was blushing. 'What are you even talking about Chan?' I asked. 'And please never EVER use the word ‘’lover’’ again'.

There was a silence between Jisung and I at first. But it wasn't awkward at all. We were just enjoying our freedom I guess. With the wind caressing our faces and the view of the ocean. 'You know Sky... The other day when we kissed'. He suddenly mentioned, making me blush. 'You know it was a joke, right?' I laughed awkwardly to his question. 'Y-yeah, sure'. Was it though? Why did he get so mad at me then? I don't know why I didn't ask back then. I guess I was insecure so I just believed what he said. 'So we're okay right?' He asked. 'Yeah. You shouldn't worry about me that way'. I said. 'Right. You're already in love with someone else'. He said and I nodded. He forced a smile as I did. 'Yeah I thought so'.

I don't know why I nodded. I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that I understood  it was just a joke and I wouldn't stay mad for something like that any longer. I guess I was just embarrassed and I would have gone along with anything he said at the moment. Plus I was indeed in love with someone else. My feelings for Hyunjin wouldn't just go away like that just cause Jisung and I kissed. I would be lying if I said I didn't feel anything for Sungie though. Actually I probably had always felt that way. Only I was too deep into Hyunjin to realize. Now that it had been years since I last saw him and I was alone with Ji, everything came out. But after Jisung told me he kissing me was only a joke I just tried to sweep those 'new' feelings under the rug and keep moving forward. And even when I thought it'd be kinda awkward to let go just like that, Jisung made it pretty easy. He kept treating me like nothing happened and soon I felt like that kiss actually didn't happen. Like it was only a blurry dream-like memory in my head. Maybe cause I wasn't fully aware of what I was actually feeling it was also easier for me to act like nothing happened and everytime I'd force myself to bury those feelings deeper the ones I had for Hyunjin gained strenght again.

Chapter Three: The Journey to the Fire Nation. (Coming next)

Remember to leave a like/reblog if you enjoyed it please and thank you🖤~

#stray kids #skz #stray kids au #han #jisung #hyunjin #chan #bangchan #chris #changbin #minho #lee felix #felix #i.n #jeongin #seungmin #woojin #benders #avatar #benders au #fic #stray kids scenarios #stray kids imagines #kpop #kpop blog #3racha #firebending #airbending #waterbending #earthbending

[seungmin-jpeg]

so i hit 1k followers today omg I’m still in shock tbh. i’ve only had this blog up and running for about 4 months now, not even that long, but it’s been the best few months of my life honestly. i’ve met some of the most amazing people, and have been constantly surronded by fun, high spirited, amazing friends. Along with that i’ve got to know 9 amazing and talented people who never fail to make my smile when im down. When i made this blog i didn’t really know what to expect, but i was welcomed right away and was quickly accepted by all the other fans, faster than any other fanbase i’ve ever been apart of. I just want to take some time to highlight some of the people who’ve made my day’s happy and always bring a smile to my face :) if i miss anyone i’m sorry, im so bad at these lol 

Regardless of whether i tagged you or not, thank you all so much for following me and putting up with me <3

✨- my beautiful mutuals that i love with all my heart and you have a special message under the cut! 🌱- i love your blog so much and i hope we can talk more that is, if we havent talked already! ☁️- we don’t talk that much, maybe never, but i love your blog and hope one day we can talk even more!!!

@mydarlingfelix 🌱// @straykiddosmom 🌱// @straykids01 🌱// @adorehyunjin 🌱 // @seungchanie ✨ // @changbeanie ✨ // @deathbywoojin ☁️// @strayboys ✨// @goddamngyu 🌱// @straycuties 🌱// @kimseungminns ✨// @pooh-bear-woojin 🌱// @versekiller ✨// @strayykiddos ✨// @arqueritefrost 🌱// @etherealstraykids 🌱// @nctcry ☁️// @stk0t9 ☁️// @yafelix ☁️// @leedontknow🌱 // @hey-hey-chan 🌱// @straybin✨// @chxngbinnie ☁️// @ohmyspearb 🌱// @just-pig ☁️// @heavenly-freckles 🌱// @fandumbscribbling ✨// @strayedtoofar 🌱// @s0ftminho ☁️// @felixflowers ☁️// @kiribunny ☁️// @likemates ☁️// @strgaykids ☁️// @junspurplehair ☁️// @hear-the-dokidoki 🌱// @hobi-stole-my-heart ✨// @astraykidsdaydream ✨// @felixfrecklesjpg ✨// @minhomygod ☁️// @officialchangbin 🌱// @maaatryoshka 🌱// @awoojinstan 🌱// @sechangbin ☁️// @chang-put-me-in-the-bin ☁️// @felixthekoala 🌱// @woojinshairwasblue ☁️// @realstraykids 🌱

this looks kinda messy but oh well

@seungchanie - vale, ah one of my most treasured skz mutuals <3<3 you were the one who kept me in the fandom when i first joined, the person who made me realize what an amazing fanbase this was and who always make me so happy whenever i see anything from you, whether its a message or one of your cute drawings. thank you for being one of the first to welcome me into the wonderful world of stray kids!!!

@changbeanie - Ruby, wow where do i even start. i cant even remember how i found your blog, but it was pretty much love at first sight lmao. you’re writing blows my mind its so amazing, and you always inspire me to keep up with my writing too! i was going through a rough patch with my writing over on my main blog, but seeing all your work, and how many nice anons you got and everything made me want to keep going with everything. on top of that you’re literally the sweetest person on the whole planet and actually deserve every single star in the sky omg

@strayboys - hi phoebe you mean the actual sun? honestly the most friendly and welcoming person i’ve ever met my whole freakin life. not to mention funny and like all around perfect? i’ve got so much to say i dont even know where to start haha. but seriously both you and your whole blog make me so happy who even needs the sun anymore cause you’ve got that covered. the fandom wouldnt be the same without you!

@kimseungminns - Joyce! we haven’t talked in a little bit but still, i’m so thankful i was about met you and talk about everything we have so far!! thanks again for offering to read over my drafts lol, for someone who runs a writing blog i struggle with all the little things like spelling and man are you a life saver lol. you’re one of my first stray kids mutuals and will always have a special little place in my heart lol

@versekiller - J! my smol bean lol tbh we haven’t talked that much like directly but you’ve been around since i first made this blog back when you were doublekn0t lol you’re a solid predebut buddy lol. when i first found you and your blog i was like “wOw DaRk” but now i know you’re actually just a ball of sunshine haha. your blog is beautiful. you’re beautiful. and your writing is beautiful. lets talk more okay lol <3 

@strayykiddos - Elisa! first off thanks for talking with me when that dumb fox gave me a heart attack lmaooooo thanks for dropping by and messaging me like you did because honestly that was such a blessing and now i have a wonderful friend like you omg. your icon honestly gives me life and i love how easy it is to talk with you!!! i’m really looking forward to all the conversations we can have in the future! 

@fandumbscribbling - Kriti! we started talking because of woojin not getting enough screentime and then ended up talking non-stop and honestly it’s been the best! I’m excited that we both get to experience college at the same time. Who knows, maybe i can make a little trip up to where you are for college and then we can scream about stray kids in person lollllll

@hobi-stole-my-heart - Della, oh man first off thanks a thousand for helping me with all the pj au stuff haha. It’s been amazing to get to know you, and to have a fellow writer who feels the same way about a lot of the same things! also thank you for always screaming about things with me because boy did a scream a lot today hahah rip

@astraykidsdaydream - Kaitlin!!! first off your mobile theme color is everything and it makes me so happy lol. thanks for messaging me like you did, i’m a shy bean haha. you were one of the first people that i messaged when our boys finally debuted. even when the showcase happened i talked with you the most about it all. i hope we can keep talking and get to know each other even better!!!! <3 

@felixfrecklesjpg & @straybin - my admins T_T Ulfah and K, i’d seriously be lost without you two. thank you so much for helping me run the network - i promise i’ll actually get it totally up and running and start planning things soon so we can actually start really doing things lol. thank you so much for joining me and working with me!!! i can’t wait until the ball really starts to get rolling, i think we’re going to have a lot of fun in the future!! 

#wow this took a while #its late here so this is kinda a mess oops sorry about that i hope there arent to many spelling mistakes haha #sorry if i missed anyone!!! #i hope everyone knows that i love them #whether you follow me or not i legit dont care #i love everyone #1k appreciation post #i stopped watching my kdrama to make this wow #devotion #my.post #hannah gets emotional

[hunshines]

I'm awkward too, so no worries 😅 How did you get into skz? And into exo as well ~ Spill the tea 🍵 And I checked your skz blog and I love how whipped you are for hyunjin xD I can relate to you so much cause hyunjin and bang chan are coming for me ☠ - skz anon

I wrote so much so I put it under the cut aldskjad

Skz was wild. Idk why but I knew about Felix first because his of his deeeeeep voice (but I don’t remember from where) and then I found he was from skz so I was like, cool I’ll check them out. I listened to “My pace” and that was good but I didn’t really pay much attention to their other songs 😣 (which was a mistake cause they’re 👌👌) Anyway, skz was also all over my ig explore and they were such meme-y boys I was like, big mood can relate. I actually got interested because of Jisung’s/Felix’s/Hyunjin’s aegyo song on weekly idol LMAO. *fun fact, jisung was my first bias and then hyunjin came in and smacked me in the face* I AM WHIPPED FOR HYUNJIN 1000% He makes me so soft I’m honestly so soft for all skz members but especially him because he’s such a warm person??? 😭

I CAN FEEL YOU WITH CHAN omg. Like he’s so b*yfriend. Honestly, just the amount of love and time he puts into everything he does with skz makes me feel so happy that he’s finally succeeding and doing what he’s been working so hard for. And YOU CAN SEE HOW MUCH HE ADORES HIS MEMBERS. I really feel like I could trust CHRISTOPHER BANG WITH MY LIFE. (i could write essays about every member of skz, which really isn’t smt I can do for a lot of groups)

Anyway, onto exo. 😣 Exo was the complete opposite. It was weird because I didn’t like them at all at first. All my friends were exo fans and I was the only tvxq fan and I was like ??? what is the hype? Not to mention the fact that I kept hearing “wolf” and I honestly thought it was terrible. TBH, I got into them because I read a Sehun fic on aff and I was like, okay this is fine… I should probably learn their names, lol. “Growl” was my first fav exo song and the one that made me really start liking them. And here I am now, 5 years later. It’s been pretty wild. Sehun was my first and will always be my bias in exo. The other members have shifted around a lot in my bias list but never him. 😖 I LOVE ONE (1) MAN. (also not to be that person but all of my friends are now bts fans so i’m the only exo fan 🙄 i literally have no one to go to w/ my rants about them or skz)

sorry this turned out so long, i’m kind of embarrassed. BUT I LOVE INTERACTING WITH MY FOLLOWERS EVEN THOUGH I DON’T TALK MUCH. (i lowkey don’t want my ask games to flop, oops) Thanks for continuing to send me asks, it means a lot!! 💕TELL ME ABOUT HOW YOU GOT INTO THEM TOO. (and if u wanna come off anon and message, me i’d be down for that too. i talk a lot if there’s anything happening with the group though, so be ready. or i’ll just send u memes)

#ask #anon #skz anon #i talk so much i am so sorry