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acourtofthought · 4 months

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I’m not sure if it’s ok for me to ask you this but I really like your posts and the way you interpret. Disclaimer: I am not antielain but I get confused with her sometimes. If anything I say comes off harsh I apologize and plz kno I didn’t mean that way. Just heads up this will be long

I guess I sometimes think ppl expect almost too much from elain. Part of it is because we don’t know much of her character/personality. Like ppl expect that she’ll do a complete 180 and prove us all wrong. I do think she will prove us wrong but not like that I guess? Not so drastic? I’m thinking similar to how Nesta grew in her book where it wasn’t a complete flip of her personality but it was a build up on it. I personally think that’s the whole point of these books it’s to learn to give love to ourselves (via the characters) rather than change ourselves or personalities”for the good of others”

So I think ppl associate bubbly chatty extremely giving bighearted personality to elain bc of how she was as human, before her life changed completely. But I don’t even see her as that back then? Basically there is a “type” I see assigned to her by fans and for me it’s just not quite there.

There is so much anti-elain content out there so I understand wanting to contradict that and disprove the haters. And I don’t mean to bash anyone, but I guess envisioning her in one “appropriate” way by fans is strange. I hear too many what ifs about her and ppl getting upset at those who don’t agree with the what ifs of her personality/character (those “what ifs” are treated like gospel)

Additionally- I saw a post of yours mention that elain might be disturbed about feyre’s pregnancy and how she might be upset with herself for not being acquainted with her powers to foresee it and I honestly love that. it’s an exciting addition to look forward to about elain, but couldn’t sjm have mentioned that in nesta’s book? Like a scene where the three sisters talk about it or something?? This is what I mean about seeing a lot of expectations for elain’s character. Dont get me wrong I love this idea and I theres a good chance e it’s true, but I have to see it be shown for her character and so far I’ve been given nothing. Also why didn’t anyone tell Elain that the childbirth could harm feyre?? Maybe she could’ve done something! That could add to Elain’s character right! Even if Elain isn’t involved with ic stuff that’s her sister. I mean, Elain was smiling at her sis by the end (could be hiding her pain of sisters almost-death maybe?). Do we really have to wait for Elain’s book to know that she was disturbed by the events of feyre’s childbirth?

An anti-elain thing I see is that she’s not very bright. I don’t agree with this. I’m thinking if she was always aware what was going on bw nesta and feyre could she have done nothing? Especially since nesta has said she would do anything for Elain’s happiness. What of feyre’s happiness u know?

Elain never hurt others like Nesta did but when it’s pointed out how kind she is, I do believe it, but I can’t help but wonder if she showed that kindness to her sister Feyre. Like Feyre is so quick to say that about Elain, and Elain did own up to her mistakes, but it’s hard not to imagine how Feyre must have felt as a kid. feyre is so sure of Elain’s love for her I’m just wondering where that surety comes from because as a reader there’s a bit of a disconnect to what makes feyre feel that way. Could it be feyre’s guilt of them turning fae? And then elain never blaming her sis for it? I think maybe a little of it is that feyre understands elain. Do you think elain is a dreamer im the sense that she wishes good things for all people? Elain did had a chance at happiness due to her family’s love for her, maybe id like to see more of it reflected for her family? Do something big for them? I know she shows them affection constantly, and i love that I think it’s so sweet, but it still doesn’t tell me enough about her. As of now, Elain to me comes off as someone who puts herself first (not selfish but just knows her worth, not self destructive like nesta ), which will be exciting to see from the classic self-sacrificial type of fantasy mc, she is someone who maybe isn’t always quite aware of what she needs to do but she was the will and desire for it, and lastly, though she focuses on her well being she is still aware of the feelings and concerns of those around her.

I guess I see that elain has some flaws and I’m okay with it. She’s probably hard on herself like Nesta is to herself. And I think she’ll probably still have a few hiccups along the way in her book which is always exciting in a book. I don’t tell myself that she’s this perfect, sweet, summerflower child who’s never done anything wrong. I think she is currently lost snd For now, could be changed later)I think that maybe this is the first or one of the few times where elain isn’t the one fully happy while others around her are l so it’s a new thing for her to understand, navigate, and find the happiness within herself and around her (she’s already doing some of that). Maybe she always found the happiness around her from things being good but now needs to find it within? Also she is now finding the part of herself she’s always maybe wanted to. Or now needs to be due to now being fae.

And why would it be wrong if she’s imperfect? What is this obsession with her being perfect knows it all who doesn’t owe anyone anything? Since the fandom likes to talk about these characters like they’re real- elain would most certainly not think of herself that way.

Maybe I’m not seeing it all clearly of her character? Sometimes it is hard for me to keep her character and personality separate I admit. I know she loves her family, I know she’s concerned about a lot that’s going on, but we only get like 1 instance of her showing anything and that’s it. So when the characters just keep saying this and that about Elain’s traits, but Elain is shown having that trait or quality once im ?? Where you at girl?

Ultimately I tell myself that it doesn’t matter how a character begins but rather how and what they grow into. I think being turned fae has forced her to do a lot of growing up (I don’t mean this in a bad way at all. As a reader, I think it’s v interesting)I’m willing to bet if sjm had done more planning from the start i would feel entirely different. I think im at a confusing spot with her character, but at a 100% hopeful&optimistic for her story kind of spot.

I’d love to hear your thoughts and If you don’t answer I completely understand. Frankly, I don’t want to add to any anti-elain discourse ( or even anti- nesta I love her) My intention wasn’t at all to bash Elain’s character. I am absolutely not an anti but if anything comes off sounding anti I apologize. I’m looking for some discussion and understanding of her honestly. I think the most important knowledge I’ve gained from your blog is that elain shouldn’t and can’t be compared to the other female characters of this series especially her sisters. I mean, none of the characters should even be compared, but yeah expecting her to be exactly the way her sisters are is not the way to go about understanding her character. I love your posts about elain and I very much like Elain thanks to you. I’m lowkey obsessed with elucien bc of you. and your posts are what got me interested in her character since you pay attention to her in such a healthy way.

Nothing you said came off harsh at all and I was excited to receive your message!

This is going to be long and rambling so I apologize in advance.

I absolutely agree that some seem to expect too much from Elain, both right now and later, especially when SJM has given us quite a bit of growth from her already and she's not going to become a completely different person.

She started off the series kind but fine with allowing herself to be taken care of. She still had thoughtful moments though, she used her "allowance" from Feyre to buy Feyre paints and to buy her father a new chisel rather than using it all on herself.

But by the end of ACOTAR, she started taking care of Feyre, planning the ball to honor her return, finding her a dress, preparing a horse and a satchel for her.

In ACOMAF, we see her apologize for failing Feyre, we see her willing to risk her engagement by letting Feyre use their manor to meet with the human queens.

In ACOWAR, after she had lost everything, she only spent weeks (maybe 2 months) sitting silently in her room in a depressed state. Then she started learning how to bake (and now helps cook for the IC) and thought of a way to help the humans, by having them head to Graysen's estate. Then she was cruelly rejected by Graysen, was kidnapped a second time but still helped save Briar and Az, then saved Cassian and Nesta (as well as many others) when she stabbed the king but then saw her fathers murdered body.

Though she mourned those things in ACOFAS, she still did not regress. She continued taking care of Feyre and Rhys's garden, began helping those in Velaris with their gardens, continued cooking for the IC. Then in SF we see her stand up to Nesta, see her offer to search for the Trove, see her go to the Hewn Cith with the others despite Feyre offering to let her stay home and despite the fact that it's cruelty bothers her.

I honestly don't know how anyone could expect anything else out of her before her own book and even after her own book, she's not going to morph into someone unrecognizable. She's not going to become a bloodthirsty, dagger wielding spy who thrives on going after the enemy and plotting their demise.

I see some claim she needs to get fed up with the others holding her back, where she'll head off on her own or seek out Lucien to help her. But where in Elain's personality has she ever shown to be rash? Where has she ever shown to be that angry with her sisters that she's going to go behind their backs to prove something? It's exactly like you said, Nesta's arc made sense for Nesta because that was within Nesta's personality.

If Elain has a problem, she addresses it with the person (as we saw in her argument with Nesta) and moves on. She was laughing by the end of SF when Nesta said "fuck you". She nearly watched Feyre and her nephew die in front of her. At the end of SF, Elain and Feyre were beaming at Nesta while Elain held Nyx in her arms.

Where in that is anyone getting the "I'm mad and I'm going to prove them all wrong!" vibe from Elain?

I have a feeling Elain's setup will be that of Rhys coming to Elain for help with something in Spring or the continent and that will kickstart her book. She's already told us that "she's part of the court and will do what is necessary" so all that we need to have happen is Rhys finally asking her to get her hands dirty. Her setup doesn't need to look like Nesta's did.

I do think we're going to see a different version of Elain when she's around her people (Lucien, Vassa, Helion, Jurian, the LoA), but to me that's kind of a given based on SJMs pattern of the FMC coming into her own once she's with her found family. So I do think we'll get more of the outgoing, life of the party version of Elain that we saw in ACOTAR, at least the Elain once she was overseeing their new manor and at the ball.

To your point about Elain feeling guilty, I don't think, if Elain were taking the events of Feyre's pregnancy onto herself, SJM would necessarily tell us that in SF. For one thing, Elain doesn't often share her deepest sorrows and regrets with her sisters. We know she's mourning her father because we're told how often she visited his grave but it's not because she sat down and had a deep heart to heart with Nesta or Feyre over it. Just like we had to wait for SF to see Nesta's complicated emotions over her fathers death, I think we'll have to wait for Elain's book to get inside her head and understand how she's processing everything that has been happening. For another, the end of SF was meant to wrap up Nesta's arc. We were meant to walk away with that HEA vibe for her character, not necessarily focusing on anyone else. I think SJM subtly hinted that we're about to have Elain's story when she closed out the book with the rose carving, when Nesta lets go this symbol of Elain and releases it into the world as a "permanent marker of beauty and good" but I don't think she wanted us majorly focusing on anyone else outside of Nesta and her journey.

For anyone calling Elain dumb, I think ACOFAS and SF prove how intelligent and aware Elain is. After Elain talks of traditions, Feyre notes her wisdom. In SF, Cassian notes how Elain had seen everything about Nesta and understood.

SJM has confirmed that Elain is a quiet dreamer, that she has a different strength than Feyre or Nesta, and that she expresses love openly in a way that Nesta always struggled with so I don't think we can deny those aspects of her personality, I'm not sure why people keep trying to claim her story can only happen if she spirals down the way Nesta did or until she gets angry at their treatment of her. I think it's more important to respect that because Elain is so different from her sisters, the start of her book might look different than what some expect and maybe she's going to simply internalize her frustrations then talk it out with them in her book. If she's even harboring resentment. I mean, SJM already had Elain call Nesta out for treating her like a child, she joined the others in the Hewn City as "part of the court", and she was laughing when Nesta swore at her and nearly lost both Nesta and Feyre at the end of the book so maybe Elain isn't really worried about resenting her sisters right now, maybe she's just glad they're all safe and alive.

I do think Feyre and Nesta see certain aspects of Elain's personality but as all sisters do, I think sometimes they are blinded by other aspects. I also think they at times see her in a way that makes them feel better about things. Like Nesta assuming Elain was fine and settled at the start of SF only for Elain to remind them that she's struggling too. However, I do think Elain isn't truly Elain around them either, that she hides some of who she is. Like Rhys said, she may have been worried about disappointing them.

And yes, Elain has flaws (as they all do). It's funny that some will claim she's one dimensional while complaining about her flaws in the next breath. If she's canonically kind, loving and makes them all laugh at times while also being flawed....then how can she be one dimensional? I think it's because some are expecting her character to look like that of Feyre or Nesta's characters and the other badass female warriors in the series (or her other series). And that's a very narrow minded view, to only think someone is interesting if they look like every other single warrior heroine that SJM has written.

And despite her flaws, she has never lashed out at the other characters and I don't think she's given enough credit for that. She was afraid of the fae yet willingly opened up her home to them, has treated Feyre's found family with kindness from the start, made sure Feyre had a special cake for her birthday and has never blamed Feyre for what happened to her, held Feyre when Feyre was breaking down after Elain's kidnapping (so yes, I do think she has shown Feyre kindness ever since Feyre returned to the human lands in book 1).

Like you said, it's not that she's so much selfish as in "I do what I want regardless of how it affects others" so much as 1) she is more of an optimist and it's not easy for an optimist to understand a pessimists pov because optimists are constantly trying to focus on what's good and 2) she does seem to have a sense of her own worth and isn't going to beat herself down the way Nesta did, at least not to the extreme level did. She can still struggle with things while not self sabotaging. It's the same with Az and Lucien. Both Az and Lucien struggle with self worth and trauma but only one of the two is constantly trying to risk his life in foolish ways, arguing against orders, fixating on things he has no control over (i.e. Mor / mating bonds), brooding, distancing himself from the group. The other, despite his sadness, tries his best to focus on what he can control and I think that's Elain to a tee (T?).

And Elain has been open about the things she wants but she's never forced others to do them for her. For example, Nesta asked Elain whether she wanted to head to Prythian in book 2 or stay and Elain said she had to stay. Because she was engaged. So logically, it makes sense that she would. But never did she insist that Nesta had to stay with her, Nesta chose to stay. Elain should be allowed to make her own choices without someone calling her selfish.

I think she definitely could be labeled as selfish in the first two chapters of ACOTAR but I don't think we can say the same by the end of that first book. Some will claim Elain was selfish for bringing up their father to Nesta when, if she were observant as is claimed, she should have seen Nesta didn't want to talk about him, but.....Elain should be able to talk to her sister about their father because Elain lost him too. The trauma of their fathers death did not soley belong to Nesta (especially considering Elain actually loved him meaning she lost someone she was extremely close with) and while Nesta had a right to say she didn't want to talk about him, Elain is not wrong for attempting to bring him up in the first place.

And your comment:

"Ultimately I tell myself that it doesn’t matter how a character begins but rather how and what they grow into"

is hitting the nail on the head. Elain was meant to start in one place then grow from there but she's not going to grow into her full self until she's with the right people in the right place. I think the reason Elain's personality doesn't jump out to many is because she's not in the right place with the right people, just like Feyre wasn't fully herself in Spring and only came into who she was meant to be once she was in the NC. And maybe the reason there was more room for SJM to show us Nesta's personality was because as soon as Nesta ended up in the NC, she was with the right people in the right place. Her struggle came from letting go of her own self hatred but it was clear that she was free to be herself, even act out, because she belonged.

If Elain was super sassy, bubbly and outgoing in the Night Court then the entire narrative that SJM has built for her falls apart. She's got her full personality on mute because she's still waiting to find her own path with her own people and it's only then that her sisters will finally see her for all that she is too.

That's what I wish some in the fandom would understand about Elain. That they really shouldn't villain-ize a character for at times seeming odd and out of place, where she's in the background and not involved in the way the others because SJM has been hinting at her having to leave the NC before she can become true FMC energy. She's not going to have that energy before her book though even when she does, she's still going to be recognizable. She's still going to be loving and kind, she's still going to make friends easily, she's still going to want sunshine and nature. I think anyone trying to keep her in the NC tries to reason away the fact that they'd be sucking out a major part of her personality by claiming "Velaris has sunshine too! She can just avoid the Hewn City!" That's like saying someone can get the same sunshine in Alaska as they can the Bahamas.

But until it's time for her full arc, SJM has to keep Elain in a bit of a holding pattern since she's been driving home the narrative that she doesn't fit in where she's at. Elain isn't boring or worthless, she's just waiting for a reason to leave the NC and do her thing (again, something that won't happen until her book) and her individual journey can not be compared to Nesta's because no matter how much she fought it, Nesta always belonged in the NC and it was made clear to readers from the start.

#elucien #elain archeron #pro elain archeron

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tmmyhug · 9 months

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bestie (nicest way possible) as someone who was new to the fandom last September I wouldn’t recommend making a sideblog and like talking about comics/batfam/etc if you haven’t read the comics? people get really touchy about that, because fanfic interpretation tend to be really far from how characters are in canon (and character relationships get butchered and softened and straight up invented for plot, which once again, creative liberty + that can be fun but often tends to be incredibly ooc & excludes women (cass, helena, steph, etc) or poc (duke (though his case is different considering when he was introduced), cass, damian’s poc but isn’t really ignored) in favor of white boys (jason especially, who shows up far later than said women & isn’t really close to the fam yet fandom tends to give him their relationships with the family) so like...you’ll probably be mostly wrong and people are rather unforgiving about that because they’re tired of people that haven’t read comics talking about the characters (incorrectly) while refusing to interact w/ source material, and it’s a huge problem & very prevalent so I can’t really blame them? idk I just don’t think it’s a good idea unless you want to reblog just art and stuff, which is fine! but like...everything's really confusing w/out proper research if you want to get into the fandom (everything post-reboot/post-2011 is largely ignored unless said otherwise because the reboot was so awful), so i just want to point that out! but I don’t want to be mean, just some advice :) (if you ever change your mind about comics, just give the say so! we’re (and i) am very glad to help you out with what to read and in what order, and take it from someone who was in your position six months ago, they are truly really fun!) /gen /nm

not to worry my friend this sounds pretty much exactly like the dsmp experience where new people never properly interacted with the canon content and the fanon got more and more bastardized over time as a result and everyone got touchy abt it. including me . you could say im familiar . im just on the other side now (oblivious newbie) which should be interesting. i have no intention of treading on anyone’s toes or making assumptions or even talking abt the characters with any sort of authority. if i do make a sideblog it’ll be just to reblog art n stuff.

plus i am ah. very aware that the fanon im consuming is an extremely warped perspective of the actual comics. and with how many different “canons” there are i’m sure it’s a mess. at least in dsmp we could always point back to just the og streams. here i’m gathering there’s 174958637 comics + 284871 writers + movies + live action AND animated tv shows + multiple video games and they ALL have intersecting characters and possible canons it’s giving me a headache just thinking abt it dear lord

so yeah. i’m perfectly happy sequestering myself in an oblivious fanon corner and not claiming to know anything. normally for a new fandom i would seek out the full source material and examine it thoroughly but theres just. too much. and i also just don’t enjoy reading comics. at least not the superhero ones. (i think the art doesn’t appeal to me? and something about the combination of written word and still visual art like. rankles at my sense of pacing and story <- just guessing though) i did watch the under the red hood movie tjough and it was cool so i may do more of those!

i’m glad you said you like talking abt this cause i just wrote you a whole essay lol. if i may ask do you know of any good fanon/fanfic content i could check out that stays mostly true to the comics canon? i’m curious ! but regardless thank you for the very nice message and warning it’s appreciated mwah

#ask #anonymous #batstuff

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fluffybutt-7 · 1 year

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Hey fluff do you have advice on dating when having a um preferance like this? Im really bad at getting to know new people and im horrid at small talk unless it is something I am interested in. I tried grommr but had the experience of people wanting hook ups and or i would just get cold feet. Im almost 30 now and I realize how short life is and how much i want to at least try out being a feeder/mutal gainer with somebody, but its hard to get somewhere due to being in a bad location and not feeling really connected/ having friends in the gainer/encourgement space. It being kind of "taboo" to most people also kind of stresses me out. How did you get over your fear of being a gainer etc?

Hey there!

Sooo I’ve been trying to think of how to answer this. I think I’ll do it in two parts, one about dating and one in general.

When it comes to dating, I feel that it’s best to just be upfront about it IF it is something you feel safe doing. Wild things can happen, you never really know who you’re talking to when just meeting someone. So there’s a lot of nuance to the “just be upfront about it.” I often wait until I feel there could be a genuine chance with the person to bring it up (assuming they’re not part of the community), and even then I try to be careful with it. People can have all kinds of assumptions about this kink, so I always try to approach it while making the other person feel like they can ask questions about it and genuinely have a conversation about it. Sometimes I’ll kinda tease the idea before that point, it just depends on the vibe I’m getting from the person. But a well placed and ethical feedist comment can sometimes give insight into how the person would feel or possibly already feels about the kink. And honestly? More people are into it or at least open to it than I would expect. Be safe, and be clear in your communication when you feel that it is time to tell them. That’s how I approach it at least, I am certainly not the end-all-be-all and if anyone has something they would like to add, leave a comment so we can all learn how to navigate dating with this fetish/kink better. 🥰

Now - how did I get over my fear of being a gainer? That’s a pretty solid question. The answer I have may not be wholly relatable, but it’s the one that I think will convey my feelings best. I think it’s similar to when I came out as gay. I grew up in a verrry small, verrry conservative Midwest town, and I was the only out gay kid in my high school when I came out. It was fucking terrifying, but for once……. I was me. And holy FUCK I was happy. I felt untouchable, because at last there were no more secrets, no reason to hide. It didn’t matter if someone said shit, because I knew who the fuck I was and I knew I fought for my own happiness. I also knew that the people who really loved and cared for me would have my back, and they did. Well, most of them. But I guess those were the ones who didn’t really care, weren’t they? At the end of the day, we deserve to fight for our own happiness, whatever it is (as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone else or yourself, etc. I don’t wanna miss the nuance to that statement), and the people in our life who are really our people, the ones who will love us and accept us and celebrate us, will support us (see above parentheses) and have our back.

I also very much understand the struggle of being in a bad location and not feeling connected - I think maybe that’s one of the reasons I made this blog, so that those of us who feel isolated in this community can start to feel like… a community. You can certainly count me as a friend. ☺️ I hope somehow this helped, and I apologize for rambling a bit lmao. Feel free to message anytime! I may not respond right away but I always try to respond to my messages here. Hope you have a good night. :)

#fluffybutt-7 #fluffstuff #askthefluff #gay gainer #male weight gain

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poohwhin · 11 months

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|| My Ocs From Different Fandoms

tagged by: @fruit-of-infidelity

tagging: no one bc my friends have all already been tagged >:( but if you see this: DO IT 🔫

HI HI HI. I HAVE MILLIONS OF OCS THAT I CARE FOR AND LOVE VERY VERY MUCH, EVEN IF I DONT HAVE DEDICATED BLOGS FOR THEM! (and those that have been forgotten bc i’ve become unhappy with them, bUT THATS NOT THE POINT! ANYWAYS!)

Also this art I’ve found is OLD. eat my ass /lh

Also (x2)! A few of these were made in sort of a story I’d sometimes talk abt with a friend! But since we don’t talk much anymore, I’ve kind reworked my ocs into their own thing. (or made an attempt to without just completely redoing them).

(I won’t ramble too much these it but I want to pls enable me to do so)

I. Virek Sutcliffe (Diabolik Lovers)

Are: 18

Species: Human

Pronouns: He/Him

Desc. AHHHH MY SWEET BABY BOY. Probably my most known oc idk. BUT YEAH. he acts as an alternate protagonist after you complete all the contact in the More, Blood game :D He’s a former experiment, who ended up in Kaminashi completely by chance. It’s the similar case of “wrong place, wrong time”, except with Virek comes a lot more chaos than usual. My entire purpose for him was to incite more animosity between the families, and indirectly cause Karl’s plans to absolutely fail. (which in the end he’s happy about bc he hates that guy).

but yeah. he’s a silent, odd, and downright IRRELEVANT and MISSABLE character, but so much so that he attracts chaos and eeriness and just freaks some of these guys out in the worst way. yeah :) (no art bc im still redesigning him).

II. Rowhin (Diabolik Lovers)

Age: 19

Species: Questionable!

Pronouns: They/Them

Desc. It’s a self insert imma be so honest. Its a s/i for richter bc i am down TREMENDOUSLY and delusional 😞 They act as a servant for them bc they met him at a convenient time. Technically they’re supposed to be helping him advance his plans to reunite with Cordelia. But you know. things don’t go that way and those two silly fucks end up catching a tiny teaspoon of feelings. (In which Richter will never actually admit bc it’s RICHTER. but i’m delusional and greedy so i can do what i want 🙄🤷)

(no art bc i hate my previous designs; drawing myself makes me so picky).

III. Avard (Genshin Impact)

Age: Not specific (between 20 and 30)

Species: Human

Vision: Anemo

Origins: Khaenri’ah (birth), Monstadt (raised)

Desc: Yes ik I said his vision is anemo but in the photo is cryo. there’s a reason for that its bc he’s faking that’s not his. ANYWAYS. Bro’s technically from Khaenri’ah, but remembers absolutely nothing (and probably never will)— So he doesn’t consider it home since he has no connection to it.

Instead he was raised by a father and son in Springvale. But unfortunately after getting in between a father/son quarrel and trying to prevent it from escalating, he obtained a vision ‼️ and ofc nothing goes right and he couldn’t actually gain control over it, so he did de-escalate it. his adoptive father and newfound best friend died 🤷

so he ran away, changed his appearance and his name, and became sort of a scholar?? not really. he just wants to find some kind of answer as to why he feels out of place. he’s one of those characters that’s on the road with traveler a lot, but doesnt actually get involved unless it’s useful for him.

IV. Khalid (Genshin Impact)

Age: Not specific (mid 20s — early 30s)

Origins: Sumeru

Vision: Electro

Pronouns: Hey/They

Desc: Bro’s a ghost. Okay not like. Fr a ghost. But he’s like. NEVER SEEN?? He had one terrible day during early akademiya days and said “guess i’ll die” /j. He’s technically a Haravatat scholar, despite his methods of doing things being more fitted for Rtawahist; he just joined the former bc it had the least amount of students to worry about.

He keeps to himself mostly, rarely every actually being seen at the Akademiya. (he’s there he just. doesn’t wanna be noticed 😭 people do NOT like this man). People also refuse to believe that he’s the author behind all of these genuinely well done and thought out articles bc they think he’s a wacko, whatever. 😭 Bro refuses most of his summons unless he feels like coming, and just spends time stargazing, thats if. Bro’s a nerd 😞

Oh also his vision story is very stupid. Bro electrocuted himself with a toaster one day, said fuck it, and found his vision lying on his doorstep whenever he went outside again.

V. Zone (One Piece)

Age: Late 20s

Species: Human

Affiliation: Marines

Devil Fruit: None

Pronouns: He/They

Desc. Bro’s just a marine idk what to tell you. NAH BUT ‼️ He used to be affiliated w Doflamingo’s crew. But after a friend he made turned him over to the marines as a kid (they didn’t wanna see him grow up to be like Doffy. as they should’ve) Zone was just raised to be a marine.

Which is like cool whatever. Yada yada bro grows up training w them. BUT THEN WHENEVER HE TURNS LIKE?? 23?? BRO GETS DRAFTED INTO THE SAME DIVISION SMOKER IS IN AND LOSES HIS MIND 😭 Bro is aggressively homosexual for captain smoker and that is his ONLY personality trait /j

nah but he’s one of those people who’s super loud, energetic, and obnoxious. but then when he’s fighting or focused he’s eerily quiet. everyone’s like “damn i guess he can be serious.” (they take those words back as soon as work is finished).

VI. Nero (Fandomless)

Age: Unknown, (early to mid 20s physically)

Species: Vampire

Pronouns: They/He

Desc. Previously a DL oc, i made him fandomless just for my own mental health. BUT! Nero is a Vampire & an artist. He specialises in painting and sculpting, and has made some of the most beautiful things the underworld has ever seen. Except none are marketed as his.

He was taken in by a prominent family of artists, who are going through a dilemma when the eldest son just ABSOLUTELY SUCKS. So in exchange for a home, and the ability to do what he likes, he acts as a secret proxy for the eldest. But yada yada things happen and an ‘accident’ ends up taking place, and Nero is taken in by someone else. Bro has to regain his love for the arts again, while also learning to be treated as something MORE than just a set of hands to make things :). (also i hate this design sm i wanna change it).

VII. Rook (Fandomless)

Age: Unknown

Species: Also Unknown

Pronouns: Literally make them up Rook does NOT care

Desc. There’s not much too Rook other than them being a jester who pulls lethal silly pranks by trapping people in playing cards and swapping them around! Nah but to be completely serious, i love playing around w just full fantastical and magical characters, and Rook is one of them. Bro is technically a criminal, but hey they’re a jester you can’t arrest them!!!! it’s just a joke!!!

They wander around to every which place and just have a grand ‘ole time toying with people. But sometimes they will trap you inside of a playing card and use you for a trick! You may die! But it’s fine it’s just a joke!!!—

Oh! And they don’t speak. They only jingle. They got jingly shoes, jingly hat. Yeah. (also idk if that is a mask, or just their face. Make smth up).

IX. Bonnie (Fandomless)

Age: mid 20s

Species: Human

Pronouns: They/Them

Desc: I don’t have a drawn out design for them, but I do have some general thoughts!! They live on a planet who’s population is incredibly advanced. BUT! Their basically a nobleman im a highly futuristic society, that has a general distaste of cyborgs. (Even minor things like bionic limbs). Unfortunately for them, they have a bionic eye (well its more like those things you see in dragon ball. but whatever) 🤷. Oops, big ‘ole issue when you’re the child of a man who has to run an entire planet’s population‼️

VIII. Pyro (Fandomless)

Age: 26-ish (probably older??)

Species: Alien (humanoid, technically. but he is supposed to be a fire guy)

Pronouns: Hey/They (wouldn’t care if any others are used though).

Companion: Kalixo (added him bc i love this little dude and him and Pyro are a PACKAGE DEAL)

Desc: In the same universe as Bonnie ‼️ He’s a fire-oriented alien from a planet of different elemental guys, who each specialise in their own type of art. His specifically being welding/engineering. Unfortunately bro’s planet was DECIMATED when he was a child, BUT DON’T LOSE HOPE— he can just rebuild it 🙄 bc building is what he does 🙄 he’s just a funny, silly, heart on his sleeve guy who adores building.

Like Bonnie, he also has bionic body parts :D specifically mechanical legs! As a kid, he had a condition that made his legs increasingly weaker as he grew, so being the amateur master craftsman he was, he just made himself new ones. AND they’re fire powered because he’s cool 🤷 ( also his human form isnt what he actually looks like. his family specifically just chooses it bc fire is scary to others!)

ALSO! HE HAS A CAT. bro has a cat named Kalixo, who’s just a wandering spirit that likes being a cat form and being lazy and doted on. bro met pyro bc pyro was DUMB and ran into him (kicked him) by accident and cried for hours. Now he follows him around and acts as a voice of reason to keep pyro from being too STUPID.

X. Ezekiel (Fandomless)

Age: Unknown (thousands of years old)

Species: Vampire

Pronouns: He/Him

Desc. A lot of my followers came here from DL, so vampires should be your thing. HOWEVER! EZEKIEL HERE IS A BIG ‘OLE BABY. A vampire who refuses to drink blood from humans, because be doesn’t want to put himself, or anyone else, in that kind of vulnerable position. He also: is a recluse. Seriously, a HERMIT. He holds himself up in an abandoned library that full of spirits and ghosts, and does not LEAVE.

He also doesn’t speak. He passes notes. And if you somehow stumble in he will HIDE FROM YOU and maybe throw paper balls at you until you leave :3

#ramblings ahead bc oopsie #these descriptions are so ass btw im very sleeby #my eyes are like — —#god i hate my old art this shit sucks >:(#also that zone screenshot is from MAY of 2022 😟😟#eugh #also i have female ocs i promise i just dont wanna dig around for the art of them 😞#i found all these by CHANCE #anyways #more rambles #i love how genshin vision stories are always like #‘oh they just got one’#or #some TRAUMATIC ASS EVENT 😭

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womperchomp · 3 months

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VENT

my doctor said i was on the waitlist for surgery 13 months ago. i waited 5 months thinking i was on it, she said that it might be a bit longer than usual. thats fine atleast im on it. i go to my doctor to find out i wasn’t referred. well whatever i guess. now i am for sure. i wait 8 months and nothing. nothing? why is it taking so long. i ask others what they think i should do. they couldn’t have messed up twice. that would be insane. i am going insane. thinking that what if im not on the list. i went to my doctor today to find that my gut was right, that unfortunately it usually is with things. i just never trust it. third times the charm though, right? i already waited two almost three years of going to a psychologist and counselling to a point they found me acceptable mentally to be safe getting it and going on T. not including this fiasco. its been so long. i have such bad luck. i just want to cry

i get it i do. people make mistakes im just the lucky guy who gets to experience those mistakes and i get the repercussions .. it’s not fine or okay. it has to be though. i have been so patient. people told me i had nothing to worry about. i overthink a lot and i get paranoid and anxious. why am i always right though. in the end. one end im going through all that then my other doctor with my main health issues and all its taken the same damn amount to even be taken seriously … why is advocating for yourself so difficult and why is the medical business so fucking hard to even get heard anyway. im tired of it all. i want to be heard. no one understands. thats what it feels like at least.

i imagine myself falling sinking into an abyss never to be seen again. maybe im not in a as bad of a place as i used to be, no. i cant really tell if im surviving. someone told me i was thriving now. am i? i cant tell. i think i distract myself so much so i dont get a chance. my brain still yearns to die. even if i feel happy. i can’t articulate why. this world doesn’t feel right for me. maybe its because the world is full of ableist people and privileged ones that decide what to do. leaving those out they dont think of. nor care about. i have to get out of my way to do anything really. i have to push myself so much harder. i yearn for something that will never exist, not a life that is easy, a life that is liveable. i dont know how to describe it. so in the end death comes easiest than trying to carve out something good. not that i would ever really show or tell anyone how i feel. theres no point.

#transgender #vent #doctors #testosterone #ftnb #top surgery #disability #disabled

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louisisalarrie · 27 days

Note

hey hey, hope you're well and those nasty hate anons're leaving you alone!

i've been thinking about the harry coming out as bi theory from back in 2015 with xander (i saw a post on tumblr a few days ago lol) and there is a lot of talk about how louis wouldn't come out without harry but like, would harry really come out without louis?

it seems so... unbalanced? one sacrificing ones own freedom for someone who would be willing to come out with someone else? idk if i'm reading something wrong or misunderstand something and maybe i'm projecting my own issues onto this situation (i've been in this same situation before and it ended badly for me so)

anyway, if or when L&H (together ir separately) come out, i personally only see it happening with a big bang and tell all. with all the shit going on the past 14 years, all the influential people involved,, like i guess what i'm getting here is, do you (with your knowledge) think theres another way? one that could be happening relatively soon (like next 5 years) or is it gonna be a retirement thing? meaning when they've retired theyre just like "yo btw"

another question: do you think they want to come out?

Heya anon!

First off, and most importantly, i am so so sorry to hear you had a negative experience like that. I hope you know you’re wonderful and loved and deserve the very best 🧡

And secondly, welcome to the show!

That post that you’re referencing, i do strongly believe that theory. It makes perfect sense as to the shift in Harry’s behaviour, and confidence, and i think it fits really well into watching him grow over the years, and how mgmt we’re gonna seed it. And then… it all just stopped. Anyway, it’s a great post if you haven’t read it!

So, let’s discuss this from the info we have, and the knowledge we have of Louis and Harry as people, and their sticky situation. Coming out is different for everyone, and everyone has their own time when they’re ready, and i am in no way invalidating anyone’s personal experiences with coming out with this post. I’m not going to assume exactly what they think and want, but i will put my two cents in and base it off what i think is best for them in a career sense, and their relationship to be strong after the official come out.

Okie dokie, with that in mind, let’s get right to it!

Louis did wear a big chunk of their relationship being closeted through Simon. I am in no way saying Harry had it easier, but Louis was older, and Simon saw that Harry would hang off Louis’ every word and action. He saw the dynamic, we all did, and if you were in Simon’s situation, you’d get Louis to sort it out, right? At the nip of the bud, you choose the 18 year old to get the 16 year old to do what you want them to do, because he looks up to Louis. Louis can guide him by being older and wiser and more of a dominant personality. The obvious choice was Louis, and starting there. And Simon did.

That day after the wonderful gay club show, Louis was flown out directly to Simon’s place in LA or whatever mansion he was in at the time, and chastised the fuck out of him. Hes said that before. Harry and Louis were all over each other that night, and they were so damn happy. But Simon doesn’t fly them both out to settle this, he just flies louis out. He puts Louis in a position where he’s telling Harry what to do, rather than chastising them as a team (which im sure he did at other times, but anyway, this is the stem).

So, sweet little Harry as he lives and breathes, is trying to be all in for Louis, and Louis is making sure he doesn’t overstep the boundaries. We’ve seen it a heap of times, and that’s really important to note. Louis did the denials, Louis had the long term gf, and Louis dealt directly with Simon, more so than Harry, i imagine. Harry had to have the womaniser image so he was always busy with that, and Louis had to have the commitment so they were never single at the same time (until all of the members were coincidentally single at the same time which was amazing hahaha).

So, we can already see the imbalance there, with proof. Anyway, as Harry grows into a more flamboyant person and starts wearing gucci and louder colours etc., people are already questioning his sexuality. He’s this sexy, charming man, with an image of already having a lot of partners, so it was easier to believe if he came out and was “experimenting”, rather than being in a long term het relationship. You get what im saying?

So, out of the two of them, it seems more likely that Harry comes out. He gets a lot of press, larries are getting excited, but also, Larry gets mentioned a few times in the media around 2015, during this Xander and H thing. And while Harry is the “frontman”, gets all the attention and we can already see how much of a superstar he is and mgmt/the Azoffs can see a very successful solo career for him, he’s allowed to be a bit ambiguous. Bring up the ratings, keep things fun and sexy and exciting. Even during One Direction, Louis just wasn’t as popular to the GP. so, it’s an easy choice. Harry.

(Also Harry is louis’ baby and he’d want to protect him at all costs and let him be free over his own happiness)

My bet is mgmt wouldn’t let them come out together at the same time bc that’s too much of a scandal, but also it exposes them. It’s a compromise. But, it doesn’t end up following through and Louis’ stuck with a stunt until the time is right and Harry is continued to be seen with every leggy gal who needs a bit of promo. The narrative was changing, and the seeding for Harry back then has even worked now. He’s so much more free. So, yeah. He’s a lot more free to do what he wants, and he also doesn’t have a kid tied to him. Unfair? Yes. But i believe Louis did do this whole thing for the sake of Harry, and mgmt wanted it to be Harry.

Now, about how they’ll come out… i mean… a tell all would be great, but they’ll be sued by a million folks who still hold a great deal of money and power over them. I truly don’t think a tell all will happen for a long time. It doesn’t seem plausible to me right now. And the thing is… if mgmt hadn’t have dealt them any stunts, and let them be single the whole time, they could’ve come out way sooner and been like “yeah we’re dating and we didn’t want to make it public” and get away without the whole forcible closeting thing. It would’ve been a smart move. But it’s all in the name of PR, and relationships and sightings of the boys with girls make money.

Anyway, who knows. They might break and just say fuck it and do it. But with budding careers, they need to be smart about this. Harry is at the height of his career (i think his absence from everything right now is very smart btw), and Louis is on the rise. They have to end the bbg thing (I’ve talked about my theories on this before and how best to end it, and i think i should probably send it to mgmt to save their asses), because I don’t think Louis would wanna be tied to that for the rest of his life.

However, Harry and Louis are enemies to the GP right now. So they’re gonna have to seed a friendship, then a relationship, and it’s gonna be a much longer process than a big bang. Depends on how savvy both their marketing teams are. But also, Harry is kinda.. halfway out? People don’t really believe he’s straight. Hes not yet given himself an official title to the public (he doesn’t have to), but he’s got one foot out of the closet. Louis is still stuck in fucking Narnia at the moment.

So if Harry wants to wait until louis can come out and they do it together, that’s great, but absolutely nothing about louis’ sexuality has been seeded. I think even at this point in his career it’s not gonna get much attention from the public, and bbg is still hanging over his head. So it’s kinda like… Harry is halfway out with a hell of a lot more freedom but hasn’t officially come out, who knows? Maybe he is waiting for Louis? Or he’s just enjoying the ambiguous nature of it all. He doesn’t have to announce anything and he’s on top of the world. Most people are seeing him for who he is.

Louis is just so focused on his career right now that I don’t think he’s pushing for the same amount of freedom. He’s trying to make a name for himself and a solo career that separates him from the idea that he’s “riding Harry’s coattails” or whatever tf people will say if they came out as dating. So I think he’s super focused on doing what he loves, and yeah. He’s not as fussed right now. And he’s still in a sticky situation with bbg, so he’s doing what he can to hint at us that he’s still there and thinking about it and it’ll happen, but not right now.

I truly think they both do wanna come out, even if it doesn’t seem like a priority for Louis rn, and Harry is kinda halfway there. It’s a weird little awkward timing for them I think. And don’t get me wrong, I want them to do whatever makes them happy and what’s right for their careers, but until we get some serious seeding and not just stuff larries pick up, it won’t happen.

Unless yeah, a big drop of everything and they expose everyone. Stranger things have happened. But it jeopardises their careers and networks big time.

Anyway, this turned way longer than I thought, and I probably repeated myself a bunch bc im exhausted from work, but if you have any specific questions about what I said, you’re more than welcome to send through! These big topics are always hard to grasp anything. Damn, im still rambling. Sorry, and thank you anon! Big love to you x

#anon #answered #bbg #stunts

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macarensesangles · 2 months

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this is DID stuff and it’s far more personal than im normally willing to put here and im not really asking for anybody to read it or anything (i may even delete it later) bc im still too scared to talk about this directly to anybody right now but i need somewhere to organize my thoughts and this blog is where i feel most safe and comfortable

it’s just. goddd

back in 2022 i had been worried i was polyfragmented and i guess came to the. I actually don’t know what conclusion i came to. my friends i talked about it to seemed pretty convinced i was but i didn’t like the idea very much and i don’t really remember what came of it beyond that i guess i must have tried to stop thinking about it

occasionally the worry comes back but i usually go and read definitions and experiences other people have until i feel convinced it’s not possible and then try to ignore it again. i always feel stupid for worrying. i just don’t think what happened to me was bad enough for that to happen, i feel like much worse things would have to happen to me.

i have started worrying about it again and don’t know how to calm down. i worry about it because i feel like i as a part am kind of separate parts but not really, like a 1a-within-DID situation almost, and then there’s a second layer around that of parts that are me but not really but they’re more separate with their own names and stuff, and some of them i don’t know anything about and it’s confusing. and then outside of that there’s the other other parts, like introjects who are furthest possible from me. it used to be that i would have some introjected parts that didn’t have a lot going on that would show up for a short period and leave. before i knew i had DID i felt like that was the case with the cast of märchen, and they all felt like a subcategory underneath him that had nothing to do with me.

even if those things contribute, i haven’t had lots of small “flat” parts in a very long time. i don’t have those same issues anymore aside from the nesting doll thing i feel about myself. and that doesn’t really mean anything. and i try not to worry about numbers because that makes this worse, but i don’t have lots of parts at all, i have barely any that show up frequently and am too confused to count the other ones and to me those don’t count much anyway. and as far as i’m aware i don’t split easily. if i did i would have lots of parts. and the stuff about having a lot that were kind of flat introjects a long time ago feels embarrassing and like it doesn’t even have anything to do with me anyway because that was like, so many years ago that i feel like it’s not technically even me. (bc I feel sometimes like every couple of years or so i get “replaced” which is too hard to explain but it’s like, after a certain amount of time lots of things from a long time ago feel like a different person’s memories and lose relevance to me.)

i think im probably being silly. i worry about it because i feel like polyfragmented Means Something about how bad those bad events were, but it doesn’t mean anything like that, it’s just symptoms. and if i don’t have them i don’t have them. and i don’t WANT to have them anyway because it does feel like it would just mean everything is worse and scarier than i thought. i should be HAPPY and count myself lucky this does not apply to me instead of being ridiculous and worrying it might for years on end. it makes me feel dramatic and stupid.

#tag for complaining

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moonsquaremars · 8 months

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Why can’t I fix him?

Why is my love not enough? He had feelings for me. That is unarguable. his borderline personality disorder must have kicked in. maybe he was scared, felt unloveable. scared i would abandon him. so he self sabotaged cuz that was the safer bet for him.

but didn’t he see how understanding i was? how much i wanted to take care of him? didn’t he see the stars in my eyes, the expression of pure happiness just lying next to him?

maybe he got greedy. maybe he didn’t want to be tied down. saw how happy i made him, and figured he could do better. get more. have more sex with others. maybe i made him feel too attractive and desirable.

his hypocrisy. watching my grindr usage. sending me snarky remarks on a burner account. replying “who else” when i told him i loved him. i would have pushed every one to the side for him. i mean that. whenever i used the same tricks he used on me, it became an issue.

& he never said i love you back. started calling me codependent. he’s probably right there, but it takes two to tango.

the fact he has a history of this. dating violence. always preying on skinny young twinks with “daddy issues”. who doesn’t have daddy issues. it’s really not fair to reduce love and sexual attraction to that. it is what it is. not one person has a perfect relationship with both their parents. what is the use in trying to distort the pure love and happiness he provided me.

you told me you didn’t ask for another chance. you didn’t ask for me to give you the benefit of the doubt. harsh, true. am i a fool for giving it to you?

i won’t be a fool for letting you get away with this. the people of your past may not have held you accountable with the law. but i will. im not letting you push me around. break my phone and my heart, and walk away feeling like top dog who can do and have whatever he wants.

you had me big guy. and i had you. those seven weeks feel like a dream that i never want to wake up from. we could have built a life. i wanted so desperately to build a life with you.

you asked how i would kill you when we were joking around about that stuff. i said i wouldn’t, because i wanted to live with you. live.

that answer surprised even me. im dark, twisted. have a cruel sense of humor at times. but i don’t act on those thoughts. i can resist those impulses. i don’t want that for my life. i guess you’re not the same in that regard.

i believe everyone is a good person. turns out people aren’t as simple as that. there is part of you that is good. but that part hid away, and someone new is now in your body. i don’t know if it’s from your drug use, or bpd. i don’t know what it is.

it really doesn’t matter to me anymore, since we’ll never ever be together anymore. and that is what im mad about most. the fact you’re probably one of the most handsome men i’ve ever seen. the list goes on the ways you turned me on.

we were such a good match. but now it’s over. and you ruined all chances of there being something more. and that’s what makes me want to hate you. i wish i could hate you.

my error was thinking you wanted better for yourself. my error was assuming we had similar goals and outlooks on life. in many ways we did. and the fact you were such an asshole kinda turned me on. but you’re vicious and cruel, even to someone who loves you.

i don’t know what went wrong to make you this way. i wish i knew. i wish i could change it. i wish i could go back in time, and prevent whatever happened to make you this way.

you were my dream. and now you’re my nightmare. and i hate the idea that now i’m gonna have to spend my life with somebody else. if i survive you. and that we didn’t get enough time together.

#codependant #i guess #recovering codependent

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tetsuskei · 4 months

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risu loved your hot take about smut.

also is it just me or like writing smut has always been relatively easier than fluff or even suggestive banter type shit? because in smut, you can bullet point- yeah they gonna do this and this and this and call it a day but fluff requires some depth. a perfect setting for the fluff or angst to actually be enhanced.

And according to each author’s writing style, they have to add imagery, or like metaphors or engaging dialogues to make it work. For me, when I was writing suggestive/banter related fics for kuroo or gojo, I was staring at the screen in despair so that my brain conjures some smart words or a perfect setting for them to act on. So it was relatively harder for me. And if other authors have faced such similar challenges and yet post majority sfws, you can guess the amount of hardwork they’ve put into it and would love for any sort of appreciation of their work. And

Im not downplaying smut authors by any means, every piece of writing takes up a fair share of effort and even I’ve had my fair share of challenges in writing smut too because firstly I experience high key embarrassment proofreading it and secondly, good smut requires the same criteria too (it’s just sfw fics gets the floor to portray a reader’s personality more than its nsfw counterpart) it’s just we want the audiences to interact with these posts with the same enthusiasm and not read and toss it aside :((

to our dear readers, Lores are fun. Just get yourself out of that sex bubble and you’ll see why a simple fic of having breakfast with nanami in scotland is actually so much fun to read and enjoy

happy reading!!

sami thank u for sending this! providing my thoughts under the cut.

i honestly am shocked by how many ppl commented on that. (someone said i was ‘insulting the intelligence of those who only read smut’ and was being ‘misogynistic’. i didn’t intend to do that, and think my words were taken out of context by that point, but it is what it is now.)

i do agree that with smut if i have an idea of the dynamic i want and what the characters might be into, i can plan a course of action for what is going to happen. sometimes i start w smut and then incorporate the plot later tbh.

you’re absolutely right, there’s nothing wrong with reading and writing smut. no one is any better if they don’t read smut than those who do. personally my comment was only towards the select who constantly intake content on here and aren’t always careful about what they read. even heavily more so towards the porn link posts too. hence why my original comment said ‘some’ because obviously it doesn’t apply to everyone.

i really do admire those who are able to world build so fluently and with great detail whether that is in smut or not. i agree with your point that it may be a bit more complicated to build a story without smut if you’re focusing more on characterization, personality, and setting. smut pieces that bring this to the table seem like the longer ones for the most part, but that doesn’t mean shorter ones can’t either. also i know it’s another tricky thing to mention is how people go about making their reader with personality or not bc ppl complain anyway anyhow when there’s something they can’t identify with.

at the end of the day i just wish to keep supporting ppls writing in general but also wish the tumblr community was more friendly like it used to be. a lot of ppl seem discouraged lately about their writing and i hope that things can get better soon.

(btw breakfast with nanami in scotland sounds heavenly! pls sign me up immediately <3)

#tw discourse #just to be fair

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atherix · 2 years

Note

ITS TIME TO SCREAM AGAIN I AM CRACKING MY FINGERS I AM TYPING IN A WORD DOC LETS GO. @ your lovely readers I need you all to know I read this at 7 in the morning and it is the sole reason I even woke up bc atherix SENT ME A DM BEING LIKE ‘You’re welcome’ WITH NO CONTEXT BUT I KNEW! I KNEW!!!

God the combination of the current agitation with the previous peace is such a good parallel to how Past worked as a little buffer between the previous parts of Midnight and now, how things are starting to really ramp up rapidly. But also – who did take the picture? Gem? The Beans? Grian or Mumbo? So many options. Well I guess it cant be Grian or Mumbo since he’s actively wondering who took the photo unless Mumbo was hanging around during the staff carving without Grian which I doubt. And it’s such a small thing too and yet it feels so normal in the middle of this just utter chaos that is the three of them almost dying. [The four of them, I saw how Scar looked. Well. Read. Saw. You get me.]

AND THEN THE SPLIT SECOND WHERE GRIAN THINKS SCAR MIGHT FOLLOW THE WATCHERS? DIRECTLY FOLLOWING GRIAN LOOKING AT THESE PEACEFUL PHOTOS?????/ THE PARALLELS AT PLAY HERE FHSKJFLK And that split second of Grian being like “No no no nononono-“ god I’m so happy they’re gonna talk next chapter, it’s a very good thing Grian didn’t act on his immediate instinct to panic and instead actually used his brain for longer than a second, but oh my god. It is a good thing they’re going to talk. I need them to talk. I need Grian to s p i l l because to some extent he’s spilt sure, but scar and mumbo have said SO much more than he’s said even to just mumbo or you know. Us. The readers. And lkgshfd I need them to TALK about it oh my god and then also the way grian goes ‘it doesn’t matter I trust scar’ and puts it back sadklgsd esp coupled with how he and Scar argue later in the story I am screaming. Also this part – “because he’s not an Observant anymore, either. Maybe in more ways than one, he thinks.” YEAH, GRIAN. YEAH. A LITTLE BIT. ‘Godling’. Whatever.

The way he’s compelled to look at this thing though, at the last page? I am FROTHING at the mouth for watcher stuff oh my god. That whole passage hit me right in the religious trauma. I may have made notes. Ahem. “to Judge and Weigh the hearts of those who threaten thy Chosen” So I’m gonna scream about this until you tell us what the chosen is. BTW. “This is what it means to be a Watcher, and this Pantheon shall not entertain the Wretched Gods who turn their backs on these Tenets” Grian ‘I don’t remember this part in the book/I don’t remember the watchers acting according to their tenets’ BABY WHY DO YOU THINK YOU KILLED THEM. ALSO. TERRIFIED FOR THE MULTIPLE IMPLICATIONS IN THE TENETS FOR GRIAN. BTW. I SEE YOU. “Observe that which does not belong to thee” I SEE YOU and the way it tells him to find his PEOPLE and it seems to be speaking directly TO HIM IM!!!!!!! The fact that he answers his own question in a sense because he makes sure to point out they’re his family. His people. His place.

ALSO THE FACT THAT THIS THE FIRST TIME GRIAN HAS FLOWN SINCE HE WAS CLIPPED AND ITS TO GO DO SOMETHING TO IRREVOCABLY STUPID THAT I WANT TO SHAKE HIM LIKE A BAG OF DRIED BEANS!!!! GRIAN!!!! I DON’T WANT YOU TO DIE BUT FRANKLY THIS IS DUMB ENOUGH THAT YOU DESERVED THE ABSOLUTE SCARE ON YOUR LIFE BLONDIE FUCKING GAVE YOU TO BE HONEST!!!!!!! Oh and I love that while he’s doing this ridiculously dumb thing he’s also being smart about how he gets into the house IM GONNA THROTTLE HIM!!!! FRANKLY SCAR MIGHT ALSO THROTTLE HIM BASED ON HIS REACTION LATER ON-

Speaking of Scar, the little signs that he’s been in the manor more and more, that he’s *theirs* and they are *his* is so asladksh I am in love. Especially considering this whole chaotic day started with them trying to get the sunroom together to surprise Scar. I am emotional about it. AND THEY WAY IT LENDS HIMSELF TO GRIAN REALLY LEANING INTO HIS POSSESSIVE STREAK, WHICH I GESTURE ABOVE BACK TO THE TENETS ABOUT, MIND YOU.

ASDGFSH; Grian. Sweetie. I am throttling you personally. ‘Coming here alone was stupid’ YEAH IT WAS, TURN AROUND AND GO BACK OUT THE WINDOW, BUT NOOOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOOOO WE GOTTA GO INTO THE KITCHEN AND FACE DOWN THE STARVING VAMPIRE WHO TOLD YOU YOU HAD GODLING BLOOD BC YOU WANT ANSWERS! Picture me absolutely shaking him. Speaking of the vampire, the way Blondie MANGLED their home as a reflection of how she mangled them too. Christ. She drives me insane in the worst way, that’s their HOME- [Mumbo get silver out of your HOME I AM ALSO THROTTLING HIM!!!!!]

This show down though is worth the absolute throttling I want to give Grian. The way he’s thinking about the blood she’s wasting of Mumbos, how he’s worried about his mates, their home, their son. Mm mm mm. Could he have done it better yes. 100% But the way Blondie wrecks him and threatens him and he doesn’t back down means so much to me. This bird drives me insane. And then also this little slip of this new instinct – the wrong wrong wrong [Between you and Mochi the way you have both utilized this is making me FROTH at the MOUTH I am an oversteamed LATTE SDKLGHSFD], the way he also tried to see Blondie without actually seeing her [im assuming that’s what the pressure in the back of his mind was] oh he is SO close to awakening you are going to drive me INSANE.

The way the scent of blood on Blondie makes Grian recoil because he’s seen her take it before without permission and knows that she is like, a nasty vampire, as opposed to Mumbo who has only ever taken blood he had permission for [And I assume isn’t so fucking MESSY] is such a great perpendicular image oh my god. Here are these two creatures who are the same creature and yet they are so different.

“But I will be” SENT SHIVERS DOWN MY SPINE! HE BOTH DOES AND DOES NOT KNOW WHAT HE’S SAYING. I WANT TO SHAKE HIM AGAIN!!!! “He doesn’t want to be a God. He just wants to be Grian.” Wheres that why not both gif. ESPECIALLY CONSIDERING THAT BLONDIE REVEALS THAT BC THERE’S ONLY ONE WAY GODLINGS ARE MADE GRIAN DID IT TO HIMSELF – SHE HAS NO IDEA [Or what little she does know I cant imagine it went that in depth] AND ITS DRIVING ME OVER A CLIFF!!!! OH MY GOD I cannot stress enough how happy I am that next ch they are TALKING bc yeah ‘I killed my gods mumbo’ happened but like I truly do not think that’s fully processed in the wet cat of a vampire.

And the fact that she got SO close to doing to Grian what she did to Scar but Mumbo is there to stop it this time makes me INSANE. Mumbo, who watched his wife die. Mumbo, who’s had Scar drank from, had Grian kidnapped because of his blood, had to deal with far too much of Blondie, showing up just a second before she really gets Grian proper. YEAH NO WONDER THE MAN IS LIVID, GRIAN I am shaking him again. Frankly. IT’S A GOOD THING MUMBO HAS BEEN PRACTICING HIS MAGIC. I MEAN. I KNOW HE PRACTICED IT BC HE KNEW HE NEEDED TO PROTECT HIS COVEN BUT HO BOY IT’S A GOOD THING HE PRACTICED HIS MAGIC.

What on earth is the book Tubbo is holding. I’m putting this here to hold on to this thought I’ll get back to this in a bit –

THE FACT THAT MUMBO FEELS GUILTY THAT HE DIDN’T WAKE UP TO HEAR GRIAN SLIPPING OUT TO DO HIS DUMBEST STUNT – YEAH. YEAH. GRIAN DESERVES THE GUILT EATING HIM UP A BIT FOR THIS ONE TBH. Like not to the point of self-deprecative destruction but just a little guilt eating. As a treat.

Sidenote I just got an idea for a monster that eats emotions

AND THEN! THE MOMENT IVE BEEN WAITING FOR! I feel like everyone needs to know that I have been referring to Blondie holding onto Tubbo as a meat shield and a beverage as ‘Capri Sunning’ him. AND IT WAS EVERYTHING. The way she teleports to a bunch of different places to disorient them. The way they have to VERY QUICKLY face the fact that yep. Yep. They see Tubbo as their son. He’s the coven child and she’s GOT him. SDLKFHWG. Very proud of both of them for realizing she was absolutely lying to them about exchanging Tubbo for anybody. Why give up her meat shield. Look at them using their brain cells. And then they immediately stop using their brain cells to dart after a woman who can teleport. I get it. Tubbo is in danger and distress. BUT ITS LIKE THE BRAINCELLS JUST FLEW OUT W THE SCREAMING. Which is what I deserve to be honest. ‘Looks too much like she took a literal bite out of him’ alskdgfdh

AND THEN SCAR, HAVING CLEARLY BEEN THROUGH SOME SHIT OF HIS OWN, READY TO TAKE ON SOME MORE SHIT BECAUSE THAT’S HIS SON. HIS CLAIM. GOD. YES. And the fact that she could have so easily just left with Tubbo or snapped his neck or twisted his head off or dropped him from the third story is not lost on me. Im sure that gonna lead to some absolutely god awful nightmares for Scar and Company.

I also desperately want to know what Scar and Tubbo said to each other. Give me the cruuuuuuumbs. But also “There's a dim Fairy light fluttering by Tubbo's foot, and Blondie doesn't notice it for the shadow blocking it from her view.” The COORDINATION IN THIS SCENE. LOOK AT THEM. LOOK AT THEM. THEY ARE MATES AND THAT’S THEIR SON!!!! ABLE TO COMMUNICATE ABSOLUTELY SILENTLY ASKDLFDSH And then the cool, calm, knows his son is okay with his magic that Scar presents as both Mumbo and Grian RUSH forward when Tubbo activates the fairy lights – THIS SCENE IS SO COOL! I HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS ABOUT IT! The visual alone is mesmerizing, but the way it plays into all the magic strengths available to them [obviously not grian bc. No magic yet.] dkflsg AND EVEN THE PENDANT!!! THE PROTECTIVE PENDANT SCAR GAVE HIM! AHHHHH

At this point I feel like we’ve asked how Blondie isn’t dead like 5 times in this series and EVERY time I am gobsmacked she got away in the best way oh she is INSANE and I LOVE it. But also the fact that Tubbo just fucking VAULTED over the handrail the whole family is so in tune with each other oh my god. And all of them gathered around, on the defensive now, scar’s wind picking up I am feeling things.

The explanation of how magic breakdown works is fascinating and I love how they even have time for a little banter about how slow Mumbo feeds but SLFKDG THE PARALLELS BETWEEN MUMBO AND OTHER VAMPIRES IS SO COOL And then the whole brief talk of turning and ‘why do you two care about turning??” these men are wet rats wearing a trenchcoat. “Scar pauses- as if he’s just realized something” I feel like this has to be about like, ways to slow Scar’s Core down from killing him or preventing it all together but SADLKFSH SCAR WHAT DID YOU REALIZE. I THOUGHT WE ALREADY TOOK TURNING OFF THE T – WAIT. WAIT. Other creatures other than vampires feed on blood according to mumbo. HEY ATHERIX – DOES THAT INCLUDE THE VEX??? I NEED TO KNOW FOR SCIENCE REASONS.

AND THEN THE ARGUMENT! OH BOY YOU CAN F E E L THE ADRENALINE RUNNING THROUGH BOTH GRIAN AND SCAR BECAUSE IT GETS SO HEATED AND THEY’RE BOTH SO FREAKED OUT AHH I FEEL SO BAD FOR TUBBO FRANKLY HE DESERVED TO GO OFF. AND THEY WAY SCAR’S MAGIC MOVES WITHOUT HIM SEEMING TO NOTICE TO BE AROUND THEM SALDFKGDFSH And the fact that Grian in all his wisdom recognizes that its not anger its FEAR and he needs to APOLOGIZE lafdkga of all the things he did in this fic that’s gotta be the smartest one tbh. THEY’RE ALL SO POSSESSIVE OF EACH OTHER AUGH AND THE LIL SNIPPET YOU POSTED FOR YOUR ASKS GAME HAS ME GOING INSANE NOW FR.

GO OFF KING TUBBO! I AM SNAPPING MY FINGERS! GO GO GO GO! GO OFF TUBBO!!! CLAP FOR THE BOY EVERYONE CLAPS HE DESERVES THIS HOW WAS THE CATHARSIS TUBBO!!! Also I said it earlier but I will say it again THIS PART -

““And Grian!” Grian almost jolts up at the sound of his name, having never heard Tubbo use it, and even Scar looks surprised as Tubbo turns his ire on Grian, anger fear frustration written across his face. “That stunt you pulled! Leaving us behind to face Myrani by yourself!”

“You did what-” Scar starts, but Tubbo barrels on.”

- IF I WAS GRIAN I WOULD WANT TO BE SET ON FIRE. And you know what Tubbo also deserves to just yell into the night sky. Good for him. Good for you king. Get it out. Someone put Tubbo in a rage room and let him go insane he just got Capri Sun’d and his dads are all being incredibly dumb.

Love also that they only just remembered about Blondie BEING IN THE DAMN MANOR while they’re having this conversation, INCREDIBLY smart on her part to be like “Oh huh uh the wind. Went away. They’re yelling at each other. Deuces.” Also I did NOT miss the fact that while tubbo is STILL going [good for HIM make them SIT DOWN and stop BEING STUPID] Mumbo was also like “Huh you know nows a great time to slide out of here and go. Look. For Blondie yep-“ BUT ALSO TUBBO USING THE PENDANT SCAR GAVE HIM AGAINST SCAR!!! CLAPPING!!!!!

GOD I AM SO READY FOR THEM TO TALK also for those playing along at home, on word we are at 7 PAGES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And 2449 words.

I am once again answering at almost 3 AM because I have no regard for a proper and healthy sleep schedule <3

I want everyone to know I am the worst and most cryptic friend you can ever have exactly because of stuff like this LMAO-

Haha yesss <3 A big reason I included Midnights Past (other than being super self-indulgent) was a breather episode cause shit has gotten REAL here <3 haha Scar and Mumbo definitely do spend time together alone (mainly when Grian's asleep hkfskjd) but you're right, he definitely wouldn't have been at the staff carving without Grian hjfdskj. I wonder who would be invited to see Tubbo carve his first staff... :) On a completely random aside you have no idea how much I'm looking forward to Grian and Mumbo being added to the wall too. (In b4 "vampires don't have reflections/show up in photos" that is only true if the mirror has a silver backing and photography in the Midnight universe has come far enough to no longer include silver <3) A small moment of peace, reminding Grian what he has to lose <3

HAHA YEAH IMAGINE IF HE HAD FOUND IT WHEN THEY VISITED AQUA TOWN HA HA HA <3 But at this point Grian and Scar have history and they love each other so much so he chooses to trust Scar and think of alternative reasons why Scar might have this thing <3 Because this could have gone very badly if it had happened at any other time lmaooo <3 Hm hm hmmmm we'll see what gets said in the next chapter. But you're definitely right, the next chapter is gonna be a huge Grian chapter bc between the three of them, we've seen the least of his history <3 They shall TALK FINALLY and it will be glorious <3 Well he didn't exactly put it back LMAO he was going to but then the whole uh whisper in his ear thing... and he takes it to the manor with him instead... but still, your point stands <3 YEAH LMAO I was giggling when I wrote that line <3

I love Watcher stuff and am itching to get to the meat of it jhfsdjkfdsjk. AH NO I'M SO SORRY ABOUT THE RELIGIOUS TRAUMA but it tracks I think, Grian too has the religious trauma. HA. What if I never confirm or deny what the chosen means. What if I let everyone just assume :) jk jk hjfsdjkfdhj HAHAHA oh yes, there's something there that I cannot WAIT to write about. :) But which I will not expand on here because- well, MAJOR spoilers jhkfdk <3 :) Heheheh yes, that last page.... that will be fun to discuss. I mean it's discussed next chapter but... something about that last page won't be revealed until a certain.. adventure. :) YESSSS I am happy you noticed his thoughts immediately calling back to the passage, as he was actively thinking about it and comparing his situation to it and just hjfdsjkfdskj-

YEAH LMAO I thought to myself "maybe when he catches Tubbo should be the first time he flies since being clipped" which would have been BEAUTIFUL and absolutely heartwarming. Buuuut I also thought "you know, it's totally him to finally fly because he's stubborn and his two braincells are splitting. Hm." hjkfhdskj YEAH he's so SMART and SNEAKY but such a one-track minded bird brain <3 HJFSKJDS LMAO everyone wants to throttle him for this stunt JKFSKLKAS-

Yessssssss makes me want to write a 5 + 1 that shows all the things he's left behind lmao. Cuz something I really loved writing over the course of Midnight is how Scar starts off having never stayed at the manor, instead being a frequent guest at the Inn, and then he stays at the manor when he's too injured to get home, and then he only stays occasionally when either Grian or Mumbo ask/demand he stay, and just starts staying more frequently until he just doesn't go to the Inn anymore (except maybe to say hi to Keralis). He has his own room at the manor now, even if it's unofficially and he doesn't use it anymore because now he's with Grian and Mumbo which means when he stays the night Grian absolutely grabby-hands him for sleepy cuddles, and. I just. I love the evolution of Scar going from having never stayed (willingly) in the manor to pretty much always staying at the manor when he's in Boatem and just hjfdsjkfdsk <3 ANYWAY TANGENT ASIDE but YES Grian leaning into his more possessive side, partly just because he's him and partly because he's trying to push himself... it doesn't work obviously, he has no idea what he's doing when it comes to his magic, BUT! jkfsdjkfdsjk!

Grian, looking at a wall of fire: Yeah I can walk through that UFHSHFKJS he is so. There were so many better ways to get answers. Scar is a history/legends nerd, man, he probably KNOWS. (I say as the author of this story, knowing exactly what Scar does and doesn't know hjkfdsjkfdk) I love Blondie because she's despicable <3 AND YEAH MUMBO with his passive self destruction just. jhkfdslkfdk-

Grian just being like "what a waste" and just jhfdsjkfds their home, their stuff and so much damage, things are ruined and they need to fix it but also there are more important things than fixing broken tile and just hjfdsjkfdkj- He is a reckless and brave bird who doesn't realize he's getting plaid until it's too late because Blondie is a biiiit hard to read, she's such a shit person that he can't tell if the deception and amusement is just her general expression or a sign of something dangerous hjfsdjfdsjk- LOOK I LOVE THE wrong wrong wrong thing, I love the triple repetition of an action or feeling that emphasizes the severity of the action or feeling and just jkfsdjkfkdsj. Idk it just spikes the eerie nervousness, it's so much more tense than just saying "something feels wrong about this situation" and just fhjkdsjkfdskj- YEAH YOU CAUGHT IT he was absolutely trying to pull on his Watcher magic now that he's pretty confident that's what he is. He fails because it's not awakened yet buuuut <3

You act as if Mumbo having blood on his fangs and lips wouldn't drive Grian absolutely wild hkfdJKDJKDSJK but yes, Mumbo is absolutely a much more ethical and neater Vampire than Blondie, who is. Well. She's something else alright. HJfjkdshjfdsjk-

YEAH HE KNOWS BUT HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT ANY OF THIS MEANS HE HAS NO IDEA AND BLONDIE DOESN'T REALLY EITHER BUT SHE HAS MORE OF AN IDEA THAN HE DOES AND IJUST HJDSJHDJKS- Both is good yes LMAO. Grian's gonna have to figure out how to be both at the same time, though <3 AND YEA GRIAN DID IT TO HIMSELF AND WE ALL KNOW HOW BUT HE ISN'T 100% SURE HIMSELF AND JUST JHFSJKDS yes oh man and to think I almost ended this fic without a good and honest talk. They need to figure this out bc oooo man <3 AND YEAH Mumbo has heard those words but has not really realized what it means, in the grander scheme of things. For him he just thinks "Grian can never go back because the Watchers will kill him for what he did" LMAO-

YES. This time Mumbo is there to stop her, he is able to save Grian just in time, and MAN YES MUMBO PRACTICING HIS MAGIC FINALLY IS GONNA BE SUCH A LIFE SAVER HUH. :) Haha I haven't written this certain fic yet (the one that explores Mumbo and Scar's relationship before Grian got involved) but Mumbo is often described by other Vampires as the man who "loses and loses again," besides his general distance he keeps from everyone there is a reason Scar tried so hard to make Mumbo actively dislike him so he'd never hurt him...... :) Which is a feeling that gets properly confronted next chapter by the way <3

Hold onto that thought :)

MUMBO FEELS RESPONSIBLE FOR THEM ALL, they're HIS Coven and he's THEIR Lord he should be able to protect them </3 (which we of course know isn't how it fully works but Mumbo is new to these emotions/instincts of his and just hjfsdjkkfds) Grian deserves a tiny bit of gnawing guilt about this yes-

👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 Hi I need you to DM me asap?

HAHAHAHA you have FINALLY gotten the capri-sun scene JKFHSJKFS dear readers I talked about/described this scene to them ONCE and they have been eagerly waiting for it and I am so happy to finally deliver HJKFHSKJ <3 YESSSS Blondie being able to teleport is so fun because unlike Mumbo's shadow-walking, you don't know where Blondie is going. AND YEAH Blondie even calls him a Coven child jkfdjkfsd if that don't spell it out. (and later on Tubbo even talks about the whole Lord and Coven thing and uses the words we so-) Having no time to process that yes, this child (who is a legal adult but ya know-) is their child now too and AW SHIT fhjjfkgdsjk the moment he gets bitten all logical thought goes out the window and Grian almost faceplants painfully into a few different things hfgdsjkgfdjk but they just want to save him and just. KJDHSJKDS <3

SCAR WILL SQUARE UP FOR HIS SON'S SAKE. He is injured himself, tired and possibly low on magic :) :) but damn, his kid's in trouble and he activated the teleportation glyph in Tubbo's bee glyph SO FAST. Possibly the moment he got a chance- YEAH trust me the nightmares from this are gonna be terrible haha makes a certain future scene :) That you are the only one who knows about :)) a little more :) :) Hm hmm-

hjfgdjkgfdkj it was something very simple, like "Is the pendant charged?" "Not fully, needs magic" jkfsdjkfdjk YEAH Mumbo didn't know what Scar was planning but the moment he saw that Fairy light he knew he needed to hide it from Blondie <3 Once again thank goodness he's been practicing with his magic hjfdsjk BUT YESSSSSS THE COHESIVENESS, THE FLAWLESS WORKING TOGETHER I AM JUST HKFSKJSD YESSS Scar being calm and collected while Mumbo and Grian are like "WAIT A MINUTE WHAT THE HECK THAT'S RAW MAGIC" jkfhsdkjhgk let me tell you, I have ALWAYS imagined this scene going that way- with Tubbo using Scar's Fairy light to activate the protection glyph he has <3 jkfsdfdjk AND YES THE SHOWCASE OF ALL THE MAGIC I love it. One day Grian will join in <3 AND YESSS THE MVP PROTECTION PENDANT HHHAHHDS-

At least now we have a bit of an answer <3 kfdsjkfdkj YEAH Tubbo vaulted over like he was so confident that ONE of them would catch him cuz he jumped from the THIRD FLOOR and just hjfjdskfgds he knew at least Scar wouldn't let him hit the ground <3 So much trust in this family I love them <3 They're a FAMILY your honor-

Yessss from the moment I established how Vampires actually feed (off the inherent magic found in blood) I knew I'd need to talk about this eventually, because establishing that magic cannot actually mix or be absorbed by 99% of the Supernatural population, because of how it conflicts with their own magic... I knew I'd have to explain eventually how Vampires are able to use other people's magic jkfgfdlk And yes. I specified Supernaturals on purpose. Because there is a group of Natural that is very well known for absorbing foreign magic into their own core :) They will ALWAYS find time to banter <3 HFJKSHKFDSJK Mumbo is just <3 My beloved hkjglfdkgdf LMAO WET RATS IN TRENCH COATS pretty much <3 Mumbo is sus immediately and Scar barely even gives the conversation a first thought, nevermind a second- HJFKSHJKFDSK :) I cannot say about that :)

YEAH THE ARGUMENT WAS FUN TO WRITE but it made me nervous just writing it so <3 But I am also anxiety personified so uh- BUT YEAH I agree Tubbo 1000% deserved to go off after this </3 But they're both freaked out and worried and afraid and they just need to talk <3 HA let me tell you magic responding to a person's emotions is one of my weaknesses I am WEAK for it AND YES Grian's little emotion-reading power comes in clutch, Scar is scared because he just found out he was so close to losing Grian and Mumbo and Tubbo and just jkfjkfdl <3 <3 He loves Scar and doesn't want to hurt him in any way and just <3<3 HAHA YESSSSSS <3

I AM CLAPPING FOR HIM. THE CATHARSIS, THE JUST SCREAMING, PROBABLY SOME THINGS HE'S BEEN THINKING FOR A WHILE, SCAR. FHJSKFJLKS that is the epitome of "it was at this moment Grian knew, he fucked up." JUST JKFSKLJS Tubbo, who was raised to not use people's real names (even though he is not Fae and would only be able to compel a Fae with their name, and not a non-Fae kjfsdkj), using Grian's real name. That's like- calling someone's first, middle and last name in the house HJKFDHJLKFS Tubbo needs a rage room. He needs time to just vent and rant because he's gotten custody of the shared Coven braincell this chapter jkfdslofdskj

LMAO YEAH she just peaced out. To be fair to her, though (which I hate doing, really)- she's injured and weak and in a very primal state, and they're yelling and Scar's magic is flaring and who knows what Grian's might have been doing at that moment and just hjfdshgjkdhjkfgds she chooses to fight another day when it's less likely Scar's magic will explode and Grian's magic will violently awaken LMAO- hfkjdshgjklds I thought it was funny when I wrote it, too- Tubbo going off on his dad while Scar apologizes, because an apology isn't gonna magically fix everything, and Mumbo just. Listening. While he tries to get the door locked again and searches the manor with his shadows. Just. Hjkfsdklfds And yes the pendant. Tubbo knows a little about the pendant's history and the way it made Scar feel, it's his way of saying tell them. Let them in. Let yourself trust them with the most fragile parts of you, because that's what you do with people you love. And the pendant- the symbol of Scar's father's love for him, his desire to protect him, which became the symbol of Scar's love and desire to protect his son, something inherently so powerful yet gentle and fragile, something that needs to be taken care of and tended to but which can save your life with such a grand display of power....... do you see the metaphor here-

I AM ALSO READY FOR THEM TO TALK I HAVE BEEN WAITING TO WRITE SOME OF THIS CONVERSATION I AM. SO EXCITED. I've already got ~2600 words written and we're not even halfway through the first third of the conversation HJKFHSJKS-

Guess what it's past 4 AM now. It took me an hour to respond. ~2500 words HAHA WORTH IT-

#Ask #Midnight Series #Hermitshipping #Mumscarian #Long post

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