#and then the way aziraphales phrasing communicates crowleys usefulness

[actual-changeling]

No Nightingales

or: the one time they are actually on the same page

Welcome back to Alex's unhinged meta corner—we once again find ourselves in the final fifteen because I am far from done with them.

I already dove deep into the potential meaning of that phrase, you can find the meta post here, but regardless of what it stands for, the important part of today's post is their mutual recognition of it.

During their entire argument, they are on two different levels of understanding, and while Crowley is somewhat aware of that, Aziraphale very much isn't. But then, right at the end, Crowley invokes the nightingales, and suddenly they find themselves on the same plane of communication.

Let's start from the beginning. Well, not the beginning beginning, but rather the beginning of the end of their conversation.

Aziraphale is visibly upset, there's a strong undercurrent of genuine anger within the hurt, and he reverts back to an almost petulant expression when he tells Crowley "there's nothing more to say".

The movement he is doing with his mouth—maybe biting his cheeks from the looks of it—is the same one as at the end of their very first argument of the season. In the back of the bookshop with Jimbriel being the centre of their discussion, he eventually tells Crowley "but if you won't, you won't". When he sits down and throws his little temper tantrum, it's the same expression of 'I am kicking you out, go leave'.

In episode 1, Crowley does indeed leave, although we all know he comes back later that evening, but not this time. He knows Aziraphale, he knows exactly why he is doing what he is doing, why he is saying what he is saying, and while it broke his heart, it also means he is out of patience and energy.

For six thousand years, he has been trying to get Aziraphale to understand—and he simply refused to do the work necessary for that, preferring to stay in his cognitive dissonance framework of the world.

They are as done as they can be in that moment, and yet Crowley stays and tries one more thing: No nightingales.

"Listen, do you hear that?" is not a question Aziraphale expected, which is quite obvious in his annoyed reaction.

(side note: If someone I love were to talk to me the way Aziraphale responds to Crowley here I'd slap them and walk out. The absolute disrespect in his tone is appalling and Crowley deserves a reward for putting up with it.)

"I don't hear anything," and he isn't getting it just yet, still angry and petulant, still upset.

But then that changes. "That's the point. No nightingales," and Crowley is looking at him like it means something, begging him to listen, to understand—and Aziraphale DOES.

Look at the change in his expression, all that angry annoyance is gone and replaced by a sad dawning of understanding. If you compare this expression with his earlier one, the shift is as obvious as a blinking neon sign on a dark road.

Whatever the exact meaning of 'no nightingales' is, it is unambiguous and a fundamental part of how they communicate about their relationship with each other. Aziraphale has his oh moment, he is forced to confront the entire argument they just had and what it lead them to, what it destroyed.

That is what Crowley tells him, what hits Aziraphale hard enough to completely push him off-balance, to make him sad and visibly hurt instead of angry and upset. Michael 'microexpressions' Sheen strikes again.

Focus on the look in his eyes, the small, almost imperceptible shift, the shame that appears, and the tears it brings. He averts his gaze at first and then raises it back to Crowley because he understands now, he finally realised what Crowley has been trying to tell him the entire time.

No nightingales. It means we're done, we're over. It means I cannot come with you, I have to leave and safe myself. It means I love you, I know you love me, but it isn't enough.

It means we could have been us—but not anymore. Crowley sees him understand, and THAT is why he calls him an idiot; it's not about him returning to heaven or any of the other shit he said. It is about Aziraphale not listening to Crowley, of being so caught up in his bullshit he did not understand the simple message he was being told.

"You idiot. We could have been us."

I love you I love you I love you but now we are ruined and I blame you. If you had listened we could have been happy together, but look at where we ended up instead.

Aziraphale is still staring at him, but once those words leave Crowley's mouth, the tears begin to rise. Lips pressed together to keep himself from crying, the little wobble disturbing them, the pure, distilled pain etching itself into his face.

Shame. Guilt. Anger. Blaming Crowley, blaming himself. Aziraphale is confused, forced to make decisions without getting the space to breathe, to think, and he fell back into the easiest option—be a good angel and do what heaven says.

A part of him KNOWS all of that. It knows what he just did, what he ruined, how much they ended up hurting each other. So the tears come, and when he can no longer keep himself from crying, he turns away.

Crowley understandably combusts at that because really? Really? You dare to turn away from me after all this? I ripped myself open in front of you, and when I FINALLY manage to make you understand you turn your back on me?

He is desperate and hurt, heartbroken beyond repair, and there are six millennia of hopeless love spilling over—so he kisses him.

Hear me, listen to me, understand, I love you I love you I love you, I am losing you, I don't want to lose you, we're done. I know this won't change anything. I know what you will tell me, but I need to try. I need to make sure you know how much I love you.

I need you to understand what you are leaving behind.

There is no secret conversation happening, there's no trick, otherwise this moment of realisation would not exist.

But it does. It is right there for everyone to see.

After everything, this was probably the most painful moment for me, because you see him get it. You see him process, you see him understand, you can practically taste the chaos unfolding in his mind.

Aziraphale understands, but it is too late, and so he finishes what he started and leaves anyway.

#alex talks good omens #good omens #ineffable husbands #crowley #aziraphale #good omens season 2 #go2 #aziracrow #crowley x aziraphale #ineffable divorce #the final fifteen #good omens meta #no nightingales

[biceratops7]

… let’s talk about “Arrival”

So I was fully intending on making a more general but thorough peruse through the new Good Omens title sequence, because my FUCK aren’t those always a gold mine. But then I thought to myself, “hey wait a minute, I can be even more unhinged and on brand.”

Something I’ve seen nobody talk about yet is that the movie that the procession is marching into is The Arrival, which is a 90’s movie that draws a pretty straightforward parallel. But I think if it doubles as a reference to 2016’s Arrival, THAT has some much more interesting implications. Either way this reference is doing some heavy lifting.

For those who haven’t seen the movie (or that one philosophy tube video about it lol), the basic plot is that a group of aliens later named heptopods arrive on earth scattered across the world, and just kind of invite humanity to check them out. Each country hires a team of linguists who are all tasked with figuring out what the visitors are here for. But the thing is, it’s only about aliens on the surface level. This is really about communicating, cooperation, and how language holds the power to alter your very fabric of reality.

Spoilers for the movie:

Two major revelations occur towards the end of the movie. The first is that an element of fluid time is revealed. Throughout the movie, the main American linguist has been having flashbacks to a daughter that passed away of an illness. But since the heptopod language has no regard for chronological order, we learn that these are actually flash-forwards when she becomes nearly fluent. In other words, learning heptopod, having a genuine curiosity and even compassion for these vastly different beings. has given her the ability to perceive reality in ways thought previously impossible.

Even before noticing the Arrival reference, I’ve been side eyeing these “flashbacks”, but this and the image above confirmed it for me. Any instance of the word “becoming” when talking about the past indicates some sort of fluid time nonsense. The past is fixed unless something ✨happens✨. I don’t think these are simply memories, I think something rather cosmic instead is afoot.

But it’s more than just “there’s probably time travel in this” though. Simply having Aziraphale as a companion has changed Crowley. It’s given him an ability that he’s not meant to be capable of as a demon. He already had it in him to be good and have mutual relationships based in trust and kindness, I’m sure all demons can if given the right nurture… but Crowley is experiencing love. In the show, something tangible to the senses and distinctly angelic. I’m very much hoping that that whole element of things is going to somehow be a driving factor in what’s occurring over all, and possibly involved in time going screwy.

The other element of Arrival’s ending that’s of import, is the heavy emphasis on the importance of cooperation. First of all, we learn at some point that not every country has the same message to decipher, they each have one piece of a whole. Some of the countries begin using games to communicate with their heptopods, and this poses a problem because it causes messages to be more easily interpreted as hostile. For example, the phrase “we brought a tool” can be easily misconstrued as “we have a weapon.” Eventually, the world gets impatient and scared, and a war is imminent. What finally leads to everyone putting down arms and cooperating, is the American linguist sending a message to the Chinese linguist saying “in war, there are no victors, only widows.”

Something noteworthy about this particular march is that the procession never splits like it does at the end of the first season’s. Not only are both angelic and demonic figures marching into the light atop a mountain as a United front, but this actually seems to be a theme this season. Heaven and Hell aren’t working together as far as we know, but they are at least working towards the same goal, which for some reason is getting Gabriel’s ass. There is also a heavy emphasis on mending broken relationships, with Crowley and Azirphale trying to fix a (probably) lesbian couple literally being the B plot.

Now this is where we bring in what’s actually on the movie screen, which is that damn box. So at this point we know basically nothing about it accept for it probably being a Mcguffin. But we DO have the imagery of three feathers, a black one, a white one, and a bluish grey one, falling into it… and it sure as fuck looks like a moving box. So back to arrival, what actually was the message? The heptopods told the linguist that they’re here to help humanity (via giving them a tool or new tech I think?) because in 3,000 years, they will need humanity’s help. So with this and the world eventually being inspired to stand down and share their pieces of the message, it’s this over arching theme of setting aside fear of the other and cooperating indefinitely for the benefit of the whole. The black feather, the white feather… and then something that is somehow both yet entirely unique.

I think… somehow, someway, this season may culminate in Heaven and Hell reconciling. Whether it be against a common enemy, for a shared goal, or in love, there seems to be many clues both symbolic and literal that show them learning to be one again. Learning to understand eachother’s language and see new ways of being neither before could fathom.

#by the way the last image (not the meme) are Aziraphale and Crowley circling eachother in a dance like pattern… like twin stars… #so close they may from a great distance appear as one… #good omens #season 2 #speculation #meta #analysis #ineffable husbands #Aziraphale #Crowley #arrival 2016 #season 2 title sequence #biceratops

[santacoppelia]

There is something about Shax! (A loving meta)

I have written it too fast and in Spanish, but I really love what happened with demons and Hell in general this season: while in S1 they were kind of "set dressing" and the only distinctive demons were the higher ups, s2 brought us Shax and Furfur, and gave us more insight into Hell, gave Eric a lot of opportunities to charm us, and we saw a lot of small-scale demons that were all different in their own ways.

From all of these things, most of my notes point to Shax. The character is amazing, partly because Miranda Richardson is a great actress, but also because she has some characteristics that made her pop (I'll use female pronouns because the character is so high femme). I talked about some of them in the meta about angels, but Shax definitely deserves their own post! As I've already covered her particular mix of ingenuity, lets get into their abilities and style!!

When talking about her style I'd divide it into looks and communication. All of her looks are SPECTACULAR. So proper, so high femme, so classy, so glam... She is into projecting a carefully curated image. I respect that in a demon, really. Even when in Hell, her form is only changed by the teeth: lots of them, and quite ferocious. I feel that the mix represents her in full: a prim and proper exterior with a wild interior.

The wild interior can be inferred from her communication style. Shax usually exaggerates Hell menace and power, as we can see with some of her phrases:

"disliked by Heaven, hunted and eliminated by Hell";

"Beelzebub is not happy with you",

"All the forces of Hell will declare war to your friend"

"legions of demons to storm the bookshop, killing everyone",

“we’ll make it in ferocity and dangerosity”,

"we’ll chase you" to Beelzebub…

She has even “formulated a plan”, a very violent, enormous, ridiculous overplayed plan, but she is so excited to see it into fruition. Most of these are empty threats (Beelzebub is never really angry at Crowley, and they downplay the menace of being chased with the fact that they are understaffed...) but it says a lot of things about how Shax sees herself and the role of Hell in all of this.

Shax has an interesting power: she seems to voice the negative talk anyone has to mock them. This was very evident with Maggie:

Don’t embarrass yourself in front of the woman you pathetically love.

You are nothing, you run a shop that nobody visits.

You are nobody.

Unable to pay the rent.

Dull.

Unloved and unlovable.

You’ll live and die a nobody.

Those are scary! I have a little theory about how each character has different powers (it is a longer text and I'm just writing this because I already had it almost done), and this Shax's power is fantastic. Have we noticed what she says to Aziraphale?

You are not Crowley's type (he confidently dismisses this on their first encounter, with just a raised eyebrow)

You are an outlaw, you have no protection

Crowley’s emotional support angel

The softest touch

The one who went native

you need more huge meals?

Should we send up the sous-chef (not sushi)?

There is a really insightful demonic ability at play in there.

I also found really funny how, without Crowley giving her advice about how to appear, she just appears THREE TIMES in front of Aziraphale and still make the “I’m just a stranded motorist hitchhiking”. She hasn’t still get how Earth works, and that makes her fun AND terrifying.

How will all of this play into S3? Especially now that she will probably be a Grand Duke of Hell (or just a Duke). I'm already enjoying it and it hasn't been written yet! *covers her eyes*

#shax #shax good omens #good omens #good omens 2 #good omens meta #questions about hell

[dee-morris]

I Think We Moved on Too Quickly from Coffee Theory

Yeah yeah I know. But hear me out.

When I watched the season two finale the first time, I felt blindsided by it. From a narrative perspective it made sense, bc Neil Gaiman said that he needed to set up the situation that would make season three possible and okay yeah, that probably meant putting Crowley and Aziraphale in weird and different places. I got that. But from a character perspective it felt like a huge reversal from Aziraphale's behavior throughout season two, and of course that led me to look for outside factors that could have caused it.

After talking about it with Internet friends, reading lots of metas, thinking and discussing and watching the season over again, I decided that it wasn't necessary to believe that Aziraphale had been drugged. Most of what he said and did could be explained by careful study and analysis. Once you realize that Metabitch's presence in the bookshop is a veiled threat, everything else falls into place.

Nevertheless.

I definitely DO NOT Believe that Aziraphale was brainwashed or mind controlled by the coffee. His behavior during the Final Fifteen was frenetic, desperate, little bit manic. Definitely not the behavior of a mindless zombie. But nevertheless.

I still think that there was too much emphasis on the coffee for it to be a simple prop. Is it a literal macguffin or a symbolic one, that I'm not sure. I could see it either way. It might be just a symbol of the Sophie's Choice that Aziraphale had been presented with, or... There might have actually been something in the coffee.

The show makes a point of telling us that celestials can be affected by human poison. Almonds are symbolic in the Bible, and cyanide smells like almonds. Again, Aziraphale's behavior at the breakup scene was not that of a brainwashed person, but what if the Metatron TRIED something like that and it didn't completely work?

Aziraphale didn't want to follow the Metatron until after he drank the coffee. And even then he turned and looked at Crowley, and he didn't move until Crowley told him to go ahead. (Cue the Breaking Bad Walter Screaming in the Car meme) What if whatever the Metatron tried on Aziraphale only kind of worked? Just enough to make Aziraphale a bit dizzy and suggestible, but being close to Crowley mitigated the worst of it. That's why Metatrash needed to separate them.

Aziraphale is very clever, and if he knew he'd been drugged he would also know better than to let on that it hadn't worked completely. Cue the weird off-key phrases that are ALMOST in character but still pretty damn weird. "Heaven is the side of goodness, of light" my dude has NEVER said anything like that. He's said that about God, yes, but he's always held a distinction between God and heaven. Or "you're the bad guys" that's just WEIRD, that's a weird thing for him to say, and I will die on this hill. Even during their worst fights Aziraphale has made distinctions been himself and Crowley in terms of their job descriptions, but he's never made a moral judgement like that before, nor has he ever lumped Crowley in with the rest of hell. "They're the bad guys," now that would have made sense, and if it were anyone but Neil Gaiman running this shit I would think that it was a simple scripting error. But Neil doesn't make mistakes like that.

So Aziraphale plays along and tried desperately to communicate with Crowley that something IS VERY WRONG but our favorite disaster demon picks NOW to get in his feelings and ignore the clear and present danger standing outside the bookshop and staring at them. I'm pretty sure "I forgive you" is Aziraphalese for ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??

Again, I don't need my version of Coffee Theory to be real to understand what happened in the Final Fifteen, but it's just an interesting little toy to roll around in my head. There's so much emphasis on that coffee in the show and even in the episode synopsis, I still think there's something about it that we haven't been told.

#good omens #aziraphale #crowley #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #good omens 2 #aziraphale my beloved #good omens season 2 #good omens meta #good omens s2 #coffee theory #the final fifteen

[chlorine-and-daisies]

fics i enjoyed last week!

Confiteor (M) by @adverbian- When the title comes from a prayer for confessing sins, and the tags say it's a marriage proposal, you know this one is going to hit. It's made up of Aziraphale's thoughts and a conversation with Crowley after all of the fighting is done- a forgiving, poetic, and grown-up kind of epilogue. As a 3k word oneshot, every phrase is intentional, and it definitely has that crafted emotional impact. I liked that we don't actually see Armageddon Part 2, but are able to piece together what happened from their dialogue. It's rated M for some *very lightly* implied masturbation at the start and sex at the end (just a few lines), but imo the real reason is because it's a mature take on the characters and their inner motivations. If the Final Fifteen is still hurting you, and you wish Aziraphale and Crowley would just sit down and talk, read this.

Terminus (T) by BraveLight (@emotional-support-demon-crowley)- This is a really unique AU where Aziraphale is an astronaut on a decades-long mission and Crowley is the mission controller responsible for bringing him home! But things get complicated quickly when a. they are absolutely whipped for each other and b. the company that started the mission may not actually want it to succeed! I love the characterization of Aziraphale, Crowley, and the Them in this one. They mainly communicate through calls, and the dialogue is always funny and sweet. I've gotten invested in the story and the mystery in it. It's currently on chapter 7/16, and I'm looking forward to see where it'll take us next!

You, you're driving me crazy (T) - author anonymous- Aziraphale prepares for his driving test in the 1930s, and tries to remember his lessons in the 40s! This one is clearly written with so much love. The narration and dialogue was perfectly in character, the historical setting is full of fun details, and the side characters were unique without feeling forced in. Aziraphale channeling his inner book detective to save Crowley was so entertaining!

requiem of a fallen angel (T) by viperinz- Aziraphale Falls, and Crowley holds him through it. This one is adorable, painful, and powerful hurt-comfort that made me laugh and cry. Yes, it was on my previous list too, and I'm recommending it again this week because the author just finished the sixth and final chapter, and the ending was soft and a satisfying wrap-up, plot-wise, symbolically, and emotionally!!

And for this week's deep cut: city continues on, alone (G) by burnttongueontea (@aziraphale-rights) from 2020! This is a oneshot that takes place in an AU where Adam turned Aziraphale and Crowley human, and they've settled down in the South Downs cottage. In it, Aziraphale returns to London after selling the bookshop. I know, I know- becoming human? Selling a single book, let alone the shop? Those are fighting words!!! But I would really encourage you to keep an open mind and give this a read. The descriptions of London are so vivid and Aziraphale's characterization is great, full of nostalgia and experience and love. It's sad, but there's humor in it too. The author really explores the idea of longing for a place and time in a way that not too many do. We're writing about immortals in this fandom and yet we often forget the weariness that comes along with watching everything go by. Not only that, but the author uses the human AU to tell a very human story about missing a place that no longer exists and watching it change as you start to age. It came as no surprise when I looked in the comments after reading and saw them talking about how they wrote it at a time when they were personally homesick for London! This is the purpose of all good writing- to write about the human experience, to connect to your characters, to tell a story only you could tell.

So yeah! This was a really great week of reading for me. I originally intended to share these lists every weekend- this is only my second post, and I'm already falling behind (it was finals week)! But don't worry, I'm still here to highlight recent work and share my opinions in long rants. I tried to tag all the authors whose Tumblrs I could find, but as always please let me know if I've missed one.

Please add your own recommendations (including self-promotion), and I hope you will enjoy these stories as much as I did!

#good omens #aziracrow #ineffable husbands #fanfiction #fanfic rec #fic rec #fanfiction recommendation #chlorine and recommendations

[certifiablyinsanez]

In the Job minisode, the conversation at the end between Aziraphale and Crowley has so much more depth than people are giving it credit for. Let’s take it from the top.

Aziraphale is sitting by the edge of the ocean. We can only imagine how long he’s been sitting there and what he’s feeling. Because from everything we can tell that Aziraphale feels extremely deeply. His expressions betray that. Imagine how he must’ve been feeling in that moment, that any minute he’s going to Fall. They don’t know what it’s like. Crowley does but he would never dare ask. He’s probably imagining all kinds of horrors that will happen to him, not just in the Fall but what would come after. He doesn’t have it in him to be an agent of Hell. He can’t possible assume that he could be like Crowley, just “evil” enough to avoid suspicion because he’s not like Crowley. He didn’t fall with the others. He would be a target. Imagine if you were the new kid at an eternal school of manipulators, cruel people, and even killers? He is trying to force himself to the conclusion that this is his fate, grappling that any second it’ll happen. You’ve ever anticipated something horrible about to happen? That feeling is unbearable.

So when Crowley saunters over, probably to check on Aziraphale, Azi thinks that it’s time. What breaks my heart is that beneath all the anguish, there’s a hint of relief to see that it’s Crowley who has come to take him and not some hellish monster. When he says it’s time to be taken to Hell, he is being extremely brave because Aziraphale is perhaps braver than anyone else in the series. The way he breaks down that he is now “a demon”, “a fallen Angel”, we can’t help but chuckle along with Crowley because many of us are like Crowley. We see how silly that is. That someone who does something like thwart a bet to save the lives of children and lying to your (asshole) coworkers about it is definitely something that would not constitute damnation. But is it as ridiculous as it sounds? After all, Crowley was just a sweet little star maker who loved her art and had a pension for questions. Aziraphale has been around the angels for a long time. Every interaction with them is pins and needles, constantly trying to dance around the subjects and the (drum roll) questions. It’s agonizing to watch because what is clearly toxic and abusive to us (and Crowley) is just “the way things are” for Azi. These pricks would absolutely cast Aziraphale out for this. I think Crowley remembers this because he quickly stops joking about his curly white hair and robes.

This part is a mirror to episode 6. Aziraphale is offering to go to Hell. Crowley could’ve been selfish. He could’ve been demon-y and accepted. He could’ve seen this as an opportunity to be closer to Azi, to bring him closer to his fold. Surely they could more easily be together on the same side right? It certainly removes a lot of the danger associated with their relationship. Not once does any of that cross Crowley’s mind. He is very firm in denying Aziraphale the passage. He says that he “wouldn’t like it”, but in that phrase was also, “you don’t deserve it”. Crowley would never have brought him to Hell.

Which is why it’s so much more painful when Aziraphale offers him something else. Not only does Crowley refuse *again (something that is not normal in their relationship since it’s usually Azi doing the refusing), this time it’s Crowley who won’t go with Aziraphale. It hurts because Crowley considered Aziraphale in 2,500 BC. Knew he “wouldn’t like it”, but that it was not a place that he belonged, and somewhere he would never in a million years take him because Crowley knows it is a compromise of Azi’s entire identity and soul. And because they don’t communicate and say what they actually mean, it appears to Crowley that Aziraphale has not given him the same courtesy and consideration when he is offered to become an angel again. That, coupled with the whole “of course you said no to Hell *YOU’RE the bad guys” and the misunderstood “nothing lasts forever”, Crowley is left with the conclusion that he just doesn’t mean as much to Aziraphale as he had hoped.

#aziracrow #aziraphale #crowley #good omens #im not ok rn #job minisode #bildaddy #ineffable partners #ineffable idiots

[emwallas176]

S2 E1 and E6 Parallels

[Disclaimer: Season Two Spoilers!!]

One thing that I noticed recently (and I haven't seen anyone mention it yet) is how similar the arguments are between Crowley and Aziraphale in S2 E1 and E6.

For context, these scenes are (E1) when Crowley and Aziraphale are bickering over what to do with Gabriel's sudden arrival. Crowley wants to dump him somewhere but Aziraphale wants to help him. For (E6), this is the ineffable divorce scene, you know the one.

Firstly, both scenes start off with Crowley as the instigator. In both instances, he's shown as very agitated, stumbling over words, looking about, and looking all together a bit of an anxious mess. This is a side of him we don't normally see. What this is showing us is a pattern of behavior. Crowley seems to be most anxious when he and the things he cares about are threatened, more specifically, threatened by Heaven (ie. this boy has some serious religious trauma). Secondly, I feel like these two scenes also show a change in Crowley since the first season. In Season One, his solution for things was always to run away. He asked Aziraphale in two different instances to run away with him. In this season, however, and with these two scenes, we see that Crowley's go-to solution has changed. Instead of running away, he's standing his ground, he's saying, 'no, we saved the world, it's our world, Heaven and Hell are the ones who should leave'. This, I think, is important because it shows how detached from the two sides Crowley has become. He's not just apart from them now, he's literally on his own side (Earth's side) and he's not willing to give that up, not after he's so painstakingly carved out this 'precious, peaceful, fragile existence' for him, FOR THEM ("I thought we carved it out for ourselves" "So did I!").

Another huge point that I feel connects these two scenes is the 'exactly' bit from the first episode. Crowley literally says "I feel like your exactly and my exactly are different exactly's"!! Which is the whole freaking point of the last scene in (E6). They are both saying the same thing which is essentially "I want us to be together" but they're still different enough in the ways that matter that they don't end up seeing eye to eye. Because what Aziraphale is saying is "Come with me" but Crowley is saying "Stay with me". They both want to be together and they both know that's what the other wants too, but neither are willing to compromise on how to do it so it leads to heartbreak. Also ALSO the line "nothing lasts forever" is a direct parallel to the 'exactly' bit. Hold on, let me explain. Because when Aziraphale says this, he's talking about the bookshop, he's talking about an environment, the vessel through which they spend time together, he's saying that the way they exist together can change (ie. they can exist together in Heaven). But the way Crowley hears it is "nothing lasts forever, even us". The phrase is interpreted differently between the two of them. It's them miscommunicating AGAIN because while they're agreeing ("exactly" "yes, exactly") they also have no idea what the other is really trying to say. It's awful and lovely and rips my heart out (I don't normally like the miscommunication trope but this is too good).

And then, in (E1), Aziraphale tells Crowley if he doesn't want to help him with Gabriel then he can leave. And Crowley asks if that's what he really wants, and Aziraphale immediately crumbles. Immediately, he admits "No, I would love you to help me!" I love how they both are communicating and yet not at the same time. Usually, in the miscommunication trope, this is where the person would lie and say something like 'yes, go ahead and leave, I don't need you'. But Aziraphale doesn't like. He admits he wants Crowley to help, to work on this together, to be a team. And it's lovely because it shows that the two are willing to communicate, they are putting in the effort, they just aren't connecting the way they want to because there's so much else going on, clouding their judgment. And they do the same song and dance in the last episode. They communicate what they want. They ask for what they want. But the problem with communication is that you can't just talk. You have to listen too. You have to try and understand the other side and where they're coming from. And I think the two of them have been on the defense for so long (ie. hiding their relationship, fighting Heaven and Hell, stopping the end of the literal freaking world) that they've forgotten how to let their guards down and actually make a good, honest effort to be understood.

After their bickering in (E1), Crowley storms out. He does the same at the end of (E6) too. The only difference between the two is that in (E1) he comes back and does the apology dance. He doesn't come back for Aziraphale at the end of (E6) though. He waits for him, but he doesn't chase, he doesn't apologize. He knows that he's not the one who has to do the apology dance this time, but he's willing to wait for it. And it's only when Aziraphale gets in the lift, it's only when he leaves first, that Crowley finally gets in his car and drives away. Because they've had fights before, but it's always been okay in the end because at least they're on the same page. Now, though, now they're starting to realize that they just might be reading from different books.

#good omens #good omens 2 #rambles by me #long rambles #crowley #aziraphale #ineffable divorce #good omens episode 1 #good omens episode 6 #parallels #scene analysis #am I off my rocker for this?? #am I just shouting into the void? #can anybody hear me? #lol #anywayyy

[critrolecannibal]

Had a lovely conversation about one of my previous posts and they suggested I share more of my thoughts on specifically Aziraphale! I've just kinda pulled from that conversation.

Enjoy

~This is exactly it for Aziraphale I think! He's in a very toxic relationship with Heaven, one that Crowley managed to get out of, but Aziraphale has it so intertwined with who he is as an individual.

If he's not an Angel/Good/Useful to God, then what is he?

And unlike Crowley, who had to find out those answers for himself, Aziraphale has sort of forced himself to stay sheltered out of this fear of change. He still desires to make his Creator proud of him.

At the end during their fight, Crowley isn't entirely in the right either. As much as we all are frustrated with Aziraphale right now- Nina and Maggie were right, they don't talk. Azi and Crowley haven't been good at communicating for the last 6,000 years so they weren't going to be good at it just because Crowley decided to actually say what he was feeling.

Aziraphale has never been able to make quick decisions, he's anxious about things and he panics about how they will affect him and others and how that could in turn affect his relationship with God. So when Azi has quite literally just been stuck between Heaven and Hell AGAIN, manipulated into accepting the job in Heaven, and THEN had the info drop of Crowley trying to run away together again. It's too much for him. He reverts back to what he thinks is "right".

What's more right than Heaven?

This isn't the first time Crowley has asked him to run away together and Aziraphale has panicked, pushed Crowley back to a "your side vs my side" deal. It's not even the first time he's used the phrase "I forgive you" as almost an judgement and an apology at the same time. We see him start this in S1 the first time Crowley asks him to leave, Azi says "May you be forgiven" for his lack of faith in the Great Plan.

Crowley then goes on a little tiff about how he's unforgivable, after that Aziraphale only ever says "I forgive you". He says it the next time Crowley asks him to run to Alpha Centuri outside the book shop. He uses it when he thinks Crowley isn't showing faith, not just in God or whatever, but a lack of faith in Aziraphale.

I think that during their last fight Aziraphale doesn't think Crowley has any faith in him. Doesn't think he'll be able to make a difference, even though in Aziraphale's mind he's doing this FOR CROWLEY just as much as he's doing it for the comfort of being part of the institution and the relationship with God he's wanted for so long. It's a win win for him and he's taken aback when it turns out for the worse.

The kiss wasn't romantic at all- it was angry. This was Crowley trying to force Aziraphale to make a decision, putting all his cards on the table with a big "Choose me" neon sign. Unfortunately Aziraphale misunderstood the neon sign reading more along the lines of "You can't make a difference, so stay because you're nothing without me". And it not only takes Azi off guard but is also insulting. Which is why even though he panics, and wants to run back to Crowley, he doesn't. He's angry just as much as Crowley is. And the manipulation from The Metatron/Heaven just has an open window to be comforting, and be the "good guy".

Neil is a genius for how well focused he's been able to use the miscommunication trope. Since episode one we see that it's going to be drawn attention to because of the whole "Exactly" scene, where their two "exactly's" mean something different.

Crowley and Aziraphale love each other, but they don't know how to show that love in a way the other one wants to receive.

Aziraphale wants to make Crowley happy like he was as an Angel. He wants Crowley to be able to smile again as he did when he created the stars. Aziraphale is willing to change Heaven to make IT worthy of Crowley. (Crowley sees it as Azi trying to change him to make him worthy of Heaven)

Crowley doesn't need all of that. He doesn't need Heaven, doesn't need Hell, he just wants Aziraphale the way he is and the way that they've always been together in the moments that neither have them have needed Heaven or Hell. They've been on Earth for so long that Crowley doesn't consider them part of anything other than themselves. Wherever Aziraphale is, is his Heaven. All he wants is to be is that same thing to Aziraphale.

But they never talk about what they need from each other, they're only thinking about what they can do for the other and unfortunately the two just don't match.

That was a long one, but I've got so many thoughts and feelings on this. It's been a while since a show can make me feel such big emotions. So thank you to everyone who was a part of it and a big thanks to Neil Gaiman who is keeping it alive. 🥰

#good omens #good omens s2 #aziracrow #aziraphale #crowley #good omens spoilers #gos2spoilers #aziraphale and crowley #crowley and aziraphale #azirowley #ineffable husbands #ineffable fandom #ineffable partners #good omens season 2 #im still traumatized #neil gaiman #neil gaiman is amazing #season 2 killed me but in a good way #this is an Aziraphale safe space #leave Aziraphale alone #no Aziraphale hate

[kits-ships]

10, 11, and 20 for the end of year askgame?

yay thank you!!! i feel like i never get to respond to your asks (lost the ask game/i missed f/ovember/i forget i can answer them privately jhjkgdfg) so now i can redeem myself B)

have you bought any merch of your F/O or other items that remind you of them this year?

YES SO MUCH.... highlights include both of four's scarves, the aziraphale and crowley keychains i got at comiccon, lots of stickers that i wrapped for myself as a holiday gift, and i think my tardis backpack!!! all very fun and useful <3

has an F/O inspired you to pick up a new hobby/interest/habit this year?

not exactly, but ive certainly been doing a lot of weird research because of them!

with campbell and 🥂💊 i read a lot about schiz/ophrenia

with alec ive learned chunks of british law and about gsw's gfdgh....

then, overall, im learning a lot about babies and stuff for my fankids, so thats also fun! gross, but fun! there are also certain phrases from random f/os that echo in my head, particularly with ❄️🪓

are there any hopes and wishes you have regarding your own selfships and/or the selfship community as a whole for the coming year?

in the kindest way possible, i think a good chunk of this community needs to look into dbt/cbt/aNYTHING fdhfgdh i struggled with it for a while but after a few therapists and meds that shit changed my life /pos

so many people have so much tension and make so many assumptions abt one another but its ok!! stop and think things thru! dont let ur emotions control and bully you!! lets communicate and vibe!!! and get these racist freaks out of here !!!!

#kit's questions! #d; youre a book thats not quite finished but ill watch you fill the page #ac; as sure as god made black and white #c; i love everybody because i love you ! #a; baby are you coming for the ride? #🥂💊; a chemical embrace that kicks you in the head #uhh #tw pregnancy #tw gun violence #tw med talk

[ineffable-doll]

Fic Throwback Thursday Friday whoops

inspired by @cyan-kelpie! Thanks for the push!

Fanfic writers: if there’s an old story of yours that never made it to tumblr, or got buried, or just hasn’t gotten much attention in a while, consider this an invitation to promote it! I would love to see my dash filled with fic recs I missed the first time around. You wrote the words, and you should be proud of them no matter how much time has passed. Add this note to your post, and let’s see how many writers we can get to self-promote! -----

I'm promoting a fic about Aziraphale and Crowley engaging in open, honest communication, because by Someone if that isn't what we all need right now. It also has the added benefit of being very asexually, aromantically queer, which is...not a phrase but I'm using it anyway.

Ahem.

"It Has Many Names" by IneffableDoll

G, 2.5k words

Published 1/22/21

Summary:

Crowley rolled his eyes, even though Aziraphale wasn’t looking at him. It was the principle of the thing. “I may be many things, angel – devastatingly handsome, devilishly charming, debonair and suave as fuck – but subtle? Subtle is not one of them.” ~ Aziraphale confesses feelings. Crowley returns those feelings. They have Actual Communication and discuss wants, perspectives, and aforementioned feelings in a healthy and mature way. (Where’s the drama? The angst? The miscommunications? Fuck if I know. Think they went following some bikers and ended up in a pile of fish.)

#good omens #good omens fanfiction #ineffable husbands #asexual #queer #aromantic

[tallerthantale]

So the main reason this isn't a direct reblog is that I don't think the writer meant it in the way it can come across, and I don't really mean for this to be a callout post.

An uncomfortably blunt response to [how this sort of phrasing can come across] under the cut. Read at your own risk.

The manner in which Crowley and Aziraphale are trapped is more absolute than our general concept of an abusive relationship, and that is a fair thing to observe.

However. Not all abusive relationships are that general concept. There are many situations that continue to exist modern day that trap people in ways we like to think of as historical.

Some abusive relationships are possible to get out of alive. Some are possible to get out of and be in a better place at the end of it. These things are true for some people, in some countries, some of the time.

When people want to confidently assert that exit options are available, they often go to thinking of all the various support organizations that exist to help people leave. You would have to live in a country that has those. You would also have to be a person who isn't legally the property of your abuser.

There are also people who do live in countries that have those originations, but the support isn't available to everyone. It's for citizens, and people with permanent visas.

There may be special provisions to cover the gaps for immigrants. They are almost certainly religiously based, and don't offer their services to people of certain 'lifestyles.'

You may even be in a country fortunate enough to have government emergency aid that is specifically available to immigrants fleeing abusive situations. The wait time for accessing any of it could be about 2-3 months.

You could gamble on community support, but that is a very fickle thing, even in communities that pride themselves specifically on how supportive and dedicated they are, and it will fail 9/10.

There are also ways to be legally dependent on your abuser while not literally their property. Consider someone in poverty in the US in a state without functional Medicaid, with a medical condition that is only stable through their abuser's insurance.

What if your abuser is your employer, and you loose your healthcare if you leave? What if they made a falsified trail of poor job performance reports to make sure that if you leave, no one will hire you again?

Consider someone who's legal right to be in a safe country depends on continuing the relationship. Maybe there are exit options designed for that situation, if you can prove it. What if you don't have proof?

What if you are so disabled, you can't communicate what is happening to anyone? What if the abuser is so charming, and you are so unwell, you have no credibility as a witness to your own experience?

A lot of these examples go to situations that could possibly be survivable if they tried to leave. But you don't know, and people do die trying.

I don't think people pushing the 'you can leave, it's just hard' narrative are intending to argue this about people who are slaves, or the property of their husbands, or are severely vulnerable due to disability or immigration status. I think that they forget that those people are part of the conversation, because it doesn't occur to them that most of the people in those situations can still access the internet, and many of them speak English.

#abuse cw #no description of specific abuse #but a lot of concepts people would rather not think about

[sushiandstarlight]

Your Love Keeps Me Whole

Read this story on AO3

Loosely based on this prompt by @goodomensprompts

Crowley collapsed over Aziraphale, a sticky mass of sweaty skin and feathers. A welcomed sticky mass of sweat and feathers. And he was going to show him how welcomed just as soon as his arms started working again.

"I've been thinking," the words were out before he could stop them, which was an increasing problem the more time he spent with Crowley- now that he had the space to question some things, he was questioning a lot of things and he had lost a lot of his verbal filters, "Though I'm not sure I should ask."

Crowley lifted his head slowly and pushed his damp hair off his forehead, blinking up at Aziraphale a little blankly.

"It can wait. Or, well, I could just keep it to myself. It's not terribly important, really."

"Not a minute ago, you were beyond words."

"Now, that's not accurate."

"I had you mewling like a kitten, don't you dare deny it, Angel." Crowley had crossed his arms over Aziraphale's chest with his chin resting on them.

"Mewling, really."

"Ask me."

"It's not important."

"It's important to me."

"Hmm." Instead of asking, the angel busied himself with tucking a lock of red hair behind Crowley's ear, fingers lingering there.

"No, nope, nuh-uh," Crowley grasped those fingers and kissed them gently before holding them in his own, "you're not going to distract me.  I'm curious now and you know I won't let it go until that curiosity is sated."

"I just wonder," the angel paused, lips flattening into a line as he pondered, "the other demons…"

Crowley swallowed, but motioned for him to get out with it.

"Well, you're different from them."

"Understatement of the millennia."

"I mean, well, they weren't… they weren't as human-looking as you."

Crowley blinked at him.

"Even at the airfield. I might think, maybe, that you look less-"

"Gross?"

"Demonic?"

"Gross."

Aziraphale huffed and frowned deeply.

"Fine. Not gross."

"I might think it's because you're on earth and they spend most of their time in Hell… But that's not it, is it?"

"Are you asking why I don't have a snake on my head?"

"I wasn't going to put such a fine point on it, dear."

"s'alright, though. Would it bother you if I did?" Crowley had averted his eyes.

"Of course not, it would be a part of you."

Crowley made a non-committal noise and Aziraphale took his chin in his hand.

"Are you hiding a snake from me, Crowley?"

At that Crowley started to laugh. Not a little laugh, but a deep belly laugh that morphed into what could only be described as a high pitch giggle the longer that Aziraphale stared at him.  He had tears streaming down his face before he finally got himself under control again.

"You," he sniffed and snickered, "you asking me if I'm happy to see you or if I have a snake in my pants, Angel?"

"You're not even wearing pants!"

"True," Crowley's face slipped from amusement to thoughtfulness, "I have a theory. Don't know if it's true." He rested his head on his arms, peering up at Aziraphale.

"What's your theory?"

"Love."

"What about it?"

"I think it's what keeps me from rotting."

"The fact that you love others keeps you from looking more demonic? I suppose that could be the case…"

"No. I think any demon can love. I think it's that I am loved."

Aziraphale cocked his head to the side and studied him.

“Angels are meant to be the heavenly host- they’re meant to commune with God Herself.  To feel Her love.”

“I follow you so far.”

“Demons are cast out of Heaven for the rest of time.  We’re separated from Her love.  It may or may not be true that She loves us, still.  But, we can’t feel it.  It’s as if it doesn’t exit.”

A shadow of sadness passed over Aziraphale’s face and Crowley squeezed his hand.

“It’s alright, really.  Well, for me.  See, I had someone else come along pretty quickly and care for me.  My fellow demons we’re so lucky.”

“Who could replace the love of God?”

“You, I think.”

“But, I wasn’t in love with you that quickly.”  He looked guilty just saying it.

“No, but you cared about what happened to me.  You cared about everyone then.  The first humans and me.”

“That’s true.”

“I mean, I didn’t exactly notice I was different at first.  We all looked pretty well the same.  But, over time they started to rot.  They got the companions on their heads.  And I… I didn’t.”

“Did the other demons notice?”

“Well, yeah, after a while.  I got pushed around a bit for being pretty every time I went downstairs.  Which is why I avoided it if I could.”

Aziraphale knew that there was a lot to unpack in the phrase “pushed around,” but decided to let it slide for now.  He squeezed Crowley’s hand and reached with his other hand to stroke his hair.

“You are beautiful.”

“Whatever,” Crowley scoffed, but his cheeks blushed a bright pink color that spread deliciously down his neck as Aziraphale watched, “I don’t remember exactly when the thought occurred to me, but it fit as well as anything.  None of the other demons had guardian angels.  And, it… Well, it took the sting out of any time you sent me away.  I would check the mirror and I would know you didn’t really mean it.”

“I never wanted to be away from you.  Not even in the beginning.”

“I know.  You needed time to come around to things on your own.  But, all the same, it was good to Know while I waited.”

“So you can’t feel my love?”

“Not the way you can, no.  But, that was never my thing anyway.  Even before.”

“But you believe it to be there.”

“I don’t have any reason to believe otherwise.”

“Crowley, that sounds something like Faith.”

“Faith based on my best understanding of the evidence.”  Crowley nodded, a stern look on his face.

“Really?”

“Oh, Angel, you know… if I was to put my faith in anything, it would be you.  Your love keeps me whole.”

Aziraphale struggled to keep his emotions at bay, but failed to keep his eyes from growing round and glassy.  He leaned down and pressed his lips to Crowley’s forehead.

“I would gladly have you in any form, love, but I’m happy to hold you like you are.”

Crowley hummed happily and closed his eyes and Aziraphale lay back, continuing to card his fingers through his hair.  Both, drifting peacefully.

#aziraphale x crowley #crowley x arizaphale #ineffable husbands #good omens #good omens fic #star light-reads #prompts #goodomensprompts

[sparkkeyper]

Whumptober 2020 Day 17: Dirty Secret

Aziraphale is repressed as heck where Heaven and his bosses are concerned, but drunken rambles with Crowley are cathartic.

***

"Aziraphale!"

Aziraphale nearly jumped off the park bench as the archangel clapped him jovially - too hard, always too hard - on the shoulder. "Gabriel!" He had a smile pasted on his face in record time, trying to cover up the shock of his boss' sudden appearance. "What a pleasant surprise! I-I wasn't expecting to hear from you for some time yet."

"Well, looks like your lucky day." God's messenger beamed down at him - it never reached the eyes quite right, must be a defect of the corporation - keeping the principality's shoulder in an iron grip. "It's been a while since we had a good chat, so I thought I'd stop in to give you your next assignment personally."

Aziraphale's face hurt from the smile. "How thoughtful. You're, ah, you're always welcome, of course!" He gestured to the bench beside him but Gabriel remained standing - he didn't even acknowledge the motion - his eyes alighting on the book in the principality's lap.

"Aren't you done that by now? I thought you were reading that...thing...last time I popped in, half a century ago?"

"Oh, this?" Aziraphale closed the pages to show off the cover. "I-It's a new book, actually. Much different than the one I was reading before. That was fiction, this one is an educational work on--"

Gabriel grabbed the book right out of his hand and every muscle in Aziraphale's body tensed up - to keep from doing something stupid, anything stupid, stay still, and don't let him see how stupid you can be if left unchecked too long - as the archangel flipped through the pages. "'A Brief History of Time'. Why would you ever need to know this? You've lived through Time since She began it. You haven't misremembered significant events from history, have you?"

Aziraphale chuckled - too tremulous, too nervous - but Gabriel did not smile back. "No, no of course not! I remember everything perfectly, as She intended." He swallowed. "The book is an introduction to quantum physics: the current science humans have developed in an effort to understand the workings of the universe. Quite a bit of it is wrong, of course, all that silliness about the galaxy being billions of years old, but they try. And they have managed to get some of it right. They've made such a lot of progress in the past few thousands years, for such short-lived individuals it really is remarkable--"

"Why do you need to bother reading this?" Gabriel's expression was blank - not blank, condescending, judging - "You know the workings of the universe, or at least all those that we need to know. The rest She has decided to keep to Herself, and we have no need to understand."

"Of course, of course!" Aziraphale's fingers itched to grab the book but it hadn't been offered back to him yet. He straightened his bowie instead. "But I...I must know how humans think the world works, you see. In order to communicate with them properly. I can't go giving away Heavenly secrets when humans haven't figured them out yet, can I? I've got to keep abreast of what they know and don't know so I can...speak to them on their level, as it were."

"I gotcha." Gabriel tossed the open book back to him, and he fumbled to catch it without scrunching up the pages. No such luck. "They're so bafflingly simple! It must be exhausting for you, having to dumb down every conversation you have with them. Don't know how you do it."

Aziraphale dared to smooth the pages by hand exactly once in Gabriel's presence - don't care too much for material things, don't care too much for the people who make them - and smoothing them by miracle was out of the question. "I manage."

"Excellent. And you can keep managing." The archangel handed over a folded slip of paper with a golden seal. "Next assignment. We'll need you in Algeria next month. Big earthquake planned, you'll have the opportunity to do a lot of Good there."

"I'm...looking forward to it."

"I bet you are. See you at your annual review." And with a shimmer, Gabriel was gone.

Aziraphale tucked the assignment into his pocket and closed his eyes, the only outward reaction he allowed himself to show. Inside he was hollering. Inside he was sagging and baring teeth and kicking up a fuss.

Stop it.

Of course he wasn't doing any of those things because he had control of himself, and after all they were completely uncalled for. Completely. It was just a visit from Gabriel. He had no reason to react in such a way.

It took several minutes of sitting perfectly still on the bench to convince his body of that fact. It was difficult when his heart was racing and his fists were clenched but he managed. He always managed. He had to.

When he opened his eyes to return to his reading at last, he found a small scrap of paper tucked between the pages like a bookmark. It certainly hadn't been there when Gabriel handed - threw - the book back to him. Flipping over the note, he recognized Crowley's untidy scrawl.

Dinner tonight? If I don't bitch to someone about my coworkers I'm gonna explode. -C

Aziraphale did sag this time. Just reading the words was like a weight sliding off his shoulders. He tried very, very hard not to think about that fact. Or the fact that such a note had shown up right after a visit from Gabriel.

He gave himself a moment to exist - revel - in the feeling of relief, then very carefully collected himself and reached into his pocket for a pen. He scribbled a reply on the paper and with a snap, willed it back to wherever it had come from.

Be here by six and not a minute after. - A

***

Dinner was Italian, and delicious. The wine afterwards in the bookshop's back room was equally Italian and equally delicious.

Crowley sprawled across the sofa, one leg up on the back and several bottles in, and ranted about Hastur in a series of increasingly-less-eloquent turns of phrase. Aziraphale leaned heavily over the arm of his own chair, an equal number of bottles in, and agreed emphatically to the insults the demon heaped on his boss. It was relaxing to listen to Crowley ramble. If his unfortunate interactions with his lower downs seemed familiar... Well, best not to think on it. And he didn't have to think on it, not with Crowley. He could sit back and listen and add in a few scornful words against whomever had ruffled Crowley's feathers this decade.

"Not an ounce of doco...decorum between them," the demon was saying. "Not a one. Rude as...rude things. And your higher ups, bet they're just the same. How've they been lately?"

"Oh, you know," Aziraphale waved the question away, steadying himself on the chair as the motion overbalanced him. "Can't complain." It was true, he thought, and giggled a bit at his private drunken joke. He couldn't complain. No matter how much... Well. He couldn't.

"Aw, come on, I gave you all the juicy bits." Crowley hung his head backwards off the arm of the couch to regard the angel upside down. "There's got to be something ol' Gabe does that gets on your nerves. Or Michael! Real stick in the mud, that Michael. Stick in the mud and straight up the arse."

"Oh hush, you." The angel tossed a coaster at him. "They're perfectly stand-up people, as they're supposed to be. Divinely dictated and...and such." The demon, still upside down, pulled a face to let Aziraphale know exactly what he thought of that. "Although, d'you know--" Aziraphale hiccupped, "--Gabriel doesn't even know to clip the...the whatdyoucallits. The thread on the back of new coats that keep the tails closed. The ones you're supposed to clip. Just...walks around with the thread still in like...like someone who doesn't know how to clip things."

Crowley cackled, rolling upright again and contorting on the couch in a manner Aziraphale didn't know was physically possible." Bet he doesn't know to clip the thread holding the tiny pockets closed either."

"He doesn't!" the angel exclaimed with far more delight than was necessary. Something warm and petty and satisfying was settling under his ribs. Threads and pockets were good. Safe. Unsafe thoughts still hovered just beyond the edges of his mind, but he didn't have to look too closely at those when there were safe things like fashion faux-pas he could inject their venom into. "He was telling me just last month how silly humans are to make pockets that are decorar...dectora...just for show, and he used his own coat as an example! I tried to tell him, I said, I said 'Gabriel, you can cut those open you know' or at least I would have said it but I couldn't get a word in edgewise. And he still hasn't figured it out!"

"Point for me!" Crowley stabbed the air like a contestant on a game show. "I came up with those, didju know? Sewing the tiny pockets closed? And I got an archangel with it, so plus one to Hell!"

Aziraphale barked out a laugh that was too loud, too explosive, but heavens did it feel good. "Did you really? Or did you just take credit?"

"Absolutely came up with them." Crowley puffed up his chest with pride. "Annoys loads of people when they wear clothes out for the first time and go to put something in the pocket but find they don't have any scissors. I wrote a whole report on it for Hastur--" he lowered his voice to a hiss and leaned in conspiratorially. "But mostly I just think it's funny." He broke into a drunken giggle and Aziraphale followed. "Pro'lly never read the report anyway, Hastur." The demon tried to pour himself another glass and missed, missed, got it. "Tha's another thing that drives me up the wall, nobody reads the blessed reports half the time!"

The angel groaned in commiseration.

"I spend all that time putting the thing together, crossing the I's, dotting the T's--"

"You don't dot T's," Aziraphale interrupted.

"Dot my T's if I like," Crowley shot back.

"They'd look very silly."

"I'll dot your T's."

"Suppose we'd look silly together at least."

"Damn straight." Crowley paused. "What was I taking about?"

"T's," the angel supplied helpfully.

"Reports! Right, nobody reading the fu- You spend all that time on them and nobody appreciates the work!"

"Aggravating," agreed Aziraphale sourly, because of course it wasn't against any rules to repeat someone else's whinging back to them.

"Exasperating!"

"Infuriating!"

"And you know what else is infuriating?" Crowley put both feet up on the coffee table and stretched. "They had me Downstairs doing paperwork all last month and Ligur comes by while I'm trying to cross reference soul contracts and just snatches the ledger away while I'm working."

"The nerve!" Aziraphale snorted disdainfully, taking a long pull from the wine.

"I know! Had so many ways I wanted to react I couldn't choose!" Crowley gestured to him, and if Aziraphale had been a touch more sober he might have caught a glint in the demon's eye. "What would you do, angel?"

"What?"

"You. Imagine you're in Hell, doing paperwork and minding your own blessed business, making sure all the T's are dotted, and Ligur comes up out of nowhere and snatches your book away! What do you do to him?"

"I should like to snatch it right back!" Aziraphale slapped the cushion next to him. "And then give him a good whack with it! Serves him right!"

"Aye! Serves 'im right!" Crowley echoed in fierce delight, lunging forward to clang his glass against the angel's in a sloppy toast.

And when the wine wore off several hours later, Aziraphale would admit to himself that he felt so much better.

***

*The book is 'A Brief History of Time: From the Big Bang to Black Holes" by Stephen Hawking

**The 2003 earthquake in Algeria killed ~2200 people. Gabriel is an asshole.

#whumptober2020 #good omens #My writing #My fic #Aziraphale #Aziraphale is repressed af #Good omens heaven is full of assholes #Good omens Gabriel #Less whump I guess but this has been kicking around in my head lately #How does Crowley get his information we just don't know #Crowley

[holycatsandrabbits]

Good AUmens fic: The Poet’s Eye

Human AU with firefighter Crowley and poet Aziraphale

Read it on Ao3

Excerpt: (Note that Aziraphale is called Ambrose in this fic)

Ambrose watched Crowley stir into wakefulness just after the sun had fully risen. Ambrose was wearing a robe, sitting at the desk in his bedroom, scribbling out lines and phrases and sketches, trying to somehow capture Crowley on paper.

Ambrose had never recited poetry during sex before, let alone written poetry while holding someone in his arms. He had, on occasion, stayed up all night frantically filling a notebook with ideas. Just not while staring at the man who’d shagged him the night before until he’d seen stars and all manner of other visions.

Ambrose realized what had happened around three a.m., when he was in the middle of a series of drawings focusing on the line of Crowley’s neck as it curved up from his shoulder and then met the pillow. Ambrose had fallen into using the poet’s eye during sex, and he was still using it now, unable to stop seeing Crowley as a living work of art. It was the way he’d first glimpsed Crowley in the park, and here, with the beautiful firefighter lying naked in his bed, Ambrose was filling notebooks about him. The poor man had become his muse.

This is a spicy one, folks!!

As always, this fic is finished and a new chapter will post every other day!

See more AUmens fics: @go-events​  Thanks so much to the wonderful community creating these works and to @bisasterdi​ for hosting!

Tumblr-Ao3: HolyCatsAndRabbits

Twitter-Insta-FB: Dannye Chase

Now taking fic commissions for original characters!

#Dannye writes #Good AUmens #Good Omens #Good Omens human AU

[thepringlesofblood]

been binging good omens fanfic lately to cope with the fact that i’m gonna have to wait an entire extra month to go back to school, and figured i should add to that ‘good omens fanfic bingo’ thing i saw floating around here lately that’s got funny little commonalities in a lot of em, bc there’s a surprising amount

tbh I’m gonna make a google doc of all the entries I’ve seen on here plus a few of my own to toss in a generator, feel free to send some in (NOT A SEX THING, genuinely just for laughs), here’s the ones I got so far

“ngk”

“For go- er, for sat- uh, for somebody’s sake!” or any variation thereof

an AU that bends over backwards to find a way to make Crowley call Aziraphale ‘angel’ in a universe in which he is not

similarly, an AU that desperately tries to fit an ‘I gave it away’ ‘You what?’ scene

Oscar Wilde, Freddie Mercury, and/or Shakespeare and the implication that at some point, one of them fucked one or more of them. 

Adam powers/Crowley’s imagination as a deus ex machina

the phrase ‘make an effort’ 

getting wine drunk in the back of the bookshop with your hereditary enemy

Crowley walks like a slut because God cursed him/mention of the whole ‘god cursed the serpent to crawl’ thing

Title is a Queen lyric/song title

the implication that the Bentley is sentient

you go too fast for me Crowley, in any scenario, regardless of appropriateness

Gabriel’s a dick and no one likes him

mention of being ‘soft’/Aziraphale is fat and there’s nothing you can do about it

wings and/or ‘true forms’

sparsely researched, sometimes incorrect snake things applying to Crowley 

going on a picnic or dining at the Ritz/ general a/c taking each other out to restaurants and theater and such

“my dear” or “angel”

Aziraphale eats something and Crowley is like ‘fuck yeah that’s what we like to see folks’

Varying opinions on how many books Aziraphale actually sells/Aziraphale chases customers away

the period of time after they take the bus back to London in the miniseries, and before switching bodies, or mention of it

Aziraphale wakes Crowley up because he hadn’t heard from him in a while and got worried/Crowley sleeping

An AU that makes Aziraphale’s name completely ridiculous to fit the world and/or Aziraphale having to come up with a last name and fucking it up royally

the queer community of Soho has adopted Aziraphale, or the other way around

the requisite ‘there was only one bed’, usually in Crowley’s flat after the bus

Aziraphale seeing that statue of ‘good triumphing evil’ or whatever and there being an awkward moment about it and/or some line about how ‘it’s funny, Crowley had been over to the bookshop so many times, but Aziraphale had never been to his flat before’

mention of ‘I only ever asked questions’

outsider POV of a/c is like ‘wow that was fucked up, anyway back to my stamp collection’ - bonus points if they assume a/c are a couple when they’re not (yet)

use of the word ‘miraculous’, and/or extensive discussion of miracles

Aziraphale reads to Crowley bc he’s not good at reading for snake reasons/Crowley is kind of dyslexic

(usually bad) poetry/song lyrics at completely inappropriate times

a/c are riding in the bentley and the lyrics on the radio are just a bit too applicable, bonus points if it’s Queen, specifically ‘Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy’

the phrases ‘bebop’ and/or ‘tickety-boo’ 

accidentally inspiring an artist to do great work

‘oh, was that my side or yours?’ and/or bickering over which things are heaven and which are hell and/or ending up deciding it was just humans who were fucked up, whaaaaaaat

similarly, mention of being ‘on our own side’

funny names for the apocalypse that didn’t happen - my favorites so far are ‘Armageddon’t’ and ‘Apocalmost’

shadwell isn’t in an AU/story where he should be because he just failed the vibe check from the author

an AU with Madame Tracy in a totally unexpected role because they needed someone to be the innkeeper/traveling salesman/town crier/big bad beetleborg/whatever the fuck the story required, and wanted to include her bc she rocks

Aziraphale compliments Crowley’s eyes, and he does a ‘ngk’ of some sort

wow, after the miniseries we all just sort of collectively agreed that Crowley fell in love with Aziraphale seconds after meeting him, huh?

mention of some incredibly specific moment in the last 6000 years/reference to the phrase ‘6000 years’ bonus points if it’s a scene from the miniseries like the bastille or rome

mentioning the garden of eden at completely random times

crepes and/or apples having symbolism

every fucking person seems to think michael sheen has these fuckin cerulean orbs and is busy getting lost in the baby blue ocean of his iris well guess what he doesn’t, and it is literally never mentioned in the book or series or radio drama. how did we get here.

speaking of, the author tries to find a really pretty synonym for yellow or red to describe crowley’s eyes or hair and lands squarely in over-the-top metaphor

the Bentley is not a car in an AU, but dammit if the author is going to leave a good opportunity for a cameo unwritten. bonus points if it’s an animal of some kind

significance tied to Crowley taking off his sunglasses/looking someone in the eyes

‘i’m not nice’ or any variant of Crowley trying to justify his demon-ness, or vice versa w/ Aziraphale being like ‘i simply couldn’t, i am an angel’

philosophical discussion of the human experience/the dichotomy of good and evil/the impact of god’s existence or lack thereof, etc. bonus points if they’re wasted

the point is...the point is.../crowley remembering something he meant to say much earlier and just shouting it a la ‘they’re what water slides off of’

ducks (no really, you’d be surprised how often people just work ducks into their fic somehow)

Crowley + plants, bonus points for psychological examination of why he yells at them, extra bonus points for talking to them about his many woes 

mention of the objects/plants/animals around them being slightly sentient e.g. ‘the wine was very surprised to find itself to have aged significantly in an instant’ or ‘the door knew better than to lock Crowley out of the bookshop’ 

some rando human does something nice and Aziraphale cures their arthritis or something, or vice versa w the rando pissing off Crowley so he ties their shoes together 

the South Downs/what if we moved into a cottage by the sea

idiot plot/unbelievable miscommunication, except it is believable bc they’re idiots

historical period that the author is clearly an expert in and wants to show off 

snake Crowley (Snowley) - bonus points if he’s scaring off customers in the bookshop, extra bonus points for mentions of Crowley being nervous about the relative unpopularity and widespread misconceptions about snakes 

mention of the stars/Crowley creating them

I really need to get a hobby

anyway, put any extra suggestions in the notes, and I’ll link to the bingo card

update: it did not let me put all of these bc too many characters but it still works

#good omens #a/c #original post

[nightsnonsense]

Perhaps this is a Hot Take™, but as a queer person old enough to have very little formative concept of Representation In Mass Media, especially beyond queer-coded villains and the occasional Butt of The Joke (looking at you, the 90s & early 2000s), I cannot begin to see how people who are part of the LGBT+ community don’t see how deeply in love Crowley & Aziraphale are.

This is only compounded, I think, by my being an adult well past the Terrible Uncertainty of Puberty and Adolescent Feelings. That’s not to diminish the impact and potential depth of falling for someone as a kid/teen/young adult of the near-18, pre-drinking-in-America-legally persuasion; rather, that is merely to say that all this talk of “but they didn’t kiss or outright say I Love You, therefore It’s Not Canon” feels like it completely oversimplifies and wraps in far too tiny a box the matter of love, especially between queer folk. It simply overlooks how much of love is so much more than that easily wrapped box.

I’m not just saying that as your local queer fan-of-many-things, used to taking scraps in this department. This is coming from someone who’s spent a great deal of time looking at romance as a whole, heteronormative and queer alike, and yes, someone who can distinguish between a Bad/Insubstantial-But-Fun-Like-Popcorn Romance and a Bad-No-Really-Just-Bad-And-Ill-Conceived Romance, and a Life-Changing-Stars-Have-Moved Romance.

What seems to be flying over the head of so many people who are upset or calling ‘queerbait’ on Good Omens is that many deep romances of the past - of all gender combos - deal in ‘I Love You’s’ that are said, portrayed, made painfully, beautifully clear without the words being uttered at all.

It comes in all forms... Physicality. Expressions. Eye contact - or the lack there of. The way words are spoken - I love you’s, in phrases and situations where I love you’s just wouldn’t fit.

Where sometimes, I love you couldn’t be said. Because of our roles, because of our jobs, because of our families.

So ways were found to say I love you, without uttering those beautiful, dangerous words.

Queer people have seen themselves in the outcasts for generations - for, I’d argue, much of history itself. Wherever we are not wanted, we band together; we see those that are also not wanted and we say “we see you, and you are not alone; we are here too. We may be different, but our stories sing the same themes.”

People far more eloquent than I have explained why queer people identify so frequently with those that love and embrace the supernatural, the fae, the otherwise estranged, the seemingly unknown, the misunderstood. We have grown to read between the lines - to see the love where even sometimes the straight creators deny it vehemently;

But, we argue, Why do you think we resonate with it? Why do you think we see love between these characters, these characters that are growing and changing because of, for, alongside one another - we see them change and learn and hope and trust again because of this one person, we see the looks they exchange, the way their hands brush by or grasp at one another, the way their emotions culminate upon loss, upon regaining.

They are the world to one another, we know, we share. We gesture to generations worth of characters, joy and sorrow and anger and hope in our faces. And you say they don’t love one another, because they share the same gender?

... forever Death of the Author, it is often preached-

-with an asterisk for us, we know too well.

But then there is the Good Omens TV adaptation, and here - here, I, a queer woman who grew up knowing the danger of holding another girl just a little too dearly, who knows the risks of saying I love you where almost every wall has ears, who knows the way you can only hope the clasp of a hand under a blanket, the held gaze across a crowded table holds a thousand thoughts, the quiet peace slipping out the window to sit in the back of a truck and stare at the stars, not daring to hope all wishes could come true-

- here I see two characters, two beings of the same ineffable gender, spending over 6000 years falling in love despite what they are told, despite what they are expected to do, despite what they are expected to value.

I see them say I love you. Again, and again, and again. Over the span of centuries.

So many I love you’s, given in ways I’ve learned fluency in as well as English.

I love you, in a glance - the unexpected crush.

I love you, in catching a slip of the tongue // in slipping up, if it’s with you.

I love you, in relief at you showing up after all // in showing up, even to the gloomy ones.

I love you, in knowing what you being caught together would mean // in knowing... what you being caught together would mean.

I love you, in your arrival only ever being good news to me // in always showing up when you’re in a bind.

I love you, in refusing you at last on an outright request // in requesting the impossible.

I love you, in truly realizing at last.

I love you, in going too fast // in walking the desperate precipice.

I love you, in the little things // in anything, for you.

I love you, in feeling temptingly safe // in empty posturing to maintain a shakey line.

I love you, in losing you.

I love you, in I can still reach you, and I will no matter what.

I love you, in being in it till the end - together.

I love you, in peace amongst one another - in being our own side.

I love you, in I found you.

I love you, in accepting myself, too.

...

For the love of the stars, of all that is good and ineffable, please, please don’t make the mistake of confusing a lack of an Ultimate Kiss or the words themselves for being the same as a show vehemently denying the romance, the partnership between two people drawn together over the course of millennia.

I love you is written in every scene of theirs - the highs, the lows, the lost, the gain, the utter joys and everything in between.

I love you, between two beings that have inadvertently become the godfathers of humanity, not just the not-antichrist.

I love you, between two beings knowing they’ve got eternity... barring interference of the holy or hellish varieties. And so far, they’ve managed just fine on staving off that interference... together.

This is a love story between queer people in ways that no other queer romance portrayed at significant scale has managed to quite touch - including how “I love you” is most often spoken in actions, in looks, in everything between the lines... and behind the lines themselves, if you know how to listen.

Please, take a step back, and listen again; watch again. See, this time, the I love you in their every action - purposefully, not in accidental homoeroticism to be later denied. The love that grows against all odds, against all pressure, against all other consideration.

I promise, you won’t be disappointed, if you just learn to see romance and love through a broader lens.

#good omens #good omens meta #ineffable husbands #long post #i love you #comes in so many more forms than just the words #and frankly #good omens is the best romance i've seen in the longest time #and i mean that