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ticholasnesla · 4 months

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Nimona (2023), friends.

First of all thank u to the people who made these great gifs!!! This is presumptuous of me but i truly hope u dont mind me featuring them! This is the first of - hopefully many - years of my Media Gifventure for the Holiday Season of 2023. I will go into more details if i need. So.

🥺

man of the hour. Man of the Year. Gold Star. 🌟

Gif use Disclaimer, I hope me making this post with these gifs isnt overstepping 🙂‍↕️💛 people who upload gifs, which, 9/10 times, they made themselves, are one of the most supportive vertebrae communities of Tumblr. 🫡👏👏 bravo chudovyy splendid чудовий mykola please tell me what i should remove and i will remove.

Above all else, Thank u.

anyways here's3 something i hope is going to be fun. Last chance. Gif heavy, flash warning excessive emojis, stupid shite and a dog.

🐕 . . . 🤎

nimona beat my ass yall. It beat my family's ass yall.

That's a Ss²+Gold ranked film if ever i saw one. Congrats Neæs@tflix - Nimona, and congrats ND Stevenson.

Ss²+Gold means Soupsoup Squared PLUS Gold which MEANS

+4 of thees bad boys!!!!!!!!

Enjoy!

i stop talking about strictly Nimona Heere.

so with that all said and done...i was Thinking... part 2?

disclaimer pls read the 👎 RULES. Trans rights human rights. Protect trans kids. Pronouns for your Hostess this evening are she/he/they. this isnt a nft thing so dont talk to me about that. and im not writing free reviews or reading your book. I just wanna award movies and webtoons and webcomics without putting any real artistic effort in (except when i WANT to put real artistic effort in) and also feature some great indie/non indie stuff In a (hopefully) positive light 🔮 shit i might even do requests. Or sketches. Imagine. 🐙

PROCEED 👎to RULES and engage in critical thought and problem soliving before sending me asks.💢

That being said, keep it PG. All asks are good asks and i will develop an FAQ if need be!

Rules 👎 down dere keep scrolling and reading. Thx. But first

Do u wanna submit something to be considered for a Soup GoldTM? Submit your favourite,

Webcomic

Youtube channel

Trending topic

Webtoon

youtube series

Manga

Anime

Plot twists

Lesser known artists

Indie artists

Podcasts

Heartbreaks /no actual bummers pls.

Memes etc etceteree

that kept you warm this 2023! And for my immediate needs, Happened in 2023. For this thing, i will only accept submissions til new yrs day. Is that peechy?

👎👎Ok finally rules for real. Proceed to pig 🐷 for tldr

Keep it pg🦉

K.I.S.S - keep it simple, Saoirse🦆

Stay in your Lane 🫎🦍🐏🪿

Dont message strangers on the internet if you're under 18.🔴And if you do KEEP your age out of their inbox. 🪺🐣🐊

Adult media is fine but i want to keep it Prime Time 🦐🐚 🪸🪼🐠🚦🐬

66I know i might be typing like a fucking bunyak but i wanna have FUN and talk about FUN STUFF my past 3 years has been ROUGH, BAYBEE. I miss my parents, Tails. I miss them a lot. /not a joke.

💐🦋🕊🐝🦂🦈🐄🐓🦤🦀🦀🦅🪱🥀🦽🏥🏥🏥🏥🏥🏥🫀🌎☀️🌜🪐🌬🌪🌦🌈☔️🔥☃️🎅🏡🎆🪻🌷💐🫀🐦‍⬛🚜👨‍🌾💚🤟💒💊🌋🏞🎡🛝🚛🚚🛻🚲

I am but flesh n blood n bone.

Please keep in mind i will only do what i have the jnj marbles for, but i will dedicate a lot of my downtime to this and i really want to have a good experience so um if u know a friend, or maybe want to tag cool accounts to maybe look over here yoo hoo hi there hello and do u wannaaa 🐕🐕🐕

Click that rebwog pwease 🥺 pppwease. Ding that like button smash that like button Uw0

This only works on Good Will so dont Play with my heart. We want to have fun.

I do have a DO NOT PASS GO list in my head but i wont reveal whats on it til i come across it ya? 🦩

Thank y for reading the rules. Now.

Me vs you the reader

Proceed to pig for tldr🐷

The Soup Golds and other Soups utilize a vector of Grandma's Soup from Lengend of Zelda Wind Waker that i edited with my phone. I do not claim to own this graphic and am just fucking around.

Submissions that dont pass my sneefing test are welcome and valuable! Incoming bee gif:

🐝

love rubbin my dusty little fingers in new Things and readings. So they will be rewarded either with Unseen, Uninterested, or Unwatchable badges, and might be featured as (dis)/honorable mentions! More nuance on that if the need arises. 🦄🔮👀

🐷Asks are open / pending! Feel free to Lurk/ask questions. Dont be rude or ELSE..u get The PIG 🐷🐷

✋️HYYYYYY

🤘🪑YAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!🐖🐖🐖🐖💨💨💨💨💨💨💨💥⚰️🪦🐽🍄

.. and then the Anon is going off. i dont want to have to do that. 🫠

🐗Let's keep it Frosty🐗

🐖💨💨💨💨Inbox closes Boxing Day! Get ur submissions in Today and get some fun ?

Write a letter and leave me a cookie pls. Im not asking for money i just wanna spend some quality time with u as we ____ 2024.

Here is the dog btw and she's a rottweiler mix.. She's sitting on my foots here and has curly furs all a on her butt. She was a foster fail and is living her best cushy life last i heard about her. I wanna see her again. 🖤🤎🧡🖤🤎🧡

The end. Play Sims 4 but try not to spend money on it. EA's starting to offer free packs that u can download for Free. Console and PC as far as i understand.

Love u. Be back soon.

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ao3feed-undertale1 · 16 days

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Some Rotten Cherries we have here.

read it on AO3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/55181527 by Pupz_Writingz A good maybe 1-2 years have passed since the imprisonment of Nightmare and his gang. The swap brothers were just having a relaxing night when all of a sudden this raggedy lookin Sans comes stumbling on out from the forest and into their backyard. The fun part is that he looks like Blue. The not so fun part is how high his LV is. Anyway, The fell brothers get word of this. So let the chaos begin!! Aka, I'm being completely self indulgent and this is me writing a fanfic about my Rotten lil son and him falling in love with Red because why not. I fell down this rabbit hole, might as well start makin my bed to lie in. Words: 1175, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English Fandoms: Undertale (Video Game) Rating: Not Rated Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Categories: M/M Relationships: Papyrus/Papyrus (Undertale), Sans/Sans (Undertale), Sans & Sans (Undertale) Additional Tags: Underfell Sans (Undertale), Underfell Papyrus (Undertale), Underswap Sans (Undertale), Underswap Papyrus (Undertale), A bit of Spicyhoney in the background, because why not?, Though this is more of a Sans/Sans fic, Not Red and Blue., More so Red and my own lil fucked up son., His name is Rottenberry, If you know me from Tumblr congrats on finding me, High chance I may or may not finish this, Warnings will be put at the beginning of chapters, Because I will forget to put them in here, If you find this and you know my Tumblr then like- Just @ me and I'll give u a gold star, You also get bragging rights, :3, I probably might mischaracterize characters. So be warned, I only know mostly fanon, Sadly, I'm gonna try my best to keep them mostly in character!!, Promise, Possible slowburn unless my ADHD gets impatient read it on AO3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/55181527

#ao3feed #ao3undertalefeed #fanfic #undertale #undertale-fanfic

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legendary-cookies · 3 years

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I redrew these draw the squads that I posted basically when I first made this blog

Think of this as a months late anniversary for this blog lmao

Improvement amiright

#sea fairy cookie #moonlight cookie #fire spirit cookie #wind archer cookie #i created this blog on like january 1st so this 'anniversary' is super super late #but like better late than never amiright haha #this blog is officially one year and a half old #basically anyway #but to be serious i'm so surprised how far this blog has come #to be honest it wasn't exactly my intention for it to be an ask blog and yet here we are #with the asks still closed nervous laugh #i've improved so much from when i created this blog to now and so have my legendary babies #i'm so grateful for everything that's happened and for all of you who stuck around #anyway #enough being cheesy lmao #if you've read this far in the tags congrats #here's a gold star

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kitkatd7 · 4 years

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Christmas Party

Summary: You’re having a great Christmas eve… until you aren’t. You’re being bullied and Loki isn’t having any of it.

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Warnings: Angst! self-consciousness, bullying/belittling, cursing, fluff ending

Requests:

Requested by @myraiswack: Hello love, congrats again on 500!!! Could I request a prompt thing for Loki with 4. “Leave me alone” angst prompt but then a fluffy end with 9. “Hold me” (so kinda a hurt & comfort thing? Idk you can do whatever😁💕) Thank you so much 😘

Requested by @cap-n-stuff: Hi! Can I get an angst to fluff with Loki?? Thanks!

Prompts: “You have to kiss me if we’re under the mistletoe.” (Season of Fiction Writing Challenge)

Word Count: 1482

A/N: This is for @star-spangled-beard-burn Season of Fiction Writing Challenge!! Congratulations again, and I hope you enjoy it! Beta read by the beautiful @rhemasky and the ever wonderful @cap-n-stuff thanks lovelies <3

Prompts will be in bold (Poem is not mine and I take no credit for it, I’m borrowing it from google)

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You’re at Tony’s Christmas party with your boyfriend, Loki, and everything is perfect. The food is amazing, all of your friends are present, and you’re all watching Tony, who’s drunk, and singing Deck the Halls with the wrong lyrics. And to top it all off- You feel beautiful for the first time in a long time. Not that Loki didn’t tell you every chance he had how gorgeous you were- but having someone tell you and feeling it are two very different things. But tonight- Tonight is different. You look gorgeous; you feel gorgeous. A dark green dress hugs your skin delicately, accenting your curves. The golden sparkles that start at the top gently cascade down the strapless dress, thinning out until they disappear just before the hem of your skirt. Your hair twisted back into soft waves, held by golden pins. The necklace you never take off you rests at the hollow of your throat; An elegant gold star with small white gems. It was a present from Loki, gifted along with a poem:

I want to invite you for a walk

To a quiet place; in the moor.

When the breeze sings serenades,

One of those nights-

The moon is full.

A restless pounding invades my heart

When I think of my confidants-

The stars.

If only they could speak,

What would they say?

If you could hear them speak,

For they know my fondness for you

And that in my thoughts,

There is no other one.

If only the stars could speak

They will tell you that I love you.

They would ask you,

To love me back.

That was how he told you he loved you. The memory wraps around you in a warm haze as you smile up at Loki. His grip tightens around your waist as he presses a kiss to the top of your head, and you sigh contentedly.

“Do you want champagne, love?”

You hum a yes, watching as his dark, deliciously clad form disappears into the crowd.

You roll your eyes upon hearing a high pitched voice call your name. You turn, coming face to face with one of Tony’s countless guests. Lord knows how she got an invite.

“Aren’t you Loki’s ex-girlfriend?” She asks, not waiting for a reply as her friends shoot you a pitiful look. “That is so sad! I can’t believe it. Everyone thought you guys would work out- But can you really blame him for breaking up with you?” She snarks, tone shifting as she eyes you demeaningly.

“What? No, we didn’t break-”

“I mean, sure, you’re sort of cute, in your own way. But honestly, you're not good enough for him anyway. It’s probably for the best. You’ve got too many… How can I put this lightly?” She pauses thoughtfully, her hand under her chin in fake contemplation. “...Imperfections.” She finally says maliciously as her friends nod in faux sympathy.

“Also, you’re obviously way too clingy- Guys don’t like that.” She hums, shaking her head disapprovingly. “Loki needs a more confident girl. Prettier. Thinner. Someone like- well, someone like me, I suppose,” she says casually, eyes glinting assertively.

All the air is pushed from your lungs as you choke back sobs.

Loki’s eyebrows furrow as he watches you whirl away from a group of women and push your way aimlessly through the crowd. He grabs your arm lightly as you turn to face him, looking up at him with tears in your eyes.

“My love, what’s wrong?” He asks, cupping your face gently when you shake your head and try to step away. He whispers your name, his eyes clouding in confusion. “Tell me what they said,” he prompts you gently. Blinking back fresh tears, you pull away. “Leave me alone,” you whisper hoarsely before rushing out, vanishing in the mass of bodies.

He looks around for the source of your pain, his eyes scanning the crowd so intently he doesn’t notice Thor come up beside him. “Are you alright, brother? You look tense.”

“I’m fine. It’s Y/N. Someone upset her greatly, and I think it only fair I return the favor,” Loki growled, striding across the floor with purpose, his eyes glinting.

Stalking up to her, Loki glares daggers, his words dripping with venom. “I don’t know what exactly you said to Y/N, but I know the general context- If you think for even a moment that you are worth more than she is, you are desperately wrong. She’s the most beautiful, intelligent, gentle person I’ve ever met, and to call her anything less than that is simply your resentment overtaking the little sense you have. She is worth more than you could possibly imagine, and she deserves for you to treat her with more respect than anyone here. The only reason you aren’t begging for your life right now is because of her and the restraint she taught me. Consider yourselves lucky we didn’t meet a year ago. Now. Get. Out,” Loki snarls, eyes flashing with barely contained rage.

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Some minutes later, Loki opens the door to your room softly, slipping inside to find you perched on the edge of the bed, smudged mascara and drying tears mixing on your cheeks. Your dress in a forgotten heap on the floor, replaced with sweatpants and a hoodie that you never gave back to him. He crouches in between your thighs, his hands resting gently on your legs. All his quick wit evades him, and he finds himself unable to conjure the perfect words to ease your pain. “I’m sorry.”

You burst into fresh tears, burying your head into his shoulder, and all he can do is hold you as you try to find the words. “She’s right, you know?” You murmur, sitting up as a mirthless laugh passing through your lips as Loki looks at you in confusion.

“What was she right about, darling?”

“That I’m not like her. I can never be like her- I’ll never look like her, or sound like her, or act like her. I can never be that perfect. She was right about everything. She was right that I’ll never be good enough for anyone. But I’ll especially never be good enough for you-”

Your sentence cuts off as Loki’s lips capture yours, his hands cup your face as he kisses you with such a confident passion that it leaves you breathless when he pulls away. Resting his forehead against yours, he stares deeply into your eyes. “Don’t ever say that you aren’t good enough for me again. It is I who isn’t worthy of you, my love. But she’s right-” He starts as you look at him in shock. “-That you aren’t like her... And that’s why I love you.” He huffs lightly to himself, brushing the back of his hand against the soft skin of your cheek while gazing at you like you hung the moon in the sky. “I don’t want you to be like her. I don’t want you to try to look or sound or act any differently than you are- Because as soon as you try to be someone else, you lose yourself. Darling, perfect is not a real thing. Perfect is a mask, an image of what someone else wants you to be. To be perfect is to be fake and to let go of every ounce of life in your being. I love you exactly the way you are, and always will.”

You stare at Loki in complete surprise, your lips parted slightly, at a loss for words.

He kisses you again with a dominating sweetness that you’ve never felt before. His lips are fierce and compelling against your own as you lean into him, all of the pain you felt slipping away into memory at the caring touch and soothing presence of your lover.

“Hold me.” It comes out a breathless plea against his lips as he gathers you in his arms and moves you both to the headboard.

You snuggle into him, your head on his chest and his arms securely around you. Anchoring you. “This isn’t exactly how I imagined us spending Christmas.” You hum tiredly against his skin in agreement.

Before you can slip into sleep, you hear him murmur your name. Your eyebrows furrow at the soft expression on his face and the light dancing in his eyes. “You have to kiss me if we’re under the mistletoe,” he whispers.

“Loki, there isn’t any-” You huff before following his gaze to the ceiling where there is, in fact, mistletoe. “That’s cheating.” you chuckle, leaning closer instinctively, eyes flicking between his and his lips.

“Mm, perhaps. But if I get a kiss from you then it’s worth it.” He charms, lips curving into a warm smile.

You sigh, into the kiss in pleasure and exhaustion before nestling back into his side. Maybe this isn’t a terrible way to spend Christmas.

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What did you think? Please feel free to let me know!

Drop an ask, dm, comment (anything really) If you would like to be added (or removed) from a taglist!

Permanent tag list: @lovesmesomehiddles @saiyanprincessswanie @kind-sober-fullydressed @remibarnes22 @romainniesweetheart @angelinathebook @star-spangled-beard-burn @itsunclebucky @teenagereadersciencenerd @chaotic-fae-queen @bugsbucky @cap-n-stuff @imma-new-soul @wonderlandfandomkingdom @fablesrose @coffeebooksandfandom

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radio-charlie · 6 years

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♧ 'eyyyy

@maimakan tagging you in this coz it will get pushed p far back by reblogs (I’ll be up all night tonight) and you might not get the answered ask notification

You’re my: absolute brainiac mutual!

How I met you: God I hate this question. I so very rarely remember these things. I think I saw a huge comment you left on someone’s post and not only agreed with what you said but loved how you articulated it, so I took a look at your horusporus blog after that

Why I follow you: I follow the maimakan one because which Malaysian doesn’t enjoy looking at copious photos of food, and I follow the horusporus one because I love your opinions and some of your tags are super funny in this kind of bo-chap (Hokkien for ‘don’t care’) way. I also just like you as a person!

Your blog is: A lot of good shit in the tags. Excellent opinions that I always make myself read even when I got no reading spoons. And just like with no-ipsum I sometimes wish you’d make more personal posts because you are an interesting person. Lots of SJ and politics reblogs I find super trustworthy, like you are one of the few people on here where I’d look at something you reblogged and go ‘ok if horusporus reblogged this in agreement there fucking has to be something to it’. Sometimes it’s funny to scroll through your horusporus blog because it’s like ‘intellectual stuff intellectual stuff socially-conscious stuff eh suddenly got one post of nothing but Zayn looking handsome. ok”

Your URL is: maimakan is a truly good-ass pun 10 gold stars. Horusporus is a very fun thing to say out loud. It reminds me of that photo of two people in Egyptian deity get-up drinking coffee together. Is Horus your favorite Egyptian god? Is there some emotional significance attached to Horus? Sorry if you’ve already talked about this I forget a lot of things these days

Your icon is: For maimakan it’s… french toast? Is it? Or a cut-up grilled cheese sandwich? Omg I’m really bad at this idk man. For horusporus it is no longer the very suspicious-looking default icon, it’s you as a Powerpuff girl… tbh it’s a bit disarming because Powerpuff icons are what I’d expect from a blog that rbs a lot of did-you-know posts and diet white feminist stuff, but you have claimed it from that crowd and made it cool……. congrats

A random fact I know about you: You seem to like all these old uncle types…. why la like that…………………. you also have some mondo psychic powers! I remember you saying your mom used to use you as kind of a magic 8 ball. It’s kind of cool.

General opinion: You, like pekorosu, have a really special place in my heart because you always layan my stupid sobby personal posts and one time you took the time to talk me out of this dumbass self-loathing funk I was going through… I will always remember that. Idk you seem like someone who has to like, not care about shit (not SJ stuff, talking about more ‘personal’ things) to protect their heart, like you’ve gone through a lot of sadness and loneliness and you gotta do a bunch of shit to keep it at bay. But the small stuff really counts for a lot to you and so it ends up sort of mattering anyway? That’s the feeling I get. It’s also always seemed like you got a lot inside of you that you don’t really feel safe trusting people with, and that you are sad sometimes because it feels like people don’t really see you. Sometimes I think about you and wonder if you’re doing ok. I think you’re an incredibly smart person and there are times when I read your longer comments on SJ and politics and my face turns into that gawpy Ted gif from Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure lol. It seems like you are so smart that your whole life you’ve been sien at the world for getting so much wrong. Another feeling I have is that what you think may not always be very kind but more often than not it’s just you being out of fucks to give instead of you being actively malicious. I think that you are fundamentally a kind person though, it’s a big part of why I like you so much

A random thought I have: Sometimes when I read your ‘correct’ tag I hear you saying it as ‘korek’…. is that how you say it

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rhodopsins · 7 years

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in those memories from the past (we were so beautiful)

sungyeol/myungsoo ; 2.1k

12:20 woohyunie: guess what fuckers 12:26 howonie: what 12:26 sungyeolie: no one cares 12:26 woohyunie: obviously you guys care 12:26 woohyunie: otherwise you wouldn’t have responded 12:26 woohyunie: lmao 12:26 howonie: ugh just spit it out alr lol 12:26 howonie: so we can all continue with our lives 12:27 sungyeolie: ur literally the most annoying person on this planet 12:27 woohyunie: thank you :) 12:27 woohyunie: i appreciate that 12:27 woohyunie: you know 12:27 woohyunie: i really do 12:27 woohyunie: it warms the cockles of my heart 12:27 woohyunie: anyway guess who got into snu 12:27 woohyunie: for business 12:27 woohyunie: that’s right it’s me 12:28 howonie: congrats 12:28 howonie: also what the fuck 12:28 howonie: is a cockle 12:28 sungyeolie: no one cares 12:28 sungyeolie: jk gj woohoo do u want a gold star 12:28 sungyeolie: oppa ur so cool!!!! 12:29 sungyeolie: wow namu!!!! gj!!!!!!!!! 12:29 woohyunie: shut the fuck up dooly 12:29 woohyunie: sunggyu-hyung is gonna marry me now 12:29 woohyunie: since i’ll be making bank 12:29 woohyunie: and i’ll be there for him forever 12:30 woohyunie: we are gonna have a house 12:30 woohyunie: with a white picket fence 12:30 woohyunie: and as many children as he can give me 12:30 howonie: ok u can stop now 12:30 howonie: like srsly its getting gross 12:30 howonie: dont think i dont see u doodling on ur notes 12:30 howonie: “nam sunggyu” ??? rly ??? 12:30 howonie: btw he would never take ur last name 12:31 woohyunie: but our kids will have my last name 12:31 woohyunie: and that’s all that matters :) 12:31 sungyeolie: ugh shut up lmao 12:31 woohyunie: don’t be salty :D

it’s been building up for a while. sungyeol knows that he really doesn’t have any right to be angry or upset or annoyed, even, about all of this. it’s just biology. it’s just nature. but he thinks that in a world where the majority of the population is comprised of betas, that he would have the luck to have friends that aren’t two of the most testosterone-driven alphas he’s ever had the misfortune of meeting in his entire life.

that’s not true, of course. he loves howon and woohyun, loves them like the older brothers he wishes he had instead of a younger brother whom he thinks might possibly hate him sometimes. but they just don’t understand.

they don’t understand what it could possibly be like to want someone he’s not ever supposed to be with. they don’t understand what it’s like to be sneered at whenever he walks myungsoo down to 2-b, to be stared at through the windows by the alphas in the classroom. you’re not supposed to be with him. because you’re a beta, their stares read. go find a cute beta girl who’ll make you happy and leave him for us. because we’re alphas.

but that’s the exact reason why he walks myungsoo down to his classroom like this— so he can duck his head down so that myungsoo will lean up to kiss him, and sungyeol knows that they know, that they’re watching as well. myungsoo would blush a fierce shade of red if he ever knew, but sungyeol’s desperate to keep myungsoo with him here, and he hopes that if he loves myungsoo enough, he won’t leave.

it’s what keeps him going through all of those overtime work shifts, all of those times where he could’ve just gone home and rested his head, all of those times where he’d stayed behind at the restaurant and helped clean up. it’s what keeps him busy, methodically and almost detachedly counting every single won he earns until he reaches the amount he needs for the camera— for myungsoo’s camera.

he hadn’t known cameras could cost so much until myungsoo had sat down next to him one day when they’d gone to the riverbank together, until myungsoo had leaned his head against sungyeol’s shoulder and sighed, heavily, that sunggyu had spilled all of their parents’ soju on his camera. the memory card was safe, myungsoo had said, but the camera was ruined. how will i take pictures of you now? myungsoo had asked, turning to face sungyeol and taking sungyeol’s face in his hands, turning it this way and that. ah, it’s really too bad. sunggyu-hyung owes me big.

he’d gone home that night and searched up the brands of cameras he knew myungsoo used, and his eyes had popped when he saw the price tags listed under each one. it had been amazing to him how calm myungsoo was about the entire thing, but myungsoo had told him later that that camera was old, and he’d wanted an excuse to get a new one anyway.

it’s what had made him swallow his pride and ask howon and woohyun how to make an omega feel good on their first time. they'd stared at him for what had felt like hours before bursting into loud and raucous laughter, and when sungyeol hadn’t laughed along with them, when sungyeol had only stared back at them with his eyes unwaveringly level, they stopped. get on your knees, sungyeol, this is a student-teacher relationship now, woohyun had ordered, and sungyeol had complied almost immediately.

wow, he’s serious about this, howon had said, surprise evident in his voice, and sungyeol had been. he still is. he isn’t serious about many things, but if there’s one thing, one person, he’s willing to put on a brave front for, it’s myungsoo. he’d only seen myungsoo in passing before, seen him in quick glimpses in sungjong’s bedroom or passing through the hallways at school, but myungsoo was cute and sungyeol wanted him.

it had been on their first anniversary that sungyeol had turned to myungsoo and asked if he wanted to. myungsoo had looked up at him, his eyes shaking, and whispered that i’ve never— i’ve never done this before, and sungyeol had leaned down to kiss myungsoo on his forehead and say, quietly, that i haven’t either. he’d laid myungsoo out over on his bed on a night when his parents were out and sungjong was at a friend’s place and he’d kissed down the line of myungsoo’s jaw and down the column of his throat and nipped softly at the juncture of his neck and his shoulders.

is this okay? sungyeol had asked so many times, just to make sure that myungsoo was feeling alright, that myungsoo was comfortable, because none of it would’ve mattered at all if myungsoo didn’t feel good. myungsoo had nodded, wordless, and he’d clutched sungyeol closer to him and said that i want you now, sungyeol-hyung. he’d stared at sungyeol like he hadn’t ever seen anyone else naked before, which he probably hadn’t, and he’d stared down at sungyeol’s length and swallowed, his throat bobbing.

myungsoo had been wet, so slick between his thighs, when sungyeol had lifted his hips to take off his underwear. don’t look at me, it’s embarrassing, myungsoo had mumbled, turning his face to the side, and sungyeol had seen the splotches of red forming all over his chest and his neck and he’d thought that myungsoo was beautiful in his daily life, but he was the most beautiful when he was spread out for sungyeol like this, where sungyeol was the only one to see him so open and pliant and willing.

he’d taken his time with myungsoo, scissoring him open with his fingers wet with lube until myungsoo was writhing around and pushing his hips back against sungyeol’s fingers and saying, low and desperate, please, sungyeol, i want you— i need you. sungyeol had pushed into him, a long and slow thrust of his hips, and when he’d been fully seated inside myungsoo, he’d buried his face against myungsoo’s shoulder to catch his breath, and he’d known by the way myungsoo’s eyes were closed and the way his breath came out in quick huffs, that he was doing the same.

myungsoo had felt so amazing around him, and sungyeol had stared down at how he’d looked up at sungyeol with only the fondest expressions on his face, and he’d wondered how it was possible for his chest to feel so suddenly full and overwhelming with a feeling he hadn’t known if he was ready to name yet. he’d jerked myungsoo off until he came, spilling white all over his own stomach, and after he’d cleaned myungsoo off, he’d pulled myungsoo to him, his legs intertwining with myungsoo’s and he’d tucked myungsoo’s head underneath his chin and he’d linked their fingers together and he’d said let’s sleep now.

it’s what makes him look over at myungsoo whenever he’s not doing anything at all, whenever myungsoo’s staring at the wall and thinking of what next to write in his paper, whenever myungsoo’s biting his lip and wondering what to eat for dinner. if he really loved myungsoo, he would tell him that he would be exponentially more beautiful if he switched out his thick framed glasses for contact lenses, if he straightened his hair from the wild curly mess that it always was.

it’s really just a fact of life that people who are more beautiful are going to be more liked, and that’s why sungyeol keeps those thoughts to himself. it’s selfish and mean, but he wants to keep myungsoo for himself, wants for myungsoo to never take off his glasses for anyone else, wants for myungsoo to never straighten his hair, so that he’ll be the only one who’s ever had myungsoo in front of him and begging for him with an almost inhuman desperation.

but he also knows that since he loves myungsoo, he should do what’s best for him. he’ll never be able to give myungsoo the kids that he loves so much, he’ll never be able to love myungsoo the way an alpha would, but more than that, more than anything else, he’s keeping myungsoo for himself. he’s keeping myungsoo for himself and selfishly away from someone who could give him the kids he wants. he’s seen myungsoo watching the kids at the playground. the moms all know him by name, know him as the younger kim boy who wants to teach elementary school some day, who loves their kids almost as much as they do.

he watches myungsoo with the kids, and he wonders to himself what kind of monster would do this to myungsoo. what kind of monster would keep myungsoo so stubbornly locked in with himself, what kind of monster would keep myungsoo from finding real happiness, what kind of monster would keep myungsoo from an alpha. they’re so cute, myungsoo rambles on and on and on, his right hand in sungyeol’s left as they walk back from the playground. he sighs, almost dreamily, i want.

sungyeol can never give myungsoo this. he can give myungsoo as many false promises as he wants to, he can give myungsoo as many cameras and origami paper stars and stuffed animals as he wants, he can give myungsoo as many nights with his hips up on sungyeol’s thighs, with his face pressed into the pillow, with his legs hooked over sungyeol’s shoulders, as he wants, but he can never give myungsoo this.

he can never give myungsoo what woohyun can give sunggyu, what howon can give sungjong, and he hates them for it, in a completely unjustifiable and mean and hateful way, but above all, he hates himself for it the most. so he tells himself that it’s for myungsoo’s own good when he goes to myungsoo’s house that night, and when he walks away, he pretends that he doesn’t see, doesn’t hear, doesn’t know that myungsoo is crying behind him. he clenches his fists, stuffs them into his pockets, and walks home, ignoring the way that the tears that fall from his own eyes are hot and uncomfortable.

it’s better this way, he tells himself until he starts to believe it. it’ll be better this way for the both of them.

21:39 woohyunie: uh dude what the fuck 21:39 woohyunie: literally what the fuck happened 21:39 woohyunie: sunggyu-hyung is screaming at me 21:39 woohyunie: and none of it is my fault? 21:39 woohyunie: what the fuck did you do man 21:40 howonie: wait what 21:40 howonie: whats happening 21:40 howonie: what??? 21:40 woohyunie: dude they broke up 21:41 howonie: who????? 21:41 woohyunie: are you stupid????? 21:41 howonie: ur lying 21:41 woohyunie: i’m not 21:41 woohyunie: lee fucking sungyeol 21:41 woohyunie: explain 21:41 woohyunie: i’m coming to your house 21:41 woohyunie: so you better get ready to explain 21:42 howonie: holy fuck 21:42 woohyunie: you have five seconds to explain 21:42 woohyunie: or i’m coming over 21:42 woohyunie: alright you fucker i’m coming over 21:53 woohyunie: open the fuck up me and howon are outside 21:53 woohyunie: lee sungyeol i swear to god 21:53 woohyunie: open up 21:53 woohyunie: now

#kktau #yeolsoo

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