#c: you will haunt me

[dreadark]

that ivan loves till is the most obvious thing about them

but. does ivan know that…?

the ivan that regards his own feelings as shallow, the ivan that learned how emotions are expressed only from copying others… does he even know that the love he’s felt for so long is love? probably not. and part of the reason is the one he loves himself

because the easiest example he has of love is till's feelings to mizi. till outright calls it love, and ivan watches him so much he has to be aware of this and till’s love to mizi is totally unselfish, right. he doesn’t seem to actually want much from her—just that she's still there and still "mizi"

but ivan can't be satisfied with just watching he… wants. ivan wants till’s attention, till’s affection—

surely this selfish wanting can’t be love

...no wonder he was never able to express his feelings straightforwardly when he belittles them so much but he can’t stand not having anything either, so he does… whatever he does instead to get any scraps of attention he can, from someone he's convinced doesn't care about him at all only showing affection when till can't see it, right until he knows he's going to die

but ivan's feelings for till are all he still has of himself... to think of them as shallow...

I've seen this translated as "I should've been kinder" to him (till) or to her (sua)

but really, the one he should've been kinder to was himself

#alien stage #alnst #alnst ivan #ivantill #i have a lot of thoughts on till -> mizi too but this is long enough #just attempting to rewrite my twt rambles more coherently #idk why i wrote this so dramatically tho... #'thank you for being the victim of my shallow emotions' is going to haunt me to my grave #ivan's character is just a careful balance between his natural freak nature and his extreme depths of self-loathing #making him the most miserable guy ever #...really once you realize so much of what went wrong is thanks to ivan just hating himself too much to even think of them as friends. well #c...can we bring him back... don't die like this..... #(also you know. with the implications of how 'pets' are treated #wanting someone physically must feel... even more wrong

[skitskatdacat63]

Please take my low effort shitpost of our two Aston flopboys

Basically:

#credits to c for the 'ill bite you' #truly my magnum opus what can i say #idk i wanna draw something legit for the 'you threw me to the lions' quote #but like this idea haunted me LMAO #just because it is truly vettonso weekend *for me*(and all the other dedicated vettonso lovers) #im not too legitimately upset abt nando bcs im pretty happy for osc but like also his radios made me SADDDDDDD #this was the first time he really sounded legit upset and flustered :( #AND HE DIDNT GET THE KISS TROPHY UGHHHHHHH #so as c and i were talking about: seb is his kissy trophy 🥰 #god i really hope you dont mind all the vettonso posting this wknd dhjfkg its a lot of fun for me! #also i hate that i have the compulsion to listen to early 2010s hits whenever i draw vettonso LMAO #gets me into thr mood yknow #fernando should listen to firework by katy perry i think it could fix him #2023 japanese gp #vettonso #sebastian vettel #fernando alonso #f1 fanart #catie.art.

[aroanthy]

the symbolism of revolutionary girl utena is key to understanding what it’s even trying to say narratively and thematically. if you remove the symbolism, if you remove the ways in which the narrative obfuscates itself and abstracts what it’s saying, then what it is saying changes dramatically. if rgu was like ‘yeah lol and did you guys know that incest is bad’ or ‘maybe gay people are good’ or ‘hey did you know that csa victims are Real and Alive and Have Interiority’— like those are all paraphrases of things that it says, but the way that it chooses to say them is so powerful and conveys so much nuance and complexity that those simplistic statements don’t. it provides an incredibly meaningful commentary on the way that systemic violence and abuse are covered up, codified, made part of our culture that supposedly resents those things. it’s examination of incest, the incest taboo and how that impacts incest victims— it’s all so incredibly considered and layered because the show chooses to convey what it’s saying through symbolism, through its metatheatrical framing, through allegory. it retains the reality of these issues; it shows them to us only when we’ve already bought into the system’s lies to make a point about how that operates, how that works to make us all complicit in that violence. nanami. nanami.

dont even get me started on how the movie uses its symbolism to demonstrate how the abuse anthy and touga experienced is simultaneously built into the world and culture they exist in, and always obfuscated and abstracted for the sake of their abusers (also specifically the way that it engenders shame and prevents people from seeking help. rgu is so damn good at understanding how and why people don’t ‘do what they should’ in abusive situations: the systems in place don’t fucking work bc they are an extension of the system built upon that abuse). anthy is the model in all the paintings, the symbol of so many undesirable things, the canvas on which they are painted. her likeness is used as an approximation for all of these awful things, many of which are a part of her in a way, but such that her interiority, her feelings, are never regarded, never seen, never understood. she’s the model. akio is never explicitly named as her painter.

#messy post once again just dumping thoughts #obfuscation abventures #< literally my thesis on the show. it would be peanuts to me without its layers of visual complexity its symbolism and allegory #its bonkers filmmaking. i mean my god editing rgu amvs gives you a greater appreciation for how they edited that show and MAN #the transfeminism hole video essay haunts me always. aou is anthy’s body!!!!!!!!!! the use of the static…. #the way that rgu uses looping and repeating shots and abrupt cuts (same w music) the pace it continually disrupts with its editing #its sooooo….. gahhh. ep 33. head in hands #rgu i love you rgu im sorry people would suggest you’d be better if you were more normal and conventional #this is why utena is a freaks only show. you have to go apeshit about the implications of shadow girl relationships to get it #didn’t even mention c-ko on this post like that SAYS something #dais.txt

[martyrbat]

ghosts - batman: haunted knight

[ID: A multi panel sequence of Bruce Wayne as a child on Halloween. He's dressed up in a Mask of Zorro costume and is excitedly running down the stairs while holding two swords, calling out for his mother happily. He tells her that he's ready to go trick or treating. Martha Wayne has her hand on his shoulder and is smiling as she tells him, “your costume looks great!” Bruce replies, “Thanks, I made it myself. Alfred sorta helped. Is dad home yet?” Martha draws her hand back hesitantly and says his name. Bruce already knows that that means there's bad news. He tells her, “don't tell me,” before she continues and says his father called. Bruce has his head down, angrily finishing her sentence, “he's gotta work late!” He looks out the window as if his father will appear and says, “It's not fair! He promised he would take me trick or treating!” Martha soothes that she knows as Bruce repeats, “he promised,” to himself disappointedly. She tells him, “But there was an emergency,” which makes Bruce snap, “There's always some emergency!”

Bruce continues to stand in front of the window as Martha looks at him. Bruce announces, “I'm gonna wait for him. Even if it takes all night!” as he tensely clenches the handle of his sword. Martha reaches out for him sadly and suggests, “Bruce, I could take you out myself. Or, we can call some of the other children at school and go out with them.” Bruce, as an adult, somberly says off panel that, “she doesn't know...” as his kid self stares out the window still. His hat casting a small shadow on his face as he tells her, “There are no other kids to call. I have no friends at school.” Martha says his name again but doesn't know how to comfort him. Instead, she just silently places a hand on his shoulder. We see a silhouette from far away of her standing next to him as Bruce waits for his father to eventually come home. END ID]

#hey do you ever think about bruce's childhood and feel your chest hurt #like even before the murders. just how lonely he was a boy and how that loneliness only grew after watching his entire life and people he #had be ripped away from him. sure he had alfred but his entire life and world was contained to that big scary house that was suddenly so #much emptier. the constant reminders and seeing what was once there and triggering it again and again and again ontop of ptsd and ocd... #also martha?? love her. hes the biggest mama's boy you cant change my mind. #<- again using this tag because if thomas worked a lot and bruce obviously didn't have friends to go out with #then the only person he ever actually talked to and interacted with was his mother and alfred #the man hired to care about you and the woman who gave birth to you. thus that attachment being stronger #but also the 'people have to be trapped to want to be around me'... a man hired to be your friend and take care of you... #ur own parents not wanting to/avoiding that responsibility and involvement.... yeah. #anyways ! happy halloween !! heres a child being disappointed ! #bruce wayne #baby brucie #crypt's panels #c: batman: haunted knight | ghosts #martha wayne #bruce & martha #bruce's childhood

[flamebloom]

V.I.P

#flameart #nilfruits #bakui #Hi Φ CLUB #hi fi club #I love this song so m u c h I just keep watching it on repeat #I am rotating Nine in my mind like a rotisserie chicken #I have drawn them three times now but this is the only one to escape so far... #so far..... #thank you nilfruits and bakui for these creatures they haunt me beautifully

[laurabenanti]

@usergif 1 year celebration: shuffle challenge ↳ day 2: blending | font pairing | otp

insp.

#*creative #alexdanversedit #astrainzeedit #generaldanversedit #💛 #c*elb #supergirledit #tvedit #dcedit #astra in ze #alex danvers #supergirl #television #singinprincess #usermartian #usergif1year #also jfc i finally made something for what has haunted me for the last.. 4 months #general danvers #⭐️tp: i like you #c*

[savrenim]

so I know I talk a lot about 'mathematician Gojo' but has anyone considered how fucking HILARIOUS 'mathematician Suguru' would actually be

ID under cut:

in the Project Runway 'Blood Orange' meme format:

Panel 1: screenshot from the show Jujutsu Kaisen, in which character Gojo Satoru says, "I get what you call a negative natural number"

Panels 2-4: Geto Suguru, reacting as if in a confessional, "'Negative natural number', he's so pretentious. Shut up, it's a fucking integer. 'Negative natural number'."

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #gojo satoru #geto suguru #mathematics #meme science #I'd say this is a...... #stage four meme #for my meme tagging system #anyways this has been haunting me for like. two weeks. #au in which suguru is a mathematician he becomes a curse user after like a year bc #(a) mathematicians are Like That #(b) if you really wanted to give him the same motivation he could have run the statistics for shaman life expectancy #but (c) he had to put up with Gojo's Very Incorrect Teenage Math for a full year and then just. snapped.

[andy-clutterbuck]

#excuse me but The Nose™ #Andrew Lincoln #* #andygifs #can you make one of these at Build A Bear? #his face is so soothing #me being obsessed with a man's hands? must be a day that ends in y #profile that'd make renaissance sculptors green with envy #Michelangelo gonna just throw David in the river and give up #then come haunt me for saying that #excuse me sir please put your forearms away thank you #n e c k #also his arm hair but i'm not gonna be that weird right now

[dramarants]

i only want love triangles if it's whatever fucked up polygon junmo kicheol and euijeong have going on

#the worst of evil #ranting #idk how to articulate how juicy it is #junmo's fierce protectiveness of his wife - he trusts her but can't help his jealousy fear or frustration while trapped in the situation #euijeong hurting but putting her own life on the line worried for her husband while unpacking the memories of her first love #she can't help but sympathize with kicheol and what he's endured; haven't seen much of how she feels rn but it must be c o n f l i c t e d #(not necessarily even in a romantic way but wanting to root for a person chasing their goals who was once so important to you) #(all while grieving her mother without the support of her literal goddamn spouse by her side) #and kicheol. also grieving and trying to establish a place for himself and his crew yet drawn to junmo despite the red flags #his panic and desperation when jungmo bled out on him which must have triggered his own memories of losing taeho #junmo who has every reason to despise kicheol barely concealing his general rage but protects him like it's second nature at every turn #all while conflicted as a bystander to atrocities (and now willfully leaving another cop to die to protect himself his wife and the mission #getting mentally and physically pummeled left and right just bc his superiors demand it from him #all to please euijeong's family by using the promotions to prove himself and get rid of the stigma weighing him down #like !!! #and haven't even touched on kicheol wooing euijeong against his buddy's wishes and in such a pure heart fluttering way #accepting the risk for a second chance to bathe in the bright light she used to shine on his life #OMG AND BIBI'S ENTRANCE!! junmo realizing her interest gives him leverage and agency but struggling to use it to his advantage #it's soooo messy and i'm obsessed #that funeral arc is gonna haunt me for years #as is the tension during the pat down which def was supposed to be like a gang pride/dignity/lack of power against the jp folks thing #also testing their relationship and responsibilites as leader subordinate #but felt charged around whether kicheol would protest or junmo would accept the manhandling in totally different 👀 ways #goddamn i wrote an essay and this doesn't even scratch the surface of the meat of the show #tldr; i have many many feelings and for once the 'love triangle' isn't making me gauge out my own eyeballs #it's about power it's about raising the stakes and revealing things about the characters w/o dominating the plot

[ms-scarletwings]

I know they say to be the change you want to see in the world but I sure got some work to do and then some if that’s the case

#edmund mcmillen #khs #David firth #kitty horrorshow #indie games #indie animation #my memes #cries in ‘loving a famous artist for something other than the specific work that blew them up’ #anatomy fans will populate a site with endless outpourings of how much they love hostile scenery and being eaten by the setting itself #and then say nothing about haunted cities vol 4 #NO ONE TALKS ABOUT DOG OF MAN???? #OR MUSIC MOUTH OR NOT STANLEY HERE?!??? #scarlet rambles about things #DO YOU EVEN KNOW THE FETAL DUMPLING LORE #OR THE TRAGEDY OF THE TRI ARACHNIDS #OR C O I L 😭 #lol #grain of salt #let me be silly #ofc I love the mentioned works as well

[charmwasjess]

one of my favorite things about writing Sifo-Dyas is realizing that I don't need to compromise any of his canon shit. Oh, okay, you're so routinely debilitated by visions that you mostly take archeological missions with your weird bad mom former Master because you might pass out and trip balls to the plot of Revenge of the Sith at any moment and that can be a real liability in the field?

...Except for all the times when you apparently have a Masters degree in the Underworld and take weird secret missions about it, go off solo into active conflict zones assignments, and the Supreme Chancellor has your direct personal line? When you're not serving on the Jedi Council?

Go off, king, if you don't see a contradiction between all those things, I don't either.

#this post brought to you by the fact that I wrote Sifo a stupid underworld alias and accidentally made him too hot :c #now I can't think of anything else #“obsessed with my blorbo's oc” is a new low even by my cringe standards #but you guys #he's so hot #stupid sexy fake bounty hunter sifo-dyas haunting me with his homoerotic leather pants #sifo-dyas

[cocksley-and-catapult]

Thinking about that one time you gave cocksley titties (like 500 issues ago. He’s gotten top surgery since then)

#c&c asks #one of you reminds me every four months like youre trying to haunt me

[skitskatdacat63]

Hey do you remember all those videos of Fernando smelling flowers? Haha yeah....

#posting this both while im asleep and after whatever bee event ends up happening #so who knows what will happen! will we get nothing? will we get eye contact? will we possibly get an interaction? its a surprise!! #anyways this is basically me hearing about seb's bee event and he said the drivers will be there #me deep in my vettonso brainrot: OH MY GOD THEY'RE GONNA BE IN THE SAME VICINITY #will be so funny for me if when i wake up i find out fernando didnt even go 😭 #but we remain hopeful 🙏 #also this is just very funny to me bcs like both seb and fernando have very specifc quirks #and what are two of their specific quirks? seb and his bee thing. fernando and his flower thing from this season #so this fanart is perfect y'know 🥰🥰🥰 #also screeching over how this is the first canon au drawing ive ever drawn. ive literally never drawn non-au until now 💀💀💀 #okay and now some horrible jokes thay happened during the process of this: #thesis of this drawing: whats Fernando gonna do? Pollinate him? 😏 #C. why did you have to make me think of bees that produce sex pollen 😭😭 this is gonna haunt me forever. but also vettonso post-japan fic- #and then also the barry benson thing. im like what do humanized bees look like and then realized 'oh no....oh no.' #fernando to seb at the bee event: 'ya like samurais...?' SORRY 😭 #also having to pick the colors from one of my historical au drawings was haunting. just the sheer difference btwn them yknow...... #anyways please take my old men yaoi. took a break from historical yaoi to draw this 😭😭😭😭 #this is my peak vettonso fanart cannot improve from here. also a fever dream #vettonso #f1 #formula 1 #sebastian vettel #fernando alonso #catie.art. #*not gonna edit the tags bcs i like the time capsule of it all but like. yeah. we were fed. #*catie from 2 hours prior(atm its 3 am) would be so pleased right now i think

[briannabrackens]

who: @benblackwood / (brandon blackwood, first blackwood lord of raventree hall) age: the age of heroes - following the exile of house blackwood from the wolfswood. roughly five hundred to a thousand years before the coming of the andals. this is a past life thread, based on notions of reincarnation. where: hunting woods on the outskirts of the village of blackbuckle. what: a seventeen year old princess briar bracken of the red fork meets the talk of all the land of rivers - the blackwoods of the north.

the cold came in waves, the beams of sunlight breaking through the darkness of the trees basking in nothing but deceit and falsehood - for despite the rays that illuminated her path and her surroundings, they did nothing to protect from the biting chill of the wind. the sounds of the forest were alive and quiet all at the very once, the momentary snapping of a twig beneath the pressure of her leather sole and the subsequent scuttle of an animal scarpering for freedom. for it's very life, as it would have had to do it's whole entire life being raised amongst these towering trees.

they conditioned to run at the slightest of sounds, living a life on the brink of instinct and survival: were they very much that different from humans then?

perhaps that had always been the intention of the gods; to fill each of their creation with spirits that were akin, and continued to watch over them by being present within each and every thing. the sound of the wind and the rustling were the safest of all sounds she could have wished for.

she should have been hunting, and hunting she had done; her arrow had been washed from the blood of large pheasants, tied onto the back of her faithful horse; there was none accompanying the princess, who had recently turned seven and ten - for it were customs that within the lands of the red fork, one's first hunt needed to be done entirely alone. without involvement. and so, some of her closest guards remain at the mouth of the dense forest: and it was there they had been ordered to remain. pheasants were not what she had been tasked with, and whilst she had used their blood to mark upon the trees in gratitude to the gods for her bounty, there was something greater she wished to draw the string of her bow on.

a great stag found within these valleys, majestic; whose head would be within the great hall of stone hedge to commemorate her first hunt.

she took to slipping from the her horse, where she had always rode astride; holding the reins wrapped around her hand, which grew pink with the cold. a a line of house bracken's early origins were in horse breeding, specifically horses for battle: it was where they had dabbled, and when their lines had crossed with the royal line, it were as though those of stone hedge were able to temper the most wild of spirits.

and it was in a clearing where she spotted them through the darkness of the hedge; not merely a stag, but a doe and fawn too. the sight made her pause in her tracks, dark, thick brows furrowing together in momentary confusion; for she had never seen a stag remain with his family so. she hated how she saw her own eyes each time she looked upon them, and whilst she continued to silently step forward and avoid all twigs, her string drawing and her arrow aimed, she found herself hesitating again upon seeing the fawns drink the milk from their mother. did the love of a mother cross all boundaries too?

it was then she turned, and suddenly found another figure beside her; in a dark cloak, with slight curls as red as fire coming from underneath the way his hood was pulled to protect him from the cold. her own thick hair had been pulled into a side plait, her hood falling from her head only moments before. there was clear surprise in her facial expression, but upon glancing over him, she noted he too was hunting. and was looking toward the very same clearing. something in her seemingly shifted, violently, and she impulsively stepped on a twig, alerting the sound to the deer. something in her could not be the death of this scene: and she did not want another to be either.

"tá i bhfad níos mó sna coillte seo. ní gá dúinn a leithéid a dhéanamh chun na neamhchiontachta chomh soiléir sin. le do thoil." (there are far more in these woods. we need not do such a thing to innocence so clear.) her words, were seemingly ignored: for he sent an arrow forwards anyway as the deer began to make their retreat, and she heard one of them let out a cry and fall. her face changed entirely. had he ignored her, so openly? "an bhfuil tú bodhar, a dhuine phóg trí thine?" (do you not hear me? i say, where is your mercy?)

he did not understand her. it were obvious by the way he looked at her, his hand gesture making it clear he did not understand what it was she was trying to say to him. and slowly but surely her mind seemingly spun as the pieces all fell into perfect place; there is only one who would not yet know the language they had spoken for thousands of years. "blackwood." she asked, her voice half hesitant but still it sounded more of a statement than a question; he seemed not a monster. he seemed another hunter in these lands. but what could he and his family have done to be banished from the north? she would need to speak the common tongue. "that is you, yes?"

#c: brandon #brandon 001 #you said i killed you. haunt me then. (brandon&briar) #you're in the wind i'm in the water nobody's son nobody's daughter (brandon&briar) #but i'm in the trees i'm in the breeze you'll see my face in every place ; but you can't catch me now (brandon&briar) #whew this got long because so much lore to set up

[martyrbat]

choices - batman: haunted knight

[ID: a black and white panel of Bruce Wayne talking to Alfred Pennyworth. They're both dressed in suits and Bruce hesitantly considers, "Maybe... I don't have to work tonight..." and Alfred responds, "If the choice is between parading about the city in your Long John's or getting a good night rest-". The second photo is a blue thought box. Bruce thinks, "I don't have a choice... Crime never sleeps." The third photo is black and white again and has Bruce's silhouette in the open doorway that leads to the Batcave. The light behind Bruce is pure white and it looks like Bruce has a robe on. Alfred is in an overlaying panel and looks at him with disapproval. He sarcastically comments, "Oh, good show, Sir. For a moment, I was afraid you'd have a rational thought." END ID]

#yes i know its titled fears in the collected version and yes i dont care. choices is a better title. bite me. #babygirl you have executive dysfunction <33 #<- apparently a tag i already had but #reminder bruce wayne is a man with ocd and canonly speculated to be autistic and has to have a caregiver #even with alfred dead he has other people constantly telling him to come to bed. to go get something to eat. to not neglect the necessities #bruce wayne #crypt's panels #alfred pennyworth #c: batman: haunted knight | choices

[pyrriax]

if i see the words "split personality" one more time i think i will explode.

#haunted ecosystem #genuinely i cannot fucking stand it #this is about that one c!owen headcanon i cannot fucking stand it okay. stop headcanoning villains with villainized disorders if it's just #so that you can do a roundabout retcon i honestly just. cannot. #okay normally i do not get upset on tumblr but i needed to just. get that out of my system. #tumblr recommended me a bad take post im going to carry on being normal now #i just dont like that specific take because it is just actually vile to me. i would take a literal possession headcanon of that. #remind me to delete this later