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thekitsunesiren · 1 year

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mind if I give a dp×dc prompt?

Constantine means to summon the ghost king but instead summons the ghost prince who is currently has a fork hanging out of his mouth.

Damian just wanted to eat lunch with his adoptive father king phantom, in peace.

I just want to put that I love this prompt, and will enjoy writing this so much!

Now, onto the big question: How did Damian become the Ghost Prince of the Infinite Realms in the first place?

And of course, the answer is obviously because of Ra's al Ghul. I could think of it as two ways.

One would be Ra's summoned the Ghost King and offered his son in exchange for immortality. Danny not only denies him, but still takes Damian with him because he's obviously better off anywhere but there.

The other way would be Damian would be forced to watch the summoning as Ra's possibly wanted to show him his ascent into being immortal. Though, when summoning Danny, he just looked around, saw Damian, grabbed him, and disappeared back through the summoning circle while flipping off Ra's al Ghul.

Now, what's the Ghost King supposed to do with the human kid he just kidnapped without a second thought?

Sure, the kids previous living conditions probably wasn't the best. I mean, how would it when the man had an entire pit of rotten ectoplasm? But Danny was pretty much still a kid himself. And he had his kingly duties on top of that. But that doesn't mean he was just going to dump the kid somewhere else and hope for the best.

So what does Danny do? He goes to his sister.

Jazz is conflicted about the whole ordeal. On one hand, it was good for Danny to rescue the child from the possible dangerous situation. On the other, they had a whole child that they didn't know what to do with.

Damian was confused about the entire situation. He was there with his grandfather (whether by force or his own accord depending how he got there) to watch him summon the King of the Dead in order to establish himself as one of the higher beings in this world to rule it. Instead, the King, who turned out to be no more older than him, denied his grandfather upright before grabbing him and vanishing back into the same portal he was summoned from.

Now, he was sitting between the Ghost King and an older teen. Sister, maybe? Either way, he was unsure as to what to do now. He had no idea how far he was away from the hideout of the League. And if the King was as powerful as legends told, he doubted he would make it far if he were to run anywhere before he was caught.

So, Damian believed that the best thing to do in this situation was to try and get onto the Ghost King's good side until he could find what would be the next step. So his next words shocked both him and the woman he was talking with.

"I want to stay with you, Great King of the Dead."

So! Damian decided that staying with the Ghost King, or Phantom, as he preferred to be called at most, would be best. Of course, his request threw the king off guard along with the girl. But it was all he had up his sleeve and he was going to use it.

And now that that was settled, a lot of things followed suite:

Danny, with the gain of a new charge, called in Sam and Tucker for a full on meeting on what to do with the kid along with Jazz.

Of course with Danny officially kidnapping him, he was under Danny's care. The Ghost King's care. That was basically signing some sort of second death wish.

With all of his friends and family being alive, they decide the best place for him to leave was in his castle in the Ghost Zone. There was plenty of room there! And he was sure that it would be safe. Maybe. Hopefully. You know what? He'll probably have to do a quick check before he officially brought to the castle.

That being said, he would also have to warn those who stayed in the castle the arrival of his....guest? Kidnappee? Ward? A kid that he took from the environment that was not safe for him!

Surprisingly, the ghosts were excited about the development. So excited, in fact, that when he returned to the castle with Damian in turn, there was already talk about the Ghost King's heir was already going around of all the realms. That was fine though. If the word spread around fast enough, hopefully that that meant he would be easily protected against any possible attacks.

Danny introduces to some of those he can. A few members of his Rogue Gallery who he gotten closer to over the time, Ellie ("It's big sister Ellie, now! I can't believe you just kidnapped a kid like that!")

Others were introduced to him as well. Especially Frost Bite and Fright Knight. Both of which were interested in meeting his sudden charge. (But with the way he saw the kid eyeing Fright Knight's sword, it's best their unsupervised interactions were kept to a minimum.)

And seeing that he was a kid himself, it was going to be weird raising one that's probably not much younger than him. Clockwork sure did get a kick out of it though.

Here is a list of possible outcomes that come from Danny and his friends & family raising Damian:

He doesn't grow up to be as stiff and cold as before. With Danny and the others around (especially Jazz's "Aunt Jazz, Damian," Aunt Jazz's mandatory sessions about his life with the League of Assassin's) his formality is more royalty like instead of an assassin waiting to strike. Though, there is a bit still there.

Training. As being accepted as the ward and possible heir of the Ghost King, it meant that that Damian would have protection and would have to learn the ways of the Infinite Realms. Both its politics and ways of combat. That was fine, Damian was sure he could handle it. He was raised by the League of Assassins after all. But he was wrong...so wrong. His first training session showed how he fared as a human against a ghost. But he wasn't deterred and continued fighting. (It was alright in the end, because he got his own ghost sword. Of course, it didn't send the opponent into a realm of neverending nightmares, but it was still good. Danny was sure he heard Damian cackle madly when the sword was presented to him.)

Bonding time with Danny and his friends. He would most likely learn about Danny about how he became Phantom and King of the Infinite Realms, as well as a bit of his friends and family that was with him the entire time.

Even if he is Danny's ward, that doesn't mean that he keeps him in the Infinite Realms the entire time. He often took Damian out to various spots that he deemed alright for some bonding between the two to get to know each other a bit more personally.

He would even allow Damian some time alone in the human realm if he wanted it. Of course, he would only leave him for about an hour or two before picking him up again. During that time he would simply work on some kingly duties he couldn't do with Damian around.

Overtime, Damian would become more liminal than most due to all the exposure in the realms. Of course he wasn't a full on ghost, but the most he could do was float, fly and even turn invisible. But even that would take a lot out of him for too long.

After a while, Damian would be referred as "Little Prince" or "Prince of the Infinite Realms".

All. The. Animals. With all of the ecto-based animals along with the blob ghosts, he would be in absolute heaven.

Now, I want to bring something else up to this prompt: How would Bruce react?

Depending on how Danny kidnapped adopted Damian, there are two ways that Bruce could find out.

Bruce gains word from Talia after a League of Assassins member finds her and tells her of the passing of Ra's al Ghul and the kidnapping of his grandson. Both of which happened by the hands of the Ghost King.

Words gets out that Ra's failed to get the Ghost King under his control to grant his wish of immortality and that the Ghost King took his grandson as well.

Either way would be how Bruce managed to have a biological son that he was unaware of. Which could also lead to him digging into anything he could find about the King of the Infinite Realms, even seeking JL Dark for any information. Of course, their information isn't up to date and he think that Damian has been kidnapped by the cruel Ghost King Pariah Dark instead of Danny Phantom: The King who can't say no to a kid with a sword bigger than his own body.

So yes. This whole ordeal would just be chaos from beginning to end.

#ghost king danny #dp #dpxdc #dp x dc prompt #dp x dc crossover #danny phantom crossover #dp x dc #dc x dp #dp crossover #dcxdp #Kitsune Kounters

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mortiferumsomnum · 2 years

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Jason Todd’s Cooking: Ghost King Approved!

A continuation to THIS post!! EDIT: MASTERLIST

Jason wanted to punch Danny.

Don’t get him wrong! The kid’s a delight to be with! He’s compassionate, sassy, and a huge nerd on anything related to space. The daily hugs the kid had been giving him had also been curing him of his Lazarus Madness, allowing Jason to sleep at night without any bloodthirsty thoughts to ruin his night... morning... whatever.

But when you have dozens of ghosts lined up at your door at ass-o’clock in the morning, whispering of how they wanted to have a taste of your “Cooking the Ghost King Approves”, even you would want to punch the ghost-kid’s face. It didn’t matter if his coronation to Official King-hood is tomorrow.

He also looks like the Demon Brat, so his punchable-looking face enhanced!

They haven’t seen Jason yet, who was hiding behind some building and was still in his Red Hood gear. How did these ghosts even find out where his civilian self lived----- Dannyyyyyyyy. Of course these ghosts would keep tabs of where their Beloved Ghost King was frequenting. Fuck. He needs to get out of here.

How are these ghosts even going to eat Jason’s food anyways?! Can they?! He thought Danny was the only ghostly being capable of stomaching food from the living realm!!!

The ghosts looked really weird too. Unlike Danny, who looked a bit more alive what with his skin color becoming like Damian’s when in his Ghost Form, these ghosts are either blue or green. Some had human forms, others looked like blobs.

Jason furrowed his brows under his mask. How the fuck is he even able to see these ghosts?! The only ghost he’s only able to see was Danny for these past few days! Did being with the Ghost King... enhance his ability to see ghosts?! Or were these ghosts just powerful enough to keep a form?

So many questions!! Tim and Bernard would have a field day trying to investigate this. He could already imagine all the whiteboard markers and whiteboards the two were going to invest in, throwing idea, theory and facts at each other until they’ve gotten The Whole Truth of the matter down to their satisfaction.

Yeahhhhhh, no. Nope. Not dealing with this anymore. Jason has recently began caring about his mental health now that he’s slowly been purified. He’s not going to let his progress flop with an encounter like this.

He was about to fuck off to one of his safe-houses when he heard a familiar voice.

“What in Ancients’ name are you all doing here?!”

It was Danny, floating above them with his arms crossed and a glare on his face. Tim and Bernard tried to explain to Jason what the ghostly glamour was doing to avoid him from recognizing Danny’s face, but Jason was busy relaxing in Danny’s purification hugs to listen to the two excitable puppies yip theories at him. But, if the glamour weren’t there, Jason could bet that the glare would look similar, if not identical, to Damian’s.

“Your Highness!” the ghosts greeted, bowing towards Danny before excitedly straightening up.

They all talked at the same time, trying to explain their reasoning. It was entertaining how the little blob ghosts cooed and did little flips in the air.

With one hand held up from Danny, they all shut up.

“I don’t want to know your reasons, nor do I want to know how you all found out about this place,” he said. The way the kid said it reminded him too much of Bruce when he’s about to ground the batkids (Jason included). Then, Danny pointed to the side, a portal open that was definitely made by Danny himself. “I want all of you back to the Ghost Zone in the next minute. Do not disturb this place again.”

All the ghosts deflated, the human-looking ones slouching and hunching their shoulders, as they all floated into the portal. They all mumbled their apologies as they did so. Once the final, sad blob ghost plopped itself into the swirling portal, Danny closed it and turned to Jason with an apologetic smile.

“Sorry about that, man,” he said.

Jason walked up to him with hands in his pockets, chuckling. “Must be tough running a kingdom, Your Highness.”

Danny groaned. “Please don’t call me that,” he whined.

“But Your Highness,” said Jason dramatically, because he’s a little shit like that, “I am but a mere commoner! I wouldn’t dare address you so informally!”

Danny snorted, punching playfully at Jason’s shoulder. “You’re an ass!”

Jason grinned. “Good.”

Then, as if remembering something, Danny brings out an envelope from one of his ghostly pockets and hands it to Jason. “Clockwork has a job for you,” he said. “But you can refuse if you don’t wanna do it. It’s a really tiring job, and you’d only be paid in ghost money, which isn’t even applicable in the mortal realm.”

Jason took the envelope, opened it, and looked over the cursive writing he imagined characters in Jane Austen’s books writing like. Well, almost like. The ink was in Neon Green.

“This Clock-y dude is...”

“He’s basically my advisor,” Danny said, not explaining more.

Jason hummed in response. Then, he shrugged.

“Tell Clock-y I’m not doing it, then,” he said, folding the letter and placing it back inside the envelope. “We’ll have our own feast here, with Timmy, Berny and your freaky friends. I’m not cooking for some stuffy, rich ghosts.”

Danny laughed. “I’ll tell Clockwork that,” he said with a grin. “I think he also wanted to taste your food.”

Jason huffed, waving a hand in the air. “If that’s all, I’m gonna head into my apartment and get some much needed sleep, thank you.”

Danny nodded towards him. “Sure,” he said, then he opened his arms. On instinct, Jason hugged Danny back. There was no purification happening, it was just a hug. And, damn, does this kid give good hugs. The Demon Brat should learn from him.

“Thanks,” Danny said when they pulled away.

“Yeah, yeah,” Jason said, already walking to his home. “Get going kid.”

Danny chuckled.

Jason then heard the sound of a portal opening. The moment Jason unlocked his door, Danny had already left.

********

[Bonus Scene: Time with Tim!!!]

Tim wanted to punch Danny.

Now don’t get Tim wrong. He likes Danny. He doesn’t try to kill or maim him, he doesn’t insult him, and he even lets Tim hang out with him when he goes exploring to different parts of the Earth! Initially, it was to help him find his clone-sister that he hasn’t seen for 3 months because they ended up becoming a bit too competitive in their Global-Hide-and-Seek. After meeting Dani, the invitations to illegally visit other countries together became more and more. Bernard came with them sometimes. Heck, even Jason tagged along in some of them.

Where was Tim going with this again?

Oh yeah, punching Danny. Right.

You see... There was this baby ghost with a grandfather clock ticking in his chest and a clock in his staff floating in his apartment. And when the baby talked, he sounded like a grown man.

He called himself Clockwork. The Master of Time.

It’s only been 32 hours since he last slept. So, this definitely cannot be one of his sleep-deprived hallucinations.

And Danny mentioned a Clockwork once.... ohhhhhh.....

“Yes, oh.”

Now, Tim only knows Clockwork based on what Danny had told him. That he is a mentor and advisor, a friend and a parental figure. But, what Tim does not know is whether this... entity... wouldn’t attack him or see Tim as a threat.

So, you see why he wanted to punch him?? Tim shouldn’t be meeting ghosts while sleep-deprived, and now he’s meeting someone who may very well be a god.

And, well, this is Tim’s Fourth encounter with a ghost (his third encounter being with Cujo the ghost dog). Not all ghosts are going to be as friendly as Danny.

“I admire your alertness in this situation,” said the baby, and suddenly, the baby turned into an adult man. “But I come here in peace,” he continued. Now, he turned into an old man. “And I come here to ask for assistance.” He turned back into a baby.

Tim could only blink. He was still holding the papers to the latest cold case he was solving and he was swaying on his feet.

“Uhhhhh....”

“It involves the Ra’s Al Ghul,” he said.

Tim’s brain restarted. His whole body suddenly became very alert. The tiredness he was feeling was no longer there, and Tim had Clockwork’s full attention.

“What about him?” he asked.

Clockwork morphed into an adult, and then into an old man, stroking his beard as he waved his staff.

As if looking at a hologram, an image of Ra’s Al Ghul floated into the air. And, with a light tap, it was like watching a video start playing.

“Pathetic,” Ra’s spat.

The scene panned to Danny on the ground, heaving and crying as he clutched... Damian to his chest. Behind Danny, there laid familiar figures: himself, Jason, Dick and Bruce, and farther away was Danny’s friends that Tim had only seen in photos. Even without physically checking, Tim could tell that they were all... dead.

“Because of you, I have lost my heir,” said Ra’s. “My daughter had lost her dear son. And this world had lost some of the best heroes.”

“Shut up,” Danny growled. And that growl brought shivers down Tim’s spine.

“You call yourself a King? Well, I guess now you have gained more subjects to your pathetic little kingdom.”

“I said... Shut. UP!”

Tim watched with wide eyes as Ra’s was flown back. Then, as Ra’s back hit the wall, Tim watched as his soul was brought out of the old man’s body. Danny was there in front of Ra’s in an instant, clutching at his ghostly neck, and snarling with red eyes and skin turning from Damian’s lively brown to a ghostly blue pallor. Tim felt goosebumps forming on his arms.

Ra’s was writhing in Danny’s hold, clawing at Danny’s arms to try and get even an inch of oxygen. But Ra’s is a ghost in this vision of the future. He did not need to breathe. He needed to escape.

Ra’s form began to glow, and the old man began to scream.

Danny’s hold became tighter and tighter on Ra’s, not blinking for a second when the light turned blinding, causing Tim to close his eyes. Then, when he opened them, in Danny’s hand was... a glowing sphere.

“That is a core,” Clockwork said from behind him. Tim made no move to look towards him, only focusing on what Danny was going to do with it. “A core is what brings life to ghosts, as it is both their heart and their mind. Their soul. Their source of life. Without it, a ghost would not exist any longer.”

And just as Clockwork had finished explaining, Tim watched as Danny destroyed Ra’s core.

Danny then turned to look behind him. It was void of any emotion. So empty. It was back to its regular neon green, but it didn’t glow with life like the current Danny does.

One last look around, Danny snarled once more. He clenches his fists, and his eyes turned red. Then, Tim watched as Danny screamed to the sky, destroying everything around him.

The vision ended.

Tim had so many thoughts. So many questions.

“This future is not definite,” Clockwork says, and continuing as he turns into an adult, “and there are choices that can be made to avoid this.”

“Why are you telling me all this?” Tim asked. “I’m thankful that you’re giving me a warning, something to investigate so that I could keep my family safe, but I have a feeling that this isn’t about my family at all. Neither was it about Ra’s, was it.”

“It is not,” said Clockwork, turning into an old man. Interestingly, this version of Clockwork reminded him of a grieving Alfred, whose eyes and expression made him look older and tired. “It is to avoid what Danny may become.”

What he may become.

Tim thinks of Bruce when he lost Jason. Bruce who became aggressive to the point he was close to killing himself. Bruce who needed a Robin to gain back the light in his eyes and become the Batman that the people of Gotham trusted to protect them.

However, unlike when he was young, he had experienced many things. Although it was him that Clockwork was showing this to, Tim knew that Tim wasn’t the only person that could help make a change to keep this future from happening. He wouldn’t have to take up the responsibility by himself.

Danny has people who would be by his side no matter what. Support him no matter the struggle. Perhaps it was because Tim learned all this that Clockwork was telling him.

And, yes. Clockwork seemed to know what Tim was thinking, because he gave him a grin, morphing into an adult. “It seems that my time here is up,” he said, opening a portal for himself. And without another word, Clockwork was gone.

#ayyyyy #dc x dp #dp x dc #jason todd #tim drake #danny fenton #danny phantom #this is a thank you for reading my other post!!#i hope you all like it!! uwu

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nightwingmyboi · 4 years

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Dick Grayson and Temper

For whatever reason, Dick’s temper has become one of the main traits that people focus on when looking at Dick’s character. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, since he does have quite the temper, but since it has become one of those essential aspects of his personality for a lot of people, I just wanted to clarify a few things I think get misconstrued?

Certain people take Dick having a temper and equate it with him having anger issues or thin skin. It’s bled into art, text posts, fics...where Dick is described/shown essentially as a petty asshole, someone who has a tendency to overreact and lash out at family and friends, someone who is whiny and always complaining (@bigskydreaming goes a little more into this perception here). I don’t think this is a fair interpretation of Dick’s character at all. There are two main things I feel like people need to keep in mind when thinking about Dick’s temper.

1.) Dick’s infamous temper is, 9 times out of 10, directed at criminals.

Nightwing (1996) #65

When Dick mentions struggling with his temper, he is almost always talking about the anger he feels towards criminals, not loved ones. When he sees people hurt or in danger, especially those closest to him, he gets pissed and can go too far. He often gets angry in defense of his family and those he protects.

Titans Vol. 2 #29

Batman and Robin #12

In fact, one of the biggest examples of his temper is him beating the Joker to death, as a result of the Joker killing Jason and Tim. Like many heroes, Dick struggles with not crossing the line when faced with crime; this doesn’t mean that he is the same way with those he loves.

2.) In most circumstances, Dick has demonstrated excellent control of his anger. So, Dick may have a bad temper...but it usually doesn’t make an appearance unless he is under an immense amount of pressure (and sometimes not even then).

Injustice Gods Among Us #16

Dick’s not a doormat and he can be confrontational if that’s what is needed to get the job done, but he is also known for keeping a cool head under immense pressure and stress. He’s known in the superhero community for resolving conflict and has often been called “the glue” that keeps various teams together. That wouldn’t mesh with the idea that he is constantly losing his temper. In fact, his middle name might as well be de-escalation, because that’s pretty consistently what he does. Look at how he acts in various arguments:

Example #1: While Nightwing is off-world with the Titans, Jason dies. Likely struggling with grief, Bruce doesn’t attempt to contact Dick while he is off world or when he returns. Dick is left to find out through a teammate, Danny Chase. Despite being left in the dark, Dick still goes to the cave to try to support Bruce. He puts his feelings to the side, and doesn’t even bring up the fact that he was hurt by Bruce’s exclusion. Unfortunately, the conversation derails regardless, and Bruce ends up hitting Dick and telling him that it was a mistake to invite Dick into his life.

The New Teen Titans #55

Look at how Dick reacts. Even when Batman hits him and yells extremely harsh things at him, he doesn’t lash out in turn or yell back. He keeps calm and continues to talk to Batman; he likely understands that this is a product of Bruce’s grief and as a result allows his feelings/hurts to go unaddressed.

Example #2 (inspired by @hood-ex post here): Garth loses his temper when he learns that the Titans won’t help him with a problem he’s having. When Robin tries to stop the fight, Garth punches him.

Teen Titans (1966) #28

After he takes the hit, Dick continues to try to keep people from fighting, and in the end, Dick once again puts his bruised feelings to the side and doesn’t say a word of complaint to keep team unity. He still goes and helps Garth with his problem.

Example #3: After Donna’s death, Dick was devastated. He spiraled into depression. In the aftermath, he was stricter and quicker to anger than he would normally be. Even his leadership of the Outsiders was effected, and as a result, Anissa, Black Lightning’s daughter, was seriously hurt. Black Lightning is not pleased; he slams Nightwing against a wall and yells at him.

Outsiders (2003) #16

Even when Dick is emotionally compromised and short tempered, he still isn’t looking for a fight. He doesn’t retaliate when Black Lightning slams him against the wall, and he doesn’t interrupt when Pierce tears into him (for a whole page of the comic). It’s not like Pierce goes easy with his criticism; yet, Dick remains stoic and takes it. He doesn’t say a word of complaint or defense, and he doesn’t lash out. He keeps his temper under control. (Just an fyi for those wondering, but this is definitely one of those times Dick deserved a harsh talking to, lmao, support you Black Lightning!!)

Example #4: The Batfam is fighting a villain known as Mother, who is known for brainwashing people. Anyone could be in her control, so when Tim is acting suspiciously, Dick decides to investigate to ensure that Tim is not a double agent. Dick finds out that Tim secretly kept his family in a hidden location to protect them, and unintentionally brings trouble to their door. On the flip side, Tim gets angry at Dick for sneaking around behind his back and putting his family in danger. Though Dick tries to explain his actions, Tim won’t hear it and instead throws a punch.

Batman and Robin Eternal #5

Even when Tim punches him out of the blue, ironically because he can’t control his temper, Dick just takes the hit and lets him walk away. He doesn’t ever push Tim for an apology, and Tim never gives one. The rest of the series, people give Dick crap for betraying Tim’s trust, and despite Dick’s reasonable concerns being the impetus for his actions, Dick accepts the other’s criticism without complaint.

Examples #5-57: Just think of all the times that Damian insulted Dick and told him he couldn’t cut it and generally was acting like a little shit, when Dick was struggling with Batman’s death and with taking on the cowl and with running Bruce’s life, and Dick still never gave up on Damian and gave him Robin. Very patient, very thick skin.

And I could add even more moments! I don’t mean to go overboard, but the idea is that, over pretty much his entire history, from Robin to Nightwing to Batman and back, there are more times that Dick puts his feelings to the side and lets people yell at him (and basically physically assault him RIP) for the greater good, then times he flies off the handle and loses his temper, especially when compared to other characters in the Batfam. Seeing people say that Dick is secretly an angry asshole when pushed a little or is always blowing things out of proportion and being whiny is just annoying, especially when Dick canonically has worked very hard to keep his cool and mediate in various tense situations, even when he has reason to get offended and retaliate.

And this isn’t me saying that Dick can’t lash out, cause duh he’s a human being and he’s not perfect. He does have a temper and sometimes can say harsh things to those he loves. But, he doesn’t usually lose his cool, and when he does it is usually a surprise. The rarity of Nightwing giving into his temper is part of the reason it is so impactful when he does fly off the handle.

A lot of the panels you see floating around about Dick’s temper are 1) from times he was brainwashed or mentally influenced (Dick yelling at Donna, Alfred, and Joey are all from a single time when he was brainwashed by Brotherblood for example), 2) from times he was in great emotional/mental distress from the deaths of those close to him, or 3) examples of times that Dick is standing up for himself, that I don’t really see as him having a temper? And a lot of those fights/arguments that are shown are not as one sided as tumblr makes them seem, lmao. Either way, most of these times aren’t really representative of his normal behavior or attitude.

In conclusion, Dick isn’t some petty jerk with anger management issues; he’s a human being, who sometimes gets angry and upset like every other human being in the world. He has a temper, but I don’t feel like it should define him in the way and to the extent that it currently does.

P.S. This isn’t me trying to excuse the times that Dick has been nasty and let his temper run away from him, obviously. Like I said, he’s human and he’s made mistakes. But he doesn’t lash out normally or often. I’m just trying to put things in perspective.

#batman is prob the only one who can really make him lose it #and bruce kind of deserves a little talk back in my opinion lmao #plus his temper has literally vanished into thin air #in these rebirth comics #so for people to be making it so integral #is just trying to make Dick out to be a jerk lmao #nightwing #dick grayson #bruce wayne #batman #tim drake #red robin #teen titans #outsiders #temper #dick grayson temper #character analysis #meta

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sprnklersplashes · 5 years

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burning the memories

AO3

On a trip to visit her grandparents and Aunt Veronica in Ohio, Janis comes across her Aunt's high school memories and learns more about her than she thought she could. Veronica's past comes back to haunt her and she realises she can't outrun it unless she lets it go.

Words: 7k

(Set in a universe where Veronica is Janis’ aunt)

Janis is convinced her Aunt Veronica is the coolest person on the planet. From living on her own with her two cats in her New York apartment to being a kick ass social worker to somehow always knowing exactly what Janis wants every birthday and Christmas, there is no one like her. Her style still seems stuck in the 1980s; she’s almost always wearing a blue blazer and a skirt but she makes it work. She still turns heads and despite a few flings with men and women here and there, she doesn’t seem to want to commit to anyone. She just flies above it all, not caring about what anyone else has to say, stating simply that she ran out of fucks to give in 1989.

So of course, when her mom proposes that they go to his childhood home in Ohio during the summer to meet up with her and her grandparents, Janis has her suitcase half-packed. Aunt Veronica is the one thing that can make these reunion trips worth it. It’s worth the four hour drive in her dad’s car and people asking if she has a boyfriend yet and having that awkward conversation (how many times can people “forget” that she’s a lesbian?), casting eyes at the tips of her hair and her clothes and fake nails and heavy make-up, the rolling eyes and fake smiles when Janis tells them about her plans to study art. She has to fight the urge to flip them off until she can get home and vent everything to Veronica in private over coffee.

They get into her grandparents’ place first, with her grandma remarking how much she’s grown and asking about school and giving her cookies and her grandpa handing her a ten dollar bill and asking if she’s keeping her hair like that and mentioning how her outfit (graphic tee shirt, ripped black shorts, fishnet tights and an oversized blue shirt) is very creative.

“Creative is one word for it,” a voice says from behind the stairs. She turns and sees a thin, dark haired woman in a blue blazer and grey skinny jeans leaning on the banister, smirking.

“Aunt Veronica!” Janis laughs, running up for a hug.

“You got tall,” she remarks, throwing her arms around her and squeezing her tightly. “Though that might the boots.”

Within half an hour they’re all sitting around the kitchen table. It’s more cramped now than it probably was when her mom and Aunt Veronica were living there, but her grandpa insists on sitting on the armchair in the corner to make room.

“So Janis how’s school?” her grandma asks, pushing her pasta bake around on her plate.

“Fine,” she says. “I won a prize at this art expo.”

“Oh my god, Janis, that’s awesome!” Veronica says, nudging her with her elbow. “What was it?”

“It was this portrait I did of me and Damian and Cady,” she explains. “Cady’s new, she just joined this year.”

“She moved there from Kenya, right Jan?” her dad adds, refilling his glass of Coke. “Janis stepped in to help show her the ropes.”

“Well that was sweet of you,” her grandpa remarks from the chair.

“What brought her from Kenya to Illinois?” Veronica asks, snickering slightly.

“She said her parents were researcher zoologists until they lost their funding,” she explains. “But yeah, Cady’s pretty cool. I mean, she’s a little weird, but she’s awesome.”

“And… how is Damian?” her grandma asks, twirling her fork around, and Janis suppresses the urge to groan.

“Damian’s great, Grandma,” she says patiently. “He just started dating this boy from his drama club, so that’s great.” Beside her, she swears Veronica laughs before disguising it with a drink.

“And what about you, Janis? Any girls making your head turn?” she asks, looking over at her grandma.

Coolest. Woman. Alive.

“Not really,” she says, looking down at her plate. No girls had really caught her eye-except for the girl Damian took to calling ‘Danny DeVito girl’ after that one episode in the bathroom, but she knew her name was Gianna. Still, she barely sees her outside of history class.

“Oh, Ronnie, before I forget,” her grandma said. “We found a bunch of your old high school stuff in your old room. It was all boxed up, we didn’t know what you want done with it. It must have been left here when you moved out.”

“Oh, thanks,” Veronica says. “I’ll take a look at it tomorrow.” She stays quiet for the rest of the meal, making small, three word comments on whatever comes up in conversation, even about her own job, which is weird, as well as supremely disappointing. There’s few things Janis loves more than hearing about how she took another kid off shithole parents, and Veronica loves talking about it. Still, she shakes off whatever was bothering her when the apple pie is rolled out, sliding second helpings onto Janis’ plate when no-one’s looking.

“You know,” Veronica says in a low voice while the rest of the adults are stuck in conversation about the traffic on the way up. “If you don’t have any plans this summer… maybe you could come up to New York for a bit?”

“Are you serious?” Janis asks, feeling her heart begin to pound.

“Sure,” she says. “I know there’s art galleries around where I live that you’d love, and I’d get some quality time with my favourite niece.”

“Your only niece,” she reminds her, but she can’t supress the smile on her face. If she were Cady, she’d probably start squealing. “Thank you, Aunt Veronica!”

“Let me talk it over with your parents first,” she reminds her, placing her hand over hers and draining her glass.

“You’re the coolest person here,” Janis says, and Veronica blushes, laughing. “When and how did you get to be so cool?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” she says, her voice quiet.

Janis leans on the doorframe of her Aunt Veronica’s old room, having snuck away from the brunch discussions of what their neighbours were growing in their garden. She knocks on the wood, holding a plate of French toast, fried eggs and bacon in one hand. Veronica looks up from the box sitting on her bed. The bed is covered with all sorts; photos, books, clothes, all from her aunt’s high school years.

“I come with gifts,” Janis says, waving the plate in front of her. “You wouldn’t want to miss Grandma’s French toast, would you?”

“Of course not,” she says, taking the plate from her with a grateful smile.

“Is it cool if I hang here?” Janis asks, sitting on the bed like the question was already answered. “I’ll go insane if I spend any more time down there.”

“Sure, kid,” she says, placing the plate on her nightstand and taking a piece of bacon in her hand. There’s something in her face, how her smile doesn’t quite meet her eyes, how her eyes look kind of… well, scared. “Feel free to check out the Westerburg High memorabilia.”

Janis picks up a pile of polaroids and starts looking through them.

“You know these are back in fashion now,” she remarks, waving the photos. “This girl… my friend Karen, she loves them.” It’s odd, referring to the Plastics as “friends” now that they’ve disbanded. She’ll never in her life refer to Regina as one, but Gretchen’s not too bad and Karen is actually kind of fun, in a lost kitten kind of way that makes Janis want to protect her for the rest of her life. “Is this you?” The girl in the photo has to be Veronica, same cheekbones and wild dark hair and brown eyes and cheesy, wide smile (Janis kind of feels like she’s looking in a mirror), but she looks way different. She’s wearing a long red dress and denim jacket, a far cry from what she wears now. She looks like she didn’t even look in the mirror before leaving the house.

“Yeah, that’s me. March 1989,” she reads. “I was a junior.” She chuckles under her breath. “God you’re the spitting image of me at that age. I think that was my best friend Martha’s 17th birthday.” She points at the other girl in the photo, dark haired with glasses and a pink sweatshirt. “Yeah, she was my best friend from diapers.”

“What’s she doing now?”

“Kindergarten teacher up here,” she says with a soft smile. “Martha loves Sherwood so much she couldn’t leave if she tried. We’re still close though.” Janis hums and continues looking through them, finding more photos of Veronica and her friend Martha, sitting at school, in the park, in what she guesses is Martha’s room, all while Veronica keeps looking through the other stuff.

Suddenly, she finds one in which her aunt seems to have done a complete metamorphosis. Gone is the frumpy, slightly too big clothes of the ones before, in this one she’s in a fitted blue blazer and grey miniskirt, her eyelids blue and lips red, standing in someone’s backyard with a croquet mallet on her shoulder with three other girls; a tall, blonde girl in a red blazer and shoulder pads, a bright red scrunchie in her hair and a smirk that echoes Regina George on her face, a smaller blonde girl in yellow whose hair is in curls and an Asian girl in green with her hair pinned back. They’re all wearing the same style of all-American preppy blazers and miniskirts, and all have croquet mallets matching the colour of their clothes. While they all stand in a cluster, Veronica distances herself slightly from them, but still leaning in and still smiling at the camera. Along the bottom, someone wrote ‘Heather, Heather, Heather and Veronica-September 12th, 1989’.

“Woah, Aunt V,” she remarks. “What happened in September 1989?”

“What?” Veronica asks hastily. She comes over and looks at the photo in Janis’ hands and her face turns red.

“Aunt V?”

“It’s fine,” she says, not clarifying what ‘it’ is. “For a while… I was friends with some popular girls.”

“You were a plastic?” she asks in disbelief. No way. She refuses to believe that Veronica was ever a Regina George.

“Plastic?” she repeats, wrinkling her nose.

“It’s what we called this trio of megabitches in my school,” Janis explains. “Gretchen, Karen, and Regina George at the centre of it all.”

“Oh, that bitch Regina,” Veronica says. When her life fell apart after the “space dyke” incident, it was Veronica who had sped like crazy down the freeway to Illinois and took her out for ice cream and movies until she could smile again. She had even offered to pay for her to go to a private school in New York when her parents pulled her out. She could never be a Regina George. “We called them the Heathers. There was Heather Duke…” She points at the green one. “Heather MacNamara…” The yellow one. “And… Heather Chandler.” Her finger lands on the red one. She takes in a deep breath.

“I take it Chandler was your Regina,” she says. “Why were they all called Heather?”

“Universe is weird like that,” she answers off handedly. She’s staring at the photo so intensely she might burn a hole through it.

“Aunt V… you okay?” she asks.

“Fine,” she says, shaking her head. “We weren’t friends for that long anyway. We were at this homecoming party and they wanted to do this really bitchy thing to my friend. So….” She twirls a lock of hair around her finger. “I puked on Chandler and told her to lick it up.”

“Oh my God!” Janis laughs. “You’re such a badass, Aunt V!” Veronica chuckles and shakes her head. She looks around at the stuff around her, two cardboard boxes worth of high school memories.

“I’m going to get some trash bags. At least half of this stuff I want to throw out.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. It’s just junk now,” she says. “Be right back.” She runs out the door, her footsteps fading as she went down the hall. Janis keeps flicking through the photos, mainly ones of her and the Heathers.

The she finds another one. Veronica, still in the “popular girl” look, sitting on a wall, staring up at the sky, laughing. Then the next one, a dark-haired, brown-eyed boy is on the wall with her. The camera is so close that he must be holding it. The old school selfie. His arm is around her and the other holds the camera. She rests her chin on his shoulder, her smile easy and open, her eyes sparkling. The boy is smiling too. The writing on the bottom reads “September 30th, 1989, Our Love Is God”. The next one is them cuddling, him standing behind her with his arms wrapped around her, kissing the back of her head while she laughs. Someone else must have taken it for them or they set it on a timer. “October 3rd, 1989, You’re in my heart like a Madonna on a pedestal.” And another one of Veronica standing against a brick wall, her hands flat against the wall and one foot leaning against it “October 10th, 1989, We love the things we love for what they are”. And another of the boy, who clearly doesn’t know he’s having his photo taken, drinking a red slushie. “October 15th, 1989, JD doesn’t know I’m taking a picture and still looks good”.

“Holy shit, Aunt V,” Janis mutters. Who knew she had a thing for bad boys? She flicks through more photos, all of her and Mysterious Trench Coat Kid (JD, she assumes), until she finds herself back at the start. She puts the pile down and keeps sorting through stuff, finding a yearbook and older class notebooks and a small, black book with 1989 written on the spine in gold lettering.

Holy shit. Her diary.

She looks over at the door and back at the book. She knows it’s wrong. She knows she shouldn’t look through her aunt’s private stuff. But then again, it’s from 1989, what could she have done as a teenager that she’s so scared of people finding out? And… Okay, she really just wants to know who the mysterious JD was.

“September 1st, 1989, Dear Diary,

I believe I’m a good person, you know I think that there’s good in everyone, but here we are, first day of senior year. And I look around at these kids I’ve known all my life and ask myself…. What happened?....”

“September 22nd, 1989, Dear Diary

It’s been three weeks since I became friends with the Heathers. Well, friends isn’t exactly the right word. It’s like the Heathers are people who I work with and our job is being popular and shit.”

“Still September 22nd, 1989, Dear Diary,

Why when you see boys fight does it look so horrible, but feel so right? I shouldn’t watch this crap, that’s not who I am, but with Mr No Name Kid here… damn.”

“October 2nd, 1989, Dear Diary,

JD’s dad will not be speaking at our wedding.”

Holy shit, she thinks. Wedding? She was planning a wedding already? Calm down there, Aunt Veronica. So JD. It had to have been a nickname. It suits the boy she sees in the photo-the rebellious bad boy apparently sweeping her off her feet. She imagines some sort of Bonnie and Clyde style love affair, or a Romeo and Juliet whirlwind where Veronica’s dad had been desperate to keep his squeaky clean girl away from the troublemaker?

She hears her footsteps in the hall and quickly closes the book, dropping it back in the box. Aunt Veronica comes back in with two trash bags in one hand and a coffee mug in the other.

“Sorry, got sidetracked by coffee, although I did bring you a cookie,” she says, handing her over one.

“Thanks,” she says, taking a bite out of it while Veronica starts tossing bits and pieces into one of the bags. “So… who’s JD?”

Something changes in her. Janis expected her to blush or laugh off the bad boy she seemingly had a little affair with as a teenager; instead the bag falls from her hand, her eyes look up at her, wide and fearful, her breathing gets faster, her face paler. She looks so much younger now, like the seventeen year old she saw in the photos.

“JD?” she repeats weakly. “Where… how did you hear about JD?”

“I found some pictures of you and him.” She slides her hands into her back pockets, regret pounding in her chest. Veronica picks up the photos and Janis can see them shaking in her hands. She feels like she opened up Pandora’s Box, unleashing all the terrors inside. Another terror sits heavily in her chest, fighting its way up her throat and out of her mouth almost against her will. She could never keep stuff from Veronica. “And… I may have peaked in your old diary.”

“My diary?” she asks sharply. “My 1989 diary? You looked in there?” Her voice gets more frantic and Janis gets more scared and even more guilty. She can feel her ‘favourite niece’ status slipping away.

“I know, I’m sorry I shouldn’t have looked in there!” she apologises. “I’m sorry, Aunt V.”

“What did you read in it?” she asks. If Janis didn’t know better, she’d have sworn she was scared. No, she is beyond scared. Terrified is a more accurate term. Veronica looks like she’s struggling to catch her breath, her fists curling and uncurling. “Janis I need to know; what did you read in it?”

“Nothing important,” she says. “Just… like the stuff about the people in your senior year and the Heathers were people you worked with and how JD’s dad wasn’t going to be speaking at your wedding!” She feels her lip begin to tremble and she swears to herself she won’t cry. “I’m sorry, Aunt Veronica, I know I shouldn’t have look in it.”

Veronica sighs and lowers herself on to the bed, burying her face in her hands.

“It’s okay,” she says. “It’s okay, Janis. I’m sorry I got so worked up.” She pulls Janis’ hand and gets to her sit down next to her. She lets out a breath and laughs slightly, running a hand through her hair. “JD was my boyfriend in senior year.”

“That much I gathered,” she jokes. “I mean…Our Love Is God isn’t something you’d say to your friends.”

“He said all kinds of stuff like that,” she tells her. She pulls her jacket tighter around herself, her eyes filling with tears. Janis puts an arm around her.

“It ended badly?” she asks softly. Veronica stays quiet, looking at her hands.

“He killed himself,” she whispers after a while.

“Shit,” Janis says. “Aunt Veronica, I’m so sorry.” Veronica threads her fingers in Janis’.

“Kid, it was nearly 30 years ago,” she says. “I’m not… I’m not over it but, I guess I moved on.” She reaches over with her free hand and takes the pile of photos, looking at the one of him and her at the 7/11. “And yeah… it wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows when he was alive. His dad was an ass, for starters. He messed JD up pretty bad. And that’s…” She wipes tears away from her eyes and Janis’ heart breaks. She wishes she’d never looked at the damn photos. “I guess that’s why I try so hard now. Try to take kids off bad dads like that. Stop future JDs in their tracks.”

“Aunt V,” Janis protests. “You know it’s not your job to stop people, right? If people are bad, then they’re bad.”

“I know,” she says. “I just never stopped thinking what if his dad had been good? Or if someone had looked out for him.” Janis wants to shake her head and tell her that his problems don’t matter if he hurt her (and she can tell that he did) but she keeps her mouth shut. “I’m sorry for getting mad, Jan. And for unloading all of this on you.”

“It’s fine,” she says. “I’m sorry I read your diary.” Veronica shakes her head and pulls her into a hug.

“You know, you’re the only one in this family who knows he was my boyfriend?” she asks. “My mom and dad thought that we were just friends and your mom was away at college while it was all going down.” Janis smiles, feeling small sense of pride amongst all her guilt. Sharing a secret with her aunt, even if it’s about her bad boy former flame. Though she does wonder how her grandparents missed the fact that they were more than friends.

She knows there’s more she’s not telling, and she’s more than okay with that. First things first, she knows she doesn’t want to know exactly what went down between them. She’s not sure she can stomach the details. And she knows that it’s probably better if Aunt Veronica keeps them to herself.

By Veronica’s count, it’s been twenty one years since her last JD related nightmare. Her and her partner Anna had just started getting serious, and Anna was staying over at her house. That night, while curled up next to her, Veronica had dreamed about Anna pounding on her closet door while she barricaded herself inside, telling her about after and destiny and how they were meant to be together, the words “meant to be yours” being repeated over and over again until the voice turned into something different. Into him.

She had woken up screaming and she broke up with Anna the next week.

Still, after that episode, she went twenty one years nightmare free.

Until she bolted up in bed at 2:30 am, muffling her scream with her hands, an old trick she learned in college, feeling her heart in a frantic rhythm against her ribs.

She had dreamed about him blowing himself up again up again, except this time he was taking her down with him. She still feels her arms wrapped around him, the bomb digging into her chest, her fingers fisting in his coat as he tells her again “I worship you” and she just numbly nods, Heather Chandler pressing against her, whispering “see you in Hell, biotch” just before the bomb goes off and rips her to pieces.

After senior year, she had stashed everything into a box and hid it under a pile of other stuff in her room, hoping to never have to look at it again. She had almost forgotten about everything that was in there. It’s everything she wishes she could erase from her memory about her time in high school. Everything she regrets and misses the most.

She kicks the blankets off her, feeling suffocated by them, and looks at the bags of trash filled with all her high school memories. She had just wanted to get rid of all of it, clean the slate, to use JD’s turn of phrase, act like those months had never existed, but now she’s not so sure.

She gets up and opens one, looking at its contents from the lamp on her bedside table. She still can’t sleep in the dark, even now. Inside there’s her old notebooks and clothes that haven’t fit since she was a teenager and her old yearbook. She pulls out the yearbook, running her finger down the spine. She somehow opens it to the last page she wants to see; “In Memory Of Heather Chandler”. Heather’s photo beams out from the middle of the double page, all red lipstick and blonde curls. Words from students crowd around it “Always In Our Hearts”, “Rest In Power Heather”, “Drinking Rum and Coke With The Angels” (because there’s plenty of that in Heaven), “I’m Sorry I Didn’t Know” “You Deserved Better” (well maybe that’s not an unfair statement). And pride of place, close as possible to her picture “Best Friends Forever-Heather M” and “Miss You Forever-Heather D”.

She turns the page and finds Kurt and Ram’s memorial page, adorned with rainbows. She bites her lip as tears well in her eyes. More messages from the students are scattered around the page, promises to make the world a better place, to stamp out bigotry and prejudice. Apparently their dads did that until the day they died.

When she turns the page, there’s one more memorial page; Jason Dean. It’s blindingly different from the other two. One picture of him in the middle, God knows where they got it because it wasn’t taken at school. A little blurb explaining how he came into the school in September and died in November during the pep rally. The official explanation was that he had killed himself during the rally by blowing himself up in the football field.

Veronica had forged a pretty great note for it.

Hardly anyone had any words to say about him, though a couple of well-intentioned kids on the yearbook committee added some. “I Wish I’d Known Him” (trust me, she had thought when she first read it, you don’t), “Rest In Peace, Jason”, “Your Time With Us Was Short But Wonderful”. In the corner, there’s her handwriting, “I wish you’d stayed around a little longer”, then scribbled out so violently the page tore. She wishes a lot of things, but not that he had stayed around. Not in the way he was anyway.

She puts the yearbook aside and keeps looking through it, finding an old videotape. No title, except a white label with “Halloween, 1989” written in her handwriting. She wracks her brain for what happened then, and she draws a blank. Thankfully, her old TV and video player are still in her room, so she pulls them both onto the floor with her and slides it in, turning the volume low enough so that only she can hear it.

The picture comes into view and it’s her, wearing a long sleeved black minidress and tights and a pair of cat ears, raising her eyebrows and laughing, putting candy into a large orange bowl decorated with black cats and spiderwebs.

“Are you filming this right now?” the 1989 version of her asks.

“Yeah of course,” JD replies, taking a step closer. “Look at this folks, pure Halloween commitment right here.” The camera zooms in on her dress, on her cat ears, the whiskers drawn onto her unimpressed face with eyeliner.

Her heart stops at the sound of his voice. He sounds so different to what she remembers. His voice is higher, softer. He doesn’t sound like he does in her nightmares. He doesn’t sound like the kind of person who would storm into her room, tell her he wanted to kill her, tell her he was blowing up the school. He doesn’t sound broken or damaged. He sounds normal, happy, relaxed and it cuts her deep.

“Oh, okay,” the younger version of her says. “Now, look at this.” The picture shakes as the past version of her tries to take the camera off him while he makes tiny noises of protest. “No, give it, give me the camera.” Her voice is high pitched and nearly whiny, but she’s laughing, the same loud, dumb laugh she always used as a teenager. She used to complain to him about it and he assured her he loved the sound of her laugh.

“Or what?” he replies.

“Or you don’t get candy,” she teases.

A different fight plays out in the back of her mind, when they fought over something much more sinister. The two teenagers in the video didn’t deserve that. They didn’t know how it would all play out. The girl didn’t know the monster she was creating. The boy didn’t know just how broken he really was.

The younger Veronica wrestles the camera off JD with a triumphant laugh and turns it on him, snickering.

Her breath catches at the sight of him. He’s just like he is in the photos, except he’s moving. He’s more alive, laughing and twirling to show off his full costume. He’s even discarded his trench coat, she can see it sitting on the couch behind him, instead wearing a puffy white shirt and leather pants and an eye patch of all things.

“He’s a sexy pirate,” past her sings, zooming in on him. He leans against the wall dramatically and pouts at her, making her laugh.

“I’m a regular pirate,” he corrects her. “I just happen to always be sexy.” She laughs again, the camera tilting slightly like she’s leaning back.

“Yeah you are,” she agrees. The camera is place on the counter and she goes over to him, wrapping her arms around him and kissing him. He wraps his arms around her, tilting his head to deepen the kiss. She moans as he pulls her closer, getting rid of whatever space there was between them. Her hands get caught up in his hair while his trail on her legs, but never lifting her skirt.

It always got heated between them. Simple goodbye kisses turning into him letting her push him up against the wall and tongues and teeth clashing while hands were running along waistlines and through hair. He always let her take the lead, set her pace, be in control. It used to make her feel empowered. Having him underneath her, being willing to do anything she wanted, to obey her wishes. She never took it too far, asked if he was okay with it too, and he always was, looking at her with wide eyes and nodding enthusiastically.

She wonders now how much of it was real and how much was just him letting her get comfortable with him. Comfortable enough to be clay in his hands. It’s all so confusing to her know, love or infatuation, how much of her memories are viewed through the rose coloured lens she uses to make it hurt less, was he broken and damaged or just bad?

“Okay,” the younger Veronica breaks away, sounding breathless. “Movie time.” JD joins their hands as she lifts the bowl from the counter. Her eyes fall on the camera and realisation dawns on her. “Shit!”

“What?”

“We left the camera on,” she laughs, burying her face in the crook of his neck. “Oh we filmed that!”

“Oh my God,” he replies, laughing too. “Oh my God we filmed that. We filmed us making out.”

“Do not even talk about that,” she laughs.

“It’s your camera, right?” he asks as he wraps his arms around her. “So your parents will never see it?”

“They might!” she squeaks, wriggling out of his arms. “Okay, go get the popcorn started, I’m going to turn this off.”

Her face fills the camera as she lifts it, still laughing. Still young. Not too many scars.

“Sex tape!” JD whispers in the background, and she laughs harder.

“JD I swear to God-”

The picture changes and they’re in her living room. JD holds the camera, tilted at an angle so a sleeping Veronica is visible, curled up and using JD as a pillow. He’s smiling, open, earnest. His arm is around her and he kissed her forehead gently. She murmurs and snuggles closer to him. The way he looks at her can only really be described as reverence. Like she’s the Virgin Mary and he’s the most devout follower there is.

“Hello, person who is watching this tape,” he whispers. “Probably in the year 2127, when we’re all dead. You might notice this, but Veronica Sawyer is currently asleep on top of me. It is 1am here in Sherwood, Ohio and she fell asleep on my shoulder.” He runs his fingertips up and down her back, losing himself in thought for a moment. “If you’re in the future you probably never got to know her. Which is sad for you, really, because she’s the best damn thing humanity has to offer. And nothing that comes after her will really compare. And I am in love with her. I will love her until I die and even after that, I’m going to keep loving her.” Veronica shifts in her sleep and JD looks worried for a moment, but she just stretches her arm across his chest and settles down again. His face breaks out into a smile once more. “She’s the only thing that’s good in this world. I’m going to turn the camera off now so I don’t wake her up.”

The picture turns to black and he’s gone.

Veronica presses her hands to her mouth to muffle the sound of her crying.

This shouldn’t be happening. This was nearly 30 years ago. While she couldn’t get help with everything, she got counselling after JD’s death. She shouldn’t be sitting on the floor of her childhood bedroom, trying not to cry over a 29 year old video. She shouldn’t be falling back in love with a dead man, let alone a dead man who made her life hell for years and is the reason she flinches away from love even now, a man who was terrible and wanted to kill people and she shouldn’t even be thinking about because he’s been dead for nearly 30 years.

She’s reopened all her old wounds. All it took was one look from him and she’s back where she began.

Stupid heart. Holding onto someone who shouldn’t be allowed in there anymore. She used to think it would be better if she could just rip it out and stop herself from feeling anything again. But then she met people and made friends and reconnected with old ones and then Janis was born and took her heart in her tiny little baby hands. She would never stop herself from feeling all that. Even if it means she has to feel all of this too, the ugly and painful side of loving someone.

She keeps crying as she looks through the rest of the bag, Her fingers brush against something hard and she tenses. Her diary.

She kicks herself for keeping it. Putting aside every painful thing she put in here, it’s evidence. When Janis said that she’d gone through it, her heart had stopped and she had felt the world around her crumble. She only got as far as her first meeting with JD’s dad. But just one page later she wrote “Dear Diary…. Technically I didn’t kill Heather Chandler, I know that, but I still feel bad. But not as bad as I should. And that makes me feel even worse.” And then just two pages after that is the amazing line “Dear Diary, my teen angst bullshit has a body count”.

The most incriminating lines she could have written.

Janis thinks she’s the coolest person alive. Wonder how she’d feel about her after knowing that she’d murdered three people.

“Not you,” JD had told her. She supposes he’s right. But she doesn’t like saying that she was just an unwilling accomplice. She handed Heather Chandler the mug of drain cleaner, she shot at Kurt, she let JD shoot Ram. She fell for the “Ich Luge bullets” lie. Their blood is on her hands just as much as it was his. She doesn’t know if she believes in Heaven or Hell any more, but she knows that if there is a Hell, then she’ll burn for that.

And besides, in the mortal world, accomplices still do jail time.

She knows what she has to do. She’s just far too scared to do it.

It’s still pitch black outside when she sneaks out of the house, key in the pocket of the coat she wears over her pyjamas. She keeps the diary clutched to her chest as she makes her way down her old street to the one place she’s sure no one will suspect her of going.

Westerburg High stands just as imposing as it ever did before her, locked behind an iron fence. She started her senior year desperate to leave it then two months later she was risking everything to save it.

And where was her damn gratitude?

After the news broke about JD, things changed for her. People gave her sad eyes as they passed in the hallway, whispers of “I’m so sorry” and “if you need anything, I’m here” and teachers offering support and then the newspaper offering her an interview.

Still, she finally saw the hierarchy fall. Heather Mac started eating lunch with her and Martha and, seeing that she can’t exactly lead a clique of one person, so did Heather Duke, eventually. Heathers and Marthas sitting at a table together. Heaven on Earth. Checkmate, JD. MacNamara and Martha even dated until their second year of college. People stopped hating each other and it became beautiful.

Janis says that the same thing happened in her school. Her little jungle friend Cady broke the dance queen’s crown and shared it and told everyone they were beautiful. Now she’s braiding the former popular girl’s hair like it’s nothing. Everyone sits where they want and there’s no cliques or rumours or stupid bitchy girl fights. No one is afraid, all because one cute little mathlete made a speech. And yet for her school to get to that same kind of peace, she had to steal a scrunchie and four people had to die.

Outside the school fence, she finds an empty trash can, just like she hoped she would. She takes a look around the deserted street. No one’s around to see her. She’s completely alone and yet she still feels like all eyes are on her. Street lights glare down on her like an interrogation and she feels eyes on her back, even though she doesn’t see anyone when she turns around. She flips up the hood of her jacket, pulling it over her face.

She pulls the diary out of her pocket and drops it in the empty trash can, flinching at the sound it makes. It must be louder in her mind. Her shaking hand lifts out the matches. It takes longer than she would have liked to get them to light; her hands are trembling so badly she drops a few before she can get them to the matchbook, and others she can’t seem to strike hard enough.

The ground is littered with matches rolling in the light breeze when she finally gets one to work properly. The flame dances in front of her eyes, bright against the darkness of everything that surrounds her. She looks down at the diary, lying dead, almost invisible at the bottom of the trash can. It has every good memory of her time with JD, every time he made her laugh, every time he made her smile, details about what she felt when he kissed her. But it also has evidence and that’s a risk she can’t afford to take.

She lets the match fall from her hand and set the book ablaze.

“No!” she yells immediately after watching it start to burn. She presses her hands to her mouth because she knows that if she doesn’t do something she’ll reach in and try to grab it out.

She feels like she’s burning him. Like she’s seventeen again and back on the football field watching him explode, feeling her heart get torn apart while her soul and conscience are knitted back together. Simultaneously finding it hard to breathe and being able to for the first time in weeks. Saying goodbye to the worst and best thing to happen to her. She's burning every good memory she had of him and wonders if she'll forget if she doesn't have it to look back on. Does she even want to remember it now? Maybe she shouldn't, but she does. She wants to remember the good but also the bad. The bad reminds her why she keeps going and keeps fighting now.

She stays watching it, silently sobbing until the fire burns out and it’s nothing more but a pile of ash at the bottom.

Her clock reads 3:45am when she gets back into her room, climbing in through her window, nearly falling over the empty trash bag. As quietly as she can, she moves her TV back to where it was and takes the video out of it. She kneels next to the trashbag and fishes out the pack of photos. She had wanted to get rid of them, act like that year never happened. But she’s never going to forget him, no matter what she does. He’s burned into her mind whether she likes it or not.

She places the photos and videotape on her shelf and reties the bag. Maybe if that’s all she has of him, she can pretend he was something else.

After waking up at 11 the next morning and missing breakfast, Veronica decides to take Janis out for pancakes and coffee in town.

“Late night, Aunt V?” she asks, watching Veronica down another coffee.

“Yeah,” she admits, pushing her hair out of her eyes. She predicts she’ll crash out at 9pm at the latest tonight. “Just… looking through some old stuff. Kept me up.”

“Some old high school stuff?” Janis asks quietly, her shoulders hunching. She looks small and it doesn’t suit her. Ever since Janis could walk she’s been unapologetic about how loud she is and how much space she takes up. Even though the Regina incident knocked her down, all she did the next year was come back louder and bigger. She doesn’t look at Veronica, keeping her eyes on her half-constructed pancake house.

“Yeah,” she says. “I found some more stuff of when I was with JD.”

“Aunt Veronica, I’m really sorry,” she says. “That I brought him up. I know he can’t be easy to talk about.”

“Jan, it’s okay,” she assures her. “I’m actually, weirdly kind of glad you did. I just sort of needed that kind of release, I guess. I needed to remember him.” Janis nods, but the confusion is visible on her face. “It’s complicated.”

“Are you going to be okay?” she asks. Veronica smiles and takes her hand.

“I’ve been okay for the past 29 years, Jan,” she explains. “And besides, you don’t need to worry about me. It’s my job to worry about you. You’re the kid here.”

“I’m seventeen,” Janis corrects her. Veronica nods. Seventeen’s a fun age. She felt so grown up when it started and then everything happened and all she needed was someone to hold her.

“That’s not as old as you think it is,” she tells her. “Go be seventeen. Go do dumb stuff and don’t worry about me. Trust me, you’ll have plenty of time for all that later.”

“How do you know all that stuff?” she asks. “How do you know what to say?”

“Easy,” she answers, taking another sip of her coffee. “I just say what I wish adults had said to me at that age.”

#veronica sawyer #heathers the musical #janis sarkisian #mean girls broadway #not sure why im putting this here but its here now #fanfic #character study #i guess?#barrett made me do it #long post for ts

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junker-town · 7 years

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25 non-Warriors reasons to watch the NBA

There’s a lot more to enjoy about this league.

The Golden State Warriors are overwhelming favorites to win the 2018 NBA championship. The Warriors almost swept through the playoffs last year, and they arguably improved in the offseason. Meanwhile, we aren’t yet sure how much their top challengers improved.

Enough to truly test Golden State? Probably not.

Enough to make the season compelling? Absolutely.

In objection to the binary nature of sports commentary, we are going to completely ignore the Warriors in this preview piece, instead focusing on the 25 reasons you should be excited about the new NBA season even though the Warriors are going to win the title.

This is now a Warriors-free zone.

1. Russell Westbrook has superstar friends again. Westbrook went full Dr. Manhattan last season and was named MVP. It’s going to be fascinating to see how he adjusts to having Paul George and Carmelo Anthony alongside him. George isn’t near the offensive mastermind that Kevin Durant had been, and Carmelo has seemed to acknowledge his powers are waning, so Westbrook should still maintain majority control on that end. But George and Melo provide relief and secondary perimeter attacking points that OKC lacked a bit last season. George’s ace defense will help, too.

2. BOSSton. If you’re not giddy with anticipation to see what Brad Stevens does with Kyrie Irving and Gordon Hayward, something’s wrong. The Whiteboard Jordan helped Isaiah Thomas reach All-NBA status and made a weird, mismatched roster into art. What will he do with high-aesthetic players like dribble-master Irving and a smooth passer and scorer like Hayward? They might not be good enough to beat Cleveland, but it’s going to be fun to see them try.

Troy Taormina-USA TODAY Sports

3. H-Town. The Rockets, who were awesome last season, went and pulled Chris Paul out of a hat. CP3’s arrival will shift James Harden back to two-guard and give Houston one of the most powerful backcourt attacks in decades. Paul is known as a bit of an on-court control freak, whereas Harden is more a free spirit. Watching them feel each other out and find ways to maximize their abilities should be fascinating.

4. The Conscience Of The NBA. Gregg Popovich isn’t shutting up, and thank goodness. He offered a sermon on media day, and we can expect him to wax philosophical throughout the season. When has a coach’s media availability ever been appointment television? (Since we haven’t mentioned him yet, let’s throw a nod to Kawhi Leonard here. A masterful player who is completely mind-blowing to watch in action.)

5. You Must Be Yoking. Nikola Jokic was a revelation last season, and he’ll have the reins in Denver from Day 1 in 2017-18. With Gary Harris and Jamal Murray developing and a new co-star in Paul Millsap up front, it should only get prettier from here.

6. No More CP3s in L.A. The Chris Paul era in Los Angeles ended rather abruptly, meaning Blake Griffin is back in charge. The good news is that Griffin, when healthy, is a preternaturally gifted creator with the ball who should be able to keep feeding DeAndre Jordan lobs and open shooters clean looks. The bad news is that the best non-Warrior shooter in the business, J.J. Redick, is gone, too. But an unlocked, mature Griffin should be glorious to behold in any case.

7. Zo-Time. Let’s stay in L.A. for a minute and hang out with Lonzo Ball. Skepticism is understood: His jumper form is, uh, interesting and his pops is a menace to airwaves. We don’t know whether he’ll ever be an All-Star. But he will be fun. This is guaranteed. No one who watched his work at UCLA last season, or paid attention to Vegas Summer League, can deny this. If the Lakers cannot yet be good, at least perhaps they can be entertaining.

8. Milos Fever. Milos Teodosic, perhaps the most creative passer in Europe over the past several years, joined the Clippers this summer. It remains to be seen how much he’ll play given his defensive shortcomings and expected heavy roles for Patrick Beverley and Austin Rivers. But with a big target like Jordan running the floor, this could be a highlight reel in the making.

Photo by Vaughn Ridley/Getty Images

9. The Next Evolution of Giannis Antetokounmpo. Last season, Giannis really put everything together. He became an All-Star and perhaps the second- or third-best player in the Eastern Conference. (Once Jimmy Butler moved west, Giannis claimed that No. 2 spot.) He’s 22 years old. He’s nowhere near maximizing his potential. Giannis has become one of those players where you need to know if he’s playing any given night so you can be prepared to switch over on League Pass.

10. Stan Van Gundy Meltdown Watch. Something gnarly happened in Detroit last year. The Pistons were disappointing in total, but Van Gundy’s particular moves — paying Reggie Jackson and Andre Drummond, specifically — didn’t work out. If Detroit starts slow again, Van Gundy might flip into IDGAF mode as he did in his waning days in Orlando. While that’d be painful for Pistons fans, a mad Van Gundy is always a delight for neutral observers.

11. ROOKIES! We mentioned Lonzo already, but heavens there are some incredible first-year prospects in the pipeline. Among just the point guards we have Ball, Markelle Fultz, De’Aaron Fox, Dennis Smith Jr., and Frank Ntilikina. Jayson Tatum, Bogdan Bogdanovic and Lauri Markkanen looked awesome this summer. Josh Jackson, Jonathan Isaac, and Donovan Mitchell have high fun quotients. And let’s not even get into Kyle Kuzma ...

12. Keep Calm Like Porzingis. Having moved on from Phil Jackson and Carmelo Anthony for different reasons, the Knicks can finally commit to slowly building around Kristaps Porzingis. That’s a shift, and it will be interesting to see how Porzingis steps into the void. We still don’t know whether he’s a future All-Star or he’s a future Best Center in the League. This season will offer guidance.

13. Paul George has a superstar friend for the first time ever. Remember that PG-13 had the Pacers very competitive during the Heatles era with George Hill, Roy Hibbert, David West, and Lance Stephenson as his co-stars. Those were all plus players, and Indiana made its mark on defense, where the supporting cast excelled. But we have not seen George play with an All-Star caliber scorer outside of the weird Indy overlap with Danny Granger. Going from Jeff Teague to Russell Westbrook should be life-changing for PG-13.

14. LeBron. I mean, that’s really all that needs to be said. If LeBron is playing basketball, you should be watching.

Photo by Gregory Shamus/Getty Images

15. Peanut Butter and Jelly. LeBron lost Kyrie Irving, but he got reinforcements, too: Dwyane Wade signed with Cleveland in the middle of training camp after getting sprung from the Bulls. And their reunion is every bit as glorious from a Banana Boat perspective as you’d imagine! (The basketball perspective? We’ll wait and see.)

16. New Heatles. One of the most disappointing moments of the 2016-17 season was when the Miami Heat fell just a game short of making the playoffs after an incredible mid-season turnaround. Well, they are back. The front office retained the roster to great expense and added Kelly Olynyk. If they start the season like they finished the last one, the East had better watch out.

17. Kemba Walker. The Hornets’ watchability is directly correlated to how much Kemba is feeling himself in any given moment.

@KembaWalker ➡️ @DwightHoward #BuzzCity http://pic.twitter.com/agy4ESGlqH

— Charlotte Hornets (@hornets) October 9, 2017

18. The John Wall-Brad Beal Encore. The Wizards hit their stride last year thanks to health and camaraderie. Wall is deeply underrated as a passer and attacker; everyone knows Beal can shoot and scoot to the rim. The dual attack is really something.

19. Guards Galore! Speaking of which: The East is relatively weak compared to the West, especially at the team level. But holy smoke the East has some fantastic guards, from Kyrie and Isaiah Thomas to Kemba, Wall, Beal, Kyle Lowry, DeMar DeRozan, and Goran Dragic. If you like guard play, those early East games usually have something for you. (Just don’t watch the Knicks, Pacers, or Bulls.)

20. Isaiah Thomas might explode into flames. It’s a scientific fact: every time someone in a position of power doubts Isaiah, he gets stronger. That’s why he was so successful entering the league as the No. 60 pick. That’s why he became a 20-point scorer after coming off the bench behind Jimmer Fredette. That’s why he became an All-Star in Boston after the Suns pawned him off. And that’s why he’ll drop 50 in a game for Cleveland after Boston traded him. Provided his hip doesn’t keep him off the court too long, he’s going to be a maniac this season.

21. Boogie And The Brow. DeMarcus Cousins and Anthony Davis were thrown together with the Pelicans already in peril of missing the playoffs last year. Now they have a training camp together, plus Jrue Holiday and Boogie-whisperer Rajon Rondo in the backcourt. The Pels remain desperate for shooting, but the whole roster and organization is desperate enough to win — Davis and Cousins for their reputations, Alvin Gentry and Dell Demps for their jobs — that something magical is possible. And if something magical does not happen and the Pels disappoint ... well, that will be its own kind of magic, won’t it?

Photo by Jonathan Ferrey/Getty Images

22. Blaze On. Portland didn’t solve its major roster problems in the summer (hello Evan Turner), but Damian Lillard continues to set a high bar, C.J. McCollum continues to impress, and Jusuf Nurkic looks to be in shape and healthy in the preseason. I dare say the Blazers will be shockingly fun this year.

23. The Pack Survives. For the first time in more than a decade, the Timberwolves are going to be straight-up good. Adding Tom Thibodeau to a team led by Karl-Anthony Towns and Andrew Wiggins didn’t do the trick a year ago. Adding Jimmy Butler? That’ll do it. The Wolves’ Thibsian style of play may not be too aesthetically pleasing to the masses, but watching the growth of a future MVP like Towns, a manageable role for Wiggins, and a happy environment for Butler — that should be joyous in its own right. Minnesotans have suffered long enough. Go get ‘em, Wolves.

24 Brotherly Love. Perhaps the most intriguing, endearing, and exciting team to watch early this season will be the Philadelphia 76ers. They have two Rookie of the Year candidates, the two runners-up for Rookie of the Year last year, J.J. Redick, assorted other fun youngsters, and a coach with the most inexplicable accent in the nation. Most of all, they have Joel Hans Embiid, a damn good player molded for internet godliness. He’s funny, he’s brash, he’s completely self-aware. And we just might get more than 1,000 minutes of him on the court this season. It’s Embiid’s time. Treasure every second.

25. Revenge LeBron. Look, Kyrie requested a trade while playing under LeBron’s tutelage. Kyrie’s Cavaliers were winning 30 games a year before LeBron came back. And this is the thanks LeBron gets? Dude’s going to be mad when the Cavaliers line up across from the Celtics on opening night. Mad mad mad mad mad.

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