#first post from yours truly

[glittercake]

"we're going to put sam through the wringer" yall cant even put him in an episode of your silly little cartoon show.

#sam wilson #adding tags to say that before you reblog this ask yourself #am i truly upset about sam being erased from marvel bc i love his character #or am i a st*cky shipper who is bitter about peggy #if your answer is not the first this post isnt for you

[ash-and-starlight]

.

#siri how do i purge those fictional gay ppl from my mind QUICK!!!!! #watching a kdrama with friends & there’s a whole cheesy montage abt the first snow #and how ppl who like each other fall in love & will be together forever if they watch the first snow #now do you think i’m feeling normal about this? #do you think i’m doing okay? #when the first snow of the year 1355 fell when ouyang asked esen to come to bianliang with him??? #when esen’s death became truly inevitable?? and ouyang had snow in his hair?? #spc when i fucking gET YOU #that honey it’s 4 pm time for your cock&ball torture meme but it’s me @ myself opening a new canvas #send post

[jovenshires]

happy first day of spommy week!! come play spommy fic bingo with me :3

#spommy #shipping #rpf #personal #this is all for kicks n giggles. first person to get a bingo off a fic posted for spommy week gets a ficlet or video edit from yours truly. #haha jk unless? #spommyweek2024 #mine*

[aconstantache]

You're precious to me, Henry

#big brother uk #jenry #forgot how to post things on here omg why's it all different #anyway I LOVE THEM #bb 2023 was SO so so good i miss it immensely! #jordan - a v satisfing reality tv contestant #dry sardonic and miserable but truly experienced the full gammut of human emotion #*gamut #He was in a love triangle! he was in love with his best friend! he was evicted! he was locked in a prison cell! #he cam back from the dead! #his ice heart melted but also he had a heart all along!!! #ugh what a time! #otp: we're a symphony of velvets! #im sorry how can those be your first words to a person

[rithmeres]

yes, the plans that i could not share with you (because the haters would sabotage me) were that i was taking on LACC in my vash getup :)

i have so few pictures of myself but i got so many compliments (especially on my arm) and plenty of other people took pictures of me. and normally i don't like attention but i will be honest with u. under these circumstances i loved it. my arm held up really well through 8 hours on the convention floor and i have never been prouder of anything i've made. it's articulated incredibly well, no part of it gave out or required repair, it's never uncomfortable or a nuisance to wear, and i have enough range of motion to do relatively complex things like tying my shoes.

originally i was not planning to try to meet anyone famous because 1) it's expensive and 2) the lines are long and 3) i feel weird and annoying approaching literally anyone for any reason BUT. the spot where i met up with my sister just happened to be right next to johnny yong bosch's table. right when he started signing things. so i said LOL ok i'll do it.

it was super chill, i asked him how it felt to get the call that they wanted him to come back 20 years later for a trigun reboot and he said it almost didn't happen -- that since they recast everyone else for stampede they considered recasting vash as well (and i said WOW i'm so glad they didn't) and he said he really enjoyed getting to come back and explore a darker take (i forget if what he said was a darker take on vash's character, or just a darker trigun in general) but it was briefly surprising 2 me that he considered stampede to be a darker version but i get it, especially when u consider that there is not a lot of comedy in those 12 episodes to balance out the grief.

ANYWAY he was impressed with my arm and i asked him if he would sign my coat :) so he signed the lining but he was also like u know what, i'm gonna give you a second autograph just because. so he signed a print for me as well (free of charge!!) and the print with the blue signature matches my famous paintings that i always film in front of (that's providence baybee)

other stuff from the con under the cut

cosplay notes:

i saw 3 other vash cosplayers (a 98 vash, a stampede vash, and a purple coat vash) and no shade but i definitely had the best arm build. peace and love to all of them though

i saw 1 1/2 wolfwoods. 1 was the aforementioned mullet wolfwood from yesterday's post (ww if you’re out there ww) and the 1/2 was the 98 vash cosplayer’s gf in some kind of goth-ish dress and she was carrying a punisher

mullet wolfwood if you're out there i regret not getting a picture with you so much. i am deeply ashamed and i have no excuse because i ran into you twice and both times i was too embarrassed to ask for a picture. i just want you to know that your punisher was swag and your earrings were yolo and we would look very good together

i expected to see a lot more trigun tbh. los angeles where u at. 4 vashies at a convention of 120,000+ people is nothing. one guy even walked up to me like wow i love ur vash, i haven't seen a lot of trigun at this con and i was like I KNOW i thought i'd see a lot more

theeeee costume of all time award goes to the cad bane cosplayer i saw on the balcony. spare hand in marriage dude (gn) you looked so good

second place for costume of all time goes to the other mother cosplayer who had button eyes and these crazy finger appendages and never once broke character even while waiting in lines

i took 100 points of psychic damage from this one guy who (and im not kidding) was at least 6’4’’ and wearing platform boots and was dressed as the mfing onceler. with the stupid top hat he was fr 7+ feet tall (i saw him duck to get through a doorway).

someone was there as the brawny paper towel guy?? just walking around in a beard and flannel carrying a pack of paper towel rolls?? go off king

i saw 5 nightwing cosplayers but only 2 were biblically accurate (had ass)

the nanami sweep at this convention was so real u all SHOWED UP. and everybody ate. i saw at least 12 nanamis and not one of them was a flop.

i have never seen so many spider-mans in my life

other things:

fig. 1: this extremely hot captain america on a very large poster was about 2 make me act unwise. hi gorjus................................. nice eyebrows

fig 2: i saw this sign a couple blocks away from the con and i did a triple take. 🔥🔥🔥TRIMAX MENTIONED🔥🔥🔥

fig. 3: i saw all 4 hobbits in panel and can confirm elijah wood’s laugh is ten times more infectious in real life. before they were even done sitting down, dominic monaghan switched around all of their name cards so that none of them were seated behind the right name. as u might imagine much of the panel's content was reminiscing about LOTR, but i heard some stories that i hadn't heard before. they also talked about video games, other projects they are working/have worked on, how their kids feel about their dads' LOTR roles, how much they love ian mckellen, and how they would love to see something happen for the 20th anniversary of ROTK this year. sean astin (the legend) took shots at the stranger things writers (basically said joyce could never be happy with hopper) AND EVERYONE CLAPPED LOL. billy and dom talked about the best food in NZ, their show billy and dom eat the world, and the unfortunate events that led to the friendship onion's hiatus. it was a ton of fun to just watch them be themselves with each other, you can tell that these guys are all so fond of each other and love each other so much.

and finally, fig. 4: i bought these beautiful prints from @/batinyourbelfry and the skeletal washi tape from @/skeletalacademia (both on IG)

#this post is all over the place but i want u all to experience this with me. baby's first convention #i didn't hate it like i thought i might but i am absolutely WIPED and will b perfectly content to not go to another con for several years #lacc #los angeles comic con #it's so funny walking around and just hearing someone go VASH and literally being like. who said that. #like there are 5 million people in this corridor. where are u so i can acknowledge you #my immediate defense mechanism is to toss up a peace sign so it's very convenient that it is something in character for vash #my favorite compliment was this one guy who was just like 'THAT'S FUCKIN SICK' from across the aisle and i was like 'YEAH!!!!' #long post #ackchewally the more i think about it. i do think sometimes people mischaracterize stampede as lighter than the other triguns #simply because the characters look more baby than their other counterparts #even though many elements of stampede are. truly so dark. #like we are not at manga-level-dark yet but HOO BOY i have no doubt we will get there #i'm dying to see what other horrors orange is cooking bc i KNOW they're cooking awful manga things (laudatory) #hot single dads in your area #my cosplay #this post has taken me hours to write. im so sick of it at this point begone from my sight i hate u

[kismetmoon]

"You are now one of our thousands of souls, we've taken and lifted above. You are ours, and we are yours".

[Plain text ID: a digital drawing of Bill Cipher in his pyramid form from Gravity Falls and an original Flatland / Gravity Falls crossover character, The Mosaic, in its isosceles form.

Bill is depicted as a large red pyramid with his topmost section disconnected from the rest of his body. This section contains a black eye with a glowing yellow pupil and four eyelashes on his upper and lower eyelid at the center of each side. He also has a glowing yellow top hat above his upper point. Below his topmost section is his middle section, which has yellow glowing teeth and a single black tongue on the top edges, black brick outlines all over the surface and a yellow glowing bow tie at the front center.

The Mosaic is a large isosceles triangle with arms, clawed hands, legs and a single large red glowing eye with a white outline in it’s center. It’s entire being is made up from various black shapes and lines - both regular and irregular.

The Mosaic is on the right in the background - looking down at Bill with one clawed hand reached out towards him, while it’s other hand goes off-screen. Bill is in the bottom left corner of the photo, looking up towards The Mosaic, his body bent slightly towards the left. He has a slightly strained expression, while the Mosaic has a blank expression.

The background is dark with grey looming clouds behind The Mosaic and graduates from dark to light grey (going top to bottom). The entire image has a noticeable red tint.

End ID.]

#this ​is the line from Taurnado that truly inspired The Mosaic btw #bc ​i always interpreted that last line as 'you are our victim now as we were your victims' ough #first ​time properly posting bill here and he's shitting bricks #exactly how i wanted this to go 😌 #gravity falls #bill cipher #flatland #oc #the mosaic #also hc that pyramid bill is about 30ft tall #and decided to make the mosaic 1600ft tall :) #‘woke up and chose 2069.7 feet 😹😹🥱🥱🥱🥵🥵’ type beat #ty to rjalker for formatting the id !! #📎

[yeonban]

I might be ~quirky~ for this (welcome to my twisted mind and etc) but I genuinely have so much fun with shipping nowadays, ever since I chose to be singleship for each muse. I feel like my adhd has never allowed me to pour even half as much care and attention into a ship as I'd have loved to when I had multiple ones at the same time per muse, so being able to focus on a single romantic dynamic per muse really feels like a weight off my shoulders

#* ooc. / posts. #I also know my adhd is all over the place so at times I may go a few months w/o bringing that specific muse (and thus ship) up #(unless you approach me in dms; in which case my mind typically instantly goes !!! on the muse & ship) #so I'm INCREDIBLY touched whenever my ship partners agree to be singleship w me. It's truly such an honor and blessing to me #and I feel like it's much easier for my muse to get very attached when their romantic attention only goes to a single person; #so you can best believe that from the moment we start shipping your portrayal will ALWAYS. and I mean /ALWAYS/ be intertwined with mine #doesn't matter if you drop the muse or leave tumblr or stop writing altogether. your muse will Always be my muse's special someone #I've had tons of ships where my partner disappeared off the face of the earth one day and yet all I've done was change 'singleship' #to 'noship' bc my muse's heart to this day (several irl years later) continues to be with their portrayal; REFUSING to look at anyone else #Granted this is also why I'm so picky with shipping; in the sense that I let my muse lead the way til they fall in love #and only THEN do I ask the mun if they're fine w our muses being a thing (and thus being singleship w me) #I used to say yes to people just asking to ship and while I know that's a neat option too; I simply. Cannot do that these days ADGHSAJDSDK #nothing against anyone nor against that route; but I've had a good share of ships that crumbled or made me lose muse bc my muse wasn't #feeling the ship. so I'm no longer going ahead unless the muse falls first and makes ME start shipping it rather than the other way around #and that decision has unironically made me feel so light and comfortable here AHDSAJDSKDJ #AH NEY WAYZ!! I need to be sedated bc why am I awake at 11 am. I HAVE NOT SLEPT.

[crescentfool]

beaming everyone on the dashh with good brain day vibes!!! i hope that you all can remember to extend self-compassion to yourself whenever you're feeling down about something 💙

#lizzy speaks #the human brain works in such profound ways i think #lately i've been thinking about that post that was like 'you will always be your oldest friend take care of yourself' #it's definitely a sentiment i agree with and i appreciate how it emphasizes the importance of extending compassion to yourself #you wouldn't say such hurtful things to your friends right? (or at least i'd hope so) #so why would you say it to yourself? #you are your own friend too. and i think everyone has a beautiful soul within themselves. nurture it! water it! feed it good thoughts. #basically i wish everyone a 'i hope that your brain is not your own enemy but rather a friend that you can find comfort in' #things will work themselves out with time. there's beauty in life and you will find small delights to cherish!! i am manifesting it for u!! #and for those who find it difficult to transition from a self-critical mindset to one that's more compassionate and nonjudgmental #i truly think that with time you will be able to rewire your brain to be kinder to yourself. i'm proud of you for taking any first steps :) #there are times in which it feels counterintuitive to go against habits that feel hard-wired... but brains are very malleable littel guys- #with such a wonderful capacity for changing and learning new things. so i hope everyone can learn to be their own best friend! #not to undermine the importance of a support network ofc. that's good too and im all for that!! but i hope everyone remembers to be kind- #not only to others but also to themselves!! you're going to do great out there!! i love you all!! #ive just been thinking about this a lot... i needed to get it out there. you all shine so brightly!!! we shall be fine!!! have a good week! #sorry if this is out of nowhere but if there's anything about me you should know it's that i'm the 'hey dont cry 8 billion people on earth- #ok?' post. idk i just find great joy in knowing others are out there thriving and finding a daily delight yknow i love humanity!!

[oneiricazalea]

Happy 5th birthday to my dear OC, Sei ♥

#my art #illustration #original character #oc | seijaku #world | luxenvalice #sentimental rambling in the tags #my dearest girl!! light of my life!! the only reason i get out of bed sometimes!!!! #she was drawn earlier than Feb 14 2019 - but that is the date she was first posted to ToyHouse #and so that is the date she was probably truly solidified in my mind as an OC that was going to stay #Do you ever have an OC and don't realize how much of you - the creator - is in that OC? #realizing stupidly late that this is why it bothered me immensely when people took art involving her to repost #I still feel kinda gross posting personal art because of it but #that's why my watermark is a little more annoying now #Anyway it feels like a lifetime has passed from her starting off as a BNHA OC #Don't remember anymore why I made the conscious decision to watch the show when I always had and still have trouble starting/finishing medi #but while I don't keep up with it anymore - it did result in me creating her #first as a student character and then changing her immediately when I saw a certain villain loool #there was a lot more I was going to say down here but the internet has cut out #So for now I'll just end with... #thanks for your time if you read this 💕 #and I look forward to doing more with this character in Genshin and other fandoms #and ofc the collab story she is involved in 😌

[exlimix1a]

Hey Hey hey hgey hey guys. have you heard that sheezy.art is coming back

#HONEST TO GOD I REALLY REAAALLAY WOULD BE STOKED TO BE ON SHEEZY WITH ALL OF YOU!! #idk how many people who follow me know what sheezy art is #but its a website that was an homage to the original sheezyart that i was never on bc it was before my time #but its an art sharing platform that ran from 2020 to 2022 (when it started popping off as a bunch of artists began to share it and also #when i joined the website) #but shortly after the devs decided to close it bc they were all college students and the website was exploding faster than they could keep #p #but after some time. they have graduated #and they missed sheezy so much #that theyre bringing it back and wanting to dedicate their careers to it #Sheezy was legitimately the first website i ever truly felt excited to post my work to #You would get people liking your work and you could see other people's work and it was so friendly and beautiful and customizable #like an art sharing website would be #and i was sooo heartbroken to have it shut down but ofc i was happy for the devs for setting that boundary and leaving when they had to!! #but im SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO EXCITED FOR IT TO BE BACK #legitimately i promise you the community is better than any art site ive ever been on since then #the discord for it has opened again and in late November the website will open again #first in beta for the people who already had accounts when it closed but then itll open for new folks #oh im so fucking excited #and i want you guys to be excited too!!!!! #im so stoked #i love you guys ok #mwah ah

[its-tortle]

it wasn't a hate speech, I wrote about it, I'm sorry that something offended you.

ok, I'm bad at writing. try again. short version - why of all social things its a transgender people? you write (I wrote same) you have no self-interest other than equality. You write about Ukraine one time, you write about Israel one time. You know what I mean?

I mean, you like Taylor - you post about Taylor a lot. You post cute gay couple a lot - because you love it. And from social - you post a lot about trans. Only trans you post a lot.. More than about women rights or bisexual people. Why? :-) You are a woman, you are young, you have your own life, friends. Why you dont speak about this.

I'm asking this because I don't know any trans people in real life (like you as I know) other than tiktok, yt. but I know people of all orientations. my governem doesnt have enough money for education and medicine. I mean that everyone simply has problems. but you write about them. I don't have a problem with them, and neither do you.

I just don’t understand why so many posts on tumblr about trans rights, especially from people who are not in the trans community at all. So yeah, the short question - why trans?

(you don't have to reblog at all about anything, but you reglog about trans. and yeah, if its a post about hp you only write on tags jkr on negative part)

hi! sorry it took me a moment to get to this, and sorry that i misunderstood your ask in the first place. it's a valid question, truly, though i'm not sure i alone am able to give you a full answer for it.

there's definitely a number of reasons as to why trans issues seem to be disproportionately represented on my blog and many others, some of those reasons are personal and some of them sociopolitical.

the first and maybe most obvious personal reason is the simple one of queer solidarity. i'm bi, i've dated women, and that makes me part of a larger group that is as diverse and colorful as it is littered with a history of prosecution. trans people are very much a part of that collective, and i want them to feel as supported as they have made me feel when i've met them at gsas and pride events and fandom spaces. while i don't relate to their issues exactly, their overall struggle against the cis heterosexual matrix still connects with me. we're all under one umbrella.

also (and maybe this is where a bit of the sociopolitics comes in) trans people are one of the most immediately and publicly threatened groups within the lgbtq+. while so many other sexualities and identities are obviously affected by current events and politics, the queer hate spread in right-wing politics these days is specifically anti-trans. i'm half american and have grown up in western europe, and the impact of this hate mongering is felt in my own communities. while i know most about us and some uk anti-trans politics, i know the sentiment is more widespread than just those places. it feels like one of the most urgent queer issues right now.

and because i am queer and because i am western, the algorithm and the news and the people i follow on social media are posting about this anti-trans rhetoric. i don't think i ever deliberately seek out trans supportive content, but it's what i see on my feed/dash, so that's what i reblog. if i saw as much disability support or ukraine support, etc., i would reblog that too.

sure, there are things that i don't reblog that i maybe should, but again, i'm not here to be an activist and i don't like reblogging content about issues i'm not fully sure/educated about. the palestine/israel issue, for instance, is so much more complex than 'trans people deserve to exist', so i'm not as comfortable hitting a quick reblog. not because i don't care about it or because it's not on my mind, but because it's not as black and white and i don't feel like a worthy informant. i talk to my friends and my parents about it, but i don't need my incomplete opinions to be posted publicly online.

and i know i keep saying this, but i'll say it again: i am not here to be an activist. there is a definitely a conversation to be had here, and maybe i should be doing more, but i also resent being made to feel like i have to weigh in on every world issue because my silly little blog about queer tv shows and taylor swift has 1k followers. i reblog what resonates with me, i reblog what i understand. i want this blog to be a happy place.

#i also truly cannot remember the last pro trans post i reblogged #i know i have rbed them!! but is it that much of a trend?? it's not that evident to me #anyway i hope this makes sense #i sympathize with you and think this is a good conversation #but i hope you see where i'm coming from #i also hope you're not a terf or anything if you are pls unfollow me thank you :) #anyway thanks for taking the time to rephrase and type all this out! #i see u and i appreciate the effort #especially as it's not your first language #tortle answers #i wonder if literally anyone else is following this exchange #anon

[the-acid-pear]

I never tried the option myself bc it'd probably mean skipping the Reason You Suck speech at the end (fire for speedrunners though) but I Love that you can frame your Phoneys in 3, especially so if you've already killed the previous two. Like yeah couldn't send you off to die so i'll let the goverment do it for me 🧸 like its just Peak evil imo.

#luly talks #i do relinquish in the pain and the agony but dont get me wrong the thought of any of them 3 getting jailed makes me SO sad #rog esp since he's the one im writing about and the biggest nerve wreck #gingi voice they'll be the last one to pick the board game for prison-game-night.......... #actually yknow i wonder if rog would end up almost believing it after all when you try to gaslight him for the shits and giggles #(as in: telling HE was victim of the bite of 87 and the like) he tells you to not do that bc his brain is already scrambled or something #so there's a chance perhaps he'd believe it if he had everyone constantly accussing him of it? #not like it'd matter much i have no hopes for the dsaf justice system i know its been 35 years since jack got framed but still #i just remembered when the option popped up i said ''god im really becoming steven 😭'' #first time i made the joke too was when i said ''imagine your boss sucks so bad you turn suicidal'' no clue what the context was #OH YEAH JAKE SAYING HE'D RATHER FUCKING DIE THAN KEEP WORKING HERE yeah. poor guy. #anyway im derailing my own post again uhhh. yeah. yeah i dont trust any phoney is avoiding the death sentence #dsaf #roger jones #dsaf roger #btw just for the sake of yapping longer i truly cant decide whether harry or jake would survive better in the enviroment #probably jake to be honest. I mean Harry has a lot of experience inside freddy's but he didnt really live outside it muhc #jake is so confrontational though #hey did you guys watch the hit movie felon? sure that guy wasn't framed but. i feel like jake would end up w that attitude #except for. you know. everything else that happens in the hit movie felon. #hey actually forget about this game go watch the 10/10 movie Felon from 2008 starring Val Kilmer and Stephen Dorff #because its one of my all time fave movies and probably the saddest i've seen #not bc there arent movies that are more tragic but bc no movie was able to break thru my walls of idgaf and make me cry anyway #yeah you thought i couldnt bring up my movie fixations on my different fandom posts well you were WRONG in fact #im gonna go tag my other post i left untagged yesterday bc my ass was Cooking

[carlyraejepsans]

Do you think Sans coming from another world could explain why he has such low stats? I mean, he's clearly not ACTUALLY that weak, he survives a high damaging move for a few seconds, and seems pretty fit since he's dodging all of your attacks, not to mention his damage is nuts, maybe its just that his body is phyisically different than other monsters cause he's from deltarune where they have physical bodies, and so whenever you check him, it's like a glitch, and doesn't show his stats correctly cause its like trying to play an xbox game on playstation, its just different hardware so it cant read it or display it correctly or something.

talking about the otherworld theory is a double edged weapon because on one hand it's brought it back to the attention of a lot of people and it's good because it's legit one of the most solid utdr theories out there. on the other hand I've spoiled like 99% of the things i wanted to do with my comic :']

#you know.... the one i only posted the first part of...... the one i was supposed to continue working one months ago.... #LONG STORY SHORT. I DON'T KNOW IF IT WAS INTENTIONAL. it's definitely possible though it contrasts with the theory #that the ingame ''stats'' are just chara guesstimating for us #but if you want to view it from a headcanon pov then definitely #i think monster stats are attuned to their magic and sans just isn't MADE OF magic #not like the monsters in undertale. he's more similar to a ut human in that sense #as in he's fully corporeal. so his magic is also more similar to humans' which isn't an 'expression of your nature' like it is for monsters #it's just something you Do. from practice. and likely draw magic from outside of yourself #so if you were to check his stats assuming it's magic you'd obviously come up short #and he DOES beat your ass with an attack named after someone else after all #but mind you this is me making headcanons this isn't truly a theory #undertale #answered asks #otherworld theory #sans

[vzajemnik]

good morning still thinking about clive still wanting to kill myself very badly how are we doing.

#🗞️ #aaoughgoaoaoagahagghh cliveeeeeeee #no truly ive hated him since my first maurice watch and ive watched this movie like 10 times over the years #and then youre a bitter 20-something and you watch ur fav movie and realise that youre one step away from becoming him. head in hands #like idk something about watching this movie in my teenage years when i was hopeful and proud and open to now where im just #scared and tired and all that. myyyyy god #i hate those posts that go around being like ohhh your 13 year old self would be so proud of you!!!! no he wouldnt. NO HE WOULDNT!!!!! #okay thats all. gonna dig myself a hole in the ground and lay in it for the rest of eternity

[rosicheeks]

Unfortunately relatable. I grew up in the church and have a lot of Christian trauma from that. I show up for special occasions for my parents… sometimes. But it’s uncomfortable from the moment I step through the door. Bigoted pastor, the self-righteousness disguising the prejudice, the political comments from the altar. Shots at young people left right and center as if the hell on earth wasn’t caused by the same older generation 90% of the congregation belongs to..

I miss being young in the choir and the youth groups and not struggling with it. It’s wild to look back at the younger version of me who was unshakeable in his faith and honestly just saddening.

I was texting my sister today about it and she said

“I 100% think ALL of us have a ton of religious trauma and everyone else in the family just doesn’t realize it cause they’re still drinking the kool-aid.”

I ran out of tag room and didn’t want to delete any 😭 seriously not lying I could write a book about all my thoughts and experiences

#I relate to all of this so much #and it’s so sad how many people truly have religious trauma #I still find myself lucky and privileged cause I know there are stories MUCH worse than mine #it’s really hard cause my parents still think I’m a Christian #honestly at this point I have no clue what i am #even if I end up still being a Christian that doesn’t help or heal all of the years of church trauma #but the hard part is still acting the part for my parents #growing up I always tried to fit into the good Christian girl mold #cause I know that’s what my parents wanted and I didn’t want to disappoint them #but once I started smoking weed and they found out? it went all downhill from there #their perfect angel fell from heaven #and I feel like ever since I haven’t been really their daughter…. I’ve just been living on the outside looking in to everything #it hurts looking back at all the years I spent brainwashed into believing that was the ONLY faith #it genuinely makes me sick to my stomach thinking about the fact that I went to a pro life rally #the thing I was talking to my sister about was how mental health was never talked about in the church #when I started dealing with it and went to my parents or the pastors or any adult really and told them what I was dealing with #wanna know what the first thing they would ALWAYS say? well have you prayed about it? the way they treated mental illness was that it was #YOUR fault cause God is punishing you for something…. that you need to pray or go to church so then God will eventually take it away #and the thing is I don’t necessarily blame my parents (which kinda sucks cause I want to blame someone) #but honestly it’s just the environment they grew up in too… like I’m 99% sure my dad has dealt with depression his entire life #but won’t get diagnosed or anything cause they always believe faith has something to do with it #which makes me incredibly sad cause I just think about how much my dad has suffered and how he didn’t need to #^^ I was typing this out when I was late to my family gathering hahaha but then I think my sister called or something so I had to stop #sorry this post is all over the place - I swear I could write a book about religious trauma #yesterday went ok surprisingly but today? TODAY is going to be so much worse #sure I’ll make a post about it later but I guessssss I should go to bed now? it’s 2am and I have to get up at 5:45 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃 #and I have a fuuuuull day of fun Christian festivities while I’m dealing with all of this bottled up and unresolved crap from my past #please don’t get me wrong I love my parents and like I said I don’t blame them - they did their best #it just really sucks wondering what my life would have been like if I didn’t grow up in the church or in a super religious family #I wonder if when I told my parents I was depressed if they would have instantly brought me in to get help

[lorillee]

some girlies really will just say whatever on your posts huh

#???????????????????????????? sorry somebody commented on one of my posts with this hc #that edgeworth always needed glasses and manfred just simply refused to let him have them because it would mean hes not perfect #but . two comments. 1) kind of hard to be perfect if you cant see 2 feet in front of your own face #2) if its truly that big of a deal then like couldnt he just get eye surgery. the von karmas are loaded they can afford it #also 3) dont put your bad fanon von karma-edgeworth family whump onto my posts please #sigh. whatever #the correct first reaction to miles' post timeskip design should be ''woagh !!!!! he has glasses !!!!!!!!!!!! just like his dad !!!!!!!!!'' #and you notice this in combination with the fact that he is. notably. still wearing the jabot #because yada yada yada miles is the legacy of both his fathers but also distinct from them #and has taken what hes learned from them but also applied it in his own way for what he believes in #and the glasses & jabot combination is a visual representation of this #and so on and so forth i already talked about this for four thousand words you dont need to hear it again #but like still the point remains. ace attorney fanon reading comprehension on the von karma-edgeworth family soap remains #ZERO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!