#genuinely thank y'all for indulging me

[lookedlikethebins]

oh i LOVE the list of your wips and am super excited for literally all of them

ahhh!!! thank you!!!! that makes me feel really excited for (hopefully 🤞🏻) this weekend & being able to get some solid writing in!

with chapter 2 of be my god and country growing and growing every time I went to revise (and then my jobs getting super busy and requiring sooo much gd overtime after I posted lol) my wip backlog expanded... but now i'm ready to start finishing and posting them!!

i'm very thankful and grateful for how kind and encouraging everyone is here. it makes/keeps writing fic fun. so huge thank you to YOU xo 💌

#GENUINELY thank you everyone who has been asking about my wips or liking my rambling posts #and also huge shout out to my mutuals and friends that are being lovely and cheering me on and indulging the Visions 🩷🩷🩷 #y'all are wonderful #answered #asks

[rafesapologist]

the set up — rafe cameron; part seventeen

𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆: you've been one of the pogues since childhood, and your loyalty has always lied within your friend group, who is practically your family. when a threat by the name of rafe cameron begins to threaten the pogue's plans, they assign you to gain the trust of the dubious kook and keep an eye on what he's up to. however, now it's been six months since your friends set you up to spy on the kook prince himself, but what you didn't anticipate was to fall head over heels for the boy. your relationship had soon become inviolable shortly after your guys' first exchanges, much to your friends' dismay, and you two became practically inseperable. that was, until rafe discovers the truth.

warnings: angst, swearing, drug use, emotional outbursts, reckless rafe, mentions of substance abuse

author's note: Y'ALL let me clear up some confusion on the last chapter!! please note that rafe and y/n are on a break (no not in a ross and rachel type of way) so i promise the plot line is not that y/n cheated don't stone me OK anyways please enjoy dont hate me i promise im not here to dissapoint u all xoxo

The cozy afternoon sunlight streamed through the windows of the chateau, casting a warm glow over the living room. JJ and you found yourselves immersed in the absurd drama of a mindless reality TV show, sharing laughter and lighthearted banter.

As the ridiculous antics of the show unfolded on the screen, your legs were comfortably propped up on JJ's lap. He sat beside you on the couch, a bag of M&M's resting between the two of you. The crinkling sound of the candy bag echoed in the room as you both indulged in the colorful treats.

With each shared chuckle, you felt a sense of normalcy and comfort in the midst of recent chaos. The camaraderie between you and JJ, the simple joy of laughter, and the sweet companionship made that quiet afternoon a welcomed respite from the challenges you both faced.

During the commercial break, you turned to JJ, your eyes meeting in the dim glow of the living room. The TV cast a soft flicker across your faces as you gathered the courage to broach the subject.

"Hey, JJ," you began, "I was thinking, with everything going on and me recovering, do you mind covering my shifts at the golf course for a while?"

JJ met your gaze with a warm smile. "Sure thing, Y/N. I've always wanted to be a bev cart guy." You chuckled at his response, appreciating the lighthearted moment amidst the challenges you were facing.

JJ couldn't help but feel a warm sense of satisfaction as he watched you laugh. The dim light of the TV reflected in your eyes, accentuating the joy that danced within them. The dimples that formed on the sides of your mouth made the moment even more enchanting for him.

In that lighthearted exchange, as laughter echoed in the chateau's living room, JJ felt a growing connection with you. It was a simple moment, but the intimacy of sharing laughter brought a sense of comfort and pleasure, making it a memory he cherished.

JJ cleared his throat, realizing the shift in the atmosphere after his lighthearted joke. He tried to regain composure by placing his hand on your thigh, attempting a casual move, but the unintended tension in the air made the situation awkward.

"Yeah, um," you responded, sitting up straighter as an awkward cough escaped. The playful moment took an unexpected turn, leaving a subtle discomfort that lingered between you and JJ, "thank you for doing this for me. You've made this process a lot easier." Your gaze remained on your lap, not wanting to acknowledge the longing look in JJ's eyes.

JJ nodded, understanding the gravity of the situation. "Of course, Y/N. Anything for you," he replied, a genuine warmth in his voice. The acknowledgment of your appreciation made the air a bit lighter, but the unspoken tension still hung in the room.

JJ got up from the couch, stretching slightly. "Well, time to hit the golf course. Gotta keep those beverage carts in check, you know?" he said with a playful grin. You nodded, appreciating the levity he brought to the situation. "I'll be back later. Take it easy, okay?" JJ added, his eyes reflecting concern for your well-being.

JJ returned, the fabric of his golf course uniform emphasizing his athletic build. He flashed a charming smile at you, his dimples deepening as he leaned down to place a gentle kiss on the top of your head. "I'll be back before you know it. Remember, call me if you need anything," he reassured you, his words carrying a genuine warmth that lingered in the air after he left.

"Thanks Jay." You flashed him a weak smile, a subtle hum in your response.

With a soft smile and a parting "Course," JJ headed out, leaving you to relax in the comfort of the chateau. The door closed with a gentle click, and you settled into the solitude, thoughts swirling as you contemplated the recent events and the uncertain path ahead.

-

Meanwhile, at the golf course, Rafe was trying to find some semblance of normalcy in the routine of hitting golf balls. Topper and Kelce joined him, bantering about their day and cracking jokes as they took turns at the driving range. The rhythmic thud of the golf balls echoed in the air, providing a temporary distraction for Rafe's restless mind.

Suddenly, Topper spoke up, snapping Rafe out of his focus on his swing, "No shit. Looks like Maybank is tagging in for your girl's job today."

Rafe looked up, somewhat surprised by the mention of your name. "Yeah, apparently," he replied, trying to sound nonchalant despite the mix of emotions swirling within him. "She's probably taking some time off or something." The casual tone of his voice masked the turmoil he felt at the thought of you needing time away, especially after the events that transpired.

Topper chuckled, nudging Rafe with his elbow. "Guess you'll be seeing a lot more of her then, huh? Playing the knight in shining armor while she's on the mend?"

Rafe tried to shrug it off, taking another swing at the golf ball. "Just covering a shift, man. No big deal."

Kelce joined in, smirking. "Sure, Rafe, just a shift. We all know how protective you get when it comes to her."

Rafe's jaw tightened, a mix of irritation and guilt coursing through him. He tried to maintain his composure, hiding the internal struggle he was facing.

"Yeah, whatever," Rafe replied with a dismissive tone, forcing a nonchalant smirk. Despite his attempts to act unfazed, the mention of you stirred a swirl of conflicting emotions within him.

As they continued hitting balls, Rafe couldn't shake off the thought of you. He wondered what you were doing, how you were feeling. The weight of guilt lingered as he tried to focus on the golf game, his mind drifting back to the events that led to your hospitalization.

Topper chuckled, glancing at Rafe. "Maybe we should call over your new replacement. What do you think, Rafe?" he teased.

Rafe's grip on the golf club tightened, his jaw clenching for a moment. He shot a glare at Topper, his attempt at maintaining composure waning. "Shut up, Topper. Just focus on your swing."

Topper smirked, nudging Rafe with his elbow. "Come on, man. Let's call over the 'new bev cart girl' and see how well he handles the job."

Rafe shot Topper a sharp look, irritation evident in his eyes. "Leave it, Topper."

Kelce, sensing the tension, chimed in, "Alright, alright, no need to get all worked up."

Topper couldn't resist pushing further, calling out to JJ in a mocking tone, "Hey, Maybank! We heard you're taking over Y/N's job today. Guess you'll be delivering drinks and flirting with the kooks too."

JJ, annoyed by the insinuation, rolled his eyes and approached the group. "Give it a rest, Topper. Just trying to cover Y/N's shifts while she's recovering."

Topper chuckled, making a snarky comment, "Recovering, huh? Must've been a wild night for you two."

JJ's jaw tensed, his eyes narrowing at Topper. "Mind your own damn business, Topper. Y/N and I are just friends."

"Friends who share a lot of secrets, I bet," Topper teased, clearly enjoying getting under JJ's skin.

JJ couldn't hold back his irritation any longer. "You know, Topper, maybe if you focused on your swing as much as you focus on everyone else's business, you'd actually improve."

Rafe chuckled at JJ's retort, finding some amusement in the banter. The tension between them remained, but for now, the golf course banter served as a distraction from the more complicated emotions lingering beneath the surface.

Kelce stepped forward, shooting a warning look at Topper. "Dude, chill. Back off a bit."

JJ chuckled, enjoying the humor of the situation. He waved off the situation, deciding it was better to walk away than engage further. As he strolled away from the group, he couldn't help but notice the lingering tension, especially from Rafe.

As JJ walked away, the golf course seemed to echo with the tension between Rafe, Topper, and Kelce. Rafe's gaze lingered on JJ's retreating figure, frustration bubbling beneath the surface. The crisp sound of golf balls hitting the grass around them served as a stark contrast to the simmering emotions among the group.

Topper wore a mischievous grin, clearly reveling in the opportunity to stir the pot. He leaned in, taunting Rafe with remarks about JJ and you, trying to get a rise out of him. Kelce, sensing the tension, urged Topper to back off, but the damage was done.

Rafe's clenched fists betrayed the storm of jealousy raging inside him. The idea of someone else taking care of you when he believed it should have been him was a bitter pill to swallow. The golf course, once a place of leisure, now became a battleground for unresolved emotions and unspoken desires.

Rafe's temper boiled over like an erupting volcano. He flung his golf club with unrestrained force, the metal clattering as it hit the ground. In that explosive moment, his frustration and jealousy manifested in that single, violent action. Without a word, he stormed off the course, his steps heavy and purposeful, leaving behind a stunned Topper and Kelce.

The intensity of his reaction lingered in the air, a palpable tension that echoed through the golf course. Rafe's car door slammed shut, a resounding punctuation mark to the scene he left behind. The once serene atmosphere of the golf course now carried the weight of unspoken emotions and the consequences of a jealousy-fueled outburst.

"Fuck!" Rafe's voice exploded in a torrent of frustration as he hurled his golf club away, the metallic clatter blending with the ambient sounds of the golf course. In a seething rage, he stormed off the course, each step a declaration of his boiling anger. Reaching his car, he slammed the door shut and unleashed another curse, pounding his fist against the steering wheel. "Damn it!"

The air in the car became thick with tension as Rafe's frustration reached its peak. His knuckles turned white as he clenched the steering wheel, the metal groaning under the force of his grip. His breaths were heavy, each exhale carrying a hint of desperation and torment. The dimly lit interior of the car bore witness to the storm raging within him, the dashboard reflecting the twisted expressions that crossed his face – a turbulent sea of regret, jealousy, and self-loathing. In that moment, the weight of his actions pressed down on him like an unbearable burden, and tears streamed down his face, marking the depth of his turmoil.

The sounds of Rafe's anguished sobs reverberated through the confined space of the car, echoing the depths of his despair. His shoulders shook with the weight of his emotions as he laid his head on the steering wheel, seeking solace in the cold touch of the metal. Each sob was a painful admission of the havoc he had wreaked on his own life, a symphony of regret and sorrow that painted the interior of the car in the hues of his torment. The glow of the dashboard served as a silent witness to the unraveling of a soul burdened by its own choices, a heartbreaking melody played out in the confined solitude of the vehicle.

As Rafe's sobs subsided, leaving an eerie stillness in the air, he wiped away the remnants of his tears and took a deep breath. The realization of the damage he had inflicted upon his own life hung heavily in the air. Gathering his composure, he straightened up in the driver's seat, his face a canvas of emotional turmoil.

-

Later that night, at the chateau, you found solace in the comfort of your room, immersed in the chaotic world of Jersey Shore on your screen. The dim glow of the television cast a soft ambiance, providing a temporary escape from the recent tumultuous events. The familiar banter and antics of the reality TV cast served as a momentary distraction, allowing you to detach from the complications of your own reality. The room echoed with the scripted drama of the show, a stark contrast to the unscripted chaos that had unfolded in your life.

As the characters on the screen navigated their tumultuous relationships, you found a strange comfort in their exaggerated drama, the absurdity of their situations a welcome distraction. The rhythmic crunching of Cheez-Its provided a simple, satisfying soundtrack to the unfolding chaos on the television.

Wrapped in a cozy blanket, you allowed yourself to get lost in the antics of Snooki and the gang, temporarily forgetting the complexities awaiting you outside the fictional realm. The glow of the TV bathed the room in a warm, artificial light, creating a cocoon of familiarity and routine amid the recent upheaval.

Lost in the mindless entertainment, you relished this respite from the storm that had swept through your life, if only for a brief moment. The cheery, mindless laughter from the show mingled with the occasional rustle of the snack bag, forming a soothing backdrop to your solitary night of escapism.

The sudden buzz of your phone disrupted the faux-reality unfolding on the TV screen. You retrieved the device, and your heart skipped a beat when you saw Rafe's name illuminated on the display. Uncertainty and a tinge of nervousness swept over you as you contemplated answering or letting it go to voicemail.

A million thoughts raced through your mind – the recent events, the hurtful incident, and the unresolved emotions that lingered in the air. You hesitated for a moment, the allure of a potential conversation with Rafe conflicting with the fear of reopening wounds. The room, once a haven of mindless entertainment, now felt charged with anticipation.

With a deep breath, you decided to answer, your thumb sliding across the screen to accept the call. The line connected, and you braced yourself for the unknown, unsure of what awaited you on the other end of the conversation.

"Hey," you greeted Rafe, your voice carrying a mix of hesitation and confusion.

"Y/N," Rafe's voice slurred on the other end, accompanied by the faint sounds of background chaos. The shakiness in his tone hinted at a state of inebriation, leaving you with a mixture of concern and discomfort. The unexpected turn of events added another layer of uncertainty to an already complex situation.

"What's going on?" you asked cautiously, your mind trying to decipher the situation through the limited cues in his voice.

"I messed up," Rafe admitted, his words heavy with regret. The disjointed nature of his speech suggested a lack of coherence, and you couldn't help but wonder how deeply his actions had affected him.

"I fucking miss you, Y/N," Rafe confessed, his words laced with a raw emotion that transcended the haze of his intoxicated state. As the sincerity in his voice resonated through the phone, you couldn't ignore the impact his admission had on you.

There was a momentary silence, only broken by the distant sounds of the party or gathering Rafe seemed to be in. It was a stark contrast to the weight of his words, creating a surreal atmosphere.

Rafe continued, his voice softer, "I messed up, and I… I just needed to hear your voice."

You could hear the vulnerability in his tone, and it stirred conflicting emotions within you. Despite the hurt he caused, the sincerity in his words touched a chord.

"Rafe, where are you? Are you okay?" Concern laced your voice, and you couldn't help but feel a mixture of worry and empathy for him.

Rafe took a moment before responding, the background noise suggesting he was in a lively and chaotic environment. "I'm at this stupid fucking party," he muttered, the disdain evident in his words. "I need you, y/n. It's killing me that I can't touch you or even see your face."

As he spoke, you couldn't ignore the tug of conflicting emotions within you. While his vulnerability struck a chord, the memories of the recent events and the pain he caused were still fresh in your mind.

"Rafe…" Your voice softened, a mixture of sympathy and caution evident as you spoke his name.

He interrupted you, the alcohol evident in his slurred speech. "Look, I-I know I fucked up. Big time. I don't know what to do." There was a rawness in his voice, a stark contrast to his usual confident demeanor.

A heavy sigh escaped you as you processed his words. Despite the hurt he caused, you couldn't completely shut off the empathy you felt for someone clearly struggling. "Rafe, maybe you should go home and sleep it off. We can talk tomorrow when you're in a better state."

Rafe's response was a defeated murmur. "I just… I miss you so damn much."

The weight of his words hung in the air, leaving you torn between compassion and self-preservation.

Reluctantly, you agreed, deciding that making sure Rafe was safe took precedence over your own discomfort. "Okay, fine. Just… send me the address of where you are."

Rafe clumsily managed to type out the address in his inebriated state. As you received the message, you couldn't help but shake your head, a mix of frustration and concern settling in. After a moment's hesitation, you texted back, "Stay put. I'll be there soon."

Turning off the TV, you quickly changed into something more presentable, preparing yourself for a night that seemed to be taking unexpected turns.

Your footsteps echoed in the quiet night as you hurriedly made your way to the car. The cool evening air did little to ease the tension that wrapped around you. As you drove to the address Rafe had sent, a myriad of thoughts raced through your mind. The uncertainty of what you were about to walk into gnawed at you, but concern for Rafe propelled you forward.

The drive seemed to stretch on longer than usual, each passing streetlight casting shadows that mirrored the anxiety building within you. You arrived at the destination, a dimly lit area that seemed to amplify the weight of the situation. Taking a deep breath, you steeled yourself for whatever lay ahead and stepped out of the car, determined to face the tumultuous night with Rafe.

The chaotic scene unfolded before you as you navigated through the rowdy crowd of inebriated teenagers. Their laughter and cheers mingled with the distant music, creating a dissonant backdrop to your urgent calls for Rafe. You scanned the front yard, searching for any sign of him, but the chaos made it challenging to discern individual faces.

The flickering glow of party lights illuminated the scene, casting an eerie ambiance on the gathering. Despite the lively atmosphere, an unsettling tension lingered in the air. Your calls for Rafe went unanswered, drowned out by the revelry around you. Determined, you pushed through the crowd, determined to find him and ensure he was safe amidst the chaos.

Your determination carried you through the dense crowd inside the house, the pulse of the music and the chatter of partygoers reverberating through the walls. As you pushed your way towards the living room, the energy of the crowd seemed to intensify. You soon reached the epicenter of attention, discovering a swirling mass of people encircling a couch and a coffee table.

A mixture of curiosity and anxiety fueled your movements as you elbowed your way to the front of the crowd, desperately trying to catch a glimpse of what was happening. The chaotic scene unfolded before your eyes, revealing a tableau of excess and debauchery. As the sea of bodies parted, you finally saw Rafe in the midst of it all, his eyes glassy and his demeanor far from composed. The weight of the situation settled heavily on your shoulders, and you knew that this night held unforeseen challenges.

A mix of shock, concern, and disappointment washed over you as you observed the scene unfolding before you. The group of girls surrounding Rafe seemed to revel in the chaos, cheering him on with enthusiasm that only fueled the reckless atmosphere. The sight of Rafe snorting a line of coke, his head tilting back as he inhaled the substance, left a bitter taste in your mouth.

As the crowd continued to revel in the spectacle, you felt a growing sense of urgency. The reality of Rafe's actions hit you, and you knew you couldn't stand idly by. Determination fueled your steps as you pushed through the onlookers, your focus solely on reaching Rafe and addressing the concerning situation at hand.

"Rafe? What the fuck is this?" Your voice cut through the chaos as you confronted Rafe, the intensity of the situation reflected in your expression. The cheers and laughter around you faded into the background as you locked eyes with him, demanding an explanation for the reckless scene playing out before you.

Rafe, seemingly caught off guard, looked up from the table, his eyes meeting yours. There was a moment of hesitation in his gaze, a mix of guilt and surprise. The atmosphere in the room shifted, tension hanging thick in the air as you awaited his response.

"Y/N," Rafe mumbled, his voice laced with a mixture of regret and the effects of the substances he had just taken. He absentmindedly wiped his nose, a visible sign of his actions.

The room fell into a momentary silence, broken only by the distant sounds of the party continuing in the background. Your eyes remained fixed on him, waiting for an explanation or any sign of recognition. The gravity of the situation sank in, and a mix of emotions swirled within you—anger, disappointment, and a twinge of concern for someone you once cared about deeply.

"Rafey, who is this?" One of the inebriated girls besides Rafe chimed in, much to your dismay.

Ignoring the girl, you locked eyes with Rafe, your expression a mix of confusion and frustration. "What the hell is going on, Rafe?"

He struggled to focus, his gaze flickering between you and the party unfolding around him. "I just wanted to forget, y/n. Forget everything," he slurred, the weight of his words punctuated by the chaos of the party.

The room continued to buzz with energy as the partygoers paid little attention to the unfolding drama. The atmosphere was tense, and you felt a whirlwind of emotions coursing through you.

"C'mon Rafe, we're leaving." You grabbed Rafe's arm, pulling him away from the crowd. The girls protested, but you ignored them, determined to get him out of this chaotic scene. Rafe stumbled as he followed you, his movements unsteady.

As you made your way through the crowded house, you couldn't help but feel a mix of disappointment and concern. You guided Rafe towards the door, eager to remove him from the toxic environment. The night had taken an unexpected turn, and you were left grappling with the reality of the situation.

Rafe ended up following you out to your car, stumbling as he tried to keep up with you. You opened the passenger door in an attempt to help him in, but before you could be successful with doing so, he stopped you.

"Y/N, wait," Rafe called out, his voice wavering.

You turned to look at him, your hand still on the car door, waiting for an explanation.

Rafe took a deep breath, his eyes filled with remorse. "I fucking miss you, and I hate knowing fucking JJ is the one who is taking care of you when it should be me," he admitted, his words hanging heavy in the air.

"I can't, Y/N," Rafe said, stopping you from closing the car door. His eyes were pleading, and his voice trembled with vulnerability. "I can't take care of you like he can. I messed everything up, and I don't deserve you."

You sighed, torn between frustration and concern. "Rafe, just get in the car. We can talk about this later," you urged, wanting to address the situation at hand first.

Rafe took a step back, rubbing his temples as if trying to push away a headache. "I messed up, Y/N. I messed up everything," he admitted, his voice strained. "I thought I could protect you and fix things, but I only made them worse. I can't compete with JJ. He's been there for you, taking care of you, and I… I just have to watch from afar."

You looked at him, seeing the pain in his eyes. Despite the turmoil of the situation, a part of you couldn't help but feel sorry for him.

"Rafe, please," you pleaded, your voice a hushed whisper, "not here. Let's get you home, and we can talk about it later."

He nodded, still looking disoriented, and you managed to guide him into the car. The girls who had gathered around seemed disappointed, but you ignored their judgmental stares. You closed the car door, and as you got behind the wheel, you couldn't shake the feeling that things had taken a turn for the worse.

As you drove Rafe home, he sat silently in the passenger seat, occasionally letting out a quiet apology. The atmosphere in the car was heavy with tension, and you couldn't shake off the worry that had settled in your chest. The Rafe you knew was put-together and conscious of his image, replaced by this version consumed by substances and self-destruction. You kept stealing glances at him, the apology in his eyes mirroring the internal turmoil within you.

You arrived at the Cameron's home, the emptiness of the house mirroring the void you felt within yourself. Assisting Rafe out of the car, you couldn't shake the worry and frustration that had taken root in your mind. The place felt desolate, echoing the emptiness of the situation between you and Rafe. You had Rafe's arm draped over your shoulder, his incoherent murmurs echoing in the silent house. Each step felt like a heavy burden, a somber atmosphere surrounding you as you helped him inside.

"Alright Rafe, you're gonna have to help me get you up the stairs," You struggled to support Rafe's weight as you reached the foot of the staircase. His movements were sluggish, and you knew you needed his cooperation to navigate the stairs safely.

"Y/n," Rafe groaned, stumbling up the stairs, "you've ruined me."

You rolled your eyes, a mixture of annoyance and concern etching your expression. Guiding him up the stairs, you replied, "You've done a pretty good job of that yourself, Rafe."

Rafe's words slurred as he leaned against the wall, struggling to maintain his balance. "N-No, it's killing me without you here," he mumbled, his eyes glazed and unfocused.

You sighed, realizing the gravity of the situation. "Rafe, let's get you to bed. We can talk about everything tomorrow when you're sober."

With effort, you managed to guide him to his room. He collapsed onto the bed, his eyes heavy with intoxication. As you turned to leave, he weakly grabbed your hand.

"Don't leave, Y/n," he pleaded, his vulnerability piercing through the haze of substances.

You hesitated, torn between sympathy and frustration. "Rafe, you need to rest. We'll talk in the morning."

"Y/n, please stay," Rafe pleaded, his eyes filled with desperation. "I can't handle being alone right now. I need you."

You sighed, torn between your concern for him and the boundaries you had set. The night had taken unexpected turns, and you found yourself grappling with the aftermath of Rafe's emotional outburst.

"I'll stay for a little while," you relented, pulling a chair closer to his bed. "But we need to talk about everything, Rafe. Tomorrow, when you're sober."

He nodded, a mix of gratitude and sadness in his eyes as you settled in to keep watch over him through the night. "Will you at least lay with me?"

You hesitated for a moment, unsure of the implications, but eventually, you sighed and joined Rafe on the bed. He rested his head on your stomach, and you gently ran your fingers through his hair. The room was filled with a heavy silence, interrupted only by Rafe's soft breathing.

As you lay there, you couldn't help but reflect on the events of the day. The unexpected twists and turns had left you emotionally drained. The boundaries you had carefully set seemed to blur in the face of Rafe's vulnerability.

You decided that tomorrow would bring clarity, a chance to address the issues that had surfaced. For now, you focused on providing some comfort to Rafe, hoping that the morning light would bring a clearer perspective on the tangled emotions surrounding you both.

taglist: @ellesalazar, @champomiel, @vadinaleme, @kys4-20, @gills-lounge, @allsmilesreally7, @sublimepenguinpeach-blog, @sp00ky-spr1te, @bibliophilewednesday, @haroldpotterson, @i-love-rafe, @ellesalazar, @calmoistorm, @abundantxadorations, @fals3-g0d, @gillybear17, @oiiviagrande, @hockeybabe87, @augustlikesdeath, @wpdailyminimeta, @palmwinemami, @loxleys-blog, @ikisscline, @flyestvenustrap, @ilovesteveharrngton, @ijustwanttoreadlols, @fastlovela, @wickedlovely121, @fals3-g0d

#drew starkey #rafe cameron #rafe cameron x reader #obx #outer banks #rafe angst #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe imagine #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron x pogue!reader #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank #rafe fic #rafe cameron x you #rafe x reader #rafe cameron fic #obx 4

[cottagec0relover21]

Ok so, the idea just popped in my mind and I RLLY need someone to write it LMAO

Your Chilchuck fics give me LIFE so you were me go to, no questions asked

Could I get Chilchuck with a reader (preferably male, but gender neutral is also ok!) who miscalculated the ammount of anxiety medication they had left and ended up running out in the middle of the dungeon? Reader is having a hard time with their anxiety ticks and one of the side effects of going a bit too long without them is his body starting to "shut down" and become slightly like a ragdoll. Reader is still talkative and behaves as normal besides their head going to the side aggressively, flopping to the side and body parts just going all weak when they sit, flopping legit like a ragdoll (this os very self indulgent and has happened to me once, it is not good to say the least LMAO)

I completely understand if this makes you uncomfortable to write! And if so, a reader with severe generalized anxiety would work in the place of this request!

Hii! I'm sorry if this took too long ;-; since I have generalized anxiety and therefore I'm more knowledgeable about that subject, I'll write for a reader with severe generalized anxiety. I don't want to fuck up the other option with the ticks and such, because I don't know about the condition and I don't want to offend anyone. So hopefully this is okay!! love y'all thanks for being patient!

(Also changing my POV today) I'm so glad you love the way I write, it means the world to know that💗

"A Comforting Half-ling"

[Chilchuck Tims x gn!reader]

Warnings: none - fluff

Your hands were sweaty. You had been fidgeting with your fingers for a while, feeling a pit at the bottom of your stomach that made you even more anxious that you already were. The slight pang of pain in the chest that came from time to time the more you thought about the problem at hand bothering you as you sat on the corner of one of the rooms of the dungeon that the group had stopped by. Why were you so anxious? Simple. There was another party in that same room, and the rest of the group had decided to be all social and chat for a bit as they sat down to take a break from walking around.

Gosh I must look really weird sitting alone in this corner. I think they didn't hear me when I said "hi." What if they think I'm an asshole? Or a weirdo? Or a weird asshole?! you thought, looking around the room.

—Oh yeah, and that one there is (y/n), they're kinda shy— you jumped, your head snapping back to stare at the middle of the room as Laios pointed a finger back at you. Everyone's eyes were on you. Never had you wanted earth to swallow you whole and never come back so desperately before.

As the conversation resumed, the half-foot's eyes stayed on you, a curious and worried expression on his face as he watched you fidget with your hands.

He excused himself softly and walked up to them.

—Hey, why don't you come with me for a second? I need your help with something— Chilchuck pointed to the door, and your feet hurried to stand up and get out of the room as quickly as possible. Once outside that room, and away from the hearing range of the others, he sat against the wall, patting the space beside him.— What's got you so jumpy?— he looks at you, genuine curiosity in his voice.

Looking at him, you wonder if it's okay to admit out loud how anxious you were about, not just talking to people, but almost anything that had to do with being in public.— You're always behind us when we encounter other parties, and you don't seem to want to be there. I'm starting to think you're not just "shy"— Chilchuck called you out.

Beginning to explain to him how you were always on edge around people wasn't the easiest task. Admitting that, you were afraid of not being seen as capable, but being seen as a bother or even a burden ate you up every second of your life to Chilchuck was hard but worth it, because now you had someone that understood you better than any of the rest of the group. Everyone gets a little anxious at times, but you were a little extra anxious about everything.

Sitting cross-legged and now intently staring at you as you finished your through explanation of how you felt almost all the time, Chilchuck sighed and placed a comforting hand over your shoulder.— I'm really sorry you have to feel like that. I get anxious for five minutes and I hate it, so you being on edge all the damn time must suck— he offered a sympathetic apology, understanding you easily.— Whenever you feel like that, just... uh– try and tell me, or nudge me, whatever works best for you— he smiles softly, and the look on your face makes him huff softly in embarrassment and look away, retrieving his hand from your shoulder. When you give a soft laugh at his reaction he starts protesting and huffing at you, although we all know he wasn't seriously that upset.

When you hug him, however, he falls silent and sighs, taking a moment to return your embrace.

From then on Chilchuck tries his best to comfort you and help you everytime he notices you feeling anxious.

You need to buy something but can't because you're afraid of taking too long and upsetting the line behind you? He'll go with you and hold your hand. Maybe you're afraid of the guy at the stall, selling whatever it is you want to buy. Don't worry, he'll talk for you when you get nervous and start to stutter. Or even if you don't even want to talk at all.

Afraid someone is judging you? He's jokingly rolling his sleeves up and asking "Who? Who is it? Point at them and they'll never see what got them!" (They won't but that's because he's small and he kicks their knee from behind)

If you feel like everyone is judging you, though, he holds your hand and guides you away into a corridor/hallway where it's less crowded

Ever start hyperventilating? The first time he'll panic, and he'll struggle to find the words and actions to properly help you calm down. But it doesn't take him long before he has it memorized.

You're basically the only one on the group who's got Chikchuck breaking his rules about innerparty relationships, because he's grown very close and attached to you.

You're such an amazing person, you shouldn't have to struggle like this.

He gets very happy for you when you manage to do something that makes you anxious on your own. Maybe you spoke up to a whole group of people completely alone, or maybe you went and bought something that you really wanted without struggling at all.

When that happens he's sure to give you a smile and a thumbs up or a pat on your leg (you're taller than him, don't tease him about it or he'll get all red in the face and start mumbling to himself)

Overall, Chilchuck would understand you and try to help. He struggles, and sometimes you might think you're being a bother for him, but he makes sure to tell you that "no, you're not a burden nor a bother. I'm simply... not used to comforting people that often."

+ romantic established relationship headcannons

If you tell him that having him by your side is comforting, even in the slightest, he'll cough and look away, hiding his growing embarrassment.

If you ask to borrow something of his to comfort you, he's scrambling all over his words but eventually giving said item to you gladly.

You hide your face in his scarf after wrapping it around your neck and softly inhale his scent— Ah... you smell so nice. And the scarf is so warm— so is his face. A beautiful tomato red all over his cheeks and ears as he looks at you, genuinely feeling better just by borrowing his scarf.

Or maybe you borrow his gloves (if they fit) and put them on.— Okay... but why my gloves?— he asks curiously, waiting an eyebrow as he looks up at you.

You smile, wiggling your fingers after putting the gloves on— Makes me feel like I'm holding your hand— he falls silent, and he opens his mouth to speak, but the only thing that comes out is a flustered exhale as he turns around and walks away from you as he mumbles a "you're unbelievably.... cute" that you're sure he didn't mean for you to hear.

A few minutes later he'll return by your side as you're walking and extend his hand up, looking ahead— You can just hold my damn hand, you know?— he mumbles, and you notice how his cheeks tint with red once again.

#delicious in dungeon #dungeon meshi #chilchuck tims x reader #fanfic #chilchuck #chilchuk tims

[vagabond-umlaut]

Year In Review 2023

Inspired by this post by the lovely Bloomy [@bloompompom] to list my favourites from the stories I've written, 'cause YES. Self-love is one of the best forms of love. And there's no better way to start a new year than by giving that amazing person in our reflection a well-earned pat on the back and a genuine compliment. 😊❤️

⁕ skew lines

This was the 1st full-fledged oneshot I wrote here. And honestly, I'm in love with the way I executed the plot and expressed the many emotions of the characters here. I read this to motivate myself whenever I fall into a writing slump, no jokes.

⁕ paper planes

This was a simple way of expressing just how much I adore the idea of raising the two cutest angels in the world, 'Miki and 'Gumi, along with Satoru... An extremely self-indulgent piece, I admit. Teeheehee.

⁕ BTS: BEHOLD THE SCREEN

I love SMAUs. I love 'Toru x Shortie even more. Need I say anything more? HEHE.

⁕ One Day, Three Autumns

This series haunts me every day and night. I had never shown the courage to deal with complicated emotions and complicated characters before I started this. But now, I feel so happy with myself, I decided to take the plunge and give it my all. It is my best work in my eyes till date.

⁕ six seeds, like rubies...

One of my shortest writings, but one of my most cherished ones for sure. I love the archaic and poetic quality this work carries, besides the fact it heralded the beginning of my feelings for the feared yet so dear King of Curses.

⁕ cauterize; cicatrize

The innumerable ideas and myriad possibilities this story gives rise to in my brain earns it a spot on this list. I cannot wait to write more for this particular version of the King of Curses & his Queen in the new year!

⁕ tv taught me how to feel; now real life has no appeal

I wrote 4.3k in less than a day. Taking only two breaks. Can you imagine? Yeah, no. Nor can I, honestly. But I really did. And this made my self-confidence increase so much for real!!

⁕ JJK Historical AU ✨✨

I like it for what it is today; I'm certain I shall love it for what it will be tomorrow.

And last but definitely not the least— Thank you so so much to all those who have read my stories. And/Or have interacted with them. I cannot express adequately how much I love and appreciate every one of you wonderful people, my loves. Thank you so very much once again. Wishing you all a marvellous New Year 2024 ahead! 😊😊❤️❤️

This cute divider is by @benkeibear.

Mentioning those who I've annoyed so much this year & hope to annoy even more in the future days: @pupkashi, @heresan, @javarium, @avatarofstars, @manjibunny, @nanamikentoseyebags, @saenora, @nkogneatho, @satocidal, @thefallofruins, @roseqzpd, @poe-daydreams, @yuujispinkhair, @seeingivy, @satoruhour, @tender-rosiey, @konigbabe, @dellalyra, @ritsatoru, @4sat0ruu, @strawberrystepmom, @guccirosegold + many others whom I cannot remember right now but please know, I love y'all so much! *MWAH MWAH MWAH* 🥰🥰🥰

#gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x you #ryomen sukuna x reader #ryomen sukuna x you #jjk x reader #jjk x you #kit posts 📝

[jayflrt]

no bc it actually sickens me the amount of people i’ve seen saying they “can’t wait until december 9th” WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM? incredibly gross and predatory, riki’s already faced so much of this since debut and it’s just gonna get worse i feel :/ like that is still someone you’ve watched grow up… i’m not that much older than him but it feels so icky to even suggest anything like that abt him. thank you for clearly drawing a line there bc ive seen a lot of people completely cross it

he was only 14 when he was in iland like!!! :( im gonna say something sorta mean and might be controversial but smut can genuinely give y'all porn addictions if the content is not consumed in moderation. this happens a lot on ao3 :( like i have zero problem with smut writers writing smut content they like or strictly posting nsfw on their blogs, or readers indulging in sexual content as a healthy outlet (i mean i write smut for hyung line myself so i very much understand!!!!)

but when you're literally fiending for content to the point where you're crossing way too many lines and preying on minors just for some sexual gratification then it's literally an addiction at that point !! :/ i've seen so many people s3xualize sunoo and jungwon right after they turned 19 and plan to write for them well before like 😭

#💌 : love notes #anon

[tangledinink]

Heya! First off I’m around halfway through teenage mutant what now and it is the funniest fic I have ever read - Beautifully written and overall brilliant but the jokes get me every time

And second, is it okay if I reference a pose from one of your gemini artworks for my own work? I’ll credit the inspiration if I post it anywhere ^^

whew we're overdue for an ask dump,,, OKAY ALRIGHT.

THANK YOU ; w ; I'm really glad you like it hehehehe. also yeah sure feel free! I don't mind! ^^

HEHEHE THIS MAKES ME VERY HAPPY THANK YOU

oh he DEFINITELY freaked out at first. there was a lot of panicking and confusion and "how could this even happen?!" ("you think i'd genetically engineer a creature that's not capable of reproducing? all of you should be genetically compatible with practically any yokai," draxum said. "AND YOU DIDN'T THINK TO, I DUNNO, TELL US THAT?!" donnie said.) but eventually, he did calm down, and he and his partner talked about it (a bunch, multiple times), and eventually some of the panic gave way to... curiosity, first of all... and then maybe kind of excitement? and some fondness? i mean, he was still pretty scared, and sure, he doesn't really consider himself a 'kid' person, but it's not like he never thought about EVENTUALLY having kids, just maybe... not so soon? but. i mean.

well. if they're already cooking...

THANK YOU ; w ; i'm glad you like them! @kiwi-smug-silvalina

oh gosh, that's a good question. i'm not entirely sure... uhmmm... i would say perhaps... details about how gemini!donnie's witchcraft looks and acts, VS how venus's witchcraft looks and acts...

it is very shiny. i like that people call it "the bean" instead of its actual title coz it pisses anish kapoor off.

ah ; w ; THANK YOU SO MUCH,,, thats so sweet and this made me very happy,,, <3 im glad you liked it!!!! @allegedllama

HEHEHE thank you. yes im aware that i am deranged.

omg same hat!!! i was a lifeguard and it was.... uh.... INTERESTING to say the least... (sometimes lovely, sometimes AWFUL...) @datfearlesschick

if by games you mean 'messed up deals that she can manipulate to her own advantage,' then yes! @frogonamelon

@beannary @spectralsleuth @heckitall @livsinpjs and the sep council as a whole!!! y'all's support has definitely meant so much and there's no way i'd have gotten as far with any of my projects as i have without them... or without literally ANY of the people who take the time to do things like reblog with tags, leave commentary in the tags, send in asks about my stories, etc etc etc! that's definitely one of my main motivators to create more!!! <3 thank y'all!

EEEE this made me smile, hehehehe. thank you :3c @thejavavoid

AAAAAA THANK YOU THIS GENUINELY MADE ME SO HAPPY COZ I WAS SO GODDAMN PROUD OF THOSE HANDS AND HOW THEY CAME OUT ; w ; THANK YOU @onejellyfishplease

thank you!!! u w u @fanrulerjynx

THANK YOU ; w ; I REALLY APPRECIATE THIS,,, it made me very very very happy and HEHEHE IM GLAD YOU LIKE YASSIFIED DRAXUM,,, i just think he DESERVES it, y'know? also thats just my favorite way to draw characters lmao I think it's fun so I decided for this comic I just get to indulge...

not necessarily-- this was mostly just a coincidence! @breezehurricane

oh gosh. i'm not sure, but i know it definitely WILL affect their parenting... i think at first donnie will find himself just... deferring to his partner a LOT in almost any situation because he's afraid that he'll fuck it up, because he DOESN'T feel like he understands proper boundaries or what parenting is supposed to look like, etc etc etc, and he's afraid he'll mess up. he probably reads a TON of parenting books as well because RESEARCH and will often try to pull directly from them in any situation he can, and is confused when things don't go exactly the way they were described in the text... leo i think kind of tends to flounder between being overprotective and feeling the desire to protect his son from everything and anything and wanting to overcorrect this tendency by pulling back and trying to give him as much freedom and space as possible, which sometimes leads to some... inconsistencies. there's definitely a learning curve for both of them, but they both get the hang of it eventually. they both have lovely partners and a very loving and supportive family to help them and they'll figure it out with a bit of practice.

ahhh thank you! :D im so delighted that my silly stories actually inspired something for you!!! hell yeah!!! MAKING THINGS IS GREAT!!! THANK YOU!!! @can-elope

i like to imagine them all staying very close, especially coz i'm loosely planning on them all going through the kraang-apocalypse together (and then coming through to the other side!) so i can't imagine them ever drifting too far from each other, emotionally or geographically. there's a bit of a rocky start for a lot of them, but all of the siblings end up a very tight-knit bunch.

#asks #ask dump #anon

[nagichi-boop]

I’m not sure if this is something anyone else has picked up on, but after watching reactions to Itsuomi’s confession to Yuki, a lot of people got confused as to why she kept asking why Itsuomi even wanted to date her. I want to offer my two cents, but please note that there’s a degree of projection in my opinion, so maybe y'all will have a different viewpoint. As another disclaimer, I haven’t read the manga (yet!!), so my assessment of the characters is based on episodes 1-9 of the anime.

Yuki, for the most part, is a somewhat self-assured character. She’s a little insecure, but she also isn’t afraid to take chances on developing her relationship with Itsuomi. But she has also never experienced a romantic relationship with anyone. On top of that, she has grown up only being able to talk to very few people. One of the only people she could talk to, Oushi, has only used sign language to be mean to her. Sure, maybe on the outside it doesn’t get to her. But if you hear negative thoughts over and over throughout your life, it can influence you subtly.

If you’ll indulge me for a moment, I’d like to share my experiences briefly so that hopefully my viewpoints on Yuki’s behaviour makes sense. I myself am disabled. I’m not deaf, but I am mentally and physically disabled. As it stands right now, I feel I am growing to accept myself more and I’m working on treating myself with more kindness. However, when I think about someone liking me romantically, my biggest fear is that they won’t be able to tolerate my disabilities. It affects my communication, my independence, my tolerance for activity, among other things. In my mind, there are so many better and easier options than me. Even before I watched this anime, I always imagined that if someone I liked confessed to me, I’d be compelled to ask them why, not because I doubted the person being genuine, but because I am clouded by my own negative self-perception.

Going back to Yuki, I can totally see her having a similar line of thought. She views Itsuomi as someone who is popular; she even makes a comment about how anyone would fall for him if they were treated the way he treated her, since she assumed his treatment of her wasn’t special. She also, multiple times, becomes insecure about his relationship with Emma, despite being assured by multiple people (including Itsuomi) that they aren’t romantically involved. And despite doing so much that would indicate his affection for Yuki - the gentle way he talks to her, the fact he repeatedly wraps his arm around her, pats her head, smiles at her (despite being an otherwise inexpressive person) and literally kisses her hand - she still doesn’t realise that maybe her feelings are reciprocated. Why? Because of her own self-doubt.

When she asks Itsuomi why he wants to date her, I don’t think she is confused by what he means. I think there’s a part of her that can’t believe why, out of everyone he has met, he would choose her specifically. She needed Itsuomi to convince her that he genuinely wanted to be with her. Even after they start dating, she still needs to clarify with Rin that it’s okay for her to call him her boyfriend. These things are perhaps givens, but she is an anxious person by nature, so of course she struggles a little to understand the ‘rules’ of being in a relationship are.

Anyways uhh, thanks for reading this ramble! Let me know what y'all think. There’s a chance this won’t be the last post about A Sign of Affection that I make. I want to talk about my thoughts on Itsuomi (and maybe Oushi) in more depth at some point, but I’d like to catch up on the manga first.

#yuki itose #itose yuki #itsuomi nagi #nagi itsuomi #itsuomi x yuki #yuki x itsuomi #a sign of affection #yubisaki to renren #anime #long post #nagichi talks

[macabrecravings]

Ohhhhhh... Very optional. And, naturally, something that could have multitudinous answers, so multiple could absolutely be given. But ALSO...

Given that they're talking again/have made up, enough that they could get away with it, what do you think the first non-"book criminal" thing Sydney would write on Kylar would be? Would Sydney change how they write book criminal on them, even, like they do for PC? Or would they not write on Kylar at all, maybe!

(BONUS: ADORE YOUR WRITING!! The thought you put into Sydneyposts and both your understanding of him and how he'd articulate things absolutely fucks to read :} your ocs seem really cool too... well wishes)

I HAVE!!! SO MANY THOUGHTS about Sydney (& Kylar) bodywriting <3 This got LONG but I'm genuinely rotating this so hard, thank you for prompting me.

— When they're closer, I imagine the normal "Book Criminal >:(" would become “Book Criminal :(“ with a sad face. Reason being...? Well, he's disappointed that Kylar's still destructing school property, even after all of his lecturing

— It's really fun to picture Sydney writing "Interesting" on Kylar, like he does to the PC when he's intrigued by them/getting closer to them. Interesting is... definitely one way to describe him, for sure. Kylar scrunches his face at it, trying to decipher what he means by it. Gets all grumpy and huffy, tries to glare at him but he just kinda looks like a wet cat LMFAO.

— Playing off of another canon Sydlar scene, I'm going to go ahead and take his "Kylar >:(" and make it "Kylar :)" [The original scene happens while Sydney & Kylar are fighting over PC and taking turns writing on them, but in this scenario I imagine it like most of his other PC bodywriting scenes.] - "Hey, can I write something on you?" - "Ah? Uh... y-yeah, I guess...?" - **Kylar :)** Kylar stares at it, confused. Why'd he... label him?

— Putting aside the fact that Sydney is super organized & clean, I loooveee the idea of him being a doodler. Hence why he draws little hearts and faces on people. Unlike Kylar, he refrains from drawing on school assignments & library books, but he still finds it enjoyable!! So, hear me out. Little stars, hearts, swirls, dotting the back of Kylar's hand and up his arm after he sits at the same table as him :)

Bonus points if Kylar rolls the sleeves of his school uniform/jacket down over them and forgets about them until that evening when he heads home. When he sees them again, the little red doodles are all smudged and he's kinda like, "Ah. Right." Maybe daydreams about it a little bit before he washes it off.

— Bit of a mushier, more self-indulgent one here but ummm...! Sydney writing nice little quips / little motivational phrases on Kylar's arms. Supportive little phrases to boost his confidence and keep him going throughout the day when things are rough. He rolls his eyes at the gesture, thinks it's dumb. But... at the same time, they’re validating. Having genuinely supportive reminders on his skin that contrast his scars? Ough...

(P.S. That means THE WORLD to me...!!!! My absolute favorite part of writing is characterization & I genuinely put so much thought into taking canonical bases and fleshing them out / expanding them while trying to keep it in the general realm of possibility!!! A lot of the time w/ the roleplay account, it's like taking a shot in the dark and running off of pure vibes so I looveeee that y'all enjoy what I do w/ it :))

Also. I'm so obsessed with my OCs, I can't wrap my head around the fact that people enjoy them as much as I do but I wouldn't change it for the world ;w; Characterizing and fleshing them out is a blast too, I'm not limited by anything really,,,, I find myself going "ugh I wish ____ would do *this* and I've got to be like. "I mean... who's stopping you...?" </3 Be free!!! Do whatever you want forever!! <3)

#sydney the faithful #kylar the loner #degrees of lewdity #my writing📕💌 #technically #sydney dol #kylar dol

[aintashes]

thank you to so many of my wonderful mutuals for participating in my silly little worm shenanigans :') it was so much fun to see everyone's answers and i loved every minute of it. you're all so funny and talented, did you know that ??

it genuinely warms ( worms ? ) my heart to have so many people indulge these incredibly random and silly asks. so many of my mutuals have mentioned that it made their day to see all of the answers. y'all are the best. it's really amazing to have such community here on daryl's blog.

anyone who got an ask from me but didn't answer it before this post goes up— please feel free to answer anyway and your post will still get reblogged into the tag no matter when it gets posted !

here are some fun stats from the whole event ! 🪱

first worm ask sent to: @rayofsunshinc's michonne first worm ask answered by: @afterdeaths' damian cutest / sweetest answer posted by: @painmon's peter first to be bamboozled by daryl: @florrentine's emilia first worm ask sent to me ( plot twist ): @allevils' lucy meanest answer posted by: @chaos--mode's ren most shocked by daryl's behavior: @gunpink's isa accidental cannibalism...?: @rottine first to ask to keep the worm: @rebuiltmyself

and the grand prize winner, the first person to actually eat the worm: @serpcntes' judith !!

total worms folks accepted from daryl: 6 🪱

the tag is here for anyone who wants to look through all of the worm day shenanigans now or in the future ! love y'all. thanks for making it so fun. it was a wonderful wormy weekend :')

#daryl and his worms. ( 2024 ) #y'all are seriously the best #this was genuinely so hysterical and fun and i really had such a good time #as did so many others !!! #reading the tags on your posts and seeing your muses' reactions was such a wonderful time #thank you thank you thank you :') <3

[fillinforlater]

Monday of Appreciation: Part 65

Hello everyone, Smite here!

It's Monday and so I am back, bringing you MoA consistently since 2021. Should I put a trade mark on that now? Lmao. If I had more time I would make it a whole review paper. Okay that is a tiny bit over the top and optimistic, but nonetheless, the appreciation will be given. You mustn't resist :)

Update: After the craziness I posted last week, I'll go softer (or not?). My current projects are either long or haven't started, so you'll have to stay patient, thank you all!

-1-

@iznsfw: Sweet Talking ft. Sakura

Y E S, Kura smut! This dialogue only smut not only got me horny for more of IZ's Christmas posts, but also ready to finally write Sakura again... hopefully I'll make it till Christmas. Thank you for this very good piece, IZ, you never let us down!

-2-

@sinswithpleasure: [We'll Keep This] Our Dirty Little Secret ft. Chaewon

Sins writing Chaewon, omg! School uniform, stress relief, a little danger, just how I like it. Makes me want to do it in Uni tbh, although I'm a) missing the courage and b) missing the Chaewon. Maybe I'll get one soon kekw. Nice one, Sins!

-3-

@co-reborn: Reign ft. Saerom (Co-writer: @worldsover)

Oh fuck, anal galore. C.O and Levi and it's pure indulgence in and on the ass if Saerom. This is a guarantee to make you horny and an urgent call to read back the other parts. I really hope for more, you two are amazing!

-4-

@kaedespicelatte: white. ft. Chaehyun

Kaede is back, and from this one pic, we all know why. I dunno if my eyes could have been more spread open at seeing Chaehyun in that titty outfit. Click on the link to find out what I mean---reading the fic after that is a given ofc.

-5-

@ggidolsmuts: Hype Boy Hype Girl ft. Choi Yujin

Cuz I-I-I know what you like ddeun boy /

you're my-y-y chemical hype writer boy /

Y'all, listen to Hype Boy and read this fic. The clever usage of the lyrics makes it a blast to read, apart from the usual Ddeun smut greatness.

-6-

@existslikepristin: Summon ft. Lola (PIXY)

I'm angry: this has less than 40 Notes...

I know that the idol is not well know or the theme might be very unique and dark, but cmon, give it a try. It's very well written, genuinely scary and has an idol I've never seen written before. Good job, ELP!

-7-

@iznsfw: Mon Chef D'oeuvre ft. Hyewon

IZ could be on here so many fucking times, but I haven't been able to read all the new fics. I will get to them, I'm excited, but today it's ""just"" two. This one is my favorite, I swear, it's close to the perfect Hyewon fic. It combines elements I've seen in Levi's fics, with creative art smut, story telling and absolute drama. All with the touch of IZ, who is also an excellent angst writer.

I can really, really understand the #IZGOAT agenda. Fucking legendary! All Hyewon fans, READ THIS

Have nice December week, stay warm and hydrated!

#mondayofappreciation #idol smut #female idol smut #kpop smut #girl group smut #izone smut #hyewon smut #chaewon smut #sakura smut #le sserafim smut #lola smut #pixy smut #choi yujin smut #kepler smut #kep1er smut #chaehyun smut #saerom smut #fromis9 smut #fromis 9 smut #fromis smut

[sensitiveheartless]

Tagged by @iwritenarrativesandstuff! :D Thanks for the tag, sorry it took me a little bit —

I didn't really know what I was doing, but I tried my best!

6 characters that are me-coded (more or less):

I don't have the mental collectedness for tagging at the moment, but if any of y'all see this and want to do it, consider yourself tagged! :D

Rambling about why each character is here under the cut for the sake of space:

Nakajima Atsushi from Bungou Stray Dogs: genuinely the character I relate to the most of the BSD cast! (Which might be surprising considering my clear fixation on skk, but honestly Atsushi's plot sometimes hits a little too close to home for comfort, and I draw skk for comfort so. that is why I draw them more aksdjfksd) But yeah, Atsushi remains a very important character for me — I appreciate the fact that there's never a single moment where he just suddenly moves on from everything he's gone through, cause trauma really doesn't work like that.

Asakusa Midori from Keep Your Hands Off Eizouken!: She is an art gremlin who isn't the best at interacting with other people, and who can and will go on lengthy rambles about the media she cares about. Watching her as a kid especially feels like watching myself sometimes :0

Fujioka Haruhi from Ouran High School Host Club: she is one of the first characters in anything I watched who had a gender thing going on that I truly vibed with! (Also just in general, I tend to vibe with protagonists who aren't fully on board with being protagonists, which I think Haruhi counts as aksdjfksjdf)

Rincewind Discworld from Terry Pratchett's Discworld Series: Speaking of characters who aren't on board with being protagonists, here is possibly the most reluctant protagonist to ever protagonist! The drowned rat of a wizard who spends all of his books attempting to run away from the plot, and whose happy ending is finally getting to be a side character who doesn't get involved in the main storyline! Idk man, I just find his absolutely terrified determination to stay alive relatable. Also he isn't a very good wizard, but he is trying his best, which is also relatable.

Shang Qinghua from The Scum Villain's Self Saving System: I guess continuing the cowardly-but-doggedly-determined-to-stay allive trend in this, I find Airplane very relatable the same way I find Rincewind relatable! They are disasters. I am also a disaster.

...Also he's a shitposter.

(Sidenote, but I wish I had his hands. I would dearly love to be able to write that many words a day without my joints murdering me in cold blood lol)

Ursula from Kiki's Delivery Service: This one is kind of cheating (I couldn't think of a sixth who I thought was actually like me currently aksjfksjf), but she was one of the first characters I looked at as a kid and went "I WANT TO BE THAT :O" because she lives in the woods and gets to sketch crows!! And do art!!! All the time!!! I love her. So I am putting her here as a self indulgent hope that I will become like her someday!

#...I'm not sure what kind of impression of me this puts across #oh well askdfjksdfj #I rarely see characters that remind me of myself but I think that can be chalked up to me not being very good protagonist material lol #that said this was a very fun challenge! :D #tag game #senhart rambles

[rachelsfav-queer]

I just want to say thank you for creating vampravenwolf I love this ship so much and love the little space representation 💗

Aww, I really appreciate this. But, it wasn't all just me. A huge thanks to @caitlynsdog @stirthewaters @hellfiresmanicfae and all of the anons who have added their own little tidbits and given us questions, ideas, and prompts. Y'all have given us so much inspiration to keep this going and honestly, I have loved being a part of this so much.

Seriously, this has truly been just an indulgence for me to escape the absolute nightmare my life had become for a while. I love this ship so much as well and it's been exactly what I've needed to get me through everything. It has honestly been such an honor to work so closely with so many talented people. I know that this whole thing may not last forever, but it has been so nice interacting with everyone and I have enjoyed every minute of it.

And as for the little space representation, I never even intended for that lol. But I am endlessly honored, genuinely. You seriously have no idea how much that means to me, that I have been able to be a part of creating something that has made others feel seen in some way. That is all I have ever wanted for so long.

Genuinely, you've made me tear up. That's something I wanted when I was younger, to be seen. To have someone who understood. But, I never did and now I aim to give that to others. Knowing that I've given it to you? It makes me so happy.

So, thank you! Thank you to everyone who has been a part of this and helped make it what it is now. You've all helped me in ways I cannot describe.

So much love, Rachel <3

#anon ask #ask answered #rachel talks #vampravenwolf #baby wednesday #agere wednesday #age regression #sfw littlespace #thank you

[yxstxrdrxxm]

AND THATS A WRAP !

Hello, hello! It's me, the local dumbass that went "lol lets run this silly event" since January. I'd like to say thank you so much for participating!

I never thought that so many would look @ my blog event and go ":D lets go get matched w/ yans!" LIKE?? HELP WE GOT A LOT OF SUBMISSIONS SINCE DAY 1, IT MADE ME GO "oh shit" BAHAHAHAHA

But fr, I want to say thank you so much. To those who came in to join the matchup, to those who participated as anons to the story that was unfolding, and to those that were theorizing and even lurking:

Thank you so much for giving me a chance. You guys have no idea how much it means to me to celebrate this milestone with all of you.

I would love to mention everyone of y'all that joined to leave my special thanks, but this post will be lengthy if I did that and I... Am NOT about to make it too sappy LMAOOOO

Now! On the update + future plans:

The rest of the fics will be posted but slowly and will be saved as special dlc fics of One Last Call. This covers additional lore of the worldbuilding behind OLC, but there are some that won't be written (Freminet and Aether are unfortunately those I can't write as yanderes) to lessen the load. Also, some will be shorter/snippet wise, but we shall see.

I will be making a "story explained" post for OLC and the characters behind it. This goes into the possible "what ifs", the original draft of the story (storyboard lol), what each character would've been in my plans, and everything in between! (Also, there may or may not be drawn sketches for each of them. Maybe kek).

The next event will be happening on March. I won't elaborate what it'll be, but it will be indulgent and maybe a little funny (for me). It'll also last for a week at most so I don't end up burning myself out LMAOO

Finally, I will be hosting small event for Cupid, Eros, and Boss. They won't be big, but they will have their spots when I planned out what'll happen to them. (Hint: you guys are going to see them often on your feed if you know where to look ;>)

For now though, I will be finishing up the drabbles and pray I get them queued to finally archive this event. Also, I will be responding to asks + cleaning up my inbox again when I'm done :)

Once again, thank you everyone. I genuinely thought that running One Last Call will not work out back then (I told a few friends I was scared that it won't take off as it did), but I pushed through it anyway since I thought it'd be fun anyway. And to see everyone enjoy it is the best feeling I've had since opening this blog.

I hope all of you enjoy chilling as I try to write + post the drabbles for OLC before concluding its tale... And hopefully writer's block does not slam its gavel on my ass BAHAHAHAHAHA

#💌 ;; messenger writes #💌 ;; promising letter: one last call #💌 ;; to: my patrons #;; but fr im so happy everyone joined and #;; well #;; gave me a chance as a whole #;; i never thought olc would take off at ALL and it'd flop like the past events i ran on different blogs #;; and since ive hit 100 followers i wanted to make it special #;; so to see everyone enjoyed it even when... things happened #;; i am so. so happy. #;; genuinely overjoyed to see this work out the best it can. #;; y'all made me cry tears of joy ill be fr here BAHAHAHAHA SORRY IM SO SAPPY #;; BUT FR IM SO HAPPY #;; anyways ill shut up now #;; thank you. again. thank you so much for giving my silly event and me a chance to share my story. #;; im so happy you all enjoyed it to the point that y'all gave it support and the best ending i can offer. #;; and i hope that the next ones I'll be hosting will be fun for everyone to join in hehe

[vagabond-umlaut]

transmigrator, meet manipulator

Chapter 1 of functio laesa Gojo x Fem!Reader; Geto & Reader [platonic]; Canon Divergent AU; Isekai. Fluff & Angst & Drama & Humor; Reincarnation; Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies; Incredibly Self-Indulgent; Eventual Happy Ending; Eventual Friendships & Romance.

I've jumped on the Isekai bandwagon, y'all. [And I don't regret it one bit.] [Yet.]

Chapter warnings: Mentions of dying, accidents and panicking. Cult leader Geto.

Many ways exist for one to start a story.

They can write a duel. A confession. A query. A mansion. Or even introduce a character if they wanna.

But no.

You don't start your story any of these ways.

You start it by screeching. Then fainting.

If not totally, quite a bit– oh, who are you even kidding– you're totally freaking out, girl.

****

Dying is sad.

Sadder if you're dying with so many dreams unfulfilled.

Saddest if you're dying in one world, only to find yourself in another world, before realising you'll die [again] in this new world.

Sounds like one hell of an overdramatic overreaction, right?

It won't when your eyes open to a person with black eyes and black hair and bangs. Next move to the 2014 in bold on the wall calendar. Then finally fall on the traditional Buddhist monk robes worn by him... Oh, no way in hell—

A terrified shiver racks through your body; you try your best to hide it as you smile politely at the man.

"Um, hey."

Geto looks at you blankly for a while longer, before cracking a genial smile. In another universe, he would have made an excellent actor, you're sure.

"How are you feeling now?" he asks warmly, moving from the sofa to the chair beside your bed; you really wish he didn't, "You sure do look much better than when I found you."

"I'm better now," you reply, still smiling despite not really wanting to. Then add, wanting to continue your tirade of politeness as a survival tactic, "Thanks for bringing me to the hospital, by the way. I'm sure I would've bled out from my injuries if not for you. Thank you, Geto-san."

Whatever response you might have expected, a pair of wide eyes certainly wasn't a part of them. Geto looks at you, baffled, for another moment, before coughing up a visibly startled chuckle.

"Ah, there's no need to thank me, Miss. I was simply doing what I deemed right. Though I must say..." He trails off for a beat, before resuming, a smirk playing on his features, "I'm pleasantly surprised to see you interact with me so freely. I was thinking you might run for the hills on waking up and seeing me the first thing, from the way you screamed at me earlier today."

"Haha, sorry," you say sheepishly, not knowing how to form a seemingly legit reply.

You definitely cannot say you were scared shitless then, seeing a 2D character in the flesh. Even more for it being the genocidal villain from your favourite anime movie. No, you definitely cannot even utter that.

You ultimately decide to settle for something half-truth-y, "I was terribly shocked then, I think. Not in the right mental space after being hit by a vehic–"

A ringtone cuts you off in the middle of your strained apology. For the first time in your life [lives?], you feel happy for being interrupted while speaking. The man plucks his phone out, wrinkles folding his forehead as he glances at the screen. Only to cut the call in the next instant, shooting you a contrite smile as he rises from his seat.

"Sorry to cut short our little talk, Miss," The man sounds genuinely apologetic; you know better though, "But I'm sure we'll meet again. Soon enough. There are many questions I need you to answer, you see."

"Of course, Geto-san," you chuckle, sagging in relief inside when he finally, frigging finally, steps towards the door. And quite possibly– no, definitely out of your life too. 'Cause there's no way in hell you will let him meet you again. New world or not, you know you have to AND YOU WILL get as far as possible from this–

Geto pauses. One hand on the doorknob. Head twisted slightly to show you a closed-eye smile.

"I never introduced myself once tonight," he hums, "nor did I find you on a road. I found you in the middle of a deserted forest."

A second passes. Or maybe ten. Or maybe sixty. You don't know. You're too busy panicking to know.

Your savior's [more like, future slaughterer's] smile grows impossibly wider. The air feels impossibly colder.

"Goodnight Miss," he says, opening the door. The lights from the room spill into the dark corridor outside. "We will meet again."

'Looks-like-a-cinnamon-roll-but-will-kill-you' Geto and 'Looks-like-a-cinnamon-roll-and-is-a-very-jumpy-one' Reader.

What can ever go wrong?

Divider by @benkeibear. Header from Pinterest. I don't own the characters used here.

#gojo x reader #gojo x you #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x you #jjk x reader #jjk x you #kit posts 📝

[captainmera]

Hello Hello! I read through your golden brother fic amd got caught up a few days ago! Wanted to say that it's absolutely PHENOMENAL! You explore hunter's dynamics with the cast so well, it's really beautiful! The way you handle vee makes me cry tears of joy, it's literally EVERYTHING I wished was covered in season 3, i love this identity crisis-ridden slug so much you have no clue 💚💚 It's like catharsis while also excelling in its own right 😭 so so effervescent

Also, Jacob???? NEVER expected anyone could (or would) take such a one-off guy and make him so interesting! Im loving the self-righteous parallels drawn between him, belos, and luz, and how all three of them go about handling that. it's very intriguing and I'm excited for how it turns out. 🤔🤔

It's very important that you know the palismen wanting to be in the microwave is the funniest thing ever, I start cry laughing whenever the Beep. shows up. And hunter gradually getting more lenient about it??? Like he's so done but also?? It's in line with his development in the story??? Slowly unlearning the behaviors instilled in him that perpetuate his paranoia and growing to be more relaxed and happy?? Represented by an adorable running gag??? PHENOMENAL work. Absolutely amazing.

sorry for the long ask I just really like this fic & thought you should know. k thx have a good one 👍

GOLDEN BROTHER FANFIC <- He is talking about this.

Sweet titan, thank you!! (TTATT)!!!

And don't worry about long texts or rants!! I like it! %D <3333 It's fun! Aaaaaanyway...!!!

BIG RAMBLE (and some fanfic related doodles) BENEATH THE CUT!

That's so kind of you asdfghj I really appreciate it!! I love storytelling and character focused stories/plot/themes, and writing this fanfic has been a really nice exercise for me to indulge in that.

I'm making a story of my own which is also character driven! So, again, it's really nice to stretch my legs in writing too. :)

I'm glad you think so highly of my fanfiction!! I really wish a season 3 could've happened!! It's been fun trying to juggle all the characters and set them up for their own arcs.

Yes!! I feel like a lot of the show was building up a lot of themes to identity, finding yourself, loss/grief (of various kinds: Loss of family, loss of oneself, etc). But also showing the opposite theme: Of finding yourself, relief, peace and acceptance. Even moving onwards.

Themes that Vee represents/embodies really well - especially as a shapeshifter.

I think, for one, Hunter and Luz was supposed to have opposite arcs. Hunter finds himself and Luz loses herself. They would balance, thematically, off of one another. While still keeping Luz' struggle as the main character as the force to move the plot along; Hunter's arc only getting spotlight to support/dual Luz journey/decline/rise.

Taking the season three episode titles, I lean on the "for the future" one the most, as I think Luz dealt with a lot of doubt about where she fits in and what she can provide going forward (both for herself and her friends/family).

And I think Jacob would've been an interesting character. As much of a gag he is, he does represent certain aspects of both Luz and Belos.

He wants to be the chosen one (like both of them) and he wants to do something for his town (save it from witches, like Belos), and he wants to fit in with his community (like Luz) and can't quite find a way to do so. Perhaps even losing sight of what is going right in his life in favour of the grander greater thing (like both Belos and Luz) - That if they don't fit in with normal, perhaps it needs to be abnormal, and grand, and epic.

..... I mean I say all that, the difficulty is pulling it off lmao asdfghj ||||||OTL|||||

AND THANK YOU FOR NOTICING THAT'S WHAT THE GAG IS ABOUT. I'm genuinely surprised people liked the gag so much, I was worried only I would think it was funny haha, but it also pleases me you picked up on it's purpose :'D I love that all I have to write is *Beep.* and y'all know what's happening. :'DD

*cries*

thank you I really needed a nice message today (ToT)/ <333

#ask #asks #toh ask #art reply #toh fanfiction

[spaceratprodigy]

OC Superlatives Tag Game

Thank you for the tag @the-lastcall 💖💫

The Favorite

I don't think this comes as a surprise to anyone. Faith is so very dear to me she is quite literally a part of myself. She brings me so much comfort and has been an outlet for me for the past like? 3 years?? Gosh look at how far she's come. She helps remind me that everything is going to be okay.

The Oldest

While technically I have some ocs that are even older than her, Cookie is my first self insert lmao. Nowadays I don't think any but a couple of y'all would even know who she is and that makes me a lil sad! She's very special to me and was very beloved by people who meant a lot to me. Very few know me and her story well enough to see how on the nose it is an escape from my own life. Not shown here but she has burn scars on her right wrist/forearm. An exaggeration of my own burn scar in the same place. Cookie has always been there as a way to not feel alone, to see myself in someone who has been through similar experiences and made it out through the other side. To remember why it's so important to keep fighting.

The Newest

Okay maybe not the newest.. but Iris is the newest oc I've actually been putting a lot of time and love and effort into! I love her a lot! I know I still don't talk abt her as in depth as I would like to but I swear she's got more going on than I share. I just can't help wanting to draw her so self-indulgently full of love all the time, it makes me happy to have silly fun! I really really have been meaning to doodle her more vulnerable and serious moments because she's got a lot of grief in her heart she isn't letting out.

The Meanest

I suppose she was going to have to make her debut sooner or later.. okay but I genuinely don't have much to say abt Poppy. She's been a priv exclusive oc for a lil while and she's not developed.. like.. at all.. I ramble about her a LOT but I'm also literally every day scrapping everything bc my ideas are constantly changing so she's fr not ready yet lmao. Even I don't fully know what her deal is yet! But I can confirm she is the most ruthless (should I admit she's my lowkey nuka-world raider oc I made specifically to fuck Porter Gage nasty as hell likeeeee)

The Softest

Maril is my BABY!! She does not have a mean bone in her body and the closest she'll ever get is when she's defending her friends! She's so generous, she wants to help others any chance she gets and sees the best in everyone.

The Most Standoffish/Aloof

Faith is quite reserved, honestly. Becoming Captain wasn't exactly the life she chose for herself but it was the role she had to take on. For Phin, for her crew, for Halcyon, it was something she would grow to take seriously in time. She doesn't like to let on just how stressed and overwhelmed she is until she crashes and burns and has to be forced to rest before her stomach ulcer incapacitates her (speaking from experience, it's excruciating). When allowed to, she's pretty quiet and keeps to herself. She was never exactly the most social person and struggled to maintain any sort of relationship with anybody. She'll eventually warm up to her crew and come out of her shell. Sometimes you just need to meet the right band of misfits who get you.

The Smartest

I swear this isn't just me tooting my own horn. I genuinely built her character favoring her intellect and charm. Her highest levels were in engineering, science, and medical. She's got a head on her shoulders, and she's often pretty lost in it. Faith loves to build and tinker with things and loves reading and learning as much as she can. One her own comforts, really. Maril and Iris aren't necessarily too far off on this one, Faith just has a little more under her belt. (Maril is also dedicated almost exclusively to being a gummi ship mechanic and Iris is best at carpentry!)

The Dumbest

Poppy is by no means a moron and shouldn't be underestimated. But her skills and knowledge are very strong in fighting and survival. She does however qualify as my dumbest oc here because.. she was my melee heavy idiot savant build! Girl never at any point got a single level put into her INT lmao.

The One I'd be Friends With

Hands down Maril would be the bestest friend I could ask for. She would be so sweet and considerate and let's be real.. I'd want to also work on the gummi ships with her. I love my gals but I just know Maril would be a ray of sunshine and a great friend. She'd also love to listen to me talk abt all my own projects and we could build so many cool things together..

#this was super fun I've been wanting to work on it for a while but!! i wanted cool lil oc banners too #okay it's super late and I should def be sleeping so I'm gonna pass tf out as soon as I hit the post button fr fr #hopefully everything I wrote was coherent lmao I try to save these for when I'm actually awake but I was too excited to finally work on it #ocs #captain of the unreliable #sole survivor #maril highwind