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jtl-fics · 8 months

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Fluent Freshman - Part 39

Nicky screamed as he found himself yanked from his bed as he fell to the ground. The blanket that he had so perfectly burrito’d himself in had been pulled and he had gone with it pillows and all. He laid on the ground blinking up into the darkness wondering what the hell had just happened, he squints and thinks he sees blond hair. He racks his still loading brain to try and think of anything he had done recently to Aaron that would result in such a rude awakening.

The lamp clicks on.

“Nicky, are you- Andrew, what the hell.” He hears Aaron’s voice from the left and now Nicky can see the black armbands of his other cousin.

That tracks.

“Flight 8329 from Charleston International Airport to Seattle Tacoma International Airport took off 20 minutes ago.” Andrew says as if that means anything to Nicky.

“Cool?” Nicky squints at his cousin.

“There was an hour delay due to a staffing issue, but it is off the ground now.” Andrew continues and Nicky continues to not understand what is being said to him.

“Great?” Nicky hears Aaron.

There is silence in the room and Nicky finds himself starting to drift back to sleep. The floor really wasn’t that bad.

“So, Daniel’s not here anymore?” he hears Matt’s whispered question.

“Dude, why are you whispering?” Aaron asks.

“Smithsters still asleep.” Matt says voice still quiet.

“How the fuck did he sleep through Nicky’s banshee scream?” Aaron asks voice lowered down to a whisper.

“I think moving all his stuff wiped him out.” Matt offers.

“We moved everything he just said where he wanted it.” Aaron grouses quietly.

“You know Smithster isn’t much of a talker.” Matt reminds.

“Whatever.” Aaron huffs and Nicky is almost back asleep.

“Yes Matt,” Andrew says voice quieter than it had been when he had been rattling off facts about Daniel’s flight, “Daniel is not here anymore.” He says.

That is actually great news. Feels like a shame that FF didn’t wake up to hear it but Nicky knows that it wasn’t just the move that had wiped his friend out.

The last three days had been interesting.

First, Aras had flown back home. She had offered to stay longer with FF since Daniel was still around, but he had merely smiled and told her that he’d be okay. Nicky had almost cried when FF had said that he wasn’t alone anymore. Nicky’s heart twisted when the two decided that it was probably for the best that FF not come back to Washington for Winter Break.

Second, there had been the whole debacle where Daniel had shown back up with the man who had married FF’s mom. They had burst into the practice and had gone straight towards where FF was sitting sipping his ‘New and Improved Day/Boyd Smoothie’. Wymack had gotten between them before anything happened physically, but Nicky could still see how FF froze at the sight of his mother’s husband.

There had been raised voices, threats of security, demands on why ‘John’ hadn’t answered his phone to come bail his ‘brother’ out, that he’d forced his dad to come all the way across the country to bail his ‘brother’ out. FF had been quiet looking bored and unbothered by the tirade of the man who married his mother.

Wymack had been in rare form.

“He didn’t pick up because that phone is in my desk.” Wymack had hissed standing utterly stalwart between FF and the two men. “Now get the hell out of my Court before your son gets reacquainted with the Campus Police.” He points towards the exit.

FF’s Mother’s husband had demanded FF’s new phone number but neither Wymack or Smith gave it.

It was only as Wymack lifted his own phone up to his ear after having dialed campus security that the two got the hint and ran off.

Following that there’d been the expedited emergency restraining order request that had been pushed through.

Nicky and Wymack had been the ones that went with FF for support during the request since everyone else had a prior engagement. The security footage was all that had been needed to grant it as far as the judge was concerned despite FF’s Mother’s husband’s pleas that it was merely a ‘fight between brothers’.

Nicky had almost wished he had given Andrew the Maserati back when the jackass had shown up to the hearing with his son wearing a T-shirt that said ‘I’m not the step-dad. I’m the dad that stepped up.’

Oh.

He opens his eyes and tunes back into the conversation. It seems like Aaron had come to the realization that the only way that Andrew would be awake at this god forsaken hour of- Nicky looks at the alarm clock- 5 AM is because he’d been in the same bed as Neil who was a notorious early morning runner.

“You want the Maserati.” Nicky interrupts the whispered argument.

“No, I’m just here to comment on how Smith’s motorcycle helmet really ties the whole room together now that he’s moved in.” Andrew rolls his eyes so hard that even if Nicky hadn’t been looking at his cousin he would have heard the eyeroll. “Yes, I am here because it is now officially impossible for me to hit Daniel with my car. That was the deal.” Andrew says with a scowl, “So you are taking me to where you stored it.” He says.

“Andrew, it’s too early. They’re not open yet.” Nicky groans grabbing one of his pillows and trying to hide his face under it.

It was unsurprisingly ripped away before he could properly hide away from his cousin.

“We have to walk to wherever you hid my car.” Andrew hisses.

“Andrew you’re not seriously going to make me get up and walk the whole way there on the first morning that I can sleep in.” Nicky groans.

“This wouldn’t be happening if you hadn’t stolen my car Nicholas.” Andrew hisses.

“You guys can take my truck.” Matt says with a huge yawn as he settles back into bed. Morning practice for the rest of the week was not mandatory.

“See, we can take Matt’s truck. The place is only a 30 minute drive away and it doesn’t open until 7 AM anyways.” Nicky groans and tries to roll under the bed. If he can get to the far side then it will be difficult for Andrew, with his 5 foot nothing height to reach-

Andrew puts a foot between him and freedom.

“This room is buying Neil and I breakfast.” Andrew says, “And then we’ll go pick up my car.” He says.

“What? Why?!” Matt and Aaron demand as Nicky groans still trying to roll under the bed despite Andrew’s unyielding foot.

“You all either knew about Nicky’s plan or were part of Nicky’s plan.” Andrew says.

“Okay but Smithster is innocent.” Matt says.

“True, but we need him to come.” Andrew says.

“Why?” Nicky groans changing direction to try and roll under Aaron’s bed only to be stopped by the absolute barrier that was Katelyn’s suitcases of off-season clothes she kept under Aaron’s bed since her own room didn’t have space for it all.

“So we can get into the breakfast place now instead of the usual time for people our age. The owner loves him.” He says.

Ah, FF’s old lady magnetism.

Nicky gets it.

The boy has very pinchable cheeks.

There are very few things one can do when faced with an Andrew Minyard who has decided upon something. Eventually their whole room was up though Andrew at least was far more gentle with FF than he had been with Nicky. FF could sleep through almost any amount of noise but would wake up at the slightest touch and go still.

Nicky really wishes that Andrew had a less conspicuous car because he’s sure his cousin could have gotten away with running Daniel over if he had a Volvo or a Ford.

Nicky went with FF on the back of his motorcycle. One of Aras’ parting gifts to him had been an orange helmet with ‘Foxy’ written on it. Nicky had loved it immediately and unironically. Nicky held onto FF and hoped that his friend was awake enough to actually be driving on the damn thing, but FF had seemed at least 90% conscious.

Either way they arrived at the breakfast place FF was pushed to the front to speak with the owner of the fancy breakfast spot and within 10 minutes they were at a table surrounded by the elderly early bird patrons.

The all-you-can-eat brunch was always both a challenge and a danger when you are a group of college athletes. A challenge because it always felt a bit like a race against the chefs who were churning out chicken, waffles, hams to slice, eggs of all varieties, bacon, sausages, French toast, cinnamon rolls, hashbrowns, quiche, pancakes, biscuits and gravy, and lox bagels. The danger was what Matt was currently finding himself in since the man had failed to pace himself. “I think I’m gonna die.” Matt groaned.

“Smith, where did you get that smoothie?” Aaron asks looking as FF was sipping a delightful looking smoothie.

“The owner gave it to me while you guys were filling your plates.” FF says. “I’m supposed to let her know if I need another one.” He says.

“When are you going to be off that liquid diet?” Aaron asks as he digs into some bacon.

“Well, next week I can just start essentially putting things in the blender and I shouldn’t suffer the consequences like with the borscht.” FF shrugs. “Gran said she’d send along a pie to celebrate when I can eat solids again.” He adds and FF’s face is as blank and as unemotional as it usually was but there was a general air of sadness.

“You know, I don’t think it’d bother Allison or any of the girls if you joined us for winter break.” Matt says from where he was staring up at the ceiling still overfull from going too hard too fast on the egg options.

“I don’t want to intr-“

“It’s not an intrusion.” Andrew says looking at his phone, “We’re inviting you.” He adds before getting up and grabbing his backpack, “Do not let them take my plate.” He says looking at the table. Andrew’s plate was laden with the sweeter side of things for breakfast and he had made up a plate for Neil who was supposed to meet them at the breakfast spot.

Andrew left and nicky figured he was going to go grab Neil outside. “Isn’t it for the original Foxes?” FF asks.

“Yeah, but you’re our friend so it’s fine if you come. I know Dan wants to really get to know the guy who took her place on the line.” Matt says with a laugh that has him looking queasy afterwards.

“You and me can room together.” Nicky says.

“Isn’t Erik coming?” Aaron asks incredulously.

“Yeah? So?” Nicky questions.

Aaron looked at Nicky like he was an idiot and opened his mouth likely to say why, “I don’t want to intrude. I can probably just sleep on a couch out in the main area, if your friends are okay with me coming.” FF sips at his drink. “You and Erik have a lot to catch up on.” He says voice giving that slight indication that he felt awkward.

Catch-up on-

Ohhh.

Yeah, he and Erik are going to christen that bed if it hasn’t already been christened.

“We’ll figure something out.” Aaron says easily enough.

Eventually Andrew returned with Neil in tow. He was a little sweaty looking but definitely look like someone who had been running for about two hours at this point. He figures that Andrew must have brought spare clothes for Neil to change into so that he’d be acceptable in the breakfast joint.

“Smith has agreed to join us for Christmas Break.” Nicky announces to the couple as they took their seats.

“Quite brave of Smiths considering how the last holiday break went when he came with us.” Aaron says wrly.

“Yeah Andrew, make a deal not to stab Smithy again.” Nicky holds out a pinky for a pinky promise with his cousin.

Andrew rolled his eyes as FF piped in, “Romero stabbed me.” He says loyally.

Eventually they got to talking about their plans for the Winter Banquet on Friday. Nicky was going with FF as his date and had already gone out and gotten him an appropriately bespoke suit with Aras the week before.

Eventually they wrap up breakfast. Nicky, Aaron, and Matt all pay and they make their way out to the parking lot.

The parking lot where the Maserati was.

“Andrew, how in the world-“

“Like a locked gate would even slow Neil down. Got the opening time and the driving distance from you this morning and narrowed it down to the only long-term parking lot in the area.” Andrew says idly as Neil hands over the spare Maserati keys to him.

Nicky spends a bit more time bitching about the fact that Andrew woke them all up mostly out of spite and as a cover for getting his car back without Nicky’s assistance. However eventually the time for class swiftly approached.

“This isn’t over!” he says pulling on his Foxy Helmet and pointing at Andrew.

“I think it is.” Andrew replies with a shrug as he and Neil climbed into the front of the car.

Nicky rolled his eyes but climbed onto the back of FF’s motorcycle.

Winter Banquet was in 2 days.

MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU

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hoofpeet · 2 years

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replacement ingo au. unova popularity poll. finally, emmet thinks, a good thing. surely he has first place in the bag, with his brother being replaced by a pokemon. he gets second. To his dog. rip.

He just can't win </3😔 Ingo's so fuckable that even the shapeshifter mimicking him wins the popularity polls

#hoof draws #replacement ingo au #sugar's on that hot girl shit

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unfinishedslurs · 1 year

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Established Stoncy (Eddie POV) (ot4 stoncy+steddie)

“Have you heard from Jonathan lately?” She asks quietly.

“He’s been avoiding me as much as you, Nance.” He hears Steve’s hitched breath as she works, and sees her brush a soothing hand along his shoulder. Isn’t she supposed to be dating that guy they’re talking about? How can she talk about him with Steve so casually, like she’s not a hop skip and a jump from cheating on her boyfriend?

“I don’t know what I did wrong.”

“Hey, you didn’t do anything,” Steve says, and there’s so much fucking love in his voice Eddie has to squeeze his eyes shut. “He’ll come around, you know that. He’s just got to work through…whatever he’s working through first.”

“I don’t get why he’s avoiding you too. It’s like…”

“He’s not. He wouldn’t.”

“He did before,” she says, sounding vulnerable.

“I think we all agreed he was being stupid back then,” Steve says. “Like, me level idiot, and he doesn’t even have the brain damage to back it up. He’ll talk to us.”

“That’s not funny.” She pauses, and Eddie can see her clinging onto Steve’s words like a lifeline. “You think so?”

“I know so.”

She stands on her tiptoes to kiss him on the forehead, and Eddie turns away, pretending like he wasn’t eavesdropping on their private conversation.

"I don't know what happened between you two but... I'd get her back man. Whatever it takes. 'Cause that — that was as unambiguous a sign of true love as these cynical eyes have ever seen."

Steve’s mouth quirks, and he looks almost amused when he glances at Wheeler. Before he can respond, the ground rumbles, and they both stumble.

“I’m not the only one who sees what's going on there, right?” He asks quietly, gesturing between the two lovebirds.

Robin looks…caught, all the sudden, like he found her putting itching powder in his underwear. He doesn’t understand it.

“Uh, yeah,” she says, strangled. “They’re, y’know, umm…”

He doesn’t understand why she’s acting so weird about this. Maybe Steve and Nancy had a bad break, years ago, but they’re clearly still into each other. It’s not like it’s out of the ordinary for two attractive, straight—

Ah.

“So, Nancy?”

“What?”

“She’s pretty,” he offers, and Robin nearly trips on her face.

“Do you—“

“No,” he says, and glances pointedly at Steve. “She’s, uh, not my type.”

“Oh?” She asks, and then comprehension dawns on her face. She looks between him and Steve, and her eyes widen. “Oh!”

“Yeah, oh,” he says. “So, like, I get it.”

“Get…it…” She blinks, and then realization settles across her face. “Oh, I don’t—-“ she cuts herself off. “I mean, yeah, no, Nancy’s like, super pretty. The prettiest. And a total badass, it’s like, insane. That’s why I’m…crushing…on her.”

She winces at her own awkwardness, and Eddie nods in support. It’s always weird to talk about it so openly. But hey, if you can’t do it in a hell dimension with no people, where can you talk about it?

“Maybe she likes girls,” he offers up, even though he doubts it. You never know.

Robin’s subsequent coughing fit is so violent both Nancy and Steve turn around to check on them.

“Rob?” Steve asks, hovering. “You okay?”

“I’m good,” she wheezes. Eddie awkwardly pats her back, and tries to pretend it’s not his fault. From the side-eye Nancy sends him, he only partially succeeds. Finally she takes one last gulp of air, and stands up straight.

“So, Nancy!” She says brightly. “Guns, right?”

She takes Nancy’s arm and scurries off without a second look back at him, which is understandable. It takes time to talk about things like this.

“What was that about?” Steve asks, falling into step with him.

“Nothing.”

“Right.” Steve gives him a look, which he pretends not to see.

Steve is on babysitting duty when the car pulls up to the extremely beat up cabin Eddie’s been forced to hide in.

They both tense, but Steve looks outside and sighs in relief. “It’s Nance’s car,” he confirms, and helps Eddie hobble outside. Eddie’s putting a hand on the bannister to balance himself when a vaguely familiar figure stumbles out of the drivers seat.

“Jonathan!”

Steve is practically a blur running past him, slamming into Byers and spinning him around. Wasn’t he just helping Nancy cheat on this guy? How can they just—

All his thoughts screech to a halt as soon as Byers takes Steve’s face in his hands and kisses him.

And keeps kissing him.

And Steve, King Steve, definitely not gay Steve, kisses back. Full on holding him by the waist, pulling him in until their entire bodies line up. As if letting go would make Byers disappear in a nice little poof of smoke.

Wow, Eddie thinks deliriously, holding onto the porch for dear life. These painkillers are no joke.

Nancy comes out of the car next, beaming as her boyfriend makes out with a man right in front of her. A man she was clearly cheating on her boyfriend with.

Unless he’s not actually her boyfriend. Is she a beard? Is she bearding Jonathan? Is Steve cheating on Jonathan with his beard?

He’s starting to think he’s missing a few pieces to this puzzle.

“Um.”

The two lovebirds break apart, and all three of them fix Eddie with a wary look as they register the fact that yes, he is standing there and has been the whole time, thank you very much. Byers is holding Steve’s hand like a challenge, glaring at Eddie like he’s daring him to say something. As if Eddie isn’t the gayest motherfucker in Hawkins.

“Right,” Steve coughs. “Jonathan, this is Eddie. He’s cool, he saved Dustin’s life. Eddie, this is Jonathan. My…uh. My boyfriend.”

Eddie stares. Nancy comes up and takes Jonathan’s other hand. “Our boyfriend,” she corrects. “We’re together. All three of us.”

“Oh,” he says. This is awkward. This is so awkward, Eddie can feel the trees wilting in embarrassment for him. Maybe if he’s lucky it’ll turn out he’s standing in quicksand or another portal will open up beneath his feet and he won’t have to deal with this awkwardness anymore.

Steve likes boys. Good! Great! It would be fucking amazing if he didn’t apparently have a boyfriend. A boyfriend who is standing there in the flesh, silently giving Eddie the biggest stink eye of his life like he’s ready to throw down if he says the wrong this and oh God Eddie still hasn’t said anything-

“Congrats?”

Byers blinks. “Congrats?”

“Yeah, man,” Eddie says, as if he wasn’t just trying to get Nancy to break this dude's heart for Steve like two days ago. God, that’s so embarrassing. They’re already together. “You’ve got pretty good taste. Your charisma stats must be off the roof.”

If he remembers anything from high school that’s definitely a lie, but a little flattery never hurt anyone.

Steve barks out a laugh, Nancy rolls her eyes, and Byers stares at him like he’s grown two new heads. “You’re Eddie,” he says, sounding it out.

Eddie spreads his arms. “In the flesh. Well, mostly. I’m missing some chunks of it.”

“DND Eddie? From Hellfire?”

“Did they not tell you anything? Harsh, Wheeler. I thought you liked me.”

“Wrong Wheeler,” Byers says. “Mike wouldn’t shut up about you. Two days straight in a pizza van after we got the news of what you’d done, and I was ready to rip my hair out.”

Aww, that’s cute. He honestly likes the kid, even though Dustin has been thrust firmly into the “favorite” category, on the basis of nearly dying in his arms and probably traumatizing the kid forever. He’s glad the sentiment is returned.

“You don’t even know the half of it,” Steve snorts as he starts dragging his partners towards the cabin. “Did you notice he only started growing his hair out after he met Eddie?”

“Wait, really?” Eddie asks as Steve snags him by the wrist and pushes him in front. Like a long, awkward, queer train. Is Nancy queer? Can he ask? Are they at that stage in their friendship? Does that come before or after fighting monsters together?

Nancy laughs harder than he knew she was capable of. “Oh my god, he did! I didn’t even realize!”

“Uh, yeah, because you didn’t have to hear day in and day out from that little shit how much cooler he is than me. Dude, did you know they thought you were scary? You?”

Eddie’s touched, honestly. He put a lot of work into terrifying the masses. “I am scary,” he says. “I fucking shredded along to Metallica to stop a demon from killing us all. I’m more metal than I ever was.”

“Yeah but you’ve also got those, like, doe eyes, man.” Steve waves a hand as if he’s not making every wire in Eddie’s brain short circuit, and tugs them all down on the couch.

“I have what now?”

Nancy giggles, leaning around her boyfriends to try and poke his cheek. He snaps his teeth at her.

“Don’t you know? Steve’s weak to big, soulful eyes,” she says, batting her own eyes in emphasis. Byers rolls his, which are also big and brown and kind of wet, now that Eddie’s paying attention.

“Nancy,” Steve whines, “don’t tell him that!”

“Sorry.” She doesn’t sound sorry, grinning as she practically sits in Byers’s lap to give Steve a peck. He watches them with the kind of fondness that Eddie’s always kind of dreamed of having directed at him, and it punches deep.

So Steve isn’t cheating on anyone and probably never will, which is a relief and also a bummer to some of the more pathetic fantasies he’s whipped up in the past few days trapped in this cabin. He likes Nancy too much to ever actually get in the way of her true love, but it doesn’t hurt to dream.

“Yeah, okay, I have big ol’ Bambi eyes or whatever. You wanna talk kiddie crushes and hero worship, how about Sinclair?”

“What about him?” Steve asks, apparently oblivious.

“Uh, how about the whole basketball thing?”

Steve’s brow furrows. “He loves basketball!” He protests. “He asked me to practice with him when he first started thinking about joining the team, we still go out and play sometimes.”

“Uh huh,” Eddie says. “And how about the time I said something about your fight with Hargrove, and he jumped to your defense even faster than Dustin could about how badass and cool and handsome you were?”

“There’s no way he said that,” he says, turning bright red. “There’s—no. Billy was going to hurt him, he was, like, fucking twelve or something, I couldn’t just…he didn’t say that.”

“Might as well have. That entire speech had me clocking the kid faster than you can say ‘touchdown.’”

“That’s football.”

“I’ll tell you what he’d like to ball—“ he starts, and Steve screeches.

“Shut up, shut up, don’t say that! He’s a baby, what is wrong with you—“

“That ‘baby’ already experienced his first hangover, mom. Time for little birdies to leave the nest.”

“You calling me mom makes it so much worse,” Steve tells him. “I should have left you to rot.”

“Probably!” He says brightly. “But that doesn’t stop the fact that Sinclair has a crush on you the size of Texas.”

“Jonathan,” Steve whines, burying his face in his hands, “make him stop.”

Byers pats Steve’s shoulder sympathetically. “Sorry, man, I thought you knew.”

“It was kind of obvious, Steve,” Nancy agrees. “He does ask to play basketball a lot. Especially on hot days.”

“What does the weather have to do with anything?”

“Shorts,” Nancy and Jonathan say together.

“How short?” Eddie asks. He should probably think about switching pockets, if he’s turned into this much of a masochist.

“So short,” Nancy says. “And he usually takes his shirt off halfway in, when he’s all sweaty.”

“Jesus, no fucking wonder. And he can’t blush either, can he? I’m starting to think he’s the smartest of the bunch.”

“Well, Byers?” Eddie spreads his arms, ignoring the trepidation in his gut. “Am I everything you expected?”

Byers tilts his head, looks at him with a gaze that could cut through bone. Eddie has a feeling the guy is finding out what every single one of his organs looks like, and he can’t tell if it’s a good or bad thing.

Finally he gives a sharp nod, like he’s decided something.

“I think if you stick around, the three of us are going to have to have a repeat of that conversation we had when I went to California,” he says, as if Eddie should know what the fuck that means. “You’re cool, man. Call me Jonathan.”

He blinks, mouth half open, and Byers’s-Jonathan’s mouth quirks.

“Conversation about what?”

Byers hums noncommittally, because apparently their entire trio is bent on making Eddie’s sanity take a jump off the quarry. “A lot of things,” he sighs, and sends Eddie a wry little smile. “I haven’t exactly been a very good boyfriend lately.”

Eddie’s feeling magimous enough to be honest. “They think the world of you, man. I heard them talking about you. They…shit, they really love you, you know that? I think you’re gonna be okay.”

#ot4 stoncy+steddie #sorry for the ronance bait but actually robin is just taking one for the team #steve would ABSOLUTELY spin jonathan around like a romance movie try and tell me otherwise #this can be read as jargyle as well sorry my man isn't in here he's busy doing hot girl shit #(calling suzie 'sally' in front of dustin for shits and giggles)#established stoncy+steddie au #stranger things fanfic #nancy wheeler #eddie munson #jonathan byers #steve harrington

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fauvester · 2 months

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daniel webster, who should have been the lord of wind, instead the ghost king of the netherwaters

+ gradient mapped with spooky green

#DARK DAN DARK DAN DARK DAN DARK DAN #tcgf au #youre out in your pleasure boat watching calhoun battle his latest heavenly disaster and you see this guy vibin ominously wyd #wanted to do more of a classic like lithograph look with the border… I think it turned out reasonably tasty #to match clay….#he is TRYING to get REVENGE but fucking NICK BIDDLE KEEPS SHOWING UP #hes got his earth master shovel. hes got the giant sea monsters that guard his island. hes doing hot girl shit #daniel webster #ryh on his boat seeing him in the distance like wow. wonder what that's not about. oh well probably not about me <3

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shima-draws · 1 year

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Thinks about Perry covered in the blood of his enemies and swoons

#LOGICALLY I know that actual killing probably isn't part of OWCA's philosophy. BUT. A girl can imagine in her head #Her blorbo fixing his bloody tie as he strolls out of a darkened room full of corpses.#IT'S POETRY. RIGHT??#Dealing with Doof is more like his dayjob. His REAL job is going out and doing crazy save the world shit #i.e. Stopping assassination plots. Doing his OWN assassination. Taking on several armed men at once.#Perry is basically Eggsy from Kingsman except mute. That's it that's the point I'm trying to make here #Or Harry. Either one works.#OR. Or. Loid Forger. DEFINITELY get Perry vibes from him.#Basically any hot secret agent who kills for a living that's what I'm. Yeah #Anyway in canon........er. In human Perry canon? He does not kill. He doesn't believe in that #Esp bc of parent trauma. AND bc if the boys ever found out Perry killed someone they'd never forgive him #He does have morals.#But in lesser canon. Non canon. AU of the AU. WHATEVER. He is capable of killing someone #Phin and Ferb would definitely be upset if they found out but they'd be slightly less upset to hear that Perry's only ever killed #truly EVIL people. Not 'evil' like Heinz. Actual scum of the earth kinds of people #Perry's like Loid and Yor combined. Clearing the earth of terrible awful people and also being a suave secret agent spy #Anyway I'm done now sorry I needed to ramble about that for a bit. LOL #PnF #Phineas and Ferb #Perry the platypus #Human Perry #Shima speaks

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threeawfulfruits · 9 months

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Somehow I have gone my entire life under the impression that Kingdom Hearts and Final Fantasy were the same thing

Cue me growing increasingly confused and disturbed for the first two hours of a FFXVI playthrough on YouTube as I watched graphic violence and sexual content play out on screen with the latent belief that Mickey Mouse was going to show up at some point...

#don’t eviscerate me #OBVIOUSLY I am not a gamer lol #I died laughing when I figured it out #idk I thought Chocobos were like a cutesy fantasy ostrich thing from KH so they and the art style were the (supposedly) common link #which was what confused me #fuck man #I’m so stupid #took me an hour to realize Clive wasn’t some AU version of Cloud Strife #tbf I’ve never seen any content for any of these games nor have I ever had any friends obsessed with them #literally my only context was old commercials from back when cable was a thing #on that note though holy shit what a game those graphics were sickkk #those fight sequences hot damn #and I’m glad Jill ended up with a LITTLE mfing agency because it’s not even REMOTELY a stretch to call that game intensely misogynistic #the few female characters tended to be weak or evil so no dice for me in general #some of the later characters were cool I liked the shipbuilder girl #Mid!!! yeah that was it #kingdom hearts #final fantasy #final fantasy xvi #ffxvi spoilers

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navree · 1 month

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you know if they didn't want us to root for the greens they shouldn't have 1) made all the members of team black both very boring and very stupid (or in daemon's case the most awful asshole to have ever lived in the kingdoms at this point in time) and 2) made all the members of team green desperately hot

#personal #house of the dragon #that entire side's collective face card has never declined #alicent? beautiful. aegon? ethereal. helaena? the prettiest girl. aemond? divine bone structure. criston? super hot. otto? rhys is a dilf.#(i mean hell even alys and larys are carrying on house strong hotness after harwin got barbecued)#(just cuz larys is a shit doesn't mean his actor is bad looking)#and honestly even the dragons especially when compared to the awful designs some of the tb dragons have #(caraxes is idk okay and syrax looks awful)#and meanwhile sunfyre? the it girl of westeros. dreamfyre? a queen. vhagar? gilf rights.#and again the only interesting member of team black is rhaenyra herself but i'm sorry she's also got two brain cells to rub together #this should be an easily winnable war for you but you made shit decisions for twenty years straight #and every character surrounding you is a plank of wood there is Nothing there #(why i'm writing my au where the dance is between rhaenyra and daemon and rhaenyra has more of the traditional greens on her side shhhhhhhh

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oozeandgoo-art · 9 months

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#transformers #af drag strip #af dragstrip #au: androidformers #humanformer #the text is not backwards on purpose butim pretending it is. hold it up to a mirror or something #he's built like that because i personally think it's hot and also because he would be frustrated he didnt have a Tiktoker Hot Girl Body #so like double win #his tattoos are shit they're like some random garbage he got off the internet. he definitely has like the chinese characters for 'bread' or #something tattooed on him and he thinks it says like. victory or something #hed be the guy to get matzoh tattooed on his arm and say it said strength #pov: your teammate is going to hollywood for a 2-day work trip and is pretending she is going to become a famous movie star in her time the

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ryuuryuuhoney · 2 years

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“Your majesty, you should take a break”

rough sketch and horrible colouring of the royal au: honey and her butler Myre (from @jackplushie)

Myre looking unamused because they know who honey is in person (a simp)

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst yuu #twisted wonderland yuu #twst oc #twisted wonderland oc #myre #honeyuu #honey ryuu #honey's royal au #honey #*hot girl shit* /j #idk man-#just trying-#still living-#somehow-

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gust-jar-simulator · 7 months

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[walks to center stage, snaps out a scroll, and lets the long end roll out to the floor]

Alright this idea is an excuse for me to be very silly but also have a good time. So. @kittyreaper, and the rest of the audience, please enjoy an unfiltered look at what I do when designing an AU and OCs within it.

Because I’m having fun and the initial post gave me ideas, I am calling this the Hot Girl Shit AU. Sometimes I have serious titles, today is not one of those days.

Initial idea: link here

Since Ganondorf’s design was somewhat based on either Zhu Bajie or Fudo Myo-o depending on the game, I wanted to carry some references to that over in Shadow’s design. He’s already got a very good and iconic manga design (purple hair and red eyes), but since I want to emphasize his connection to Ganon and mythic position as the heir of Din in this evil little triforce trio, I figure I can spice him up. Make him look Gerudo, possibly give him a high ponytail, etc.

Shadow was created by Ganon in FSA after he took possession of the Trident of Power and, as far as I can tell, used it somehow on the Mirror of Darkness. Combining a LttP reference and a Twilight Princess reference is indeed a powerful move. So, with Shadow newly resurrected and off the string, I feel like it would be funny to give him a plot device trident of mass destruction.

I am also severely tempted to give him sleeve tattoos that look like the inscriptions on the TP Mirror of Twilight. To my eternal disappointment, the script doesn’t actually say anything except maybe a misspelled “OPEN” repeated ad infinitum.

Next up: OoT Dark.

He’s the hot one. I want to lean on the fourth wall a little and acknowledge the fact that he was everyone’s fifth grade fictional emo boyfriend. Dark remains clueless, because he’s the reflection of a toddler trapped in a teenager’s body whose sole purpose was to duel, but clueless or not he’s still hot.

White hair, solid red eyes, black clothes, grey-black skin, you know the drill. Since he’s the representative of wisdom and water in the trio, as well as everything the Hero of Time is insecure about, he’s the obligatory Hylian of the group. Or at least he looks like one. Shadow manages to teach him enough shapeshifting to look less like a sleep paralysis demon, and he copies his hero fairly well (keeps the hair), but he still prefers demon form if he can afford it.

Later on in their adventures, because I like causing problems, he manages to update his “reflection” of the Hero of Time and steal the Fierce Deity’s look. In black, naturally. He mostly uses a dark copy of the Master Sword and the Hylian Shield though.

And then.

Last but certainly not least: Zelda 2, Link’s shadow, here nicknamed Nightmare.

Nightmare gives me a lot of room to play with since he’s mostly flat black pixels shaped like Link’s silhouette. I decided to base his design notes on what I imagine would give the Hero of Hyrule a heart attack, as well as natural inspiration he might get once Shadow explains the wonders of shapeshifting.

They’ve all got mostly grey-black default forms, even Shadow, but Nightmare takes the longest to switch his up. He’s got two major notes to start off with: Hyrule is terrified of bleeding, especially in public; and I imagine he’d be very secretive about his ability to turn into a fairy, out of fear of exploitation. Nightmare doesn’t wish him any ill will, and looked fairly plain during their duel, but during this second chance at life he starts going through a bit of a punk phase and indulging things his counterpart represses/would never do.

So! He shapeshifts freely into a little shadowy fairy whenever he wants, trailing sparks of darkness instead of fairy glitter. His fashion choices point to his fairy side as well as details of his boss room:

I decided one cool column is all the excuse I need to give him a knee-length chiton, also pulling in the neat drape texture of the curtains. His hair is that same light blue because I have a sense of humor. Skin tone mostly matches his counterpart and/or the tan bricks of the boss room, and while he likes to have red eyes to fit in with the other shadows they’ll also occasionally be the ominous magenta of his duel backdrop.

I have a theory that the fight might have taken place inside Hyrule’s mind, which is one explanation for why all the lights go out and then come back on the second he kills Nightmare. So Nightmare can have some spooky and currently undefined mind powers, as a treat. Also for extra fear points, he can have a Great Fairy form.

Hyrule is terrified of bleeding because his blood is a necessary ingredient for reviving Ganon. Nightmare doesn’t actually have the cursed blood, he’s just a nightmare, so he doesn’t have to worry about bleeding. If anything, he actually gets used to the idea of being an individual by just… bleeding at random for the aesthetic. It could be from anywhere, but a slice across the throat is a pretty good reference to what various monsters want to do to drain Hyrule. Nightmare is not only free of that burden, but he’s also a magical creature that can either cast illusions or just might be immune to bleeding out, so. He’s doing hot girl shit.

When he’s not in the mood to be intensely colorful, he’ll switch his hair and chiton to black, and his eyes will mostly stay red. His magic still has a weird magenta or ultraviolet tinge to it, though.

I will make another post at some point to cover my vague plot ideas because I have a hilarious concept to put forward. I’m hoping this post is coherent, I am Very Sleepy.

#hot girl shit au #dark link #shadow link #my writing

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josephsaturn · 4 months

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Star Wars au where the clones have fourth wall awareness

#I’m not sure if it’s like a ‘looks at the script’ fourth wall awareness or a ‘looks at the camera every once in a while’ awareness #star wars au #star wars #star wars the clone wars #it’s prob some bs with the cloning process #imagine a new dimension you had no idea existing popping into your head when that Jedi-looking guy pops in to find Jango #this in tcw would be hilarious; just #the Jedi/Padme/whichever person they’re dealing with: doing Hot Girl Shit (blowing up parliament or whatever)#the clones they’re with: (gives the camera a ‘yall seeing this shit’ look)

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sp1derc1der · 5 months

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To the Maxie fans nation, have this stupid comic I had to draw.

I love this idiot /aff

#dragon au #dragons #draco scaled au #digital art #pokemon au #dragon art #dragon!maxie #artists on tumblr #pouring rocket fuel into a volcano is some hot girl shit

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fauvester · 25 days

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demon king hot girl shit HC

#hmmm. still not jazzed with this one. but giving it a go #tcgf au #drinking. enjoying his endless party. planning for his new mansion. literally hot girl shit!

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theangrypomeranian · 1 year

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Not me thinking of my next multi chapter project after Baby Steps 🙈

#sally speaks #okay but hear me out #single girl dad!Zeke and librarian!Tina AU #zeke moved away during high school and tina hasn't seen him in years #tina now runs the library in town and Louise is running the restaurant (duh)#summer starts and Tina is doing children's activities at the library when suddenly a gorgeous dad and his adorable daughter are there #and holy shit it's Zeke and he's hot and his kid is cute and polite and Tina is single #i think y'all get the gist :3 #single girl dad au #zekina

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mushroom-for-art · 11 months

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I should be writing shadow au oops, I'm sorry I am working on it slowly but these guys possessed me I wanted Syn to menace May and them chat about aus my brain is bouncing around XD enjoy! (Syn belongs to @seasidemew)

More multiverse shenanigans

May should've been working. May HAD been working, until the larger mewtwo decided to descend upon her. She could feel the warmth of his chest on her back as he leant over and into her body, arms wrapped around her his tail lightly hitting the floor as he purred quietly.

"Can I help you Syn?" She asked slightly amused by this sudden affection but also it was rather inconvenient.

"Mm…" He hummed softly, "No, I'm just glad you're so small and cuddly here." She sighed softly, feeling him give her a little squeeze like she was some plush teddiursa.

"Which world did you find out about then? Perfect or Poached?" She asked simply already aware of the many vast variations of herself and knowing those were the most recent and the only ones so far that played with her height. His tail stopped lightly thumping.

"What's poached.." She could tell by his tone he didn't know what it was and felt a bit of panic settle in.

"...oh you know..like with eggs…" May deflected keeping her eyes on the very interesting tiles on the floor.

"May. What happens in Poached." Syns arms shifted subtly to more restrain her preventing her from trying to duck or wiggle away but still remaining quite cuddly. She made a bit of a whine bringing a hand to cover her mouth as she mumbled.

"Ikindamaybegetcaughtinadarkball," she mumbles unintelligibly into her palm, his weight leans down more into her making her exhale softly in an oof.

"Careful big fella I can't support your whole weight!"

"Well I can't hear you when you're mumbling so I gotta lean closer," more of his weight presses down and she makes a slightly panicked 'ack' in response to his antics as he simply chuckled.

"Who the hell let you watch lilo and stitch alright give give a bit I can't talk like this," his weight lessens on her back as she sighs exaggeratedly before awkwardly fiddling with her hands.

"I get caught by poachers, caught in a dark ball..hence the name.."

"A, dark ball?" She audibly sucked air through her teeth at his question, hesitating on telling him.

"it's uh..type of pokeball poachers use…Darkness says the technology used is quite impressive actually, has a similar function to a master ball can capture any Pokemon instantly," she felt his weight shift, "hey I'm getting there!"

"You're stalling," His voice was a playful singsong.

"I know I'm stalling!" She emptily shouted back, "it's, not fun to talk about," her voice awkwardly quietened and she felt his weight lessen and heard a soft apology, she sighed, "the dark ball…it can enhance a pokemons original ability bringing it to it's highest possible level augmenting them to be even better than they were originally.."

"Why would that make you bigger?"

"Because I'm, not," she struggled for words, "apparently I have potential and I was meant to be tall and powerful and the dark ball artificial unlocks and forces that version of me into my most powerful state.." She didn't want to talk about the how it did that though. She felt him gently squeezing her body again but more as a hug.

He hung his head down a little besides her eyes screwed tight and she gently put her hand to his head rubbing the side of it comfortingly as he experienced new memories from across the multiverse.

"You're, yea, I see it, you're brutal.." He mumbles a bit as the new memory of the fighting ring enters her head.

"I guess so…guess being forced to max level does that..sorry about knocking you about so much." Memories of a fight began to form in both their heads as the new world grew and they became aware of it.

"Oh it's fine, it's kinda hot actually you're efficient," He chuckles, lifting his head up a bit to smirk at her playfully moving to gently bonk his head against hers to which she made a mock 'ow'.

"How come you hesitate on landing the match ending blow?" He furrows his brows at his memory.

"Because I don't want to hurt another mewtwo, not really, guess seeing your bloody bruised face was enough to get past the dark balls influence. Must have a thing for bloodied up pretty boys. Well gives you enough time to strike and then kick my ass." She laughed softly as he guiltily chuckled.

"Yeah I'm sorry, I really saw an opportunity and took it."

"Hey we were in a fight, i'd rather you won especially with your history." He hums above her gently squeezing her again.

"You, escape all that right? I don't recall seeing you again."

"Yea, I get out.. Thanks for asking, nice to know you care." He chuckled softly.

"I can care a bit!" She laughed a squeal as he squeezed her again, picking her up a bit before putting her down as he sighed softly in guilt, "I, actually learnt about the other one, Perfect was it? I'm, sorry for how I act there..I hear you saying you don't want to fight. I can see you dodging and avoiding fighting back and." He signed again, "all I can think about is how good it'll feel and how loud the audience will cheer when I take down such a big powerful opponent." She felt him squeeze her in guilt and moved her hand again to carefully hold the side of his face.

"Hey..its okay I get it I understand why, maybe I don't understand there at first but here I understand and I've hit you pretty hard and brutally before myself, I can't hold a grudge."

"You always fight like that to protect others or as a last ditch self preservation thing, it's not the same."

"What would've happened had you lost?" He went quiet in thought, turning his head away at the new suggested memories of losing and the fall out of it.

May was quiet as her hand moved once more to hold his face as he pressed into her touch knowing without him having to say that it would've been bad and although he did it for himself there was also a level of survival to it. She felt him purr softly against her hand.

"Feeling better now huh?" He hummed softly against her, "can I get back to work now ya great lug? I can feel something hard and pointy jabbing into me and I hope its that crystal." He howled an abrupt startled laugh at her joke moving instead to scoop her up into his arms ignoring her protesting.

"Oh no I think I'm going to steal you away for myself for a bit actually," He turned his head towards the general direction of the kitchen, "I'm stealing May for a bit, deal with it!" before turning to carry her out the restaurant leaving the owner quite confused.

"You put me down, this is kidnapping!" She couldn't hide the excited giggling in her tone as he carried her away.

"I just figured we should get some privacy if I'm gonna jab you with something hard and pointy." She squeal laughed into her hands as he carried her away kicking her feet in too much energy as his tail wagged behind him chuckling at her joy.

#My writing #May the mewtwo #@seasidemew oc #@seasidemew syn #cw mature humor #Tw mention of blood #The Perfect thing is in reference to my A little different fic but basically May there doesn't get the darkness megastone #So ends up a big big powerful girl because I've kinda started hc the synergy corruption in that megastone sapped Mays energy #Which stunted her so Perfect refers to her being 'perfect' because she's big and has powers but like also wow all trauma #Multiverse Syn really sees a tall powerful version of May and goes “THAT'S HOT” only to learn the version of him in that world absolutely #Beats the shit outta her in the battle ring because due to trauma May doesn't wanna fight back or hurt him and goes NOOOOOO #So goes to cuddle his tiny May because ough no stay tiny and perfect like this I don't wanna think about the sad :c #Multiverse Syn definitely has more empathy and cares more because hmm sometimes my wife yes lmao #Also you heard it here first folks bloody pretty boys are Mays type™️ XD probably why she helps him when he's injured #Not immune to a pretty boy bleeding out XD and yes she calls him a pretty boy he probably loves it like yes I AM pretty #I've not actually talked about poached before it's an au in my head so dw no ones missed anything #Her getting big is a reference to the tyranitar in the 4ever movie!! I'm allowed to bullshit cause that fucker gets big so may get big too!

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