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evie-sturns · 1 day

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you want to? - matt sturniolo

summary: when you ask your classmate matt for a ride home after school, you find out hes a virgin, how could you not offer to change that?

contains: smut, semi-sub!matt, virgin!matt, swearing.

--------------------└── •✧• ──┘------------——-

the deafening bell rings throughout my math classroom, signalling the end of the day. i look down at my phone which reads 3:00pm, i instantly start to pack up my books more than ready to leave.

i watch the brunette boy to my left swing his bag over his shoulders, he doesn't say much but i'm pretty sure his names matt, i'm quite close with his brother nick but i've never got to know him personally.

i follow close behind him as he walks through the hallway.

we exit through the doors of the school, i decide to make my move now, needing a desperate ride home.

"uh- matt!" i call out walking up beside him, he looks over at me fixing the frame of his dark brown glasses.

"yeah?" he replies softly,

it shouldn't be wrong of me to ask for a ride, i've seen him briefly while i've been round at nicks house, and we got paired up for a group project in 9th grade where i spoke to him for a week.

"this is like- really random but do you mind giving me a ride home, i think my house is just down the street to yours and my car broke down this morning." i ramble

"oh- yeah, okay- thats fine." he says nervously "thank you so much" i let out a sigh of relief.

matt and i walk in silence to his car, his lips are red from where hes been biting them.

he opens the door for me, i jump in the passenger seat. the whole car is clean except for a camera battery and an empty mcdonald's cup.

he jumps in as well, "sorry if this is an inconvenience, i'll venmo you gas money and extra." i say.

"no- don't worry about it, it's fine." matt instantly replies.

i decide to start up a conversation, not wanting to sit in silence for the whole 20 minute ride.

"hows nick?" i ask, "hes okay, i think hes just weirded out about the whole audrey situation."

audrey is nick's best friend, who recently became hated at our school for sleeping with a whole friend group then lying to everyone and saying they made her do it.

"oh yeah!? she fucked that whole group of guys oh god." i exclaim, causing matt to tense up, his hands gripping the steering wheel tight.

"you okay? sorry- do you know audrey"

he shakes his head "i don't know her."

"oh you just went tense about the audrey fucking." i repeat, he laughs slightly, the tips of his ears go red.

"have you never had sex?" i ask, my head spinning round to look at him.

his cheeks go a deep red, he takes a hand off the wheel to rubs his eye under his glasses.

"i- yeah- no.. i dont know" he mutters, "you don't know if you've had sex?" i smile,

"i don't know- no" he says awkwardly with a grin.

"oh, thats fine!" i reply,

"you want to?" i continue, matt goes silent. i instantly regret my words, i didn't mean to make matt uncomfortable but it was just a genuine question.

"sorry." i instantly follow my words up, my tone less.. loud.

"yeah, i think i do" matt almost whispers as though he can't get any louder.

i nod my head understandingly , "you got anyone you want to loose it to, or not really?"

matt seems to grow a little more comfortable, his deathly grip on the wheel loosening

"i can't say" he laughs slightly "i mean i'm almost 18 and both my brothers won't stop yapping about their hook ups." he sighs

"do you want to.. with me?" i ask quietly, the words leaving my mouth before i can process

"but only if you want-" i instantly say after.

his head snaps round to look at me, his glasses slipping down the bridge of his nose slightly. "you- what" he smiles slightly, his eyebrows twisting as his cheeks flush

i stay silent, maintaining eye contact for a couple seconds.

"yeah, okay thank you" his says breathlessly, looking back to the road

"you can uh- come back to my house, nick and chris are at hockey and my parents are away for 2 weeks." matt says, trying to sound confident.

i nod, "yeah okay!"

3:42pm

matt pulls into his driveway, we've been having small talk for the past 5 minutes the rest of the way.

i open the door to his car, stepping out onto the concrete. i follow matt inside his house, i'm more than used to being in his house, execpt its usually with nick to hang out, not with his triplet brother to hook up.

i take his hand, he guides us upstairs into his bedroom. i lock the wooden door behind us.

"so uh, where do we start?" matt laughs nervously, reaching a hand up and scratching the side of his head.

i get on my tip-toes, grabbing his jaw and pulling him into a kiss. he hesitates for a second before kissing me back.

it quickly turns into a makeout, i push him back onto the bed before straddling him.

i grind against the fabric of his jeans, matt lets out a pathetic whimper against my lips clearly sensitive.

i pull away for a second to pull my shirt up over my head, revealing the pink lace of my bra. matt shamelessly stares at my tits, his top teeth sinking into his bottom lip.

after a solid 25 seconds of staring he pulls his navy blue crewneck off over his head, his middle part flopping on his forehead.

his breathing picks up as i unclasp my bra, letting it fall down onto his chest. i instantly feel a bulge feel underneath me, his face growing red.

i fix his glasses on his face lingering my fingers on his skin for longer than needed, "oh my god" i hear him whisper under his breath, i shift off his lap onto the floor, matt sits on the edge of the bed.

i fidget with the buckle of his belt, pulling it through the loops of his jeans before unbuttoning the button of his jeans and shimmying the fabric down his thighs.

i don't waste time to yank down his boxers, his erection springs out. matt's tip is slightly more red than his lips, now begging to be touched.

"you ready sweetheart?" i ask him, dragging my nails up and down his thighs.

"yeah- yes please." he nods, i wrap my hand around his length and pumping slowly, i look up at him and his head falls back "fuck.." he groans as i wrap my lips around his tip.

i circle my tongue just around his tip teasingly but it seems to be enough for matt already.

i slowly take more of him in my mouth, taking most of his dick down my throat.

"oh my god oh my god-" matt whimpers as i bob my head up and down,

my pace quickens everytime matt makes noise, only driving me to take more of him. i feel him twitch, meaning he's close already.

after matt bucks his hips up i pull off of him, edging him. "please" matt starts but i cut him off "don't want you to cum yet, don't wanna overstimulate you okay?"

he nods, i get up off the floor to straddle the top of his thighs again, his dick resting against my lower stomach.

"tell me what you want matt." i say, fixing his hair which rests against the glass of his glasses. "please?" matt whispers.

"please what." i tease, kneeling on either side of his legs and pulling down my shorts and panties in one tug. "ride me.." he says shyly. i smile before hovering myself above his tip, slowly sinking down onto his tip.

"oh my god" he groans, i let out a soft groan as i sink further down his length, i grab his wrists and place his ringed hands on my waist instead of him balling up the sheet.

"feels so good" he mumbles shakily, i start to bounce slowly up and down on his dick.

i let out strings of moans as his grip tightens on my waist "please please-" he whines, i start to pick up my pace.

"matt- you wanna try being on top?" i ask quickly, he hesitates before nodding his head eagerly.

he flips us over impressively easily, "grab my ankles" i tell him which he does, his two large hands grabbing my ankles and pushing them down by my ears, i nod.

he starts to thrust into me, matt's middle part flops on his head, his glasses shifting.

"fuck- 'm so close" he groans "you got it matt" i breathe out

matt pulls out, instantly releasing on my stomach as his glasses fall off, landing on my chest.

he flops down next to me on the bed panting, his arms laying across his forehead.

i scoot closer to matt's side, "you okay?" i ask, he wraps an arm around my waist and pulls me closer to him, a small smile forming on his face.

"you don't understand how long i've wanted that with you." he laughs slightly, "with me?" i reply, my eyes widening slightly

"yeah- i don't know." he sits up, rubbing his eyes. i sit up next to him, grabbing his glasses off my chest and holding them up

i slide the glasses onto his face, his cheeks still flushed

"we should do this again sometime" he suggests awkwardly,

"good idea matt" i smile, pressing a quick kiss to his red lips.

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@luanetaluenta @sturnsssbow @mattfangirl @luvr4miya @luvtay111 @lolasturniolo @freshloveforthefit @ruedowney @lovingchrissposts @333michelle @h3arts4harry @sonicmacks @jamiesturniolo @chrisstopherfilmed @itzdarling @sturniolo-simp4life @daddyslilchickenfingers2 @recklessmatt @ev3rgreenxtrees @lovergirl4387 @certifiednatelover @solarsturniolo @mattsenthusiast @yomamaslays4lyfe @peachmels @alinaa131 @pepsiluvr0209

#sturniolo triplets #nick sturniolo #sturniolo smut #sturniolo #matt sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #chris sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo fluff #matthew sturniolo #matt sturniolo imagine

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pinkandlilacroses · 20 hours

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⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

Angel - Paige bueckers

part 1

• summary {when an unsuspecting girl falls for the basketball star}

•warnings {none (for now)}

•comment if you would like to be added to the taglist

bellas pov

“Im just saying, a rom com romance would be fantastic tight now” I state to my best friend, Avery. “i mean everyday is the same thing over and over” i continue. I can tell she doesn’t care, Avery’s been in a relationship with her high school sweetheart, Jake since freshman year.

“you need to stop being desperate” she says scooting closer to me on our couch.

this may sound rude, but thats just how Avery is, ane i guess ive gotten used to it

“nobody understands me” i say dramatically as i get up and walk towards my room.

“remember, we are going out tonight” Avery yells

fuck. i forgot.

i hate going out, theres to many people

i feel like sometimes Avery relyes on me, i mean sometimes i wanna hang out with other people, not just her. Avery on the other hand, im her only friend and i understand why, i love her but she is so mean to any and everyone that she comes across.

a few hours pass and i begin getting ready. i put on a matching pink set with a tube top and a mini skirt, i feel cute, i cant wait for this to get ruined by a bunch of drunk, sweaty college students.

i know i take a while to get ready, i mean its taken me two hours to pick my outfit and do my hair and i haven’t even started my makeup yet. my excuse is that you can never rush perfection.

“bella cmon we gotta go” Avery yells, ‘how is she ready so early’ i think to myself, finishing my coat of mascara.

“ok, ok, im ready” i say 20 minutes later. i can tell shes pissed, but it doesn’t bother me.

“your so dramatic, its a 5 minute walk” Avery says, annoyed, as always.

“i am not made for walking”

its only been 5 minutes since our arrival and i want to leave

“hey baby” a clearly drunk guy says, while he slyly brings his hand to my bare waist.

“who are you” i say, bluntly

“hey loosen up princess” he says, getting closer

i do like that nickname. but i hate him.

“im gonna go now”

i dont know if im straight, to be honest. i was raised in a household where anything but straight was a sin, so i never really questioned my interests. but whenever i see a girl who is tall and strong, my straightness goes out the window, and i feel like im sinning. ive never done anything with a girl before and im scared, i dont know if i ever would.

i walk away from the drunk man and towards the bar

“oh my god im so sorry” ‘fuck. why am i so clumsy’, i say to the girl i bumped into

“nah your all good” she says, looking down at me

i hadn’t looked at her, but now that i am. i never wanna stop. shes tall and blonde.

“hi, im paige” she says, breaking my admiration.

“im bella” i say, shamelessly checking her out

she has on grey sweatpants and a black tshirt. hot.

“do you go here” she says, continuing the conversation.

“uh, yeah, im a junior” i say, stuttering. why am i stuttering

“are you nervous?” she says, bringing her face closer to my own. yes, i am so nervous, you make me so nervous, ohmygodohmygodohmygod

“no” i say, unconvincingly.

“you sure?” she questions again. im not ok

“your on the basketball team, right?” i say, attempting to shift the conversation

she chuckles

“yeah” she states, moving back to her original position, further away from me. come back

“have you heard of me” she says, cockily

“i think everyone has here” i say, to be honest, i dont know anything about basketball. but ive heard of her before and her eyes have me trapped, there so blue and inviting.

what am i saying

“i wanna know more about you though” she whispers, moving closer than before.

“what do you wanna know” i say wrapping my arms around her neck. i dont know where all this confidence has came from

“yo paige” some girl says, she turns around and breaks the position we were in.

“iceee” she says, dapping up her teammate

im offended.

i make my way from her and towards my friend group. i want to go home

“was that you flirting with paige bueckers”

“we were just talking, shes not interested”

“girl, paige would be interested in a tree if it had a pussy, she is definitely interested” chanel says

everyone laughs. but me

im confused, why am i attracted to her, i like men, not women.

“bella cmon, lets get you home” Avery says, i mentally thank her from saving me from this conversation.

i tuck myself into bed after taking my outfit and makeup off and get ready for my favourite activity. sleep, until.

xxx-xxx-xxx

- hey is this bella?

what the fuck. do i have a stalker

bella

- yes

xxx-xxx-xxx

- hahah thank god

- this is paige

what the fuck

A/N - first fic, how do we feeeelllllllll

#paige bueckers x reader #paige bueckers headcannons #paige bueckers smut #paige bueckers fic #paige bueckers #uconn huskies #uconn women’s basketball #uconn wbb

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042502 · 1 day

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Little Kiss // M. Sturniolo x Reader.

SYNOPSIS: Trouble in paradise, don't worry, your lover Matt will give you a good time so you can forget your husband.

WARNINGS: Infidelity, married reader, manipulative Matt, obscene language, juicy sex, lovers, among others

NOTES: My first language is not English, so if you find any grammatical errors you already know why :)

MASTERLIST!!

"Bye Emmett."

and hung up. She covered her face with her hands, embarrassed by the fact that Matt saw her crying and just cried silently. When suddenly he felt Matt's hands on his face, removing his own. You didn't make any effort and when he looked ahead, you meet Matt's eyes that were looking at her with concern.

"Dont cry please. He doesn't deserve your tears" he mentions, as he ran his thumb over his cheeks, wiping away the tears.

"Take me Home. Please" she asked.

Matt opened his mouth to say something, but quickly closed it again. He shook his head and nodded.

"Okay. Let's go."

It had been two days since you last spoke to Emmett. And although with each passing day she felt even more hurt by the fact that he had been unfaithful to her, He couldn't deny that he was partly grateful that he was away from her. This way I could spend more time with Matt and enjoy his company.

Matt was smiling as he watched you cook. Yes, she could definitely be the perfect wife. Today he was with her. Since you invited him to lunch at your house, he didn't think twice and went.

"May I help you?" Matt asked, intending to help.

"Yes. You can set the table, I'll finish preparing lunch here."

Matt nodded and disappeared into the main dining room. Some time later, they were both having lunch together and enjoying a pleasant conversation.

When your cell phone started ringing and you stood up to answer it somewhere else, Matt took the moment to get up and walk around the house. He entered a room which he deduced was where you slept. She frowned when she saw a double bed. An image of you with a man who would be Emmett making love came to mind. Without meaning to, Matt growled loudly. His jaw was tense. He shook his head and an image of you sleeping in bed, alone and suffering from your husband's deception flashed through his mind. He clenched his fists. How she wanted to take Emmett's place, to let him know she wasn't alone, and to be able to make love to him again and again...

A ray of light came straight into his eyes when he tried to take a step, and only then did he realize that in the same room there was another door that gave access to some other room. The door was ajar and when he entered, his jaw dropped. It was your painting studio. There were paintings everywhere, some hanging, while others on the tables. Brushes and paints were on the floor. Everything was messy, but the paintings gave joy to the place.

Suddenly, he heard the door close. Matt turned around and saw you leaning against the door.

"I finally find you" walking towards him. "What are you doing?"

"I was just looking at your paintings" as he turned his gaze towards the paintings. "They are great."

"Thank you. The only thing I hope is that they are good enough to win the contest." smiled.

"They are. Believe me, I have faith that you will win.

Matt looked at her and took the moment to study her profile. His lips were parted and he had an immense desire to eat her with kisses. Biting his lip, Matt tried to control the urge to kiss you again, but he just couldn't and against his will, he found himself reaching out towards you, framing tentatively. You watch him and realizing his intention, you instinctively step back.

"No" you responded. "I'm married."

He growled.

"I swear if I hear you say that one more time I will fuck you without mercy and I won't care what you say."

Your face turned pale. A cloud of lust passed through Matt's eyes.

"You would not dare" you stutter.

"Of course" smiled wickedly. "But now, I want you to do me a favor."

"Which?"

"I would like you to make a portrait of me"

You bite your lip, and unconsciously, your eyes roam over Matt's body from head to toe.

"Do you want me to draw you?" you ask, staring at his shirt that hid killer abs underneath.

"Yes. I think you could make a good portrait of me" He smiled and for a moment you felt seduced by his smile.

"Mmh... Ok. I will try to draw you."

You walked over to the windows and pulled the curtains aside to let the light flood into the room. Then he moved an armchair, somewhat worn, and placed it in the middle of the room.

"Sit here" You point your finger at him.

Matt obeyed and sat where you indicated. While I tied your hair in a ponytail, you walk and take out your easel that was leaning in the corner to position it in front of Matt, far enough from him to see him clearly. You take out all your paints and a new canvas to set out to paint. Once ready, you look up and meet Matt's eyes looking at you carefully.

"Place your elbow on the edge of the chair and lean firmly on the backrest."

Matt obeyed.. You frown.

"Adjust your hair well to one side."

"Thus?" asked, running a hand through his hair and ruffling it.

"No" You shook your head. Then you walk until you are in front of him and bend down a little to sink your fingers into his hair and comb it. Closing the eyes, Matt hissed in pleasure and enjoyed the sensation of being caressed by your soft hands. She wondered where else on his body she could touch him, but quickly pushed that thought out of her mind. You remove your hands from his hair and for a split second Matt had the impulse to ask you not to stop touching him. "Just like that" you whisper "Do not move."

You move away to resume your previous posture. Matt’s eyes followed you. Raising one hand, slide the brush over the canvas and start painting. Matt reached out and rested his hand on her chin, rhythmically stroking her bottom lip with his index finger. You frown at him.

"Don't do that. It distracts me."

Matt's lips trembled and you knew he was fighting the urge to smile, but he finally caught himself and lowered his hand from his lips.

Some time later, you were almost finished. It was dusk, and the light was coming straight at Matt from the window, illuminating his handsome face.

"I'm almost done" she spoke, looking up to see him. "Aren't you bored?"

"Baby, I could stay here all day watching you."

You blush, and then return your eyes to the canvas to finish the painting. Ten minutes later, you sigh contentedly and set the brush aside, stepping back a little and admiring your painting approvingly.

"I've finished now" still with his eyes fixed on the painting. Matt got up from the couch and walked over.

"It turned out great on you" He reached out towards the painting, intending to touch it, but quickly pulled it back when you knocked. "Ow! What?"

"Do not touch her. The paint is still fresh" You glare at him.

He snorted. You are laughing.

"I'm sorry, I just don't want it to get ruined." you smile. A smile so damn perfect it made even Matt cringe.

Matt locked his eyes on your lips, for like the umpteenth time that day. They tempted him.

"All I want is to kiss you" admitted. "Is it too much to ask?"

"For a married woman it is."

"But he cheated on you."

"I know. But please don't repeat it to me again." you ask and suddenly your voice broke. "It hurts me to hear it."

"I'm sorry" He apologized. "It's just that I'm jealous. You don't know how much I envy your husband having these lips just for him." He reached out his hand and caressed your lip with his thumb. You smacked your lips and Matt moaned. "Baby, wouldn't you be able to share, even for a second, these lips with me?"

You look it. You wanted to kiss him too. Very much.

"Alright. But just a small kiss" You agree, suddenly blushing.

"A little kiss" he repeated. "That was enough for me."

And before you could speak again, Matt leaned in and kissed you. You close your eyes and receive the kiss by wrapping your arms around his neck. Matt grunted as your tongue caressed his, and unconsciously, he found himself clinging closer to him and kissing her desperately.

Matt's lips never left yours as he began to walk, forcing you to back away and fall into the chair where he was sitting seconds ago. You straddle him and break the kiss, moaning as Matt's hands slide to your ass and squeeze it, bringing you closer to his hard erection. And damn, how much it turned him on to have you on top of him, with your sexes rubbing against each other.

"Oh, shit" Matt growled.. "If you make me that hard with a simple kiss, I don't want to imagine what it will be like when I fuck you."

And he kissed you again. Your hands moved down to his chest and you heard Matt moan as you caressed him, cinching each of his muscles. He was very strong, and as you kissed him, you wondered how hard he could move if you had him inside you.

Matt's hands slowly moved up from your hips to your waist, framing each of your curves. He felt you shudder as he went up and he liked that.

"Do you like me touching you, sweet honey?" he asked with a rough voice.

You moan in response as his hands rested on your breasts, each hand on each breast. He caressed them over the fabric of your shirt and your nipples reacted instantly, hardening. You throw your head back, enjoying his touch and suddenly doubt arose within you. Were you doing the right thing by subjecting yourself to this? Would you be capable of being unfaithful to your husband?

Only then when Matt's hand slipped under your shirt were you able to react and you placed both hands on Matt's shoulders, pushing him away from you.

"Fuck, Matt, It was supposed to be just a little kiss..."

"It's not my fault you make me like this. Come on, I know you want it just like I do."

"I can not do it, im sorry." He tried to lift me up, but Matt stopped me by firmly grabbing my hips.

"Why not?"

"I am married."

Suddenly, a fury flashed through Matt's eyes that you had never seen before and it scared you. You stand up, but quickly find yourself trapped by Matt's arms that kept you cornered between the wall of the room and his body. Swallowing, you look up, meeting Matt's eyes staring at you with an anger that froze you.

"I'm sick of hearing that damn excuse" he complains through clenched teeth "Understand, your husband does not love you. If he really loved you he should never have been unfaithful to you."

Bile rose in your throat as you heard his cold words. You swallow, in a failed attempt to untie the knot that had formed in you.

"That is not true." you murmured "He loves me."

"No!" He slammed his fist into the wall, right on the side of your head. You startle. "Answer to me, Has he called you again?"

You shake your head, unable to articulate any words.

"You see it, If he really cared about you, he should already be here with you, and not on his fucking business trip. He does not love you."

Your eyes watered. You purse your lips, trying not to burst into tears, but before you could think clearly, you found yourself throwing yourself into Matt's arms and crying into his shoulder. Matt rubbed your back, and placed a soft kiss on the top of your head, still not letting go.

"You're right, Matt" you cry. "I'm a stupid. It's the truth, he doesn't love me. Oh, Why did this happen to me? Am I that bad of a wife?"

"Don't say that, you... you are perfect. You are not to blame for anything, it is your husband who is the idiot. you're just in love..."

You pull away from him a little, enough to look him in the eyes. Your eyes were filled with tears and Matt's heart sank.

"Please make me forget it. Help me forget it."

And that was just what Matt wanted to hear. A smile formed on his lips.

"Baby, I'll make you forget it and much more than that." He grabbed your chin and brought his lips closer. "I'll make you enjoy it as much as I do."

And he kissed you again with the same desperation as always.

You sigh as Matt set you down on the bed and started kissing his neck. Raising his hands to your neck, he buries his fingers in your hair and clenches his hands into fists, caressing him in a way that makes him moan with pleasure. Matt moved away a little and kissed you with a demand that left you breathless, while Matt's hands went down and unbuttoned the buttons of your shirt in an agile movement, one by one. He licked his lips as his eyes focused on a pretty white bra, which hugged and hid large breasts. Unable to take it anymore, Matt slid his hands behind your back to unhook her bra and capture one of her breasts with his mouth. You close your eyes, moaning and throwing your head back.

"You are so beautiful, sweet honey." his hot breath hitting her hardened nipple. "You drive Me crazy."

He said it in such an intimate way that it made her moan with pleasure, asking for more. You lower your hands to Matt's hips and grab the hem of his shirt, pulling it up and off of him to reveal his torso. You rest your hands on it, each hand on each shoulder and you go down slowly, caressing. Matt's muscles tensed.

"Jesus ." he moaned. "I would like to know what other things your hands are used for besides painting..."

You smile at him and bite your lip, then undo his belt buckle and unzip his pants. You gasp when you see his huge erection, covered by the thin fabric of his boxers. Tentatively, you reach out to touch him and the moment your fingers brushed against his erection, he groaned.

"Baby, I really wish you could do that again, but this time without anything in the way."

You laugh and Matt sighs as you yank his boxers down, freeing his member. You gasp again. How could you describe it? His erection was imposing, demonstrating masculinity and authority in any direction he pointed. With your index finger, you touch the tip of his penis and hear him grunt. Then you take it with a closed fist and begin to, very slowly, slide it up and down, along its entire length. Matt parted his lips, moaning.

Matt looked down and watched as your small hands masturbated him. You increase speed. He growled loudly and with eyes dark with lust, he watched as you smiled and leaned over. Matt pulled away instantly, gasping.

"No. If you suck me, I'll end up cumming and I don't want to do it without you." I confess to you with a hoarse voice.

And he kissed you again. Closing your eyes, you wrapped your arms around his neck to deepen the kiss and pulled you closer to him. It was a demanding and wild kiss, showing him how much he wanted you.

Suddenly, a noise. Someone was calling the house phone. Matt growled against your lips.

"ignore it." Matt ordered.

You nod and kiss him again, while the phone didn't stop ringing. Oh, What did that man have that every time you kissed him, he made you forget everything.

The phone stopped ringing, but it didn't take long for the answering machine to answer.... and Emmett's voice will be heard.

"Dear. I can't wait to see you again, I have so many things to tell you" sigh. "Anyway, I just wanted to remind you that I'll be back home next week. Don't forget that I love you despite everything... goodbye."

Matt stepped away from you and stood up abruptly. She looked. His teeth were so clenched that you were even afraid he would hurt himself.

"Do not believe him" his voice comes soft from his lips. "Please don't believe him."

"I already told you that I don't care about Emmett. He is the one I want and need right now."

Matt looked at you, his eyes shining with something that looked like joy.

"Really?"

"Yes. Now come here and show me when you want me."

He kissed you once again, testing with his own tongue the characteristic flavor of your mouth that every time he tried it, he felt that it drove him more and more crazy. Pulling away from you a little, Matt placed his hands on your hips and pulled your jeans down, out of his sight. I look at you. She looked beautiful with only the thong on.

"You have a beautiful legs." He flattered you, sliding his hand up your thigh, up and down, and so on.

Shivers ran through you as you closed your eyes and let yourself be carried away by the sensation of being caressed by Matt's warm hands. Only then do you open them when you feel Matt start to pull down your panties. You look down, meeting Matt's lustful eyes.

"I love you so much" he whispered eagerly. "I'll fuck you until you can't stand up."

Matt caressed your thighs once more. He placed his hands on your hips.

"Open your legs..."

You obey instantly. Matt positioned himself in the middle of them, his erection rubbing against the entrance to your vagina. Your mouth opened in a perfect 'o' when Matt thrust in suddenly, and instinctively, you arched your hips. He parted his lips, remaining still inside you.

"You have a delicious pussy." Matt growled. "Someday I'll try it with my own mouth."

You moan and very slowly, Matt began to move. He groaned as your tight pussy enveloped him, hugging him around him.

"Shit" Matt moaned. "I'm crazy about you."

Matt looked down and watched the exciting scene of his member disappearing into your pussy as he pushed deeper into you. An expression of pleasure appeared on your face and you ran a hand over your forehead, in an attempt to remove the excess sweat. He leaned down and kissed you, then buried his nose in your hair and inhaled.

"You smell so good." Matt sighed, letting the scent take over. "Roses and jasmine."

Grabbing your thighs, Matt sank completely into you. You scream, not caring how it sounded and dig your nails into Matt's arms. Narrowing his eyes, he hissed in pleasure.

"Faster" you ask. "Please, I need it."

Matt growled and increased the speed of his attacks. His hips moved from front to back, in the same rhythm that made you go crazy. The bed creaked and hit violently against the wall of the room. And Matt couldn't help but roar out loud, when he felt you tighten your grip around him.

"That's it baby" He moaned, feeling how your wet flesh began to hug his penis tightly. "cum for me..."

You came instantly, saying Matt's name in a scream that echoed in his ears. Closing his eyes, Matt threw his head back and growled once more.

Matt collapsed on top of you, his nose buried in your hair and breathing heavily into your ear. He moved and lay down next to you. She turned her head and looked at you, caressing your cheek with a strange tenderness that touched you.

"Your husband is a lucky man. I envy him." admitted.

"Please, I don't want to talk about him right now. I just want to think about you right now."

You snuggled into his side, resting your head on his bicep and closed your eyes. Matt put his arms around your waist and placed a soft He kissed your forehead, and then brought you even closer to him and fell into a very deep sleep.

NOTES: Remember to hit the heart and share it with your friends! Thanks for reading^^ If you want to be part of the taglist leave a comment!

TAGLIST: @luverboychris @alexandernvr @prisciliin @sturncakez @imwetforyourmom @hotreaderliin @tillies33ssss @sturnioloxlver

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devilevlls · 14 hours

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hii can i request 1/jealousy with any of the brothers of your choice and i dont mind if its nsfw or sfw <3

thank you and have a great day/night <3

Hii! I can't remember where I read that Lucifer sometimes compares himself with Barbatos, but it just hit me like lightning and I started writing.

Hope you enjoy the quick drabble with the prompt! 💙

Jealousy ༘⋆

Gender-Neutral MC༘ ⋆｡˚

MC found themselves spending an increasing amount of time with Barbatos, their affection toward each other evident in the shared smiles and lingering conversations. The human's presence in the demon castle seemed to outweigh their time spent at the House of Lamentation, much to Lucifer's growing anger.

Staying there observing them walking together, Barbatos exuding his customary gentlemanly charm while MC radiated their infectious sunshine personality, only fueled Lucifer's frustration. He grappled with conflicting emotions; as the embodiment of Pride, how could he possibly admit to feeling jealous of a mere mortal?

But today, he resolved to confront the situation. Intercepting MC in RAD’s corridor, he quickly joined them, shooting a meaningful look before bringing up the topic.

"You and Barbatos seem rather close lately," he remarked, his tone tinged with an edge.

"Yes," came MC's simple reply.

"Is that all you have to say?" Lucifer arched an eyebrow, halting their progress.

"We're working on something," MC shrugged, evading his scrutiny with averted eyes, silently pleading for a change of topic.

"And what, pray tell, might that be?" Lucifer pressed, his patience wearing thin.

"Something," MC deflected, determined to keep their secret under wraps.

"Are you two perhaps involved romantically?" Lucifer's attempt at nonchalance betrayed by the telltale twitch of his eyebrows, taking a long pause before MC finally responded.

"Well, that certainly took an unexpected turn," they chuckled, eyes widening in amusement. "Are you jealous?"

"I most certainly am not," Lucifer retorted, his irritation palpable. "Just answer the question and stop playing with me."

"Hmm... I'll leave that for you to discover," MC teased, shooting him a mischievous wink before sauntering off.

Little did Lucifer know, Barbatos was assisting MC in crafting a grand birthday cake for the pride avatar, their secret project intended as a surprise for his upcoming birthday celebration. With each passing day, Lucifer's impatience would only serve to heighten the anticipation of the impending reveal.

Drabble prompts you can use in your requests!

#obey me #obey me shall we date #omswd #obey me one master to rule them all #evllsposts #obey me writing #obey me drabble #obey me scenarios #obey me lucifer #obey me lucifer x reader #obey me swd #evllsasks #obey me barbatos #Luci's birthday is getting closer 😋

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10underoot2 · 2 days

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I cannot stress enough how strongly episode 14 starts. I loved so much of it.

- Haein's beautiful monologue at the start. I love how it contrasts the Church conversation because he does remember and he's willing to still stay true to his promise of being by her side.

"We put emphasis on our happy moments but we dont know what the future hold for us. So we make promises we can't keep and laugh as if these happy moments will last forever. However, there is a dark side behind those radiant moments. When the magical moments dissapeared and hardships made me want to give up, a thought crossed mind. 'Sure, I've experienced many misfortunes, but I still have you.' And that helped me endure."

- The beautiful, beautiful way she tells Hyunwoo why she cannot get surgery if it means losing her memory. Notice how she draws him in a game of remember when. It's their memories that they're talking about and reminiscing. If she got the surgery the strength, the field, him, the memories they all cease. I can't imagine the pain of her knowing that all these memories and experiences would then be only his.

Honeymoon. Field. Trivial info - there was a pub. We drank and argued - intimate detail. Smile - ah I remember you saying that. Passed the field again - a beautiful moon.

"I still remember the smell, the moon and the wind of that day. That's what memories are. Being alive means I cherish those memories and drive strength from them. So those memories define me and my life. And I'll be losing them. This place will just become an ordinary field for me. And you will become a stranger. I'll no longer be myself. That's why I'm not getting the surgery. I've lived as myself and I'll die as such."

#queen of tears #baek hyun woo #hong hae in #kim soo hyun #kim ji won #and the episode has so much more #Hae-in seeing how much she means to her family.#The post Church Conversation.#Seeing Hyunwoo devastated when he thought her dead.#Hyunwoo crying after seeing her off to the operation #i do not appreciate the end though #sighs I'll appreciate the good regardless though

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ablazeinhim · 5 months

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feeling like such a loser lately and like is it the winter or is the introversion or is it the disability???

#for a while now its been so hard for me to discern if social stuff is hard because im ND or because im an introvert #theoretically i love parties but im horrible at them on my own #i dont know what to say or how to start conversations #i desperately want to mingle and talk to people and have a god time but idk how to start that interaction #esp because i dont love talking about my work/home life (bc it makes me feel like a loser!) so i dont want to ask people about their work #in case they reciprocate and ask me about mine #also the masking #the masking is exhausting #!#the ND masking not covid masking!!#im afraid ill have nothing to add to a conversation #im afraid when i do speak up that ill ramble about something no one cares about or talk fkr too long or being jn skmething that feels like #non sequitur and ill watch peoples eyes glaze over as they scan the room for others to talk with #i have no social anxiety about like asking for help or directions or “hey where did you get that pizza it smells so good”#or “omg i love your outfit!!!”#but in a room full of people who sort of know each ither #or like p much any space where there are clumps of people talking and im not in any of them?#i feel like a bother and incompetent #i crawled out from under my rock for my only social engagement this month and theyre on their 3rd of the day and loving it #hoping eventually i wont feel the need tk mask so much. i know that makes things so much harder #=

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nuppu-nuppu · 11 months

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Ignore if you don’t want to read about me being stupid once again

#pls dont read if you cant handle venting and whining #once again i am here to say that i am the loneliest person alive and i feel like i can’t grasp the basic consept of friendship and do it lol #like idk how to be friends #i feel like i will forever be sad and lonely #and i know everyone will say you can talk to me and i know that but i’ve just been by myself for so long that i don’t remember how to have #actual conversations with people i feel like i am disconnected from reality #i feel like i am an extremely unlikeable person and that’s why i was all alone in highschool and idk i am oversharing on the internet again #because it’s the only place i kind of feel safe doing it #pls take care of yourselves first before comfoting me or anything im sorry i sound very pathetic #how do i start living again #how does one live anyway #im just in my head all the time #this was supposed to be hot girl summer but it’s once again summertime sadness #im so stupid!!!#im so anxious and depressed that i dont know what to do with myself #im so sorry for oversharing i have a therapist dont worry im kind of taking care of myself #but the eternal loneliness just wont let me go #idk how to be a person anymore #i’m just sad #thinking of going to a church and pretend to be a believer so i could have a community again lol

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todayisafridaynight · 23 days

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any hopes for kiwami 3? like things u wanna see added or changed stuff like that

if they dont keep kiryu's goofy walk stance and the hoof-like walk sounds i dont wanna play it

#snap chats #no one understands how much i love that from y3 and y4 its genuinely one of my favorite things about the game #oh but i guess i have to give an actual answer now. HMPH.#id scream if they revived kanda calling mine limp wristed. homophobia in 4k #OK BUT TO BE SERIOUS uhhhh i dont know. im a real simple guy i think #my only like. If This Isnt There Im Leaving deal is mine's palette and im so serious #rgg's scaring me with all the black-hair/purple-suit mine stuff as of late and i cant stress how hard ill vomit if thats in the final #HYPOTHETICAL final anyways. yk3 isnt coming out for. IDK A WHILE #i wanna say i hope they highlight daigo and mine's relationship more but i dont know how theyd do that #i really like how mine's handled in y3 as is so i dont think i want scenes injected like what they did with yk1 and nishiki #someone said a Mine Saga after the game and... hm ... sounds too unrealistic for me to hope for it #like im REALLY trying to think how they could possibly reference the rggo stories in y3 since those are EXCELLENT but #i think . MAYBE. you could reference the story where richardson calls mine as he's driving to the hospital #the only thing you'd have to exclude though is mine stopping by the bar- like JUST keep the phone conversation maybe #cause in that scene that subordinate does question mine if he can really kill daigo and i think thatd be neat. in my opinion.#yeah i dont know. in regards to rggo its hard to think of what i want without intervening things i already like about y3 #its a real head scratcher ...#a really good epilogue addition would be adapting that RGGO bit where daigo ruminates on mine. that's a fair ending for him i think #it also fulfills the need to see how daigo saw mine even if its just a little #and to non-rggo readers it could start to answer 'how does daigo feel about everything that happened'#im still so curious as to if daigo was briefed on EVERYTHING that happened but .... anyways....#sorry all my hopes for y3 are just mine/minedai centric fLVKELKA BUT LIKE. i really am content with everything else with y3 surprisingly #idk. i want kiryu fucking up that curry in high definition tho. thats important to me #THEY HAVE TO KEEP THE QTES DURING THE RICHARDSON FIGHT ILL BE PISSED #i need the fight to be AS CAMPY and unnecessary as it was in the og. INCLUDING richardson's voice acting i need it wack as hell #is it weird i actually appreciate the Diet Building Loredumping being like. in replayable-cutscene form #i thought id prefer just One Long cutscene but im glad theres the option to skip those segments #BUT being able to get a refresher in case you missed something somehow #im running out of tags jesus christ i shouldve put this in the main text but vjALjlagj those are all my thoughts for now bYE

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theoryofarson · 11 months

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our dining table first kiss up there for kisses of all time for me

#its so naturalistic #their little laughs...the mutual understanding of like. this is awkward and silly but thats ok and i am so so so in love with u #minoru says the whole thing was so unromantic and on the one hand hes right and thats what makes it wonderful #but on the other hand everything about the scene and the leadup to it was the PEAK of romance to me #like ive never seen more perfect romance tropes done more perfectly....#the pep talk leading to an epic change of heart....#the 'get your man' running sequence where each of the lovers starts running to find the other and they meet in the middle #the conversation where one thinks theyve already been rejected and that they know thats what the other is going to say #until the other says no!! listen!! you DONT know what i feel!!#and im not good at expressing my feelings but im going to try!!!#the hug first. always gotta be a hug first #and how it ended withe ringing in of the new year and the 'tastes like meat bun' and theyre still holding hands and everything....#oh it was all so perfect my romantic little heart cant handle it #our dining table

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frogayyyy · 1 year

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will my mum ever understand that i don’t like talking (as in it’s really physically difficult) sometimes, especially in the morning, and not get upset with me and make me feel guilty about it despite telling her countless times that this is why? 😃

i just vented in the tags sorry bout that :S

#i wouldn’t say non verbal but pretty close #it’s the same with everything #she just doesn’t understand at all and it’s so draining :/#she constantly makes me feel bad for trying to set boundaries so i just give up #like no i genuinely can’t do some things without help no matter how many times you explain it to me i’m sorry?#no i don’t like that food because the texture makes me want to rip my hair out #i want to try different foods i just have bad anxiety about it and you making comments about it doesn’t help #yes i do need to have headphones or earplugs in most of the time bc sometimes it’s unbearable not to #yes i want to spend time alone in my room bc a) it’s a normal thing to do and b) it’s the one place where i can just be myself n not mask #no i’m not ignoring you you actually just interrupted a conversation i was having with my friends #‘i wish you would talk to me more about things’ I WONDER WHY I DONT #and i can’t even say any of this to her because she’d just cry and tell me what a bad mother she is #like… yea exactly #don’t even get me started on queer stuff #yknow i came out two years ago as not straight #and she hasn’t said a single thing about it since #not even vaguely supportive #i can’t even remember if she told me she still loves me #she said ‘i don’t know what to say’ and left me sobbing by myself #i have to censor myself around them bc i still don’t know how they feel about it #the worst part of it is that i convince myself she isn’t that bad so i just forgive her #and never do anything about it #even now i’m thinking ‘ yea but she genuinely isn’t that badi’ 🤡#i want to leave so bad or at least not be in the same house #but i’m not financially independent yet #and i genuinely don’t know if i could cope living on my own #:’D #just gotta deal with it for now #thank god for this safe space 🙏 love u guys #about the only thing keeping me (partially) sane atm

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chillllii · 2 hours

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when the audhd is fun until you become "i really really really have to give my input/side/idea and i dont give a fuck who's talking or what everyone was initially talking about" and before this site's illiteracy kicks in i'm certain we're all guilty of this to some extent

#well i'm not fucking talking to you am i #this is not directed at every reader but i think even if you think ''i'm not that bad #chilllli yelps #not everything autism/adhd/audhd does is cool we do annoying shit sometimes and that's just a fact that yall dont wanna hear #it's also ok to make mistakes and it's ok for your brain to have flaws #but also when you interrupt people to say smth that either no one cared to hear. no one was even saying. or fuck maybe someone already said #it. it's a little fucking annoying and when you do it over and over and over and over sometimes people get sick of your shit #you have flaws you are imperfect and your ego will be your social death if you do not learn to allow others to speak #fuck #if people start screaming at me btw cause i said smth that's true i'm blocking and deleting that shit #work on yourself #i also know yall are gonna be like ''oh well *I* never interrupt people and when i do i apologize you should at least do a small self evalua #just a small ''well do i listen to my friends very well? do i listen to the conversation i am a part of?"#also to yall who go into discord calls and lurk but sometimes talk think ''when i speak is it actually relevant to some extent?#or if you REALLY wanna talk about it it's ok just try to find a way to segway into what you wanna talk about cause that's how conversations #work.#i dont really expect this post to go anywhere tbh i'm just kinda frustrated cause i know a lotta neurodivert people who do this and idk how #say that interrupting people is annoying and disrespectful cause i know the brain chemical gets excited when it has smth it wants to talk-#about #i love you and i want you to tell me things. i also want to say things and when you talk over me to tell me things it comes off as you not #giving a fuck what i or others even are saying cause you're taking over the conversation with your shit that's irrelevant and no one has-#mentioned #idk i think i'm tired of seeing people be disrespected all the time but not knowing a polite way to tell them that they need to wait their-#turn to speak and when it's appropriate to change the subject

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britneyshakespeare · 7 days

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i have been working with kids for four years and i had to write my first ever note just now about a seventh grade boy being inappropriate towards me. i don't know what the hell this could possibly lead to or what. he was trying to feel my legs repeatedly to the point where i had to stop sitting next to him (and i was subbing for his one-to-one para!!!). he's got high support needs. in that kind of job, you're supposed to sit next to them all day and look over their work.

the teacher whose classroom this was happening in could also tell something was wrong. the whole class was acting kinda crazy because it was the day before school vacation week and there was another class coming in to share projects. so like, he was swamped with keeping order already. but we were sitting two feet away from his podium at the front of the room. the kid was giving him and me a hard time when he wouldn't take out his chromebook as he was instructed. and then when he did take out his chromebook, he immediately, for some reason, places it on my lap. he had been ogling my legs the whole time. he puts his computer ON MY LAP. and i'm just like, stunned, because what the hell? can you not keep it on your own lap, for some reason? i don't even know what to say, i just hold it a little above my lap while i'm thinking why on earth would this be happening? he would NOT do this to his regular para if she were here, would he? this can't be normal.

and the teacher sees this and within a minute places a stool in front of the kid for him to put his laptop on. and i'm like. oh ok. yeah. he notices exactly what's happening and that that's not appropriate. and then when the other class comes in to share projects he tells me "miss b——, you don't actually have to sit next to c—— this whole period if you don't want to." and he grabs me a chair for me to go sit with the other paras in the back opposite corner of the room. like he KNEW. and thank you mr. d—— for recognizing that because i was just kind of shocked and didn't know if i was overreacting in my head to all of this.

when there's a point in the class where the kids are discussing stuff, i privately mention what's happened to the para who's sitting closest to me. and she says that the thing about him calling me pretty is something he's been known to do, but the fact that he kept trying to touch my legs is new behavior. and that's a completely different class of behavior. i was telling him NO, don't do that, and he kept doing it. and the fact that he was calling me pretty repeatedly, even when i was giving him instructions that he wasn't taking. and this is the second to last class before the end of the day, so she says she'll take a walk with him before learning center and talk to him about it, and i'm grateful for that. she does. the kid apologizes to me as soon as i come into learning center. but like. WHAT the hell.

i'm STILL like what the hell. this is unfathomable to me. the other adults who i told about this or who witnessed it were supportive of me. but. what to do??? i wrote a long note to his regular para about this, because i knew she was going to hear about it at least from the first para i told. the second para i told about it after school had a kind of... i'm not gonna say enabling reaction, but i suppose since it had already been "taken care of" (or at least, he had been spoken to and apologized) she didn't really have much to add in the way of discipline. i told her what happened after school and she was just like... a little bit, laughing? like oh, yup, that dog. she at the very least confirmed he KNEW what he was doing, that that was not an accident. she said to me "i had a feeling he was going to develop a crush on you" (me and these other paras were together for most of the beginning of the day too). but it's like. it's not about that.

i have worked with children for FOUR years. children have had crushes on me before; i'm quite unfazed by it. boys from the ages of 5-to-15 have told me i'm so pretty before and asked me to marry them. i've never had them feeling up my legs before. i've never had them making me physically uncomfortable. it's NOT about this seventh grader having a crush on the pretty substitute. he is NOT unusual for that, at all. but i've never had a boy of any age or education level repeatedly touching my knees and thighs. THAT is problem behavior!!!

because what if i wasn't assertive enough with him to tell him to stop? what if i was a girl his age? worse, what if i was an adult who encouraged this behavior? i don't come to the middle school to be a seductress. i had no intention in putting on a pair of tights and a skirt this morning of being viewed as an attractive object, especially not by a pubescent boy. what if i did though? what if his interpretation of me wasn't so incorrect and offensive? what if i let him keep touching me inappropriately and saying flirtatious things to me? me, an adult in my mid-twenties, towards a middle school boy?

in no world would that be ok. if i had been feeling up and overly-complimenting a CHILD at my place of work, holy shit would there be reports about me. so a child acting that way could never be ok either. if it'd be firable for me to be reciprocating that action, then that action should not be happening to me. ever. and that child should never repeat that action again to any other adult again.

like i am simply not there to be treated as an attractive young woman. i put on a skirt that shows too much knee and get paired with a boy, though, and that's apparently just a natural consequence. hooo-ly shit. like i don't know what to do. first of all, the more time passes since this has happened, the more i am just unable to stop thinking about it. i wasn't "hurt" or too emotional in the moment but i'm just still processing it and it gets worse. i'm just more and more disgusted.

i don't know what i expect to come out of this, or the email i sent to his regular para. like, am i gonna have to attend a fucking meeting? what is the precedent that this sets for him? WHY do i feel BAD for him about this? well, because he's a child, of course. a child who has done wrong he may not be able to understand. but he knows WHAT he did. he just doesn't know WHY it was wrong.

and i couldn't even say something to him that was like, "well, how would you like it if i was touching you like this?" because young boys do not understand how inappropriate it'd be. i'm sure this kid thought he was gonna get away with what he was doing at the very least. but probably not unlikely he (being a child with no concept of how wrong it'd be) thought he could get some sort of "positive" attention for treating me like this. either way he was simply doing what he wanted to do, with no perspective of how it would make me feel or that it could be classified as harassment. teenage boys think it'd be awesome if the older attractive woman would reciprocate their affections. they're wrong. i, as the older attractive woman of his affection, cannot be the one to convince him of that, though.

i don't know. i don't know. like it's just so not ok. but if i didn't tell another adult about this, he would've gotten away with it. he would probably do it again. and him being in trouble for it is not the same as him understanding that it was wrong. unless someone has a REAL talk with him about inappropriate attention and consent, it's not unlikely that he'll just repeat the behavior in a setting where he thinks he won't be caught or told on. THAT'S the problem. me, i could just never have to be this boy's para again. in my email, i didn't say that i would never be ok working with or around him ever again. he already knows i didn't like it and i'm not afraid to tell on him; as far as that lesson applies to me, individually, i think he's become too ashamed to repeat that.

i don't know. i don't know. i very much expressed that i, i guess, "forgave" him in the email that i wrote. i clarified that i was writing it for the sake of having it on the record. i think that could potentially be very important for the purposes of preventing further similar or escalating behavior from him in the future. i don't want him to be in trouble. i don't think i will be blamed for this, especially not with how promptly i acted, although i don't know to what extent this will be framed as me thinking i'm a "victim." i'm not... i don't feel victimized. i feel disgusted. i feel afraid for the sake of what could happen to or with him in the future, if he thinks behavior like his towards me today is ok.

i feel like if i end up having to further respond to this, this will be made about me. in a way it kind of was. is? in the moment it was happening, it was certainly about me. because i was the one this boy was giving all this unwanted attention to. but to make the consequences of this about me and to involve me any further, i also don't want. because i said what i said already, i don't care if a student has a crush on me. this isn't about me being the pretty substitute. i'm the pretty substitute all the time, to tons of people. that's not really something i've been concerned about up until now.

but do i have to reexplain my personal embarrassment? that i was wearing a skirt? that he was ogling my legs? really? what more do i have to gain from sharing that, other than having the adults at my place of work confirm or deny me in their heads as the pretty substitute? i don't know. perhaps that's REALLY overthinking it. but i don't want to be the substitute that caused a problem for this special ed kid. i don't wanna be the reason that he can't be around me anymore, the person people think of when they're monitoring how he's acting around girls and young women. i DON'T want to be the one people think of when they think of his past misbehavior. i'm NOT here for that.

that's just fucking humiliating. and in this being a thing that could follow him, i have to be ogled and touched over and over again in people's minds for this to be taken seriously. but for this to be swept under the rug would be even worse, no? i don't know. i hate this. the principal is a nice guy; i wouldn't be surprised if he and/or people from the special ed department reached out to me sympathetically about this. but i don't wanna be reached out to. i don't wanna have ppl i work with tell me "sorry that kid was just so attracted to you he couldn't help himself" like come on. if the kid himself doesn't change then i don't really care to remember this incident. and no one reaching out to me and saying they've talked to this kid will actually prove to me he understands. this is the kind of inappropriate behavior it takes years for people to understand why it was wrong, especially a child who has no idea. i mean come on.

#tales from diana #long post #sorry i should probably put this under a read more but it was just a long stream of consciousness #and idk. im tired. im so tired #do you wanna be known as the substitute teacher a kid kept touching inappropriately? probably not #thank god for the first para i told bc she took it really seriously seemingly. i mean idk what she told him in their conversation #not EXACTLY what she told him. she obviously said this was wrong and she reiterated in learning center again #that if that were her daughter she'd be through the roof and that she'd be telling his regular para #i mean of course i had to tell the regular para directly. i would rather it come from my mouth #i'm the one who has the most information of how and why it happened. i think other ppl telling it would just reduce it to #'he thought she was so pretty and he kept staring at and touching her legs cuz she wore a skirt' like come on #the indignity of that!#i already feel undignified enough.#and also thank god for the social studies teacher. the more im processing this the more im like thank god #i dont know him well. he had already been a nice dude to me before in my interactions w him #like as a sub you notice the people who are really affirming of the strange and irregular work you do #earlier this week i was subbing for the math teacher across the hall for instance and he came in before class started and said #that if anyone's giving me a hard time to just send them to him. bc that group can be a little rowdy/wild #my classroom discipline skills are not that bad where i felt the need to have someone more experienced defend me so to speak #like i know i look young and am assumed to be new. but with most classes. i can handle most misbehavior #i can put my foot down in a way kids normally respect. i know how to keep em on task #and for MOST of the day with this kid that's what i was doing. but if that social studies teacher hadn't done what he did #i might not feel so bold in just straight up walking away from that kid. after saying stop stop stop repeatedly #like he had his own job to do independent of me but i remember the gestures and like. i could cry. he KNEWWWW #that's just a very trustworthy person i feel. he didn't want me to suffer through that any longer #a lot of teachers (unfortunately) largely ignore the kids with paras and/or expect the paras to communicate to the kid exclusively #that teacher is not like that. he was willing to mind that boy while i escaped that situation. so so grateful to him

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