#i just have a soft spot for those villains in media who are doomed from the start yknow. (stares tearfully at morganthe and gf spider) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thepenultimateword · 2 years

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okay so:

I had a dream about this one idea where everyone makes fun of villain for whatever reason. Villain starts to believe all those things, still feels terrible of course, but finds it easier to deal with it all when they just accept those "jokes" as truth.

But well, since I'm a sucker for villain x villain stuff, Supervillain swoops in to help them out of their misery

Thanks a lot in advance and have a wonderful day ❤️♥️

*Me reading this ask*

My villain x supervillain heart can’t resist. (May just be my favorite ship, even more than hero x villain. Just something about two crime-hardened people being soft for each other)

CW: Bullying, panic attack

"Smile~," the hero said, the big black eye of their phone camera reflecting Villain's queasy face.

The colors were muted, but even so, their skin was far too pale. Their lips seized somewhere between a grimace and a glare. A scribbled line of a mouth that gated off the burn rising in the back of their throat and anything else that might let it loose, even their own words of defense.

They didn't even know who this hero was. They were just some start-up who jumped them in one of the back allies. What was worse was this wasn't the first time. Not even close. Every hero seemed to have eyes on them these days. Even some civilians got the courage to gang up together and get in on the fun.

"Come on," the hero insisted, pouting their lips like they were talking to a baby. "Just one little smile."

Villain swallowed hard on the bile, wincing at the way it scalded on the way down, and shakily rose the corners of their lips. This was fine. It was just a stupid trend. People would forget about it soon. And maybe it was funny. Villain certainly had never met anyone else with such an...interesting reaction to fear. People liked it because it was weird. It was just a joke.

Villain's eyes burned. They'd been wearing these contacts for too long. The wetness pricking in the corner of their eyes stung like salt in a wound.

Wait. Wetness? Were they crying?

No, please. Not now. Not here. Not with their hands bound to a back alley waterspout and this vigilante nobody putting them on their live stream for the whole world to laugh at.

"Aww, why are you crying, buddy? You're just fine. I mean, I've barely touched you aside from those bonds. You're not actually frightened already are you?"

Logically, Villain should be fine. They'd won against stronger heroes than this idiot. So why couldn't they move?

“N-no…” Villain choked weakly. They had meant to shout it, but as soon as their mouth was open, they felt any force on their stomach muscles would be their doom.

Their heart pounded in their ears at this point and it was hard to get enough air with their mouth clamped shut. Dark spots flecked their vision, but the alternative seemed much worse.

No, Villain wasn't frightened. They were terrified.

This hero might be a rookie, but Villain didn't know them. They didn't know what they were going to do to them. Whether this joke extended further than their humiliation. What their limits were. And it was the same story with most of their attackers these last three months. Ever since a reporter caught Villain puking on video in response to Other Hero pinning them in a corner and nearly killing them. They should be somewhat thankful for that; Other Hero's shock had given them the few seconds needed to escape. But in this moment, with so many people talking, so many people watching...it was hard not to see that as a catalyst for a nightmare.

It wasn't the only thing of course...there were also the tics: handwringing during monologues, giving up on schemes when it turned out none of the heroes they were used to were coming, etc. Half a villain the media called them. Because some part of them must be a hero for how much they foiled themself.

Yeah...maybe that was funny. Maybe Villain just needed to understand the joke better, and they would stop being so scared. Maybe if they just went along, things would get better.

"Alright, viewers," the hero said cheerily, "what do you say we spice things up a little."

They moved in closer, and Villain huddled back against the brick wall behind them.

"Now, now, don't freak out. I'm just going to ask questions, and you're going to tell us some things. Things we've all been curious about. Like why you do it."

Villain squeezed their eyes shut as if doing so could hide them from the hero's prickling smirk. They didn't want to talk about this. They didn't want to talk about this. They didn't want to--

"Get that phone out of their face before I choke you with it."

Villain wasn't sure who said it, but there was a yelp and the scrape of two pairs of shoes scuffling in the gravel, and then the pounding of one pair running away. When they opened their eyes, the hero was gone. In their place stood a face they'd only seen on television. Well-dressed, unnaturally attractive, and sharp, diamond-cutting eyes boring into their soul: Supervillain.

Villain gaped. People like Villain didn't just run into people like Supervillain. Maybe they were both criminals, but they were in completely different classes. Supervillain was untouchable. They didn't even bother hiding when they went out because not even the heroes had developed a good protocol to stop them. The media compared them to a cat swatting at flys.

And now they were right here. This...this was...

They doubled over and vomited into their own lap.

Nooo.

The shame blanketed them in a hot haze, and their upper lip went cool with a gathering sheen of sweat. Villain twisted away from Supervillain's face before they could see their disgusted expression. "I'm sorry. I--" They scrunched small and pressed their forehead against the cool brick, swallowing the sour taste trapped in the dry of their mouth several times before mustering up a few more words. "Thank you. Thank you, but... Please go."

"That must hurt." Gentle fingers touched their raw wrists where the ropes pinched and scraped. Something cold and metal laid across Villain's forearm and pressed through the small space beneath the bonds.

Villain flinched and whirled their head back around just in time to see the rope slacken and flutter to the gravel. They stared at the mess of frayed cord for several moments before forcing their gaze toward the master criminal.

Supervillain twirled the long blade back into a holster on their side. A moment later, they unclipped their cape and swept it around Villain's shoulders, fussing with the folds a moment before bundling them up in their arms.

"N-no," Villain protested gripping awkwardly to Supervillain's arm through the fabric as their feet were taken out from under them. "You shouldn't touch me. I-I'll ruin your cape."

"I get it dry cleaned twice a week," Supervillain said, voice vibrating low and even in their chest. "It'll be fine."

Their arms squeezed a little tighter around Villain's form, and with a rush of air, the dark alley shrank and dropped out of sight. It wasn't even that Villain lost sight of it as Supervillain jumped; it was like the world literally folded it out of existence, leaving them sailing through dark nothing. Villain tried to make sense of it, but they were already in a daze, and their lurching stomach wasn't making cognitive functions much easier. Most of the journey was a blur. So it was rather sudden when they found themself on their own two feet again in the middle of a bright, cream-colored living room.

Villain felt like a newborn deer blinking in their first surroundings. It was beautiful. Like something from a home decorating show. Suede sofa, plush rug, tall ceiling...

Supervillain stood to the side, steadily drinking them in, and Villain pulled the cape tighter around them, as if it could shield them from Supervillain's view and hide their obvious displacement . One worn shoe tread halfway over the cream rug and when they edged onto the hard floor, it left an ugly, gray smear.

Villain's eyes leaped up to Supervillain's in a panic, but the master criminal simply looked down and up again. They smiled.

"Why don't you take a shower? Make it as long as you want. I'll leave some clothes outside the door. We'll talk when you're done."

Villain stared.

"Bathroom is straight down this hall. Use any of the products you find; I have a lot."

Villain nodded numbly and unsure what else to do, followed Supervillain's pointing finger into the master bathroom.

It was beautiful too. The bath looked more like a hot tub and the shower was like a walk-in closet. The mirror covered nearly the entire wall and only then did Villain realize how truly pathetic they looked, especially beside the rich, deep blue of Supervillain's cape. Hair a mess, eyes sunken, dirt all over their face, lips bloodless, and just overall small.

Villain broke eye contact with themself and began stripping away the dirty clothes, carefully folding the vomit stains inwards before gingerly piling them on the toilet. The air conditioning from the overhead vent sent a shiver down their spine, but it was nothing compared to the goosebumps still prickling their skin from the incident.

They turned the faucet up to nearly the hottest setting and let all that cold fear and alley grime wash down the drain. Steam gathered comfortingly around them in humid lavender and mint as Villain busied themself with lathering their hair.

It took a long time for their uneasiness to fade, but once it had, they wrapped themself in one of the bathroom's plush towels and peeked outside the door to find a neatly folded pile of clothes: a fleece long-sleeved shirt and a pair of baggy drawstring sweats, all roughly their size.

They dressed quickly, and a little poking under the sink led them to a bottle of mouthwash that rid them of the sour bile taste lingering in their mouth.

Feeling significantly better, Villain padded out to the living room, clenched hands sunk deep into their pockets. They found Supervillain sprawled out across the sofa, a book pinched between thumb and forefinger. They looked up at the sound of Villain's footsteps.

"Ah," Supervillain swung their legs to the rug and waved Villain toward the pillow-covered arm chair across from them. "Please, sit.

Villain did so, hunching their shoulders and staring at their knees. "Um, so, thank you again for um…well…all this, but...what did you want to talk about?"

Why did you bring me here? That was the real question knocking around in Villain's head, but they didn't dare say it loud.

"I haven't introduced myself," Supervillain said, tone as if they'd truly only just realized. "Excuse me, I'm--"

"Th-that's ok," Villain interrupted peering up from under their lashes. "I know who you are."

Supervillain smiled, even looked somewhat flattered as they leaned their elbows on their knees. "Good. I'll be blunt then. I can change your image. That is, if you want."

Villain swallowed. “How?"

"The media is fickle," Supervillain said. "They drop the old for whatever's hot. It may not be exactly what you want, but if you present them with another story, one that overshadows your current image, it will be like all this other stuff never happened."

"And...what would that other story even be?" Villain asked, trying to feel out Supervillain’s angle. There was no way they were doing this out of the kindness of their heart.

Supervillain scooted onto the very edge of the sofa. They clasped their hands, unclasped them, laid them flat on their knees. "Perhaps your new relationship with me?"

Villain choked on their own breath. "My... my what?"

“Think about it! It’s the perfect solution! I’m the biggest name in villainy this city has ever seen, and that’s not my ego talking. No one would dare touch you knowing that you’re associated with me. And with a presence as strong as mine, after a few months, you’ll only be thought of as my partner. This ‘half a villain’ nonsense will fade away.”

Villain had a lot of things on their mind but the first thing that burst out was, "What if it backfires? What if I ruin your image?"

Supervillain chuckled like Villain had something silly. "Not gonna happen."

"So...we'd pretend to date?" Villain said slowly, still trying to figure out why Supervillain was doing this.

"Oh. Oh, no, no, I was thinking more of the real deal,” Supervillain said quickly. “I'm not really into confusing personal feelings with work. But hey, if you're not comfortable, I can see about giving you a job instead. It may take a slower course, but it should still do the trick."

Their smile remained pasted on, but their forehead creased and the nonchalant wave of their hand seemed stiff. They preferred the relationship idea. Not a fake one. A real one.

"Why would you want that?" Villain said.

"Um, because you're adorable?" Supervillain said without hesitation. "We have the same ideals, same job, there must be tons of other things we have in common. And you've got this defenseless vibe around you that I can't resist. I saw you in that first video, and I knew right away: that villain is going to be mine."

"I don't get it."

Villain’s voice cracked without warning. They clenched their fists, but they were already trembling. Was Supervillain in on this too? Was there a hidden camera somewhere amongst all this finery? Ready to broadcast Villain's gullibility? That had to be it. It was the only thing that made sense. There was no way Supervillain—Supervillain!—was interested in them of all people.

“What about that video could have appealed to you? The whole city saw what happened, maybe the whole world. Everyone saw what a joke I was. It's hilarious how bad I am at being a villain. And all those weird things I do, fidgeting and throwing up and all the rest, they must be funny too because I'm a trend now. Why would you involve yourself with that? I'm a total embarrassment!"

Without warning, Supervillain's warm hand slid over their cheek and cupped the left side of their face. Villain wasn’t sure when they crossed the room, but here they were crouched in front of them. They tipped their head up at them, and those shiny eyes drilled earnestly into their eye sockets, maybe saw right through them. Their faces were still a couple feet apart, but it felt as if Supervillain was whispering straight in their ear.

"I want to protect you."

"W-what?"

"Let me protect you," Supervillain said.

Villains mouth had gone completely dry. This whole situation was strange, but a part of them wanted to believe it was true. They were just so tired of hurting.

"Prove that you really want to,” they finally said. “If you can…then ok.”

“That should be easy enough,” Supervillain grinned. They leaned in closer, hands bracing on either armrest. The heat of their breath ghosted against their cheek.

Villain squeezed their eyes shut and tried to steady their trembling. They weren’t prepared for this!

Supervillain’s forehead knocked against Villain’s, the tips of their noses just shy of brushing and… And then they stopped.

Villain cracked open their eyes. Supervillain stared straight through them, irises alive with a deep fire. Gone was the sharp, measuring look they’d maintained most of the night. This was hungrier, more destructive. Without breaking eye contact, they gently rubbed their forehead back and forth against Villain’s.

“I’ll start with the one who hurt you tonight.”

Part Two

#villain x villain #villain x supervillain #writing snippet #hero x villain #villain #creative writing #heroes and villains #fiction #heroes and villains community #superheroes and villains #hmmm does this ending feel too close Big Bad or Date or Die?#beginning to worry that all my supervillain x villian stories are the same

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imaginationintowords · 4 years

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Folklore [song series]

mad woman

Modern Day AU! Bucky Barnes x OC!Reader; Bucky Barnes x Natasha Romanoff

Plot: Inspired by Taylor Swift’s new album Folklore. The story follows the timeline of Bucky and Elizabeth’s relationship throughout the years.

Word count: 1803

Warnings: swearing, angst

Previous part

Series Masterlist

Age: 17

Year: 2011

Location: Brooklyn, NY

Elizabeth had the whole weekend to prepare for what was to come when she went to school on Monday.

Word had quickly spread about what happened at her place with Bucky.

She decided that Saturday morning to block Inez's number, along with a few other students. Everyone had shifted over the villain role from Bucky to Betty, Elizabeth. She even set all her social media accounts to private, blocking those who were being nasty towards her.

To be honest she wasn't even sure if Bucky had even gotten as much crap over the last month that she was getting in just the last 48 hours.

How is she the woman he cheated on suddenly the villain?

Was she harsh to him? Maybe.

Did he deserve it? In her eyes, yes. Her reaction was a normal reaction for any person that would be in that position.

She had given him everything the last three years.

She was gone for one summer and he betrayed it all within those ten weeks. He couldn't even tell her why when she first found out a month ago. Now here he was showing up uninvited, crashing a student council meeting, not caring how it all made her look.

She could no longer hold it in. She just snapped.

Now here she was the bad guy, because Bucky decided to make his infidelity public. Because he didn't give her the respect of having this discussion in private.

She had never felt more disrespected. She had never felt more betrayed in her life.

She had never felt more alone.

Sure she had other friends besides Bucky and Steve, but once word got around about her outburst, no one really cared about her feelings but more about the gossip.

Forget student council, the secretary, Kelsea Cash texted her Sunday night saying:

"Student council doesn't need any bad press. So it's best if you just sit out until student elections. Also, if you think about running for student body president this year, it's probably best if you don't."

That text crushed Elizabeth. She had given student council that last three years of her life. The meeting that they had on Friday was partly discussing about her running for student body President, with Steve running as her Vice President. She had done an amazing job all throughout high school her classmates had praised her and wanted to help her run again. Looks like all those years were a waste. Just like her relationship with Bucky.

She'd be lying if she said she didn't cry herself to sleep that night. The anxiety and sadness seeping in. She knew she couldn't fake sick because her parents would ask what was wrong. She had already lied about why she and Bucky broke up, she couldn't lie to them about this.

She took her time getting ready that Monday morning. She didn't want to get to school until the last possible moment.

When she pulled into her assigned parking spot in the student parking lot, she waited until she heard the school bell ring.

Elizabeth made the dreaded walk up the steps that led into the hallways of her awaiting doom.

As soon as she stepped foot through the doors all eyes were on her. As if everyone was awaiting her arrival.

She slowly made her way to her homeroom, looking down at her feet to avoid eye contact. She could hear the whispers, she's pretty sure everyone wanted her to hear them.

"What a bitch."

"Bucky really dodged a bullet."

"Never knew she could be so mean."

"It's always the quiet ones."

"Bucky deserves better."

Elizabeth fought back the tears, her main focus was just to get to her homeroom. She was going to have to take today one class at a time.

As soon as she got into class she found her seat and let out a sigh of relief once she was seated. That was until a shadow loomed over her desk.

She looked up to find Alex Taylor standing over her desk, with a sly smile on his face.

"Hey Elizabeth," he gently greeted her.

His soft tone took her by surprise, but Elizabeth knew better than to let her guard down.

"Hi Alex," she said trying to ignore by pulling out her notebook.

"Listen, I'm sorry about what happened. Barnes shouldn't have done that. It wasn't cool," he sat down in the desk next her, which was not his assigned seat.

"Uh thanks."

"Barnes never did deserve you," Alex's voice got quieter, he leaned over his breath now on her face.

"Bet I can make you forget all about that jerk," he whispered in her ear, placing his hand on her upper thigh.

Elizabeth abruptly shot out of her seat.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" she shrieked, alarming the whole class along with the teacher, who started making her way towards them.

"Come on Liz, let me take you out."

"How many times do I have to tell you no?"

"Do you not know what that means? I don't want to go out with you Alex. Not now, not ever," Elizabeth continued, she caught a glimpse of the class recording her outburst.

"What is going on here? Mr. Taylor. Ms. Sanchez," Ms. Marquez asked looking between the two.

"I was just trying to be a friend to Betty here," Elizabeth snapped her head towards Alex at the mention of her nickname, "When she totally freaked out on me."

Elizabeth was speechless.

"Everyone back to your original assigned seats. And put your phones away," Ms. Marquez instructed, walking back to her desk.

"No wonder Barnes cheated on you," Alex whispered to Elizabeth's face.

What happened next not only took the whole class by surprise, but Elizabeth herself as well.

The sound of the slap was heard throughout the classroom.

"Bitch," Alex sneered, clutching his face.

The sudden realization sunk in.

"Oh my gosh. I'm so sorry. I-I don't know what came over me."

"Elizabeth, principal's office, now."

Elizabeth gathered her things and made her way to the principal's office. She was completely stunned. She couldn't believe she just did that.

When she arrived the secretary informed her that Principal Alvarez was waiting for her inside.

"Ms. Sanchez, please have a seat," Principal Alvarez pointed to the seat on the other side of her desk.

Elizabeth closed the door behind her and took the seat opposite the female adult.

"When Ms. Marquez called to tell me why you would be making your way up here, I was completely stunned. Never would I have thought you would be in here for a physical altercation."

Elizabeth glanced down at her hands on her lap. She was completely embarrassed by her actions and behavior.

"Now normally I would call a student's parents or suspend them."

"What?" Elizabeth's head snapped up.

"But this is a very difference circumstance. You have never gotten into any trouble. You've been a star student, and unfortunately even though the staff and I are adults, we aren't privy to school gossip," Principal Alvarez informed her.

"Oh," Elizabeth's eyes widen.

She knew. Everyone knew.

"Being a teenager isn't easy. Especially in today's modern technology world. I can't even imagine half of the things you kids have to go through. The mean, hurtful comments they follow you all home, it's not fair."

Elizabeth glanced back down at her hands, to try and hide the tears threatening to fall.

"I'm sorry you're going through all of this, and having to deal with classmates' inputs. You're first heartbreak is never easy. It's hard enough having to deal with it privately, but having to deal with it publicly while in high school. It's tough."

Elizabeth could no longer hold in her sobs. She covered her face with her hands to try and contain the sound. She could hear Principal Alvarez get up from her chair. She sat on the chair next to Elizabeth, and gently rubbed her back.

"It's not fair," Elizabeth sobs, "I didn't do anything wrong, yet everyone hates me."

"How is all of this my fault? How am I the bad guy? All I ever did was love James. I gave him everything. Everything. And now I have nothing."

"I'm sure you have some friends you can talk to through this," Principal Alvarez says.

"No. Not really. People just want the gossip. No one. Not one single person has asked how I've been," she looks up to meet Principal Alvarez's eyes, "My best friends were Steve, Bucky, and Peggy. Peggy is no longer here. And of course Steve is siding with Bucky. They've known each other their entire lives. And the way Steve looked at me on Friday night after what I told Bucky, forget it. He's never going to talk to me ever again."

"I'm sure he'll come around eventually."

"No, he won't. He's very loyal to Bucky. He isn't going to turn his back on someone who's practically his brother."

"Have you thought about telling your parents?"

"No. I don't want them to know. It's embarrassing enough that you know," Elizabeth sniffles, wiping away the last of her tears, "Thank-you though. You didn't have to let me of so easily."

"Like I've said before, you're a star student. Plus you're going through enough, I'm not about to put more on your plate," she patted Elizabeth's knee before getting up and going back to her side of the desk.

"Now do you think you'll be able to handle the rest of the day? I will let you head home early," Principal Alvarez asked, standing behind her desk.

"No," Elizabeth shakes her head, "I have to stay. I have to at least get through today. I can't let them know they're getting to me."

"Smart girl," Alvarez winked at her, smiling, "My door is always open if you need to come by again today."

"Thank-you, I'll keep that in mind," Elizabeth nodded, grabbing her backpack and heading for the door, "Bye."

"Bye."

As Elizabeth walked out of the office, she glanced at the clock over the secretary's desk, everyone would already be in first period. She grabbed a slip from the secretary excusing her tardiness.

She walked through the silent halls, taking her time, the only sounds coming from her boots clacking. Elizabeth knew that to get through today she is going to have to show everyone that they're not getting to her.

In order to get through today she's going to have to give them what they've been calling her.

She's going to have to be a cold bitch.

This is the new Elizabeth.

Naïve, sweet, innocent Elizabeth is gone.

This Elizabeth will no longer show people what they've done to her. She will no longer be open with herself.

This Elizabeth is going to be just like all of them.

Selfish.

The only person that truly cares about her is herself.

This is the Elizabeth they've created.

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spiritus-sonne · 3 years

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"Humanimality"

July 9, 2021; Explores themes of animality & monstrosity in numerous media stories and within my own self

So I’ve been watching various shows lately, skipping between different ones or different episodes or seasons, to the whims of my mind, but they generally have some element of human animality in them, and it’s interesting to me to compare and contrast how that theme is handled in the different series and even more interesting is how I personally respond to watching them in regards to that theme. I rewatched the anime series “Claymore” since I hadn’t watched it in a long time and honestly didn’t remember much from it beyond there being women in it that could shapeshift to monstrous forms. “Claymore” handles the contrast between human and nonhuman through themes of monstrosity and heavily blurs the line that supposedly separates human from monster, including showing that some of the claymores (the half-monster women) can surpass that line into physical monstrosity beyond what others believe are their limits (to which they wouldn’t be able to retain, let alone return to, being human in mind), but they still manage to come back to their human side. Although the show doesn’t instill any ‘shifty’ feelings in me despite the large amount of nonhuman shifting it shows, my reception of it is overall positive in how they handled the themes of humanity and monstrosity, though I think it could have used a bit more emphasis on human not necessarily being an “opposite of monstrosity” kind of thing since humans can very much act monstrous to extents Earthly nonhuman animals don’t or can’t.

Then there’s the CW’s “Beauty and the Beast” series, which I vary as to how much I like how the show is handled depending on the episode and season. Part of season 3 was leaving me feeling tired and annoyed at the over-glorifying and romanticizing of the concept of “being human” and acting like there is some hard line between human and animal and if someone (such as the main character, Vincent) passes that line they are forever a monster and can’t return to ‘being human’ no matter what. By the end of the season they loosened that hard line and heavily implied that even if such a line is crossed the individual can still return to being more human rather than being “doomed to forever be a monster” (in the bad, derogatory sense). So my response to how they handled the human verses animality theme improved as the season went on. I have a special fondness for most of the first season, though, especially since Vincent’s animality was front-and-center for much of it and it was something he was much more learning to control and handle as being part of how he was and how to live with being more animalistic at times. As opposed to some parts of the series in which he tries to live as ‘human’ as he can, shifting to his animal side as little as possible, and leaving that shifting or the use of his heightened senses to basically being a tool uncommonly used to fight off some foe or to help ‘solve’ a case. I do wish the show included a stronger sense of Vincent embracing instead of rejecting or hiding his animality, and that the line between human and animal was treated as being much more blurry instead of a bold, solid line. Maybe some therians would be better at writing something like that. Heck, I’d write fanfiction like that if I was actually any good at writing fiction--which I’m totally not.

I’ve tried to get into Freeform’s “Siren” series about mermaids--I watched the first season but kind of slowly got through it and barely managed to watch through the 2nd season’s first episode. Which is unfortunate because I rather like the design of the mermaids--their physical design with fangs, claws, and gills, but also their mentality as predators and pack animals. Yet there’s just something about the characters or how the story is told or something else that just makes it difficult for me to really get into the series and enjoy it. I do kind of dislike that parts of it focus on making the merfolk more “human”, including there being one that’s basically lived decades of her life out of the water being essentially totally human and out of touch with her roots of being a mermaid. I feel like they took a great concept of merfolk that are animalistic humanoids and tried to ‘humanize’ it too much for the sake of a longer story (whereas if it was a shorter story like a single movie, maybe they could better leave the merfolk more animalistic--though hopefully not as the villains).

The anime series “Vampire Knight” is another I recently have started rewatching. Despite the number of vampires in it, the only one I really connect with is one of the main characters, Zero. The story in part deals with him coming to terms with slowly transitioning into a vampire, a more feral type than the other recurring vampire characters in the show, and there’s something about him and his story that I connect with and gets me a bit vampire-shifty. Most of the vampires in it are just “too human” feeling to me. Which is kind of funny because my own kind of vampire, blutpirs, are still overall rather human in form and mentality, though they can do minor shapeshifting (eyes, teeth, nails) and do have more cat-like mental aspects at times, but I think it comes down to me personally experiencing being a blutpir, non-physically, through times in which I feel not “just human”--the shiftyness is an important aspect of how I experience my vampire ‘type.

When it comes to the game "Prototype" I love that it allows the player to be a humanoid monster that can fight and consume others. It blurs the line between human and monster and is morally grey about the main character's position as a monster that needs to consume others (be the prey human or monster, civilian or military--it's kind of left to the player as to who or what to consume) in order to survive and heal, and even potentially be a hero of sorts. I enjoy being able to play as an animalistic, monstrous predator and maybe I'll go back to replaying it sometime as it's been a long time since I've played it. But I do have a strong fondness of the protagonist that goes into teratophilia.

Another TV show, MTV's "Teen Wolf", can make me feel kind of shifty, as well. I do like that, at least in the seasons I watched, there was a lot of embracing of the characters' nonhumanity, that being nonhuman or partially human didn't automatically mean "bad" or "evil", with the villains being human or nonhuman but it really came down to the individual's personality instead of their species. And I rather like that approach but it's uncommon for me to come across.

Lastly, a somewhat odd one is the 2000 Syfy series "Invisible Man" which can get me a little shifty at times. I said odd because it may seem a story about an invisible man wouldn't deal much with themes of animality and monstrosity but it really depends on the angle in which it's approached (I've seen and heard of other invisible man stories exploring monstrous themes, though, but this one in particular really stands out to me). The protagonist is fully human but due to certain factors, he has times of basically ferality and a predatory mindset that I kind of relate to with my vampire 'type, possibly more so because ultimately my own animality isn't something that's physical, it's a mental and behavioral thing despite me of course being fully physically human. I also like that the transition in mentality is preceded by severe pain, which kind of feels like a parallel with the pain of physical transformation that many shapeshifters are depicted going through.

I do have a soft spot for numerous stories that involve a person just coming into a new power or aspect of themselves that is animalistic in some form and them learning to control and/or embrace it. It's just something that I tend to connect with and enjoy both from a monstrous and animalistic otherkin/therian perspective and from a monster-hearted perspective. These stories leave me kind of empathizing with the character, feeling myself in their place and connecting with their struggle to balance human and nonhuman in their life and selves. But when/if the story turns toward fully rejecting that animality or being “saved” by becoming fully human, then my interest vastly wanes and the connection is lost. I’m so tired of stories about how being human is “the best thing ever” and is infinitely better than being nonhuman, especially animalistic, despite the fact that humans ourselves are animals and animalistic. It’s a stupid dichotomy that I’m bored and annoyed at hearing throughout my life.

My mind scrapes around various media--pictures, TV shows, movies, books, etc.--to find stories and characters that don’t give into that tiring theme of “humans are best”, media that I can relate to more in the fact I’m nonhuman and human--blended and fluid, animal and monstrous--because it’s just such a rarity, such a gem, to find those little scraps of this stuff, and unfortunately it sometimes ends up being in the form of a villainous or antagonistic character. I’ve sought out this media since my early childhood, though I’ve tended toward hiding away that kind of thing from others, privately enjoying it because of fear for how others may react to me finding such satiation in the monstrous and the nonhuman humanoids rather than in the ‘glorious solely human’ stuff. I still hide it most of the time from my partner, not really anymore for fear of what they may think but rather out of habit and because privately partaking in it is more comfortable for me, especially if it does get me feeling shifty, and I’m overall okay with that.

I also relate to these fictional 'monsters' in that I feel like I live a "split" life between human and nonhuman, that my nonhumanity is something that remains hidden from most people--albeit, because it has to in that it is so highly non-physical, just mildly behavioral, that others can't be aware of it, rather than it being a physical thing. But there's still that empathy I feel of "I'm hiding my animality and monstrosity from other people for fear of consequences and them not understanding". I feel a deep sense of familiarity and sameness with these animalistic or monstrous humanoid beings. And that's where my monster-heartedness and otherkinity really meet. I know that unfortunately I'm limited my whole life to these nonhuman aspects being so strictly internal and subjective, even though I came to terms about that a long time ago and generally don't have species dysphoria, there's still part of me that wishes I could live this, or part of it, physically and to be loved and cared for by someone else (be they fully human or not) despite this or maybe in part *because* of my nonhumanity. To be loved so much even though the other person can clearly see my monstrosity and animality--that would speak volumes to me.

#alterhuman #otherkin #therian

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ellana-ravenwood · 6 years

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Insecurities shmunsecurities - Bruce Wayne x Insecure!Reader

Summary : Bruce Wayne, your boyfriend, is decided to help you overcome every single insecurities you’ve ever had.

This is a very, VERY self-indulgent fic. As usual, I was feeling extremely insecure about my writing and..What do I do in those instances ? Well, I write (but of course). This is the result. It’s fucking long. Hope you’ll like my poor writing :

You can find my masterlist here : @ella-ravenwood-archives

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Bruce Wayne was curing your insecurities one by one.

Ten months ago, when you first met him, you would have never thought he would be the one to do such a thing.

He looked so full of himself, so confident, so so sure of everything, so at ease in social situations...How could a man like that, better than you in every ways, could pay any attention to you ?

And yet, at that charity ball you organized, he was instantly drawn to you.

It was such a small thing, that charity of yours (you had created it to give better access to books to the disadvantages people of GC), happening in one of the poorest neighborhood in Gotham.

When you sent an invitation to Bruce fucking Wayne, it was as an inside joke you had with your colleagues helping you organizing everything...”Oh, let’s sent a formal invitation to Bruce Wayne, the most powerful and richest man in Gotham, he’ll totally come to our shitty little charity ball right ? Haha hahaha hahaha !!”...You were all quite shocked when he actually showed up, accompanied by all the big name in town.

Needless to say, you exploded the goal you wanted to achieve by raising a shit ton of money !

Yes, at that small little insignificant ball you had organized, expecting only a few middle classed people to come, he was instantly drawn to you, even though he had one of the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen glued to his arm (she was so rude to you...and yet, she was incapable to grasp “Brucie”’s attention like you were !).

Bruce was pretty sure (though at the time he was in total denial) that he fell desperately in love with you when he heard you say : “Do I look like the champagne police lady ?!” to an old and extremely rich woman who was complaining about the low quality of the drinks that were served.

Hell, he realized he was doomed as soon as his eyes laid on you and you shyly and awkwardly smiled at him, waving your hand at him, and in the process, throwing the platter that a waiter was holding into the air, making a huge mess once it hit the floor...

He loved the way you didn’t care he was Bruce Wayne, and talked to him like you would to any other person ! He loved the ways you were so...unimpressed with him. The way you looked so out of place amongst the rich and powerful of Gotham. Not that you were les worthy than them, oh no, just...You were so uninterested in power and money and appearances, it was so refreshing !

Bruce always smiles when he remembers your reaction when he asked for your number. The way you furrowed your brow, narrowed your eyes at him and said : “I don’t play games Mr. Wayne”, pointing at him accusingly.

And the way your cute eyebrows raised in surprised when he told you that he wasn’t playing any games, trying to pour all the honesty available in him in his words so you’d believe him (he was really telling the truth !).

He must have been convincing because, ten months ago, you gave him your number, totally stunned that a great man like Bruce Waybe would even talk to you...and since then, he made it his mission to show you that you weren’t as worthless as you thought, quite the contrary !

************

The first insecurities he cured was in regards of a certain “Catwoman”.

After you gave him your number, it didn't take long for the both of you to actually date, and though at the time things were still kept secret (his way to preserve you from unwanted attention, wether it was medias or villains), it was getting quite serious.

You had discovered he was the Batman quite early on...before dating him in fact, you already had strong suspicions (only Bruce Wayne made sense, though he was covering his tracks quite well with his fake playboy persona and with his public “money” support to the bat).

He didn’t know yet that you knew, but given how understanding you were when he suddenly had to go, or when he didn’t spend the night...He kinda guessed you must have known. But he wasn’t quite ready to tell you, to let you enter his dark World, he had to “preserve” you you know ?

Yes. You knew he was Batman and it wasn’t a problem. You had absolutely no intention to stop him, on the contrary, you were certain Gotham City desperately needed him.

You were worried, sure, but it was so important, you really understood (another reason he fell in love with you...you understood him so completely).

No, what kinda bothered you about this all thing were the rumors about him and Catwoman (that you knew was Selina Kyle, of course).

Now you couldn’t outright ask him could you ? You weren’t suppose to know he was Batman and you wanted him to tell you ! It was important that he did, it would mean that he really trusted you (he already did but again, he wanted to preserve you from the complicated side of his life as much as he could).

No, you couldn’t just ask him, you had to be smart about it.

One night, one of the rare ones he stayed with you (Batwoman, his cousin, was on duty...later, Alfred would say that he knew you were the one because only for you would he skip patrol) and, with your most innocent look, you casually asked him, as you were cuddling against him after an amazing love making session :

-So hum...D’you ever have a serious relationship before ?

Bruce smiled at your tone that you’d try to be as casual as possible without quite succeeding, and at the way you didn’t look up at him, your face kinda buried in his chest..He knew you were blushing and that it took you a lot of courage to ask him that.

You wanted to make it sound like it wasn’t a big deal, but he knew better.

With a bit of a mocking voice, he said :

-A serious relationship “before” ? Before what ?

Your head snapped up and the hurt look he spotted in your eyes made his heart drop and he instantly regretted his joke.

By instinct, his fingers tangled in your hair and he caressed your scalp soothingly. You didn’t say anything, as your eyes bore into his deeply, and he felt so disarmed in front of you right now...It should have frightened him, how you made him so vulnerable so easily, but it did the opposite.

It made him love you more, if that was even possible.

In a soft and low voice he says :

-Yes. Yes I had a somewhat serious thing with a woman before you...but let me tell you right now that nothing even compares to what I feel for you now.

You don’t look too convinced and, still looking at him, you just murmur :

-Selina Kyle ?

If he’s surprised that you guessed that right, he doesn’t show it (another reason he loves you...you’re a smart cookie).

He wrapped his free arm around you, as his other hand still ran through your hair and he answered :

-Yes. Selina Kyle. But believe me honey, you eclipse her in every way !

Bruce knew you didn’t believe him, but he couldn’t find the right words, in that moment, to reassure you...

It’s about a week after that, at a gala, that he cured fully this insecurity of yours.

************

You hate being alone at one of those little soirée, but you understand...he went to get some drinks, and he always mingle with people on his way.

You’ve been going out together publicly for a few months now, and it’s not as bad as you thought...

Sure, tabloid magazines keep releasing articles trying to guess how long it would last (none of them had the right answer. They were all talking about “a few months at most”, while you’d be together until your death decades later), but most people (though extremely jealous of you or of Bruce to have you), couldn’t deny that you made a great and well assorted couple (though you thought you weren’t beautiful enough for him...how wrong you were, especially since your natural aura made you just so damn charming and attractive).

You had found a somewhat hidden spot in a corner of the room, while Bruce wad doing what he had to do, when you first met her.

-So you’re the famous (Y/N) (Y/L/N) everyone is talking about uh ?

You turned around and...There she was.

Selina Kyle.

Your breath caught in your throat, and your eyes widened a bit...She was so...so...so much “more” than you.

More talented, more mysterious, smarter, sexier, funnier, her hair were better, her eyes brighter, her legs thinner...Everything about her was outplaying you.

You smile shyly at her and you’re surprised by the warm smile she gives you back, you were definitely not expecting that...Selina had wanted to be a bitch to you, after all, it was because of you that her “on and off” relationship with Bruce was now definitely “off”...But you were just too cute.

-Famous I don’t know but...yeah, it’s me.

It takes all of the will in you not to back away when Selina walk straight to you and stops mere inches from you, staring you up and down.

You’re usually witty and sarcastic, fearless in front of people but...there’s something in Selina Kyle that intimidates the Hell out of you...She’s just so much better than you !

With a smile that would have seduced anyone (and oh man was she attractive ! Yummy !) she says :

-Oh you’re famous alright. Not just because you’re dating Bruce by the way. I heard you were...How did they put it again ? Oh right, “The Comeback Queen”. Apparently, you’re quite a quick thinker and don’t let any of them -she points at the people around you- walk on your feet. Oh don’t blush sweetheart, I like it !

Her last words make you blush even more and you look around a bit desperately, hoping Bruce would come back soon.

You know she sees you’re uncomfortable and you know she thrives because of it...but you can’t help it, she’s so...UGH !

You can definitely see what Bruce saw in her.

Little did you know that, as she looks at you intently, she was thinking exactly the same thing about you. She could see what Bat saw in you...You don’t say anything and she continues :

-So...it’s because of you uh, that Ba...Bruce doesn’t want to sleep with me anymore ?

Your blush is gone in an instant, and Selina realizes she must have awaken “The Comeback Queen”...But you still don’t say anything. Oh no. You do worst.

You just turn around slightly away from her and ignore her utterly.

You understood what she was doing, and she made one mistake : talking about Bruce and sleeping with him (you’d never admit it but it filled you with happiness to know he refused her because of you...you’d discover later that Bruce wasn’t the cheating kind at all, he could never inflict such pain to someone he cared about, he’d leave them if he wasn’t in love anymore...Just like he told Selina it was over right after your first kiss with him...)

Yes, Selina Kyle made a mistake talking about him.

You had understood quickly she came over to “test” you, to tease you a little bit...And it was working, but she should have continued talking about you, and not utter a word about him.

Because it awakened something in you, the part that couldn’t help but fight back, even when it knew its adversary was better...And here you were, ignoring her. It completely stunned her...she wasn’t used to be ignored.

But before she could say something else (you could see her preparing to say something in your peripheral vision), you felt a protective hand wrap around your waist.

Bruce.

He had a worried look on his face, his eyes switching between you and Selina...He knew how iffy you were about Catwoman, knowing it was his only other serious relationship...He knew you felt inferior to her, though he didn’t understand why.

You were so perfect to him. Selina was great but you...Oh you were something else entirely. It tore his heart apart to know that you didn’t even know it...

-Good evening Selina.

He says, a bit on edge, as you turn to him. But you smile brightly at him, which reassures him a bit. He says :

-So...I see you’ve met (Y/N).

You don’t leave her time to respond as you go :

-Oh yeah, we’ve met -you turn to Selina an obvious and exaggerated fake smile on your face-, Selina Kyle, the woman you’ve stop sleeping with because of me apparently.

It’s quite satisfying, really, to see all color leave her face like that. And the severe, almost angry look Bruce gives her ? Priceless. In a cold voice he says :

-What did I say, Selina ?

But the woman, momentarily disarmed in front of your fake-smile (you changed mood so fast !) was back once again in her normal self and nonchalantly says :

-Well to be honest, your speech was so long and disgustingly cheesy that I don’t recall everything really...Oh fine fine don’t make that face Bruce, it makes you look ugly. You said to leave her alone, because you love her -she turns to you- really sweetheart I’m making it short, because it was really long and boring.

You’re a bit stunned by her word, and you’re so glad Bruce talks first because you just didn’t know what to say :

-Let me refresh your memory. I said that I would appreciate if you left my girlfriend, (Y/N) here, alone. If you wouldn’t do to her what you do to everyone, which is toying with her. Don’t interrupt me please Selina, I know you don’t always toy with people, I know what we had was real...But here’s the key word : “was”. We both knew it was a mere infatuation. There’s a deep friendship between us, yes...but no love. Not romantic at least. I can’t lie to you and tell you I don’t care about you, because I really do...But I don’t love you. I love her. I won’t be uselessly cruel by explaining to you how much I love her, but...You know don’t you ? And so please, she’s already so...unsure of herself, so leave her alone. I thought I was clear on that...

Selina takes a quick look at you (oh you’re just so damn cute, blushing and not really knowing what to do, planted in front of them like that !) and then back at Bruce, yawns (for good measure, because his speeches are always so damn serious and boring) and says :

-You were clear. I was just...Curious. Who stole the Bat...bachelor’s heart ? Genuinely and fully stole it ? Not just like me, not just conquering a part of it...earning it completely. I was just curious. And you sweetheart -she turns to you once more-, I got nothing on you. You know, you can call me a lot of thing, but what I’m not is modest. I know I’m beautiful, I know I’m intelligent, I know I’m great really...And I am completely honest when I say that, if you’re not better than me, at least we’re equal. Oh but why are you so cute ? Don’t make such a face I’m serious. Besides, I see the way he looks at you. He never looked at me like that. And I just used all my quotas of compliments for the year so...If you’ll excuse me, I have to go steal a few things. I mean...I have to go...mingle...With...rich men.

You can’t help but smile at her, and feel a surge of...confidence ? Is that how it feels ? Surely, if even a woman like Selina Kyle said all those things, it must mean there were (part) true right ?

Elegantly and nonchalantly (this woman was a total badass), Selina takes the glass of champagne from the hand of a man and turns around back to you and Bruce and says, a mischievous smile on her lips :

-If you ever break up, call me.

You narrow your eyes at her and Bruce groans :

-Selinaaa...

-Oh Brucie, you thought I was talking to you ? Oh no my dear, I’m talking to your girlfriend there. I quite like her really...

And on that note, she winks at you, making you blush like crazy, and leaves behind a very stunned Bruce and a quite flattered you.

On that night, thanks to Bruce and his speech, that sprawled the Catwoman herself to shower you with compliments...You were completely and utterly cured of your insecurities towards her.

Yes. Yes maybe you weren’t better than her but...Bruce chose you. He refused her. He told her he loved you. Only you. And his speech...

Yes. Insecurities cured. Gone. Forever. So much that you became quite good friends with Selina (it was funny how Bruce was now the jealous one).

And it was all because Bruce had decided to show you how amazing you were. Because he had decided to chase all your insecurities away...

This was a good first step.

************

But the biggest and most important insecurities your Broosh was able to eradicate from your mind, was the one concerning your writing abilities.

Things were getting really really serious between you and Bruce (he was more and more thinking about asking you to marry him), and he realized that it was probably time to introduce you to his best friend...Clark Kent.

And so here you were, on a fucking helicopter, direction : Metropolis.

You’ve never been to Metropolis. It was quite an interesting city really...Like a cleaner, safer Gotham. Though the gargoyles were replaced by neons and huge flashy adds, the rain by a blue and clear sky, the dark color of every building by glass windows that reflected the sun...Yup, it was like a parallel universe, a Gotham that wasn’t gritty and dark.

A city for a Superman really.

And here he was, in front of you (though you promised Bruce not to even make a hint about the fact that you knew he was Superman...that too, you guessed yourself, and you thought it was hilarious that he wrote all those articles, in the daily planet, about himself !).

You met them at a diner in the outskirt of town, a calm place where no paparazzis would try and snatch pictures of you all.

You sat down and...immediately, you felt a bit uneasy.

Why were they both looking at you like that ? With a stupid smile on their face, and a bit of...weird...awe ? What ?

Was it because they never thought Bruce would settle down ? Yeah, it probably was that...

But of course, it wasn’t.

Without your knowledge, Bruce had sent one of your novel to Lois Lane, famed journalist and best seller author (she even won a pulitzer price !).

It was driving your boyfriend crazy to know that you were so full of talent.

He was one of the only person, along with Alfred, that read your stories and he thought they were the most brilliant things in the World !

Bruce wasn’t much of a big reader, because he never really had time to do so but...your stuffs ?

It made him feel like he was a kid again, who was dreaming about adventures and had fantasy about being a hero and such !

Your stories made him feel like he was in them, like he was truly part of them, like he was...transported in another world ! The way you wrote, your style...it filled him with so many emotions !

You didn’t believe him when he told you, and he wished you had been there when he was reading it (but of course, whenever he was reading one of your work you’d make sure not to be there, in fear of dying of cringe while he’d read something you wrote in front of you) so you could have seen him laugh, cry, be angry etc etc while reading your stories !

He wish you could see the effect it had on him, and that you’d believe him when he said he loved them, that you’d believe his excitement when he finished one and ran to you to tell you how great it was !

After all, he was a man with the reputation to be quite stoic and serious ! Couldn’t you see how childish and boyish your stories rendered him ? How he almost jumped on his spot talking about all his favorite characters and how that particular twist blew his mind away ?

Couldn’t you see that your stories turned him into a huge fanboy ?!

No. No of course you couldn’t see it. You rarely believe him when he was complimenting you...Especially not on your writing.

Oh it just tore him apart to know that you thought you were a talentless woman ! And so he did something, that maybe he shouldn’t have (he didn’t know how you were going to react)...He decided to send one of your manuscript (his favorite of yours), to Lois Lane, a renown literally critic at that.

And when he received a call from her, at three in the morning, while he was on patrol, and she started to ramble about how great the plot was and how she love this character and hated that one and blahblahblah could she send it to her publisher already ?! ...Bruce knew he had to arrange a meeting.

Clark read the book a few days after, and Bruce received the same excited call...The bat totally surprised his friends by being as enthusiastic about it as he was ! It wasn’t often, that you could hear the mighty Batman sound like a little excited child !

And here you were, unaware that you had in front of you your second and third biggest fans (the first one was Bruce of course), and wondering why they just couldn’t stop staring at you like that !

-It’s so nice to finally meet you !

Clark starts, as you all sit down around the diner table. Lois continues :

-Yes yes ! We couldn’t wait to finally...meet you !

You’re a bit weirded out by their enthusiasm, but with a little smile you answer :

-Yeah same. Bruce told me lots about you two, I was looking forward to finally see you as well.

Bruce shifts awkwardly next to you and you give him a curious look...that quickly turns into a suspicious one. You narrow your eyes at him and say :

-Ok, what’s going on ?

Clark and Lois can’t help but be impressed at the inflexion in your voice, at the glare you give Bruce and the way he reacts to you...You’re the first one that seems to intimidate the goddamn Batman !

Very fast and almost inaudible, your Broosh says :

-Imighthavesentthemoneofyourbook.

But it doesn’t matter that he spoke fast, or that he barely made a sound...you understood enough. Suddenly, a horrified expression spreads across your face and you look at the couple in front of you, genuinely scared.

-Wh...What ? Ho...How could you Bruce ? I trusted you in...keeping those...for...For you...

You’re actually pretty hurt, that he would do such a thing. Sending one of your book to “strangers” ? Sure they were his friends but...you didn’t know them.

And Lois was one of your idol. Ever since you were young you loved reading her articles in the Daily Planet (that was also published in Gotham), her writing style was so eloquent and elegant ! And the book she wrote about Superman ? It made you tear up so many times, it was so beautiful !

And Bruce knew you admired her ! In fact, you were so nervous about that lunch date ! And here he was, giving her your goddamn shitty book, giving her one of your terrible writing and...

-I’m sorry my love but it just killed me that you thought it was bad. You were never going to believe me, I just had to...To show it to someone else !

-It’s not that I don’t believe you Bruce ! It’s just that...well you can’t give me an impartiale opinion, because I’m your girlfriend ! Of course you’re gonna like what I write, or pretend to like it !

-Yes well you’re wrong but you know, you won’t believe me anyway. Now if I send it to someone who doesn’t know you ? Who isn’t friend with you ? Then you know you’ll have an honest opinion right ! You read her book reviews in the Daily Planet, you know she always says what she genuinely thinks about a story !

You gasp and hide your face in your hands, shaking it vigorously ! Oh my God he’s right ! She’s a really good book reviewer and never lies ! And now it’s going to be the worst time of your life, your idol telling you how your book sucks and how you should stop writing and...

-I just have one question for you, (Y/N).

Slowly, tentatively, you tear away fingers by fingers from your face and shyly look at Lois. She smiles at you warmly, and you sit up a bit in your seat (not before giving Bruce a reproachful look though...he sinks a bit in his own seat and avoids your gaze, stunning Clark like...The Hell ? Bruce was shrinking in his seat, embarrassed ? Wow, you must really be something...but that he already knew, after all, he read your book too).

-Hum...What ?

You ask in a little scared voice. Lois’ smile widens and she says :

-The ending totally killed me, please tell me you wrote a second book ?

Bruce sprungs up in his chair and says :

-Yes ! Yes it’s suppose to be a trilogy ! She’s almost done with writing the first draft of the second book ! I read it over her shoulder when she writes in bed, it’s even more brilliant than the first one !

Your boyfriend’s actual genuine enthusiast surprises you. He...reads over your shoulder when you write in bed ? You haven’t even noticed, to engrossed in your writing. And the way his eyes suddenly shone with excitement...Could it be ?

Could it be that he actually really likes your writing ?

All of a sudden, Bruce, Clark and Lois speaks all at the same time eagerly, talking about their theories of what might happen in the next installment of your stupid and terrible book and...Wow.

Slow down a minute. They...like it ? They actually like it ?

They speculates about what might happen ? They’re thrilled about it all ? THEY SHIP SOME OF YOUR CHARACTERS TOGETHER !? HELL THEY EVEN GAVE NAME TO SAID SHIPS ?! WHAAAAAAAT ?!

You listen to them for the next hour, rambling about your story, about how great it is and how amazing your writing style is, how entranced by it they all are and...you start to believe them ? No...impossible ! And yet.

Yet you cannot hide your idiotic smile, or the way you just want to laugh, or the sudden surges of happiness that attack you.

They like it. They genuinely like it. No one can be that good of an actor...They...They actually fucking like it !

-Yes (Y/N), no joke ! I think it’s amazing ! In fact, I was really excited about this first meeting because I wanted to ask you if you’d allow me to show it to my publisher ? I think they’d love to publish this story of yours ! They really would ! But I know Bruce didn’t even tell you that he’d sent it to us so...Thought I’d ask first of course. I can’t believe you thought it was bad !

Lois tells you, and you’re too stunned to react. You hazily listen to Bruce saying :

-Right ? It’s crazy that she thinks it’s awful right ? Tell her it’s not just me being in love with her talking, please tell her how fucking great she is !

It makes Lois and Clark smile, how smitten with you their friend is, and...well, they tell you the truth.

Yes. You’re writing is great. It made them feel a wide range of things, and left them wanting for more.

For the entirety of lunch time, you discuss your stories with them, they give you all their honest opinion and...you believe them. Sure, you don’t think you’re the best writer ever and such, like they keep saying but...maybe you’re not so bad ?

It fills Bruce with happiness, to know that you’re slowly changing your mind about yourself. It fills him with..so many things, to see you smile as your idol, Lois, is telling you in details why she loves your stories (feedbacks are so important for a writer) and to see you laugh at Clark’s comment on why he hates that particular characters of yours (that of course, he’s suppose to hate).

In that moment, you’re overly grateful that Bruce crossed your path one day.

Because day after day, hell hours after hours, he makes you feel like you’re worth something. He makes you feel like you’re...Someone important.

Talented. Beautiful. Intelligent. Sexy. Smart. Witty.

Like you’re someone who’s special. Genuinely and utterly special.

Bruce Wayne was curing, one by one, all of those insecurities that plagued your life. All of those insecurities that slowly ate you from inside, and made you believe that you were never worthy enough.

Those insecurities that made you date only toxic people who made you feel like you were less than nothing. Those insecurities that stopped you from sending any of your novels to a publisher. Those insecurities that made you stare at the mirror every morning, thinking you were the ugliest of them all.

All of your insecurities, he was fiercely chasing them away.

Because to Bruce Wayne, you were the most special woman in the World, the most unique and talented one, and he’d be damn if he didn’t try to show you how amazing you were.

Slowly, but surely, you started to believe him.

Maybe, just maybe, you weren’t a talentless worthless human being.

Maybe, just maybe, you deserved all those good things happening to you, you deserved to be with a man like Bruce Wayne...You deserved all those praised about your writing.

Maybe. Just Maybe.

______________________________

Yeah. So...There’s that. As usual it got out of hand and ended up being way too fucking long. I didn’t proof read (as usual as well) and I feel like I might erase it. I know I often say that but...eh it’s too fucking long and cringy. SO MUCH CRINNNNNNNGE. That’s what I get for writing such a self-indulgent fic.

Anyway, feedbacks are always welcome (super important once again), hope you liked it and thank you for reading.

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septembercfawkes · 6 years

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Surprise vs. Suspense--Which is Better?

You've probably heard about the concepts of surprise and suspense in writing. You may have even heard them compared and contrasted. From more than one source, I've heard it illustrated with the following story, which I think might actually come from an old Hitchcock movie, but I'm not sure, so if you know where it comes from, please feel free to leave it in the comments.

Surprise

Imagine watching a show where a bunch of guys are playing poker. As an audience we are watching, watching, and watching them play poker. They are talking about everyday things.

Then suddenly a bomb goes off.

That's surprise.

Suspense

In the suspense version, we are watching the same story, except before the poker starts, we see a scene where someone plants the bomb, with a countdown.

The players arrive and we watch essentially the same thing--them playing, talking about everyday things. The only difference is that every once in a while, we get a glimpse of the countdown on the bomb.

That's suspense.

In one version we don't know the bomb is coming. In another we are worried about it.

Usually the follow-up question to this lecture, is, which is better? Surprise or suspense?

Well, with this example, suspense, obviously.

The "surprise" version was actually pretty boring until the bomb went off.

But here is where my opinions start to deviate from this example.

Surprise

The surprise example isn't actually that great. I mean, don't get me wrong, this is a prefect, fast, and easy way to explain the difference to beginning writers, but good surprises are more than that. And in this example, we start with nothing.

A surprise is more effective when you start with at least something. I mean, to write a good surprise, the story still needs to be interesting. It should have other material. It should probably have foreshadowing of some sort.

In fact, some of the best surprises have foreshadowing, but we've misinterpreted it, were blind to it, or didn't have the full context for it.

A great example that comes to mind is The Sixth Sense. People may nitpick at the movie today, but when it came out, audiences' minds were blown. And it wasn't so much over the suspense. It was over the surprise of finding out Bruce Willis's character was actually dead. Sure, you can call those sorts of things "twists"--but I'd argue every twist has an element of surprise. That's why it's a twist.

Some of the best uses of surprise are twists.

It's where you provide the audience with something.

Sometimes the information you provide does not even have to correlate with the surprise. They can be two different things, but what matters is that the audience has something so that they aren't just sitting there getting bored watching people play poker. Usually that something does need to be resolved or play a part in the story, but my point is, the audience should still have story movement and direction.

Sometimes the best surprises happen in stories that take us in one direction, but then suddenly pop up with something unforeseen, completely unforeshadowed.

Surprises often have a place in mysteries, where you think the villain will be one person, only to discover it's someone else. In Sorcerer's Stone, the trio are convinced that Snape is the villain. Sure, there is suspense, about how to get the stone and deal with Snape. But the surpriseis discovering that the villain is Professor Quirrell, not Snape like we all thought. Like the Sixth Sense, one of the things that makes this surprise great is that we can look back at the events of the book with more context and see how it all makes sense. But it was never stated on the page that Quirrell was even a suspect.

Surprise needn't lack power.

I think the point where some people get confused about the surprise-vs.-suspense-and-which-is-better argument is that suspense is required to write a great story. Surprise isn't.

Suspense

Suspense means the audience is worried about what could happen. In the example above, the audience is worried the bomb could go off and kill someone, but they are hoping it doesn't, or that it's discovered, or that the characters get away. Suspense contains an element of worrying.

A classic example is when a character is trying to sneak somewhere without someone else, perhaps someone on guard, knowing. Maybe they are carrying something that might be noisy and give them away. Maybe they have to walk across a forest floor that is littered with twigs that can snap or little rocks that clack. As they make their way to their destination, the audience is sweating it out and on the edge of their seats. Can the character be quiet? Will the guard notice him? The character accidentally snaps a twig. Did the guard hear it? Will he spot the character?

Suspense comes out of tension. It's worry that something (usually) negative may happen. That means there is a hope in the audience that somehow something may not happen. Suspense isn't created by the inevitable. It's created through possibilities. Will the bomb go off? Will the character snap a twig?

Tension is often the promise or potential of problems colliding. Suspense takes place when the audience is invested in and worried about that, and often hoping it doesn't.

Maybe it should be noted, though, that suspense can also actually come from the possibility of something positive happening. Will Suzy get the job of her dreams? Will Frodo be able to throw the Ring into Mount Doom?

So you can hold readers with the promise of something good.

However, you can argue that most suspense set-ups innately have a positive or negative possibility. The positive part of the bomb, is the possibility that the characters will notice it under the poker table and get away safely. The negative part of Suzy's is that she may not get her dream job.

But I'd probably still argue that the bomb set-up is more closely related to the potential for the negative while the Suzy set-up is more closely tied to the positive.

You can play around with this sort of thing in stories. You can give the audience the potential for a really bad and a really good outcome to hike up suspense. Either Frodo destroys the Ring and saves the world, or he doesn't and the world is destroyed. Those are high stakes. The high positive and high negative amplify suspense.

You can have two negatives. Will Prim or will Katniss have to participate in The Hunger Games? Will Katniss have to die or will she have to kill other children? Both options of each are horrible.

You can have two positives. Will Bella find love with Edward or with Jacob? Finding love with either person would be a good thing, except you can't have both. So you get the "Team Edward" and "Team Jacob," and that's where the suspense comes from.

In a double-negative set-up, what pulls the reader in is the dread that something bad probably will happen and wondering what the outcome will be or if there is some way to avoid both possibilities. In a double-positive, what pulls the reader in is the hope that the protagonist gets the same outcome the reader desires.

Epic fantasies like Lord of the Rings, tend to have high positive and high negative set-ups. Dystopians or horrors tend to have double-negatives. Romances are more likely to have double-positives. This is a generality of course, and it's entirely possible to mix-up any one of these. For example, while I feel that in many romances, the protagonist has to pick between two good things (whether they be two people, love vs. a job, love vs. travel), there are still many many set-ups within the story that have a positive and negative, or even a double-negative. So this isn't so much a rule, as it is an observation, and may give you some idea of what your audiences expects.

Which is Better?

Usually this lecture ends with the idea that suspense is a better choice than surprise. While suspense is necessary for a good story, in some story parts, you might find that surprise is actually a more desirable option.The Sixth Sense was great because the people were surprised.

But here's the thing: Why are we telling writers to pick one?

Why not both?

Surely a fantastic story has suspense and surprise.

We know the bomb is under the poker table, but what surprises us is that there is more than one--someone else had the same idea, and it goes off earlier.

We know the bomb is under the poker table, but what surprises us is that one of the players actually came to play with his buddies with a similar intention. He pulls a gun and wants to kill one of the players who previously wronged him. He's actually a cohort of the bomber's, but the bomber didn't know he'd be there.

We know the bomb is under the poker table, but we didn't see the face of who planted it. The surprise is that we later learn it's the target's soft-spoken sister.

Consider when you can choose both.

My Blog Won an Award!

Hi everyone, quick note that some of you may have already seen on social media elsewhere. I found out Sunday night that my writing tip blog won the Writer's Digest award as one of the top writing websites for 2017! I'm so surprised and excited! I had no idea anyone even nominated me or anything. Here's what's even crazier. I apparently won it in April, and I had NO idea until two days ago! There are only 20 websites listed in my category (writing advice), and I can't believe I was listed! It's like a dream come true! Writer's Digest is the top magazine in the writing industry in the U.S., and basically everyone who does writing stuff online knows about the awards. I'm so excited, and I get to put the award up on my site (already did actually). I have daydreamed of someday having this award on this website--I had no idea that "someday" was last April! What?! The only way I found out, was because Writer's Digest made a list of the top 20 out of the top 101 listed sites online on Sunday, and I noticed I was getting traffic from a Writer's Digest page (which shocked the pants off me), so I followed the link and saw myself listed! I don't know who or how many people nominated me, but thank you so much for helping make one of my dreams come true! If you would like to nominate a writing website for 2018, send an email to [email protected] with "101 Websites" in the subject and which website(s) in the body. I'm not opposed to winning again ;) But I'm just floored I won and had no idea nor did I know anyone had even nominated me! Merry Christmas everyone!

P.S. The winner of my 10-page edit giveaway has been selected! I'm waiting to hear back from the winner before I announce who it is.

#writing #writing tip #writing tips #writing tips and tricks #writing helps #writing advice #author #writing help #writblr #writeblr #writerblr #nanowrimo #editor #writing lesson #writing lessons #writing reference #writing references #fanfic #fanfiction

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