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rpbetter · 3 years

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Let me get this straight.. a roleplay resource/meme blog decide to screenshot someone's rules and call them out because of what they wrote? when obviously those who follow them could easily tell. Frist of all whatever rule someone wrote isn't there for one to go out of their way to bad mouth them. If there's something in a persons rule I don't like I'll be an adult and move the fuck on, not screenshot it and drag their name through the dirt. Christ! at this point I don't trust no one who runs those resource/meme blogs. They might hurt someone else with their nosy asses. And that Raven person needs to grow the hell up and stop playing the victim. Do something else with their life, stop living off the internet.

Yep, you've got Phase One down straight, Anon.

And the rest of what you've said is was what got multiple other people called out or differently aggressed at, that's what the response was to the rules being posted and...we're going to say opined on for the point of shaming.

You're right and they were right as well. It doesn't matter how strict or aggressive someone is in their rules, if you find that or anything else about them objectionable, that RPer is obviously not for you. That's a very important part of reading a RPer's rules, it isn't just about their reply speed, preferred topics, or tagging needs. It's also about gauging whether this is a person you're going to work out with or not based on both the actual rules themselves and how you feel about the way they're presented.

You just ascertain that, feel as annoyed or salty or even offended as you so desire, and move on. Like an adult.

It was never going to be that way, though, Raven specifically went to that blog to be a nuisance and call them out. They were already invested in doing so from a perspective of having decided this RPer was being ableist because a post that reflected the statements made in those rules far more nicely and more applicable to their followers was taken that way. Somehow. Raven took it upon themselves to ignore that the mun did make multiple statements regarding the entire thing, including polite ones when their post wasn't being reblogged with maximum hostility and accusations and constant throwing around of the statement "full stop" like lol please, take your own advice. Because, yep, full stop it's valid to have whatever opinion you do, it isn't valid to jump on someone's post like that and be upset when they aren't nice to you about it.

Also took it upon themselves to ignore that the mun is also autistic, which was the crux of Raven being a dick about it. This isn't fair to ND people, you're being ableist, it is my holy mission to decide who and what is ableist, broker no discussion from anyone that doesn't support my behavior, because I'm autistic and this upsets me personally. Probably because that mun doesn't repeatedly make it a big deal on their blog and on their every PSA. Making a not wild assumption there, since I don't either, and I was also an ableist swine for disagreeing. At the same time that I like myself too much, I hate ND people lol if you figure that one out, let me know.

That's been a lot of the issue here. Many if not most of the muns they ended up doing the most damage to are mentally ill, autistic, chronically ill, and so on. It was fully irrelevant to Raven and Co, despite all of them espousing that we never know what is going on in the lives of others.

That's why we really need to just feel whatever we're feeling and not interact instead of going on a crusade.

As you said, this RPer's mutuals, writing partners, and friends were all quite aware of their rules. Those rules have existed for the better part of four or five years as they are today, the people who have chosen to interact are on the same page with them, and it must be working out well. After all, Rules Mun was so deep in enjoying their hobby that it took a random, concerned, good resource/help blog they reblog from often telling them that their rules were being drug around the RPC quite a bit after the fact for them to know. I'd say that would probably mean their interactions and friendships weren't exactly negatively impacted by their tone.

And those people, as well as former writing partners and mutuals-in-law very much did know it was that mun's rules, yeah. You really have shot yourself in the foot when RPers with some animosity between each other take issue with what you've done to one of them, and that did actually happen as well. People knew.

Furthermore, since that mun didn't know for some time, even if they had been inclined to change the rules to appear like it wasn't them for the sake of anonymity, it wouldn't have been hard to find them. It was still identical to how it appeared Raven's posts (yes, posts, multiple), the mun was already getting shit for their PSA from the same group, and like everyone else, has an identifiable pattern in their OOC speech. They were quite identifiable.

In no way was not just dropping the URL doing anyone any favors. It was just keeping that mun from going directly to Raven and being the polar opposite of myself in the way I tried to address it. Like everything else, it was Raven insulating Raven while trying to incite bullying and bullshit.

Sadly, I agree with you on the meme/resource blogs. I can think of such a small handful of them that I feel are trustworthy adults not interested in stirring up trouble. I'd love to recommend them, but at this point, I'm really afraid of mentioning anyone directly in a positive way. I would feel so horrible if I said, "hey, everyone, the following meme muns are helpful, have a great reputation, and are very nice people, please give them a follow if you haven't already" and it ended up in them losing followers or gaining harassment because I said it.

I don't reblog many memes because that isn't my primary function here, but when I do find those that I feel are very unique, helpful to muse development, and so on, I don't reblog from sources that give me red flags. So, that's probably a good clue!

I'm just sorry this is such an environment of mistrust and bad will, it so easily can be otherwise by doing precisely as you've said. We've all a right to having issues with things, we even have the right to argue with each other, but we don't have the right to turn it into bullying and mob rule. When you have a blog that isn't your more private space of a RP blog, you're taking on a responsibility to be a bit better than giving in to our actual worst inclinations. It's just even worse because this entire experience proves that there are far more RPers here who feel the way you do. It really is a comparative handful of muns out there pulling this kind of shit, but unfortunately, that's all it takes when they're engaging in full-time harassment campaigns and extremely loud about it.

Thanks for being one of the many adults here, Anon! I promise you're not as alone as it seems. We all just tend to be far quieter.

#vespertine #answered #anonymous #drama cw

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mazarinedrake · 5 years

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So I recently got back into Warhammer 40k, and have been doing what I always do when I get interested in big, decades-old canons with mountains of lore...First I spend 36 hours straight on tv tropes and the fandom wikis, and then I inflict my insomnia-gained knowledge on my closest friends via discord.

Gallus: Guilliman is the Hades of the primarchs

Gallus: the only one who knows what he's doing and therefore VIOLENTLY boring until he decides to do something trollish to a deserving party

This inevitably turns out to be the BEST possible decision I could have made.

Drake: a lot about the Imperium could be summed up as "but y tho" "cause HASHTAG AESTHETICS!!!!!" and then someone declares Exterminatus on your planet

Gallus: Techpriest: Whatcha got there? Cherub: A kNiFe! Techpriest: NO!

Gallus: roubotte has had 'y tho' distilled into it's purest emotional form and produced to such excess from the imperial shenanigans that it's replaced his blood and he now runs on pure incredulity

Roubotte, Banging a pair of baking sheets together over Lion: WAKE UP MOTHER FUCKER i'M NOT DEALING WITH THEM ALL BY MYSELF.

Gallus: Im writing Roubotte and Lion as having like something approaching normal brother dynamics in spite of everything because it confuses the living shit out of everyone else

but them just Ye Ancient memes (T-Posing at each other for mock dominance) random bouts of cain instinct, resulting in one just. Slapping the shit out of the other with a holy reliquary or something, just for shits teaming up to back eachother up on random shit before going back to trying to nurple eachother

Lion, leaning over Roubotte: bothering roubotte just to annoy him

Roubotte; Go be a furry somewhere else.

some imperial carndinal or whatever in the room: ...go be a wHAT?

Drake: the Imperium Secundus is hilarious though

Roboute, Lion, and Sanguinius are in ultramar when they get a bunch of garbled messages that Horus has gone totally off his rocker and declared war against dad, everything's on fire and everyone's screaming, and then

they lose contact

with Terra

and get stuck on the wrong side of a huge warp storm

so Roboute decides that the only sensible thing to do in this situation is declare a new empire and make Sanguinius the Emperor

Gallus: ...In that scenario, assuming earth is gone is not unreasobable

Gallus: Drake

Drake being the emperor is MORE WORK

and he has so much already

also everyone already loves Sangria

from an admin standpoint this is AMAZING marketing that will save him many headaches later

Gallus: maybe they rock-paper-scissored for it and sanguinus lost

Drake: intentionally or not Lion is AUTISTIC AS HELL

Gallus: what I'm hearing tho is that Lion didn't trust himself to be Emperor and Roubotte didn't want to so they mutually bullied the most emotionally manipulatable sibling into it

Gallus: they're gonna steal Lion out of the monastery somehow

for some extremely stupid reason

possibly with the intent to Weekend At Bernies him for a bit

Until Lion actually wakes up while like

sitting at the breakfast table on The SpaceBoat Castle Fuck Mountain

it was the smell of bacon that got him

He's very confused also hungry

There's a Pigeon though they don't usually hang around danger

oh Dad there's the hangover

also: Roubotte and Lion causally referring to His Holiness The God Emperor as "Dad"

Drake: one of the first things Roboute did after waking up, in canon, was go to Terra and visit the throne room

nobody knows what happened in there but he emerged with new determination to fix all this bullshit

I mention this entirely so he can pull the "Dad said I'm in charge" card on Lion for petty bullshit

Gallus: Presumably he went in, saw the state of things, wne "FUUUUUUUUUCK" for like 2 hours then decided that since Sanguinus is dead HE has to be the respeonsible child now so GUESS IT'S UP TO HIM NOW

Lion: I want to listen to Space Celine Dion

Roboute: Well Dad said I'm in charge so we're listening to Space Kansas instead.

Gallus: [OC] has Chaotic Stepsibling Energy

Drake: But not Chaotic Chaotic because that would be bad

Gallus: troo

chaotic with the smol c

Drake: there we go

Drake: Chaos is why half the brothers are permanently uninvited from Family Game Night

yes that especially includes you Lorgar

you know what you did

Gallus: what did lorgar do

Drake: Everything.

Gallus: kinky

Drake: you know how some Christian rock music could be mistaken for gay love anthems if the names were changed?

Gallus: uh oh

Drake: now imagine if Jesus is standing right there on the stage and only likes you as a friend

Gallus: oh no

Drake: also he considers orbital bombardments a valid communication tool

Gallus: yeah this might inspire a mentally unbalanced superhuman do go do space murder heroin

Gallus: this whole thing reads like an unusally genocidical episode of Jerry Springer

#gallusrostromegalus #chat logs #warhammer 40k #primarchs #horus heresy

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incarnateirony · 4 years

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as of lately I’ve realized just how tired of fandom I am

don’t throw parties yet, people who hate how openly vocal I am. It just means I’m going to probably continue making commentary about the performative absurdity of fandom arguments that, were people not snugly secured hundreds of miles apart from each other behind glowing screens where they can infinitely obfuscate things with a winning circular argument, they would never have the audacity to try to pretend was logical without committing seppuku shortly after.

The latest smoking/shower/toilet thought:

I would hate to talk to most of these people in real life. Like to actually try to hold a conversation with them, even if I didn’t know they were X Fandomite, based purely on the way they hold discourse.

Because like, little thing about me. I’m autistic as fuck. I struggle with socializing and reading certain cues. But even I can objectively understand some shit people intentionally stay stupid to.

Now, I totally get like, revamping things a little bit for headcanons or fics or trying to make a more favorable interpretation that you enjoy. But generally, when I’m speaking about stuff, I’m talking about how people try to argue like they’re objectively speaking about canon while really making arguments that, were I forced to stare at someone through it in real life, I’d tune out the satire with a peanuts phone or the backdrop sound of a Giggle Stick or maybe a kazoo while my eyes glaze over waiting for them to stop doing the fandom equivalent of mansplaining shit in the opposite of common sense.

An example: People pretending they can’t tell the difference between characters taking action with intent, or people dropping witty one liners.

Whether you ship Destiel or not, listen. I don’t give a fuck what you ship, but you gotta acknowledge characters in the show rumor about it. Be that 14.01 Attached At The Everything. If you’re older than 9 you understand what the dude was implying. No, the “subtext” doesn’t leave room to interpret that angels have a secret Everything body part unique to them.

But there’s even others less about that. Like the time a fellow angel sneered at Castiel, bound in restraints, about his relationship with the Winchesters and dropped the blade to his groin. Someone out there once literally thought they were sounding any way logical going “It was just to annoy him!” Yeah, because that’s what people fucking do. Go around cutting off dude’s junk to ‘annoy them’ for no reason, and there’s no base context here that’s part of the canon about the religious zealotry whether or not it’s subtext or not. You can choose not to ship it and assume the angel is /wrong/ in this assumption. But at least try to sound half-sane in your excuses around it, because otherwise, you just sound desperate.

Like I’m not even kidding. It’s just sad at this point. If you have to act that oblivious to basic context while yelling “ALL INTERPRETATIONS ARE EQUAL” I’m going to prescribe you some basic human contact. With coronavirus a foot, skype calls will do. And if you know better and you’re disingenuously playing that oblivious that says a hell of a lot about what you /really/ think of the show content. If you would rather play Cirque du Soleil around common sense than simply jump to “well he’s probably WRONG” as your first answer, holy shit, is that a Freudian response, because odds are. You’re probably not thinking he’s wrong then, are you. And that my friend is a personal problem and one I don’t need to argue with.

On the other-other hand, people also completely missing context and characterization in the other direction as per convenience, and then choosing to take fallable dialogue as lawful decree. Like when characters are literally designed to be smug-ass motherfuckers dropping unwitty oneliners as a permanent nuisance villain building our ire just long enough that we’re there, energetically waiting for the time the motherfucker finally gets stabbed in the fucking FACE. Like somehow, people have been subject to so little-- not even books, books would help, but even TV, like they’ve lived under a rock and not watched another show in their life-- to read the basicness of it. But suddenly, common sense and context flies out the window because people who are lacking content want to contend with people and for some unearthly reason people humor their premise as part of serious discussion of the canon text.

Like, Zachariah comes to mind with that kind of example. His entire Being on the show was thinking he was a genius comedian with smug comments we’re literally designed to want to punch him in the face for over and over.

Some off the top of my head in rough-ish order-ish

"You should see my decoupage." "You're looking fit." "We want to keep you safe before showtime." "We'll throw in Mary Ann for free." "Quit hurling feces like a howler monkey, would you?" "Apocalypse is coming kiddo, to a theater near you." "The apocalypse? Poor name, bad marketing." "This isn't the first planetary enema." "Two virgins and seventy sluts." "President Palin defends bombing of houston, certainly a buyer's market in real estate. Let's see what's happening in sports!" "Wow! Running from angels. On foot! In heaven! With out of the box thinking like that I'm surprised you boys haven't stopped the apocalypse already!" "You can run, but you can't run!" "Let's brass tack this shall we?" "I see you and your brother share the same refined palate." "You are nothing but a maggot inside a worm's ass." "Who's been playing Back to the Future?"

Oh, but no, no! The SECOND this dirtbag makes some "erotically codependent" crack, people legit sit here arguing circles about this like that's some sort of textual fucking merit with any kind of *reasonable* interpretation much less jousting around in the canon arena like some kind of victors.

...

Can you IMAGINE someone staring you in the face and trying to argue that seriously while maintaining eye contact? Or pretending they can’t respectively tell what that means?

Again. Fine. Within your playspace in fandom, do whatever the hell you want. But I’m addressing the RIDICULOUS canon arguments.

And just as ridiculous as it is from one end, the utter inanity of people who CHOOSE TO ARGUE THIS SHIT IN A LOOP FOR SEVENTEEN YEARS.

I know AAD still floats around. I can’t count the number of times they’ve pointed out time and again these ancient arguments people use to shit on people’s shit, not even just in fanon but acting like they have room to argue shit in canon. What is it, the old necro arguments or vessel arguments? Jesus christ people. If you haven’t figured out how flat those are I can’t emphasize enough how little you know about this show in the scale of it. But equally Jesus Christ People, why does anyone argue with them at this point?

This can’t be a literal fandom where everyone’s more autistic and even less socially functional than I am. Like. What the fuck. Why do grown people act like this online. How can you not delete your accounts while pretending to understand so little about basic social function you’re trying to analyze in a show and argue with people about, like, honestly

Like I said: I would hate to talk to most of these people in real life.

On the other hand, I would love the chance. Please. Look me in the eye while you try to hold this discussion. I beg you.

Maybe that should be the new gauntlet. video call canon discussions where you have to maintain eye contact. All other debates or jousts about canon are irrelevant. Can we ban them? Just make people get on a skype call and see if they can maintain eye contact and keep their face on display without impulsively slamming ‘Log out’ realizing people are watching them say the shit they say.

#supernatural #spn #fandom

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shinneth · 5 years

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For the character thing - Connie & Peridot??

Ooooh, interesting pair of choices. Guaranteed variety, at least!

How I feel about this character

She is my spirit animal. No, really, it’s kind of bizarre that it took this long for me to discover how fantastic Peridot is; I dropped off watching SU when I axed my cable - back then it was still early season 1 before she debuted. So I didn’t acknowledge her until I finally caught up on the series around the beginning of this year and holy shit.

Peridot is immensely relatable as a character; she’s easily one of the most dynamic in the series and by far had the best, most engaging character arc. In a way, I almost feel she set the bar too high, since I haven’t really felt the characters who were redeemed after her really measured up in overall execution. Though Bismuth came close; she just didn’t have much time invested in her story. But hell, I could watch Peridot tell off Yellow Diamond over and over again…

Early on I saw the headcanons of Peridot being autistic - and being so myself, I could see why it’s a popular headcanon, but it made her even more of a character I could relate to. And while she was well-developed and generally had good screentime, there were so many ways I could interpret aspects of Peridot to further her development. There are still a slew of little details about Peridot (or are applicable to her) that aren’t explained very well (if at all). Which is why I dedicated nearly half a million words trying to solve those mysteries and to make Peridot even more amazing than she is already.

She’s generally a bright light among a bunch of sadsacks in the show - and even when Peridot does have her down moments, they’re completely understandable. Overall, Peridot’s just a delight to see, and her very presence inspires me in ways I’ve never before thought I’d experience. She’s got a steady place in my standing of my top favorite characters of all-time.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

STEVEN.Steven Steven Steven–aah, alternatively, I’m fine shipping Peridot with Spinel, Bismuth, Garnet, Ruby, Sapphire, and Pearl. While I don’t ship Jaspidot, I can easily see that in a one-sided sense where no actual love is in the equation.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

Tempting as it is to cheat and just say platonic Stevidot and call it a day, I’ll go with a platonic OTP with someone I absolutely don’t ship with Peridot any other way… I think by default, it’s with Amethyst. I’ve always been perfectly fine keeping platonic Amedot just as that. Though due to my writing, I’ve also come to really enjoy the platonic nature of Greg and Peridot as well.

My unpopular opinion about this character

Peridot was much better as a character before she became Lapis’ roommate. I’ve always felt this role actually made Peridot regress as a character in some ways (but not entirely - just enough for me to notice and be annoyed by it). Also, Peridot should be leading her own division of the Crystal Gems. :P

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon

pppffffff only one, you say?!

Well, there’s a hell of a lot to choose from… let’s just say I wish Peridot wasn’t totally pushed off to the side once the Rose Quartz=Pink Diamond stuff came about. I wrote a whole story on that. Honestly, I wished Peridot had more of a general presence after she moved back in to the bathroom…

How I feel about this character

The thing that comes to mind is wasted potential, sadly. Connie was far more likable in the earlier seasons, but she went downhill for me after taking up the sword.

Nowadays, I find her to be pretty damn boring as a character. And her actions in the later seasons really damaged her in ways I’m not sure can be fully repaired. More than anything, now, I feel little more than a sense of dread with Connie because it’s looking more and more like they’ll go the most bland, predictable route with her character in the future… which will just make me dislike her that much more.

And the fanbase overblowing her as a character (plus a certain ship) tends to make me feel even more negatively inclined towards her; it just bothers me that the sheer mediocrity of Connie’s character is something that’s so celebrated.

I have tried in earnest to at least make her more palatable while writing Connie, and I do have at least a few ideas that might actually make her more enjoyable and more engaging as a character, but that’s still just headcanon. At best, I like to see Connie paralleled with Pearl - following in her footsteps too literally. That’s an area that could be explored more that would simultaneously make Connie more interesting and a tolerable (possibly even likable for me) character.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Pearl. And… that’s it, really. I guess it could potentially be interesting to ship her with that boy she accidentally kicked the ass of in school, but honestly, Pearl’s the only one I really want to see Connie with. If not, I’d be A-OK making her realize down the road that she doesn’t really feel the need to be romantically involved with anyone at all. Maybe Connie grows up to have aspirations so big that she doesn’t have time to even think about romance, let alone want it. I’d be fine with that.

… is it weird that my headcanons for Connie are basically what a lot of people have for Peridot?

My non-romantic OTP for this character

Ergh… canon really soured Connverse even as a platonic ship during the last season, but realistically, there’s little else to choose from. Well, I do really like the concept of Connie and Peridot getting along really well and geeking out together. I have a foundation for that set in my screwy universe, at least…

But sure, in a general sense, we’ll just go with Steven here. :P Jam buds stay as jam buds!

My unpopular opinion about this character

Connie is not fascinating or interesting on her own merit, and she is not meant to be with Steven. The worst thing the show could do is have Connie and Steven get married and have kids. Don’t even imply it. That’s a shitty fate to subject both of them to.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon

Connie being overwhelmed with so many lofty life goals she wants to have but has trouble deciding not only what really big career to aspire for, but also her conflicting schedule that would come with being a full-time Crystal Gem if she also fancies making that a lifelong pursuit… then contemplate whether or not she can handle an unstable and unpredictable life opposed to a grounded and more productive career where she’s fully in control of doing what she’s always wanted to do.

Hope those were satisfactory answers! Meme in question is here if anyone else wants to throw other characters at me. :D

#meme #answered asks #pikablob #steven universe #peridot #su peridot #connie maheswaran #character analysis #in which i reveal #my disturbing level of love for peridot #and my pessimistic indifference towards connie

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strechanadi · 5 years

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Swan Lake Wolfgang/Siegfried overthinking no. I-refuse-to-count-how-many-times-this-stupid-ballet-and-this-even-more-stupid-characters-did-not-let-me-sleep!

Dear @spinmelikeyoumeanit ... this is yet again yours and yours fault only.

(And yes, once I start I physically cannot stop myself, which leads to... err. THIS!)

(I sincerely apologize. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Truly.)

Well, I promised, didn’t I? And it literally took me just about a lifetime! (On the other hand – academic life happened. Don’t do postgrad, kids, it’s just not worth it…) (Or maybe just dont try to write a dissertation in a MONTH! FFS!)

One would think I would be over it. That after so many Swan Lakes nothing would have the ability to shake me. That after so many sleepless nights spent thinking over every little think here and there, I would know almost everything, therefore would be prepared for anything thrown at me. And yet here we are! Once again, blown away by Swan Lake of all ballets. I mean… could there be anything more cliché?

However, I already made peace with one thing (and you should probably too, saves lives and all that) and that’s the genius of Nureyev, of his Swan Lake and of the duality of Wolfgang/Rothbart.

As many of you remember, I’m sure (and slightly horrified), even recording of Nureyev’s SL is more than able to put me out of service, to prevent me from living what even the tiniest group of people would call a normal life. Or something. So, what the hell was I thinking when buying the ticket to see the ballet in question live, I have literally no idea. (Well. I have, actually. He may even have a name…) But yes, I did saw Swan Lake with POB live on stage. From the first fucking row, because that’s how extra I have to be. (Yes, my diet consists solely of bread and water since… seems like forever now.) I saw it, I died and that’s about it. However, my being dead is not something anyone would be particularly interested in, so let’s just move to the only thing you (the whole lot of exactly one person) are here for.

I did write a review on said performance. And usually I’m trying to translate them (even though I’m not exactly sure why, because it causes me almost physical pain and at the end I feel endlessly stupid, since I have to search every second word in dictionary, which is slightly pathetic, also I love my Czech sentences too much and with my pitiful knowledge of English I simply cannot make them justice, so they look utterly weird in the end and they deserve better than that), however unlike with my first POB SL review 3 years back this time I’ve decided to just don’t give a shit and dive into the story head first consequences be damned, so I think with writing this thing here I would have everything important covered (i.e. no need for the actual review) (the first half was basically just me showing off my endless knowledge on SL music score, which is plain boring, let’s be real, plus I wrote all that in my first review).

/AN - This is actually longer than the review itself. I think I feel a little bit sick…/

So. Right. Swan Lake.

I’m not gonna pretend there’s anyone else in whom I am more interested than Siegfried. And it’s not just because Nureyev made him a main character of the story. It’s because it makes sense. Who is on stage from start to finish? Through whose eyes we are watching the whole story? We should be able to sympathize with Siegfried, we should be able to see his point, to understand him, to get what he’s doing and why – sort of at least. And that’s probably why I am so annoyed with traditional SLs where it mostly looks like the choreographers/dancers/ballet masters/whoever don’t even try and go with some bland hero, because whatever, we are all waiting for the 2nd act and the Swan anyway.

So, it’s clear I love Nureyev’s story with passion (you wouldn’t tell, would you!) and the moment the curtain raises I’m drawn to Siegfried no matter who’s the dancer. And, OK, if it’s Mathieu Ganio, I’m kind of helpless, I admit (it would be cute, I guess, were I not be way over 13 yo).

I will try to stay as reasonable as I could and not to embarrass myself. Too much. So I would not write about the stupid little things that nobody in their right mind would (or could!) notice (or at least not at the first sight), because, dear god, literally no one gives a damn about the way his fingers twitched during his Prologue‘s nightmare in perfect synchrony with the music and action on stage… Can I get to the point?! Preferably on this day!

Normal person would be probably unable to talk about Siegfried without Odette/Odile. But I think we have already established I’m by no means a normal person. So, I am not able to talk about Siegfried without Wolfgang. (Yes, we are finally getting somewhere!)

I love their relationship in any shape and form and I would gladly watch every single cast and every possible combination of dancers in those two roles as I’m sure each time I would get something new (you cannot stop my brain, believe me, I tried). There was the oddly depending, blurred, yet intense José/Karl take. The terrifyingly creepy, what-the-fuck-happened-or-is-still-happening-behind-the-close-doors Mathieu/Francois one (that still makes my hair stand whenever I think about it, because… holy shit, that one moment between 1st and 2nd act!). The clueless puppy/slightly perverted, obsessed mastermind vibes from Germain/Francois. So what about Mathieu/Jérémy this time, hm?

/AN – I’m gonna probably end up mixing dancers‘ names with their characters‘, so… Yeah. I have no excuses, it’s just going to happen anyway, no matter how hard I would try to prevent it./

It was clear from the very first moment, Siegfried was much more mature this time, much more the young adult than barely 18yo adolescent. He looked reasonably confident, sure of himself, a true aristocrat, a crown prince ready to be a king (almost to the point where I was thinking – oh, where’s my lost, Asperger’s child? I want my lost, Asperger’s child! Spoiler alert – I got my lost, Asperger’s child eventually, do not worry. Just wait for it). However, watching him during the opening dance scene it was becoming more and more clear everything’s not so smooth as it may seem. He grew impatient, the whole situation slowly but surely becoming unbearable, and he was fighting against it with all he had, trying to stay calm, trying to play the role he was expecting to, his nervous, involuntary fingers tapping against his throne the only thing out of place. But there was always Wolfgang for him in those moments. Wolfgang, who was the constant, never-changing presence. Wolfgang, who could be standing on the other side of the room and the connection between him and his prince almost palpable, magnetic, electrifying. Always there. Always sure.

They look like best friends, no matter their different social status. Wolfgang casually showing Siegfried one girl or another (funny how he didn’t need to bring Siegfried’s attention to men, since he was happily watching them on his own accord), whispering something to his ear (A court rumour? An inside joke? A reassurance to keep Siegfried in his right mind?), hand casually on his shoulder. When they were walking together, Wolfgang was positively hugging Siegfried with his arm around prince’s shoulders. And then you saw him standing side stage, watching Siegfried being crowned, watching him dance, watching his inner struggle started by queen’s mention of marriage, watching him trying to act all casual and „oh, it’s nothing, I’m all right“ while knowing his autism and insecurities and all the good stuff is kicking, trying to break free and took over his mind and soul again. Because Siegfried may be more in charge now, but once autistic, always autistic… The mental issues were there. Waiting. As well as Wolfgang. Watching, waiting, calculating, manipulating without anybody knowing, using the Machiavellianism to the point.

And I wanted to scream, because hell, Siegfried, you look like a reasonable, mature human being. You are not the lost child with puppy eyes, you have to know something’s off! Tell me, what do you know! But then they were together and it was painfully clear he simply believed they were at the same page, he had no reason not to think so, they were in this together. Take the moment at the end of the „dance lesson.“ José himself leant towards Karl, believing him implicitly, automatically, without question and on top of that he actually looked him in the eye, and there was the brilliant moment where Karl looked away like – “oh no, stop, this is too much, that’s not right” and also “I’m not affected by this at all.” Francois just grabbed Mathieu’s arm and pulled. The gesture strong, harsh, leaving no doubts and literally no space between the two of them, because “oh no no, my prince, you have no personal space, no free will, I am the one who will tell you what to do, I am the one in charge, don’t forget that, I certainly not let you forget, ever.” With Mathieu and Jérémy the movement towards each other was mutual. Mathieu leaned back, Jérémy went slightly forward whispering into his ear.

However just a few seconds earlier, during the actual dance lesson, was a moment that couldn’t be more out of the realm of things OK even if it tried. I remember someone did something similar in one of the older videos I saw through the years of my healthy social life, I, however, do not remember it being quite like this time. I’m talking about the moment nearly at the end with Siegfried kneeling on the floor with Wolfgang walking around him. Some Wolfgangs simply put their hand on prince’s shoulder and squeeze, some let their hand stay there for a bit (too) long, some doesn’t touch Siegfried at all for one reason or another. And then came Jérémy. He did touch Mathieu’s shoulder. Let his hand there. Heavy, grounding. And then, slowly, intentionally, almost proprietary traced his chest from one collar bone to the other. Touching the bare skin. Not in some delicate, subtle, almost-not-there motion with fingertips barely touching. This was open. Possessive. Claiming. I inhaled so sharply people on the balcony must have heard it. I almost gave myself a brain concussion. Or got high on oxygen overdose. Or something. Being at home alone (or maybe even with my family around) I would be screaming myself hoarse and/or swearing profusely. But since I was sitting in a theatre with 2,5 thousands other people completely clueless of my inner battle, I had to… just keep breathing and acting cool. Not that I was particularly successful or anything.

How the 1st Act was going, it was more and more clear Siegfried depended on Wolfgang. And what was even more painful, it was his own decision. Surely, he was manipulated into it to some extent and at some point, but with this prince I believe if one asked him, he would say he believes Wolfgang. “Because he’s a friend. Because he’s helping. He’s good. Stop asking stupid questions, I’m not an idiot!” You had to admit this Wolfgang did a fucking good job without actually showing it (and showing off, looking at you, Francois). Because at the end of Act 1 all he had to do to stop Siegfried from following the running boys was turn his head. He didn’t step to stay in his way, he didn’t cross his arms or shake his head disapprovingly. He just stood there, then looked slightly over his shoulder and Siegfried stopped. Like that. And then, just before he was about to start his andante sostenuto variation (during which I most definitely died, because there was simply no other option, since this monster of a man, while doing his manege of jetés entrelacé, decided to turn the palm of his front arm up to make the landing pose in arabesque a cry, with his arm desperately reaching towards something, to fill every fucking detail of his movement with intention and meaning and who the hell asked this from you?! I can scarcely cope even while you are just dancing and feeling the music in ways that are too close to mine, could you please tell me, why you had to even do THIS to me?! Am I not dead enough?), he looked back at Wolfgang. Like if I could forget about their connection…!

But what was between the two of them exactly? I don’t have a clue. I know what I see in José/Karl interpretation. I know how I understand Mathieu/Francois relationship (because I am a bad person, my mind is poisoned and my brain is sick!). But Mathieu/Jérémy? There’s so much going on but I for the love of all that is holy cannot put a finger on it. (And that’s probably one of the reasons I almost went to the stage door to tell them I love them. I didn’t. I am an adult. I do not fangirl. I just go home and deal with all the feelings like the emotionally repressed person I am. I would make an excellent posh Englishman.) Let’s just say it was for the first time that Wolfgang was taller than Siegfried. Significantly taller. So whenever Siegfried wanted to looked him in the eyes, he had to look UP. And this stupid, tiny, little detail made me feel so many things, it’s not even funny anymore (which falsely indicated it WAS funny once, which most definitely was NOT). But just imagine the Siegfried/Wolfgang duet between act 1 and 2 with Siegfried coming to Wolfgang, to looking up to his eyes, and try not to see the vulnerability in it. Try not to see all the cards changing. Because it should have been Siegfried over Wolfgang because of their social status. During act one they were at the same level – because Siegfried wanted so. And now, suddenly, it was Wolfgang over Siegfried. And when he put the prince on the ground in the end, Siegfried looked yet again completely lost, devastated and abused… You just didn’t know how exactly this time. Or you did, but it was still just a wild guess, you couldn’t be completely, absolutely, 100% sure.

What was sure – Siegfried was broken. He took the offered crossbow as if not knowing what he is doing, as if not knowing it’s his hands that is holding it. And then he stood up, turned and wanted to go to Wolfgang, because obviously. He made two steps, and Wolfgang was just standing there, centre stage, looking (not with the arms dismissively crossed as Francois, mind you) and Siegfried stopped, tripped over his feet, looked and promptly turned back. And there was something so unbelievably hurt in him. Because he knew what the crossbow means, figuratively. And that’s what hurt him most. Seeing Wolfgang with it. Seeing Wolfgang pushing him towards the edge, knowing he’s helpless, knowing that it would be him who would jump, he himself, nobody would actually push him, just bring him so near the edge, there would be no other choice. It was like an accusation. Because “I believed you. I trusted you. I thought we were friends. I thought you would help me. And you pushed me back towards my illness, pushed me into those dreams that we both know will be the end of me.” You could almost touch the moment, the last flicker of consciousness, the hurt creeping from the deep of Siegfried’s soul but it was too late already. It was late the moment he took the crossbow. And you were watching him losing the somewhat sane part of his mind, the part that knows, and falling to his dreams, to his forbidden world. Because giving the poor Asperger’s little prince a bit of schizophrenia is a way to go. Hello, this is me, nice to meet you.

Yes, partly this whole mess of a situation was the Queen’s fault. Her mentioning marriage and crowning and you know, the adult stuff, made Siegfried quiver in his so painfully hard-won stable mental state of sorts, that seemed more stable than in other SLs, but was still too fragile. But Wolfgang was the one who made it happened, who was the vital help, who was the final cause. Because who else could have been more successful? Who would have been better for such job? Who could have managed such thing if not him…?

I’ll give you a break and am gonna talk about 3rd act for a bit. Because Mathieu Ganio’s Siegfried in act 3 is a fucking piece of art and someone give the man an award for it!

There was an achingly apparent difference between Act 1 Siegfried and Act 3 Siegfried. While during the 1st Act he was able to hold himself together to the point one would not tell he had any mental issues, in 3rd Act he was loosing his contact with reality from the start. And of course he was, with no Wolfgang behind his back whispering to his ear, keeping him in check, distracting him while things become too tedious and tiring, calming him by his mere presence. So his standing up and leaving the stage during character dances made so much sense. He refused the princesses with pleasure and right then he threw everything, his control, his mind, his consciousness out of window, and just jumped, leaving his illness in charge and Odile with Rothbart appeared. And if Odette and the lake was a dream, this was much more a fantasy. I’m going to repeat myself, but I stop when there would be more than one Siegfried like this in 3rd Act. Because this Siegfried was not dragged across stage by Odile, he was not simply following her with heart eyes, smiling and thinking rather stupidly she’s Odette, the pure, fragile girl from the lake even though she’s acting almost completely different. This Siegfried was confident, self-assured, constantly trying to convince Odile of his power and to prove himself. He grew impatient with her constant escaping, there was anger and sharpness in some of his movements. We all know the moment when Siegfried is standing behind Odile and she’s taking his arms to hug herself, right? So Mathieu Ganio leaned in and kissed. Her. On. The. Neck.

(I let that information sink.) (And while it would be sinking, I take a little walk to ease some of the tension and calm my inner voice that is screaming profanities, cause HOLYFUCKINGSHIT, can you imagine the dreamy, pure, innocent prince from previous act to do such thing?!)

I would also like to mention the black adagio. You know, the one where Siegfried is supposed to be fascinated by Odile who is seducing him? The one, during which this time was not quite clear if the prince was watching the enchanting black swan or Rothbart with the same intent, with the same intensity in his eyes and tension between the two of them…? Yeah.

(Also – Jérémy before his Rothbart variation, sitting on Siegfried’s throne like it belongs to him. Good grief!)

The end of act 3 wasn’t as much of a mad scene as it was in 2016. However Siegfried fell down on the floor completely unceremoniously, lying on his back and while the curtain opened and we were in the 4th Act he lied there in the exact same position and it looked almost like he’s in his bed. Like he completely lost it during the ball (and lost it he did) and was escorted to his chambers, put to his bed and now his poor, tortured mind sent him yet again to the woods, to the lake side.

Odette in act 2 was a complete figment of Siegfried’s imagination, appearing suddenly from nowhere, made from thin air, sharing Siegfried’s pain and deep grief. (Yes, even in act 2, because this time there were no heartfelt love confessions, no big romance, no sunny smiles and promises of happily ever after. But there was a bond. Strong and deeply felt.) In 4th Act she was resigned. She knew she’s about to die and there’s nothing she could do about it. Because Odette is Siegfried. In this performance and interpretation more than ever. She was his innocence that was somehow betrayed and violated by the act 3 fantasy. She was his integral part, she was his childhood, she was his hope, she was the last piece of his sanity, she was him. And Siegfried came to her guiltily, ashamed of himself, afraid to look herself in the eyes and see what became of him. Because he was dying. And he knew it.

And then Rothbart appeared and took Odette from Siegfried. Took his hope, his mind, his soul - like the mental illnesses, Siegfried’s ultimate bane and his final doom. And then came the last moment. When Siegfried turned around and there, in the middle of the mists stood someone. With arm held forward, palm up as in an invitation. And then… magnificent, ethereal Wolfgang spread his arms wide. Opened them for his prince, to let him jump into. And Siegfried run and jumped with his last breath and last desperate cry of arched back to the arms of death. That is nor evil, nor kind. That simply is.

And it makes you wonder – what if this was in the end the best option for Siegfried after all? What if Wolfgang was doing what he was doing having his prince’s good in mind? Was it something he himself believed in? That he was helping? Or was it just something he would say, if anybody asked? And was he ever even real?

Hello. This is Nureyev’s Swan Lake for you. Causes many questions. Answers none. Gives you bunch of other instead.

Please, do feel free to tell me I should find a professional help.

#ballet #swan lake #le lac des cygnes #this is just me #not being able to shut up #and get over wolfgang and siegfried #for nearly 4000 words #it's not healthy #but whatever #wolfgang #siegfried #rothbart #overthinking #like a pro #make it an olympic sport #thank you #LOOK IT'S ALMOST 4 IN THE MORNING!

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stimmypaw · 3 years

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stimmypaw reads Shattered Sky, a late tumblr post

I just, forgot to post this for some reason. It’s me writing my thoughts on the third book of A Vision Of Shadows, I also did that with the first and second ones! Very full of spoilers, enjoy!

Omg.....meet Darktail's Kinnies... someone should name their wc kin server that its a great name, most of them seem to have wc names tho I thought he was a whole gang?? Did more of them get wc names or have already than we knew???

Oh no I barely got to see echosong :c I hope the others are okay, frecklewish is a wonderful name

Chapter one they already have all of the clans going 2 fight???? This absolutely won't go well and that terrifies me

Onestar realized Darktail has a beautiful voice :/ and he feels bad battling him /j

Yup just as I expected, awful loss. Plus Twigpaw was sure her sister was gonna kill her which killed Me

Alderheart parent mode

YASSSS ITS TIME FOR SKYCLAAANNNNNN

obviously the clans are pissed why the hell did they have this as a secret bro!!! why?? bramblestar was just ashamed now firestar???? bro WHY i seriously need to read firestar’s quest I just don’t get it

scenes of elders being cared for by apprentices is always so comforting, seeing it being interrupted and taken from violetpaw feels awful

WHO THE FUCK IS THISTLE he isn’t in the allegiances??????????????????? HELLO ah okay the rogues are showing up slowly ok

Violetpaw did a u-turn to her character here it seems?? She didn't find the elders were lecturing her at first, was Darktail's lil speech about how she was brave enough to convince her they are wrong??? A few compliments couldn't possibly be enough for that. Plus again she is seeing Darktail brutally murder someone and how despite seemingly treating each other nicely these cats are ready to betray each other anytime. Surely this would be enough for her to feel like the elders are still right and she can't trust these cats???

Hope she doesn't start seeing this violence as normal

I'm so sorry for blossomfall I can't believe she got with thornclaw of all cats

LIONBLAZE JAYFEATHER CINDERHEART AND TAWNYPELT, ALL JUST CASUALLY LISTENING TO GOSSIP. ABSOLUTELY SCANDALOUS I LOVE THEM

I love like how the book will take breaks every now and then to show for a millisecond ivypool being mad at tigerheart or vice versa and dovewing looking at tigerheart or vice versa and have the POV go "wonder what thats all about" and just proceed with the plot. Wonderful

Twigpaw :c

"A "mrrow" of welcome" has got to be my favorite line on this book

The cats complain there's already enough plots going on.

Whitewing is a very nice background cat and I appreciate her. But God Omen of the Stars only proved Starclan is just a bunch of old dead cats and that can be both good and terrible. Her argument is needed tho.

The others have a point tho, how can they leave the clan with less cats right now? I guess they would come back with more but what if they're not strong enough to defend themselves? A lot of trouble could happen with Skyclan coming as is to the territories and its understandable for the cats to be concerned

Violetpaw and Needletail cope with trauma as best they can and thats not a lot

I hope Violetpaw at least realizes how fucked up it is that they are scared of their leader who is supposedly their kin and the one who they should be the most loyal to

Oh Boy kittypets!

I love kittypets so much they're always fun. Darktail is so creepy tho I read some quotes he said to my girlfriend and she said he sounded like GLaDOS and yeah he's creepy I can feel it without Violetpaw agreeing with me that she's scared of what will happen next. Where did Darktail get that blood thing????

I like Zelda. She seems to be Violetpaw's age I hope she is so they can kiss. ALSO THIS IS KINDA LIKE MENTORING??? Violetpaw should get a warrior name

TWIGPAW PUT A PILLOW UNDER HER BLANKET SO NO ONE WOULD NOTICE SHE LEFT AHAHAHHA I bet she went to find Skyclan didn't she

PURDY

NOOOOOOO PURDYYY NOOOOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

my gf said indigestion can sometimes have those effects on a cat if its really bad i didn't know that

PURDY CANT BE GONE PLEAS

I am SO sad I knew this was coming and I hated it terrible awful

I never saw a vigil so sweet. We Are All Love Purdy.

OH RIGHT TWIGPAW GSGWHAHAH

I appreciate no one is annoyed or pissed theyre all just worried, I am too

Apparently Alderheart and Bramblestar disagree lot? They seem to get along great though. And uh I guess Bramblestar doesn't always take his advice but, that doesn't mean much they like talk about stuff and Bramblestar forms conclusions taking in consideration the stuff his son said and all. Idk, feels like a weird statement Twigpaw something tells me the Erins are failing to send a message somewhere

Fuck I hope someone finds twigpaw soon, her adventure has been fun but I'm terrified for her

Violetpaw seems to be having a hard time too, not only is everything awful and terrible plus we had a time skip of a few days so who knows what happened to Twigpaw. Anyways Violetpaw having to care for Needletail like a mentor is like a young teen having to care for a young adult's mental health and that always sucks for the kid, there's not much else that can be done though Needletail probably doesn't want to worry

Violetpaw :C

This is so sad and terrible, I wish Violetpaw could be with Twigpaw right now she wouldn't be starclan knows where if they were just together!!! I hope the other cats don't start saying nonsense about Violetpaw now. She's scared she won't be accepted in Thunderclan and doesn't see herself as worthy of acceptance, and feels responsible for her older friend. I'm :CC

PAGGDHAHAHA Zelda is a trash cat and I love her

Violetpaw is suffering so much and Darktail is absolutely brainwashing her ass and she can't understand how he is to blame for everything.

Oh boy when she does.

This is such a good story God im like very tired and in need of sleep but I can't stop reading

Oh God so much has happened, this is so terrible, I love that Mothwing and Alderheart are hanging out tho I forgot what a fun character she can be!!!

Thinking about how so much would be easier since book 1 if Onestar agreed to lend a helping paw. Thinking about the begging dying bodies piling up at his door. Thinking about onestar.

Oh scratch what I said earlier guys WHEN VIOLETPAW FINDS OUT DARKTAIL KILLED DAWNPELT OH BOY

Its terrible knowing dawnpelt isn't there and like, so far thinking she was in thunderclan, only to have thunderclan cats wonder if she's in shadowclan like oh God oh fuckle this is IT

I feel so bad for Loki and Zelda :c I would give them treats

What the fuck Darktail

Holy shit Darktail

I am noticing like, cats making seriously spot on assumptions of things that happened out of small information and idk if that really isn't realistic and just a way to make cats realize things or if I'm just too autistic to relate

I'm so glad the medicine cats treat anxiety. Last time I remember that happening was the prophecy begins but I might be forgetting somethin

The fear these cats have of the clans ending feels so real I am absolutely terrified for them and I love it

It doesn't make sense for twigpaw 2 die so I'm not buying it but wow this hurts

Violetpaw time

I am itching for them to find skyclan so bad

Violetpaw you're not Squirrelpaw or Leafpaw in the new prophecy you wouldn't have felt if Twigpaw died :P

Bro Needletail :c I miss when she was a wild free creature

This prisoner smuggling deal is so fun I am absolutely excited about everyone's plans, it can't all go well so soon though.

TWIGPAW YESSSS BABY I MISSED YOU

Twigpaw lactose intolerant moment

omg she had a vision

Vision cat be nice 2 my baby she is dying

TWIGPAW FOUND SKYCLAN YESSSS YES YES YES

OMG......HAWKWING.....AAAAAAA THATS HER DAD BRO SHE FOUND HER DAD IM YESSSS YEAYESYESYEYD

This is so good im so happy

This is so awful I'm so sad WHERES THE CLAN CATS they were supposed to show up when they were asleep right????? Fuck!!!

This is so scary

NEEDWETAIL IM

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Violetpaw definitely could have used a better friend at times, but God was Needletail good im so sad

Bramblestar: alderheart we need a point of view from thunderclan of what's happening so you're coming to the battle

OMG THEY DID IT!!!! I DID NOT EXPECT THAT WROW VERY NICE

Oh this is so exciting, how will they get Windclan back????

Twigpaw baby you always had your place here

I think they should both go to Skyclan but I understand if Twigpaw is indecisive she has always had a good life in Thunderclan.

Nononono Rowanstar, Scourge is the villain from the The Prophecy Begins here, your guy is named Darktail

Ominousnestar

I have been vaguely spoiled about Onestar being related to Darktail but I have no clue how

I can see Onestar's, Smoke's and Darktail's designs rotating in my mind its beautiful

I'm loving this story this is so cool

You dare challenge the warrior cats Fandom?

SKYCLAN, DROP YOUR CATS

RIVERCLAN, GET THE BUCKET

WINDCLAN, GRAB YOUR LEAFBLOWERS

THUNDERCLAN, GRAB YOUR LIGHTNING RODS

SHADOWCLAN, IDK MAN SAY BOO OR SOMETHING AHHAHA

I'm glad this is the prophecy this series really is Tumblr vs 4chan

Oh my god

This is so surreal

What an astounding battle wow and what an ending

I loved it

That was so so good

Everything here was fantastic, looking back its hard to believe they managed to fit so much plot into one book and like the pacing was Very Good this was just good writing wow? The development of Darktail, everything with Onestar, very fun I was on the edge of my seat through the whole thing it was incredibly fun. I’m very excited for what’s to come too, I worry it probably won’t be as fun and exciting as this since they already got rid of the biggest threat, unless they get another, but still like I really wanna know what’s gonna happen with Skyclan! And Violetpaw and Twigpaw!!!! How will the clans cope with all this loss and receive a new clan in the territories??? There’s a lot of good build up that I don’t know if it will live up to all that happened so far, but I think it can be very good and I’m excited, lots ahead of us!!! Oh boy!!

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aro-as-in-straight-as-a · 4 years

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Personal Thoughts on She-Ra

-I would die for Scorpia (hot butch lesbian rights!)

-Entrapta! Said! Autistic! Rights! (also i love her)

-Adora is the most Jockish Jock to ever Jock

-Entrapta x Hordak, the ship i never thought i’d love

-Netossa x Spinerella! Sweet battle wives!

-Mostly ladies in the cast? Hell yeah

-I know nonbinary people being shapeshifters is kind of a stereotype but imma be honest i love Double Trouble, the bastard

-Bow is the voice of reason and the others do not deserve him

-Swift Wind is utterly fantastic

-Wrong Hordak is so great! So little screen time and so much character development!

-Hordak, despite being a bastard, is the first reasonably competent villain i have ever seen. Holy shit. Man is there to Get Shit Done, and i gotta respect that

-Frosta impressed me at first, then acted exactly like every 12 y/o i’ve ever seen. So, realistic, but pretty annoying.

-Glimmer...she’s...grown. Same with Catra.

-(I’ll give Catra this, she went from annoyingly repressed and self destructive to reasonably apologetic. Glimmer matured but pretty much stayed the same person so idk)

-Bow’s dads are HOT. HOT DAMN.

-Huntara ALSO said hot butch lesbian rights but she and Scorpia are on opposite ends of the spectrum. A variety in butches! Hallelujah!

-Perfuma is the most realistic Positive Person i’ve ever met, and her vendetta against cacti is so hilarious

-Also, Micah is hot (what is it with hot dads in this show? I’m into it but man they went all out on the DILF content)

-Scorpia x Perfuma? They get to just utterly smother each other in affection and affirmation, and after all of the shit they’ve gone through they deserve it.

-(Catra and Mermista both said tsundere rights huh)

-Shadow Weaver is such an interesting character

-Bow and Glimmer’s “ily” was entirely platonic and that is a hill i will die on

-Madam Razz! Invite me over ma’am i’ll help you bake a pie (no that is not a euphemism)

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winterywitch · 7 years

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anyway heres a summary of my discourse beliefves:

cishet aces/aros do not belong in gay spaces, bi spaces, lesbian spaces or trans spaces

for me my whole life the LGBT community has been more than that. my perspective is not that of some sad brainwashed child, forced into being more ~tolerant~ than i should be. i genuinely believe and have always believed the LGBT community is more than that, and im not just gonna drop that anytime soon, because i dont think the right to only consider the LGBT community as for “SGA and trans” people is liberation.

therefore cishet aces/aros belong in ace/aro spaces, which for me, count as LGBT.

but not gay, bi, lesbian or trans spaces.

there will be overlap because they are LGBT. but no, cishet aces/aros should have no claim to anything specifically for the L, G, B or T of the community.

for me the community is

Lesbians

Gay men

Bisexuals [SGA or not - as an SGA bi person, i get to speak on this.

Pansexuals

Trans people

Nonbinary people [counting agender, genderfluid, genderqueer, etc. non-cis, non-binary identities]

Intersex people (of course should they want to - the point of this list isn't YOU HAVE TO BE LGBT it's You Can Be Included)

Queer people [anyone who isn't cis or isn't het, including aroace people. non sga bi people im a little iffy on re: them 'reclaiming' queer]

Allies [i think this is important for people in the closet, as long as we dont let cishets get too big for their britches]

Aroaces

and hell, here’s a + to include anything i might have forgotten

aroaces are not functionally cishet.

straight privilege is straight privilege. it isnt not-homophobia privilege. to experience straight privilege you must be straight.

they definitely benefit from not experiencing homophobia. they can be absolute dumbasses abt homophobia for that exact reason.

but they dont experience straight privilege, because they’re not straight. that is all straight privilege has ever meant for me in my LGBT community.

cishet aces are cishet, and also aces. this means they benefit from cis privilege and straight privilege, but aphobia weighs down that straight privilege because they dont perform straightness in the Right way. i dont believe this necessarily makes them systemically oppressed the same way we are. but i dont believe aro or ace identities are privileged either.

there is no coherent Ace Community boogieman that is unanimously a bunch of homophobic, transphobic, racist jackasses, and if you believe that, you are a complete dumbass

yeah, the ace community is comprised of white cishets but, im gonna wager even more commonly, its comprised of literally every LGBT identity and race you can imagine. the ace community is not the white cishet community. it’s the community of everyone who IDs as ace or aro. this is not white cishets as a rule, as a majority, or even half the time.

that being said, inclusionists can say some stupid, shortsighted shit sometimes that is completely ignorant of LGBT history/oppression. i dont agree with the implications that i dont stand for every single thing they say and will not be held accountable for every single thing they say.

similarly, unless you wanna be held accountable for every single thing your side says/does before being allowed to call us out, uh, dont expect the same of us. the onus for this is on exclusionists, i have been around long enough to know you guys started this one. it is up to you guys to start being decent on that one, and then we’ll follow suit. those of us who dont are jackasses.

you are never at liberty EVER to explain to an ace person why their abuse or rape took place. that is called gaslighting, and no, you don’t get to throw a fit when someone calls this what it is. when you call a rape/abuse survivor an annoying disgusting freak for daring to talk about why their rape/abuse happened (since they factually know why it happened and you dont) and then proceed to insist that your headcanon of their trauma is the correct interpretation and theirs is not because theyre a filthy cishet ace (which they rarely are), that is quite literally the definition of gaslighting. and hey, don’t do it.

you are never at liberty EVER to explain to an ace person why their parents forced them into Therapy Specifically Designed To Convert Them Away From Asexuality (which may have a more efficient, shorter name). you dont know how that therapy worked or how the therapist worked because you werent there. you dont know that it was only because of homophobia so therefore this person has no right to claim their own trauma.

not everyone you hate is a cishet ace. don’t call people cishet aces unless you know for a fact they are cishet aces. i imagine you wouldnt want to call a trans lesbian a cishet, which exclusionists have done too many times for me to count. your platform should not be “you said something stupid and harmful, youre a cishet ace,” it should be “you said something stupid and harmful, end of statement.”

for some reason this is a controversial point in some discourse circles, but no one owes you sex. your partners don’t owe you sex. relationships do not equal sex. relationships do not even equal romantic love. relationships are a decision between multiple people on closer emotional intimacy.

if romantic and sexual aspects of a relationship are necessary for you, that’s understandable and okay! but you aren’t OWED that. people don’t need to out themselves as aro or ace for you. people dont need to feel pressured to give you anything they dont want to give. and you dont need to stay in relationships that dont make you happy.

allosexual privilege is not real. no one but white cishet men are 100% celebrated and privileged for experiencing sexual attraction. even white cishet women are oppressed for their attraction in many ways, and repressed from early childhood - so you can imagine how absolutely horrific sex-based oppression is for the LGBT community. we are not celebrated for sexual attraction, we are treated like we are dirty, and we are sexual predators.

WITHIN THE COMMUNITY, yeah, sometimes we are definitely, blatantly favored over aces, and people run around saying asexuality is unnatural, and sexual attraction is what makes us human. this is harmful and damaging, and it shouldn’t happen. i dont consider it systemic oppression and it definitely does not make allosexual privilege a thing.

calling people allosexuals is not something i condone. its not comparable to “cis” as a label, because cis people are an actual oppressor class towards trans people - non-ace LGBP folks are not towards ace people.

intracommunity bigotry is real and it is traumatic. people devalue it constantly and pretend it’s just a slap on the wrist, but it is an absolutely traumatic thing to have to face every day of your life. but it isnt the same as OPPRESSION, and we dont have to conflate the two concepts for intracommunity bigotry to be treated with the seriousness it deserves.

similarly, dont call people REGs unless they are not only aphobes but also truscum or TERFs. i also personally dont really believe in equating aphobes with truscum/TERFs but i dont believe in silencing trans people who openly talk about the similarities, either.

dont call people AERFs unless youre a trans woman holy shit

as someone who was directly affected by the truscum discourse when it happened [not debatable, by the way], this is pretty much recycled truscum discourse in my eyes. you dont need to lecture me on how its not.

just because someone on the “other side” called something you did ableist, misogynist, homophobic, transphobic, racist, etc., does not mean you get to shut your eyes and plug your ears. ESPECIALLY if you are part of a privileged class relevant to that accusation. for example as a white exclusionist you dont get to ignore the concerns of inclusionists of color or lecture them on the racism of the ace community. for example as a cis inclusionist [or honestly, even just a non-trans-woman inclusionist] you dont get to ignore the concerns of trans exclusionist women or lecture them on the similarities between TERFs and exclusionists.

“aspec” is not exclusively for the autistic community and i have NEVER seen claims that it was until ace discourse started. thats transparent as fuck to me and youre not fooling anyone. dont just make shit up lmfao

jokes about how Oh Lol Cringe aces inherently are, arent funny especially considering how many of these Jokes are steeped in anti-autistic ableism

idk when this happened but recently ableist jokes are the new Hot Topic of Comedy and thats like, mind-numbingly bad

i dont care what side youre on, IF YOU ARE USING THINGS LIKE FICTIONAL CP/PEDOPHILIC SHIPS/INCEST/RAPE CONTENT TO COPE WITH YOUR TRAUMA, YOU BETTER BE DOING THAT SHIT IN PRIVATE, ONLY SHARING IT WITH LIKE-MINDED, ADULT SURVIVORS, AND NEVER LETTING THAT CONTENT CIRCULATE OUTSIDE OF THAT GROUP. end of story. no ifs, ands or buts about it. speaking as a survivor who uses stuff like this to cope, being a survivor does not give you a free pass to, inadvertently or not, contribute to the pedophilia and circulation of grooming material on the internet. it is your RESPONSIBILITY as a survivor to not continue that cycle. if you avoid that responsibility, you have no right to play victim or pull the “im a survivor ;-;” card when people call you out on this.

educating kids on asexuality is not pedophilia, grooming or sexual abuse. jesus christ lmfao you dont have to assume people word it in a way thats inappropriate or predatory just because theyre pro-ace. kids NEED label/identity options, they are discovering who they are and without a label that fits for them, theyll likely feel like shit. let them have their labels. knowing about asexuality might greatly improve their life if it fits them!

for this reason, stop being weird about mogai labels/trying to “ban” them from everyone’s vocabulary/trying to turn them into some Cringe Joke that is only about Cishets Trying To Be Special. they didn’t fuck over EVERYONE.

inclusionists, in advising kids and questioning people who ask you for answers, be more open-ended. the insistence of “oh youre not a lesbian you’re a quioromantic demi-homosexual!” without also making it ok to just be a lesbian is what hurt and confused so many people on their journey to discovering their identity and its why they resent the whole mogai thing, fairly so. make it okay to just be a lesbian, or just be gay, or just be bi, or just be trans, while letting people know their other, more specific options.

asexuality is not an NSFW or TMI orientation

ace headcanons arent INHERENTLY homophobic, racist or ableist. they absolutely can be and ive seen that shit with my Own Two Eyes [pure innocent baby ace autistic papyrus headcanons back in the undertale fandom (shudders)], but they are not INHERENTLY so.

headcanons for characters with marginalized identity labels that arent identical to the ones you headcanon that character with are not oppression. and you dont get to police this shit as if its factually wrong

absolutely zero sexual interactions with minors ever, thanks!

trying to Bother The Pure Aceys by talking about sex is unacceptable

posting bullshit in ace positivity tags is unacceptable

stop calling people doing nothing but talking about their experiences “freaks”???

dont engage in the whole Oh There Are Valid Identities And There Are Special Snowflake Identities thing its not a very good look

biphobia is its own thing independent of homophobia

biphobia perpetuated within the community isnt necessarily systemic oppression but its traumatic and wrong and shouldnt be treated like some Lol Cringe Joke

you cant just say UM THAT LITERALLY NEVER HAPPENS???? when someone calls your side out on shit lgfkhghgfh especially when it literally does, all the damn time

ace [IRL person, whether or a celebrity or god forbid a flat out bigot] moodboards arent funny

you shouldnt agree to sex that you as an ace person dont want in a situation that you can control if the sex happens or not, but the pressure to provide sex to a non-ace partner is very real. stop blaming ace ppl for that pressure lol speaking as a victim of coercive sexual abuse, you cannot blame the one who didnt want it, even if they COULD have spoken up.

you’re not a bad person for wanting sex if your ace partner doesn’t. there is nothing immoral about not being ace. you just dont get to have sex anyway and you arent owed it if you are set on this committed, monogamous relationship - if sex is a big deal to you, you need to leave that relationship or work out an open situation.

laughing off peoples’ experiences as The Discourse is completely unacceptable, it encourages people to shut up and never analyze themselves and their identities

its not cute in your ace ship headcanons if the ace character is an asshole that rolls their eyes @ or judges their non-ace partner

similarly its not cute in your ace ship headcanons if the non-ace partner is an asshole that rolls their eyes @ or judges their ace partner

you dont get to tell people “ok you identify as heteroflexible but ACTUALLY you’re [insert identity]” literally ever, i understand the concern with people using “safe” identity labels to avoid facing their LGBT identities but acting on that concern in that way is not concern, its concern-trolling and its not fuckin okay.

legitimizing your own identity by delegitimizing the identities of others is bad

DO NOT, AND I REPEAT, DO NOT, BLANKET-TERM PEOPLE AS QUEER, LITERALLY EVER. DONT DO IT

DONT FUCKIN DO IT!!!!! NOT EVERYONE HAS RECLAIMED THAT SLUR, AND IT IS 100% A SLUR ON TOP OF BEING A CULTURE WITHIN THE COMMUNITY

JESUSS CHRIST DONT FUCKIGN DO IT!!!! WHEN YOU REFERENCE THE QUEER COMMUNITY YOU BETTER ONLY MEAN PPL WHO CALL THEMSELVES QUEER AND HAVE RECLAIMED IT/ARE PART OF THAT SUBCULTURE

we need more nonsexual, non-alcoholic spaces for LGBT folk that are safe for minors, trauma survivors and ace people, but thats not our fault, the prevalence of sexual and alcoholic spaces exists because we were literally not allowed to exist anywhere else until very, VERY recently, and even now it’s a Barely thing

you cant tell someone their experiences didnt happen like my god

we think ace discourse is about more than cishets because exclusionists make it about asexuality as a whole. you guys cant make it about more than cishets and then be like But Ok It’s Just About Cishets You IRrational Crazies?? :/

yes self harm through exposing oneself to the discourse tag is possible, no it’s not funny, no it’s not just ~cishets~doing that, triggers are not exclusive to PTSD survivors, shut the actual fuck up

you dont have any room to comment on the validity of quasiplatonic relationships if you’re not in one, most of the time you guys complaining about them and saying theyre Special Snowflake Things dont actually know what they are. mind your own business lol let people live

if youre not intersex, you dont get to tell people that the intersex community doesnt wanna consider itself LGBT, so they are wrong for saying intersex people are allowed to consider themselves LGBT. youre not being a good ally. sit down, shut up and let intersex people talk amongst themselves.

[to be added to at some point im sure]

asexuals STOLE dragons from CHILDREN to make themselves seem PURE AND INNOCENT, the MONSTERS

#discourse tag

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simptasia · 7 years

Note

How about Charladay for the ship ask?

Thank you, I wanted to be send this pairing! I got really verbose for this!

Daniel/Charlotte

How did they they meet?

Dan and Char happened to be at the dock at the same time. Dan with Eloise and Caroline saying their goodbyes, doing their hugs. Char, carrying her bags onto the boat, sees this from a distance and feels curiosity about this sad and confused looking man. Formal introductions are done on the boat. Naomi introduced the other four members of the science team to each other.

Dan and Charlotte had an instant connection. Dan held the handshake just a bit too long before he realised what he was doing and pulled away bashfully. They both laughed it off nervously. This was a preview for the next 3 months of their relationship. Cute awkward moments, held gazes, and accidental flirting.

(miles, to naomi: [flatly] they’re so cute, i’m gonna throw up)

Who developed romantic feelings first?

Oh, Dan got a crush really quick. Char got feelings for Dan pretty fast too, it just took her a bit to let her admit it to herself.

I think they both felt guilty about crushing on each other, for different reasons. Dan, because his Mom gave him a weird guilt complex about having romantic relationships/feelings (THIS ISN’T EVEN A HEADCANON, THIS IS LITERALLY CANON FROM THE SHOW!!!) and felt like, if likes a girl then she’ll get hurt. Theresa got hurt, after all. And Char, because at this point, pre-island, Dan was really sick. Dan had severe brain damage and Char felt like she if did anything, she’d be taking advantage of somebody who’s mentally impaired.

So their relationship was that of cute friendship, Char taking it upon herself to help and support Dan… and achey pining.

Who is their biggest “shipper?”

I joke but it’s actually Miles. Like, take what I’ve described already and remember… Miles was there. As well as Miles actually thinking they’re cute, it’s genuinely frustrating when two people who are CLEARLY into each other… are just dancing around the subject. Sometimes Miles just wanted to groan “UGH JUST GET IT OVER WITH AND KISS ALREADY” and I imagine he sometimes did make some implicating quips around them, which just embarrassed them.

Miles has a way of playing off his actual emotions as jokes. He actually did want Dan and Char to be together, but he said his remarks in sarcastic way.

The way I see Miles of view of Dan/Char is thus:

30% annoyed, 10% jealous and 60% totally for it (and also he wants in)

When did they have their first kiss and under what circumstances?

[sobbing] muh hu huu… they didn’t kiss in canon. and they sure as fuck didn’t kiss off screen. sure, it’s clear they’re close but not that close yet

So as I see it, their first kiss happened in limbo land, after they both remember. Char, overcome with giddy emotion, kisses Dan. Repeatedly.

Who confessed their feelings first?

Dan, canonically! That scene with Richard (damn Faraday, Richard loves love!)

Char looks genuinely surprised and later on, she even gives Dan a chance to take it back. Which he doesn’t. This fascinates the hell outta me. She didn’t know?!She didn’t know that Dan loved her!! She couldn’t tell?? That’s amazing. It says something about Charlotte that she was disbelieving that Dan loved her.

Oh my gosh, they both thought the feelings were one-sided…

What was their first official date?

Friendship thing that is sort of date-like: As a part of their budding friendship on the boat, they started eating lunch and playing chess together in Dan’s room

Actual date: They started dating in limbo. After running into each other a few times, Char decided they should meet again on purpose and gave Dan her number. They went to a cafe for their first date.

How do they feel about double dates/group dates?

AND MILES MAKES THREE

[ahem] uh, well, i think once they all remember, that they would all want to spend time together and this leads to things… polyamorous things…

What do they do in their down time?

watch tv & movies, mostly star trek

talk and talk and taaaalk

KISS AND CUDDLE (and also bang)

i’ve pictured them playing piano together. or at least, char sits next to him and happily sings badly

What was the first meeting of parents as an official couple like?

i think it goes without saying that this takes place in limbo right?

in this life, eloise hasn’t got her reasons to be possessive of dan so she’d be less of a total bitch to char as she was to theresa. but char is quick to remind ellie that hey, you killed you son and i don’t like you. dan is conflicted (as in the two lives they’ve lived are conflicting and he legit isn’t sure how to feel)

jeanette is just like, oh haha of course an american

What was their first fight over and how did they get past it?

going back to boat times now. dan has a bad day (like all mentally ill people he has good days and bad days) where he isn’t holding it together and is letting out some bitterness, and he voices some frustrations against his mother & upbringing. then he quickly backtracks and downplays what he said

char impulsively responds to this by telling him not to defend his mother (because from what char had heard, ellie’s terrible. and she is)

this causes dan and char to have an… upsetting back and forth

how they got past it? well, the tone was only angry for a bit and quickly went to sadness and then comforting, which leads to a tearful hug (and thats good)

also dan didn’t remember this the next day

Which one is more easily made jealous?

jealous is a strong word. i can see dan feeling glum, not jealous

and char wouldn’t feel any threat towards their relationship to feel jealous

What is their favourite thing to get to eat?

dan: noodle & pasta products

char: CHOCOLATE

Who’s the cuddly one? What their favourite cuddling position?

i was about to say both but altho char is plenty cuddly, we all know that dan would be on a whole new level. i take great joy in how tactile this character is and this i must revel in it. cuddles and petting and nuzzles and kisses!!!!

oh boy all of the positions have their merits, like:

char spooning dan. being held tight whilst curled up a bit

dan spooning char. hands on her body, face in her hair

dan laying on char’s chest… hand on tit!

char on dan’s chest (careful there), hands on back, waist or arse and also the hair because dan has two hands

all of these sound like dreams come true (both dan’s dreams and mine)

Are they hand holders?

YESSS!!!! [SMASHES THAT MOTHERFUCKING LIKE BUTTON!!!]

How long do they wait before sleeping together for the first time? What’s the circumstances?

Liiiimbo land again.

So I already decided, they go on a few dates without remembering their living lifes. Then when they do remember, after they’re over the shock, Char is very on board with making up for lost time and takes Dan to her place. [winks loudly]

So however long it takes to have like three dates, I guess. A month??

Who tops?

ah bless, this questionnaire was not made for m/f ships

but technically speaking… both

char has a strap on, because i said so. and dan wants to know what it feels like, having been curious about the activity for quite some time

What’s the worst first they’ve ever gotten into?

Hmm… thinking about it… I imagine most of their firsts go well

Altho I do imagine their first time having sex is wonderful but Dan gets a sensory overload afterwards (as an autistic person, this is cathartic for me to imagine)

Who does the shopping and the cooking?

either, both… [shrugs]

Which one is more organized and prone to tidiness?

i decided long ago that none of the science team are neat… but dan is the most neat, which isn’t saying much. because i imagine he has pens and paper and leftovers every where. and char’s got like, her papers everywhere too. and tea mugs in places. tho char does get annoyed at left out plates & cups

so basically, they’re both messy but with standards

Who proposes?

AWWW! I don’t know! I have pictured them getting married…

but I dunno how they got there… it feels like a Dan thing to bring up. But none of that knee and box stuff. He holds both her hands in his and asks her.

Do they have joined Bachelor/Bacheloette parties or separate?

Hahahaha, oh nooo, there’s no way this would happen. No matter how much Miles wants Dan to have one. (Miles just ends up going to a strip club alone)

Who is the best man/maid of honour? Any other groomsmen or bridesmaids?

Miles has gotta be best man. And we didn’t see Naomi in limbo but we should have, and she’s gonna be there. Quite a lot of the other characters have already moved on, so it limits Dan and Char’s already limited options, ya see.

Frank and Richard

Big Ceremony or Small?

no feelings generated about this except… outside

Do they have a honeymoon? If so, where?

I hadn’t imagined anything specific for… holy shit, it occurs to me that Char is an Indiana Jones type anthropologist. She could take Dan anywheres in the world and he’d never have been there (for altho he is rich, he is just a boy with a heart full of music) and she’d be jazzed as fucked to show him the WORLD

fuck the honeymoon, i’ve created a spin off idea

Do they have children? How many?

I like to think that if they did have a kid, it’d be a son named Desmond. Because that’s what I give them in Sims.

#lost headcanons #drdanielfaraday #haroldwrens

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bfilmblues-blog · 7 years

Text

Movie Review - The Last Slumber Party

No, this movie isn’t about a large surgeon fighting thunder storms. That would be an awesome movie though.

Pros: One of the most nonsensical twists I have ever seen in a movie which is kind of entertaining.

Cons: Birth of a Nation was less controversial and hateful. The theme song is now burned into my brain and unfortunately the only cure is death. Terrible ending. Terrible acting. Terrible killer. The longest quest for Orange Juice I have ever seen in any form of media.

Let me start by saying that normally as a fan of questionable music taste I can listen to the most horrible of audio treats in the world and still wear a grin on my face. Vaporwave? Bring it on. That bootleg Gaslamp Killer cut? Whatever, sounds good. That rare ICP/DMX beta track that was found in an abandoned grave in small Mexican village? Let's turn it up. Still, out of everything that has poisoned my ears "LETS GO OUT TONIGHT" is by far the worst song I have ever heard in my life.

I don't say this lightly, who ever made that song is a terrible person but also some kind of autistic savant of audio, some kind of reverse Johann Sebastian Bach who hated both music and people. Not only does this song play every three seconds in the movie, but it also seems to have the ability to drown a ton of the dialog as well which makes it even more aggravating. Nothing shows this more then the very first scene where 99% of the dialog is drowned out in a classroom, which should be the easiest fucking place in the world to capture decent audio. I could go on for pages about how atrociously bad the sound is, but it really is something that one can only experience for themselves. I have watched a ton of low quality movies that has worse recording when it came to the audio, but it was a blessing because those movies often were terrible and not hearing the actors (Or your drunk friends you paid $2 to attempt drama) was normally a good thing. The sad part was, I was actually kind of interested in The Last Slumber Party because I am pretty sure it might be one of the most 80's of all 80's slashers I have ever seen and I was trying to find out what the hell was the deal with all the plot holes and illogical scenes put into this movie.

Well, joke is on me, I watched this like five times now and while I fully understand every line due to a crack team of Chinese secrete police who transcript the movie for me, nothing still makes sense.

The movie starts with three extremely unattractive women and the three counterpart boyfriends they have talking about summer vacation, how much summer is going to rule, and how some nerd in the background named Science rules because he helped them with their biology homework.

The three most beautiful women of Louisiana!

Meet Chris, Tracy, and Linda. Here is a easy chart to describe each character.

Chris:

Red Hair

Hates people with a different sexuality then hers so much she has to comment about it about 50230 times every single day.

Loves to drink all day, wake up at 4:00 AM, then continue drinking.

Might be a meth addict in real life.

Tracy:

Blonde

Extremely boring and stupid.

For some reason needs to bring every phone into the bathroom.

Only has like 5 lines.

Linda:

Nerd.

Has a dad who is a lackluster neurosurgery doctor.

Is holding a sleepover in the ugliest house on earth.

Really wants Man-nerd bad, which is odd because they are going out already. Don't know what that is about.

For the men counterpoints, I can't remember their names but assume each are named Jock, Goof, and Man-Nerd and they all fit the same tables as above.

Class is about to end and summer vacation is right about to start (But they are all like 30?) and the girls talk about the kickin' rad slumber party they are going to have that and if they should invite boys or not. Chris says a party without sex and men is a waste, Linda kind of twiddles her thumbs and agrees while talking about her lust over Man-nerd, and Tracy tries to remember she is in a movie but fails to do so and nibbles on her hair tips while drooling. Everyone cheers when the Bell rings, the conversation continues, and everyone goes home.

Later that night at a hospital entrance, a nurse walks out complaining that no one wants to have sex with her, which is odd considering she looks like the most attractive person in this film. She goes to a bus stop and waits on a bench while some sleepy guy next to her snores. She complains and complains and complains until finally the audience is granted mercy as our killer comes out to change things up. The killer is by far, in the movie, the most lazy of all slasher killers I have ever seen and consists of some random dude wearing scrubs. That's it, he just looks like some random guy at the ER. Anyways, the killer moves a scalpel in front of her face and she dies from this somehow. Sleepy guy, despite hearing her complain nonstop, scream bloody murder, and the struggle does not wake up. He wakes up afterwards and starts complaining that the bus is taking forever. The killer, obviously annoyed at this doofus, kills sleepy guy for a double whammy.

The face of evil. Hygienic evil. Also, that's the director.

We eventually learn the killer is some kind of random guy who had a lobotomy and became evil for no reason. With part of his brain gone, he now runs around town lightly stabbing people and being a jerk at various parties. Other then that, we never get a name, motivation, or any further background on him. Hell, even in the credits they just label him "Maniac" which is the height of laziness. The only snippets we get are when Linda's dad gets various phone calls we can't hear and he can blandly reply with things like "Oh, that maniac escaped? That's too bad." and "I need to find that maniac. I think."

Now, I have seen a bunch of bad actors in my day, but I might have to say the actor playing Linda's father may be near the worst. Every line he has is read with zero emotion. He can't have any facial expression besides minor puzzlement. Also, he sounds like a robot. I'm not joking when I say that all the actors in Birdemic did a better job then this asshole.

We finally get the titular slumber party and uh... well, not much is happening.

...You guys wanna play monopoly or something?

The girls sit around in various moo-moo's and sleep jerseys while looking bored as hell doing nothing. They do have a slight dance at the start, but it's interrupted by Linda's dad who says he has to get Orange Juice, for the girls to behave, the music they are playing sucks and he then leaves the house. After being burned on the music, they sit down and watch TV where a black static image of a news logo tells them that two people were murdered at the bus stop! DUN DUN DUUAAAAA~ - But they don't care because it's not connected to them in anyway and it’s Louisiana, so people get murdered all the time.

Of course, after hearing about the horrific murders, they immediately think of romance and debate on calling "Men-folk". It's at this point in the movie where suddenly every single person has a southern accent. There was no southern accents before, but now they are in full force. Every sentence ends with "Bless ya'll hearts" and "NASCAR RULES!".

Before they can call dem' ol' boys - well, they show up. They knock on the window with dumb Halloween masks and Chris calls them gay homo's for like, a half hour before they leave to go get some beer. This is a reoccurring theme in the movie where Chris will have a discussion with one of the male counterparts and often goes into a diatribe about how they must be gay and love the idea of having men tongue every orifice they own in a hedonistic sodomy session. It's really nonsensical and so out of place, but almost 90% of her script reads like bizarre homoerotic sex fantasy the director must keep hidden.

Welcome to beautiful Louisiana!

At the gas station, the guys drink in the parking lot when Linda's dad shows up still on his holy quest for Orange Juice. They talk back and forth when Linda's dad is like "Welpp... shit, prob - no Orange juice at this gas station, I better check my work. By work, I mean, the hospital." and just leaves the set. Science, the nerd from the first scene shows up. The guys throw a beer at Science and tell him to party hard, because it's summer! Science looks slightly miffed at this friendly jest and leaves. The guys then describe in great detail who is going to have sex with who, how much summer vacation rules and about how much fun it is to drink beer. All in all, seems like normal high school talk, except you know, that they all look 30-ish.

Back at the slumber party, the girls debate still for another five fucking hours if they should call the boys. Uh - They already said they were coming back. Calm down, ladies. After talking about boys, calling boys, and if smoking pot is cool (They come to conclusion it's not while continuing to pound shots) they finally decide it's time for bed. While they are heading upstairs, one of the boys somehow ends up at the house before the rest of them, had a ladder placed against the bedroom window, and climbs up and enters the room just as the ladies enter it. They pull him inside and after an absurdly awkward conversation between Chris and him involving homosexuality, Chris pushes the girls out the room and explains she wants to get busy. Before that, though, she has to shower. Uh - Ok. She tells him to lay on the bed and in the connecting bathroom, she showers for what seems like four hours - during that time, Science comes into the bedroom and kills Jock-kid who was laying there waiting for some muskrat love. After killing him, he puts his body in the closet.

Huh.

Now you are thinking - Why would Science kill this guy? Is Science the main killer now? The answer to both of those questions are I don't know, and no. For some reason, that light joke about being more upbeat about summer vacation really set off Science, so now he has a blood lust. Whatever. They never explain or show why Science would kill the people who liked him or why he would kill them, but also do their homework for them too, but uh - arughh - my brain.

Chris comes out and in frustration that another man would accept death rather then have relations with her screams to the heavens calling Jock-man a fag and queerbait nonstop over and over before finally getting exhausted from her rant and heading back downstairs with the other girls. Science hides in the corner of the room during all this and is able to not be found. Once again, I’m not sure why Science is there or why he is filled with murderous rage, but hey, that’s horror for you.

Like poetry, Tracy finds goof kid, they go upstairs to have sex and goof kid asks if she has any drugs. Unsure if she does have drugs, Tracy goes into the bathroom to search for some while Science murders the hell out of this loser and chucks his body out the window. During this time, the real killer comes in from the ladder and watches Science doing his stuff while nodding in approval.

Just so you know, there is now two killers in this room, both have not communicated with each other and both are easily hiding in different places in the room. Only the real killer knows Science is in there. While Science does his normal hide in the closet, real killer decides he is a under the bed guy.

Tracy leaves the bedroom, calls goof kid a homo a couple of times because of his disappearance, then screams because she finds a knife the floor. All the girls meet up in the room and discuss where the knife could have came from. After a slight bickering session, they decide it's all a prank from the guys and all cuddle in bed together to go to sleep. In the same room. With the two killers. Oddly enough, the killers leave them be and continue hiding. Seriously. They sleep for like five hours and no one disturbs them. Pretty polite killers, really.

You know a film is bad when even the dude who likes FIRSTRYKE says it's bad.

Chris has a dream where she wanders around a house for like twenty minutes doing nothing while terrible synth music plays. Finally, after the most boring dream of all time, she gets stabbed by various people and wakes up. All the girls are fine, everyone is still asleep. Also, the killers might be asleep too, who knows? Anyways, Chris gets up and decides it's time to start drinking. Hitting the liquor cabinet that isn't hers, she picks up the phone right when it rings (Rude) and gets some heavy breathing. Freaked out, she runs upstairs and tells the other girls about the dreadful phone call. They both could care less. Speaking of phone calls, the conversation then cuts to them debating if they should call the boys again for the 100th time. It’s like, 5:00 AM. Jeez, calm down ladies.

Chris is like "Whatever, I'm drinking" and Linda goes with her. Tracy continues to sleep in bed where she is almost murdered by Science in her sleep, but Science is dispatched by our main killer and is thrown out the window. Haha, that's what you get for not enjoying summer vacation, NERD! Main killer then kills Tracy, stabs Linda off screen, and sits around the bedroom doing nothing. Chris continues to drink when Linda's mom gets a call waking her up from dad saying he is still getting orange juice and will be back home soon. Dude? It's been like 10 hours. This causes Linda's mom to get up and tell Chris to shut the gate outside for some reason. Chris goes outside and see's the guys car, confused why there would be a car but no boys to call gay, she goes into detective mode.

And here is where the movie hits a climax. By climax, I mean the most absurd and slow ending ever put into a horror film. Chris walks around the house looking at nothing forever. There was less walking and looking in Homeward Bound. Honestly, it’s just like ten minutes of her walking around a house inspecting various things while the killer always hides somewhat in random frames and looking as goofy as possible. After the longest walking scene in any film ever created, Chris discovers the phone lines have been cut and Tracy is dead upstairs. Chris, by far, has the best reaction to this I have ever seen as she goes “Eh” and just walks out of the the room.

Jeepers Creepers, Fuck. Oh well, time to drink.

Now, I know it’s Louisiana and I assume it must be pretty normal there to see your best friend murdered by some kind of random violence, but it may just be a bit of bad acting when you have no emotional reaction whatsoever to seeing a corpse in a bed. Like, I get it, acting is hard or whatever, but come on, lady. Chris wanders around till she gets back downstairs and Linda's mom bumps into her. She is like “Oh, uh - I’m dead.” and just falls over holding her throat. We are supposed to assume she was stabbed and wandering around in a panic, but instead she looks kind of bored and lazily falls onto a sofa. Neat.

Linda then also taps Chris on the shoulder and says “Get help.” before also falling on the floor dead from an invisible stab wound. Why, this slumber party is terrible... in fact, I hope it’s The Last Slumber Party! Once again, despite seeing two people she knows die, Chris has no reaction whatsoever and proceeds to walk around the house some more, because twenty minutes of that wasn’t enough. Armed with a large knife, she walks and walks and walks and walks an - Whoops, in a moment of awkwardness, Chris believes she notices the killer and lunges her knife at a figure around a corner and it’s the last doppelganger boyfriend. He dies instantly and yet again Chris has no reaction to this, but instead is just like “Meh.” while leaving the knife inside of him and walking off.

Finally, Chris meets the killer. Who will win? They both almost have similar body counts and only one may survive. Truly, this will be an epic battle of survival as - Oh, Chris just stabs him once and he dies. Well, shoot, that was easy. After a full night of binge drinking and murder, Chris passes out next to the killer in the kitchen. Huh... so fifty minutes of walking and a 10 second battle between the killer and the final survivor? Now that is some good film making.

Finally, dad comes home and HEY - He still forgot the Orange Juice! What the hell has this idiot been doing for eleven hours? He goes inside his home and looks at everything all broke/smashed up and his phone lines cut. He rolls his eyes, goes to the fridge and drinks a tall glass of orange ju - Ugh. I just - Come on, director. After his beverage, he continues to look around, still continues to look around, and finally is like “Meh, I should go to work” and drives to work, where upon reaching work he rides the elevator up to his office where he is killed by the killer. How did the killer get up there? Who knows. Anyways, Chris wakes up in the house, steps outside towards the pool, and that Killer must have the fastest running legs on earth because he is now back at the house and attempts to kill her in the pool. Alas, with a big fuck you to the audience, Chris suddenly wakes up and it was all a dream.

Now, “It was a dream” endings are always terrible, but this one somehow continues the stride of doing things on a legendary bad scale decides not only was that not enough, but to keep pushing and somehow get the most dumb ending of all time. Chris wakes up, calls her friends and asks if they are still doing the slumber party. Blah blah blah - Chris goes to her Linda's house and the killer sneaks in, it’s like some eternal loop of bad plot holes and confusion. Scream, credits.

You can watch the whole movie on Youtube, I believe. Check it out and let me know what you think. I would normally write a conclusion, but I just can’t for movie. It’s abysmally bad but at the same time unlike most b-films it is not entertaining either. It’s some weird void of garbage that never brought joy or happiness to anyone or anything.

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