#i used to think about her constantly

[headphonemouse]

Pining hell

#in recently memory i have not wanted something with the intensity that i wanted to close the distance of 5 centimeters and press our sides #together. we were SO close. gravity was literally on my side we were sitting in a playground slide hiding from the sun my legs were swung #over the side she sat at the base and all i had to do was relax a little and i would have slid right into her #and she would have let me #when i saw her again for the first time in years she called to say she was walking down the street towards me and we would see each other #soon and i ran. i wanted to see her so bad so i ran and we ended up on opposite sides of the highway with no crossing #hi #from across the telephone line #and we talked like that until we got to the traffic light and she crossed to meet me and i wanted to hug her and look at her all at once #i looked at her. she'd lost some weight. she wears flat shoes now instead of the heels she adores. she cut her bangs #some time between the shared plate of french fries and the rose bushes we walked past time started moving again and i thought about the #future. for once looking forward to it. where would i go? what would i do? i didnt know before but i knew then i wanted it to be with her #ive always kind of known that #i used to think about her constantly #over the years i thought about her less and less but still often enough to maintain contact #hi it has been *checks timestamp* SIX DAYS?! #only six days since i wrote all the above and istg i felt time slowing down and stopping the longer i went without her #until i just kinda. settled back into living without her #six days ago it was unbearable #now im just as i have been for the past several years #and its kind of sad seeing that play out #but also by nature of getting used to it i cant even really get sad about it #its like listening to someone else distant from me talk about a foreign concept #love‚ i think i understood it just a little bit a week ago #it seems to have felt great #i dont remember it all that well anymore #talking tag

[shaxza]

#dahlia hawthorne #ace attorney #phoenix wright #dahlia x phoenix #alexa play dark red by steve lacy #my art #since i dont want to make a dedicated post let me use my notes to vent about how much i love dahlia conceptually and how much i wish AA + #writers weren't sexist #dahlia was given the shittiest set of cards when she was a kid and she was a victim of grooming by that terry loser #she is CONSTANTLY objectified and sexualised and i think her design as a skinny young looking individual makes it even more distasteful #but i think it works if the writers could have done something with that #what i love about dahlia and phoenix's relationship is the contrast - phoenix needs to see people as innocent before jumping to help them v #dahlia who has if you think about it is innocent to a degree given how fucked up her childhood was #dahlia could have been a great case study into compassion for phoenix as she has hurt him directly but in his role as a lawyer he has to se #past certain flaws so justice can be served #and it can PUSH his understanding of what is “guilty” #yes dahlia killed people but also i choose to believe her worldview was severely warped by her enviornment and she's a product of it #or if they wanted to make her a villain and stick with it i think as a rival ro phoenix she should have been a cautionary tale #of what happens when you never learn to move beyond the shitty hand youve been dealt with and live non judgementally #anyways ^_^

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Name twinsies!

(Based on the community consensus about LWJ's grey horse's name)

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #equineswap au #xiao pingguo #little apple #lan wangji #lan wunian #Took some inspiration from Pio's incredible art of horse wangji because i am merely a student in the art of horse #anyhow when I asked yall about lwj’s horse I did not think it would result in a overwhelming consensus that he’d just use ‘Wangji’ #its funny as hell in canon but as an equineswap? Pure Gold #I also really need to emphasis that the ponies *do talk* in this AU. They are a co-existing civilized species #LWJ (horse) is just a quiet guy. And Little Apple hasn't been around a lot of horses #so she thinks her talking donkey roommate who suddenly switched personalities is an exception not the norm #little apple is constantly violating politeness norms by only addressing the pony’s accompanying human and not them #LWJ has achieved that alicorn immortality in this AU so yeah #this human girl was absolutely named after the horse. Possibly *by* horse lan wangji #sometimes a horse girl raises a horse and sometimes a horse raises a horsegirl #thank you once again to tumblr user clintbeefwoods for suggesting Lan Wunian as another name! It’s very well suited for her! #and i can tag the lan wangjis’ separately now <3

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

i've convinced myself that Sunny is a serial gossiper, except the only other dragon that knows is Clay bc they're best buddies <3

#also click for better quality tumblr sucks and i draw small #hc that when they lived in the caves she'd just be constantly gossiping to clay #he wouldn't gather his own gossip but he'd keep up with her ramblings #sunny keeps it up at the academy and they have end-of-day gossip sessions #except this time he's started actively participating because he has his own tea now #im having feelings about these two as you can see #but im pretty sure sunny was consistently using clay as her personal jungle gym #so i think it'd be super cute if she's always just on him. they're the most tactile of the sibs i think #so for gossiping she'd just drape herself over his neck so that she can whisper and be understood #OH NO IM HAVING THOUGHTS ABOUT THE DRAGONETS' CAVE DAYS AND THE CHARACTER DYNAMICS/SHENANIGANS #my art #dragons #wof #dragonets of destiny #wings of fire #scribble salad #also i think their dynamic is like pike & grog's if youve watched vox machina #im slowly falling back into the wof pit send help and a rope please #mostly bc im fuckin around with dragon designs #like i based sunny a little off of a hognose snake + gave her speckling bc of thorn and qibli #and then with clay i want to go crocodile/bison??? except his horns turn down obviously #they stick out a little too #i want mudwings to have more goat/ram geared horn shapes #i havent read the books in years so forgive me

[milfygerard]

but fr outside of my contracted madness i absolutely refuse to give joe alwyn gold rush like how is that song at all related to their relationship the lyrics clearly spell out a relationship that either never existed or only existed in implication and fantasies and maybe-maybe nots and its so bitter and yet desperately soft in the bridge where it almost projects a sense of envy, of wanting to be them as much as you want them. It continues an interesting oft ignored lyrical trend of taylor wanting just as much to be her lover as to have them, envying their easy charisma (you were flush with the currency of cool/i was always turning out my pockets) or quiet dignity (your integrity makes me seem small) dating back to her earliest songs (the kind of flawless i wish i could be). Theres a projected self hatred and yearning to be better that twists itself into both romantic and sexual lust for her partners thats so fascinating and speaks to how all of her songs regardless of who theyre about are also an act of self reflection on who she is and who she wishes to be.

#barry.txt #taylor swift #putting this in the tags as a form of self protection but make no mistake this is a gay thing to do especially in gold rush #which through simple context clues is Obviously About A Woman or maybe even women in general #whivh is a totally seperate post on how taylor constructs and uses gender identity in her music #her girlhood and femininity are earnest but also so carefully constructed and so high effort and kind of desperate #shes a deeply self concious and obsessive person who never looks comfortable in anything ever unless shes #onstage or like. by herself in loose jeans and a tshirt #i think thats one of the things that subconsciously irritate ppl when it comes to her shes constantly and clearly putting in effort #to appear As The Celebrity Taylor Swift and struggles not to self censor or overperform in interviews (when she gives them) #especially present in pre 1989 interviews where the interviewers really didnt have to respect her or worry abt how they frame her #if they didnt want to. Like the fearless era rolling stone interview where she almost has a meltdown over her mom buying eggnog instead of #milk. That whole interview is strange looking back not just bc of the weird misogyny but also because of what it does share #taylor is....weird. She has a strange and desperate vibe and always reacts slightly too much and uses slang poorly #shes media trained and has learned how to socialize but you can feel her discomfort whenever she doesnt have a guitar in her hand #idk these tags have once again gotten so unweildy. i just find it interesting that she finally feels some level of comfortable #in sharing that construction w us in songs like mirrorball and mastermind and imo gold rush #and scene #should i write this up and put it in the swiftieism zine #i should write something and put it in the swiftieism zine

[wingsofwater]

peach pit

[id : a chubby skywing dragon named pyrite, who has yellowish-orange scales with a lighter yellow underbelly and dark freckles across her scales, resembling the inside of a peach. she has a crest of dark spines along the back of her neck and on the tip of her tail, antler-like horns, her body is dappled with scars, and she wears a cord around her neck like a choker. she is sitting down, facing towards the left, with her wings held open and an uncertain expression on her face. the background is a teal rectangle with inverted peach blossoms overlayed on top of it. end id]

#thinking a lawttt about how pyrite was described to be the same color as a peach a lot #the freckles as described in the id are supposed to make her look like the inside of a peach #she has scars all over her body bc she was enchanted to be really clumsy so i would imagine she would be constantly getting hurt by acciden #her feet [and other skywing feet] have a fifth toe on the back kinda like raptor claws that they use for balance and grabbing things #in winter turning the original pyrite[?] was described to have black eyes so i gave her really big pupils - #- that would probably make her eyes look black head-on #she has lil bear ears btw !! i think skywings and icewings have bear ears bc theyre smaller and wont get cold as easily . also theyre cute #i just thought the crest of spines would look cute but then i realized the resemblance to icewing spikes so i added them to the tail too #the antler horns looking like icewing reindeer horns also wasnt intentional i just wanted them to look unique - #- instead of the generic straight horns or curved i usually give skywings #i think ​she has quite a bit of icewing remnants left over despite the spell actually #like i would imagine her fire is weaker than the other skywings and would be a lot less hotter #she also instinctively isnt used to skywing proportions hence why shes sitting the way she is with her legs all weird and wings not closed #other than that shes rather boring and isnt very flamboyant bc i think scarlet would think she doesnt deserve it #i dont really have any other design notes everything was added last second or by complete accident gafksndkxk #I JUST REALIZED THE THUMB ON HER WING IS BACKWARDS . I WAS WONDEIRN WHY IT LOOKED WEIRD CKJFMCJXNX #whatever im not fixing it. suffer with me #🖌 #wings of fire skywing #wings of fire #wings of fire pyrite #og my GODDD tumblr eated the wuality on this one real bad wtfff

[fluffs-n-stuffs]

Finally catching up on the Horizons episodes I missed 👍

#fluff binges !!! #I've missed out this one and the one from last week that I'll watch once I settle my work for tonight--mainly due from a whirlwind on my en #even if it were just for two weeks I missed these sillies sm 🥺🥺🥺 #Diana was finna gonna murder that man you gotta respect that #I think I saw online that not that many people liked this episode because of the main concern that Friede usually saves the day #I do get that though I actually really enjoyed this episode because I think it's one of Roy's best battles (aside from the top one which wa #--the confrontation with the explorers in Diana's hideout) #he got a couple hits in and even thought to send in Wattrel when he realized that he'd get an advantage up in the air which was so so good #the kiddos mainly fumbled this time 'round because they forgot about the foongus/didn't have another mon to counter it #(maybe Hatena could've countered but Liko still needs to learn How to use her in battles--she does want to help though !!! with how she #--moved that shovel on her own - which I thought was a nice lil indicator of a possible battle highlighting her in the future) #I loooved that moment at the end with Diana showing the dude his true self through Bronzor's reflection that was actually very sweet #so yeah it's a simple ep but an enjoyable one - I think people gotta chill with constantly wanting peak sdkjfskndjfs #loads of Horizons content are focused on character moments and a slice of life feeling to everything which is something I love personally #this is a nice breather after the insanity of the last arc methinks hehe #anipoke #pokeani #pokemon horizons #diana pokemon #arcanine

[weepycat]

the full email is posted here but this paragraph from rachel corrie's last email to her mother in 2003 before she was killed by an israeli bulldozer is absolutely fucking harrowing over 20 years later.

I look forward to seeing more and more people willing to resist the direction the world is moving in: a direction where our personal experiences are irrelevant, that we are defective, that our communities are not important, that we are powerless, that the future is determined, and that the highest level of humanity is expressed through what we choose to buy at the mall.

#it's devastating #especially watching discourse around boycotts as the worst case scenario unfolds. #but i think allies need to hear her more now than ever... #i've seen discussion surrounding motaz calling us useless #and it's true. #not in a self-centered sense of personal guilt #but in that we have been made to believe that we are powerless to resist this #that eventually the embers of peoples' effort will die #that we have no say in our government #but we do #you do #i dont even live in the USA anymore but i can still buy e-sims and stand firm in my beliefs #even if it means constantly learning about more atrocities and constantly arguing and defending my stance #the work must be tireless when you rage against a machine #it might not feel like much... but it's honest work.

[grey-edges]

someone convince me to like piper mclean im begging. idc if i have to get spoiled

i wanna like piper SO BAD but i’m struggling soo hard. ive just finished house of hades moments ago and she had her badass moments but every interaction with jason pissed me off. i’ve been trying to hold out through this series in hope that she gets better bc i want to love her so bad but she’s so infuriating.

this scene in particular, chapter 34 jasons pov pissed me off:

it’s understandable to be jealous of an ex (not that reyna has been confirmed thus far to actually have dated jason, just crushes) but magically altering jasons thoughts?? that’s so messed up

my biggest comparison is love potions in Harry Potter which are super frowned upon and are basically a form of date rape. is that not the same thing as how she’s using her charmspeak??? convincing both jason and herself that they’re together?? even later she has moments where jason describes her voice influence over him in even more casual settings not just about reyna.

jason here is such a people pleaser and has been convinced he’s not worthy of his own thoughts and opinions his wholeeee life that he willingly lets her convince him of their ‘love.’ he doesn’t think he deserves to have his own say because he never has. she totally has been taking advantage of that. but ig that’s an analysis for another time

i know they break up but whenever it happens it’s not soon enough in my opinion. i actually liked her in the lost hero up until the end when she declared jason as hers before anything had even happened. in fact i was rooting for her and jason for a minute because i thought it was sweet until it became weird and she clung so hard to gaea’s mist memories of them and refused to accept the truth. she’s not a girls girl and im not here for it, maybe it’s the time these books were written cause i know the “i’m not like other girls” mentality was at a high but idk it’s got to be more than that

idk i’m fully down to hear someone out about why they like her/her redemption. literally anything. because at this point i’ve just had to remake her character in my own mind in order to like her. but i want to like her in canon too

#i had a whole rant about her (lack of) powers too and then i was sort of proven wrong with the khione scene #but idk i still think she’s the weakest link of the seven #who said that??? #anyways please convince me to like her #i genuinely have been trying to give her a chance but she’s making it so hard #not to mention how she’s constantly like ‘wahhh i dont want to use my powers on my friends wahhh’ then immediately proceeds to use her #powers on her friends and to convince her bf to stay with her #piper mclean #piper hoo #piper pjo #hoo #heroes of olympus #percy jackson #pjo #house of hades #hoh #jason grace #anti jasiper #anti jiper #what’s their ship name?

[cordycepsbian]

"we're probably not going to draw our ideas for this because a lot of other people have done this crossover and we have too many crossover aus already" and yet, only three days later,

#bug fables #hollow knight #bf leif #bf vi #bf kabbu #bf chompy #stuff i made tag #we mentioned vessel vi earlier so we just. had to draw her #she still has a boomerang so when she gets the dreamnail upgrade it could be the... dreamerang #(we are booed off the stage) #kabbu is partly based on ogrim because they're both scarabs #chompers are just mobile fool eaters so of course that's what chompy is #leif is very normal. being constantly melting is typical for moths #we will stop talking here but if you want to know more about our ideas for this just send us an ask #because we do have old worldbuilding from thinking about this some time in the past

[makotonaegiunderstander]

something I’ve been thinking abt is how many people think Makoto is immune to despair. I don’t think he is. I think becoming the ultimate Hope was BECAUSE he felt despair. He wouldn’t have fully reached that point without Junko. Makoto becoming such a beacon was his last attempt to avoid completely falling and it wasn’t because he didn’t feel despair, it was because he was too damn stubborn to allow everything to go to waste and he refused to sacrifice his beliefs for someone else’s. His inner monologue tells me he DID experience the same new low the other suvivors did in the final trial, but at the point where he had the choice to give up and die, he looked at the others and he looked at Junko and he couldn’t allow it to happen, not out of self preservation, but because the idea that Junko would have control over their lives made him FURIOUS. and that utter refusal to die kicked in, wether luck or otherwise, and he made the concious effort for one last push while something in him was breaking. He had to be broken in order for the Ultimate Hope to come through so aggressively, bc it could only exist in the face of the Ultimate Despair. He snapped the same way she did, but in the other direction. In what could have been his final moments he chose to embody everything Junko wasn’t, and every single optimistic and luck fueled ideal in him suddenly charged forward and pushed him. It was a combination of the final straw and a choice. Makoto isn’t immune to feeling despair, he’s just too stubborn to fall into it of his own volition. I think that’s why I like that scene in DR3 so much. People were SO SHOCKED Makoto actually fell for the tape, that he actually became despair for a moment. I saw people getting mad or disappointed, saying it was pathetic and Makoto seemed to fall from some sort of pedestal for them. Honestly part of me wonders if that sort of mentality, which clearly people had in universe, affected Makoto a bit. Like he started to see himself as less of a person, subconsciously. Prompting him to take more risks, less self preservation, act way more bold. It seems he has to be reminded a lot not to put himself in danger by his friends, to not do something too reckless. All over the place I would see in regards to that scene either this frivolous ‘oh this was just angst drama with no meaning behind it’ or ‘he can do better than that. he’s so weak’ or ‘come on, there’s no way he’d fall into despair, he’s the Ultimate Hope!’ This kind of mentality, which was kind of ironic considering Ryota was there the entire time saying the same thing and treating Makoto the same way. Like Makoto was superhuman. Like Makoto didn’t feel despair the same way ‘normal people’ did. In a way that was also how Munakata saw Makoto. Makoto stopped being a PERSON to the world when he became Ultimate Hope, he became a concept, a belief system, much the same way Junko ascended beyond herself. But the difference is that treating Makoto that way is the opposite of the reason Makoto became such a representative for hope. He wasn’t doing something no one else could. He was doing something everyone had the chance to, he just… was a little more optimistic, a little more stubborn, a little more ‘gung-ho’ about things. He just took the lead where no one else did, where no one else knew they even COULD in the face of Junko’s unstoppable force. She had overcome the biggest threats and obstacles in the world, what could one person do? And the answer Makoto found was, anything. Everything. It doesn’t all rest on Makoto, he’s just the one that was inspired to try to do what seemed like the impossible. But as evidenced by the change in his friends after that trial, it’s clearly not something only Makoto is capable of. The others pulled out of despair thanks to Makoto, but it was their choice to do so.

“But… this world is so huge, and we’re so small. What can we do…? No, we can probably do anything. Yeah! We can do anything!”

#makoto naegi #Danganronpa character analysis #Danganronpa #danganronpa thh #danganronpa future arc #I fucking love Makoto Naegi man. #I think there’s a fine line of nuance to Makoto that’s easy to miss bc he doesn’t really make it known #he’s not a pushover and he’s not overpowered. he’s a people pleaser but he will say what needs to be said #he’s an immovable object and the exact opposite of Junko but he’s also just a normal guy who’s optimistic and (un)lucky #he isn’t invincible but he has immense power to his words the same way Junko did #if anything his superpower is being kind above all else. he’s compassionate to some of the worst people in the world. #he was even conpassionatr to an extent to Junko. he didnt want her to kill herself despite everything she’s done #and he still acknowledges that for years she was a classmate and friend. #I do think the more he learned abt what she did the more he’s come to actually hate her though #post the first game he always refers to her without a suffix to her name which is one of the most subtle rude things you can do #it means you have zero respect for the person you’re referring to #and he speaks about her with some venom he doesn’t use for anyone else in the future arc #he’s not incapable of feeling negative emotions #I really liked the future arc scene bc it showed that Makoto DID experience enough despair to have overcome him if he didn’t refuse #and that it still affects him deeply. people treat him like he’s either this perfect ideal Chad or this baby chick who’s so delicate #and no one really focuses on how makoto shoulders so much and yet is still vulnerable. #honestly that guy was DUE for a mental breakdown even without the tape. it would have happened eventually #I actually wrote one based on him finally hitting a breaking point after giving so much of himself away and keeping nothing for himself #that his issues that he shoves down constantly finally can’t be held down anymore. Hajime helps him bc he knows how that feels #it was a LONG time ago that I wrote that but honestly if I can remember where i was going w it I might finish it #it was initially an rp but I could make it a fic #anyway. the point is Makoto is SO much more complex than people give him credit for #the most fundamental thing about him is that he’s normal and that’s ok! that’s what helps him rise!

[ganondoodle]

back on my zelda thoughts

idk about you but i got sick of zelda running after people with big sorrowful puppy eyes begging them to listen to her(they wont) or to help link in totk pretty fast

#ganondoodles talks #totk spoilers #i just can stop thinking about how dirty she got done #she can be a tragic character without being constantly sad and scared #dare i say she contributed more positive to the game when she was a dragon #the only scenes she didnt look super sad was pretty much when talking about link at the teacup memory bc .. you know she actually knows him #and where shes essentially forced to decide to half kill herself in order to do literally anything for her own time #now that im thinking about it how the heck did anything on the tutorial even work with her giving her powers to you #and you sending the master sword to her #just feels like they scrambled to somehow get you her pwoers and the mastersword to her #some random bubbles of time magic idk lol #if the game went different #wouldnt it have been cool if those had been caused by zelda learning how to reastablish a connection to her own time #creating those weird time bubbles #and through the course of the game you find more and they let you interact with her more and more as shes learning how to use her powers #until at some point she finds a way to return herself #maybe even her spirit as a companion for a time before she gains control of it further #you know so she can actually at least TALK to you #giving her time powers out of nowehre and then not doing anything with it exept send her back in time somehow and time reverse a dagger #like what #wouldnt it just have made more sense when at first she did it unknowningly and then learned how to use it herself #and then .... well travel back again #ham fisted way to introduce a neat lil game gimmick i guess #and nothing more bc how dare she do anything on her own except .. sacrifice herself lol #i guess its meant ot be uwu tragic bc sonia got fridged too quickly for zelda to learn from her or whatever #which is why i said she learns on her own #idk man this game is driving me nuts

[teddybearsims]

you really can't write another song about your broken heart x

[Machines hum and rattle around Jude in agonizing dissonance, like nails on a chalkboard. He just needed to get out a little, cleaning up his apartment had left a sour taste in his mouth.] [The little things he finds have memories swarming the forefront of his mind, like spare arcade tokens, stowed away in his desk drawers.] Stevie: C'mon, one more round? I'll let you win! [An old pair of drum sticks, worn out after years of use. A little 'S' carved crudely on one of them.] Jude: You gotta pick up the sticks first. [Her laughter echoes in the small space. Jude would’ve done anything to make her laugh.] Stevie: Shut up, you dork! I know that. [Crumpled concert tickets, the ink of them wearing away over time.] Stevie: We should've gotten high before we left. Jude: I'll buy us drinks. Stevie: It's a fucking Oasis cover band. I'll need something stronger. [Journal Entry: Jude is attempting to write another song, the lyrics are from the song Look What You’ve Done by Jet. Half of the second verse is scratched out, with the words "FUCK THIS" written next to it. For story purposes, he’s writing these as his own lyrics. ]

#sims 4 #ts4 #simblr #the sims 4 #sim: jude #sim: stevie #YEAH... #story tag #I wanted to use this song for a while.. its just so him.. pls listen to it its so beautiful #was she ever really in love with him #he thinks about that constantly #Jude wanted to please her so bad always #and it ruined them #at least that's how he sees it through his fuzzy memory.. and how nasty the breakup WAS ;-; #tw: alcohol mention #tw: drug mention #gosh I love that first shot of Jude sO much #and I mean.. all pics of Stevie.. #when they'd dated she had long dyed purple hair ;-; #and now its cut short and her roots have grown in #ugh #love her

[forestgreenlesbian]

.

#feel like my relationship with my younger brother is changed completely forever not to be dramatic lol but i am sad #we used to b very close but he has kind of. found his faith again and gone full missionary christian which like. i knew meant the dynamic #was doomed lmao but actually acknowledging it makes me sad i feel like i'm grieving for the friendship we used to have even though #it is literally a me problem i think from his perspective he doesn't think anything has changed. but i feel weird about everything #also his new gf is nineteen and he is. almost 25 and i am the only one who feels weird about it like i know she's over 18 but! idk i can't #tell if i'm being overly cautious or if my gut instinct is right. my sister & her husband have a similar age gap but they met when they wer #both over 30 so like. it didn't feel weird. and i didn't feel comfortable actually seriously talking to him about it apart from the first #time he mentioned her over facetime (he went to another country to do mission stuff & met her there) so like an idiot i've just been #making jokes about the age gap becausee like. thats always been our thing lightly bullying each other lol but he blew up at me and said #i've had nothing positive to say about her since he's been back home and that he thinks i hate her and i'm out of line for constantly #implying he's creepy for dating someone younger. idk i felt like such a freak idiot horrible person about it. it completely blindsided me #bc yes the jokes were coming from a place of idk how i feel about this situation so i'm going to rely on the humour-based communication #we have always fallen back on as a safety thing but i guess i was wrong or the dynamic shifted or something anyway it's all fucked #& everyone is just telling me i feel weird out of some?? misplaced kind of jealousy thing?? because i'm 'losing' my brother to his gf lol #which does not feel right at all he has dated so many other girls and i have never had a problem it is literally the age gap like i haven't #even met this girl i'm sure she's very nice! i just worry about her being nineteen!! jesus. and yes maybe i do feel some resentment around #a brother younger than me who seems to be able to live his life with zero difficulty whilst i'm stuck being this unemployed loser who ruins #literally ever friendship & relationship ive ever had but i think thats ok right like i can't help feeling that. i don't fucking knowwww #am i just projecting all these sad feelings about our friendship dying onto his new relationship or like. am i right to be genuinely #concerned she's six years younger than him and still a fucking teenager!!!!!! i don't know

[aeide-thea]

getting up IS hell and i do legitimately think my body is adhd-typically wired for a later shift, such that getting up is extra hell for me personally

that said, especially with the house to myself for once there's a real pleasure in prying myself out of my oyster bed half-respectably early and absent-mindedly making myself a latte and taking it in with me to sit in the little living room while the light still looks indefinably but definitively like Morning—feels like there's something of a pome in it, only i haven't got words in me about it, exactly, just a deep swept-clean contentment and a cat that's climbed up into my lap again, warm and soft and heavy as love…

#journaling #(look. if you only knew how much catblogging i restrain myself from) #(i don't assert that she's objectively especially special but like. nous nous avons apprivoisés) #(so yes there is a small constantly burbling rivulet of besotted joy in my breast with her name on it‚ like a little tag‚ jingling) #(…also every time i use 'breast' singular i think about all the shaggy breasts in the iliad) #(silly but i guess it's true my στῆθος IS λάσιος insofar as my entire torso is‚ albeit with borrowed wool…) #(also mostly a hairy chest means what you might think—strength in homer‚ coarseness later— #but the LSJ informs me that in a number of authors it was apparently a sign of cunning?? plot stored in the fuzz ig) #(good morning and welcome to K's den of philological factoids…)

[nerime]

my coworkers are being turbo transphobic and literally refuse to listen to answers to questions they fucking ask argh!!! I can just tell you!!! I can just answer you!!!!! I have answers!!! to the ridiculous questions you ask in a mocking way!!!! if you listen for one second I can just fucking explain!!!! 😡😭😡😭

#they ask why would trans men NEED tampons for men since they are WOMEN why cant they juat use WOMEN ones those stupid silly women ugh #they keep coming back to the topic #and im like hey they are not women ^_^ and try to explain the concept #in easy kindergarten terms like hey you know how you wouldnt want to buy pink girly items because you are a (cis) guy! well #and them im cut off with more transphobic shit before i can say anything else #my coworker literally said her son told her and her husband they were playing spin the bottle on a school trip #and she asked so did you kiss any girls? and he said #sure when it landed on a girl then i kissed a girl (implying he also kissed guys) #and she said her husband was so shocked because hes conservative #while she said she just ordered the son not to say anything else #and she tells us 'i think he was just testing us or something' #wtf. i said well okay maybe he was testing your reactions and now hes not gonna tell you shit anymore #and she went like hm 🤔 #also the irony of saying her HUSBAND is conservative while she fucking. misgenders trans men all day and jokes about gay men constantly #in a nasty way #all of them do #im so tired #she complained kids nowadays are so caaual about gay people #and i said okay well i love it personally they should keep it up #and NO ONE at the table supported/agreed with me #sorry i am on a work trip and suffering #transphobia tw #neri stfu