#i wanna be good & low maintenance but i just can't

[beanghostprincess]

I love the sanji and Usopp childhood best friends AU but let me one up this a bit. Robin being usopp's not so legal guardian.

She's in her early 20s she's still on the run and hiding from the government. She runs into the red hair pirates. They hide her on their ship for a while running away from the Marines as well. They really don't know what to do with her at this age she's really not up to being a pirate. Especially on a boat full of men she just met a week ago, they don't know what to do. They're planning on dropping her off at any random village but yasopp had a better idea.

Her name is not Robin. Her name is Ruth, She cut her hair. Maybe dyed it a different color She looks like a completely different person. (They also fake her death. They blew up a navy vessel. They could have executed the plan a little bit better) He takes her to his home and gives her the key.

This is a kind act. A little too kind.......What's the catch? Of course the catch is she has to look after his son. Yasopp has recently been bereaved losing his wife while he was at sea leaving his 7-year-old basically alone for the time being.

(Since yasopp knows that his wife has passed, I'm pretty sure he got Merry or someone in the village to check up on him while he tries to come up with something in the meantime.)

Yasopp: He needs someone to look after him.

Robin: and why isn't it you?

Yasopp: with my bounty? No, not a chance...... Folks recognize me you know my face and once they know It's off to jail for me but you... Ms "Ruth" they don't know you... Which means you can roam around without any worry.

Robin:........

Yasopp: I know this isn't your ideal situation but this is the best we could do. Okay? Look you got a nice house. You can have the master bedroom.... Some of my wife's clothes are still there food, water, Shelter You're set....... All you have to do is just keep Usopp safe..... Say hi buddy don't be scared she's here to watch you..... Come on let go of Daddy's leg..... Say hi to her usopp....

Usopp: no!... I don't wanna.

Robin:...........

Yasopp: *sigh* come here upsy daisy.....God either you're getting heavy or I'm getting old.....*sigh*.....he's a good kid really. Honestly he's very low maintenance just feed him and bathe him and put him to bed at 8.

Robin:........... (Staring)

Usopp:........ (Staring back)

Robin:... Alright...... I'll do it.... I'm truly grateful for this really.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN LOW MAINTENANCE THAT IS A CHILD YASOPP PLEASE SUKFKSDKKJSGNKBFKJD 😭😭😭😭

No, but I absolutely love this. Robin and Usopp bond after a while of Usopp being a bit shy and scared of her. She's like a big sister of some sort, too. He tells her all his stories and speaks about his mom! And Robin also tells him her mom was an incredible person too but also died :( She takes care of him in such a gentle, and loving way. And Usopp is protective of her. Like. A lot. He keeps saying that if anybody dares to come around her he'll just stop them with his powerful slingshot because Captain Usopp will be there to save his dear archeologist! (dude, is this Au just Usopp stealing crew members from Luffy because he found them first? Maybe yes). She tells him her real name and the real reason she's there once he grows up a little bit, and Usopp promises to keep the secret if she stays with him because he really can't lose somebody else. Robin tells him they'll be together for as long as he lets her. She's the most,,, Precious thing. She loves Kaya, too! They spend sooo much time together with Usopp.

And then the whole drama comes because Sanji appears. It's not like Robin is going to fight somebody now that she's safe, but the way the kid speaks when he starts staying over with them (while the crew fixes the ship yadda yadda what I say in the original post) is a bit worrisome,, Sanji grows so fond of her too. He loves her! She reminds him a lot of his mom and finds so much comfort in her. Now, there's this layer of angst because, despite loving each other and having so so much fun together, the three of them can't stay like this forever because Sanji has to go. And Usopp, of course, says no because he's both scared and not ready to do this. But,, But also, he doesn't want to do this to Robin. She's been taking care of him for a long time! And she can't come with them! It'll be dangerous! And Usopp can't leave without her because she promised his dad she'll protect him, and he doesn't want her to get into any trouble. Usopp doesn't tell Sanji, though, he doesn't want to blame Robin for this and make her feel guilty. So he keeps that to himself and watches Sanji go, hoping to reunite someday.

I am guessing that once they meet Luffy, Robin joins them at the same time. If Usopp is going, she's going too. It doesn't matter how dangerous it is, if Usopp wants to fulfill his dream, she doesn't mind a bit of danger. They'll be alright. Then they meet Sanji and everything is pretty much the same except that Robin is there from the start? Her low appreciation for her life is still there, don't worry, Water 7 happens anyway. It's just angstier because Usopp wants to leave and Sanji doesn't want to lose him again, and Enies Lobby is even more dramatic because it's Usopp the one to burn down the flag for his dear Robin! Not to mention that it adds more significance to the Robin/Sanji Wano scene!!

And also, just think about Robin knowing these two teenagers have the biggest crush on each other. It's just so cute.

#sobbing and crying and throwing up #this just makes their bond more personal #and i already like them #sanji and robin are precious to me but robin and usopp in water 7 are something else too #ughhh i luv this thank you #one piece #black leg sanji #usopp #nico robin #sanuso #sanuso childhood bffs au

[skywalkin-in-the-papes]

omg okay! i have delved back into my newsies hyperfixation and have fallen back in love with albert dasilva (specifically livesies' al)! i'm bi, and currently going through the process of an autism diagnosis so i think kinda differently to most people. i love physical affection, but only off specific people - cuddles are a BIG YES. al is so cute agh and i wish he was real.. i also do theatre and my fave animals are cats :)

any thoughts?

Hi!

First off, I am so so so sorry that this is coming out so late. I had a really busy semester and haven't checked my asks in a minute so that's on me. I'm here now though and am in a good spot to answer this.

Also, if it makes you feel better, I have also delved back into the Newsies fandom (not like I ever left) and I am deeply in love with Mush at the moment so I feel ya.

Anyways, without further ado, let's get this thing rolling.

Albert is really supportive of you the entire time during your autism diagnosis. He'll go to the appointments that he can make and that you ask him to come with on.

The two of you tend to think uniquely in regards to the world around you so you guys have a lot to talk about when it comes to the world in general. You share a lot of different thoughts and opinions with each other and just talk about how each of you would like things to be different or what you think of what's going on in the world.

Albert also only likes physical contact with certain people. He's not the biggest on it but once you catch him in a mood where he actually wants snuggles, you can't get that boy to let go of you. He'll just sit on the couch and cuddle you. His arms will be wrapped around your waist and you're pulled into his chest. You hug him as well and there's just cuddles for days.

Even if Race comes in and interrupts, Al still won't let go of you.

Albert himself doesn't do theater but he enjoys going to your various performances and watching you. He likes watching you play all of the different characters up on stage and bring him into another world. He loves listening to all of the different accents you do and will tease you if you slip into one when the two of you are together (regardless of whether you did it on purpose or not. This boy is a TROLL.)

Albert also like cats because they're pretty low maintenance. He doesn't have to give them attention 24/7. Once the two of you marry and have your own place, you get a cat for each of you. Albert's also kind of a dog person but you guys make sure to find a really chill one that gets along well with the cats.

Anyways, I hope this is good. If you have more info you wanna share for more details, feel free to send it over and I'll add to this. I hope this is okay and is kinda what you're thinking.

-Aisling

#ask aisling #asks #newsies ships #newsies asks #newsies movie #livesies #newsies live #albert dasilva ship #albert dasilva #newsies albert

[raphael-angele]

Teen Justice Headcanon Part 11

Might as well start calling me That One Teen Justice Account on Tumblr.

I often headcanon that Klarienne and Troy's relationship is like brother and sister. And Klarienne and Raven have a mutual hatred for each other.

So there are just moments where they glare at each other for simply spending time with Troy.

Example:

Raven: Troy, can you help me with some paperwork about the mission later?

Troy: Aw, sorry, baby. I already promised Klarienne I'd help her give Teekl a bath. And you know how much cats don't like baths

Klarienne: Mhm ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) so it's gonna take some time

Raven: But can't cats clean themselves?

Troy: They can but this is Teekl we're talking about.

Klarienne: I keep him at high maintenance.

Raven: Why would you-

Troy: Why don't you ask Talia for help instead? She's in her office and I'm sure she can help you more than I can.

Raven: ...okay.

Troy: Mkay. I'll see you later, okay? That is, if I survive later. *walks away*

Raven:

Klarienne:

Raven: Seriously?

Klarienne: Well, he's choosing to spend time with me instead of you so, why not?

Raven: That's low, even for you. Two can play at that game.

Klarienne: I'd like to see you try

---

Klarienne: Troy, do you mind driving me to the store? I wanna go buy a few things.

Troy: Hm? Oh, sorry, Klari. Raven's asleep on me and I don't wanna wake him up.

Raven: *sleeping on Troy with his head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat*

Klarienne: You can just leave him on your bed. There are security sensors in the room.

Troy: I don't think that's such a good idea. It's not that I feel like something will happen to him, I just don't want him to wake up and not see me. He's still dealing with some nightmares and I've been his only comfort for it for now. And if he gets a nightmare without me there to calm him down, then all hell breaks loose... literally.

Klarienne: I'm sure you can-

Troy: Klari. I'm not leaving him. Just ask others to drive you. Besides Talia. That girl is talented and very skilled but her driving skills are enough to kill someone

Klarienne: ...Alright. *leaves* it's on, bitch

#dc comics #dc #wonder woman #teen justice #teen titans #young justice #earth 11 #raven #donnarae #gay #klarion #donna troy #klarienne the witch girl #donald troy #troy #wonder girl #troia

[winterpower98]

I had a good day (my godmother made zhajiang noodles!) and I'm finally done planning the outline for "Calabash" and "Macaque" (for the Double Training AU)

Macaque has to make a decision, and of course being the monkey that he is he's going to be dramatic about it. His main grievance with the twins being friends with Mei (and MK by association) is that it's actively putting his sons closer to danger. He has spent centuries trying to stay invisible/ having no name in demon circles and mainly relying on PIF's connections if he needed anything done. The whole "MK" situation has thrown a wrench into those plans. Cause while he tries to stay a no name, being Wukong's ex friend makes him recognizable, it's just no one questioned him til now assuming he was plotting revenge on the down low or something. But now, him not doing anything is actually drawing attention onto himself.

So he did the thing in canon and staged the whole defeating a big demon thing and becomes MK's mentor. (he just doesn't put a draining seal onto him) Than he let's the rumour mill do it's thing while he basically scout out what MK is actually like. It was mainly a "if my sons are going to hang around him, he better know how to keep them alive" thing, but MK is genuinely likable so at that point Macaque just accepted that his days of laying low is over. (at least your kids have friends now, it's ok Mac XD)

Before the training arc concludes though, I wanna say "Calabash happens near the end of MK's training with Macaque.

So the calabash was confiscated back in "Duplicatnation", Macaque is going to return it around now. The twins haven't been showing it but I expect the two to feel on edge? (only now typing it out that I realize I don't know how to describe it oop-) Basically, they on some level feel that Macaque knew they used the calabash (he doesn't) and took it because he doesn't trust the twins with it. While Macaque saw it as taking away their VR pod because he can't really ground them considering they would probably 1. drive him mad while cooped up and 2. Mac's guilty conscience wouldn't allow that with how much he already restricts how much they go out.

After training with MK, Macaque basically decided he should probably be less controlling in his sons' lives, so he returns the calabash and they have a talk over it.

And to show that he's serious about being a bit more "laissez faire", he let's the twins invite his friends over (which he never did before!) and even trusted them to be fine alone and left to run some errands. (so technically this was Mac's fault really)

They invited both Mei and MK over, Mei arrived first and MK was caught up with work for now. So the twins, totally caught up with having someone at their house and a bit lost on how to host may have left Mei alone in their room for a tad too long. Long enough for her to fumble her way into the calabash somehow (eh I'll figure out the details one day) and not knowing the exit commands, she's a bit stuck. The twins find out after panicking a bit before realizing what happened. MK shows up and questions where Mei was, the twins tell him and table the conversation of "why do you have such a thing" and go straight to "how do we get her out,"

Jin and Yin basically looked at each other, "Dad is going to kill us", and then proceeds to send MK into the calabash with Yin. So funny thing with the calabash that I added like a while ago but didn't mention. Since it's a glorified gaming system, the twins made the inside magic proof to avoid having to do maintenance so often (especially with Red playing with them sometimes), the side effect is that glamour is also useless inside, which never posed a problem. Until now that is :D

So MK stumbles into the calabash takes a look at Yin and questions if he bumped his head. He would have probably asked if not for being interrupted by the return of Porty!Clone.

I basically made it so, due to MK's initial clones being so unstable, he had to physically poof them. He never got to Porty so the clone just stuck around in the calabash. YIn and Jin didn't realize cause the gourd was confiscated and MK didn't know because he never saw the clone around so he thought it was dealt with. Mk was however getting slowing drained due to unconsciously maintaining a clone.

So basically, Mei is having major flashbacks and MK is super on edge. They bonk the clone, Yin teaches the exit command. (Which he had to clarify that Jin came up with it! Mei dignified that with a snort, I'd like to think MK would have appreciated the wizard to oz reference but he was too tired)

When they exit the calabash, they are greeted by Jin without glamour (for solidarity!) and MK has a mostly one-sided vent at them. To be fair, the kid has been dealing with a lot of demon attacks, training and work on top of having his energy drained unknowingly due to an issue that the twins technically created. The twins just kinda accepted that they might have blew it, but tries explaining themselves anyways. Mei being the voice of reason on that day just cut their hangout short and was like. "You two, keeping secrets and also almost putting me in danger? Not cool, but also I can see you didn't mean at least half of that so let's just sleep on it. MK? Just sleep in general. I get why you're snippy right now and that's totes valid but you are not 100% right now my dude."

So they basically made a group chat and smoothed things over, MK sent a fruit basket as an "Sorry I immediately assumed you might have endangered my friend on purpose because you're a demon and I was tired" gift, the twins liked it a lot, mostly because Mei is still their friend and MK seems to be open to hanging out more too.

This also happened at some point.

MK: So......is your dad a demon too?

Jin: Oh, we're adopted

(note how that didn't answer the question-)

This all happens towards the end of MK's training with Mac, in which Macaque after deciding he's seen enough challenges MK to a fight as a test. (He hasn't really been training MK that much tbh, but actual tips is better than vague words of wisdom so MK did pick up a few things, also some basic footwork cause Macaque is adamant that he has to be quick on his feet)

Before the fight got anywhere though, Wukong shows up due a mix of noticing MK's new "not taught by Monkey King" footwork and noticing MK's recent fatigue paired with some rumours along the grapevine. The king showing up is basically Macaque's cue to leave, except the fact that Wukong doesn't let him.

Wukong: What are you doing with my successor? Also while we're at it, how are you alive?! You've been alive??

Macaque: Ah yes, my king, how nice of you to visit. I was just interrogating your cub, after all I expect him to be responsible for the safety of my sons. You must know by now if he’s anything like you, he’s a magnet for trouble, and believe me from what I've seen? He's a lot like you.

Wukong: Your SONS??!!

MK: His cub?

Macaque: Well I said what I said, oh and MK?

MK: ......Yeah?

Macaque: If you ever need to apologise to my sons again, lay off the peaches, they like persimmons.

And he proceeds to put on his human glamour, not explain anything and dips like the dramatic theatre kid he is.

MK(probably 10 minutes later): Macaque is MR. LIU??????

Wukong is not fairing any better and MK is interogating the twins in the groupchat.

If you're wonder where Mac stands now, he is neutral unless his boys are threatened. (So more or less on MK's side tbh)

-💙

(Drawing was sent with another ask)

Mac needed to re-appear in the demon world and he decided that if he had to do that, he will do it in his style Which is as dramatic as possible

Good for him

Macaque really took one step forward and two behind, uh? My guy your sons are disasters, why did you leave them alone with Wukong's successor how does that not spell trouble for you (And I think "on edge" is the best way to describe what the twins were feeling)

And getting out by clicking your heels is a wonderful idea, don't smack talk your brother Yin.

Also, I can just imagine Jin's big brother instincts starting to tingle when MK starts to vent

But Wukong is having so many emotions during his encounter with Macaque! He didn't question him calling MK his son, but Macaque having sons!??! And being alive!?!?! My guy is not going to sleep tonight

#lego monkie kid #lego monkie kid au #monkie kid #monkie kid au #double training au #winter answer #winterpower98

[linaselandbasil]

Ooookay, since I had to archive lock all my works on ao3 I realized that a lot of you wouldn't be able to read Sneaky Date Night without my kinda annoying commentary, so here it is:

@slowiedrakie hey bestie~

Sneaky Date Night-uncursed version

Lance/unspecified female self insert, tw for alcohol and sex I guess, they use protection tho.

The full moon cast a pale veil of ghostly light over the night and a cold breeze caressed her skin as she leaned out of her window. It's the middle of the night and she's bored as could be.

This is one of many occasions when she simply cannot sleep. Theres not much to do aside from looking out of her head like there's noone home but the lights are on.

She sighed, maybe she should go for a walk... She stood up and went to put on socks and shoes, then she gave it a second thought and decided to wear a sweater too.

She went to close her windows but at the last minute someone pushed it open and jumped in.

"Hey bitch." Lance said. "Awake at this hour? And I thought I would get to wake you up myself."

She sighed. "Good evening to you too."

He came closer, inspecting her from behind his mask as he circled around her like a wolf. "Going somewhere?" He stopped behind her, putting his arms on her shoulders.

Despite the darkness of her room, she could see just enough of him in the mirror in front of them. The mask didn't take from his charm, not even a little.

"I can't sleep, thought I would go for a walk."

"In that? I love your confidence." She pushed his hands off and turned around to glare at him. "So where are we going?"

She chuckled, she can't believe this dude. "You can't just invite yourself!" She sat on her bed and looked at him. "It's not like you can just walk around with me like you're a normal person."

"Trust me, I'm so good at hiding that noone will know I'm even there. Not even you bitch!" He sat next to her and got comfortable.

"That's weird."

"Could be weirder. So where are we going?"

"Cherry tree, maybe?"

He scoffed. "Boring! Let's go to the archives!" He got up and threw her over his shoulder. She hit his back a couple of times, trying not to wake her neighbors with her laughter.

Lance, like the gentleman he was, gave her a little warning to close her mouth before jumping out the window. Regardless of that, she screamed in fear.

"Shh!" He said, putting her on her feet. "You don't wanna get caught with me, do you?"

She had a pitiable expression. "Sorry."

"Hmm." He took her by the hand and started walking on the maintenance trail. It's for the gardeners. "Ever been to my super secret private enterance?"

"I don't think I did!" She smiled softly, he can't see it because he's looking at where he's going, but he can hear it in her voice. "Do you take all your dates there?"

"Yes."

"And I thought I was special. You're such a Heartbreaker!" He laughed.

"You know, everyone is special in their own way, so really none of us are. It cancels out." He abruptly stopped on a very uninteresting point in the trail next to a tree and looked up.

"What is it?"

"We're here, I'm just trying to figure out how to get you in there." He pointed at a window several meters above the ground. "Don't worry darling, I've got this."

He swept her off her feet and climbed the tree. She's not pleased, but she'll take it.

He set her down on a branch and jumped over to open the window. How he did it is a mystery to her. He's got magic fingers for sure.

The window silently opened, like he sneakily greased the hinges to make his job easier. He turned around, grabbed her and pulled her in like a sack of salt. She yelped, but she wasn't even hurt.

"What a gentleman you are, throwing me around like I'm-" He covered her mouth with his hand, the smell of his tinted leather glove is so nice.

"Shhh, don't speak." He whispered. After a few seconds he removed his hand. "Or at least keep it low."

"Sorry."

He closed the window with one hand, not looking away. She blushed under his piercing gaze, because I just remembered that I was supposed to be building up to something.

"Wh-whats this place?" She looked around at the shelves. The moonlight bathed the room in a ghostly glow.

"The archives, dumbass." He put his hand on her waist and pushed her back against one of the shelves.

She felt like she was burning up. He ominously chuckled at her as her brain melted into a horny mush and left her to do what he came here for.

To fuck shit up.

He took a couple of scrolls and put them back in the wrong place, completely ruining the alphabetical order they were arranged in. He literally pulled a drawer out completely and swapped it with a different one. He took the books off and put them back with their spine facing inwards. That was noone will instantly know which one they need.

He's a fucking menace, I would not want to be his enemy.

She just looked at him as he worked like an artist, watching him walk all over the tile floor without making a sound. She didn't dare move from where he left her. Noisy shoes, y'know.

He spotted a calendar on the wall and took a pencil from the pencil mug to write IMPORTANT! DONT FORGET! into a day several month away from now. He probably had a cheeky grin on his face too.

He threw the pencil behind him and put his hand on his hips to inspect his work as it rolled away into the dark abyss.

"Okay I'm finished, we can go."

She couldn't help but laugh. "Did you seriously come here to do that?" She asked, hands covering her mouth to conceal her smile.

"Hey, this is important work! Who else is gonna do this? Fucking nobody!" They both laughed, trying to keep it as quiet as possible. "Let's go darling."

He helped her jump out and closed the window. You would never be able to tell that anyone broke in through there.

"Cherry tree?"

"You just can't get enough of me, can you sweetheart? Alright, let's go." She gladly held onto his arm and walked back on the trail with him.

They walked past her still open window and sadly, they had to let go of each other because she didn't want to sneak around in the bushes. She has walkway privileges and she's not afraid to use them.

She comfortably sat down on a bench as her outlaw acquaintance laid down in a flowerbed. The big round leaves camouflaged him surprisingly well.

"So, you still dating him?" Lance asked. There's no better occasion for getting to know each other than a spontaneous late night outing. I would know it, it's my favorite time to make my friends cry about things they didn't even know they were sad about.

"I never broke up with him, but I think we're pretty much over. I haven't talked to him since."

"Alright... Good."

"Good? Why do you care?" She turned around and looked at him. He's barely more than a dark patch in the dim moonlit night.

"You deserve better."

"...Why did you come into my room anyway?" She hugged herself a little tighter, it's cold.

"To see you, obviously. With the way the guard treats you, every night could be my last chance for it."

"Wow, you care about me that much? I'm flattered." He laughed a little. Voice deep and raspy, he's so lovely. Every taste of him that she can get is sweeter than the last.

Ugh, she's pathetic. He literally just laughed and she's horny... Foreshadowing? What do you mean I'm foreshadowing? What is even foreshadowing? I'm not foreshad-

She pulled her knees up to her chest, hugging them. They staid quiet for a while.

The crickets, some nocturnal animals, the breeze, the footsteps of patrolling guards. It's a peaceful night.

"I'm bored." She said.

"Fuckin' told you it would be." He stood up, dusting himself off. "I know a place, let's go get drunk!" He took her by her hands and pulled her up. He went back to sneaking in the bushes as she walked on the pavement like a normal person would.

The place turned out to be the pantry in HQ.

He told her to wait outside in the music garden -or whatever it's called, I hate that frikin place- as he scaled the wall and climbed in through a window that looked about two sizes too small. It worked though. He came out with a bottle of wine, holding it one hand and climbing off like he's a frikin spider.

"Won't they notice it missing? It's going to be very suspicious if a bottle of wine gets stolen and I wake up hungover the next day. "

"Don't worry, I came and hid it like two weeks ago." He said, gently caressing her face. "Maybe I was planning to take you out for a while."

She got closer, wrapping her arms around his neck and looking into the rich red eyes of his mask. "How romantic."

"So, your place or mine? I have some cookies hidden somewhere near your room, if you're hungry." He put his free arm around her waist.

"Mine, I want cookies! it's probably a lot closer!"

He chuckled. "You just can't wait, can you?"

They went back towards her room, luckily there weren't any guards there at the time so this literal felon just marched in like he owned the place. As they walked down the hall of guards Lance suddenly left her side to hide behind a pillar and before she could even ask what this was for, Nevra appeared in front of her. He walks as quietly as a cat. Lance hates that about him, even if he literally does the same exact thing.

"Hey." He looked at her, unsure of what to say.

"Hey..." She wasn't very happy about seeing him. This is the first time they've been eye to eye since the potion incident.

"Why are you awake this late at night?" He asked.

"Why does it matter to you?" She crossed her arms.

"I just... I know you're still mad at me, but that doesn't stop me from worrying about you. It can be dangerous at night."

"Well, rest assured, I'm not in any sort of danger."

He walked past her, but he turned back after a few steps.

"What were you doing anyway? You have work tomorrow!"

"I was on a date, if you must know it so badly!" She said, nearly yelling in anger. He looked surprised, maybe a little offended that he'd be left behind so fast, like a bump in the road.

"A-alright.. Goodnight."

"Goodnight." She walked away with an angry expression on her face. Lance appeared behind her, manifesting from thin air as it appeared to her. "You almost scared me so much I screamed!" She whispered and gently hit him in the arm.

"That's not so surprising, since you are in so much danger right now! At any moment a horrible criminal could grab you-" He wrapped his free arm around her neck. "And eat you whole." She giggled, taking her keys out.

He let her go to open her door. Soon as they were in, he put the bottle on her desk and took his mask off.

"So like... Is this a date?" She asked.

The first time she saw his face tonight was just timed correctly that he had the purest, most genuine look of 'are you fucking serious?' expression.

"Yeah, it is. If you want it to be... I assume you do." He put his mask on the table and began undoing his shoulderguards.

"I do." She sat on her bed and observed as he removed his armor.

"I got the cookies while you were talking to Nevra. It was fun to look at him when you told him that you went on a date!" He threw a paper baggie on the bed. He picked the bottle up and pulled the cork out with his teeth.

"I don't have any glasses I'm afraid." He sat down besides her.

"Who needs glasses? Cut out the middle man!" He put an arm around her. "Ladies first~"

"What a gentleman!" She accepted the bottle and took a small sip. "Wow... uh. It's... it's alcohol."

He laughed, taking the bottle. "Not a big drinker, are you sweetheart?" He took a significantly bigger sip.

"Not really. I don't really see why people find it fun."

"Yet, here you are." She leaned into his side, sighing.

"This is a special occasion... And you worked hard to steal this fine bottle of wine, just for me, I wouldn't want to let you down like that!" They laughed. "Where are the cookies?"

"Here." He gave her the baggie and she wiggled her legs in excitement as she opened it up.

In an hour or so, the cookies were all gone and the bottle got corked back up for now. Lance didn't know how low her alcohol tolerance would be and for once in his entire life he decided not to take a risk.

She took her sweater a while ago. She felt hot. Was it the wine, or was it the man in her bed kissing her shoulder and singing her praises? We might never find out.

She kicked her boots off and gave Lance her best bedroom eyes. "Will this horrible criminal come to take me oooor?" He didn't need to be told twice. He gently took her face in his hands and kissed her. "I'm not made of sugar."

"Oh I know." He grabbed her by her neck and pushed her down to the bed. "Sorry for trying to be nice. Maybe you just like assholes and that's why you let me be around you."

"Hehe, maybe~ Ah!!" He bit her ear. "Oh no! I'm being eaten! Someone save me from this horrible man!" She giggled as he kissed her neck. "Wait, we should keep quiet. The walls are thin here."

"I'm not trying to please anyone outside of this room, love." He said it in a low voice.

"My neighbor likes to gossip you know... I just do don't want to be the talk of the town."

"Ah, I see. As you wish." He straightened up and took his shirt off. "Your turn." She smiled at him and wiggled out of all of her clothes except for her socks and panties. "Isssthiiis why they call it liquid courage?" She asked, purposefully falling into his arms.

"Pretty much."

"Why are you clothed, my dear?" She asked twirling her hair. (Im sorry for all of you bald besties, I'm trying keep her as nondescript as possible but we gotta have the hair twirl)

"I have my hands full with you." He pushed her off his lap, letting her roll on her mattress. He stood up and unbuttoned his pants. Before he pushed them down he glanced at his date.

Naturally, she was gawking.

"Wanna do the honors?"

"Nah, I'm good. I'm fine with you doing most of the work." She propped herself up on her elbows and looked at him with half closed eyes.

"You little- I took you out, I fed you cookies, I got you drunk, wasn't this enough?" He laughed and playfully shoved her legs, since that was the closest to him.

"Hehehe, noooo! Evil man is being meeeaan!" She pulled his head closer and kissed him. He pushed his pants down, kicking them to to the side. "Yaaaaaaay, pebiiiiiis!" She screamed really quietly.

"Pebis." He repeated, pulling her closer to the edge of the bed then kneeling down.

"Shut uuup!" She was laughing really hard and trying to stay quiet, whatever had her in such a funny mood, Lance was thankful for it, since this could have been a lot more awkward.

"Don't worry I plan on using my mouth for something more fun." He said before kissing her navel.

"You're mM..mmM.making me blush! Ah!" He bit her on her thigh, she hit him on his head for it.

"Shhh, stay quiet!" He went right back to work, putting her thighs on his shoulders and kissing the spot he just bit.

"Isss not like I'm not trying." His fingers dipped into the soft fatty flesh, holding onto her so he would stay grounded despite how drunken with wine and desire he is. He cannot fuck this up, he's supposed to be a gentleman now.... Ignore his earlier behavior.

He looked at her as he slid his fingers under her panties. She cannot help but feel like she was that window he opened earlier, she laughed and covered her face because that's so funny and she's so tipsy. Lance couldn't help but laugh too.

"What are you laughing about??" She asked.

"I'm laughing because you're laughing! Stop!" He used this as an opportunity to move a little further from her and fully pulled her panties off. If she's laughing she can't be embarrassed.

"Sorry!"

"It's fine." Her fingers found their way into his hair and scratched his scalp in the most seductive manner.

He kissed her where her thigh met her hips. "I'm a little nervous. Don't stop though! I'm just saying!" He chuckled, bringing one of his hands closer to her.

"Ah~" She pulled on his hair.

"You alright?" He asked with an absolutely despicable grin on his face as he kept on gently rubbing the skin on the clitoral hood.

"I-I'm alright!" She said with a death grip on his hair. It hurt but he's very much into it.

"Not too sensitive?" He asked with a playful tone, moving his thumb to the clit.

She gasped. "A little..."

"But you're enjoying it, right?" He pressed down, gently of course. He's not a barbarian.

"I'm going to beat you up."

"Ma'am, you are the size of my thumb."

"Didn't you say you would use your mouth for something else?"

"You're so right, I did say that." He removed his finger and licked it clean. He put her thighs back on his shoulder and gave her a little kiss on her thigh.

"You've never even kissed my mouth that many times."

"Stop complaining." He went back and licked the clit and she felt one of his beautiful hands caress her side. He's not doing much, but she's still a little sensitive.

She's getting used to it though, he can tell because her grip on his hair is gradually getting less painful. Her legs wrapped around his neck when he began lightly sucking on it.

If he could, he would probably make a comment about the noises she's making right now. And she wanted to keep quiet. How funny.

He pulled his hand down from her hip bone, making her get goosebumps all over. He lifted his head up and looked at her, putting two fingers into his mouth.

"Little loud, aren't you." With feather light strokes, he began working a finger into her.

"I- I'm. Yo- uuhhh." He smirked. The bastard was very happy with his work.....

"Didn't you say that we should be quiet?" He asked like he's not the one fingering her.

It's quite apparent that he was planning this date, since he's freshly shaven and his nails are all filled down.

"Asshole!" He chuckled and went back to using his mouth for something that she didn't find annoying. He went slower this time, because he just has to be a little mean in some way. The tease. "Y'know, you could go a little harder~"

He looked at her, she looked at him.

"Don't make me regret saying that." She said with laboured breathing. He raised his brows, inching his hand closer.

She grabbed a pillow and hugged it on her chest so she doesn't have to see his infuriatingly satisfied expression. Ugh, he's so annoying. But he's so good with his tounge. She was trying to not wake her neighbors up, but her care to do so was diminishing by the second.

"You, come here." She said after a short moment. He looked at her, puzzled. "Yeah, you." She reached down and pulled him closer by the hair. He immediately went for a sweet kiss. "Put it in, studmuffin." She spread her legs under him.

They broke out in hysterical laughter, barely keeping the noise under control. Her eyes teared up and she could barely see him in the moonlit room. He was holding his face in his hands, looking like he was in pain. Well, he was, in a way.

"Studmuffin?"

"Are you going to fuck me or not?"

"You need help, you're feral." He climbed off the bed and went to get his pants. She turned on her stomach and looked at his nicely sculpted everything as he bent over to pick it up.

"Oh yeah? Well, you need to go to jail too, you're the most jailworthy person I know. It's like we were made for each other!" He pulled something out of his back pocket. "Whass that?"

"My cigarettes." He opened the little metal box and pulled two condoms out. "Choose one."

She took the left one. "You smoke? I didn't know I was on a date with a bad boy~"

"Get over yourself." He put the box next to the wine. "Gimme." He opened it up.

"Yaay! Peebiiiis!" She grabbed her pillow and screamed into it with overflowing excitement.

"You're going to wake the whole HQ up."

"Peeebiis!..." She whisper screamed less loudly. "Could you open the bottle?" She went to grab it from the nightstand while he put the catsuit on the snake.

"You sure? You seem drunk enough... You still have socks on." She looked down and whispered 'shit' before getting them off.

"Ugh, okay." She climbed into his lap. "Alright, let's do this before i run out of courage." He put his arms around her and they kissed. The light breeze made the curtains dance and blew a chill into the room. They don't feel cold at all though.

Their hands vandered over each other, leaving phantom burns on their skin. When they were completely covered by these loving brands, they wordlessly agreed that it was time.

"You do it." She said.

"Hmm?"

"I'm lazy, I don't want to be on top." He pushed her over, he's a little rough. He's not selfish when he warms a bed, but he has an appetite still. It's not like she minds being tossed around like a toy, it kind of feels like an amusement ride.

He interlocked their fingers and began moving. He's barely thinking at this point, but the last bit of his mind he loses is the one that cares about how she feels, so he's not breaking the bed exactly.

There's nowhere to hide from his piercing gaze, she cannot cover her mouth to keep the moans from escaping. "Faster." She asked, whispering in an almost questioning tone. Like she didn't know if she really wanted or needed it... Or if he would listen.

Well, he did, making the bed whine and creak under them. "Didn't you want to keep it low?" He moved his hand to cover her mouth, she got a lot louder with the change of pace. Her now free right hand went to grip his wrist.

"Hm-hmm!" Her legs wrapped around him, holding on as hard as she could. She was a little dizzy and drunk. He groaned and slowed down.

He slowed down even more, moving his hand to her throat.

"Oh, that's kinky."

He smirked at her, she pulled him down for a kiss before continuing. He went harder, he's a bit deranged at this point. Every time she got a bit too noisy for his liking, he tightened his grip on her throat. It solved the 'problem'.

At one point her other hand was freed from his unyielding hold and she reached down to help out with the task of pleasing herself. The other one was on his shoulder, her fingers are hurting from holding on so hard.

He was methodical in his ways, as he always is. It didn't take long to get her where she wanted to be. He followed soon after.

They staid there for a few seconds, catching their breath. He let go of her neck and laid down next to her.

"Thrash bin?"

"Whu..?"

"Nevermind I see it." He threw the condom away and got a tissue from the desk. She keeps them around because she cries all the time.

"Ew."

"What, it wasn't disgusting when it was inside you just a few seconds ago?" He laid down next to her, she immediately threw her leg over him so he wouldn't try to escape.

"We should do this more."

"Alright. But next time we go somewhere without neighbors. Wanna make you scream."

"Alright... I need to pee. I'll be right back." She got up and went to find her clothes. She would kill to have her own bathroom. "Ugh, I'm so sweaty too, I need to take a shower."

"How romantic. We should have stopped at the wine if you hate being sweaty, sometimes the squeeze ain't worth the juice." They laughed. I imagine sex to be quite underwhelming as you can see. "I should get going before sunrise." He got up and went to get dressed too.

"Where did you hide the wine?" She was done assembling her quite simple outfit and she sat down at her desk.

"Why do you ask?"

"It was cold when you opened it. I didn't know you had a whole fridge hidden somewhere."

"What's a fridge? You know what, nevermind." He bent down to kiss her before climbing on the windowsill.

"Bye asshole!"

"Bye bitch!"

She chuckled to herself as she closed the window, this was a night to remember. She went to grab her toiletries before going to the shower and noticed that he forgot his cigarette box.

Good, that means he'll come back sooner.

She left to go shower and start her day. She didn't have an ounce of sleep and she's still kind of drunk so it's gonna be interesting.

...

#eldarya #lance eldarya #eldarya lance #eldarya the origins #my first smut fic #eldarya fanfiction

[disco-elysium-via-polls]

3. "Hep. Yeah, when were you last tested?"

CINDY THE SKULL - "Had a battery of tests just last week. I'm practically a patchwork of interesting critters. Kind of like a man o' war." Despite the attitude, she puts the brush aside.

SUGGESTION [Medium: Success] - She's grown frustrated with her work and welcomes the opportunity to challenge authority in other ways.

"You keep looking off to the side -- what are you looking at?"

"What are you doing to the wall?"

"Do you know anything about the recent murder?"

"Catch you later, Cindy." [Leave.]

CINDY THE SKULL - She nods disdainfully toward the woman performing maintenance on the boat docked next to the pier.

COMPOSURE [Easy: Success] - Hatred? Disgust? It's difficult to tell which of the two is more present in her girlish features.

JOYCE MESSIER - The woman on the boat does not notice her staring.

CINDY THE SKULL - She hisses: "That Ozonne whore. *Someone's* gotta keep an eye on her."

"Who is she?"

KIM KITSURAGI - "Probably the Wild Pines rep. We should talk to her." He nods in her direction. "She's a professional negotiator, though. I have the feeling she will be very cooperative -- while telling us nothing."

"You should take the lead, ask her unexpected questions -- you know, do your thing. Don't be afraid to get a bit *wacky*. Throwing her off is our best bet."

CINDY THE SKULL - "Good idea, piggies. Run along now, fuck her shit up good. Impound that boat while you're at it. I'd like to watch her *swim* back to Ozonne."

2. "What are you doing to the wall?"

CINDY THE SKULL - "Can't you tell? I'm painting a beautiful mural. An aero-graffito visible from low orbit..."

"I haven't really started it yet. I'm waiting for the right words." She studies the wall, suddenly pensive.

"So you don't know what to write?"

"Why are you so committed to defacing the building?"

"I have an opinion on this -- wanna hear it?" (Proceed.)

CINDY THE SKULL - "Have you ever tried your hand at graffito? When faced with a blank wall, most people write unimaginative stuff like *Pigs Go Home* and *Mona was here*."

"We rarely see pigs 'round here, though, just Union cads -- and my name's not Mona, so..."

EMPATHY [Medium: Success] - She wants it to be something true -- and *total*.

2. "Why are you so committed to defacing the building?"

CINDY THE SKULL - "This place is severely lacking in havoc. Not even the occasional trash can fire to break up the tedium."

"I thought I'd mix it up, you know, summon the forces of crime and social chaos -- with a wall-sized invitation."

3. "I have an opinion on this -- wanna hear it?" (Proceed.)

#disco elysium #cindy the skull #kim kitsuragi

[purple-beans]

I posted 19,866 times in 2022

15 posts created (0%)

19,851 posts reblogged (100%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@there-is-pie-in-the-fridge

@elesh-nussy

@agentduckorico

@nonbinary-bosmer

@loth-catgirl

I tagged 278 of my posts in 2022

#okay but - 5 posts

#also - 5 posts

#prev tags - 4 posts

#eat the rich - 3 posts

#i mean - 3 posts

#superyacht - 2 posts

#the netherlands - 2 posts

#okay but like - 2 posts

#but like - 2 posts

#that's it - 2 posts

Longest Tag: 138 characters

#now i dont know if this is gonna be translations but honestly even if im getting a bunch of emails in fucking latin ill be happy as can be

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

I just finished Gideon the Ninth and well, she's just gone then? Dead and scooped up into Harrow as an infinite death-juice battery?

9 notes - Posted November 8, 2022

#4

Hey Outer Wilds Tumblr. I need some help.

I've had EotE since the moment it came out. But I just can't, for the life of me, get through those sections. You know the ones. As soon as I get to them, my anxiety just goes. Through the roof. And I just, really want to do this. I wanna experience it, for myself. But I don't know how..

30 notes - Posted March 22, 2022

#3

Waterparks still makes good music you guys are just mean

49 notes - Posted July 10, 2022

#2

Well I just finished reading Iron Widow and I would like to recap my thoughts as uhhh,

Holy Shit

64 notes - Posted July 17, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

So here's a fun fact. Jeff Bezos is having a new superyacht built by the Dutch yacht builder Oceanco. Just behind Rotterdam. This yacht is a massive, 400-something feet sailing monstrosity. Three massive masts. And now Oceanco has been located in that same spot for years right. They know exactly what the restrictions are, how high all the bridges between them and the North Sea are.

One of these bridges is the Koningshavenbrug, colloquially known as "De Hef" (the Lift). De Hef is a former railway bridge over the Port of Rotterdam, which today is out of use but stands there as a "Rijksmonument", a state monument. This means that this bridge can't just be demolished or altered, because it's well, a monument for a part of Rotterdam's past.

De Hef is also, too low for Jeff Bezos' new toy. So, going against what the city of Rotterdam said in the past, namely that the bridge would never again be dismantled, they're going to dismantle the bridge. Just temporarily mind you, under the guise of "maintenance". Because they can't alter the bridge. Because it's a monument.

But hey if you're the richest man in the world, I guess you can just buy your way to having a monument dismantled in order to have your boat pass by.

TL;DR: Jeff Bezos ordered a boat a company who knows the height of these bridges. This company designed a boat that's bigger than the bridges. They're now tearing a bridge down just for Bezos' boat.

Source: English. Dutch.

412 notes - Posted February 2, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

[acalculatedfuture]

☕️ I got a general probably unpopular opinion regarding muses and their characterizations. I feel like lots of muns are too focused on one of two things.

1. Wanting to make their Muses usually justified in every action, wether good or bad, so they always seem somewhat in the right.

2. Making their muses REALLY sadistic and slapping on extra bad traits just to keep adding shock factor after shock factor.

Both of these scenarios kinda go roundabout and gives some characters Joker vibes where no matter how they act they are somewhat justified in each and every interaction to invoke some kind of sympathy, even if the action from a general standpoint is really bad.

send me a ☕️ and an opinion (popular or unpopular) and i’ll say whether i agree or disagree

I ranted about similar topics in the past so this is definitely something I agree with, I think there's an overall lack of nuance that makes people think there's only one way to write a hero or a villain to the point where if you write a villain that doesn't act completely unhinged and cross several lines just for shits and giggles they won't be taken seriously and if you write a hero with actual negative traits that makes mistakes and questionable actions they're seen as a gimmick

Like yeah I occasionally like to go along with jokes about my Touya being the evil one but sometimes it just seems really dismissive like his flaws mean he can't be held on the same level as other Unova protags

And because of that I feel like there's only one flaw that can be given to muses that are supposed to be read as sympathetic and it's that they give too much of themselves for others and never talk about their problems so they can live in heroic martyrdom and avoid burdening people which like can be written as a flaw but it never really is because the way it's normally written is basically just my muse's only negative trait is that they're too nice and low-maintenance and that ends up being a positive trait disguised as a negative one, especially since the only real negative aspect that gets acknowledged is that this would make the muse in question less willing to assert themselves which conveniently goes away when that would make them seem weak

It's not a trait that can't be done well and I even have a few ideas about how this could genuinely hinder a character, maybe they grow resentful because they feel like they're not allowed to voice their own issues maybe they get burned out because they're living other people's ambitions instead of their own, maybe they try too hard to act like nothing bothers them that it gives the impression that they can't take anything seriously, maybe they're not hiding their issues that well and instead come across as pointlessly gloomy due to their lack of communication, maybe they try to take care of other people's problems even when it's not needed because that's how they assume things work and come across as condescending, there's SO MUCH that can be done

And the funny thing about the usual approach with this trope is that I feel like it gives muses a flaw that the mun doesn't actually want, where they seem like they want to make everyone around them feel guilty and only bring up their issues in a backhanded way in order to make people uncomfortable and then back out when they're actually offered help so that they don't lose that narrative, which is completely unintentional but also a lot worse

As for villains I feel like the thing here is that people don't want to write with villains, they want their snappy comebacks and cool fight scenes and to come out on top no matter what (and also to write smut with them but that's a whole other issue), so if you take the time to go in depth about your evil muse's characterization only a handful of people are gonna bother reading it so the more sympathetic traits end up getting phased out due to a lack of use, but also let's not act like hero muns are bullies and villain muns are victims, sometimes people just wanna write edgy characters and that's perfectly fine u n l e s s it's one of those cases where the edge mostly comes from ableist stereotypes like I was talking a few days ago about how there's this whole trope with low empathy basically being equated with a muse being a serial killer and while you can have a low empathy character that's evil because I think that any trope can be done well with enough respect and research there's also the fact that if a character's entire reason to be written as evil is being neurodivergent there's something very sus going on

As for how to break out of that stereotype for villains it's really not hard you don't have to make them sympathetic or secretly nice or anything you just need to keep in mind what kind of personality they'd have when they don't have anything evil to do, a really good example of this would be @vivalavillain and his Archer since he's really evil with very few redeeming traits but you can still see him interacting with people normally outside of his Team Rocket duties and being outright likable without being any less of a villain

#anon #ooc #meme reply #amano's cursed opinion of the day

[tiredassmage]

Tyr as a Companion

I'd do a whole series of my ocs in this, but I have too many to contain in one post, so I'll pick away at these piece by piece, lol.

Selection:

Reporting!

By your lead.

Something I can do for you?

Yes? What's next?

Battle Lines:

I'll cover you!

Mind your step.

Well, if you insist!

Never see us coming!

Exiting Battle:

Are you alright?

Guess they won't learn, eh?

So indelicate. Their loss.

KO'ed/Low Health

Could use a hand here!

That wasn't... quite to plan.

In the end.., I know my purpose...

Resurrected

Forgive me. I fear I failed you.

I owe you one. Or three. Drinks later?

Trust me, it never gets more fun.

Misc. Click Lines

Was there something else?

"Nine" will still suffice. Intelligence may be lost, but I remain.

What? Sorry. Implants have been acting up. Might need some adjustments.

[Alderaan-specific] It's beautiful here, isn't it? I almost wouldn't mind settling down here, if it wasn't for... everything. Can't imagine it'd be too hard to get lost in these mountains...

[Saboteur/Republic-specific] You know, I don't think I ever thanked you properly. There was a time I thought I'd never escape... Just... thanks.

Worried who you were talking with? Ha! I'll take that as a compliment.

We should get back to work. There's always plenty of it.

Gifts

Military Gear, Weapon [favorite]: What, for me? Truly? I... Thank you. I'll put it to good use.

Maintenance, Underworld Good, Technology [love]: Wow, incredible! Where did you get this?

Imperial Memorabilia, Courting, Republic Memorabilia [like]: Very thoughtful of you.

Cultural Artifact, Trophy, Delicacies, Luxury [indifferent]: If that be your wish, I'm... sure I can find a use for it.

Likes: Pragmatism, respect, professionalism, playing to strengths, staying true to ideals and policies

Dislikes: Sith power plays and politics, senseless violence, mind control, collateral damage in operations, rigid loyalty to authority

This was a fun thinking exercise! I found this in the tags this morning and simply thought it was fun and I will hopefully torture myself by doing more ocs eventually, bUT for now, a short break.

Also, all my potential swtor mutuals I am staring at you with heart eyes, if you wanna do this, consider this your tag, lol.

#swtor #ch: tyr #swtor ocs as companions

[milkybonya]

Hi Milky!! I hope you had a nice day today 🥰 I'm graduating in just a few hours! I can't believe it 😭😭 me?? A college graduate?? Sounds fake 😭 but it sounds extra fake because I'm taking an extra year to pursue a certificate so I'll be at the same school taking undergraduate classes with kids 2-3 years younger than me 😭 But idk I'm really excited because my mom is coming to see me today for graduation 🥰 I missed her a lot! I've been making origami for her as stress relief and I'm going to be giving it to her today! I'm not the artistic child in the family so I'm sure it'll mean a lot that I tried for her.

Things have been going really well recently by the way! Finishing up classes and resting for the last few days has been nice. I still have to do work for my internship/second job idk what to call it lol but it's been low maintenance and I can do the work when I want (it's remote!). I'm sure things will pick up on Monday when I start classes but I've been practicing a lot of self care that I hope will carry forward into the summer! Even though I've had a lot going on, my mood has been fantastic. Writing to Kingdom I think has helped a lot. They are all so nice 🥺 Seeing them cheer my posts on Weverse occasionally really goes a long way. Even tho not much has changed since March when I was really going through it, I'm doing much better so idk we love that 🥰

I hope things are going well for you in Korea! Astro on the 28th ahhh have fun!! I don't follow Astro but they seem like very sweet and talented boys so I'm sure it'll be a great experience 🥰🤩 and studying at the YG Cafe?? Hello that sounds so cool! I can't believe you saw a flash of Yoshi 🥺 I can't imagine just hanging out where idols might be coming and going! If you're willing to share, I'd love to hear your favorite part about being in Korea! I'm sure it's hard to choose just one, but if you wanna tell me about a couple, I'd love to hear 🥰

And I just saw your post about writing a blurb for moots' birthdays. You're so sweet 😭🥺 My ult is Baekhyun but idk I feel like I'd rather read for Arthur 🥺 He's climbing up my ult chart very quickly. My birthday is March 21 :) so it's just a little far away lol I haven't been on Tumblr a lot recently (but I have your post notifs on so I always come check when I see you're posting) but I need to continue reading your Treasure drabbles. The ones I read were so cute 🥺🥺 You have such a sweet writing style. It always makes me so happy.

And I'm glad you laughed at my delulu edit LOL everytime I would look at it I started dying laughing. Like I'm so embarrassed I actually made that but I actually did such a good job?? Considering I have like no experience with photo ending I'm happy lol I actually sent it to Arthur on the fancafe a couple days ago 😭 They aren't active on there anymore but they still check the posts so he didn't comment on it but I can only imagine he is laughing at me. As he should tho, it was so silly lol

I hope you have a nice weekend! 💙

omg graduating in a few hours?! you must be graduated by now then, congratulations my love!!! ♡ i'm so proud of you, you did so well... ♡ and hey, even if you're going back to school after and with kids younger than you, that's okay! age is not important, but doing things you love is !

i hope you had a lovely time and with your mom too 💟 i hope she loved the origami!! i didn't know you can do origami :O that's so cool! what kinds of things do you make ?!

i'm so happy you've been getting rest ^^ i hope you're able to keep up the self care ! and that your internship and new classes go well :O you're doing so much omg i'm insanely proud! and so glad to hear things are well :") to be doing better despite things remaining the same is honestly so powerful ❣️

yes omg astro this weekend.. they dropped their new album too and i love it a lot >_< especially my bias, Jinjin, his solo !

i actually... fully saw ikon coming out of their cars and going into the building it was so insane ! seriously being there near where treasure and other yg artists are gives me so much energy T-T

omg my favourite part of korea?? it definitely is hard to choose but i think it's in the small things?? like how good the public transit is, how well-mannered and polite everyone is, the fact that cute cafés are everywhere, the food!! i don't really enjoy cooking so being able to eat out healthily for cheap is such a blessing T-T and omg the convenience stores !!! i love that there's a river near my house, too.. i go for runs there a lot ! oops i listed so many things T-T

i'll be adding your birthday--!!

i can't believe you have my post notifs on aHH you're so sweet i'll cry,,, 😭

seriously your edit made me die for a good 5 minutes hehe so i can only imagine Arthur must've died too!! i'm so glad you sent it to him but it's a shame they aren't so active :( it would be funny to see what he says !

i hope you have a lovely week up ahead 💟

#yutopiada talks #baekhyuns lipchain ;3; #beloved kelsey ♡ #milky's moots

[acrodites]

harris

you must have enjoyed your time searching and flirting and scrolling through pretty girls hahaha and then you found me. right there on your screen featuring a dating app they called cmb. right there where i am, with the picts of me wearing a white tanktop smiling. Tell you what, that's my best picts and the flirtiest i've ever looked. i'm not that whatever you thought from that photo of me.

i'm so much more. and you can't handle it, you didn't. you chose to walk away. you blocked me on instagram, and unblocked it again, you undo our friendship, or should i label it, situationship. i don't know what's on your mind, truly. and i refuse to assume things, until now. 1. you found another girl 2. you just can't bare watching my stories being happy without including you 3. you have different thoughts about me 4. you were, like you told me, feel small and insecure about how rich my life is 5. or you just done with me.

and then you told me, you felt insecure. of course you didn't straight up talking to me, you replied to my text. i hope you can read my sadness and anger and disappointment in those long ass paragraphs. i was thinking about it over and over before decided to low myself down and give you those paragraphs.

i hated myself for that. you made me hate that version of me. it's on you that attract the side of me i avoided these august of knowing you. i didn't wanna be like that. i want to attract, not chase. but i demanded answer, that day. i can't be left with no clue.

and now it's been eleven days. since we had our last talk through whatsapp. what a coward. you could have called me for the last time explaining why you pulled away instead of giving me texts of feeling "minder".

i would never date a coward.

but i wanted to date you.

you were kind, you listen. you were handsome, i wouldn't change an inch of your body, your bones are perfect and i wanted to call it home. but it's not. its a shell. its a fucking shell. that's all you are.

sick minded boy. you are no man. you're coward. you have a patriarchy belief. i knew it the second you told me not to get close to guys. but then you left me. just what the hell.

i was again thinking, was i not pretty enough? was i not smart enough? (but this one i think you like stupid girl more) was i not wise enough?

doesn't matter. the trash took itself out is the term i'm handling. you decided to erase me from your life that easy, no no, you decided to exit my life because you couldn't handle me being this much.

go. find. less. i don't care, i have never been this careless to any guy i had a crush on. i regret thinking i might get a chance of having a future with you. what a douche. You go do your thing, being a police officer or whatever job you actually do. while keep searching for a girl that you demand to be underneath you.

i will be a doctor, nevertheless. i will be happy, i will be rich, of everything. i will be loved. and i will never be enough for you.

tell you what, i will always be too much so you can go find less. i will always be too high maintenance for someone with such a low effort like you. i will always deserve the kind of love i'm giving to other. too pretty, too smart, too rich, too loved.

let me show you how out of your league, i am. you can never afford me.

thankyou.

(p.s. i dont buy your reason of being insecure but i just gonna go with it because it makes me feel good about myself and bad about you. You might fuck with another girl but guess what? its none of my business because i dont have time for your sick mind)

[voidandnull404]

Hey I saw a rb of yours about having mental health struggles and I try to send people resources when I think they could use them soo: You'll benefit from looking at them right away, but you can also save them on your desktop and schedule yourself or give yourself reminders to use them. Even chipping away at them bit by bit is good.

https://integralguide.com/%E2%AD%90%EF%B8%8F+Start+Here/About - A great wiki and tree/CYOA format guide and resource for treating things like anxiety, trauma, CPTSD, depression, ADHD and OCD, and for improving overall wellbeing. If nothing else, read the short intro because it demonstrates what it is.

Mental Health Resource List https://drive.google.com/file/d/1jbAxPB8QKG3NLUKNZB8h1fNUjzcXaNrZ/view - Problem, minority and area specific international resources.

https://www.therapistaid.com/ - Accessible mental health and therapy education, resources and worksheets.

https://www.verywellmind.com/about-explanatory-styles-3145110 - A very short read but very useful.

https://positivepsychology.com/mental-health-exercises-interventions - A good in-depth guide and overview for treating and managing anxiety and depression and their symptoms, with references and links to other resources.

Mental health apps like Wysa and Sanvello - Accessible and low effort, recommend to use alongside other resources.

https://socialwork.buffalo.edu/resources/self-care-starter-kit/developing-your-self-care-plan.html - Functional, kind, well-communicated and succinct resource for taking care of yourself and all your needs, both long-term and in crisis.

https://socialwork.buffalo.edu/resources/self-care-starter-kit/self-care-assessments-exercises/exercises-and-activities.html - Guidance on resting and relaxing effectively, time management, physical health, lifestyle and mental health maintenance.

https://socialwork.buffalo.edu/resources/self-care-starter-kit/additional-self-care-resources/developing-your-support-system.html - Once again practical, kind and wise guidance and tips for how to find, develop and maintain a comprehensive support system and what to avoid.

Books by Babette Rothschild, particularly 8 Keys to Safe Trauma Recovery - She's a therapist with experience with mental illness (including PTSD) and her books contain much of the same therapy and education you get in a therapist's office - they're very well written, informative, accessible and gentle and if you can't afford buying you can get them from online or physical libraries.

And last but not least - seriously pursue therapy or other help if you're not doing so already! You should try googling "[country/city/county/state] (health condition/circumstance/demographic) (financial/medical/therapy) [aid/assistance/program/services/benefits/discount]" or similar to find help or guidance - there's a lot of help out there but a lot of it is just obscure and underadvertised.

Anon this is very sweet and I appreciate the resources and all but I genuinely dont know where u saw I was struggling with mental health stuff?? I haven't reblogged or wrote anything like that in months?? I wanna post the ask for other but fr what are u referencing 😅

#the devil speaks #like thank u but huh???? #mental health resources

[messybouquetoflilies]

i'm exhausted

#today felt so shitty for no reason #i feel so insecure #and i really don't know why #i've been doing so good lately #idk i guess some days are just shit #i hate that it makes me feel extra lonely though #like why is it all i want to run to someone.. tell them all my tiny problems.. and cry a little in their arms #that feels so obnoxious #i get so needy and i feel overbearing #i wanna be good & low maintenance but i just can't #hhhhhh and now i'm just rambling #but this is my public diary damnit #i will do what i please #i wanna feel cared for and appreciated #somedayyyy #and dw im fine #just moody

[cyborg-franky]

One Piece Characters Reactions To S/O In Their Clothes

Ace - He has no idea how he misplaced his hat when the thing is glued to him. - Ace looks everywhere for his hat, getting annoyed and frustrated with the disappearance. - How can you misplace something that bright orange? - When he busts into Marco's office he see's you filling out paperwork. - Wearing his hat - Looks big on you, you blink at the disruption and turn to see him. - Normally he gets annoyed when people wear his hat. - You though? you look really cute in it. - He stammers, gets a look from Marco and you for busting into the office then forgetting what he had to say. - He itches his cheek and feels the heat rise to his face. - "Nothing, ah you look cute in my hat" He mumbles, catching the doctor roll his eyes at him. - You grin brightly at him and tip his hat in thanks.

Marco - We think Marco has more then one shirt, we hope he does, he just has this one purple shirt that's his favorite. - He can't find it when he wakes up, he even washed it the other day. - Looking around he catches sight of it, outside his window, on you. - Marco resigns to wearing another slightly less dramatic shade and steps out. - You turn to face your boyfriend with a grin. - The shirt is huge on you, so long. - You have the sleeves rolled up all the way to your elbows, the fabric comes down low, he admires how you look in his shirt a moment more before allowing himself to speak. - "Morning" You hum and tug him towards you. - "I was looking for that" He says as he pulls you into his arms, admiring the sunrise with you in his arms. - "Yeah, I was out of cleans shirts..." You laugh, you can tell he's rolling his eyes. - "I wanna see you in nothing but my shirt later, yoi"

Thatch - He'd been out in the sunshine instead of in the kitchen for once. - Had taken off his scarf, set it down somewhere, loosened his shirt, the weather was hot today and he'd been asked to help with some other duties. - Coming back he couldn't find it, he sighed, he had others but that was his best one. - "You look lost Thatch" he turned to see you heading his way, his scarf either loosely around your own neck or being used as a bandanna in your hair. - "I know your a pirate but don't steal from a poor old man" He laughed when you cocked your head to the side wondering what he was going on about. - "Oh this?" You tugged at the yellow and he nodded. - "I knew you'd loose it when I saw it left there, plus I missed you today" You felt a little sheepish for admitting that. - Thatch just chuckled and pulled you against him for a hug, while taking it back.

Izou - He had hundreds of hair accessorizes, he surely wouldn't notice one missing right? you'd wanted something of his to make you feel closer to the commander when he was busy. - He noticed it was gone and he knew he wasn't the type to just loose things. - He was in a bad mood, people got out his way, ducked and dodged when they saw his beautifully painted, irritated face. - Izou was about to accuse Thatch, knowing the chef often needed pins and combs for the maintenance of his own hair. - You managed to intercept him with a happy greeting. - "You look handsome today my love!" You said with a smile, he opened and closed his mouth, disarmed by the compliment. - He then saw what he'd been missing in your hair.. - His bad mood faded, he sighed inwardly. - "That looks good on you, but you wear it like this" he gently took it from your hair, setting it back in neatly, such care and affection "You look wonderful" TAG LIST: @aifozu @undercoverweeeb @slut4animedilfs @acesmarigold @sanjithesimp @fire-fist-ann @dxvilmanlev @secretsnailor @rivvd-art @angeltani @mimi-ya @simp4ace @rosiinante @childofblackmaria

#marco the pheonix #marco the phoenix #one piece x reader #one piece x you #one piece reader insert #portgas d ace #sfw #portgas d. ace #headcannons #whitebeard crew #whitebeard pirates #izo #izou #thatch #fire fist ace #fushichou marco #marco x you #marco x reader #marco x yn #izou x you #izou x marco #izou x reader #izo x you #izo x reader #thatch x you #thatch x reader #portgas d ace x reader #marco the pheonix x reader #gender neutral reader

[linaselandbasil]

GUYS THE PORN IS HERE! COME GET YA'LL JUICE!

Sneaky date night (cursed version with directors commentary)

(tw for alcohol and spelling mistakes)

The full moon cast a pale veil of ghostly light over the night and a cold breeze caressed her skin as she leaned out of her window. It's the middle of the night and she's bored as could be.

There's a version without the () parts on ao3

...

This is one of many occasions when she simply cannot sleep. There's not much to do aside from looking out of her head like there's no one home but the lights are on.

She sighed, maybe she should go for a walk... She stood up and went to put on socks and shoes, then she gave it a second thought and decided to wear a sweater too.

She went to close her windows but at the last minute someone pushed it open and jumped in.

"Hey bitch." Lance said. "Awake at this hour? And I thought I would get to wake you up myself."

She sighed. "Good evening to you too."

He came closer, inspecting her from behind his mask as he circled around her like a wolf. "Going somewhere?" He stopped behind her, putting his arms on her shoulders.

Despite the darkness of her room, she could see just enough of him in the mirror in front of them. The mask didn't take from his charm, not even a little.

"I can't sleep, thought I would go for a walk."

"In that? I love your confidence." She pushed his hands off and turned around to glare at him. "So where are we going?"

She chuckled, she can't believe this dude. "You can't just invite yourself!" She sat on her bed and looked at him. "It's not like you can just walk around with me like you're a normal person."

"Trust me, I'm so good at hiding that no one will know I'm even there. Not even you bitch!" He sat next to her and got comfortable.

"That's weird."

"Could be weirder. So where are we going?"

"Cherry tree, maybe?"

He scoffed. "Boring! Let's go to the archives!" He got up and threw her over his shoulder. She hit his back a couple of times, trying not to wake her neighbours with her laughter.

Lance, like the gentleman he was, gave her a little warning to close her mouth before jumping out the window. Regardless of that, she screamed in fear.

"Shh!" He said, putting her on her feet. "You don't wanna get caught with me, do you?"

She had a pitiable expression. "Sorry."

"Hmm." He took her by the hand and started walking on the maintenance trail. It's for the gardeners. "Ever been to my super secret private enterance?"

"I don't think I did!" She smiled softly, he can't see it because he's looking at where he's going, but he can hear it in her voice. "Do you take all your dates there?"

"Yes."

"And I thought I was special. You're such a heartbreaker!" He laughed.

"You know, everyone is special in their own way, so really none of us are. It cancels out." He abruptly stopped on a very uninteresting point in the trail next to a tree and looked up.

"What is it?"

"We're here, I'm just trying to figure out how to get you in there." He pointed at a window several meters above the ground. "Don't worry darling, I've got this."

He swept her off her feet and climbed the tree. She's not pleased, but she'll take it.

He set her down on a branch and jumped over to open the window. How he did it is a mystery to her. He's got magic fingers for sure.

The window silently opened, like he sneakily greased the hinges to make his job easier. He turned around, grabbed her and pulled her in like a sack of salt. She yelped, but she wasn't even hurt.

"What a gentleman you are, throwing me around like I'm-" He covered her mouth with his hand, the smell of his tinted leather glove is so nice.

"Shhh, don't speak." He whispered. After a few seconds he removed his hand. "Or at least keep it low."

"Sorry."

He closed the window with one hand, not looking away. She blushed under his piercing gaze, because I just remembered that I was supposed to be building up to something.

"Wh-whats this place?" She looked around at the shelves. The moonlight bathed the room in a ghostly glow.

"The archives, dumbass." He put his hand on her waist and pushed her back against one of the shelves.

She felt like she was burning up. He ominously chuckled at her as her brain melted into a horny mush and left her to do what he came here for.

To fuck shit up.

He took a couple of scrolls and put them back in the wrong place, completely ruining the alphabetical order they were arranged in. He literally pulled a drawer out completely and swapped it with a different one. He took the books off and put them back with their spine facing inwards. That was no one will instantly know which one they need.

He's a fucking menace, I would not want to be his enemy.

She just looked at him as he worked like an artist, watching him walk all over the tile floor without making a sound. She didn't dare move from where he left her. Noisy shoes, y'know.

He spotted a calendar on the wall and took a pencil from the pencil mug to write IMPORTANT! DON'T FORGET! into a day several month away from now. He probably had a cheeky grin on his face too.

He threw the pencil behind him and put his hand on his hips to inspect his work as it rolled away into the dark abyss.

"Okay I'm finished, we can go."

She couldn't help but laugh. "Did you seriously come here to do that?" She asked, hands covering her mouth to conceal her smile.

"Hey, this is important work! Who else is gonna do this? Fucking nobody!" They both laughed, trying to keep it as quiet as possible. "Let's go darling."

He helped her jump out and closed the window. You would never be able to tell that anyone broke in through there.

"Cherry tree?"

"You just can't get enough of me, can you sweetheart? Alright, let's go." She gladly held onto his arm and walked back on the trail with him.

They walked past her still open window and sadly, they had to let go of each other because she didn't want to sneak around in the bushes. She has walkway privileges and she's not afraid to use them.

She comfortably sat down on a bench as her outlaw acquaintance laid down in a flowerbed. The big round leaves camouflaged him surprisingly well.

"So, you still dating him?" Lance asked. There's no better occasion for getting to know each other than a spontaneous late night outing. I would know it, it's my favourite time to make my friends cry about things they didn't even know they were sad about.

"I never broke up with him, but I think we're pretty much over. I haven't talked to him since."

"Alright... Good."

"Good? Why do you care?" She turned around and looked at him. He's barely more than a dark patch in the dim moonlit night.

"You deserve better."

"...Why did you come into my room anyway?" She hugged herself a little tighter, it's cold.

"To see you, obviously. With the way the guard treats you, every night could be my last chance for it."

"Wow, you care about me that much? I'm flattered." He laughed a little. Voice deep and raspy, he's so lovely. Every taste of him that she can get is sweeter than the last.

Ugh, she's pathetic. He literally just laughed and she's horny... Foreshadowing? What do you mean I'm foreshadowing? What is even foreshadowing? I'm not foreshad-

She pulled her knees up to her chest, hugging them. They staid quiet for a while.

The crickets, some nocturnal animals, the breeze, the footsteps of patrolling guards. It's a peaceful night.

"I'm bored." She said.

"Fuckin' told you it would be." He stood up, dusting himself off. "I know a place, let's go get drunk!" He took her by her hands and pulled her up. He went back to sneaking in the bushes as she walked on the pavement like a normal person would.

The place turned out to be the pantry in HQ.

He told her to wait outside in the music garden -or whatever it's called, I hate that frikin place- as he scaled the wall and climbed in through a window that looked about two sizes too small. It worked though. He came out with a bottle of wine, holding it one hand and climbing off like he's a frikin spider.

"Won't they notice it missing? It's going to be very suspicious if a bottle of wine gets stolen and I wake up hungover the next day. "

"Don't worry, I came and hid it like two weeks ago." He said, gently caressing her face. "Maybe I was planning to take you out for a while."

She got closer, wrapping her arms around his neck and looking into the rich red eyes of his mask. "How romantic."

"So, your place or mine? I have some cookies hidden somewhere near your room, if you're hungry." He put his free arm around her waist.

"Mine, I want cookies! it's probably a lot closer!"

He chuckled. "You just can't wait, can you?"

They went back towards her room, luckily there weren't any guards there at the time so this literal felon just marched in like he owned the place. As they walked down the hall of guards Lance suddenly left her side to hide behind a pillar and before she could even ask what this was for, Nevra appeared in front of her. He walks as quietly as a cat. Lance hates that about him, even if he literally does the same exact thing.

"Hey." He looked at her, unsure of what to say.

"Hey..." She wasn't very happy about seeing him. This is the first time they've been eye to eye since the potion incident.

"Why are you awake this late at night?" He asked.

"Why does it matter to you?" She crossed her arms.

"I just... I know you're still mad at me, but that doesn't stop me from worrying about you. It can be dangerous at night."

"Well, rest assured, I'm not in any sort of danger."

He walked past her, but he turned back after a few steps.

"What were you doing anyway? You have work tomorrow!"

"I was on a date, if you must know it so badly!" She said, nearly yelling in anger. He looked surprised, maybe a little offended that he'd be left behind so fast, like a bump in the road.

"A-alright.. Goodnight."

"Goodnight." She walked away with an angry expression on her face. Lance appeared behind her, manifesting from thin air as it appeared to her. "You almost scared me so much I screamed!" She whispered and gently hit him in the arm.

"That's not so surprising, since you are in so much danger right now! At any moment a horrible criminal could grab you-" He wrapped his free arm around her neck. "And eat you whole." She giggled, taking her keys out.

He let her go to open her door. Soon as they were in, he put the bottle on her desk and took his mask off.

"So like... Is this a date?" She asked.

The first time she saw his face tonight was just timed correctly that he had the purest, most genuine look of 'are you fucking serious?' expression.

"Yeah, it is. If you want it to be... I assume you do." He put his mask on the table and began undoing his shoulder guards.

"I do." She sat on her bed and observed as he removed his armour.

"I got the cookies while you were talking to Nevra. It was fun to look at him when you told him that you went on a date!" He threw a paper baggie on the bed. He picked the bottle up and pulled the cork out with his teeth.

"I don't have any glasses I'm afraid." He sat down besides her.

"Who needs glasses? Cut out the middle man!" He put an arm around her. "Ladies first~"

"What a gentleman!" She accepted the bottle and took a small sip. "Wow... uh. It's... it's alcohol."

He laughed, taking the bottle. "Not a big drinker, are you sweetheart?" He took a significantly bigger sip.

"Not really. I don't really see why people find it fun."

"Yet, here you are." She leaned into his side, sighing.

"This is a special occasion... And you worked hard to steal this fine bottle of wine, just for me, I wouldn't want to let you down like that!" They laughed. "Where are the cookies?"

"Here." He gave her the baggie and she wiggled her legs in excitement as she opened it up.

In an hour or so, the cookies were all gone and the bottle got corked back up for now. Lance didn't know how low her alcohol tolerance would be and for once in his entire life he decided not to take a risk.

She took her sweater a while ago. She felt hot. Was it the wine, or was it the man in her bed kissing her shoulder and singing her praises? We might never find out.

She kicked her boots off and gave Lance her best bedroom eyes. "Will this horrible criminal come to take me oooor?" He didn't need to be told twice. He gently took her face in his hands and kissed her. "I'm not made of sugar."

"Oh I know." He grabbed her by her neck and pushed her down to the bed. "Sorry for trying to be nice. Maybe you just like assholes and that's why you let me be around you."

"Hehe, maybe~ Ah!!" He bit her ear. "Oh no! I'm being eaten! Someone save me from this horrible man!" She giggled as he kissed her neck. "Wait, we should keep quiet. The walls are thin here."

"I'm not trying to please anyone outside of this room, love." He said it in a low voice.

"My neighbour likes to gossip you know... I just do don't want to be the talk of the town."

"Ah, I see. As you wish." He straightened up and took his shirt off. "Your turn." She smiled at him and wiggled out of all of her clothes except for her socks and panties. "Isssthiiis why they call it liquid courage?" She asked, purposefully falling into his arms.

"Pretty much."

"Why are you clothed, my dear?" She asked twirling her hair. (I'm sorry for all of you bald besties, I'm trying keep her as nondescript as possible but we gotta have the hair twirl)

"I have my hands full with you." He pushed her off his lap, letting her roll on her mattress. He stood up and unbuttoned his pants. Before he pushed them down he glanced at his date.

Naturally, she was gawking.

"Wanna do the honours?"

"Nah, I'm good. I'm fine with you doing most of the work." She propped herself up on her elbows and looked at him with half closed eyes.

"You little- I took you out, I fed you cookies, I got you drunk, wasn't this enough?" He laughed and playfully shoved her legs, since that was the closest to him.

"Hehehe, noooo! Evil man is being meeeaan!" She pulled his head closer and kissed him. He pushed his pants down, kicking them to to the side. "Yaaaaaaay, pebiiiiiis!" She screamed really quietly.

"Pebis." He repeated, pulling her closer to the edge of the bed then kneeling down.

"Shut uuup!" She was laughing really hard and trying to stay quiet, whatever had her in such a funny mood, Lance was thankful for it, since this could have been a lot more awkward.

"Don't worry I plan on using my mouth for something more fun." He said before kissing her navel.

"You're mM..mmM.making me blush! Ah!" He bit her on her thigh, she hit him on his head for it.

"Shhh, stay quiet!" He went right back to work, putting her thighs on his shoulders and kissing the spot he just bit.

"Isss not like I'm not trying." His fingers dipped into the soft fatty flesh, holding onto her so he would stay grounded despite how drunken with wine and desire he is. He cannot fuck this up, he's supposed to be a gentleman now.... Ignore his earlier behaviour.

He looked at her as he slid his fingers under her panties. She cannot help but feel like she was that window he opened earlier, she laughed and covered her face because that's so funny and she's so tipsy. Lance couldn't help but laugh too.

"What are you laughing about??" She asked.

"I'm laughing because you're laughing! Stop!" He used this as an opportunity to move a little further from her and fully pulled her panties off. If she's laughing she can't be embarrassed.

"Sorry!"

"It's fine." Her fingers found their way into his hair and scratched his scalp in the most seductive manner. (Imagine that as you will, I wrote it down because I thought it sounded funny even if it's weird and im not removing it.)

He kissed her where her thigh met her hips, where did he get all this patience from? From me, I've never eaten pussy before and I'm scared! Ahaahaaahfgyffokff

"I'm a little nervous. Don't stop though! I'm just saying!" He chuckled, bringing one of his hands closer to- to the- I'm going to see myself out, thanks for having me but I'll be jumping out the window.

NO I HAVE TO DO THIS, IM ALREADY SO INVESTED!

HE BROUGHT HIS HANDS CLOSER TO HER VAGINA *dies* I hate that word

"Ah~" She pulled on his hair.

"You alright?" He asked with an absolutely despicable grin on his face as he kept on gently rubbing the skin on the clitoral hood. (Eww.... I'm so sorry but I'm a biology student and an ubernerd Im gonna use a lot of scientific language)

"I-I'm alright!" She said with a death grip on his hair. It hurt but he's very much into it.

"Not too sensitive?" He asked with a playful tone, moving his thumb to the clit.

She gasped. "A little..."

"But you're enjoying it, right?" He pressed down, gently of course. He's not a barbarian.

"I'm going to beat you up."

"Ma'am, you are the size of my thumb."

"Didn't you say you would use your mouth for something else?"

"You're so right, I did say that." He removed his finger and licked it clean. He put her thighs back on his shoulder and gave her a little kiss on her thigh.

"You've never even kissed my mouth that many times."

"Stop complaining." He went back and licked -I already feel disgusting, I need to be thrown into jail, I want to crawl out of my skin aaaaa- the clit and she felt one of his beautiful hands caress her side. He's not doing much, but she's still a little sensitive.

She's getting used to it though, he can tell because her grip on his hair is gradually getting less painful. Her legs wrapped around his neck when he began lightly sucking on it.

If he could, he would probably make a comment about the noises she's making right now. And she wanted to keep quiet. How funny.

He pulled his hand down from her hip bone, making her get goosebumps all over. He lifted his head up and looked at her, putting two fingers into his mouth.

"Little loud, aren't you." With feather light strokes, he began working a finger into her.

"I- I'm. Yo- uuhhh." He smirked. The bastard was very happy with his work.....

"Didn't you say that we should be quiet?" (I cannot stand myself right now. I have no shame, I am a man of science who knows that there's nothing to feel bad about when it comes to sex. Yet here I am, being a little bitch about not wanting to spell out what he's doing, like I'm not already a social outcast for every other reason imaginable) Sooooo anyway, he's fingering her.

It's quite apparent that he was planning this date, since he's freshly shaven and his nails are all filled down. This is the most sexy thing anyone can do, make sure you declaw yourself before fingering someone.

"Asshole!" He chuckled and went back to using his mouth for something that she didn't find annoying. He went slower this time, because he just has to be a little mean in some way. The tease. "Y'know, you could go a little harder~"

He looked at her, she looked at him.

"Don't make me regret saying that." She said with laboured breathing. He raised his brows, inching his hand closer.

She grabbed a pillow and hugged it on her chest so she doesn't have to see his infuriatingly satisfied expression. Ugh, he's so annoying. But he's so good with his tounge.... .mmmmmMmMMmmmM *turns into a microwave* She was trying to not wake her neighbours up, but her care to do so was diminishing by the second.

"You, come here." She said after a short moment. He looked at her, puzzled. "Yeah, you." She reached down and pulled him closer by the hair. He immediately went for a sweet kiss. "Put it in, studmuffin." She spread her legs under him.

They broke out in hysterical laughter, barely keeping the noise under control. Her eyes teared up and she could barely see him in the moonlit room. He was holding his face in his hands, looking like he was in pain. Well, he was, in a way.

"Studmuffin?"

"Are you going to fuck me or not?"

"You need help, you're feral." He climbed off the bed and went to get his pants. She turned on her stomach and looked at his nicely sculpted everything as he bent over to pick it up.

"Oh yeah? Well, you need to go to jail too, you're the most jailworthy person I know. It's like we were made for each other!" He pulled something out of his back pocket. "Whass that?"

"My cigarettes." He opened the little metal box and pulled two condoms out. "Choose one."

She took the left one. "You smoke? I didn't know I was on a date with a bad boy~"

"Get over yourself." He put the box next to the wine. "Gimme." He opened it up.

"Yaay! Peebiiiis!" She grabbed her pillow and screamed into it with overflowing excitement.

"You're going to wake the whole HQ up."

"Peeebiis!..." She whisper screamed less loudly. "Could you open the bottle?" She went to grab it from the nightstand while he put the catsuit on the snake.

"You sure? You seem drunk enough... You still have socks on." She looked down and whispered 'shit' before getting them off.

"Ugh, okay." She climbed into his lap. "Alright, let's do this before i run out of courage." He put his arms around her and they kissed. The light breeze made the curtains dance and blew a chill into the room. They don't feel cold at all though.

Their hands wandered over each other, leaving phantom burns on their skin. When they were completely covered by these loving brands, they wordlessly agreed that it was time.

"You do it." She said.

"Hmm?"

"I'm lazy, I don't want to be on top." He pushed her over, he's a little rough. He's not selfish when he warms a bed, but he has an appetite still. It's not like she minds being tossed around like a toy, it kind of feels like an amusement ride.

He interlocked their fingers and began moving. He's barely thinking at this point, but the last bit of his mind he loses is the one that cares about how she feels, so he's not breaking the bed exactly.

There's nowhere to hide from his piercing gaze, she cannot cover her mouth to keep the moans from escaping. "Faster." She asked, whispering in an almost questioning tone. Like she didn't know if she really wanted or needed it... Or if he would listen.

Well, he did, making the bed whine and creak under them. "Didn't you want to keep it low?" He moved his hand to cover her mouth, she got a lot louder with the change of pace. Her now free right hand went to grip his wrist.

"Hm-hmm!" Her legs wrapped around him, holding on as hard as she could. She was a little dizzy, drunk and currently being shaken like a can of whipped cream. He grunted (like when you get hit in a video game) and slowed down.

He slowed down even more, moving his hand to her throat.

"Oh, that's kinky."

He smirked at her, she pulled him down for a kiss before continuing. He went harder, he's a bit deranged at this point. Every time she got a bit too noisy for his liking, he tightened his grip on her throat. It solved the 'problem'.

At one point her other hand was freed from his unyielding hold and she reached down to help out with the task of pleasing herself. The other one was on his shoulder, her fingers are hurting from holding on so hard.

He was methodical in his ways, as he always is. It didn't take long to get her where she wanted to be. He followed soon after. (Listen I will not write this down. I find the word 'cum' funny... I cannot be horny in these conditions)

They staid there for a few seconds, catching their breath. He let go of her neck and laid down next to her.

"Thrash bin?"

"Whu..?"

"Nevermind I see it." He threw the condom away and got a tissue from the desk. She keeps them around because she cries all the time.

"Ew."

"What, it wasn't disgusting when it was inside you just a few seconds ago?" He laid down next to her, she immediately threw her leg over him so he wouldn't try to escape.

"We should do this more."

"Alright. But next time we go somewhere without neighbours. Wanna make you scream."

"Alright... I need to pee. I'll be right back." She got up and went to find her clothes. She would kill to have her own bathroom. "Ugh, I'm so sweaty too, I need to take a shower."

"How romantic. We should have stopped at the wine if you hate being sweaty, sometimes the squeeze ain't worth the juice." They laughed. I imagine sex to be quite underwhelming as you can see.

"I should get going before sunrise." He got up and went to get dressed too.

"Where did you hide the wine?" She was done assembling her quite simple outfit and she sat down at her desk.

"Why do you ask?"

"It was cold when you opened it. I didn't know you had a whole fridge hidden somewhere."

"What's a fridge? You know what, nevermind." He bent down to kiss her before climbing on the windowsill.

"Bye asshole!"

"Bye bitch!"

She chuckled to herself as she closed the window, this was a night to remember. She went to grab her toiletries before going to the shower and noticed that he forgot his cigarette box.

Good, that means he'll come back sooner.

She left to go shower and start her day. She didn't have an ounce of sleep and she's still kind of drunk so it's gonna be interesting.

...

#eldarya #lance eldarya #unhinged #fanfiction #smut #my first smut fic #eldarya lance origins #eldarya lance fanfiction

[angy-mouse]

Fancy Like by Walker Hayes

@sisnap gave me the green light to write a bunch of countrynap songfics so buckle up cowfolk yeehaw

Ayy

My girl is bangin'

She's so low maintenance

Don't need no champagne poppin' entertainment

Take her to Wendy's

Can't keep her off me

She wanna dip me like them fries in her Frosty

“Come on, sugar,” Sapnap whined. You just giggled from the middle seat, takeout bag forgotten on the passengers you rubbed your boyfriend over his tight jeans. “While I’m driving, really?”

“I just wanna say ‘thank you,’” you insisted, pressing a little kiss to the base of his neck. “My sweet man making sure I’m fed on his break.”

“Speaking of,” he grunted out, clearing his throat as you squeezed him. “I gotta be back in fifteen. I gotta eat, baby, and as sweet as you are-”

“Eat,” you insisted, feeding him a fry and following it with a peck to his lips. You licked the salt off your lips with a smile. “I can eat when you go back, right now I wanna make sure you get to relax on your break.”

He growled, pulling into a parking space that provided the most privacy and clapping his hand down on your thigh. He pulled you into a rough kiss, only pulling away when the salty flavor on his tongue was replaced by your cherry chapstick. “What the hell did I do to deserve you,” he marvelled as he helped you undo his belt.

But every now and then when I get paid

I gotta spoil my baby with an upgrade (ayy)

Ayy, ayy, ayy

You skipped over to your phone as it rang out your boyfriend’s ringtone, quickly picking it up since he was supposed to be at work. “Hey, baby!”

You heard him chuckle at your eager voice. “Hey, darlin’, how you doin’?”

You flopped back on your bed with a sigh. “Booored. I’m home alone while my hunky boyfriend works hard to pay our bills.”

“Well that is just a shame, isn’t it, sugar? Do I need to pick up some extra shifts so we can hire a poolboy for you to play with while I’m gone?”

“But we don’t have a pool,”

“Perfect, he should be able to give you all the attention you need,” he chirped, delighting in your giggles. “Listen, baby, I just got my check so I want you to get ready for when I come home. You wear that cute little sundress I love so much and we’ll go out for a nice dinner, alright?”

You hummed, running to your closet. “The blue one?”

You laughed as he made a noise like he’d been punched. “You’re killin’ me, darlin’,”

“Alright, alright, I’ll wear the orange sundress and those strappy sandals you like, sound good, daddy?”

He made a small, blissful noise of approval. “That sounds perfect, princess, I can’t wait to see you tonight.”

Yeah, we fancy like Applebee's on a date night

Got that Bourbon Street steak with the Oreo shake

Get some whipped cream on the top too

Two straws, one check, girl, I got you

You patiently waited for Sapnap to put his truck in park and come around to your side- you knew better than to try opening your door yourself. “Hey, pretty girl,” he purred with a grin, pulling you into his arms and giving you a sweet kiss. “You look gorgeous, sugar,” he told you, pulling back to twirl you around.

“Thank you, daddy,” you chirped with a giggle as you finished your twirl and moved to grip the collar of his button-up, the top her buttons undone to show the top few curls of chest hair. “Did you really change in your truck?”

The sheepish grin and light blush that covered his face told you the answer. “Come on, darlin’, I gotta try to look like I have a chance with you. Can’t have anybody tryin’ to steal my girl.” You simply shook your head at him as he opened the passenger door, offering his hand to help you climb into the truck. You slid to the middle seat like you did every time you rode with him, tucking yourself into his side and purring in delight as his hand latched onto your thigh, rubbing it over the thin fabric of your skirt.

You remembered a time when you scoffed at the puppy love couples out on dates, making goo-goo eyes across the table and playing footsie under it, giggling at every little thing. Oh, how the tables turn, you thought as the waitress set down your Oreo shake with two straws stuck in it. “How cheesy,” you hummed with a giggle.

“You mean romantic,” Sap insisted with a grin, humming in satisfaction as he took a long sip. “It’s a timeless classic, like movie dates or slow dancin’ in the rain.”

“You’re the romantic,” you laughed, shaking your head at him. “My big softie,” you sighed fondly.

“All yours,” he hummed as the check got placed on the table. His hand landed on it a second before yours and he gave a sickly sweet smile. “Aw, you wanna hold my hand, do ya, sugar?” He flipped his hand over and wrapped it around yours tightly, bringing your knuckles to his lips.

“Sapnap,” you hummed dangerously. “You worked hard today, so why don’t you let me cover the check?”

“Sweetheart, I got plenty of guns in the safe at home. The day I don’t pick up the check I want you to use ‘em on me.” You tried your best to scowl at him and he pouted in return. “Now don’t be like that darlin’, you know I can’t stand to see you upset. Tell you what,” he hummed, moving the check aside and wrapping both his hands around yours. “When you decide you’re ready for a ring on that pretty little finger we’ll tell my boss to send my paycheck straight to you, then you can pay for whatever you want, how’s that sound, sugar?”

“That sounds like you’re trying to sweet talk me into letting you pay.”

“Is it working?”

“Yes,” you laughed, making him cackle along with you.

“That’s my girl! Come on, now, darlin’, don’t make me drink this all by myself.”

#i only have 1 example of a healthy relationship in my life #so dont sue me if you think their relationship seems weird #angymouse #squeakin #sapsqueaks #countrynap #mcyt smut