#i wish i could just not care.

[widevibratobitch]

.

#me: i wear makeup for fun teehee #also me when i go out in public without makeup: everyone hates me and i should kms #anyway. yeah. funny. i just feel like i dont deserve to live and take up public space if i dont make an effort to conform even a little #but then again its not like i actually do my make up to be 'pretty'. i just like to make sure that there's enough #colourful glittery bullshit on my face to distract everyone who looks at me from the fact that im fucking ugly as shit lol #but i also genuinely do have fun doing it and i like looking Extra #idk maybe i wouldnt be having these issues if i had a more conventionally attractive face. but i fucking hate everything about it #and wish i could just claw it all off and start anew. and get a new skull too. one that doesnt have the bone structure of a fucking ball #idk i just feel like it's so fucking unfair that i look like THIS #and also simultaneously won the FUCKING OBSESSED WITH HOW I LOOK AND AM PERCEIVED trait in the great lottery of Things Wrong With You #i wish i could just not care. #but then again idk maybe it makes sense. maybe id be a much worse person if i were pretty since i wouldn't feel like i need to be #on my best behaviour 24/7 and must constantly Make Up For It to others so that i am Allowed to idk have basic human rights ig #anyway. bitches be like 'i hate plastic surgeries'. 10 minutes later 'i must get a nose job or ill kms'

[lostlegendaerie]

there's something deeply gutting about being a writer right now. watching studio execs brag about starving people like you out of your very house just to not pay you anything above the pennies you currently make. watching some people cheer over AO3 being targeted for a DDOS attack. the complete lack of profitability of writing commissions or writing in general in transformative spaces, especially in contrast to fanart. the pivot of so many social media platforms to be video and image based near-exclusively.

I don't know. it just makes me sad to know that the hobby that kept me alive while growing up homeschooled with dial-up internet and local antenna TV... is only ever gonna be a side job with minimal engagement. I know this site is good about supporting libraries and the concept of books but, do me a favor? Reach out to a writer friend you know. Leave a comment on your last five read stories on your favorite website.

Tell us you care.

#maybe that's why I've been so stalled on my novel #I keep trying to convince myself there's a POINT to it #but I look at how BRUTAL the publishing industry is and how I can't even consistently break ten reblogs on writing I post here #and I just. it hurts. and I have other hobbies I could fall back on!!! I could do art and cosplay and cater to the immediate engagement!! #but writing is my LOVE and my PASSION and I just wish. I wish the current climate CARED about us #TALKED to us the way we talk to cosplayers and artists and the chocolate guy #UGH. Wednesday blues hitting me NASTY today

[romansmartini]

FREAKING AWESOME BEST GUY EVER I LOVE YOU.

#succession #jeremy strong #read the article if you want but most of the rest of it is just them dissing on his Method #i don’t even care. like this is sooooooooo. it’s like he’s taking lessons in becoming a real boy #and that’s awesome. wish i could do that

[utterdrip]

love my smoother-than-average brained lover

#frankie posts #bg3 spoilers #astarion #bg3 #astarion acunin #bg3: vid #part ii of no plans just chaos and violence #i dont know and i dont care to know #failed world checks and general passive questioning flr this one:) #i hope u enjoy nonnie ! #still wish i could get the bear one:( #astarion baldurs gate #baldurs gate 3 #baldurs gate astarion #baldur's gate 3 #baldur's gate iii

[napping-sapphic]

Sometimes i wish flirting was as easy as taking a girls face in my hands and telling her i have time for her, that i’ve got time for all her hopes and worries and rants and goals and wants and needs

#wlw #wlw mood #sapphic #sapphism #lesbian #like idk #ive just got so much time and energy to devote to loving someone #but you can’t just SAY that #youve gotta do the flirt and the date and only THEN do you get to show them #but i am BAD at the first two steps🙃 #like pls just let me show i care enough to make time and spend my time on you cause thats all i want to DO if i like you #ughhhhhh #dating is so HARD i wish i could do it #im gay and i like sleeping

[guinevereslancelot]

what was with cameron house md she spends 90% of the episode saying she wants their patient to die bc he's a genocidal dictator and her colleague husband says "babe it bothers me for ethical reasons that you want our patient to die :(" and she said "hm maybe you're right :/" but when it comes down to it the genocidal dictator lays a finger on her in an aggressive manner and chase instantly commits medical malpractice to murder the guy and then when he tells her she LEAVES HIM bc boo hoo he's a murderer now like GIRL he killed a man for you!!! he's wracked with catholic guilt!!! he's being crushed beneath the weight of his sins because he chose his devotion to you over his devotion to god!!! he literally could not get any sexier at this moment in time!!!

#girl what are you doing...... #also just in general she did not deserve him honestly he was so good to her and for WHAT #just to be abandoned at peak devotion and guilt and hotness 🙄 #girl get OUT of my way i'm stronger than you #if she cared she could fix him or make him worse but i could love and support him no matter what 😌 #his muder is a part of him and its SEXY #robert chase #house md #malpractice md #i know the actors broke up irl or whatever but wtf..... #i should have ended my rewatch w their happy lil wedding at the end of s5 #s6 everything instantly goes to shit #and stays shitty #chase should be happy fr #he's supposed to turn into house basically but they should have made him the well adjusted version of house #like how nightwing is the well adjusted version of batman #anyway i have no real point here i just lowkey dont like cameron bc of this arc #also her obsession w house is so weird i wish they hadn't made that a thing #this has been a shitpost #anyway she left chase at the absolute peak of his sexiness wtf....... #anyway since this apparently needs to be said its not that deep this is a silly post if you send me hate messages i wont answer #i block and ignore anon hate bc i am too busy touching grass to be rude to strangers over a tv show

[royalarchivist]

Pac: Oh, Nenê... How cute... 🥺💕

After dying to an atomic creeper in a cave and stressing over potentially losing all his items, Pac returns home to set his spawn and receives a sweet surprise:

His cat falls asleep on top of him and purrs when he goes to bed :')

#QSMP #Pactw #Pac #March 28 2024 #I had the exact same reaction as Pac my heart frickin melted THIS IS SO CUTE.... AND THE PURRING.... MY HEART #I desperately wish Pac got to hang out with Madagio (in his cat-form) #because cats clearly adore Pac just as much as he loves them #Maybe in an alternate universe Madagio spent a day with Pac #And in that time he learned why Fit came to care for this man so much #I don't need more WIPs on my plate but I am Pondering the idea #If the cat-hybrid Cellbit thing was canon I could crack a joke about the ''cats clearly adore Pac just as much as he loves them'' thing #but alas #For real though lock Madagio in a room with Pac for 12 hours and he'll leave being grudgingly charmed by him #aghhhh #Anyways this is so cute #but also really sad #because how many times do you think Pac's been in his room depressed over his missing son / friends / roommate #only to have his cats burrow under his arm and nudge their way onto his lap? #Don't get me started I'm feeling Emotional about cubito Pac lately

[ali3nboyfriend]

i see a lot of talk of fellow adhd and autistic folk feeling like they’re too much for other people but i don’t see a lot of talk about feeling like you’re not enough. low energy adhd and autism where it takes a lot of effort to use words so your way of showing affection is to sit there and vibe in people’s presence but it comes off like you’re not paying attention or it’s not “active” enough to count, or forgetting to reply to DMs (or like i said, Words Hard), and it again comes off as you not caring or ignoring people. it’s really hard to be putting in so much effort to maintain friendships you value only for that effort to not be seen, or to be read as apathy, or for it to be seen but still not be what other people want. even worse when you try and talk more and be more active in a relationship but you end up burning yourself out because you don’t have enough energy to maintain it.

#starscream.txt #i struggle a lot with feeling like i’m not Enough of a presence for people #i like to just. listen to people. but i’ve had several people stop talking to me because me just listening comes off as me not caring #or finding them annoying #which it isn’t #and it fucking sucks. idk #i understand RSD and the need for validation so i don’t begrudge anyone that #i just wish i could be met on my field sometimes. i wish my natural behaviors didn’t read like apathy #or annoyance #i wish people could see my ways of showing affection for what they are #vent i guess

[svtskneecaps]

lukewarm take of the evening: y'all care too much about being ""outdated"". fellas this smp moves inhumanly fast. it is ok to CHILL holy shit CHILL. y'all are like "(posts BANGER ART) super late guys sorry" friend i am hitting you with a blanket i am snapping you with my metaphorical towel WHAT DO YOU MEAN SORRY. "(posts BANGER FIC) rip this is outdated now" WHO CARES???? I LOVE YOU, OK. ohhhh woe is us as the fandom at large for having MORE HAPPY PILLS ARC CONTENT oh no how outdated!! how could you be writing speculative fiction about how forever felt during happy pills :( slash SARCASM!! WHAT DO YOU MEAN!!!! THERE ARE SO MANY BANGER ARCS, WHAT, YOU THINK WE'RE COMPLAINING????? FOR GETTING MORE OF THE CONTENT WE LOVED????? oh no we're past the period where everyone thought green gay ninjas were like Dead Dead, my work is now outdated and noncanon :( WDYM. GIMME. A BANGER IS A BANGER IDC IF IT TAKES THREE MONTHS. you think rome was built in a day?? fuck you, baltimore, GIMME. my ass has been cooking a goddamn backflipo family fic since july when it was ALREADY outdated do you think i fear god??? "oh no, you're making an edit of slime's (attempted) egg murdering spree?? how could you, that was months ago it's irrelevant" SAID NO ONE EVER.

save your wrists kidlings ok carpal tunnel is no joke. CHILL!!!!! CHILL!!!!!!!! TAKE YOUR TIME SHEEEEEESH OK LOVE YOU <3

#qsmp #shut up vic #block game brainrot #IT IS OK TO NOT ALWAYS POST SHIT THIRTY SECONDS AFTER IT HAPPENS!!!!!!! #for god's sake we have MONTHS of lore and bangers ok??? #i still have a mental image of an art i wish i could make from BOBBY'S NIGHTMARE #HE HAS BEEN GONE FOR M O N T H S and you bet your ass if i can make it I WILL BE POSTING IT #SO. MUCH. SHIT. HAS. HAPPENED. who cares if it was months ago!!!!!! #it's ok to be a few days late!!! it's ok to be a few months late!!!!! don't tell me sorry for feeding me!!!!!! #part of me still lives in I'M NOT HOLDING A FUCKING FUNERAL CHAT #part of me still lives in maxo's final song for his son!!!! #part of me still lives in the day we thought ramón was gone for good #part of me still lives in cellbit sprinting to his son only to be ripped away back to the feds just as richas turns to write a sign #part of me still lives in the flooding of the copacabana ocean #THESE ARE BANGERS. REMEMBER WHEN FIT FOUND PAC E MIKE IN PRISON. BANGER. #oh dear new work expanding on a canon moment i super liked that happened months ago how late smh SAID NO ONE EVER #TWO CAKES!!!!! TWO CAKES MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!! WE LOVE PASTRIES DON'T EVEN WORRY ABOUT IT #COME ON Y'ALL. METAPHORICAL KISSES. LOVE YOU. HAVE A GOOD WEEK. #long tags

[heronoegg]

squad going to Kinoko's pool party arc

#i just wanted to draw girls at the pool arent they cute????? #i guess idk #sorry for not drawing a whole lot #my skills went somewhere cause i stop drawing for awhile i wish i could just draw them how i used to #it looked so much better god #art #bnha #my hero academia #mina ashido #sero hanta #bakugo katsuki #denki kaminari #female sero #female kaminari #female bakugo #bakusquad #these are so bad like i could do better i can draw them better #dont talk to me about drawing umbrellas i dont care enough

[canisalbus]

sorry im emotonal and going off of the other asks sent about machete and just i need to stress how beautiful it is to me that machete sees himself so undeserving of love and affection and feeling as if vasco's too good for him but despite all that he is so incredibly devoted to vasco and loving towards him (in his own way) but is so incredibly clear to anyone with eyes that just how in love he is with vasco. like it's not done out of a "oh god please never realize that you're too good for me here here let me overdo it with the affection" its done with the "i love you, and will always love you, no matter what happens to us or separates us, and i will give it to you as long as i am able, and if you ever leave, i won't be okay, but will still love you, and want you happy". like he doesn't use his own feelings of being undeserving taint his love or the way he loves for vasco, and it's so, so beautiful

.

#;M; #oauhh #that's so sweet I'm in shambles and so glad to hear all of that #sometimes I worry about whether I'm communicating their chemistry correctly #it would be so easy for this sort of relationship to gain suffocating and possessive and overall just abusive tones #and even though you could argue it would be a source for juicy drama I just don't want that #Machete could selfishly exploit Vasco's care and altruism without giving anything in return #or worse let his paranoia and jealousy get the better of him and end up destroying them both because if he can't have Vasco no one can #and Vasco could leverage his influence over Machete to manipulate and use him because out of them two he's the more mentally stable one #and it would be easy to take advantage of Machete's vulnerability obedience and his trust that Vasco would never harm him #but I don't know maybe it's a bit tropey and idealistic but I really just want these dogs to be genuinely good for each other #they have so many things working against them already I don't wish to see them backstab each other as well #they have a bit of a 'us against the world' thing going on which I really like #they're not perfect there's issues they're trying to work on but the will to get through it together is there #and I want to make it seem like they wouldn't hesitate to prioritize the other one's happiness and wellbeing at their own expense #if it came to that #anwered #anonymous

[ethanhuntfemmefatale]

sometimes i think about an AA universe where Edgeworth didn't have to be shuffled off every 5 seconds so he could maintain credibility as a rival....where Phoenix didn't have to win every case...yes AA is a game yes i understand why it did that for the narrative. but when I look at those lonely scared 24 year olds from AA1 i can't help but think that their version of a happy ending would be to be able to get used to each other. to face each other over stupid cases and small things. Sometimes one winning, sometimes the other, until it hardly matters anymore, all that matters is finding the truth together. I want them to take each other for granted!!! i want them to look at the other across the courtroom and say "time to face this bitch for the hundredth time i guess!!" these poor bastards have never had anything approaching emotional stability before let them have each other damn it

#idk im just. emotional #i feel like at that age?? at that place in their character development??? romance aside that would be legit be #the best happiest situation for both of them. and i feel things when i imagine it #we see so much of the grand gestures intense moments side of their relationship #they're always helping each other in their darkest moments and stuff like that but i wish they could also have #a very mundane professional dynamic. bitchy and prickly and earnest cause they both care a lot. and loving in their way #it's sad to me that so much of fic revolves around the idea that 'when phoenix and miles start dating miles will finally stay' thats #so tragic!!!!!!! am i the only person who thinks that's tragic #the game had to keep them apart for Narrative Reasons but i know my boy miles edgeworth and he would want to get bored of that spiky hairdo #and that handsome face. from seeing it in court so much. #narumitsu #wrightworth #phoenix wright #miles edgeworth #ace attorney #aa1 #aa2 spoilers #aa3 spoilers

[ecoamerica]

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#ACLA24 #ACLA24Leaders #youtube #youtube video #climate leaders #climate solutions #climate action #climate and environment #climate #climate change #climate and health #climate blog #climate justice #climate news #weather and climate #environmental news #environment #environmental awareness #environment and health #environmental #environmental issues #environmental justice #environment protection #environmental health #Youtube

[shootingstarpilot]

I see a lot of posts expressing frustration with the fanon idea that certain highly competent characters (yes, this post is about Obi-Wan, but I've seen others) can't take care of themselves and need others to bully them into eating, sleeping, etc.. While I totally get that frustration, I personally very much enjoy that trope. I've been trying to dissect why I enjoyed it since I saw those critiques, and I think I finally managed to put it to words.

(Disclaimer: I live in the United States, so my discussion about healthcare is operating in the framework of the man-eating trash fire that is the American healthcare system.)

I am a busy person outside of fandom. I recently completed a cross-country move. I'm damn good at my job and I love what I do, but it's hard work and a lot of it is on call. I have bills to pay. I have paperwork to fill out. I have messages to send and more messages to reply to. I have a life that is full of things I don't want to do. We all do. It's part of existing in society.

I am also chronically ill.

We live in a system that is actively hostile to putting your own health first. The healthcare system is impossible to navigate even if you are feeling the very pinnacle of health and wellbeing, and good fucking luck trying to do so when you're sick. Good luck trying to go to work and pay your bills and fill your tank. Good luck trying to do your paperwork and cook your meals and clean your apartment. Good luck trying to muster up the energy to respond to the well-meaning communications of friends and family.

But here's the thing- you still have to.

The rest of the world doesn't stop when you're sick. The rest of your life doesn't pause when you need it to. Sometimes you have to sacrifice sleep to make it to a doctor's appointment, or skip breakfast to make it to work on time. Every one of us, to some extent or another, has had to sacrifice what would be best for our health in order to stay functional in this fucked-up, capitalistic, carnivorous society.

So I think my preference for reading and writing fics like the ones I mentioned at the beginning has a certain level of wish fulfillment to it. Someone who is competent and good at their job and has an extraordinary level of responsibility on their shoulders sacrifices their own well-being to keep the rest of the world going-

And someone else makes sure they eat. Someone else makes sure their health gets tended to. Someone else makes sure they sleep, and that the world doesn't fall apart while they do so.

A lot of times, we don't get to make those decisions, or we feel guilty when we do. In reading fics like these, I feel like I get to outsource those decisions- outsourcing self-care, if you will. You don't have to feel guilty about putting your own health first, because you're not making the choice to do so. Someone else is.

It's okay. Get some rest.

#my life is also full of things and people that i love don't worry #it's just interesting to think about this sort of wish fulfillment #if anyone else wants to contribute thoughts please do #i'm sure someone more eloquent than me could put this better #outsourcing self-care #fandom #obi-wan kenobi #ao3 #fanfiction

[liquidstar]

When watching Saiki K is so important to keep in mind that Saiki does not talk, we're only hearing his thoughts as the viewers. Not just because it's an awesome character trait but because, like, the other characters don't have the context we do. What we're seeing is Saiki showing his friend a hamster and saying "can you take care of this?" But all they're seeing is Saiki holding out a hamster and looking at them like 😐

#but they still get it which i love #you could probably say he's using subtle telepathy to make them understand his thoughts without hearing them but tbh #i like the hc that they just understand him bc they know him. i think it sells the idea that these weirdos care about him too #it's better that way #honestly i wish they didn't have that one moment where he speaks it loud let him just be nonverbal it's fine #anyway I'd love an edit of some scenes with saiki's inner thoughts removed so we can experience their perspective lol

[aoi-kanna]

I don't want a lot for Christmas There is just one thing I need

#I don't care about the presents #Underneath the Christmas tree #I just want you for my own #More than you could ever know #Make my wish come true #All I want for Christmas is you #yeah #here it comes #>w<

[cerise-on-top]

heyhey!! just wanted to say your works are amazing and i love them so so so SO much aagghhh!!

now onto the request— what if,, what if reader knew a ton of languages like nikolai does, and they call their s/o pet names in those languages. an example would be,, maybe if they knew french they would say 'mon chéri' or perhaps they picked up romanian at some point and would call them 'dragă'

the characters i have in mind are price, nik, alejandro, & rudy, if that's okay !! (´▽`)

sorry for the super long ask, lol :')

Hey there! Thank you, that makes me really happy to hear :D And don't worry about sending longer asks, I really don't mind ^^ Also, that request is really cute! I love reader speaking several languages and being a sweetheart in all of them :D

Price, Alejandro, Rodolfo and Nikolai with an S/O who Knows Many Languages

Price: I think he knows quite a few languages himself, being a captain in the SAS and all. Not nearly as many as Nikolai, but he probably knows a good three to four languages, so he likely wouldn’t be entirely clueless when you call him something along the lines of mon petit chou fleur. While he won’t understand every term of endearment you call him, it does warm his heart to hear you speak a language he doesn’t know. It flows off your tongue very nicely and he just loves listening to you. Depending on what kind of language it may be, even the profanities sound nice. Although whenever you want to get his attention, just to call him something in a language he doesn’t understand, he sort of expects it to be some cute pet name. Will always smile at you, even if you were to call him your albernes kleines Kaninchen. Retorts with a pet name in one of the languages he speaks. Sometimes he does feel the urge to learn a new language, just for you. Or maybe you could learn a new language together? Practice with each other and just have a good time overall? He might bring up the idea at some point.

Alejandro: Like Price, he probably knows a few languages himself. More than the average person, but not nearly as many as Nikolai. So probably three to four as well. However, because he knows Spanish there’s a good chance he can derive most words in a Romance language. Call him something along the lines of giliw and he’ll always retort with some embarrassing pet name in Spanish. Yes, he knows several languages himself, but that doesn’t mean he won’t almost always revert to Spanish anyway. Pretends that you’re using your languages against him and calls you a traitor. And, as is the rule in your household when you’ve betrayed him, you will be held accountable. Lots of chasing through the house. Will “interrogate” you to get you to tell him what you said. Call him a term of endearment in Spanish and you won’t ever hear the end of it. No matter how many times he hears you call him guapo, he always gets that goofy grin on his face. Might research embarrassing terms of endearment to use on you in any other language. And yes, his goal is to find a language you don’t speak. Once he’s found one? He’s not gonna let you live it down. He’s bested you, and that’s all he wanted.

Rodolfo: You’d actually have to call him by his name if you want his reaction since he usually just tends to block out people speaking a language he doesn’t know. Why bother trying to understand someone like that? It’s not like he’ll learn the language overnight anyway. Rodolfo knows about three languages, so not as many as Alejandro. But he knows English and Spanish, which means he can communicate in most places anyway. He thinks he knows enough languages since learning one takes roughly an eternity and he doesn’t have the time for that anyway. Call him Cục vàng and he’ll just look at you as though you’ve grown a second head. You’d have to tell him what it means and then he’ll smile. While he will always appreciate a good Hartlam, he might look at you confused until you tell him you love him. Might not always retort with a pet name of his own, but will mix it up among the languages he does know since he doesn’t wanna seem too stupid next to you. Will also sometimes look up new terms of endearment in languages he doesn’t know so he can surprise you, but might get a bit shy since he might botch the pronunciation a bit. But he tries, and that’s all that matters.

Nikolai: He canonically knows eight languages, so there’s a good chance he knows what you’re saying. Even when you’re saying something in a language he might not entirely know, he might be able to derive the word from a language he does know. Although he may love any pet name you give him, he especially loves any Russian ones since he’s very attached to his country and his native tongue. Goes absolutely wild whenever you call him radnoy. There’s just something so sweet about you calling him something nice in Russian, doesn’t even matter if you botch the pronunciation. Will always give you a hug and a kiss to your forehead since he will always be reminded of how much he loves you. But even a simple min søde skat will get him to smile, even if he has no idea what it means this time. Because of you he might be inspired to pick up some new languages along the way, maybe even ones you don’t know so you can get the same treatment he does with you. Whenever you speak a language he doesn’t know he gets heart eyes for you. You’re just so gorgeous, you’re just so very smart. However, at some point he will just start speaking Russian to you, even if you don’t know the language. He won’t say anything mean, he’ll just tell you how precious you are and how much he loves you.

#cod #cod x reader #john price #john price x reader #price x reader #alejandro vargas #alejandro vargas x reader #rodolfo parra #rodolfo parra x reader #cod nikolai #nikolai x reader #I wish I knew more languages than I actually do #I'd love to be at least trilingual. I suppose one of these days I shall learn another language #I've already started the same one twice but I never got too far since something always came inbetween #Oh what I'd give to be lovey dovey with someone in three languages #I wish I still knew Italian. I learned it in school but I never needed it again #I also had Latin. If you give me a dictionary and some time I could probably translate some sentences still #or maybe not. it's been three years now #but I suppose being cringe in German and my own dialect is just fine #I've always loved speaking my dialect to my best friend who only knows English #I've also always loved texting him in said dialect #“Your impossible to Google translate German” I love that guy so much he's so silly #I will never cease my silly dialect!! that's why there will be plenty of König to go around :-) I don't care. he speaks my dialect #gonna hit y'all with a good old Servas griaß di #König is my little Barbie doll: I make him do whatever I want #sorry this derailed into König again. I just love shaking and rotating him violently in my head ^^