#im never not losing my mind over them

[suffarustuffaru]

so i talked a bit about reinjulisuba on this blog in the past like in this one ask but now ive made a quick and easy diagram summarizing their whole deal <3

#rezero #re:zero #natsuki subaru #reinhard van astrea #julius juukulius #arc 5 spoilers #THE REZERO BOY DRAMA IS INSANE 😭😭 they are so mentally ill knwdjdnd #reinjuli having not one not two but THREE brain chemistry life altering first meetings is fucking insane #julius is always cursed to have the worst first meetings of his life with random twinks #and julisuba being so stuck in astrea drama is so horribly funny 😭 theyre honorary family members at this point #THEN THERES REINSUBA BEING FREUDIAN….. #im never not losing my mind over them #i need to make a diagram with otto included in it also bc it gets EVEN WORSE… #rezero boy drama is crazy as always. theyre all deranged in different directions. i hate these men #reinhard knowing that reid is Like That and never telling/getting the chance to tell julius is the cherry on top 😭😭 #i need a 100k slow burn reinjulisuba fic STAT. im begging on my knees #also julisuba being into each other but also reinhard (platonic or romantic) but also admitting OUT LOUD that reinhards a monster. im crying

[recalled11]

Last sketch of the day, we've got swimming lessons!

No, Ravio doesn't know how to swim, so Legend has to teach him

#im losing my MIND over this water #i dont know HOW I DREW THAT #ill probably never be able to do something like that again #but oh well #i love it #i love them #theyre too good for this world #Recalled #Recalled sketches #Recalled Legend #Recalled Ravio

[unalteredgraces]

we as a society do not talk enough about the way joel looks at ellie here. the quiet adoration, the nervousness, the anticipation. the way he is perfectly fine with just watching her in the moment. the underlying acceptance of loving her and just being okay with it, the realization that he got a second chance with her and has finally grasped it with both hands. he seriously loves her so much and every inch of his being exudes it here

#im going to be sick #i'm seriously never ever getting over them its not even funny #slowly losing. my mind IMMDFJJHH #the last of us #joel miller #ellie williams #tlou #joel and ellie #the last of us part 2 #tlou2 #troy baker #ashley johnson

[randomminty]

Ive only got sv in the brain right now

#There honestly isnt a single character in sv i dont love to death oh my goooood theyre so good #Spoilers but the build up of each member of the e4 being revealed throughout the game and leaving one member as a complete mystery makes #The final reveal like 1000x funnier i lose my mind #art tag #pokemon #Iono and grusha never interact i think she would use him for clout #Theyre personalities are so different i would kill to see them interact tho #Geeta gives off such evil champion vibes sometimes she just says weird things. Im so glad she isnt actually hiding smth shes just like that #She said she wanted to visit my house. Dont do that maam #Gym leader iono #gym leader grusha #champion geeta #elite four rika #gym leader katy #nothing to say abt rika that hasnt been said. Hello #And katy???? Hi. So cute pretty. Her w a teddiursa is rly cute but her w an ursaring so so so cool #The rivals. Team star. The faculty. I want to talk abt every single character #Read over the tags grammar is very wonky today! Oops. Im not rewriting all of that tho #All these artworks couldve been independent posts but i drew them all in the same day so it feels right #I havent drawn for so long i just had like. A sudden boom and kept drawing #Ok thats all!!! Fav part of posting art is screaming in the tags #sv spoilers #chairwoman geeta #i forgot shes actually a chairwoman oops

[s0fter-sin]

youth by daughter is 09 soap in mw3, bitter and defeated after losing ghost, talking to 22 soap who’s so hopeful and secretly in love with his lieutenant

#just mw3 soap being broken after losing his entire team as well as ghost #talking to 22 soap who still has everything and is so full of love it almost makes 09 sick with grief #its a blend of him talking to 22 soap and almost warning him #‘and if youre still breathing youre the lucky ones. cause most of us are heaving through corrupted lungs’ #‘and if youre still bleeding youre the lucky ones. cause most of our feelings they are dead and they are gone’ #‘well ive lost it all im just a silhouette’ #‘and if youre in love then you are the lucky one cause most of us are bitter over someone. setting fire to our insides for fun #to distract our hearts from ever missing them. but im forever missing him’ #as well as him talking to his ghost #‘shadows settle on the place that you left. our minds are troubled by the emptiness’ #‘destroy the middle its a waste of time. from the perfect start to the finish line’ #‘my eyes are damp from the words you left ringing in my head when you broke my chest’ #theres a fic by m1ckstar i think? something like that #about soap worshipping price and him just slowly losing it after he comes back and breaks his perception of him as a god #and mourning ghost at the same time #and i never shouldve read bc fuck if it didnt hurt #coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt #talk to me ghost #soapghost #ghostsoap #09 soapghost #09 soap #09 ghost #soap cod #soap mactavish #ghost cod #simon ghost riley #we’re a team. ghost team

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

this is not fire emblem i just have to say

HOW IS IT

THAT WE GOT

CHRIS PRATT

FOR MARIO IN THE MARIO MOVIE

RIGHT? RIGHT

AND JAPAN GOT FUCKING MAMORU MIYANO IM FUCKIN LOSIN IT

#DCB Comments #us: chris pratt for real #japan: THE MAN THE MYTH THE LEGEND THE BELOVED MAMO-CHAN #i just found this out and my brain is trying to process this at all speed and failing miserably #everyone was like can we have ACTUAL voice actors for voice acting work #AND JAPAN IS OVER HERE /ON/ THAT WITH MAMO-CHAN??? #im losing my mind right now yes im only just finding this out #i hadn't even thought abt watching that movie but im this close just listen to mamo's performance as mario #what is this sorcery what is this ABSOLUTELY BATSHIT INSANE DISCONNECT #west: what if we hired chris pratt that's a good name everyone knows #japan: what if we hired mamo-chan that's a perfect name everyone knows and will love #but it's also hilarious the man with the softest fucking voice i have ever heard in my life voices mario at all #it's going to take me all week to properly integrate that into my brain's recollection ability #i know im late to the party i just saw it in passing and after the huge backlash from chris pratt voicing mario #seeing japan on the TOTALLY opposite side of ''voice actors get va roles'' spectrum is just killin me #mario must be D A M N precious to them even for that movie bc they didn't pull their hiring punches #that's a level of care in the hire we will probably never see in the west im dead gjksjhfgjs

[karamazovanon]

thought about raskolnikov while listening to car seat headrest incident 39 dead 18407 injured

#literally every csh fits him but it was sober to death that made me snap #might make a parallel post with razumikhin at the end uprooting his life to siberia to “...begin a new life together” and the line #“dont worry / you and me wont be alone no more” because im dissolving into seafoam over it #not to mention the you can text me when punching mattresses gets old / dont think itll always be this way / not comforted by anything i say #oghgohhogohhhgh #and NERVOUS YOUNG INHUMANS GETS MY ASS TOO. #you never lifted your voice / you never raised your hand / i only showed you my inhuman / you understand #like what if i walke dinto the ocean #anontalks #sorry i post about music so much idk why thats always where my brain goes #eventually i will make organized playlist posts. someday. i have drafts for the brothers but i need to Cultivate them #<- also if you want to lose your mind think about ivan w any csh :) #the beach life in death i dont want to be insane / i dont want to have sc/hizophrenia (dont want to clog that tag) #that part of the song. so. so ivan

[ranger-kellyn]

y'ALL KNOW I'M GOING GD FERAL RIGHT NOW

#pokemon #pokeani #pokeani spoilers #spoilers #phaesporiashipping #now #with the coherent tags out of the way #oiM #IM FUCKING SHAKING AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #tell me u ship a rarepair w/o telling me u ship a rarepair: #i'm about to lose my fucking mind over them tALKING TO EACH OTHER #IM THEY!!!!!!!!!!!! #THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #I HAVE BEEN OBSESSED WITH THESE BITHCES FOR YEARS AND THEY NEVER EVEN INTERACTED BUT NOW #HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #im vibrating in my fuckuing seat #aaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #im cryuing

[codecicle]

been using this to fight most of my anxiety recently. "oh my god the room is spinning my heart is pounding I can't breath" your honor after reviewing the evidence, who gives a fuck lowkey. pop those shock mints and your dick and get on with your day soldier

#i make yet anothet post just for me 👍 #if it makes me anxious i shouldnt have to do it ever actually im the worlds specialest little boy and i should be treated as such #im going insane in this school i am losing my mind #my mom gave me these strong ass sour ass mints to suck on whenever i start feeling like a meltdown or a panic attack #and ima be fr they worked for like a day i need something stronger #going insane over here. im constantly scared and shaking and i wish to be normal again (<- has never been normal a day in his life LMAO) #these classes and teachers and kids suck and i dont know why i cant handle them this year its just gotten so much worse outta NOWHERE #anyway worlds smallest vent (as in a little vent on the floor to make a joke out of) my bad 😔😔

[cinnamon-notes]

i have been ghosting my friends for idk a month??? and they have been doing the same??? except for when we meet in a workplace cuz somehow our jobs decided to cross over :)

#feeling so bad about it but like i cant bring myself to interact with people right now but i am also constantly sad because i dont interact #with anyone out of work :/ but working makes me socially exhausted & tbh all i wanna do is be depressed with my books & my movies &my tunes #but i also crave affection like i realize i have zero social life and i sometimes schedule some hangout with my friends but it's almost #become like idk a task? something i look at through work eyes. like- i arrange our hangouts the way i arrange work meetings. it's so sad. #i know it is. but still- i cant help it. through all my life ive been missing having a lifelong friend who knows me like the back of their #hands and i know like the back of mine. never had it. cant cry over that. it's passed. i cant invent lifelong friendships that never existed #and i gotta make peace with that. plus- what am i complaining about if im just incapable of keeping any friend for longer than a month??? #after the first month- maybe the first couple of months- it all gets boring and dont get me wrong i really love my friends but somehow they #lose interest in me and i lose interest in them and we become just people who know each other and occasionally hang out but like- i've never #had a friend who's there for me when things happen in my life. i've always had friends to tell things to afterwards. like- i know i cant #really pick up the phone and say “hey. im having a bad time. can we take a walk? talk on the phone? can you tell me about your day? can you #just be here for me?“ and i cant even idk just randomly pop up with a ”oh my god i hate him i hate him i hate him it's a whole montague vs #capulet but if romeo and juliet never existed kind of hatred!!“ i just cant vent right away. ive always thought that that's my problem. #and maybe it is. but still- how's come they can vent to me? im always there right away. i do love my people and i show up for them. #sometimes my depression makes it soooo difficult to hang out constantly but if there's one thing that cannot be said about mw is that i dont #care. cuz i do. and maybe that's the problem #and maybe it's just easier for me to care than let others care? idk? but then again- i did try to open up. i did try to let them care. i did #try everything by the book & off the book but still- idk it's always just an “im sorry” never an “i care so much to say more than im sorry” #and yeah it's my problem cuz i am not a constant person im not that steady in what i do. i still dont know if it's because i havent found #yet the people worth doing it or if i am just traumatized (my ex is knocking on this door lol) but- idk it makes me extremely sad!!! #and ive rambled on way too much but i jusg needed to let some things out of my mind cuz i cant understand whats wrong with me and why i #crave true friendships although im hella scared of and bored of and unwilling to nurturing one :) #cinnamon diary

[brokenpuns]

OKAY NOW THAT IM POSTING MY R6 STUFF HERE HEAR ME OUT ON FENSMOKE………

#rainbow six siege #ive been losing my mind over on priv twitter #straight up projectile vomiting and bleeding out of my eyes #and we all know tumblr tags is the best format for rambling.. #LOOK it started as haha they both use Chemicals #but then i was rereading smokes profile and it kept mentjoning fear and something happened in my brain #understand that it's more important to respect fear than to try to pretend we never feel it Ok #i think fen would be enamoured by how well smoke deals w stress #i swear there are some awesome parallels here i swear.. #also rainbows really wary of both of them to an extent i think they could find solace in eachother #DO YOU SEE THE VISION #OR AM I JUST BRAINED #i have so many thoughts about them that i cannot share at the moment due to Brain Things but yeah #im self proclaimed fensmoke ceo rn #fensmoke #forever #3:29 am aaaand post

[gamesyoushouldbeplaying]

Jacob Geller wasnt kidding, that time loop can nihilism

#deathloop #guess whos got deathloop brainrot 2 years later #the ethics of this game drive me insane #if ur the only person trapped in a time loop who knows are you obligated to save it or destroy it? #are you really better than the rest of the visionaries when you kill them all over and over and over? #i have never had a game take me from 'Oh No NPC dont come over here i dont want to kill you!' #to 'how can i kill these guys as efficiently as possible so i can explore easier' this fast #it even has me considering leaving stealth almost entirely which is wild i love stealth :( #but stealth is only really fun the first time through an area or when its avoiding consequences sucessfully #but like fr the more i think about juliannas perspective the more its so crunchy! Like shes basically protecting a bunch of people #living the same day over and over forever #and thats not even getting into the sheer crunchiness of colt and franks relationship like! god i have so many thoughts #anyway shutting up now #gaming #jacob geller #still not done so no spoilers pls #anyway guess who just found out juliana is *spoilers redacted* and im losing my fucking mind a second time #this time loop ruined peoples lives not just once but twice #did colt make all this just to try to recreate the *spoilers* time he lost trapped in a loop????? #im going insane #i speak

[craycraybluejay]

i should get more method by smoking more weed + remembering the million times i got too fucked up and thought i was going to die or just very but not too fucked up and how it felt in the moment. the confusion, weird fixations, wack visuals, nausea, dissassociation, shame, real and vivid fear of death.

i can tell y'all i have had someone make active attempts on my life but there is no death as frightening as the idea of dying in a puddle of puke and other bodily fluids feeling so disoriented and so much physical pain and discomfort that you'd pay a million dollars to crawl directly out of your body. there's easier OD concepts to stomach like one depressants but the concept of dying on a psychedelic or an upper or even a stimulating dissociative is terrifying. or dying from contaminants which injure you a lot more than whatever you were meaning to take ever could.

i want to write angel having a seizure the way i did. i want to write him compulsively adding different substances because just the one isn't enough. i want to torture this lil guy as he tries and fails to save himself :3

#as i always say please test your drugs im begging you #delete later #getting too personal up in here #but fr the world of serious substance use is a crazy place to even visit let alone live in #the entirety of reality just does not work the same way #its beautiful and scary and you dont want to become a permanent resident there #but its a lot like toxic relationships and maladaptivelt returning to them over and over #i want to parallel angel's drug abuse with his relationship to valentino #because even if you OD or have some kind of serious problem from it or get spiked with something awful #chances are you will always have that curiosity and urge to try again. try more. different new novel fun #bc even when it feels like hell its a unique hell. and more importantly its not your life anymore #no worries about being abused or homeless or very sick if the drugs bring a whole new hell #sometimes when you almost die you just get grateful it wasnt the real world that almost killed you #sometimes when youve looked in the void you laugh at how ridiculous your pain and grief and life is #its all stupid! none of it matters! we are all going to die and your exit card from the real world is in a box of mints #idk. sometimes a drug is an enhancer of reality and sometimes a different reality altogether. a lot of the experience depends on why you #take it. if you get high socially youre going to lean into related effects more heavily. if you do it to escape or explore thats what youll #get. ive never had the level of Problem Angel does but I Get It. i get why #im too broke to sustain a Problem of that nature lmao. like ok if i spend all my money i can lose my mind for a week #then ill be withdrawing and hungover from 20 diff things and penniless. no ty #however i will rarely say no to sharesies ill suck ya dick for my DOC 👍 #JOKING. ish

[icharchivist]

All of France have been protesting the most recent laws Macron has been pushing and today i'm seeing a fucking tweet from "Youth with Macron" about how Macron now set up a "Free condoms in pharmacy for people under 25" campaign, which has for slogan, and i kid you not, "Make love, not protest :)" i'm going to yell i'm going to yell i'M GOING TO YELL MACRON YOUR PEOPLE WANT TO KILL YOU MACRON THEY'RE SINGING ABOUT BEHEADING YOU WHAT ARE YOU DOING.

#MAKE LOVE NOT PROTEST??? MAKE LOVE NOT PROTEST????????????????? #it's a wordplay bc 'Make Love Not War' is said 'faite l'amour pas la guerre' #and war (guerre) and the specific type of protest where you skip work to go in the street and block things #is called a grève so it sounds similar #BUT HOW DO YOU DO A CAMPAIGN ABOUT 'DONT PROTEST GO FUCK INSTEAD' #DURING 'EVERYONE IS GETTING MURDEROUS ABOUT YOU' PROTEST #IM LOSING MY MIND IM LOSING MY MIND IM- #sorry being french on main again but 1) troubled times currently #2) with my En!Twt dead i spend more time on my Fr!Twt that i use to keep up with the news anyway #please im going tO CRY 'MAKE LOVE NOT PROTEST'????????????????????????????? #ichatalks #yknow how ppl keep saying Marie Antoinette's last words were 'let them have cake' #over the revolutionary crowd that was starving #and that it's historically false (she never said that and her last words were 'oh i'm sorry' bc she walked on the foot of her executioner) #well 'make love not protest' is probably much more accurate to the feeling 'let them have cake' is supposed to give #ie: the tonal dissonance of completely missing out how much your people want you dead #except that out of the two this is the one that is historically accurate #losing my MIND #also yes idk how much macron had a say in this slogan at all #and how much is just the org supporting him #buT YOU CAN SEE WHY IM ?????????

[saturnisfallingdown]

sorry I cant come in today. i'm currently falling down a rabbit hole about a random topic I learned about this morning. yeah no it will be all day. sorry

#saturn is rambling down #i used to be pretty into the pokemon card scene but have since left right ?? I didnt really buy rare cards but I liked knowing about them. #and i am now losing my mind over witnessing and learning about kpop photocards. this is a community i have NEVER heard about until now but #ITS SO BIG. i am so incredibly fascinated by this im studying this not like a bug but like an ecosystem

[wvrlock]

ooc

#i keep thinking of my heckna campaign (it's always on my mind and has been for over two years yeah) #but ummmm yeah my players can never find a day to play #i love that campaign i love playing it with them but it's a bit exhausting being the only person trying #there's one of my players who joined recently and was a spectator until very recently who's responsible #but aside from that im the one chasing after them always #and im... well #im attached to them as players and do have fun witb them but truth be told I don't really consider them friends anymore #they did some questionable things to a mutual friend #and i told them i wanted to talk about it because it upset me but that wouldnt change our relationship #because they had done nothing to me personally #but we never got to talk. in fact we havent seen each other in person for almost a year #when they know im unemployed and frankly free on most days #they never text me first either and we only talk about rp-related stuff #which doesn't really hurt anymore? they aren't my friends but they're my players and im okay with thar #but now... yeah they're kinda elusive as players as well #i know if i go and tell them i want to drop our campaigns i will lose them for good. there is nothing between us anymore #that does sadden me a little because they aren't bad people and i have loved them so so much #but... yeah they didn't make any efforts as friends and now they don't do it as players either #i think i could be able to put together a new table to be honest #because i do want to run heckna. it is a campaign that means so so so much to me #and... well i can live without dragon heist i suppose? i was really invested in my player's dynamics #and relationships with npcs #and i was SO excited to see it develop... but i don't think that's gonna happen in... idk years? #im just... thinking. #i could be my 'game day' to. you know. actually play something #ooc #negativity cw