#in conclusion they are idiots your honor | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

scarletwritesshit · 3 months

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📏 Dr. Ratio x Reader 📏 If I were Smart, I Would've Titled This with a Math Pun

This wasn’t the sort of rigorous stimulation that you were hoping for, but it was Dr. Ratio who suggested it, so you couldn’t exactly expect anything different. You blinked at the page that was laid out before you, dumbfounded. The problem on the page was rather complex even by your standards, almost as if it were written in some otherworldly script, which had a fair chance of being true. No worries, just break it down piece by piece to solve it? All...seemingly one thousand parts of it.

Dr. Ratio stood across from you, staring directly at you while tapping his foot on the ground with his arms crossed. You were quite surprised that he had not yet donned his stone-faced disguise, and quite frankly, you wish that he had. He was eyeing you up with a gaze that just screamed, "I could’ve had this solved 20 times by now, incompetent idiot." Which, was probably true.

It took a painfully long time, but at long last, you solved it, or at least you thought that you did. Your fingers went limp and released the pen from your hand, letting it almost roll off of the desk. You laid your head face down on the desk after circling the answer with a thick yet scribbly circle, emphasizing the results of your treacherous labor. At the sound of Dr. Ratio’s footsteps getting louder, you looked up at him to still see the same glint of disappointment in his eyes.

"I take it that you have reached your final conclusion?" he asked.

Without saying a word out of fear of premature judgement, you pushed yourself up from the desk so that he may freely observe and critique your work.

He skimmed over every extra page of your work quite rapidly, and in what felt like mere seconds, he pulled out a red pen and promptly marked your paper.

"Zero marks," he said bluntly, writing a massive red X over your answer.

You had a sinking feeling from the start that this was your inevitable fate, but hearing the actual words from him somehow stung a lot worse.

"In fact, I do not believe that I have ever seen anyone mess up so…horribly," he commented. "In fact, there are mistakes within mistakes, all among the most preposterous that I have ever seen in my life."

"...Thanks?" you said, as personally having the honor of making the most mistakes that Dr. Ratio has ever seen was better than your efforts simply being disregarded.

"My words were not intended to be interpreted as compliments, but rather, as a degradation of your overall performance and attitude towards your studies.”

"So?" you said, indifferent, "I’m still thankful that you spared some of your precious time to personally put me down."

"There must be something deeply wrong with your cognitive functions," he said, twirling his pen around between his fingers, "for I have never seen anyone quite enthusiastic about insult and utter disappointment."

"There are far easier ways to call me stupid, you know," you said, mockingly.

"Is your intelligence truly so challenged to the point that you cannot comprehend my direct words without the most basic of forms being utilized within a sentence? Why, you could not solve the simplest of problems if I asked of you!"

"You think I’m that dumb? Want me to prove it?"

"Oh, I believe you plenty, but since you proposed the offer, might I ask you for your interpretation of the answer to one added onto three?"

"I’m dumb, remember? Simple terminology, please," you said.

Despite his usage of overly complicated roundabout terminology, you knew exactly what he was asking of you. He was asking you to add 1 and 3 together. A simple question that anyone, even someone with your abilities could answer with ease. But, you wanted to see just how far you could push Dr. Ratio, before he caught onto your methods of toying with him. His patience was impressive enough considering how by now, you would’ve expected him to simply mark your paper with a failing score and walk off without another word.

With a noticeable twitch of frustration in his eyes, Dr Ratio said, "Fine, what is one plus three?"

"Five," you said, quickly and confidently.

"Are you positive that that is your final answer?"

You nodded yes. Dr. Ratio, no longer holding back his annoyance, leaned in closer and lifted your chin up with the back of his pen, forcing your eyes to meet his.

"You cannot possibly look me in the eyes and say that so…matter-of-factly," he said, frustrated.

"Oh, but I can,” you said with a smile. “And I just did."

"It is arguably a miracle how you have made it this far, not just in your studies, but in life as a whole. The fact that you fail to comprehend the most basic of tasks when I personally made the decision to allow you to study beneath me is well beyond my comprehension."

"Really? I was led to believe that you knew everything."

"It is physically impossible for one who is temporarily existent to learn all that our universe has to offer. Your stupidity, however, stretches even beyond the limits of our universe.”

"You’re saying that I’m so stupid that I’ve managed to become incomprehensible? Even to you?" you said with a proud grin.

"Regrettably, yes," he said, allowing the pen to fall down between his fingers, freeing his hand so that he could hold your chin up, "unless I perhaps study you for myself?"

"Study me? What is there to study, if I am as empty-headed as you claim?"

"How someone with intelligence comparable to a warp trotter has made it this far."

"But warp trotters’ lives don’t involve solving math problems, or whatever you’d call what you gave me."

"Which is why it is so baffling that you have made as much progression in your life as you have," he said, his grip tightening around your chin. "If it were anybody else, I would have promptly excluded you from my teachings."

"Anybody else?" you asked, tilting your head. "You mean, you’re going through all of this just for me?"

Dr Ratio went silent for a moment, and the grip that he had on your chin became a bit gentler. His eyes narrowed, yet his overall expression became softer. He seemed to be at a complete loss for an appropriate response to your claim. Either he was so baffled at your stupidity that he couldn’t quite find the words to express his annoyance, or you simply caught him off guard and red handed. The latter seemed more likely, as if your suggestion was truly so preposterous, he wouldn’t have wasted the time in putting you down.

"...A most fascinating conclusion," he finally said.

"Sounds like I got you now."

"I do have to applaud you for deciphering me in such a way, despite how you greatly lack otherwise."

"And after all of that, you still think Im an idiot? The answer to your question is four, by the way."

"Did it truthfully take you such an extended period of time to arrive at the correct answer?"

"No, I knew all along."

Knowing how he was the one outsmarted now, Dr. Ratio accepted defeat with grace, and laughed a little at his defeat. It wasn’t a laughter intended to put either of you down, but rather, a genuine expression of amusement, perhaps at himself for allowing such a situation to become so comedically blown out of proportion.

"Toying with me as a jest, I see. I will admit, it was rather clever of you to do in such a way, yet I still feel the need to observe you further."

"That is an unusual way of saying that you want to spend more time with me," you said with a laugh.

"Perhaps, but if it was nothing more than a jest, does this mean that you do not require my assistance with the problem before you? It seems an awful lot of effort to put into feigning intelligence, or lack thereof."

You lifted your face up from his hand and turned to look at the papers on your desk, with a large red X marked on your answer on one of the sheets. Right. You had completely forgotten about that.

“No…that I actually put my best effort into.”

“I shall see that you put your best effort forward into it during our second attempt together,” Dr. Ratio said, walking behind your chair. “Now, let us start fresh.”

He instructed you to tidy up your initial attempt and set it off to the side while he took out a fresh sheet of paper with a problem identical to the one you previously attempted on your own. He reached for the pen that was still dangling at the edge of the desk and laid it parallel to the side of the paper. As he loomed over you, you thought that he would be behind you the entire time, having to hear him critique every little mistake you make directly against your ear.

Your assumption was proven half correct when he leaned over you, placing his hands on opposite sides of you and practically pinning you to the desk. You looked to your side to see his face directly at your shoulder, able to feel his every breath against your face. Dr. Ratio smiled with an enthusiasm that seemed far too great to be suited to the likes of a basic education.

“Now then,” he whispered, “let us try our first time together.”

#honkai star rail #honkai star rail fanfic #dr ratio #dr ratio x reader #fanfic #fanfiction

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shalpilot · 4 months

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hey so kidkiller is. first of great ship name everyone pack it up it doesn’t get better than that. second off I’m like aaaaa liiiiiiitle fucked up still and thinking about them has me INSANE. fellas is it gay to call a man your one singular only-one partner. Fuckigg. Fellas. Childhood rivals turned friends turned “this isn’t technically a relationship but we’re obsessed with each other” turned oh they’re smoochin now huh wow that’s. that took them a while to come to that conclusion they’re making up for lost time huh. they’re making me insane. Their dynamic is so fuckig fun dude. two meatheads (one slightly less) just fucking shit up together holding stupid metal hands. i hate them. Kid out here defending his boy’s honor like a particularly yappy guard dog. Killer being like “okay :)” (the :) is /gen) because it’s not a surprise he’s heard it a million times before Kid’s shit idiot love language is WORDS OF AFFIRMATION LOUD EDITION and ACTS OF SERVICE FUCK YOU MODE. zoro going lol must be rough having a captain like that I get it and Killer going What Do You Mean. He’s Perfect. i just know they’re so fucking annoying all the time. what did you do to my partner. my partner. partner

#one piece #ggp #kidkiller #love letter to these shit heads

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kitakami-kid · 2 months

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GWOHHH I GOT CAUGHT UP ON SCHOOL STUFF SO I FORGOT ABOUT THE APPLIN THING LOL- so here it is... almost 3 hours late, sorry!

First of all, I'd like to thank everyone who joined again! It really makes me happy that anyone participated at all. I loved all of the submissions, but this is a contest so they will be ranked.

3rd place

@basilcatchup 🎉🎉🎉

I've said it before, but the composition of this piece is very good! They're all arranged nicely and all the applins seem to have their own personality. (I especially love the hydrapple to the right. He's getting silly and he doesn't even have a license!) The little speckles and textures are also a nice touch! Overall, pretty great!

2nd place

@symphonypikachu 🎉🎉🎉

This piece is so pretty! The characters are well proportioned and posed, the shading is great, and I love the texture! Adding a background definitely gives you extra points, and you did a really good job! Especially the sky, the different layers of blue and white are subtle, but beautiful!

HONORABLE MENTIONS

Before I get to the first winners, we should also recognize the other entries for this contest!

@a-plethora-of-midnight-roses 🎉🎉🎉

First of all, I'd like to say that hydrapple looks sick as fuck with those choice specs. He looks like he's about to shoot a 252spatk all-out fickle beam with helping hand against a 0spdef/0hp level 1 noibat, guaranteed OHKO. Adding a Hydreigon to the fray is super cute since they're both little dragons who grow up to be hydras. Very silly :3

@thesillyexpresser (idk why but tumblr isn't letting me tag you so I hope you still see this lol) 🎉🎉🎉

@glitchpunkz 🎉🎉🎉

Again with the adorable art! I really love the implication that Kieran might've doodled the porygon-z on the league club white board, so this just takes it a step further. The facial expression, the shadows, and the other little things on the whiteboard make this very fun to look at!

So without further ado...

1st place

OHHHH.... I ADORE this fic! Watching those two idiots give each other signs and completely missing it despite doing the same things is very in-character. This fic is so darn cute, I think it would even overwhelm Lacey. I enjoyed this piece in its entirety, and you all should go read it!

CONCLUSION

It's been fun to look at all this art, and I hope you three winners enjoy your shiny applins! Let me know if I should do more shiny giveaways, and if it should be a contest or a raffle. Winners dm me so we can work out when these trades will happen. This concludes the shiny applin contest!

#long post #ApplinsToApplins #pokemon

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goatanarchy · 1 year

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Trying to metagame a good reason for why my warden would make Alistair the king and I came to a conclusion that they are just really horrible friends to each other. Neither of them wants to make the big decisions and it shows.

your honor, they are idiots

#look LOOK I dont know how to play power fantasy where I have to lead so many people XD #and NOT get stressed about it?#sarikh surana #alistair theirin #dragon age origins

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aquariansarehumanitarians · 2 years

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In conclusion??? They’re all idiots, your honor. Every last one of them

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andypantsx3 · 1 year

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Similar to the Todoroki ask, how do you write Bakugou 💀, I feel like the way you write him is very much in character of him. Your portrayal of him is definitely my favourite. Do you have any tips? THANKS :)))

Lmao once again I am honored you would trust me with this!! Omg I for sure do not write Bakugou nearly as well as some other writers in this fandom--I really feel like Bakugou in particular attracts some of the more character-driven authors because he's just like, an absolutely immaculately written character on his own.

But once again I can offer you the things that I personally do when I write him, and you can kind of pick and choose what might work for you depending on the kind of story you want to tell.

Technique-wise, Bakugou for me is all about power words. Everything he does, I make him do with force--he kicks open the door, he throws himself down in his chair--even when he's still, you get the sense that he's seconds away from blowing a hole in something. I'll always go for like the most exaggerated synonym for his actions possible, and try to come up with ways to communicate tension even when he's not doing anything.

Plot-wise, I like to shape the story around what I see as some of his strengths as a character: deeply apparent flaws (lol hear me out), and tsundereness lmao.

Canon Bakugou is such an interesting character specifically because of all the problems he has. He's short-tempered, he's desperate to prove himself, he misinterprets things and communicates so ineffectively, especially at the beginning of BNHA. I like to tie at least one of those things into any story involving Bakugou--that's why they are so often enemies-to-lovers romances, because he and Reader fundamentally misunderstand each other, and I will make it all Bakugou's fault.

I also really like what a total tsundere he is--especially in more recent chapters, you can tell that what he says doesn't match how he feels. He'll yell at Mina and Denki for trying to stuff him into the Christmas outfit, but ultimately let them do it. He'll go berserk on the Todorokis for involving him in their family drama, but he'll crop up in Shouto's room after the ~reveal~ to talk about Shouto's feelings about it. So I like to play this aspect of his character up in my fics too--make him call Reader an idiot but kiss her, make him claim to loathe Reader but protect her, etc etc. It's words vs actions with this dude.

Dialogue-wise, Bakugou is super distinct. He's got a foul mouth and he knows how to use it, so all of the dialogue I give him is abrasive or smug, even in some of the more intimate moments. With Bakugou, I always give him a nickname for Reader that is slightly condescending--"princess", brat", etc--and those always get tossed around a lot.

He gets a swear word in basically every line, and he makes a lot of very direct statements, like "I'm not taking care of this brat," or "That nerd couldn't do shit anyway," like he has always reached a decisive conclusion. Even when he phrases things like a question, he'll really just be using it as a tool to advertise his own opinion--"Anyone tell you you've got a mouth on you?" or, "You think I'm your fucking maid service?"

He also gets a bunch of contractions--it's never "I am not," it's always "I'm not,"--and I also give him the occasional elision too, where words get cut up into shorter sounds like "'S not my fault," instead of "It's not my fault," or "You fuckin' wish," instead of "You fucking wish." Lastly, he also gets a bunch of dialectic tics and sounds, like "Oi," or "tch" if he's being judgmental.

A lot of writers do different things with his dialect, though, and some writers have written really successful, like, softer-sounding Bakugou too, so I'd appreciate any tips from those writers!!

#ask andie

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cryoculus · 1 year

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— reparations 05 ⟢

i have a very marketable skill called “jumping to conclusions”

★ FEATURING; arataki itto x gn!reader

★ WORD COUNT; 4.6k words

★ TAGS; modern au, flower shop au, slow burn, idiots to lovers, tooth-rotting fluff, mutual pining, no smut, sfw

★ NOTABLE CHARACTERS; arataki itto, thoma, kamisato ayato, kamisato ayaka

★ MASTERLIST . AO3 ★

“I can’t believe I wasn’t here when he did the thing. What kind of father am I?!”

You’re in the middle of shaping the bonsai you have on display when Itto sulks behind the counter—chin propped on top as he watches the silk white cocoon inside Itto the Fourth’s jar. You roll your eyes.

“Well, if you spent your precious time being here for his milestones in life instead of canoodling with the yakuza…”

“Nope! You are not guilt-tripping me out of this, master!”

“Wasn’t counting on it,” you scoff.

So, as things might have it, after placing your late-night order at Shimura’s, you and Itto decided to lounge in the shop to wait for the food. But the moment he sat down on your swiveling seat, the gang leader refused to take his eyes off the caterpillar-turned-chrysalis that was Itto the Fourth. You actually forgot to bring up that it was finally one step closer to the next phase of its insect life given all the commotion that occurred over the last hour. But your patient didn’t seem to mind the delayed info.

“Say,” you begin, putting down your shears as you flash him a pointed look. “If you won’t tell me exactly what’s going on, can I at least know how you got on the yakuza’s bad side in the first place?”

Itto hums, craning his neck to meet your gaze. “Eh? Ain’t that the same thing?”

“Don’t think about it like that! Your origin story is different from your current predicament, you know.”

And then Itto makes a motion of pinching his thumb and index finger together before sliding it across his lips like a zipper—shaking his head petulantly. What a damn kid.

To his credit, Itto may be idiotic about eighty percent of the time, but he’s still pretty sharp. You’re not sure if he’ll even spill the details once the entire ordeal is over. You can almost hear your mother chiding you for nosing into another person’s business, but what the hell is so important that Itto would have to (literally) break his back for the sake of it? A lifetime supply of yakisoba? A printed certificate that says ‘Arataki “The Yakuza Boss” Itto’? The longer you wallow in your own thoughts, the wilder your imagination runs, so you decide to spare yourself the trouble.

As you get back to your feet, you peek behind the blinds you drew at closing time, wondering when your food is going to arrive. Though it’s only been ten minutes since you placed your order, you were beyond starved. However, there don’t seem to be any delivery motorcycles in sight. Guess your dinner isn’t arriving miraculously early.

“Is there anything I can do to make you tell me?” you ask out of the blue, turning your head to Itto, who is now comfortably leaning against the backrest of your chair. “Beating you in an onikabuto battle? An eating contest? Rock-paper-scissors?”

Yeah. You’ve totally lost it. You don’t even know why you’re trying so hard to get it out of him. It’s none of your business! Repeat until true!

“Those are quite the honorable choices, if I do say so myself.” He laughs, cracking his fingers together. “But not even a mountainload of mora can get me to disclose the details. And that’s saying something ‘cause I’m kinda broke right now, but who cares!”

You do a double-take on that one. “Wait, you’re broke?”

“Hm? Is that so hard to believe?”

You’re quick to stride back to the counter, placing a palm in front of him as you shoot Itto an incredulous stare. “The rent in this place is forty thousand yen a month. Rent that I pay to your gang. Your gang, who owns this property. Did you just happen to forget that?”

“Oh, yeah…”

“Shinobu doesn’t let you handle any of the money, does she?”

“Um… No, she does not.”

“Then how the hell have you been getting by all this time?” you nearly shout, throwing undecipherable hand gestures everywhere. “I-I don’t even pay you—”

Itto effectively cuts off your rambling by pressing a finger to your lips, making your eyes go wide as he shushes you. He meets your gaze earnestly, and only speaks once you’ve completely gone silent.

“I know you’re my master and I still have tons to learn from you when it comes to gardening or whatever. But lemme tell you this: you need to learn how to chill.” He says every word so slowly, it’s as if he’s talking to a prepubescent teenager. “Look at me! Barely escaped with my life back there, but I’m bonding with Itto the Fourth ‘cause the situation calls for it. Sometimes, you gotta adapt to strange environments, y’know?”

Chill. Right, yeah. Chill. A.K.A., something that you were already lacking the moment Itto didn’t step through the front door on the first day of his leave. And now he barges into your home, passes out, makes you treat both his wounds and him to dinner. Where the hell are you supposed to get a decent supply of goddamn chill?!

“Gee, why didn’t I think of that?” you balk sarcastically, slapping his hand away. “Thank you, Arataki. You just solved half the world’s problems with unsolicited advice.”

To your absolute joy, he chuckles aloud, looking way too pleased with himself. “You’re too kind! Some of my boys said I should start writing for an advice column in the daily newspaper. What do you thi—”

All of a sudden, Itto’s cheery voice cuts to the thick silence of the shop. He stills, rising to his full height as rusty amber eyes do a cautious sweep around the room. You’re about to ask what’s gotten into him before the man before you promptly has all the color drained from his face, as if having realized something drastic.

“Tsk, he’s coming...” he mutters, and for a moment, you momentarily mimic the shock on his face. Who’s coming? Those fuckers that hazed him?

“Itto—”

“Yo, I’m going to, uh…” he trails off, grabbing Itto the Fourth’s jar before tucking it beneath his arm. The gang leader jams a thumb over his shoulder with a wobbly smile. “Hide in your room for a sec. Is that okay with you?”

“What?” You scowl. “Are you just going to leave me to entertain those lunatics alo—hey!”

Not even securing your explicit permission, Itto bolts back up to your apartment with his stupid hibernating caterpillar—leaving you right in the dust. The room is silent, save for the erratic thrum of your heartbeat that’s making you feel a little psyched out. Should you call the police? But if the person (people?) that Itto sensed was dangerous, surely he wouldn’t leave you to deal with them for him, right? But then again, cooking up assumptions about your unwitting apprentice was a common mistake that you’re growing tired of making.

Your instincts jolt to life when you hear three knocks on the front door of the shop, making your heart plummet to your stomach.

It takes you a moment to realize you’re locked in another game of ‘Guess Who’s on the Other Side’. This time, it could either be A.) Itto’s assailant(s) or B.) the food delivery guy. Though your hunch was wrong about Tora’s sudden appearance in the balcony, you were pretty damn sure this can only be one or the other.

Calm down, you tell yourself. Sure, Itto isn’t the best at keeping his temporary employment here all that discreet, but surely the yakuza won’t try to drag you into their problems. You’ve got nothing to do with all that!

With a clean conscience, you breathe deep, compose yourself, and open the door.

“And here I thought you’d gone straight to bed.”

When you see who it is, your jaw nearly unhinges itself from your skull and lands on the floor. How the fuck can you be so wrong twice in the same night?!

“A-Ayato?” you stammer, but he’s already letting himself in—shrugging off the coat off his shoulders as he marvels at the state of your shop. “Lovely place you have here,” he comments. “I might send in an order or two pretty soon since Ayaka has been gushing about your bouquets non-stop.”

You can’t even be bothered to feel flattered at the promised revenue because you’re processing the presence of not just one, but three people that have entered your shop past closing time. Ayaka and Thoma followed suit right after the force of nature that is Kamisato Ayato, but thankfully these two look a bit more apologetic.

“You weren’t picking up any of our calls,” Ayaka sighs, stuffing her phone in her handbag and unraveling the scarf around her neck. “We thought you might’ve been in trouble.”

Calls…? As in, plural? Shit. You left your phone upstairs after that strange, heart-to-heart conversation with Itto on your balcony. You hadn’t bothered checking it since you finished patching him up. But you attempt to mask your surprise by shifting everyone else’s attention to Thoma instead.

“I told you something just came up, right?” you sigh. “Why’d you go ahead and let Ayato-nii march all the way here just to see if I’m fine?”

The blond chuckles, already sounding defeated. “We all know when waka’s got something set on his mind, there’s no stopping him.”

Well…that is true.

You guess there’s no use trying to point fingers now that the Kamisato trio was here, so you just tell them to get comfortable instead. Thank Archons Itto suddenly rushed upstairs (for reasons that still eluded you). It’s going to be pretty hard to explain what a shirtless gang leader is doing waiting for late night takeout with you to these guys. Even if the four of you have been through weirder shit in the past.

“Has business been faring well?” Ayato asks, carefully draping his fingers across the bonsai you were just trimming earlier.

You nod. “Uh, yeah! So far so good. The people here in Hanamizaka have been sweet and accommodating. Didn’t really expect that in a place handled by the Arataki Gang.”

For some reason, the older Kamisato raises an eyebrow at that and you internally panic. Fuckfuckfuckfuck. Was bringing it up a bad idea? Nahhhhh, Ayato couldn’t possibly know about Itto’s temporary post here. You aren’t even sure if Ayaka knows since Thoma isn’t really a snitch. You should be safe. Maybe.

Then, you hear a loud noise coming from upstairs.

Ayaka glances over to the stairwell curiously and you bite the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from actually screaming. Yep, entertaining these three and kicking them out ASAP should be your main priority right now. Close college friends plus big brother or not.

“What was that?” Ayato wonders.

“I-It’s probably just Mikan,” you laugh nervously. “She’s been really hyperactive lately. Turns the place upside down whenever she isn’t asleep hahaha!”

He looks, by no means, convinced of your reasoning, but thankfully Ayato plays along and decides to drift over to your beloved succulent rack. “Oh, I nearly forgot. Ayaka, Thoma, we were…informally invited to the wedding of one of the daughters of the branch families. I say informally because the ceremony is still in its planning stages.”

“Is there any reason you’re telling us this in advance as well?” Thoma asks.

“Mmm, well I heard the bride-to-be, who is one of our cousins, is going to wed a commoner from the city,” Ayato elaborates. “A commoner who suggested that this flower studio is going to take charge of the necessary arrangements for the wedding.”

You take a moment to process that, vaguely remembering a job your mother told you to look out for the last time you were home. “...Do you mean Andou-san?”

For the past few weeks, you were so preoccupied with keeping Itto in check that you completely forgot all about it. But who knew Andou’s fiancée was from a Kamisato branch family? Huh, small world.

“Forgive me, I’m not very good with names, but when our cousin bought up your store in today’s lunch meeting, I just felt the need to bring you three together again.” Ayato laughs softly as he picks up one of the tiny potted succulents, casting a cheery stare at his present audience. “Just like old times, yes?”

“Nii-sama, the three of us have always kept in touch,” Ayaka sighs. “Is there anything else you’d like to talk to them about?”

The older man hollers, setting down the succulent as he raises his hands in surrender. “Oh, fine, fine. You caught me. Another reason why I wished to catch up with our dear friend is…this funny story told to me by one of my secretaries.”

“One of your secretaries?” you repeat.

Ayato nods. “She lives around this area. Told me she was walking home after sorting out some documents at the estate in Yougou Heights when she walked past Sakura Street and… Realized a motorcycle crashed into this very same shop! Shocking, is it?”

…Count on Ayato to express his concern in the most backwards way possible. You can feel your tongue turning sandpaper dry as your eyes discreetly rivet back to Ayaka and Thoma—two people you kept in the dark about the night you first met Arataki Itto. They exchange puzzled looks almost in unison, which means this is probably the first time Ayato brought the matter to their attention.

“Crash?” you chuckle, gesturing around the shop. “Does this look like a place that’s been trashed by a motorcycle, Ayato-nii?”

“Well, now that you mention it, that certainly doesn’t seem to be the case,” he hums thoughtfully. “But I couldn’t help but wonder…especially when Thoma over here told us about your lively helper. Arataki…was it?”

Fuck. He’s on to you. Ayato is soooo on to you.

“Oh, yeah. Itt—uh, Arataki. That’s his name. Y’know, the gangster.”

“From what I heard, that man is kind of a bum,” Ayato remarks warily, folding his arms. “Yet he’s working here?”

“Yeah, ‘course he is!” you reply a bit too quickly. “That guy um, takes odd jobs whenever money’s starting to get tight so I’m just helping out. It’s only for a few weeks.” Shot in the dark. You still don’t know how Itto’s made it this far without a stable job, on top of those weird allusions to a life in prison he’s yet to speak to you about.

“So where is he now?”

As if the man in question wishes to answer Ayato’s inquiries for himself, yet another crash resounds from upstairs. Holy shit. You are going to rip Itto to shreds once you’re done dealing with Ayato. Could he be any more goddamn obvious?!

“Mikan, stop messing with the furniture!” you yell (somewhat) convincingly. “A-Anyways, that guy is on leave right now. So if you’re looking for him, you might have to contact his deputy, Shinobu instead.”

“Do you need help rounding up your cat or something?” Thoma offers. “You always count on me to calm her down, remember?”

The mere suggestion is enough to send you into cardiac arrest. “Nope! It’s fine. Mikan’s just going through it is all. She’ll calm down eventually.”

“Is that why you weren’t able to have dinner with us?” Ayaka shoots you a worried look. “I know a well-practiced vet from Watatsumi Island. Would you like me to give you his card?”

“Hey, come on!” you groan—feeling all sorts of pressured from their kind suggestions. Gods, you can only imagine how much these three were going to fuss if they found out that Itto’s crashing stunt was actually true. “You have all got to chill. We haven’t gotten together in nearly a year, and you guys choose to spend the time worrying? How about we call it a night for now and let’s just…hang out this weekend! How’s that sound?”

Ayato starts to stroke his chin contemplatively. “Hm, I did ask my secretary to free up my schedule next week. Business trips drain the life out of a man, if you kids only knew.”

“Nii-sama, you’re only three years older than us.”

“Ah, the ignorance of youth is bliss I can no longer attain.”

“They’re right, though,” Thoma, thank Archons, agrees with you, straightening the collar of his own jacket with an apologetic smile. “We’ve already imposed too much. Let’s all just continue this on the weekend. Should we meet you here?”

The last bit was directed at you, to which you respond in turn. “Sure. I promise I won’t stand you guys up anymore.”

“We’ll hold you to that then,” Ayato huffs, digging into the pocket of his trousers before tossing something in Thoma’s direction. Fortunately, the blond is dextrous enough to catch it mid-air. “Go take Ayaka back to the car. I’ll just put down a few orders I’d like our dear friend to make for me.”

Thoma nods without question, twirling Ayato’s keys around his index finger as he and Ayaka exchange farewells with you. Though, you try not to think about how your best friend’s stare lingers on you a tad longer than usual.

When the door shuts behind the two of them, Ayato paces around the shop for a few moments more. Though you’re sure as hell he was just stalling, you can tell that the fondness in his eyes as he surveys each shelf is anything but fake.

“So my office back at home has been looking very dull to me as of late,” he laments. “The rainforests of Sumeru are quite a refreshing sight, and I’d like to emulate the scenery, no matter how minimal, inside my workspace. That’s why I wanted to ask which decorative pieces you recommend for the setting I have in mind.”

You rack your mind for a catalogue of tropical plants that could suit Ayato’s tastes right then and there, feeling a bit proud of yourself to have earned his favor. “Let me see, uh, Monstera plants make for good minimalist decorations in the office, Ayato-nii. I actually have some displayed right…here.”

Wandering around the rows of shelves, you show Ayato a miniature version of the lush green plant that seemingly has holes on its leaves. “This is what they actually look like. They didn’t get attacked by pests or anything.”

“Oho, these are exactly what I saw by the riverbanks.” He nods. “I’ll have someone pick up, hmm, five of these within the week along with a check for the payment. Just text me the invoice after.”

“Sure thing.”

You’d be lying if you say you weren’t expecting him to sneak in something else in such a casual conversation about the items you have on sale. If there’s anything you know best about Kamisato Ayato, it’s that he likes to keep his intentions tucked discreetly between two different pages of a book—so that only those who are meant to know their meaning can read between the lines. But as you quietly see Ayato out of the shop, you wonder if it’s actually possible for him to do things without an underlying motive beneath all that pretense.

“A shame that you weren’t able to sample Komore Teahouse’s special dinner sets tonight,” he sighs, raising a hand to pat your head affectionately as he puts his coat back on. “But we all have lives to live and other matters to attend to at times. Just make sure you show up on Saturday, yes? You promised~”

“Yes, Ayato-nii. I promise.” You spare him a hearty laugh, wrapping your arms around Ayato tenderly. The years you spent growing older alongside him and his siblings always makes you feel like you were part of their family, too. Well, Ayato did say to never hesitate calling them your family once, and you’ve always done as told.

“Can you promise me one more thing?”

Pulling away, you meet his silver-eyed gaze with brows raised. “What is it?”

He gazes at you with a tinge of seriousness for the first time tonight, one hand placed on top of your shoulder. Ayato opens his mouth, as if raring to speak his mind, but the moment you anticipate his words, they never come.

“...Forget it. I might be speaking out of turn,” the older man sighs, smiling sheepishly to himself. “Just—take care of yourself. Your future’s looking quite alright here in Hanamizaka, but I hope you know it won’t hurt to be more cautious.”

“You sound just like my dad, it’s kind of creepy,” you joke, patting his hand with yours. “Got it. Now, shoo! Ayaka and Thoma are probably waiting for you in—”

“Shimura’s delivery!”

Startled, you glance over at a man whose motorcycle is parked by the curb—the familiar Shimura’s logo printed brightly on the delivery box behind him. You can practically feel the day’s fatigue evaporate from your body at the sight of it.

“I’m the one who placed the order!” you say, waving him over. But as the delivery man scrambles over to where you stand, Ayato flashes you a minute nod—one you return with a warm smile that doesn’t falter even when he’s already walking away.

“Late night special for—” the delivery man practically announces to the whole neighborhood as he squints at the receipt in his other hand. “Arataki Itto?”

Again, you feel your entire body seize up at the mention of his name. You whip around to the direction Ayato headed when he finally made his leave, chest threatening to burst. He hasn’t gotten far yet, and the possibility of him having heard what this mouthy delivery guy just said is more likely than not. But Ayato doesn’t look back. In fact, he just keeps his strides forward as if he heard nothing at all.

“Yeah,” you respond to the man in front of you with a queasy smile. “That’s our order alright…”

“Well that took long enough!”

You don’t even have the energy to snap at Arataki once you make it back to your apartment, carefully setting down your food on the now-tidy coffee table. Huh. Did he clean up while you were downstairs or something? Only the remote to your TV and Itto the Fourth’s pickle jar littered the surface.

“What took long enough?” you sigh. “The food or me getting rid of my impromptu guests?”

Itto snorts from where he’s sitting cross-legged on your sofa. Thankfully, he’s now wearing a shirt but it seems a few sizes too—wait, is that your old pep rally shirt? “Duh! I was talkin’ about aniki. I have the patience of a mother when it comes to food, mind you. But when that guy’s in the vicinity, ohhhh boy! I’m not really ready for my 781st loss yet. I hope you understand why I had to run with my tail between my legs. Don’t tell him that, though. He’ll laugh at me.”

No matter how much you try to make sense of what the hell Itto was saying, you’re way too famished to think. So you decide to fill your poor stomach with something to eat first before asking questions.

The scent of chili oil and steamed dimsum makes your mouth water as you pop one into your mouth, chewing happily as you watch Itto wolf down his own very late dinner beside you. It feels a little strange, having a meal with someone on a couch you’ve only shared with Mikan, but the change isn’t unwelcome. Even if he probably broke into your room to steal your clothes.

“So, this aniki person you mentioned,” you start, quietly slurping your fried noodles. “Are you…talking about Ayato-nii, by any chance?”

“Eh?” Itto stares at you, putting down his chopsticks before bracing his palms on his knees. “You know aniki, too?”

“Well, yeah. He’s the older brother of one of my best friends,” you inform him. “How do you know him?”

“Haha! It’s a long story, master. One that’s best told over drinks and not fast food takeout. But I’m sure I can convince ya to go out drinking with me sooner or later.”

“Do you even have the mora for that?”

“Ahh, no. No, I don’t. That’s why you’re footing the bill as usual.”

“You’re really fucking thick-skinned, you know that?”

Once the two of you have finished bickering over interchanging topics in the span of thirty minutes, you clean up after your food. Itto actually has the decency to help you dispose of everything that needs disposing, as if he isn’t sporting any healing injuries at all. You try not to laugh at how comical it looks for him to lug a trash bag down the stairwell of your apartment wearing your pep rally shirt-turned-crop top. It’s either this guy has zero self-awareness or he seriously does not give a fuck. You’re not really sure which one it is.

“So, can I sleep on the couch?” Itto asks once he gets back, wiping the sweat off his brow.

A pause.

“What? You’re sleeping here?”

“Of course I am!” he says. “I can’t exactly show up at our home base looking all jacked up like this, now can I?”

“Well, you can’t just volunteer your employer’s couch as a temporary stronghold either, wise guy!” you scowl, kicking him in the shin as you retrieve your phone. A quick scroll across the lock screen clues you in on the several missed texts and calls that your friends made earlier, and—damn. You should really keep this thing on you all the time.

“You’re kicking me out just like that?” He pouts, and god, it’s such an atrocious look on him that it makes you want to hurl. But then again, it’s already, what, one in the morning?

If you evict him now, Itto would probably just go back to those assholes that hurt him instead of swallowing his pride and letting his gang see him like this. Which will give you more problems than if you just let the guy sleep over for one night. Dammit!

The gods better be looking down on you with favor right now.

“Fine. Do you need any blankets or something?”

“Nah, s’fine. They don’t give you blankets in prison, so.”

“...Remind me to do a background check on you tomorrow?”

“Hehe, now why would I do that?”

You let out a long, long sigh when you shut the door to your bedroom. Itto assured you that he’d hold down the fort and beat up anyone who tries to rob you in the dead of night while you slept. A promise that’s equal parts reassuring and terrifying but you’re frankly too exhausted to think about it too much.

To your surprise, Mikan is already inside your room. But she seems to be preoccupied by something—

A gasp flees your lips when you see one of the photos you have propped up on your nightstand on the floor, lying face down with a couple of glass shards littering the floor. Mikan mewls once she notices you draw near, pawing at some of the fragments as you pick up the frame with careful hands.

It’s a picture of you and your dad at your junior high graduation day, but the protective glass sheen was smashed to pieces. Thankfully, the photo didn’t seem to suffer any damage.

“Did you do this?” you ask Mikan, to which she replies with a sharp cry that makes you chuckle. “Yeah… Just messing with you.”

That night, you think of two things as you slowly drift off to slumber. The first is: what did Ayato want you to promise? It’s really not like him to cut himself off mid-sentence like he did earlier. You’re going to try and bring it up again this weekend, if chance permits you.

As for the second thing…

“Why the hell would he do that?” you whisper to no one in particular, one arm draped across your eyes. In your mind, you imagine a statuesque man with strange tattoos standing over the broken picture frame—a disdainful look distorting his usually vigorous smile.

For once, you decide to sweep the dust under the rug, where no one else can hope to find it.

← previous | next →

★ UPDATE SCHED; every thurs & sat (12 nn gmt+8)

#genshin impact #genshin smut #genshin fluff #arataki itto smut #arataki itto fluff #genshin x reader #arataki itto x reader #genshin headcanons #genshin scenarios #genshin fanfic #genshin fanfiction #reparations #cryoculus

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cosmicjoke · 6 months

Note

there’s this specific group of eruri shippers on twitter that i had to mute/block bc of their takes on levi’s character, especially now with the final episode releasing. as another anon previously said, some of them are trying so hard to prove levi only cared about erwin and erwin only (stating, for example, that levi never cared that annie killed his squad bc he let her join them in the final battle (same with gabi), meanwhile he’s sooo angry with zeke purely because he killed his ‘love’), it’s like they don’t want to understand his character at all😭 or as if levi being compassionate and caring towards other people will ruin/threatens their ‘canon’ ship. even levi’s conclusion is being criticized by some, because how dare he give children candies when he should be mourning erwin like mikasa is mourning eren, or he should do x thing because erwin would’ve liked it, like…. let that man be his own person. i’m sorry if this is repetitive, because i know you get asked quite a lot about these things specifically😭 i enjoy your content a lot and the way you analyze levi’s complexity as a character

Jesus, that's... lame as hell, lol. Levi shouldn't get to be happy because he should spend the rest of his life pining after Erwin? Really? lol. I'm sorry, that's actually kind of funny, it's so pathetic. What's wrong with these people? They're angry because the canonical ending is directly contradicting their fantasy about Levi and Erwin. If Levi isn't paralyzed by his grief for his "lover" then it's the wrong ending for him, lol. I swear, you can't make this shit up.

I've gone over the stupidity of people criticizing Levi for not being angry at Annie, or not protesting Annie working with them. The world was on the verge of being destroyed, all of humanity wiped out, and yet Levi's supposed to be petty enough to complain about Annie lending them a hand in a desperate fight because she killed his squad? It just shows these people don't understand AT ALL who Levi is, or what he was fighting for. The same thing applies to their claims about Levi being "angry" at Zeke. They don't understand at all why Levi wanted to kill Zeke. They think it was for revenge, but it never was. It was to honor his fallen comrades by giving their deaths meaning. He promised to kill Zeke in return for them giving their lives. And they want Levi to also hate Gabi now too, I guess. That's cute. Yes, it would make Levi such a badass if he were to forever hold a grudge against a twelve year old little girl.

If these people took even a moment to listen to themselves and how they sound, they would realize what idiots they looked like to everyone else.

#Levi Ackerman

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aizenat · 7 days

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Black women irritate me with how they have conversations about things. Megan James is apparently trying to make a baby with her boyfriend and someone pointed out how wild that is she’s setting herself up to be a baby moms (she’s on basketball wives, lol. Why are we expecting better from her?) and so all these Black women are making tik toks about how being a baby moms sucks (girl I know) and shit and like ok but then it devolves into “why are we teaching girls to be baby moms instead of wives” and “we need to prioritize being wives” and shit.

And it’s like oh! So close! Wanna try again?

They’re like republicans in that republicans will see an issue with our society and systems of power and believe that it needs to change and you’re like hell yeah brother let’s get this revolution started and their revolution looks like mass genocide to create a white ethnostate and it’s like nooooo that’s not the answer! Their conclusions are just so ass backwards.

First off, there is so no such thing as choosing the right man because any man is a danger/threat. I cannot tell you how many tik toks and reddit posts I’ve seen of women 30-50ish years old talking about how they married a good man who took care of her and was perfect only for him to one day decide he was over her and divorces or leaves her, neglects the kids, leaves her with no money or wealth, and leaving her forced to start from scratch at square one.

Hell, prioritizing “being a wife” as if that’s a prize is literally the mindset that led that “who tf did I marry chick” to end up ignoring all the red flags and rushing into marriage with that legion loser! She literally said that the biggest reason she ignored the red flags and acted like an idiot re: him was literally because she was determined to make this situation “her time.” Aka: her time to get married and be a wife. She wanted to be a wife so badly that she ignored obvious lies from this weirdo and married him despite barely knowing him.

The point is 1) don’t prioritize being a wife period because it’s a fucking trap; if you get married, cool but nbd if not and 2) your ability to reproduce is a fucking POWER. Not a gift or miracle or whatever the fuck but a fucking POWER. Fucking understand that. If a dude wants kids, he needs YOU! Not the other way around because you can have babies with anyone! But he can only have babies with someone who wants to have his babies! Women, and yes this includes Black women especially: YOU. ARE. THEE. MOTHERFUCKING. PRIZE! Not the other way around. So start treating your pussy and womb as such and stop having babies with men who haven’t shown proper respect and reverence to you! Stop having babies with dusty ashies that will drop you and leave you for some other chick to impregnate while you’re in the middle of labor. Fuck that.

It’s so annoying that these women use the convo of how to stop being baby moms to shame women for “choosing right,” as if that’s even a thing with choosing men lol, instead of reminding themselves and each other that men should be honored for you to be willing to have his baby. And if he’s not acting like it’s an honor, abort the fetus and leave his ass. PERIOD.

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messinwitheddie · 11 months

Text

Stan “Wait! I recognize you! Johnny? Johnny Screw Loose? It's really you? Wow, it's all coming back to me."

Nny “It’s coming back to me too... Oh God..."

Stan “Tough break. You were to young to go.”

Nny “That's all you have to say to me?”

Stan “NO… I missed you, kid.”

Nny “How DARE you?! You don't get to say that to me! Not after you abandoned me!”

Stan “Whoa, THAT is inaccurate. I told you exactly where I was going and why.”

Nny “You never specified when you were leaving! You didn't bother to say goodbye. You just gutted the shop overnight and disappeared!”

Stan “I offered to bring you with me to Oregon! Your exact words to ME were—

“Absolutely no way in Hell. I would rather hike from here to Yellowstone and attempt to castrate a live, fully-conscious bear with a rusty potato peeler than move with you to Oregon”.”

Nny “And I stand by that!!”

Stan “You can't help someone who doesn’t want your help!”

Nny “LIER! You didn't want to help me! I was No one to you! Nothing but a punching bag, a butt of many a cruel, corny joke, another idiot to exploit!!”

(To be continued)

[Have done nothing the past few days, but start several drawings and fail to finish them, but at least they're on the wip stack where I can circle back to instead of just cluttering up my brain. This is more or less the conclusion to the forgotten memories story that I've barely started. I write all these connected aus out of order; gotta stop doing that. When will I learn to honor chronology?

This I actually drew this out of order. The second page I slapped together earlier today in ball point pen to get into comic mode; it was my attempt at a warm up/ loosening my wrist. The first three panels I penciled before my shift starts. Everything about this is horrible, but it was just not horrible enough to post. (?)

That nightmare Nny is based off the one that appears in issue 4. I like that one, the nightmare Nny design and the one page comic he appears in. Don't see this design pop up much in fanart. ]

#jthm #gravity falls #nny #stan pines #crossover #forgotten memories #the seance #au #confrontation between two dead ex friends

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twilightknight17 · 2 months

Text

Yesterday on P3R: jumping to conclusions, the time-honored tradition of taking my pet to the movies, questionable decisions, and more Tartarus!

So when you take Koromaru on walks, you can run into your other social links and it’ll give you points. Which is good because my daytime social links are suffering. I’ve already figured out a rough idea of how I’m gonna have to play them the second time around.

...not yet I’m not, but Koromaru’s definitely a good start.

Akihiko goes to meet up with Shinji, who still doesn’t want to rejoin SEES after “what happened two years ago”. Which is apparently different from what happened to Miki, who they mentioned before. Shinji refers to seeing someone die, and Ken, who is eavesdropping, has a major reaction to hearing that.

He apparently comes to the conclusion that Shinji, who he didn’t know before now, is related to his mother’s death two years ago. Which seems… like kind of a leap? Obviously I haven’t gotten the full picture (even though I know what happened to Ken’s mom), but right now I’m kind of thinking that the movie handled this particular character bit better?

We’ll see, I guess. Meanwhile, thanks to Koromaru, I finally managed to max a social link! August is WAY too late to be only on my first one. X’’’’’D But I went into this blind, so I’m not surprised.

The film festival has been going on for like… two weeks now? I dunno. I keep ignoring people inviting me to the movies to try to get my social links up. Which. Honestly I probably should have been going to the movies, since my academics are STILL at a 4. I’m not even gonna be able to start Mitsuru’s link this round at this rate.

But I did go see a superhero movie with Junpei, and a ninja movie with Aigis. And I tried to take Koromaru to the movies, but…

Let him watch the movie, you monsters!!

After that failure, it’s back to Tartarus, because some other idjit has wandered in. And another cat.

Honestly, I’m willing to buy the cats, but:

1. How are these people wandering into Tartarus in the first place? Why are they at the school at night?

2. HOW DO THEY GET SO HIGH? This person was on like floor 102. HOW did you get up there without getting munched??? Even if I took out the gatekeepers there’s still other shadows everywhere???

Whatever. X’’’D Rescue mission successful, so back to social linking and puttering around the dorm.

Ikutsuki calls us all to a very important meeting to announce that Ken is joining SEES as our newest member!

Sir, that’s great and all, but that is a literal child. He is in elementary school. Mitsuru and Akihiko are uneasy (for two different reasons), and I can’t really blame them! Sure, Ken asked to join, but it’s Ikutsuki’s job as the responsible adult here to tell him that NO, he is not ALLOWED to go into the nightmare tower to fight deadly monsters!

Honestly, how did you even get a SEES uniform made for him so fast, Ikutsuki?

Junpei is spending his days hanging out and still trying to talk to the pretty girl at the station. He asks to see her drawing when it’s finished, even though she’s still being very aloof.

I think he’s being very nice, actually. She thinks he’s weird. XD

I check in with Maiko, who has had a long talk with her parents. They finally explained why they’re getting a divorce, and she’s sad about it, but she understands. If they had just explained from the start instead of getting mad and hitting her, we might have avoided a lot of shit.

She does mention, though, that she has to pick which of them to live with. I don’t like either of them, but at least her mom didn’t hit her??? I told her it was her choice, though, and she was good with that until she realized that her mom might be moving far away. Then she wouldn’t get to play with me anymore.

I want this kid to be happy so bad.

Somehow yet another idiot has wandered into Tartarus, and there’s only a few days left til the full moon, so I guess I’m going to get them. As soon as I went in, Ken asked to be in the main team, and like… Kid, I know you’ve got a spear taller than you are, but do you have any training at all???

He’s a bless-user, though, so… helpful.

Idiot retrieved, time to go home and--

I have been asleep for five minutes, Pharos. Please. I know the moon will be full in a week. It’s okay.

Junpei actually manages to introduce himself to the pretty girl, only to realize that her hand is bleeding. He promptly freaks out and tries to help her.

This completely confuses her. She literally calls him weird for being worried about her. But as she’s leaving, she tells him her name is Chidori, and that she’ll be done with her drawing soon if he wants to come back and see it.

There’s one free day left before going back to school, so I head to the mall to pick up some new armor on sale, as well as browse the stuff at the antique shop.

(I have forgotten what that lady wants for the aojiru quest so I’m gonna have to look that up because ughhhhhhh)

It’s interesting that the antique shop weapons focus more on the effect than straight power. But at some point, straight power is gonna outclass them. I think that--

...you know what, let’s just head out before I laugh the shop down.

None of my summer social links are ready to rank up, so rather than spending time with any of them, I’m gonna take my last free day and try out working at the blue store. For some reason I thought this was a spa, but it actually appears to be some kind of accessory/crystal healing shop.

No velvet in here, but it does offer you the ability to recall forgotten skills for your personas, so I guess the blue is still appropriate. And working here ups my charm and academics! Plus, I have the Temperance bonus, so I have to level up my academics now?

Right?

…right?

……Minato pls you just gotta cram a few more braincells in there I’m begging you. X’D We’re literally going back to school tomorrow, and summer school made you NO smarter than when we left. God. Why this. XDDDDD

#Li plays P3Re #Minato's terrible horrible no-good academics stat #(It's not actually that bad but ughhhhhhh)

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beevean · 9 months

Note

I'm absolutely betting money with you, sadly enough. And you are right that this also seems like a revamped and reused Archie plot, wherein Silver indeed accused members of the Freedom Fighters left and right with the crappiest evidence to go on. That panel of Sonic dragging him along the ground by his quills to a comatose Antoine in the hospital because Silver made such a fool of himself still puts a bad taste in my mouth :/ And he didn't even get to the correct person all by himself!

But I had at least a *little* bit of hope that Silver would be let down easily by the other Diamond Cutters (you know, in a "we appreciate you are worried but nothing is pointing towards it, but we'll look into it to ease your mind" supportive kind of way), but you are right in that everything is shaping up to be a cringefest of the highest order. Tangle's been heavily put through the mangle already in the past few issues, so a few crude and assholish foot-in-mouth comments from her are basically a given. Maybe Whisper is going to lose her temper and yell at him to show just how badly he screwed up, because the audience knows really bad things are happening when Whisper is yelling! And Lanolin seems bossy and authoritative enough to demand he leaves because the Diamond Cutters know better and whatever. And the worst part is fans *will* run with this interpretation of Silver's character to further shape him as Innocent Cinnamon Roll, Look At Him He's Got No Social Skills!! And it's not even something I disagree with (since Silver jumping to conclusions and being bossy did use to be part of his character), but not in a way where you know it'll just be used to make fun of him as opposed to creating good character interactions or growth. It just such an undignified, mocking way to present a character who to me is not at all cinnamon roll-like, but honorable and just.

Just... ugh. I'm glad I can air my grievances here, even if my hopes for an actual fun two issues about Silver are burying themselves right into the bedrock right now. (Sorry for the long essay!)

I feel your pain :\ if I were to make a list of the canon characters that got mangled in IDW, Silver would probably be fourth, behind Sonic, Shadow and Eggman. Not only he got turned into a round-eyed excitable babyboy ripe for mocking (hello Sonic calling him Flatware with a sarcastic bow), but now he's really going to be treated like an idiot both by the characters and the narrative :\

After how much of a killjoy Lanolin was towards Tangle in #61, she's absolutely going to snap at Silver and be a total ass to him, mark my words. And sure, why not, even more Whisper losing her cool, it's not like she literally screams and cry everytime she stubs her toe now.

You're right that Silver jumping to conclusions was part of his character. You can see the transformative process going from '06 (where it was the whole reason he briefly opposed Sonic but he was also capable of questioning himself), to Archie (where he's apparently such an annoying prick that even Sonic has enough of him, charming) to IDW (where he's just a dumb cinnamon roll). In Archie, I can assume that this portrayal was due to how unpopular Silver was at the time... but I can believe that in IDW they really think they're appealing to his fans because hey, they want Blorbo Silver!

Glad you feel comfortable to rant here ^^ eh, at least the Espilver annual was nice.

#fans don't look

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aries-writingblog · 1 year

Text

Enemy Fire: 10

Summary: There's a new kid in town, and she's got a city to usurp.

Pairing: Jason Todd × F. Reader

Word count: 2.5k

Warnings: language, weapons, threats, violence, stressed family relations, mentions of parental death (maybe a couple sentences)

AN: photos are from Pinterest

YN exhaled slowly, attempting to settle her nerves.

The cafe was mostly quiet— soothing music playing over the speakers, paired with the scent of coffee and tea mingled her senses.

It had been too quiet after the attack in the market. No raid on her apartment, no one gunned her down in the street. Not a single sign that said they were still there.

She had almost come to the conclusion that it had been some nightmarishly real terror. Some hallucination.

But she knew better. He taught her better.

‘Wait out your target. Make them nervous. Your patience will be what makes or breaks a kill.’

Her fingertips were numb as she clasped her cup of coffee. She knew why his methods were so effective, now.

YN scanned the cafe again. A businessman, speaking quietly on his cell phone. Two guys sitting in the corner, enjoying their time together. A college age girl with headphones on. Her hands steady typing on a laptop.

Taking a sip of her coffee, YN eyed the girl. It could’ve been her, she supposed. Graduated high school early, taken college classes, graduate with high honors. Go for a doctorate degree, perhaps.

She had been doomed from the start. Her circumstances were never the right ones for that child to grow.

“Hello, sweetheart.” YN froze. Her cup nearly slipped out of her grasp. Her knee jerked, her body working faster than her brain, already trying to escape. The man clicked his tongue, sliding into the seat across from her. “I wouldn’t move. There’s a sniper trained on you from across the street and your dear old pops doesn’t deal without holding.”

Something hard pressed against her kneecap, demanding her silence.

She was a fucking idiot. She should’ve taken more precaution— what the hell was she doing, drinking coffee out in public? YN leaned back against the booth, her lips settling into a line. Displeased with herself and the situation.

“You aren’t my father.” She snapped, her lip curling.

Adrian laughed; His smile was bright and easy, like he wasn’t holding a gun to her. Like he wasn’t threatening her.

Like they were truly father and daughter, sharing time over a coffee.

“I’m the closest thing your sorry ass has for a parent.” He corrected her.

She crossed her arms over her chest, her lips curving even further downwards.

“I don’t think parents hold their children at gunpoint. Or hire assassins to kill them.”

Adrian shook his head, reaching over to the bag of pastries. Fishing out a cookie, he snapped it in half and took a large bite.

“No, no, sweetheart, they weren’t meant to kill you. Just teach you a very valuable lesson.” He explained, chewing the remainder of the stolen treat.

YN shifted, finally gaining enough sense to put her cup back down on the table. Placing her palms face down before her, she straightened her spine.

A feeble attempt at making herself bigger than him.

“Who’s to say I don’t light this shit up right here and now, all just to burn you?” She hissed, leaning forward.

Adrian raised a brow.

After his brother met an unfortunate end, he decided to help his dear sister-in-law and niece. It had been quite a shock for the woman to learn of her husband’s brother. Once the initial shock and despair of losing her husband, but gaining another male figure, she accepted his offer of help.

But she was concerned about her daughter meeting new people.

When he met YN, her mother had warned him she might not accept him immediately. She had terrible trust issues, and just awful people skills.

But, the more he was around, the more he took note. She didn’t have terrible people skills. She just didn’t care. The empathy wasn’t there.

Sure, she handed out baskets to the poor, participated in food drives and donated. She never used her powers in public spaces if she could help it.

Her mother had made such a point about teaching her daughter the correct path. Guiding her down a path of a good spirit. Because she knew, deep down in her kind heart, that her daughter would always be hunted because of her abilities. And her daughter could not differentiate good or evil without being told.

She had always been the same. Apathetic. Disinterested. She wouldn’t change. She couldn’t.

“You won’t.” He assured her. Not with her mother’s warnings so heavily in mind.

‘You’re different, sweetheart; They will chase and persecute you for these abilities. Even if you were doing the right thing, you will be blamed.’

YN glanced out to the cafe. It wasn’t badly crowded for the time of day, but soon, it would be. Schools would be let out in thirty minutes. But there were still people around. People she shouldn’t kill.

People who would point fingers and blame her for killing a man who does nothing but evil.

“I won’t be your weapon.” She shook her head, biting the inside of her cheek. “I know my worth now, Adrian, and it’s too high for you to pay.”

“Pay? Now that’s an interesting topic.” He agreed, his voice edged near furious. The click of the safety being taken off somehow echoed over the noise of the cafe. “Because you, my darling daughter, you were filtering money from my accounts. Enough to make a dent and for me to notice. That’s what the hunters were for. And my visit today.”

He was bluffing.

YN stared at his eyes. A glint sparked off the deep, rich, brown color of his irises.

Wasn’t he?

“What do you want?” She demanded.

“Either you come home today, with me, and I’ll reinstate you as the Jersey manager, or you walk away right now and I’ll have your head as payment for your crimes.”

“They weren’t crimes.” She protested through clenched teeth.

“They were to me.” He snarled, lowly.

The tension was thick and cloying. But she refused to back down.

Not anymore.

Even though her fingers were trembling and her skin felt like it was alight, she would not be under his thumb again.

“I’m not going anywhere with you.” She warned.

Adrian shrugged, wiping his fingers on a napkin. He reached over and snagged her drink. Sparing a precautionary whiff, he took a hesitant sip.

Strong notes of spices and dairy. All sugar, barely any coffee.

“Then you stay here and die by my hand.” He reasoned.

YN’s lips curled into a frown.

Adrian’s face didn’t move.

Clenching her hands into tight fists, she tilted her chin up. Anger curling into a ball in her belly. Sparking along all of her muscles.

“If you’re gonna kill me, you’d better do it now, while you still have a shot.” She advised, inching her foot closer to his, extending her kneecap. Welcoming the bullet.

He hummed at her faux bravery.

“No….” He answered. He turned to face the window, using his free hand, he held two fingers against the glass. YN swallowed, bracing herself for the bullets to penetrate the glass. They never came; Adrian dropped his hand. “No, I think I’d like to see you squirm first.”

Adrian pushed himself to his feet. Her eyes slipped down to his hand.

She wasn’t sure why, but seeing the handgun there was more unnerving than feeling it press to her skin.

He brought his hand up to the magazine, loosing it. He pushed a single bullet from it and let it clatter against the table.

Then, he turned and walked out.

YN’s breath left her lungs in a rush; Lightheadedness overtook her senses, leaving her with vertigo and nausea.

She hated that man.

She hated he made her feel like a kid again.

But she would not cry. She wouldn’t. She wouldn’t cry, or throw up, or scream— nothing. Her fingertips moved across the table shakily. Barely touching the cool metal of the bullet.

Rolling it into her fingers, she stared at the gold plated gunpowder. She stared at certain death.

The hairs on the back of her neck prickled. Straightening her spine, she glanced around.

She locked eyes with a man, standing across the cafe. Waiting for his name to be called.

He was staring right back at her.

A cruel scar curved upwards from his mouth, jagged across his cheek.

Fuck.

He pushed off the wall and started over to her table. YN turned her head to the window and blinked, rolling her eyes upward to prevent any tears from escaping.

He slowed to a stop at the booth table’s edge. Before he could speak, she turned back.

“Well, seems you’re getting your way after all, Todd.” She nodded to the booth seat across from her. “I need your help.”

“So, this Adrian guy is your…”

“Uncle. More of a ghost, nowadays. Runs a crime ring in New York.”

Jason hummed, tapping his fingers against his cup. YN shifted in her booth, her eyes moving constantly. But never landing on him, it seemed. They would flick behind him, to the shop’s entry, then to the windows, on the streets, then back into the shop to glare at patrons.

“And you were running Jersey for him until he caught you laundering?” Jason confirmed.

She had explained, in very minor details, as soon as he sat down, what kind of trouble was hunting her. Now, he was attempting to piece together the fragments he was able to catch from the rapid, one sided conversation.

YN tilted her head. She tapped the end of the bullet against the table. The metallic noise was muffled by her fingertips.

Would he ever believe her, even if she told the truth? Not that it mattered much. Her plans were shattered now.

“I was relocating funds for a necessary purpose.”

“Can I know what that purpose was?” He pressed.

YN frowned, her gaze switching between his different colored irises.

His face held a strange, masculine beauty. Thick, dark brows paired with equally dark lashes. Tanned skin and a mop of unruly black curls, his signature white streak flopped against his forehead.

His scar across his cheek, one sliced through his eyebrow. His eyes were the true beauty; Strange and uncommon. His left was a pale blue, the right was green with a sliver of blue.

He reminded her terribly of an alley cat. Someone who has lived too many lives all in a single lifetime.

“Care packages.” She admitted, finally lowering her eyes to the table. Fiddling more with the bullet, she kept her eyes focused on the gleaming gold. “Jersey has a decent sized homeless population. It’s only worse when there are crime rings.”

Jason took a long drink of his tea, his gaze never leaving her face. On his own, he doubted he could have ever guessed that information.

Dick had admitted to him he had seen her in the Narrows, giving out bags. She had apparently been doing it in New Jersey, too.

He hadn’t found much information on her— and he still wasn’t sure how she avoided his first facial search all those weeks ago. But once he had a full face, and access to the BatCave’s computers, he found her after a couple hours.

Granted, he only found a learner’s license, a fake passport, and a couple of past addresses.

But here she was, giving him more information. Willingly.

“And now he’s in Gotham.” He summarized.

“To kill me.” She confirmed.

Jason nodded once.

Her story was making more sense, and simultaneously, less sense. There were certain holes that he supposed were meant to be left unexplained. Her own insurance.

And as much as he hoped to have the full idea, he doubted she would give it up. Though, he would still try.

“So you were trying to stack defense here.” He clarified.

YN hummed, pushing her own cup around the table. It left a water trail of condensation.

“Until you started fucking up my plans.” She divulged. She clicked her tongue against her teeth. “Then he arrived earlier than I’d anticipated. Guess I was being predictable.”

Running from a guardian. Fighting against their grip.

That he had some experience with.

“What do you need me to do?”

She almost seemed surprised by his open offer. Not a backhanded, quid pro quo deal, no strings apparently attached.

“I need manpower.” She admitted, cautiously moving forward with his offer. Waiting for the shoe to drop. “You have control over the largest portion of Gotham’s rings. I just need some backup. And firepower.”

A deal. She seemed to have learned some things from her uncle.

Jason sat back, staring her down. YN didn’t waver. She kept her own gaze level. Giving no more information than she had to.

Finally, Jason sighed, running his tongue along his teeth.

“I don’t want a shootout in the middle of the street. Even at night, civilians are still around.” He explained, his arms crossing over his chest. “Besides, a broad attack won’t be good enough. You’re scrambling and he knows that now.”

YN growled, threading her fingers into her hair, pressing her elbows to the table. She took a moment, several deep breaths, regaining her control.

“What do you want me to do, then? I only have so many options.” She admitted.

He bit the inside of his lip.

He was taking away more and more of her options and not giving much in return. She was willing to do things his way, he couldn’t make her regret that.

A prominent buzz against his thigh drew his attention to the clock on the wall.

Shit.

He was dead. He was completely dead.

Pushing himself to his feet, Jason fumbled through his pockets for a pen.

“I have somewhere to be. I’ll give you my address, stop by tomorrow.” He instructed. Snatching a napkin, he scribbled out barely legible numbers with his initials at the bottom. He glanced back up, to see her doubtful face. Brows drawn together and eyes narrowed. “I’m not gonna kill you.”

“Sounds like what I’d hear just before I’m killed.” YN snipped, carefully pulling the napkin toward her.

“You have my word.” He promised.

A disbelieving laugh broke free, leaving her lips curled in a mimicry of a smile.

“That means jack shit.”

Jason huffed, rolling his eyes.

“What do you want me to do, handcuff us together?”

“No.”

He nodded, collecting his cup.

“Then you’ll have to find some morsel of trust in your shriveled little heart.”

“Jeez, I was joking. No need to go Rambo.” YN muttered, watching him back away from her booth.

“That goes both ways.” He added. “You’re not allowed to kill me, either.”

“Allowed?” YN questioned. It was too late to argue any further, as Jason had already ducked out of the doors and was headed down the street. The wind ruffled his hair, flapping at the hood of his sweatshirt. The black fabric stretched over his broad shoulders— YN scowled. “What a dick.”

She looked down at the napkin. An apartment? Now that was surprising. She figured someone that had the Red Hood as his alter ego, he would live somewhere more secure. More controlable.

YN hummed, the ever present crease forming between her brows again.

Tomorrow.

#jason todd x f!reader #jason todd x fem!reader #jason todd x you #jason todd x y/n #jason todd x reader #enemy fire

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