#it was all part of the strategy!! that was totally the ONLY reason they had for doing it like that

[monty-glasses-roxy]

Roxy and Bonnie unleashing the horde of mini music men upon Fazerblast during an active (not guests, just the animatronics) game

(The mini music men are fine, they have fazerblasters as well)

(This went on a bit so it's under a read more. I got carried away whoops! I've also tagged almost all the animatronics because they're all relevant okay stay with me on this)

Okay. So. My first thought was Bonnie getting Roxy involved under false pretenses and then getting the others involved by using her involvement as proof it was fair and totally not a prank... but honestly, he could never break Roxy's trust like that. She would be very upset with him whether it was fun or not. And that set-up would have led to a worse game and post overall so we're not doing that.

Moving on!

So they're both in on this. Bonnie came up with an idea to swarm the Fazerblast Arena with the Minis, but only a few actually like him, so he got Roxy in on it, who, once convinced it would be funny and a good game for everyone involved, got the word spread to all the Minis. Anyone that wanted to participate was to meet up with her and she'd make some makeshift laser guns for everyone and use some spare sensors and shit so they could properly play. She's done it a few times before with Bobbin, Poppet, Glowstick and Tippy, (the four she's closest with) but nothing on this scale before so it's gonna take some work.

Meanwhile, Bonnie spends this time convincing everyone else to join the game once it's ready. He admits to Roxy that he sorta used her involvement to convince them it wasn't some nefarious scheme, but honestly, so long as they know and are expecting the unexpected, she's fine with this. She wouldn't trust this notorius cheater and prankster with a new game either lmao. Bonnie also puts himself in charge of creating a new game program in the Fazerblast system so they can you know... make it playable on the system. His other task, comes before Roxy even agrees to this, or gets the Minis involved. He has to convince Freddy to let him and Roxy design a new Fazerblast game for everyone. With the beef between Freddy and Roxy that's a hell of a task, but Bonnie can be convincing and if Freddy will cave to anyone, it'll be Bonnie. He's committed enough. He'll get through to him soon enough.

So you have a team here! Bonnie is working to make it playable on the systems, and make it as entertaining as possible (and also trying to very heavily stack it in the Minis favour more than it already is) and Roxy is there to make sure it functions mechanically with the guns and shit, the Minis are getting their say (she trusts him but he has a habit of steamrolling the conversation so she's making sure that doesn't happen) and to make sure the game isn't horribly rigged. This is a pretty rare occurence honestly. Normally these two are knee deep in stupid shit, very often involving some of the others as well with no intent to get out of it lmao so when one of them actually pulls the breaks and thinks about it? Yeah you know it's gonna be fun. And also not likely to get them into trouble. Another, equally rare occurence.

Anyway, Bonnie succeeds in getting everyone involved, and as was Roxy's idea, Bonnie is put into the game too. He knows what to expect of course, but with Roxy behind the scenes directing a shit ton of the Minis with their own plans, they thought it would add to the confusion if Bonnie was also in there getting spooked and confused.

The game starts.

No one except Bonnie has any idea what's gonna happen once the game begins. Freddy, Bonnie, Chica, Monty, maybe Foxy if he's here too, and Sunny and Moon (still in one body of course) enter the arena. As per the plan, they understand that all they have to do is defeat Roxy. This part was Bonnie's idea of course. None of them have seen Roxy since she disappeared to get ready before the game. She's normally banned from the Fazerblast arena due to her eyes - and her and Freddy's personal beef - so they're not sure how Bonnie could possibly have convinced her to even want to play the game again. X-ray eyes are pretty unfair after all and Roxy hates that! He reassures them that it's gonna be fair and fun, but with the odds naturally stacked against them because Roxy is oh so good at this game! (Yes, he's building her up as best he can it's his favourite job to do)

There's a long period of them just sneaking around, not a lot happening. Bonnie was supposed to get them to split up, but Chica suggested it first. They don't know what these two have planned, but if Roxy is up to something cool, they're gonna need to split up to find her. The place is huge after all! So they split up. And suddenly it's a lot more scary.

With so many of the Minis, and Roxy now having control of the rarely used fog machines, the team are hearing quick footsteps in the mist, but can't tell where they're coming from. They hear the occasional item fall, or the thud of something bouncing off the wall. They're a little nervous to say the least!

They lure each half of the team to the two towers. Once they're both in position, the ambush begins! The Minis are suddenly on the attack! They scare the absolute shit out of everyone! Roxy is laughing her ass off above the maze, directing the Minis where to go and who to target. They've practiced this a few times, so it's going real smoothely. A little bit further in, with everyone having scattered from the attack, Roxy comes onto the intercom pretending to be the leader of the Miniature Spider Army and briefly explains the game to them, while also acting as if Bonnie is her traiterous advisor that went rogue. Each Mini has three lives. Once they've been hit three times, they're out of the game. The team they've just scared the shit out of don't have lives, but instead, a points system. They get points by shooting the sensors on the Minis, but lose them, if they get shot. If they get enough points by the end of the time limit, they win, but they better be careful! If too many of her underlings are killed, there'll be consequecnes! That's all she tells them. The Minis immediately resume the attack, having backed off a bit so she could explain the game.

As soon as she finishes talking, the others are fucking pumped up for this. Monty and Chica are on the hunt to get as many Minis out as possible. They wanna see what the 'consequences' are if they beat too many of them! Freddy is pretty curious as well, but he's trying to play this cleverly. He's sneaking around, trying to work out where the Minis are and using his indepth knowledge of the maze to try and figure out where they're hiding. It was Roxy's idea to have the Minis just. Not go anywhere near him. There's maybe two or three that are tailing him to mess with him the entire time. Unfortunately for Freddy, Roxy is also playing it smart and knows that given this is his attraction and he has the most experience, knowledge and skill here, she needs to give him as few opportunities to score points as possible. Hence, there are three or four Minis sneaking around him, giving him brief glimpses and confusing him as they lure him away from the rest of his team. He'll catch on eventually he's being led in circles, but it takes him longer than he'll care to admit. Sunny is very loudly running around screaming as loud as possible. The Minis are giving him every opportunity and he's having a blast even if he's failing miserably to hit the sometimes completely stationary targets. The Minis are also loving it. He's very funny in his panicked gun flailing whenever one gets the jump on him. When Moon comes out at the halfway point, they somewhat back off since Moon is much more focused on winning than Sunny is. Moon does not appreciate being messed with so hard by a bunch of spiders and he knows Roxy is laughing her ass off at him and he's gonna kill her for this he fucking swears-

He won't of course, he is enjoying it. He's just going to glare at her over inviting and aiding in the Minis fucking with him with a fog machine. And LOUDLY complain to DJ. Just a little. He loves it though he thinks this was such a fun way to do it, he just doesn't like being on the receiving end of the spooks. If Foxy is here, he's talking to himself and loudly threatening every source of noise he's ever heard. He hears footsteps behind him and he spins around, shooting blindly like "OH YE THINK YER FUNNY DO YA?! OH I'LL SHOW YA FUNNY YA MANGEY MENACES!!" He's talking big but he's maybe hit them like. Four times in the span of a one hour game. They're giving him opportunities of course! He's just a yap first, shoot later kinda guy and its costing him points lmao

Bonnie of course, wasn't that freaked out by them, but this is his downfall. Roxy knows him too well. He was in on all of this, so he seems to think that he'll be able to have some sway in how the Minis operate. He tries bargaining with them not to shoot him, trying to convince them that "heeeeeyyy I'm on your side man!! I can tell you where the others are!" but they know the play. If he can convince them to go easy on him because this was his idea and he and Roxy worked together to make this happen, he can sneak potshots when their backs are turned for free points and not get shot in the process. Oh yes, Roxy had him figured out from the get go lmao. He's a serial cheat, she knew he'd try that the second he got a chance, so the Minis have been advised to go all out on him. He's the weakest link in the chain, and he's gonna be what wins them the game. She was right as well! At the end, they looked at the stats and Bonnie literally gained the least amount of points, but lost more than the rest of the team combined lmao he'll be sulking about her 'betrayal' for a long time. She ruined his game plan!! How could she!!

He did kind of expect her to figure it out but he was really relying on her just. Not. He didn't really think about the plan B if she did figure it out and pass it onto the Minis lmao that's on him. He knew and he was still banking on it like a FOOL

But yeah, the Minis are treating Chica and Monty as a team since they're together the most throughout the game. One the Minis heard them saying they were gonna try and find out what the consequences for beating enough Minis were and passed that onto Roxy, who passed it onto the rest of the team of Minis. Since she's played Fazerblast with everyone else maybe like. Three times ever due to many reasons, she doesn't really know how everyone is inside of the arena, but she did need to know who would be gunning for kills rather than points. So, Bonnie suggested that if any Minis heard anyone talking about it, or figured out who was aiming for that, they should relay it back to her. She was initially against this, since she's struggling to keep the game fair already, but the Minis assured her that if they know who is trying to get them out of the game, more of them can get out, and Roxy can enact the 'consequences' part of the game. She agrees, but under the condition that if they ever get to do this again, if that rigs things too much, they don't ever do it again.

So Chica and Monty are actually making headway. They really didn't need to pass the message onto Roxy what they were trying to do so they could give them the best game they can. They're having a blast running from the Minis when they've been hit, running into battle screaming whilst firing at random and are loving this hide and seek style swarm game. They're the reason they're gonna win this. If Freddy figures out the tricks being played on him, he'll contribute a lot as well, but he also needs to find the other groups of Minis which is easier said than done given they've all decided to go spooky hard mode on him lmao they gotta give him a challenge, right? And boy are they challenging him.

But anyway, Freddy figures out the deception and has started making headway on points, while Chica and Monty are leading the charge. Sunny is getting a good few points, while Bonnie has teamed up with Foxy and Bonnie is getting peppered almost constantly while Foxy comes up with more and more creative, laser themed threats. At the halfway point, Moon joins Monty and Chica's team and when there's only fifteen minutes left, Freddy meets up with Bonnie and Foxy. With a significant amount of Minis out of the game, Roxy's voice comes back over the intercom, once again in character. How dare they kill so many of her team!! They had families ya know!! Ohhh they've really done it now!! It's about time they got what's really coming for 'em!!

Now, Freddy and Foxy immediately ask Bonnie what that means. He says, either she's sending a second wave of Minis to overwhelm them, but he's not sure if enough of them joined the game for that, or she's gonna double the amount of points the Minis take when they land a hit or some other stat altering thing like increasing the Minis' lives. He's guessing it's gonna be the lives and points thing. Freddy and Foxy are immediately like "oh okay so we just have to stop you from getting shot every five seconds. Okay. That's doable." He's offended, but also yeah that's fair.

Roxy does neither of those things. Instead, she does a secret, third thing. Poppet and Glowstick had been insistent on this and the other Minis had all agreed it would be really fun, even if they never got to do it like this again. She'd agreed, but had made some tweaks to make it more interesting and so the team wasn't just immediately slaughtered.

In the maze, the amount of Minis seems to have dwindled. There's a few, but they don't seem to be pushing the offensive anymore. They seem to have gone back to being spooky instead, maybe even luring them around, but they won't fall for it again. Well, Chica, Monty and Moon might, but that's not the intention here. They suddenly hear something a bit different in the mist. Maybe a lot of Minis at once?? They're not sure. They can defnitely hear cymbals crashing though. They follow it of course. They only have so much time left and they haven't got enough points to win yet! What's going on? What's Roxy gonna throw at them this time?

It's herself. A blindfolded Roxy is lose in the Fazerblast maze, with the Minis music boxes, cymbals, and footstamping as her guides. Poppet and Bobbin are in her hair and on her shoulder giving her more precise guidance, and are acting as her little turrets. Roxy has some sensors on her worth double the points, but given she's running full speed in full dog mode on her fours around the maze, chasing them down and then disappearing into the fog by direction of the Minis, she's really fucking hard to hit lmao. She's literally just one big curveball that's running around, covering the Minis and the distracting the others by simple existing in the maze, and she's made it so much harder but god damn are they loving this. Bonnie fucking screamed when she leapt out of the fog towards him he was not expecting that sfdsfdsfs

But yeah, thanks to Roxy being blindfolded and unable to really change her strategy based on who and what she can see, the Minis are now the strategists. They're the ones in charge of Roxy and are now coordinating on what she's doing, rather than the other way around. This makes them a bit more open to getting shot since they've got to focus on multiple things at once, but Roxy approaching at alarming speeds it's more than enough to keep that level lmao and with the amount of sensors on her with the double points, the others were still easily able to get enough points to win. Roxy had a blast running around listening to their joyful terror, and she and the Minis play games like this all the time, so she was able to completely stun the others with how easily she and the Minis worked together like this. Like, they're amazed she was running around the maze that fast when all of them have witnessed her crashing face first into a glass wall more than once. The added panicking and noises from the others made it harder to follow the Minis' instructions too so it was a challenge for her as well, and really, that's what she was aiming for in terms of making the game fun with Bonnie. Something new and challenging for them all.

It was fun, and Roxy congratulated them on defeating the swarm and her. Bonnie rattles her for scaring the shit out of him like that and they all get one hell of a laugh out of everyone recounting what had happened. There's some feedback tossed around on how to make the game better, and they brainstorm some changes and what not. Roxy admits it was pretty heavily stacked against them, but Bonnie had insisted on making sure it felt like they were the underdogs fighting the unrelenting Spider Horde. She just worked on making sure it was actually winnable with the points and lives system.

Freddy, explains this obviously can't get pushed out to the public (which she and Bonnie already knew because obviously an army of Mini Music Men that are varying levels of beat up and broken that the public doesn't know about isn't going to fly) but that he wouldn't be against them hosting more games like this. It was fun and though he drags his feet on it, he admits that Roxy and the Minis were able to give him a challenging game. They're smug about it for weeks.

And there you go! That's what happened when Roxy and Bonnie teamed up to unleash the Minis on the Fazerblast arena on their unsuspecting friends! They all had a great time and will absolutely be playing it again many times in the future!

#fnaf security breach #roxanne wolf #glamrock bonnie #lil music man #lil music men #mini music men #glamrock freddy #glamrock chica #montgomery gator #glamrock foxy #fnaf sunny #fnaf moon #the daycare attendant #this was fun ngl #that'd be a hell of a stacked game honestly #I dunno how fair it would be necessarily but it SOUNDS fun to me #and the minis deliberately messing with freddy? because they're on roxy's side of their problems??? #never!!! #it was all part of the strategy!! that was totally the ONLY reason they had for doing it like that #lmao they had fun #I like to think Bonnie getting shot so much cause he kept trying to cheat led to him screaming 'IM BEING BULLIED' as loud as possible #so dramatic over being forced to play the game lmao #anyway that's it #byyyeee #pop rox answers

[illiterateaffairs]

DISTRACTIONS VI | NIGHTCALL

pairing: jamie tartt x f!reader (ted lasso)

rating: T

word count: 5,071

summary: you don’t know what to do about your feelings for jamie anymore. luckily you know a few people with thoughts on the matter. 

A/N: posting a little early for the holiday weekend! this chapter and part seven were supposed to be one chapter but it got too long. so i apologize for the cliff hanger in advance. :)

distractions masterlist | previous chapter

How do you simultaneously savor something while avoiding it?

That’s what you’ve been trying to do the last few days. 

After deciding the best thing to do would be to end your relationship with Jamie, you’ve been putting off doing so and have maintained your routine of dodging him at every encounter. You knew ghosting him was cruel and you didn’t want to do that. In fact, you were trying to hold on to every last ounce of him you could get, not knowing how your friendship would evolve once you called off the benefits part. But you only spoke to him for a few minutes, or over very brief text exchanges because you didn’t want to give him the wrong idea. But you wanted to spend time with him while you could. Clearly you’re in quite the predicament 

The whole thing was ridiculous and you would be the first to admit that. If you were a normal person, you’d have either ended things with Jamie already or just gotten a grip and told him how you felt. But you were not normal. You were emotionally manipulated into thinking you weren’t good enough for your last boyfriend, so why would this be any different? 

You know your brain is working against you, but your heart is also aching. And while in this moment avoiding Jamie was hurting it, you wanted to protect it from more hurt down the line if he just ended up rejecting you. 

You’ve been trying to figure out the best way to break things off, and when you got overwhelmed by the thought, you dissociated by working on your book. Calling it a book was generous, but that’s what you hoped it would be eventually. A fake-it-until-you-make-it mentality. That’s also what you told yourself to do regarding Jamie. If you acted like you were going to get over him and everything would be okay, eventually that would be true. 

Of course, it was hard to convince yourself of this when he was so ingrained in your life. Even without seeing him after hours, you saw him around the club. You managed to limit your time with him over the last week, and Rebecca was surely becoming suspicious, but you expertly avoided her concerned gaze as well. Unfortunately, today you weren’t so lucky. Seemingly as a punishment for leaving her in the dark, Rebecca tasked you with getting some footage of the team while they trained. When you looked like you were about to protest, she hit you with, “or is there something you want to tell me, that would prohibit you from doing so?” And for a moment you considered breaking down and telling her everything. Then you remembered she would definitely give you reasonable advice, such as getting your head out of your ass, and you weren’t ready to hear it. So you faked a smile and headed for the pitch. 

Today, the boys were doing some sort of drill that involved them switching positions with another teammate. You didn’t really understand the ideology, but apparently it had to do with this new “Total Football” strategy Ted wanted them to try. Having not been around in a while, you were also confused why there were fans in the stands watching practice. You suspected this was Ted’s doing as well. There was a group of three fans you recognize as regulars at Crown and Anchor who called out to you with a wave. You kindly waved back before turning to Trent who stood beside you.

“How the fuck do they know who I am?”

The journalist only snorted, and went back to writing in his notebook. 

For all your effort to avoid Jamie, including eye contact while he practiced, you couldn’t help but gaze at him as he spoke with Ted and Beard. He looked particularly good today, for some godforsaken reason. The wind was blowing his hair around, making him look extra appealing. As he walked away from the coaches, with a confused smile, his eyes found yours, and his smile brightened a bit. That was your last straw. You gave him a quick smile, that you hoped he couldn’t tell was forced, and turned away as he jogged back onto the field. 

As the team started playing in their new roles, you walked further down the pitch to film from different vantage points. You were so focused on what you were doing, while also being amused by the team’s role-swap, you didn’t notice Roy slowly moving closer to you every few minutes. As you posted a clip to the team’s Instagram, you saw him out of the corner of your eye. He was facing the field, with his arms crossed, but you could tell he was chancing glances at you from the corner of his eye. You bite back a smile as you pocket your phone. 

“Can I help you?”

Roy doesn’t move. He shrugs, “Just observing training.” 

“Hmm,” you nod, crossing your own arms to mimic his posture. 

He side-steps a bit closer to you. You follow suit, and the two of you are only a foot apart now. You watch curiously as Roy’s expression turns into one of annoyance and you can’t wait to hear what he’s going to say.

“So...you and Jamie have been spending a lot of time together.”

That was not what you were expecting him to say. Jamie had told you a few things about their time in Amsterdam together, but he did not mention telling Roy about the two of you. They must have really bonded. 

“He told you that?” you don’t mean to come across so nervous but you definitely do. Luckily, the rest of the team, coaching staff, and Trent are out of earshot. 

“Yeah. Thought that was...interesting.” Roy grunts out. In other circumstances, you’d be more amused about how awkward he was in this conversation, but you were too concerned about why you were having it. 

“Well,” you debate your next words but ultimately spit them out, “Jamie told me he taught you how to ride a bike, which is also interesting.”

Roy’s eyes fall closed as he quietly groans. 

You continue, “So, I guess we both know a secret about each other.”

Roy finally turns to you with narrowed eyes, “I didn’t come over here because I wanted to tell everyone. That's your fucking business.” 

While you’re relieved that your secret is safe, you were still confused, “Then why did you?”

Roy studies you for a few seconds before letting out a long breath, “You mean a lot to Jamie.”

Your eyebrows shoot up in surprise as your heartbeat rises. 

Roy keeps going, “He’d never say it himself, but you’re important to him. And what you’re doing, avoiding him or whatever, is really fucking with him. As much as it pains me to say, he’s a good guy and he doesn’t deserve being jerked around like that. He’s gotten enough of that from other people in his life. You don’t have to pretend to be in love with him or anything, but just…don’t give up on him completely. That’s all I’m saying.”

After digesting his words, you nod slowly. You’re not sure if Jamie said something to him about this, or if he was just looking out for his friend, but you know he means what he says. No matter the nature of Jamie’s feelings for you, you were clearly such a fixture in his life, that even Roy Kent could see it. And from the little Jamie’s told you about his father, you could tell he had something akin to abandonment issues. While you didn’t plan on cutting him out of your life completely, you knew your method of pulling away from him suddenly and withholding information while you got your shit together was not fair to him. 

“Thank you for saying that, Roy,” you finally say softly, knowing this was out of character for him, making it a big deal, “I would never, ever intentionally hurt Jamie. But I appreciate that you’re looking out for him.”

Roy nods back. You two let the moment hang before Roy quickly spits out, “You can’t tell him I said any of that to you.”

You laugh lightly, “I promise.”

You share a look of understanding as Roy turns to head back down the pitch. He makes it only a couple steps before turning back around. He opens his mouth but you beat him to it.

“I promise not to tell anyone about the bike thing either.” 

Roy sighs, giving you another appreciative look. This time, you’re the one who stops him as he turns back. 

“Roy?” he pauses and looks at you with a question in his eye, “You’re a really good friend to Jamie. He’d never admit it either, but you’re probably one of his best.”

While Roy is pretty good at maintaining a poker face, you can tell this affects him. You can also tell he’s not sure what to do with the information, so you give him a smile before jutting your chin in the direction he was headed. 

“You’re dismissed.”

Roy huffs out a small laugh, giving you one last nod, before finally making his way back down the pitch. 

As you stare back at the field, pretending to focus on the team’s training again, you take in Roy’s words. As you told him, you never planned on hurting Jamie, but that was mostly because you didn’t think that would be an issue. 

Jamie was not a relationship and feelings guy. He made that very clear, not only with his reputation, but also in his promise to you when you started sleeping together. You knew he cared about you. You don’t look out for someone the way he does with you if you don’t give a shit about them. But after talking to Roy, you found yourself wondering if maybe his care for you went beyond the realm of friendship.

No. No. You couldn’t get your hopes up. You still needed to end your sexual relationship with Jamie. You just needed to do it in a way that made it clear that you weren’t going anywhere.

Then another terrifying idea entered your mind. How the hell were you supposed to be Jamie’s friend without wanting to make out with him all the time? 

Moving to Richmond was supposed to make your life less complicated. 

For the next few days, you mull over your plan to break off things with Jamie between work and bursts of inspiration to write. By the time the team’s next match rolls around, you’ve thought about it so much it felt like you’ve simultaneously run through every scenario you could execute and made zero progress whatsoever. It was like saying a word over and over again until it lost all meaning. So you decided you needed reinforcements. 

Keeley would probably have really great advice, but you didn’t want to broach the ex-boyfriend of it all yet. Rebecca would definitely be helpful, but you didn’t think you could handle an “I told you so” yet about your developing feelings for the footballer. And regardless of either of those things, you came to one realization recently. 

You just really wanted to talk to Sam about it. 

He was your closest friend here - and probably ever - and he also knew Jamie pretty well. And in you’re effort to avoid Jamie, Sam had become collateral damage since that meant avoiding the whole team when possible. You’d also heard from Ted that Sam had been having a hard week with some social media blowback due to his activism around immigration. Which is fucking stupid, but you understood why it upset him. On top of that, his restaurant was vandalized in retaliation for his words, and the same week his father was visiting. So you figured you owed him a shoulder, too. And you just really missed him. 

That’s why you found yourself popping in the locker room ahead of their game against Arsenal. You spot Sam right away from your spot in the doorway. Unfortunately, he was sitting next to Jamie, so when you call his name and gesture for him to come talk to you, it gets the other boy’s attention, too.

As Sam makes his way over to you, you give Jamie a kind smile and a wave. It makes your chest hurt when he seems caught off guard by your act of kindness and gives you a timid smile back. He definitely knows you’re avoiding him and that makes you feel awful. You really need to talk to Sam.

As your aforementioned friend joins you at the front of the locker room, you instantly feel comforted by his warm smile. 

“Hi, it's so good to see you!” he greets. Okay, he’s definitely felt your absence as well. 

“You, too,” you smile back, “I met your dad a few minutes ago.”

“Oh, really?” his smile brightens, if that were possible.

You nod, “Rebecca met him, too.” Sam had told you about their brief stint together a little while ago, after you eventually confided in him about Mason. 

His smile falls slightly, “Oh, really?”

You chuckle, “Don’t worry, it was fine, and when it almost got awkward, Keeley defused the situation.” 

Sam lets out a relieved laugh as he rubs his forehead, “That’s good.”

Glancing around, you see the rest of the team preoccupied, including Jamie and Ted. Still you lower your voice, “So, I know you’ve probably got plans with your dad tonight, but would you be free to talk for a few minutes after the match? I kind of want your advice on something.”

Sam nods, but gives you a questioning look, “Everything okay?”

You nod eagerly back, “Yes, don’t worry. Just something I’ve been trying to figure out for a while and would love my best friend’s perspective.” 

The phrase slips out before you can process it. For a split second you worry you came onto strong. God, you were supposed to worried about like Jamie too much and now you were worried you were taking your friendship with Sam too series, as well? Thankfully, his bright smile returned to his face. “Well I would be honored to help my best friend out.” 

Thank God. You can’t remember the last time someone called you their best friend, and while you had (inadvertently) said it first, it still makes your heart flutter. 

“Great, I’ll see you after? Good luck out there,” You squeeze his arm before turning to the rest of the room and raising your voice, “Good luck today, guys!”

The room fills with a chorus of “thank you’s” and other words of appreciation. Before you head out, your eyes meet Jamie’s again, and you find yourself mouthing “you’ll do great.”

While he still seems surprised by your attention, he gives you a genuine smile this time. 

Richmond is not off to a great start as they round out the first half 0-3. It seemed they were trying out Ted’s new tactics, but they couldn’t get into sync. Jamie was at the center of it all, and from your spot in the suite with Rebecca, Keeley, Higgins, and Sam’s dad, Ola, you can feel the frustration radiating off of him from the field. 

However, the team seems to reenter the pitch with renewed energy for the second half. It takes them a few minutes to get there, but eventually they’re playing in perfect harmony. You’re not sure you understand exactly what they’re doing - not that you ever do - but whatever it was seemed to be working. By the end of the match, they had expertly managed to maneuver the ball across the field, with Jamie passing between other members of the team, for their first goal in weeks. And while you couldn’t explain any of it, you knew it was incredible. You want to ignore the part of you that feels proud of Jamie in particular, but you allow it. 

You wait for Sam in the parking lot with Ola afterwards. The two of you can’t help but cheer for Sam when he approaches. His dad shares how proud he is of him and the team, before he jumps in the car to leave the two of you alone. That wasn’t before the older man implied he suspected the two of you were an item. You and Sam laugh, before he corrects him and once again refers to you as his best friend. Ola smiles and tells you he’s grateful Sam has such good friends here.

“I’m proud of you, too,” you smile, shoving his arm playfully. “You guys are finally back in it!”

Sam chuckles, “I appreciate it, but honestly it was all Jamie.”

You raise an eyebrow, “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Sam nods, “It was his idea to drop back to mid-field and pass between all of us, even though it meant he probably wouldn’t have the chance to score.”

You huff, “That seems out of character.”

Sam shrugs, “Maybe two years ago, but Jamie’s been different, especially lately.” You almost feel yourself take credit when Sam continues, “It's probably all that training he does with Roy.”

You laugh quietly to yourself, “Must be.”

“So, what did you want to talk about?” Sam asks.

“Funny, it actually has to do with Jamie.”

Sam’s eyes reflect curiosity, “Really? What about him?”

“We’ve sort of, you know,” You try to figure out the best way to explain it, but you can’t bother beating around the bush, “Well, we’ve basically been sleeping together the last few months.”

Sam’s jaw drops and his eyebrows shoot up so high they’re almost nonexistent. “You’re serious?”

“Yup,” you nod, popping the ‘P’, “It’s a classic no strings attached, friends with benefits situation.”

“While those are excellent films, I would have never expected you to take part in something like that. Especially with Jamie.”

“Me either - on both accounts - but it just sort of happened.” 

Sam nods slowly, looking off in the distance, as he takes in the news, “I’m a little afraid of what advice you want from me.”

You laugh, “Don’t worry, it's nothing salacious. The opposite, in fact. I’m trying to figure out how to break things off.”

Sam’s eyes snap back to yours, “What? Really? Is…” he lowers his voice, “Is Jamie bad at it?”

You almost choke on air, “What? No! He’s good. He’s really good. Like really, really good.”

“Okay, that’s enough.”

“Sorry.”

“So why do you want to stop?”

You sigh, “Because I like him. I really, really like him. And that wasn’t a part of the deal.”

Sam nods in understanding, “You attached strings.”

“Yes,” you laugh lightly despite yourself. “So many strings.”

“And you don’t want a relationship with him because…what? Your ex sucked and ruined the idea of dating forever?”

You shake your head, “No, it's not that. I think I'd really like to date Jamie. I’m just not sure Jamie wants to date me. Or anyone for that matter.” 

Sam’s face scrunches up. He pauses and then, “I’m not sure you’re right about that.”

You squint at him, “What do you mean?”

Sam lets out a laugh, “Actually, now that I know about you two, things suddenly make a lot of sense.”

“What? What makes sense?” you question impatiently. 

“Jamie definitely likes you.”

You scoff, “And you think that because??”

“It’s little things. Nothing too crazy, but all together, plus the fact that you’ve been hooking up this whole time, it adds up,” Sam begins to explain, “Like when you first got here and we started hanging out, Jamie was very interested in what we were doing.”

“Yeah, he asked me if we were dating around that time,” You bring up softly, recalling your first conversation in the club’s parking lot.

“See!”

“See what? He told me he just didn’t think people on the team could date club employees.”

“Yeah, why do you think he wanted to know that?”

“I don’t know! Maybe he also wanted to bang Rebecca.” Sam gives you a look and you unclench, “Sorry, that was disrespectful to you and Rebecca, and probably Jamie.”

Sam shakes his head, “It wasn’t just that. A couple months ago, one of the guys - who shall remain nameless for the sake of this conversation - made an innocent but suggestive comment about you.”

“It was Richard wasn’t it?”

“He shall remain nameless,” Sam barrels on, “But Jamie flipped out and defended your honor. I thought it was because he’d been trying to be less of a prick, but it was probably jealousy. Or at the very least protectiveness.”

“I buy the protectiveness thing because we’re friends,” you roll your eyes, “but he was definitely not jealous.” 

“Come on, you can’t tell me you haven’t noticed how attached to you he is? He’s always the first person to volunteer when you need social content, and the first to say hi when you stop by during practice.” 

You shake your head, trying to find words to argue, but you’re losing resolve. 

“A couple weeks ago, a few of us were at Crown and Anchor, including Jamie, and this girl started flirting with Jamie, and she was gorgeous, probably one of the most beautiful girls we had ever seen, she was-”

“Sam?”

“Yeah?”

“I get it.”

“Sorry. Anyway, this girl was definitely the type Jamie would normally go for, but he didn’t even bat an eye. Isaac started teasing him but it didn’t bother Jamie. He said he wasn’t interested. Before you got here, he would have gone home with her, no questions asked.”

You break eye contact with Sam. “...Maybe her breath smelled bad?”

Sam rolls his eyes, “Or maybe there was someone better he could see.”

You sigh, crossing your arms. 

“I’m not saying you have to stay with Jamie,” Sam continues, “You are a strong, independent woman who definitely doesn’t need anyone to define her. But if you want to be with Jamie, then you shouldn’t punish yourself. Just because some other idiot didn’t treat you right, doesn’t mean the next guy will do the same thing. I guarantee Jamie will treat you better, because he clearly already does.”

You swallow the lump that's forming in your throat, as tears pool behind your eyes. Looking back at Sam, his face drops, clearly taking your emotional expression as a negative reaction.

“If I overstepped-”

You don’t let Sam apologize as you cut him off with a bear hug. He quickly wraps his arms around yours and squeezes you tight. 

Not only does Sam Obisanya know exactly what to say to you, he also gives the best hugs. 

“Are you alright?” he whispers over your shoulder.

You nod into his, “Yeah. I think I really needed to hear someone else say that.”

“Good. Because your ex was an idiot. Like the stupidest person I’ve ever heard of.” You laugh as you pull away, “You know that right? That whatever he did to make you feel less than the incredible person you are was on him. You’re amazing and it was his fault for not seeing that.”

You smile, wiping a stray tear away. “Yeah, I do. My brain likes to work against me sometimes, but I know that.”

“I understand that,” Sam gives you a reassuring smile, “Brains are dumb sometimes.”

“God, they’re so dumb!” You laugh as you catch your breath. “Thank you, Sam.”

“Of course. I’m here for you anytime, you know that.” You nod. Sam bites his lip before speaking up again, “So, does this mean you’re going to profess your undying love for Jamie?”

“Shut up,” you shove him gently, “I wouldn’t go that far, but yeah, maybe I’ll tell him.” 

“Good. And I better be the first to know when he tells you he feels the same so I can gloat about being right.”

You laugh before another thought occurs to you.

“Wait, if you picked up on all of this from Jamie, do you think anyone else has?”

Sam shakes his head as if you’ve said something insane, “No way. No else on the team is that intuitive.”

You huff, but press, “Not even the coaches?”

“I don’t think so,” Sam tilts his head, “Why?”

“That is a story for another day, my friend.” 

Before saying goodbye to Sam for the night, you ask how he’s handling everything after the Twitter backlash and the break-in. While he assures you he’s doing okay, you can tell he’s putting on a strong front. You’re relieved his dad could be here this week. You’re sure it's been a great comfort to Sam. As you start heading towards the car Rebecca arranged for you, you also bid adieu to Ola, who made you promise to get dinner with him and Sam before he returned to Nigeria. 

Gazing out the window on your way back to Richmond, you reassess your plan to call things off with Jamie. After hearing how he took one for the team today, coupled with everything Sam said about him in regards to you, you feel yourself becoming hopeful that it did mean Jamie may have feelings for you. At the very least, you could put yourself out there. Because Sam was right, you couldn’t let Mason cloud your brain anymore. The way he treated you was unacceptable, and just because he made you feel like you weren’t good enough doesn’t mean you were. And sure Jamie never made you feel like that. But as of late, you’ve been feeling more confident on your own. You were good at your job. You had amazing friends who liked you for you. And you had your creative spark back and started writing again. So even if Jamie didn’t feel the same, you knew you’d be okay. Because you were more than your relationship with him.

It would just be the cherry on top of everything else. A really fucking good cherry.

Eager to see him, you quickly take out your phone and find his contact. Pressing call, you suddenly hate the sound of the dial tone. Thankfully you don’t have to listen to it for long, when Jamie picks up after the second ring. He says your name like a question, reminding you that you haven’t reached out to him on your own in quite a bit. Brushing past the guilt you felt, you greet him.

“Hi,” you say softly, “How are you?”

“Um, I’m alright. Yeah. How’re you?”

You close your eyes, still hearing the unsureness in his tone and you curse yourself for making him feel insecure. 

“I’m good,” you force out cheerfully, “You were incredible today. At the match.”

“Oh?” Jamie says, a bit surprised, “It was nothing. Richard scored the goal.”

You sigh at his modesty, “Yeah, but you were the one doing all that work getting the ball across the field. If you ask me, you were the star of the show.”

“Oh yeah?” you can feel the confidence creeping back into his voice, “Thank you.”

“Of course,” your words hang in between you for a moment, but you speak up again before you lose the nerve, “So, I called because I wanted to know what you were up to tonight. Thought maybe you could come over?”

“Really?” you can almost see Jamie’s wide eyes.

“Yeah. We haven’t really seen each other in a while, and I promise there’s a reason for that, which I can explain. And I just…miss you.”

You close your eyes, anticipating his response. You bite your thumb as Jamie sharply inhales. 

“I miss you, too,” he says softly.

“Really?” you respond just as quietly. 

“Yeah.” He pauses for a second. Then, “Shit.”

“What?” you say back quickly, heart racing. 

“It's just…Isaac and I thought it would be nice if we did something to help Sam with his restaurant since someone vandalized it. So, now a bunch of the team is headed over there to help fix it up. I was actually just about to leave.”

You exhale quietly. You didn’t think you could like him more than you already do, but you were wrong. 

“Jamie, that's really great. It's sweet that you all would do that for Sam.”

“You could come join us?” Jamie suggests hopefully, though you can feel the nerves in his voice. 

You laugh lightly, “While I would love to help, I think you guys should just keep it to the team. It’ll be more special that way.”

“Yeah,” Jamie sighs, disappointedly. 

“But you could come over after if you want?” You suggest quickly, with a lilt in your voice. 

“Yeah?” Jamie perks up, “Are you sure? It might be late.”

You nod even though he can’t see you, “I’ll wait for you.” 

“Okay,” you hear the smile in his words, “I’ll text you when I’m on my way, yeah?”

“Sounds good. Bye Jamie.” and with a giddy smile, you hang up. 

You’re too anxious to go home right away, especially knowing you’ll be waiting for a bit. So, you text Rebecca to see if she’d meet you for a drink. Keeley had a date with Jack tonight, who she’d been seeing for a bit now. But that just gives you a chance to fill Rebecca in on your rollercoaster of emotions. 

Of course, she says :I told you so: when you admit to falling for Jamie. But she’s also happy for you. She’s glad to see you so happy in general, and that you didn’t close yourself off to the possibility of happiness with someone. Apparently, that was something she used to do. 

You also “ooh” and “ahh” when Rebecca recounts her misadventures in Amsterdam with a mystery Dutch man. You hope the successful encounter also encourages her to put herself back out there. And hopefully she’ll learn the next guy’s name. 

After a couple hours of girl talk, Rebecca drops you off at your flat. Checking your phone, you still hadn’t heard from Jamie, so you pump yourself up to change into your pajamas and throw some comfort TV on while you camp out and wait for him. 

But as you make your way up your apartment staircase, you see a figure lingering outside your door. For half a second, you’re excited at the prospect of seeing Jamie sooner than expected. But as you near the top of the stairs, your eyes recognize the figure as someone you definitely didn’t plan on seeing tonight. 

Softly, you gasp, “Mason?”

A/N:

Taglist: @atabigail @boundtomyfate @sammysgirl1997 @lil-tracys @shephard17895 @alaspice @itsbarbraann @redpool @drmeghanjones @straightforwardly @alex-sulli @aiyaiy @artemismaximoff @roadtoself-love @theloud-yet-quietone @forcesofgrief @kirisimpster @geek-and-proud @grippleback-galaxy @lalla-04p @gabbycoady13 @royalestrellas @qardasngan @creationcitystreet-em @percysaidnever @emily-b @mrfitzsimmons @k-n-e @agentstarkid @legobatmans9thab @mrsprongs25 @escapismqueen @sokkigarden @for-fuck-sake-im-alive @dollfaceyourfear @dicgohargreeves @heyitz-julia @vampirodelascajas @grxcesmind @lizziel1410 @bcon24 @looooooooomis @queen-of-dumbasses @moseyluvs @alipap3 @amachira @respondingtoshowerthoughts-blog @daphneblakeswife​@piper @spookysins @a-sweet-little-fangirl @optimisticsandwichgladiator @marveltg365 @ringpopdust @gcidrvsh @beardsplitter @scaramou  @ibong-adarnaaa @piper570 it wouldn’t let me tag the last few of you, let me know if its something with your settings, otherwise i can keep trying in future updates! <3  

#jamie tartt x reader #jamie tartt imagine #jamie tartt fanfiction #jamie tartt x f!reader #jamie tartt x female reader #ted lasso fanfiction #ted lasso fanfic #mine #distractions series

[cursedvida]

SAD EYES, BROKEN SMILE IV (Buggy x F!Reader)

PART III HERE // PART V HERE

WARNINGS: NSFW minors DNI, little smut, Buggy being nasty, swearing.

A/N: Part 4 of this and finally some smut. hope you enjoy!

You still can't believe you kissed Buggy. It was not in your plans to be so direct. You have never been so emotionally exposed, but is also true that you have no experience in romantic matters. You haven't been attracted to anyone before, or at least not in that way. Buggy brings out your most primitive instincts and clouds your reason, it's something you can't avoid.

But actions have consequences and so does kissing your captain. Buggy still hasn't recovered from the shock. The last thing he expected from you was a confession followed by a kiss. Ever since you joined his crew he noticed how you didn't quite fit in. You didn't seem very excited about show business, nor did you seem to be up for the shows. He didn't quite understand why you were so eager to be part of his crew, but it didn't seem strange to him either: he is Buggy the Clown, he is famous not only in the East Blue but also in the Gran Line. Pirates fear him, Marines hate him. He is a genius of deception and persuasion, his fame precedes him enough to attract new challengers. You might not quite fit in but it made sense that you didn't want to leave.

He still wasn't sure whether to trust you or not. Your confession had left him totally baffled and that kiss directly disarmed him. He would never have imagined such a reaction from you, do you really like him the way you say you do or is it just a strategy? Buggy is a really suspicious person, especially when good things happen to him. He doesn't want to believe that you like him because he knows that, if he does, he'll probably end up being disappointed. There's no way a girl like you, who could have anyone, really has feelings for him. Although she'll never admit it, of course, because he's a renowned pirate and people should consider it an honor to have him around.

Nevertheless, he is unable to take his eyes off you. He watches you as you clean the deck of the ship, he follows your movements at mealtimes with his eyes. He is able to count how many times a day you yawn or make that bored face that characterizes you so much. The more he looks at you, the prettier you look to him and the harder it is for him to control himself.

You notice his gaze fixed on you, although you don't know why he watches you with such intensity. Sometimes you have the feeling that at any moment he will leave you stranded on the first island you see, that your days in that crew are numbered. You think he might be very angry, Buggy's character is fickle and unpredictable at times, if he has taken the kiss badly he won't hesitate to make you pay for it. He shouldn't see it as an offense either, you may not be the most exceptional woman in the world but he might see it as a compliment just the same.

You try to avoid it or pretend nothing happened. Yes, the best thing will be to pretend, as you have been doing so far. But he keeps looking at you, all the time, and you start to get nervous.

"Y/N, I have to talk to you" you hear him call after lunchtime.

You tense up at that moment, you feel all your muscles stiffen, as if you were preparing for a fight. You have a strange feeling in your stomach, as if you were nauseous. The walk to his cabin is the longest you've ever walked, and it's only a few meters. When you finally find yourselves alone, you realize that you are unable to look at him. You, who are used to always looking the enemy in the eye, suddenly shy away from Buggy almost instinctively. You realize that deep down you are dead embarrassed.

"Did you call me, Captain?" you ask rather sheepishly. This whole thing is starting to get on your nerves. You're not like that, you're not a softie, not a shy, insecure little girl, you're a ruthless killer with several dozen deaths behind you. You don't understand why he makes you feel so weak, but when he's near you your head stops obeying you.

"Why did you do that?"

No beating around the bush, straight to the point. Buggy didn't want to waste any time. When you finally manage to look at him, his eyes look distrustful and at the same time somewhat hurt.

"It was a strategy, wasn't it?" he insists "You think I didn't notice?"

"A strategy?"

"Yes, to see if I forgot about what happened a couple of days ago. You were trying to divert attention."

You raise your eyebrows in disbelief. Come on, don't fuck around, did the asshole really think you kissed him on the mouth as a confusion strategy? But is he really an asshole or did he fall out of the cradle at birth?

"But are you stupid or what's wrong with you?"

That response on your part, so aggressive, so angry, makes Buggy totally bewildered. In his mind, the only plausible explanation for a girl like you confessing and kissing him is that you are, in effect, trying to gain his trust so that he will forget the suspicious things about you. He doesn't understand why you seem so infuriated.

"I find it amazing that you brag so much about how wonderful you are when then you're not even capable of believing that a girl can like you" You blurt out to him, crossing your arms.

"I've liked hundreds of women, I'm Buggy the…"

"Yeah, I know, we all know that" you cut him off coldly "You pretend you're so full of yourself, but deep down you have very little confidence in yourself."

"Be careful what you say, sweetie, the consequences can be very bad."

"Is it that hard for you to accept that I like you?"

That question catches Buggy totally off guard. It pains him to admit it, but it really does. Of course he's aware that many women are attracted to him, but they're always passing flings, people he's barely seen for a couple of days. People who, in the end, don't know him. You've spent months with him, you've seen him fail on several occasions, it's clear that you're talented and may one day become a really strong pirate. Besides, you're gorgeous and you're hot, he really does find it hard to believe that this whole thing isn't a hoax.

"If you're not attracted to me that's fine" you tell him "we're both adults, I can handle rejection. But stop underestimating my feelings, that's cruel."

Buggy is silent for a few moments, something quite unbecoming of him. Then he looks at you, still in disbelief.

"So you were serious about yesterday?"

"Of course it was serious!" you exclaim, exasperated "I've been doing a lot of-"

But Buggy's mouth won't let you finish. When you want to realize, his lips are on yours and his tongue, agile and curious, tries to enter your mouth with desperation. It's the first time someone kisses you in such a passionate way, as if somehow trying to eat you whole, so it's a little hard for you to react to his momentum. You move your lips to match his and your tongues begin a contest of strength. Buggy's kiss is deep, tastes like salt and face paint. It has a metallic aftertaste that hooks you and its smell of gunpowder and sea manages to numb your senses. Just when you think you're about to lose your balance, a hand detached from his body grabs you around the waist, pulling you closer to him, so close that you are only a few millimeters apart.

You'd been fantasizing about something like this for a while, but your wettest dreams were nowhere near as exciting as the real thing. Having Buggy kissing you as if the world was going to end at that very moment makes your stomach shrink and your legs shake as if they were made of jelly. You've never felt so vulnerable around anyone before, but you don't hate the feeling, it makes you feel good for the first time.

You wrap your arms around his neck. You want more of him, you want to hold him closer. You need to cling to him with such desperation that the slightest almost imperceptible draft that can fit between the two of you hurts. He senses that need of yours and automatically pulls you tighter against his torso. His kisses are deep, wet and with a slight hint of anger that makes them intoxicating.

"Fuck" he exclaims, pulling away slightly for air.

You let out a small moan, something that makes Buggy smile.

"What's up, little girl, do you want more?"

Now it is you who kiss him. Buggy responds with momentum, placing his leg between yours. His hands begin to explore your body over your clothes. You've never let anyone go this far, but with him you just want more and more. When you notice one of his hands stop at your crotch you freeze.

"I'm actually really looking forward to you" he comments, whispering huskily in your ear as he begins to rub between his hand and the fabric of your pants "I've been wondering for some time what it must be like to have you in my bed"

"What a liar you are" You manage to say, almost in a whisper. You notice how the fabric of your underwear is getting wetter and wetter "When I came you didn't even know my name".

"You're right" he nods, giving you a couple of kisses on your neck while his fingers press your most sensitive parts "I just knew you were a pretty face. Little girl, you're like a chocolate candy."

He then attacks your neck, making you moan. He slowly pulls down your pants, now the only barrier he has are your panties.

"Fuck, little girl, your panties are so wet" his voice sounds husky and very excited "I've barely touched you and you're already like this? Fuck, what a delight."

"Buggy…" You sigh. It's the first time a man has managed to get his hand on you and the feelings you are now experiencing are totally new. The pleasure, the swelling, the wetness… You feel like you're going to explode, that you need more contact, more intensity. You move me a little to make friction between his hand and your most intimate part "Buggy, I love it."

"I'm going to eat you whole, princess."

Buggy then removes his glove with his mouth and it is at that moment that he slips his long fingers under your panties. You open your eyes as you feel the direct contact between his skin and your most intimate area.

"So wet just for me, this is a treasure" he murmurs, quite pleased.

At first he just slides one of his fingers all over your intimate area, making your skin crawl with goose bumps. You swore you wouldn't let anyone have you at their mercy, but you've totally surrendered to him and when he finally locates your clitoris, gently caressing it with your own natural lubrication, you can't help but let out a moan.

"That's it, little girl. Yeah, moan for me" He smiles, quite pleased.

"It's… God, please Buggy don't stop doing it" you ask him, almost beg, because the pleasure is enormous.

Buggy starts stroking you faster, now you feel like your whole body is on fire, with a kind of heat right in the center of your belly that intensifies every time his fingertips brush against your skin. You start moaning helplessly as he slides his tongue down your neck until it reaches your cleavage.

"Buggy…" You can barely say anything, just moan his name, but that seems to delight you.

"I'm going to make you mine completely, Y/N. I hope you know what you've done."

But just as Buggy is about to slip one of his fingers inside you, someone knocks loudly on his cabin door, completely breaking the mood. You both tense up, giving a little gasp. Buggy lets out a huge growl, looking really pissed off.

"But who the fuck is it now!" he shrieks, hands still shoved between your legs.

"Captain" Cabaji's voice is heard "We have a problem, there's a Navy ship nearby".

"Fuck" Buggy roars, he'd probably love to beat the shit out of Cabaji for interrupting him at a time like this, but the reasons have been more than justified.

He looks at you with an annoyed look on his face.

"We're not done yet" It's not an apology, it's a warning.

You smile at him.

"I hope so, Captain."

#buggy #buggy the clown #buggy x y/n #buggy x reader #buggy x you #buggy imagine #buggy headcanons #buggy the clown imagine #op buggy #buggy live action #one piece buggy #buggy one piece #buggy pirates #buggy smut #buggy x oc #captain buggy #buggy d clown #buggy the flashy fool

[too-antigonish]

Morse and drinking in the 70s...

Long....because I can't write short. And obviously, a lot of you will already know this stuff...

Just want to take a moment to talk about alcohol and alcoholism in the context of the early 1970s and remind folks of how totally and completely different it is from how we see it today.

Drunk driving had not been outlawed in most countries. Not only that, it was widely regarding as funny—funny enough to be used as a regular “gag” in movies. Problem drinking was also seen as funny. There were regular cartoon strips about it. The “drunk” was a funny stock character in all sorts of plays and movies.

Alcohol was ubiquitous. We’re not just talking liquid lunches. We’re talking drinking at work, while you work—just as you see in Endeavour. Think about that for a second.

And politely saying no wasn’t something you did without social consequences. It wasn’t just seen as a personal preference. Unless you had a specific, acceptable reason, turning down a drink was often seen as stand-offish and judgmental or as a social snub. Teetotalism was regarded as rather naive and ridiculous—not something any man or woman of the world would embrace.

In the early 1970s, there was no widespread understanding of alcoholism as a disease. It was still seen very much as the consequence of personal weakness—still a matter of “If you cared enough or tried hard enough, you wouldn’t do this so it must be a character flaw.”

Plus, most people, “normal” people don’t have problems with alcohol, so if you do then there’s something abnormal and defective about you—most likely something you brought upon yourself.

And as a “personal weakness” and a “defect,” the shame around it was profound and the secrecy matched. If someone went away for treatment, it was very much akin to an unwed mother going off to have her baby and then returning without the child. You never spoke of it. You pretended that it had never happened.

If you were a kind person, you also didn’t go out of your way to parade babies in front of her or talk constantly about children when she was with you. But refer to it directly? Never. Ask for help? Never. It was always something to be hidden. Everyone did their best to forget that it had ever happened and saw this as the "kindest" thing to do.

When Morse returns from his “cure,” it would simply be assumed that everyone would pretend that nothing unusual has happened. Why he’s  just been off on a tour of the West Country and nothing else! Hope you had a lovely time! That sort of polite fiction was exactly what he would have expected upon his return. Anything more direct—at least in a public setting—would have been shocking to him and everyone else.

Where things break down, however, is in the more personal interactions. His relationship with Thursday is such that they can at least broach the topic of drinking. When they do, my impression is that Thursday is well-aware that Morse not “cured.” However, in the context of the time, saying this would be akin to saying, "You failed," because there was no disease model of alcholism in widespread use. You went to be cured and it worked or it didn't.

However, I'd also add that Thursday is almost to the breaking point with the cumulative strain he is under. He can’t cope with the “burden” of Morse being in a precarious state and he knows it. He feels desperately guilty about that—as well as about other things like Strange and Joan or about life having moved on so much while Morse was gone—and so he just shuts down. 

Shutting down is Thursday’s go-to strategy when he’s overwhelmed. We’ve seen him do it many times before. And part of that for him, is that he pretends that the people around him are ok—even if they are anything but ok. Not surprisingly, he does it the most with the people he has the closest emotional ties with—Win, Joan, Sam, and Morse.

So the only way that Thursday can cope is by having Morse be perfectly fine. Conveniently, his preferred coping strategy fits exactly with his society's expectations about how alcoholism works. If Morse is "cured," you don’t need to worry about sparing him the constant offers of alcohol in the same way that the young unwed mother might hope to be spared babies. You certainly wouldn’t embarrass him (especially after he’s been through the humiliation of rehab) by drawing attention in any way to a possible to the idea that he still has a problem. 

And finally, a last note on time context. The scene in the pub where Morse has that first drink after finding out that Joan is marrying Jim is utterly heartbreaking for so many reasons. One of those reasons, however, is that we know it’s the first drink—and that the first drink leads to the second, and so on and so forth. Then Morse says to Thursday, “They said the, the odd beer, the odd shot, does no harm…"Everything in moderation," they said,”  and we automatically assume he’s lying.

I’m fairly sure that those scenes were meant to be interpreted through our modern viewpoint. However, it’s worth noting that again, the model of alcoholism in the 1970s was nothing like what we have today. The idea that someone with a drinking problem/addictions needs to abstain entirely was not even close to universal at that point. It’s perfectly possible that the advice Morse is quoting is the advice he received!

#itv endeavour #endeavour morse #shaun evans #fred thursday #endeavour: prelude #thursday thursday #sort of #but mostly meta about alcohol in endeavour and the 70s

[this-is-what-makes-us-fandoms]

Alliance || Total Drama ||

After finding out Duncan cheated on you with Gwen, Alejandro offers you an alliance as revenge against Duncan. 

Pairing: Duncan x Reader x Alejandro 

Warnings: Cheating (not reader), fem implied reader 

Words: As I’m finally coming out of my writer’s block, I present this! Maybe a little self-indulgent because I like Alejandro and Duncan. Oops—Might make a second part if people like it though.

| Not my GIFs |

Your cheering for Cody ceased when Tyler blurted out the secret he’s been holding back. It took a moment to register in your head, not wanting to believe it. Duncan didn’t actually kiss Gwen, right? Your boyfriend and best friend wouldn’t have done that to you. It had to have been a strategy the other team came up with to throw you off. Pitting you against each other so you’d be distracted during the challenges. 

“Wait, what?” you ask, the distraction immediately working. 

“He said that Duncan kissed G—,” Alejandro repeated. 

You were quick to cut him off before turning to face Gwen. “I heard what he said! Gwen? Is that true?” 

She looked at you with guilt written all over her face that only confirmed it. She took a step back, as if expecting you to fight her. And for a moment you thought about it, anger quick to take over. Except heartbreak was quicker to hit when you fully accepted the situation. Your boyfriend and best friend kissed behind your back. 

You turned to look at Duncan who gave you a just as equally guilty look. You had hoped that by looking at him he’d shut down Tyler’s rumor. But when he looked away, you knew it was all true. Your heart cracked in your chest, and everyone was silent, waiting to see what you’d do. Both Duncan and Gwen watched you closely and you could see the fear on their faces. You never got mad or raised your voice, you were one of the few reasonable contestants on this show. It’s what made you so likable and kind of scary with everyone wondering if you’d ever snap. Today might just be the day. 

You turned to look at Cody who hadn’t moved yet, he was watching to see what happens next. No doubt scared that you might do something to Gwen. You kind of felt bad for him, he was sort of betrayed too. It can’t be fun knowing the girl you’ve been pining over kissed someone else. 

“Cody, start flying if you want to win this. Otherwise, if we lose, we’ll be voting Gwen off tonight,” you tell him. 

Your voice is eerily calm but it’s enough to set Cody flapping his poorly made wings. Your words made him determined to win, more so with his team agreeing with you. The Amazons won the challenge in the end which meant Gwen was safe for now. It also meant that Duncan had a chance to be voted off and although you were heartbroken, you didn’t want to see him go yet. 

Once your team is back in first class, you're left alone with your thoughts. And everyone wants to know what you’ll do to Gwen. Courtney is immediately giving you ideas, completely on your side. She had a crush on Duncan, but when he admitted he felt the same for you, she became your number one supporter. Which meant she was the embodiment of your anger now. 

“Hey, can we talk?” Gwen asks, approaching you with a guilty look on her face. 

“She has nothing to say to you!” Courtney exclaimed, standing in front of you. 

Gwen took a step back but looked over at you, nonetheless, silently pleading with you. Courtney looked at you too, arms crossed over her chest with a scowl on her face. You knew you should talk to her about this, but you didn’t want to. Not right now. 

“You heard her, I don’t have anything to say,” you repeat. 

She sighs heavily and walks away with a defeated look on her face. As much as she liked the kiss with Duncan, nothing could get rid of the guilt she felt. She hadn’t meant to betray you like that, it just sort of happened. At least, that’s how she likes to remember it. 

“We can so vote her off in the next challenge,” Courtney says once she’s gone. 

You shake your head, a defeated and broken look on your face. “It won’t change anything.” 

“No, but it’ll make you feel better. And it gives me an excuse to boot her out,” Courtney offers, trying to cheer you up. 

She liked you, which is rare for her, especially given the circumstances. This wasn’t exactly the place to make friends, but she became friends with you. You were the only person she’d deemed worthy enough to make it to the final two. Which is why she was angry for you. And maybe something else that she’d never admit. 

You offer a smile, strained but good enough to seem cheery. “I’d still rather play fair. If we happen to lose a challenge then whatever happens, happens.” 

That was enough for her, deciding to make your team purposely lose. People would suspect it from you but not from her. She could even get Sierra and Heather in on it. 

You wanted to be alone after, sneaking away from first class. You found a corner hidden away from everyone and sank down. Being alone meant you finally felt everything that just happened. Your boyfriend really kissed your best friend. You felt your heart crack inside your chest and the dam finally burst. 

You sobbed into your hands, using them to muffle whatever noises left you. It almost worked, had a certain someone not been snooping around. Alejandro found you in your corner crying your heart out. It’s exactly as he had hoped for. To get you alone and charm his way into your trust. Except standing in front of you now, he wasn’t so sure of his plan. 

“May I offer some comfort?” he asks, sitting beside you. 

You stop crying immediately and wipe your tear stained cheeks. You clear your throat and look away. “No, I’m fine. Completely fine.” 

“Of course, I didn’t mean to insinuate you weren’t,” he says, giving you a charming and gentle smile. 

You furrow your brows and stare at him, seeing straight through him. You didn’t trust Alejandro, from the beginning of this season. You saw what he did to Bridgette and LeShawna. You weren’t going to let him get to you the same way. 

“What do you want?” you ask. 

“My, I didn’t expect such a beautiful lady to be so harsh,” he places a hand over his heart and feigns being hurt. 

It makes you roll your eyes and cross your arms. “Listen, you may have everyone fooled but not me. And I’m not in the mood right now.” 

“I know,” he smiles again, this time showing his true intentions behind it. You were too smart for your own good and there was no point pretending. “But I figured now was as good a time as any.” 

“For?” 

“I propose an alliance between the two of us.” 

“You want an alliance with me? Why?” your eyes narrow and you’re even more weary of him. 

He was quiet for a moment, unsure of how to answer. What excuse could he say without giving away how he really felt? He didn’t want to admit that he actually felt bad and angered. No one should have ever broken your heart, much less someone like Duncan. But saying that out loud would mean having to admit how he felt. He wouldn’t. In a competition like this, feelings were a weakness. 

“To get back at Duncan, of course,” he answers. “If he sees us working together, it’ll irk him. Seeing you move on will definitely be a punch to the gut.” 

“Oh right, it’ll definitely be a punch to the gut when he’s making out with Gwen,” your voice cracks at the end, vision blurring. 

Alejandro’s heart wrenches at your sadness and anger bubbles in his chest. Duncan didn’t deserve you, not for a second. He abandoned you at the beginning of the competition and you just accepted him like it was nothing when he came back. He hated it and he hated you a little bit for it. Except now was his chance to get you to see him and forget about Duncan. 

He wraps an arm around your shoulders without thinking about it. Your pulled closer to him, facing him only inches away. “No offense, but you’re not exactly my type.” 

He laughs and gives you an ever so charming smile. “Don’t worry, that’s not my intention,” he lies. 

“And what are your intentions?” 

“It’s like I said, an alliance with you. Not only will it be revenge on Duncan but I’ll take you to the final two with me.” 

“Oh really? Why would you take me to the final two? I would’ve imagined you’d want someone like Heather.” 

“Heather? While she is lovely, she’s not my type. And I happen to like someone else,” he says, looking at you earnestly. 

Your heart skips a beat and you blame it on your bundled feelings. You push him away, making space between the two of you. Honestly, his deal sounded nice even if he ended up double crossing you. At least you could distract yourself from what Duncan and Gwen did. 

“Okay, on one condition. If you stab me in the back at any point, you vote yourself off.” 

He doesn’t even hesitate as he answers, all that matters is that he’s got you on his side. “Deal.” 

#oneshots #oneshot #one shots #one shot #total drama #total drama one shots #total drama one shot #total drama island #total drama island one shots #total drama island one shot #total drama world tour #total drama world tour one shots #total drama world tour one shot #duncan #duncan one shots #duncan one shot #duncan x reader #alejandro #alejandro one shots #alejandro one shot #alejandro x reader

[thegirlwhorideslikeasamurai]

This scene makes me SO proud of Yuuri as this moment is such an important step in his journey.

Being anxious and having no confidence like Yuuri, naturally puts you in an isolated position. You feel like you're fighting alone and your peers are rivals to you. I'm not talking about the friendly kind of rivalry that motivates and inspires you, but the kind of rivals that feel like live or death competition, a serious threat. It's a lot like "I'm on no one's side because no one is on my side".

Until this point in ep. 5, Yuuri is afraid to mess up at the Regionals because it's his first competition since the disastrous premature end of his last season, and he considers it as a test whether he's in shape for the upcoming Grand Prix Series (he also needs a good result to be eligible to compete at Nationals and have a chance to be assigned to Worlds or 4CC, but that's another story). Being nervous isn't unreasonable, but due to his anxiety and lack of confidence, Yuuri IS unreasonably nervous. As the oldest and most experienced skater competing in the men's event, Yuuri has absolutely no reason to fear failure and a part of him might be aware of that fact, but due to his anxiety, it doesn't register with him. Pretending the other skaters don't exist is less distressing than paying attention to them and interacting with them because Yuuri is in a position where everything they say and do unsettles him: Minami's (apparently totally unreasonable) admiration, being reminded that Minami beat him at the last Nationals, overhearing the other skaters discussing that they want to attempt quads in their free programmes etc. etc.

The standings after the short programme prove how unreasonable Yuuri's anxiety is:

After the SP, Yuuri leads by a 26 point margin. Despite the lowered difficulty Viktor suggested for the FS and the other skaters all attempting one quad, not finishing in first place is EXTREMELY unlikely for a skater with Yuuri's skill and experience even if he messes up in the free skating. Mathematically, it's absolutely possible though and that's what the anxiety brain fixates on.

Here's the thing: when you suffer from anxiety, your brain's ability to form logically sound conclusions can be considerably limited. Yes, you can pretend a threat doesn't exist, but it will keep bothering you from a corner of your mind and continue feeding your anxiety. By ignoring the other skaters, Yuuri can minimise this imagined threat, but it doesn't solve the initial problem: that he sees a threat in these skaters in the first place.

Without Viktor, Yuuri would have kept ignoring the other skaters, which would do nothing to overcome his issues, but in Viktor, Yuuri has someone who believes in him and who mercilessly drags Yuuri out of his comfort zone if needed. After all, just one episode ago, he promised Yuuri to not let him off easily and that's why he doesn't let Yuuri get away with his avoidance strategy. Personally, I believe that Yuuri is blissfully unaware what cheering Minami on might accomplish. He only notices that Viktor is displeased about how Yuuri treats the younger skater who burst into tears because Yuuri keeps ignoring him. Only when Viktor openly voices his dismay, Yuuri has an important realisation:

Minami sees an idol in Yuuri just like Yuuri once saw an idol in Viktor. If Viktor had treated Yuuri the way Yuuri treats Minami, Yuuri would have been devastated (and knowing that Viktor is the sole reason for Yuuri pursuing his goal to become one of the world's best skaters, he might have ended his career). This realisation enables Yuuri to empathise with Minami. But there's so much more going on below the surface. Cheering Minami initiates a change in Yuuri that makes him realise that these younger skaters don't pose a threat to him. It's a first tentative step towards becoming a part of the community of figure skaters, which in fact is quite a friendly place.

This step out of his comfort zone, seems small but it's a turning point in Yuuri's journey. It requires courage, which positively informs his self-worth, and enables Yuuri to see his peers with new eyes. They're still rivals but they've stopped being a threat

and turned into co-competitors Yuuri can relate to and who inspire him to do his best—quite different from the unhealthy mindset of being unsettled and desperate to win Yuuri was in before, right?

Through this small gesture (and the interactions that follow), Yuuri learns that interacting with his co-competitors is actually an empowering experience (and a lot of fun).

Of course, that's only a first tentative step. Becoming confident and learning to interact with your peers is not a linear process. And in every new setting, you must make the effort again, even more so when you're not very sociable by nature. But even though the "threats" at the Grand Prix Series are larger and the stakes are higher, Yuuri is more relaxed there. That is unless he has to deal with additional challenges and we all know what the creators threw into his path *cough*

#yuri on ice #katsuki yuuri #yoi #yoi meta #my yoi meta

[ghostandsoap]

hi there, seen requests were open! i love your gecko series, and i was wondering if i could request a ghost x gecko!reader were they have to get dressed up for a mission and they can't stop looking at each other?

Simon "Ghost" Riley x Fem! "Gecko" Reader

Tags: Undercover work. Sexual tension. Smut if you squint. Playful Ghost.

Word Count: 3.2k

“You won’t be getting anything if you keep this up.”

Undercover jobs aren’t exactly Ghost’s favorite.

There’s something so unsettling about hiding in plain sight with the understanding that one slip up could cause fatal havoc on himself and the rest of his team. Of course he knows that any and every mission is dangerous for various reasons. But, in his opinion, undercover jobs are just a little too dangerous. Despite this, he understands why they’re necessary and the benefits that they provide.

Going undercover is a solid strategy when it comes to scoping out a target without causing a shower of gunfire and a parade of chaos. A calm and collected demeanor is always the best way to ensure the success of an undercover mission.

For this mission in particular, going undercover was practically the only option.

The subject in question was one bad dude, for lack of a better term. He was the leader of a Russian terrorist group producing and exporting chemical weapons for what you knew to be with not-so-good intentions. There was no telling what devious plans he had in store for the missiles, so the team was on it.

Force 141 was now in the middle of nowhere, preparing to conduct an undercover mission to stalk and track the Russian terrorist leader to find just exactly what his plans were.

Surprisingly, the team acquired information that led them to a rather…odd location.

It wasn’t totally uncommon for an undercover mission to take place in an otherwise public location. Those kinds of places were ideal for finding a target, and the hustle of it all was a great way to go unnoticed.

However, a bar in the middle of nowhere in remote Russia was not where you were expecting to end up.

The Russian leader was known to visit the establishment every week on the same day and around the same time. It was guaranteed that he would be there, and that was the golden window of opportunity.

An undercover ploy was put into effect. Two of the team members would go into the establishment as nothing more than first-time visitors. Staying under the radar while listening for intel and watching for the Russian boss was critical.

The mission was fairly simple: find the target, get the information, and don’t get caught. 

It was decided that you and Ghost were best for this job. The infamous Gecko and Ghost duo was unbreakable. The two of you worked well together and fit one another perfectly. Playing off one another would be important, and no one was better for the job than you two.

It wasn’t like it would be hard to pose as a couple while working undercover. After all, that wasn’t exactly a lie.

You and Ghost spent a couple of days preparing for this undercover mission, mentally prepping yourselves and deciding what you would need to blend in. There was usually a decent amount of prep work when it came to these sorts of things, and this was no exception. 

Not only did you have to act the part, but you had to dress for it too.

“Hey, Ghost?” You called from the closet that you were currently inside of.

The team was holed up in a small house (if you could even call it that) for the duration of this mission. It was a simple structure, a little cramped for all of 141 to fit inside of. It was mainly empty with a few pieces of beaten furniture strewn about. There was one empty room that you could only assume was supposed to be the bedroom, which is the space that you and Ghost were utilizing to get ready.

“Yeah?” The gravelly voice replied from the other side, where he was also getting changed.

“Don’t you think this attire is a bit…formal?” You questioned as you stepped into the black number that Laswell had presented to you.

Ghost chuckled at that. When it came to these kinds of missions, he didn’t ask too many questions. 

“I don’t know, doll. This is just what they gave us.” He buttoned the column of buttons on his shirt.

“Hmm,” You hummed thoughtfully. “Are you going to lose the mask tonight?”

“Very funny,” He said flatly. “Not a chance, Gecko.”

“Don’t you think that will compromise us?” You grinned, although he couldn’t see you from the outside of the closet.

He could hear the smirk in your tone, which brought an amused smile to spread from underneath the black fabric of his balaclava. 

“If it does, then you and Johnny can hassle me about it,” He buckled his belt onto his slacks. “Are you almost ready?”

With a few final adjustments, you stepped out from the closet with a small smile, revealing the outfit that was much more outstanding than your usual kind of clothing. It was a simple, short dress that showed off the shape of your frame that usually buried underneath layers of gear and tactical clothing. 

His eyes nearly popped out of his head. His dark eyes peering from the opening of his mask were wide and glittering with desire. Certainly Ghost had seen it all before, but it was just so…different in this kind of situation. 

It wasn’t often that Ghost was able to ogle over you like this while on a job, and it was something that he was going to take advantage of.

For a moment, Ghost was sure that Laswell was playing a painfully beautiful trick on him. She put you in that dress and expected him to be able to maintain his composure on a critical mission? 

This was torture.

His eyes were wandering, and he didn’t even try to hide it. His mind was racing. This kind of racing that had him dreaming up a dozen different scenarios with each one ending up with you gripping the sheets and whimpering his name with pure ecstasy. 

“Oh baby…” He purred. “I don’t know if I can do this.”

Ghost himself was cleaned up nicely. A black button down shirt and slacks that also showed off assets of his body that were usually hidden away. It brought a tingle to your face and a certain heat to your legs. It wasn’t often that you were blessed with the sight of Ghost being dressed up and stylish. 

“Why not?” You asked him, although you knew exactly what he meant because you were having the exact same kind of sinful thoughts.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to complete this job when you look so…gorgeous.”

His hand reached for yours, the chill of his skin feeling vastly different from your warmth. He had “I want you” written all over his face…well, the part of his face that you could actually see. His free arm came to wrap around your waist, bringing you into the front of his frame. 

“We…we have a job to do, Ghosty.” You breathed slowly to keep yourself calm and cool.

“Oh, I know, baby.” He rumbled.

He raised the bottom of his balaclava, and kissed you quickly, but it was a kiss that said more than words ever could.

“Promise me that when we’re finished…you’re all mine for the rest of the night.” He demanded.

A rush of fire flushed through your core and shot out at your feet. This was going to be one hell of a job to complete.

“That can be arranged.” 

***

The bar was much smaller than you were expecting…and even then, you were expecting a small pub. 

It was a cabin really. The wooden floors creaked when you walked on the boards, and the walls groaned with every bitter cold wind gust blowing from the outside. 

The air smelled of booze and stale cigarettes, a scent that you would definitely be carrying on your clothes when this was over. 

Incandescent light bulbs were hanging from the ceiling, offering a source of illumination that was nearly burned out in certain places. 

The establishment could hold maybe 30 people. It was cramped for sure, and you were just glad that it wasn’t a totally full house on that particular night. Still, even then the bar was a tight fit. 

You and Ghost were successfully able to slip in mainly undetected. It was pretty obvious that the two of you weren’t regular visitors, so staying on the down low was critical. The less suspicion, the better.

“Stay close to me,” Ghost murmured in your ear, keeping a hand on your lower back to guide you through the crowd. “I don’t want to lose sight of you.”

Ghost towered over many of the guests in the bar. He was a giant, so keeping his head low was difficult. There were a couple of odd stares. A strange masked man and a strange (yet dashing) woman hand-in-hand was bound to draw some attention.

Nonetheless, no one was yelling Russian obscenities or shooting, so you were still in the clear.

There was an empty table at the back of the bar, tucked away in the corner that was much dimmer than the rest of the room. It was a decent place to lay low, but it still gave you a good view of the entire bar.

The chatter from the Russian bar-goers was loud enough to where you and Ghost could talk comfortably, as long as you were keeping an eye on who was watching.

“Keep it casual, you two. No mistakes.” Price’s voice sounded in your ear, once you were comfortably seated.

Price and the rest of the team were in a secure location, listening and monitoring the perimeter of the outside to give you eyes to the areas you couldn’t see from the inside.

“Copy.” You replied.

“Anything yet, Captain?” Ghost asked, being sure to take the seat at the table that faced the door.

“Not yet. Have some patience, Lieutenant.” Price replied.

Ghost let out a quiet huff, a sign that he was antsy and ready to get this finished. Ghost’s dislike for undercover work was showing. He wasn’t still and stoic like usual. He was fidgety and looked like he wanted to combust.

“Well…at least we’re not overdressed.” You laughed, noting the fact that, despite its simplicity, the bar seemed to have a dress code.

“Laswell knew what she was doing.” Ghost reassured you.

“She always does,” You smiled. “Do you think it would be indecent to get a drink?”

Ghost’s brows furrowed in an amused expression, the silhouette of his grin appearing from behind his mask. If you were going to play the part, then he supposed it only made sense to really commit to it.

“You don’t speak Russian.” He remarked.

“No, but I can manage. Besides, they have the good stuff here. I can’t pass that up.” You grinned.

Ghost eyeballed the distance from the bar area to the table. He wanted to be sure that he could see you at all times because the last thing he wanted was for you to get cornered by some creep. 

“Go for it,” Ghost nodded. “Make it two.”

“Make it two…?”

Ghost rolled his eyes, knowing that Soap was having a field day listening to this exchange.

“Please.” Ghost corrected, forcing his smile to stay shielded by the mask.

“That’s better,” You snickered. “Be right back.”

Ghost kept an eye on you as you walked away, watching like a hawk for anyone who even remotely looked at you funny. He also was getting a fine view of your outfit from behind, which sent a shudder down his spine that fizzled into his toes. He shifted in his seat as he watched, his hips readjusting as he tried to push his lustful thoughts away. He needed to hold it together just until the end of the night. He couldn’t blow his cover over this. He’d never hear the end of it.

He witnessed you interact with the Russian barkeep, who somehow seemed to know exactly what you wanted despite the fact that Ghost was sure that your Russian speaking-skills were less than present. His eyes squinted when he followed your frame back to your table, your smile growing brighter as you delivered the two drinks.

“I’m impressed. How did that work out?” Ghost asked, curious to know how you had successfully pulled off this encounter.

“Do you know how much alcohol the Russians drink? Like 75% of the world’s vodka is consumed here,” You remarked, sliding one of the glasses to your lover. “Whiskey for you. Vodka for me.”

“Thanks, G.” Ghost took the glass into his hand.

The glass seemed miniature in his large hand, but he held it so carefully and gently. Ghost peered down into the amber liquid, rotating the glass to watch the drink follow gravity. He took a slow first sip from under his mask, one that would get into his system as quickly as possible. He hoped that it would settle his nerves and keep himself grounded. 

“How are you holding up?” You asked, which brought Ghost back from his busy mind.

“I’m alright,” He answered. “Why do you ask?”

“You look like you’re about to dissolve into your chair.” You remarked. 

“I don’t like to wait.” He muttered, his foot brushing against yours as a suggestive motion.

Your eyes darted right, taking note of who was around in case this conversation took a turn. Not that anyone there was listening or spoke much English — but it was still an immediate reaction. Your conversing back and forth dwindled down when he began to look you over, a tell-tale sign that he was thinking hard about something.

He admired the way your skin glowed in the dim light of the bar, and he wanted nothing more than to whisk you away to a private room and kiss every inch of it. It had been a few weeks since he had really had some private time with you. It was hard to get away when you were on a mission. 

He couldn’t wait for when this was all over.

The conversation had dwindled off and gone stale. A new focus had infiltrated your attention spans, and it was hard to tear away from.

Your eyes followed his hands and up his forearms, studying the way that his biceps were so perfectly outlined in the shirt he was wearing. Apparently, he wasn’t the only one having a hard time keeping the sinful thoughts pushed away. The room that was so crowded before suddenly felt empty, as if there was no way that anyone in the room could see that you and Ghost were eye-fucking each other.

“What’s your status, Lieutenant? You’ve gone quiet on me.” Price spoke, causing both of you to give a slight jump. 

Ghost’s eyes never left you, the tone in his words causing you to have your turn with readjusting in your seat. 

“All good, Captain. Just keeping an eye out.” 

“Copy. Nothing out here yet.” Price replied, completely unaware of what was happening.

Suddenly, one of Ghost’s legs wrapped around yours, his strong calf intertwining with yours and forcing you to lean over the table towards him. A heat rushed into your face, a hot blush burning under your cheeks that seemed to spread down your chest. 

“Ghost,” You warned, keeping your voice only loud enough for him to hear. “Focus.”

“I am focused, Gecko. I’m very focused.” He leaned closer to you, his elbows resting on the tabletop.

“I promised that you can have me after. Don’t do this now.” You pleaded.

“Oh, but you look so good now, darling.” His knee worked its way under your skirt, nudging the area between your legs.

It wasn’t a large table by any means, and his tall legs were doing nothing but playing in his favor. His eyebrows were furrowed in mischief. He knew good and well what he was doing.

“You’re making this harder than it needs to be.” You grumbled.

“But it is a little fun…isn’t it, baby?” He cooed, his eyes narrowing the way they did when he knew that he had you pinned.

This was Ghost’s way of taking advantage of an entertaining opportunity. It was fun for you to watch him squirm, but it was even better when he got to see you do it. He knew if he kept this up, then you’d be desperate to get out of here. 

It didn’t change the fact that you were stuck here until the job was done. No amount of sexual tension and loving desire in the world would make either of you bail (because, frankly, that wasn’t even an option). But it was still a blast to see just how much the other person could take. 

Ghost maneuvered his knee further underneath your dress which caused you to jump and make a quiet squeak when the top of his kneecap made contact with the outside fabric of your now damp panties. 

“Simon, stop it.” You hissed. 

One of your hands was wrapped around the glass of your drink, and if you squeezed any harder, it was going to shatter right there in your hand. 

“That’s Ghost to you, Gecko.” He rumbled, his knee beginning to make gentle, yet calculated motions. 

“You won’t be getting anything if you keep this up.” You tried your best to put on your “bad cop” persona, but it was a very thin facade.

“But you promised me. A promise is a promise, is it not?” He bantered back, satisfaction running rampant through his eyes. 

It seemed that glaring at him from across the table didn’t have the effect that you had been trying for. If anything, it was only egging him on. Instinctively, your hips rotated forward against his leg, a quick rush of pleasure coursing through you until he snatched it back.

“Easy, Gecko. That’s a little indecent, don’t you think?” He tutted. 

“I’ll show you something indecent.” You growled back.

“Oh, I know you will.” He smirked.

Just when you were completely about to lose it, Price’s voice sounded in your ear. 

“Gecko. Ghost. The target just made entry,” Price suddenly spoke, his thick accent distracting you from the conversation at hand. “He’s got two escorts with him. Big and burly bastards.” 

Ghost went into lieutenant mode (thankfully) and snapped his head in the direction towards the door. It gave you a few seconds to collect yourself and prepare to work towards getting this job finished. Sure enough, there was an older man, who seemed to fit the Russian leader image. There were two men standing behind him (more like over him) that were towering and buff. That was definitely your guy.

“Wait for him to get settled, then get closer to him,” Price instructed. “Get the intel and get out unnoticed…if you can.” 

“10/4.” You answered.

“Copy.” Ghost echoed.

The Russian target circled the bar scoping out a place that was fitting for himself and his posse. He passed by you and Ghost once or twice, not seeming to mark either of you as an immediate threat. You and Ghost made sure to keep up the “civilian couple” role for the duration of this interaction. Your eyes never left his, although it was for a very different reason. Ghost was going to pay big time for this one. Getting you all hot and bothered on a mission was definitely not something that you would be letting slide by. 

“Pick this up later?” Ghost asked, not even hiding the grin underneath his balaclava. 

You would get him back one day, but for now, you just wanted to make it to your promised end goal of the evening.

“You’re on."

#simon riley #simon riley x reader #simon riley x fem! reader #simon riley x female reader #simon riley x you #simon riley x y/n #simon riley x gecko #simon riley imagine #simon riley one shot #simon riley fanfiction #ghost x reader #ghost x fem! reader #ghost x female reader #ghost x you #ghost x y/n #ghost x gecko #ghost imagine #ghost one shot #ghost fanfiction #mw2 ghost #mw2 #mw2 fanfic #mw2 fanfiction #request #ghostandsoap

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I(26nb) stopped answering my ex (27nb) or asked them to stop messaging me?

They aren't asking to get back together. A while back, my partner dumped me bc we just weren't talking as much, were into different things, and drifted apart. Normal stuff people break up over all the time. They told me there was no hard feelings on their end, and I was the same. It was kind of a bummer but the fact that I wasn't especially upset was evidence the relationship was dead at that point.

At the time, my New Ex™️ asked if I needed space or if it would be okay to check in on me from time to time and make sure I was okay because, even though I said I was fine, they were worried about the effect this would have on my mental health. I'm clinically depressed and they were aware things had gotten pretty drastic years before we even met, but the entire time we knew each other I was stable, and even when I was low I wasn't a danger to myself. I have meds and a good therapist and a lot of practice with coping strategies, I'm good to go, I got a handle on myself before we met and I still have a handle on myself now. Obviously mental health isn't a guaranteed thing and just because I'm currently okay doesn't mean I always will be, but I have the tools to handle it when needed.

All this to say, when they asked if they could check up on my mental health, I was a little taken aback, wondering if they thought this would drive me to something extreme and if so why would they think that. I assured them that I was fine, totally stable and doing well and they had nothing to worry about, but I'd like to stay friends so sure, message me whenever you want.

I figured they'd check in on me in the immediate aftermath, which they did, but I thought that once that aftermath had passed they would go back to messaging me more conversationally, if at all. But since then, they keep doing "check in's" every few weeks to make sure I'm okay. This is not something they did when we were dating. I've been playing along because I'm the one who said it was okay, but I'm starting to feel a little bit weird about it?

Maybe I'm being too sensitive but it rubs me the wrong way that they only message me to do these check-ins, as if they think I'm going to fly off the deep end because we broke up. As if messaging me isn't having a convo with a friend but is instead some sort of wellness check they're obligated to perform. Like I said, I was taken aback to begin with by the implications of this, but now that they're still treating me like that months later, it's kind of pissing me off.

They literally just say "checking in" and nothing else, and they don't seem keen to converse otherwise. It gives me wellness check vibes which bothers me because I'm not in crisis, I've never been in crisis while they've known me, and them dumping me certainly didn't change that. I cannot emphasize enough that even when I was deep in depressive lows while we dated, it was never their job to do this sort of thing and they only started doing it after we broke up. It feels like they think I'm too weak or too unstable to actually be okay without them, even though I've repeatedly said that I'm currently thriving and to my knowledge there's no reason for them to think I'm currently a danger to myself.

Part of me wants to just start ignoring the messages but I'm worried that if this person thinks I'm so at-risk they need to keep checking on me months and months after dumping me, they might assume the worst if I just stop answering. The rest of me wants to just ask them to knock it off, but in that case I'm worried I'll come off as defensive and unreasonable, like I'm being offended over someone caring about my wellbeing, or that my frustration with this behaviour will make it come off harsher than I want it to. I don’t want to attack them for being worried about me, even if I find the degree of worry a bit insulting at this point.

My ex does not have an anxiety disorder and is not an anxious person at all. I have never threatened to do anything to myself in the time they've known me, and my reaction to the breakup was very calm and casual. I don’t know why they're acting like this, but it feels... I dunno, infantilizing? Condescending? I don’t know how exactly to describe it other than that it kind of feels like a slap in the face after the years and years of work I put into getting to this point with my mental health, none of which I needed them or even knew them for.

Would I be the asshole if I asked them to stop and was honest about why? Should I just ask them to stop and not elaborate? But then, if they ask, I don't want to lie, but maybe this is a situation where honesty isn't the best policy? Should I keep my mouth shut because they aren't actually doing anything wrong and I'm the one who said I fine with them checking on me? I was fine with it in the short-term, if a bit confused, but I never imagined it would still be going on months later.

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

I think this latest article is as much a Kate slander piece as it is a manifestation PR for Meghan. It is certainly aimed at painting a certain picture as you pointed out.

There have been rumours that the PR company did a brand image survey for Meghan and most of the feedback they got was that the public is increasingly against Meghan because of how much she has bashed the BRF. It's been putting people off and it's one of the reasons Meghan isn't getting any work.

So putting it out there that from now on she will not rely of the total image is., Stay away from the royals is a way of reassuring prospective clients that she is overhauling her image and is looking for new work in her own right, as opposed to riding on Harry's coattails.

But it's odd, because to me it seems like she is now doing her own work vis a vis fashion influencer plus she is basking in any glory of any good work Harry does it., Invictus. She only stays away from.his controversial stuff like the book, polo and grovelling to the BRF and whining about his mean daddy taking away military roles. Everything else, she wants to be a part of.like it's her birthright.

As for the Kate bashing, yes of course she will do that. Because that's a sure shit way of antagonizing William. And she doesn't want Harry and William to be on any sort of good terms at all, now or in the future. I do think, Charles, for a his faults, has largely ghosted Harry since he became king. And any form of solid reconciliation has been left up to Williams descretion. This is probably mostly because Harry is also estranged from a lot of the extended family because of Meghan. (Except Eug maybe?).

Any plans that BP or the king's team is hinting at is merely for show, so that worse comes worst, in case of any eventuality (like a divorce or Harry's public humiliation) he will have some sort of landing pad back in London. Not an actual royal home or a royal role, but family sympathy. I dont think on a personal level, Charles, Camilla or William have any more fucks to give about Harry and his Scar cosplay.

Looking at Joe Jonas and Sophie's drama makes me think that meghan would certainly encourage Harry to go to England spend more time there, and then she will play a blinder like Joe did on Sophie.

On your last point (the Joe/Sophie drama) - there used to be an accurate tarot reader here in the early days whose reading on a Sussex divorce saw it happening during the wintertime and one of them would be blindsided by the filing. Seeing your comment here reminded me of that reading. It really does seem like Meghan is trying to line it up for a blinder. After all, Meghan hasn't had an original idea since the 1990s. Why not steal Joe Jonas's divorce strategy?

This is just my opinion but I think the brand analysis actually happened. I've done some research and my conclusion is that it is standard industry procedure to do a brand analysis any time there's an acquisition, no matter what kind of track record the individual has. (Another reason why I think there was one, and this is just my personal observation, is because Meghan is such a polarizing and controversial person. WME wouldn't have taken her on willy-nilly without understanding what they were getting themselves into, even if they signed her as a favor to Serena, as the text messages going around allege.)

And absolutely, anything the BRF does with Harry is largely because of familial duty. You can still be sympathetic to someone's struggles and help them through it without having to personally like them. If there's one thing the royal family understands, it's duty and they probably all collectively understand that giving Harry a landing pad is their duty - not exclusively because they're family but because the monarchy calls for it. There are probably parallels to Diana here - Diana did a lot of damage when she said she wasn't supported or helped, and Charles can't afford the crisis Harry will cause if he doesn't show up for Harry. (They were able to handle the drama Meghan stirred up during the Oprah interview by having The Queen point out that Meghan is an unreliable narrator and the only reason The Queen's statement worked is because she had 69 years of authority and respect behind her words. Charles is lucky no one rolls their eyes in his presence when he demands the same gravitas.)

#ask

[houseofbrat]

Still so William let his cancer stricken wife being trolled online for the mother day pictures as well have her carry bags during at the farmers market. William sigh

That's the worst part. She had cancer all along and William was like "all right under the bus you go Cathy!"

Meanwhile the stans are calling him a hot zaddy and lusting after him.

Granted we are on Reddit so I guess the bare minimum is expected for men.

They have an entire press office and people that they pay to be their mouthpiece to the public.  Why the hell didn’t they just hand all of this off to them to have a plan to roll out to the public?  How did this go so badly?

Honestly, I'd love to know the whole story. Just to be clear, I mean the whole story of the PR fiasco, not Kate's specific medical problems.

This might be an incredibly unpopular opinion, not sure, but I really disagree with everyone saying oh she shouldn't have had to tell us about her cancer, she should have full privacy, etc. I agree with those thoughts for celebrities and influencers, but for people supposed to lead a country and whose lives are being fully funded by taxpayers, I do think they owe a duty of transparency around their health. I'm in the U.S. and we've all seen outrage because Biden's defense secretary kept cancer a secret for like a day, because Trump refused to release his physical results, I could go on.

I think it’s a really hard judgement to make because royalty is such a unique role, and there really isn’t much to compare it to.  Not to mention that there are 2 separate questions: what was she obligated to announce and what should they have expected as far as levels of curiosity about a high profile public figure.  I do think that there would have been strategies that they could have used to better preserve privacy in the face of public curiosity.

I agree. I tend to think royalty doesn't get to be totally private about major life events but that doesn't mean they don't deserve ANY privacy. I just feel like the outraged comments about how sad it is she was forced to tell people because of their evil speculating ways are going too far in the other direction.

I don't think she necessarily has to share a diagnosis, but expecting that she could disappear entirely from public view and no-one would ask any questions is ridiculous. They had at least two months to come up with any plan besides complete silence.

I never wanted them to discuss her medical issues but transparency would have helped. Don't treat people like idiots. They mishandled this, and there were a million ways to keep things private but not have things turn into a cluster. Prayers for Catherine.

in terms of prognosis...

"preventive" chemotherapy is a positive sign here

the fact that the surgeon did not recognize he was looking at a cancer tumor in the OR is a positive sign here

the fact that it required a complex biopsy (it took 5 weeks) for the pathology to find the cancer is a positive sign.

Having been through this recently with a spouse, what you’re saying sounds correct to me too.  She would have had the best of diagnostic tools, so that would have ruled out large masses.  The language also indicates that what they found was small.

whoever ran the PR definitely did it poorly. Part of the reason the mother's day photo blew into a bigger news event was all the major news agencies put out a kill notice on it. and they only did that because Kensington palace declined to share the unedited one when asked.

Chetwynd said news agencies asked Kensington Palace to provide the original photo, but they did not receive a reply. That’s when they decided to issue “kill notices,” something that is very rarely done.

but they didn’t stick to the timeline.. they decided to reveal a doctored image and then make Kate take the fall for it. even if she did edit the picture on her own just for fun, they didn’t have to put it on her alone? the whole thing was so odd.

They could have skipped the fake photo release. They could have reacted to the swell of interest by putting out a statement that there have been developments and they will communicate when they are ready. To pretend nothing happened since the Jan announcement is disingenuous and PR is about real time handling

#my gif #reddit #british royal family #PR fail #kate middleton #Catherine The Princess of Wales #kensington palace #palace officials #MESS! #William The Prince of OWN GOALS #William The Weak #William The Terrible #William The Prince of Wales #prince william

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

Right, I'm back. I didn't post anything yesterday because I thought it's best not to rush. But it was indeed fascinating to see reactions in real time to the photo. Yes, I'm talking about the photo posted on IG of JM, JK and another person.

I think I must have read opinions that varied on a entire spectrum and expressed quite vehemently. It's safe to say everyone has really strong opinions and you either condemn it or you're totally fine with it, as long as you pick a side and don't question anything. In sitautions such as these, the tendency to add just a touch of conspiracy is right there. And it gets a pass when there's a lack of information, a language barrier, etc.

I too have my own questions and observations, to which I don't necesarily need an answer, but I'll just write them down.

1. I couldn't help but think of how deep the level of social media stalking is in this fandom. I looked up the account immediately as I saw a screenshot because initially there was confusion about the source. That guy made no previous photo uploads of either JM or JK. At a first glance, there is nothing to connect him to them. And still he had fan accounts following him, before it all blew up and he gained a lot more. My question is, how did that happen? Are there people who look up Jimin's followers list and they try to figure out if there's someone from an inner circle? In all those 50 million people? Do they check some select few accounts daily to see if there's a possibility of a post? The logistics of this are giving me a headache. Or maybe there's some obvious, easier answer and I don't know it.

2. Considering that the account is public, it's not like the photo is leaked. I don't know exactly the nature of the relationship that man has/had with JM & JK and I do not wish to make any speculation with regards to his intentions.

3. I think the outrage was mostly caused by jikookers bringing back to the surface that old photo under the heart arch. Which indeed paints a certain picture, but it's also not the most incriminatory thing out there. I don't think there's any real actual danger, considering that it was supposedly taken from Jungkook's dad Kakao talk. If that's true then it means the dad was ok with showing it.

3. What I personally believe should not have happened was to circulate that photo so easily on social media. People knew about it for a long time, even before someone posted it on I-Jikook twitter. But in cases like these, the photos will always be revealed. They will leave the group chats and out into the wild usually for a petty reason. Because at the end of the day, that's the issue. It has nothing to do with giving a shit about the people in the photo, it's about winning a shipping argument, about screaming "we won". Win what exactly???? It shows who is in it for the fantasy. No single argument could work for them. Replying on and on about deleting doesn't matter.

4. Maybe my last point, but this situation has revealed some things which were already known, but maybe not really articulated specifically all the time. As people not only part of the fandom, but also using social media 24/7, our ideas about privacy and what we should have access to when it comes to public figures has certainly been influenced by the current landscape. In the case of JM & JK particularly, they have been sharing pieces of themselves for more than a decade. It was the BH strategy, the BTS brand. It worked wonders because look at the huge fandom it gathered and the relationship that was built between idol and fan. Hell, Jungkook is doubling down heavy on it with his livestreams. How can anyone really expect a mass of people to really stop and think about privacy? We ourselves as regular people curate our social media image and we voice our opinions and share the places we go to, who are our friends, what parties we attended, when we get into a relationship. Every mundane or special occassion is posted for public consumption. I'm not saying this as some excuse that would justify sharing what looks like a private photo. What I'm saying is that it's to be expected in a way. As harsh as it is, but we live in this reality where the line between the public and private sphere is getting more invisible day by day.

What I think it's scary is that if there's a situation in which an actual compromising photo would somehow be leaked and which can be in the detriment of the people in it for various reasons, so called fans would still share it as proof. Because it doesn't matter for them. It's the high of finding it, of screaming about it on social media, without thinking for more than a second about possible implications. Everything needs to be done fast, regardless of consequences because people need to feed themselves with gossip and leaks.

I'm really just rambling here and not making too much sense. Anyway, I think we should always take a step back and really assess the situation and not scream about it, regardless of our position. Not everything is a threat, or privacy violation or putting people in danger, but it doesn't mean that it needs to be treated lightly as if it's no big deal (which usually comes from people who care more about their own safisfaction and feeling like a "winner").

#m thoughts #jikook #jimin #jungkook

[fallout-drabbles-n-stuff]

Idk if you‘ve done this before, but companions and their favourite video game genres? 🤔

For some reason I see Preston enjoying farming sims - being part of a close knit community and helping improve it. Also probably city builder-type games. (The only kind of settlement-esque joke I will ever make about my beloved cowboy husband)

And while writing this I also had to think of Curie doing review videos of all sorts of medical games. Imagine her doing a series on smth like Two Point Hospital, I imagine that‘d be kinda cute.

(Ooh this is fun!)

Cait:

She really likes the more old school type of arcade games. (If you consider that to be a genre in itself, I totally do) Things like Donkey Kong, Frogger, and Pac-man are her jam.

Curie:

I think the ask really hit the nail on the head with her. I can totally see her liking medical games but more specifically things like surgery simulators.

Danse:

It might sound crazy but I firmly believe Danse would enjoy sandbox style games. Things were he can build up a world of his own and have decent freedom is something he’d enjoy. His favorite is Minecraft but he won’t admit it.

Deacon:

He is an avid enjoyer of MMORPG style games. He really likes fucking with people, that’s honestly why. Games like Day Z and Dead by Daylight is where he shines.

Gage:

He prefers games that require a bit of strategy behind them with tons of action. His taste isn’t too picky but if he had to pick an absolute favorite..something like Marvel’s Midnight Suns would be right up his alley. (Also Gage is a huge nerd, I just know it)

Hancock:

Big time lover of old times platform games. Give him OG Mario and he’s happier than a lark.

Macready:

Okay..it’s tempting to say the sniper would enjoy shooting games but in all actuality his favorite is fantasy rpg. Games like Skyrim are his bread and butter and he will spend an unhealthy amount of time on them.

Maxson:

If asked he’ll claim strategy but in truth his favorite is anything with a good adventure to it. Anything with exploration, optional problem solving but minimal pressure on his character makes him happy.

Nick:

Does online solitaire count?

Piper:

She is all about classic fighting games. Mortal Kombat is something she doesn’t play around with..she’s an obnoxious gamer too btw.

Preston:

He just likes a game that puts him in a nice, calm setting where he can still feel useful. Games like Stardew Valley or even Animal Crossing are great in his opinion.

X6-88:

You know those old computer games where you could shoot kittens out of canons? That’s it.

#fallout 4 #fallout #fo4 companions #paladin danse #fallout companions #danse #curie #elder maxson #porter gage

[trashcanfills]

Genshin Impact x Reader - Being an absolute Genius Invocation TCG nerd

Feat. Itto, Cyno (of course), and Kaeya because those are the ones I know who are into the game. Can be seen as mostly platonic but I added a bit of optional romance headcanons at the end for each character. Reader here is gender-neutral.

Ok so I’m getting some brain worms today in the form of the genius invocation tcg event like bruh

As someone who loves the card game and gets REALLY into it, can you imagine a reader agt the genshin cast while playing? Reader who’s such a dedicated player that they know the strats, the meta, and different deck playstyles. Reader who goes to the Cat’s Tail to hang out with fellow players and duels them on the daily enough that they have a reputation for being a pro.

It would be even more hilarious if they don’t exactly advertise this hobby (cough obsession) at all to anyone else outside the game, but the moment someone engages them in a duel or they go into places like the Cat’s Tail where many other players gather, or they attend any tcg related event? They go hardcore mode.

Itto sees you buying the latest tcg cards and he saunters up to you, bragging about how good he is at the game in an attempt to impress you lmao. Your curiosity is piqued and thus decide to challenge Itto for the funsies. At that, the oni is all “ho ho ho sure but don’t get too upset when I win, alright?”

Except you wipe his deck off the floor and Itto is. Flabbergasted while you try not to laugh too hard at his reaction. Like bruh even his gang spectating the duel had lost their hopes of their boss winning at all when they witness how outmatched Itto is against you the whole game. Itto’s character cards are all gone and yet only ONE of your character cards has taken some damage. That’s how skewed the matchup was.

Of course, as it is with Itto, expect him to challenge you again and again until he gets a win. In the meantime, you start coaching Itto about the game more, help to optimise his deck, and point out his mistakes and what he could have done better. Itto is an eager student and is in awe when you explain the strats and reasoning behind them. Itto isn’t exactly the brightest but damn even he can see that you know what the fuck you’re doing (if he’s crushing on you he’ll think that’s hot af. You’re so amazing?? And he gets to learn and spend time with you hehe totally not part of his master plan to get closer to you).

The moment Cyno notices you have a tcg deck, he’s going to immediately challenge you. Cyno goes all out and dramatic in calling out his challenge, as how it’s done in those card game medias. He absolutely HAS to battle any fellow tcg player since he’s that hardcore of a tcg nerd. The two of you will eventually engage in a duel (if you’re in a public place, expect to attract a LOT of attention because Cyno is too well known as the general mahamatra AND a proud tcg gamer). The man even narrates some of his actions while playing since he’s that much of a fucking dork. How adorable.

It’s a tense yet action-packed match. Cyno is a very good player, but evidently so are you. Spectators (if you guys are somewhere public) are starting to exchange bets on who would win. No one knows who’s going to come out on top because the two of you are so evenly matched that it could go either way. Cyno has that determined glint in his eyes as he figures out ways to beat you, yet somehow you anticipate his strategy and neutralise it, and vice versa.

Regardless of who wins though, it’s by a close margin. Cyno extends an invitation to play more matches with you whenever he’s free. How could he not when he just had the most thrilling duel of his life? You take up on his offer, since there are few players who can go toe-to-toe with you, and you can recognise that Cyno is a fellow tcg nerd like you. Boy, you two are going to get along so well. I can imagine both of you having conversations about the card metas and deckbuilding, which can sound like absolute nonsense to anyone who isn’t as hardcore abt the game. (And if Cyno has a crush on you, rip Tighnari because he has to witness the man blunders about in trying to earn your affections - keyword: TRY - and the fennec fox hybrid facepalms when Cyno keeps using tcg as a incredibly convenient excuse to hang out with you. For love of Lesser Lord Kusanali-)

Kaeya somehow picks up the fact that you’re into tcg (even if you don’t bring it up to him at all, he will know thanks to his ability to get others to share info with him, and some ppl might have mentioned you being an absolute BEAST at the game). So what does he do about it? Bring it up to you, of course, and ask if you wanna play a round or two.

Note that Kaeya isn’t a full-on hardcore nerd about the game. That’s not his thing. He doesn’t exactly know the ins and outs of the cards, but he has an incredibly strategic mindset that helps him beat most players. How else do you think he got to the final round in the tcg event competition? Still, Kaeya is absolutely intrigued when you match up against him, and said intrigue increases when you’re clearly winning. Seems like it’s true when he heard those rumors of you being an expert in tcg. He’s full on smirking when you beat him, and he claps slowly while congratulating you on your win and complimenting your skills (yet with the way he’s acting, it seems like he’s won somehow).

After that match, Kaeya will occasionally play a few rounds of tcg with you in his free time. I mean, he gets to sharpen his mind, hang out with you, gain information and be entertained. An all-round plus in his book. (And if somehow Kaeya has feelings that a biit more than platonic towards you, he’s going to use tcg as a way to get closer to you. Heck, he might even start paying closer attention to your tips and strategies to formulate a game plan. Be wary if he makes a bet with you through tcg, cus that means he’s got something planned. And if he happens to win the game and the bet? Well, hope you don’t mind doing a favor for him in the form of a kiss, maybe even a dinner date.

#genshin impact x reader #itto x reader #kaeya x reader #cyno x reader #arataki itto x reader #genius invokation tcg #if u cant tell I made this cus I realised there arent many posts whereby reader is a dedicated tcg player #and in those fics when reader plays agt the characters they lose lol #i mean thats fine cus some ppl do relate to that and dont play the card game well #but this is for my fellow tcg addicts who love the card game #yes im one of those who loves the big update cus NOW I GET TO CHALLENGE MORE CHARACTERS MWAHHAHAHAHAH #i am one of those bitches who uses a freeze deck sorry #if only I can play agt the genshin characters rather than their ai :(((( like I wanna see how i compare #ai sucks cus I have seen too many occasions where they fuck up #ah whelp

[evidence-based-activism]

https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10508-023-02717-0

In an online survey of 1124 heterosexual British men using a modified CDC National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey, 71% of men experienced some form of sexual victimization by a woman at least once during their lifetime.

Hello!

So, I'm guessing this question is reference to the discussion from a few days ago?

In short, the linked study did not collect data in a way that can be generalized to a larger population. Therefore, the lifetime prevalence that "71% of men experienced some form of sexual victimization by a woman" cannot be viewed as accurate and is likely a significant over-estimate. I'll go into more detail about this below:

Question: What sort of data collection methods allow for generalization?

Answer:

In short, data from a sample can only be generalized to a population if the sample is representative of that population. In "pure" statistics, this would mean a random sample (also referred to as "probability sampling").

In reality, we often cannot take a truly random sample (due to constraints involving time, money, ethics, etc.). So, we attempt to create a "representative" sample instead.

In some cases we can justify generalizing results from a convenience (e.g., volunteer) sample when we don't expect volunteers to differ from non-volunteers. In most cases however, there is reason to believe that those who would volunteer for a study are different than those who would not. (Think of something like Yelp! reviews: people who had a very bad or very good experience are much more likely to post on Yelp! than someone with an average experience. Therefore, it's not likely that the sample of experiences represented on Yelp! are representative of all customer experiences).

In many cases we can use statistical techniques (such as post-stratification weighting) to make a non-representative sample more representative. (This is a common strategy for reputable polling firms.)

In addition, online surveys are particularly unreliable.

Question: How is this relevant to the linked study?

Answer:

The study's methods indicate: "A total of 1190 adults from the United Kingdom participated in the online study in exchange for payment of £1 through Prolific Academic. ... The description forewarned that questions would be asked about non-consensual sexual experiences. ... Age, gender, and sexuality were the only demographic information collected."

If you aren't familiar with Prolific it may not be obvious to you, but the end result is that this recruitment method introduces several problems. (1) Only individuals who are likely to participate in online surveys -- a demographic that likely does not match the whole population -- could possibly be recruited. (2) Of this already limited recruitment sample, individuals self-selected into the survey. If you recall from above, people are much more likely to self-select into a survey when they "have something to say" (i.e., had a very bad experience at a restaurant, have been sexually assaulted). (3) No post-stratification weighting or other statistical techniques for reducing the impact of response bias could be used, because they did not collect any other demographic factors.

The end result here is that this estimate of lifetime victimization is completely unreliable and likely much higher than the true prevalence rate (see part (2) on the above bullet point).

Question: Okay, so why do you trust the rates given in other reports (e.g., reports by the CDC, UN, etc.)?

Answer:

The key lies in the methodology of the study. The bigger (CDC, UN, etc.) reports I've linked to in the past have made efforts to gather representative samples. They usually also use post-stratification methods. Perhaps most importantly, they clearly outline what results may be unreliable based on their data collection and how.

In contrast, the report you've linked fails to acknowledge the deficit in their data collection and instead seems to be suggesting that this new (much higher) rate for male victimization is the accurate one. (They also suggest this high rate is backed by past research by using a single statistic from a review of studies, ignoring the dozens of other much lower statistics from the same review. This is ... misleading at best, actively disingenuous at worst.)

To add on to the above, generally when you're doing research and find an unexpected result, the proper response is to investigate reasons why this might have happened and include this in your discussion. Sometimes, this means you are explaining an improvement on past methodology and why it should generate a more accurate result (and arguing for future replication). Oftentimes, you are instead explaining a deficit in your methodology and why it resulted in such a severe deviance from past results.

Question: Does this mean the linked study is useless?

Answer:

Nope! Even though the population prevalence estimate is arbitrary, it still gives us some interesting and important information. I'll list some below!

(1) Of the men who have been sexually victimized by a woman, more than half of them have been victimized more than once.

(2) Physical force was used less than 5% of the time, suggesting that the methods for victimization employed by female offenders is different than those employed by male offenders.

(3) Sexual victimization among men is statistically associated with anxiety, depression, and PTSD.

(4) Conformity to masculine norms did not alter the psychological impact of sexual victimization.

Clearly the study gives some interesting information about male victims of female sexual offenders, even if it can't give an accurate population prevalence estimate.

Question: So ... what is an accurate prevalence rate for male victimization by women?

Answer:

First, data on this is shockingly difficult to pin down! There are good reasons for this (which I won't get into right now), but here's some better estimates.

The CDC reports lifetime estimates for sexual victimization for the USA (bonus check out the methodology and data assessment reports!). Their most recent lifetime estimate for any "contact sexual violence" (completed or attempted rape, made to penetrate, sexual coercion, unwanted sexual contact) are: 54% for women and 31% for men.

However, these prevalence rates do not take the perpetrator sex into consideration. This is important if we're looking for a prevalence rate for male victimization by women, since not all of the 31% prevalence rate for men was by male perpetrators.

For women, depending on the offense subcategory, victims reported only male perpetrators 90-95% of the time.

For men, depending on the offense subcategory victims reported only female perpetrators 10-72% of the time (notably this means that 28-98% of male victims were victimized by other men compared to the approximate 5-10% of women who were victimized by other women).

One study attempted to reconcile prevalence differences between various studies for the UK, and ended up with the following prevalence ranges: 16-18.5% "less serious" sexual violence for women and 2.5-3.5% "less serious" sexual violence for men; 5-6% attempted/completed rape for women and ~0.5% attempted/completed rape for men.

Finally, this study highlights the variability in prevalence estimates from research articles. The range was very broad and depended on: methods of data collection/sampling, data collection instruments, specific population (i.e., age, country) sampled, specific time range inquired about (i.e., lifetime, since 18, etc.), specific assault types (rape, forced kissing, etc.). (I don't have time to go into each of the articles they analyzed, but this is evident from the overviews they presented!)

I hope this helps you understand this paper (and its limitations!). Hopefully, you can apply this same sort of analysis to other studies.

#feminism #male violence

[inventors-fair]

Castaways: Cast Trigger Commentary

I'm honestly a little surprised at all the cards that we got this week, and I'm overall quite happy with the variety of the cards that I saw and the range of strategies employed. It was hard to choose winners and runners from this mix, and the commentary was quite thought-provoking. Overall, I'd say that with much of these cards, complexity had to be tempered in order to get the most powerful results.

Cast triggers are nuts. The ability to have an uncounterable effect (sort of) that uses the stack can lead to some strange encounters, and there are still some folks learning MTG that have difficulty understanding what it means to "cast" a spell. Lord knows that explaining it to my students can be quite strange, and they're used to things being played just by themselves. When does this happen? How can I respond? What are the best responses? And it's not just about the responses, but how the cards interact on board that shows their design chops. Lots of cards this week made me want to brew, and I love contests like these.

There are quite a few Judge Picks this week. These cards have specific aspects I want to highlight for some reason or other, so pay close attention. With this many contenders of this strength, choosing the top cards was incredibly difficult, as I'm sure you can imagine. Read on!

~

@aethernalstars — Ash-Cannon Goblin

I think my favorite part about this card is the flavor text. It doesn't grok perfectly, but it's playful and enjoyably goblinesque. As far the card idea, the idea is solid enough. What's bugging me is the fact that this is essentially kickerless kicker. The cost is an optional part of casting, and yet the trigger is also part of the casting. There would be no need for this kind of wording unless this started as a kicker idea and was shifted into a cast trigger, which it honestly doesn't need.

As an ETB effect, I would've liked this card a lot better. The cast trigger here isn't doing anything that an ETB couldn't or wouldn't do, if that makes sense. If you want to keep this design, I think that spending your graveyard to smack face/creature/planeswalker is totally fine; honestly, this could be a decent uncommon, because it's a single-use kind of card. Graveyards are great resources and limited resources. For this specific contest, examining the 'why' of cast triggers may have led to other considerations. At it stands, I still like this card and would suggest a couple wording revisions, perhaps. Also make sure that you avoid run-on sentences!

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@brookeuwo — Spitefellows (JUDGE PICK)

You've got a Horizons-y mindset here, don't you? Bet you think you're clever? Well, you are, and I initially was going to be wishy-washy on this card for the name being a reference but that's what a good chunk of Horizons cards are sometimes. And you know what, I'm down for it. The trick is making the homage feel like an homage, and in that I think you succeeded. In terms of power, this card's also got a lot going for it. As much as I worry about the power of cast triggers, this card's got decent power going for it.

Most importantly, it's a blowout that's pretty much only a blowout in limited. It's a five-mana 2/2, which is...very bad comparatively, even if you get two of them. So essentially you're making two bodies, right, but then the evoke cost is where the blowout removal happens; I'd say that nine times out of ten you're just going to clear a board with this card, or at least make an incredible impact. You're clogging MODO with triggers, but I mean, high complexity is fine if it's warranted. I think that as a Lorwyn callback and a Horizons power-level card, this is pushing it but not so much that you'd have problems except at really high-skill levels. Phenomenally fun card and a great idea overall.

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@cthulusaurusrex — Wavebringer (JUDGE PICK)

Attaching the cast trigger inside is an interesting move, and ultimately, I think it works quite well here! The lord-body is one of those ones that can go into any Elemental deck, but the callback to Master of Waves has not gone unnoticed. It's also interesting how you've made it so that this card wants more of a spellslinging deck whereas the Master wanted a permanents-matter deck. Could you run them both? Well, perhaps, if you managed to get them on board and then start slinging like nobody's business. What I'd want to do is play this card with Quasiduplicate effects and then really get things going.

What I'm trying to say in the end is that this kind of card is the kind that makes me want to play it and makes me understand why it exists. I don't know if it's necessarily breaking new ground, being a callback, but it's doing a number of things differently, and I think that if absolutely nothing else that this card is overwhelmingly good. The chops are there and the rationale is there and the play style—you guessed it, it's there. If I have any reservations, I suppose I'd like an inch of flavor text, but even then, is that necessary? Arguably, doesn't have to be there; the AD makes it pretty clear what the coming storm would be. So maybe all that good stuff is worth commending on its own, you know?

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@curiooftheheart — Bellowing Boars (JUDGE PICK)

I really want to like this card's power level, because it's actually quite striking. A late-game ramp deck that can get eight or even twelve lands can absolutely run away with this card. On turn four, getting two 3/2s with trample and haste isn't anything to shake a stick at, and the ability on turn eight to get three of those AND have four mana left over, potentially, is fascinating. It makes one focused on the late-game potential of stompy decks, and that's pretty darn cool overall. The more I think about this card, the more I find the design tech actually really great for limited.

And I mean, I have to assume that all that thought went into this when you designed this card, because it's actually completely unique as far as I can tell from a cursory search. The only real grumbling I have is in the overwrought flavor text. Paring that down to maybe two lines would've suited the rest of this card's strengths well. Does it have a specific setting, something that Vivien observes that's fascinating for her? A lot of adjectives hamper down the writing here and I do wish I could be less of an expletive—but it's honestly really distracting. Look: this is ultimately a card design contest wherein presentation matters. This card is substantially well-made for the nature of this contest and everything else is a me problem. Where is this going? I swear I had a point what wasn't a half-assed pseudo-apology. Ah well. Damn boars, running through my consciousness.

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@dabudder — Gracie, Substitute Teacher

This is definitely a commander-oriented card. I'm looking at its applications, and honestly, I'm not sure I'm convinced I see the upside? Drawing into cards would be nice, but the benefit of casting one spell into another feels a bit wonky. That said, there are mechanics like Escape that make the benefits fun, and with prowess you've got a bit of a nice beater sometimes. What's the shell that really wants this card, though? I can imagine that you could have fun with Suspend cards... Ooh, actually, imagine: turn 2-3, plot a couple cards, then turn 4 play Gracie and cast some stuff from exile. Trigger, cast Ancestral Vision/Profane Tutor, etc.

So it's not that I don't see the combo appeal! I think this card isn't a card for me specifically. Getting cards back from wherever you're casting them can be fun—command zone as well, considering you can get your commander to hand fairly easily. In limited, I think building around this card would be weird, and explaining that the initial spell getting cast wouldn't resolve is also weird, but hey, it's what it is. I feel that this card has strong "fun" application. Practically, this is a card for someone who's not me, in a format that's probably not a premier set. But who knows? As a side note, I think you also captured a lighthearted Strixhaven feel quite well. I substitute myself and lemme tell you, it's not half as magical...

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@feyd-rautha-apologist — Demon of Final Moments

As a small note, I recommend in your art direction that you have the focus on the demon, because I totally was digging the focus on the mage until I actually saw what the card was. That said, damn effective work there. As for the card, you are looking at some weird weird weird stuff here. By "weird" I mean that this card is a combo piece whereupon you cast it and win the game. how so? Let us count the heckin' ways. Thassa's Oracle is the most obvious one, but Laboratory Maniac plus any draw effect is there, as is an Inexorable Tide with exiling extra turn effects like Karn's Temporal Sundering and the lot. Cast this spell and you win—there really isn't any other reason to play this card.

In limited, I wouldn't imagine that this card does much good if the removal in the set is worth its salt. Play it and bam, it's removed, you lose instantly. There are so many ways that you lose with this card, especially if it gets countered; it's fragile as all get-out. A design that either wins instantly or makes you lose just as fast is... Well, not exactly what I'd call good gameplay, I'll say that much. Additionally, if you cheat this card out, you have the situation where you can just play the game normally and encounter loops with said extra turn shenanigans (assuming proliferation of time counters). I'm afraid this one goes into the "busted" pile. Side note: I feel that the flavor text could have been one sentence with "his last" coming after a colon, but I'm down with the concept.

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@fractured-infinity — Curse's End

Reading up on what the Curse of Wandering was/is on Amonkhet, I'm uncertain that this card is vibing with that flavor. The Curse is an aspect of the plane, and so is this card saying that the whole shebang is now over? What had caused it in the first place? If it predated Bolas, what's going on with the mystery? I feel that this card is saying that the Curse is an actual curse with a source and a way to end it, which... Eh, I don't feel the meshing, but regardless. the card itself is a great mythic with only a couple minor issues.

Firstly, there's the question of how this card would function if this contest didn't have a cast trigger. I would imagine that instead of a cast trigger, the better design would just be to exile all creatures and all creature cards from graveyards. While this does have the benefit of putting a bunch of ETB triggers on the stack, there are better ways to go about the exact execution. Besides, why not have a deck that uses this cast trigger then counters the actual spell itself? That kind of defeats the purpose of the card, I think, a little cheatsy-shenanigans that feels like a workaround rather than a function of the card itself. Maybe if there was an additional cost or caveat, I would buy it, but I'm not convinced at this iteration.

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@greensunzenith — Swarm Vanguard

The short answer is that this card is funny, funky, and probably not that broken. As for whether or not it's common, that's a rough one. Cast triggers at common are...odd, too. The best one I can see is, oddly enough, Supernatural Rescue (as a rarity-to-complexity comparison). I think this should probably be an uncommon, because copies of permanent spells becoming tokens doesn't exactly grok as well as we'd think, especially when you consider that you're going to have many, MANY copies of this card in your deck. After a point, how easy/hard would it be to keep track of on paper? Probably easy if you used things that didn't resemble actual copies of the Vanguard, but whatever. At least it's a vanilla creature.

When you have an effect like this, one must ask: would this have been more easily grokable as an ETB trigger? Honestly, I think the answer is yes, and it's unfortunate with a design that tries to go for this amount of elegance at common. Entering and making an insect token for each card with the name Swarm Vanguard in your graveyard would've probably been fine and scalable without the casting complexity. Flavor's nice, though, and the concept is solid.

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@i-am-the-one-who-wololoes — Zarderek, the Folkslinger

I am willing to meet you halfway on some of this. Having a spellslinging GW commander isn't exactly on-flavor, but they've had Magecraft across colors before. Technically, I don't think there's anything out-of-pie that excludes it. But you have to roll with me and agree that it feels a little off to have GW be the one for Magecrafting without naming it? You know what, I'll insert an honorary piece of trinket text in front of that trigger just for my own peace of mind.

As it stands the card would play pretty normally and would make limited decks pretty nasty. Having a protective backup spell to get more bodies and get more counters would allow for Zarderek to run away with games quite easily but not without too much power by itself. I think that it does just what the colors want to do and, without feeling too weird, is a reasonable card. I don't think you could've made it any other way; RW would've been the next-best choice, I believe. Perhaps the flavor could've spoken to the world on which we see this character, something about why GW has this kind of magical expansion? Looking pretty generic for the moment, captain.

~

@khyrberos — Atraxa's Command

This card probably functions exactly how it's intended to function. I think the possibility of having a card where the modes function in this manner is pretty cool and, depending on the life paid, would make for an interesting setup. It's reasonable to assume that swinging in would get you all that life back, too, but regardless: this card doesn't really function as a command, or at least not in the way that commands are meant to function. This card is essentially a one-off that feels like a one-off, a function of itself that has no bearing on the rest of a set. What environment would be able to play this card, or want to? What limited environment could spawn it? Honestly, what preconstructed environment would have it, either?

Commands function on their versatility, and this card has none—which is fine if it wasn't technically a command, kind of? Even then, it doesn't have the "command" feel, and turning all your creatures into Atraxa for free is... I'm not gonna say that it's not fun in concept, but for lack of a better term, this card feels like it was designed for itself without a greater reach in mind. Even a five-color command with an Obelisk of Alara feel could've done the job as a "Praetor's Command" with different modes. That said, playing with Phyrexian mana is playing with fire as-is.

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@misterstingyjack — Facesnatcher Ghoul (JUDGE PICK)

I think this card is doing everything it needs to do, and it's doing it quite well. Exiling and/or returning creatures will turn it on, and those are the most common ways to interact with creatures in graveyards at lower rarities. I love the notion that you can drop an Emrakul and then instant-speed exile it to turn the Ghoul on, but that's not happening in limited; most likely, you'll have a couple moments where you'll cast return spells and you'll be doing just fine. This card is for sure a constructed card.

And again, constructed cards are fine, because we need cards of every rarity to make things work! When I look at submissions, the first thing I think is what would happen if I opened this out of a booster pack while drafting, or something to that effect. ... Maybe it's not the first thing, but it's one of the things I think about for sure. And this card would be quite fun to build around if you can make it work, but more likely than not it's going to be a pet card, and that's perfectly fine. Targeting cards in graveyards with spells is one of those very specific things that you can't repeat much. Honestly I think "cast a spell or activate an ability" would be better for gameplay. Did you think about that and relegate it to casting because of the contest? If so, I get it, and if not, I honestly think that that would've been acceptable, just because the card itself is so tightly designed.

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@nine-effing-hells — Panoptic Predator (JUDGE PICK)

Was this an intentional callback to Hydroid Krasis? I mean, I can imagine so, because it's got similar-ish casting capabilities, but the bodies that it can make are really nasty. I think getting a bunch of fliers can be extremely rough for limited, but it is a mythic, and getting bodies isn't the worst thing in the world. Drawing cards as well is a nasty little thing. The whole notion of perfection and eyes feels like it fits well, and ultimately the question of whether the cast trigger is necessary is pretty reasonable, because, well, it wouldn't be very strong otherwise. Five mana for, say, two 1/1 fliers and a 3/3 on the ground? Yeah, mythic-worthy, and upping that cost if pretty strong itself!

What I like about this card is the fact that it doesn't get continuously stronger. Once you cast it, that's it. There's no flickering shenanigans, there's no proliferation or +1/+1 synergy—what you see is what you get. The self-balancing aspect means that the really horrible part of going against this card is the draw power that you get after being pinged in the air a lot. But, they are only 1/1s, and those little eyes squish pretty easily. Honestly, I thought that this thing itself had flying, and the fact that it doesn't makes me feel better. Overall I'm a fan! We need more eyes in the world. The flavor of Phyrexia being gross and all-encompassing checks out too.

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@real-aspen-hours — Tachyon Blast (JUDGE PICK)

This is a weird little idea and I have to commend it for how strange the interactions must be. I think that it has to be appropriately costed with that cast trigger, because the uncounterable Shock ain't worth nothing. What a strange little card! I feel that, in a limited game, this would be a pretty worthwhile removal spell, but the cost is somewhat prohibitive. Comparing it to cards like Trick Shot, I feel that this could've been a four-mana Instant spell that did double Shocks instead.

Well, even then, "double Shock" is a bit of a misnomer. Triggering and then shocking is pretty strange; targets being chosen on cast plus a trigger that also targets would mean that there would be a lot of rough interactions when it came to protecting and hexproof-ing. But hell, now you can take out that two-toughness Goyf without worrying about too much, right? There's a lot of thought that went into making this spell as simple as possible, and I appreciate that. The flavor is pretty neat as well, and checks out with how the Izzet work. Honestly, the flavor feels so on-point that it's almost hard to comment on, and that's a good thing. You've blended it in to the world quite well.

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@reaperfromtheabyss — Phyrexian Glutton (JUDGE PICK)

How much consideration was given to Phyrexian Ingester when it came to this card? That said, I actually see where you wanted to make this one distinguished. I feel that you should have actually blended the first and second abilities into one paragraph. Looking into similar effects, I think someone's first notion would've been to have this be an "As ~ enters the battlefield" effect, and yet, I can see why that would've been the wrong choice with flicker effects. Man, this is a tricky one! You mitigated a lot of the ways in which this card could've been broken. One other thing I like about it is that it's not an optional ability, so you'd have to exile one of your own creatures and/or planeswalkers if there were no other options.

As a control card, or even a midrange anti-control card, I like it a lot. The way that it's both a removal spell and a finisher is pretty strong without being overwhelmingly annoying. It enters without the ability to Shock it, which is nasty as well. And yet, on-board, it's not the hardest to chump. It sure as hell ain't the easiest, but it's designed to be difficult without being impossible to deal with. Certainly a contender, and I'm a fan! What's with folks and designing Phyrexians this week? I'm not complaining, but hey, it's something curious to note.

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@ship-of-skitties — Machi Avel, Master Planner

When we have references in real life, I think Magic's rule of thumb is to have a pseudonym of some kind instead of... Well, "parody" is the best name for it, but this card feels like an homage way more than that. I'm not the biggest fan of the name, but you have the plot and you've not lost it, that's for sure! This card's a strange one but you have all the pieces. Plotting plus the trigger is obvious but you can also cast cards with impulse draws and t works like the Aftermath Pia Nalaar, which checks out! I love the "this turn" on the middle ability; I originally felt that you could've put the two together, but actually, the third ability works with cards that just have plot naturally, so I get why you separated them.

Man, ultimately this card is just a crazy engine, and I respect it. Plotting forces a long game when you consider that you can't plot and cast cards in the same turn. I want to point out that the flavor text is a little squished in there and that "nonland" is one word, but besides those two things and the name, you've made a pretty gnarly card and I respect it immensely. Plotting has proven to be really fun for gameplay and this card's doing it quite well. Yeah, little to no notes otherwise! Good job.

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@sombramainexe — The First Stone

Don't forget that when you submit a card via text or via an editor that doesn't have a specific rarity indicator, you need to note a card's rarity. I wouldn't worry about that for the moment, though, because we should talk about this card first. I know where the name is coming from, and yes, the concept of casting the first stone and all that is theoretically funny. Functionally, this card's pretty middling, because in an interactive game you can have only one that you'll maybe use assuming you've not interacted beforehand, or it will literally be a dead draw. A single removal spell that only works if you haven't performed a set-specific game action just isn't the kind of card that stands up to scrutiny.

That's not to say that we don't appreciate seeing funny cards here from time to time, and I do assume that to some degree this card was supposed to be humorous. (BTW, for everyone else reading that doesn't understand the joke, it's based off John 8:7, a Biblical reference that's entered the common lexicon). With that said a degree of functionality is still preferred to go along with it. This card is probably narrower than you might think at first glance.

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@stupidstupidratcreatures — Biogenesis

There are quite a few options on this card. I think that the fact that you have to choose between counters and life is pretty bunk, and I actually thought before rereading that you would get both counters and life. If the second part of the card was "You gain 1 life and draw a card. Put a +1/+1 counter on up to one target creature you control." would've been just fine to me. There are plenty of effects like this in green and there's no shame in pushing it just a little bit.

Is this a cast trigger, though? I suppose in a roundabout way it is, so I'll let it skirt the contest a little bit, but this is very technically a trigger on the sacrifice rather than the actual cast. At the same time, it's important to make that distinction because it shows the complexity of a card's internals. The trigger wouldn't be possible without the cast, so there's all that, but no matter, the card's perfectly reasonable as is. I think the generic name/implied flavor isn't pushing me into any particular direction, but I'll commend this card regardless for being more in the realm of Plumb the Forbidden rather than the other green cards in the Greater Good variety that we see riffs on.

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@tanknspank — Kami of Impending Victory (JUDGE PICK)

So this would trigger off itself, right? Six power for six mana is a good start. I like the idea that you can ramp up to a couple more bodies just by itself, and a six-mana 4/4 in white is still pretty good. I know in your notes you mentioned storm and stormlike capabilities, and honestly, I wouldn't worry about that. The ability to look at other cast spells and to make something based on those spells is reasonable for the trigger without being too powerful. What's there to say otherwise? I dunno, this card feels just plain great in limited and decent-ish in commander; bodies are bodies, no matter the format.

Victory, well—that's an odd one, but I suppose the flavor is justified if something terrible happens, and lemme just check the wiki real quick... Oh wow. I actually had no idea that that happened in the story. WELL then. I guess that places the timeline now, doesn't it. Yeah, this card checks out on all fronts. White doesn't usually get the storm capabilities, but ramping up to a multi-spell turn would be pretty fun, and even then you get to play some fun tide-turning power on turn six regardless. Overall, it's solid! It's not breaking any new ground but it's doing all the work that it wants to do fairly and firmly. I do like the fact that it'll get you a Samurai even if it gets countered. Feels important for some reason.

~

Whew. Well, that's all set and settled. Thank you for all your entries, and see y'all next week. @abelzumi

#mtg #magic the gathering #custom magic card #inventor's fair #commentary #cast trigger contest

[myimaginarywonderland]

F1 is killing itself. It started years ago and it has continued on ever since.

How you might ask? Well for starters let's talk about broadcasting. I can only speak for my country (Germany) but F1 has been taken off any market and made an exclusive Sky sports product. Which is terrible considering it was basically never before behind a pay wall and the TV commentator team had been there for such a long time that even my parents/grandparents knew about them. When you have such a well established commentary team and then not only take that away but also basically put F1 behind a paywall, you are going to lose viewers.

Then, F1 marketing has someone been some of the worst it has been in years. In theory when you have something like DTS it should be an opportunity, a chance to show some of the behind the scenes. Instead, what you get when you watch it is made up drama, fake rivalries etc. Yes it might attract viewers but it gives a compleltly wrong picture of the sport and almost all of the drivers.

Adding onto that, there's the Vegas GP. I think everyone knows that Monaco is prestigious, the F1 track that is probably most considered flashy but F1 is trying to do that with the Vegas GP. Why? No one knows. Also no one cares. The reason why most people are excited wasn't even the race, it was because a driver who currently isn't even driving wanted to have a race there. Fans do not look forward to racing there, instead the most anticipated thing is the stories that might happen outside of all racing. That tells you everything you need to know about that GP. Yeah, they want to attract viewers with it and visitors and oh, what was that? No one in their normal life could afford those tickets. Yeah, that's what I thought. Going to F1 GPs has become so expensive that many people can't even afford it and adding even more expensive venues to that is not going to help in any way.

While we are already talking about GPs, how about we acknowledge the fact that having the current season is absolutely insane? Not only are there's weird small gaps between races not enough to give drivers a rest, we also are harming the mechanics life more and more by basically not allowing them to see their family or be able to take a break. Not to mention how insane the spread out of races is to make them even more inaccessible and environmentally damaging.

While are already talking about tracks, maybe it's time to acknowledge that this calendar is for the most part boring? Sure there are some good tracks but by removing so many beloved tracks that have brought actual great racing, F1 is further digging itself a deeper hole. And also, don't call yourself a world championship when we still have no races in Africa. (I will mourn this until it changes especially now having seen with Formula E how well the Cape Town race was visitied.)

We could also talk about other things like how a crash that could have killed a driver should not be nominated for any award or how Abu Dhabi was a fundamental moment that marked the sport priorizing spectacle over safety but that's just going to make this post longer and longer.

So, let's talk about why we removing free practice is one of the worst ideas possible and for me personally will lead to a point where F1 can't return from.

Free practice might not be watched by many fans because it is on a Friday, a workday. And depending on where the timezones are going to complicate that further which is totally alright. Free practice doesn't need to be watched by everyone. It however for fans gives them an opportunity to get familiar with the track or in some cases is even maybe the only way a fan might come to a race considering the tickets for Friday are the cheapest. It offers new fans an opportunity to have a look at the track layout and not be thrown in complelty without any knowledge. Furthermore it's an opportunity to learn for maybe more strategic fans how possible strategies might look like, what things might be taken advantage of etc.

But that's not even what it is about. Free practice first and foremost is for the drivers and engineers. It gives drivers time to test out different setups, offers engineers to opportunity to test race strategies, is a chance to see how much conditions have changed etc. It is important for the safety of the paddock as it gives drivers to opportunity to get familiar again with the track and test limits before actually having to race. It helps to get out of the vast majority of unknown conditions and get into a territory where drivers feel comfortable with the track and the car. It is crucial to the safety first and foremost.

Getting ride of free practice would not only be a huge lose for fans but it would also mark the final point of no return where drivers safety truly stops being a concern.

Getting ride of free practice would be the final nail in the coffin and would be another reason we can later out to a list of all the things that probably led to a fatal accident.

F1 claims to know things aren't what the fans what and yet I have not once seen them even approach fans to ask for their opinion. Instead of gaining fans with their actions F1 is actively pushing them away.

#f1