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dailyexo · 1 year

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[INTERVIEW] Baekhyun - 230223 W Korea: “Days With Baekhyun”

Returning after two years, Baekhyun used the word “comfort” often.

Baekhyun’s only wish is to sing heart-felt, timeless songs for us. Baekhyun talked about the days spent with us and the days ahead of us.

How many days has it been since you were discharged from the military?

Today is precisely the third day since I’ve been out.

You have finally gifted flower shoes to the fans. (‘Giving flower shoes’ is a Korean phrase that means returning to the significant other who had been waiting for their partner to return from military service.)

I know. Before I left for the military, I told the fans that many things could change in a year and nine months. How could I make them wait? I told them to focus on their own lives but come back if they feel like it when I return. I said, if anything, I would try to win them back again.

So, you recently did a live show to celebrate discharge. Seeing you’re still as bright and youthful, fans recalled the time you promoted your second solo mini-album, “Delight,” released three years ago.

Honestly, I was super worried. But I was relieved to see their warm reactions. I’m grateful to my parents. Haha.

You talked about your time in the army during the live show.

Most of my training campmates were born after 1999, except for a few. I was the eldest there. Everyone followed me like their older brother. I still keep in touch with the friends I met then. Recently, I got a call from one of them. He said, “I am working out at the gym right now.” He was a skinny one, and every single day at the training camp, I told him to work out.

Baekhyun, as we know, was the life of the party among the EXO and SuperM members. Your bubbly personality would have shined in the army training camp.

There was no exception. I didn’t let anyone fall behind. Whenever I saw someone wanting to give up, I said, “You can’t lose to things like this,” “If you keep giving up, this becomes your habit,” and, “Real life outside is much harder than this.” I don’t let my friends give up or fall behind. I pull them together.

I presume the past two years have been a time to realize and reassess who Byun Baek Hyun really is as a person, not just Beakhyun from EXO.

Yeah. My MBTI changed during the break from ISFP to ESTJ. I’ve been known as a homebody for a long time among my friends. But I’m actually an extrovert and a very active person. But when I look back on my childhood, I barely had time to spend at home. To the point where my mother always said, “How come I see my son only for breakfast?” I felt like I went back to my real self during the break.

Was it also a time to realize again what your fans mean to you?

Of course. I still have a long way to go to learn about the fans thoroughly. There’s something I learned this time, though. The fact that our existence to each other is a lot bigger than what we think. During the first year of my alternative military service, I looked back a lot. I watched a lot of the past concert videos. At concerts, I had a lot of fun with them. There were times when I saw my facial expression on the stage and thought I really did bust my butt to pull everything. Also, sometimes I felt really empty and felt this unfillable void. At one point, I thought, “Will they still be there?” while listening to the cheers of fans in those videos. They are like a really good teacher who would grade me and encourage me. They inspire me to do my homework. They have had me run, take lessons and become a better person. I want to do well to hear their acknowledgment. If they didn’t exist, I probably would not have tried so hard to come this far.

Your Namu-wiki page has a “Fan Love” section. As we read through the things you’ve said to the fans, we thought even a real boyfriend couldn’t say such sweet things.

Haha. Definitely my mom’s influence there. She speaks so gently. She is the sweetest person, really. And I am the youngest in the family. My family poured sweet love on me. Sometimes, fans ask me how I can speak so nicely. To be honest, I don’t know. I feel it’s nothing special, to me, a very ordinary and everyday thing.

It seems like fans could rarely feel the army break. You filmed 20 pieces of YouTube content ahead of time and released them during the break.

I know how hard it is to wait. Even when we did the EXO concert tour, we couldn’t release an album during that time. So it had been a long-standing concern about how to fill the vacancy. In particular, no one was trying to do something special to fill the vacancy during the military break. At first, I thought about making a small game instead of a video. Like the Tamagotchi game, fans can foster ‘Baekhyun’ from level 1 for 641 days while I am away. Feed him, water him. Haha.

The background in planning the pre-created YouTube Content was to give fans something to calm their longings, but also in some parts, wishing your fans would not forget you by watching these videos, right?

Yeah, that is pretty much it. Actually, I was swamped when we were filming the YouTube videos. I had a hectic schedule. It was just around when my third solo mini album Bambi came out, and on top of that, SuperM’s promotion overlapped. But after filming them, I felt so indescribably proud.

The 2021 album Bambi leaves much to be desired in some ways because it had no official activities due to your military service. Nonetheless, it recorded high sales, enough to bring the double million-seller title. It was also the album released in the year of your 30th birthday, showcasing your finest skills as a vocalist.

Bambi was created strictly with my own needs and vision. I tried everything I wanted to do without looking at anyone, and I wanted to free my mind by doing so. You are right. I put in everything I could as a vocalist. I first rearranged my vocal tone around the time of my first solo mini-album City Lights in 2019, and I wanted to see how much I had grown since then. I became very dedicated because I thought I could make a better sound than two years ago. I tried the vocal ranges that I wouldn’t have chosen in the past because I was too nervous. I purposely chose difficult music because I wanted to experience both failures and trials.

In particular, the title song "Bambi" seems to have been a regular song for the music school entrance exam that year. It’s perfect for showing off your vocal skills going back and forth freely with your falsetto, modal, and head voice.

Well, I don’t really recommend it. It’s a high-risk song, the beat and rhythm are tough. It’s a pretty challenging song to sing well.

With the release of Bambi, Baekhyun’s genre and brand have become more apparent. "Baekhyun" reminds us of groovy R&B beats from "UN Village" in the album City Lights and "Candy" in Delight.

R&B is a genre that I’ve been attached to for a long time, so I’ll continue with it. However, I also want new challenges. I want to try this and that without being too picky. I want to be an all-rounder. I’m interested in singing-rap these days.

Which musician are you paying attention to as a reference these days?

I’ve gotten closer to Colde recently. I like his singing style, and it’s fabulous that he pulls off the melody rhythmically as if he’s rapping. I’ve requested songs from Colde. I don’t know what kind of work will come out yet, but we’ll work together soon.

As a musician, there’s no more valuable experience than getting a “response” to your song. All three solo albums released so far have recorded respectable sales. Did you expect such success?

Not at all. It exceeded my expectations. This record was possible thanks to the efforts of many K-pop singers ahead of me. In particular, the sales volume of the second album was the highest in 20 years of Korean pop music history.

Delight became the first solo album to achieve the million-seller title, and you became the second artist to hold such titles for both the group and solo albums, following after Seo Tai-ji.

Yes, but it’s all thanks to the dedication of so many Korean musicians. As K-pop became more known worldwide, more people started paying attention to K-culture. The Korean artists before me had already paved the roads and I just got to piggyback on them.

I don’t feel any guilt when I listen to your music. Maybe it’s a complete anachronism, but there’s still a certain prejudice regarding idol music. Similarly, some idol music is referred to as a ‘hidden masterpiece.’ But when I listen to Baekhyun’s solo music, I feel like I’m just listening to really good music.

Thanks. I indeed paid a lot of attention to that. I chose a lot of genres that wouldn’t come from SM. SM prefers strong and intense sounds, but I wanted to focus on easy-listening music. It was partly because of my preference and strategic choice to differentiate between EXO and solo activities. Seeing that many of the tracks from my solo albums are still receiving a ot of love, I think it was a good decision.

It is common to spot excessiveness in solo albums by Idol group members. It was rather unique that Baekhyun has an easy mood, as you’ve just said.

I pushed for that. I kept thinking, ‘I’ll make more easy-listening music,’ ‘The music should not change in the middle,’ and ‘The melody should flow as expected.’ I wanted to minimize statement sounds and focus on the lyrics. There was even some feedback from the company that it fell short. But I kept pushing. My motto was to do something that sounds easy to people’s ears, like passive music, even if it may not feel ‘sophisticated or innovative’ for some.

What you just said seems connected to the question of, ‘what is good music to me as a musician?’

Probably. In a way, I’m making music that’s pleasant to listen to. But I don’t usually listen to a lot of music. My ears are so tired. Since I’m a singer, I need to know a lot of songs, but when I find one I like, I listen to it over and over. There’s something in common when I look at the songs I’m hooked on. It’s not too much, and it just has one or two significant factors.

For example?

I especially like old-fashioned pop songs. Fibo Bryson’s "Why Goodbye" is also a song that I love, for example. If you listen to it, there’s a particular section once in the bridge, once in the chorus, and once in the verse. You can listen to it comfortably, and the sound is completely filled with only vocals.

What is the vocal tone you pursue?

If I could have a voice that doesn’t go out of date, I couldn’t ask for more.

It’s also the most challenging thing.

I know. I once imagined, “Will Baekhyun’s episode of ‘Hidden Singer’ come out?” I don’t think so. Because my voice doesn’t have a distinctive feature. But it’s definitely a voice that can give you some comfort. A good tone depends on the time and taste. It’s something that keeps moving without being fixed. So I just want my voice to be peaceful and stable. I hope I can make the sound warm enough to relax your body. That’s all I want.

It’s been 11 years since your debut, and you’re still taking vocal lessons every week, right?

Yes. I have a big desire to evolve. I thought about it when EXO received a lot of attention with Growl in 2013. ‘Why are so many people going crazy? Am I really that good? I don’t think so. If the heat goes away, they will see me.’ That’s why I kept trying. I always criticize myself more than others do. It’s not a matter of high self-esteem and low self-esteem. I’m just continuing to make up for my shortcomings because I know my weaknesses better than anyone else.

To me, Baekhyun is not a person with low self-esteem but one who constantly and carefully self-censors himself.

Yes, that’s right. Maybe I am a perfectionist, and I hate it when there’s no complete ending. If I don’t think I can finish something properly, I don’t even start. I tend to get extremely disappointed with myself if I don’t do something perfectly at work.

A perfectionist who pursues easiness… It sounds hard. Haha

Haha. As a musician, I want to be an easy person who can blend in with the public. I don’t want to be a musician who is so cool that people admire and want to follow. I want to be someone people can talk to easily when they meet me on the street while listening to my song.

The only regret for Baekhyun as a solo musician is that he had little opportunity to tell autobiographical stories in music. What kind of stories do you want to tell through your music as 32-year-old Baekhyun?

I want to deliver encouraging lyrics. And deliver the message that you shouldn’t give up easily and try to face more challenges. I think the disappearance of the “Jeong” culture played a role in making people get easily tired these days. In the past, when a neighbor moved in, we used to make steamed rice cakes. If the next door neighbor cooks a lot of food, they would share it with others. But living in a disconnected world without affection, people seem to think only of themselves. I want to put a hopeful message in my song that we can all unite in harmony again.

It’s been two years since W Magazine and Baekhyun met—, since the cover of the March 2021 issue, right? Throughout today’s shoot, the staff said you were sexy. Baekhyun’s “soft sexiness” that you’ve shown in your solo career seems to be reflected in today’s shoot.

Sexy… Haha. I don’t think the sexiness that I have is the sexiness that’s full of intense emotions. It’s more like this. Sometimes you play with your friends, and you feel unexpectedly sexy. I think I have the sexiness to make people a little curious about me. Haha

Today’s shoot was with Cartier’s Tank Frances Watch and Icon Collection. These are pieces that have been called Wannabe by many artists for their timeless classic aesthetic. Regardless of timea and nationality, who is the greatest artist for Baekhyun?

Michael Jackson! Michael Jackson was the only artist who stood still on stage for a few seconds or minutes and people couldn’t stop cheering. His songs have made many people cry for a long time, giving them joy and happiness. So just seeing him standing still on the stage makes them tear up. There isn’t an artist who can beat Michael Jackson.

Still, what would be your secret weapon that you could win over Michael Jackson?

Hmm… My gentle way of talking? Haha.

EXO recently announced the news of EXO’s 11th-anniversary fan meeting. What would it look like if you were to compare EXO to family?

Children who were raised by a strict father but had an infinitely sweet mother? Maybe the stage is our dad. We work hard on stage until it feels like our bodies would break literally. But when we get off stage, we act like kids. Not one friend is rude, and everyone is so kind. When we talk to each other, there’s no difference from when we debuted 11 years ago or when we were trainees.

What are the three things Baekhyun is focusing on these days?

I’m into golf. Out on the golf field, my arms got so tanned, dark enough to leave a watch mark on my wrist. I feel very relieved when I go rounding and see the open space. The second one is the direction of the vocals. And for the third, I was going to say exercise but I’m going to change that. (Kim) Jong-kook, whom I became close with through workouts, said, “It’s time for you to focus on your back.” But hip workouts are too hard. Haha. The last one is EXO’s comeback. We will return as soon as possible with a high-quality album this year.

Photo links: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23

Credit: W Korea.

#EXO #EXO K #Baekhyun #230223 #exo im #exo k im #baekhyun im #magazine #magazine:w korea #p:news #t:news #fs:w korea #comeback:Fight

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gacha-incels · 2 months

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Do you think that there is a possibility of Hypergryph splitting from Yostar for global publishing of Arknights and moving it to Gryphline instead? The traditional Chinese server got moved from Long Chen to Gryphline recently, and the new ambience synesthesia concert merch is on the Gryphline store rather than yostar’s. It may just be wishful thinking as yostar and hypergryph both own large shares of each other, but if there is a planned split from yostar would it potentially be a reason why Hypergryph hasn’t made a statement condemning Yostar Korea’s actions? Is there any precedent for publisher changes for a sort of legal clause preventing them from hurting each others’ image prior to the split being announced?

Gryphline is situated in Singapore, having what I guess you could call a “proxy” company for global business in Singapore is something a lot of companies in China have done for a while, increasingly within the past couple of years, for a multitude of reasons. Last time I checked Mihoyo had “Cognosphere” in Singapore, and when you buy gachabux in that game on servers outside China I believe your bill is from Cognosphere. The slave labor fast fashion site Shein has been operating under the Singapore-registered “Roadget Business” which some have speculated makes it easier to list in the USA. Yostar has HQ in Hong Kong which used to be the proxy location but according to this FT article-“Traditionally, Hong Kong was the choice for many such companies, said Kia Meng Loh, a senior partner at Dentons Rodyk. But with Beijing “flexing its muscles” in the semi-autonomous rival finance hub, Singapore is the obvious next choice, he said.” Hypergryph has multiple games coming out in the near future, I believe a regular (non-gacha) 3D anime mobile game and a 3D Arknights spinoff that will have a weapon gacha, and I think another game that’s TBD? They could be rearranging their internal structure due to this expansion if they’ve switched around their Chinese server already, but I’m unsure if this means they will completely split with Yostar who I believe publishes the US, Japanese and Korean servers.

Admittedly I can’t say I’m super well versed with this type of business and therefore it’s harder to really predict what they will do in the future, but I’ve been watching the situation since AK KR posted that notice to see what happens. I don’t have anything against the game itself, if it comes out that somehow their hands are completely tied in the situation or something I’ll post about that as well but I’m not holding my breath. In terms of my read on the situation, I think a huge message has ready been sent to the fans as to whom the company deems most profitable to listen to, regardless of any future handwringing over the situation. I would think between a woman posting extremely basic feminist thoughts on her personal twitter (equal pay etc) and enjoying the woman’s day google doodle years ago, and the Arknights KR/Yostar employee liking extremely violent fanart on the official twitter account and hanging out on extremist, misogynistic chat boards, that the employee would be seen as more of a problem and should have been the one disciplined. In reality, not only was the woman punished by having her work deleted but the official KR account posted that diatribe calling basic feminism a “dividing force” or whatever. This action and the following statement are absolutely not neutral, especially during a time a which violent misogyny has been increasingly ripping through South Korea as a whole but also gacha games specifically. In terms of PR I do think this is something Hypergryph could address, if HG doesn’t want to rock the boat with Yostar so to speak because of some upcoming split, it seems Yostar has already rocked the boat quite a bit with this action to begin with…

in terms of a main developer punishing the publisher, one example I can think of is Fate/Grand Order’s DelightWorks (after the sakura wars fuckup FGO is developed by “Lasengle” now, but when this happened it was DW) changing an in-game reward that FGO’s Korean publisher Netmarble gave out. In terms of them splitting as well, I’m still looking into it 👍 If anyone knows anything else feel free to reply or send me stuff and I’ll post it, sometimes I feel if I wait too long to reply to messages it comes across as rude lol so I’m not getting lost in like thesis tier research

#Arknights #yostar #hypergryph #feminist ideological verification

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choliosus · 1 month

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Happy one year to the QSMP!!!!

There’s a lot going on with the server right now that is being sorted out, but I just want to share my appreciation for every part of this project.

This server means so much to me. I used to watch DSMP and it will always hold a special place in my heart, but as anything does, it ended. It was already dwindling out but I think the thing that really did it was technoblade passing. And I’m gonna be honest I’m still not over that. I watched him more than any other creator, he means so much to me. The time in between his death and the start of the qsmp was especially sad. I was just missing a lot. Him, the server he played on, that community, etc.

I wanted to engage with the content from the people that he played with, but it was hard. Every update about him, such as technodad streaming, dream making the song about him, was a lot emotionally.

Also not to mention I was sooo hyperfixating on both him and the dream smp as a whole. So it left a big void in my life. I wanted to be wholeheartedly invested in something again.

Around the beginning of 2023, I started watching old Quackity vods and that became my new comfort thing. Just the silly ones where he was watching soap operas and stuff.

Then not so long after I had started doing that, he announced the QSMP. I cannot describe to you my excitement. That week or so before it started I was just so excited. And before that lmaoooo I was not thriving. School was crazy busy, I cut my own bangs and it looked terrible, and that pretty much exemplifies where I was at.

I remember switching to slimecicle’s perspective at some point during the first stream and I followed him, fit, roier, and Mariana as they went mining and were very silly. I smiled the whole time. And then, I watched more the next day, and the next day.

I had forgotten what it felt like to be a part of something that was actively taking place. It had been a while since that was how the dream smp was. I would go weeks or months without any updates, and I would just be by myself reading fanfics.

It felt really fucking good to be able to enjoy something new. Not to replace what I had before, but to start a new adventure. That’s what it feels like to me.

There was a lot to keep up with at first and luckily I had social media to sum things up for me.

Fast forward and the Brazilian members join, then the French. Each time I was a little hesitant to accept them with open arms into my mind palace but it wasn’t very long until I couldn’t imagine the server without them.

And from day 1 I was so impressed with the planning and story of the server, forcing people to stay interested. That’s something the dream smp didn’t have. I honestly don’t think I would need any of the events to have a good time, but oh my god do they make it so fun.

And the animatics???? Hello?????? I love it so much.

Now I’ve learned to accept any new members immediately. Korean members join? TIME TO DRAW THEM!

Quackity started this project with a clear vision. It is so clearly a huge passion project for him. I don’t doubt for a second that it will keep going no matter what happens.

This server has exposed me to so many creators I would never have even heard of and that’s the point. I only speak English. Without this server, I would not know half of my current silly little blorbos.

I can’t believe how creative and funny Roier is. I think about Cellbit Bagi’s lore all the time. I find myself saying “I am the best!” After Etoiles. I’ve tried to absorb as much of the fuga impossivel lore as I can. I adore Baghera’s chaos. Even some of the English speaking people I didn’t really watch that much, like jaiden, fit, even slimecicle, who I now watch probably more than anyone else.

The other day, I watched the stream of cellbit and roier playing hospital 666. In Spanish!! I don’t speak Spanish!!! I only understood about half of what they’re saying and I’m sure that half is because of QSMP. That’s incredible. This is something so much bigger than any one of us.

QSMP has given me so many people to start watching and drawing/writing/thinking about. It has given me hours upon hours of laughing and smiling. It has given me a new hyperfixation to occupy my thoughts before bed.

It means so much to me. Ever since it started, I’ve been so much happier. I could never have imagined something like this would come around. Honestly, there is not anything like this. It is the first of its kind, hopefully not the last 👀

A year went by fast. And I’m so glad to have been here since the beginning. But even then, new people join this community all the time. That’s so cool. This server has in just a year added so many more content creators, and by extension, fans. It’s insane.

And I am so, so excited for what the future will bring us 😊

#qsmp #qsmp thoughts #QSMP anniversary #QSMP 1 year #happy birthday QSMP #qsmp appreciation #thank you quackity

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binchansbiceps · 11 months

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I Have Been Playing With A Superstar Chapter 3

You could hardly believe that Lee Felix was standing in front of you asking if you were your username in discord meaning this had to be … “ALYFT?” you asked. Felix smiled and nodded “yep that’s me it’s great to finally meet you!” he says as he pulls you up and into a hug. You are more than sure he has seen the shocked disbelieving look on your face at who he is considering everything you ever told him on what you think about him and his group. Which may have gotten a little simp talking over some members if not all at least once. “Big surprise huh?” he asked, finally releasing you from the hug all you could do was nod. “Have you ordered anything to drink yet?” he asked you shook your head “i'll grab us some teas” he said and went to go order them.

As you sat down in your chair you did everything you could to pull yourself together. You now realised his work meetings are the concerts, and that his project was all the practices for his blocking and singing. And that in fact the man you had been friends with for over a year has been LEE FELIX! The deep voiced Australian, and sixth oldest member of Stray Kids.

“Peach tea lemonade right?” he asked as he set the drink in front of you and took his own seat across from you. “Yes thank you Felix and my name is Y/N” you told him finally having the words to speak to him. “Your welcome Y/N” “so how bad were you laughing at me as i said everything i did about you and the others?” you had to ask as it was the only thing on your mind. “I did a little giggling but you are a stay so i was not as surprised as you think” he told you “get a lot of that on bubble huh?” you laughed out. He nodded as he took a sip of his drink “I can't believe you're you and I've been playing games with you … wait! That means the other friends you brought into some of our games were the others?!” you realised, that yes sometimes instead of just you two playing with randos in the world on some games mostly mario kart and smash bros A. or Felix would ask you if some of his other friends could played with you two, which you always said yes too, never having a problem with it as you wanted to maybe be their friend to one day, if meeting him ever happened, and hangout in real life happened often after words. “Yeah it was the others, they really like playing with you, they also snuck in on more games then you are probably thinking too” he laughed at your shocked face that kept getting more shocked as more things keep dawning on you about him and who he is with most of the time.

After your many little freak outs you settle into how you would usually talk to him in discord. Finding it not that different talking to him in person, he really was the bright sunshine boy you and many other stays called him, as he just kept smiling and laughing talking to you and it was all completely honest. Of course being an empath this made you the same way and you absolutely loved every second of it. Nobody else in the world was like Felix and you were glad to have been his friend.

Teas finished and the sun having moved pretty far to the other side of the sky but neither of you noticed the time flying by, having too much fun finally hanging out in person. Till Felix’s phone rang and he immediately answered after reading the caller id. Not understanding a thing as he spoke in Korean you looked at your own phone to see Mini having texted you and just sent a message saying if you did not answer her right now she was coming to hunt down the bastard who thought he could kidnap you. Telling her you were okay and that she didn’t need to hunt anyone down, you weren't kidnaped and you would try to explain everything to her later. Felix hung up and sighed as he put his phone in his pocket. “That was Chan he’s worried where i am and how long i’ve been out since i was supposed to be practising with everyone else today but he gave me the time off secretly to meet up.” he explained “it’s okay Mini just said she was about to hunt you down for kidnaping me too” you laughed out

“Oh speaking of Mini, did you two get tickets for the concert?” he asked. You shook your head “i didn’t and Mini was just a little short before they sold out in the section” you explained. He looked a little happy at hearing this “good now i really don’t feel bad about getting you these” he said as he passed you an envelope. You gave him a look before taking it “what?” you asked as you looked inside and pulled out 2 front row at the damn barrier standing tickets for both performances and sound check tickets and backstage passes.

Your mouth dropped open and slowly you looked up at Felix “wha? how? when? where? why? wha?” you so intelligently asked, unable to form words. “I wanted you to come and have really good seats and to be able to hang out after the show too and i know you wouldn’t want to come alone and would have felt bad if you left Mini behind and i should meet your best friend and you should meet mine” he explained. You continued to just stare at him, unable to say anything to this god sent sunshine boy. You stood up and walked to his side of the table and hugged him “Felix this is so sweet of you thank you so much” you tell him and pull away to look at him then asking “it’s okay to tell Mini who you are? i thought i would have had to keep you a secret even from her" "if the two of you can keep this to yourselves that would be great but Chan said it’s okay to tell her and for her to meet the group too” he told you. “Well now i need a concert outfit 2 actually” you laughed out as Felix got up and grabbed his things “i can’t wait to see them” he said as he gave you another hug and started to head for the door “so i’ll see you at the concert then” he waved as he left the cafe and ran to his driver

You called Mini and told her you had to come over right now cause you had to tell her everything that just happened. Walking right into her place you yelled out that you were here, and she called out that she was in her gamer room. Upon entering the room you saw her sitting at her computer playing a game of Valorant. Waiting for her to finish her game you sat bouncing on the couch she had in there.

When she finished she turned around and looked at you expectantly. “Okay so for starters I'm not lying to you” you tell her “you never lie Y/N so what he a serial killer or something?” she asked “no he’s Felix” you tell her. She just sits there looking at you for a few minutes. “What?” she asks “he’s Lee Felix, i know, i was shocked when he asked if i was me and then when he pulled me up to hug me” you explained but she cut you off “WHAT?” “yeah and he is exactly like he seems and he even gave us these” you told her handing her the envelope. When she opened it and took out the tickets and passes she froze. “He wants to meet you and he wants us to meet the others too after the concert” you tell her. She looks up at you “how the hell did you manage to find and befriend Felix of Stray Kids?” “I have absolutely no idea” you tell her. “Wait so we get to meet the others? Like all of them?” she asked, seeming to just now absorb all your words. “Yes they want to meet me and Felix wants to meet you and so you get to meet them too” you explained. ”the only thing is i don’t think we can tell anyone else so it has to stay between us” you let her know “okay i can keep this a secret it’s SKZ i will do anything just to meet them” she tells you. You both laugh at the situation and the random luck you seemed to have for this to happen and figure out what to wear and how the make up Mini was going to do on the two of you would go.

#stray kids x reader #bang chan x reader #changbin x reader #han jisung x reader #lee know x reader #felix x reader #hyunjin x reader #seungmin x reader #i.n x reader

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amrv-5 · 7 months

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HI ⭐️! (loved Droughtland, would love to hear commentary) :)

HELLO and THANK YOU FOR THE ASK and I'm SO GLAD YOU LIKED IT I loved WRITING IT ARGHH!!!! Also tagging in @catgrub who asked the same just a few minutes later -- HELLO and THANK YOU ZANE!!! Since there were two recs for Droughtland I feel like the extreme length of the following Commentary can be excused.

(For context: I realized I've got 0 idea of how to do a Director's Commentary except for ones I've seen where directors just rewatch their own movie and speak overtop of it, so, I did the same except with reading and typing. This is my read-along author commentary on Droughtland, arranged in chronological order--feel free to look at it with the OG, or not, it should stand alone just fine. Or ignore it entirely. My god it's fucking long, so sorry. Anyway, onwards.)

Okay close reading. Okay commentary. Engaging on this journey together yaaaay.

[Iowa, 1962]

Okay, from the first line, we’re invoking concerns of location, identity, belonging, otherness—Radar struggling to adjust to home because he senses he’s been changed by his experiences in a way that makes him incompatible with the life he used to lead. He’s good at his job, we sense that he’s well-respected, but he’s undeniably not entirely present. Everything he does, sees, thinks, remembers, ends up in service of the Project, which I think I’ve (maybe not obviously or even all that consciously) tried to imply has an element of spiritual or religious calling to it, given that we’re introduced to it in a church.

And retrospectively enjoying the complexity of Radar running the line between escapism and catharsis in his writing at the end of this first section. He misses the people he was close to, that much is clear, and writing is a way to feel close to them. And yet he’s also mentally returning over and over again to a war. A theme I’ve played with in the background of my BeejHawk fics, and more centrally in Droughtland, is one I sort of cribbed from Michael Herr’s Dispatches: Who are you after the most defining event of your life has ended?

[Iowa, 1952]

...And who are you when you KNOW the most defining event of your life has ended? That’s not to say the War Was A Good Experience and One To Reminisce Over. In fact the war being experientially horrific only complicates this idea more. I’m fascinated by how somebody goes about the rest of their life knowing with near-certainty that anything / everything they experience will likely never be as impactful on their sense of self and arc of life than a single past event. Anyway, this ends up concerning Radar greatly, who moves from that Defining Event—Drafted Into the Korean War—back to the rhythms of family and farm life, where he expects himself to be content with the life he’d always assumed he’d have. Actually I’ve read more and realized I had him state that concern textually, rendering this redundant. Ah well. Moving on.

Okay, something else—Radar and writing and fiction and voice. I wanted to get across very clearly that the driving force of his writing is a direct desire to communicate—his first attempt at beginning the book takes the form of an introduction (“My name is Radar O’Reilly”), and he states that writing lets a fellow talk to people who aren’t around. The silent implication being, then, that he’s got no-one real to talk to. Another important set of questions getting kicked around in this piece: Why do we write? Is writing still communication if it’s never shared?

I wanted to play with the idea specifically of writing in relation to loneliness. If you’ve got nobody to talk to, or no way to express yourself meaningfully, or nobody who is interested in understanding you, it makes a lot of sense to sink into the realm of the creative, which we see Radar do here very explicitly. He doesn’t have any close connections, really, or at least not ones he thinks he can explain his new sense of self to, so he turns to writing. Summoning the last people who really understood how he felt, in some ways, writing to communicate with people who are dead or gone from him. Making some record of himself, his experiences, the way he sees the world—an attestation of self, or something, in direct defiance of a landscape and life that feels flat, uncaring, inaccessible—he starts writing alone in a field.

[Iowa, 1959]

Next—mm, field fire section, which was my favorite to write. I’m clearly and obviously soft for rural concerns. I know it’s been pointed out that my voice is significantly different in this fic than in my others, and I’ll admit that I did dip into the author-voice I usually reserve for my personal fictionalizations of family histories, which largely concern, go figure, rural American questions of identity, place, belonging, family, fulfillment, etc. And yet the usual Vonnegut-y sensibilities aren’t wholly gone—the idea of Radar being a volunteer fireman was lifted both from Vonnegut’s life AND volunteer firefighters' positioning in his work as bastions of selfless humanity and civic duty. I like the idea of a latently lonely Radar doing all these very quiet upright civically-minded things. Frequently good people are dealt bad hands, and aren’t cared for by their communities, and still go on doing good anyway.

[Iowa, 1963]

Reading on—and the arrival of BeejHawk. It’s been long enough by this point that Radar’s sort of been subsumed by the Project. We see that tendency in him as he anticipates seeing ‘Dr. Pierce’ and meets Hawkeye instead.

And then—AH! At last! The title is Droughtland, obviously, and that’s a multivalent image, but here’s at least one moment and facet of relief: Sometimes, he thought, a fellow just needed words. Words and words and words like rain on a drought. And the good doctors Pierce and Hunnicutt had always known how to talk up a storm.

As much as it’s a relief, it’s also destabilizing to suddenly have people notice him after so long living almost entirely within himself—Hawkeye calling him Radar shocks him into silence—wow, I’m realizing belatedly just HOW MUCH this fic is about loneliness, actually. Funny the things you can catch on a reread. His name is important, that’s all, and Hawkeye would understand that.

Meanwhile BeejHawk as a unit are very clearly sensing something wrong—not wrong, maybe, but not all right, either. Radar’s Restaurant Allegory is key here as he admits that ‘enjoyment’ is absolutely meaningless in the context of his life—it doesn’t matter if you like the restaurant if it’s the only option. It’s not that he likes or dislikes it—it’s that forming and expressing an opinion would be pointless. This is a stand-in for his opinion on life, which Hawkeye finds distressing, though I think he’d agree with Radar to a degree on his related idea that happiness, delight, joy are intentional practices more than consistent feelings (another idea cribbed from elsewhere: Ross Gay’s Book of Delights, which I am coming to realize sunk way more deeply into my psyche at age 19 than I thought. I may elaborate someday if there’s ever an interest in Parker Creative Nonfiction because the story’s sort of ???, but also, maybe not).

Anyway, Hawk at last manages to drag a bit of real sentiment out of Radar: writing, and the Project, where so much of his internal life is focused (Hawk makes a Lot’s wife joke, because of course he does, but also I like him invoking a story where somebody looks backward on something terrible and suffers for their inability to turn away).

And from here Radar takes the plunge and finally gives all that lonely writing an audience. Terrifying, but it pays off—Hawk affirms that he’s very good (important to me that Radar’s very good as a writer coming from outside a formal academic context. Everybody has the potential to create resonant art, and I wanted to be clear that Radar’s interest in something like the Iowa Writer’s Workshop isn’t the need to be Validated by the Institution or to Escape some sort of poorly-informed or condescending vision of Rural Nonintellectualism (bad themes!!! I hate them!!! NOT at play here, or at least consciously attempted to subvert) but as an extension of the desire for artistic community. To be seen and heard, instead of all the silent listening he’s been doing for years.)

The tradeoff of communicating, by the way—Hawk is a good listener, and picks up on a number of things maybe Radar wasn’t even aware he was revealing in his work—loneliness, vague dissatisfaction, a focus on finding interior fulfillment when the external world fails to provide. Scary, destabilizing, embarrassing… but eventually very, very good. For Radar, at least, who’s suddenly feeling like he’s allowed to want something.

Moving on. Hawkeye’s reaction to learning he’s a part of Radar’s Project. Obviously he’s worried about how he’s going to come across. I think it’s a very scary thing to be the object of cameras, of writerly gaze, all of it, because it creates an image that exists entirely outside the object's control. How horrifying/enticing/awful/fascinating it’s got to be to be able to find out how you exist in another person’s mind… and when that image was formed in the lowest years of your life… of course Hawk’s apprehensive. And clearly it rattles him—but maybe in the way any really, really resonant art rattles us, based on his next-morning response.

Hawk comes downstairs and we get this baffling little kiss scene, which I’ll be honest I wasn’t entirely sure what it meant when I was writing, only that it felt right. But now I’m thinking it’s clearly an exchange of seeing—Hawk feels he’s been thoroughly Seen in Radar’s work, for better or worse, and comes downstairs to communicate in this abstract way that he sees Radar, too—and affirms what he sees.

So we end with these moments, finally, of communication and understanding and connection. Very obviously there’s the Hawk-Radar connection, which is so intense and emotive it’s basically psychic (what's good writing if not successfully communicating an idea or image with all original emotive force and vividness from one mind to another?). There’s also Beej, who isn’t Hawk’s brand of incidentally clairvoyant, but is all around a very bright, kind, warm person who’s able to give Radar the sort of horrendously necessary everyday sort of conversation and care that makes life bearable, the kind it’s so easy to take for granted when you’re experiencing it regularly. And then there’s BJ stepping in to hold Hawk even if he doesn’t fully understand what’s transpired between Hawk and Radar, because he knows Hawk and knows that he needs a second of support, which is sort of psychic in its own way.

And that's the end. So, overall, I’d say the thing is very directly related to the title—drought of the soul which is only starting to lift by the end of the piece. One storm doesn’t solve a drought, after all—you need consistent rain, and time for ecological repair. And still the first few drops of rain after a dry spell feel awfully good.

#THANK YOU BOTH FOR THE ASK!!!!!!#and. i'm soooo sorry for the length of this I was having Fun. do not feel obligated to Actually read it it's Excessively Detailed #anyway. ouuugh #droughtland #fic commentary

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exoluxionlove · 1 year

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Baekhyun Interview - W Korea March 2023

Days With Baekhyun Returning after two years, Baekhyun used the word "comfort" often.

- - - - -

Baekhyun's only wish is to sing heart-felt, timeless songs for us. Baekhyun talked about the days spent with us and the days ahead of us.

<W Korea> How many days has it been since you were discharged from the military?

Today is precisely the third day since I've been out.

You have finally gifted flower shoes to the fans. ('Giving flower shoes' is a Korean phrase that means returning to the significant other who had been waiting for their partner to return from military service.)

So, you recently did a live show to celebrate discharge. Seeing you're still as bright and youthful, fans recalled the time you promoted your second solo mini-album, "Delight," released three years ago.

Honestly, I was super worried. But I was relieved to see their warm reactions. I'm grateful to my parents. Haha.

You talked about your time in the army during the live show.

Most of my training campmates were born after 1999, except for a few. I was the eldest there. Everyone followed me like their older brother. I still keep in touch with the friends I met then. Recently, I got a call from one of them. He said, "I am working out at the gym right now." He was a skinny one, and every single day at the training camp, I told him to work out.

Baekhyun, as we know, was the life of the party among the EXO and SuperM members. Your bubbly personality would have shined in the army training camp.

There was no exception. I didn't let anyone fall behind. Whenever I saw someone wanting to give up, I said, "You can't lose to things like this," "If you keep giving up, this becomes your habit," and, "Real life outside is much harder than this." I don’'t let my friends give up or fall behind. I pull them together.

I presume the past two years have been a time to realize and reassess who Byun Baekhyun really is as a person, not just Baekhyun from EXO.

Yeah. My MBTI changed during the break from ISFP to ESTJ. I've been known as a homebody for a long time among my friends. But I’'m actually an extrovert and a very active person. But when I look back on my childhood, I barely had time to spend at home. To the point where my mother always said, "How come I see my son only for breakfast?" I felt like I went back to my real self during the break.

Was it also a time to realize again what your fans mean to you?

Of course. I still have a long way to go to learn about the fans thoroughly. There's something I learned this time, though. The fact that our existence to each other is a lot bigger than what we think. During the first year of my alternative military service, I looked back a lot. I watched a lot of the past concert videos. At concerts, I had a lot of fun with them. There were times when I saw my facial expression on the stage and thought I really did bust my butt to pull everything. Also, sometimes I felt really empty and felt this unfillable void. At one point, I thought, "Will they still be there?" while listening to the cheers of fans in those videos. They are like a really good teacher who would grade me and encourage me. They inspire me to do my homework. They have had me run, take lessons and become a better person. I want to do well to hear their acknowledgment. If they didn't exist, I probably would not have tried so hard to come this far.

Your Namu-wiki page has a "Fan Love" section. As we read through the things you've said to the fans, we thought even a real boyfriend couldn't say such sweet things.

Haha. Definitely my mom's influence there. She speaks so gently. She is the sweetest person, really. And I am the youngest in the family. My family poured sweet love on me. Sometimes, fans ask me how I can speak so nicely. To be honest, I don't know. I feel it's nothing special, to me, a very ordinary and everyday thing.

It seems like fans could rarely feel the army break. You filmed 20 pieces of YouTube content ahead of time and released them during the break.

I know how hard it is to wait. Even when we did the EXO concert tour, we couldn't release an album during that time. So it had been a long-standing concern about how to fill the vacancy. In particular, no one was trying to do something special to fill the vacancy during the military break. At first, I thought about making a small game instead of a video. Like the Tamagotchi game, fans can foster 'Baekhyun' from level 1 for 641 days while I am away. Feed him, water him. Haha.

Yeah, that is pretty much it. Actually, I was swamped when we were filming the YouTube videos. I had a hectic schedule. It was just around when my third solo mini album <Bambi> came out, and on top of that, SuperM’'s promotion overlapped. But after filming them, I felt so indescribably proud.

The 2021 album <Bambi> leaves much to be desired in some ways because it had no official activities due to your military service. Nonetheless, it recorded high sales, enough to bring the double million-seller title. It was also the album released in the year of your 30th birthday, showcasing your finest skills as a vocalist.

<Bambi> was created strictly with my own needs and vision. I tried everything I wanted to do without looking at anyone, and I wanted to free my mind by doing so. You are right. I put in everything I could as a vocalist. I first rearranged my vocal tone around the time of my first solo mini-album <City Lights> in 2019, and I wanted to see how much I had grown since then. I became very dedicated because I thought I could make a better sound than two years ago. I tried the vocal ranges that I wouldn't have chosen in the past because I was too nervous. I purposely chose difficult music because I wanted to experience both failures and trials.

In particular, the title song Bambi seems to have been a regular song for the music school entrance exam that year. It's perfect for showing off your vocal skills going back and forth freely with your falsetto, modal, and head voice.

Well, I don't really recommend it. It's a high-risk song, the beat and rhythm are tough. It's a pretty challenging song to sing well.

With the release of <Bambi>, Baekhyun's genre and brand have become more apparent. "Baekhyun" reminds us of groovy R&B beats from UN Village in the album <City Lights> and Candy in <Delight>.

R&B is a genre that I've been attached to for a long time, so I’ll continue with it. However, I also want new challenges. I want to try this and that without being too picky. I want to be an all-rounder. I'm interested in singing-rap these days.

Which musician are you paying attention to as a reference these days?

I've gotten closer to Colde recently. I like his singing style, and it's fabulous that he pulls off the melody rhythmically as if he's rapping. I've requested songs from Colde. I don't know what kind of work will come out yet, but we'll work together soon.

As a musician, there's no more valuable experience than getting a "response" to your song. All three solo albums released so far have recorded respectable sales. Did you expect such success?

Not at all. It exceeded my expectations. This record was possible thanks to the efforts of many K-pop singers ahead of me. In particular, the sales volume of the second album <Delight> was the highest in 20 years of Korean pop music history.

<Delight> became the first solo album to achieve the million-seller title, and you became the second artist to hold such titles for both the group and solo albums, following after Seo Tai-ji.

Yes, but it's all thanks to the dedication of so many Korean musicians. As K-pop became more known worldwide, more people started paying attention to K-culture. The Korean artists before me had already paved the roads and I just got to piggyback on them.

I don't feel any guilt when I listen to your music. Maybe it's a complete anachronism, but there's still a certain prejudice regarding idol music. Similarly, some idol music is referred to as a 'hidden masterpiece.' But when I listen to Baekhyun's solo music, I feel like I'm just listening to really good music.

Thanks. I indeed paid a lot of attention to that. I chose a lot of genres that wouldn't come from SM. SM prefers strong and intense sounds, but I wanted to focus on easy-listening music. It was partly because of my preference and strategic choice to differentiate between EXO and solo activities. Seeing that many of the tracks from my solo albums are still receiving a lot of love, I think it was a good decision.

It is common to spot excessiveness in solo albums by Idol group members. It was rather unique that Baekhyun has an easy mood, as you've just said.

I pushed for that. I kept thinking, 'I'll make more easy-listening music,' 'The music should not change in the middle,' and 'The melody should flow as expected.' I wanted to minimize statement sounds and focus on the lyrics. There was even some feedback from the company that it fell short. But I kept pushing. My motto was to do something that sounds easy to people's ears, like passive music, even if it may not feel 'sophisticated or innovative' for some.

What you just said seems connected to the question of, 'what is good music to me as a musician?'

Probably. In a way, I'm making music that's pleasant to listen to. But I don't usually listen to a lot of music. My ears are so tired. Since I'm a singer, I need to know a lot of songs, but when I find one I like, I listen to it over and over. There's something in common when I look at the songs I'm hooked on. It's not too much, and it just has one or two significant factors.

For example?

I especially like old-fashioned pop songs. Peabo Bryson's Why Goodbye is also a song that I love, for example. If you listen to it, there's a particular section once in the bridge, once in the chorus, and once in the verse. You can listen to it comfortably, and the sound is completely filled with only vocals.

What is the vocal tone you pursue?

If I could have a voice that doesn't go out of date, I couldn't ask for more.

It's also the most challenging thing.

I know. I once imagined, "Will Baekhyun's episode of 'Hidden Singer' come out?" I don't think so. Because my voice doesn't have a distinctive feature. But it's definitely a voice that can give you some comfort. A good tone depends on the time and taste. It's something that keeps moving without being fixed. So I just want my voice to be peaceful and stable. I hope I can make the sound warm enough to relax your body. That's all I want.

It's been 11 years since your debut, and you're still taking vocal lessons every week, right?

Yes. I have a big desire to evolve. I thought about it when EXO received a lot of attention with Growl in 2013. 'Why are so many people going crazy? Am I really that good? I don't think so. If the heat goes away, they will see me.' That's why I kept trying. I always criticize myself more than others do. It's not a matter of high self-esteem and low self-esteem. I'm just continuing to make up for my shortcomings because I know my weaknesses better than anyone else.

To me, Baekhyun is not a person with low self-esteem but one who constantly and carefully self-censors himself.

Yes, that's right. Maybe I am a perfectionist, and I hate it when there's no complete ending. If I don't think I can finish something properly, I don't even start. I tend to get extremely disappointed with myself if I don't do something perfectly at work.

A perfectionist who pursues easiness... It sounds hard. Haha.

Haha. As a musician, I want to be an easy person who can blend in with the public. I don't want to be a musician who is so cool that people admire and want to follow. I want to be someone people can talk to easily when they meet me on the street while listening to my song.

I want to deliver encouraging lyrics. And deliver the message that you shouldn’'t give up easily and try to face more challenges. I think the disappearance of the "Jeong" culture played a role in making people get easily tired these days. In the past, when a neighbor moved in, we used to make steamed rice cakes. If the next door neighbor cooks a lot of food, they would share it with others. But living in a disconnected world without affection, people seem to think only of themselves. I want to put a hopeful message in my song that we can all unite in harmony again.

It's been two years since W Magazine and Baekhyun met—, since the cover of the March 2021 issue, right? Throughout today's shoot, the staff said you were sexy. Baekhyun's "soft sexiness" that you've shown in your solo career seems to be reflected in today's shoot.

Sexy... Haha. I don't think the sexiness that I have is the sexiness that's full of intense emotions. It's more like this. Sometimes you play with your friends, and you feel unexpectedly sexy. I think I have the sexiness to make people a little curious about me. Haha.

Today's shoot was with Cartier's Tank Française Watch and Icon Collection. These are pieces that have been called Wannabe by many artists for their timeless classic aesthetic. Regardless of time and nationality, who is the greatest artist for Baekhyun?

Michael Jackson! Michael Jackson was the only artist who stood still on stage for a few seconds or minutes and people couldn't stop cheering. His songs have made many people cry for a long time, giving them joy and happiness. So just seeing him standing still on the stage makes them tear up. There isn't an artist who can beat Michael Jackson.

Still, what would be your secret weapon that you could win over Michael Jackson?

Hmm... My gentle way of talking? Haha.

EXO recently announced the news of EXO’s 11th-anniversary fan meeting. What would it look like if you were to compare EXO to family?

Children who were raised by a strict father but had an infinitely sweet mother? Maybe the stage is our dad. We work hard on stage until it feels like our bodies would break literally. But when we get off stage, we act like kids. Not one friend is rude, and everyone is so kind. When we talk to each other, ther's no difference from when we debuted 11 years ago or when we were trainees.

What are the three things Baekhyun is focusing on these days?

I'm into golf. Out on the golf field, my arms got so tanned, dark enough to leave a watch mark on my wrist. I feel very relieved when I go rounding and see the open space. The second one is the direction of the vocals. And for the third, I was going to say exercise but I'm going to change that. (Kim) Jong-kook, whom I became close with through workouts, said, "It's time for you to focus on your back." But hip workouts are too hard. Haha. The last one is EXO's comeback. We will return as soon as possible with a high-quality album this year.

Source

#Baekhyun #Exo #W Korea

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causeilikelix · 1 year

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'Cause I Like You - Chapter Thirteen - Riding the Soundwaves - Two Years Later

↳ Pairing: Felix x OC / Hyunjin x OC (later)

↳ Genre: Romance, comedy, smut (eventual), slow burn, enemies (idiots) to friends (idiots) to lovers (probably still idiots), high school au, college au, non-idol au

↳ See Chapter One for summery and blanket warnings

↳ Chapter warnings: Like one (1) singular mention of being turned on

↳ Read on my A03: Here

↳ Notes: Sorry this took so long! School, work, you get it! The semester is over in two weeks and then I'm gonna write some more.

<- Chapter Twelve- Chapter Fourteen ->

“Good morning, KNU! You are listening to 90.5 The Art, based out of the Korean National University of Arts! I am your DJ for the next hour, Bbokdi. Welcome to the very first installment of my brand new show: ‘I Am Who?’ I hope we get along! You can follow me and interact with me on Kakao talk or Instagram at @Bbokdi_whoshow.

For this show I just wanted to spend some time with you lovely listeners, play some of my favorite songs these days, and do a couple of talking segments. I have a segment for anonymous confessions and a segment for messages you’d like to send to someone else! Seeing as it’s my first show, I asked a few of my friends to submit some for me to read. However, if you would like me to read something, please message me!

I don’t want to talk your ear off right off the bat, so I’m going to play one of my favorite songs. I’ve been listening to it pretty much non-stop all week so I’m excited to play it for you today. So let’s get started and please enjoy this incredible moving song by Day6, and my message to you! ‘Hi, Hello.’

...

Ah, wasn’t that lovely! Again that was a favorite of mine from Day6 called ‘Hi, Hello’. I hope you enjoyed it! Once again you’re listening to 90.5 The Art and I am DJ Bbokdi with my show “‘ Am Who?’

Let’s see, I really want to feel like I’m friends with all of you and I know that will come in time, but I wanted to introduce myself properly. I am a freshman here at KNU and I have always enjoyed music and production, so in an ideal world I will be studying that while here. Some of my favorite artists are Coldplay, NCT, Sam Smith, Macklemore, and of course Twice. So, you’ll likely hear a lot of them while listening to the show! If there’s anything else you want to know about me, please don’t hesitate to send me a message!

Without further ado, let’s get back to the music. I have a bunch of great songs lined up for this set including Bruno Mars, 2PM, and Imagine Dragons!”

~!~!~!~!~!~

“... and that was ‘Mirotic’ by TVXQ!. And honestly, what a classic. I admit that I do like some of the older K-pop, as it honestly did set the stage for K-pop as we know it today.

I hope you are all doing well with your midterms! I’ve been studying like crazy all day and all night. I thought the studying I did in high school was intense, but it’s nothing like that! I wish you all luck on your exam week!

We’re going to go into a quick break and then we’ll be back with your favorite segment: Secret Confessions!

...

And we’re back! You’re listening to me! DJ Bbokdi on 90.5 The Art out of Korea National University of Art. Now it’s time for ‘Secret Confessions’ where you guys send me anonymous messages on Kakao or Instagram and I read them over the air! Sometimes it’s nice to get it off your chest. This segment has really taken off since I started the show a few weeks ago! I’m so happy you guys like it. It makes me feel so warm inside.

Alright, first we have a confession from ‘In My Feels’. Well, we’re already off to a good start! They say: ‘I have had a crush on a boy in my class for the longest time and I feel like I’m in middle school all over again! We’re not in the same group for a project and I don’t know if he feels the same. I like him so much and I don’t know what to do. Help!’

Oh, we’ve all been there, I think. Honestly, it’s been so long since I’ve liked anyone like this so if anyone has any advice, please text it in and let’s see how we can help! I would suggest just talking to them and maybe asking about a concept you’re talking about in class. Make sure it’s something they seem to know a lot about. That way you can get them talking easily. It will make him feel good about being able to help you with something he knows a lot about and you feel good because you initiated an easy conversation.

Next, I have a message from ‘Dog Days.’ They say: ‘Yesterday it was my turn to walk the dog, but I was so tired from school that I paid my little brother to take the dog out instead while I took a nap. My mother got home from work a while later and thanked me for taking the dog out, but I never did! And I didn’t correct her.’

Wow, looks like you got away with it! I bet that feels great to say. Alright, let’s go ahead and play a song and we’ll be right back!

...

Welcome back! Inspired by the first message, I played ‘The Feels’ by Twice and I am unashamed to say I was dancing a little in the studio. It’s such a fun, high energy song and it always makes me feel warm when I listen to it.

The next confession I have is from ‘Bbokie Fan’. They say: ‘Sometimes I go through the radio archives and listen to your old shows to help me fall asleep. Your voice is so warm and calming and I could listen for hours!’ Well, thank you! Oh, that is so sweet of you to say! I hope you’re sleeping in a cold room or something cause I think if you’re sleeping somewhere warm and my voice makes you warm it might... I dunno, make it too warm? Well, anyway, you can look forward to more shows from me! Maybe I’ll play a few quieter songs to help you sleep better.

Next we’ll be hearing from ‘Rainbow’ who says: ‘I want to get this off my chest and I think you might be my safest option. I think I’m gay, and I don’t know how to tell my family. I’ve never had a girlfriend and I don’t want one. I’ve only ever liked boys, but I’ve never had a boyfriend. I’m too scared to tell anyone who I truly am.’

Wow, I’m honored that you told me! Of course, your secret is safe with me. I’ll be honest in return. I can go either way. I’ve liked both girls and boys but I’ve never told anyone about the boys before. Sorry to my friends who are just learning about this! But I don’t think it’s anything to be ashamed of. I think that if you don’t feel safe coming out to your family, wait until you are before saying anything. I know it’s tempting to scream it to the world, but your safety is the most important thing. I’m positive that one day you will find like minded people and you will find someone with whom you belong.

Oh, look. It looks like I have time for one more song before I have to sign off. Hmm... I wonder what I should play. Just kidding, I pre plan my playlists. Once again my name is DJ Bbokdi, thank you for listening to the show today! This is ‘Viva la Vida’ by Coldplay!”

~!~!~!~!~!~

“Guys I am just floored with the support you’re giving me! Just now my Instagram passed two thousand followers! I never would have imagined my show getting so popular in less than a semester, but I am very happy it did!

I have people saying they love the music I play, my advice, and how I sometimes whisper into the microphone. My best friend always says I have a good voice for radio, so I’m glad to be putting it to good use. I just wanted to say thank you to everyone for saying such wonderful things!

Anyway, in the last few minutes I’ve gotten a bunch of questions that I want to answer for you, so we’re switching gears a little bit! I just got the question ‘do you have any pets?’ and the answer is unfortunately no. I would love to adopt a little kitten or a puppy, but I am about to move in with a couple of my friends in an apartment that does not allow pets. So maybe one day! Until then, I satiate my desire to have a pet by going to dog and cat cafes to cuddle with them there!

Someone also asked ‘What was your favorite memory from high school?’ and I had to think about it for a minute. I had so many great memories in high school. However, I would say this. In my junior year I transferred schools and I was worried about fitting in, but right away I ran into an old friend from primary school and from there I met many of the guys I consider my best friends today. So, I think I got lucky in that regard.

Ah! Sneaky! Someone asked what my real name is! I would have told you if I wanted you to know! I know you’re all so curious, but part of the fun is the anonymity. I know you all have so many more things you want to ask, but I’ve been talking forever. So, I think it’s time to play a song!

Honestly, I’ve been thinking about someone I knew in high school a lot. I’ve been missing them and wondering where they ended up. Whenever I think about high school I always think about this song. I used to listen to it every day on the bus ride in. It always motivated me to face the day, and I hope it can help you, too.

This is ‘Amsterdam’ by Imagine Dragons.

...

That last song we just heard was ‘Sugar We’re Goin Down’ by Fallout Boy. Truly, what a classic. I really like the era of music from about 2003 to 2010 with all of those boy bands like Fallout, Panic! At The Disco, Parachute... just to name a few.

Gosh, you guys are swarming me with so many questions! Today I’ve received more questions than confessions, so next week I’ll do an extra long confession segment and focus on questions today! You know I love sharing my thoughts with you guys.

This one reads ‘What did you think of Ali Gatie’s last album? Have you listened to it yet?’

Oh my gosh, of course I’ve listened to it! One of the songs is on my playlist for next week. I really think he has a unique take on...

...

... Which is why I think that is my favorite song off the album. Oh boy, I didn’t mean to talk your ears off about that for so long! We’re going to go through a quick little commercial break and then we’ll continue!

...

Welcome back! You are listening to “I Am Who?” with your favorite smooth-talking DJ Bbokdi! For those of you just joining us, I’ve decided to mostly just answer questions today instead of doing confessions, so I’ll be reading only confessions next week!

Just in, I got a very important question from number 3783, ‘Important! Please read! Are you dating anyone?’ Oh! Haha, I suppose I should have been expecting this question at some point. To be honest, no. I’ve gone on a few casual dates with people but I haven’t had a significant other since high school. I haven’t been terribly interested in dating, since I’ve mostly just been focusing on University!

Next I have a question from number 8236 asking, ‘DJ Bbokdi, what is your number one hobby on the weekends?’

Oh this is an easy one! Lately, when I have free time, I’ve been baking a lot! Last weekend I got to try out this incredible banana bread recipe and...

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Welcome to the show! You are listening to 90.5 The Art and I am DJ Bbokdi. For today’s show, since earlier this semester I did a show all with questions and then later did one with all confessions, I figured we needed a show with all music.

You see, finals week is almost upon us and I know we all have a lot of studying to do. Myself included! So I’ve come up with a great relaxing playlist filled with slow songs and some Lo-Fi stuff to help you focus. I’ll pop in to say hello a few times, but for now let’s just enjoy the music!

Admittedly, this playlist was inspired by someone who I miss and hold dear to my heart, and wherever they are, I hope this brings them a little slice of joy. Our first song today is a favorite of theirs called ‘Kiss Me Slowly’ by Parachute. A part of me always knew they were romantic!

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Welcome to the new semester at KNU! My name is DJ Bbokdi and you’re listening to ‘I Am Who?’ on 90.5 The Art.

Spring is in the air! Well, kind of. It’s still brutally cold since it’s only January but I’m honestly so excited because that means we only have two more months until cherry blossom season. I long for the warm weather and sunny days. I haven’t been on a decent bike ride in years so I hope to go this spring if I get the chance.

This semester, I have a lot of great things lined up for the show and I hope you love them as much as I do! This semester I’ll be incorporating some new things, like a mindfulness ASMR segment, where each show I’ll be reading out some phrases that will hopefully motivate you. I also have a really exciting show planned for Valentine's Day, so please be thinking about questions and confessions you want to send to me! If you send them now they’ll likely get lost, so just think about it and I’ll let you know when to send them!

Since it’s cold outside, I decided I wanted to share with you some warm and motivational songs to get you going. It’s so easy to let that seasonal depression get you into a rut. I get it, I’m the same way. So hopefully today my show will make you feel a little bit better.

This morning we’ll be starting off with ‘Like Ooh Aah’ from my favorite girl group, Twice!

...

Alright, that last song I played was ‘Red Flavor’ by Red Velvet. This playlist is so warm and wholesome. I hope that these songs are warming you up on this cold day. I think it might snow later, so be careful wherever you’re headed!

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Good morning and welcome to the [Show] Valentine’s Day special with me! DJ Bbokdi! Today’s show will be composed of love songs, love confessions, and a few questions from you guys! Typically I avoid questions that get too personal, but I figured I would make an exception today since so many of you have been asking.

Today, we’re going to start right off with a beautiful love song to start the show! This is ‘No Other’ by Super Junior! What a classic!

...

Alright, that last song was ‘For Life’ by Exo. That winter tune made me tear up the first time I listened to it! My roommates made fun of me for it, but I don’t care a bit. It’s just so lovely and an incredible declaration of love.

Speaking of declarations of love, we have some lined up for our anonymous confessions! We have a really interesting one here from ‘Playing With Fire’. He says, ‘I like my dance partner. We’ve been paired together in our classes for the last two semesters and with every project I fall for her more and more. She’s beautiful, funny, and talented, and I can’t believe we’ve been so lucky to work together for so long. Luckily, I think our teachers see that we have chemistry, but I wonder if she sees it?’

Wow, you’ve got it bad, dude. Still, she sounds great and I’m happy for you! Hopefully you can get up the courage to confess. If I were you, I’d at least wait until the end of the semester. You don’t want ruined feelings to make things awkward!

Next I have a confession from ‘Chipmunk’. He says, ‘I’ve been with my girlfriend for two years now, but now I see that I don’t think I’ll ever want to be with anyone else. I want to wait until after we graduate to propose, but I don’t know if I have that kind of self control! I think we can wait that long.’

Oh, congratulations, Chipmunk! That’s so exciting! I hope that you can work with her to build a happy life together. Wow, all of these messages coming in are so happy and warm, I wish I could read them all to you!

Okay, last one before I play another song. This one is from ‘Lovestruck’. They say, ‘Mina-yah! I like you! If you like me back, meet me at our spot and accept my heart!’

How sweet! Mina-ssi, I think this was very brave of them so I hope you can give them a chance! Honestly, for me, it’s always so hard to confess to someone and I think I’ve let a lot of opportunities slip away because of it. So if they’re brave enough to tell you, especially over the radio, I think you could give them a chance.

Anyway, I’m going to play a few songs and go into a quick commercial break and I’ll be back in a few! Starting us off on this set is ‘You Really Are Beautiful’ by Choi Nak Ta!

...

Welcome back to ‘I Am Who?’ with DJ Bbokdi! For this Valentine’s Day special, I wanted to share a little more about myself. In general, I like to keep my identity secret and only a few of my friends know about the show. Especially now that the show is so popular, it’s just easier for me to keep my radio life and my school life separate. But today, because you’re all so lovely and kind to me, I’ve decided to answer a few of the more intimate frequently asked questions.

So! For the first question many of you have asked: ‘Tell us about your first kiss?’. Gosh, it was so long ago. I couldn’t have been older than twelve or thirteen. I remember I was at school, I went to a private Catholic school that was co-ed and one of the girls had a crush on me. This is so embarrassing, but even though I didn’t like her back I agreed to kiss her. So during lunch we went out to the yard and behind a tree and I gave her a little peck. Only a few seconds. It was so embarrassing I couldn’t talk to her for weeks!

Her crush on me went away after that, so I don’t know what that says about my kissing skills. I like to think they’ve improved but it’s not like anyone’s given me any feedback.

Anyways! The next one is... oh boy... ‘Who was your first love?’ This... this isn’t really an easy answer? I had my first love in high school but we knew each other before. She was incredible and pretty and, in hindsight, it was love at first sight. But it took me a while to realize I liked her. In any case, we weren’t close or anything and she liked someone else. She was a piece of work though, but it was fun sometimes. While I never confessed or anything, she made it extremely clear that she wanted nothing to do with me. Last I knew of her, she got accepted into medical school so I haven’t seen her since graduation.

I had a chat with all my friends the other day about this, actually. It was nice to reminisce and think about all the lovely, positive things about my first love. I don’t think I’ll ever see her again, but it’s nice to think about her and I genuinely hope she’s doing well.

Alright, last one before another break! You guys wanted to know if I like anyone now and the answer is... not really? I think I’m still hanging on to some residual feelings from my first love. Those are kind of hard to forget, you know? But anyways, maybe one day I’ll find someone I like. In the meantime, I have you guys!

Okay, for the next song I wanted to play some K.Will, a true romantic classic...

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...

And that was ‘You Were Beautiful’! I’ve been listening to a lot of Day6 recently. I don’t know why, but their songs always hit the spot. The instrumentals are incredible and the lyrics are always so powerful. Honestly, I don’t know why I haven’t listened to them more. I used one of their songs as my first song last year, but at the time I hadn’t listened to much else, but I’m glad I listen to them now! One of my... um, friends, kind of... put me onto them indirectly and now I can’t get enough! They honestly don’t have a bad song, if I’m being honest...

I hope that these slower songs have been helping you prepare for midterms this week! I have literally three exams on Friday and I’m tired already. My wrist is killing me from all the writing and the revision I’ve been doing. I think I’ll do well, but who knows. I just hope I won’t fall asleep during my exam. Anyway, enough talking from me. I wanna make sure my voice is rested for the ASMR Affirmation segment here in a few songs!

This next one is from another artist I’ve only recently started listening to. You guys all know how much of a connoisseur of good music I am, so I always love discovering new music. I came across this completely by chance and I wanted to share it with you. This is a great track from LOONA, a group who is admittedly new to me. This is from their album [12:00], ‘Fall Again’...

...

Alright, the last song in that set was [Song] and while I’m loving all of these great songs, it’s time for ASMR Affirmations.

If you’re just joining the show for the first time, my friends all tell me I have a really nice, deep voice for doing stuff like this. Since I’m too embarrassed to release a proper ASMR Youtube series or something, I decided to do it in small bursts to work up my confidence. Since the theme of my show is generally positive, I want to share warm affirmations with you to help you get through the day. Without further ado, here we go, I’m going to whisper into the mic...

Today I will get everything done that I need to, and even if I don’t, tomorrow is another day.

I wake up every day and I do my best.

I am deliberate and afraid of nothing.

I am here for a reason and I will see it through to the end.

Failure is just another way to learn how to do the right thing.

You all are going so amazing on your exams and I am so proud of you for sticking it out even though it is hard.

Your dreams await you.

...

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Thank you for tuning into [Show] with your favorite DJ, Bbokdi! I’m so thrilled to be back this semester!

Ladies and Gentlemen, it is an absolutely GORGEOUS day to start the new semester. Last year just whizzed right by and I can’t believe I’m already a sophomore! Honestly, I think the fall semester is often my favorite. Starting the semester when it's warm outside and the energy is high is my favorite. I have some great classes lined up this semester and I have some huge projects I’m working on and, honestly, I’m just loving my youth right now.

This show will continue on as it has. I will share my favorite songs, your confessions, answer questions, and do some warm affirmations to start your day! This morning, I’m just so excited so I want to start off with a bright, warm song that I’ve been obsessed with to get the mood right for the morning. This is ‘Shivers’ by Ed Sheeran, featuring Sunmi and Jessi!

...

And that was ‘The Way I Am’ by Charlie Puth! Hopefully, these songs are giving you the energy to start the day! I’ve been really motivated the last few days, so I want to share it with you! These songs have really inspired me recently.

I want to jump into a few of your confessions because I have some great ones that you guys sent in this morning. This is one from number ‘6348’:

‘I just moved away from my family to go to school here and follow my dream. They all said I would regret it, but I don’t. In fact, I don’t even miss them. I’ve never felt more at home.’

Oh wow, I’m so excited for you! It’s hard, I get that. My family and I moved to Seoul so my sisters and I could get a good education, but over the summer they moved back home to be closer to my grandparents. I miss them, but I know I belong here. So, maybe it’s not exactly the same but we’re definitely in a similar boat. I am so excited that you’re following your dreams! Here’s a confession from number ‘8234’:

‘I have a huge crush on my best friend but I’m so afraid to say anything and mess it up! We’re so compatible but for some reason, I can’t seem to take that extra step. I don’t want to ruin a good thing.’

I think we’ve all been there, Friend. At least, I have. I had a crush on my best friend when I was a freshman in high school I think? Anyways, I’m sorry you’re going through a tough time and I hope you can figure out what to do! If it gets too bad, I would consider talking to your friend and seeing what you can do to keep up a healthy relationship. Remember: communication is key!

Alright, last one for the day, we have a message from number ‘0392’:

‘I’ve been studying pretty much every day for years because my parents want me to succeed, but my secret is that I hate it. I don’t want to study for a while and just live my life. I barely was able to convince them to let me come to KNU but even now they want me to be the top student. I feel like my life has been completely taken over by textbooks and exams and I don’t see an end in sight... I feel so burned out.’

Oh wow, I’m sorry to hear that. Studying is hard and I am so proud of you for sticking with it even though you hate it. I hope that soon you can take a break or talk to your parents about letting you take a break. If you really have worked this hard, you deserve to take a rest. Now that I think about it, I had a friend, I say friend... she didn’t like me, but anyway, she was like this. She studied so much our senior year and she got so many nosebleeds from the stress. My friend, you need to prioritize your health above all else. That is what truly matters.

Also, this is your youth! You will never get these years back and it is so important for you to make the most of it and live your life to the fullest. I know that’s easier said than done but sometimes that just means closing your book and drinking your tea or coffee in silence, or sitting down and listening to your favorite song a million times, or going for a walk.

I believe in you!

...

Alright, that’s about all I have for the day, I have to get to class here soon. We listened to some great music and I have just posted my playlist on Twitter! Before I wrap up, I want to take care of some housekeeping!

As of tomorrow, I will be changing my Twitter handle to something a little more fitting so keep an eye open for that and...

...”

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“GOOD MORNING? EARTH to Cha Eunbyeol!” Jiho tugged lightly at the earbud cord dangling from her best friend’s ear.

The girl in question sighed happily as she stared out across the bustling and busy quad. The sun warmed her skin and her favorite radio show warmed her heart. Jiho’s nagging was pure background noise as DJ Bbokdi whispered his final few affirmations of the day into her ear. His rich, smooth voice covered her like warm chocolate and she sighed again. Jiho rolled her eyes and muttered something Eunbyeol couldn’t hear, but it didn’t matter. Not when Bbokdi was talking. Who cared about anything else?

Her sophomore year at KNU was already off to a good start. Eunbyeol’s dance class yesterday went perfectly and she was aptly paired with her favorite dance partner for their final project. The other kids protested, knowing they would get a good grade that way but their professor pretended not to notice. She and Hwang Hyunjin met in her first dance class in college last year, and while they weren’t partners right away, they hit it off swimmingly. They helped each other with their routines and with the choreography their professor had them memorize. Then, during the spring semester they finally got paired together properly for a project and sparks flew. No other dance partner had ever complimented her the way he had. His dance style was distinct and skillful and Eunbyeol wondered why he even needed to take dance classes in the first place.

Eunbyeol only just barely managed to convince her parents that KNU was the place for her to be, and not Seoul National University. Human anatomy and organic chemistry didn’t interest her in the slightest, so she had to go after something she liked. No one except her was surprised when she got accepted into the school. She, Jiho, and Jisung all got their letters on the same day and they met in the library of their high school to open them. Eunbyeol, somehow, was lucky enough to get just enough of a scholarship to convince her parents.

And the rest was history.

She got good grades, had amazing friends, an adorable apartment with Jiho not far from campus, a perfect dance partner, and the warmest radio show to help her through the week. DJ Bbokdi rambled on about something that happened to him earlier this week and she chuckled at the anecdote but finally noticed Jiho pointing at her watch.

“What?” Eunbyeol tugged an earbud out of her ear.

“Don’t you have class?”

“Yeah, I have Fundamentals of Acting of all things at noon, but that’s not for a while.” Eunbyeol waved it off and went to put the earbud back in, but Bbokdi’s voice was rudely cut off by the shrill ringing of her phone. Hyunjin’s handsome profile picture popped up on her phone, alerting her of a call. It was a sweet picture they took together back in March during cherry blossom season. The pair of them smiled into the camera and Eunbyeol could forgive the interruption. “What’s up, Jinnie?”

“Where the fuck are you?” Hyunjin’s airy voice hissed into the phone and Eunbyeol jumped.

“What do you mean? I’m in the quad waiting for class?”

“We agreed to meet at the theater building so we could go in together and get a better chance at being partners for the semester.” Hyunjin’s pout could be heard through the phone.

“Yeah, and I’m going to go! Class isn’t for an hour.”

“You idiot! It’s literally 11:55 right now. Don’t tell me you were listening to that stupid radio show of yours again.”

“What! It’s not stupid! DJ Bbokdi really gets me! Today he played like three songs I’ve been obsessed with recently. Besides, I won’t be late, it’s only-” Eunbyeol checked the time on her phone. “Fuck!”

“I’m never going to speak to you again if I have to be stuck with some random person for the entire semester.”

“I thought Minho was taking this class, too?” Eunbyeol scrambled to gather her things, shoving her papers and books into her backpack unceremoniously while Jiho watched on.

“He had to switch out for his stage managing practicum. I think I have another friend who agreed to take it, but I don’t know if he got in! If that’s the case, I don’t want either of us to be stuck with some rando.” Hyunjin whined.

“Bye, Jiho-yah! I’ll see you at home!” Eunbyeol called to her friend, ignoring the ‘I told you so’ eyeroll that she was so famous for. “Relax, I’m on my way, I’ll be there soon.”

“It’s 11:56 now! If you’re late you owe me dinner. You’d better run!”

With nothing else, Hyunjin ended the call and Eunbyeol wasted no time in picking up the pace. While running she quickly navigated to the radio station app to see if Bbokdi ended his show yet. She fumbled as she ran, cussing under her breath the entire time. Eunbyeol shoved the earbud into her ear just in time to hear the last ten seconds.

“That’s it for me today, my friends! Be sure to tune into [Show] next week! Same time, same place. Now, I have to get to class. See you later!”

“Damn it...” Eunbyeol muttered, racing past the student center without getting the chance to peer in and see if she could see the mastermind at the switchboard.

Eunbyeol stumbled onto the radio show quite by accident. In her first semester, she’d found Jiho listening to it one day because Jisung recommended it to her. Something about DJ Bbokdi just made her heart all warm and before she knew it, she found herself listening every single week. He had the perfect voice for radio, smooth and enticing. And he was friendly and loving and such a wonderful person, truly the whole package. It was no wonder that most of the girls she met on campus always had something to say about DJ Bbokdi and his beautiful voice and beautiful personality. Surely, with a voice like that, he had to be good-looking.

The idea of being ‘just another fangirl’ was abhorrent and Eunbyeol winced at the mere thought. She wanted to be his friend somehow. He’d read a few of her confessions on-air and answered a question or two, but for some reason, it wasn’t enough. It didn’t feel like he was talking to her. Not exactly.

Eunbyeol couldn’t tell if the warmth in her chest was from the show this morning or the physical exertion of running down the path toward the theater building. She’d only agreed to take this stupid class for Hyunjin, who wanted it as one of his electives outside of his majors. The idiot was enrolled for two bachelor’s degrees and still found time to take asinine acting classes and he convinced her to do it with him. She needed a few electives herself, so she agreed. But... it wasn’t the only reason.

Her heart pounded as she made her way closer and closer to the building. She could see it, but he wasn’t standing outside. Hyunjin must have gone inside to secure a partner. The professor for this class did the same thing many professors did. They stuck you with a partner for a semester-long project where you had to equally contribute towards a mutual goal. It’s how she and Hyunjin got close, and how they wanted to stay close. Hyunjin was the perfect partner for her and she for him. It was no wonder why he wanted her to take this class with him. He didn’t want to be stuck with someone potentially unreliable. With that thought, Eunbyeol sped up.

Her phone pinged with a message and she winced, eyeing the preview on her screen as she ran. Hyunjin wasn’t going to wait for her to be late. Eunbyeol’s heart sank at the idea of running up to the building without seeing Hyunjin on the stairs. The only reason she ever liked being late was getting to see him waiting for her. She wished she could see that today: Hyunjin’s slender form leaning against a wall or a pillar and swiping aimlessly through his phone before looking up at her and smiling. She couldn’t decide what she would have missed more. The end of her radio show or her gorgeous best friend.

[Jinnie: Professor Min is beginning to dish out partners as a way of taking attendance. She hasn’t even read the syllabus yet. You’d better hurry!]

A new text from Hyunjin made her lungs claw for breath. Eunbyeol cussed under her breath as she started up the stairs toward the building. The theater building was tall and made of pristine glass. In the evenings, you could look in and see the sparkling chandeliers and ivory marble floors. Her senior showcase would be performed on the expansive stage and just the thought made the hair on the back of her neck stand to attention. She longed to leap and twirl on the hardwood under the lights.

She didn’t have time to stop and peer into the hall to appreciate the stage like she normally did. Eunbyeol wanted to dance there more than anything. Well, except for maybe getting to class on time.

[Jinnie: Just listen to your stupid radio show in the building next time... you’re too whipped for that guy.]

She would have to tell him off for that later. She didn’t have enough brain power to come up with a comeback, but thankfully she could give Hyunjin an earful after class. She wasn’t that whipped.

Eunbyeol gratefully rounded the corner and was glad to see the door to her classroom open. A few students hurried up and down the hallway to get to their respective classes, so at least she wasn’t alone. A boy several feet ahead of her slipped into her classroom and her heart swelled with a moment of camaraderie. At least she wouldn’t be the only one late to class. She glanced quickly at her watch to find that she was only three minutes late, so she might still be able to be partners with Hyunjin. Eunbyeol wasn’t sure she could survive this semester being partnered with anyone else.

“I’m sorry, Professor!” Eunbyeol gasped as she threw herself into the brightly lit classroom. She doubled over to suck in some deep breaths. “I lost track of time, please forgive me-”

“Look at that! It looks like you won’t have to be in a group of three. We’re back to an even number in the class!” Professor Min exclaimed, clasping her hands together.

Eunbyeol slowly straightened out and glanced through the room, her eyes finding Hyunjin as naturally as looking towards the light. Hyunjin sat near the back by the window and he stared at her with wide eyes. His jet-black hair was about as long as his chin but pulled back tastefully out of his eyes with a white ribbon. A few stray stands fell out to frame his slim face. His features were soft and elf-like, with a strong jawline and cheekbones but handsome eyes and lips. His thick eyebrows were furrowed together and he mouthed a few words at her through the classroom. She knew him well enough at this point to tell what he was saying.

“Where the hell were you, what happened?”

“Lost track of time! Who is that?”

Eunbyeol gestured vaguely to the random boy on Hyunjin’s left. He glanced over before scowling at Eunbyeol. She didn’t need to be told that the random kid was Hyunjin’s partner. She hoped he at least saved her a seat. Eunbyeol knew he’d be mad, but they’d have to talk about it after class.

“Oh, okay!” A voice at the front of the room exclaimed and Eunbyeol’s attention was ripped rather rudely from her best friend.

The boy who had slipped into the room before her stood at the front of the room by the professor. He wore a black hoodie, strange for the middle of August, and a black cap that had tufts of blond hair sticking out the bottom. His backpack sagged but his shoulders were straight and showed no strain from the weight. Something about him struck her as familiar, but she couldn’t seem to place him.

“Student? What is your name?” Professor Min, a tall and lithe woman with a long ponytail down her back, once again brought Eunbyeol’s attention back into the room.

“Ah... I’m Cha Eunbyeol.” she introduced herself with a deep bow, missing how the boy at the front tensed up the moment she spoke her name.

“Welcome Cha Eunbyeol! Please find a place to sit with your partner! Ah, please introduce yourselves.”

Eunbyeol rose back up just in time to have her world completely turned upside down. The blond boy turned around to greet her, his handsome face melting into a satisfied smirk that she knew all too well. She never thought in a million years that she would see him again after high school and, in fact, was banking on it. She wanted to forget her entire relationship with him but somehow, fate had brought them together again. She supposed it was her fault for not paying a lick of attention to him after the music video shoot before their senior year. How could she have known they chose the same goddamn university?

The boy took a step towards her and held his hand out to her. He stuffed his free hand into the pocket of his hoodie. Blond hair poked out of the cap he wore from all angles, curling around the back of his neck and flaring out around his perfectly shaped almond eyes. She almost wouldn’t have recognized him with the longer blond hair if she wasn’t hyper-aware of so many other parts of him. His soft hands, plush lips, perfectly angular nose and those beautiful freckles scattered along his cheeks.

If it wasn’t for his signature smirk and the obnoxious nickname he called her, she might not have recognized him at all. When he spoke, Eunbyeol’s jaw dropped and she found herself stuck to her place on the floor. His voice somehow got even lower and it reverberated through her and went right to the empty space between her legs.

“Hello, nice to meet you, Sweetheart.” He whispered the name under his breath so just she could hear it. “I’m Lee Felix. Let’s get along, shall we?”

Oh no... he got hot. Really, really hot.

~!~!~!~!~!~

EUNBYEOL TRIED TO pay attention to the syllabus in front of her, but she’d heard all of the boring stuff before. The professor droned on about things like classroom policy, school policy, and plagiarism for several minutes and Eunbyeol convinced herself that was why she wasn’t paying attention.

Same shit, different day.

Same shit, same guy, different day... different school. Eunbyeol’s jaw set as the thought about the unbelievably hot blond-haired boy sitting next to her. Thankfully, Hyunjin put his backpack on the seat to his right so she could sit there.

Hwang Hyunjin: Her dance partner, the most beautiful man she’d ever seen, her best friend, her crush. Whenever she saw him her heart leaped into her throat and she couldn’t believe that he actually liked her too. Even if he didn’t like her in a romantic sense, he liked her enough to hang out with her all the time and seek out being her partner for class projects. In fact, aside from Jiho, Eunbyeol thought she spent most of her time with Hyunjin and he spent most of his time with her. Not only that, but he was the best dance partner she’d ever had in her life. It was almost movie-like and stereotypical how well they worked with each other, most of the time predicting the other’s moves way before they did them.

“It’s your fault we’re like this.” Hyunjin leaned over to whisper in her ear.

“I know!” Eunbyeol wanted to scream, but she kept her voice as a harsh whisper. “You don’t have to remind me.”

“I would have been happy with either of you but now I have neither? Ridiculous.” Hyunjin rolled his eyes and leaned away, leaving Eunbyeol to wonder what he meant. She didn’t have time to ask before the professor finally spoke up about the project.

“Alright, and now the project!” Professor Min began. “You’ll see the details in the syllabus, but here’s the gist. Your final project will be a pair scene that we work on all semester. You have a couple of weeks to read a bunch of scenes and one-acts. Ideally, your performance will be between ten and twenty minutes. By the third week of class you will have chosen a scene with your partner, by midterms you will perform it once for the class and we will spend a few weeks workshopping each piece. Then, your final exam will be performing your piece at a showcase in the Black Box theater.”

“Oh god, are you sure you wanna take this class?” Eunbyeol whispered to Hyunjin, swallowing the lump in her throat.

“Of course I do. Come on, it’ll be fine!” He responded with a glint in his eye.

“In the meantime, while you all are working on your scenes, you will be doing weekly exercises with your partner.” Professor Min continued and the class groaned at her words. Everyone except... Lee fucking Felix. “These exercises will be in the most important thing you can have with anyone: trust. We will be doing various trust-building exercises in class and out of class for the next sixteen weeks. Every week I expect you to complete one of them and submit a reflection by Sunday at 11:59 pm. While I have some plans for in-class things, there is also a list of things you could do with your partner on the syllabus. There are more than sixteen so you are welcome to do more than that for a few points of extra credit. By the way, that will be the only extra credit I offer this semester. With that, let’s get into the grade breakdown...”

Eunbyeol flipped through to the page that listed all of the things she would have to do. Her eyes widened at the extensive list and nausea bubbled up within her at the thought of doing these things with Lee Felix. Hold hands for thirty minutes... stare into each other's eyes for twenty minutes... cook a meal together... read to each other...

What is this bullshit?

She glanced over at Felix who, like her, was perusing the list. However, he had a delighted smile plastered onto his soft features, making his eyes sparkle in the bright natural light. Felix, the last person Eunbyeol expected to see much less be paired with, looked over at her and balanced his chin with the palm of his hand. He smiled warmly at her. Her heart flip-flopped in her chest.

How obnoxious... ly hot.

“Alright, class. I am going to pass out your first pair assignment now.” Professor Min handed a stack of paper to a student in the front, who took one and passed it down. “On this page, there are three questions you’re going to ask your partner. Simple things, nothing too much. Write down their answers and on the back write a brief paragraph about first impressions. Once you’re done, you can leave for the day and we will start learning about genres in the next class. If you have any questions let me know.”

The room burst into conversation immediately. Eunbyeol glanced over at Hyunjin to see about talking to him instead of her partner, but he seemed to be invested in his. Eunbyeol then turned to look at Felix, who was already looking her up and down with an obnoxiously perfect smile on his face. Slowly, Felix leaned forward to whisper in her ear, sending chills down her spine involuntarily.

“I can’t wait to work on this project with you! I’m sure we’ll have a great time.” Felix shot her a wink and she scowled in response.

“As if!”

“Come on, it’s the perfect chance to catch up. We haven’t seen each other since high school!”

“Yes, and there is a very good reason for that.” Eunbyeol hissed.

“Here-” Felix produced a pen out of his bag and leaned over to scribble something on her syllabus. She tried to wrench her papers away from him, but his veiny hand kept them in place effortlessly. “When you decide you’d like to do well in this class, shoot me a text. Or, actually... you should give me your number, you probably won’t text me first.”

“What?” Eunbyeol blinked in surprise when Felix tilted his pen toward her and moved his syllabus closer.

“Sweetheart, like I’m sure you’re thinking right now, we’re stuck doing this together. Some of these dumb exercises are things we have to pre-plan, so we should talk about what we want to do. If you won’t give it to me, I’ll just get it from Hyunjin.” Felix rolled his eyes, taking a page from the stack handed to him before offering it to her. She took a page and passed it over her shoulder to Hyunjin. She didn’t miss how Hyunjin’s long fingers brushed over her own. “God, these questions are dumb. Let’s get this over with.”

“Fuck this,” Eunbyeol muttered, grabbing a pen from her backpack. She leaned over and wrote her digits on his paper before huffing and looking at the page. After reading the questions, she glanced up at Felix.

In high school, his eyes seemed to shimmer in the light and it was no different now. However, it was somewhat reassuring that he wasn’t exactly thrilled to see her either. On that, at least, Eunbyeol knew they could agree. Felix rolled his eyes, leaned back in his chair, and read off the first question to her. He ran his tongue along the inside of his cheek in annoyance. He glanced over the page at her and heaved a sigh.

Why is he hot even when he’s mad?!

“This is gonna be a long fucking semester, isn’t it?”

~!~!~!~!~!~

“Student Name: Cha Eunbyeol.

Partner Name: Lee Felix

Question 1: Why are you taking this class?

Answer: My (our?) best friend asked him to take it. It’s not in his major, but he said he didn’t want to be alone. They’re not partners now so I guess it didn’t work out.

Question 2: Three interesting facts about yourself?

Answer: One... He likes nutella toast way too much, I think it’s a problem. Two, he’s a music production major. Three, his favorite color is black.

Question 3: What is it that you hope to get out of this class?

Answer: Of course, he said friendship. He loves meeting new people and learning new things and he really thinks that this class will help him to learn how to develop relationships and work with difficult people to work towards a common goal.

Reflection: Professor, PLEASE let me switch partners. If anyone else is unhappy with their partner, I will HAPPILY switch with them. I know all of this is about trust but I wouldn’t even trust Lee Felix to spell his own name correctly, much less do the work. I do not like him and I don’t think we will be a good fit for this project. I’m scared of what will happen if I’m associated with him. What if... what if I don’t hate him?”

“Wow, Eunbyeol-ssi, it sounds like you have to learn to trust people a little more! The fact that you and him seem to clash is the exact reason I do this project every semester. Stick it out and all will be well! -Professor Min”

“Student Name: Lee Felix

Partner Name: Cha Eunbyeol

Question 1: Why are you taking this class?

Answer: Her best friend (also my best friend! Small world!) Hyunjin wanted her to take it so they could be partners for the project. They actually work well together. Also... this fills an elective requirement.

Question 2: Three interesting facts about yourself?

Answer: One: She hates the color black, she prefers blue. Two: She’s at KNU on a scholarship and if she drops this class, she’ll probably lose it. So, lucky for me Eunbyeol is stuck here. Three: She really likes to dance. (I knew that already, but she wouldn’t change her answer.)

Question 3: What is it that you hope to get out of this class:

Answer: She hopes to get out of this class alive. (Sorry, she didn’t give me a better answer before she left.)

Reflection: Honestly, we knew each other in high school but she hasn’t changed much. She likes things done her way and she really doesn’t like me. Unfortunately for her, I think she’s great and I’m super excited to get to work with her on this. I really hope that some of these trust exercises will help bring us a little closer together. If anything, I just want to be her friend. Chances are, she’ll be dramatic about it for a few weeks and then she’ll do it.”

“Felix-ssi, you have your hands full! Normally I wouldn’t share this, but she asked to switch partners. If things were bad, I would allow it. However, it sounds to me like you really care for her and you want to put in the work to do the project and to build your relationship with Eunbyeol. I’ll be rooting for you! -Professor Min”

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nicosavior456 · 4 months

Note

hello! I would like a Percy Jackson matchup! Romantic matchup and how we met + cabin + weapon + platonic relationship

Name: Anna Lee

Pronouns: She/her

Preference: Male

Age range: Any

Personality: I am an INTJ Slytherclaw, Aquarius and a Type 6 when it comes to anagrams. I am a huge overthinker and stress a lot with anxiety. People tell me that I can be blunt which results in people thinking that I can be cold but in reality I try to be a kind person when it is needed. I am a realist and many consider me to be intelligent, often asking me to help with their work. I’m incredibly passionate about things I like to do and have a thirst to know everyone’s opinions as I feel that if someone is left out. I’m a creative person but sometimes my brain just goes blank, I hate when it does. I sometimes follow the rules and can be serious if I wish to be but normally I like to goof off and break rules, adrenaline rushing through my body is just a different feeling I can’t explain. I have a really dry sense of humour that usually is a mix of sarcasm, fandom jokes or self degrading jokes. I'm an extremely stubborn person and have to be right about everything. From a young age, my parents were extremely strict and had expected the best out of me which resulted in me being an overachiever. I have to get things perfect or be the best at what I’m doing. I'm really sensitive, even some small harsh words are enough to make me teary. I’ve been called a crybaby because of that and to be honest, that is true. I give too much to other people since I’m afraid of saying no since what if they hate me? And I'm too scared to ask for help or to have something cause I think they will think I'm selfish and worthless. Not the best self esteem 😔 I love to listen to other people since I think not a lot of people have others that they can tell what they wish to say without getting judged or outcasted. When I get excited, I speak really quickly and stumble over my words which I get embarrassed by and stop talking. I have a rosy view of how the world works—or more specifically, of the people I love. Like sometimes I point out the negative things in life but when with other people, especially those I love, I always see the goodness and beauty in everything. I am very sensitive, especially when it comes to my appearance and personality. I’m always afraid that people are constantly judging me or hate me, which is why I tend to avoid public spaces or being around people in general. When I get familiar with someone or a crowd, I’m not that afraid to state my opinion. I’m not that good at describing personality but here are a few kins if it is helpful : Navier, Mikasa, Regulus Black, Annabeth, Shinobu, Shoko ( Jjk), Geto etc.

Looks: Half-Korean and Half- White. I’m slightly chubby and curvy with a pear-shaped body (D cups). Upon seeing me, many people point out my eyes which are hazel with slight flecks of many colours such as green and amber being the prominent ones. Almond eyes that are doe-like and slightly turn up at the end but barely noticeable. I have a button nose and thin heart shaped lips. My face is round and my eye shape is almond. I am approximately 5’3. Two small moles are fixated on my right cheek and underneath my lip. Long dark brown hair that almost appears black but that solely depends on the lighting. My hair reaches my hips and is kinda wispy at the end. It’s usually on a ponytail with a few strands framing my face. My clothing style tends to be anything comfortable and classy. I prefer to wear black and colours that are darker, you will never find me wearing orange or neon colours. My clothing always consists of a dress of some sort. Light Academia mixed with cottagecore. Not really afraid to show some skin but I do get shy easily so there is a certain limit.

Likes: Chocolate, Anime, Music, Food, Being right about something, Reading, Drawing, Strawberries, Smell of Rain, Sleeping, Being the Best, Baking, Daydreaming, Murder Mysteries, Romance , Fiction, Name hunting, Pinterest and Flower Languages.

Dislike: Loud noises, Jerks, Prejudice People, Slow Walkers, People who chew loudly, Getting look down on, Insects, Studying, Fake People, Self-pity, Getting below 90% in a test, Coffee, Snow, Going outside, and the feeling where your brain is blank and can’t tell what you feel like.

Love Language: Physical Touch and Quality Time

Ideal Type: Preferred dark hair and pretty eyes. I don’t know, I’m just soft with Tsunderes. Will always be there for me and not afraid to speak their mind. Honest and loyal. Someone I can call her best friend, I can be weird around them and they won’t mind at all,Yet they would still help me see the light at the end of the tunnel and tell me it’s okay, that everything is gonna be okay. I wouldn’t like ‘innocent’ people nor ‘kind’ people cause I feel like I won’t be able to connect with them based on my morality level. Someone who’s taller than me for sure, it gives me a sense of calm. I find brooding people hot cause I like testing people’s patience. Will be attentive to my needs. Not necessarily loud but not quite, somewhere in between. I want someone who I can feel okay around, as if everything was fine. Someone who would help carry a burden with me, we are together in everything. A type of person who would wait for me when I’m tying my shoelaces. But like they wouldn’t mind teasing me at points but do understand their limits so I don’t end up crying my eyes out. Also as that one audio goes “I wanna big boy, give me a big boy ~” I can so agree.

Also, if you answer this request would it be possible to leave out this info in the reblogged answer? I would really prefer that to be used only for making the match-up

thank you!

I think the best pjo guy could be Alasbaster Torrington.

Alabaster has your perfer appearance and personality, with brooding green eye and dark brown hair.

He has magic powers and is a good analyst.

He could support your creative ideas and passions.

He is more of a rebel and will call out corrupt authority.

You could teach him to move one from the past and could help him be playful

#pjo #alabaster torrington

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riverdale-retread · 11 months

Text

Riverdale S7 E6 Peep Show.

The episode opens with Jughead in bed reading comic books with the editorial condemning those same comic books. This is the second or third time they’ve shown Jughead Jones in his tight-fitting long johns in bed, reading. Is this- is this supposed to be fanservice for the Jughead girlies? (Of which I admit I am one). But I mean, Is it? The only other character I can recall who was regularly shown in this sort of underwear is Goofy from Disney. This is an odd choice, because so much of this episode revolves around showing bodies and how best to showcase them in underwear.

Anyway, as Jughead reads a Pep Comic issue which seems to be titled “Things [of?] Darkness,” he is suddenly reminded of something written by his “favorite pulp writer of all time, Brad Rayberry.” He picks up a volume of November County and Other stories by the same author, looking very concerned.

Immediately, he runs over to the publishing house to yell at his publisher about being a plagiarist. Jughead always does this in every universe - oh I’m suddenly sad I won’t be able to say this anymore after this season! Sob! - when he has a suspicion: He goes straight to the suspected perpetrator of whatever the crime or misdeed is and confronts then forthwith, but without any sort of plan as to what he’ll do if they deny it, which they invariably do, or how he will cope with the consequences of launching such a frontal attack. Betty and Archie are physically reckless, but Jughead is existentially reckless.

His publisher says that plagiarism is a word they don’t use at the publishing house (which is such a great side step. Did Mr. Publisher have a former career as a lawyer?) Then he makes up a story about how he tried to reach out to the proper author but then conveniently presumed said author was dead based on the lack of response. Which doesn’t justify plagiarism but he seems to think it does.

We are with Archie as he, along with me, tries to endure the unwelcome imposition that Uncle Frank is in his house. I’ve always despised Uncle Frank, and honestly, them showing me that he would have been even worse in the 1950s does not make me hate any iteration of him less by one iota. Archie is trying to fix his car, but Frank says he is “concerned.” He lays out all of Archie’s flaws, which are that he is a middling student, lying, not pulling his weight around the house, and the “business with the Blossom girl.”

Sir? Sir! I object. The lying & business with the Blossom girl was the exact opposite of a concerning lie, is it not? It turns out both are still technically virgins, which is what you all probably care most about, and he did it to save her and he went along with you all trying to force him to get married at 17! Anyway, Frank is a right piece of shit, because he pokes at Archie’s grief with “How do you think your dad would feel?”

Well sir, Archie may not know this but since I watched all previous seasons of Riverdale with close attention several times over, I know exactly how Fred would feel, and he indeed would feel proud of Archie. That was kind of Fred’s problem - even when he was annoyed at Archie, he was never less than proud.

Apparently, Frank was present when Fred took his leave of Archie to go “off to war” because he knows what the instructions were - “Take care of Mom and be the man of the house.”

I would have been much happier if Frank had died in the Korean War, and I’m sure Archie agrees. I’m also pretty sure that Fred DID NOT MEAN to burden his actual child with this sort of thing. He was trying to give his child something else to focus on rather than worry daily about his father 8,000 miles away. Frank as far as I can tell has no family of his own, so again, this business of childless men lecturing about or at other people’s children? Bah humbug, honestly. Maybe this is my being raised intensely Catholic while female, but honestly, this type of man should simply never ever say anything at all about children, child bearing, reproduction and so on.

So Archie, looking like he has a gun pointed to the back of his head (which is Frank staring into it like a psycho) apologizes to his mother about not being a ‘better son.’ I’m also back to very much disliking Mary Andrews. She is a bad mom. Why would you farm out actually raising your kid to FRANK of all people? Ugh. WHAT KIND OF MOTHER HAVE YOU BEEN MARY ANDREWS? Have you thought about that?? She’s been weak as shit against people like the Blossoms, arbitrary & unpredictable in her rule enforcement and generally a shitty parent.

Next door, Betty is sadly getting ready for school. I want to look inside Betty’s closet this season. She alway has a perfectly color coordinated belt or scarf (sometimes the same color, sometimes a wonderful contrast color) to go with her outfit. She looks across the way and is completely verklempt at the view of Archie’s moist abs, fresh from the shower. The music can’t possibly be 1950s- there’s synths and stuff. The song says “I feel so…. GOOOD.’ I can’t relate, but her vision is so good that she is capable of focusing on his happy trail from a whole house away. If only we all looked as pretty as she does (I LOVE the Grace kelly type hairdo she has happening) while agog with lust.

At school, in the locker room, the girls are putting on their gym outfits. What sort of sports can you play in outfits like these, by the way? Stiff yellow button down shirts with puffy sleeves tucked into high waisted bermuda shorts that barely cover your butt cheeks? These shorts are even belted tight at the waist.

In the sweetest, most kittenish way possible, Betty asks Veronica, “What’s sex like?”

…. I mean. OK. Lemme breathe. Because that was so like, the perfect delivery for a very by-the-books porno, no? Gorgeous blonde horny girl goes “What’s sex like?” while leaning forward, blinking winsomely with huge eyes. And she’s not even aware of the effect she has. What is GOING ON.

So Veronica is understandably shocked (hc: turned on and not out to herself) (Why is TONI not picking up on these vibes to invite Veronica for a cuppa at the Dark Room already? Is this because they are both tops??) but only gently says that it’s a bit early in the morning for this sort of talk (“I’ve barely just had my morning java!”). What happens next is a huge part of why I adore Veronica Lodge above all girls but especially Betty (who, even if not this season, is for plot reasons not all that big on truth telling): She meets truth and candor with truth and candor. When Betty says she doesn’t know what sex is like and would like to hear, which is a pretty brave thing to ask someone, Veronica responds with the same attitude to confess that she herself is still a virgin. Betty has the absolute perfect come-back: I just assumed because you’re just so sexy! Betty really knows how to talk to a girl!

I suppose the idea is that the 1950s were a super repressed time in America (which I don’t think it actually was in actuality but OK) such that even the sensual Veronica Lodge is - gasp! - still a virgin but actually since this is reflective of my own high school experience I found it very comforting to have it represented on the screen. “You don’t have to have sex to be sexy,” is what Veronica says.

Betty would like advice on how to carry herself more like Veronica. Veronica suggests perfume and heels, then brings out the idea of sexy lingerie. “Soft fabric against my skin” is what she says as some horny trumpeteer goes “Wah wah Waaaaah” in the background. OK so I guess I’ve tried out the wrong kinds of lingerie because that shit was itchy as fuck. Veronica walks her fingers flirtatiously up Betty’s arm as she says, “Say, why don’t you give lingerie a twirl?” Betty looks very turned on, first just by the purring way Veronica is talking about being sexy, second about the idea of Veronica in lingerie that makes her already perfect body “look fantastic” and about doing something sexual with Veronica. I mean possibly also I guess she is excited about having a guide to learn about lingerie but that’s like below tertiary. Betty is going to go over to Veronica’s later to try on her used underwear (which I find a strange idea but ok).

At the student lounge, Cheryl approaches Toni to give her the lesbian pulp novel back. Cheryl insists on calling her “Antoinette.” I am insane for all these fabulous belts these girls are all wearing this season. I love the gloss on the red patent leather one that Cheryl is sporting. When asked what she thinks about the lesbian pulp classic (the real world version of which was one of the rare ones where neither woman died for being gay at the end), she responds to the cover art using very distant artsy language as in, Cheryl finds “two voluptuous, feminine forms in close proximity to each other” quite pleasant. Toni pulls out her go-to pick up line for Riverdale girls: She asks the girl to go to the Dark Room for a coffee. See, I knew Toni was trying to put the moves on Betty when she was consoling her after the dumping of Kevin!

Cheryl refuses - “Oh I couldn’t *possibly!” - and that’s because she’s too busy “relaunching the Vixens.” She needles Toni about finding cheerleading “far too square,” essentially daring her to try out for the squad.

The hostage situation with Archie and Uncle Fucking Frank continues, this time at the Principal’s office. Uncle Fucking Frank is still standing executioner distance behind Archie. Archie is trying to do everything with his face to signal that he is not ok, please help, while saying what his abductor wants him to say: “I wanna be at least a B student.” His principal is too dim to catch these hints, and anyway he’s probably turned on by the weird dominance thing that he’s witnessing right this minute. It turns out Uncle Fucking Frank is in cahoots with this asshole, the principal, enough to have private conversations with him!

At the tryouts for the cheerleading squad, Cheryl is holding court. Evelyn Evernever is there! She’s already a cheerleader. Welcome back Evelyn! I hope you’re unhinged and evil in this world too!

Toni bursts in like Aragorn, pushing the double doors wide open. The song playing in the soundtrack (probably in Cheryl’s head) states: It’s Too Darn Hot as Toni smugly makes her slo-mo entrance looking, actually, Too Darn Hot. Cheryl is so happy to see Toni, and is extra happy because she put on her blazing red lipstick just in case Toni showed up (she had more of a nude lip earlier in the day for their initial encounter). She’s also forbidden Evenlyn from wearing her reddish hair down, lol. Evelyn condescendingly tells Toni that she’s not “on the list” so she can’t try out, but Cheryl overrules her (because it’s never a cheerocracy!).

The two lesbians smile adoring at each other. Something about just breathing the air with Toni on her home ground (as a cheerleader) makes Cheryl glow like a Renaissance angel. Toni actually has a routine prepared, and we go to it. Cheryl watches all of Toni’s tryout routine in a totally horny haze, slowing it down in her mind as she almost drools. The song is also egging her on - something something “Refill the cup with my baby tonight” and “I’d like to sup with my baby tonight” etc which are all statements about cunnilingus. The room gets all dark for her. She doesn’t have the orgasm (of the mind) that she did the first time she watched Toni do a dance routine, but it’s close. Cheryl says this whole performance “razzed her berries.” This means looking at Toni made her nips tingle. Then she adds that “I haven’t seen pompom technique like that in years” which means she can tell Toni is (like all dykes) great with her hands.

Evelyn is making a very sour face behind her. Somehow Cheryl knows this, so she says since she “alone” speaks for the Vixens, she immediately offers Toni a spot on the team. Evelyn tries to make a case for procedural fairness only to get screamed at. The other girls all welcome Toni to the team.

At the dinner table, Uncle Fucking Frank makes a terrible announcement. “It looks like I’m going to be sticking around for a while.” Oh no. OH NO. Why? Because Principal Featherhead asked him “to be the basketball team’s head coach.” I’m horrified. Also Frank is short and stocky. I know zip about sports but isn’t basketball for tall lean people?

So Uncle Fucking Frank has no family - not even a lady - and no kids and he just moved into his brother’s widow’s house to bully his nephew, and because all this is not enough, he begged his way into getting a job at this nephew’s school. “Asked me” my ass What the fuck is his fixation on Archie?

Archie understandably says he doesn’t want to play basketball while Frank is gonna be coach. Not playing is not a way out of the Uncle Fucking Frank close contact - if Archie won’t play, then he can be waterboy. What is happening? I hate Mary so much. See, I knew, I KNEW that my being OK with Mary Andrews was not going to last. Why the fuck did she even have this child? Ugh.

At Veronica’s, Betty is feeling shy about showing how she looks in Veronica’s underwear, though she wasn’t shy about wearing Veronica’s underwear to begin with. Did they go shopping? Is this NEW underwear? Be that as it may, Veronica looks very eager on the bed, quaffing mimosas, and eating chocolates. When Betty finally emerges, Veronica’s eyes light up. “I knew it would look perfect on you!” The problem is, Betty feels embarrassed, which Veronica doesn’t understand. Looking like Bettie Page exactly, Veronica says, “Bettie Page herself would go ape for you.” Bettie Page’s personal orientation was not, uh, lesbian so that is a weird thing to say, Veronica. Just say you want to fuck Betty. Even though Betty looks close to tears, Veronica wants to keep looking at her, so makes her come in front of the mirror so she can keep looking at her under the guise of giving her some sort of sexual koan: “I am a gorgeous, powerful, sexy siren, at the height of my womanly powers.” I mean, this is very sweet, but I did have a flashback to Hannah Gadsby going - *I* am in my prime!! *I* am in my prime!! - meaning her 40-something self. The koan does work on Betty though, who is actually persuaded by the end.

Jughead has straight up gone to see the author Rayberry. He introduces himself as a writer at Pep Comics, then bluntly says “they’re ripping you off.” Rayberry wants to know why Jughead wants him to sue his own employer. Jughead is full on fangirling - “I think you’re the tops.” Even though Rayberry just wants to get rid of him, Jughead won’t take no for an answer, and even though the author looks slovenly while he keeps slamming the door in his face, he doesn’t give up.

Evelyn has given Cheryl a visit, to say that she is “uncomfortable” with Toni being on the squad not because she’s black (sure?) but because she’s “a lezzie.” I mean, it’s probably a bit of both right? Cheryl shuts down both objections - Riverdale has been fully integrated, and Toni Topaz is not… that, so Evelyn needs to “put an egg in your shoe and beat it.” That is the weirdest way to say that I’ve ever heard. I kinda like it. Cheryl wants to watch her show which is Oh Mija!

At the Dark Room, Toni is taunted for becoming a “paper shaker” by the Lezzie Lizzo, who is sporting a beret with a studded Serpents jacket. Lizzo mocks her for “still birddogging that redheaded closet case.” Toni tries to cover it up with some sort of sanctimonious bullshit - she is now the first ever black cheerleader at Riverdale. I’m with Lizzo - I don’t believe her one bit. “Oh so it’s *political* for you! [Much scoffing, then completely insincerely] Yeah I got it. That makes sense.” But Lizzo says she understands Toni Topaz for knuckling under the white patriarchy’s demeaning demands for women in the interests of getting access to Cheryl’s pussy. She says it nicer than me AND she acknowledges that Cheryl is very hot. “That’s one cherry lollipop I’d happily lick.”

I knew Lizzo was a good egg the first time I saw her. Why o why won’t Toni give her a chance? And what does Lizzo do all day? How old is she? Is she a high school drop out?? Can I have more Lizzo and much less Evelyn???

The next morning, Archie discovers that Uncle Fucking Frank has confiscated his car, to be returned to him when his “grades are where they should be.” This is because Uncle Fucking Frank is obsessed with Archie, leading to his wanting to spend every possible moment with him, including the ride to school.

Veronica is super excited to approach Betty the same morning to ask her exactly what kind of underwear she is wearing. This is extremely heterosexual behavior among women, right? Oh, and Veronica acknowledges that the ‘lingerie’ type underwear is neither silky nor comfortable (I mean granted, I haven’t ever tried the like, thousand-dollars a pop La Perla stuff so maybe those are??) - “How will ever get used to lace panties if you don’t wear them every day?” she chastises when it turns out Betty hasn’t put them on today for fear of being seen in them and being thought a “nymphomaniac.”

THIS FEAR IS SPECIFICALLY KEVIN FUCKING KELLER’S FAULT. I HATE YOU SO MUCH KEVIN.

Veronica thinks this whole “nympho” talk was invented by misogynist (gay) men to hurt women. I agree. She also diagnoses Betty with “needing a man.” Usually, this sort of comment is not true about the woman about whom it is said, but Betty actually does need a man. She is SO horny.

Betty tells Veronica that she has her eye on Archie. Veronica doesn’t like it, but she prioritizes Betty’s well being over her own, so rushes her to speak to Archie before Betty can “talk yourself out of it” by which Veronica means “myself.”

Archie is bent over a book in the student lounge. While Veronica listens from her hidden vantage point (with Betty’s awareness), Betty, her big bambi eyes brimming with adoration, asks Archie out on a movie date. Archie actually tells her the truth - he’d love to, but he can’t because of Uncle Fucking Frank. Veronica’s face falls when he says he’d love to, then brightens when he says he can’t. Betty doesn’t believe Archie though, at all. She thinks she’s being rejected.

She cries about it on Veronica’s shoulder, who continues to say the right and decent thing - that what Archie said might be the truth. Cheerful now that they have both been apparently rejected by Archie, Veronica suggests that they both find some airheads down at Stonewall Prep to play with. Betty cheerfully agrees to this plan.

At basketball practice, Julian is being a piece of shit to Archie who is trying to appease Uncle Frank because his mother is blind to the abuse he’s being subjected to. Why would you leave a child in the care of a childless middle aged uncle? Mary Andrews makes me so mad.

Evelyn Evernever, looking very ginchy in the ginchiest outfit (I love the 50s cheerleader uniform - cream sweater, navy skirt), breaks into Toni’s locker, immediately finding the lesbian book. She gets caught red-handed, but is brazen enough to try to confront Toni about her lesbianism. Cheryl denied it, she tells her. Toni threatens her with violence, then insists that Evelyn tell her exactly what Cheryl said.

At the comic publisher’s, Jughead is getting to see his name in print. He is so pleased - “It’s so boss, Boss!” - and being really adorable about it. (By the way, is this a throwback to the comics? Was Jughead in the comics just always off in his own world like this?). With perfect timing, Rayberry, all dressed up in his confrontation suit, bursts in, demanding to know who Fieldstone is. He launches into an angry speech about suing Pep Comics for plagiarism. Jughead jumps in to mediate, and this middle aged man and old man let him do this. The author and publisher shake hands on compensating Rayberry for the plagiarized stories. For his troubles, Jughead gets to have a dinner date with his favorite pulp writer at his favorite diner. Right off the bat, Rayberry even hints that he might ask for Jughead to be the one to adapt his stories going forward for the comics. Jughead just gushes to the man about how he loves his stories in “all the different pulp magazines” then proceeds to list all of them: Weird Tales, Startling Stories, Fantastic Adventures. He looks so happy - he can’t stop smiling. It’s so cute.

Then Rayberry asks whether his father approves of these literary aspirations. Across all universes, terrible Faifather FP is a fail, because the light immediately dims in Jughead’s face. Rayberry causally says his own father didn’t approve of his “literary aspirations” but Jughead simply doesn’t know. And in addition to inflicting me with Uncle Fucking Frank again, Riverdale fails me additionally but not killing off FP. Riverdale, girl, why? So even in this universe created by his angelic girlfriend, Jughead is abandoned by his father yet again. Rayberry tells him to write about his trauma from paternal abandonment. When Jughead asks if Rayberry would be willing to read his more literary attempt, Rayberry sighs and says “Oh, and we were having such a swell time.” Jughead fully looks like he is going to break apart into sad, salty-tear soaked little pieces at this apparent rejection until Rayberry says he was joking, that of course he’d be happy to read Jughead’s efforts, and they laugh about it.

OK so this is why Jughead is so disinterested in girls and Veronica and so on. He is in too much pain from his father. He is in desperate need of a father figure, but Fred Andrews who served that function in the other universe is gone (and possibly didn’t even meet Jughead in this world, since he never met Cheryl either), other male authority figures are all non-starters (Dupont hates him, the principal hates him, Sheriff Keller is a moron, Clifford Blossom is evil, Uncle Fucking Frank is himself), and his publisher/editor who served this role for him in the other universe acts just as exploitative towards Jughead as FP does so he’s no appropriate either. And Riverdale’s main narrative arc - the Jugular Vein, if you will - is that Jughead Jones Cannot Get What He Wants, so we should know by now that this business with Rayberry will never work out.

The song that plays in the transition to the next scene is “Lead Me Father.” This show and its song choices! We cut to Archie doing child labor for Uncle Fucking Frank in the gym. he takes a break to handle a basketball. I don’t know this song, but it says things like “Pick Me Up When I Stumble, So the World Won’t Know.” I guess basketball is tied to his father’s death for Archie somehow, which is why he doesn’t want to play it anymore, especially not with Uncle Fucking Frank as the goddamn coach. Also I don’t know whose daddy is like this but if your daddy is like this, let me just say, Wow you are lucky.

This is intercut with Jughead trying to write about his father, as the lyrics gravely intone about “Give me the strength for a song.” He picks up a photo of a man who is not the FP we know, sitting scowling on a bike. The singer croons that he wants to help some “poor troubled weary worker along.” Jughead’s face goes through complicated set of emotions - he misses his dad, he’s bitter about his abandonment, and above all, he’s very very sad. Jughead Jones’s tears of heartbreak are always just under the surface, which is why he keeps not wanting to be here in his reality and (doubling down on my thesis) he resents it when people are emotionally secure enough to try to take a risk to make their lives even better (like, you know, get laid with a sexy person to share a good time).

The next morning, Uncle Fucking Frank unilaterally tells Archie that he now has a job at the Diner, pumping gas. This seems like a really specifically american thing, to overload one’s kids - Archie, who is not bright and also not that interested in school and not given very good brains by his very stupid mother, is supposed to get his grades up but also perform slave labor for the basketball team and further perform child labor at the gas pump all at the same time. This is not how that works. (Listen to your bespectacled East Asian -I know what I”m talking about.)

Meanwhile, Jughead is showing off his Homeroom of Horrors Pep Comics issue, written by JUGHEAD JUGULAR JONES. His friends want to celebrate with burgers. Jughead tells them he has a meeting with Rayberry at his house. He’s so happy.

Toni confronts Cheryl about telling Evelyn that Toni isn’t gay. She completely glosses over Cheryl saying they have a “big problem” about MIDGE. Toni says she’s not ashamed of who she is or who she likes and should not be considered someone to be rescued. Cheryl backs down immediately, answering in a soft voice that she doesn’t know what Toni wants Cheryl to say. Cheryl apologizes, so Toni says that she’s had enough of pursuing Cheryl. And that turns out to be the key thing, because the prospect of losing Toni’s attention altogether is what makes Cheryl gin up the courage to say, out loud, using her voice, to another person that she is attracted to girls.

Atta girl Cheryl!

“And I think maybe I’m attracted to you!” Cheryl says, starting to cry. Toni is merciless, and wants her to actually confess - that Cheryl KNOWS she is attracted to Toni.

Jughead is at the Rayberry apartment, which looks really familiar to me. Is it the Toni/Fangs Throuple Cursed Apartment with Fucking Kevin?? Or is it Jughead and Tabitha’s apartment?? (The windows are too different.) Rayberry says he’s willing to read Jughead’s writing, then offers him tea, which Jughead accepts. Jughead is a bad guest because opens a closed box and steals a manuscript with a working title that I don’t catch the reference to because I never do. Jughead straight up steals the manuscript. Plagiarism and manuscript theft are apparently big themes for Jughead (sometimes the manuscript is a computer file), but I am not clear on what the theme is supposed to say, yet... this was very ill judged of him.

Meanwhile, Cheryl and Toni are on their first date, kind of, during which Toni takes it upon herself to out both Kevin and Clay, even though she says Cheryl isn’t supposed to talk about it with other people. This does not seem like a very good beginning. Cheryl in this universe has an aunt Carol, who moved to Greenwich Village to be a lesbian and a writer. “A sapphic sexual deviant” according to Penelope. Carol apparently gets to live loving women. Toni is bisexual in this world too, but it was only a problem when she made out with girls. Her grandmother is for some reason absolutely accepting of Toni being queer. Cheryl says that her family will only accept her if she plays her role correctly. She’s now ready for something else, so Toni holds her hand.

Archie is working at night, and of course Julian oozes up to get his tank filled. Inside the Diner, Bee and Vee are on a date with one dark haired and one light haired WASP boy each from the private school. Betty is bored as fuck by her date. Pop brings a thermos of coffee to Archie. Archie says that Fred used to play basketball with him all the time, when Pops says Fred was a legendary basketball player. Pops says Fred was a true American hero. Archie agrees, looking genuinely happy for the first time

Jughead has stayed up all night reading Rayberry’s “Jupiter Journals” manuscript that he stole when he was personally invited to that man's house AND imposed on him to read his vomit draft. Jughead! Why are you like this! For some reason, he is not in his skin tight Goofy long-johns. Instead he is in the patented slutty Jughead Jones tank top over striped pajamas. Does this mean something? Or is this the underwear and loungewear that Veronica got for him when she redid his traincar? Jughead says the book is “like Flash Gordon if Fitzgerald had written it.” I have no idea what Flash Gordon is. Jughead in his inappropriate way, because he is so love-starved, immediately decides to confront Rayberry about shoving his light under a bushel or something, not cognizant of the fact that having stolen the manuscript is going to have bad consequences.

At school, Veronica wants to know what happened with the preppy that walked Betty home, which was a big nothing. There was no spark because Betty wants to sleep with Archie and nobody else. She says this means she’s doomed since he turned her down flat. Veronica says Romeo & Juliet had “logistical problems but they figured it out.”

And for the first time in seven years, at the THIRD Romeo & Juliet mention (Jughead calling Betty Juliet, Toni calling Fangs and Midge Romeo & Juliet and now Veronica) someone finally says the correct thing: “Veronica, they both DIED.”

Bless Veronica though because she knows something about Romeo & Juliet, so she retorts: “Not until Act 5 and only after they lost their cherries.”

Is this foreshadowing? Is this how this sojourn to 1955 is going to end??

Veronica has an idea. She says that Barchie should have long meaningful late night conversations to get close to Archie.

She also uses the word “gatekeeping.” Earlier on she used the term “gaslighting” about the purpose of the word “nymphomaniac.” Is the slow breaking down of the world of 1955 as created by Tabitha Tate? Why is Veronica using 2020s lingo like this in her 50s universe?

Betty said she’d love to, but she knows Archie doesn’t have a phone in his room. Veronica is so smart - she immediately gets to the heart of the matter. “You can look into ARchie’s bedroom window through yours?” she asks. She wants to know immediately if Betty has seen Archie [dot dot dot] and I’m choosing to understand this as “naked” to which Betty says, sounding very much like she really needs a vibrator, “Yes. Many, MANY times!” Veronica wants in on the peep show.

Inside the school, Julian Blossom is really asking for it, calling Archie a grease monkey to complain about the car service, then calls him waterboy and to get him to fetch a soda. Julian then takes the name of God, I mean Fred, in vain, saying he’s going to obliterate Fred’s record since Archie’s not going to be the one. Archie pushes him, Julian pushes back, then Archie punches him right in the face.

What was the casting requirement for Julian Blossom? Have a punchable face? Because he’s now been socked in the face by no less than Ethel, then Jughead, and now Archie.

It is Archie’s explosion into violence that makes Mary spring into action. I don’t have kids but this is bad parenting, right? Like, she’s doing all the things wrong. Mary only reacts meaningfully when Archie is violent, like today. She finally womans up enough to tell Uncle Fucking Frank to back off, declares that since she is Archie’s mother, she will take the lead on this issue.

While that’s going on, violence of a different, distinctly more feminine character is happening among the cheerleaders. Cheryl has assigned being the flyer to Toni, which Evelyn very much resents because that was her role. Cheryl comes very close to saying this is a Cheerocracy but what she actually says is that if Evelyn doesn’t like it she can quit immediately. Evelyn looks at the others for support, but none is to be had. OK so we know from the earlier seasons what Evelyn is like, and she is shown to be openly homophobic here, but also given that Kevin got to do all that HE did and still got called BRAVE by Betty as sweet music played over the horrible scene, I think Evelyn deserved better. So Evelyn capitulates as Toni smirks at Cheryl approvingly.

Finally, finally, Mary is asking Archie what is going on. She wants to know if Archie is avoiding basketball because of Frank. Archie says it’s not because of Frank, it’s because of Fred’s absence. There is an anvil in his heart whenever he plays basketball because he misses his father. He’s also afraid of not being as good as Fred. Mary says a truthful thing -that Fred would be proud of Archie. She’s also going to make Frank ease up on him. We’ll see about that.

Jughead has gone charging ahead to go to Rayberry, to tell him outright that he stole a manuscript from him and then read it. Jughead thinks that his telling an already published and well known author that he has “got to get [something] published” is somehow going to get him forgiveness for the breach of trust. When Rayberry tries to get his bearings, Jughead smiles as he says that it was “only for a night.” Rayberry gets angry, and kicks Jughead out. Jughead's heart breaks right there, but he did it to himself. He wanted to speed run to intimacy with this potential father figure (who also confessed to having a difficult relationship with his own parent) but made a colossal mistake by being too hungry & desperate. Rayberry also breaks his own coffee cup by throwing it, which makes Jughead go running, which probably means he grew up in a violent home.

In the girls’ locker room, Choni get their first kiss. Toni was turned on by Cheryl’s show of dominance, even though Cheryl is apparently sexually a total bottom.

And finally, Veronica and Betty are blatantly peeping at Archie undressing. Veronica starts narrating in the most cheesy way: “Stand back Ringling Brothers because THIS is the greatest show on earth!”

OK so I agree that Archie’s abs are pretty fantastic but why does this keep happening to him? In place of Kevin now here’s Veronica egging Betty on to do this voyeurism. Veronica even wants binoculars. Archie sees them though before Veronica can get a gander at his junk. Both girls collapse to the floor. Veronica finds the whole situation pretty funny, but Betty is so embarrassed, saying the two of them are being Peeping Patties. Also? Betty understands a lot of Veronica’s film references, though I suppose Rear Window is very much a mainstream blockbuster.

The next morning, Betty tells Veronica she couldn’t sleep a wink. Veronica was also embarrassed but like many perpetrators of sexual wrong acts she has come around to thinking that Archie was asking for it with his strutting while having abs. She also hopes Archie will be too embarrassed to confront them.

She is utterly wrong about this, because Archie has come directly to them. He doesn’t seem mad however. Archie wants to talk to ONLY Betty. Veronica makes like a MILF, tells Archie to “keep up the good work” before walking away. Archie says he saw B and V peeping on him. Betty does here what Betty always does and she lies, until Archie assures her that he isn’t mad, and actually wants to do a mutual peep show.

This next part is very very cute though. The lust makes the two of them completely braindead so they assure each other that they will both be in their own bedrooms at midnight (so they can do this mutual peep show). Archie is so really, truly, very excited, and Betty is BEYOND excited.

Suddenly, Archie wants to play basketball. Apparently 50s Jughead is not wrong about this part - Archie is entirely fueled by sex. Because he has sex related prospects tonight, suddenly he is “here to play.” He also stands up to Frank, telling him how irrelevant he is -”I’m not doing this for you.” Frank seems to think that his ‘tough love’ worked. I wish I could punch him in the nuts.

A teacher has ratted out Jughead’s author status to Werther (Dupont!). Why are these people at work so very, very late??

Betty and Archie are so ready to do their long distance strip tease/ peep show. Belts, then shirts (and Betty has on the sexy lingerie underneath!), then come Archie’s abs! Betty starts to remove her skirt (though with her unbuttoned blouse still on. And now they are down to just their underwear!

OH NO. RECORD SCRATCH.

I am cockblocked by BOTH Uncle Fucking Frank AND Hal Cooper! Oh Riverdale, that was really cruel. “What in the hell is going on here??” indeed! You title the episode Peep Show and then do THIS?

#i am finally caught up! Next ep drops June 1 here!#riverdale opinon #riverdale ep 7.6 #riverdale episode 122 #riverdale s7 recap #riverdale s7 #Riverdale s6 #riverdale recap #riverdale episode recap

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