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1104-am · 7 months

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karina | my beloved, jimin.

genre ; fluff, angst

pairing ; karina x reader

notes ; took me so long to finish this because i want it to come out perfect! i like how this one turns out so i hope you guys enjoy it <3 also the orange text is a simple indicator so that you guys wont get confused w my with my writing!

word count ; 11k+

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"you may now kiss the bride,"

the reverend's words echoed through the air, signaling the culmination of a beautiful journey. in that moment, the world seemed to fade away, and all attention converged on the couple. time stood still as you gazed at the girl you love with your whole existence, captivated by her radiance.

yu jimin, breathtaking in her white wedding gown, adorned with delicate lace and pearls, took your breath away. as your eyes locked, an overwhelming surge of emotions filled your being. tears welled up in your eyes, cascading down your cheeks as you realized the magnitude of this moment.

you watched as jimin closed the gap. the room fell silent, and all eyes were fixed upon the soon to be newly wed.

as she drew nearer, her beauty intensified, an ethereal glow enveloping her. her eyes shimmered with adoration, the tenderness in her smile did a little something to your heart.

in that instant, everything faded into the background. the murmurs of guests, the soft rustle of fabric, and even the beating of your own heart seemed to vanish, as you look at her.

in that poignant moment, a flood of memories engulfed your mind, transporting you back to the time when your paths first crossed in high school.

amidst the celebratory atmosphere, your gaze briefly shifted from the present to the past. images of the bustling hallways, filled with laughter and youthful exuberance, flickered before your eyes. and there, amidst the sea of faces, you found yourself reliving the very first encounter with the woman who now is standing prettily in ber wedding dress, your beloved yu jimin.

you remember the day you first talked to her. panting as you walked up to the classroom after a particularly grueling p.e session, the scorching heat of the day engulfed you. beads of sweat formed on your forehead, glistening as they trickled down your temple as you curse at your p.e teacher for making you run three laps just for simply being late to his class.

with each step, the air felt heavy and stifling, making it harder to catch your breath. you were about to enter the classroom when you noticed a person, falling asleep in the classroom which made you raise your brow in confusion. you quietly made your way into the quiet yet suffocating classroom before realizing that it was the girl you’ve been wary of. not in a bad way, but just because.

as you approached jimin's desk, your palms grew clammy and your heart raced in your chest. the awkwardness hung in the air, almost tangible, as you contemplated how to break the ice.

finally, mustering your courage, you managed to speak up, your voice coming out in a soft, hesitant tone. "um, hey... are you okay?" you asked, concerned.

jimin, taken aback by your unexpected approach, slowly lifted her head from the desk, her eyes filled with a combination of pain and surprise. "oh, uh.... yeah, i'm... i'm just having really bad cramps," she admitted, her voice filled with a hint of vulnerability. her face as pale as a ghost.

you nodded, trying to convey understanding and concern, then swiftly exited the classroom.

jimin watched as you turned and swiftly exited the classroom, leaving her momentarily puzzled and unsure of your intentions. she couldn't fathom why you would suddenly leave after approaching her first.

you hurried down the empty hallways, your mind raced. you needed to help her. the heat seemed to intensify the urgency of the situation, urging you to find a solution quickly. you made your way to the school's convenience store, your steps quick and purposeful. the air conditioning inside provided a temporary relief from the stifling heat outside.

you scanned the shelves, searching for any over-the-counter medication that could alleviate jimin’s pain. finally, you found what you needed, a box of pain relievers specifically designed for menstrual cramps. clutching the medicine tightly, you made your way back to the classroom.

as you entered the room, you saw jimin looking downcast, her expression a mix of pain and disappointment as she had assume that you had left her in her time of need.

trying to hide your own inner turmoil, you approached her desk again, holding out the box of pain relievers. "jimin? hey i got these for you," you said, your voice gentle and sincere.

her eyes widened in surprise as she saw the medicine. "you got these for me?" she asked, her voice laced with disbelief.

you nodded, your cheeks tinged with a faint blush. "this is the least i can do," you explained, your voice filled with genuine concern.

a mixture of relief and gratitude washed over jimin’s face. she realized that you hadn't abandoned her, but had gone out of your way to assist her. "thank you," she whispered, her voice filled with sincerity and appreciation.

as the days passed, jimin couldn't help but be drawn to your kindness and thoughtfulness. she wasn’t aware of your existence before, but now she finds herself paying attention to every little things you do.

the classroom buzzed with the energy of high school students. some were diligently working on their assignments, while others chatted animatedly with friends. the atmosphere was typical for a mid-morning class, a mixture of focus and distraction.

amid the organized chaos, you sat at your desk, engrossed in your classwork. little did you know that jimin, was observing you from the moment the homeroom teacher left the classroom.

finally, as the noise in the classroom momentarily subsided, jimin seized her chance. she made her way to your desk, her heart pounding with appreciation. with a gentle tap on your shoulder, you turned to see her standing there, a warm and grateful smile on her face.

"hey," jimin said softly, her eyes filled with warmth, "i wanted to thank you for the other day" she said sliding an apple juice onto your table catching you by suprise. you were taken aback by jimin's sudden appearance and the earnestness in her eyes.

"oh, jimin," you replied, surprised, "it was no big deal, really." you flashed her a sincere smile, making her heart skip a beat.

the surrounding chatter seemed to fade away as jimin began to speak. her smile widened. "well, i appreciate it more than you know. and i wanted to do something nice for you in return."

the sincerity in her voice touched you, and you couldn't help but smile. "you don't have to, jimin," you said, still smiling.

jimin's eyes sparkled with gratitude as a tint of blush kissed her cheeks at the way her name rolls of your tongue "i know, but it’s fine! my treat."

as the two of you exchanged a heartfelt conversation, jimin’s deskmate aka her bestfriend couldn't help but take notice of the both of you.

as jimin returned to her seat, her heart still racing from her conversation with you, her desk mate aeri shot her a curious and somewhat suspicious look. aeri had been taken aback, shocked to see jimin interact with you.

you guys were the two pair she least expected to interact. you, a laid back person who rarely interfer with people’s business but presence always felt, and jimin who is the school’s beauty with brain who is a social butterfly that never fails to capture people’s heart but only she doesn’t know that.

aeri leaned in closer, her voice barely above a whisper, "jimin, what was that?" jimin's cheeks flushed with embarrassment as she tried to maintain her composure. she stammered, "oh, um, that? nothing, really. just... you know,"

aeri raised an eyebrow, clearly not convinced by jimin's nonchalant response. "jimin, you've never talked to y/n before, and here you are giving y/n an apple juice?"

jimin's blush deepened, and she looked down at her desk, her fingers nervously tapping the surface. she mumbled, "it's just... y/n helped me out when i had period cramps the other day, and i wanted to say thanks. that's all."

aeri's eyes widens as she listen to the truth behind jimin's actions, "y/n did what? oh wow.. i really didn’t expect that but that’s so nice of y/n!"

jimin smiled gratefully at aeri, feeling relieved that her friend had understood and wasn't prying further. she knew that her interaction with you had surprised not only aeri but also herself, revealing a side of her she hadn't often shown at school.

your interaction with jimin increased ever since that day. be it on purpose or not, the interaction always ends with either both of you smiling from ear to ear.

one day, as you were leaving the classroom, you noticed jimin looking a bit puzzled over her english homework. without hesitation, you approached her desk. kneeling down to match her eye level, you caught her attention immediately.

you smiled and said, "jiminie? need any help with that?"

jimin looked up, her cheeks kissed by a tint of pink because of the cute name you had just called her, eyes lighting up with gratitude. "please! i'm kind of stuck on this part." she pouted, poking her book with the end of her pen.

you sat down beside her, and together, you worked through the english question. as you explained the meaning of the passage to her, jimin's eyes travels between the paper and your lips everytime you turn to look at her and it didn’t go unnoticed by you. it left the both of you smiling to yourselves as you guys seperated ways walking back home that day.

or when you happened to have an extra space under your umbrella on a rainy afternoon. seeing jimin without one, you offered to share it as you both headed to your next class.

jimin expressed her thanks, saying, "thank you y/n, i owe you one!" she said as she immediately went under it, hugging your arm so close to her.

you responded casually, trying to not make it obvious that the skinship she had initiated is completely blowing your heart off right now, "you’re lucky i checked the weather today, or we both would be sitting in our soaking wet uniform for mrs han’s class" you joked. jimin laughed, leaning her head on your shoulder adding the damage she had just did to your heart.

as you walked side by side under the umbrella, you shared light-hearted conversation, making the gloomy day feel a bit brighter.

you remember during lunch breaks, you occasionally found yourselves sitting at the same table. one day, you noticed jimin's lunch contained her favorite dessert stacked on her plate.

with a playful grin, you said, "jimin, is that your secret stash of chocolate cake?"

jimin chuckled and admitted, "maybe... i couldn't resist today."

you couldn't help but smile as you shared a laugh over her sweet indulgence.

you and jimin had grown closer, your relationship evolving into something special, a comforting routine amidst the chaos of school life. whether it was helping each other with classwork, sharing a spontaneous joke, or just quietly enjoying each other's presence, those moments had become the highlight of your day.

so, that morning, as you entered the classroom, you carried with you the expectation that today would be no different.

you smiled to yourself as you envisioned the friendly banter, the shared laughter, and the subtle but undeniable connection you had grown accustomed to.

it was this anticipation that made her absence all the more conspicuous, as the classroom's front door swung open, you found yourself instinctively looking in anticipation for jimin's arrival.

“where is she? she’s never been this late” you mumbled catching the attention of your deskmate, yeji.

“jimin? oh wait, now that you’ve mentioned?” the girl asks, looking around the unironically empty classroom

she was usually punctual, entering the room with a warm smile that brightened the day for everyone. however, to your surprise, jimin was nowhere to be seen today.

as minutes turned into the start of the class and she still hadn't appeared, you initially assumed she might be running late, something out of the ordinary for her but not entirely impossible.

yet, as the class progressed and the morning hours drifted into recess, the absence of her familiar presence became increasingly concerning.

jimin skipping school was a rare scenario. she was known for her dedication to her studies and attendance, never missing a class unless she was genuinely unwell. the worry began to gnaw at you as you couldn't shake the feeling that something must be amiss.

as the bell rang, signaling the end of the school day, your sense of unease about jimin's absence intensified.

without wasting a moment, you rushed over to aeri, your classmate and friend who sat nearby. with a sense of urgency, you leaned in and asked, "hey, aeri, do you know where jimin lives?"

aeri, who had also been worried about jimin's absence, hesitated for a moment. she had been considering checking on jimin herself but seemed relieved that you were willing to take the initiative. still, she needed some reassurance.

"why do you want to know, and what are you planning to do?" aeri inquired with a concerned look

you quickly reassured her, realizing her concerns were valid. "aeri, i'm genuinely worried about her. she's never missed school like this, and i just want to make sure she's okay. i won't be a creep or anything, i promise."

aeri nodded, finally relenting. "alright, i was planning to go check on her too, but if you're going, that's fine. please make sure she's okay." she said as she sends you jimin’s address through kakaotalk.

with a grateful smile, you appreciated aeri's understanding and support. "thank you, aeri. i'll let you know as soon as i find out anything."

as you turned to leave, aeri couldn't resist teasing you a bit more, her playful tone making you flustered. "you know, she probably overslept and here you are, worrying too much! turning into a detective and shit" aeri giggled at the end of her words.

you chuckled and rolled your eyes at aeri’s playful banter, “oh come on, can’t help that i care for her”

“oh??” aeri’s eyes widen as she whipped her head towards you and then back and forth to the people around her wondering fi they heard what you had just said.

"please shut the fuck up aeri. i'll be quick, don't worry."

with that, you left school in a hurry, determined to check on jimin's well-being, even if it meant your concerns might prove unfounded, and aeri's teasing still ringing in your ears.

after rushing to jimin's house, your heart pounded with worry as you stood outside. to your suprise, the door creaked open, and there stood jimin, looking even paler than you had feared, her eyes heavy with exhaustion.

your worry surged as you saw her, and without a second thought, you sprinted towards her, catching her by surprise. "jimin?" you exclaimed, unable to contain your concern any longer.

jimin's tired eyes widened in surprise as she turned to face you, her legs momentarily giving way. however, your quick reflexes caught her just in time, wrapping your arms around her and steadying her.

"oh god, are you okay?" you asked with genuine concern, holding her gently but firmly in your arms.

jimin's face, once pale with fatigue and illness, transformed as she gazed up at you. she leaned into your embrace, her voice soft and filled with gratitude. "i've been so sick, and i'm really glad you're here."

in that moment, as you held jimin close, the worry that had gnawed at your heart finally began to ease. you could feel the warmth of her presence and the depth of her gratitude in the way she clung to you.

jimin, still leaning against you, whispered, "i didn't want to worry anyone, but i've been feeling so sick lately. i thought i could push through it, but today was just too much."

you gently stroked her hair, a soothing gesture, and replied with heartfelt concern, "don’t be so harsh on yourself, okay?"

as you entered the house with jimin leaning on you, your heart filled with worry and care for her well-being. carefully guiding her towards the unfamiliar house, you searched for the living room. you carefully let jimin rest on the couch, before fixing a couple strands of hair that was hiding her pretty face. "what happened? why are you so sick?"

jimin, still looking drained but grateful for your presence, explained in a weak voice, "i caught a cold last night, and it just got worse. my parents are out for the weekend’s outstation trip, and i didn't want to bother them. but i’ve been too weak to even get out of bed, let alone go out and get medicine or eat."

“you should’ve called me. i was so worried about you jimin” your concern for jimin had poured out in your words, reflecting just how much you cared about her.

you were taken aback by the depth of your own emotions, and for a moment, you felt a rush of shyness as you realized how openly you had expressed your care for her, “.. or you could’ve called aeri”

gently placing the pillows and helping her settle on the couch, you stammered, "let’s get you some medicine and something to eat”

the realization of your deep feelings for jimin had made you momentarily shy, you cursed to yourself when you realized how you sounded just now but your determination to help her remained unwavering.

as you moved around in jimin's kitchen, searching for the medicine and the ingredients to make her a warm porridge, your thoughts were divided. on one hand, you were determined to find what you needed to take care of her. on the other hand, you couldn't help but steal glances at jimin in the living room.

every few moments, you would check on her, your worry and care evident in your eyes. she sat there, looking fragile yet comforted by your presence, and your heart swelled with the desire to ensure her comfort and well-being.

you found the medicine and the necessary ingredients eventually, but your occasional glances at jimin throughout the process were a testament to your unwavering concern for her.

few minutes passed and as you stood by the stove, carefully stirring the porridge and making sure the medicine was ready, you felt a pair of eyes on you. turning slightly, you found jimin sitting in the living room, her gaze fixed on you. her eyes held an expression you couldn't quite place—gratitude, warmth, and something more.

a gentle smile formed on your lips as you continued to cook, but you couldn't ignore the flutter of your own heart. it was as though you could feel the intensity of her emotions from across the room.

"should i turn on the tv to distract you while you eat?"

jimin’s gaze never left you as she shook her head softly, her voice barely above a whisper. "no, i just want to look at you."

your heart skipped a beat at her words, and a warmth washed over you. with the bowl of warm porridge and the medicine in hand, you returned to where jimin was sitting in the living room.

you offered her the food, and she accepted it with a grateful smile.

“careful, it’s hot” you said, sitting down next to her on the comfy couch. her small hands proceed to take the bowl from you.

however, as she reach for the spoon, she couldn't resist a playful grin. she set the spoon down in your hand, pretending to be weak, and looked up at you with big, pleading eyes. "could you,, feed me?"

you chuckled softly at her playful request, charmed by her antics. "what got into you?"

“i dont know” jimin faked a cough, making you roll your eyes in a joking manner. “maybe it’s the cold that is getting to me” she playfully giggled as you pick up the spoon. jimin's playful request to be fed made your heart flutter, and you couldn't help but smile as you continued to feed her.

with each spoonful, she would occasionally blow on the hot porridge and then take a small, delicate bite, all while maintaining eye contact with you.

a soft chuckle escaped your lips as you couldn't resist teasing her. "you know, jimin, you're quite the drama queen today."

jimin giggled, her eyes sparkling with mischief. "well, i have to take advantage of being sick, right?"

you nodded in agreement, playing along with her delightful antics. "that's true. and it gives me the chance to pamper you a little."

jimin's cheeks turned a faint shade of pink as she gazed at you, her voice soft and filled with warmth, looking at you with wide eyes. "that’s so sweet?"

your heart skipped a beat at her words, and you couldn't help but feel a rush of affection. "only for you,”

the rest of the evening was filled with shared laughter, playful banter, and moments that made your heart swell with fondness.

jimin felt a change in the air. her heart raced a little faster whenever you looked at her, and a warmth spread through her chest as she enjoyed your company. it was in those quiet moments when you shared stories and exchanged smiles that jimin couldn't help but wonder if there was something more between you both, or if you felt like this towards her as well.

in all honesty, you were aware that your feelings for her were far from simple. every time you see her, your emotions swelled, intensifying your desire to be transparent about your affection for her.

and finallly after much contemplation and discussion with one of your closest friend yunjin, you had finally devised a well-thought-out plan to address your emotions and reveal to jimin just how much you cherished her.

it was during this vibrant season that yunjin, one day in class, (not so) suddenly exclaimed, "you guys! there's a firework festival happening this weekend! we should all go together!"

the idea of a firework festival was met with enthusiasm from your classmates, and as the conversation buzzed around you, you couldn't help but seize the opportunity. nervously, you turned to jimin and asked, "will you be free to join me?"

jimin looked at you, her eyes sparkling with excitement. "why is that even a question? i’m always free if that means i get to spend time with you"

you smiled, so stupidly that you wish you could just wash your whole expression off right at the moment. you laughed and internally let out a deep sigh, one of you and yunjin’s biggest concern is jimin not being able to make it this weekend.

your heart raced with anticipation as you managed to invite jimin. however, you couldn't help but feel a bit jittery, knowing that the firework festival was the perfect setting to finally confess your feelings to her.

the days leading up to the festival were filled with a mix of excitement and nervousness. you wanted everything to be perfect, and you couldn't stop thinking about how to express your emotions to jimin.

yunjin decided to pay you a visit at your house to offer her support in preparation for your confession to jimin. constantly having to reassure you that everything will be okay as she picks what would look good on you for the upcoming night.

she was there to assist you in choosing the right words to express your feelings, select the perfect outfit to wear on this momentous occasion, and guide you on what steps to take immediately after confessing. her presence and advice provided a sense of comfort and assurance as you geared up to share your heartfelt emotions with jimin.

the warm summer evening bathed the surroundings in a soft, golden glow. jimin’s eyes sparkled with excitement and happiness when she saw you walking towards her, sitting next to her on the shared mat.

she was pretty. you couldn't help but stare at jimin, who looked absolutely stunning with her hair tied into a messy bun, her bangs covering her forehead.you were staring a little bit too much, too much that jimin waved her hand in front of you, snapping you out of your trance.

unable to contain your affection, you gently fixed her bangs, "hi pretty, you look absolutely breathtaking." jimin's cheeks turned a lovely shade of pink as she glanced at you, her smile radiant. "and you, you clean up pretty well too."

as you and jimin waited for the festival to begin, the conversation flowed effortlessly, and every word you exchanged felt like another step closer to the confession you had been eagerly waiting to make.

jimin's eyes twinkled as she talked about her favorite firework shapes. "i've always loved the ones that look like colorful stars. what about you?"

you couldn't help but chuckle. "i'll have to go with the ones that burst into a heart shape. they remind me of you."

jimin's cheeks turned a delightful shade of pink, and she playfully nudged you. "you’re such a charmer, aren’t you?"

as the festival grounds starts to get crowded, the atmosphere became increasingly electric. the anticipation was palpable as you both felt relief to find a spot to enjoy the fireworks beforehand. you and jimin shared a quiet moment, taking in the anticipation in the night sky.

right before the first firework was about to light up the night sky, your heart brimmed with excitement. you turned to jimin, a warm smile plastered on your face as you gently took her hand in your own. your fingers interlaced, and in that moment, it felt like the world around you had faded away,

jimin, caught off guard by your sudden hand-holding, blinked in surprise. her cheeks flushed with a rosy hue, and her eyes sparkled with a mixture of delight and endearment. she didn't pull her hand away but instead tightened her grip on yours, her smile growing even brighter. her reaction was undeniably cute, and it made your heart skip a beat.

with a soft smile, jimin leaned closer, her voice a gentle murmur. "i'm so glad you invited me tonight. it means a lot to me."

"i wouldn't want to be here with anyone else, jimin." a gentle smile graced her lips, and her eyes seemed to shimmer with appreciation and affection. your words had clearly touched her heart, and her voice held a hint of tenderness as she responded.

“remember, first burst and you’re on it” yunjin’s voice rang in your head as you nervously anticipated the first burst of the fireworks.

as if on cue, the first burst of fireworks painted the night sky with a dazzling array of colors. in the gentle glow of the fireworks, you turned to her, your heart brimming with love. "jimin," you began, your voice soft yet filled with sincerity,

jimin turn to look at you, as if you’re the most important thing in the universe right now. the words you had been waiting to say spilled out from your heart, "jimin, there's something i've been wanting to tell you."

jimin's eyes widened with curiosity, her gaze that waslocked onto yours, deepened "what is it?"

your voice continued, each word carrying the weight of your emotions. "i want you to know that i really care about you, jimin. you mean so much to me, and i... i think i'm in love with you."

jimin's eyes shimmered with a mixture of surprise and emotion as the fireworks faded into the night. there was a small pause that felt like an eternity. the world seemed to hold its breath as you anxiously waited for her response, your heart pounding with uncertainty.

in that brief moment of silence, you couldn't help but worry that you might have overwhelmed her or said too much, too soon. but then, as the next burst of fireworks filled the night sky, jimin's eyes welled up with tears, and a smile broke across her face like the dawn of a new day.

jimin leaned closer, her voice filled with affection. "you have no idea how happy you've made me tonight. i've been waiting to hear those words from you."

your heart swelled with love, and you gently cupped her face, your thumbs brushing away a stray tear. "jimin, you're the most incredible person i've ever met. you deserve all the happiness in the world."

the next firework burst into the sky, casting a soft, romantic glow over both of you. you leaned in, and your lips met in a sweet, tender kiss, sealing your confession with a promise of a new chapter in your lives.

as the night continued with its magical display, the two of you held each other, feeling like the luckiest people in the world. your love had found its moment to shine, just like the fireworks in the summer night sky.

as the fireworks festival came to a close, you walked jimin home, hand in hand. the summer night had left an indelible mark on your hearts, and the gentle evening breeze seemed to carry the whispers of your newfound love.

the conversation between you both was easy and sweet, filled with dreams of the future. as you reached her doorstep, the moment to part ways arrived, and you couldn't help but feel a twinge of sadness. jimin, however, looked up at you with a soft, affectionate smile.

"i had the most amazing night with you," she said, her voice filled with warmth.

you couldn't agree more. "i can't wait for more nights like these." your grip on her hand tighten, as she bring the back of your hand to her lips, kissing it softly.

jimin's eyes twinkled with excitement, and she hesitated for a moment before speaking. "so, now that we're, you know, partners... how should we address each other?"

you chuckled, realizing you hadn't quite clarified that yet. "i think we can keep it simple. do you have any special name you'd like to be called? i'd love to hear it."

jimin blushed at the suggestions, and then she looked at you with a mischievous glint in her eyes. "how about 'the love of my life'?"

your heart skipped a beat at her playfulness, and you couldn't resist grinning. "i think that's perfect, the love of my life." with a teasing glint in your eye, you added, "but maybe on casual days, i'll call you 'sweetheart' or 'babe.'"

jimin giggled at your playful banter. "you're spoiling me with options now, aren't you?" you leaned in, brushing a soft kiss against her cheek. "well, you deserve all the sweet names in the world."

the two of you shared a playful and affectionate moment and with that, you shared a tender kiss, sealing the evening with a promise of more beautiful moments to come, and a good night wish.

"come visit me in my dreams tonight, okay?" jimin playfully tapped your chest, eliciting a hearty laugh that left your cheekbones aching from the constant smile.

"you're getting awfully clingy," you teased, just as jimin closed the front door, leaving you alone with a foolish grin plastered across your face.

after that night, your bond with jimin grew stronger by the day. it was as if the sparks of love from that summer night had ignited a permanent flame between you two. you became inseparable at school, often seen together in the hallways, at lunch, and during group activities.

but what made your connection even more special was the low-key nature of your relationship. you didn't flaunt your love for each other; it was the little things that spoke volumes. the shared smiles, secret glances, and the way your hands would subtly find each other's during class or while walking down the school corridors. everyone loved seeing the two of you together, and your classmates often commented on how perfect you were for each other.

of course, like any relationship, you had your disagreements. there were times when a fight would erupt, sometimes over trivial matters and at other times over more serious issues. but what set your relationship apart was your commitment to working things out. you'd stay up late talking, apologizing, and understanding each other's perspectives. you made it a point to never let one another go to sleep upset.

jimin and you knew that in each other, you had found someone worth fighting for and loving with all your hearts.

as high school came to a close, jimin and you continued to be each other's constant support, studying together, sharing notes, and making precious memories along the way. it wasn't always smooth sailing, but the challenges only strengthened your bond.

one sunny afternoon, the results of the university entrance exams were released. you and jimin anxiously checked the list of accepted students. your eyes widened in amazement when you saw your names side by side on the acceptance list of the same prestigious university.

excitement bubbled within you as you turned to jimin. "love! we did it! we're going to the same university!"

jimin's eyes sparkled with joy, and she couldn't contain her enthusiasm. "i can't believe it! we're going to be together in college!"

the two of you shared an exhilarating hug right then and there, surrounded by classmates who were cheering on their own achievement.

with the news that you'd both been accepted into the same university, the excitement in your hearts was hard to contain. you decided to celebrate this wonderful milestone with a special dinner night.

as the sun set, you and jimin dressed up for the occasion, looking your best for the evening ahead. there was an air of anticipation in the way you smiled at each other, knowing that this celebration was not just about your academic success but the continuation of your beautiful journey as a couple.

you chose a cozy, candlelit restaurant known for its delectable cuisine. the atmosphere was perfect for a night of celebration. the soft glow of the candles, the soothing music in the background, and the warmth of each other's company set the scene for a memorable evening.

the waiter brought a delectable dessert, adorned with a sparkler that lit up the room. you reached across the table and took her hand, your eyes filled with love and gratitude. "i'm so lucky to have you by my side, not just tonight, but for all the nights that are yet to come. let’s do well"

she squeezed your hand, returning your gaze with affection. "i know, i can't wait to see where it takes us."

hand in hand, the evening continued with a sense of wonder and joy, as you celebrated your shared success.

as you both enrolled in the first semester at the university, your hearts were filled with excitement and anticipation. while you had chosen different majors, it didn't stop you from making time to meet up during lunch or to study together whenever free moments presented themselves. your connection remained strong, and the bond you had built over the years only grew deeper in this new chapter of your lives.

you cherished those moments when you could share a meal, talk about your classes, and laughing whenever the other makes a joke. those simple, everyday interactions were what made your days brighter.

however, as the semester progressed, jimin started making new friends and gradually spent more time with her newfound companions. the dynamic between you two began to change. she was excited about her expanding social circle and the adventures that came with it.

you didn't mind her making new friends; in fact, you were happy for her. it was her happiness that mattered the most. however, you couldn't help but feel worried about how less time she spent with you. lunches together became less frequent, and the study sessions no longer had the same closeness they once did.

your concern grew when she started attending parties thrown by her new friends. you used to accompany her and enjoy the gatherings, but as she began to attend more frequently, you found yourself getting tired and not as enthusiastic about going along.

it wasn't about jealousy, it was the fear that the person you had shared so many moments with was slipping away, and it left a pang in your heart.

in the beginning, you tried your best to be supportive and understanding. you knew that making new friends and embracing the social aspects of university life was an important part of the college experience. jimin deserved to have that, and you genuinely wanted her to enjoy this new chapter of her life.

however, as the weeks turned into months, the change in your dynamic became increasingly noticeable. your conversations became shorter, and sometimes you felt like you were the one initiating them. you missed those shared dreams, heart-to-heart talks before gong to bed whenever she came for sleepover, and moments of laughter that used to be a staple in your relationship.

in the span of 4 months the parties became more frequent, and you often found yourself neglected and staying back, choosing rest over the late nights of celebration. it was as if you were leading parallel lives, existing in different orbits. the anxiety of feeling left behind began to weigh on you.

one day, as you were going through your own class schedule, you saw a message from jimin about another party she planned to attend. you felt a mixture of emotions—worry, frustration, and the desire to talk things out. you replied,

“jimin”

“understand you want to enjoy college life”

“and make new friends”

“but i miss spending time with you and talking like we used to”

“can we find some balance”

jimin's response was quick, but it was clear that her priorities had shifted.

“i know, but i'm just exploring new opportunities”

“we always meet”

“let me have fun, pls”

her words stung, and you were left with a heavy heart. it was a difficult realization that the person you had shared so many memories with now had different priorities. you weren't against her growth or happiness, but the sudden distance between you two left you with a sense of loneliness you hadn't felt before.

jimin was excited about tonight’s party invitation she'd received and she couldn't contain her enthusiasm. you, on the other hand, couldn't help but feel the distance that had grown between you.

as jimin prepared for the party, you couldn't contain your frustration any longer. leading to you breaking the tense atmosphere as you confronted her. "jimin, do you really have to go to another party?” you turn to look at jimin who was fixing her bang and her annoyingly short dress. “you've been going out so often lately, and we barely spend any time together anymore."

jimin paused, her eyes flickering with a mixture of emotions. she retorted, "i have to, okay? i want to enjoy college life and have fun. it doesn't mean i'm abandoning you."

you were hurt by her response, and the frustration bubbled up inside. "it's not about you enjoying college life, jimin. i want you to enjoy it but it feels like you're choosing these parties and your new friends over our relationship”

jimin's frustration mirrored your own. "come on, y/n. this again? we should trust each other. i can't feel like i'm constantly under surveillance, or that i can't have a life outside of us."

the argument escalated, harsh words exchanged that neither of you truly meant. your voice grew louder as you tried to make her understand your perspective. "i just want you to make time for us too, jimin. is that too much to ask?"

jimin's patience wore thin, and her voice wavered with a mix of anger and sadness. "i can't be your only source of happiness. you need to find some independence too! you can't cling to me like this."

tears welled up in your eyes as you felt a profound sense of loss. "i'm not clinging, i just don't want to lose you."

the weight of your words hung heavily in the air, and it all became too much for jimin to handle. she couldn't take the mounting tension and your jealousy any longer. in a moment of frustration, she exclaimed, "maybe you should figure out what you want from this relationship," and then stormed out of the house.

left standing alone in the silence that followed, your heart ached, and you realized that something had irrevocably changed between you and jimin. you were left to grapple with the reality of her absence and the implications of your argument.

two hours had passed since the heated argument with jimin, and you were now in your apartment, trying to clear your mind and calm your racing thoughts. the silence in the room was overwhelming, and you couldn't shake off the heavy feeling that something had been irreparably broken.

as you went about your evening routine, your mind wandered back to your argument with jimin. you wondered whether you had been too demanding, too clingy, or if there was a better way you could have expressed your feelings. you had no answers, just a deep sense of longing for the way things used to be.

suddenly, the door to your room swung open, and there stood jimin, disheveled and with her makeup smeared. Her mascara had left streaks on her cheeks, and her eyes were red and swollen.

panic surged through you at the sight of her disarray. without a second thought, you rushed to her side and pulled her into a tight, comforting hug.

the familiar scent of the cologne on her shirt filled your senses, the cologne you had come to associate with the late nights she'd spent sneaking into bed after parties. it wasn’t your cologne, nor was it hers. and with all the mess right now, all your doubts and thought fell into pieces.

and that was when you slowly let go of the hug, slowly distancing yourself from jimin, "jimin, what happened?" you asked, tears welling up your own eyes as you figured out.

her breath trembled, her voice quivering with anxiety and guilt. "i slept with someone else... y/n .. i fucked, someone…” jimin sobs gradually grew intense.

“you..." your voice was barely a whisper, filled with the overwhelming hurt and anguish you were experiencing. "intentionally, jimin?" your voice broke

“i wanted to convince myself that i was just drunk, but it was all intentional. y/n .. i messed up-" her red shot eyes turned to look up into yours.

you couldn't meet her gaze, knowing that the same eyes had once locked onto another's just hours aho, sharing affectionate glances, breath, and kisses.

"you messed up?" your voice trembled with anger and sorrow. "that's an understatement, jimin. you betrayed us. you betrayed everything we had."

jimin's tears flowed freely now, and she buried her face in her hands. "i never meant to hurt you. it was... i don't know, i thought it would help me forget about all the arguments and our drifting apart."

the words stung like a thousand needles, and you turned away, your back to jimin. "so, you thought fucking someone else was the solution? how does that make any sense!"

she reached out to you, her voice pleading. "it doesn't. it was a terrible mistake, and i hate myself for it.

you couldn't face her; the betrayal was too raw. "jimin, i loved you more than anything, but this... this is something i can't—" your voice cracked, your movements faltering as the weight of heartbreak pressed down upon you. every word felt like a painful reminder of what had been shattered.

jimin's pleas for forgiveness as she sobs, her voice muffled as the tears continued to flow. her attempts to reach out and touch you went unanswered. she could see the pain in your eyes, the same eyes that had once gazed at her with love and trust, now clouded with hurt and betrayal.

your voice was still heavy with sorrow as you asked, "...what led to all of this? what caused you to betray us?" you breath hitched, holding back another breakdown “three years jimin. three years..”

her eyes were red from crying, and she seemed to tremble at the sincerity of your question. "i.. we were growing apart, and I didn't know how to handle it."

your heart ached as you probed further, "and who is it, jimin? who did you betray me with?"

jimin’s gaze fell to the ground, and she hesitated for a moment before whispering a name that felt like a dagger through your heart.

the truth was as painful as you had feared, leaving you both trapped in the aftermath of the devastating confession.

“lee jeno”

you took a step back, distancing yourself from the person you had cherished. the room felt like it was closing in on you, and you had to escape the painful atmosphere. "i need some space, jimin. i can't... i can’t be around you right now."

as you left the room, her sobs echoed in your ears, a heartbreaking symphony of the love that had been lost. your heart felt like it was shattering into a million pieces, and there was no immediate solution to mend the damage.

that had been the last time you laid eyes on jimin. in the days that followed, you spiraled into a world of sleepless nights and avoidance. your once vibrant social life dwindled as you withdrew even from your closest friends and family. you attended classes like a ghost and vanished right after.

jimin, on the other hand, wasn't faring any better. that night when you left her, she had spent hours in her room, blaming herself for the stupid decision she had made. she recognized the effect of her betrayal and the trust she had shattered couldn’t be fixed.

it was that very night when jimin made the difficult decision to delete and block the people she hung out out with at parties, distancing herself from the world she had become entangled with. she regretted not listening to you earlier, acknowledging that her actions had led to a point of no return.

while you deatached yourself from the world, jimin showed up on campus every day, determined to fix everything that went wrong even if it took years. she understood that she should be embarrassed and that she had to face the consequences of her actions. yet, she couldn't bear the thought of losing you and desperately longed for a chance to make things right again.

couldn’t bear the pain, jimin realized that she needed to find a way to bridge the immense gap between you two.

she decided to pour her feelings into heartfelt letters, carefully crafting each word as an attempt to convey the depth of her remorse and her desire to heal what was broken.

jimin’s determination kept her waiting at the cafeteria, just in case one day you might return to savor your favorite lunch. she knew deep down that you'd never show up, but she couldn't help but wait.

on tuesdays, she occasionally found herself waiting at your preferred boba shop, hoping against hope that you would walk in one day, ordering your usual drink.

but despite her efforts, you had completely shut yourself off from her and any interaction. your avoidance reached new levels, and you deliberately altered your daily patterns to ensure you didn't cross paths with jimin on campus.

it was as if you were leading an entirely different life, one starkly different from the world she once knew.

time moved on, and the years passed by, marked by the silence between you. jimin , however, did not give up. every month, like clockwork, she would send you letters filled with her thoughts, apologies, and hope.

they remained unopened, gathering dust on your shelf. each letter was a message of love and remorse, a silent cry for a second chance that you never acknowledged.

as you neared the final semester of your final year, the unopened letters had become a part of your life's background noise. it had been years since you last saw jimin, and you had grown accustomed to your separate lives.

seasons changed and the letters eventually stopped arriving, and you thought that perhaps this was the definitive end of jimin’s attempts to rekindle your connection.

the thought was bittersweet. on one hand, you found relief in finally moving forward from the heartbreak, but on the other, the weight of what was lost remained heavy in your heart.

then, one day, when you least expected it, a message popped up on your phone. It was from jimin. asking to meet you somewhere, and the mix of emotions that surged through you was impossible to ignore. it was a text that marked the possibility of reconnection, or perhaps, closure.

you couldn't predict what the meeting would bring, but you knew it was a crucial moment in both your lives, a moment that could change everything, or end the chapter that had been left hanging for so long.

you agreed to meet jimin at a quaint little café, and as you sat across from each other, the atmosphere was thick with uncertainty.

your mind raced with questions. was she finally asking for a second chance? was it time to open up your heart to her once more? you couldn't deny that you had never truly moved on from jimin, and the thought of a future together still lingered in the depths of your heart.

as you both engaged in small talk, the familiar smile she had always hown you kept appearing, making your thoughts drift towards the possibility of rekindling your connection. you imagined what it would be like to hold her hand again, to share your dreams and your life with her, as you once did.

but just when you were leaning towards the idea of a fresh start, jimin slid a wedding invitation onto the table, and it caught you completely off guard.

you blinked in disbelief, your heart dropped to the pit of your stomach. the invitation sat there.

the café's ambiance provided an uneasy backdrop for what felt like a pivotal moment. you couldn't help but ask the burning question. "jimin, what's this about?"

jimin's eyes met yours, and she took a deep breath, as if she'd been mentally preparing for this moment. "i know it must be a shock. i didn't want to keep it from you any longer."

you studied her face, searching for answers. "whose wedding is it?"

jimin hesitated for a moment before answering. "it's my wedding"

the words hit you like a ton of bricks. you felt like the wind had been knocked out of you, and you struggled to comprehend the enormity of the revelation. "your... wedding? i don't understand."

she continued, her voice shaking. "i never stopped loving you, but i couldn't keep waiting for something that might never happen. i tried to move on, and i met someone else. we've been together for a while now"

the truth was like a dagger to your heart, and you couldn't hide the pain in your eyes. "so, you're getting married. you're moving on."

jimin nodded, tears glistening in her eyes. "i'm not asking for your blessing or forgiveness. i just wanted you to know, to understand why i couldn't keep writing those letters or waiting any longer."

you couldn't find the right words to respond. the thought of jimin being with someone else, preparing for a life you once envisioned together, was a devastating blow. you knew that you had pushed her away, but you never anticipated this outcome.

in that moment, you understood that these words were not merely about her wedding. they were about the pain and heartbreak that had filled the void between you.

jimin's tear hung precariously on her lower eyelid for a moment before finally falling, and it was as if the drop held all the unspoken love and regret. the café, once a place of shared laughter, now bore witness to the depths of your intertwined emotions.

a solitary tear rolled down jimin's cheek, glistening like a diamond. her voice was barely more than a whisper as she choked back sobs, her eyes locked onto yours. "i'm so, so sorry."

silence enveloped both of you, a heavy blanket of emotions that neither of you could escape. the café, once a place of potential reconciliation, now held the bittersweet truth that your time with jimin had passed.

“you may now kiss the bride”

you watched as jimin closed the gap. the room fell silent, and all eyes were fixed upon the soon to be newly wed.

as she drew nearer, her beauty intensified, an ethereal glow enveloping her. her eyes shimmered with adoration, the tenderness in her smile did a little something to your heart.

you watched in silence as jimin closed the gap between her and her partner. the room seemed to fade away, and all eyes were fixed upon the soon-to-be newlyweds. the world around you blurred as your gaze remained locked on her.

as she drew nearer to her partner, her beauty seemed to intensify, an ethereal glow enveloping her. her eyes shimmered with adoration, and the tenderness in her smile was nothing short of breathtaking.

but in that very moment, the heartbreak was like a physical weight pressing down on your chest. you couldn't look away as jimin leaned in to kiss her partner. it was a kiss filled with love, the kind you had once shared with her. it was a reminder of the life you had hoped to build together, now realized in someone else's arms.

as you stood there, a sense of loss and longing washed over you. you couldn't help but wonder if you had made a mistake by letting jimin go, by not fighting for what you once had. the kiss marked a new beginning for jimin, but for you, it was a painful ending, a stark reminder of the love you had lost.

jimin offered you an opportunity, a chance to rebuild the trust that had once been broken. but you hesitated, unable to fully place your trust in her, in the one you still loved.

in the end, there was no one to blame but yourself. the choices you made, from buying her medicine back in high school to confessing your feelings under the fireworks, had all led to this moment. meeting jimin, loving her, had shaped your life in both beautiful and painful ways.

with a heavy heart, you realized that maybe those decisions, no matter how challenging or painful, were all part of your story with your beloved jimin.

my beloved, jimin.

#aespa #aespa imagine #aespa imagines #aespa oneshot #aespa x reader #kpop angst #aespa angst #aespa kpop #aespa moodboard #aespa karina #karina x reader #karina imagines #karina #yu jimin x reader #aespa scenarios #aespa reactions

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transjudas · 1 year

Photo

The images we get of Joe in Love From the Other Side are so important. Because even though (and because, I think) he isn’t literally physically present in the video, he’s so present and integral to everything we see.

We get to see a silhouette of his actual body with the whole group as we get an explanation for why he’s being represented by a gigantic raccoon, because they knew they couldn’t and didn’t want to just not include him without any explanation at all.

We see that not only is he part of the group effort in pulling the rope to topple the tower, they couldn’t have done that without him joining them and being part of the group. (thank you to @fob8 for pointing this out to me!)

And we see him helping them raise the flag up. The band’s flag. As celebratory fireworks go off around them. He’s there with them celebrating this new era even when he can’t be on stage or on a set with them. He’s there.

And he’s so, so important.

He’s important to the band, he’s important to his friends. And he’s never going to be left behind.

#fob #fob8 #fall out boy #love from the other side #joe trohman #fobedit #userkam

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avidfics · 4 months

Note

pretty pretty pretty pls part 2 to moving on if you’re feeling up to it!

Appreciate the request anon :)

Trying to Move On

summary: soccer player abby doesn’t like seeing you with someone else (Moving on Part 2)

warnings: slightly toxic and clueless abby; jealousy, slight groping, fluff, angst, teeny tiny mention of fingering but mostly fluff

a/n: appreciate all the love part 1 received! thanks!

abby knew how to handle a team, she was an awesome soccer player, but she was shit at winning her girl back. It had just been over a week since you sprung on her that you were going on a date and were sick of her not reciprocating your feelings. What the hell did that even mean? Sure she had a certain reputation around campus but everyone knew that you were her main girl.

After every game it was your body she’d enveloped in a crushing celebratory embrace, it was your name she’d accidentally whisper while she’d be thrusting her fingers into a random girl (which resulted in countless unfriendly slaps across the face), and it was your bed she’d sneak in whenever she was completely spent, snuggling her front to your plush backside. Arms circling your warm waist while her heavy hands always found a way to push themselves to nestle between your thighs.

Her legs pressed together just reminiscing how your thighs always instinctively would wedge her hand in deeper, a slight high-pitched moan escaping your lips.

abby let out a sigh. It was her favorite sleep position and kept her hand nice and toasty throughout the night.

The image of someone else taking her destinated spot in your bed hit her with the force of a freight truck. What if you no longer unlocked your door late at night because your lame date was the one sneaking their hand between your thighs, pulling honey-coated pleas from your lips?

Her hands balled into fists just thinking about the image. You two were inseparable, truthfully she didn’t know where she ended and you started, and she wouldn’t wish it any other way. If only she wasn’t so clueless when it came to talking about her feelings and desires.

The beep of a door locking breaks her out of the maddening thought of you with someone else and is replaced with a radiant smile as you round the side of her house to meet her in the backyard, a place she typically practices drills during her free time.

You had tried distancing yourself from abby over the past week but today she asked for you to come over and spend time together like you used to do. The request wasn’t easy to agree to, especially since you were trying to get over abby. But you could never say no to her, which was a fact abby was well aware of and continued to use to her advantage.

You immediately regret your decision as you walk onto the vibrant green grass and see abby causally kicking a soccer ball in full leisure attire that would look ordinary on anyone else but was panty melting on her. Loose navy shorts hugged her ass and cut off high on her thighs, leaving out her toned, muscular legs in full view. As she did complicated foot work her muscles flexed in a way that created sinful thoughts sprouting in your mind. Your only luck was the fact that she wore a full shirt, even though her burly arms were on full display, a thin layer of sweat highlighted every little groove and dent along her delicious body.

But more than anything, what had your heart pounding was the way her face morphed into a blinding smile immediately when she noticed you walking onto the field.

Which made it almost gut-wrenching when your date from last week finally came into view. abby’s smile went lopsided and her stride fumbled a bit as she glared at the girl standing a bit too close to your side.

Your date seemed oblivious to abby’s irked glare as she stepped forward, hand-stretched for a handshake. “I’ve heard so much about you and am a huge fan-” her pleasantries hang in the air as abby pushes past the outstretched hand and bends low to wrap her arms beneath your bum and lifts you into the air. “Abigail anderson let me down now!” you screech even as a smile threatens to break out from her firm lips.

Not that abby is deterred as she smiles from below you. “Let me have my fun, its been forever, doll.” The past week of radio silence is all forgotten as the familiarity between you two returns with smooth ease.

An awkward cough from your date pops the bubble. You start to struggle away a bit more but abby just gives a stubborn look in retaliation. It takes pinching her ear for her to reluctantly set you down. A pout quickly forms on her lips but she finally drags her attention to your date. “Thought Uber drivers were supposed to remain in the car.”

The insult takes both you and your date by surprise but luckily, she recovers fast. An easy grin slides on her face. “If I was only the Uber driver, her mouth gave me a pretty intimate tip last night.”

Embarrassment heated your checks yet you refused to duck down in shame since you were single. But the look on abby’s face makes you immediately glance away. Burning accusations and a hundred demanding questions were silently thrown your way. But to the girl, abby just chuckles. Her face seemed carefree but below veins along her arm became visible as she gripped her hands together in a vise. “Good to know my teachings are paying off after so many nights together.” She gives the girl a dismissive once-over. “Her choice of partner could be better. But now that my team has a few home games lined up, I’ll be here to fill any needs. You shouldn't expect as many calls after today.”

With that she drags you away to the porch even as you apologize profusely to your date. As soon as you enter her place you snatch your hand away. “Fuck you, abby.”

Any lingering anger had already melted away from her shoulders. That smile reserved only for you came back as she leaned so close that you became squashed against her chest and the metal door knob. She squeezes against you so closely that you can tell her sports bra is unpadded as pebbled nipples drag against your boobs. “Sure, doll. Does right here work?” The soft puffs of her breath tickle your lips. There seems to be a direct link from the bounding beats of your heart to the maddening pulse in your clit. So distracted you almost don’t hear her. “Because I can attach my strap-on in under a minute.” The click of her locking the door behind your waist jerks your thoughts away from the sinful curiosity of what she’d look like with a strap-on tied around her hips.

And judging by her mocking smile she already guessed what you were imagining. “I’m glad you find humor is my humiliation. This is all just one big joke to you, right? Finally, I found someone who is actually interested in me, and your first instinct is to sabotage it.” Desperately you dash the horny thoughts away to be able to look her in the eyes. Demanding an answer.

Her brow scrunches. “oh please, there’s been plenty of girls interested in you. It takes forever to get rid of them.” Her callused hand reaches out to snag you closer by your belt buckle. “But if you want to go on awkward dates which will ultimately result in nothing, be my guest sweetheart. Sure, it sucks that we’re together and you want to date around, but whatever.” The pout returns even as her strong grip remains on your belt buckle. That last sentence takes your entire focus, leaving you to be dragged by the brooding girl into the living room. Completely malleable as she sits on her sofa, reclined horizontally, and settles you so your butt nestles against her thighs so you're propped up. She’s fully content now as she hums a little song, tracing patterns along your soft legs.

As good as being handled by abby feels, what she’s claiming has just shifted the world on its axis. “abs… we’re not together.”

She rolls her eyes. Both her heavy hands grips your waist - pressing her rough fingertips into your cushioned skin. With anyone else you’d feel self-conscious but with her you just felt cherished. “I think I’d know if we were going out or not.”

“Just because you’re jealous doesn’t mean you can make things up.”

The prettiest clueless expression morphs across her face. “So even though I stole a copy of your keys, we hang out every single day, I listed you as my wife on my insta bio, and I'm always dry humping you whenever I sleep over your place, that doesn’t mean we’re together?” Another wave of embarrassment makes you bend over and cower your face in her neck. “I swear you’re so dumb sometimes. Abs, you can’t just assume. You have to ask.”

“Do I have to get on one knee?” you laughed at her clueless joke. “Babe, what will it take for you to date me?” The soft question is followed by her heavy paws climbing higher and higher along your inner thighs. A whiny moan slips out your mouth when her thumbs get dangerously close to your outer lips.

Still, you playfully acted as if to ponder the question over. “Hmm, I’ll add you to my roster.”

That smile, you absolutely adored, returns. As if pleased with your answer, twin kisses are pressed to your inner wrists. “As long as I’m placed at number one I’m certain I can get rid of the others.”

#abby anderson fic #abby anderson x reader #abby tlou #abby anderson x female reader #abby anderson #abby x reader #abby anderson fluff

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anzulvr · 11 months

Note

May I request how would Karma react when Asano is interested in Karma's s/o? Like here's the story, Asano and reader have been classmates and really good friends but the reader had to be transfered to E-class cause she beat someone up while trying to protect the other student and things like that, and Asano still being interested in reader even if they started dating Karma. Now how would Karma react when he finds it out??

Karma x Reader where Asano has a one sided crush!

(the first part is more explaining the backstory and then the second half of ur main request!!)

Omg I’m gonna cry I wrote this once and it didn’t save😭😭

TYSM for requesting!! I can’t tell you how fun this was this is like my favorite request I’ve ever gotten

First half ♡ the basis of your friendship with Asano!

Your thoughts on Kunugigaokas academic hierarchy had always aligned with Karmas rather than Asano’s, people were so much more than grades and the popularity came with it.

Asano saw you both in two different lights even if you clashed in opinions with him. You were too kind for your own good and were just seeing the best in people while Karma was, simply put, immature and impulsive in his eyes.

Even if you agreed with Karma on this one you were nothing alike, you couldn’t be.

Whenever you’d hear The Big 5 talk badly of any lower class student you’d tell them to quit it, the rest of the group would call you a buzz kill and reply with something along the lines of “People like them don’t deserve respect”.

(The big 5 is Asano and his main friend group and at the time yours too. They’re more like minions or henchmen to him but ya know)

This was the one type of occasion Asano would tell them to shut it.

“[Name] is right, don’t be so immature Seo, even if Eclass does deserve it.”

“Oh cmon you can’t seriously be taking [Name]’s side right no-“

“Didnt i tell you to shut up.”

“… ”

His favoritism towards you was very obvious (not that he was trying to be).

There were rumors going around saying you were dating and whatnot. His fan club was filled to the brim of pissed off girls who would kill to be in your place.

You’d been classmates with Karma before either of you were bumped down to end class but you were nothing more than desk mates, since he’d always ditch class early and never really talked to anyone other than Nagisa at the time.

Asano had advised you more than once to stay away from Karma, he’d tell you what were practically horror stories about Karmas insane fights and slightly (?) Criminal record.

Safe to say it kinda worked, you were intimidated.

“Really? ? He’s the reason Ren had a black eye last week??”

“Yeah, I’ve told you before- Akabane is more than insane.”

When you learned about further accounts from people other than Asano you’d realized Karma had only been standing up for people who’d been bullied. Your perspective on it all shifted. You had gained respect and admiration for Karma. What he was doing was kind in its own way and pretty chivalrous of him.

Even though you and Asano didn’t agree on much your friendship wasn’t something either of you we’re willing to throw away you’d been inseparable for years now, there wasn’t anything that could come between you, or so you thought.

When you got transferred to End Class for defending Hinano from an A class bully, Asano was surprised- he didn’t realize you’d be willing to take a hit to your record for something like this.

(I should add his fan club was over the moon when you got suspended they threw a little celebratory get together.)

Asano still texted you once in a while. It wasn’t the same as hanging out all the time like you used to.

Asano was having a dilemma, he liked hanging out with you but he told himself he couldn’t. He had an image to uphold for everyone in the main campus (and for himself in a way).

His text’s would be things like:

“Do good on the upcoming exams and they’ll want you right back in the main building. Goodluck!”

“Remember to study for next week [name]! unless you’d rather stay in end class.”

♡

— second half:

When Karma first met you he thought you were dating Asano and so did the rest of E class. You had to make it clear Asano and you are nothing more than friends, if you could even call him a friend anymore.

When they find out the reason you got suspended was the same as Karmas they opened up, It was hard having the entire school and faculty against them so it was nice seeing you give up on your main campus status like that in order to help someone else.

This was what first got Karma interested in getting to know you, you weren’t the type to get into fights yet you still did for someone else’s sake. You had maintained a perfect record all throughout school up until now.

Once you start dating, you literally mean the world to him because he feels like you’re the only person he can be completely open with.

WHEN ASANO FINDS OUT YOURE DATING he’s appalled.

Asano: Okay I just heard the craziest rumor you’re dating the Eclass psycho?? Text back asap

[name] : it’s true wdym

Asano: ??? Is he threatening you???

[name]: No??😭

(Omg wtf did I just enter my text fic era(the answer is no))

He genuinely thinks you’re trolling until he accidentally sees you hanging out together somewhere.

when Karma finds out Asano likes you even though you’re very much taken he’s very annoyed but he very quickly turns the annoyance into smugness when realizes he has the upper hand in the situation.

Okay his rival likes you, and HES dating you?? That’s literally the biggest win. It’s Jackpot.

100% rubs it in Asanos face during argument he has with him. He does it casually so Asano doesn’t see it as annoying or stupid but more truthful and hurtful.

“Try not to fail the exams this time around, I know it’s difficult for people as cocky as you to put effort in.”

“Oh don’t worry about my scores Asano, [name]’s helping me study so I’m sure I’ll do great!”

He’s doesn’t usually initiate PDA but the second Asano is in sight Karma will be draped all over you.

He doesn’t really like you talking to Asano because he doesn’t trust Asano to not be a douche but he won’t outright tell you not to because he doesn’t want to sound controlling or needy to you.

If he sees Asano texted you he’ll reply with a selfie of himself

“We’re busy right now☺️.”

Asano is more confused than anything, why would anyone want to go out with that guy out of everyone in the world.

They’ve definitely argued about it

“They only reason [Name] is dating you is out of pity I don’t know why you flaunt it around every chance you get.”

“How would you know? Does she tell you? Oh right you guys barely talk nowadays.”

It won’t escalate to a full on fist fight unless Asano actually tries flirting with you (which I don’t know if he’d be dumb or cocky enough to do 😭)

Like the second something out of line comes out of that dudes mouth Karma is swinging.

Karma makes sure to prove to you he can one up Asano on anything.

Oh Asano got all A’s on his report card? Karma asked Korosensei to make sure the + was added next to his.

Asano can cook really well? Call Karma Gordon Ramsey because he’s now a culinary professional.

Asano made it on the cover of Kunugigaokas student paper?

Karma literally just tutored a bunch of near failing students and helped them achieve perfect scores getting him front cover on next week’s paper. (He stopped right after he secured the spot on the paper he wasn’t about to actually help people like that for FREE 😭.)

♡ ♡ (that one audio just played in my head while writing this “damn… someone took my bitch..😔”)

#ansatsu kyoushitsu #karma akabane #akabane karma x reader #assassination classroom x reader #karma akabane headcannons #karma akabane x reader #karma x reader #assasination classroom #assassination classroom #akabane karma #assclass #asano gakushuu #asano x reader

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swee7dream · 5 months

Text

slowly but surely zhong chenle x f!reader | 2.3k words

summary: it's the end of the year but you are finding it very difficult to be in celebratory mood.

genre: angst & fluff :3

warnings: internalized anti-agere kinda ?? not rly lolz super quick mention of a panic attack but not in depth. lmk if i missed any !!!

dni: if you sexualize age regression and/or have an 18+ blog.

You’re going to quit your job.

You are, you’re making a promise to yourself about it and you have already decided to honor the promises you make to yourself this coming year. You are going to quit your job and nothing is going to stand in your way this time.

Only your boss would talk about an end-of-year party as a ‘compulsory team meeting’. You were supposed to have a nice simple evening with Chenle at home, making dinner together and then watching the fireworks until one of you falls asleep. A nice simple evening that did not have you hyperventilating in the bathroom out of fear you would be let go.

The plan was to stop by the store as soon as you finished your shift to ensure you got the freshest ingredients for the pesto pasta recipe you found on Pinterest and get more than the advised portions because you know for a fact half of it will end up on your kitchen floor when the play-fighting gets out of hand.

It was meant to be a night of relaxing and reflecting and not any of what you are feeling right now: stressed, angry, and murderous.

You take a sniff of your clothes as you walk from the bus stop back home, wondering if you can still wear this jacket out tomorrow or if you’ll smell like you bathed in alcohol fully dressed. Moisture seeps through your boot and into your sock from a puddle you didn’t notice on the sidewalk a couple of minutes back and you feel your entire body rejecting the sensation.

You mumble to yourself while doing quick work of inputting the PIN code to your front door lock, squeezing your eyes tight in an attempt to bring moisture back to your dried-out eyes.

‘Bath, color, cuddle, sleep. Bath, color, cuddle, sleep. Bath, color, cuddle, sleep!’

The plan for the night repeats like a broken record in your mind, mentally pushing yourself to go on just a little longer. You let out a sigh of relief when the lock finally sings its tune of entrance after three failed attempts.

“There’s my girl. I thought someone was trying to break in or something.”

The mental image of you talking with your dolls and stuffed animals shatters like a priceless vase, the shards amounting to the grains of sand in the sea.

“Hi.” You drop your bag on the floor the second you have a foot inside. You were so excited about tonight, how could you forget so quickly? Your boyfriend is so excited to see you and all you can think about is how you want everyone to die, that’s rich.

“Hey.” Chenle’s smile drops at your lack of enthusiasm. “You okay?”

“Okay… Just tired. ‘m gonna take a bath, ‘kay?” Your lips barely part as you speak and your feet don’t lift an inch from the floor, shuffling down the hallway instead. Tongue trapped between your teeth, you stop yourself from saying something you’ll regret on the way to the bathroom.

—

Your own gasp wakes you and you find that you’ve fallen asleep in the tub. How long have you been asleep? The water’s not exactly warm anymore and you see your fingertips have pruned up like raisins. You poke at them while leaning over the edge before sighing. Chenle’s out there waiting for you, you remind yourself, you can’t just stay pruned up like this forever.

Only for a little bit longer. You hug your knees to your chest and rest your cheek on one of them as you watch all the water from your bath swirl down the drain like a whirlpool. You can’t help but blow your lips together, mimicking the sounds you think pirates caught in a whirlpool would make.

A knock at the door.

“Everything alright in there?”

“Uh, yeah. Sorry. I’m getting dressed now. I’ll be right there.” The sound of your voice surprises you, feeling it’s much deeper than it should be for some reason.

The heat coming up from the vents is still too cold for you and although you know you should keep moving to feel warm, you find it much more comfortable to just stand in place on the rug.

Water drips off you and onto the rug and the towel wrapped tight around you where you shiver. Your hair is wet and heavy and if looks could kill, the shirt you planned to change into would be on fire at the moment. The feeling of heavy, damp hair wetting your new shirt makes you roll your eyes a bit, but the knowledge of your boyfriend on the other side of the door pushes you to endure it.

You’re in your own home but you sure don’t act like it, shuffling shyly out of the bathroom with uncertain steps.

“Le?”

“Oh.” He looks up from the shelf he was carefully inspecting before. “Hey baby. Good bath?”

“…yeah. What are you holding?”

“This?” He lifts his hand. “It’s one of your crayons. I found it lying on the floor and was just looking where to put it back.”

“It’s not mine,” You state firmly with a swift snatch. “It’s my nephew’s. He came over recently.”

“…your nephew colors with glitter crayons?” Chenle tries not to eye the grip you have that crayon in.

“Yeah. He does. Is that a problem?” You tuck the crayon into the pocket of your pajama pants quickly and make your way over to the kitchen.

“It’s not a problem, I just didn’t know he moved on so fast from his ‘arts and crafts is boring’ stage.”

“He’s coming around to it.” You move around the kitchen quickly, filling and turning on the kettle.

“Good for him.” Chenle stands slowly, when did his back start hurting like this? Is he getting old? Well, he is already balding. But that’s because of the hair dye, right? It’ll grow back. Probably.

“Yeah.” You toss a tea bag into a mug. “That’s just how kids are. Thank you for finding it.”

“Mhm.”

He takes notice of how you haven’t made eye contact with him since you snatched the crayon from him, how you still don’t. You try cracking your knuckles and wrists again and again, ignoring the fact that you already did before and nothing will pop for the next while or so.

You’re lying.

Why are you lying?

“Well, now I’m jealous.” Chenle leans on the counter with his forearms, teasing smile gently nudging you to at least look his way. “How come that little kid gets to color with my girlfriend when even I haven’t done that before?”

You don’t reply but his eyes follow how you swallow an invisible lump in your throat.

“It’s not like we have the ingredients to cook dinner tonight anyway, why don’t we just spend our home date tonight just coloring? You have more crayons, right?”

“No,” You reply immediately, turning away to get the kettle when it dings. “He just left this one. Why would I have any crayons? Do you think I’m a five-year-old?”

“I never said that.” He stands up, a frown of confusion painting his face.

“Right. Well, I don’t have any of those. And I don’t want to do a coloring date. I’m dating an adult, I would like to feel like I am.”

“Adults can color.”

“No they can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because they can’t.”

The kitchen is quiet, the single noise of the spoon mixing the tea and honey in your mug. With each second of silence, the control you have on your breathing weakens.

You do want to color. You want to doodle and draw and give Chenle all your stickman drawings. You want him to show you his pictures and you want to hear him praise the color you chose for the sun’s sunglasses. You want him to color with you and play with you until you’re all tired out. When you’re asleep you want him to cradle you and cuddle you, kiss you on the forehead, and hum you lullabies in an undertone.

But it’s also so unreasonable to demand that.

He has a life just as stressful if not more than yours, to throw all your burdens on him to bear, even if just for a few hours, is wrong. You would feel too guilty. Chenle’s dating an adult, not babysitting a child. Dating you should be an option, not a burden.

“They can’t?”

“They can’t.” You shake your head, voice breaking.

Chenle takes you into arms before you fully break, leaving all your tears to stain his t-shirt. His fingers dig into your hair and your whole body shivers when you feel his nails gently scratch against your scalp.

“I’m going to be honest with you, Princess, I don’t really know what happened today. Or if it’s something you’ve been dealing with for a long time… Either way, I’m sorry. If I’m the reason you’re crying right now, I’m sorry. And I’m also sorry for not knowing what I’ve done wrong. I’m kind of slow on the uptake at times. If I’m not the reason you’re crying, I’m sorry you went through that, or, are going through that. I don’t really know…

“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. You looked like you were about to drop dead as soon as you walked in tonight so I wouldn’t blame you. I probably should have left earlier but I couldn’t help it. It’s the last day of the year and I really wanted to spend it with you. I’m kind of clingy like that, I guess. I was on my way here and… I was thinking how I would be ending this year and starting this next year with you and- and I wanted this to be how every year will be. Forever. Or, until you don’t it want to. Because I don’t feel like I will ever not want to be with you. I’m like… obsessed with you. But not to a point where I won’t leave if you tell me to leave. I definitely will leave if you ask me to leave. Do you want me to go? I can go. You look tired and I’m keeping you up-”

“No.” You interrupt, speaking into his chest. “Stay.”

“Okay. Yeah, I’ll stay.”

“But… I think I am gonna nap.”

“Yeah… Yeah, you should. I’ll just stay out here.”

“You’re an idiot.” You blurt. “A big dumb idiot. You’re dumb.”

“…yeah.”

“Want you to nap with me. Cuddle. Carry me.”

“Carry you…?” Chenle looks down at you, feeling whiplash at how quickly your moods change. He doesn’t question it though, melting at the sight of your big watery eyes. “Yeah, okay. Your wish is my command.”

You smile as you feel his arms wrap around you, his cologne entering your nose and giving you an incomparable high. His steps are slow and uncertain, careful to not hit your head on any doorframes. He begins lowering you onto the bed but your arms don’t loosen around his neck.

“Sorry too.” You whisper.

“For what?”

“Callin’ you dumb. You’re not dumb.”

“Thank you.” Chenle smiles, his eyes disappearing into thin little moons. “But, I am actually a little dumb.”

“No.” You frown as if the person offended was you. “Not dumb.”

“No?”

“No.” You insist. “’m the dummy.”

“What? No, Princess.” He sits on the side of the bed when his neck begins to hurt from the angle. “How could you think that?”

“’Cause,” Your eyes drop to his shirt, suddenly extremely interested in the wrinkles of his shirt. “Dunno. Thought you wouldn’t like me.”

“Wouldn’t like you? Baby, why would I not like you?”

“’Cause ‘m a dummy!” You whisper-yell at him as if he wasn’t listening. “Was bein’ mean earlier and takin’ stuff and… just wasn’t bein’ nice. And then I thought that you wouldn’t like me if I… I dunno.”

“If what?”

“If there was like… a side o’ me you didn’t really like. ‘n’ I scared you away… Don’t wanna be a bother, y’know?”

“You’re not a bother, Baby.” Chenle presses a kiss to your temple. “You’re my responsibility. I choose to do all these things. You’re never a bother. Never ever. Even if you get sick or get kicked out of your house or… I don’t know. No matter what, I choose to stay with you.”

“What if you choose to stop staying with me?”

“Did you kill someone?”

“No?”

“Then I think we can work through it.”

You giggle and lean back into him. He says such silly things with such confidence that he almost makes you believe it. Maybe one day you will.

“Oh shoot, your tea. I’ll be right back.”

The bed creaks under you as he gets up, the fireworks of overly-zealous celebrators with seemingly broken clocks lighting up his side profile pinks and purples through the window.

You stare at him and feel a warmth grow deep in your heart, an uncontrollable smile painted on your face. Chenle looks back at you with a confused smile, but you can see the same love in your heart in his eyes.

Yeah.

You also think that this is right. You don’t know if it’s for forever yet, but you sure hope it will be. That this year and the next and all the years until you’re both stars in the sky you two will be together. The fireworks will light up your faces when you’re both wrinkly and gray, wearing the same dorky grins you wear tonight.

You’re afraid, but you can feel that soon you’ll introduce a new side of yourself to Chenle. As he gets in the bed with you, looking out the window of your bedroom with his arm around your waist, the anxiety is the tiniest bit smaller than it was this morning. Slowly but surely, you know in your heart the day when you can show your heart bare to him will come and you’re not afraid

Maybe you’re afraid now but you know it’s only a matter of time before you free fall into his arms without a second thought. It's inevitable, you smile to yourself.

a/n: STRESSING to post this before the new year lolz. also, i hope y'all know that reader was toned down SO much over the drafts. when i get overstimulated i start wanting ppl to die and it's never that serious...... i rly had to get rid of that quality when writing for reader LOLOLOL OK ENJOY REBLOG GIVE KUDOS ALL THAT STUFF THAT TUMBLR LIKES LOVE U ALL HOPE U HAVE THE BESTEST 2024

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vagabond-umlaut · 7 months

Text

verglas

A thin coating of glaze ice on rock, formed by freezing rain hitting the tough surface.

▸ Yakuza Head Gojo x Personal Assistant Reader; Protective Gojo; Insecure Gojo; A Smidgen of Toxic Gojo [If You Squint]; Mentions of Violence [Not Towards Reader!!!]; Reader Is Very Sweet & Understanding But... :)); Lying & Manipulation; A Not-Really-Angst But With A Definitely-Happy-Ending; NOTHING IS WHAT YOU THINK IT IS :D

▸ The image, divider and characters used ain't mine. Please don't plagiarize, translate or repost this. Enjoy reading! ❤️

"Shut. Up."

"Say that to those phones going ballistic in your office, Gojo."

An exasperated sigh sounding in the quiet of the breakroom, Satoru pinches the bridge of his nose with one hand and pours the seventh packet of sugar into his coffee with the other– before he sighs again, resigned this time, and turns to throw the woman sipping tea on the couch, a piercing glare.

"Whoever the fuck you choose, they better be as efficient and reliable as Nanami was. And be very clear on the temporary nature of this job. I don't want ANY nagging from this new P.A., when Nanami returns in a month— Okay?"

Shoko's face shifts into a smile too wide to not be scary. "Okay, Boss!"

This Was A Mistake.

The biggest one ever made by Satoru in his twenty nine years of life.

Yet he does nothing but groan under his breath when you hand him a cup of coffee and the documents needed for the next meeting, a grin resting on your lips which grows brighter when his fingertips come in contact with yours while taking the cup and he mutters a thanks with an equally small smile– only for it to twist into a scowl when you leave the room.

Suguru erupts into a fit of snickers, which turns into howling laughter when Satoru pins him with a deathly glare. The latter barely stops his hands from reaching across the table, to snap the bastard's neck into halves.

The former wipes a tear from the corner of his eyes. "You're wayy too obvious, you know that? Looking all concerned and worried for her— you think she won't be able to survive this world, don't you?"

His best friend's words makes Satoru's eyes widen behind his glasses before he forces a scoff out.

"Don't be ridiculous, Suguru," he says, taking a sip of his coffee, then scrunching his nose from how less sweet it tastes. He decides to pay no attention to it for the time, choosing to focus his mind on another much more pressing issue at hand as he takes a breath and resumes.

"I don't think so. I know so. Have you even seen her? She looks too bright and good for something as dark and cursed as our world of crime. You think she'll be able to stomach everything? Ha!!" he lets loose a huff, shaking his head, "Hearing how bad this is and seeing everything for herself— it won't even be a week before she leaves."

Suguru's teasing grin devolving into one of sympathy, the man offers a comforting squeeze on his palm– not that it does anything to quell the storm within the other man's insides or whatever. The latter gives him a tight smile in return.

"You don't think she will leave, right?"

"Not at all, you loser," the black-haired man reassures, eyes crinkling in a smile, "Just tone down how very obvious you are. You might not want her to discover the evil, but your attached ass might just make that happen– and not in a nice pleasant way— you get it, don't you?"

A terse nod is the only reply Satoru finds he can gather to the query.

Okay, maybe [just maybe], appointing you wasn't a mistake after all.

Fondness strums Satoru's heartstrings, stretching and dimpling his cheeks, at the celebratory sight he finds on walking out the elevator:

You, wearing a party hat a bit too big for you, grinning at the camera held by Toge while Nobara and Yuuji stand on either side of you, two matching beams on both their faces; all the while Maki yells at Yuuta in the background for what-must-be-his-tenth-fault-of-the-day; and Shoko and Kusakabe quietly observe the scene from the side, with a paper cup each of what, the white-haired man is certain, is alcohol—

A call of his name draws the man's attention from the party before to the frowning boy beside— confusion swimming in the latter's eyes as they dart between the tiny crowd before and his mentor, and he asks, "Am I forgetting anyone's birthday today?"

"Oh no," Satoru is quick to shake his head with a chuckle— he knows enough of your hatred for the current season from the rants you have showered him in, ever since he has known you– a shudder runs down his spine, thinking how intense your rants would have been were your birthday in this horrible season as well!— "My assistant finished three weeks of her job here, so everyone is throwing her a party."

"I see," Megumi hums, nodding thoughtfully, before looking ahead at his friends, more specifically Yuuji when the pink-haired boy yells out a boisterous 'Oi Fushiguro! When did you return?'

"Today morning," The addressed boy answers, then turns to you with a small smile, "Congratulations and many thanks on dealing with the idiot for so long, in Nanami-san's absence. We were scared this place might get burnt down when we were told of his month-long holiday."

"That or few of us going to the mental hospital three blocks away and few of us to jail for murdering Gojo," Nobara adds with a chuckle that sounds much less cheery and friendly to your boss, than you told she is on meeting the girl the first time, "Seriously, Assistant-san! You are a lifesaver to so many people."

"Aww, you two adorable kids!!" you coo, bringing the grumpy boy and the bubbly girl into a hug, "I never thought, y'all would think so highly of me!! To know, all of you think so many nice things of me— I am the happiest person on earth right now– no one's allowed to inquire that!"

"Well, you're not just those but our lucky charm too!!!"

Yuuta's voice sounds from the top of the ladder, while he fixes the too many paper decorations hanging from the ceiling, "There hasn't been one occurence of anything bad ever since you joined the office!— Not one shoot-out, not one assassination attempt– Hell– We did not even find a spy— even though there was such a huge deal Gojo-san had to sign with the Kamo's— by the way, it went well, didn't it, Sensei?"

"Of course, it did, kid!" Satoru sends the boy's nervous question a big toothy grin and thumbs-up, then turns to you with a smirk, "Though, I wonder how well my assistant might fare were she to come face-to-face with such scary things— what do ya think, sweetheart?"

Your brows rise for less than a beat before settling down, the same moment your radiant grin simmers down to a minor twitch of your lips— Satoru's heart makes an erratic thrash against the boundary set by his ribcage whilst his stomach gets aflutter when you shoot him a long look– certainly not one suited for a public setting.

Head tilting to the side, you murmur, "I've already read the terms and conditions, so I think I can handle them just fine— Sir."

"What is wrong wi— hey!"

The shock in your tone being swallowed by the loud slam of the door, Satoru wastes no time in locking it before pulling you in to cage your form between himself and the wall.

If he thinks rationally, the man will know there is no reason for him to be so enraged, no reason for him to be so furious—

No reason for him to pull you away from the banquet hall to this room multiple corridors away from the grand dinner party of the Gojo's and the Kamo's– providing enough fodder to feed the gossipmongers and their next twenty generations–

The problem is there's no ounce of rationality left in him— not since that pathetic third son of one of his allies tried to chat you up— and certainly not since that utter waste of space and oxygen went to hit you for politely rejecting him time and again— the very sight of your features twisted in terror enough to awaken the slumbering beast in the man— and make it snatch control from his more humane side—

"Hey," The whispered word accompanied by the delicious feel of nails raking across his undercut jolts him out his mind, making his gaze go clearer– go redder– as he trains it on your visibly worried face, "Are—"

"Happy seeing me turn into a monster, honey?" Satoru hisses, cutting you off and pushing you further into the wall, as he leans down to get into your space.

Fingers digging into your waist whilst the other hand curls into a fist above your head, he finds himself wear a smile, so wide and crooked, cooing, "Or are you cursing yourself for entering this world in the first place, sweet cheeks? Feeling sorry for mingling with someone as bad as the one before you now, don't ya??"

"Satoru—" you begin, voice wavering and weakening, the man notes– but he finds himself uncaring as he clicks his tongue and tuts, "Don't think you can 'Satoru' out of this one, darling— I know whatever your sweet voice spouts next will be nothing but lies fuelled by fear. Those gorgeous eyes of yours are sooo filled with panic– tell me," he croons.

"Will you be bowing out right now? Or tomorrow? First thing in the—"

"And what if I say I won't ever leave, 'cause I love seeing my husband go crazy protecting me?"

Your question reaches him as nothing more than a hushed breath of the wind entering through the open window yet it proves to be more than capable in stilling Satoru. Fist unclenching, and mouth opening and closing a few times, he struggles to choke out an ask of surprise, except you don't let him.

Hand gliding from his neck to his front, fingers grasping and crinkling the ironed white shirt, you yank your husband towards yourself– eyes not leaving his for once, the dewy sheen in those putting him under a spell– not that he wasn't already bewitched by a tiny mention of your name, or the faintest glimpse of your figure.

Lower lip trembling a little, you continue, the same hushed as before.

"And what if I say I won't ever leave, 'cause I love seeing my husband being who he really is— and not some weird warped version, all half-truths and half-lies— Ever since we started going out, and even now, four years into our married life–"

Your chest heaves in a heavy sigh, its softness still tangible through your sky-blue dress when it touches his chest and deflates. You ask.

"What if I say I'm never going to leave you nor stop loving you— Not caring if you're my sweetest 'Toru caressing me with those hands of yours— Or, if you're the notorious Six Eyes, almost killing a guy with those same hands, just to safeguard me—"

A slow beat passes, wherein you slide a palm up to cup his cheek and smile, soft and sure and soothing, "What if I promise you all this, what will you do, Satoru?"

"Will you still hide stuff from me?? Become angrily silent, whenever I try to figure them out by myself— like I did, requesting Nanami to go on a vacation, just so I can become your P.A., to know who you really are as the notorious 'Yakuza King'— will you still stay mad at me, like these last few weeks, hm??"

Guilt pinches his features and twists his insides at the heart-rending quality of your query, and the memories it pushes to the surface– so cold, so dark, so lonely...

Satoru forces out a quivery exhale, fingers flexing on your lower back and drawing you even closer to himself— but never sufficiently close to your love, of course.

He drops his head to rest it in the crook of your neck, mumbling, "You serious on promising not to leave me, sweets?"

"One hundred percent," Your chuckling voice reaches him in less than a moment. Only to grow breathy, when he drags the tip of his tongue over your pulse point— a move which never not turns your legs into a jelly, very very much to your husband's glee—

A restrained whimper of his name pulling Satoru away from his self-assigned mission of suffocating you in love and praise, he raises his gaze to find your pretty lips puckered in a pout, before parting in an adorable grumble, "I blabbered so much but you didn't even tell me what you'll be doing, should I pro–"

"Shhhh..." Your husband shushes you with a finger on your lips, heart swelling manifold when you shoot him a fatally cute confused look as a response. Satoru's cheeks stretch in one of the most genuine grins, felt by the man in seemingly forever.

He bends to brush his lips with yours, lowering his voice to a murmur.

So hungry. So thirsty. So happy.

Solely for you.

"With the terms and conditions all accepted now, it's time I serve and please my lady to the fullest, yeah?"

Yeah, yeah, yeah— you and Satoru sure solve your conflicts happily that night— but poor Kento has to return three days early from his family vacation in Malaysia– only because Suguru & Shoko cannot handle the aftermath of the SPECTACLE made by The Arctic King Of Yakuza hurrying away from the banquet, 'holding hands' with his new P.A., then returning with her an hour later and announcing: SHE IS HIS WIFE—

Quite unsurprisingly, your hubby 'Toru is nearly killed in his office the next morning by his three closest friends since forever– the word nearly there in the sentence only due to your [un]timely intervention. :))

▸ series: tang!

▸ masterlist

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brbsoulnomming · 7 months

Text

Tell Me Sweet Little Lies Part 23

-----

They're on the front page for about a week.

They run the stories of Hopper and Henry Creel simultaneously - honestly, Eddie kind of thinks the fact that Hopper was presumed dead and is now back makes it easier for people to believe a previously assumed dead guy is the top suspect for the murders.

Eddie gets barely a mention clearing him of all charges. There's a couple of articles about him and Steve fighting off Henry Creel, but the focus is more on Steve than anything else.

Steve bitches about it, about how they did the same thing after Starcourt, but Eddie's kind of glad his name isn't plastered all over the place anymore.

He and Steve are down in the kitchen scrounging up celebratory snacks and beers - Steve has a clean bill of health, and Eddie's stitches are coming out in a few days - when the phone rings.

"Harrington residence, this is Steve speaking," he greets.

Eddie barely has time to decide he's absolutely going to tease him about that later when the response comes - loud enough for him to hear it.

"Steven, my boy!" the voice booms, spirited and affable.

Steve closes his eyes, the muscles in his jaw tightening. "Hi, Dad."

"We just heard the news!" Steve's father says. "Why didn't you call to tell us? Did the earthquake damage anything?"

Part of Eddie thinks he should leave. Or at least back away, so he can't hear everything that's being said - but the other part of him thinks that Steve'd push him away if he didn't want him here, and with how tense Steve's gone next to him, Eddie can't bring himself to pull away.

"The house is fine," Steve says. "Loch Nora didn't get hit at all."

"Good, good," Mr. Harrington says. "Your mother hears you and Rachel have been volunteering with the relief efforts?"

Eddie didn't think it was possible, but Steve goes even stiffer.

"Robin," he corrects, his tone smooth and entirely void of inflection. "Yes, we've been coordinating donations."

"That's what I want to hear!" There's a sound like a loud clap. "I'm glad to see you're taking this seriously. You had a lot of ground to make up for, but it seems giving you a dose of reality has paid off. We'll be able to have some real talks about your future soon. What? Oh, your mother wants to talk to you."

There's a shuffling noise, then a quieter and much less friendly voice greets, "Steven."

"Hey Mom," Steve's posture relaxes a little. "I told Dad we made it out okay."

There's some kind of response, but Steve's mom is too quiet for Eddie to make it out.

"No, of course I didn't file charges. I knew you'd want to handle it if anything else happened." A pause. "Yes, that Carver. Mom, it's not - yeah. Yeah, okay. No, it's just him. I think he's just mad that people listened to me and not him. Yeah, I - all right. Bye."

He hangs up the phone, leaning in with one arm braced against the wall, a long line of tension.

"Steve?" Eddie says quietly.

Steve turns to face him, giving a little crooked smile. "You can ask if you want. I don't mind you and Robin knowing. It's… easier sometimes, if she expects it, and it's probably the same with you."

Eddie aches a little. "What was your dad talking about? What ground to make up for?"

Steve makes a face. "I did a lot of damage to the Harrington image the last bit of high school, you know. Stopped caring about my reputation, didn't get accepted into any of the colleges they wanted me to go to, kept getting into fights."

"But that wasn't - did they even ask you what actually happened?" Eddie asks.

"They don't care what actually happened," Steve replies. "Just what it looked like. Like I said, it's all about appearances with them. My dad's the main reason I worked at Scoops instead of being a lifeguard again last summer - he says it's because I needed a real life experience, learn what it means to work at the bottom, but he was just pissy and trying to humiliate me. He talks a big game about working hard, but all he really cares about is how I make them look. Now that I've gotten good press twice, he's happy again."

Eddie's mouth opens, then closes, then opens again. "He didn't even ask if you were okay."

Steve shrugs. "I looked fine in the papers."

Right.

Appearances.

"Will you be mad at me if I punch your dad if I ever see him?" Eddie asks.

Steve laughs, a surprised little sound like he's startled by it. "No," he says. "But only if I get to punch yours for leaving you."

Oh.

If Eddie was thinking about it, he'd have moved slowly, making sure to telegraph what he was doing so he didn't startle Steve, but he reacts on instinct and pulls Steve into a hug.

Steve doesn't even flinch at the sudden motion. He just melts into it, letting Eddie wrap him up and hold him tightly. His arms come up to cross over Eddie's shoulder blades, the placement automatically mindful of his injuries in the way only someone who's bandaged them multiple times could be.

"Sometimes I wish they just wouldn't call at all," Steve admits, face buried in Eddie's neck. It comes out in a rush, like he hadn't really thought about it before he said it, but he's getting it out anyway. "That they'd just cut me out of their life, instead of stringing me along."

"Fuck them," Eddie says. "I've got you."

He can hear Steve swallow, and Steve hugs him tighter.

They stay like that for a long while, until Eddie finally pulls back.

"Hey," he says softly. "I'll get the food and stuff. Go upstairs and see Robin."

Steve looks uncertain. "You sure?"

Eddie hugs him one more time. "You've got two soulmates," he murmurs. "Let us take care of you a little, okay?"

Steve squeezes him tight, then lets go with a nod before heading upstairs.

Eddie dithers in the kitchen for a bit, taking an extra long time. Whatever his complicated feelings are, it doesn't bother him at all to give Steve and Robin some space like this.

They're talking when he comes back, which isn't a surprise, and he hears his own name as he gets closer to the bedroom. Eddie pauses, even though he shouldn't, listening through the cracked door. He'll feel worse about it later, probably, but right now the masochistic side of him can't resist the urge to know what they're saying about him.

"I want him so much, Robs," he hears Steve saying, low and soft like he's trying to be quiet.

"I know," Robin replies, her tone somehow managing to be both gentle and snarky at the same time. "It's kind of pathetic."

Steve lets out a muffled groan. "Not helping. I don't exactly have the greatest track record at being able to get over people! I thought, with my soulmate-"

He cuts off, and Eddie can't help the bubbling anger that springs up. Steve thought? Has he stopped for one second to think about how Eddie might feel, only ever having a platonic soulmate? Wanting him just as bad and not being able to have him, not being able to have anyone?

"-someone else?" Robin is saying, like she's reading his thoughts, and Eddie has to hold his breath as he makes sure he hadn't accidentally said that outloud.

"I don't want anyone else," Steve says miserably. "Just him. I think - I think it's always going to be him. Fuck, why does this have to be so complicated?"

There's a heavy, thick silence, and Eddie's anger simmers and crackles under his skin, the way it always does when there's a hefty mixing of guilt in it.

"Do you think-" Robin starts, then stops. "Do you wish-" She stops again, voice thick with emotion. "Would it be easier if we-"

"No," Steve says, cutting her off at the same time that Eddie realizes what she's probably trying to bring herself to ask.

There's the muffled sound of shuffling, quiet hitching breaths - probably the motions of Steve trying to reassure one of his soulmates that he wants her, and he imagines him gathering her close, pressing soft kisses anywhere he can reach, cutting off anything she tries to say with a deeper, fiercer kiss.

Eddie bites the inside of his cheek so hard he tastes copper to keep himself from making some kind of sound to give himself away. He hates that he doesn't know what he's feeling - hates that he thinks he's jealous of Robin just as much as he doesn't feel jealous of her, not really. He's jealous of the images he conjures when he thinks about them together, but he's never actually jealous when he's with them, when he watches them.

That reminder makes him shift, peeking through the cracked door so he can see them. They're sitting facing each other, legs all tangled together. One of Steve's hands is covering Robin's heart, and the other is curled around one of Robin's hands, pinning it to his chest over his own heart, and their foreheads are pressed together.

Something in Eddie settles in a way he can't explain, all thoughts of jealousy gone.

"There's no me without you," Steve is saying. "You're a part of me, Robs, I can't do this without either of you."

She says something too muffled for Eddie to make out.

"I'm happy. I really am, I promise. I love you, I love us, exactly the way we are. And with Eddie-"

Eddie leans forward, too desperate to know what he's going to say to worry about being caught.

"I don't need anything else other than just him. However I can have him. If it's never romantic, if this is us forever - it doesn't matter, not really. I just need you and him, and the kids, and I'm good."

There's silence, the two of them just completely wrapped up in each other, and fuck, Eddie - he thinks you know what, if this is it, if what he has is Steve and Robin and the kids forever, then he's good, too.

"I love you, Robin Buckley," Steve says. "In a way I never realized was possible, until you and that dumb kid showed up in my life and taught me that you don't have to do anything to earn someone's love. That sometimes, it's just unconditional."

Steve was sixteen when he fought his first demogorgon, Eddie remembers that. Which means he couldn't have been any younger than that when he started really spending any time with Dustin or Robin, which means - the same thing that Eddie went through when he first moved in with Uncle Wayne, the thing that was so impossible for him to believe at twelve, Steve wasn't shown until he was probably seventeen.

Fuck, his heart aches.

"Does Henderson know he was your first true love?" Robin asks, her voice a little wet, but obviously trying to make things a little lighter.

Steve laughs, the sound just a bit thick. "No, and he'd be insufferable if I told him."

There's the faint sting of a new lie being written on the back of his calf, and the second he registers it, he hears Robin's startled laughter. Eddie pulls back from the door, sucking in a deep breath and letting it out, trying to get himself back under control.

"Oh my God, Steve, you did tell him! When?"

He can hear Steve sputtering and deflecting, the sound of Robin smacking him and Steve scrambling - probably trying to avoid them - and if there was ever going to be a good time to announce his return after shamelessly listening in for too long, now is probably it.

Eddie pushes open the door, six pack under one arm and bags of popcorn and chips under the other as he shoots a hopefully only slightly manic grin at them. "What's Steve lying about now?"

"Nothing!" Steve says too quickly.

Sloppy, for him, considering Eddie knows how good Steve usually is at using sarcasm or half truths to avoid telling lies, so Eddie tosses the bag of popcorn at him.

He catches it easily, of course, but it means he's now vulnerable to Robin's attacks, and he has to swerve to avoid another slap to his shoulder.

"Steve's trying to pretend like we both didn't get that lie, too," Robin says.

Steve groans. "Fine, Jesus. It was back when we were waiting at the camper, and Dustin was upset. I told him that he was the first person who was ever just - there, in my life because he wanted to be, even after he didn't need me to fight demodogs. No one could ever replace him."

"You're such a sap, Steve," Eddie teases him as he comes to sit next to him and Robin.

"Shut up," Steve grumbles. "That's it, I'm picking the movie."

—

The next day, Lucas and Max swing by. Steve hauls a basketball stand out of the garage and sets it up in the driveway, and Eddie sits at the kitchen table, eating a bologna sandwich while he watches them play.

It's safer inside, where there's no one to see if he gets affected by Steve's tank top and shorts.

Or at least, he thought it was safer inside.

"Do you love Steve?" Max asks, plopping down beside him.

Eddie chokes on his Coke, and she stares at him unsympathetically until he manages to breathe again.

"He's my soulmate, so." Eddie shrugs.

Max gives him an unimpressed look, and yeah, okay, he figures they both know soulmates aren't a guarantee of anything. Eddie's parents were soulmates, after all, loved each other more than anything else in this world, and that still hadn't been enough.

"I wanted him to be my soulmate before I knew it was him," he admits, because that's a more true answer without actually having to say yes or no. "Nothing's happened since to change that."

She gets this look on her face like she's trying to decide if that's an acceptable response. After a moment, she rests her chin on her knees, staring out the window, and Eddie figures he's in the clear.

"Steve has two soulmates," she says after a while. "You don't. Doesn't that make you feel - I don't know, like you aren't enough?"

"Jesus Christ, Red, you're not pulling any punches today, are you?" Eddie swears.

He doesn't actually want to have this conversation. It's not something he's completely sorted out on his own, yet, even though he's done a lot of thinking on it, and he's tempted to tell her to mind her own business.

But she won't look at him, and he knows why she's asking. She's not talking about him and Steve and Robin, not really.

He thinks about telling her something standard about soulmates, or maybe even the advice that his uncle gave him, but it doesn't feel right.

"It's not what I always imagined," Eddie admits slowly.

Max doesn't say anything, but he watches the way she starts to unwind a little, how she doesn't hold herself so stiff, tilts a little to actually listen to what he's saying.

"You know Steve and I talked to each other when we were younger. We thought the same way about a lot of stuff, and I had this idea in my head that he was some little outcast like me, in another small town somewhere out there, that we'd move to a big city and find each other. But then we stopped talking."

"How come?" Max asks, looking caught up despite herself.

Eddie grins at her, wide and self depreciating. "I found out he was probably some rich, popular jerk, and decided I hated him."

And there's that unimpressed look again.

"Yeah, yeah," Eddie grumbles. "Let's just say there might be some truth to not talking with your soulmate before you actually meet them. Point is, for almost five years, I hated my soulmate. Thought the best I could hope for was that we'd meet when we were thirty and ancient, and maybe then he would have changed. Then a little while ago, I met Steve."

Max's brows furrow. "You met Steve way before that."

"Nah," he says. "I knew of Steve. I had a lot of assumptions about him, knew what I thought he was, but I didn't know the real Steve. That Steve I met when he helped explain all of this to me and didn't make me feel stupid for not picking up some of it right away, even after I held a broken bottle to his throat."

She snorts, but looks like she's considering that. "I met him when he was putting himself between me, Lucas, and Dustin and a hoard of demodogs, a couple of hours after calling them dickheads and me some random girl."

Eddie salutes her with his can of Coke, half in understanding and half to cover the way his heart wants to melt again. "That Steve was nothing like I imagined my soulmate to be, when I was daydreaming about him or hating him. But I knew I didn't want anyone else, and Steve having another soulmate doesn't change that. I don't think it makes what he feels for me any less than what I feel for him, and I don't think it means I'm less important to him than he is to me."

Max frowns. "Really, or are you just saying that?"

"Really," Eddie says, though he hadn't actually been sure it was true until he heard himself say it. "I'm not saying it's not hard sometimes. And sometimes I get in my head about it. But I wouldn't change it. Steve wouldn't be the same without Robin, you know? He wouldn't be the Steve that made me want him to be my soulmate so bad."

There's a long moment of silence. Then, "Would you be saying that if both of his soulmates were romantic?"

Eddie's glad he stopped drinking, because he knows he would have choked again. For a split second, she wonders if she's picked up on - but no, that still isn't what this about. "Are both of yours romantic?"

Her jaw juts forward, arms hugging tighter around her knees. "What if they were?"

Fuck, he doesn't know what to say to that. "It's okay to like both guys and girls," he says, because he feels like that's the most important bit. "I do. I mean, mostly guys, but sometimes girls."

Her grip loosens a little, but she still doesn't say anything.

"It sounds like maybe I'm not the one you should be talking to about that," he says carefully.

She scowls. "I talked to Steve already."

Right, of course she did.

"What did Steve say?"

"Steve said he thinks the line between platonic and romantic soulmates isn't as straightforward as people like to pretend it is. That sometimes what you might think should be romantic is actually platonic, and sometimes what you think should be platonic is romantic, and sometimes there's going to be things that blur the lines and you don't really know which one it is. He said it was okay to have two platonic or two romantic or one of each or, like, any combination." She makes a face here, like she's not entirely sure what he meant by any combination - or like she was sure, and didn't need that much detail. "That as long as everyone was communicating, it was okay to do whatever worked for us."

Eddie swallows. "Steve sounds pretty smart."

Max rolls her eyes. "He has his moments."

"So… are you communicating with Lucas and El?" he asks.

She picks at a rip in her jeans. "I talked to Lucas."

He waits, but it seems like that's all he's going to get. He starts to ask what Lucas said, but… he gets the feeling that it's not necessarily about what he said or not.

"But it's Lucas," Eddie says. "And you wanted to hear how someone else in a familiar situation felt."

Eddie gets that familiar, itchy feeling that he does when he wants to run, and he only barely resists the urge to bounce his leg up and down. It's not that he wants to run from Max, or even from this conversation, it's just - it's starting to make him think about things, and he really, really doesn't want an audience for this. He wants to lock himself in a room and pace, listen to some music, maybe scribble out his thoughts, something to get his hands moving and his brain in some kind of order -

"Even if Steve wanted both of us romantically," he says, knowing it's close enough that it's not a lie. "I would still rather be his soulmate than anyone else."

Max looks at him with narrowed eyes for a long moment. "I'm gonna ask Steve if you lied about that."

Eddie fixes her with an unimpressed look right back. "You think I'd do that to him?"

"You better not." There's an edge of menace in her tone, but she lets it go, so Eddie figures she doesn't really think he'd lie about something like that knowing it would be etched on Steve's skin forever.

Silence stretches between them, and Eddie follows her gaze out the window, watching Steve and Lucas playing basketball.

"I've put him through so much already," Max says, so quietly that he can barely hear it.

Fuck, Eddie is so fucking soft for these kids.

"You have not," Eddie says immediately. "You haven't done a goddamn thing, Red. Both of you have already been through so much, and it's not because of something either of you did. It's fucking Hawkins."

She doesn't look convinced, so Eddie pushes his shoulder against hers.

"Lucas is smart. He's more emotionally intelligent than I am-" Max snorts at him, and he's reasonably sure he hears her mutter something along the lines of like that's hard, but he ignores her. "He knows what he can take and what he can't. All you have to do is believe him when he tells you it."

She's quiet for a moment, looking contemplative. Then she asks, "Does that work for you?"

Right, yeah, okay, he deserved that one. He thinks about deflecting, but -

"I'm trying," he admits quietly. "What do you think, huh, you gonna let me beat you there or are we gonna do this together?"

Max glances out the window again, then turns to look back at him, her chin jutting out. "Steve loves too much, and he gets it thrown back at him too often. I don't think he really believes that we love him as much as he loves us, even though we do."

She says it like a threat, like she's saying if you tell him I said that I will kill you or maybe if you hurt him I will kill you. Either way, he'd be dead.

"I'll talk to Lucas and El, and you make sure you don't disappoint him."

Goddamn if that doesn't stab right to the heart of him, lodging itself beneath his ribcage and sticking right into the parts that'd already made him want to run from this conversation.

"Okay," he manages to get out, because he's not sure he'll survive any other answer.

Max nods. "Good talk," she tells him, and then she pushes herself up and she's gone.

Eddie stays there, mulling all of that over. He doesn't think she'd actually tell Steve anything they just talked about, nor does he think she really has any idea that Steve had asked him to make their bond romantic and he'd turned him down. Honestly, Eddie could probably get away with patting himself on the back for actually managing to give some decent advice and be the person she'd needed him to be for just a little while, then go on being a very devoted platonic soulmate for Steve.

Except even if Max doesn't really know, Eddie does. And now Eddie's thinking about things he doesn't want to, and wondering how much of a hypocrite some of the advice that he gave her makes him, and -

"Hey," Lucas says, and Eddie yelps.

Lucas raises his eyebrows at him.

"Jesus Christ, don't do that," Eddie bitches.

There's a little smirk, but fortunately, Lucas doesn't actually comment on it. "You talk to Max?" he asks instead.

"Yeah," Eddie replies, narrowing his eyes at him.

Lucas lights up, though, his whole face practically beaming with his smile. "Good. I figured it'd help her to hear that your soulmate cares about you no matter what from someone who wasn't me."

Eddie raises one eyebrow. "How do you know that's what I said?"

Lucas rolls his eyes. "Because you're Steve's soulmate. If that wasn't the way you felt, Robin would know, and she'd have already murdered you."

Eddie considers that. "Okay, fair."

Lucas makes his way over to the fridge, yanking it open and standing in front of it as he peers in. "So what did you tell her?"

Eddie sits back, waiting until Lucas turns to look back at him so he can shoot him a wide, smug grin. "If she wants you to know, she'll tell you."

He gets a glare in return, but Lucas doesn't protest that, just leans back in to grab a pair of Gatorades from the fridge. He twists the top off of one, taking a long swallow before he shuts the door and starts back out of the kitchen, giving him a little nod as he passes.

"Hey, Lucas?" Eddie calls before he can leave.

Lucas pauses, looking quizzically at him.

"I'm guessing you talk to Steve like Max does, about all this." Eddie makes an exaggerated gesture between them and out the kitchen window, meant to loop all of them in together. "But, uh. You know. If you ever want a different perspective, from someone in kind of your position."

He motions to himself, then splays his hands out all ta-da.

Lucas hesitates, lingering in the middle of the kitchen before he seems to make a decision.

"I was kind of upset about it when I first found out Max's other soulmate was El," he admits. "It was right after Billy died, and their soulmate bond was new, and Max kept letting El in while she was shutting me out. And I was angry, and jealous, and then when El had to leave and Max kept pushing me away, I just kept thinking that if El was here Max wouldn't be by herself so much, that the wrong soulmate got to stay in Hawkins."

Lucas pauses, twisting the Gatorades in his hand, but Eddie gets the feeling it's a gathering his thoughts pause more than a waiting for Eddie to say something pause.

"Eventually I realized that El could help Max in a way that I couldn't, and that maybe that was the point. I started calling El a little, too, when the phone wasn't busy, and just - El was grieving, too. I didn't want to feel jealous over something that helped them both anymore. It's been good with El back, really good. I don't know if I like El like that, but if Max does-" he shrugs. "I guess I kind of already got over the jealousy bit. It doesn't really matter to me if they kiss while they're having sleepovers or not, as long as they don't exclude me."

Now it seems like a waiting for Eddie to say something pause, so he gives a soft little hum. "What do you do if you end up feeling excluded?"

Lucas blinks, like he wasn't expecting that question. "Uh. Well, before, I talked to my parents and sometimes to Steve or Robin or Dustin. It's hard talking to Mike or Will about it because they're not all that objective about El stuff. I don't… really know if I want to tell my parents about Max and El like that yet, so I guess… talk to Steve or Robin or Dustin." He pauses, then, more tentatively, "Or you?"

Fuck, these kids keep getting to him. "Or me," he agrees easily. "But you should probably also add talk to Max and El to that list."

Lucas makes a face, but doesn't disagree. "I don't think a lot of the others know about Max," he says instead. "Just me and Steve and Robin, and now you."

There's an edge to his voice, like he's pretty sure Eddie must be safe if Max told him, but he's ready to fight him about it anyway.

"Max knows about me, now, so we're even," Eddie replies, pleased that the effort he puts into making sure his voice sounds steady pays off.

"Yeah?" Lucas asks. "Who else knows?"

"Steve and Robin. And now Max and you," Eddie replies.

Lucas lights up a little. "Cool."

"Cool," Eddie echoes, even though he feels a little shaky from the fact that he's now said it twice today, which is double the amount of times he's ever said it before at all.

There's a comfortable silence for a moment.

"It's complicated, being in our position," Eddie says after a bit. "I think it's always going to be complicated. But if we let it - I think it could be really great, too. Most people only end up in pairs, but us? We get a whole damn party of interconnected soulmates."

"A party of soulmates," Lucas says thoughtfully, then grins. "Yeah, I like that."

"You're a good kid, Lucas," Eddie tells him, not sure if he really needs to hear it, but he still remembers the way it made him feel when Uncle Wayne said it.

Lucas ducks his head, looking a little pleased, even though he follows it up with a sidelong look. "Even though I'm kind of a jock?"

Eddie shrugs. "My soulmate is a whole jock. I guess that means I've got a little jock in me, too."

Lucas's expression shifts, turning mischievous, and suddenly he looks like the fifteen year old boy he is, and not a world-weary adult. It's nice, it's wonderful, Eddie loves to see it, except it makes him realize what he just said far, far too late to do anything about it.

In his defense, they were having a serious discussion, and -

Yeah, he's got nothing.

Maybe it'll be fine? Lucas is probably the most mature out of all of the boys, maybe -

"I don't know, man," Lucas says, slowly, like he's actually considering that. "We've all heard the rumors about Steve. I don't think it's something little you're gonna be dealing with."

Eddie gapes at him.

"I said you were mature," he bemoans, flinging his upper body over the top of the kitchen table just to make Lucas laugh harder. "I told Max you were emotionally intelligent! Begone from my sight!"

Lucas takes his Gatorades and leaves, still laughing at him.

—

"Max cornered me in the kitchen to threaten me today," Eddie says.

Steve snorts. "Of course she did. What about?"

Eddie shrugs, waiting for Steve to look at him so he can waggle his eyebrows at him. "She also threatened to kill me if I told you."

Steve shoves him, and Eddie falls back dramatically, sprawling out on the couch. He props himself up on his elbows to look at Steve, but he doesn't seem inclined to actually push him to reveal what he and Max talked about. Instead, Steve goes about shutting down for the night, checking to make sure all the windows and the sliding glass door are locked.

"Soulmate stuff," Eddie says. Or more like blurts out, before he can change his mind, to force himself to have to keep going. "She told me what you said about the line between platonic and romantic soulmates. Made me think about some things."

"Yeah?" Steve asks, stopping by the couch to look at him.

"Do you still want me, Steve?" Eddie asks, his heart in his throat.

He isn't prepared for Steve to shut down, for the way his face goes cold and hard and blank.

"Not cool, Eddie," Steve says, turning away and going back to the windows in the living room.

Eddie pushes himself up off the couch, then immediately doubts himself and sits back down. "Steve, what?"

Steve won't look at him, and he can hear the window locks rattling with the force that Steve's using to check them. "You're being a dick, man, come on. You can't ask me stuff like that."

"I-" he starts, then stops, his mind scrambling a little. Is he too late? Did Steve move on already, even though he told Robin that he wasn't going to? Is Eddie so easy to get over that even his fucking soulmate couldn't keep him? "What happened to it's always going to be him, huh?"

"Jesus Christ," Steve says, incredulous, and Eddie kind of wants to cry a little because he knows that Steve has started saying that more because of all the time they've spent together. "You were listening to me and Robin? What the fuck, man, you still think it's fair to throw that at me?"

"Fuck you, Steve, I know it wasn't a lie when you said that. Am I so fucking easy to just stop wanting, or are you that fucking fickle?"

"Eddie, goddamn, is this - were you testing me? Is this you lashing out at me again? Because I can't, okay, not about this, I can't-" he cuts off, one hand scrubbing over his face. "I told you, I can't."

Oh.

Oh fuck.

"Steve, no, I wasn't teasing, I - it was a real question."

Steve stills, pausing right by a window. The light of the moon catches on him, highlighting parts of him in pale silver while the rest of him is warmed from the soft yellow of the living room lamp. "Seriously?"

"Come on, Steve. I just picked a fight with you instead of asking what you meant, and you're surprised I'm not sure you still want me anymore?"

Eddie can hear Steve breathing out, then in, then back out again, watches as he lets some of the tension bleed out of his body. "I think I picked some of that fight right back. I'm sorry, I just - all right, let's go back, and I'll listen without making assumptions, okay?"

Yeah, okay, Eddie can do that.

"Max told me what you said," Eddie starts again. "And it made me think about how smart you are." He wishes Steve were closer, so he could see his face better, at the same time as he wishes he couldn't see it at all. "How brave you are. How when you know what you want, you go for it, how you fight to keep it, how you own up when you make a mistake, how you work so hard to make all this work."

This is Eddie trying to be brave, he thinks. Trying to go for what he wants, to accept that they're going to have to work at this, that he's probably going to get hurt, that he has to trust that Steve will be willing to work past whatever it is that springs up.

It takes him a little too long, though, because after a few moments, Steve gently prompts, "Eddie?"

"Do you still want me?" he asks again. He didn't mean to, but it comes out anyway, all small and tentative.

"Eds," Steve breathes out. "I'm always going to want you."

He loves too much, and he gets it thrown back at him too often, Max had said, and Eddie swallows down the urge to ask him if he means it, if he'll still mean it the next time Eddie picks a fight, or every time he's an ass.

"I'm always going to want you, too," Eddie says.

Steve's hands twitch, and he looks like he's waiting for something - for a lie to show up on his skin, Eddie realizes, and Eddie knows he's going to have to do better than that.

"I want you," he says again. "Steve, I want you. I'll take you any way I can get you, but I just - this is stupid, I'm stupid. I'm making us both miserable because I was scared."

He's not surprised that's what gets Steve moving, and he comes over to sit by him on the couch.

"You're not stupid," Steve replies. "Not for being scared."

Eddie shakes his head. "No, but I am for giving into it. So I might get hurt, so what? I'm already hurting, wanting you so bad and not getting to have you, knowing you'd probably let me kiss you and not letting myself go for it."

Steve's looking at him, eyes all sharp and intense, like he's really listening to Eddie's every word, and hell if it doesn't make him feel just a little bit drunk on it.

"Talking with Max made me realize that I trust you. I trust you, with my life, with - fucking everything. I trust you to work through this with me, to figure out what works for us."

Steve runs a hand over his jaw, going up to pinch the bridge of his nose. "Yeah?" he asks after a moment. "You really - you want to do this?"

"So fucking much," Eddie says.

Steve's whole face lights up in a smile, and he leans in, one hand resting on Eddie's knee. "That mean I can kiss you now?"

Eddie barely manages to get out a please before Steve's other hand is sliding over his jaw, slipping back to push his fingers into his hair and cup the side of his face. Steve holds him there as he kisses him, and it's-

It's not Eddie's first kiss. But it's his first kiss that's ever really meant anything, and the soft brush of Steve's lips against his makes his heart stutter in his chest.

Steve gives a little hum, low in his throat, and then he's tilting his head to get a better angle, and holy shit.

Eddie pushes forward eagerly, deepening the kiss until they're both panting for breath, and even then they don't pull away. Their foreheads press together, lips parted and just barely touching as they share the same air. His eyes have closed at some point, but now he opens them to find Steve looking back at him, and Eddie smiles.

"How long do you think until Robin notices we haven't come up?" he asks.

"I'm okay with figuring that out," Steve replies, closing the tiny bit of distance between them to kiss him again.

I've got a pretty good handle on the outline for the rest of this now, so I'd say we've got about four more parts left!

-----

Part 24

Tag list (always happy to add more): @vampireinthesun @koibug @estrellami-1 @mentalcyborg @allbimyself26 @questionablequeeries @the-s-is-silent @whimsicalwitchm @a-gae-af-racoon @tinyplanet95 @n0-1-important @velocitytimes2 @swimmingbirdrunningrock @newtstabber @jcmadgirl @roblingoblin285 @lexyvey @paperbackribs @goodolefashionedloverboi @evix-syne666 @raisedbylibrarians @stxrcrossed186 @nightmareglitter @greekgeek24 @starman-jpg @crazyhatlady86 @imfinereallyy @manda-panda-monium @deleataecount @prideandsensibility @chaoticvictorianspirit @maydillydally @disrespectedgoatman @scarlet-malfoy @i-less-than-three-you @hbyrde36 @hallucinatedjosten @dragonsandgayships @arepaconchocolate @g4ys0n @novelnovella @bisexualdisastersworld @ghostofyourvampiregf @scarletyeager @pettrichore @nerd-and-nervous @hiimlevi @queenie-ofthe-void @cinnamon-mushroomabomination

#steddie #eddie munson #steve harrington #steddie fic #robin buckley #max mayfield #lucas sinclair #background lumax #hints of elmax and elumax #platonic soulmates stobin #steddie soulmate au

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astarionmademewriteit · 6 months

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My Fallen Angel (Part Two of Mission: Chaos)

Astarion (Unascended) x f!Reader/Tav

Rating: Explicit

MDNI 18+ Only. Blank bios will be blocked.

Wordcount: 3.7k

Tags: Smut; PIV sex; Fingering; Blood drinking; Painful puns; Maybe a little fluff.

Summary: After completing the mission, Astarion and Tav takes some much needed time to themselves.

‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵

Astarion and I flit through the streets, stopping every so often to press the other against a building wall–interlocking our lips as if we are addicted to each other's affections. In a way, we are.

The events that transpired earlier tonight ignited our passions–our unwillingness to keep our hands off one another is palpable. I would gladly watch Astarion level every building in Baldur's Gate if it brought him this much happiness–this much exultation.

By now, civilians have been pulled from the comforts of their homes, and drunk patrons have abandoned their cups so that they might get a better look at the commotion outside. The hungry conflagration where the stronghold once stood feeds on the rubble, debris, and the bodies of dead Absolutists. It is as if we had raised the very hells.

“Gale will have some choice words for us,” I giggle, trying to conjure images of our companions reacting to the building going up in flames.

“Let him,” Astarion chides, “What's done is done.”

We part through the swelling crowd, maneuvering around curious gazes and low murmurs. Every so often he and I would pickpocket the oblivious and cast each other knowing glances when we found something worthwhile. Just ahead, Elfsong Tavern buzzes with music and delight.

I turn to Astarion, “What about a celebratory drink? We can toast to the pile of corpses you made short work of.” I cock an eyebrow at him, excited at the prospect.

“Darling, the longer you keep me from camp and that delicious body of yours, the more you just delay the inevitable,” his amused expression tells me he is considering it regardless of how impatient he might be feeling.

“Come on, it will be fun,” I whine, grabbing his arm and pulling him towards the tavern.

He huffs playfully behind me, “Honestly dear, there are far finer establishments than this, but if you insist.” It is obvious he's just as excited as I, even if he would never admit it.

We enter the bustling tavern, patrons dancing merrily while others ponder over the explosion that rocked the city. I order a carafe of wine for the table and Astarion and I sink into a booth in the corner of the shoddy establishment. Astarion pulls me into his lap, and I welcome the closeness of our bodies as I pour us a drink.

“Honestly darling,” Astarion murmurs, “Do you expect me to drink this intolerable swill?” He turns his nose up at the cup, clearly above the substandard spirit. He pushes my long hair to the side, exposing my neck. He drags his nose along the column of my throat, “Especially, when I could be dining on the finest vintage in Baldur’s Gate,” he inhales my aroma, reveling in the way I smell, “I do have exclusive access to the greatest drink in Faerun,” he purrs.

I giggle girlishly, delighted in the way he craves me and only me, “All in due time, my love,” I whisper, leaning my back against his chest and allowing him to wrap his arms around my waist, “At least toast with me,” I turn my head and kiss him softly on the cheek.

“If you insist," Astarion leans forward and grabs the cup of wine and lifts it in the air, “To my little treat and the chaos she wreaks,” He pauses, carefully finding his next words–his expression turning serious, “After spending what felt like an eternity reliving an agonizing death over and over again, you came along and woke my beating heart–you taught me to live again. Thank you,” He bows his head in gratitude.

I drop my cup on the table, my heart warming at his words. I twist my body to press a kiss to his lips. My hand cups the side of his face with a tender touch.

After a moment, he pulls away, an amused grin on his face, “I don’t think you understand how toasts work, my dear. But admittedly, I like your way better.”

I smile softly before raising my own glass, “My love, you paint an aspiring portrait of our love. It is nothing short of a masterpiece,” I clink my glass to his, “To us.”

He nods in agreement and takes a sip of his wine against his better judgment. His nose scrunches up at the taste and he sticks his tongue out in disgust. I down my glass and giggle at his expression.

Before I could properly finish the carafe of wine, Astarion flung a few gold pieces on the table and scooped me up in his arms.

We are already headed towards the door, “Astarion! My wiiine,” I pout.

“How you managed to swallow that garbage is preposterous. You are too good for that place, my dear,” his arms tighten around me as we make our way out of the Lower City, “In any case, there's only one thing you'll be getting drunk on tonight,” he lightly spanks my ass eliciting a yelp from my mouth.

The camp is well within sight before Astarion decides to let me walk on my own two feet. The companions ran up to us, worry streaked across their faces.

“What in the bloody hells happened out there, we saw an explosion and and–" Karlach is on us in an instant crushing me into a tight hug, “I thought something horrible had happened.”

“To the cultists, maybe” Astarion says with an air of nonchalance.

Lae'zel fold her arms across her chest, “Leave it to these two to cause pandamonium.”

“We're fine Karla–wait… did you say pandamonium Lae'zel?” I snicker. She consistently fumbled her words and Astarion and I loved to give her hell for it–against our better judgment at times.

“What of it?” she asks, narrowing her eyes.

Astarion cuts in, trying to contain his laughter, “Oh Lae'zel don't think in such black and white terms.”

Lae'zel eyes us with disdain and I clasp a hand over my mouth trying not to laugh, “Astarion my love, do try to be less unbearable, will you?” I say through bouts of laughter.

Astarion and I double over laughing at our own stupid jokes.

“At least you make each other laugh, tch.” Lae'zel stalks away from us while we try to bring our giggles under control.

Gale is next to welcome us back to camp, although ‘welcome’ might be an overstatement.

“What happened to the plan? All I asked was that you remain imperceptible with minimal casualties. I sincerely hope that you had a good reason for demolishing an entire building! Now the cultists will be at our heels as we venture forth to find the elder brain.”

Astarion huffs, already drained from the conversation, “As it stands, nothing has changed then, has it?” he looks down at his nails, “except less cultists,” he gives a little shrug of his shoulder.

I quickly pull the enchanted note from my pocket, “Here, take this,” I thrust it in his direction, “the message is hidden under some kind of charm.”

Astarion perks up, “Yes, it looks positively time-consuming. You better get to it then,” he grabs Gale's shoulders and turns him around before shooing him away.

As I watch Gale walk away, fully engrossed in his new magical plaything Astarion leans over behind me and whispers, “Darling, I think you have made me wait long enough. Why don’t we take some time to ourselves, hm?”

I turn and playfully swat at his shoulder, “While everyone is awake, Astarion?! What do you think of me?”

He laughs breathily, “I think,” he reaches out and brushes his knuckles down my throat and across my collarbone, “You want it just as bad as I do. Am I wrong?”

I blush at his touch and at his words, suddenly feeling shy. “There's that color I love so much,” he whispers softly, cupping my rosy face in his hands.

I lean into his cool touch, overcome by his words. He pulls me harshly into his body and tilts his head to the side, crushing his lips to mine.

I snake my arms around his neck and jump into his arms, wrapping my legs around his waist. He is right, I want it bad.

He smiles under our kiss and carries me to his tent, leaving the chatter of the camp behind.

We fall in tandem onto his bedroll, his tongue desperately searching for mine. Our bodies grind together as our kiss intensifies and I moan under his embrace.

Astarion pulls away long enough to pull his shirt over his head. I remove mine quickly before we are at each other's mouths again. It is as if the momentary lapse away from one another was too agonizing.

Our hands roam aimlessly over each other's bodies. I tangle my hands into his hair and pull lightly and he offers a quiet growl in response–a growl that sends a shiver down my spine.

His hips roll into me, and his arousal is evident against mine. I gasp desperately, needing to feel him inside me. I pull on the waistband of my tactical trousers and peel them off with newfound urgency.

Astarion looks deeply into my eyes before removing his own and tossing them to the side. Instead of coming back to hover over me, he sits against the back wall of his tent and cocks an eyebrow in my direction.

“Come sit on my lap, baby girl,” he pats his thigh and I think I might faint at the new pet name. I eye him for a moment, watching the way his muscles move as his ribs expand and contract while he breathes. The moonlight casts a silvery haze around his ivory curls, and for a moment it looks like he dawns a glorious halo. My fallen angel. His vermillion eyes are unusually bright and clear as they rake over my exposed body–taking in my curves and the way my body reacts to him.

My pupils are completely blown out and my nipples stand erect. The slickness between my thighs only intensifies under his watchful gaze. My skin prickles with gooseflesh.

I crawl towards him and sit on his lap, laying my back against his hard chest. We breathe in unison, relishing the way our silken skin feels against one another.

He brings a hand to my jaw and tilts my head back to face him. He leans in and kisses me softly at first, his pace quickening as his free hand travels down my body. His lips are bruising against mine and he sucks my bottom lip into his mouth–his fangs grazing against me. He gropes at my chest, rolling my nipples between his thumb and index finger. I whimper under his touch. His arousal digging into my back–as if foreshadowing what's to come.

His hand continues to wander over my body, memorizing all of my curves and scars. He stops just before the apex of my thighs, and I yearn for him to touch me–to bring me unimaginable pleasure.

I whimper softly at the anticipation. “Darling,” he chuckles darkly, “Your body is practically begging for me, but I'd much rather hear it from your lips,” his voice is gravelly and thick with lust and my body quivers in response.

“A-Astarion, please,” I practically cry. My body was beginning to tremble, yearning for his touch–for him. My heart was pounding in my throat, something I’m sure that he had already noticed. His hand tapped impatiently just above my sex, and I know he is trying to coax more words from my lips.

“Oh dear, you make such sweet sounds,” he coos with a mixture of love and condescension, “But I need more,” as the last word leaves his lips, he tangles his fingers through my hair and pulls back harshly, and I reward him with a whimper.

“P-please, touch me Astarion,” I mewl. My body aches for his touch and I need him more than the air I breathe. I need to be engulfed by him.

“Since you asked very very nicely,” he murmurs softly. He quickly complies and dips his fingers expertly into my slick folds, “Such an eager little pup,” he coos, admiring the way my body reacts to him–how wet he makes me.

Astarion traces agonizingly slow circles around my clit, applying just enough pressure to ignite my senses. He tugs on my hair until my head rests against his shoulder and my back is arched to an ungodly degree.

As he continues his ministrations, the building pleasure in my core only grows as he drags his fangs against the soft flesh of my throat. I offer him a choked cry, wanting nothing more than to feel him drink from my neck. He inhales deeply, drinking in my scent.

“Feed on me,” I beg, my body longing to feel his fangs pierce my neck–to feel my life essence slip from my body as it nourishes him.

He offers me a low chuckle, clicking his teeth at me as if I were a petulant child, “Patience my love. I want to taste you at the height of your pleasure when your adrenaline is at its peak. I want to be inside you first,” he purrs. His fingers unexpectedly enter my dripping cunt, and I gasp loudly.

A cool hand clasps over my mouth, reminiscent of our entanglement earlier tonight. He knew I enjoyed it. “Sh sh sh. We wouldn’t want to disturb the whole camp now, would we?” I shake my head, unable to speak.

I’m panting heavily as he pushes deeper inside me, curling his fingers to perfectly hit my sweet spot. Pleasure radiates through my body, and I moan into his hand, unable to control the sounds he coaxes from my body. His pace quickens and I can feel myself nearing the edge of no return.

“That’s it, my sweet,” he purrs into my ear, his hot breath tickling the back of my neck overloading my senses and sending a wave of gooseflesh across my skin, “come for me.”

His words push me over the precipice, and I am falling, coming undone around his fingers, and dissolving into pure bliss. My silken walls tighten around his slender fingers as they coax me to climax. My body quivers, the white-hot flash of my orgasm rocking through my body as he whispers motivating words in my ear. I’m blinded by the pleasure he offers me and my heart pounds in my chest. My toes curl in response as wave after wave of ecstasy flows through my body. I whimper under his hand, and he growls in response, only intensifying my splintering pleasure.

“I can’t wait any longer,” he whispers gruffly, pulling his hands from my mouth and pussy. He grabs my waist–his fingers digging painfully into my soft flesh. He lifts me over his throbbing member, lining himself up with my dripping cunt. My body still spasms with the aftermath of my orgasm, and before I can completely fall back to Faerun he has thrust himself inside me, his cock stretching me out–testing my ability to fully take him inside of me.

“Gods below,” he growls, “You are so perfect,” his raspy voice is thick with praise.

I straddle his hips, my back still firmly pressed against his hardened chest. I barely manage to take him–inch by inch until I am flush against his hips. He is so deep inside me I feel like I might lose myself all over again.

He snaps his hips into me and guides my own to meet him thrust for thrust. I whimper, biting my lip to keep the screams from escaping as his cock brushes against my cervix. My mind swirls with unfiltered ecstasy, his movements lulling me into unfettered desire.

He fills me completely, and his jolting pace is both unrestrained and carnal. He slides himself out of me almost entirely, his throbbing head stretching me out further than I thought possible. The sweet burn of his girth inside me is alluring. The way my slick walls cling to him tightly elicits another growl from deep within his chest, and he hisses as he buries himself to the hilt once again.

My arousal rings loudly like a symphony throughout the tent, only motivating him to rut into me harder and with more force. I cry out, no longer caring if the other companions hear us inside. He was claiming my pussy–claiming me as his, and I gladly give myself over to him completely.

He firmly takes hold of my throat, applying just enough pressure to cut off the blood flow to my head, sending me into a delirious spiral that threatens to push me over the edge once again.

He continues to rut his hips into me, my ass rippling with each forceful thrust. Shockwaves of pleasure undulate through me. He tilts my head to the side, giving himself full access to my neck. He places sloppy kisses against the soft flesh of my shoulder and neck, warning me that he is about to take what is rightfully his.

“Feed on me,” I beg. I’m barely able to contain my anticipation.

“As you wish, darling,” he chuckles darkly. His acquiescence to my request further spurs the churning passion in my core.

He bears his fangs, as sharp as our daggers, and pierces the flesh where my neck and shoulder meet. The searing hot pain floods through my body until the pleasure is far greater than the pain. He drinks greedily from my neck, lapping up the blood as it flows freely from the twin puncture wounds.

His body begins to warm against mine and I continue to rock my hips against him–his cock spearing into me and hitting that delicious spot all too perfectly. As my life essence is pulled from my body, a dizzying sensation washes over me. I begin to pant heavily, feeling myself approach another tantalizing orgasm. Warmth washes over me threatening to burst me into flames.

Astarion whimpers desperately into my neck, tasting the adrenaline that tinges my blood. His movements are quick, my blood allowing him more energy than I thought possible. He quickly flips me over onto my stomach, never once breaking contact with my throat and never once pulling out of me.

He hooks his leg under my thigh and forces my legs to open wide for him. He thrusts into me with such force, his assault punishing and feral. I whimper under his weight, his cock thrusting deeper into me than I could have ever imagined. My vision begins to blur, and my breathing becomes ragged.

At the height of my delirium my body tenses as I near the precipice of another climax.

“Astarion, I-I’m gonna–” before I can finish my sentence he pounds into me harder, coaxing the orgasm out of me.

I fall once again over the edge, my vision darkening around the corner as I melt against his tense body. A strangled cry escapes my lips as he rails into me harder, my orgasm rocking through my body with such intensity that I fear it may stop my heart altogether. My brain practically short-circuits as I clench tightly around him.

His own breathing becomes ragged, his thrusts sloppier–and I know he is chasing his own release. He pulls away from my throat long enough for a deep growl to erupt from his chest, and then he is spilling himself into me. His eyes roll into the back of his head, giving himself over to his ecstasy.

Our collective climaxes scream in unison–pleasure combusting through our bodies with unprecedented intensity. My orgasm begins to fall away, and I can feel his cock twitching inside me as the last of his spent fills me completely. His body trembles against mine and moans fall from his lips, much to my satisfaction. He finally stills above me, trying to control his panting.

I reminisce on his earlier words, promising that I will only get drunk off one thing and I smile knowingly–I am without a doubt intoxicated by the primal pleasure he elicits from me.

Finally, Astarion kisses at the nape of my neck, “I’ve missed this you know,” he whispers before pulling himself away. I whine at the sudden emptiness, but I roll over to look into his ruby-red eyes. He grins auspiciously.

“C’mere,” he commands before pulling me into his chest. I gladly nuzzle into him, snaking my arm around his midsection and wrapping a leg around his thigh. He traces small shapes into my back, softly grazing my skin with his fingertips.

I smile sweetly into the crook of his shoulder, relishing his gentle touches. “I love you, Astarion” I whisper.

He gives me his signature grin and gazes deeply into my eyes. After a brief moment of contemplation, he looks at me, adoration overtaking his sharp features, “How selfish I am, to crave something that has no business being mine. Yet here I am now, a glutton for your love.” He leans over and places a soft kiss on my forehead.

I hum happily at his affection. “You deserve everything, my love,” I whisper, “I’m yours,” all the love and affection I feel touches my words.

“As I’m yours, darling,” he sighs longingly, squeezing me closer to his body.

There have been nights in his tent where only grief and pain existed. But then there are moments like this, where the world grows quiet lulling into a deep slumber and we find ourselves entangled–caught in each other’s web, unable to say goodbye or part with one another. Our feelings laid bare for the other to see. All the pain, the sleepless nights are only bearable when we are with each other. But tonight, we rejoice in one another.

We sit comfortably in each other’s embrace until sleep overtakes us. Our contentment in one another coaxes us into soft dreams of the future.

#astarion #bg3 #astarion fanfic #bg3 fanfic #astarion x f!reader #astarion x f!tav #astarion x female tav #astarion x tav #bg3 fanfiction #f!reader x astarion #tav x Astarion #Baldur's Gate 3 #fanfic #fanfiction #Baldur's gate fic #Astarion x reader #astarion ancunin #Astarion smut #bg3 smut

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atlaswav · 4 months

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ADDICTED TO THE RUSH ♢

INFO: 3k words, aiku oliver x fem! reader SYNOPSIS: strange things, a man did, when his knowledge of women was suddenly upturned by your very existence — the anomaly to his capricious heart, the addictive rush he'd been yearning for. WARNINGS: making out 16+ (shame.), hard drugs, hallucinogens, please don't do drugs kids, ESPECIALLY NOT FROM RANDOM STRANGERS LIKE OLIVER THIS BITCHASS, angst?? with happy ending. please be drug safe, not like this guy AUTHOR'S NOTE: not proof read and this is nothing except shame and delusion i'm ashamed and also simultaneously proud but i'll probably look back on this later and barf. listen to waiting for love by openside the title is inspired by that song. ++ if this is romanticising drugs in any way pls lmk idk what came over me. also likes and reblogs are really appreciated i'll give you a cookie 🫂

Contrary to what many would think, Oliver Aiku didn’t exactly consider himself one for parties. If anything, the thrumming bass that vibrated through the crowd, the alcohol stagnant in the air and the humidity of sweating bodies was an immediate line in the sand. He did have a reputation to keep, however, so what was one girl from the next when his name became a mantra on their lips?

Oliver wasn’t one for drinking, drugs or anything of the sort, either. Despite what his teammates may think, he would never have taken anything beyond a celebratory drink. Even though he’d been offered far worse on multiple occasions.

The professional soccer player couldn’t possibly risk any harm to his health, could he?

But he supposed, if he were to take the strangely glimmering, iridescent pill that was offered to him at the subway station in the dead of night, it’d be catastrophic. Strange things, a man did, when his heart was confused, brimming with reckless abandon.

What was another wound to his soul than what already was?

He’d ingest it against the voice of reason, and his head would start to spin after a few moments. Were there two of those men standing in front of him? The lights would begin to flicker in his vision, and the ground would rise up to meet his face unceremoniously, while he dreamed of a faraway paradise. A paradise filled with gaudy colours, rippling images, and infinite traces of you.

You, you you – your narcotic smell everywhere, your hypnotic laughter around each corner and bend, the hue of your irises flashing in the peripherals of his vision. He’d turn, aching to catch your evasive gaze, but you weren’t there.

Slipping through his fingers like water, fading into the effervescent shoreline. Trying to bottle sunlight – preserve seafoam.

He supposed that’s what loving you was like – would be like – not that he would know. It was an addiction in its own sense; chasing something that wasn’t there, yet yearned to hold.

He supposed that if he ingested that pill, and if all these things happened to him, then loving you was a drug.

He got unbelievably high from your presence, the rapid beating of his heart, your quiet smiles, shared furtive glances, secret whispers, your feather light touch skimming across his skin, your voice’s melodic cadences.

He’d give up anything to try again. To turn time on its head, watch the sand fall inversely through the hourglass and give rise to the words that were lodged in his throat. To stand his ground and not run away like the coward he became when it came to you. But of course, Oliver Aiku was not one for such things either.

And he hated himself for it.

The lights above shone a myriad of colours into his bleary gaze, the ground beneath him rumbling. What was that screeching noise?

It hurt his ears. He wanted to curl into a ball to escape it, but his limbs betrayed him.

His annoyance only spiked as people started to pour onto the platform, the ground shaking with footsteps and indistinct voices.

He told himself that he should move, but the iridescent lights above him were swirling into shapes, and he wanted to watch the bubbles float towards him, shining incandescently.

Wait. Bubbles?

“Oliver? Oh my god.”

He stirred, temples throbbing. Your voice started to haunt him too, it seemed. Lilting, soothing, lovely. He wished you’d speak again. He needed you to say his name again. It sounded like honey when it fell from your lips.

“Oh my god, Oliver, wake up.”

He mumbled something, faintly aware of a face in front of him. Your face. Beautiful, but marked with worry. He willed himself to reach out, to hold your cheek, to brush your hair away from your face, but he couldn’t.

“He’s off. On a trip to another universe. What did that guy give him?” another voice, this one less lovely. A dissonant cadence that had him remembering training. He hated training. Only because his team mates wouldn’t stop pestering him about you, once they’d finally found out about you.

“Hang in there, Oliver. We’ll get you home.”

Home? To him, home was wherever you were. He was entirely content to fall asleep in your arms, on the grimy platform floor.

Arms tried to lift him, but the six foot man was liquid in their arms.

“C’mon, can you move?” his teammate asked. “What did that guy even give you?”

He grumbled something. Tried to get his legs to move. Stumbled backwards, hitting his back on a wall.

“He said “a ticket to heaven for a night”, whatever that means.” You supply.

“That’s not reassuring.”

“Sendo, let’s just carry him. It isn’t too far anyway.” you huffed, looping one of his arms around you. He tried to cling to you with both arms, but his limbs flailed uselessly by his sides.

“Alright, fine. You’re buying me a drink after this, Aiku.” His teammate’s voice irked him, even in this state of bliss.

The walk back to his apartment took far longer than it should’ve. It was quiet, occasionally broken by the heaving of breaths, clouding in the winter air. Wisps of colour followed them out of the subway station. Was that a whale swimming towards them? No, that was just the light. The stupid, colourful light.

He creaked open his eyes, and the world started to swirl in his vision. Were they standing at his elevator? Is that why the wind had stopped blowing into his face? He leaned into your warmth, cheeks red from the cold.

“You can go now, I got him from here.”

“You sure?” His balance slips as Sendo removes himself from Oliver’s grip.

“Yeah. ‘Night, Sendo.”

“Yeah, yeah, message me if something happens. Goodnight.”

You stand there in silence with him, waiting for the elevator to arrive. His face presses into the crook of your neck, stubble grazing your skin as he mumbles something.

“Oliver, what did you do?” you sigh.

He frowns.

“You okay?”

He huffs.

“Silent treatment, or high out of your mind?”

He doesn’t respond. Spots start to appear all over the place. Spinning, spinning, spinning. Waves of dizziness wash over him, and his grip on your arm tightens.

“Come on, let’s get you to bed.” you haul him into the elevator, leaning against the wall as the ascent starts. Oliver wobbles dangerously, threatening to collapse as his knees start to give out.

“Why did you do this?” you mutter. “Is it because of what I said?”

His eyes snap open. As close to snapping open as his traitorous body would allow in this state of his. Your eyes meet his, and he feels himself wanting to drown in your gaze forever. His mind was just as traitorous as his body.

No, he wants to say. It could never be your fault.

But he doesn’t. His tongue is lead in his mouth, so he just looks at you in a stupor before you sigh and shake your head.

“You don’t have to reciprocate anything. We can still be friends.”

Your confession only hours before had felt like a weight finally lifted from your chest, quickly replaced by another. Heavier, more suffocating. When he’d run from you, it took everything within you to not run after him and beg.

He hated anything remotely permanent, he’d once confided to you. He found an appreciation for the fleeting moments of affection of one night stands and miscellaneous, faceless, nameless women – no strings attached, tying him down. Heaven forbid you become the object of his hatred, along with the object of his – disgust? You couldn’t tell, with Oliver. There was never any telling what he’d do.

You drew the keys from his pocket, unlocking his front door as he stumbled forward, nearly face planting on the floors.

“Come on, you big baby.”

“...Stars.”

“What?”

“Stars on the… ceiling.” me mumbled, eyes half closed.

Worry rushed through you as you seated him on the couch. Just how strong was the drug he took?

“What did you take?” you grasp his shoulders, shaking him lightly. He mumbles something close to ‘Don’t worry’. If anything, you begin to worry more as his head falls to one side.

“Oliver.” Your voice is a song in his ears, drawing up images of the waves at sunrise, bleeding orange, pink and purple into the deep blue of the water.

“Oliver, stay with me.”

“‘M fine.” he manages. “Dizzy.”

“Let me get you some water.” your presence – the warmth of your touch – disappears, and his eyes open in alarm.

He hears the sound of water being poured, then soft footsteps shuffling around. His apartment is dark, the only light drifting in from the balcony, illuminating the room with a pale glow.

“Here, drink.” you lift the glass to his lips, and he begrudgingly takes a couple of sips. Some water spills from the corner of his lips, down his neck. His Adam's apple bobs. His trembling hand comes up weakly to lower the glass, but he doesn’t release his grip as he meets your eyes. Pupils blown out, hardly on this plane of existence.

“I love you.”

You nearly drop the glass.

“You’re high. Say that to me when you’re sober.” you pry free from his grip, setting the glass onto the low coffee table in front of you. “Want to go to bed?”

He shakes his head, the movement apparently as much as he can muster. “Here.”

“Huh?”

“Here. With you.” he mumbles.

“What?”

Then you take a seat next to him, and his head falls onto your shoulder. His body seems to relax in your presence, wholly at peace.

You sigh. If “heaven for one night” meant anything, he’d be fine by morning, but you debated calling an ambulance anyway. Should you call the ambulance? Was that crook at the subway trustworthy? You glance at the peacefully sleeping man beside you, chest evenly rising and falling. He seemed fine, but he had taken drugs from a stranger.

You reach for your phone just as he grumbles, flopping his entire upper body onto your lap.

Okay, no, then.

Oliver’s soft snoring is almost endearing as he nuzzles his face into your thighs. You heave a sigh, running a hand through his neon green edged hair. He seemed to lean into the touch. No, it was your imagination. You lean back against the leather sofa and close your eyes, hoping for the night to pass sooner. Hoping that he’d sober up by morning, and spare you a trip to the emergency room.

Hoping to hear those three words in the lustre of clarity.

—

His dreams were filled with phantoms; phantom hands, faces, touches. Phantom words spoken into the air, disappearing in smoke, and only spurring his guilt. Yet as he woke from his stupor, the world smelled like you. Coaxing him back to the dreamscape. Exhaustion hit him like a tsunami, meeting him with a thundering headache.

His vision didn’t fare any better as he opened his eyes, the world a mess of swirls and blurring patterns. He groaned and flipped over, only to realise where he was.

The disorientation of sleep melted away as he finally came to his senses. Sweat, thinly beaded across his skin, his clothes clinging to his body. He lay curled up on the couch, head nuzzled into the pillows – warm, soft –

“Oliver? You awake?”

He snaps to attention, sitting up the moment he hears your voice.

The plight of his dreams, the palliative cadences that he wished he could despair in.

His head throbbed from the blood rushing to his head, and he swore quietly, swaying as he adjusted.

“How are you feeling? Are you alright?” your eyes are wide with concern, and something in his heart tugs.

The night before is an empty slot in his reel of memory, a smudge of bright, neon lights and dancing shapes as he attempts to recall exactly what happened. How he ended up sleeping on your lap, how you’d ended up at his apartment. Did you sleep over? It looks like you didn’t sleep at all, with the dark circles under your red rimmed eyes.

You abruptly get off the couch, heading into his kitchen. He hears the pouring of water, then you return, gingerly handing him the glass. He takes it, confusion slowly turning to realisation as he remembers.

And the memory of his cowardliness, his recklessness, his awful string of decisions that led him to seeing stars rushes through him like ice cold water.

“You okay?” you ask, voice soft. Treading on eggshells.

He nods, downing the glass of water.

Quiet, strung on a humming wire, envelops you as he attempts to find the words that kept escaping him. The words that he swore he’d never speak, even though you were right in front of him, still worried. Despite it all. You’d stayed, despite everything.

Would he have been a coward for pushing you away? Sparing you from the inevitable heartbreak that he’d dole out like his meaningless plethora of apologies, incapable of anything prolonged more than one night?

“Oliver,” his gaze snaps to you. His name was like ambrosia on your lips. He wanted to hear it spoken again and again, a prayer, a worship, a plea.

“Did we…” he trails off, sheepish. Oliver Aiku, bashful of his escapades.

Your cheeks redden slightly as you shake your head, unwilling to meet his eyes.

Silence, the capricious thing. Teetering on the edge of ruin, speared into disrepair with words that could shatter or mend your heart. Your heart, aching to be given away. Aching for the one that you couldn’t have.

Your name echoes through his empty house. The early morning sunlight peers through the windows, casting warm light on your face. Rejuvenating, almost divine.

“I’m sorry.”

Your heart drops.

“I don’t know how to–” he rubs his face with his hand, heterochromic eyes gazing at some point beyond. “I’ve never had a way with words.”

“You don’t have to say anything.” your bitter smile breaks his heart. Digs the blade in and twists, spilling burning acid into his veins.

He can feel his world crumbling around him as you stand, turning around. Heading for the door, for the threshold beyond that would mean you were finally gone. Finally out of his life, finally gone from the dreams that you haunted, from the touch that he craved.

He should be glad, but instead, like an addicted man, he reaches out, grabbing your arm.

“Wait,”

You turn to face him. Hope glimmers in your eyes and he can only feel guilty. His love wasn’t something that he could offer, his heart wasn’t one that could stay with yours for as long as he would wish, and it was another thing that he despised himself for.

He despised himself for not being able to love you the way you should be.

If only he could put it into words.

“You don’t need to comfort me.”

He sighs. “I’m not trying to comfort you, I just…”

You frown, stepping closer. “Then what, Oliver?”

If only you knew the effect you had. “I don’t have a way with words,” he starts. “But I’ve always believed that actions can speak louder.”

“What are you–”

Your words drown in his mouth as he pulls your mouth down to meet his. He drowns your gasp of shock, offers reassurance with the measured brush of his tongue on your lips. If Oliver had anything to show from his reputation as a womaniser, it was knowing how to treat a woman.

The kiss burns with a fervour that you can only describe as hunger. He kisses like he’s been starved, addicted to your taste, your touch, shivering as your hands wander into his hair. His breath catches in his throat as your nails scrape his scalp, muffling a groan as you bite his lip.

You pull away all too quickly for his liking. His starvation is in his eyes. Your breaths are quick, ragged, and he tries to kiss you again, but you press your index finger to his lips.

“Are you still high?” you ask, voice carrying that hint of joy that he wanted to illuminate.

“No.”

“Are you lying to me?”

A smile breaks out on your face as he sighs heavily, catching your wrist in his hand. “I might be, but I can think straight.”

A laugh from you, and he thinks he’s doomed. Fated to be wrapped around your finger for the remainder of his sorry life, a jester for your amusement. How quickly the tables have turned on him.

“We’ll see, Aiku.” you press a kiss to his forehead, smile luminescent in the dawn sun. Despite the sleepless night, watching over him in his state of oblivion, you were radiant. The object of his secret desires, the hubris to his mercurial heart.

“Wait, what?” As you turn to leave, he scrambles up from the couch, but his limbs won’t let him catch you. “Where are you going?”

“Home.” you cast him a coy smile. “If your actions speak true, come find me when you’re sober.”

Then the door opens and closes, before he can retort. Gone with the wind, scattered like seafoam on the shores of golden sand.

He falls back onto the couch with a huff, the ceiling still swimming slightly in his vision. Never again, he’d take any drug from any sketchy man in a subway station. He didn’t need drugs, alcohol or women anymore, he could discard his reputation completely. He didn’t need such things anymore – not when he had you.

You, you you, with your haunting presence, eluding his grasp like sunlight in a jar. He’d normally relent, turning to the next woman fawning over him, sweep her off her feet with his aloofness and casanova grin.

But now he had you, and the chase was a thrill that no drug could replicate.

You were his dopamine, he was hopelessly addicted.

written by @atlaswav, published 4th of February, 2024

120 notes · View notes

yoongsgguktae · 1 year

Text

paddle with me 02 | jjk

summary; jeongguk needs time to navigate his feelings. he’s strongly attracted to you—that he knows—but the torment you’ve put him through for years is hard to get over. pairing; jeongguk x reader genre; campcounselor!au | e2l | rivals | smut rating; M (18+) word count; 13.7k+ warnings; mentions of alcohol, cussing, outdoor intercourse, unprotected sex, oral sex betas; thank you thank you to @breadoffoxy and a friend of mine for reading through my first and second drafts. and thank you to @cutechim and @hobeemin for reading my outline so so long ago! i cherish you all 💜 a/n; IT’S BEEN 2 WHOLE YEARS, but it is finally here. Thank you for being patient with me, and thank you in advance for reading. I would recommend reading part 1 of paddle with me as a refresher since it’s been so long lmao.

PART ONE MASTERLIST READ ON AO3

—

Jeongguk scarcely notices the images on the canvas, everything is a blur, and the movie is reduced to a low hum in the background. His sights are trained on the poorly hung piece of fabric, but he is too distracted to focus on the scenes unfolding before him. The large linen sheet he is blankly staring at sags against the exterior of the dining hall. Its corners are loose, causing wrinkles to litter the images that dance across its surface, but no one seems to care enough as the camp counselors are all entranced by the movie before them.

They are seated outside watching a film under the clear night sky, another team bonding activity Namjoon likes so much. Yoongi had set up a projector and a surround sound system he brought from home while Hoseok and Jin hung the makeshift screen earlier that evening. The celebratory movie night is well underway with popcorn, alcoholic drinks, and small bursts of laughter.

Jeongguk shifts in his seat, and the bean bag slumps with his change in weight as he moves. He has been harboring a growing boner that has become increasingly uncomfortable under the constraints of his pants. His hand unconsciously passes over his bulge as his imagination runs wild with thoughts of your legs around his waist. He is captivated by the memory of your flowy skirt riding up your thighs as you moved in front of him all day while running the seminars since morning.

He barely focused on the standard discussions about staff policies, camp schedules, and safety protocols. For one, he has attended them for the past few years, and Namjoon insists everyone must attend every year regardless, but he was also aggravated once he learned that you were leading the seminars, the ones he used to do.

He remembered his lips lifted in displeasure as he lowered his gaze to the ground when you stood up to lead the discussions. Jeongguk was close to taking off to get some air, yet after catching your remorseful gaze a few times during your presentation, he realized you were not the problem—it was him. You had apologized, and there was no reason for him to be upset with you when it was not your fault anyway. You were asked to run them this year.

Jeongguk broke from his irritated stupor when you stopped mid-sentence during the discussion to bend forward and pick up your dropped pen. His eyes immediately traveled down your shirt, staring at the exposed tops of your breasts and sucking in his bottom lip as you stood straight. His tiny bit of annoyance faded as quickly as his dick started to harden. His attention had strayed entirely from the seminar discussions before him to lusting for you again.

The movie continues to play on the improvised screen before him, yet Jeongguk is far away. He is lost in his memory of you from earlier today, one that is about you in that skirt you have been wearing. His mouth hangs open, his jaw slack, and his palm unknowingly caresses his erection while zoned out.

Jeongguk comes to, mouth closing shut as he gulps. He adjusts his posture, sitting up a bit straighter while turning his gaze to the right, towards where you are sitting, with a large blanket across your legs. His eyes move up your figure to see the faint outline of a bruised mark on your neck. One edge of his lips turn up as his gaze sets heavy on the hickey, memories of him giving it to you. The sight alone gets him excited.

You are momentarily distracted from the film when you see movement in your periphery. The slight shift catches your attention since everyone has remained motionless, entranced with the film. You do not have to think twice, already knowing who it is. Feeling a set of eyes boring into the side of your face, almost palpable with how unrelenting his stare is.

Eyes never stray from the screen; you focus on the action in front of you. Your attempt to ignore him succeeds when you sense him shift his gaze back to the film. A brief moment of relief washes over you before you suddenly feel it again.

Is there something on your face? Why is he staring so hard? This time you cannot hold back your curiosity. You peer over at him in confusion, meeting his eager gaze immediately.

He raises his eyebrows, lips parting to swipe his tongue across them sensually. Your gaze slips downward to catch the slow movement, feeling a rush of warmth flood your cheeks. You feel weak at that small gesture, your body fully aware of his intentions. Your eyes close momentarily to regroup your senses before you level your gaze back with his. Eyebrows knitted, you mouth a ‘what’.

His smirk grows, the mischievous glint in his eyes more apparent. Jeongguk motions his head with a short nod and his eyes move in the direction of the small shed behind the group. A shed that lays untouched for most of the season until the grass needs to be mowed or when tools are sought out. It sits concealed by some overgrown bushes across the lawn, out of the way, and tucked in the corner of the main campground. A place very few people venture off to.

Your eyes widen when Jeongguk shifts in his seat, doing his best to rise without a sound. The bean bag slides underneath him, and he stands with caution. Not a single person becomes aware of his movements. You two are the only ones playing this dangerous game.

He starts to make his way toward the shed, giving you a sultry wink as he walks past you. Your face flushes once again. He wants you to join him.

Your eyes dart forward to the back of the heads of those in front of you, all too immersed in the film to notice Jeongguk leaving. A slight hint of panic rises in your stomach. You are afraid someone will discover him sneaking off, that he will be caught in the act.

After a few moments, with no one noticing his departure, you slowly get up from your cushioned lawn chair. You do not know where the confidence boost came from, but you have already committed to following Jeongguk’s example. The light blanket in your lap is abandoned onto your seat before you approach his direction with soft footsteps, proceeding to walk across the open field.

A fallen branch snaps under the weight of your foot, halting your movement as you let out a curse under your breath. The untimely coincidence occurred when the movie went silent; such terrible timing on your part. Increased awareness of your surroundings has you still, unmoving, and even holding your breath in case anyone hears. Once the movie volume picks up again, you turn around slowly with your feet planted on the ground expecting to see someone looking your way. All eyes are still on the screen during one of the intense scenes of the movie. You release a small breath and quietly rush towards the shed, not wanting to chance getting caught.

Your shadow bounces off the side of the shed. The movie illuminates a frantic and hurried outline of your movements as you swiftly head toward it. You turn the corner of the structure and make your way to the entrance. The rough texture of the rusty old door handle is hard against your palm. You pull it open while praying the hinges do not creak. With one step inside, your tongue can taste the dust in the air. It is dark and musty, clearly untouched for some time. Your vision starts to adjust to the darkness of the space.

You turn back to face the door, pulling it shut towards you. The hardware latches with a click just as an arm wraps around your front. A small yelp escapes you in shock when a hand snakes under your shirt while the other slams against the door right past your head. “You know, makeup doesn’t do much to cover that hickey of yours.” The words are close to your ears, almost like a shared whisper between two lovers, but the press of his body is aggressive.

Jeongguk has you cornered, his chest pressing his full weight on your back while he pins you against the door. His thumb starts drawing circles on your skin, sending chills up your body, his fingers slightly cold to the touch. In contrast, his warm breath crawls against your collarbone while he noses up your neck.

You lick your own lips, reminiscing how you received it in the first place. “It’s been four days and this thing hasn’t gone away.” The feel of his smile is warm as he drags his mouth over your skin. You continue, “It doesn’t help that you keep attacking the same spot either.” The hot breath of his chuckle makes you flush in excitement. It is almost like a threat, like he wants nothing more than to put you through this agony. He is having fun with this torture he is inflicting on you.

With one hand still roaming your stomach, he brings his other to his lips. His tongue spreads his saliva across his finger as he licks his thumb. Grabbing your nape with care, Jeongguk starts to rub the black and blue area you poorly tried to hide with concealer. This process is repeated before he brings you flush against his front and his mouth connects with the sensitive area once again.

A wince of pain pushes past your lips; he is relentless with his sucking. “I quite like it on you. It looks good,” he states before returning to the same spot after you crane your neck to give him more access, your body inevitably responding to his touch.

The attention to your neck has you light-headed, vision blurry as your eyes flutter shut, and the sensation runs down your body. Your head—clear of any and all thoughts—is full of just him and the feeling of his weight against you. His movements feel urgent and brazen, as if he is trying to prove a point.

Then the faint memory of this morning gnaws at your subconscious momentarily. You had glanced his way the moment you stood up. His jaw was sealed tight, probably from gritting his teeth, and he had cut his gaze from you the moment you locked eyes.

“You know it wasn’t my idea to present at the seminars this morning,” you whisper, “I should have made Namjoon give you the role of presenter since I know you’ve always done them.”

His palms graze along your body, slipping under your skirt, and Jeongguk hears your breath hitch as he reaches the curve of your ass. He gives it a squeeze, a warning to stop talking about it. His lips stop trailing down your neck, “It’s fine.” He focuses on your bare shoulder, lips grazing your tender skin.

“I could tell you were upset.”

Jeongguk huffs and his hold on you tightens, “I was not.”

He does not want to concede to your ridiculous accusations.

“Yes, you were,” you insist.

You push back against his body, and the attempt to get him to loosen his hold on you is futile. He effortlessly has the advantage with his large stature. Then again, the moment he feels your ass graze the bulge he has been carrying, he involuntarily relaxes his hold, letting out a hiss at the contact. Fuck, it is the simple things that set him off with you.

Jeongguk’s large hands spin you around, and your back connects with the door. His head lowers to your height, eyes boring into your gaze, and you cannot help but hold your breath.

“I said it’s fine. Drop it,” he spits through his teeth.

His hot breath fans across your face, and you can feel the annoyance radiating off his body in waves. He is being stubborn again, bottling up the emotions that hinder him from being honest with you. You roll your eyes with a heavy sigh. “You know, you should stop being so uptight and just accept my apology. I’m trying to say sorry.”

“Uptight?” His deep chuckle has the hairs on your arms stand on end. He rakes one hand through his hair and looks away momentarily. The sharp angle of his jaw is more pronounced while he clenches his jaw.

You yelp as Jeongguk suddenly tugs you off the door by your hips, whirling you around to shove you against the adjacent wall. One hand comes up to grab the back of your neck, forcibly angling your head to meet his eyes. “I said to drop it because I don’t care.”

You observe him while he holds you in place. His breathing has gotten more ragged, and you know you are the cause of it because of your persisting attitude. You have always been good at pushing him till he breaks, and you are not stopping now. “You are a terrible liar,” you whisper.

His eyes close shut, lashes fanning his cheeks, and he exhales through his nose. “I swear to God,” he pierces you with a maddening glare, only getting closer. He continues with his lips right above yours, “open your mouth again and I’ll walk out of here. Boner and all.”

The man is trying to have his way with you, and all you are doing is babbling. You need him just as much as he needs you right now, and there is no way you are leaving here without having him first.

Your hands grapple with the front of his shirt and wrench him forward. His lips meet yours instantly, mouths slotting over one another’s in a fervent kiss. The grip along your nape loosens as he winds his digits in your hair, and the stroke of fingertips along your scalp has you sighing into his mouth.

Jeongguk nuzzles his knee between your legs, his thigh coming to sit in the middle of yours, and caresses your clothed cunt as he thrusts it against you. Your needy moan compels him to press even harder, urging more strained pants to fill the tiny expanse of the shed while your tongues continue to entangle.

The cramped space is layered with dust and old grass clippings; it was the closest yet furthest spot to sneak away to without being noticed. There are better places to hook up, but it beats the abandoned outhouse from yesterday. He was desperate to get you away when he laid eyes on your form this morning; the skirt you have on fits your curves just right. He could not wait until the movie ended to have you since he has been restless since the seminars hours ago. The shed will have to work for now.

You let out a shaky breath at the graze of his hand creeping underneath your skirt again. The tips of his fingers skim up your thighs, briefly brushing over your pussy, making you whine until he meets the top band of your underwear. His fingers slip past the material and tug it without effort, dropping it down your legs. Your underwear falls around your ankles, lying discarded on the ground as you step out of them.

He captures your bottom lip between his teeth, giving it a final bite before he breaks the kiss. Your skin feels hot to the touch as he sets his forehead upon your bare shoulder, taking a moment to get air back into his lungs.

With your underwear gone, his focus is back on your cunt. Two fingers dip inside, and he proceeds to coat them with your cream with shallow thrusts before he takes them out to glide them along your folds. “I love the feel of your slick cunt,” he murmurs against your shoulder. Jeongguk parts your lower lips, his middle finger slipping back and forth on your folds, reaching your clit and giving it the most attention.

Your choked hum exhales close to his ear. One arm embraces his neck, and the other holds onto his bicep for support. His smirk grows wide as he feels your body slumping back against the wall, your legs growing weak at the slightest touch on your feverish cunt. He loves to see you fall apart on his fingers.

The heavy pants escalate the moment he dives into your warm center again. One, two, then three fingers pulsate against your wall. He thrusts and curls them at a leisurely pace while your breath hitches. In response, you claw his back, and he can feel your nails digging and dragging across the heat of his skin. Your markings are proof of the pleasure he gives you; he wears them like a badge of honor.

Jeongguk raises his head from your shoulder after placing one more kiss on your collarbone. He slips his fingers out, bringing them up to his lips. Your eyes flutter open when he opens his mouth to receive your taste. Lips sealing around his fingers, he sucks them clean while never looking away.

“So sweet,” he moans around his fingers. He will never stop craving your taste. “Here,” he says, moving to invade your cunt once more, “have a taste.” He plunges back into your warmth, thrusting a few more times before pulling them out.

The tips of his coated fingers lay waiting against your bottom lip. Your mouth opens instinctively to receive them, and Jeongguk’s cock jumps at your willingness to obey his command. He presses down on your tongue, and with lust-filled eyes, he watches you suck yourself off his fingers.

“You love the taste of your own pussy, isn’t that right?” he asks while thrusting in and out of your warm mouth.

You groan in response, eyes closing shut as you slightly gag around his fingers from the force of his thrust. Another jolt runs down his pulsating cock from watching you drool. Seeing the saliva run down your chin gets him hot and needy.

In one swift movement, he pulls away and kneels before you. His knees meet the dusty floor while his hands run down your body and to your thighs. He hikes one leg over his shoulder, letting the balm of your foot rest against the delve of his back as he spreads you in front of him. With a broad hand pushing your hip back against the wall, you steadily balance on one leg underneath his aiding grip.

Jeongguk presses his eager nose against your clit, giving it a small flick with a shake of his head. “You smell,” he inhales your scent with an obscene sound, “fucking amazing.”

A small whimper drips from your lips at the slightest touch. You grasp at the window frame, grip tight to balance yourself while your other hand weaves into his hair to coax him closer. His mouth moves over the expanse of your pussy. Tongue out and flat against your folds, moving slowly up down but never quite reaching your clit on the up stroke. The heat of his breath feels incredible on your skin, and you shudder when he nips your clit with his teeth.

The surprise yelp you release is cut short when his mouth encloses around it suddenly. The cruel way he sucks at the engorged bud places you in a euphoric state. It is impressive how he has learned to listen to your body, knowing all the ways you like to be handled only after a few times being together.

Your grip struggles to keep you steady as your nails scrape against the window sill, leaving marks along the old, weathered wood of the rarely-used tool shed. The wall against your back is stiff and uncomfortable as you slide down the rough surface, no longer able to hold up your weight due to the overwhelming pleasure Jeongguk’s mouth gives you.

“Oh fuck,” you let out.

The buckle in your knee intensifies as you feel the building pressure between your thighs. Even with his aid, standing is becoming too burdensome, and your legs tremble.

Jeongguk takes hold of your weakening leg, tossing it over his shoulder. With his large hands, he grabs both of your plump ass cheeks, hauling you up while he continues to devour your cunt sloppily. You yelp in shock at the sudden change in position. The majority of your weight is held up by his shoulders as your back pushes harder, digging deeper against the splintered wall.

You reach out to the nearby shelf crowded with rusted hand tools while your other continues to grasp the strands of his long dark hair. Your arduous attempt to keep steady is all for naught as his tongue persists. The sounds of his feast echo off the walls of the small shed, and you cannot help but gaze at the sight of him while he consumes your clit.

The small amount of moonlight that shines through the dusty window illuminates his glistening face. His lips, swollen with the labored effort, makes him appear divine between your legs.

Your head knocks back against the wall as your eyes flutter close in ecstasy. The volume of your moans increases with each suction of his hot mouth. Your hips start to move on their own accord, following his rhythm, and you tighten your grasp while you ride on his tongue.

The whines emitting from between your lips halt when Jeongguk abandons his endeavor. His head raises, and his eyes lift to your now open and questioning ones. “You need to be quiet,” he says.

“It’s not like they can hear me,” it takes everything in you not to call him out on his trepidation. For someone who thrives in taking risks—someone who fucked you in the outdoor showers just a few days ago—why is he acting cowardly? The faint noise of the surround sound system blaring the forgotten movie can be heard in the shed. He is being dramatic.

His hand runs up your leg and between your thighs, fingers reaching for your pussy. “Don’t talk back to me when I’m the one on my fucking knees for you,” his stern tone sends a shiver through you while he inserts a finger slowly inside.

You clamp your mouth shut the moment his thumb begins to draw circles on your clit, and you let yourself succumb to the pleasure once again. “Sorry,” you meekly respond before taking a deep breath through your nose. As you settle into his touch, the subtle smell of cut grass grounds you momentarily.

What started as a slow caress picks up pace, and Jeongguk eagerly inserts a second digit. His two middle fingers slip between your folds, his palm facing downward. The pressure of his curled fingers is unfamiliar in the position, yet the sensation has you reeling in a blissful state. Your lips part slightly, and your breath quickens.

All concentration on keeping quiet is gone when your clit is engulfed by the warmth of his mouth again. Caution is thrown out the window as he keeps up a maddening pace with his thrusts, sending you ever so close to the edge. His other hand clamps around the back of your thigh to keep you open.

With your chest heaving deeply, your body begins to unravel, every nerve erupting at once. Your orgasm overtakes you and you cum against his mouth.

Jeongguk moves his lips softly around the clit, to the labia, and around the seeping hole of your pussy. He is gentle with his licks and does his best to clean you up. He sets one leg down, then the other, and watches you slump back against the wall as he gives you time to regroup after the intense orgasm.

“You good?” he asks, rising from his kneeling position.

“Mmhmm, very good,” you sigh.

His bulge is more apparent now that he is standing. He attempts to adjust his hard-on before leaving the shed. Jeongguk steps back and reaches into his pants to fix his boxers.

Your hand reaches out to grab his wrist. “Can I?” you ask.

He stops short at his attempt. Pleasing you and watching you unfold because of him gets him off every time. He did not have any expectations from you, but even he needs his release after something as explosive as what he just witnessed.

“Yes, please,” he says.

He allows you to pull at the strings of his sweatpants, hurriedly untying them. Your fingers slip inside the waistband, circling around his waist to pull them down to rest at his thighs. You start to descend, dropping your knees to the ground before him; however, he grabs you by the elbow to coax you back up.

You glimpse up at him with eyebrows furrowed, mouth slightly open to question him, but he seizes your thighs and lifts you off the floor. Your breath catches in your throat while your arms wrap around his neck at the sudden change in position, and he feels your nails scrape against the skin of his back.

Your nails only deepen as he abruptly spears you with his cock. Your wet center readily takes him in without a struggle.

Both of you grunt in unison when your back hits the wall again. Legs wrapped around his waist, his arms holding you up by your thighs, he rams inside you. The swell of your breasts peeks out from the confines of your shirt, bouncing with every thrust of his hips.

Jeongguk tugs down at the low neck of your shirt, releasing them for his viewing pleasure. With your shirt under your breasts, they are lifted and spewed out. With eyes trained on your bust, the bounce of your supple tits fuels his thrusts.

The shed begins to creak as the force of his hips rocks you. Pulling you off the wall, your hands quickly grab ahold of his shoulder. He turns on his heels, trying his best to concentrate on holding you upright on his cock without slipping out of you. His feet swiftly kick away a hammer lying on the ground while trying to maintain balance as he holds you in mid-air.

“Hold the shelf behind you.”

You loosen your grip around his neck, arms blindly searching for the shelf. Once you grab hold, Jeongguk impales you deeper with no plans of slowing down. The sound of skin slapping and your collective grunts powers his search for release.

Your tits bounce with each forceful thrust. You look mesmerizing with your messy hair, mouth slightly hanging open, and eyes brimming with tears. His hips stutter at the sight of you coming undone on his cock.

“Look at me,” he says. With eyes hooded over, you meet his. “Whose pussy is this?”

“Yours,” you whisper in response.

"Say it louder," he demands.

"Yours!" you shout.

“Fuck,” Jeongguk grunts. His hold tenses around your thighs. “You look stunning… fucked out on my cock like this… absolutely beautiful,” he grunts between every jerk of his hip. He sputters through his own release, warming your center, filling you with everything he had.

He rides out his high with shallow thrusts of his cock, slowly descending from the pleasure. But even so, with his mind clouded with bliss, Jeongguk’s thoughts cannot help but stray to the nonverbal agreement you struck days before.

—

Jeongguk finds himself seated in front of the sweltering bonfire again. It had been several hours since the group returned from the canoe trip and gathered for another round of drinks like the night before. Everyone is a bit tipsy, a few drinks in, and the chatter has increased while the night sky has grown darker. It is only the second day, but it has become the usual nightly routine while campers have yet to arrive.

A freshly opened can in his grasp while he recalls earlier events from the day. It is his third one of the night, and the light buzz in his head tells him he still has a ways to go until he is drunk. The goal is to forget what happened today at the river, at least for tonight—to drown his feelings.

He had witnessed you turn and walk to your bunk while he was trying to get Hoseok off his case. He did not hear from you again until dinner later that night. You sat at the opposite end of the long dining table with wet hair and an oversized shirt, freshly out of the shower. You were ignoring him, keeping your distance, and going out of your way to avoid him. You must have been hiding until dinner was ready because he did not see you for hours.

You were obviously upset at his refusal to talk after returning to camp, but it was not so much a rejection as it was a knee-jerk response to your sudden question. Can you blame him? The hesitancy to trust you comes naturally to him after all you have done. Jeongguk has spent the past few years loathing you. How was he expected to throw away the emotional wound you have left on him all this time over a single hook-up?

Despite that, the somber expression that painted your features hit him like a ton of bricks, sincerity in your eyes that he had never seen before. But he was still struggling to come to terms with genuinely forgiving you. Yes, he told you back at the river that he forgave you, but the white lie slipped past his lips too quickly. Jeongguk was not entirely convinced that you were remorseful of your past actions—not yet.

He breaks from his thoughts at the sound of your laugh.

You are sitting across from him again, with Jimin’s arm across your shoulders this time. The rise in body temperature has nothing to do with the fire in front of him but everything to do with how you are snug against his frame. Jeongguk’s posture becomes rigid at how you two are so casual in front of the entire group.

The pair are laughing along with Jin’s retelling of an interaction with a camper’s parents last year. “She saved my ass! That mom was going to wring my neck because I let her son jump off the high dive,” he explains as another round of laughs erupts from the trio.

Jeongguk stretches the knot in his neck, irritated. He has been ignored all night, yet you easily socialize with everyone around him while continuing to act like he does not exist. One would think he would be used to it after all this time, that he would prefer it this way, but something has changed for him. It stings.

“She should honestly be the one to handle parent complaints. They all love her,” he continues to say about you.

He would usually be irked with Jin’s praise, but that is not the issue tonight. He observes how you lean closer into Jimin's body as you laugh, your hand slaps his thigh, and Jeongguk catches your gaze mid-chuckle. You waver, sitting motionless like you were caught in the act. He scoffs to himself before raising the forgotten can to his lips, the beer still cold on his tongue. What is going on with him?

The way he downs his beer has the hairs on the back of your neck stand straight. Suddenly Jimin’s arm around you feels heavy as Jeongguk holds your gaze over the rim of the can. He lowers it down in his lap again, using the back of his hand to wipe across his wet lips.

His clenched jaw is evidence of the anger you gather is raging within him. This is the moment he would typically stand to leave, to escape. You are waiting for him to get up and storm off, but he stays unmoving, his attention not straying away from you in the least. Your face flushes with warmth, and you avert your attention down to the can in your own hand, flicking the tab to keep yourself busy, focusing on the sound it makes as you drown out the people around you. The sound of their voices becomes muffled in the background.

You used to gush under all the praise, soak it in and flaunt it outwardly on purpose in front of Jeongguk. But things are different now. You no longer want to be in the spotlight after learning how much he despises you because of it. The desire to mock him ceased to exist the moment he carried you into the water after the most mind-blowing sex you have ever experienced.

The way he gently cleaned you, took care of the aftermath of your escapade, had your stomach churn with desire. A desire to be wanted by him beyond a physical way. His act of tenderness made you believe he wanted that too.

But you were left a fool. His rejection hit you hard, a big slap to the face you were not expecting, and took you by surprise. You were, and still are, confused at how Jeongguk has shown interest in you but then seemingly wrote you off when you arrived back at camp. As if it meant nothing.

It is embarrassing to think you gave yourself entirely to a man who expressed no interest in you as soon as reality hit him. You have concluded that he made a mistake, that he probably regrets everything because it seemed like he wanted nothing to do with you afterwards. It is humiliating how you thought he may have wanted more when his actions say otherwise.

Avoiding him since you got back has been your only escape from heartache. You cannot bear the thought of another rejection. The time between now and when you arrived from the canoe trip was spent hiding in your bunk, but then something shifted in you when you laid eyes on him during dinner. As you locked eyes with him, you became angry and irritated. How dare he use you like that and act as if nothing happened.

You sit here now in front of the fire, him just on the other side, and you want to scream and tell him off.

The group around you start to rise out of their seats, pushing you to take a deep breath to settle the rising anger. You did not notice how long you were stuck in your head and how much time had passed. People were yawning and collecting their empty cans; it was late.

“I’ll grab some water to put out the fire,” you say out loud while the others start to head to their bunks. Grabbing the water jug from behind your seat, you walk to the lake's edge. You squat, setting the jug in the still and cold water. The sound of frogs in the distance keeps you company as the liquid spills into the container. The water fills to the brim, so you tip the jug to dump some back into the lake. The sound of footsteps behind you is masked by the sound of the water dribbling into the body of water before you.

You stand startled as you feel a presence behind you, heart hammering in your chest and turn only to find Jeongguk stalking towards you with long strides. Glancing past his shoulder, you realize everyone has left, and it is just you and him. Well shit, there goes avoiding him.

His hands reach out, fingers brushing your grip around the handle. “Give it to me. I’ll put the fire out.”

“No. I can do it myself,” you spit, shaking your head and huffing from the exertion. The jug full of lake water takes a lot of effort to carry, the weight of it heavy under your drunken grasp. You swing it into your other hand, switching arms due to the burden. He reaches for it another time. “No, I got it.” You step to the side and continue walking toward the bonfire.

Jeongguk sighs and spins to your retreating figure. Needless to say, you are struggling with the heavy load, but you are being stubborn about it. He takes steps to reach you and extends his hand again. “Just give it to me,” he says as he grabs your hand. The jug slips from your hold as you yank it away from his reach the moment his skin touches yours. It meets the ground with a hard thud, the water pouring out of the container and into the soil.

He meets your irritated scowl. “Can you fuck off?” you bite in his direction. Your shoulders stay tense as you grab hold of the jug again, heading back towards the lake to refill it on his account. Jeongguk rolls his eyes and kicks at the sand beneath his feet. None of this would have happened if you could stop being so stubborn. He was merely trying to help.

He hangs his head while you walk past him, taking a deep breath before turning in your direction to catch up with you. With his hands in his pockets, he strolls by your side as you return to the fire again. “Why are you being like this?” he questions.

You scoff in return, your steps not faltering in the least as you continue to walk with him beside you. “Why am I being like this?” You return his question with one laced with sarcasm, and he has to hold himself from rolling his eyes again, a quick-witted response on the tip of his tongue before you continue. “Honestly, I’m a little upset that you completely blew me off earlier.” You move the jug to the other hand.

He glances at your side profile, baffled by your accusation as if he did not hear you correctly the first time. “Blow you off?” he stammers. His hands come out of his pockets, raised in the air. “How could you expect me to have an answer so quickly after what happened?”

You two reach the bonfire, the flames' gleaming light across your skin as he meets your glare. “I need time to sort it out in my head first. I don’t know what else you want me to say,” he reasons. He has never felt so conflicted before, and now you think he hates you.

“Well, I don’t know. You responded pretty quickly to my kiss and fucked me without any hesitation.” His face reddens at the statement, involuntary jerking in response to your words. “Didn’t think it would be hard to get an answer from you,” you continue.

Before Jeongguk can respond, he follows the rise of your arm as you lift the container above the flames, tipping it over and allowing all the water to spill over the raging fire. The sizzle of the wood increases as the fire goes out before only minor strains of the dying fire are heard. A cloud of smoke surrounds you two briefly, but your eyes never drift from his.

“You and I both know that wasn’t planned,” he says, looking away while the smoke settles. He clears his throat, aware that you continue shooting daggers in his direction. “We were both caught up in the moment.”

The container falls from your grip, the loud impact startling Jeongguk and making him face you again. You stand straight with clenched fists and ask, “So you’re saying you made a mistake and weren’t thinking straight?”

His eyes go wide momentarily. “No. That’s not what I’m saying at all.” Shit. “I’m saying that I need time to sort out my conflicting feelings.” He winces immediately as the words come out of his mouth. Your eyebrows pinch together and the corner of your lips turn down, the pain across your face evident.

Before he can apologize for his poor choice of words, you cut in. “Conflicting?” you look off to the side, hands coming up to fold in front of your chest. “Whatever. Go ahead and take your time to figure out your conflicting feelings. Then get back to me.” Refusing to hear yet another excuse from him, you sidestep him again and make your way to your cabin, accidentally kicking the empty jug in the process.

His choice of words hurt you, and he should not have said it that way. It made it seem like he was not interested in you, but you were making assumptions about him that were incorrect and unfair. Jeongguk steps around the container, nearly tripping over it as he follows behind you again in a rush. “Are you really going to act like a child until then?”

You turn your body to face him, your feet continuing to move backward in the direction of your bunk. “You know what, Jeongguk,” with your hands raised, “yes, I will. I will act like a child until you figure your shit out.” You spin on your heels and climb the porch of the cabin.

He scurries to catch up, taking the steps two at a time. His hand grasps your arm before you can open the cabin screen door, tugging you softly and turning you around. “What do you want from me?” he huffs, hand running through his hair roughly. Despite his curt tone, his eyes are soft, and the wrinkles around his brows pull together in worry.

“I would like for you to be honest with me, Jeongguk. Your actions tell me one thing, but you verbalize something else entirely.” You can hear the way your voice sounds defeated as you utter what has been bothering you since the canoe trip earlier that day. You have to force yourself not to pout, to put on a false bravado while maintaining eye contact with him.

He looks away, face taut and lips tight before replying, “Our relationship isn’t really conventional, is it? We’re not exactly friends. We’re the opposite, honestly.”

Another stab to the heart. Does this boy not know how deep his words cut you? “Then why did you kiss me back there if you hate me so much?” you sneer, the quiver in your voice apparent, unable to hold it in this time. You curse yourself for showing weakness, briefly shaking your head while gazing down at your feet. Damn him and your inability to keep your emotions in check.

“I’m attracted to you, ok?” He almost yells, his voice intensifying as the confession stumbles from his lips. The air hangs heavy around you two, and you witness him tugging at his brown locks in frustration. He breathes, lowering his voice to continue, “But I don't know how I feel beyond that. I'm still trying to figure out my emotions. It’s not every day that I have sex with someone just for the fun of it. I’m not that type of guy,” he explains.

“You're attracted to me?” you whisper. Your fingers reach for the edge of your shirt, grip tight around the fabric. You must have heard him wrong, tricked by an over-active, sleep-deprived, and twisted imagination. You should feel elated to hear such words from him, but it simply makes your stomach sink.

He furrows his brows. “Well yeah. I thought that much was obvious.”

For a fleeting moment, the panic you have been feeling returns to your chest, and you feel utterly bare, as if he could see right through your facade and that he would call you out on it. You scoff, “Yea, because you saw me naked. Why else would you be attracted to someone like me?”

The memory of your previous relationship comes forth, an ex-boyfriend who made you feel worthless and insecure. But before you can fall back into that dark place you fought hard to escape, Jeongguk steps closer, pulling your attention back to the present.

Your back meets the cabin door as you retreat from his approach. “Can you stop playing stupid?” he spews with hot cheeks and nose flaring. His blood is boiling at your foolish response.

He observes how you look down at your feet, struggling to maintain eye contact with him after what you said. Your vulnerability is strange to witness. In his eyes, you are the most fearless and assertive woman he knows, but to have you standing silent in front of him while making self-deprecating comments in jest has him stunned. This is not like you.

He can see it now, see the hurt he has caused you over how he handled what happened earlier that day. He brushed you off too quickly, and now you have conjured all these negative narratives about his behavior. Since you walked away after returning to camp, you have had the entire night to create this false sense of insecurity for which he is responsible.

He did this to you. He pushed you away.

Jeongguk spans the distance, reaching for your face. One palm cradles your cheek while the other grasps your nape, fingers gently threading through your hair. He angles your head to meet his gaze. His heart pumps erratically in his chest while you grab onto him. Your soft fingers curl around his wrist, and you lean into his touch. “Please. Please don’t talk about yourself like that.” His voice is soft in contrast to moments ago. The need to comfort you, to erase the doubt that runs across your features, is the strongest emotion he has felt towards you yet. This frightens him.

The warmth of his mouth finds yours without warning, making you gasp in surprise. Jeongguk’s hold of your face slides down to your hip, pulling you tight against him as you kiss him back with eyes fluttering shut. Since the canoe incident, he has yearned to taste you, a secret he would never admit to you—a secret he has not even admitted to himself until this very second.

Your desire does not go unnoticed by him as your hands reach for his shoulder to bring him closer, urging your body against his and erasing all distance. Your body's heat feels so blissful that his fingers curl deeper into your skin, making you moan against his mouth. That sound, your sweet and breathy moan, goes straight to his dick. He has never felt so hungry for someone the way he is infatuated with you.

He moves to explore deeper into your mouth, tongue darting out to flirt with yours while he presses you further into the door, his hard cock pressing into your body as he leans into you. Your hand wanders into his long hair as you respond desperately to his kiss with a whine, tugging softly. He deeply groans in approval at every swipe of your tongue on his.

He draws your bottom lip between his teeth before pulling away and meeting your forehead with his, stepping back to give you room. Both of your breaths are haggard, chests rising erratically as you two try to regain air in your lungs. Jeongguk opens his eyes to see yours slowly flutter open, lust swimming in the depths of your gaze.

The certainty that you want him just as bad is evident in the way a mix of sighs and whimpers involuntarily spill from your lips when Jeongguk moves to kiss the expanse of your neck, and you arch your head to expose more of your neck to him. His lips trail down to your collarbone to leave wet, open-mouth kisses. “Can I have you again?” he whispers into your skin as he continues to run his lips along your shoulder.

Your hands meet his firm chest, compelling him to step back. A sudden moment of panic washes through him as you push him away. Did he read your signals wrong? But you stun him when your hand grasps the front of his shirt and opens the cabin door behind you. Your pull on him almost knocks him off his feet before he finally follows your steps inside your private bunk.

—

You cannot help but feel your stomach drop while you fixate on how he hastily pulls his sweatpants over his hips. His large hand moves to tie them in place after laying around his ankles during your hook-up in the shed.

Hook-up.

You must remind yourself that this is all this is—this exchange of your bodies and pleasure is not laced with any emotions. At least, that is what you have to keep telling yourself. After another round of sex following the confrontation a few nights ago, you two have been discreetly meeting for sex almost daily. It was not an arrangement per se. It just happened. Nothing would have prepared you for this. For one—his stamina is incredible, and no one told you how hard it would be to have casual sex without it getting messy. You can see yourself falling but do not know how to stop it.

Jeongguk’s muscles strain as he reaches for his shirt on the floor. He pulls it over his head and pats away the collected dust. You are simultaneously putting your skirt back on and fixing your shirt to busy yourself. You feel self-conscious every time, never knowing what to say after all the dirty things he whispers in your ear as he spears you with his cock. These exchanges are becoming more frequent, yet you still have not figured out how to make it less awkward post-sex.

He finds your underwear hooked over the lawnmower's handle, grabs it, and shoves it in his back pocket before you have the chance to ask for it. You look at him in question. “I’m sorry, do you want to wear your panties that were on the dusty lawnmower?” he asks with a slight grin and one eyebrow raised.

A flush creeps across your cheeks. Returning to the movie without anything underneath your skirt while his load slides down your inner thigh makes your face feel impossibly hot. How his eyes twinkle with mischief makes you realize how much he enjoys this. “It’s fine. I can wear it.” You reach your hand out, waiting for him to hand them over.

He shakes his head, that smile never leaving his lips as he grabs your hand and pulls you to him. His head coming down next to yours and his mouth near your ear. “Raise your leg,” he commands, his hot breath fans your neck. You place your hands on either of his shoulders for balance as you do as you are told.

Jeongguk retrieves your underwear from his back pocket. He plucks away a piece of grass and holds them before you, encouraging you to step into them. You raise one leg, slip it through the opening, and then the other. You feel his hands brush your legs as he helps slide the thin fabric up your thighs, over your ass, then securing them around your hips.

His hand cups your cunt suddenly, long fingers fondle your engorged folds, and you immediately let out a whimper at the touch. “You’re dirty in more ways than one now,” he snickers before pulling back with an even bigger smirk. He turns and heads to the shed door, opening it wide so you can pass through first, but you are rooted in place.

You are thankful for the darkness as you feel your face flush.

“Come on. We got to be back before the movie ends,” he reasons, laughing at your shocked state.

Feet finally moving, you walk past him and through the opening. Jeongguk follows shortly after, shutting the door quietly behind him. With light steps, you two head back to the makeshift outdoor movie theater; everyone is still too engrossed in the film to notice your arrival. You sit back in the seat you had abandoned, picking up the blanket that had since fallen on the ground during your absence. Luckily, an intense fight scene is playing, masking the sound of your return.

Jeongguk takes his respective seat just as he catches Taehyung slightly turning his head to make eye contact with him. The corners of his lips rise, a knowing smirk plastered on his face as he raises his eyebrows suggestively. Jeongguk curses under his breath, the tip of his ears turning red in response. He focuses back on the screen before he glances to see if Taehyung is still looking at him.

He catches his gaze again. This time, Taehyung shakes his head with the same smirk and turns back to continue watching the film. He takes a deep breath, embarrassed for getting caught, yet he is thankful that it is Taehyung, of all people. Any other person would give him shit, probably stop the movie and make a scene.

The film ends, and the clean-up crew stays behind to take down and deconstruct the theater. Jeongguk observes you heading back towards the cabins with Yoongi and Seokjin in tow while he waits to help dismantle the screen. If he is honest with himself, he was hoping you would turn around to mouth goodnight or even a wave, but you continue with the guys and head into your bunk for the night.

A tap on his shoulder grabs his attention, and he turns to find Taehyung creeping close. “So, how long has that been going on?” he asks under his breath.

Jeongguk’s fingers tighten around the fabric, visibly wincing in embarrassment. Again, he finds himself in a predicament that he cannot escape. He glances around him, gauging to see if anyone else is listening or paying attention to them. They are all busy packing away the sound system or moving the chairs back into storage.

“It’s nothing serious. We uh,” he looks around and continues under his breath, “We’re sort of just hooking up.”

“Oh?” Taehyung says too loudly. “It’s about damn time.” His hand comes down to pat him on the back, congratulating him.

Jeongguk folds the sheet in his hands, smoothing it down and setting it on the table. He clears the doubt creeping up his throat. “Yea, but it’s not as simple as you think.”

He has been struggling to understand the way he feels about you. These emotions are repeatedly brought up following your hook-ups; after it is all said and done, he wants more. But that is just it—more of what?

“Hmm,” Taehyung looks beyond the cabins and into the woods, “Do you want to go to our spot and talk about it?”

The tension in his body releases at his words. What a relief it would be to talk to someone about how he has been feeling. Immediately he takes him up on his offer, nodding in response. Taehyung jerked his head toward the direction of a large boulder at the edge of the lake that had become their designated spot. Abandoning his task, Jeongguk follows behind his friend.

The boys take the small dirt path through the woods, a testimony to how frequently they have visited this site over the years. Taehyung walks ahead and reaches the boulder first, climbing up the side. Jeongguk mirrors his actions and sits perched at the top, facing the expanse of the lake with Taehyung right beside him. The camp is no longer in view, the light of every cabin dims between the trees, and they are secluded.

Jeongguk sighs, his hand coming up to ruffle the hairs on the back of his head while he sits crossed-legged. “I’m assuming you know what happened during the canoeing trip four days ago?” He peers over to Taehyung, thankful that the sun has settled, and he cannot see his face flush with humiliation.

Taehyung laughs, leaning on his hands as he throws his head back in amusement. “Of course I do. That’s all everyone talked about for the next day or two.”

“Great.” He rolls his eyes. Of course, the whole damn group would know about it. Hoseok and his big mouth. He should not be surprised at how quickly the news had spread among the camp counselors. Nothing is kept secret for long.

“Yeah. Namjoon had informed us of his plan to put you two together that morning.” Jeongguk’s head snaps to gape at his friend. “We knew something, good or bad, was bound to happen.”

This was a complete setup. The boys went behind his back and planned this whole thing without telling him. “You couldn’t have warned me?” He looks at Taehyung intrusively and shakes his head as his friend laughs. “Whatever dude. Thanks for the heads up.”

“You never would have agreed to it in the first place. Of course, it had to be kept a secret.” Taehyung sits up. “But hey, looks like it worked out in the end. No?”

Jeongguk stays silent, mewling over the rhetorical question. He cannot deny that things have been going well since then in terms of extracurricular activities.

“Do you regret it?”

He picks up a lone branch off the boulder's surface as he considers the question. The atmosphere around the two is getting more serious now that they’re talking about feelings and all, something Jeongguk has a hard time with. He twirls the branch in his hand as he responds, “No, but it’s more of what happened after that caught me off guard.”

His shoulders slump forward while Taehyung stays quiet, waiting for him to continue wordlessly. He has always been a great listener and never pushes the conversation, which he appreciates.

“Well, first and foremost, she apologized to me. But it was what she said after we got back,” he sighs, glancing at Taehyung before gazing back at the lake. “She asked me where we go from there. About us,” the branch in his grasp snapped in two, “and I didn’t have an answer for her.”

“You left her hanging?”

Jeongguk throws the broken branch into the lake, watching as the ripples race across the surface. “I asked her to give me time because I’m not—or at least I wasn’t entirely over the bullshit she’s pulled on me for the past couple of years. It’s difficult to overcome my hatred for the stuff she put me through. But I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’m attracted to her, that I like the feel of her lips on mine.”

Sounds of crickets, frogs, and the occasional fish breaking the surface, fill the silence as he processes that last sentence. The hairs on his arms involuntarily stand on end as he ruminates about your kiss, how soft and delicate they were. However, he cannot help but feel an unsettling churn in the pit of his stomach.

“The only time we spend together alone is when we're fucking. We sort of agreed to this arrangement in the meantime.” Jeongguk shrugs. “We both have admitted being attracted to one another, and it’s been nice and all, but–”

“To be honest, it sounds like you're leading her on though,” Taehyung cuts in, picking up a small rock and toying with it in his hands.

Jeongguk sighed deeply at the thought. “Yeah, I'm realizing that now. I'm starting to feel like I want more,” he admits aloud, speaking this truth for the first time. He has been struggling with this idea for the past few days. The more time he spends with you, albeit it is typically all physical, he finds himself looking forward to the next time you two get to be alone. This time, not only for pleasure.

However, an inkling of doubt still passes through his mind when he considers what a relationship with you would be like. “I’ve never dealt with someone like her before. Someone who would challenge me. I’m used to people being fake nice to me, using me for my status. To have this girl, who doesn't know me or my upbringing, challenge me in every aspect—it intimidated me, to be honest.” He places his head in his palms. “God, I could never let anyone know about that. People would think I'm weak.”

“No, it doesn't mean you're weak at all. She is intimidating.” Taehyung laughs. “She’s a strong woman, and I think that allures you. It’s what attracts you to her.”

He raises his head, hands passing through his hair before bringing them into his lap and relaxing his shoulders. “Yeah, you can say that.”

Again things go quiet around them, while an owl in the distance hoots in the middle of its nightly routine, Jeongguk ponders on that notion. Perhaps Taehyung is right. Independence and assertiveness are qualities he admires in you. However, it was not like that before. He felt replaced when you first stepped into the picture, and he struggled with his jealousy over the attention and responsibility you took away from him.

Taehyung throws the rock he has been playing with into the lake, inevitably breaking the silence. “You should talk to her soon. Especially before the kids arrive on Sunday.”

“Yeah, I will.” He needs to resolve this problem soon. Things would only get messy once the kids arrived.

Taehyung turns to look at him, meeting his eyes with sincerity. “While we can’t control what memories stick with us or not, we can control what we choose to focus on,” he begins, “We can choose to focus and ruminate about past wrongs committed against us, or we can move on from it and make new memories.”

Jeongguk slowly nods, taking it in. He brings his knees to his chest and looks out onto the lake while Taehyung’s words repeatedly play in his mind.

Taehyung rises, wiping the dirt from his rear and stretching his arms over his head. “Let’s head back?”

Jeongguk looks up at him and motions a hand up to him. Taehyung grips his hands and helps him onto his feet. The pair climb down the rock, taking the same path back to the campsite.

—

Jeongguk finds himself alone in the same spot the following evening, on top of the boulder and eyes fixated out onto the lake as he sits with his thoughts. The sun has long since gone down, and the moon is a tad brighter than yesterday, glistening on the lake’s calm surface.

The counselors had called it a night after an exhaustive hiking trip earlier in the day, and he was the last to get out of the shower. He had made his way to his own cabin to follow suit, but Taehyung’s words rang through his head the entire time he lay in silence, and he felt restless, unable to sleep. He had slipped out of his bunk after tossing and turning for over half an hour before he reluctantly got up to get fresh air.

Jeongguk’s gaze would meet your figure as he observed you throughout the hike. He saw how you interacted with others, in awe of how social and outgoing you are. You get along with everyone around you, this he has always known, but he has been more attentive lately. His stomach fluttered when you approached him and wordlessly shared your trail mix with him; the smile on your face when he accepted your offer made his ears hot.

The small action affected him tremendously, and he has not stopped thinking about it since. He is finding that these types of gestures are easy to appreciate coming from you and that it is not difficult to push aside the past resentment he had harbored for years.

He has often caught himself thinking of the possibilities of your friendship had he not been so envious of you. Many ‘what ifs’ have plagued his mind since last night’s conversation.

Taehyung is correct; making new memories is far more effective than continuing to mull over the past.

The rock beneath him begins to feel uncomfortable as he has been sitting out here for some time and not realizing how late it has become. He contemplates heading back and trying to sleep, but the sound of someone setting a canoe in the water catches his attention. From his position on the boulder, Jeongguk can see the camp’s dock extending far into the lake and witness someone climbing in there.

The person begins to paddle to the center, the movement creating ripples along the water’s surface. Who would be out here this late?

Jeongguk stands, stretching from his stiff position, and begins to head back to try and catch some sleep. Whoever that is must want some time alone, and he does not want to intrude. He clears the woods after walking the path back to camp and glances one more time out to the lake to observe the figure in the canoe.

The moon’s light illuminates your figure; he can see your face more clearly from where he stands now. He stops in his tracks. What are you doing out there? He thought he saw you head to bed after he got out of the shower and that everyone was sleeping by this time.

Curious to know what you are up to, he takes light footsteps towards the dock, where several empty canoes lay anchored in the water. The opportunity to discuss the chaos in his mind, the ones he started to unpack with Tae the night before, presents itself at this moment.

You sit idle in the middle of the lake, a place of isolation and room to think. The temperature is warmer than expected; you expected the air to be crisp without the nightly bonfire. Removing your sweatshirt to get more comfortable, you move to sit in the hull of the canoe and use the piece of clothing as a pillow while you lay back to admire the night sky and mull over the current status of your relationship with Jeongguk.

Relationship? It is nothing close to what you would consider a relationship, more like a nonverbal understanding between two people who cannot openly communicate their real feelings. You know this, and you have acknowledged it, but juggling your emotions around him is becoming exhausting. With every touch of his lips on your skin and the roam of his fingers along your curves, you are falling deeper and deeper into something beyond lust.

Yet, you have never felt so lonely, ironically enough, because he may not feel the same way. It is simply an exchange of pleasure; he probably enjoys getting his dick wet and does not want anything beyond a physical relationship. He never gets too intimate, there is little to no kissing between you, and he never spends the night. An unsettling feeling always drops in the pit of your stomach every time he starts to fasten his pants back on. His boundaries are clearly set without having to be voiced.

Jeongguk’s demeanor changes around others. He typically stays on the opposite end of any group activity, as if he is trying to put the most distance between your bodies when around the counselors. He never sits beside you, walks beside you, and avoids talking to you directly. The limited interaction in a public setting is a big contrast to when you are alone. He is all over you, engulfing you in his stature, and you have his complete and undivided attention.

Sex. That is all it is to him.

It sucks. You want more, and it is starting to hurt whenever you get together, but you cannot seem to stop taking the opportunity to have him at every chance. You do not know how much longer you can take this exchange before you regret ever giving yourself to him, waiting on the day he admits not wanting anything more beyond the hook-up.

“Hey.”

Frightened by the sudden voice, the canoe rocks beneath you as you jolt and sit up, startled. “Holy shit,” you almost scream. You meet eyes with Jeongguk’s familiar, nearly obsidian ones. His lips' ends are curled into a soft smile, suppressing a laugh.

His attempt is futile as he lets out a breathy chuckle. “Sorry for startling you.”

Gripping the edges of the canoe, you pull yourself up from the hull and onto the seat as you collect yourself, trying not to outwardly cringe at your obnoxious screech. The blush across your cheeks feels hot while you glance at Jeongguk, only to see him rotating his boat to sit parallel to yours. He sits opposite you, both on either end of your respective canoes, facing one another in the middle of the lake alone. The moon is high in the sky now, signifying how late it is.

“I wasn’t expecting someone else to be in the middle of the lake at a time like this.” You tuck some hair behind your ear, trying to settle the frantic heartbeat in your chest.

Jeongguk places his paddle down before turning his attention back to you. “I saw you paddling out here by yourself. I thought I’d leave you alone for a bit before coming to interrupt.”

“What are you doing outside your bunk so late at night?” you ask.

He shrugs. “Same as you. Thinking. Clearing my head.” Jeongguk pushes a sigh past his lips, a hand running through his hair.

You nod, looking down at your hands and picking at your cuticles while a silent pause settles between you two. Everything around you goes quiet except for the occasional sounds of frogs croaking in the distance. You wonder what he means by clearing his head and why he seems troubled by it. Is he tired of you yet? The topic of his ‘conflicting feelings’ clouds your mind.

“I think it’s time we talk about us,” he says, breaking the heavy silence.

And there it is.

Your eyes immediately move to him in shock, but you quickly divert your attention to the woods behind him, not able to look him in the eyes. With no audible response, you nod for him to continue while you clutch your sweaty hands.

“I want you to know that I don’t regret that day.” he pauses, a blush creeping on his face. “You know, the day out on the river.”

The hazy fog of your first hook-up briefly passes through the front of your mind; now you are also blushing. Your flitting gaze shifts to your hands, the lake around you, and the camp close to shore—you are looking everywhere but at him.

“And all the times we’ve been together since,” he rushes out his words as if reassuring you.

Your ears feel like they are on fire; you want the world to swallow you at this very moment.

Jeongguk coughs, clearing his throat before drawing a breath that releases the tangled knot of words in his heart. “But more importantly, I want you to know I’ve forgiven you. Forgiven you for all the bullshit.”

Your head jerks in his direction. “I—” you start and stop suddenly as he raises his hand to halt your train of thought.

“You don’t need to explain yourself. You’ve already apologized, and I heard the sincerity in your voice. I’m ready to move past it all,” he explains. “I also acted like an ass towards you, and again I apologize for it.”

“I know. I don’t blame you.”

The relief you feel, you feel like a heavy weight has been lifted off your shoulders.

“Can I ask you something?” you question. He nods, motioning you to continue. “That night last year, when it was just the two of us. Do you remember?”

He nods again. “The last night of camp.”

“Yea.” You pause and look away. Maybe you should not bring this up. Perhaps you are reading too much into it. Your mouth feels dry, and the fluttering feeling in your stomach builds as you contemplate the following few words. You return your gaze to him to see him watching you intently, hanging onto your every word. “Why did you let me in? Telling me about your home life, family, and so-called friends. You hated me, yet you opened up that night.”

Jeongguk regards you solemnly as you go back to fiddling with your fingers. That kind of hurt, being reminded how he openly hated you. “Because I overheard you complaining about your mom earlier that night. I empathize with you.”

That night was when he realized that you’re just a regular person. Beyond his hatred, he could see that you also hurt.

“Oh.”

Jeongguk explains further, “I know what it’s like to have unrealistic expectations put on your shoulders, and I thought it could comfort you knowing you’re not alone.”

With your arms cradling your midsection, you look down at your feet. “And it was comforting. You were comforting that night.”

Your mind immediately goes back to that moment your gazes met while talking. That was the first time his eyes were not full of hatred or anger; they were soft and relaxed. He spent the entire summer sending you scornful looks and scrutinizing your every move, but at that moment—the end of camp—you finally saw him like other people did.

The following few words leave your lips without much thought while you lift your gaze back to his face. “If we’re being honest, I wanted to kiss you then,” you tell him, looking down at his lips quickly and then back to his eyes.

“Yeah, I know.” Jeongguk mirrors your actions and peers down to your lips, ones he has become obsessed with lately. They pinch together in haste while your brows crease together in confusion.

“You knew? What—”

“Because I wanted to too. I just didn’t have the balls to actually do it.” He sees the ends of your lips lift, then he realizes what he said. Poor choice of words on his part. “Shut up.” Jeongguk chuckles.

The curve of your smile rests in a straight line after a few moments of shared laughs. With a small voice, you tell him, “I wouldn’t have guessed with the way you greeted me when I arrived at camp.” You look away for a moment, out onto the lake, before you continue, “I thought perhaps we could have reconnected, but you were so quick to insult me that I thought that night meant nothing to you. That what we shared meant noth—”

The words fail to leave your mouth when he grips the edge of your canoe to pull you forward, dragging you closer to him. Your body jolts, but he grabs your hand to balance you.

“I’m sorry for my brash response to you that day. It was extremely immature of me.” He was trading insults with you not long ago, going at each other with no remorse or sympathy. Now he is holding your hand, thumb gently sweeping along your knuckles. “Isn’t it strange to think that just a while back, we were always fighting?” he asks.

“Like cats and dogs”, you quip, “I didn’t ever think we’d be here like this.” You brush your hair off your shoulders and sit up straighter. He can see your mind running, overthinking like you always do. “Where do we go from here?” you whisper.

This moment feels like déjà vu, bringing him back to the day of the canoe trip. This time, he will not leave you hanging as he did.

“Come.”

Jeongguk grips your hands, drawing you to get up as you shakily stand in your canoe, moving one leg at a time to climb over into his. He lets go of one hand to grab your hips, never dropping your hand as he helps you over by carefully pulling you forward, grip tightening as both your feet land steadily in front of him.

Effortlessly he brings you towards him, craving to have you near. Hands moving down from your hip to the back of your thighs to pull you onto his lap. Once again, he finds you straddling him in a canoe. The hairs on his arms stand on end as you snake your arms around his neck for balance. Your fingers feel cold to the touch, making him shiver in your embrace.

Your body is close but he pulls you closer with his hands on your lower back, fingers moving under your shirt to feel your soft skin. The bit of light shining from the bright moon allows him to gaze into your eyes. The silence is comfortable as the abandoned canoe slowly starts to drift away.

Taeyhyung’s words echo in his mind. Leading you on was never his intention, and he only realizes now that he was doing precisely that. All along, he has been thinking about himself and how he may not be ready for a relationship in his final year of school. His life responsibilities will only grow after graduation. Being in a relationship was at the bottom of the list. The next few years are already mapped out for him by his parents; adding a girlfriend onto that would only serve as a distraction.

But everything changed in a span of days. His routine summer camp job did not start like any other ordinary summer; things were different this time. His priorities have been slightly altered after that incident on the riverbank a few days ago. The idea of a relationship is not so bad anymore.

At this very moment, while your warm breath fans across his face, Jeongguk has arrived at the conclusion that he has come to develop feelings for you—that much he is sure about now. He lifts his hand, fingertips brushing against your skin as he sweeps back a strand of hair behind your ear. Maybe whatever he feels is not seasonal; perhaps he wants to have you this close beyond the few weeks of camp.

You feel butterflies fluttering in your stomach the moment he clears his throat. You have been anxiously sitting in his lap for some time with nothing but crickets in the distance, waiting for him to say something as you were too nervous to speak up.

He is playing with the hem of your shirt, diverting his gaze. “I don’t know what the future holds once camp is over,” he begins, “but for the time being, I would like to be with you.”

A wave of euphoria overcomes your body in an instant. Your heart hammers in your chest while your breath hitches in your throat. This time you heard him loud and clear.

“And I don’t mean just sex. I want to actually get to know you better. Like your favorite color, or what type of music you listen to, or where you—”

You cut Jeongguk’s rambling short by reaching for his face. Cool palms against his warm cheeks to pull his jaw upward, so he faces you, eye to eye. The feeling of his hands shaking against your lower back is obvious, he is nervous. “I would like that too,” you say.

Your hands drop to his shoulders now that you have his full attention. He looks like a deer caught in headlights, eyes big and full while he takes in what you said. You take your time to run your fingertips against his skin, up his forehand, playing with the baby hairs along his hairline.

Jeongguk’s hand clutches your wrist, halting your movement. He leans in and captures your lips. You have never kissed him like this before, soft and gentle. You melt into his embrace.

He pulls away, “Also, I’m sorry for being so possessive over you yesterday. I shouldn’t be claiming your pussy—”

“Jeongguk.” You throw your head back, a loud laugh escaping your lungs.

—

The screen door shrieks as Jeongguk nudges it open. He steps out of your cabin, closing the door behind him while you sleep soundly in your bunk, wrapped under your cozy blankets. It has only been a few hours since you two went to bed, but he wanted to leave your cabin before anyone else woke up.

That idea quickly goes down the drain the moment his feet land on the steps, and he hears the sound of someone whistling from afar. Looking up, he glances at the picnic table across the row of cabins. The rest of the group is already up and eating breakfast together, all huddling and scarfing down food, but their attention has strayed from the meals in front of them and to Jeongguk striding out of your cabin.

He makes his way over, shyly walking with his head down and face hot as they continue to holler suggestive comments. The tips of his ears turned hot with every step.

“We all know you’ve been fucking for the past few days. Yall aren’t as sneaky as you think,” Yoongi says. Hoseok snickers and reaches over the table to high-five him as Jeongguk shakes his head and sits on the bench across from Taehyung.

Namjoon slams his cup of orange juice on the table and points directly at him, trying to suppress the ends of his lips from curling. “Once the kids come on Sunday, you two need to be more discreet about your rendezvous.”

Jeongguk rolls his eyes, grunting and leaning over the table with his arms crossed and head down. This could not possibly get more humiliating. But it does as the group continues with the smart-ass remarks and taunting behavior for the next few minutes.

The chatter around him dies down. With full stomachs and chores to do, the camper counselors get up to start their day, leaving Taehyung and him alone at the table. He peers up to see Taehyung come closer, elbows on the table and leaning forward with one eyebrow raised and a smirk etched on his face.

“I see the talk went well.”

He coughs, pulling at the collar of his shirt with his face and neck feeling incredibly warm. It is hard stopping the corners of his mouth from rising, a smile that he cannot hold back. Yeah, he could say the talk went well—really well, but he’s keeping those details to himself.

Their heads snap in the direction of your cabin at the sound of the door swinging open and then slamming back shut. You take the steps down quickly, feet meeting the ground before you look over to them and meet eyes with him, a small smile appearing on your face as you head towards the dining hall for breakfast.

Jeongguk finally responds to Taehyung's observation, his gaze never dropping from yours. “We’re going to take the summer to get to know each other.”

—

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#jjk x reader #jjkxreader #jungkook x reader #jungkookxreader #jungkook #jungkook smut #bts smut #f; paddlewithme

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