#just a lurker finally saying my own thoughts

[usedpidemo]

Update - 3rd year anniversary! (and some future plans, a reflection, etc.)

Hi everyone! π here.

By the time this post is up, it'll be the 13th of May. Three years since I began my writing journey and this Tumblr blog. Three years. Time flies by so fast. I was close to graduating senior high after it was delayed because pandemic, had my graduation in an empty room basically, now I'm hitting my third year of college. Crazy stuff.

With that said, here are the stats + timetable of the blog so far:

First work: Sandwich (Wendy) (published 05/13/21, 4:03 a.m)

Highest note count: Tell your friends (Yujin x Wonyoung) (published 01/14/23, 1274 notes)

Number of works published: 91 fics (1 fic every 12.03 days)

500 followers: June 18, 2021 (36 days)

1000 followers: October 12, 2021 (152 days)

2000 followers: June 18, 2022 (401 days)

3000 followers: November 12, 2022 (548 days)

4000 followers: May 22, 2023 (740 days)

5000 followers: December 18, 2023 (950 days)

Current follower count: 5615 (1 new follower every 5.12 days)

It's been a hectic final month of college, so I apologize for the lack of activity in recent times :< But summer is coming up very soon, so hopefully I'll have all the time in the world to write more till then! I will say, a new fic is on the near horizon, so please be on the lookout!

I would like to take the opportunity to thank every single of you, whether reader, lurker, or a fellow writer for your support! Especially during these lull times, your unwavering support has kept me afloat and has been a motivation in continuing to write. Love you guys as always. Here's to another fruitful year <3

From this point, this part will be an overall reflection and life summary of the previous year, my thoughts on some personal matters, and some ideas I've been contemplating. If you don't wanna read this, you can stop here.

I miss 2023 quite a bit, not gonna lie. I know nostalgia can quickly grow warm and fuzzy, seeing the past through rose tinted lens, but I'll admit that 2024 hasn't been off to the start I envisioned it to be. That year was mostly peak for me, and I could even argue it's my favorite year to live out based on all my experiences. Traveling to new places, finally attending live events, interacting with my K-pop biases, and so on—it really felt like the best was yet to come with how 2023 flowed and transitioned into the new year.

Five months in, and I am struggling. Horribly. Most plans, dreams, and ideas have gone up in smoke, and it's just one devastating gut punch after another. I have a shitty professor in one major that basically made me check out of that class, and I don't know my family will react when I tell them I have to repeat said class because that professor was a dick. My family's been infighting on a daily basis, and I'm mostly collateral damage to them. Not one week can go by without some serious confrontation between them. There was a brief health scare with my mother, but that seems to be a nothing matter; thank God she'll be okay.

All this just makes life so deflating, in all honesty. I get that no life is without struggle, but I genuinely don't know when we'll be in the clear. Not anytime soon, I reckon. In these tough times, there's very little comfort except the past, when everything was pretty all right for the most part. It's been demotivating to write when mom comes forward with another grievance with my sister. It's hard to write when you have a professor who likes to power trip their students into submission. It's hard when you don't know how to admit to your mother that he failed his one class because of said power tripping professor.

But that doesn't mean I will let it eat me alive. I know we've been through some utter lows in the past. And we always get back up. If no one has us, then God does.

Summer break is fast approaching and I want to fix things. Even in my own little way. I know none of what I'm saying has anything to do with writing degenerate stories about hot K-pop idols, but real life circumstances have definitely affected me more than I can brush off. I should be calm, unfazed, undeterred.

After all, some stories are meant to be finished. They just take a more unconventional route. Ask Cody.

With all that being said, I will finish these commissions over the next two months. I'm really sorry to everyone who requested and paid for their stories months and months ago; I genuinely feel bad for not getting these out on time, but I am very mindful of quality control, and I have no one to blame but myself for being a slacker and lazy worker. Despite my feelings, I should remain professional—that's what being a worker means.

A lifestyle overhaul is definitely in my list of things to improve over the summer too. Figuring out how to get writing done, finding ways to alleviate my PokeRogue addiction (GOTY), whilst having a healthy work/life balance and not losing my sanity over it. Or worse, burning out.

And I want to take this opportunity to thank all my friends—peach, caps, majorblinks, chunk, frisky, raf, c.o, levi, sins, iz, ken, v1n, ddeun, notions, kevin, eros, brandon, kaede, svn, frisky, cray, rpg, prael—for putting up with my shit for another year. This life is tough, but you guys make it tolerable. Thank you for letting me air out my grievances even when it wasn't the best time to. I pray that when everything passes, I'm able to repay you all in some shape or form generously.

And to you, dear reader, for making it this far, thank you. Whether you've been with me since day one, or day 1094, as a commenter, reposter, liking, or just passing by/lurking, thank you for giving me a chance. Without you, all of this would have been for nothing. I don't know where I would be now if I didn't take that chance, that leap of faith back in 2021, and it's because of you I am able to keep doing this for the love of the game.

With grace,

Peter / π

#update #anniversary

[maryhadalittlehobby]

Recap of my experiences at the IWTV Premiere April 30, 2024

I found out about if from one of the most unlikiest sources. A person I thought was an even bigger fandom lurker than myself😅 I wasn't even gonna ask but I said fuck it, maybe they know someone who knows someone. And they did but said people were under ndas. Initially said they couldn't say but then last minute said they believe they knew where it was going to be.

I didn't say anything because 1) I didn't want them or their friend to get in trouble by spreading the info. 2) possibly spread misinfomation if that wasn't the place and 3) nobody asked lol

I thought I would just show up and see what I could see. In the past I have done this at a Walking Dead premiere. At that event it turned out that they had a lobby full of props that anyone could enter and take pics of. They even had walkers roaming around. Then the kicker-I got into that TWD premiere TICKETLESS by pure accident! So why not fuck around and find out again.

I put on a "closet cosplay" of Claudia in the upcoming yellow dress using all stuff I already owned and headed out.

I walked up to Mckittrick hotel, asked if there was a standby or waiting list but the person said they didnt know. There was a lot of important looking people surrounded with guards double checking lists and whatnot so I gave up that angle and loitered around with the other 15 or so fans who found the location too hoping to just see a glimpse of our favs.

Didn't have to wait to long as one by one they started showing up. The first one I noticed was Delainey and she slayed in that black sheer number. She was soft-spoken and a little shy but took her time and signed/took pictures with all the people who were there. Not sure if she knew I was cosplaying Claudia but she did compliment my contacts.

I had all my pics on motion video so if I didnt like the actual pic there was a few frames of vid to pick from as well. The actual video is a bonus! Too bad I can only link 1 video here but a lot of vids are on my IG in the highlight. Same name!

Then Sam came. As soon as he exited the car the wind blew his hair back and I lost my train of thought. He is pretty and his eyes are a lighter shade of blue than they look in pics. Also he is blonder! And so slim! The suit they had him in was a fun nod to vintage suits.

He too complimented my contacts! In the vid he is asking me questions about them but as soon as I take the pic another fan was yelling his name and grabbed his attentionl. Not mad lol I probably would have gotten less coherent the more I talked😅

Jacob showed up soon after-all smiles. What a cutey. He was damn near falling in the garbage they had us lowly non invites next to trying to contort this way and that to sign and take pics. Again-so small! And he too complimented my contacts😁 if the suit would have been properly tailored( the pants looked to long!) It would have been slay

Not gonna lie I kinda blacked out after meeting Sam so my memory with jacob is fuzzy.

Assad and Luke arrived together shortly after but got whisked away pretty quickly so I didn't get a pic with them. Eric was the very first to arrive and despite me being there I missed him too.

But I was sooo happy getting the unholy family little else mattered. I contemplated waiting after but I was BUZZING with adrenaline and starving lol. My fandom plug said she did come after and met EVERYONE and their momma. Cast and crew alike and they were still happy to engage even after their long night❤️

Finally Fang Gangers, please do not repost/ reupload/ or screenshot anything of mine as your content. Linking back / sharing is ok.

🖤🧛🏾‍♀️

#iwtv premiere #iwtv cast #amc iwtv s2 premiere #iwtv #sam reid #jacob anderson #delainey hayles

[wifeswarmacademy]

I'm finally joining a lancer game, and I have a lot of thoughts about the system. I gotta say, I feel like the way Ive seen others on here talk about it as a system seems very different from how it appears based on reading the core rulebook (and stats for the free stuff on comp/con). It seems quite limited in terms of what sort of mechs you can create within the system, various prebuilt frames with little room for customization. There are some fun combinations, but its not really building your own guy. (I planning to get an empakaai, grab an impact lance, and get external batteries from tokugawa, so i can melee everyone in a 5 hex line and grapple everyone) In particular im kinda dissapointed that there isnt much interesting for movement. you can run on the ground, with great difficulty you can fly, and you can teleport. Some get some more advanced stuff like blackbeard moving with grappling hooks or deaths head letting you run on walls. As far as I can tell, there is no mechanical support for a mech that moves around as thought they were on rollerskates. Im not joking that this was a major let down when people were talking about being able to recreate their favorite things in mech media, and realizing there wasnt support for this. I understand the lack of rules support is because the way they move with all the different body shapes of the mech is ill defined, but to me it just feels like moving around game pieces when the pegasus in an identical fashion to a raleigh. I just dont get the sensation that my guy is crawling around on the floor in a fucked up way.

I am extremely impressed by how the game handles NHPs. Its rare for a game to get players so excited about the prospect of losing control over something. The mix of mechanical effects and stellar writing makes it just seem really cool to lose control, but I recognize how effective this is is entirely reliant on how good your DM is. The setting is fantastic, and I think there is good reason why when i see people talk about lancer, its so often about the lore. The history of the Union is just great, with everyone ive talked to about it seeming to take different things away from how it operates. In particular, the setup of the game seems to enable just about any type of character people want to play. My friends that made characters vary from over the top and edgy, rogue illegally cloned super soldiers; ironic and amusing, forum lurker turned amateur pilot perpetually hooked into the omninet spewing whatever memes that may or may not be linked to something horrible clawing through to reality; or grounded, a maintenance worker who helped defend a trade ship against pirates and then decided to change profession and receive formal combat training. I would say it is a well done simple RPG with limited options and a phenomenal setting. Simple systems without a lot of numbers are not my bread and butter, but I have to appreciate the style in it.

#lancer rpg

[renardsarcastique]

The Concept of Forgiveness in the Bad

Let me start off that I don't usually make posts on Tumblr (more of a lurker), but this is an idea that I had in my head and that I thought was kind of interesting. This is quite a long post, so forgive me!

I finished watching Hazbin Hotel (a solid series; not 10/10, but I'd say a solid 8/10). The ending definitely felt way too rushed, but that's another post for another time. Let's talk about Charlie.

As we all know, Charlie is the Princess of Hell and heir to the throne. She is *literally* the kindest person in Hell. She wants to see the good in everyone and believes that everyone deserves a second chance. She is big on mercy.

*This might be a little spoilery if you haven't watched the last two episodes of HH, so read at your leisure*

When Vaggie and Lute fight, Vaggie eventually wins, but spares Lute, albeit talking to her more harshly than when Charlie tells Lucifer in their fight with Adam that he's had enough. Lucifer cockily says "How's mercy, bitch?"

In her own way, I think Charlie was still holding on to hope that Adam and Lute would come around in the future now that they had (hopefully) learned their lesson. Adam died (and a lot theorize he could go to Hell, but I'm 50/50 on that; it depends on that story arc), and Lute went back to Heaven.

So, to recap, Charlie, despite fighting with her friends by her side, was still apologetic during that fight and spared mercy to the one angel who had killed Sir Pentious and, at the time to Charlie, Alastor as well. But she showed Adam mercy.

From my own understanding and the few shows I watch, there are not a lot of characters where someone harbors this amount of kindness in them. And to me it's interesting because it really does beg the question: how far does this forgiveness and mercy go? But watching the last two episodes and reminiscing about the season as a whole, it made me think of an anime I used to watch in the early 2000s, specifically 2005. And that anime was Ginga Densetsu Weed (fully on YouTube, by the way).

Now, forgive me while I go on a bit of a tangent but make a connection here.

In the show, the main character is named Weed (given to him by a friend so he wouldn't feel alone), and his father is the protector of the lands and keeps the idea of Paradise, or that all dogs get along. That is until two certain (I think) Great Danes, who are brothers, start to terrorize and destroy any hope of Paradise for the dogs. One of the Great Danes, Hougen, kills a myriad of comrades and kidnaps Weed's father for the majority of the story. Throughout the season Weed encounters others working for Hougen who try to kill him. In one particular case this pair of Doberman brothers. Weed lets them go once after a quick scuffle, but one of Weed's confidants (Jerome) goes against Weed and kills them, saying they would have come back anyway. Filled with horror, Weed sends Jerome away. Others in the pack say Weed is too soft and that this is life and you need to fight to survive. Despite this, Jerome harbored no ill feelings towards Weed and instead worked from afar to keep Weed safe. Over time others from Hougen's pack try to attack Weed's group, but are shown mercy and actually do change.

In the final episode, it's the huge showdown between Weed and Hougen. Weed's father was found and recovered and watches. Weed almost kills Hougen, but he survives. Weed's father tells him to kill Hougen, but Weed can't when he sees Hougen struggling to even stand up. Weed's father says that he'll do it instead as justice for all that were killed. Weed however tells his dad no and shoves him aside. His group reminds Weed of all the evil Hougen has done, but Weed says that killing Hougen would make them just as bad as Hougen is. Eventually, the dude gets killed by a strike of lightning, but Weed says that kindness will definitely get to them (those with a hardened heart).

Okay, so why do I bring this up?

Both Charlie and Weed have this extreme kindness in them and want to spread that kindness to others.

Just like Charlie, who feels so bad for having simple troubled thoughts, says she's "just as bad as the worst overlord", Weed tells the group that killing Hougen, a dog who killed millions of other dogs and kidnapped his own father, would make them just as bad as him.

I feel that when Alastor inevitably betrays the group for his own agenda, things will go awry and there will of course be a huge fight in a case where Alastor is defeated, but Charlie will show him mercy and kindness and ask him to come back to the hotel because that's the kind of person she is. And truthfully, throughout the first season, Alastor did help Charlie along the way, whether genuine or not, so she does see that as a reason to show mercy (when that time comes).

Now I personally LOVE Alastor as a character. I love complex characters whose morals are grey and there's just so much to learn about them. So I hope when he does become the main villain he isn't killed, but that's just a personal gripe I would have.

That's my ramble for now. Maybe I'll make another post about my thoughts on Hazbin.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk!

#hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #hazbin charlie #ginga densetsu weed #alastor the radio demon #charlie morningstar #lucifer morningstar #lucifer hazbin hotel

[bonesandthebees]

Another anon wanting to say thank you for sharing your feelings and offering a space for other people to do likewise. I’ve mostly just been a lurker in the fandom, reading fic and barely even watching any streams, but I’m still gutted by the news and trying to process. And reading your blog has really helped. ❤️❤️❤️

the ironic thing is, right before this, I was starting to think about finally writing my own SBI/DSMP fanfic, only I was intimidated by the thought of having to watch all the streams first. Now I am torn between “I don’t want to write something tainted by an abuser” and “now I have the perfect excuse not to do any research, fanfic is my fandom, power to the people babyyyyy”

I figured as a big name in this fandom, specifically one that's known for how big of a fan I was of wilbur, it just made sense to offer up my own thoughts and let others offer theirs. especially since if you're familiar with my tumblr, you know how much of an active ask community I have.

I'm so glad my blog has helped at least a bit. I'm so sorry you're struggling too, but we're all in this together and I just want everyone to remember that

definitely sit with your feelings for a while to decide if you still feel comfortable writing your fic or not. but honestly I say go for it. don't let this kill the community we have around creativity and passion and art.

#ask #anon #wilbur situation

[elysian0612]

Love Lies — 2

Polyamorous 141/Female reader — 18+, minors do not interact, smut smut smut warnings: vaginal sex, dirty talk, voyeurism, ghost is a lurker 100%, swearing, you have been warned

Taglist: @cassiecasluciluce

————————————————————————

His arms were wrapped around your waist, his head buried into the soft skin of your neck. Kyle’s fingers dug into the flesh of your ass, hiking you up so you could wrap your legs around his middle.

His pants were shoved down to his knees, hard cock buried in your cunt. Kyle peppered small, open mouthed kisses to the column of your neck, his teeth grazing your flesh. Sharp canines gently bit into you, his tongue lapping to soothe the pain.

“Fuckin’ hell. You’re so good f’me. Such a pretty girl,” Kyle gushed, breathing in the aroma of your perfume. Everything about you was so familiar. He pulled down the front of your dress, carefully plucking each of your arms from the holes before tackling your bra. His lips latched onto a nipple, sucking your breast into his mouth, rolling the needy bud between his teeth. You jerk, surprised, and he laughs.

“Needy thing, aren’t ya?” You can only nod, your words coming out as small garbled mutters. More. Faster, please. Fuck. Kyle. You threw your head back against the wall, eyes rolling into the back of your head. You cling to him tighter, whimpering into his ear. He tells you his truest desires, the ones he’s kept to himself since the moment you met. Such dirty, filthy things.

How he’s always wanted to see what you looked like when you came. What you would sound like screaming his name. He confessed how every time you had holstered your gun, he felt the urge to wrap his fist around his cock until he no longer ached.

You moaned, heels digging into his back as you tugged at the dark curls atop his head. His cock thrust into you with every roll of your hips, the base of his pelvis grinding against your clit.

“Dirty girl. You like it when I fuck you?” Kyle asked, his voice wavering. He began to pant, the muscles in his back clenching.

Your fingers drifted beneath his shirt, clawing at the skin of his back. Kyle’s grunts filled your ears, eliciting a shiver that ran up your spine. He hit a deeper spot within you, and you nearly screamed.

“Fuck, Kyle, yes!”

Your enthusiasm only urged him on, deepening the resolve within him. He shifted, letting one of your legs drop to the ground. His hips angled with yours, and tears blurred your vision.

“That’s it, babe. Gonna cum on my cock, yeah?” he purred, lips finding the shell of your ear. The skin of your back was scratched raw from the brick wall of the bar. Your cunt clenches when he reaches down to rub small circles on your clit, and you mewl as your orgasm finally sinks in.

You can feel him pulsing inside of you, his cock twitching with each thrust. All rational thought left your head the moment Kyle slotted his drunken lips against yours.

Kyle isn’t wearing a condom, you try to remind yourself. You’re on the pill, a voice murmurs, and you realise it’s your own voice, begging him to fill you. He whimpers, rutting into you once more before he empties himself inside your cunt.

“Fuckin’ hell, babe,” he pants, bringing his forehead to rest against yours. He’s still inside of you, but he picks you up, gently rearranging your dress. He makes you presentable again, as if you hadn’t just had the best sex of your entire life. His hands are soft and warm against your skin, and he pulls your panties up, his semen still dripping from you. He puts your bra back on, kissing along your skin tenderly.

Kyle smiles then, and brushes his nose against yours as he pulls at his pants, buckling his belt back up. His arms reach around to rub your aching back, and you sink into him, finally allowing yourself to relax. To fall into him. He holds you upright, his eyes gazing into yours.

They beg you not to say anything. To just let him take care of you. You reach your hand up to cup his jaw, the pads of your thumbs rubbing across his cheek. The action is affectionate; the act of a lover. A partner.

You’re so enamoured with Kyle that you don’t notice the masked man leaning against the adjacent wall, lit cigarette in hand, his line of sight fixated on you and your paramour.

————————————————————————

Ghost tells himself that he didn’t care. He had no reason to, you weren’t his. You didn’t belong to him. Yet he couldn’t help the jealousy stirring within his stomach. Was it jealousy, or was it unease? Disgust? He couldn’t tell.

His lips curled around the lit cigarette, inhaling a puff as the smoke filled his lungs. Annoyance settled deep within him, and he crushed the soiled cigarette beneath his boot.

He pushed off the wall, grasping the handle of the door. Ghost huffed, settling back beside Johnny at the bar. Price stalks up behind him, gazing at the lieutenant curiously before ordering another drink. They all suspected you two had gone off to engage in drunken behaviour, but only Ghost had visual confirmation.

The three men drank in silence before you and Gaz returned, disheveled and hazed. The three greeted you both upon your return before everyone disembarked back to base, an awkward silence filling to air as no one dared to speak.

————————————————————————

Everyone had gathered around the common room, sipping on their choice of beverages.

You were curled up in a blanket beside Kyle on a sectional while Soap and Price were sprawled across the couch. Ghost sat stiffly in a cushioned chair, gently gripping the mug of tea you had given him.

The room was silent until Soap spoke.

“So, lass, where ye from?”

“Canada, actually. Moved to England when I was thirteen,” you explained. Your accent still lingered, muddied with some sort of British accent you had picked up over the years. “Enlisted in the army when I turned eighteen.”

Kyle perked up, reaching over to ruffle your hair. “That’s where she met me. Ain’t that right, Rhea?”

You huffed, swatting at his stray hand. Insufferable bloke. A smile crossed your lips as you shoved him away, humming in confirmation.

“Yes, that’s how Kyle and I met. We served together before you snatched him away,” you grinned, offering the captain a small glare. It was all play.

“Sorry, love,” Price quipped, and you brushed it off.

“I’m here now, so it doesn’t matter. Glad you finally realised Kyle wasn’t the only cream of the crop.”

That made them laugh. You made them laugh. Even Ghost let out a chuckle beneath his breath.

“Why do they call you Reaper?” Price asked, even though he already knew. Kyle smirked from beside you, tilting his head. He, too, already knew the reason.

“Born on Halloween, sir. Mates thought it would be funny to name the sniper ‘Grim Reaper’. My friends call me Rhea.”

The men chuckled, shaking their heads in amusement as you finished your explanation. You had always hated the name, preferring to call yourself Rhea, the name of your favourite goddess.

You were a medic. It was your job to save lives, not end them.

A peaceful quiet hung in the air, and you cuddled back into the cushions beside Kyle.

Hours drifted by, and you had become dead to the world, wrapped inside your blanket, head peeking out. You had fallen asleep to the noises of Soap’s sketching and the gentle hum of the air conditioning. Kyle and Soap had also been lured into dreams of their own, leaving Price and Simon alone with their thoughts.

The Captain stood from his place on the couch, crossing the room with stealth before he picked you up.

You stirred slightly as he wrapped you in his arms, holding you tightly against his chest. You whimpered, burying your head deeper into his chest before falling into your slumber once more.

Price could feel something warm within him at the sight of you pressed against him. It captivated him.

He turned, giving Simon a gentle nod as he carried you back to your barracks. Upon arrival, he gently opened the door and tucked you beneath your covers.

You mumbled, reaching for his hand as he turned to leave.

“Thank you.”

The Captain blushed, ever so faintly. “You’re welcome, love.”

————————————————————————

Now, a knock echoed off of your door, and you were yanked from your sleep. You groaned, head pulsing as you dragged yourself out of bed. You opened the door, and Kyle stood in front of you.

Your cunt clenched, aching at the too faint memories from last night.

Fuck.

You pulled him inside of your bedroom, locking the door behind him. Kyle’s eyes are pleading.

“Don’t tell me that it was a mistake,” he whispers. He reaches for your hand, and grabs your waist. You don’t tell him to stop. You don’t push him away. Instead, you tell him the truth.

“I love you, Kyle. I have spent everyday loving you since the moment we met. I yearn for you. I need you.”

Your confession breaks something within him. He pulls your body into him, cradling your head against his chest. For ten years you had known Kyle Garrick, and in those ten years, you had fallen for him. Under the premise of friendship, you had managed to hide your feelings.

His eyes shine with tears, and he looks like he’s on the verge of breaking down. You reach up, pressing your lips against his. Kyle pulls away, slowly, almost as if he’s in pain.

“I love you more than the stars love the moon.”

[recurring-polynya]

Hello! Long time lurker. I've really enjoyed reading your work and especially love Heart is a Muscle and the way you characterise all the different relationships in it! My ask is how do you think Byakuya finds out about RenRuki. I feel like it would be one of those moments where subconsciously he'd see it coming but at the same time still be caught of guard and manage to be very Byakuya about it.

This was one of those where I wasn't quite sure if it was an ask or a fic request, but the fact is I have an old chunk of story sitting around that addresses this very question. I guess I intended to someday throw this into some post-Heart is a Muscle story, and maybe I still will, but who knows if I'm ever going to get there, so you can have it now. Takes place after everyone gets home from the Blood War (where Rukia and Renji had to confess to each other in the middle of bankai training because I thought it would be cool it was weighing on their hearts)

(I wrote this in 2019 and gave it only light edits)

| read on ao3 | request guidelines |

⚔️ 🕶️ 💕

The sun was starting to go down when Kuchiki Byakuya arrived at Practice Field #3. On a normal day, work hours would be long over, although one might find an industrious officer out in this part of the division grounds, training on their own, or a few of the younger ones playing a game of pick-up football. Tonight, it was quiet.

It had been nine days since Kurosaki Ichigo had defeated Yhwach.

A young human girl was perched on the fence surrounding the field, chatting animatedly with Byakuya's ridiculous adjutant, who snapped to attention when he sensed the approach of his commanding officer.

"Good evening, sir!" Abarai Renji barked. "Thank you for agreeing to this! I hope you don't mind, but I asked Inoue Orihime to come."

The girl hopped off the fence and bowed deeply. "Hello, again, Captain Kuchiki, sir!"

"Worried that I won't hold back?" Byakuya asked with a coolly raised eyebrow.

"Oh, I know you won't," Renji replied. "She's here so that I don't hold back."

Byakuya guffawed, and one side of his mouth quirked up. "Congratulations, Lieutenant. You've finally managed to say something humorous."

"You feeling good today, sir?" Renji asked, just a tinge of concern in his voice. "You feeling up for this?"

"I am fully recovered, thank you," Byakuya sniffed. "Yourself?"

"Feelin' good, sir."

"Then let us begin."

"Oh, one last thing, Captain. Would you mind leaving your scarf with Orihime, here? I wouldn't wanna get my blood all over another one."

"Truly, Lieutenant, you are on a roll today," Byakuya noted, unwinding the scarf from his neck and draping it around Orihime's.

"Oooh, it's so light!" Orihime cooed. "It's like nothing!"

"I'll tell Kurosaki to get you one for your birthday," Renji teased.

"Are you ready now?" Byakuya demanded.

"Yep, enough stallin'. Let's do this."

Orihime hopped back up on the fence and called up a shield in front of herself. "Good luck, Renji!" she called.

Abarai shot her a wink and took up his position on the field.

Byakuya placed his hand on the hilt of his sword, but did not draw it.

Abarai drew his and silently released into shikai. He bounced lightly on the balls of his feet. "Might wanna release, sir."

"I shall be the judge of that."

Renji gave a little nod. "As y'like. BANKAI!"

It was common knowledge that Abarai had unlocked a second level to his bankai in the Royal Realm. Byakuya was looking forward to seeing it actually, but he wasn't particularly concerned about it.

Byakuya knew quite a bit about zanpakutou and their releases. It did happen occasionally that a sword would reveal itself in stages, but it tended to retain its essential character.

Hihiou Zabimaru was an excellent bankai, powerful and versatile. It required immense spiritual pressure, iron concentration and significant amount of mental bookkeeping, Byakuya was given to understand. It had served Abarai well in his ill-advised hijinks up until now, but the fact was, it would not be truly formidable until Abarai himself had another half-century or so under his belt. It was too bulky, too finicky, too fragile. There was no other way to master bankai like that, only experience. Byakuya knew a quite bit about bankai like that, himself.

Abarai launched himself at his captain, blade swinging.

Byakuya went to shikai as he drew his zanpakutou, petals pouring forth from his sheath and forming a shield in front of him.

Abarai's blade sliced right through it.

Byakuya flash-stepped away, sweeping Senbonzakura's blades into a more solid foundation, only to find them knocked out of the way by a giant skeletal hand. Another flash step, another regrouping, and Abarai was there again.

Suddenly, it dawned on him. Hihio Zabimaru had been a joke. A prank. A giant, heavy, impossible-to-use freight train that Abarai had taken in stride, as he did every other misfortune that fate heaped upon him. It was a shadow, an echo of Abarai's real bankai.

So-oh Zabimaru also took immense spiritual pressure to summon, that much was still true. But the bulk, the unwieldy mass was gone. It was as if though Abarai's new spiritual armor was plugged directly into his spinal column. It moved with him weightlessly, astonishingly fast.

Something else had changed, too. Something about Abarai's spiritual pressure. It was more unified, more focused, more together. For the first time out of the many, many times Byakuya had fought his lieutenant, he did not feel like he was being attacked by an angry, flailing youth, but that he was facing a worthy adversary.

Byakuya was being pressed harder and harder to defend against Abarai's assault.

And the fact was, he was not fine.

The injuries inflicted on him by As Nodt were grievous. He was lucky to be alive, and if it weren't for Kirinji's healing springs, he probably wouldn't even be able to summon his zanpakutou. His soul was damaged, and although he had made a miraculous recovery, he was not completely made whole. His speed was close to what it once was, and his bond with Senbonzakura was as strong as ever, but his power and endurance were greatly compromised. He could go to bankai if needed, but it was extremely taxing, and Shuukei Hakuteiken was, at the moment, out of his reach.

He thought it wouldn't matter.

Abarai had never even come close to beating him.

Abarai wouldn't notice such a weakness and furthermore, was too sentimental to exploit such a--

He had brought Inoue.

Abarai knew exactly what he was doing.

“BANKAI!” Byakuya called out.

Abarai smirked. “You shouldna let me get that head start, Captain.”

---

"Renji, he's waking up!"

The world swam into view, tinted orange.

"Hey, Captain!" Abarai's grating bark rang out. "How you feel?"

"I feel fine," Byakuya snapped, starting to sit up.

"Lie down please, I'm almost done, but not quite," Orihime said firmly.

Byakuya put his head back down on the ground, and replayed the last few moments of the fight in his head.

Abarai had come out aggressively, going to bankai immediately. He had never allowed Byakuya to gain a solid footing, and pulled out his strongest attack, which Byakuya had never seen, as soon as he possibly could. Byakuya hadn’t even been able to get a good look at it, he only had the impression of fangs before becoming completely overwhelmed. Abarai, who knew his attack patterns, who knew that it took him a minute or two to work up a full head of steam, had bet everything he had on defeating Byakuya immediately and it had worked.

It had been a rout, an utter humiliation.

Byakuya could still beat his adjutant, surely, but he could no longer plow him over with superior strength, and certainly not in his degraded condition. He was going to need to think up counterstrategies. And some of them were not going to work.

He looked down at his chest and realized that his shihakushou had been sliced from shoulder to hip, and was soaked, absolutely drenched with blood.

"You didn't cut me in half, did you?" he sneered.

"No, you were definitely all still, um, attached," Renji clarified.

"Not by much, though," Orihime mumbled.

Renji nudged her firmly in the shoulder.

Orihime waved her hands, and the healing bubble collapsed into nothingness. "All done!"

Abarai held out a hand. With a twinge of reluctance, Byakuya took it, and let the younger man haul him to his feet.

Orihime scrambled up, pulling the scarf over her head, and offered it back. "Thanks for letting me watch! That was a really fun fight! You're both so, so strong and it's so much nicer when no one actually wants to kill each other."

"Hey, we don't wanna keep everyone waiting, right, 'Hime?" Renji said, glancing sideways at his captain. "We got dinner plans, everyone's leavin' tomorrow."

"Yes, Rukia mentioned it," Byakuya replied dryly.

"You okay to--"

"Stop checking on me, you fool. I have said I am well and I dislike repeating myself."

Renji nodded quickly. "Thanks for the fight, sir. I'll see you in the morning."

Three hours later, Byakuya sat in his office.

He was thinking.

He was thinking about the current state of the Gotei 13, the captain-less squads, the loss of highly seated officers. He was thinking about his Third Seat, who had never exactly been lieutenant material and was currently on medical leave after having his sword-arm completely reconstructed.

Byakuya looked up at the sound of the door opening.

"Uh, hi, Captain," Abarai said, clearly surprised to see him. "What are you doing here so late?"

"This is my office, is it not?" Byakuya snapped.

"Well, sure," Abarai replied, walking over to his own desk. "I left my sunglasses here," he explained, sticking them on top of his head.

"It's dark out," Byakuya pointed out.

"I'll need 'em in the morning," Renji shrugged. He frowned thoughtfully, then pulled open his filing cabinet and withdrew a folder. "Speaking of which, I was gonna give you this tomorrow, but as long as we're both here..."

He crossed the room and extended it.

Gingerly, Byakuya took it, then squinted at the notation on the tab. "Strongly Worded Letters to the Management of Squad 11?"

Abarai's eyes widened. "Oh, no, that was just to keep people from poking around. It's actually...well, it's pretty obvious what it is," he finished lamely.

"You aren't ready,"' Byakuya snarled.

"I'm...what?"

"Yes, your new bankai is very powerful, it is true. But just because you have run roughshod over a few enemies with it hardly means you're ready to strike out on your own. You need more training, more control. A bankai like that can land you in hot water as well as it can save you. Furthermore, there's a shortage of competent lieutenants, it would be foolhardy indeed for you to set forth without experienced backup, and don't tell me you're even thinking of the Seventh. I have heard how you and Lieutenant Iba are when you two are unsupervised."

Abarai's face was twisted in utter befuddlement. "Sir, what are you talking about?"

Byakuya flipped the folder open and stared at the neat stack of papers within. "This isn't an Intent to Test for the Captains' Exam," he said, taken aback.

Renji made a choking noise. "No, sir! Cripes, sir, I just got a new bankai, why would I leave? I need you to help me learn to use it. An' I wouldn't leave you, anyway, not while you're still, you know. From the As Nodt thing. Also, who the hell wants to be captain of anywhere but the Sixth?" His voice rose steadily in both volume and pitch as he babbled.

"There is no need to shout, Lieutenant," Byakuya frowned, looking down again at the stack of papers.

It was a copy of form RHCA-48-006-C, an application to become a Family-Approved Suitor.

Stupidly, Byakuya's eyes drifted over the names written into the form's blank spaces. "With the submission of this form, Abarai Renji, Assistant Captain of the Sixth Division of the Gotei 13," (did he really need to write all that out? It barely fit in the space) "requests the approval of the Kuchiki family to court Lady Kuchiki Rukia, Assistant Captain of the Thirteenth and First Daughter of the Kuchiki."

Oh.

Oh.

---

Byakuya sat in the garden, on the bench near the koi pond. His brain was chasing about in aimless circles, much like the fish in the pond.

"Brother?"

He looked up from the water. His sister was still dressed, despite the late hour. Byakuya recalled that she had been out earlier with Abarai and their human friends. Her hair and makeup was different from the way she wore it for formal events, sharper, wilder. It seemed surreal that parts of the city had been reduced to dust, while others had come through virtually untouched. That despite it all, life continued on.

"Are you alright?" Rukia asked, her brow creased with worry.

Byakuya smiled at her gently, affectionately. He thought about the great lengths he had once gone to protect her from the world, and now she, a woman with one of the most beautiful and deadly bankai he had ever seen, was fussing over him.

"I am fine, Rukia," he reassured her. "Will you sit with me?"

He had expected her to perch at the other end of the bench, a nervous bird, always ready to take flight. Instead, she sat close to him, and with an egregious disregard for propriety, took one of his hands between her own, holding it in her lap. "Renji's sorry, you know. He thought he should have waited another week or two, but I said--"

"He should not be,” Byakuya said stiffly. “Another week or two would have made no difference. I do not wish to speak of it further."

"Did you have something to eat--"

"Did you know that my lieutenant is in love with you?"

It was dark, so he couldn't see if Rukia's cheeks turned pink, but he did catch the shy smile that crossed her lips before she turned her face away self-consciously. Long ago, he had caused her normally unflappable sister to make that face once, maybe twice. It was possibly his greatest achievement.

"He, ah, mentioned something to that effect the other day,"

Byakuya was fairly certain that Abarai wouldn't have proceeded without Rukia's buy-in, but he felt it prudent to double-check. "I take it you... reciprocate?"

She made a pleased little hum. "He only happened to mention it at all because I had just told him that I was in love with him."

Byakuya often enjoyed whimsically deriding his ridiculously hardworking and absurdly devoted adjutant, even more so in the presence of his sister, whose affection for the man had long been obvious, if not the degree of it. But he couldn't bring himself to make jokes, not right now.

"You do not need my permission to take up with him romantically," he pointed out. "You and I have had a long-standing agreement, that as long as you were discreet about it--"

"Renji and I don't want that," Rukia interrupted. "I mean, we do. We do want to take up romantically." She made an odd face at having to say the phrase out loud. "But you're very important to both of us. We wanted you to know. We… wanted you to approve."

Byakuya glanced over at the young woman who he had adopted so many years ago, and yet, had only recently become his sister. She was, in so many ways, much like himself in his youth. Brash. Stubborn. Willful. Too brilliant by half. Byakuya adjusted his hand in hers, and gave it a gentle squeeze.

"You know I am a sentimental fool," he began, and Rukia turned to look at him again with an expression he couldn't quite parse. "I think it is embarrassingly obvious how fond I am of both of you."

Emotion broke over Rukia's face. "It is not, Brother," she tried to scold him, though her voice cracked at the end.

"He hardly deserves you," Byakuya went on.

Rukia rolled her eyes. "The two of you are so--"

"But at least he acknowledges that, and seeks to remedy it," Byakuya ignored her. "I shall be watching closely to make sure he does not become complacent, but if he continues on his current trajectory, he may eventually become worth your affection."

"So, are you going to approve his stupid form?" Rukia asked.

"That," replied Byakuya, "is a different matter."

"Oh," Rukia said softly.

"Becoming a Family-Approved Suitor has nothing to do with whether or not I like him. It is an opening of negotiations, a proof of suitability for marriage. Surely, you two don't…" He trailed off when he saw Rukia looking away again.

"We've only just started figuring this out," she admitted. "But it's not...out of the question."

"Oh," Byakuya replied. He'd always had the distinct impression that his sister had little interest in matrimony, although he knew as well as anyone the difference the "who" of the equation could make.

"That presents...a difficulty," he admitted. "The Family would not take it well. They already think I have been too selfish in these matters.”

“That’s so short-sighted,” Rukia muttered. “So he doesn’t have much money or a name that goes six generations back. He’s got bankai. He’s incredibly strong. The family hasn’t even produced anyone who can pass the vice-captain’s exam in the last hundred years.”

"You misunderstand me, Sister," he clarified. "Bringing Abarai into the family would be a tremendous benefit to me, personally. I lack for neither money nor familial pedigree. The only thing I lack is a family line. A young man of immense spiritual pressure, with no family ties of his own, and an inexplicably fierce loyalty to myself would be of great benefit to our line and perhaps to our family as a whole. It would not be very advantageous to those who are jostling to prove themselves the best among a number of poor choices. The family has not been to war in a long time, and many forget how important it is to maintain our strength. I have not forgotten.”

Rukia’s eyes widened. “You wouldn’t name him…”

Byakuya made a horrified face. “Of course not.” He frowned. “Not for the family. But the Captain of the Sixth need not also be the head of the family. I told the Head Captain a year ago he was the only one I trusted to replace me in that regard, although I doubted my posthumous opinion would be respected. I suppose I should tell Kyouraku the same. This would make things a bit smoother, I suppose.” He was quiet for a moment. “I will need to think on this. I might.... I might need to talk to Grandfather. I… will do what I can.”

Rukia eased her hand from his, and slid her arms around his waist and leaned into his side. “Thank you, Brother. I love you.”

Byakuya closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He hardly deserved her, either. He pulled one arm out of her hug and rested it gently around her shoulder. “Thank you, Rukia,” he said softly. Another deep breath. “I love you, too.”

Her only response was to hug him just the teeniest bit harder.

#renruki #byakuya kuchiki #renji abarai #rukia kuchiki #1M words request event #my writing #this is cheating because i wrote this ages ago #but i felt bad for taking too long on my current request so please enjoy this one to tide you over #i have always been very fond of it #you can definitely see the. like. where 4 of my other fanfics came out of this one #also sorry if it doesn't have a great story cadence it wasn't really meant to stand alone but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[floradinterlunium]

The Varying Degrees of my Tolerance Levels

I have all the tolerance in the world for people that don’t ship any BTS member.  Seeing Jikook as a couple does take watching BTS content and seeing their progression. Minus GCFT there isn’t just one moment that makes them real, and if you are a hardcore Kpopper you may just simplify things to fan service.  While I disagree with this analysis I tolerate it because it’s ultimately harmless and I can’t force someone to take the time to watch content and see it.

I also have tolerance for the more insecure Jikookers that teeter between believing they are a couple and not for reasons such as not seeing them hanging out as much anymore. These individuals lie at the very edge of my tolerance but they are also harmless and probably very young and don’t understand relationships well. They see Jikook as a trilogy  but since the final volume hasn’t been released yet they suspend belief. 

Who I have ZERO tolerance for are insecure Jikookers that are insecure because of Taekook. I actually struggle to believe these people are Jikookers at All. I’m more inclined to think these are taekookers in disguise because who in their right mind goes from shipping Jikook to taekook???!! There’s literally nothing Romantic about Tae and Jks relationship. They are so obviously just friends that it’s comical to think they’re people existing that think otherwise. Taekook proof is : they hang out with each other! That’s literally it! 

With the plethora of evidence we have from Koreans themselves that they lived together, the numerous sightings of them on couple holidays, them wearing couple outfits, GCFs, Jikooks own words that they are always together,  I can’t see how anyone would then say no Taekook are a couple because they’ve been hanging out more recently ! Like the math isn’t mathing. One doesn’t become a Jikooker-watch GCFT see how JK negatively reacted to JM being busy etc. then look at recent events and think OH MY Tae are friends doing friend things…this must mean Jikook and all that we have must not be real and Tkk must be because we’ve seen that they hang out mostly in groups and they shared a car once…😒 y’all these aren’t insecure jikookers these are taekookers LOL don’t let them fool you! 

I’ve been in this fandom for a very long time. Taekookers are known for lurking on Jikook blogs and accounts and pretending to be harmless insecure jikookers. They even create dummy profiles with the bare minimum of Jimin and JK related post to convince you they are who they say they are but push and prod enough and you’ll discover they are taekookers.

I write this because I just encountered one on my blog! I deleted their comments to some of my post but my gut was telling me this was a taekooker. I went to their blog and like I thought they have 2 Jimin photos posted and 1 jk photo. It was a new account and no bio. Not saying true jikookers don’t lurk, I was once a lurker,  but because I’ve been here for so long my spidey senses were tingling. I could be wrong but I strongly doubt it. They come to our blogs to spread chaos and confusion. For us true jikookers it makes us angry and for those genuinely teetering Jikookers it makes them more insecure bc it makes them feel like they are not seeing something and maybe their perception is what’s off. Don’t listen to them don’t engage them. 

I will engage an outright Taekooker but I will not engage an “jikooker” insecure because of taekook. 9 times out of 10 these are taekookers in disguise coming to our spaces to spread chaos! 

Word to the wise! Every blogger should delete and not engage them! They spread chaos and sew seeds of discontent and it always leads to us bickering amongst ourselves.

I as a person that loves to debate and telling you don’t engage them! You can’t debate a person dishonest about their identity…so delete their comments and asks and move on! 

I have seen this horse and pony show ! Believe me taekookers are losers with no life and are actually so insecure in their ship that they come to our spaces to shut us up because they don’t want to believe taekook is t real and we make too much sense! Delete and don’t engage!

I will delete any comment from what I perceive to be a fake jikooker. I don’t mind disagreements but I have a good eye for snakes and wolves.

#jikook #kookmin #jungkook #jimin #bts jimin #bts jungkook #wolves in sheeps clothing #i will delete comments from fake jikookers

[hotcheetohatredwastaken]

20 questions for fic writers

I was tagged on this by @unexpectedstormy ! I wasn't sure whether I was supposed to respond like it was a chain or make my own post, so I just went for it

1. How many works do you have on A03?

Two. There will be more coming, because Blood Drops on Roses is just arc one of this story, and there's a lot of snippets for Prologue floating around.

Blood Drops on Roses: Linked Universe

BDOR Prologue: The Yiga and The Sheikah

2. What's your total A03 word count?

51,493 words since mid-August, when I finally got an account XD I've been a lurker for YEARS ya'll.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Linked Universe only, so far.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

See above XD I hope to get enough fics out there that I can sort my work like that, but for now it's just those two.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes, I respond as soon as I can, they are like crack to me. Maybe because I'm new to sharing my work or something, but I would die for each and every one of you that leaves even as much as a <3

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

NONE OF MY FICS ARE FINISHED YET AAAAAAAAAA. Arc 1's ending is going to be pretty angsty though.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hm, I see that this questionnaire is not meant for me. There is a Prologue section "The Trap" that I'll be putting out soon through, its ending is pretty sweet I would say.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not yet. I am afraid that it's gonna happen, but so far everyone has been so nice, so I hope not D:

9. Do you write smut?

Nah. Don't really read it either. Just not my thing.

10. Do you write crossovers?

I mean unless you count LU as a crossover between all the Link's respective fandoms, no

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Gosh I hope not. How does one steal a fic?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope. If I ever get good enough at Spanish, I would like to take a crack at translating my own fic once its all published, but it would probably be laughably terrible. Eh, practice is practice.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not yet. Hey @needfantasticstories, I think Clippy Wind and Pug Sky need to go on some adventures together, don't you?

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Tbh I don't really ship. I do think Malon/Time and Legend/Ravio are cute though. I'm just not really interested in exploring the romantic side of stories, even in published literature.

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Geez I hope that I finish all of Arc 2 at this point. But I may be too early into the game to answer this.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Heck if I know. I had someone say in my comment section that they liked how I characterize people, so we'll go with that.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I write too much and probably in too much detail. Sometimes it would be better to say "They crossed the bridge and set up camp" but nooooooooooo lets add 7,000 words to this already bloated fic.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Italics. I was about to whip out my decade of Latin for part of this fic, but I decided against it because I'm pretentious but not that pretentious. Also because I still don't understand word order at ALL.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Now that I'm thinking about it, I think I have some fanfic from the dog series of Warrior Cats lurking somewhere that I wrote when I was like 12. Survivors, or something? I should probably go delete it, I'm sure it's trash. I'm scared to even look, it probably hasn't seen the light of day since I wrote it.

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

Well I've only got one big fic out right now so let's go with BDOR

@needfantasticstories and @somer-writes I'm kicking this your way.

#linked universe #lu #linkeduniverse #cheetoanswers #ao3 #linked universe fanfic #hope i did this right #I'm just kinda new so idk how to do this crap lol #bdor #blooddropsonroses

[darkcircles4lyfe]

fyi: I’m staying away from leaks

If you want to know my thoughts about recent events, here they are:

So idk if I’ve ever mentioned this before, but when I started watching and reading bnha I made a point not to engage with the fandom until I was caught up, because I didn’t want spoilers. When I finally made it to the current chapter, it was around the end of the first war. That’s when I started looking at what other people were saying, and that’s when I found out about when/where leaks were. I’ve been tuning in ever since, for a few reasons that I only rarely stop to interrogate. First and foremost: I’ve liked the extra time to prepare what I want to say if the chapter contains a major revelation or cliff hanger I want to write about. It’s satisfying to punctuate my Sunday morning with a fully fleshed out essay I can immediately post. Then of course it’s also fun to participate in the Moment that leaks create, especially because they unfortunately tend to make the officials feel like an afterthought. And let’s not lie to ourselves—a major reason we tune in is because of FOMO. Everyone else is doing it. You don’t want to be left out of the conversation and not know what’s going on. I especially wanted to know ahead of time about lines that might get butchered in the official English translation. It was nice knowing that Horikoshi didn’t write that “Swiss cheese” line, right? These are some understandable reasons.

But since the routine got disrupted a little, I kinda got slapped in the face with enough clarity to start asking myself: what would I actually get the most enjoyment out of? Because when I heard the (now outdated) news that leaks were no more, I was actually relieved. So. That’s cause for some reflection. I’m like, man, what if I did tune out of social media entirely, wake up on Sunday, have my nice little home cooked breakfast, and read the new chapter for the first time over a cup of tea. What if I experienced the surprises as I turned the page and they stared me in the face, with Horikoshi’s beautiful artwork in HD.

Sure, I’d need to catch up after the fact if there’s any translation fuckery, but that’s okay. That’s doable. Bless the folks who take the time to comb through the Japanese and explain the nuance to everyone else. This is tangential, but I’ve also started thinking even more about how satisfying it would be to edit my own versions (for personal use only of course). That’s a… long-term goal, but maybe it’ll take care of my annoyance with the ‘official’ blunders and bad dialogue. The point is, idk if making myself aware of that stuff should be my #1 priority, above even reading the chapter in the first place. If anything it just makes me more pissed off and fixated on what might be wrong. Which is valid… but distracting. I should prioritize having fun as much as I can.

The other thing is, I’m kind of a social media lurker anyway. I don’t say much in the moment, and I don’t post often. On twitter I mostly just engage in other people’s comments. And it’s not like thousands of people are waiting to hear what I think. Like I said, my personal incentive is to get a head start on analyzing so I can pull together a long, thoughtful response in a more timely manner. But I don’t have to do that. I might as well just embrace my cryptid tendencies—you get my two cents whenever I feel like crawling out of my well.

I don’t want to moralize this whole thing, ask you to think about how the sausage gets made, but I will say I’m looking forward to finding out about big moments without seeing them in the form a short summary tweet first. I mean, c’mon… leakers know how to build hype to an extent but it’s still no substitute. It’s like listening to a sportscaster on the radio instead of watching the game. As we get closer to the end, I just want to savor it!

#by posting this I am also forcing myself to stick to my words #byyyyeeeee!! #bnha manga leaks #bnha manga spoilers #bnha 414 #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #lin speaks

[cato616]

PREDICTABLE FEELING (part three)

kendall roy x fem! reader

I'm planning to write another succession fic so yeyy im excited; it's more general, kendall, roman and shiv. So probably there will be something about it these week I hope.

note: I tried to make this ep the smutty one but I got carried away for something else,, so sorry you will have to wait for the next one I think 💀

summary: kendall suggested you should stay for the night after the party, but for that you'd have to tolerate the event before it's finished, and perhaps that could take a bad turn

parts: pt.1 // pt.2 /// pt.4

content/warning: jealousy again, more alcoholism, emotional angst?

I'll see you later ken

You thought. Kept you excited, you are a pretty anxious person, can't wait all night to be alone with him again, but unfortunately you would have to play alone for today, pretending to hear what your co-workers been doing while having your mind elsewhere.

You've been walking around the place, trying to distract yourself, and see if you could spot kendall somewhere. Went from room to room, as you felt he was ignoring you, but you weren't trying to be a stalker, just, wanting to find out what was wrong, and you are an incredible observer to do that.

You finally spotted kendall, right at the corner of the bar, pretty well hidden you could say. However you noticed he was talking with just the one. you gotta be kidding me. His ex was having a fun conversation with the man, as it appeared; lots of smiling here and then, grinning ear to ear, you didn't have to be a pro at observing corporal language to understand that they were flirting. You felt a little disappointed, his ego was bigger than you thought, he must've feel so great when successfully seduced the desperate assistant, to then going after the ex, and feel like the greatest man in the world; you were not having that.

As you were watching them, kendall eyes glimpsed at your presence in the distance, staring at him from a far. You immediately looked the other way, it wasn't intentional, to make yourself look like lurker, you didn't want to him to catch you like that, the rejected lover, who didn't even get to base one with the man, so damn ridiculous. You got out of the room quickly as you could, and decided to leave the flat to then leave to yours.

In kendall's perspective, when he caught you looking, he knew he was kind of busted, and as soon as you started to leave the room, seeming a little heartbroken, he tried to chase you down, but unfortunately he lost you, since you were already gone. He could've follow you down, but he gave up, feeling so stupid for his own actions. Felt he had it all under control.

He was beat, didn't feel all the party vibes at the moment, so he went straight to his bed, feeling a little broken. Roman caught him going away, in a way that feels suspicious. "wow, the party man it's leaving his own party, what you have there? some fresh lines waiting for you?" As always roman being so charming. "just- just leave it man okay? not today." Kendall was done with himself he couldn't keep hearing roman's daily teasing. "woah, um you okay bro? I mean I don't wanna get into it all but-." Ken chuckles mid conversation. "yeah, of course you don't." he lays down on his bed, and put his hand over his front head, as he would have q terrible headache. "I messed up, rome." As he exhales out of exhaustion and confesses. "you fucking it up? not a surprise honestly." Kendall continued not caring a bit what roman's being saying, as he's used of it. "You warned me, I suppose, and I didn't listen." Roman stayed put, deciphering what could be kendall talking about, and then it hit him. "oh my god, her?" Fully surprised by the situation but overly amused by his confession, kendall nodded to his question. Roman starts laughing. "I gotta tell someone, shiv! she's gonna love this-" Shiv magically appears right after roman talked about her. "uuh, what's going on? I saw you and roman coming in here, what happened?" Shiv sees both kendall, looking like a sad puppy, and roman, who was about to burst with laughter. "guess who was gonna get bent over today by the world champion here?" Roman was so excited to let shiv know the most humiliating news for kendall. "roman I don't wanna know what kendall's up to, sincerely, but... her? your...?" intending to be you. Ken again nodded. "yeah... (sighs) you're correct." Shiv put her hand over her mouth, to contain any loud laughter that could come out of her to try to be civilized about this. "oh, ken..." slightly chuckles but instantly it wears off. "it hasn't been a day yet... and you already fucked it?" Shiv still seemed a little unserious, but the question was genuine. "what happened?" Shiv calmly asks, as she gently sits down on the bed, next to kendall; Kendall does the same and lifted his way up, to have him now sitting next to shiv. Roman rolled his eyes, the warm heart to heart moments weren't his style, but he kept quiet, and sat down too, on the other side of the bed. Then kendall started to tell about it. "I promised, well, kind of... to meet up with her, later on, but I got distracted with..." Kendall pauses but shiv understood it. "oh her?" Talking about kendall's ex in an obvious matter. "yeah, she's here too... and it was wrong, I betrayed someone, once more." Ken closes his eyes, feeling remorseful, and shiv tries to cheer him up after having eye contact with roman, both seeing kendall, feeling worried. "now dude, I know she's very shy and stuff, but we're adults, and shit can happen, you couldn't help it ken..." Kendall turn his head to shiv slowly. "when you're an adult it doesn't mean you can't be a good and decent person, shiv, but maybe you didn't know that." Shiv attitude changes right after kendall's attack after her. "woah, okay, first of all, you can't come up me like that-" both of them start fighting each other, on voice on top of the other, while roman was watching the whole thing, on silence but annoyed by it all. "okay, okay! you guys..." kendall and shiv looked straight at roman. "you starting to sound just like mommy and daddy." Roman starts fake crying and then stopped his teasing to have his middle finger shown to them, as usual. "bye bye, you morons." Roman closed the door and leaves kendall and shiv still together. Shiv tries to focus back on, looks at ken, seeming hot-tempered. "if you think... that the girl is going to be a liability, then she shouldn't be working for us any longer." She walks away from the bedroom and leaves. Kendall is now alone again, with his thoughts.

As for you, just have arrived to your place, not trying to think about all that mess from earlier, you were alone as well with your thoughts, thinking how any of this was a good idea, playing around like this with your job on the line, yes, it does pay really well, but if something like this was already troubling your mental health, perhaps it's not really that worth it. You were decided, you took out your phone, but then stopped for a second, started to reflect, maybe you were making a decision too quickly out of just jealousy, that you'll probably regret after. You tried to calm yourself, breathe in and out, everything will be fine, and you will need to keep kendall out of your mind and start looking somewhere else-

Your phone starts buzzing, and who could it be, it's Kendall luckily. You were just reflecting about your life because of Kendall and then starts calling you out of nowhere just when you had your phone on your hands. are there cameras here? You started to get paranoid just a tiny bit. You determinedly hit the answer button, ready to have a conversation. "hello Kendall." pretty unbothered. "oh hey... I think we need to-" You didn't give him a chance to even start it. "this is how it's gonna go, I stay as your assistant, or even someone elses? roman, tom, anyone... but that's all I'll ever be here, I won't be a little toy for you to play around, and for so long..." You feel like starting to break a little. "we've been friends for so many years, and you treat me like this... I should be quitting actually, but I won't have it... now that I think about it, you really are deserving of your name, kendall roy." You hear nothing but his silence on the other side, but hoping actually he would say something, however you knew he wouldn't, and let you be more infuriated by it. "tomorrow, ill be back, and everything will be back to normal, but you get to be the kendall roy you were always meant to be.

Right after you hung up, you thought that maybe you went a little too far; if they decide to fire you, it's probably for the better, but if not, you get on with your life, doing what you always have been doing, being an assistant.

After hunging up on Kendall, he was nothing but devastated, couldn't believe he can't even hold onto someone he cares about on just day one. He was believing that everything he does, touch, etc. tends to fail for him. Flirting with his ex, was a mistake, and in vain, she wouldn't get back with him, ever. He was fighting loneliness at the moment, but you, you were used to it, you had yourself and you thought that was enough; on the contrary, kendall was just getting started, couldn't bare the fact he was that close on having you later that night, since he can't keep it in his pants, ruined it.

He went straight to bed, party was over, but you didn't want to sleep just yet, there was something else you needed to do first. You grabbed your phone and started writing.

Sorry to bother you Mr roy, but I wanted to discuss something with you, maybe about a transfer. I'll be glad if you get to answer this, if not, I'll be there trying to contact you more often to get this matter to your attention. I'll be patiently waiting for your reply. Thank you.

Good night, roman.

You sent the e-mail, and went to sleep right after it. You thought you'd be sleeping horribly, not only because of the whole Kendall thing, but also thinking about working for roman would leave you apprehensive, but turns out, you're sleeping like an angel.

Roman was heading to his place after the party. He was sitting at the back of the range rover, when suddenly his phone buzzed. "g-mail? who the fuck sends e-mails nowadays?... and who is-..." Roman's eyes opened wide when he read the username and as he started to read the mail as well. "holy shit, oh my god, Kendall is going to absolutely love this, fuck yeah." Roman wasted no time and got to it, wrote you back very quickly. He was more than happy with your decision, as he put back his phone back in his pocket, and kept on smiling. "tomorrow will be a fucking interesting day"

and it will be.

continue.

#kendall roy #kendall roy x reader #kendall roy x you #kendall succession #succession #roman roy #roman roy succession #shiv roy #roman succession #kendall roy succession #fem reader #y/n #part three

[tojisun]

hiii my love!! am a long time lurker first time messager hehe can I just say your writing is so beautiful and gorgeous and stunning and amazing and lovely like yourself. the way biker!simon and bimbo!reader is written is like a dreaaaammmmm. I giggle and sigh and my bf looks like at like ???? but I never say anything cause it's my lil guilty pleasure.

anyway what prompted me to finally message you is the little writers block erin fic (I SCREAMED I SHOUT AND LET IT ALL OUT IALDJSKDJS RAWRRRRR) and it reminded me of a time when I was in readers position and seeing the man I loved start to fall for someone else ))): the angst the stress the sadness (in hindsight he was not worth it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RAWWWWWR) and it just took me back to the times I was feeling that and you captured everything so perfectly ))):

I will never forgot those times but since then I have found my own man who never made me doubt his love for me and treats me how I've always wanted to be treated. like he wasn't even who I thought I'd end up with and he turns out to be the one for me?????? crazyyyyyyy sorry am ranting but just wanted to say you're a beautiful human bean and I love u and ur right lots and even if reader goes through it (like dvf!simon RAWWWWWWWR) i will power through it and read it and cry and laugh and fall in love mwah mwah

HII OMG!!! this made me hysterically sob im actually losing my mind HAKCJKEN

thank you so so so much!! you are too kind to me 🥹🫶🏼 im super duper glad that u are enjoying my works <33!! biker!simon and bimbo!reader are two of my favourite projects rn bc its so refreshing to write them; they tend to protray simon as ooc :(( but i cant help it, i want him to pamper me sm

thank you so much for liking the WIP fic!! tbh i wrote it after having reread mssges between me and my ex partner, and i was struck w so much sadness and longing that it made me tippy tappy on my phone😴

(i fear the ways in which i make art for those who’ve hurt me. read: how we break and, now, passenger)

im so sorry that you have been in that spot :(( to see your partner slowly falling out of love for you? god that mustve been so painful. im so glad that you are happier now, and that you’ve found someone who loves you just as strongly!!! someone who you are gonna spend your future with!!!! smooch u so much baby bc im just so happy for u teehee <33

AWWW thank you so so much!! i feel like a teddy stuffed with fluffy cotton w the way this ask made me feel so happy <33 thank you kindly for supporting me and my works 🥺🩷 take care my sweetpea and love u lots!!

(and omg pls dont apologize for the ask. u have made me so so happy, and for that, thank you so much again <33)

#anon #ask #sweetest sweetheart #what did i ever do to deserve such kindness n love #thank you kindly my love <3

[egg-emperor]

Hey there! Lurker on your blog. I have to say I agree with your takes. I don't know where people get the idea that Eggman is becoming good. That's never going to change. We wouldn't even have a main villain otherwise! It's much more interesting to see Sage go down a path of villainy and imitating her father like most young kids do with their parents. I love those artworks of them being evil together. It'd be so fun if we got a game where Sage dresses to match her dad more and even attempts to laugh like he does!

It's good to know I'm not alone. 💜 I feel like I'm in this little spot with a very small number of people that don't agree with all loudest sides of the debates right now because I don't believe it's even happening to complain about in the first place. Eggman definitely isn't ever going to become a good guy. I don't know what the fandom is talking about, he's so far morally gray and is still very much evil.

He's the main villain of the series and always will be, he's one of the most iconic ever and they're not gonna make him a good guy and lose that status and replace him with some random guy lol. Sega JP emphasized how he's a bad guy and cool villain the day the update dropped through Sonic channel. All official stuff is still describing and showing him to be very much so.

Since accepting and analyzing Frontiers Eggman much deeper down to every line of dialogue, I realized it's just brought forward a bunch of even more evidence I can use and emphasizes how much of an evil bastard and bad person he in cool new ways that encourage deeper thought. It's been very cool and fun to me to dive in deep as someone insanely fixated on analyzing him XD

And it's also still surface level with the way he was still constantly plotting, scheming, wished he could use what he's learned about the ancients and the end to his advantage, showed low empathy multiple times, laughed at Sonic's death, and made it very clear how much he hates working with Sonic and co. And on top of all that, his dynamic with Sage is based on his narcissism and egotism.

This also didn't change at all in The Final Horizon, it also showed it in even more cool ways and it's great. Sure the fandom created their own vastly different fanon version of Eggman and his dynamic with Sage and talk like it's canon and let it overshadow all the real cool and interesting things about it, but the official media is unaffected. Eggman is the same character I know and love as ever there.

When I shut out what the loudest parts of fandom are telling me to think and feel, I genuinely like what I see and analyze Eggman's characterization to be. I see what they were going for even without Flynn's later writer commentary. And I'm really happy I genuinely like it, I feel happy, content, and at peace with how he's being portrayed and it's relieved me of so much stress and worry.

He's not going anywhere, he's the same diabolical narcissistic egotistical bastard that I adore and find so funny and entertaining! And the new stuff taking him in interesting new directions that emphasize the character he already is and not changing it but further strengthening and solidifying it instead, makes me so happy and appreciate and understand it in even more ways.

That's my funny horrible special guy and I love him so much 🥰

And Sage is still very much not a good person either, knowing all about how terrible Eggman is and still remaining loyal and loving. That combined with his narcissism and ego - the reasons he praises and takes pride in her for the first place - is a delightfully dangerous combination. Just think about how his massive ego and evil could be even further boosted and enabled by her!

And the influence Eggman can have on Sage will also be very fun in return. She's compliant with his orders and knows exactly who he is, what he wants, what he's capable of, and how terrible he is and sticks by him. I'd love to see more of villainous Sage and how Eggman's influence can affect her that way, like seeing even more of the pre Sonic influence Sage will be very fun.

Final Horizon gave us a nice example of how she supports him conquering the world and I'd love to see more of her attitude and feelings on it and what she's willing to do to play her part in it. I also really enjoy art that gets it right and shows Eggman and Sage being evil and reveling in it together. I'm excited to see more because their canon dynamic is fun and has potential to be excitingly chaotic!

Sage trying to mimic aspects of Eggman like behaviors, quirks, and maybe fashion would be pretty funny. I think he'd allow it to an extent, as he'll enjoy how it shows her admiration for him, helps remind people Eggman is her father more which it's easier for him to take pride, and he'll just be very pleased to influence someone in an evil way... so long as it doesn't steal any of his spotlight! XD

#dr eggman #eggman #dr robotnik #dr. eggman #asks #sonic frontiers #sage the ai #sage robotnik #sage sonic #eggdad #my post

[ask-serendipity-sky]

Just a few thoughts after reading some last asks you got Sky. Personally I never agreed with the theory that Jikook were laying low this past year for MS. I just think they were busy and with chapter 2 we just did not see much of them and that’s it. No need for theories. What Jikook bloggers say on their blog isn’t gospel truth. People are free to make their own mind. So many people seem yo follow blindly what the popular bloggers say and go along with their theories. Because they want to be reassured and have an answer for everything I guess? I think we should just accept we just can’t, have an answer for everything. All those years I haven’t changed my mind about Jikook, I still think they’re in a long term committed relationship but I have accepted that not everything about them makes sense, there’s some mystery and small contradictions we just can’t resolve now and it’s okay. I prefer to look at the bigger picture rather than to focus on details or try to explain everything away. And not agreeing with many Jikookers theories doesn’t mean Jikook aren’t real, it just means they’re shippers at the end of the day so they have to entertain a specific narrative. And we could all be wrong and misread Jikook’s bond for love when it’s not, who knows. But I find it a bit ironic that now than it’s clearer than ever that Jikook are extremely close (applying for the companion ship program for MS? seriously Tkkers and Jikook antis can pack their bags now!) some people have to resolve to "but Jikookers were saying this" — nah, many might have been saying this but many of us are just lurkers here and we have our own mind and thinking. Still doesn’t change the reality about Jikook. I

That being said I think now would be more than time for the fandom at large to finally recognize how close Jikook are and stop with the usual narrative and the ignorance. I have a feeling Jikook are going to be even more obvious after MS (not saying they’ll come out let’s be realistic), it’d be better to admit and celebrate their bond if they don’t want to look like the biggest fool later on…

Hi anon,

Yes, that's completely true.

People that don't believe in jikook will always make fun of the theories not realizing that they have their own theories. And a theory, in this case, is trying to make sense of situations.

Obviously, some theories are out there and completely lose the plot of what it means to be acknowledging 2 real humans and their relationship. It would be nice to have more bloggers who are rational and bring a different perspective to jikook tumblr.

I agree with you and think that jikook will be loud after ms. It will be nice to know that they can be freer. Not for us but for them. Hopefully people can acknowledge that.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

[fandomscraziness22]

aloe and candytuft for locklyle!

aloe (affection, also grief) — “i miss them so much.” candytuft (indifference) — “i said that i didn’t care, but i lied.”

Lockwood knows he should tell George and Lucy why dragging his body out of bed feels like the world’s largest hurdle he must jump over. Why today is a bad day, even though the sun is shining and they have a full day of research and scouting for a larger case planned and a smaller haunting to deal with tonight. Why Lockwood wakes with a pit in his stomach and his limbs immovable as if he’s been ghost-touched.

But he doesn’t. Because he’s Lockwood, and he needs to put on his most charming face for the guards at the mansion Lucy and him are to check out today, and it’s been so long, he should be over this by now. The grief will never leave him, he knows this, but it’s been years upon years since his parents died, and the day itself shouldn’t feel any different.

It does, and when Lockwood heaves himself out of bed, the heaviness sinks deep into his bones, into his soul. 

And then the day goes poorly, because Anthony bloody Lockwood can never catch a break.

They’re out of toast in the morning, so Lockwood has to deal with a smaller breakfast than normal. George is yammering away about what he hopes to find at the archives today, and his voice, normally a soothing background, grates at Lockwood’s nerves. Lucy sends him many concerned glances, but he waves her away.

Then the mansion is much bigger than either he or Lucy was prepared for, and they spend all day walking around and comparing notes. His feet hurt and he notices there are too many possible hiding spaces for a source, which means that when they come back to clear the ghost in a few days, they will be in for a long night.

They’re late to their case that night, by no fault of their own. George is already there (hopefully), but Lucy and Lockwood’s night taxi gets a flat tire, and it takes an extra half an hour for another one to come along and give them a ride.

Lockwood keeps shoving down his anger and his grief, which he knows is dangerous to take with him into this garden, where they have been contracted for a low-level type one shade. Lucy has already tried to ask three times what’s wrong with him, and he hates himself for his short tone, but he just can’t explain. There’s no time now, so when she attempts to ask before they enter the garden, Lockwood explodes. 

“Give it a rest, Lucy! We’re all running around busy as hell, I don’t need you mothering me.”

Her guard is up at once, though she’s never one to back down from a fight. “God, Lockwood, excuse me for caring! I just thought—”

But he cuts her off. “I don't care what you thought, Lucy. If I say I’m fine, then leave it at that and let me do my work.”

Lucy scoffs. “It’s our bloody work, Lockwood. I’m just as much a part of the agency as you are.”

“I know that,” Lockwood says as he rubs his tired eyes. “Look, can we please just go find George and finish the job?” 

She huffs by him without another word, and damn it, Lockwood is going to have to do some groveling tomorrow.

Of course it’s not a simple shade, but instead a whole cluster of shades and lurkers. Thankfully they make it out relatively unscathed, but all three Lockwood and Co. operatives return home tired and sore.

Lockwood just wants to go to bed, though he knows by the cold shoulder Lucy is giving him that he should go apologize. But he can’t summon up the courage or the strength to do so. He falls into bed and lets the black cloud of grief that’s been hovering all day finally smother him.

It’s three in the morning when Lockwood startles awake. Another nightmare; this time his parents and Jessica are ghosts intent on killing Lucy, and Lockwood can do nothing but stand and watch. He shakes his head to try and clear the dream, and gets up to make himself some tea.

Lockwood’s settled in the library when a creak on the stairs warns him of Lucy’s presence. She hesitantly enters and sits down next to him, her own cup of tea in her hands. Which means that she purposely alerted him that she was there. 

Lucy’s guarded once more, and while the grief is still present within himself, it’s hollow and dulled, back to a somewhat normal level. And Lockwood can never stand to have Lucy mad at him, so he begins slowly.

“You know when I said I didn’t care what you thought about me? That was a lie.”

“You don’t say,” Lucy muses. She’s never been one to give him the easy way out. It’s something he likes about her—she doesn’t take shit from anyone, including him and George.

So Lockwood takes a breath and whispers, “Yesterday was the anniversary of my parents’ death.”

Lucy’s demeanor changes instantly. “Lockwood,” she breathes, reaching over to hold his hand. 

“I know it doesn’t excuse my being a dick to you,” he says. “But it’s a hard day. I just miss them so much sometimes it’s like a punch to the gut every single second. I shouldn’t have taken my pain out on you. I’m sorry.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” She’s rubbing her thumb along his hand now, the soothing gesture a familiar one.

He shakes his head. “I just normally try to grit my teeth and get through the day. No sense in dragging you down with me.”

Now she’s the one shaking her head. “Me and George could have handled that cluster, and our scouting today could have been pushed off a few days. You don’t need to suffer alone, Lockwood. You have us. You have me.”

Lockwood gives her a half smile as her words sink in. Sometimes he can be a bit thick, he knows, when it comes to letting his friends in. But Lucy seems insistent on staying, and she’s here now, when it counts. 

“Thanks, Luce.” Simple but effective; very different from the normal Lockwood flair, but he can’t help but enjoy the simplicity in this moment.

send me flower prompts!

#lockwood and co #locklyle #l&co #anthony lockwood #lucy carlyle #angst #woops of course it is

[befuddledcinnamonroll]

Long time lurker here, first time poster. I’ve been so enjoying the beautiful analysis people provide around bl content, especially lately around shows like La Pluie. And I love the perspectives on today’s episode, but I also feel like there’s a take I haven’t seen on Tai’s perspective. And this has really been sticking in my mind, because I resonated so hard with Tai in this episode (which I’m sure says a lot about me, heh). So although I totally agree with the posts pointing out Tai’s mistakes (the lying was a dumb thing to do) and why Patts got so frustrated, I also really feel like I understand Tai here.

And of course disclaimer that this is all subjective, and we all see things through our own lens, etc, etc.

For one - Tai has made it clear from the beginning with Patts that the soulmate bond makes him uncomfortable and causes him a lot of doubt. And Patts has reassured him time and time again that the soulmate bond is not the most important thing, that he would pick Tai regardless, that it’s really just about their love. But when Patts does finally lose his temper? It’s the soulmate bond he keeps hitting on. Not “you are my boyfriend and committed to me”, not “you lied to me and that’s a huge problem”. He brings up the lying, yes, but it’s the soulmate bond he keeps repeatedly referencing. I’m sure Patts meant it in the moment when he said he would love Tai without it, but in this moment, it becomes clear that he does indeed see the bond as important. To the extent that he is absolutely terrified when it disappears, and shows his lack of faith in their love alone.

Second, Patts asking Tai to choose him. My heart sunk when he said that. I know a lot of people are of the thought that Tai should just say the words. So why is that such a big deal?

Because I think Tai has chosen. He has chosen repeatedly, and in his mind, clearly. He worked through his fears, he told Patts he loves him, he happily agreed to be his boyfriend, and most importantly, made the decision to be intimate with him in a way he has never been with another person. I don’t know if Tai is demisexual, but he seems to lean that way in his attitude towards sex and love more so than Patts, who was ready to get down on their first date.

So when Patts asks him to choose, acts like this soulmate bond with Lomfon is a genuine threat to their love and commitment as boyfriends, acts like their love-making is irrelevant, acts like Lomfon must have just as much of a hold on Tai’s heart as Patts does purely because of something Tai has never had faith in, I can absolutely see why it broke Tai’s heart.

#la pluie #la pluie the series #trust bl to be the thing to finally get me to post