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#no not salt. sodium.
tj-crochets · 1 month
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Okay I have had enough salt to be probably medically inadvisable for people without my particular health issues and am feeling moderately better*! I also have another question: How do you choose a mattress when you are buying one? I think I've only ever had hand-me-down mattresses from my siblings or mattresses my parents bought when I was little (idk, I just know I was uninvolved in the obtaining), and I am thinking a new mattress might help my Slept Wrong Injuries be at least less bad, if not stop them entirely, but idk how to choose one. My dad said I'd know when I laid on the mattress but my current mattress doesn't feel bad, but clearly is? So idk that I'll be able to tell *back to my usual "muscle issue flareup" level instead of "maybe it's worth seeing how bad muscle relaxers make my blood pressure" level lol
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salted15 · 1 year
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he was put on babysitting duty
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time-woods · 1 year
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based off of a real event- i uh- dont know if i should explain.. lets just say, there might be mass amounts of salt in my carpet and bed...
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arctic-hands · 3 months
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For real tho health freaks who scream about how sugar and salt will kill us all and try to push for restrictions on things like candy and chips for SNAP recipients or politicians who try from time to time to replace food stamps all together and give out Government Approved Staples like bread and peanut butter and Government Cheese are gonna kill a whole lotta sick and disabled people like
Diabetics
POTS sufferers
Hypotensives
People with peanut allergies
People with celiac disease or wheat allergies
The lactose intolerant
People who can't eat solid food
People who are undernourished for any reason and need all the calories they can pack on
So-called "picky eaters" who can't tolerate certain tastes and textures without getting violently ill
A myriad of other human conditions that cannot be neatly tallied into categories because the human body and human experience is vast and infinitely variable
But I don't think ableds really care about us and our health like they like to claim so they can harass us about it, do you?
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secondwheel · 5 months
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Na + Cl -> NaCl (sodium chloride aka table salt)
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dailywonpil · 4 months
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chicago-geniza · 29 days
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Made spicy silken tofu soup and added a ton of potassium salt because a friend informed me that excessive albuterol use can make your blood potassium levels plummet and I've been having worse muscle spasms and arrhythmias than usual 💀💀💀
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Juleka vs. the Forces of the Universe ch 15
Juleka vs. the Forces of Chat Noir 
Juleka vs. the Forces of the Universe (AO3) 
Hi everyone!!!
I wanted to start out by thanking you all so much for your patience and ongoing support. 💖💖💖💖 I honestly thought I would get this chapter posted ages ago because it was 90% written before I started my spring semester. But then, (to absolutely no one's surprise) I ended up being very ambitious with the central project of my entire semester. That ate up pretty much all of my time and mental energy, which was why this ended up getting so delayed. But, I am now finished the semester on Friday and I spent yesterday finishing writing, and today revising. And now, here it is!!!
This chapter has been a long time coming (parts of it have been written for over a year 😂) and I'm so excited to finally share it with all of you. It ended up being way longer than expected, so make sure to settle in because it is a very long one.
A last bit of housekeeping. My eternal love and thanks to the my LBSC friends for cheering me on. Also a bug thanks to Min and Rierse for helping me remember what happened with some of the canon akumas and saving me from having to rewatch episodes. Finally, a huge thank you to Ver for talking me through all of my spirals and self-doubt I had with this chapter. Y'all are the best and I love you 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
With all that being said, again, thank you for your patience and I hope you enjoy the chapter!!! 💖💖💖💖💖
_______________________________________________________________________
The air was warm, but there was a soft, cool breeze slipping through the city, ruffling her hair and carrying with it the sounds of the city at night. The sun had just dipped below the horizon, and the warm light of the golden hour had been replaced by the dusky blues and violets of twilight. In the approaching darkness, the skyline twinkled with the lights of the city, now come to life. It was a gorgeous evening. A perfect June evening. Except… 
Where was he? 
When Ladybug had shown up on the Liberty, it hadn’t come as a complete shock—though she hadn’t been expecting her quite so soon— what with her and Marinette’s little talk in the shoe store. Honestly, she had been flattered when she had realized Ladybug had been thinking about entrusting her with more responsibilities. And she was only too happy to fill in for Ladybug for patrol for the next couple of weeks. She was just glad Marinette was taking the time to work on something for herself. And patrolling with Chat Noir would be… fine. 
Probably. 
Maybe. 
Hopefully…
And where was he anyway? 
He was fifteen minutes late now and she couldn’t exactly start patrol without him. Well, she probably shouldn’t start without him, given this was her first patrol. But if he wasn’t there in another five minutes, she was going to start without him anyway. She wasn’t about to let Ladybug down. Not when she had come to her for help. 
And not when she had looked so relieved when she had agreed to the favour. 
She leaned back on her hands and looked up at the sky, painted with the promise of the oncoming night. The breeze ruffled her hair again, and she sighed.  
She could definitely get used to evenings like this. 
It was such gorgeous evening, she could just sit forever. But she had a job to do. And if relaxing on a rooftop on an evening like this was this wonderful, racing across the rooftops had to be even better… 
She was just pushing herself to her feet when the soft thud of boots hitting the roof flicked at her ears. As she rose fully to her feet she turned to find Chat standing behind her, staring at her. 
“Oh. It’s you,” he said flatly. 
“Excuse me?”  
Instead of answering, her tapped on his baton and a section of it slid open to reveal his communicator. He started tapping on the screen; she watched as his eyes scanned back and forth as if he were reading something. “I thought she was trying to make a joke,” he mumbled, a frown creasing his face.
“About…?” 
He didn’t look up from his communicator. “About her calling in someone else to patrol.” 
“And why would she joke about that?” she asked, crossing her arms as she watched him type out what she assumed was a message to Ladybug. 
Finally, he looked up from his screen to meet her eyes. “Because it’s our thing.” He had left the word ‘just’ unsaid, but it was plenty clear in his voice. 
“Well, I’m standing in for her,” she said tartly. He hadn’t even been here five minutes and already, her patience was waning thin. Maybe she should have just started patrol without him…  
“You can go home,” he said brusquely, “I can easily handle patrol myself,” he grumbled. “I don’t need your help.” 
“I’m here, like she asked me to be” she snapped. “Now come on, we’re already starting late enough as it is.” 
Petty? Yes. 
Did she care? No. 
Chat shot her a sour look, and then without waiting, he launched himself into the air and toward the next roof over with his baton. 
But it didn’t matter. 
She would have no problem keeping up. 
                                                               ***
The night air whipped at her face as she raced across the rooftops and sailed through the air. Her feet barely touched the shingles as she tore across the rooftops. And she swore she flew just a little bit higher with every leap into the air. The speed with which they were racing was… exhilarating. 
Even if it was so plainly obvious that he was trying to show her up. Or leave her behind. 
Knowing him… it was probably both. 
He glanced over his shoulder at her, his mouth settling into a tight line at the sight of her keeping pace with him. As soon as he landed, he used his baton to launch himself into the air in an attempt to pull ahead. 
Like it was some sort of race. 
But she wasn’t about to give him the satisfaction. 
And if he wanted to play stupid games? 
She pulled her bolas from her waist and spun them, not missing a single step as she whipped them out to latch onto some scaffolding ahead of Chat. The air whistled past her as she swung through the air, pulling ahead of Chat. 
He would have to live with winning stupid prizes. 
                                                          ***
Ladybug was already waiting for her in amongst the pile of stuff in the shadows of the stage’s scaffolding by the time she made it home from patrol. She dropped down onto the deck and ducked into the cover of the chaos of the the junk her ma refused to part with. 
“How did it go?” Ladybug asked in a low voice. 
“Good,” she murmured as she dropped her transformation. It had been good. Other than all the business with Chat…
Ladybug must has seen her thoughts reflected in her face, because her brows furrowed and her eyes were suddenly glimmering with concern. “If you don’t have the time, or if it’s stressing you out you don’t have to-“
“It really was fine,” she promised, grasping Ladybug’s hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze as she haded her the panjas bracelet. “Chat just… he wasn’t thrilled I was the one he was patrolling with.” 
Something akin to the beginning of a grimace crossed Ladybug’s face. “I’m sorry about him. I told him… but I guess I should have given him more warning or something.” 
“You told him. That should have been enough.” 
“Yeah, well…” Ladybug said noncommittally. “Other than that, things were ok?” 
“More than ok. It was actually pretty nice. Good way to blow off some steam.” 
Ladybug laughed quietly, nodding her head. “Yeah, it is.” The laughter faded from her face, replaced by hesitancy. “I know I asked you to cover my patrols with Chat for me, but I was wondering… would you- would you be comfortable covering my solo patrols as well? It’s just, I- I’m working on a really tight deadline with this project and it’s really important to me,” she explained, her words tumbling out in an ever increasing tempo as she wrung her hands. “The first one isn’t until the end of the week so you would have some time to adjust. And if you needed anything I would just be a message away! My kwami can received messages even when I’m not transformed so if there were any issues or you felt overwhelmed I could-“
“It’s no problem.”
Ladybug’s whole body heaved with her sigh of relief. “Thank you, Juleka. You have no idea what this means to me.” Oh, she had a pretty good idea… “And I’m sorry to ask you in the first place. I would just get Chat to do solo patrols until I’m done but-“ Ladybug hesitated, obviously debating with herself. But then she sighed again. “I would feel better if I had someone I trust patrolling with him…”  
“I won’t let you down.” 
Ladybug’s eyes darted down to the panjas bracelet before returning to meet her own, a smile curling across her face. “I know.” 
                                                            ***
Chat was already waiting on the rooftop by the time she got there. He was perched on the edge of the roof, one leg dangling over the edge of the roof, with the other propped up so his hand could rest easily on his knee. He was leaning back on his other hand, and his face was tilted towards the sky so that his features perfectly caught the last of the golden rays. 
He was the picture of casual elegance and charm. 
Easy. 
Effortless. 
And totally practiced. 
She recognized the pose from one of the ads that had been plastered across the city a while back. 
After the her first few outings as Purple Tigress, she had gotten the hang of landing silently, no matter the force with which she had jumped or fallen. But she let herself land with a soft, but still audible thud. 
“M’lady-“ he began so say as he turned, his face already breaking into a suave smile before his gaze landed on her. His smile immediately fell. “Oh. It’s you again.” 
“It’s me again,” she agreed as she made her way towards him. But he ignored her in favour of turning back to look over the city as he pulled up the communicator in his baton. He began typing furiously, and a second later, she heard the familiar sound of an outgoing message. Followed by another. And another. 
“So…” she said slowly, drawing the word out, “are we going to patrol or…” 
“I’m waiting for Ladybug.” 
“She isn’t coming,” she sighed as she pinched the bridge of her nose. “That’s why I’m here, remember?” 
“That was last time,” he said, still typing on his communicator. And still pointedly not looking at her. 
“And this time. And all her patrols for the next couple of weeks.”
Another chime of an outgoing message rang from his phone, and his fingers stilled over the communicator. Then he snapped it shut and stowed it on his belt before standing. Finally, he turned to look at her with pursed lips and an exaggerated sigh. “Look, you’re a temp,” she raised her brow, and crossed her arms for good measure, but he continued on, completely undeterred. “And you’re still pretty new at all of this. But there’s something you need to understand.” 
“And that is?” 
“Ladybug and I… we’re in this together.” 
“And now I’m in it too.” 
“No,” he said, a hint of laughter in his voice. Like he was correcting a silly thing a child had said. “She and I are in this together. It’s been us from the start. And no offence, but you’re no replacement for her.” 
“Well, it’s a good thing I’m not trying to replace her. I’m just filling in for a bit.” He looked like he had more he wanted to say. Before he could begin to say anything else,  she turned, glancing back over her shoulder as she loosened her bolas from her waist. “Now are we going to patrol, or what?’ Without waiting for a response, she snapped her bolas and swung herself into the air.  
                                                             ***
The wind whipped through her hair as she flew across the rooftops. They were going so fast, her feet barely touched the ground. It seemed Chat still had a point to prove. 
Though what he was hoping to accomplish—what he was thinking he would accomplish if he proved his point—was frankly, beyond her. Did he actually think she would stop showing up for patrol? 
Her bolas cracked like a whip, the sound cutting through to city noise as she latched onto a chimney and swung herself to land on the next roof. 
“You know,” Chat grunted as he landed on the roof a step behind her, “I can handle this on my own.” 
It was a funny thing for him to say, given he had been petulant about Ladybug not being there in the first place. “Like I said,” she said as she vaulted over a retaining wall, “Ladybug asked me to fill in.” 
“You could go home early.” 
“I’m not going to go back on a promise.” It took her a few seconds to realize Chat wasn’t running beside—behind—her anymore. She slid to a stop and turned to look back at him. He was standing a few feet back, frowning at her with his arms crossed. “Why did she need you to cover for her anyway?” 
“Didn’t she tell you?” 
“She said she had something she needed to work on, but she wouldn’t tell me what.” 
“There’s your answer then,” she sighed. 
That, apparently, was the wrong thing to say. 
“And why did she ask you to fill in for her?” he demanded, crossing his arms even tighter across his chest as he stalked a few steps toward her. 
She couldn’t exactly tell him Ladybug had asked her to cover for her because she—as a civilian—had encouraged Ladybug—also as a civilian—to take time to do something for herself. Like make herself a nice dress for the dance she was going to with the guy she liked… 
“I guess the same reason she’s asked me to help out in battles,” she said, feigning blithe ignorance and biting down hard on her sharper words. She was already getting a headache from his petulance, and she wasn’t in the mood to pick a fight. 
Finishing one on the other hand… 
“We don’t need you for patrols,” he said acidly. The ‘for patrols’ sentiment sounded like an afterthought. “Ladybug and I are perfectly capable-“ 
“She’s busy.” 
“Well, I’m fully capable of handling it on my own. We never asked the other part-timers to help out with them.” 
She shrugged. “Well, Ladybug asked me to. Now are we going to continue?” 
Chat said nothing, but he sniffed as he brushed past her to continue along the roof. She bit back a sigh, but indulged in rolling her eyes as she turned to follow him. 
                                                             ***
The bright, late-morning sun filtered through the porthole into her room, filling the room with warm light from the way it reflected off of her dressing table mirror. Which was directing the light right into her eyes. 
Squinting with disgust, she burrowed back into the somewhat dark depths of her sheets to shelter herself from the sun that had no right being so bright this early. Well, early was a relative statement. Couaffaines were not morning people. 
And she especially, was not a morning person on the best of days. 
The late night patrol from the night before—which had resulted in a Chat-induced headache—hadn’t exactly helped. That and… 
In the relative safety of the shadows of her bedding, she frowned at her phone screen 
Alya 🦊?! unsent a message
It wasn’t like Alya to unsend messages. There was the odd occasion where Alya sent a message to the girl’s chat instead of the class—minus Chloe and Sabrina—chat. But that only happened once in a blue moon. And she never bothered to unsend the messages. 
The only reason Alya would unsend a message would be if she didn’t want someone to see it. 
But she had sent it to the Adrienette chat… not the girl squad one… 
 None of the other girls had acknowledged the unsent message, and she hadn’t had a chance to see it before Alya had retracted it. She had been a little busy trying to will the sun to shine somewhere else so she could go back to sleep. 
The little dots indicating Alya was typing again appeared on the screen. She watched as they appeared and disappeared before, after what felt like an eternity, she sent her message. 
Alya 🦊?!: so r we still on for meeting at 11? 
She frowned. 
There was no acknowledgement of the unsent message. No indication of why she had retracted it. 
Nothing. 
It was… weird.
Rose 🌹💗: Yes!! I just have to let my nails dry
Alix 🛼 : gonna be late
Alix 🛼 : still at the park with Kim and Max
Alix 🛼 : Kim actually thinks he can win this race 🙄🙄🙄
Mylène 🌼 : I’m just finishing up some gardening
Mylène 🌼 : I’ll need a quick shower but I’ll be there 
Rose 🌹💗: @Queen of Darkness are you alive yet, bijou?? 
Queen of Darkness 🦇: barely 
Queen of Darkness 🦇: but I’ll be there 
Like she would miss this meeting. 
Rose 🌹💗: 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
Alya 🦊?!: cool
She frowned again as she stared at Alya’s response, which felt entirely too short for a confirmation they would all be attending a scheming session. Alya was being… weird was the only word she could really use to describe it. And it wasn’t just the message that was weird. 
Alya was always a bit weird, especially with all the Adrien stuff looking back on it now. But ever since the shopping trip, she had been especially weird. When she had, as offhandedly and casually as she could, mentioned it to Rose, Rose had simply brushed it off as Alya just being focused on getting Adrien and Marinette together before the school year ended. 
But she couldn’t shake the way Alya had looked to her for agreement in the shoe store, or the look she had given her when Luka had shown up and derailed Alya’s scheme. And then there had been the text… the short, curt, and abrupt text that still had her on edge. 
Alya hadn’t said anything since. And Alya was not afraid of confrontation. It was the little things. The little looks Alya shot her when she thought she wasn’t looking. And now… 
That unsent message was giving her vibes. 
She couldn’t put her finger on it, but it was… it was weird. 
She shook her head. Maybe it was something. But maybe it was nothing. She had been counter-scheming for so long, maybe she was seeing things where there weren’t any? Either way, it was obvious she needed a bit of a break. 
Tapping on her screen, she pulled up her text chat with just Rose.  
Queen of Darkness 🦇: do you want to go our for lunch after the meeting?
Queen of Darkness 🦇: maybe grab some frozen yogurt after and go for a walk in the park?
They were long overdue for a real date. And it would be nice to get off the boat and spend some time with just Rose. And hopefully, it would help her unwind and relax a bit. 
Rose 🌹💗: I already have plans!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Rose 🌹💗: I’m sorry bijou 😭😭😭😭😭😭
She sighed. She had been hoping for a nice day out, but it would have to wait. She started to type out a reply when Rose, in typical fashion, continued her barrage of messages. 
Rose 🌹💗: I would reschedule them if I could but they’re important
Rose 🌹💗: and time sensitive
Rose’s messages made her pause. It wasn’t unusual for Rose to have important plans she couldn’t reschedule. After all, when she was video chatting with Prince Ali, they were at the whims of his often erratic schedule. But Rose always told her if she was chatting with Ali, or what her plans were for that matter. 
Rose wasn’t obligated to tell her what her plans were. And she never expected her to. But Rose always told her. Unprompted too. And Rose knew she didn’t have to, and that she wouldn’t ask if she didn’t offer the reason herself because she wanted to respect Rose’s privacy. 
So it wasn’t a problem that Rose hadn’t said what her plans were. But it was… well, she couldn’t help but feel it was weird. 
Rose 🌹💗: can I take you out tomorrow? 💖💖💖💖💖💖
Queen of Darkness 🦇: of course 💜 and don’t worry about it  💜
She let her phone drop from her hand to bounce against the mattress as she stared up at the ceiling, partially obscured by the sheets she still had shielding her from the light. Maybe she was reading too much into things. After all, people unsent messages. And Rose knew she didn’t have to share every detail of her life. But she just couldn’t ignore that niggling feeling in the back of her head. 
And she doubted she would be able to get rid of it any time soon. 
Before she could dwell on it further, or drag herself from her bed to start getting ready like she probably should have fifteen minutes ago given the time, the sound of footsteps against stairs caught her attention.  
“Morning little miss sunshine,” Luka chuckled as their door squeaked out. 
Groaning, she sat up, her bedding still bundled around her, and gave him the evilest glare she could muster. He was in an entirely too good of a mood considering it was still technically morning. 
He was even humming as he made his way over to his side of the room. And smiling stupidly down at the bags he was carrying…   
Her eyes zeroed in on the shopping bags he was carrying. They were all from thrift stores Marinette had, at this point, dragged everyone to. He had mentioned that he would be looking for something to wear to the dance this weekend. After she had pestered him repeatedly that he couldn’t show up looking like a dork. Well, as much of a dork as he usually looked. 
“So, what did you get?” she asked as she emerged from her bed to take a couple steps across the room. 
“Nothing that will interest you,” he started to say, trailing off as an even dopier grin spread across his face as he glanced down at the contents of his bags. 
Interesting… 
She moved to peer into the closest bag, but with lightning quick reflexes—that would have caught her off guard if she didn’t know he moonlighted as Viperion—he snatched the bag away. “You know I’m going to see what you’re wearing eventually, right?” she grumbled. “It’s my school’s dance, remember?”
“Yeah, well…” Luka mumbled as his face and ears turned a particularly interesting shade of pink. “Don’t forget, we’re moving up dye night because of the dance.”
“Like I would forget,” she said, scoffing at his blatant change in topic. 
“And what happened to you last night?” 
“Hmm?” 
“That miniseries you love, you know, the one  that adapts all those creepy short stories-” 
“Yeah, what about it?” 
“It was on last night, and I was going to tell you but I couldn’t find you.” 
She shrugged. “I was around.” Technically, it was true. Her patrol had ended about the same time the show usually started. But Ladybug had been late picking up the miraculous, which was unsurprising given Marinette’s tendency to get lost in the process when she had a project to work on. And rather than going out for an extra run and making Ladybug wait for her, it had made more sense to just hang around the Liberty. Sure, she had been hiding, but she had been around.
“Doing what?” 
“It was the witching hour, do you really want to know?” With that, she  threw on her robe, and hastily made her way to the kitchen—and some much needed coffee—before Luka could ask any more questions. 
                                                                ***
“Everything go ok tonight?” 
“Yeah. It was nice to stretch my legs.” 
“Great!” Ladybug beamed, her eyes vivid and sparkling. “And you’re all set for tomorrow?” 
She nodded. Tomorrow would be her first solo patrol, and honestly, she was excited for the chance to patrol the city without having to drag along an irritable cat. 
“Ok, then I can meet you at your place at nine-” Ladybug’s words cut off at her cringe. 
“Sorry, I forgot, I might be a little late tomorrow.”
“Oh?” 
“I’ve got plans that probably won’t wrap up until half past eight at the earliest.” Knowing Alya, the meeting would definitely go overtime, meaning she would be cutting it pretty close. “I can find a way to bail…” But given the way Alya had been acting lately… it would probably be best not to leave early… Alya had been a little too pushy about her involvement and support of the Adrien schemes. To say nothing of all the… the vibes she had been getting from Alya… 
“Hang onto it until the end of patrol tomorrow then,” Ladybug said, pressing the miraculous back into her hands. 
“What? But…” Ladybug always took back the miraculous after battles and patrols. As far as she knew, none of the temp heroes had ever gotten to hold onto their miraculous outside of active use. 
Ladybug closed her fingers around the miraculous. “I trust you with it.” 
                                                          ***
She had been looking forward to her first solo patrol. She had been looking forward to taking in the city at night in peace. Or at least, as much peace as could be found in Paris at night. 
The point being, she had been looking forward to it. 
And then Shadowmoth had just had to go and ruin her evening. 
What was worse, he was interrupting Marinette. 
And given how tight Marinette’s deadline was… she had no interest in letting this fight drag out. 
“Taste my wrath!” Jets of molten cheese burst from the prongs of Fondoom’s oversized fondue fork and streaked through the air toward Ladybug. Ladybug dove to the side, ducking behind the cover of an abandoned car. The stench of sour milk, compost, something akin to Kim’s gym socks, and a general funk hit her like a wall with such force it almost knocked her over. From behind the car Ladybug had rolled behind she could hear gagging. 
“That is revolting,” she gasped as she stumbled back a few steps, narrowing missing a puddle of gooey cheese. The last thing she wanted to do was get stuck in the stuff. 
“Artisanal cheeses are wasted on the likes of you,” Fondoom snarled before lunging at her with his fork. She danced out of the way, nimbly—but narrowly—avoiding being speared by the fork. Just like the odour he and his attacks were emitting, Fondoom was relentless. His fork was a silver blur as he swung and stabbed at her, all while trying to douse her in molten cheese. She was too fast for him, but she was getting nauseous. 
She unfurled her bolas from her waist and snapped them at Fondoom, throwing him off balance. He had to catch himself against the ground using his fork. But what he had failed to notice was how close he had gotten to some of the pungent puddles he had left all over the place. 
“No. One. Appreciates,” he growled as he struggled to pull his fork from the cheese, “Fine. Cheeses. Anymore.” He wrenched his fork free with a roar.
“Not when they smell like that,” she quipped, snapping her bolas as he raised his fork, sending him skittering back to plant his feet directly in the cheese he had just freed himself from. 
“Lucky charm!” She looked in the direction of Ladybug’s nasally shout, being careful to keep an eye on the akuma as he struggled against his own cheese. Ladybug’s yoyo shot up into the air as she pinched her nose shut with her other hand. 
A pair of red and black spotted nose plugs appeared in a rain of sparkling light before dropping into Ladybug’s outstretched hand. She slipped one over her nose, and then turned to her. “Tigress!” 
She easily caught the nose plug, and slipped it into place. 
“Sweet relief,” she sighed, and Ladybug immediately burst into giggles. “What?” 
“You- you sound funny,” Ladybug laughed, “And you’ve got cheese in your hair.” 
“Yeah, well,” she said, having to hold back her own laughter at how oddly nasal and high her voice sounded, “so do you.” 
Ladybug blinked at her, and then her giggles descended into howls of laughter as she picked her way through the cheese covered street. By the time Ladybug had made her way over, she was almost doubled over; they had to lean on each other as they tried to control their laughter. 
“If- if my hair stinks of cheese after your miraculous cure-” she gasped between peals of laughter, “you owe me a bottle of shampoo. Make that three,” she added, playfully shoving Ladybug’s shoulder.” 
At some point in their hysterics, Fondoom had managed to fall flat onto his back into the cheese and was well and truly stuck. And it seemed the civilians who had been cowering in the shops and cars lining the street had caught on that the danger had passed, as they were beginning to emerge. Vaguely, she was aware of some pointing their phones at her and Ladybug as they both fought to keep it together. 
But it was hard. 
Between how ridiculous they sounded and must have looked with cheese in their hair, and with how outright ridiculous this akuma had been—seriously, what had Shadowmoth been thinking?—and how tired they both were, how could they not laugh? 
“We should- we should…” Ladybug wheezed as she wiped a stray tear and gestured uselessly at Fondoom, who had seemingly given up struggling against the cheese and was just staring forlornly at the sky, muttering about how ‘no one appreciated traditional cheese anymore.’ 
“I’m- ready when you are,” she gasped as she tried to push herself up from leaning on her friend. 
“M’lady! I’m-” Chat’s breathless gasp snapped her out of the worst of her laughter. She turned just in time to see Chat staring at her and Ladybug, still leaning against each other and stifling the odd giggle. “here…” he finished, his voice trailing off as his eyes darted between the two of them. “What’s so funny?” 
“Nothing,” Ladybug said, forcing back her laughter as she straightened up. “It was stupid.” There was still a ring of laughter in her voice as she tried to put on her professional smile. “We should deal with the akuma.” 
“Right-” her grip tightened on her bolas, ready to strike them against the fork and release the akuma when Chat cried out. 
“Cataclysm!” A streak of black whizzed in front of her, and the next thing she knew, the fork had crumbled and a dark butterfly had fluttered out of it’s remains. 
Chat smiled smugly at her, before letting his gaze land on Ladybug as she purified the akuma. Once the silvery white butterfly had been released from her yoyo, Ladybug turned to her ruefully and slipped off her nose plug. With a grimace, she slipped her own off handed it to Ladybug, who promptly cast them into the air with a hurried cry of “Miraculous Ladybug!” 
The swarm of Ladybugs rushed over and past her—hopefully removing the cheese and stench from her hair as they went—before swarming out over the street. By the time they had disappeared, the worst of the smell was gone. But a fainter—though still strong—aroma remained, emanating from the rather ruffled looking man lying in the street, clutching a fondue fork—now normal sized—and a box of Epoisse de Bourgogne. 
“I just wanted to introduce her to the world of fine cheeses” the man mumbled dolefully as he sat up. 
“Hey,” she said quietly, making her way over to crouch beside him. Gently, she rested her hand on his shoulder, ignoring the beep coming from her miraculous. She still had two minutes. “Maybe… maybe next time start with something a little less-” she stopped herself before she could say rank. “Odiferous. Work your…” 
“Girlfriend.”
“Work your girlfriend’s way up to it.” The man offered her a shaky smile. Satisfied, she stood and offered him her hand. Once she had pulled the man to his feet, she turned. 
“It’s been fur-ever, M’lady,” Chat said as leaned against his staff. “What say you and I have a moonlight picnic? All that cheese made me hungry.” 
How? How could anyone be hungry after smelling that? 
“I can’t, I keep telling you, I’m busy.” 
Chat pouted as he pushed himself off his staff to stand up straight. “Too busy for me?” 
“Chat…” Ladybug sighed, reaching up to massage her temples. But before she could say anything else, her earring beeped. And her bracelet was quick to follow. 
“That’s one minute for me.” 
Even if it hadn’t been, she would have said it was. She knew he kept sending Ladybug messages about patrols, and the last couple of battles, he had complained about it. Multiple times. 
And he seemed completely unaware that Ladybug’s patience was waning. 
Ladybug nodded at her, then turned back to Chat. “Can you help him home?” she asked, nodding to the man. 
“But-”
“Chat.” 
“Fine,” Chat grumbled. 
Ladybug nodded at him, the turned to her. “C’mon. I think we can call it a night for your patrol.“Nodding, she followed after Ladybug. “Be honest,” Ladybug said quietly as they turned, “does my hair still stink of cheese?” 
A bark of laughter escaped her as she shook her head. “No, you’re good.” 
Ladybug giggled. “You too.” And then she cast her yoyo, and let it pull her up to the rooftops. 
She was about to follow when she froze, feeling the invisible weight of eyes on her.. Quickly, she glanced over her shoulder; Chat was still standing there, watching her. 
Shaking her head, she turned, swung herself toward the roofline. 
                                                          ***
“I’ll be back in a few minutes,” Bustier said with another of her syrupy smiles as she hovered by the open door to the classroom, “M. Damocles only needs to see me for a few minutes, so take this time to review the stages of the Hero’s Journey, and then we’ll discuss when I return.” With that, their teacher left the room and headed towards the principals office, seemingly blithely ignorant of the fact that no one in the class was even remotely engaging in the lesson. 
“And…” Alix said, dragging out the word as she craned her neck to look out the windows into the hallway, “she’s gone.” 
“Did you guys see the pictures from the battle last night?” Rose squealed as soon as the coast had been declared clear. 
“I missed it,” Alya moaned before flopping dramatically onto her desk. “I didn’t get any pictures,” Alya continued, her voice muffled by the desk.
“But babe, you told me you were heading there-”
“I got stuck in cheese!” Alya cried, sitting back up. “I was only a block away! And all those people- they were right there. The pictures were amazing! And it smelled disgusting!” 
Marinette patted Alya’s shoulder comfortingly. But the motion seemed a little more awkward than usual. A little more reserved. 
“They are pretty amazing,” Alix said as she glanced at her phone. She craned her neck to get a better look at Alix’s screen. 
One of the many pictures taken the previous night was pulled up on the phone. It was one of the ones that had been taken when she and Ladybug were in the midst of their fit of laughter. 
“I wish I had been there…” Kim sighed longingly. “What?” he asked, when met with incredulous looks. “Have you seen the way Tigress throws those weight thingies of hers?” 
“Bolas,” Max corrected. 
“Boas,” Kim repeated—sort of—“I would love to challenge her to a discus throw.” 
“My money’s on Tigress,” Alix snorted. 
“Mine too! She’s so cool!” Rose chirped. 
“Yeah, Marc and I are writing her into the next issue of the comic.”
She bit the inside of her keep to keep her grin in check. It would look weird if she just started randomly grinning—of course, it was hardly random given she was the one they were heaping praise upon—but try as she might, the heat in her cheeks wasn’t subsiding. Under the ruse of doodling, she dropped her gaze to try and hide her flaming cheeks. But through her curtain of hair, she caught sight of Adrien. 
Like everyone else seated in the front rows—excluding Chloe and Sabrina who seemed to be skipping class entirely—he was turned towards the back to be more part of the conversation. But unlike everyone else, he looked less than thrilled by the topic of conversation. Sure, he had his usual, bland, model smile pasted on his face. But his smile was tight, and his eyes were hard. 
There was that green-eyed monster again…
“Yeah?” Mylène asked. 
“Yeah, she’s been around so much lately, and she and Ladybug are obviously friends, so it seemed like a good choice to bring her in. Plus she adds a really cool dynamic.” 
Adrien’s smile slipped at that. 
Marinette’s on the other hand… “I think that’s a great idea, Nathanial! I think it’s high time Ladybug had a friend.” 
“What about Chat Noir?” 
Everyone turned to blink at Adrien. It hadn’t been an… outburst per se, but it had been… unexpected. Based on the pink tinge that was quickly rising in his face, it seemed he hadn’t meant to say that quite so loud. If at all… 
Ivan cocked his head to the side. “What do you mean?”
“Well, Chat Noir and Ladybug have been together since the beginning.”
The others nodded in agreement. But she saw Marinette’s smile slip from her face. 
“But it’s different with him,” Alya said. She wasn’t sure who was more surprised. Her, Marinette, or Adrien. 
“What do you mean?” Adrien somehow meekly demanded. 
Alya shrugged. “Sure, they’re best friends. But they’re also meant to be, so that makes their dynamic a little different. Tigress is a girl, so it’s only natural they’re going to talk about stuff Ladybug wouldn’t normally talk to Chat Noir about.” She didn’t miss the jealous edge in Alya’s voice. If Alya had been who she thought she had been, she was betting Alya had been hoping she would be filling the role of Ladybug’s friend. 
It was more than a little ironic… 
“That makes sense,” Kim mused before brightening. “It’s like how you girls talk about who you have crushes o- ow!” Kim turned in his seat to glare at Rose. “What was that for?” 
Rose smiled sweetly at him, still kicking her legs. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she said innocently with a dangerous glint in her eyes. 
“Right…” Kim said, shrinking back a little and warily eying Rose’s swinging legs. He had obviously received the message loud and clear. 
“They seem like the kind of friends who would tell each other everything,” Rose sighed happily. “It’s so cute seeing that side of Ladybug.”
Maybe not everything… 
But pretty close… 
“Ladybug would never tell someone her identity,” Adrien mumbled.
She snapped her head to look at Adrien, but before her gaze settled on blond hair and green eyes, brown eyes behind glasses caught her attention. Nino’s eyes widened as his previously thought-furrowed brows rose to disappear under the brim of his cap as her eyes met his. He ducked his head to look down at his desk before—very obviously—turning his attention to Adrien. 
That was… weird- 
“I concur, Ladybug has always been very protective regarding her identity. However,” Max said, the light glinting off his glasses as he looked up from his phone, “they do appear to be very close friends.” 
“Yes!” Markov added, “we have recently been analyzing resources on body language to update my database, and Tigress and Ladybug regularly display body language that communicates a deep sense of trust and friendship!”
“And even if they don’t share their identities, they totally seem like share everything else!” 
“Maybe…” Adrien said, though it sounded more like he was talking to himself. Disgruntlement was no longer showing through the cracks in his model facade. His brows furrowed as if he were deep in thought. There was a spark in his eye that reminded her of-
“I wonder what they talk about,” Ivan mused. 
Her own brows furrowed as she watched Adrien. Why was he suddenly so-
“Bustier’s coming!” 
                                                        ***
For the second time since she had started patrolling for Ladybug, Chat Noir was waiting for her at the meeting place. In fact, he was early. It was… weird. 
The first time, he had obviously been expecting Ladybug despite being told multiple times Ladybug wouldn’t be patrolling for the last two weeks of June. Every other night, he had shown up after her, all but dragging his feet.  
She held back a groan. She was still a few rooftops away, but with her enhanced vision and her night vision—one of the many perks of the tiger miraculous—she had a clear view of him. He was sitting in another clearly practiced pose that was meant to look casual. Ladybug had told him—again—she wouldn’t be patrolling… but based on the way he was waiting… apparently that didn’t mean anything. 
She was not in the mood for an argument tonight; all she wanted was to blow off some steam, make sure there were no signs of any akumas or sentimonsters, and then go home and curl up in bed with a book.  
While she had successfully held back her groan before, she couldn’t stop a sigh from escaping her now. 
There was no point in putting off the inevitable any further. 
With the effortless grace her miraculous granted her, she crossed the rest of the rooftops and landed behind Chat. His cat ears twitched at the sound of her landing—it had seemed like a good idea to clue him in to her arrival before he saw her—and he pushed himself off the chimney he had been leaning against as if posing for a campaign. 
He turned to her with a suave smile.
That didn’t drop the moment he saw it was her… 
What-
“Tigress,” he greeted her, seemingly channeling every drop of charisma he had in his body into his voice. “How are you?” 
Ok…
She had thought it was weird he was early, but she didn’t even know how to begin to describe… this… 
“Fine…” she said carefully, watching him warily as he grinned and sauntered toward her. 
“Good… good,” he murmured, almost to himself. 
What was going on? 
Had she missed something? 
Had he been zapped by an akuma?
He tilted his head back to take in the lights of the city, and let out a wistful sigh. “Isn’t the city beautiful at night?” 
“Sure…” 
Where was he going with this? 
As if finally noticing she wasn’t charmed, he turned to grin at her. “Look,” he said as he leaned on his staff and offered her what she was sure would be a charming grin, if not for the fact that she was utterly un-charmed by it. And wasn’t that a sudden change in tune… “I think you and I maybe got off on the wrong foot.” 
And whose fault was that?
“I mean, we are practically cousins, after all.” That line? Again? “And shouldn’t family stick together?” 
She would stick by Luka and her ma through anything. 
Chat, on the other hand, was not family, no matter what miraculous she had. 
But she would be lying if she wasn’t curious to see where he was trying to steer this conversation. And agreeing with him seemed like the most direct path to his intended destination. “Sure.” It was technically a sentiment she agreed with, just not in the context he had given. “Should we get going?” As much as she wanted to figure out the sudden attitude change, it was starting to feel awkward just standing around with him being so… yeah. 
And she could just as easily get to the bottom of this while blowing off some of this awkward energy. 
“After you,” he said with a bow that wasn’t the least bit mocking. But was plenty thick with obvious attempts at flattery. 
Ok… 
Casting another wary glance at him, she loosened her bolas and swung them to latch onto some scaffolding on the next building over. 
Chat insisted on making small talk as they scoured the city for any signs of Shadowmoth. It was… she wanted to say it was a nice break from the open hostility and the pointed, green-eyed glances he usually shot her way. But in some ways, his sudden friendliness was worse. At least she hand known what to expect the last few patrols. 
But this? 
He obviously had some kind of angle. 
He obviously wanted something. 
“Tigress?” 
She shook her head to try and clear her thoughts, and turned to Chat. “Sorry, what?” 
“I’m ready for a break, want to take a rest up there?” he asked, pointing with his staff toward the Palais Garnier in the distance. 
“Uh, yeah. Sure.” 
He nodded, and shot her what many would consider a winning grin. Then he took a running start and used his staff to launch himself into the air in the direction of the Palais Garnier. She watched him through narrowed eyes as he bounded across the rooftops, her frown returning. 
So far, he had not been very forthcoming on what it was he wanted. It seemed he was more interested in laying on the flattery. 
Thickly. 
She had a feeling she wouldn’t like it—whatever it was he wanted—when she did find out…   
Before she could psych herself out, she ran toward the edge of the roof and leapt into the air. 
 By the time she made it to the roof, he was waiting in yet another perfectly practiced pose. She recognized it as another pose from one of his previous campaigns. Sure, in the magazine he had been leaning against a bookshelf in the library whereas now, he was leaning against the base of one of the Lequesne Pagasi. But the offhand grace and winsome smile that were obviously meant to make him look approachable were the same. 
She had barely taken two steps onto the roof when he turned the full force of his smile on her. Not that it had any effect. “You hungry?” Before she could so much as reply, he was already busying himself with opening a compartment in his baton. Carefully, he extracted a box and opened its lid before holding it out to her. 
They were chocolates. 
Expensive chocolates. 
Expensive, chocolatey bribes if his sudden change in tune was anything to go by. 
But sure. She would bite. 
Carefully, she selected a chocolate from the box. 
Just because she took the chocolate didn’t mean she had to take the bribe. 
She popped the chocolate into her mouth. It was rich and decadent and tasted as expensive as she imagined it had been. Though she didn’t dwell too long on how expensive; some things were better left unknown. It was amazing. But-
“They’re good, right?” 
She nodded. “They are, thanks.” 
He smiled like the cat that had just caught the canary. He was obviously pleased with himself. “Have another,” he coaxed, holding the box out to her. 
She complied. It wasn’t like she was about to turn down free chocolate. 
And they were amazing. But as amazing as they were, she swore she could taste the strings attached to them. 
She watched as he popped a chocolate into his own mouth and hummed in bliss. They finished the rest of the chocolates in relative silence. With every bite she took, the less she tasted chocolate and the more she tasted the bitterness of the bribe. 
“So Tigress…” he turned to her, raking a hand through his golden hair and offering her a charming yet abashed smile that reeked of being rehearsed. “Can I ask you something.” 
Struggling to chew the last of her chocolate, she nodded. 
“You and Ladybug are friends, right?” 
So that was what this was all about? What they had been talking about in class earlier?
Typical. 
Thickly, she swallowed the last bite of her chocolate. “Yeah, she and I are friends,” she said carefully.
“And you two are close, right?
Technically, she and Marinette were close. “I guess you could say that-”
“So you tell each other stuff then.” It wasn’t so much a question as a statement. His eyes were fixed on her firmly now, and if she weren’t a tigress, she imaged she would have felt like prey. 
But as she was a tigress… “A little bit, but not much.” She and Marinette on the other hand…
“What are her favourite flowers?” 
“What-“ 
“I’ve always gone with red roses because they’re classic.” His attention was suddenly off her as he gazed thoughtfully out at the skyline. But just as suddenly, his eyes snapped back to her. “But maybe that’s the problem; so what other kinds of flowers does she like?” 
Cherry blossoms. Peonies. Lilacs. 
To name a few. 
Luka could probably recite all of Marinette’s favourites in reverse order in his sleep. 
“You don’t know?” 
“Obviously,” he chuckled, though there was a tinge of bitter annoyance, “that’s why I asked.”
“And you’re asking me because…” she let her voice trail off as she turned to raise a brow at him.
“The two of you are friends.” He said it like it was supposed to explain all the intricacies of the Universe. 
“Yeah. But why not ask her? And why wait this long to ask?” 
“I thought roses were the right direction. They symbolize love, you know. True love, to be exact.” He sighed as he ran a hand through his hair again, and shot her a a charming yet hopeless smile that she was sure was meant to elicit pity. “But I guess they weren’t the right choice after all…”
Because it was the flowers that were the issue… 
“And girls like picnics, right?” 
“What-”
“I thought they did. And they always do romantic, moonlight picnics in the movies. But every time I try one, it never seems to work. But maybe a picnic isn’t the right direction? Maybe I need to do something bolder?”
She bit back a groan. “Some girls like picnics, sure. But not all girls.” Of course, Marinette did like picnics. But it was always more about the company… “And I don’t think-”
“Ok, so no picnics,” Chat said as he stood abruptly. He turned, and began to pace, completely ignoring what she had been about to say. “But then what? Maybe a boat ride along the Seine? No… Too many tourists. The cinema might be fun… I could take her to see the new Ladybug and Chat Noir movie!” He paused in his pacing, then frowned before muttering, “But all our fans would probably be watching us if we did something so public, and that wouldn’t be very romantic. Maybe I could- no, that would be no good. A rooftop picnic is the best option for privacy but those haven’t worked before-” he whirled to face her, and she swore she saw the lightbulb go off over his head. “I’ve got it!” 
Oh no. 
“It’s perfect!” 
Here we go… 
“If you put in a good word for me to Ladybug, apparently girl friends talk to each other about stuff they don’t talk about with their guy friends,” he added for her benefit, as if it was something she didn’t already know, “then she’ll have to agree! And I can bring takeout from her favourite restaurant- do you know what it is, by the way?” he was pacing with renewed vigour and energy. But it wasn’t the aimless pacing of before. It seemed he was set on his plan. “And her favourite flowers? You never told me what they were. If I have her favourites of everything ready for her at the picnic then it will be perfect and she’ll realize-”
“It isn’t going to work.”  
He froze misstep and turned to look at her. The mask of cheery camaraderie slipped. Just for a second. The it was back. But much more forced than before. 
“Of course it will,” he said, trying to laugh lightheartedly. But it sounded just as forced as his smile. “It’s easy! You put in a good word for me, since she listens to you,” despite his obvious attempts, he wasn’t able to mask the bitterness in his voice. “And you tell me what she would want for a first date-” 
“You can’t use my friendship with her to try and date her.” 
“But nothing I’ve done has worked!” 
She shrugged. “That’s life.” 
He glowered at her. “So you’re just going to stand in the way of true love? Of destiny?” 
Fate… destiny… the Universe… 
Whatever he wanted to call it, it wasn’t like she hadn’t been standing in its way for the past few months. 
She refused to shrink under his glower. He seemed to realize pretty quick that she wasn’t going to balk under his glare. “You just don’t get it,” he snapped, his face shifting into a petulant pout. “She and I are meant to be. She’s the only one who doesn’t see it. But she never even gives me a chance!” He stalked back toward the statue and leaned against it sullenly, kicking the stone of the roof for good measure. ”I’m just so tired of her turning me down. I wish she would just stop rejecting me and realize what’s been obvious to everyone else since the start.”
His words hung heavy in the air. With his tantrum over and done with—she hoped—he seemed set on moping. And frankly, she was long past tired of it. Of his jealousy-fuelled hostility. Of his whining and complaining. Of his sulking. What she was going to say would probably make him mad. But she was over it. 
She just hoped it would be worth it. 
“You know,” she said slowly, watching him out of the corner of her eye, “there is a way for you to get her to stop rejecting you.”
He perked up immediately, turning to look at her with the delight of someone what had just been told they were going to be told the secrets of the Universe. “Really? How?” 
“It’ll be hard-“
“I’ll do anything to get her to stop rejecting me-“
“Stop asking her out.” 
His face went blank. He stared at her silently, looking as if he was trying to puzzle out one of Mendeleiev’s homework assignments. “How will that-“
“You’re tired of her saying no?” He nodded. “Then stop asking. She’s already given you her answer-“
“But-“
“And she’s been way nicer about it than she needs to. And she’s given way more reasons than she needs to. No is reason enough.” 
“You just don’t get it- you’re a temp. She and I have been in it since the beginning. Me and her against the world,” he sighed wistfully, “we were chosen to be partners. It was destiny-“
“And what if I had been chosen instead?”  She wasn’t sure which of them was more surprised she had asked that. 
“What-“
But it was still a relevant question. 
“What if I  had been the one chosen to be Ladybug? Would you and I be destined for each other?” That felt wrong to say on so many levels. She sent a silent apology to Rose. 
She could practically see the gears turning in his head as he spluttered out nonsense. “What- but- you- she- no. No. It’s different-“
“I don’t see how.” 
He laughed, but it was strained. “Look, I’m flattered and all but you know I love-“
“Don’t be.” The beginnings of the casually charming smile that had been making its way onto his face fell back to blank confusion. “I’m seeing someone. And you’re not my type. Not even close. All I’m saying is, magical jewelry seems like a pretty flimsy foundation for true love. Much less destiny.”  She stood and made a show of stretching. “Now I’m going to go finish patrol-“
“You’re wrong!” Before she could say anything else, he pushed himself off of the statue and vaulted himself off into the darkness, disappearing into the shadows. 
She groaned. It was like arguing with a brick wall. 
                                                          ***
To say patrolling solo was a relief after the previous night was an understatement. She needed the peace and quiet of solitude to clear her head after all of that. And sure, maybe intervening in an armed robbery wasn’t exactly what she would call quiet or peaceful… 
But at least it wasn’t headache inducing the way arguing with a certain cat was… 
One of the masked robbers ran at her, viciously swinging the knife he was holding. 
Really, he should have known better.
Easily and with grace, she stepped aside, using her arm to block the knife as she caught his wrist. Using his own momentum against him, she disarmed and flipped him to the ground in one fluid motion. His blade clattered against the ground, far out of his reach as she pinned him with a knee to his back. 
The man grunted, trying to hit her and throw her off of him, but it was futile. He couldn’t reach her with his free hand and with her miraculous, she was too strong for him. 
“Hey!” 
Her attention snapped to two of the other robbers. They were—rather stupidly—running towards her, brandishing their crowbars. Without relinquishing her grip on the man she had subdued, she loosened her bolas from her waist. 
Before the robbers rushing to attack her could even begin to rethink their idiotic plan, she had her bolas free and swinging. Their brash confidence turned to panic as she smirked at them, right before she loosed the bolas. 
They streaked through the air in a blur; their whizzing melding with the squeaks of sneakers against tiles as the robbers tried to skid to a stop. The sound of distant sirens joined the mix. The two cried out as the bolas tangled around them both, knocking the crowbars from their hands and binding them together in a mishmash of limbs. They immediately tripped over each other and toppled to the ground where they continued to struggle uselessly against her weapon. 
A sharp inhale that sounded an awful lot like a whimper came from the back of the shop.  
She snapped her gaze to the fourth and last robber. His eyes were wide and wild with panic as he looked at her. What she could see off his face was stark pale next to the black of his ski mask.  His gaze darted around the shop and landed on the window the robbers had originally broken through. 
“You really want to do that?” she asked. 
His gaze snapped back to her. He looked like he would rather do anything but try and go up against her, but he also looked like he didn’t want to stick around. Especially with the sirens drawing so close. The hand he was brandishing his knife with was shaking, but his feet were—albeit hesitantly—shifting. 
Keeping a careful and tight grip on the man she was pinning, she feigned lunging toward the last robber. With a yelp, he skittered backward, tripping and stumbling over his feet to land on his behind. His knife clattered to the ground, and was promptly kicked out of his reach by his own flailing feet as he scrambled back and away from her. Directly into the back corner of the jewelry display he had been in the middle of emptying into his forgotten sack. 
“That’s what I thought.” 
Barely minutes later, police officers burst into the room with Officer Roger—he and her ma had had enough run ins that he and her family were on a first name basis now—leading the charge, only to find the robbers subdued. Or, in the case of the last one, cowering. After that, the arrest was quick with the only real delay being untangling the robbers from her bolas. 
As the last of the robbers was led out in handcuffs, she turned to Officer Roger, who had coughed quietly in a clear attempt to get her attention. With an air of formality and admiration, he stuck his hand out toward her. 
“Thank you for your service, Purple Tigress.”
As she shook his hand, she couldn’t help but wonder how he would react if he knew he was shaking the hand of Anarka Couffaine’s daughter. 
Spontaneous combustion didn’t seem entirely unrealistic…  
“It was no problem, I’m just doing my job.”
                                                           ***
“So, how did it go tonight?” Ladybug asked as soon as she ducked under the tarps her ma had hung over the stage to cover it from the rain they had gotten earlier in the day. “Any trouble?” 
“Everything was fine. Well- there was a bit of a robbery, but it wasn’t any trouble-” 
“A robbery? What happened? Are you ok? I didn’t get any messages I’m so sorry I should have been there to-”
“Hey, hey,” she said, quickly placing a gentle hand on Ladybug’s shoulder to interrupt her spiralling. “I was fine. I’m sorry, I should have let you know sooner. There just wasn’t time to alert you and stop them so I just… went for it. And then I got caught up in giving my statement to the police and well… yeah, it isn’t really an excuse. I’m sorry-”
“Don’t be.” 
She blinked in surprise at the force in Ladybug’s voice. She hadn’t realized it, but her gaze had drifted down to her feet; the last thing she had wanted was to disappoint Marinette or cause her any stress. She forced herself to look back up at Ladybug; she was staring at her intently, her blue eyes burning. 
“You’re ok?” Wordlessly, she nodded. “You aren’t hurt?” She shook her head. 
Ladybug nodded. And then she smiled… 
And it suddenly dawned on her what it was that was fueling the flames in Ladybug’s eyes. 
It was pride… 
“You have nothing to apologize for. I’m just glad you’re ok.” 
“It was really no big deal…” she mumbled, her cheeks suddenly flaming. 
“Hey, none of that,” Ladybug said gently. “Remember what Roarr said?” 
She nodded, though she still couldn’t fight the flush in her face. Speaking of Roarr… 
Quickly, she dropped her transformation. And once she had given Roarr a quick cuddle and one of the candies she had taken to keeping in her pockets incase of emergencies, she slipped the miraculous off and handed it back to Ladybug. 
Ladybug popped it into the box she had waiting. But instead of closing the lid and slipping it into her yoyo, she stared thoughtfully down at the miraculous. 
Awkwardly, she shifted her weight between her feet.” Ladybug…?” 
“Hmm?” Ladybug glanced up at her. 
“Is everything… ok?” she asked hesitantly.
“Oh! Yeah! I’m just…” Ladybug’s gaze flickered back down to the tiger miraculous. Her spotted hand closed around the box, snapping the lid shut before slipping it into her yoyo. When she met her gaze again, Ladybug was smiling. It was a small smile, still tinged with thoughtfulness, but it was genuine. “I’m just thinking about something a friend told me a while ago.”
“Oh.” 
Ladybug’s eyes, still burning, were also full of warmth. “Thank you again. For everything.” 
“It’s nothing…” 
Ladybug let out a quiet chuckle. “Trust me, it’s everything.” 
                                                          ***
“And… boom! He’s down!” Alix crowed, pumping her fist in the air, nearly punching Ivan in the face as she whooped at the video playing on Max’s laptop. 
“I want to learn how to do that-”
“No,” Nathaniel said, emphatically shaking his head, “you do not need to know how to do that, Kim.” 
“Dudes, how is her aim that good?” 
She watched silently as she—well, Tigress—threw her bolas, ensnaring the two robbers. The security camera footage from the jewelry shop had been pulled, and had ended up on the late night news last night. And the early morning news… 
“She didn’t even have to do anything to take out that last guy,” Mylène murmured in awe, her eyes glued to the screen. 
“She’s pretty tough,” Ivan agreed. 
“She’s a total badass is what she is!” Alix corrected. 
She tipped her head forward, letting her curtain of hair conceal the grin she couldn’t wipe from her face and her cheeks, which given how warm they were had to been tinged pink. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Adrien roll his eyes. He looked like he had just swallowed a lemon. 
“Yeah,” Marinette said as she watched the footage play for the umpteenth time, a wide grin on her face. “She’s incredible!” 
Before she could completely combust from compliment overload, Rose hummed thoughtfully. She turned to look at her girlfriend just in time to see Rose tilt her head to the side, her brows furrowed, as she watched to footage. 
“I wonder if Ladybug will make her a permanent hero?” 
“There’s no way!” 
Everyone turned to stare at Adrien. His hands were splayed on the table—he hadn’t quite slammed the table but he looked like he had come pretty close—and his mouth was a tight, twisted line. But as he seemed to realize everyone was suddenly looking at him, his face shifted, his cheeks turning pink. But the sourness in his eyes hadn’t fully vanished, even as embarrassment seemed to overtake him.   
“Why not, dude?” 
“Well, because…” Adrien began to flounder. 
“She has been at almost all of the most recent battles,” Nathaniel said absently. 
“And her presence during those battles has improved the efficiency with which akumas and sentimonsters are dealt with,” Max added. 
“It is true! We did the calculations ourselves!” 
Max nodded. “Additionally, it seems she has been added to the patrol roster.” 
“Yeah, well…” 
“But none of the other heroes were ever made permanent,” Alya noted, a tinge of jealousy creeping into her voice. 
It seemed Adrien had found the life line he needed, and he latched on. “Exactly. It’s always been Ladybug and Chat Noir! The black cat and ladybug from the start. Creation and destruction. Yin and yang. ”
“So?” 
She wasn’t sure who out the class was most shocked by Marinette’s question, but for his part, Adrien looked at her like she had grown a second head. 
 “Adding another full time hero would throw off the balance,” he replied with the utmost confidence and assuredness. 
And yet…
“It’s always been the two of them. Why mess with destiny?”   
It seemed Adrien wasn’t so much clinging to a life line as he was grasping at straws. 
                                                          ***
Chat glared at her as soon as he landed on the roof. 
It seemed they were back to that… 
“You’re here again,” he muttered. 
She stood, and took a breath. “I am.” Already, she could feel the beginnings of a headache coming on. 
“Look,” he said, crossing his arms as he stalked across the roof towards her, “I don’t know what game you’re playing, but it isn’t going to work.” 
Game? 
He thought this was a game? 
Why did that not surprise her?
“There is no game-” 
“Then whatever this is,” he hissed,  gesturing to her, “this ‘trying to replace Ladybug’ thing-” 
“I’m not trying to replace Ladybug!” she all but shouted. 
“I never see her anymore! Except for during akuma attacks.” It was almost impressive how he was able to hiss and whine at the same time. “It’s always you.” 
“I told you, she’s busy.” 
“She’s always too busy for me these days-“
Something she deeply admired about her brother was his ability to stay cool. Especially with a ma like theirs. He was slow to anger, and even slower to act on that anger. And his patience at times seemed near infinite. Sometimes to his detriment. 
But is was still something she admired about Luka. And something she tried to emulate. 
And she had tried. 
She really had. 
The last thing she wanted to do was make things awkward or more difficult for Ladybug in any way. 
But there was only so much she could take. 
And she was at her limits. 
Past them, actually. 
“It isn’t about you!” she snapped. “She’s busy. She has things she needs to do.”
“So she goes to you instead of me?”
“She asked. And if she hadn’t, I would have offered.” Chat snorted. “It’s not fair that she has to do so much on her own.”
“She isn’t on her own! She has me! That should be enough.” Chat threw his arms in the air, turned, stalked a few steps away, and then whirled back to face her as he gestured to himself. “If she wanted more help, she should have asked me!”
“You’re her partner?”
“Her only partner,” he said coldly. 
“Then she shouldn’t have to ask you to step up.”
“She and I have kissed! Multiple times!” 
“What does that have to do with anything?”  
“She and I are partners. Soul mates. How is that not destiny?”
“Let me count the ways.” She held up a single finger. “If you have to have all your memories erased in order for someone to kiss you, your ‘destiny’ is looking pretty grim.”
“The Oblivio thing happened one time! We didn’t have amnesia the other-“
“Yeah,” she held up a second finger, “Nothing says romance like having to kiss someone because they’re brainwashed and trying to bash your brains out.”
“You’re just jealous,” Chat spat. 
“Of who? Of what?”
“I-“
“I’m seeing someone. She and I are-”
“She?” 
“Yes, she. And no, I’m not dating Ladybug, nor do I want to. She and I are friends. Good friends. But that’s it. Or do you think I’m jealous that you’re her ‘partner?’” He opened his mouth to retort, but she was done listening to his ludicrous accusations. “I’m here to do a job. A job she asked me to do. And I’m going to do my job to the best of my abilities, and have her back because that’s what she needs of me. And I am not going to let her down.” 
He planted his staff against the roof hard enough for the sound to cut her off. Momentarily. Before he could open his mouth again, she she drew herself up to her full height and stepped forward with the force of the words flowing out of her mouth. 
“You don’t own her. And she doesn’t owe you her love. So stop acting like it and step up and do your job.” 
Her chest was heaving; she hadn’t expected to get so into it with him. 
She hadn’t necessarily meant to. 
But she couldn’t bring herself to regret it. 
Not even a little bit. 
She had meant every word she had said. 
He glowered at her. 
And then he turned tail and disappeared into the darkness. 
                                                      ***
She grit her teeth as she flexed her claws. 
Why? 
Why tonight?  
Why couldn’t Shadowmoth just chill? 
Marinette didn’t have much time left to work on her dress. The dance was the day after tomorrow. She had said she would be done her dress on time, but that had been earlier in the day. When the girls had been pestering her for a sneak peek—because Marinette had been very tightlipped about her dress—when she had thought she would have the entire evening. 
Except now, they were dealing with a category five akuma. 
And it was not going well. 
With a furious cry, she slashed at the net the akuma had trapped her in, shredding it to pieces and freeing herself and the civilians she had been trying to evacuate. The tattered remains of the net floated down to the ground around her as she scowled at her surroundings. 
Chat was supposed to be covering her.
And she would hardly call his half-hearted shout of warning as the net was already twisting itself around her and the civilians sufficient. 
At least Exterminator’s attention was wholly focused on Chat now. Snapping her attention back to the civilians, she ushered them into the closest alleyway. “Get as far away as possible, and stay out of sight. I don’t know how long this is going to take,” she said before turning tail and sprinting back into the street. 
Already, this akuma fight was taking longer than it should have, with the multitude of traps the akuma kept setting. And she was not feeling optimistic about it wrapping up anytime soon. 
“Don’t you know cats were the original pest control?” Chat laughed from where he was perched on his staff in the middle of the street, laughing as he watched Exterminator struggle back to his feet. “You really think you can catch me?” Chat smirked in her direction as she ran past the shredded net, his eyes flashing. 
Rude. 
She skidded to a halt just in time to see Exterminator’s smirk, and the quick flick of his wrist that sent a roll of oversized white paper unfurling along the street under Chat’s perch. 
Her eyes widened. 
“Chat! Look out!” 
Whether he was too busy gloating or just didn’t bother to heed her warning was unclear. She was already in motion, rushing toward him, but she was too late. She watched as Exterminator pulled out what would have been a comically enormous fly swatter if the circumstances weren’t so dire, and hit Chat’s staff out from under him. 
Chat’s laugh cut off in a yelp  as he fell toward the street. 
Somehow, he managed to land on his feet. 
Directly on the trap Exterminator had laid. 
Chat laughed as he straightened to his full height. “That’s the best you can do?” he asked before trying to move to retrieve his baton. He yelped as his upper body moved while his feet stayed stuck, firmly in place. He had to frantically windmill his arms to keep himself from overbalancing and getting even more stuck on the giant roll of fly paper he had landed on. 
“This city’s had a problem with alley cats for a while now,” Exterminator spat, “but this’ll show everyone that I’m the best Paris has to offer for pest control! Now it’s time to skin two cats with one stone…” Exterminator started to turn, and she dropped to the ground  and slid behind the cover of an overturned bus. “…and then I can move onto the bug-  where is she?” 
She took a deep breath as the akuma’s roars echoed through the street.
This was good. 
If he was busy looking for her, that would keep him busy while she freed Chat and waited for Ladybug to return. 
“Camouflage.” 
On silent feet, she skirted around Exterminator, giving him a wide berth as he scoured the street. By the time she made it over the Chat, he was still grunting and griping to himself as he tried to tug his feet free. 
“Give me your hand,” she whispered so as not to alert Exterminator to her whereabouts. 
Chat snapped his attention up to her—well, a bit to the left of her— and blinked. “What?” 
“Quiet,” she shushed him, casting a glance over her shoulder. Exterminator thankfully hadn’t heard Chat over the sounds of his search. “Give me your hand.” 
“I don’t need your help.” 
“You’re a sitting duck right now.” 
“I can handle myself just fine.” 
“That’s not the point right now. Now take my hand so we can keep him busy-” 
“Ladybug and I were fine before you showed up, I don’t need your help,” Chat spat. “Cataclysm!” The flypaper turned to dust under his touch as he smiled smugly in her general direction. “See?” 
“Found you.” 
She glanced up just in time to see Exterminator glaring at Chat- or rather, what would look like the empty air Chat was apparently talking to. She could see the akuma’s finger already squeezing around the trigger of his net-gun. Wordlessly, she shoved Chat to the side and then threw herself to the ground. 
The net whizzed harmlessly over her head. 
But it had been close. 
Too close. 
And now they were both on a timer… 
“Get out of here,” she hissed to Chat, “we need to regroup.” 
“You’re not the one in charge here,” Chat snapped as he sprang to his feet to dodge another net. 
“Sorry, that took longer than I thought.” Ladybug’s voice crackled to life over their com pieces. “I’ll be there in a minute-”
“We’re both on timers now,” she replied as she threw her bolas. Exterminator ducked out of the way as they whizzed past, visible the moment they left her hand. But that was fine, all she needed was to buy time for-
“Get out of there and recharge. Meet me on the roof of the Musée Yves Saint Laurent. I think I have a plan.”
                                                               ***
“At the very least, it will give me a chance to get up close and figure out where the akuma is hiding before- ” 
“I break it with my Cataclysm, and we save the day, bugaboo.” 
“How many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me that? And no, it’s not going to be that simple. This akuma is tricky.” 
That was an understatement. It was honestly surprising Shadowmoth hadn’t ever tried to akumatize an exterminator before. An akuma based around dealing with pests like bugs? That had Shadowmoth written all over it. 
“We need to get him out in the open, were he can’t lay any more traps for us.” Exterminator had proven himself to be a much better strategist that most akumas, and his proficiency with setting magically enhanced traps was a testament to the danger he posed. “We can’t let him catch us off guard again, we’ve had too many close calls,” Ladybug continued before turning to her. “Tigress, you’re going to be taking point on this. You have the best chance of leading him out into the open without getting caught. If we can get him to the Trocadero…” 
As Ladybug continued with the plan, the back of her neck prickled with the feeling of eyes on her. She glanced up from the holographic map Ladybug had pulled up on her yoyo to find bitter and venomous green eyes trained on her. 
                                                            *** 
Her lungs were still burning as she tried to catch her breath while Roarr scarfed down the last of her emergency candy. They has a couple minutes at most before they had to get back out there and rejoin the fight. 
She had managed to lead Exterminator to the Trocadéro, but she had had to burn through her invisibility. Ladybug and Chat were keeping the akuma busy and trying to identify the akumatized object while she recharged, but she didn’t want to be away from the fighting any longer than she had to.. Especially given it wasn’t just the fight with the akuma… the way Chat had kept interrupting and calling her nicknames she had told him not to while she tried to strategize… the tension had been so thick, she could have sliced it with her claws. 
The less time she left the two alone, the better.
“Just about ready?” 
“Almost,” Roarr said through a mouthful of gummies that were sticky and partially melted from the heat. Hopefully kwamis didn’t get cavities… 
As Roarr finished the last few bites of her snack, she rolled her shoulders to try and loosen up the joints and release some of the tension that had made its way into her muscles during the strategy meeting. Somehow, being chased through the streets by the akuma as she acted as live bait had been less uncomfortable that bearing witness to the brink of another spat between the two-
“Ready!” 
“Roarr, stripes on.” 
The magic of her transformation had barely washed over her before she was leaping up into the air, digging her claws into the brick of the back of the buildings lining the alley she had hidden in. Chips of masonry scattered and fell as she effortlessly clawed her way up to the roof. 
In a matter of minutes, she was back at the Trocadéro. 
Ladybug was a blur of red around the akuma as she swung and dove and rolled, never getting particularly close to the akuma. But she was certainly keeping him busy. A blur of black whizzed by the akuma, spouting more puns and flirtatious remarks in the same breath. Ladybug didn’t respond, but it was impossible to tell if that was because she was trying to concentrate or was just trying to ignore him. Or both. 
Either way, it didn’t matter. It was time for her to join the fray. 
She landed lightly, and then sped toward the akuma. She slide to a stop a few steps from Ladybug, swinging her bolas to deflect a net that had been heading towards her. Ladybug shot her a quick, grateful smile before springing back and out of the way and swinging up toward the top of the Palais de Challiot. A moment later, a shimmer of red and pink light burst out from the roof of the building. 
“I need you two to try and buy me some time while I figure out this Lucky Charm,” Ladybug’s voice crackled to life over the com links, “Chat, you’re going to keep him busy. Tigress, he can’t catch what he can’t see. You’re going to get the akuma, it’s in his dust-sprayer.” 
Of course it was. 
He had used it to try and douse them all in a foul smelling powder that had made her feel woozy when they first confronted him. Thankfully, Ladybug had been able to jam it with one of her previous Lucky Charms. But it was still intact. 
As she ducked under a net swung in her direction, she caught Chat glaring at her, bitter venom in his eyes.   
It was the same venomous look he had given her when Ladybug had given her the job of luring Exterminator to the Trocadéro.
She shook her head. There wasn’t time to think about that now. Now when there was an akuma standing right in front of her, aiming that stupid net gun at her again. 
She took off running towards the akuma, and at the last second, dropped to slide as he launched a net directly at her. The net flew harmlessly overhead as she slid past him, murmuring to activate her powers as she went past him. The second she was hidden right in front of him, she dug her claws into the stone to stop herself from sliding further and launched herself to her feet. 
Exterminator howled in pain, and she turned just in time to see him clutching his nose as Chat’s staff retracted. 
At least he was keeping the akuma busy. She wished he hadn’t gone straight to making the akuma angrier… but at least he was distracted. 
Now all she had to do was get in close and swipe the dust-sprayer. 
Moving as light as a feather, and as quietly as a tiger stalking through the forest, she crept towards the akuma. The akuma howled in frustration and then pulled his snare trap from his back before swinging it wildly. She hissed as she dropped to the ground, just managing to avoid getting beaned in the head by the erratically swinging weapon. 
“Don’t you know that cat always wins the game of cat and mouse?”” Chat called as he scraped his claws along the stone, loosening dust from the ground.  With a smirk, he flung it at the akuma. 
And her. 
She froze, a glare directed at Chat fixed on her face even though he couldn’t see it. What was he doing? Was he trying to derail the plan? But maybe the dust hadn’t settled on her. And even if it had, maybe the akuma wouldn’t see it-“ 
“There you are.” 
The akuma’s voice made the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. Without looking back to see how close the akuma was, she leapt straight up in the air with all her might. Something rushed through the space she had been occupying mere seconds ago before. 
She managed to twist in midair and kick off of the akuma, who had rushed forward and unwittingly placed himself right under her. With a little less grace than usual, she landed a few feet behind the akuma. Immediately, she sprang back up and darted away from where she had landed. The akuma was looking around wildly, even with his snare trap locked with Chat’s staff. As she darted to the side to look for an opening, she caught sight of Ladybug perched on top of the roof, a small red object in her hands and a look of horror on her face. 
Ladybug’s voice crackled to life in the coms. “Chat! What are you doing?” 
She glanced at Chat in time to see him grit his teeth and shove against his staff, breaking the lock he had been in with Exterminator and forcing the akuma back. 
Exterminator stumbled back, his free arm out to the side as he planted his snare trap to try and stop himself from overbalancing.  
She had a clear path to his belt, and the dust-sprayer on it. 
This was it. 
On near silent feet, she sprinted forward.
She reached out for the akuma. 
She was so close. 
“See, M’lady, it’s you and me against the world!” 
What?
“Cataclysm!”
Her eyes widened in horror as Chat’s hand erupted in a dark miasma as he lunged towards the dust-sprayer. 
Towards her. 
She dug her feet into the ground to try and stop herself. But she had been going so fast, it wasn’t enough to stop the momentum. 
Seeing Chat hurtle towards him, Exterminator dove to the side. Out of her reach. 
Out of Chat’s path. 
Leaving him hurtling directly toward-
She managed to throw herself into a clumsy roll at the very last second. It wasn’t enough to avoid the collision entirely though. 
Time felt like it was moving through syrup. 
Heavy boots knocked against her shoulders. Claws grazed across her back. 
Her heart stopped. 
And then beat again as she inched through the air, no searing pain running along her back. 
At least it hadn’t been his Cataclysm hand as far as she could tell.
But as she and Chat tumbled over and against each other, she felt her bolas swing up with her momentum. And then suddenly they were changing direction. Like they had hit something. 
Or been pushed by-
And just as suddenly, their weight was gone. 
And time doubled to catch up with itself. 
The impact of Chat hitting her threw her off kilter enough so that she landed heavily on her shoulder with a thud and a very uncontrolled roll before she skidded to a stop against the pavement. The impact was enough to knock the air from her lungs. 
But it could have been worse. 
Gingerly, she picked herself back up and turned. Just in time to see Chat dragging himself up from the ground. 
And Exterminator rushing right towards him, holding what looked like an oversized can of pesticide foam at the ready.  
Despite her protesting muscles, she rushed forward and shoved Chat—maybe a little harder than was necessary—out of the way of the foul smelling stream of toxic green foam.  
Exterminator barrelled past them. He started to skid to a stop, but then a familiar zip of a yoyo cut the air and the akuma was suddenly windmilling his arms. And then he fell flat on his face, just short of the pile of foam. 
Ladybug was a red blur as she dove off of the roof; she was beside the Exterminator in an instant, ripping the dust-sprayer from his belt brusquely. Even with her back to her, she could see the tension in every inch of Ladybug’s body. And- her hands were shaking as she clutched the dust-sprayer in one and the unused Lucky Charm in the other. 
Wordlessly, in one swift and sharp movement, Ladybug slammed the dust-sprayer down as she drover her knee up, snapping it with a loud and decisive crack that split the suddenly too-quiet air. 
The next thing she knew, Ladybug’s yoyo was capturing the akuma. 
But she was silent as she purified it. 
She dropped her invisibility as the white butterfly fluttered away. 
She watched as Ladybug pulled the akuma victim to his feet and offered him some quiet words. He nodded, and then, with an apologetic look cast in her and Chat’s direct, he hastily walked off. When she turned back to look at Ladybug, she had her Lucky Charm in her hands again. And she was staring at it. 
It was hard to tell from where she was standing, but it looked like an egg-timer. 
Ladybug stared at it silently. Until finally, she sighed. The moment Ladybug sighed, the timer began to ring, its sound shrill against the quiet. 
She watched as Ladybug took a breath, and then hurled it into the air as she cast her purification spell. 
The second the ladybugs disappeared, Ladybug turned sharply to face her and Chat. Her blue eyes were burning like ice as she approached. The burning ice flickered out of Ladybug’s eyes as they darted to her. “You ok?” she asked quietly.
She nodded. 
With a short nod of her own, the icy flames returned to Ladybug’s eyes as she drew level with her and Chat. 
“What,” Ladybug asked, her voice so quiet it would have been impossible to hear if not for the fact that the streets were still eerily empty in the aftermath of the akuma battle, “was that?” 
Ladybug wasn’t looking at her. Not even remotely. Her eyes were fixed directly on Chat. But she still took a half a step back form the weight of her voice. 
Chat audibly swallowed. 
“Well, I… I was only-” 
“What were you thinking? Throwing that dust?” 
“I was trying to blind him!” 
“And risk Tigress getting caught?”
“How was I supposed to know she would be there? She was invisible!” 
Awkwardly, she shifted her weight between her feet. Should she jump in? Should she say something? 
She had seen plenty of their spats firsthand, from the ones that were little more than bickering, to the ones that were full on arguments, which had become more and more frequent ever since she first received the tiger miraculous. But none of them had been…  
“It was the entire plan! I told you she would be in close range. You knew she would be trying to get the akuma! You knew she could have been caught in the crossfire!”
“I’m not her babysitter,” Chat spat. “Besides, she’s a big girl, she can take care of herself. You certainly seem to think so.” 
It was one thing to tell Chat how she really felt. But getting involved in a fight between the two of them… 
It was like watching a tennis match, the way they volleyed back and forth. Her gaze followed the trajectory of the fight with every spoken strike. 
“That isn’t the point. We’re a team.” 
“We’re partners!”
“And the way you just ignored the plan and jumped in the first chance you got? That’s what partners do?”  
“I was taking initiative. I was doing my job.”
“You were supposed to distract him!” 
“What? So she could do my job?” He flung his arm to gesture at her, almost hitting her given the proximity. 
Maybe she wouldn’t have a choice on getting involved… as appealing as standing and watching them argue was-
Before she could even so much as open her mouth, Chat continued. “I’m your partner. It’s been us from the start! And then suddenly you’re bringing in other people-”
“We need the help!”
“And you changed when you became the Guardian-”
“I never asked to be-” 
“You gave out another miraculous without asking me and you’re letting her keep one!” He gestured at her again. 
“We- I needed help!” 
“No you didn’t! You have me!” 
“No, I didn’t!” 
Chat stumbled back at Ladybugs words. Both of their chests were heaving, and their faces were the same scarlet as Ladybug’s suit. Tears glimmered at the corners of Ladybug’s eyes. She stepped forward, but before she could place herself between the two, before she could reach out to comfort Ladybug, Ladybug broke the silence. 
“I didn’t have you.” 
Ladybug’s quiet, broken voice took her back to her room on the Liberty. Back to her friend, sitting beside her on her bed, spilling tears over too many responsibilities for one person to handle. 
“Oh, Bugaboo,” Chat crooned, his furious face instantly softening, “of course you did. I’ll always be by your side, M’lady.” 
Ladybug’s eyes darted back up from the ground to Chat. 
“Frozer.” 
Chat’s brows furrowed. “What-”
“Glaciator.” 
With each name, Ladybug took a step forward. 
“Oblivio. Dark Cupid-”
“M’lady, what are you talking about?” 
“All the akumas where you’ve been more interested in goofing off or flirting. That, or having a snit because you were mad I don’t feel the same way.” 
“I don’t-”
“I needed help.”
“We beat all of those akumas!”
“Barely! And always by the seat of our pants, because you never listen to me.” 
“I listen!”
Ladybug let out an incredulous half-laugh before she drew herself up to her full height. She was still more that half a head shorter than Chat, but somehow, she didn’t seem to be. 
“Like you listened tonight?” Ladybug’s voice was quiet steel. 
“I- I- I…” she could see Chat floundering for something to say. Some way out of the grave he had dug for himself. “I did follow the plan!” She had to hold back a snort. Ladybug’s face morphed to pure incredulity. “I let her get the akuma to the Trocadéro! I was distracting it!” 
“And then you jumped in anyways when Tigress had an opening!” 
“I was being a hero!” 
“You could have hurt her.” Technically, he had. The suit protected her, but the fall had still hurt. “You could have Cataclysmed her!” 
“If she hadn’t been there to begin with this wouldn’t have happened!” Wildly, he turned to glare at her.  “This was your fault! You told me to step up! If you hadn’t-” 
“Chat! Stop. It.” 
“But Bugaboo, she told me to- if she hadn’t interfered-”
“Don’t ever talk to her that way.” Ladybug’s voice was quiet and even. And deadly. “Don’t ever talk about her like that.”
“Bugaboo-”
“Don’t. Call. Me. That.”
“But-” 
“You knew the plan.” Ladybug took a step toward Chat, the sheer weight of her voice was enough to silence him. “You chose to do your own thing.” Chat shrank back as Ladybug took another step. His face was stark white against the black of his mask, and it looked like the carpet had just been ripped out from under him. “You chose not to be part of the team.” She hissed, jabbing a finger into his chest. 
Ladybug looked like she wanted to say more, but she was interrupted by another beep from her earrings. 
“I’ll find you later Tigress,” she said, turning away from Chat curtly. Her voice was still still sharp, but it obviously wasn’t directed at her. And then with a flick of her wrist and the familiar zip of her yoyo, she was gone in a red and black blur. 
Heavy silence hung in the air. Everything was still; there was no breeze, no rush of traffics or people going about their evening. There wasn’t even the sound of any pigeons. 
It was like the world was holding its breath. 
Chat cast her an icy glare. He opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, she turned on her heel and darted into the shadows of the Palais de Challiot. 
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sprout-senior · 3 months
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having pots is so funny bc i will put a full teaspoon and a half of salt on One(1) egg and not think it’s over salted
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G’Kar: how would you describe salt to someone who’s never interacted with it if you can’t say “salty”?
Delenn: I would say salt is ionically bonded and crystalline, and to humans, is usually “sodium chloride” or “halite”.
Londo: salt has perfect cleavage.
G’Kar: …
Delenn: he’s not wrong, you know.
G’Kar: I think that’s what’s the most annoying about his statement.
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tj-crochets · 10 months
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I put a sticker on my new phone case! It’s from @lilaeleaf ‘s store
(I don’t know if the sticker is meant to be a reference to a specific something, I myself am just a salt goblin for medical “need more salt at all times” reasons lol)
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terracyte · 1 year
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impor tant final in t-5 hours oughfgogugh
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salted15 · 1 year
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rare moment when i actually post beads to tumblr
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morethansalad · 1 year
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Vegan Tamago Kake Gohan (Vegan Egg Yolk)
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arctic-hands · 10 months
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Remember when that post went around by that user who had issues with feeling sick when their blood sodium was low and they felt physically ill from it so they would just sprinkle salt into their hand and lick it until they feel better? And it was reblogged by chronic illness/disability circles until it was picked up by nominally healthy people who were commenting that wow this made me feel so much better after feeling like shit constantly, which PROLLY meant they also had low sodium issues. But then health freaks and normies got ahold of it and were reblogging in embiggened letters "NO NO NO! THIS WILL LITERALLY KILL PEOPLE! AMERICA HAS AN EPIDEMIC OF HYPERTENSION DO NOT LISTEN TO OP THEY ARE SO STUPID"?
Anyway my Crohnsy, vasovagal syncopeic, hypotensive ass is out of Lays ☹️
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Table salt offers a safe, inexpensive and reusable pathway to recovering useful products from plastic waste
Muhammad Rabnawaz, an associate professor in Michigan State University's School of Packaging and recent inductee into the National Academy of Inventors, has always believed that the most brilliant solution is also the simplest. That belief is reflected in his team's new publication in the journal Advanced Sustainable Systems. Rabnawaz and his colleagues showed that sodium chloride—table salt—can outperform much more expensive materials being explored to help recycle plastics. "This is really exciting," Rabnawaz said. "We need simple, low-cost solutions to take on a big problem like plastics recycling." Although plastics have historically been marketed as recyclable, the reality is that nearly 90% of plastic waste in the United States ends up in landfills, in incinerators or as pollution in the environment.
Read more.
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