#no steps between 30%-99% | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

multifandomimagin3s · 1 year

Text

Them as Dads - 141 + König

Requested by Anon

Fluff, hints of angst

Simon "Ghost" Riley

Simon's childhood was, to say the least, horrific.

No child should have had to experience when he went through.

Those experiences have stuck with him all his days, emotions buried deep down to a point where he doesn't feel them anymore.

There's a distinct divide between Ghost and Simon - and since he's considered legally dead, he has no reason to drop his mask anymore.

Needless to say, when he found out he was going to be a Dad, he short-circuited.

Didn't even say a word, and just left.

Of course he felt guilty for it, and he knew that what he did was wrong, but he needed to think.

The last time he had even been around a child was his little nephew...

And that tragic part of his past truly was the final nail in the coffin for him.

He was terrified of being like his own Father.

He did eventually come back but for the duration of the pregnancy, a cocktail of emotions swirled in his stomach.

The day he held his child for the first time, he was stunned.

This tiny little human, with their little button nose and - his eyes.

He grew angry - angry at his Father, and by extension the World.

How could anyone bring something so small, so fragile, so perfect any harm?

Needless to say, he's a very protective Father.

If any of the Team were to meet the baby, he probably wouldn't even let any of his comrades hold them.

Maybe Johnny - but that's at a push, and he'd be hovering around him the whole time like a shadow.

He'd be soft for his child - but he'd try to be the strict parent, teaching them to be ready for whatever the world may throw their way.

If he had a daughter, would let her paint his nails - would sit there still as a statue, watching with soft eyes at how her tongue stuck out of the side of her mouth in concentration.

Speaking of, regardless of the child's gender - boyfriends / girlfriends / significant others would absolutely be interrogated before they even step a foot through the door.

"Who the fuck are you?" "You're 16?? Cunt, you look 30!"

It would essentially be like that scene from Bad Boys 2 - Soap would definitely be Will Smith in that scenario, accepting no criticism~

Would try to be there for every life event and would feel a deep seated guilt if he couldn't because he'd been deployed.

Overall, from day one, he'd made a promise to himself that he wouldn't let history repeat itself - he'd give his child everything he ever wanted growing up and more.

Johnny "Soap" MacTavish

I can see him as a chill Dad.

He wouldn't let his child get away with murder, but he would be good cop 99% of the time.

Would absolutely spoil them rotten - they would have to so much as look at something they liked and he'd get it for them.

It would be his Mother that would have to try and get him to reign in the spending a bit.

Also carries the baby around in one of those baby carriers across his chest.

I think he has a big, close-knit family so the child would have a ball playing with all their cousins of mixed ages.

If he had a son, definitely tries to style his baby hairs into a little mohawk with gel.

Lets his kids express themselves however they want.

They want to dye their hair? He's driving them to the shops to get the supplies.

They want a piercing? As long as they're old enough, he's fine with it - and if they want him to go with them for moral support, he's already in the car.

I think the only think he'd be awkward about would be periods.

He'd try to be helpful...but he's not great at handling it.

C/N: Dad, I got my period.

Johnny: Oh - OH! Okay, that's - that's fine...ehh...do you...do you know what to do with it...or?

I can also see him just running into a shop in an absolute panic - asking the store clerk for assistance because he doesn't even know what he's looking for.

Returns home with three massive bags of supplies.

He'd be supportive with whatever they wanted to do in life - if they wanted to go to University, he'd help them with their application; if they wanted to get a job, he'd be helping them look for vacancies, driving them to their interviews; if they wanted to join the military however...he'd be reluctant, but he would never discourage them for pursing anything.

The only thing he'd have an issue with...is if his daughter got a boyfriend.

He'd not be as...hostile as Ghost, but the silent threat is always lingering in the air.

If anyone ever hurt his child, he can switch from fun-loving Johnny to Sergeant in the blink of an eye.

Captain John Price

That child has this man wrapped around their finger from day one.

Would give them the world if he could.

Would never smoke his cigars anywhere in the vicinity of them, and would hide them out of reach - especially during the curious toddler stage.

I can see him cutting up their grapes into smaller pieces, paranoid that they'd choke otherwise.

Has dozens of photos of them wearing his hat - even got them a toddler version of his own because they liked it so much.

Doesn't matter how old they are, they're still that little smiling baby in his eyes.

So needless to say, he's very protective.

Doesn't threaten potential partners - he doesn't need to, he's a Captain in the military, so nobody would be so stupid as to try and hurt his child.

Only brings the child on base when he knows that only people he can trust are there - ie. the 141 taskforce.

Follows the toddler as they waddle around, waving happily as they pass people - Soap ends up joining the little adventure since the little one took his hand and he didn't have the heart to let go.

Speaking of, despite not being given the official title, Soap becomes Uncle Soap the moment he claps eyes on Price's child.

Gaz too - he sent Price the photos he took of them wearing his sunglasses, a beaming smile on their face.

It came as a shock to everyone when they saw the child approach Ghost.

It even shocked Ghost when the child made eye contact with him - and didn't cry. Instead, they smiled, tugging on the leg of his trousers to be picked up. And, even more surprisingly, he did.

Price never has to worry about keeping his child safe - because god help whoever tried to hurt them when they have 4 highly trained SAS soldiers coming for them.

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick

He’d be one of those young, cool Dads.

Buys himself and the little one matching shoes.

Also matching outfits are the thing, especially during the toddler stage.

His kid would be the drippiest kid in the playground.

FaceTimes and calls home whenever he can when he’s deployed, seeing their little smiley face just makes his day so much brighter.

When he’s home he’s more than happy to spent chill days just watching cartoons with them on the couch, making pillow forts - he probably enjoys it more than the kid to be honest.

I reckon he’d struggle to actually parent the child, and would rather be their best friend than an authoritarian figure - ironic, considering he’s a Sergeant.

So it would probably be up to the child’s Mother to reign him in when he’s being a bit too soft or blasé.

Helps his kid build the best Minecraft house.

Loves being able to bring the child on base, showing them off to the Team.

Price secretly loves having the little one around, and they’re often found chilling together in his office.

Would absolutely spoil them - whether it be new toys, sweets or anything they wanted, he’d get it for them without a doubt.

Uncle Soap once spiked up the little one’s hair to match his own mohawk - Gaz wasn’t mad about it at all, and thought it actually looked cool as fuck.

If he had a daughter he would definitely sit down and learn how to do little braids in her hair.

Would also let her put little clips and bows in his hair, painting his nails to match.

He’d just be so soft for his child.

König

When the child was little, Konig was absolutely terrified that he would end up accidentally hurting them.

They were so small, barely even taller that his knee when he was standing, and all he could think about was what if he accidentally stood on their little foot or walked into them without noticing.

So, most of the time, he carried them around.

Would read books to them at bedtime, teaching them German and English to the best of his ability.

I don't think he'd wear his hood around them often, preferring his child to see his face rather than two eyes surrounded by black cloth.

Was genuinely surprised when they didn't cry after seeing him with it on; their little hand touched the cloth before breaking out into a sunny grin, "Dada!"

He probably cried a little bit after that.

He didn't have the greatest time growing up - so I think if his child ever got bullied, he would struggle to compose himself.

In his eyes, his child was perfect, so for anyone to go and make them feel bad about themselves - or worse yet, make them cry, it makes him see red.

Doesn't go and threaten the child - he'd not cruel. But the sight of a giant, masked man looming over all the other parents at school pick-up is more than enough to put the fear into anyone who had been picking on his kid.

Would probably teach them how to fight and defend themselves from a young age - he wouldn't always be around, due to deployment, so it gave him some peace of mind knowing that they would be able to defend themselves.

#simon riley #soap mactavish #kyle gaz garrick #captain john price #konig #call of duty #cod #multifandomimagin3s

558 notes · View notes

joblrcensus · 3 months

Text

it’s time for the JOblr census results 🧡🙌

before we start i want to thank everyone who took their time to answer this silly little project, gathering responses from 203 baby boos!! it’s my first time doing this so hopefully i can bring some excitement with the results <3

so buckle up and let’s get into it

general questions

Which continent are you from?

Unsurprisingly, the majority is European with a total of 80.8% but it’s amazing to see that they’ve crossed the continent’s border and we also have 9.9% people from North America, 3.9% from Australia & Oceania, 3.4% from Asia and 2% from South America. No person chose the Africa option.

Which country are you from? (optional)

With this being an optional question, 162 respondents out of 203 opted to answer it. Let’s take a look at the top countries by number of people in JOblr (small note: I counted the few people who wrote England or Scotland as part of the UK answer)

Drumrolls 🥁…..

Finland - 29

UK & USA - 15

Germany - 11

Poland - 9

Italy - 8

Australia - 7

Sweden - 6

Austria, Spain, The Netherlands - 5

Croatia, Slovenia - 4

Czechia, France, Romania - 3

Belgium, Canada, Denmark, Hungary, Lithuania, Norway, Philippines, Portugal, Ukraine - 2

Bolivia, Brazil, China, Estonia, Greece, Iceland, India, Luxembourg, Malta, Mexico, Russia, Switzerland - 1

How old are you?

45.8% of us are between 18-25, following by 23.6% between 26-30, 18.2% between 31-45, 10.8% under 18 and two people who are over 45 years old.

Are you part of the LGBTQ+ community?

Remember when they said Joker Out are for the girls and gays? 🏳️‍🌈

Well that was absolutely not wrong since 77.3% baby boos answered that yes they are part of the community, while 11.8% are questioning and 10.8% have answered no

tumblr activity questions

How do you participate on JOblr?

a majority of 98 people are mostly reblogging posts in the fandom but sometimes making posts of their own, 38 are only reblogging while 36 lurkers have stepped out of the shadow and made themselves known. The least amount of people (31) said to be active posters

Do you post any of the following?

It’s already known this fandom is mad talented and entertaining!! It’s always a joy seeing everyone’s creations and posts no matter the type. And the people who are only enjoying and supporting the content are just as important 🫶

Do you also post about Käärijä?

Since these two fandoms are basically overlapping, sometimes even seen as one fandom, I was curious just how much

50.7% also post about Käärijä outside of Joker Out, while 35% don’t post about him at all (or perhaps very rarely). 14.3% are mainly coming from Käärijä’s fandom

joker out questions

How did you find out about Joker Out?

Another unsurprising result, with 89.7% of us finding out about them through Eurovision. But it was really cool to see that there are people who discovered them differently. Ten people found out about them through Tumblr or other social media, to four they were recommended by someone and one through a music platform. The “other” option was chosen as well and included:

finding out about JO through Käärijä

through a music blog review

on slovenian radio

Who from the current members is your favorite?

One of the hardest questions but it had to be done

So Tumblr’s top favorite members areee:

Bojan - 69 votes

Jan - 42 votes

Kris - 40 votes

Nace - 35 votes

Jure - 17 votes

Have you been to a Joker Out concert?

I did not expect this one to be so balanced but I am pleasantly surprised! 104 people have been to a JO concert, while 99 haven’t. It often feels like you’re the only person who hasn’t seen them live yet but it’s nice to see that you’re not alone, so if anyone feels the same don’t worry our time will come too 🥹

If you answered yes, have you seen them multiple times?

Out of the 104 people who previously answered yes, there’s still a balance between those who have been to only one concert and those who have been to multiple

If you’re into RPF, which one of the most popular ships (according to AO3) is your favorite?

Another optional question where 181 out of 203 opted to respond to.

Oh boy, ooooh boy this was a tough battle. It felt like I was watching a horse race. I can tell you that all three ships have been at some point in the first place, or even equal. Are you ready to see the most interesting result yet?

Drumrolls again 🥁…….

BoJere - 58 votes

BoKris - 57 votes

Jance - 56 votes

The “other” option was also chosen and the following ships were included:

BoMartin

Jan/Jure

Kris/Jure

Nace/Kris

Nace/Jere

poly!JO

aaaand that’s it, you made it to the end 🫶 hope you enjoyed and why not see you on the next census!!

#sorry in advance for any grammar mistakes:))#joker out #bojan cvjetićanin #jan peteh #jure maček #kris guštin #nace jordan

139 notes · View notes

peachy-posy · 8 months

Text

Counting Steps (Vash the Stampede x Reader)

Summary: While traveling with Vash, you get a wound and decide to hide it from him.

A/N: Howdy! This is my first Trigun fic, please be nice hehe. This was originally written with Tri Stamp Vash in mind, but then it turned into me mixing him with 98 Vash, and so now we have this.

I'm considering making a little series about the reader and Vash because I am so whipped for this silly blonde man, the brain rot is insane. If that's something you'd be interested in lmk!

I hope you guys like it <3 ALSO this was cross-posted to my AO3

Warnings: Mild violence, mild blood/injury, fainting

Word Count: 2.5k

This was inspired by this quote from @creativepromptsforwriting: “When were you going to tell me you were bleeding? When you’re already dead?!”

98. 99. That’s another 100 steps. Start over.

You grit your teeth, clutching your side fiercely. Luckily, you are wearing black, so Vash hadn’t seen the sticky, dark stain appear. Your faithful traveling companion walks several paces ahead of you, leading the two of you to a nearby settlement. You couldn’t be that far away now, right? God, you hope not.

You lose your footing, stumbling briefly before catching yourself. White hot pain shoots through your abdomen, and you can’t stop the hiss that slides out between your teeth. Fortunately, Vash doesn’t seem to be able to hear it over the sounds of the wind. A bead of sweat rolls down your face, and you pause, allowing yourself to pant for a moment. Not for long, though. You have to keep moving.

Counting your steps in increments of 100 has been your method of keeping yourself focused. It was a simple task, something to devote all of yourself to for the time being. If you could keep going, one step at a time, you knew you could make it to the town.

17. 18. 19. That’s another 20.

Your mind wanders to the very situation that caused you to get an injury in the first place. What a mess today has been.

You have been traveling with the infamous Vash the Stampede for months at this point. Shootouts and run-ins with bandits and bounty hunters made for another Tuesday. Usually, that was no problem for you guys. You knew your way around a gun and could certainly hold your own, so what the fuck happened today?

30. 31. 32.

The two of you had stopped at a small plant you’d come across while traveling in the desert, thinking it was a good chance to take a breather. Little did you know, you were walking right into a stick-up, with a small group of bandits robbing a family that had stopped there as well. You and Vash stepped in quickly to help, easily incapacitating the bandits. Vash’s attention readily became focused on helping out the family, noticing that the oldest child had gotten a gash on the head.

Allowing Vash to handle the damage control inside, you had stepped back outside to catch your breath. You walked over to the side of the building, leaning against it and resting in the shadow it produced. Out of the corner of your eye, though, you saw movement. Apparently, there was another person involved that had slipped away. You sprung into action, running around the building to where you’d seen the figure disappear. After that, everything happened really fast.

The man was quick, and he lunged at you with startling speed. You were able to dodge the initial thrust of his knife towards your gut, but you didn’t sidestep fast enough, feeling the blade tear a gash into your side. The adrenaline in your system helped you to ignore the pain, and you whipped around, kicking the knife out of his hand and twisting his arm behind his back. Before he knew it, you had him pinned on the ground, arms pulled uncomfortably behind his back. Drawing your small revolver from its holster, you swiftly hit the back of his head with the grip, feeling his body go limp under you.

After he passed out, the tension left your body and you leaned back with a sigh. It was at this point that you started to feel the sharp, stinging pain radiating from your side. Glancing down with a wince, you moved your jacket aside, laying your eyes on the gash that had been so generously given to you by your friend here. Because you wore your jacket open, it looked like it had blown out of the way and been spared by the blade. So, at the very least, you wouldn’t be spending the evening sewing the jacket up. Your body was a different story, unfortunately.

It was a small, but deep, clean cut. It wasn’t anything worse than what you’ve had before. But, it would definitely need some stitches. You were almost positive you could patch this up with the first aid kit inside.

You released your jacket, heaving yourself off the ground with some effort, applying pressure to the wound. Once on your feet, you made your way back around front, finding the entrance to the small building.

Vash was crouched, chatting to the teary-eyed children, calming them down with a practiced ease that came from many years of experience around kids. He smiled at them, and said something that drew a giggle from the children. Their parents watched from nearby with grateful smiles, eventually pulling him into a conversation with them as well. A soft smile formed on your lips, as it often did when you saw him have these types of interactions.

Your pain brought you back down to reality though, and you grimaced. Your eyes scanned the room for the first aid kit, and you found it lying on a small table. You quietly walked over, and immediately grabbed some gauze to hold against the wound. You sifted through the contents, searching for the thread, knowing you definitely had some. It wasn’t until you remembered that one of the kids had gotten a cut to the head that you turned around, seeing the last of your thread stitched up in a wound already. Vash might be holding onto some more, but even if he were, it likely wouldn’t be enough.

Well. Shit.

You faced away from everyone again, trying to think of what to do. You were less than half a day’s walk from the next town. You didn’t have any supplies other than some gauze that would help. Telling Vash would worry him, and he’d definitely want to carry you the rest of the way, even though you knew his prosthetic had been causing him soreness recently.

You were just gonna have to suck it up and walk. You stuffed gauze into your pockets as discreetly as you could, before hearing your name called from behind you softly. You turned your head to the side, heart skipping a beat at seeing those gorgeous blue eyes gazing at you.

“Everything okay?” he asked quietly, concern creasing his brow. You wanted to reach out and smooth your fingers over it, not wanting him to worry about anything.

Instead, you gave him a convincing smile. “Yeah. I found another guy outside. We should probably tie him up with the others before leaving.” The person running the plant assured you both that they would be fine while they waited for authorities to arrive to take the men away. You made sure your body was angled to where he couldn’t see your bloody hand or the gauze.

He raised his eyebrows, surprised to have missed one, but ultimately nodded, letting you know he’d take care of it. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, Mayfly. I’m getting sloppy!” he joked, and you’d giggled in reply, heart fluttering every time he called that. It was just friendly, of course. Because that’s all you were - friends.

That’s another 60 steps. Or was it 70?

You jam your eyes shut, breathing through the worsening pain. You sigh defeatedly. You ran out of gauze an hour ago. The bleeding has slowed, but not fully stopped. Not with all of the pulling from walking. At least the sun is starting to go down, giving you a break from this damned heat.

You look up, seeing Vash’s back ahead, his red coat blowing gently in the wind. The distance is getting greater between the two of you. You’re starting to regret not filling him in about your situation. After noticing your silence not long into the walk, he’d asked once more if everything was all right. You smiled, told him you were fine, and that you’d tell him later tonight. He accepted that begrudgingly, giving you a Look, but had ultimately given you space.

You stop walking, your breathing uneven and heavy. Your vision wasn’t quite right either… had you really lost that much blood? The chill settling into your bones screams ‘yes’ at you. Vash is getting too far away. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

You feel your body trembling, and you close your eyes, a dull ringing in your ears beginning. Your grip on the gauze pressed into your side is getting looser, but you’re starting to care less. It’s not like it’s working anyway.

You are startled out of your thoughts by the feeling of hands gripping your upper arms. You gasp, opening your eyes, struggling to get them to focus for a moment. Once they do, you see Vash in front of you. His mouth is moving, and he looks worried. Oh. They’re his hands, you note, glancing at his arms.

The ringing in your ears subsides enough that you can hear his voice again. He’s calling your name.

“…you okay? What’s wrong?” He asks, searching your eyes.

“Huh?” You manage eloquently.

He sighs, closing his eyes, but he doesn’t let go of you. “You’ll be the death of me, Mayfly. What’s wrong?” He asks. “I know you said you’d tell me later, and, well, it’s technically later now, so…” he trails off, but his words have an expectant tone to them. This doesn’t really seem to be something he wants to budge on.

Not that you’re planning on withholding what’s happening at this point. You are almost certain you’ll pass out here soon.

“Um…” you start, averting your gaze. Finally, he seems to notice the way you’re holding yourself. Specifically, the placement of your arm, tucked into your jacket. His expression shifts into something more knowing, and he seems to have caught on.

He gently reaches down to pull your hand away so he can take a look, but as he does so, your knees buckle and you start a hard fall to the sandy ground. You shut your eyes, waiting for the impact that never comes, as you are wrapped up in a pair of strong arms before falling very far.

You are slowly lowered the rest of the way, and find yourself resting against Vash’s chest on the ground. He’s muttering something under his breath, and you’re murmuring an apology. He pulls your jacket back, sucking in a sharp breath when he sees the bloodied gauze.

“When were you going to tell me you’re bleeding? Once you were already dead?!” He asks, and yeah, you probably deserve that. He’s peeling back the gauze gingerly, scrutinizing the wound, concern etched into his gorgeous face. He’s talking, likely scolding you, but that annoying ringing in your ears is back, so you can’t hear him. You should not be thinking about how pretty he looks right now, but your vision is turning black and you don’t really care anymore. His head turns to face you, his eyes widening. There’s something in his expression you can’t quite identify.

But everything feels heavy, and you are very tired. You slump into his chest, closing your eyes.

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

The next thing you know, you are lying in an uncomfortable bed, tucked into itchy, white sheets. You groan, taking in how dry your mouth is and how bad your side hurts.

Oh yeah.

You open your eyes, sitting up with a gasp. You blink hard to clear your vision, but curl into yourself as pain shoots through your abdomen. You feel a set of familiar hands take you by the shoulders.

“Woah! Take it easy! Just take a deep breath for me, okay?”

You feel one of the hands move from your shoulder to rub your back soothingly, and you look up. Those beautiful blue eyes meet yours, relief flooding his features. Vash murmurs your name with a relieved smile.

“There you are. Are you okay?” He asks softly, gently pushing you to lay back down. You put up no resistance.

“Yeah, just a bit sore,” you manage, glancing down to your wound. You move your hand to touch it, applying pressure experimentally, but he moves your hand away, holding onto it instead. Like a worried friend, you remind yourself. You take a moment to glance around the clinical-looking room, and think you already know the answer, but ask anyway. “Where are we?”

His thumb moves slowly across your knuckles, just like a friend would do. In a friendly way. “The local clinic. We weren’t very far out of town when you passed out. I just brought you here right away. That was last night.” His expression shifts from soft to scolding, and he runs his other hand through his blonde hair. “You nearly gave me a heart attack! Don’t do that again!”

You offer a small, apologetic smile. “I’m sorry, Vash. We’d used the last of the thread for stitches on one of the children, and I thought I could tough it out.”

He stares at you, and you wilt a bit at his hurt expression. “Why wouldn’t you tell me though? We may not have been able to stitch you up right away, but I could have-“

“Carried me into town?” You finish, and he nods. You reach up, gingerly touching his prosthetic arm. His eyes widen slightly, not expecting your touch. “I know your arm has been bothering you lately, and I didn’t want to make it worse.”

His expression softens endearingly once more at your reasoning, the look he’s giving you making you fall in love with him all over again.

“Oh, Mayfly,” he murmurs, “let me decide what I can handle, okay? It wouldn’t have been so bad.”

You understand, but you also frown a bit at his words, raising an eyebrow at him. “But who looks after you? You have and would push yourself past every limit you have for the sake of someone else.”

He sighs, but doesn’t deny what you say, either. “How about we work on compromising a bit? We’ll look after each other, and make sure we aren’t pushing ourselves too hard.”

You try to level him with a stare, but end up relenting with a sigh and a smile. “Fine.”

He smiles back at you, mirroring your tone. “Fine.”

There’s a beat of silence, and it seems like something comes to his mind at that moment. His smile becomes something more like a smirk, and you regard him suspiciously.

“What,” you deadpan, somewhat dreading whatever he has to say.

He props his elbows on your bed, resting his chin on his hands, leaning forward.

“Nothing! I’m just flattered,” he replies, and you really, really don’t like the mischievous glint in his eyes.

“By…?” You ask, narrowing your eyes.

“I didn’t know you thought I was pretty.”

You scoff, rolling your eyes. Of course you do. But you’d never just say that.

“Yeah, right.”

“No really! You said so yourself! Remember? Something like, ‘I should not be thinking about how pretty you look-’”

You choke, blushing furiously. Oh my god. Right before you passed out. You must’ve accidentally said that out loud, delirious.

“I-I did not!” You sputter back, but you know it’s futile. He’s laughing too hard. You hate it, but even now, as he is laughing at you, you can’t help but love the sound of it. You’d do just about anything to keep him laughing and smiling like this.

He pokes your cheek, his laugh dying down. “For the record, I think you’re pretty too. ‘Specially when you’re blushing like this.”

Holy. Shit.

Never mind. You wish you had bled out.

#trigun #trigun stampede #trigun 98 #vash the stampede x reader #vash the stampede #vash x reader #vash x you #i love this man #peachy writes!

339 notes · View notes

kremlin · 8 months

Note

How DOES the C preprocessor create two generations of completely asinine programmers??

oh man hahah oh maaan. ok, this won't be very approachable.

i don't recall what point i was trying to make with the whole "two generations" part but ill take this opportunity to justifiably hate on the preprocessor, holy fuck the amount of damage it has caused on software is immeasurable, if you ever thought computer programmers were smart people on principle...

the cpp:

there are like forty preprocessor directives, and they all inject a truly mind-boggling amount of vicious design problems and have done so for longer than ive been alive. there really only ever needed to be one: #include , if only to save you the trouble of manually having to copy header files in full & paste them at the top of your code. and christ almighty, we couldn't even get that right. C (c89) has way, waaaay fewer keywords than any other language. theres like 30, and half of those aren't ever used, have no meaning or impact in the 21st century (shit like "register" and "auto"). and C programmers still fail to understand all of them properly, specifically "static" (used in a global context) which marks some symbol as inelligible to be touched externally (e.g. you can't use "extern" to access it). the whole fucking point of static is to make #include'd headers rational, to have a clear seperation between external, intended-to-be-accessed API symbols, and internal, opaque shit. nobody bothers. it's all there, out in the open, if you #include something, you get all of it, and brother, this is only the beginning, you also get all of its preprocessor garbage.

this is where the hell begins:

#if #else

hey, do these look familiar? we already fucking have if/else. do you know what is hard to understand? perfectly minimally written if/else logic, in long functions. do you know what is nearly impossible to understand? poorly written if/else rats nests (which is what you find 99% of the time). do you know what is completely impossible to understand? that same poorly-written procedural if/else rat's nest code that itself is is subject to another higher-order if/else logic.

it's important to remember that the cpp is a glorified search/replace. in all it's terrifying glory it fucking looks to be turing complete, hell, im sure the C++ preprocessor is turing complete, the irony of this shouldn't be lost on you. if you have some long if/else logic you're trying to understand, that itself is is subject to cpp #if/#else, the logical step would be to run the cpp and get the output pure C and work from there, do you know how to do that? you open the gcc or llvm/clang man page, and your tty session's mem usage quadruples. great job idiot. trying figuring out how to do that in the following eight thousand pages. and even if you do, you're going to be running the #includes, and your output "pure C" file (bereft of cpp logic) is going to be like 40k lines. lol.

the worst is yet to come:

#define #ifdef #ifndef (<- WTF) #undef you can define shit. you can define "anything". you can pick a name, whatever, and you can "define it". full stop. "#define foo". or, you can give it a value: "#define foo 1". and of course, you can define it as a function: "#define foo(x) return x". wow. xzibit would be proud. you dog, we heard you wanted to kill yourself, so we put a programming language in your programming language.

the function-defines are pretty lol purely in concept. when you find them in the wild, they will always look something like this:

#define foo(x,y) \ (((x << y)) * (x))

i've seen up to seven parens in a row. why? because since cpp is, again, just a fucking find&replace, you never think about operator precedence and that leads to hilarious antipaterns like the classic

#define min(x,y) a < b ? a : b

which will just stick "a < b ? a: b" ternary statement wherever min(.. is used. just raw text replacement. it never works. you always get bitten by operator precedence.

the absolute worst is just the bare defines:

#define NO_ASN1 #define POSIX_SUPPORTED #define NO_POSIX

etc. etc. how could this be worse? first of all, what the fuck are any of these things. did they exist before? they do now. what are they defined as? probably just "1" internally, but that isn't the point, the philosophy here is the problem. back in reality, in C, you can't just do something like "x = 0;" out of nowhere, because you've never declared x. you've never given it a type. similar, you can't read its value, you'll get a similar compiler error. but cpp macros just suddenly exist, until they suddenly don't. ifdef? ifndef? (if not defined). no matter what, every permutation of these will have a "valid answer" and will run without problem. let me demonstrate how this fucks things up.

do you remember "heartbleed" ? the "big" openssl vulnerability ? probably about a decade ago now. i'm choosing this one specifically, since, for some reason, it was the first in an annoying trend for vulns to be given catchy nicknames, slick websites, logos, cable news coverage, etc. even though it was only a moderate vulnerability in the grand scheme of things...

(holy shit, libssl has had huge numbers of remote root vulns in the past, which is way fucking worse, heartbleed only gave you a random sampling of a tiny bit of internal memory, only after heavy ticking -- and nowadays, god, some of the chinese bluetooth shit would make your eyeballs explode if you saw it; a popular bt RF PHY chip can be hijacked and somehow made to rewrite some uefi ROMs and even, i think, the microcode on some intel chips)

anyways, heartbleed, yeah, so it's a great example since you could blame it two-fold on the cpp. it involved a generic bounds-checking failure, buf underflow, standard shit, but that wasn't due to carelessness (don't get me wrong, libssl is some of the worst code in existence) but because the flawed cpp logic resulted in code that:

A.) was de-facto worthless in definition B.) a combination of code supporting ancient crap. i'm older than most of you, and heartbleed happened early in my undergrad. the related legacy support code in question hadn't been relevant since clinton was in office.

to summarize, it had to do with DTLS heartbeats. DTLS involves handling TLS (or SSLv3, as it was then, in the 90s) only over UDP. that is how old we're talking. and this code was compiled into libssl in the early 2010s -- when TLS had been the standard for a while. TLS (unlike SSLv3 & predecessors) runs over TCP only. having "DTLS heartbeat support in TLS does not make sense by definition. it is like drawing a triangle on a piece of paper whose angles don't add up to 180.

how the fuck did that happen? the preprocessor.

why the fuck was code from last century ending up compiled in? who else but!! the fucking preprocessor. some shit like:

#ifndef TCP_SUPPORT <some crap related to UDP heartbeats> #endif ... #ifndef NO_UDP_ONLY <some TCP specific crap> #endif

the header responsible for defining these macros wasn't included, so the answer to BOTH of these "if not defined" blocks is true! because they were never defined!! do you see?

you don't have to trust my worldview on this. have you ever tried to compile some code that uses autoconf/automake as a build system? do you know what every single person i've spoken to refers to these as? autohell, for automatic hell. autohell lives and dies on cpp macros, and you can see firsthand how well that works. almost all my C code has the following compile process:

"$ make". done. Makefile length: 20 lines.

the worst i've ever deviated was having a configure script (probably 40 lines) that had to be rune before make. what about autohell? jesus, these days most autohell-cursed code does all their shit in a huge meta-wrapper bash script (autogen.sh), but short of that, if you decode the forty fucking page INSTALL doc, you end up with:

$ automake (fails, some shit like "AUTOMAKE_1.13 or higher is required) $ autoconf (fails, some shit like "AUTOMCONF_1.12 or lower is required) $ aclocal (fails, ???) $ libtoolize (doesn't fail, but screws up the tree in a way that not even a `make clean` fixes $ ???????? (pull hair out, google) $ autoreconf -i (the magic word) $ ./configure (takes eighty minutes and generates GBs of intermediaries) $ make (runs in 2 seconds)

in conclusion: roflcopter

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯ disclaimer | private policy | unsubscribe

#frequently questioned answers

160 notes · View notes

kdero · 11 months

Text

After last summer's Supreme Court ruling in Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health Organization allowed states to ban abortion, urologists across the United States saw a dramatic surge in the demand for vasectomies.

Normally, vasectomy procedures peak towards the end of the year, but the mid-year Court decision led to an unexpected increase in demand in 46 states.

The greatest increases in patients undergoing this elective procedure were in states that implemented "trigger bans" severely limiting abortion access. These states experienced an average increase of 41% in vasectomy rates between July and September, compared to 26% in other states. States such as Arizona, Florida, Georgia, Tennessee, Texas, and Utah saw rates rise by more than 40%.

The post-Dobbs patients opting for vasectomies tended to be younger than the typical candidates. Data from Komodo revealed a small but consistent drop in the average age of patients undergoing vasectomies in the latter half of 2022.

Motivations behind this trend varied among patients. Some men expressed concerns about the lack of a reliable backup if their primary contraception method failed in the absence of abortion access, as vasectomy has a success rate of over 99%. Others were motivated by the fear that vasectomy itself could be outlawed next. Among this younger demographic of patients seeking to take control of their reproductive responsibilities were men who saw their decision as an act of solidarity with women.

Due to longstanding patriarchal constructs, vasectomy is viewed as a sacrifice for many men, involving recovery time and potential risks, along with misconceptions and concerns about its impact on masculinity. In reality, recovery time for this simple 30-minute outpatient procedure is 2-3 days, and there is no clinical evidence to support the notion that a vasectomy leads to a decreased sense of masculinity. The procedure does not have any direct physiological or hormonal effects on masculinity, sexual function, or masculinity-related characteristics.

In fact, by opting for vasectomy, men share the responsibility of contraception and alleviate the burden on women. By doing so, these men further embody the traditionally masculine traits of responsibility, self-reliance, decisiveness, and courage through taking an active role in family planning.

While the overturning of Roe v Wade has decimated women's rights in America, the increase in vasectomies following the ruling may be seen as a small consolation, a small step toward the long aggrieved concept of gender equity. As more men take proactive measures to dismantle the patriarchal idea that both conception and contraception are solely "women's issues," they act as leaders showing others the intrinsic value in the dignity and selflessness of their decision.

While our nation's leaders continue to restrict the rights afforded to pregnancy carriers, we are fortunate to have a younger generation of the impregnator class recognizing the devastating, often deadly effects of these laws and mastering the art of doing something about it.

For more information on vasectomies and providers in your area, visit plannedparenthood.org

135 notes · View notes

isamajor · 11 months

Text

Whumpril days 26 to 30

I’ve made it (I’m late, I know) but I did fill the 30 prompts of Whumpril ! :D

26 – Explosion

They hadn't seen the rune on the ground. Kaidan advanced at the head of the group at a good pace in these ruins until the explosion was triggered. One step inside the magical circle was enough, and everyone was brutally blinded by the explosion and thrown against the walls of the crypt. Kaidan felt his lungs suddenly emptied before he felt the painful bite of the stone against his back. The flames had briefly licked his face, leaving an abominable burning smell in their wake. His ears were ringing painfully. Everything around him was dusty and blurry. (98)

27 – Forced to kneel

All it took was a moment of inattention for a blade to slip under his throat. It had been recognized and some had acted on it. Caryalind could already count himself lucky that his throat hadn't been slit yet. The attacker asked him to keep his hands up and kneel down. The prince tried for a moment to defend himself before complying, the blade still pressed against his Adam's apple. What were they going to do, bind him up and bring him back to his father? Or torture him in order to make him pay for the faults of the whole Thalmor? (104)

28 – Semi-conscious

Taliesin muttered weakly, trying to say something. Gore told him to stay calm, cradling the Mer's long body in his arms. Stubbornly, Taliesin tried to move, in vain. He felt too weak to move his limbs which seemed to weigh a ton. He could only squeeze Gore's hand. His eyes fluttered. He didn't remember what happened to him.

« ...Where am I ? »

It was the only thing his furred lips could articulate. The Altmer could hear around him the buzz of the bustle around him, without understanding what his companions were saying. He felt weary, so weary... (99)

29 – Surrender

All that for a stray arrow that had mowed down a chicken in the town. The population had become hostile and a horde of guards was already running, swords out. The blows rained down and they defended themselves as best they could. Lucien squeaked "We surrender!!!" while holding his hands high, hoping for mercy from the guards. The others watched the scene apprehensively. Instead of politely apprehending him or letting him speak, the guards threw him to the ground, shoving him facedown in the mud. Seeing this, his friends saw red. Despite Lucien's protests, they violently attacked the guards. (100)

30 – Human shield

Before these Draugr, these ancient Nords reanimated by who knows what old magic and who watched over the secrets of Dragon priests, Inigo the Brave was nothing more than a terrified little kitten. These undead froze his spine, and the memories of receiving his facial scars from their withered fingers were still painful. Lucien stood between the Draugr's blade and his friend, like a shield, with glints of defiance in his eyes, chin high and fire magic in his palms. The scrawny blond Imperial was just as frightened, but he couldn't afford to show it: his friend needed him. (101)

•••

You can read all the drabbles I’ve made for Whumpril 2023 (and other prompts) here [x].

#whumpril #skyrim #skyrim custom followers #whumprilday26 #whumprilday27 #whumprilday28 #whumprilday29 #whumprilday30 #Kaidan #Caryalind thallery #Taliesin #Lucien Flavius #Inigo #explosion #forced to kneel #surrender #semi-conscious #human shield #knife to throat

30 notes · View notes

bratshaws · 1 year

Text

goodness gracious 101. brb x oc

a/n: GONNA PARTY PARTY PARTY TILL OUR PANTS FALL OFF!!!

check out the fic's playlist made by the sweet @wiipes !!

pairing: plus size!oc x rooster

warnings: 90s songs, Rooster has the hots for his wife ( shocker )

chapters:

1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11/12/13/14/15/16/17/18/19/20/21/22/23/24/25/26/27/28/29/30/31/32/33/34/35/36/37/38/39/40/41/42/43/44

45/46/47/48/49/50/51/52/53/54/55/56/57/58/59/60/61/62/63/64

65/66/67/68/69/70/71/72/73/74/75/76/77/78/79/80/81/82/83/84

85/86/87/88/89/90/91/92/93/94/95/96/97/98/99/100

(pls let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!!)

taglist: @mirandastuckinthe80s @roosterschanelslut @wiipes @lcahwriter @shrimping-for-all @gretagerwigsmuse @frenchtoastix

@lizzie-rdj @fanboyluvr @atarmychick007 @comebacktoearthpls

@peachiicherries @mak-32 @lizziespidiepridie @roosterswifey @ollyoxenfrees @piceous21 @sqrlgrl22 @hofficoffi @lexhalstead3 @lorilane33 @legendarydreamersharkparty @luckyladycreator2

@emilybradshaw @j-6o @louisahale @leobabbyyy @kulicny @winter-run @ktjmac @graciereads @bigpoppajes @taytaylala12

Beatrice feels the adrenaline pumping in her body when they get ready for the reception, just the two of them, inside a room where they could hear the cacophony of voices - she could swear that Shells’ voice was the one that always appeared more - looking down at her wedding and engagement ring, rubbing each band with her thumb.

Rooster, her husband - he was her husband now!- stood by the doorframe, with his hands in his pockets admiring her as she was kicking off her heels and putting on the more comfortable blue shoes, “You look so beautiful.” she looks up from her foot towards him with a smile, “Fuck you look so fucking beautiful. I love that dress.”

“I do too.” she grins, adjusting the shoes on her feet, “Want to know the best part?” Beatrice puts her hands on her waist, more like nudging her thumbs between the poofy skirt and he hears tiny ‘clicks’ as she pushes that tulle apart from her waist. He widens his eyes when the large skirt is separated, pooling at her feet revealing a more comfortable version of the dress - still long, still has a bit of tulle but it was more comfortable to move around - “I couldn’t believe it when the guys at the bridal shop told me, I love it.”

So did he because the way the fabric hugged her curves was making him drop his eyes every now and again. He looks over his shoulder to the door, to check if it was locked or not - the little keychain with the words ‘Mr & Mrs’ was on the keyframe - before he steps closer to her, “Gotta love modern clothing technology,” he didn’t even know if that sentence made sense, he was too busy following the curves of her body with his eyes, “We still have a bit of time, we just took the pictures.”

Beatrice narrows her eyes at him, a little smile on her face, “A little bit of time,huh? I wonder what you’d use this time for.”

“Well, I can’t use it for what I want,” he whispers, backing her against the wall, his hands on the flare of her waist, “But I can make do.” She couldn’t reply since his lips were on hers, Beatrice’s arms immediately wrapping around his neck, her back hitting the wall as his hands slid down her waist to her hips then back up, a soft moan breaking from her lips. He pulls back just enough to hover his lips on top of hers “Are you going to get mad if I mess your makeup?”

Beatrice’s soft laugh hits his lips, before she pecks him one more time, “Not too mad, I suppose,I can always touch up.” she replies with the tips of her fingers gently touching his nape, her cheeks flexing in a smile, “How long do we have exactly?”

“The wedding planner said around fifteen minutes.” he lifts his arm to check the time, “We have ten minutes actually, and you already changed into your other dress, baby.” he smirks, “Let’s make it five?”

“You are going to kiss me for five minutes?” she laughs, but then she remembers who her husband was, her cheeks reddening, “I can do five minutes.” and his lips were back on hers, his hands pulling the soft fabric of her dress up to her upper thighs so he could pick her up and wrap her legs around his waist. Beatrice tries to not muss his hair up too much, choosing to keep her fingers by his nape, all the while he kisses her deep enough to swallow all the air in her lungs.

His hand trails up and down her thighs, stopping when he feels something lacy touch his fingers. He breaks the kiss, dropping his gaze to her left thigh where his hand was covered by the fabric of her dress, pulling it just a bit higher until it exposes the light pink garter around it, “...oh.” he smirks, “Ooohhh,I forgot that this was a thing.” his lips return, but this time under her jawline, “I have to take it out with my teeth don’t I?”

Beatrice moans, but nods, holding his head on her throat, “L-Later though, Roos.” she says, her husband groans in response, trailing his lips up to her mouth again, she could feel his lips were smiling when he did so.

There is a knock on the door, the voice of the wedding planner saying they have five more minutes to go to their reception and Rooster had a smug look on his face, “See?Five minutes.”

She laughs, holding onto his neck as he drops her to the ground, helping her pull the dress down to her legs before she walks to the mirror, turning her head side to side, “Hm, it’s not so bad.” she says referring to her lipstick, “I always tell you that matte lipstick is hard to budge, but I can retouch it a little bit.” she laughs when he scoffs with a chuckle, watching her pull out the tube from her purse and spread the peach color over her lips.

When she straightens herself, running her hands through her hair and fixing the bangs that framed her face, she checks Rooster’s reflection with a little grin, “So, you ready?”

“I was born ready, gorgeous.” he says confidently, offering her his elbow as she steps closer, pecking her lips one more time, “Let’s get this party started.”

They walked down the stairs to where the reception was going to happen, they could hear the DJ announcing that the newlyweds were on their way - followed by a very loud ‘WOO!’ that sounded way too much like Shells’- with the two smiling at one another, Beatrice holding Rooster’s arm as the doors slowly opened to the sound of Shut Up and Dance With Me vibrating through the speakers.

The second they stepped inside the room, neither of them could hear the music anymore since the people around them just screamed in delight, clapped, whistled, Michael even hooted like a frat boy in his college game. It was magical, and crazy, and neither of them really could figure out where to look first.

They slowly made their way to the dance floor, the crowd parting like the red sea as they stood in the center as the DJ announced they were to have their first dance, the entrance song dimming until it was silence, “You ready?” he asks quietly, seeing that all the eyes were on them. Beatrice breathes out softly, but nods. The tune slowly starts, one of his hands on her waist while she has one of hers on his shoulder, their free hands clasped.

When they were deciding the playlist, Rooster told her that he’d want a surprise song, but one she’d like a lot. She was okay with it since everything else was already decided for, agreeing that she could be surprised at her own wedding.

That is until Elvis’ voice began to play on the speakers and Beatrice gasped, “...Roos…” she whispers.

“You said your nonna loved this song.” he says back, their cheeks touching, his lips curling into a smile against her skin, “And I think it sums up our relationship very well.”

Wise men say

Only fools rush in

Beatrice laughs weakly by his shoulder, trying her best to not to cry - again - squeezing his hand as they danced together, “You remembered.”

“I always do.”

Her eyes drop shut, a few tears falling down her eyes and wetting the shoulder of his suit, with a thankful smile on her face. How did she get so lucky? She recalled the feeling of their first date, having to hold onto him because the butterflies inside of her made it seem she’d just fly away, swaying gently with him in their wedding. She’s now Mrs.Bradshaw, she married Rooster. “Your cousins are giving us the stinky eye.” The comment breaks her reverie, making her turn her head to where she could see the triplets glowering behind their mom - who was busy filming the whole dance with a huge smile.

“Let them.” she says, keeping eye contact until they noticed and looked away, “They were invited, they’ll have to endure.” it sounded a lot darker when she said it, but Rooster just grins proudly, meeting her gaze. He just kisses her cheekbone, which in turn makes Beatrice smile at him, laughing sweetly when he twirls her on the dance floor seconds before the song ends.

More clapping follows, more people cheer - again Michael shouting like a frat boy - before they walk to the table where they’d sit - his groomsmen and her bridesmaids already seated - before mic is handed over to Rooster. “Thank you all for coming tonight.” Rooster says with a huge grin, “Thanks for my friends, my best friends,” he gestures to the dagger squad “For my uncle Pete,” the pilot in question smiles brightly, “Who has been…a driving force in my life for a long time and I don’t think I thanked him enough.”

Both pilots meet eyes, with the older of the two clearing his throat and wiping his eye before Rooster continued, “For Shells and Penny who were probably the main reason we are here together tonight–”

Shells cups her hand around her mouth “Took you two long enough!!” earning full blown laughter from the whole crowd.

Rooster chuckles, then turns his eyes to the Schiavonis, “To Bea’s family, who welcomed me in and…made me feel like I hadn’t in so long.” he met Rafael’s eyes, the older man’s smiling fondly at him as Claudia stood by his side, “And to Martha, who helped us organize this whole thing.” Beatrice’s aunt just held up her wine glass with a little knowing grin, her short husband next to her.

Beatrice then grabs the mic, “Your presence here is welcomed and so appreciated, we wouldn’t want anyone else here with us, celebrating and having fun just as we are.” she says, still holding his hand, “You all mean so much to us, you have no idea.” she turns up to Rooster, meeting his smiling face, “And thank you Bradley, for…marrying me.”

His gaze softened, he leaned down, kissing her forehead before his voice returned, “Thank you for marrying me.” He said gently, “You’ll never get rid of me now.” Another row of laughter peels from the crowd before he looks up, “Anyway, I think y’all are hungry and honestly so are we, so,” he chuckles, “Thank y’all again, really.”

He breathes out a sigh of relief once they are done, guiding Beatrice to her seat - the brunette complimenting the lavender stems on their table and the yellow roses on top of them - not letting go of her hand even after sitting down. “I’m starving.” he confesses after a while, making his wife giggle while rubbing the side of his hand, “I don’t even remember what we had planned…what did we have planned?”

“Um…” she picks up the thin menu by her side, “A mix of everything. We even got wood fire pizza.” she laughs, watching the servers walk into the room, “We did get a lot of Italian dishes, Roos.” her husband however was staring down a plate from afar, one that she noticed and then said, “Do you want to dig in?”

“Yes,please.”

She laughs, kissing his cheek and soon enough their dinner was served. She would sometimes look away from their table to check how everyone else was, if they were eating, if the non-meat eaters- such as her niece’s girlfriend - were munching away without issues. To her, even if it was her wedding, she wanted everyone to enjoy it the best they could.

She leaned on a hand, a little smile on her face as she watched everyone, darting her eyes to her bridesmaids and her family, then to the males of the Dagger squad and Pete who was seated alongside Penny. Rooster noticed, bringing his glass of wine to his lips and meeting her eyes, “What?” she just smiled wider, interlacing her fingers together to support her cheek on the back of her hand.

“I’m just looking at everyone.” she whispers, the chatter and soft music playing making it easier for them to talk without no one looking their way, “I’m glad most of my family could come,” she meets her Italian cousins’ eyes from across the room, giving them a wave when they greet her from afar.

Rooster lowers the glass, leaning back on his seat to take a look on his side of the room, which were mainly other Navy officers, smiling to himself, ‘I’m glad too.” he grabs her hand from the table when she drops it, kissing the back and interlacing their fingers as they continued dinner, “I’m just happy you are happy.”

Beatrice tilts her head in his direction, her cheeks taking on the rosy hue as she giggles, leaning closer to him to kiss his lips “I’m ecstatic, Mr.Bradshaw.”

His pupils enlarge and constrict with the feeling of her lips still on him, “Good,Mrs.Bradshaw.” he coos, “Very good.”

Eventually there’s the time for the toast and the speeches. Both Bradley and Beatrice watched with glassy eyes at the words of Mav,Shells and Beatrice’s father. They weren’t long, but they were from the heart - and Shells had to pause at least twice to finish her own, with Evelyn coming behind her to rub her back soothingly. They played the shoe game for a little bit in the middle of the dance floor until it was time for the parents dance.

Now, Beatrice looked at Bradley with a small grin, “You ready?” he nods, standing to his feet as Beatrice walks closer to her father, watching her husband approach her mother who was seated next to Sabrina. From afar she saw her mom’s smile turn into surprise, one of her hands coming up to her chest as she stared up at the pilot, then at Sabrina who nodded in agreement, then to Rooster’s hand as he held it out to her.

Her mother looks shocked and yet extremely honored at the same time. Beatrice smiles, watching him gently lead his mother in law to the dance floor just a few meters away from where Beatrice and Rafael were, ‘I wonder if she thought I wasn’t being serious when I told her.” she whispers, holding her father’s hand “She looks so surprised.”

Rafael's hummed laugh seemed deeper with how amused he was, “You know your mother,” he begins just as Landslide by Fleetwood Mac started playing, “She gets forgetful when too excited.” He smiles, “You look beautiful,tesoro mio.”

“Grazie, papa.” she smiles back, her cheeks reddening, “You look very sharp yourself.”

“Why,thank you, I do try my very best.” he spins them around the dance floor, “Do you recall when you were younger, maybe six or seven and we danced to Beauty and the Beast?”

Of course she did, her father had just came back from work and Beatrice was watching the VHS tape in the living room. He came home just in time to see the dance and Beatrice looked at him with those big eyes, asking him without words if they could do that. He ignored his back pain, ignored the long hours at work and danced with his daughter in front of the tv, “I do.” she whispers, “I think it was training for this time, don’t you think?”

“Well,I did dance with your sisters before but…yes,I believe it was training.”

Meanwhile, Claudia and Bradley had a little conversation of their own, “Oh,bambino,I’m so honored.” she says quietly, smiling up at the young pilot just like a mother would: proudly “I truly am honored to be doing this with you.”

“I should be the one saying that,ma’am.” he replies, gently leading Claudia through the dance floor, “You are my wife’s mother and…and I felt very welcome in your family.”

Claudia tilts her head much like Beatrice does, the motherly gaze never faltering, “Oh, bambino, you are such a sweet boy.” she cups his face so she could kiss his forehead, “You are very welcome to be in our family, we love you very much. You make our tesoro so happy, Bradley.”

Bradley in turn drops his head sheepishly, his eyes moving to where Beatrice is currently dancing with Rafael, happily laughing at something her father said, “She makes me happy too.” her eyes turn to meet his, her own smile widening, “A lot.”

Claudia looks at the scene with her heart fluttering, “You two are precious.” she says quietly and as soon as the song comes to an end, she kisses his forehead again, gently wiping the lipstick on his skin before she hugs his taller frame, giving him a warmth and love he hadn’t felt in a long time and he earned for it every day ever since his mother passed.

She left the dance floor with Rafael, both saying they needed a ‘break for the old bones’ and that the two should enjoy themselves. Beatrice’s presence was felt before he could turn to face her, her smaller hand cupping his as her chin propped on his shoulder. The party playlist being played made people stand from their seat and wander into the dancefloor, with Bea and Rooster staying in the middle, “So,Mr.Bradshaw,” again his pupils enlarged, “May I have this dance?”

One Republic’s I Ain’t Worried echoed around them as he grabbed her hand, “You may,Mrs.Bradshaw.”

There was something so pure and fun about having a bunch of adults singing 90s songs to their hearts’ content such as Baby Got Back and Wannabe, with the youngest generation looking either confused or dancing along.

The girls’ sang their hearts out once Kim Petras’ Malibu started, Carmen putting Jennifer on video call so she could join as well - she couldn’t come since she had another wedding to go to in Canada - with the youngest of the group dancing in the middle of her family’s bedroom. Beatrice kicked off the blue shoes, deciding that it was much better to dance barefoot while Rooster removed his suit jacket, smiling when Jolene suddenly joined the celebration, confused yet very happy to be there, being danced by her front paws by Payback..

They did sing along together to I’m Gonna Be 500 Miles by The Proclaimers, with the Scottish accents and all, in the middle of the dance floor. And Rooster did amazing while dancing to Footloose, which shouldn’t be surprising.

It was incredibly fun, fun to the point they were no longer sure what other songs were there since everything became a cacophony of laughter and singing, with pretty much everyone joining in - with the exception of the triplets. The three women were still glowering at their table, a mix of jealousy and shame on their faces every time they looked at Beatrice and Rooster.

Eventually Beatrice had to go to the bathroom, her husband wanting to go along with her but he was held back by a partially sober Coyote, telling him to dance with him. Beatrice just gave Rooster a small smile, telling him she’d be right back. Shells however, followed her to the bathroom instead, wearing neon pink colored glasses, snapping her fingers to J Boog’s Let’s Do it Again.

Her blonde friend managed to twerk her way into the bathroom, waiting until Beatrice was out and only stopping - literally stopping with her hands on her knees and ass tilted to the left - when three figures stepped inside. “Oh.” Shells knew those three, Beatrice told her about them, “‘Sup?”

The trio ignored her, crossing their arms, “Beatrice, we need to talk cousin.” the sound of Melinda’s voice was muffled by the sound of the toilet being flushed, then Beatrice walked out - as serene as she could be - making her way to the sinks, “Beatrice.”

“Yes?” she drawls, squirting some liquid soap into her palms, giving her cousins a look, “What is it?”

But the triplets deflated, for a second, “You invited us to humiliate us.” Beatrice pauses, arching one eyebrow as Shells stood up behind her, “You said at aunt Martha’s wedding that no one liked us, then why would you do this? It’s humiliating!”

Beatrice stayed silent, moving her hands to the hand dryer on the wall, turning them front and back,”You are not going to get me mad tonight, Melinda.”

“I–”

“You are not.” her green eyes seemed like daggers digging into her cousins, “Do not make me regret inviting you here.” Shells wasn’t sure what the trio thought it’d happen at Beatrice's wedding, but they were just staring at their cousin with their eyes wide,”Go outside, enjoy the party.” It was an order disguised as a suggestion, one that makes the three women stare at one another.

They didn’t seem to move, so Shells - being Bea’s crazy best friend and maid of honor - stepped forward, lowering the neon pink sunglasses to her nose, “I think the bride told you guys to have fun.” she says, tilting her chin up, “And such,” she makes a ‘shoo’ motion, “Go on,have fun.”

The triplets looked absolutely gobsmacked, before once again deflating and walking out of the bathroom - humiliated yet again. There’s a silence that surrounds the bathroom area, the maid of honor and the bride meet gazes, then a sputtered laugh breaks from both of them, with Shells almost doubling over and Beatrice having to support herself on the sink, “Ohhh, my God.” Beatrice giggles, pressing the back of her hand against her forehead, “Fuck, that was funny.”

“It sure was, anything to see those fuckers looking like shit.” Shells chuckles, checking her reflection on the mirror, running her fingers through her blonde hair, the curls she had done earlier that day were slowly going back to her normal hair texture because of moving so much and sweating so much, “Anyway, how are you?”

“I’m fine.” Bea says after giggling a bit longer, “I’m…fine…I’m more than fine,” she wiggled her ring finger, “He put a ring on it.”

“Beyoncé would be proud.”

They laugh a bit more until they hear a knock on the door followed by Rooster’s deep voice, “Babe?Are you okay in there?” Shells gives Beatrice a knowing look, popping her fake sunglasses up to her eyes again and then walks out, patting a surprised Rooster on the cheek, dancing her way past him towards the dance floor as Beatrice approaches her husband, “Hey, you okay? I saw your cousins.”

He turns his head to where the triplets were seated, looking absolutely defeated while their mother was too busy dancing with Carmen and Coyote to pay attention to them, “Yeah, I’m fine.” she smirked in triumph, meeting his eyes when he faced her again, standing on her tiptoes to kiss his lips, “Promise.”

“Mm,I know you can handle yourself,” he mutters on her lips, “But I still worry.” Beatrice grins, draping her arms around his neck, gently caressing his nape and the freshly trimmed hair there.

“I know Roos.” she says sweetly, kissing his lips again, “And I appreciate it a whole lot.” she interlaces their fingers together, taking him back to the dance floor where they spent another while enjoying the throwback songs until it was time for the cake.

The cake, a chocolate cake with hazelnut chocolate filling, was delicious - both of them couldn’t help but smear some of the filling over their faces - before it was served to the guests. In the meantime, the bride and groom leaned against the wall on the back of the main table - after wiping their faces - enjoying the atmosphere and watching Michael dance with Bianca in his arms as the two shared a slice of cake since Leo had to stay with Cynthia “Pretty good huh?” he asks, smiling down at her.

Beatrice grins, “Pretty great.” she sighs softly, chewing the soft cake with the voice of Debbie Harry echoing on the speakers, “Did you ever think you’d see Cyclone dancing with his wife?” the vice-admiral in question was indeed dancing with his wife, before he turns to Evelyn who immediately waves her hands negatively but her parents just bring her to dance together.

“Never in this lifetime.” he laughs, licking the side of his thumb to clean the filling, “But there’s a first time for everything.”

“Yep.” she smiles, then looks down at her bouquet abandoned on the table, “And you want to know something else?” she gently sets the plate down, “It’s time to toss the bouquet, wanna bet that Evelyn will avoid it like the plague?” she gently unwraps the locket from around the flowers, kissing it and handing it to her sister.

“Oh I’m sure of it.” he laughs, “I’ll count how many of them push each other.”

Beatrice giggles, before it’s announced it’s time for the bouquet toss. Immediately every head turns towards her as she wanders to a spacious part of the venue, the sound of scraping chairs and people almost falling on each other making her smile. She turns around, almost not believing the sheer amount of people - not only women - interested in catching the bouquet. She sees Evelyn in the far corner, with her mother pushing her forward until she stands close to the line of eager soon to be newlyweds. Beatrice gives Rooster a surprised smile and her husband shrugs with a grin, still eating his slice of cake. “Alright!” she shouts, turning around so her back faces the group, “On three!”

One!

Two!

Three!

She lets the flowers go, they twirl in the air and there’s a mix of ‘no! i got it!’ and shrieking that makes her turn around, only to see the flowers bouncing by each hand like it was a volleyball. Some of her Italian cousins - from both sides - and a few Navy officers were very eager to grab it…that is until it immediately leaned on Evelyn who was too busy telling her mom to back off to prevent the bouquet from falling on her chest. She grabs it out of habit, forgetting what it actually was.

However when she does notice it, her eyes widen and she looks up at Beatrice, then at her parents - her mother looks ecstatic…her father,well, not so much - then at Jake who just lost all color in his face, “No,can’t I give this to someone else??” Shells smirking face appears on her side, followed by Halo holding up her phone.

“No,no, no, Simpson, you touch it you get it. That’s the rules!”

Evelyn looks back at Beatrice for help but the bride just shrugs, walking back to meet Rooster only to drop her mouth in surprise, “It literally landed on her! She couldn’t even avoid it!” she laughs, looking back at her friend whose frown softened a tiny bit as Jake walked up to talk to her, “Well…it doesn’t mean it’ll happen now, right?”

“Well not now, but soon.” he winks, “You’ll see, we’ll be invited to their wedding soon enough.”

After the cake and bouquet toss, there was even more dancing. Dancing that went through the night, dancing that made her Italian relatives go crazy the second that Louis Prima started playing. From the corner of her eye she could see Nat and Umberto dancing together, with her Italian cousin’s face as red as hers whenever Rooster was around before their relationship was official.

It was cute, because Nat was laughing and helping him dance with her, even spinning around him. She had a feeling there’d be more weddings in the near future.

Eventually it was time for the last dance, which meant it was already past midnight. Beatrice looked up at Rooster with a grin, the sudden piano beat immediately making his eyes shine, “You shook my nerves and you rattled my brain!” they sang together, “This type of love drives a man insane!”

“You broke my will!’ more people joined in.

“But what a thrill!” even more.

“Goodness gracious great balls of fire!” Much like at her aunt’s wedding, the voices singing along almost made the building vibrate. They couldn’t see it, but Maverick was watching the two with a tear in his eye, one he quickly wiped away as Penny rubbed his arm fondly, placing her chin on his shoulder as they watched the kids sing together.

It was a great way to end the night.

#bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster bradshaw #bradley bradshaw x oc #top gun maverick #bradley bradshaw x reader

93 notes · View notes

pickledbugs · 4 months

Text

stats

hw/sw - 55kg // 121 lbs

lw - 47.8kg // 106 lbs

cw - 50 kg // 110 lbs

gw1 - 50 kg // 110 lbs

gw2 - 47 kg // 104 lbs

ugw - 45 kg // 99 lbs

——————

height - 175 cm // 5’9”

bmi - 16.3

================

rules

always skip breakfast

meal only allowed between 12:30pm - 7:00pm

no more than 1000 cals a day

drink at least 1L of water a day

5,000 steps minimum per day

if a binge occurs, NO PURGING. exercise as many cals off as possible instead.

if for some reason more food is needed after a meal wait at least 10 minutes before getting seconds and drink lots of water while waiting.

try to stick to omad (only exception is if family forces a second meal).

no eating at school (only exception is if friends get concerned, bring very low cal snacks for lunch the next day).

if craving a food, wait a few days first.

================

goals

exercise 30 minutes a day.

walk everywhere when possible.

fast as long as possible when family is away.

don’t binge again!! fulfil cravings with small portions (eg. if craving junk food have a little then give the rest away to friends/family).

finally lose the weight - stop gaining it back every month.

#ed not ed sheeran #tw ed diet #disordered eating thoughts #ed not sheeren #tw disordered eating #starv1ng

4 notes · View notes

bandmafia · 4 months

Text

"Marching band isn't that hard! You're just walking around! In [insert sport] we have to actually run around and throw things!"

You spent maybe 4 hours a day practicing something that will be shown off, again and again, in heats, quarters, periods, divisions, whatever.

We get one chance to show off a specific set of skills before we're sent back to the drawing board. We don't get heats or innings. If we mess something up we don't stop in the middle of the comp, take a 5 minute break on the sideboard, and devise a new strategy. If it happens it happens, and there's no going back. If we make even one mistake it could be difference between a 98 and a 99, and guess which one gets to move on to finals from prelims? And no, the band with 98 is not second place. Second place has a 98.971. The band with the 98 score is 7th.

Moreover, most of you are practicing on the field or in the gym. Where are we practicing? In the parking lot. In a rented space meant for horse racing. On the literal street. In a park.

If any of us get injured while playing, esp during a parade, we can't just step out like football players. Nosebleed? Angle your nose as far away from your uniform as much as possible and keep going. Stomach ache? Ignore it, play through the pain. Step in a gopher hole and twist your ankle? Limp your way to the end of the street. Trip over a hump and your foot looks the wrong way around? Hop on one foot and get over it. The most rest you're going to get is not playing for eight bars before guilt overtakes you and you start playing again.

Most schools with marching bands practice everyday for up to 5 hours. If not that, then it's all day weekends from 9 to 9. Sometimes it's both. Sometimes it's do school for 6 hours, do band for 5 hours, do homework for 3 hours, and sleep for zero hours. Then you finish homework on a Friday night/early Saturday morning, pack your bags, and go straight to an all-days.

Band warmups! Let's talk about those! Most bands run laps. Some make members do pushups. Sounds easy, right?

There is usually no break between warm-up and visual/sectional. Right after warm-up you're either running to the sidelines to put your instrument together and run up seven flights of stairs to get to the rehearsal space, or you're running to the front to get ready for fundamentals/field time. The water is right there, but the staff won't let you get it. You just ran 10 laps and now you need to carry your mellophone, your stand, your backpack, your case, and your music somewhere else. You just did 100 pushups and now you need to run to the truck on the other side of the street to get out the props and help drumline with unloading. You just did both laps and pushups and now you need to powerwalk backwards on your toes without falling over carrying a metal tube wrapped around you. The metal tube weighs almost more then you.

Carrying a football is easy. It's a leather or plastic thing that weighs maybe a package of grapes. If you hold it up to throw it you can keep it up there for probably forever. Carrying literally any instrument while keeping an angle is an actual pain. Try carrying a marching tuba on your shoulders with the bell facing up. Your back isn't allowed to curve to accommodate for the weight (it isn't healthy for your spine either) and you aren't allowed to fall over backwards because ow for you and your instrument. There's 30 pounds of metal worth nearly 5000$ resting on one shoulder. Your life value pales in comparison to that. Or how about we take a flute, at the opposite end of the weight scale. Light, 2 pounds at most and not even that. Seems easy right? Try carrying a horizontal stick with buttons at a 90 degree angle corresponding to both your face and the ground while lifting it 10 degrees higher and your fingers splayed out like a piano player.

"Well on the field we have to pay attention to the people around us so we know who to pass to and where to score!" Good for you! We have to pay attention to: - The drum major(s) - Other people around us - Our tone production - How loud we are - The band director - Our feet - What notes we're producing And we also have to remember where we're going (If I go right and I'm supposed to be going left, I will be the cause of a multi-million dollar pileup) and what note's we're playing (nobody wants to listen to a horrible band. Duh).

Also, marching band camps? This isn't the cushion-y, in a main cabin the forest hosted by Christian counselor Concert band camp we're talking about. This also not the 'training center for [sport] that our coach makes us go to every year'. This is all days. Every day. For weeks. In the summer. When it's 104F and climbing. This is the camp where everyone wakes up at 4:30am, makes it to the sports center at 5:45am cramming their lunch of oatmeal bars down their throat, and doing the exact. same. thing. for upwards of 12 hours. Sometimes, it's leave home at 5am and come back home at 9pm. At that point you are literally returning to marching band after home. And this happens every day for maybe 4-9 weeks.

Like I'm not saying it's a sport in this post specifically, but what I am saying is that marching band isn't easy. Watch DCI (marching band NFL). Watch WGI (DCI for guard). Marching while playing is one thing, running sideways while playing is another.

#band mafia #band kids #marching band #band #concert band #band kid thoughts #bandmafia

5 notes · View notes

firelightfables-arc · 1 year

Text

baby brother @supermantm is the best of them,

the spam of impatient texts ceased over 30 minutes ago and by the time clint and barney finally get back to the apartment, kon is hovering a few inches off the couch, curled up and asleep.

probably the first time anyone's ever witnessed superboy taking a nap, but he looks soft and cozy and impressively quiet.

barney’s pretty sure he never knew that after 99 messages your phone gave up and added a plus on the end. he’d never gotten over a handful of texts before, certainly not within such a short time frame, and he’d feel annoyed if he didn’t have a hunch as to just who it was blowing up his phone.

if he was honest, he was a bit surprised kon hadn’t just appeared in the store doorway. yet no flurry of shouts, selfies, or screams had heralded superboy’s arrival. hence the texts, he assumed.

clint met him at the bottom of the stairs with a grin, take out in hand. enough to keep the avenger’s hands full and that was always a hallmark of a barton brother get together. more food than should be humanely possible to consume.

(no, he still didn’t count the plastic utensils as edible, kon-el, stop bragging about it.)

“you get a text?”

and barney snorted. “a few.”

clint just grinned and they took the stairs casually. half expecting to hear the tv on and kon humming or talking or making that distinct sound he did when he was bouncing off the walls of the tiny apartment. yet the hallway to barney’s place was uncharacteristically quiet.

frowning a bit, barney opened the door...and stumbled when clint ran into him. “barn, everything-” clint trailed. “huh.”

barney had to look twice to make sure kon was breathing.

but there was the rise and fall of chest. kon in gentle, peaceful sleep. like the world was quiet and looking so very, very much his age even as he floated a good few inches off the sofa. carefully, barney set his own bags down. eyes wide, not daring to breath, and behind him he could hear clint open his mouth then shut it again. a feat of impressive proportions; to silence his brother.

glancing over, barney made a gesture and clint shrugged, helpless, unsure, though certainly not alarmed. just. confused.

it felt...wrong, however, to try to wake kon.

like they were both viewing an eclipse, of sort. sun hidden behind something that only ever came around a few times a year, if at all. and for a moment it felt like they’d achieved something, to be trusted like so.

"you think he’s ok?” clint asked.

barney moved, sliding the blanket from the back of the sofa over kon. letting the edges drape over kon’s form. “yeah. I guess he’s just...”

“asleep.”

“yeah.”

“it’s...kind of weird. but also...?”

“yeah.”

stepping back for a moment, neither was quite ready to move. until the smell of take out reached them both and with a suddenness, they both moved. quietly letting kon sleep as they whispered in the kitchen, eating over the counter and signing in between bites.

#supermantm #( visage : clint barton )#( visage : barney barton )#dyn : if the sky comes falling down; for you; there's nothing in this world we wouldn't do ( supermantm )#( I couldn't queue it I needed it out there now... )

14 notes · View notes

robin-nightwing-agent37 · 2 years

Text

You know 99% of all Nightwing fan’s problems can be fixed by literally allowing Dick to grow past his previous editorial decisions and allow him to explore new friend groups, new love interests and create his own unique family. That way we continue the trend of Dick growing into a better more stable person while looking back fondly on the stepping stones that got him there.

This constant relying on stories, love interests and side characters that debuted like 20-30 years ago has got to end. It’s literally turning the fandom into something so toxic that even I considered leaving Nightwing. Pandering to nostalgia gets you nowhere. Let Hollywood show you how well pandering is looking for them! The MCU was successful because of NEW content!

Both Marvel and DC have a history of their best content being content that is new and novel. Batman didn’t get popular until he underwent multiple major changes. The Batman today isn’t the same Batman as he was 20-30 years ago. So why is it that Nightwing is the character where he has to repeat his greatest hits instead of growing past it.

We say we want Nightwing to be Alist and that we want Nightiwng to be up there with Superman or Spider-Man, but then at the same time we don’t allow him to have any other friends, stories or love interests outside the titans or Batfam. And now it’s become a war between both franchises. Dick can’t even get stable elseworld content. He was with both Kory and Babs in Future state, main continuity and in DCAU all so they can appease the fandoms. It’s ridiculous.

Young justice was a breath of fresh air before that got overtaken by fandom demands. You know for all the problems the Batman Arkham Games had, it probably for me had one of the better representations of Dick because he simply got to be Dick Grayson. No ties to anyone but Batman and Robin. That’s what I want. I want more of Dick Grayson being free from restraints and making his own content away from titans and batfam. I don’t want Titansfam or Batfam. I want Nightwingfam.

Idc if Dick has to join another franchise to do it. Idc if DC has to start his own editorial to do it. I just want them to DO IT! It’s so sad to see a once great character with so much potential become the laughing stock of the entire community all because writers, editors and fans can’t behave and care more about their head canons and fanfics than they do good content.

#Nightiwng #nightwing #my2cents #dc comics #dick grayson #canonvsfanon #antinightwingships #batman #fanonvscanon #not my nightwing #dccomics #batfam #titansfam

33 notes · View notes

bookgeekgrrl · 9 months

Text

My media this week (30 Jul-5 Aug 2023)

📚 STUFF I READ 📚

🥰 Contractual Obligations: A Love Story in Three Traffic Lights (shaenie) - 56K, White Collar threesome, getting together - I loved all the backstory of how Peter & El had been chasing/wooing Neal all along (and the crimes everyone committed along the way)

😍 some sweet violent urge series (voxofthevoid) - 42K, Avengers WS Bucky/modern Steve - roommates to lovers with a D/s vibe - incredibly romantic & tender and also absolutely filthy [reread of pts 1&2, new pt3]

💖💖 +187K of shorter fic so shout out to these I really loved 💖💖

The Gold of Your Body (azephirin) - The Old Guard: Kaysanova, 11K - sometimes devout Catholicism leads to kink discovery

just to see each other (feel it all) (susiecarter) - Top Gun: Maverick/Iceman, 35K - absolutely loved this Pacific Rim AU

fish in the sky (alby_mangroves, chaosmanor) - MCU: stucky, 37K - incredibly gentle and warm story of Steve going to the Stark Family Farm for a forced vacation and meeting the mysterious Russian caretaker, James. I really don't have the words to describe how wonderful this fic is, except that it will make you laugh and maybe cry and leave you as healed as Steve. And also you will want to eat a lot of cheese. This is one of those forever faves that I have bookmarked AND downloaded and saved on every device [reread]

like a monument to desperation, two floors high (greatunironic) - Stranger Things: steddie, 6K - from the 'the most remarkable thing' universe, showing us the reason rock star Eddie & his boyfriend (World's Sexiest Guidance Counselor) were banned for life from the Getty

📺 STUFF I WATCHED 📺

Game Changer - s1, e1-3, 5

Make Some Noise - s1, e1, 9

Um, Actually - s8, e10

Good Omens - s2, e6

Harley Quinn - s4, e1-4

🎧 PODCASTS 🎧

50 Years of Hip-Hop - 1994: "Stress" by Organized Konfusion

Re: Dracula - July 30: Last Night

What Next: TBD Plus - America’s Downtown Ghost Towns

⭐ Desert Island Discs - Stanley Tucci, actor

50 Years of Hip-Hop - 1997: PaRappa the Rapper

50 Years of Hip-Hop - 2000: The Soulquarians

Rivals: Music's Greatest Feuds - Mike Love vs. Brian Wilson: Beach Brawl

The Soundtrack Show - Korngold and Warner Brothers: the Sound of Hollywood Film Scores

The Sporkful - Tommy Pico’s Food History Wasn’t Lost. It Was Stolen.

50 MPH - 8 MPH / Next Action Hero

Food 4 Thot - Like a Virgin

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Bone Vinyl

Pop Culture Happy Hour - Good Omens

Re: Dracula - August 1: That's What it Be

Switched on Pop - Your cursive singing is tearing this family apart!

Into It - #FreeBritney’s Dark Turn

Stuff The British Stole - The Girl Called Pocahontas

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Heating things up in Hatch

⭐ 99% Invisible #547 - Cooking with Gas

Vibe Check - Beam Me Up, Scotty

Re: Dracula - August 2: One More Gone

Ologies with Alie Ward - Neurotechnology (AI + BRAIN TECH) with Nita Farahany

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Dmanisi

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Jacko Steps

Decoder Ring Plus - The Quest for a Homemade Hovercraft

Re: Dracula - August 3: I Know the Secret Now

Song Exploder - Local Natives "Dark Days"

Welcome to Night Vale #231 - The Terminal

50 Years of Hip-Hop - 1989: "Cha Cha Cha" by MC Lyte

50 Years of Hip-Hop - 2001: The Rivalry Between Jay-Z and Nas

50 Years of Hip-Hop - 2002: "Work It" by Missy Elliott

50 Years of Hip-Hop - 2003: Speakerboxxx/The Love Below by Outkast

The Waves Plus - Hollywood is On Strike. Let’s Burn it Down.

⭐ Into It - What Is Going On With Lizzo?

Pop Culture Happy Hour - Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles And What's Making Us Happy

Re: Dracula - August 4: The Mate was Right

Dear Prudence Plus - My Sister Is Doing Everything She Can to Make Me Suffer at Her Wedding. Help!

⭐ What Next: TBD Plus - Tesla's Big Lie

⭐ Endless Thread - PARKS! Pt. 1: Social media gone 'wild'

🎶 MUSIC 🎶

Birth of the Slow Jam

Sweaty EDM Workout

My Mix #5 (Metal)

Paul Simon Radio • 1980s

Leo Moracchioli

Hall and Oates Radio • Upbeat

The Loveliest Time [Carly Rae Jepsen] {2023}

Carly Rae Jepsen

1 note · View note

dailyaudiobible · 1 year

Text

1/8/2023 DAB Transcript

Genesis 18:16-19:38, Matthew 6:25-7:14, Psalm 8:1-9, Proverbs 2:6-15

Today is the 8th day of January, welcome to the Daily Audio Bible, and welcome to week two. We have completed our first full week of this year and our first full week moving through the Scriptures together, day-by-day and step-by-step. So, here we are at the threshold of a brand-new, shiny, sparkly week. And we walk into this week together. And I'll say it many, many, times as we come to the beginning of a new week. This is a fresh start, we’re still just starting our year and so we got a fresh start in the year, but this is a fresh start, a brand-new week. Week number two, which means we have a reset, we can regroup, we can move forward together. And so, let's do just that. We will read from the New International Version this week, and obviously picking up right where we left off yesterday, leads us back into the story of Abraham in the book of Genesis. Abraham and his wife Sarah have been promised to have a son, a promised son. Only problem is that like Abraham's 99 years old and Sarah's like pushing 90, and so, seems like unlikely that they're going to have a kid, but who knows maybe they will. We’ll get to that soon enough. We’ve got a little drama that precedes that. So, let's dive in, Genesis chapter 18 verse 16 through 19 verse 38 today.

Commentary:

Okay, so, like yesterday, we have some very poignant things going on in the gospel of Matthew, coming from the lips of Jesus, that we cannot possibly ignore. And out right here at the beginning of the year, we need to observe what they are and incorporate them into our lives and simply watch what it might look like if we obey. But before we get to that we need to go back into the book of Genesis, because we encountered a story today that probably left most of us going wait a second here. What is going on? So, we have this story of…of Abraham discussing with the Lord, the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, and kind of negotiating. Really, really interesting, “really if they’re 50 people there will you still destroy it’, ‘no, if there are 50 I won’t’, ‘well, what about five less,’ then I won’t if there's 45’, ‘well, what about 30’, it's really, really interesting to watch a human being, Abraham, talking to God and they’re talking back-and-forth. Abraham’s looking for this clarity and he’s negotiating the number down. He gets it down to 10, I’m not really sure why he doesn't like continue to go down to one or whatever, maybe because 10 people is Lots household, that he knows of. And he's just making sure that his own family that's living down in the Jordan Valley will be saved. Nevertheless, there’s this conversation that is taking place between God and Abraham, and God assures Abraham look, I’m not going down there to indiscriminately do anything. I'm going to check things out, and if there's righteousness there then we’ll find it, and if there is only evil there then we’re going to do away with evil because evil is destroying creation. So, this all takes place and we find ourselves down in Sodom, the Angels go home with Lot, they’re surrounded by the men of the village, they want to have sex with the Angels, although they don't know that they are angels. And it's pretty clear that's the Lord is going to bring destruction. So, they spirit Lot away, they’re running for their lives. The girls have been offered up to the mob. So, they’re running away wondering about their value. Although were in an extraordinarily patriarchal culture at this time. Their fiancés have stayed behind and are now dead. Their mom is running with them, but she looks back and then she's gone. And so, all that's left are these two daughters and their dad, and their hold up in a cave. And the daughters decide to sleep with their father to see if they could become pregnant by their father to continue their family line. We see a story like this in the Bible, at least it's been my personal experience, we see a story like this the Bible and go, what in the world? What is this doing in the Bible? And the immediate judgment is like against God. Ironically, like stories that are disruptive in the Bible that make us go, wait a minute, what? What is going on here? They're doing what they're supposed to do. Like, that's what the narrative is supposed to do, we’re supposed to be unsettled. And then we’re supposed to enter in and wrestle with, and observe and look at what's going on in this story? So, it’s so funny how we can read a story in the Bible and then blame God for everything. When, if we you look at the story, God didn’t do any of this. He went to destroy evil, but He did not enter the minds of the daughters and tell them to have sex with their father and see if they could get pregnant. There’s this entire cultural context going on here that reveals to us that these girls, this isn’t like, they weren’t like, yes, a romantic night with dad. Right, like anybody. They were in a situation where the only way, seems to be the wrong way, like there's no good choices. Here they are, foreign women, they had been betrothed. They are no longer engaged; their mom is gone. Their father is aging. They are foreigners and, in this culture, there needs to be a man to claim them, to continue the family line. So that the women will be spoken for and protected. And like there's no way for this to happen. They've lost everything, like their dad who had once been wealthy, is living in a cave with his daughters. They lost everything in this. And so, he can't buy his way out of stuff and he's not going to be able to defend himself. If they’re like moving through the mountains or they’re moving through the plains and they're just trying to stay low to the ground, but people come upon them and here's two beautiful girls and their dad. Pretty easy to take the dad out and steal the girls, like they really don't have a lot of options. Could they flee to their ancestral homeland? Could they go back to wherever their family is? Could they get there by themselves? Probably not, they’re gonna get captured along the way and what will be the outcome? Very likely, they'll be human trafficked, very likely. They'll be prostitutes. And so, they make the choices that they make, believing that this is the only choice that they have. Why they didn't flee back to Abraham, we…we don't know. What we do know is from the text, that there were no angels that appeared to Lot and his daughters, suggesting that the Lord Almighty had put them in the cave because it was His will that they could do this. There were no instructions about any of this from the mouth of God, commanding or inviting any of this. These were the choices that were made, and this is what happened because of those choices. And we can often blame God for the choices that we make, as well. When He had nothing to do with what we decided to do. But if we go back a few days and remember Abraham and Lot standing on top of the lookout and Abraham telling Lot, you pick where you want to go, and I’ll go in the opposite direction. Lot chooses selfishly. Abraham remains steadfast and the stories play out. Which invites us to wrestle with our own lives, the choices that we make are leading somewhere, will end up somewhere. Do we want to end up somewhere where the only way is the wrong way? Or might we consider, being steadfast and believing in the promise?

Then we flip over into the gospel of Matthew and Jesus begins by telling us that essentially, we’re spending more time worrying than is necessary. And were worrying and anxious about things that God is already aware of. And then He's kinda giving us the remedy, seek first the kingdom of God. Seek first like, before your worry and anxiety for all of that, first seek God's kingdom and the righteousness of God. Do that first and all these things will be given to you as well. Don't worry about tomorrow, it’ll take care of itself. What an invitation. Like that’s what Jesus is suggesting that we do, like what if we do that this week. But if before the anxiety and before the sleepless nights, what if first seek God's kingdom and His righteousness. Like, what's the downside to trying it this week? But while we’re doing some trying, Jesus said something very poignant. Yesterday, we’re talking about Jesus right after the Lord's prayer telling us that forgiveness is not an option in God's kingdom. It's like the way of God's kingdom and we need to have that as a category and begin to think about that. Jesus tells us additional information today, and I quote, “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way, you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” That is pretty big and a very important piece of information to know on our faith journey. That we are setting the bar for our own judgment, by the way that we choose to judge others. Like that is something to ponder. And so, you can head right back into Matthew chapter 7 and wrestle with it yourself. Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use it, it will be measured to you. And then Jesus goes on to talk about specks and planks being in eyes. Why are you trying to take the speck out of somebody else's eye, when you got a log in your own eye. Get the log out of your own eye and then you can help the other…other brother or sister get the speck out of their own eye. That's his illustration for what He’s saying about judging. And we could parse this and have all kinds of debate about what it actually means to judge. Like, what are we actually talking about here? Each of us should wrestle with that in our own lives, what does that mean to us? What does that mean to the way we conduct ourselves? What is the Holy Spirit leading us to become aware of? Because if Jesus is telling the truth, and I believe He's telling the truth, like our lives as Christians are centered around this person, like this is the one who came to rescue us, He didn't come here to like lay down the commands, He came here to show us what freedom might look like, how we might live in such a way that will bring us freedom. And how backward we actually live to the way we were intended to live. It’s really easy for us to get judgy. It’s really easy to watch people do things differently than we would do them and have an opinion. And it could be big and it can be small, but we do it all the time and what is it actually doing? Like, aren’t we just continually trying to create comparisons that let us feel superior? And is any of that real? Like do we have any say in any of it? What we've been given control over is ourselves. Can we even handle that? Why do we think we can handle everybody else's life and why do we think we have to have an opinion about everything and why we think we have to post every opinion about everything, all of the time in such highly judgmental ways? I guess, here we are in week two, and were going to find that we learn a lot in the Bible about a lot of things, but the Bible is going to be relentless about confronting us in certain areas, because they will lead us into bondage if we cannot understand what's going on. So, let's wrestle with it, as we move through this week.

Prayer:

And Holy Spirit, we invite You. Wrestling with these things and trying to improve ourselves in our own strength, by brute force. We have tried and failed and tried and failed. And so, we will only fail at any of these things without You coming and revealing things to us and transforming us from within. And we’re getting a good picture from Jesus that we spend an awful lot of time on our exterior lives and most of our energy, when we’re ignoring what is true. Life from within. So, Holy Spirit, come. Help us with the way that we carry around unforgiveness, help us with the way that we can be so judgmental toward each other. Help us to understand that we’re setting the bar for our own selves. We pray this in the name of Jesus. Amen.

Prayer and Encouragements:

Good morning DABers. This message is especially for God's Chosen and child. Thank you for putting a smile on my face and joy in my heart as I started my day, today. I call myself the Potter's Clay and am the mother of a 31-year-old medically fragile and totally dependent daughter. Your worship and song gave me the energy and encouragement, I needed to start my day. God bless you and God bless that precious little girl of yours. Thanks again.

Hey this is Shawn, I’m from Nicaragua. Just want to shout out. I’ve been here with the Daily Audio Bible for a year now and I’ve seen God work in my life. I just want to thank you Brian, for always being there and just keep up the good work, man. We just thank You Lord for Brian and his family. That he may keep doing the will of the Lord. Bless his heart, dear Lord, in the name of Jesus we pray. Amen.

Hi friends, my sisters and brothers in the Lord. I am sitting in my living room; my youngest girl is watching cartoons. And I just listened to the Daily Bible reading. And this is just my day number two. I just downloaded the app, just before new year. So, I’m amazed by this app, but this community is amazing. Able to send prayer requests, able to pray for other people. I just want to say, just like were told every day here, you are loved, and I want to say that I love you. Praying with you here. And really hope that you have a wonderful day. And then especially those of you who struggle with depression and stillness and yeah. That God may lift you up or yeah, that He will strengthen you. And I ask people to pray for me yesterday because I have had depression before and have felt a little bit again now. This last half year. It would really help if you pray for me. I can feel a difference today. I feel more at peace, so that’s wonderful. So, praise the Lord, and thank you. Happy New Year to all of you.

Hello, I’m Hudson. My brother has diabetes and it’s been tough for him. I need your prayers please. I’m Hudson. Hope you all are doing well.

I’d like to give a praise report. Thank you, Brian and family. What a blessing. You’ve really, really help me beyond what words can say. I can read but I really struggle around it. So, two-fold, when COVID first came, in the UK, I was in a bad way when I first fell down. And it was only listening for people asking for prayer, it actually snapped me out of it cause I realized it’s not just me. I’ve got four children, so I’ve been on my own for years. It can be a horrible place at times. Anyway, thank you. I had a lung infection. I couldn’t breathe. There can’t be anything worse than not being able to breath. Anyway, I put it out on the Prayer Wall. And within a couple of hours of putting it out on the Prayer Wall, people were praying for me. And I loved it, absolutely loved it. So, thank you and I really do appreciate it. God bless you all and keep you all safe. Amen.

Hello Daily Audio Bible family, this is Shantay calling from the Treasure Coast of Florida. And there was a call from John 3:16 that just had me in tears in a bittersweet, to put it that way. Because I believe that we each …shore. I am still grieving over the loss of Pelham. You know, it was just all so sudden for us. I just so related to his call. It’s like, he said he felt like he didn’t convey how much he meant. And I feel that way too. I was even ___ I didn’t really chat with him that much like I could have, you know. But I know, I know he knows how much we cared for him. I just know that. We’re a family and you can’t fake this, you just can’t. It just, although my first time when I heard Brian and he you know, he read the Bible and that at the end he said, I love you. Now, I was thinking to myself, now that’s a little, okay. Uh, you know, it was my first time listening and I’m like okay, you know, whatever. But as I continue to listen and listen and listen that feeling just overwhelmed me of love for this community. Of love for Brian. Of love for what we have here. And yeah, there’s no denying it. So, I’m just grateful. I’m grateful for each and every one of you. And on most of my calls I end with, I love you, because I truly feel that. And yes, we will definitely grief for Pelham. Praise God he’s with Jesus right now. It was just all so sudden, it really was. But God’s timing is His timing, it’s perfect and we have to…

2 notes · View notes