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sarcastic-sunshines · 3 years

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Letters for my Love - Chapter 9

Pairing: T’Challa x Black Reader

Chapter 1 I Chapter 2 I Chapter 3 I Chapter 4 I Chapter 5 I Chapter 6 I Chapter 7 I Chapter 8

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Chapter 9

My Love,

By the grace of Bast alone, I am a Baba to an 18 year old, quite frankly, she is an adult now. Nono’s 18th birthday seems to be filled with reflection, not for her, but mostly for me. Of course her birthday always signifies how long we have been without you. It is crazy to think how time has passed, how when I first held that little baby girl in my hands, I was unsure of how I would heal myself enough to be the father she was deserving of. Now here she is, a week away from going across the country for university. Though she grew up right in front of me, I am still left with shock at the not so little girl that stares back at me. Her smile has not changed since she was born, her whole face actually belongs to you. One could argue I had no part in the matter of her creation. It's astonishing sometimes to see, I find myself having to take a moment in case I call her the wrong name.

But here she is, making lists and picking courses and I am once again left to deal with how a milestone in my daughter's life means a change in my own. And as much I have prepared myself, or thought I had, I am sure I will cry when we finally have to drive away and I have to leave her there. We have never been apart for longer than three weeks. Even then, I spoke to her for two hours everyday, considering it was my honeymoon, Akina was not as impressed.

But university will most likely not allow for that, and now I feel the separation anxiety kicking in. I am trying to put on a brave face for her. She is so excited and no matter how old she gets, if my excitement does not match hers, she begins to question herself. Her only nervousness lies in the fact that Chima, her boyfriend, will be going to a school here in the city. He has been over more than usual, and unfortunately the high emotions are making them bicker more as well. It reminds me of when we chose to break up when it was my turn to go off to school. Well you made the decision and I reluctantly agreed. At that age, that felt like the hardest thing I would ever have to do. But I now appreciate you making that decision, it allowed me to do some growing up and to confirm what I already knew, that you were the one for me.

Your daughter on the other hand, is determined to make this work long distance. Chima does not seem as enthused. But like you, Nono is very convincing and has somehow continued to push the narrative that this will work. And I pray it does because I am not ready to see her experience heartbreak. This as always, will be a journey and I ask you to watch over us as we go through this new walk of life.

Yours Forever,

T’Challa

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T’Challa looked around the room, boxes of his daughter’s life that sat in front of him, ready to be packed up and taken with her as she left their home for the first time. His eyes moved from the boxes to his daughter, who sat on the ground of her room running through a list on her beads.

“ Did you hear what I said Baba?” T’Challa realized she had been calling for him a while.

“ I’m sorry Nono I got distracted, what did you say darling” he turned his body to his daughter.

“ I was saying, I don’t think I can take everything so maybe you all could send some more of my things later”

“ Nobomi, I have watched you pack endless suitcases of clothes and Bast knows what else, what else could you possibly need?”

“ Well I haven’t even packed my books yet” she snorted at her father’s frown.

“ That should have been number one, maybe Chima can bring them when he comes and sees you in a few weeks” Nono’s face dropped before she tried to hide her frustration.

“That’s not happening anymore” T’Challa just looked at her waiting for her to go further. “ We just decided that we may need more than a few weeks to get used to being in uni. So I will see him when the semester is over.”

T’Challa nodded slowly, hoping his face stayed neutral to not show how he really felt about his daughter’s relationship.

“ Well, I think I have a conference in a few weeks close to your campus. So maybe I can come by with whatever you need. And perhaps you will have time for lunch with your Baba.”

Nono smiled at her Baba before answering. “ I’ll always find time for you, Baba”

“ I’m glad, I know how busy university can get darling, I’m really going to miss you Nobomi.”

Despite his best attempt, a solemn smile rested on his face. Nobomi felt herself getting emotional just looking at him.

“ Baba no! We agreed you are allowed to get emotional tomorrow and tomorrow only”, she said, blinking quickly to stop her own tears before they came. She had refused to address it, but she was going to miss her family a lot.

She thought about how different her brother would look by the time she came back after the semester. Bulelani was already growing so fast. She would miss her late night chats with Akina, and of course, she was going to miss her Baba the most. She had never been without him for so long. And as much as she had raved about her new independence, she was going to miss the first best friend that the world gave her. She wasn’t sure how she was going to cope, she was equally excited and nervous.

“ You are right, we will save the dramatics for tomorrow, just know I am excited for you, and I cannot wait to hear about everything you learn and get to experience” he walked over and kissed the top of her head before deciding it was time for him to leave her to her packing.

“ And make sure your books end up in one of the boxes, please and thank you”

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The flight to Nobomi’s school was too short for T’Challa’s liking. They had left quite early, and Nobomi had slept on his shoulder the whole way there. So rarely would moments like that happen anymore and he didn’t want it to end. Meanwhile Akina had been taking pictures and recording every moment since they got up.

“ Are you ever going to stop recording love?” He asked as she appeared with her wrist pointed at him once again.

“ Not until the end of the day, I need to make sure I catch every single tear.” she said with smirk

“ You act like this will not be you when Lani is no longer small enough for you to carry”

“ I still have about 10 years” She took a seat next to T’Challa. Nono stirred in her sleep from the chatter. T’Challa watched for a moment as she settled back comfortably.

“ I promise you, the time flies, before you know it, they are not little anymore.” he said quietly, turning back to his wife. Akina took his hand into hers.

“ I know, but I will have you to hold me, just like you have me today. I know this is going to be hard for you, so don’t hesitate to lean on me.” he nodded, not wanting to speak in case every emotion he was feeling came flying out. He knew Akina was aware of how grateful he was for her. Bast had really blessed him to experience love twice and he couldn’t be more thankful for it.

The jet had landed and Nobomi finally lifted her head, looking out the window at what would be her new home away from home.

Okoye rose from the pilot’s seat, with Nobomi’s dora beside her. “ It is time my King”

He nodded as the door opened, followed by the King's Guards running in to carry the boxes and suitcases. Not long after, Nobomi and her brother followed with Akina next to them. He stayed behind, trying to believe that if he stayed on board, time may slow down for a second. He gave himself a second before finally following everyone out the door.

The day continued to go by quickly, finding Nono’s apartment style accommodation had been beyond easy. It helped that everyone knew the crowned princess was arriving. The royals quickly met Nono’s best friend and roommate Fatou, who had gotten there an hour before them. The two girls buzzed around with their mothers, decorating the apartment and placing everything where it needed to be. T’Challa tried to offer his services but was quickly sent off with Fatou’s father to find lunch.

The two men strolled the campus, with Bulelani running ahead of them, discussing how the girls had been together most of their lives and how strange it was to see them going off to school. Both father’s were proud but the nerves were there.

“ I promise you it doesn’t get easier. Fatoumata is my second last and it still feels as it did when her eldest brother first left home”

“ And here I thought it would be better by the time Lani went off to school” The men chuckled as they made their way back to the apartment building. He had become aware of the stares and whispers and began to hope that Nono would not have to endure the same experience throughout her whole university career.

“ Unfortunately no, but like with everything else in their lives, you push them to do their best and smile when they succeed, and be there to catch them in case they fall” Fatou’s father offered with a smile as the two men walked into the building.

They had lunch together, and it had become obvious both Nobomi and T’Challa could tell the hours were winding down. They took a final tour of the campus and very soon they were walking back to the front of Nono's building to say goodbye. The father-daughter pair had linked arms as T’Challa offered any last advice he could think of.

“ You can come home whenever you need to, just call me and Ayo will be here to get you in no time”

“ But she won’t need it because Nono is going to have so much fun” Akina yelled behind her, making Nono laugh. T’Challa rolled his eyes with a smile before continuing.

“ Don’t forget to call, no matter where I am in the world, I want to hear from you”

“ Okay Baba, I will I promise” she let go of his arm to say goodbye to Akina. She gave her step-mother a huge hug and a kiss on the cheek.

“ Don’t forget to call me too, alright sweetheart. Our late night conversations do not have to end just because you are away” Nobomi nodded with a smile before kneeling in front of her brother.

“ Don’t grow up too fast, okay Lani”

“ I won’t, I’m gonna miss you sissy” Nono finally felt the emotions coming in. T’Challa turned away from his children, not wanting to cry.

“ I’m going to miss you too. I will call you as much as I can. I love you” She hugged her brother tight, kissing his cheeks as many times as he would allow her. She eventually stood up and faced her father who had finally turned back to his family.

“ Lani, let’s go get into the jet, ” Akina said softly, as she led their son down the path kissing T’Challa before leaving him and Okoye.

T’Challa looked behind to see them walking away, before walking toward Nobomi with a small smile. He took her hands into his, before reaching up and smoothing down a few hairs that had escaped her bun. He held his hand to her cheek trying to hold himself together. He was so proud of who she was becoming. He never wanted her to think she couldn’t go and discover new parts of the world by herself. This was part of her journey and he knew she needed it, so remembering that, his smile extended further.

“ Your mother would be so proud of you” He saw Nono’s lip quiver.

“ You think so?”

“ I know so, because I am so proud of you. And although I am going to miss you so much, I am overjoyed by this new milestone you are about to embark on”

“ Baba, I am a little scared, I can’t lie”

“ Being scared just means you care, you will be fine. And if you need to hear that again, I am a phone call away. You know that.” he reached over and wiped the tear off of Nono’s face.

He was shocked at how well he was keeping it together when it felt like half his heart was being left in a strange place.

“ I am going to miss you so much.” and with that, his daughter had unlocked the floodgates, a tear escaped his eye before he could catch it. They both turned to see Fatou waiting for Nono at the door.

His little girl gave him a big hug and a kiss on the cheek making him smile. “I love you Baba”

He thought about how she had done the same thing all those years ago on her first day of school. How afraid he was, and how he didn’t want to let her go. Now here he was having to do the same thing, except his Nobomi was not as little anymore.

“I love you more” and with that, she pulled away turning to meet Fatou at the door. Nobomi turned once more time to wave goodbye to her Baba. T’Challa waved goodbye before catching a singular tear that had fallen.

“Are you okay Kumkani” Okoye asked

“No, but I will be,” He said, turning to go back down the path to the jet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My Love,

To say watching our daughter walk into that school was easy would be a huge lie. It took everything in me to watch her go off and create memories without me. But it had to be done and I am so proud of her.

I know you were watching over her as she navigates this new milestone. A milestone that she is enjoying if I may add. The first week was hard, she called everyday, often with nothing to say, but just to hear our voices. But now we are down to three calls a week, and I can’t get her to stop talking about everything she is doing. All these years later and every story still begins with ‘Fatou and I’. I can hear the smile in her voice whenever she calls, and it brings me comfort to know she is okay.

I am sure when I see her in a few weeks she will seem different to me. Only six weeks would have gone by at that point but university does that to you. I remember calling you and realizing that you were different from the girl I had left and was ready to rediscover who you were when I returned home. I also will finally get to ask about Chima. She doesn’t talk about him as much anymore and I fear that is the beginning of the end. I really did like him too. But as people grow it is not shocking that they grow apart. Not everyone can be us. Either way, I ask that you continue to watch over her and help her through any emotions she hasn’t been able to come to me with.

Yours Forever,

T’Challa

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T’Challa waited outside the library as Nobomi had instructed him. He sat on a bench with a box of her things he had promised to bring. He waved at students who were shocked to see their King sitting ever so casually on their campus. He didn’t think too much about it, he was just excited to see his daughter.

Her absence was felt at home by everyone, especially him. And although they spoke often, he couldn’t wait to be able to hug her and check up on her in person. He saw her leaving the building and walking faster when she eventually caught his eye. He couldn’t help but to stand up and smile as his daughter finally entered his arms.

“ Hi Baba, I missed you” She whispered into his shoulder. He pulled away and looked at his daughter properly.

“ I missed you too Nobomi wam” She looked a little tired, but he wanted to believe that was from studying and endless nights out on the town. They turned to begin heading to lunch. As they walked Nobomi talked his ear off about the overload of work she had and some of the fun she had been getting into. By the time they had finished eating, Nono had talked his ears off, only pausing to take bites of her food.

“ I was talking so much I forgot to ask about home. How is everyone?”

“ Everyone is fine, we all just miss you that’s all” he said reaching into a bag he had under the table.

“ Your brother told me it was of utmost importance that you received his drawings.”

“ Awww Lani is so sweet! I am going to make this the center of my picture wall” she smiled brightly pointing at her brother's drawing of the two of them.

“ And both your grandmothers and Akina all made sure I did not leave without several containers of food” Nono’s smile grew even more at the thought of home cooked food.

“ I am already hungry again thinking about all the foods I've missed. Especially Sunday dinner with my grandma”

“Yes, I do miss having her send leftovers for me” they both laughed before T’Challa continued.

“ Was Chima not supposed to drop something off for me to bring to you? Because he never came by.” He saw Nono’s fall, and suddenly she couldn’t seem to hide how she felt.

“ I don’t know, he has been kind of distant, and it seems like our schedules never match up. And when they do, he seems distracted and is really short with me.”

T’Challa felt bad, he knew Nono was starting to see the end. Something he had predicted for some time.

“ Well, I cannot justify his behaviour but you both are growing trying to figure out your new lives. It can be very difficult. What you can do is just hope for the best and try to hear each other out”

She nodded, staring at her cup of tea. T’Challa didn’t know what to say and decided to allow the silence to cover them.

“ What did you and mama do? You were all the way in America” Nono finally asked. T’Challa smiled before speaking.

“ Your mother actually broke up with me before I went off for school”

“ Really you never told me that”

“ I know, I don’t like to talk about the time we weren’t really together. Though it rarely felt like it. We spoke almost every day. “

“Then why did you break up, if you were going to be basically together anyway”

“Because, your mother was so certain it would be less painful this way. I tried to convince her otherwise. But if she was sure of something, very little changed her mind. She said, ‘what is mine will also come back to me. So if we are meant to be, I know you will come back to me”

“ Wow, mama sounds a little crazy” T’Challa laughed, shortly after Nono joined him.

“ At the time, I thought so too. I would tell her I was already hers and there was no need to worry but she insisted it was better this way. So I went off to school, and we didn’t speak for two months. I was experiencing so many new things that by the time two weeks had passed, the sole person I wanted to talk about it with was her”

He smiled at the memory, and looked over at his daughter's soft smile waiting for him to continue. He found she was always the most attentive when he spoke about her mother, and over the years it was the push he needed to talk about her more.

Nono had done a lot of prodding to get her Baba to open up about her mother, specifically their love story. She had heard so much about it from others, but it always sounded the best coming from her Baba. She could tell he still cared for her, she admired it and hoped that she would experience a love that strong. That's what she was hoping to recreate with Chima, but his recent shift in attitude made her feel as though it was no longer possible. His apathetic approach to their relationship had made her start to question her own feelings for him.

But hearing about the relationship that her parents shared always reminded her of what she was aiming for.

“ So I called her, and just hoped she would pick up, and when she did, it was like we picked up exactly where we left off. As friends though, she continued to insist that we needed the time apart. Though we spoke everyday, she was old fashioned so she would make me send postcards and letters and I learned over the years she kept them all.”

“ That’s sweet, so you both stayed single then and waited” T’Challa shook his head and Nono gasped.

“ She was the first one to find someone. I had actually heard from your uncle Erik that she was seeing someone and never told me. I cannot lie, the jealousy kicked in and I could barely think straight. Next time I spoke to her I picked a fight and she knew exactly what it was about and quickly reminded me that she wasn’t mine anymore”

“ Aww Baba” Nono looked at him sympathetically.

“Hold on, I am the winner in this story” he replied proudly.

“ Granted it took some time, she continued to see this man and I eventually found someone and when I brought up this person, I could see the jealousy all over your mother’s face.” he continued smugly. “ I must admit it was good to see, but I continued to date over the years. And so did she, but we both refused to stop being friends, or telling each other about our love lives. It was beyond immature looking back, we just were torturing the other and mostly ourselves.”

“So then how is that better than Chima and I just struggling through and figuring it out as we go?” Nono asked, taking a sip from her glass.

“ Because the difference was that by the time I graduated and came back briefly before grad school, I was older and more mature. We had experienced more and I was sure that she was who I wanted. Now imagine how awful long distance would have been for our two jealous souls. When I tell you any whisper from your uncle about who she was seeing was enough to ruin my day. It was better we didn’t labour each other with this misplaced jealousy.”

“ Now how did you know she was just as sure as you were?”

“ Because, the minute we were both single, the flirting began, especially when she knew I was coming home soon. All the signs were there, but of course that didn’t stop me from being nervous. But I knew how much I loved her, so I waited on her dorm door and when she opened it, I said, ‘I am yours and I have come back to you’

“ Oh my Bast, Baba you are so corny” Nono giggled as a goofy smile spread on her father’s face.

“ That may be true, but it worked. Besides, the only person that mattered appreciated it and we made it work, no matter the circumstance. The point being, you shouldn’t be afraid to maybe let go, it might be better for the both of you in the long run.”

“ And what if it isn’t?”

“ Then time will heal all your wounds, and you will eventually move on to experience many loves in your life.”

“ You think so?”

“ I know so, you my darling will never have to worry about that” he said with a comforting smile as he placed his hand over her protectively.

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T’Challa was surprised by how fast the rest of the semester had gone. After visiting Nobomi, the weeks seem to fly, and she was soon home again. Seeing as it was the Festival of Bast, Nobomi’s break had her running around Birnin Zana attending different celebrations with friends and sometimes family. T’Challa did wish he could have her all to herself, but he knew that couldn’t be the case, so he was grateful for the evenings when she was home and allowed him to enjoy her presence before she would return to her studies.

It hadn’t taken long, her time at home had gone from a few weeks to just a few days left. He had been walking around their home looking to see if she had time for dinner with him.

“ Have you seen Nobomi” he asked Akina, who seemed ready to go out herself. “ Where are you going?”

“ Which question would you like me to answer first?” she said as she applied lipstick.

“Either would work, have I told you how beautiful you look today” he said getting distracted by Akina’s beauty

“ Thank you love” she smiled, and blew him a kiss. “ Lani and I are going to go see my parents. As for Nono, I think she went out to see Chima.”

His face fell realizing she was busy. “ But that was a while ago, she may be back soon” Akina offered as comfort.

Their son came running into the room, growing impatient with waiting for his mother.

“ Lani, have you seen your sister.”

“ Yes, she is in the garden, Mama can we go now?” Akina nodded, she kissed her husband goodbye and began leading the 7 year old towards the door. T’Challa decided to walk towards the garden to look for Nobomi.

Before he could make it there, Nobomi’s Dora, stopped him in the hallway and let him know she was sitting in the room where all her mother’s things had been kept. He was a little surprised she was in there, but the look on the Dora’s face let him know all wasn’t well. He changed his direction and headed towards that section of the palace.

He knocked before entering but could not see her in the large room, he looked around the boutique like room. He hardly came here but whenever he did, the memories always hit him just as hard. Being there always felt like he could feel her presence more, he wasn’t sure if he was making that up, but he liked to think he wasn’t.

This time was no difference as he found his daughter sitting on the floor going through a box as she sniffled.

“ Nobomi wam, what’s wrong? Did something happen?” As he spoke, he recognized the stack of postcards in her hands. He couldn’t believe those were still here.

“ Chima cheated on me” she mumbled, she looked up and he could see her quivering lip as she tried to keep her sobs from coming out. He looked at her sympathetically before crouching down and sitting next to her. She immediately buried her face in his shoulder as the sobs finally took over her body. He turned to hug her, not speaking as she got everything out. Eventually she pulled away, wiping her puffy eyes, going back to flipping through the postcards.

“ Nono, I am sorry”

“ It explains why he had been so distracted. He said his feelings had changed and he didn’t want to miss the chance he would have with his new girl. If that was the case, he could have told me weeks ago. I wouldn’t have been trying so hard to save this sinking ship of a relationship.” she hiccuped.

“ I agree, it was quite selfish of him. But at least you know before leaving again and continuing a toxic pattern. It is okay to be hurt, but know one day you will wake up the heartbreak you feel will be gone”

“ I just want a love like you and Mama had. I want the love story, and I am already failing at that” T’Challa took the postcards from her hand and placed them back in the box. He hadn’t realised the expectations his daughter had placed on herself.

“ Nobomi, you do not have to emulate anything your mother and I had. That is not how it works”

“ I just want to experience a love like that.” she mumbled as he held her close.

“ And you will, but it will be on your own terms and based on the timeline Bast has for you. Do not stress yourself trying create what isn’t yours”

“ I thought Chima was mine, but I guess not. How am I even sure what is mine anymore”

“ You will know, it will feel right. There will be very few doubts, I can tell you that much. It will find you when you least expect it. Just allow yourself to heal first.”

“ How do you know? You married your high school sweetheart”

“ And we had our issues, and even bigger than that, I lost her when I still have so much love to give” That got Nono’s attention, she turned to see his sad smile.

“ I was beyond heartbroken, and I had you to think about. So I had no choice but to allow myself to heal. And as I did, many wanted me to take another queen, even when I knew I wasn’t ready. So I resisted and I was very picky with who I let near both me and you. I tried to not make the wrong decision and always felt unsure. But when I met Akina, there was no doubt in that. I recognized the feeling and knew she was the one.”

“ Just like that?” She raised an eyebrow, the way her father described love, this feeling, it always seemed to find him when he needed it the most. She hoped it would be just as easy for her. Right now it didn’t feel like it would.

“ Yes, I promise you will know as soon as you feel it. The doubts will be less, you will be more sure of yourself. Just do not give yourself a timeline that will only stress yourself out. Part of being human is finding love and experiencing heartbreak, so there is no need to feel like you need to be doing more.”

Nono picked up a picture of her parents from the box and stared intensely at it. T’Challa looked as well, he smiled at the sight of his soulmate.

“ What is mine will come to me?” Nono whispered, before resting her head back on his shoulder.

“ Yes, whoever is your is out there waiting for you to heal and Bast will eventually bring you both together. This I know, so you my darling will never have to worry” he kissed the top of her forehead and they sat in silence for a moment longer before he started describing the memories in the photos, knowing Nono would appreciate the slight shift in conversation.

They stayed in the room talking until her sniffles became giggles. His little girl was not so little anymore. Here she was going through growing pains right before his very eyes. He hated to see her go through heartbreak, and if he could bubble wrap her heart, he would. But he knew she would be a better person because of it. As afraid as he was to see her become her own woman, he was ready for whatever journey she chose to take, as long she still allowed him to hold her through it.

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My Love,

Our daughter had quite an eventful first semester. I should not have expected any less if I am being honest. But of course, when it comes to our daughter, I am still so surprised and nervous by what happens to her. Here she is going through relationship issues. If someone had told me 18 years ago I would be sitting with her offering the best I have to deal with heartbreak, I may have laughed. Mostly because I would have wondered what the solution was as I healed through my own heartbreak. Back then I was more focused on making it through the first year, let alone the obstacles that came with the 18th.

But what all these years of being a father have shown me is that I am more than capable of navigating whatever comes in the path of my children. As long as they will have me, I will always be there to guide them, today proved that. I so badly wanted to find Chima and make him pay for ever breaking my baby girl’s heart. But instead I sat with her and just listened and I know that meant more to her than anything else. I know it didn’t fully take the pain away, but I am sure it helped, in addition to the trip to her favourite ice cream parlour after.

So when she goes back off to school in the upcoming days, and she gives me a hug goodbye, I will remind her that she always has me here to listen and support her through the heartbreaks of life. Because that is all I can really do at this point. There are no longer any monsters under her bed to chase away, even if there were, I have to allow her to try and get rid of them herself. She is her own person now and I thank Bast everyday for just the chance to see her become who she is. I know none of this is possible without you watching over us all these years. Neither I or Nono let your memory disappear. We did a good job with her, she is a perfect mix of both of us, and I know because of that she will be able to handle whatever life throws her way.

Yours Forever,

T’Challa

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Taglist: @aloevverified @chaneajoyyy @shaekingshitup @ghostfacekill-monger @ashanti-notthesinger @fd-writes @abrunettefangirlnerd @yoyolovesbucky @toni9

#Letter's for my love #sunshinewrites #sarcasticsunshine #t'challa x reader

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ao3feed-tomarrymort · 4 years

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by SarcasticSunshine

Helena Potter was feared, by both the world and the underworld. The people feared the killer that stalked their streets, making their kills into art, and the criminals feared the Moriarty-esque figure that haunted the streets. Her name was whispered, and the fear they felt was invigorating. She was on top, and nothing would take her down.

Words: 2059, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: F/F, F/M

Characters: Harry Potter, Voldemort (Harry Potter), Tom Riddle | Voldemort, Tom Riddle

Relationships: Harry Potter/Tom Riddle, Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Harry Potter & Tom Riddle, Hermione Granger & Harry Potter & Ron Weasley

Additional Tags: Female Harry Potter, Female Tom Riddle, Violence, Organized Crime, a kinda slow burn?, I mean, i haven't quite figured it out yet, Rivalry, Harry Potter is a Good Friend, Sane Tom Riddle, Dark Harry Potter, Manipulative Tom Riddle, Manipulative Harry Potter, everybody is somewhat manipulative, some people just aren't so good at it, The Author Regrets Nothing, Don't Like Don't Read, will add more tags

#ao3feed #fanfiction #harry potter #tomarry #harrymort

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ao3feed-harryginny · 4 years

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The Pain of Being Human

by SarcasticSunshine

Being the Master of Death was never supposed to be an easy job, but Harry liked to think he handled it masterfully. However, Death didn't agree. So Harry was sent back to be reborn as a mortal, to get more in touch with his human side. Now living as Camdyn Stewart, he has to navigate through Hogwarts as The-Boy-Who-Lived barrels through.

(I know the summary is kinda bad, but stick with me here.)

Words: 818, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: F/F, F/M, M/M

Characters: Harry Potter, Camdyn Stewart, Tom Riddle, Tom Riddle | Voldemort, Voldemort (Harry Potter), Neville Longbottom, Luna Lovegood, Original Characters, Alyssa Stewart

Relationships: Harry Potter/Tom Riddle | Voldemort, Harry Potter/Tom Riddle, Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley, Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Draco Malfoy/Original Male Character(s), Neville Longbottom/Luna Lovegood

Additional Tags: Master of Death Harry Potter, Rebirth, Time Travel, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Eldritch beings, Angst, Fluff, Angst and Feels, BAMF Harry Potter, BAMF Camdyn, everybody is a badass, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Constipation, Manipulative Albus Dumbledore, Camdyn Stewart is Harry Potter

Read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/3aJGXDh

#Harry Potter #Ginny Weasley #HarryGinny #Hinny #ao3feed #fanfic

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ao3feed-grishaverse · 4 years

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Six Crows Marks a Thief

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2UZBT8y

by SarcasticSunshine

Hogwarts: a bustling hub of international trade where anything can be had for the right price - and no one knows that more than criminal prodigy Tom Riddle. Tom is offered a chance at a deadly heist that could make him rich beyond his wildest dreams. But he can't pull it off alone. . . .

A convict with a thirst for revenge

A sharpshooter who can't walk away from a wager

A runaway with a privileged past

A spy known as the Wraith

A Heartrender using her magic to survive the slums

A thief with a gift for unlikely escape

Tom's crew are the only ones who might stand between the world and destruction - if they don't kill each other first.

Words: 6749, Chapters: 1/45, Language: English

Series: Part 1 of Duology of Crows

Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: F/M, M/M

Characters: Harry Potter, Tom Riddle | Voldemort, Tom Riddle, Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley, Cho Chang, Cedric Diggory, Voldemort (Harry Potter), Albus Dumbledore

Relationships: Harry Potter/Tom Riddle, Cho Chang/Cedric Diggory, Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Harry Potter/Tom Riddle | Voldemort, Harry Potter & Tom Riddle, Harry Potter & Ron Weasley, Cho Chang & Cedric Diggory & Harry Potter

Additional Tags: Dark Harry, Morally Grey Harry Potter, Alternate Universe - Six of Crows Fusion, Fluff and Angst, Humor, Fluff, Angst, Murder, Heist, this is basically Six of Crows with Harry Potter characters, Harry is a smol scary bean that need to be protected, tom is scary, Harry Needs a Hug, Tom Needs a Hug, Traumatized Tom, Everybody is Traumatized, Ron is a chaotic bisexual, cho is a raging pansexual, Harry is Inej, Tom is Kaz, Ron is Jesper, Hermione is Wylan, Cho is Nina, Cedric is Mattias, Albus Dumbledore is Pekka Rollins, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, The Author Regrets Nothing, enjoy, will put in more tags as the story progresses

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2UZBT8y

#six of crows #six of crows fanfic #soc #soc fanfic #grishaverse #ao3feed-grishaverse

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stephiewoodcock · 7 years

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#goodmorning #okitslate #sorrynotsorry #sarcasticsunshine

#okitslate #goodmorning #sorrynotsorry #sarcasticsunshine

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angryyoungandpoordotcom · 6 years

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Congrats to all of our Dec. Season of Giving AYP winners! You are all winner's w us....use AYPCHEERS now for 10% off all your non music online orders & be on the lookout for a NEW contest soon! Keep tagging your AYP merch pics #angryyoungandpoor to get featured! Winners @seanmolter35 @sarcasticsunshine @artificialsweetener_ @missghoulski666 #aypcustomersrock #punk #metal #horror #shopindependent (at Angry Young & Poor)

#horror #punk #aypcustomersrock #shopindependent #metal #angryyoungandpoor

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hannibal-abo · 4 years

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The Alchemy of Truths and Lies

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/3eN5Tfz

by SarcasticSunshine

As Will and Hannibal plummeted off the cliff, Will woke up to his ceiling in Wolf Trap, Virginia.

==============================================================

With a deep, gasping breath, Will woke up, and the first thing he saw was the ceiling of his home in Wolf Trap. His breath caught in his throat, chest stuttering, and he frantically tumbled off the bed. Will smelled his own scent, a scent of sweat and fear. Stumbling to his bathroom, he flicked the light on, staring at himself in the mirror.

Words: 997, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Hannibal (TV)

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: F/F, F/M, M/M

Characters: Will Graham, Hannibal Lecter, Alana Bloom, Margot Verger, Will Graham's Dogs, Jack Crawford, Bella Crawford, Abigail Hobbs

Relationships: Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter, Will Graham & Hannibal Lecter, Alana Bloom/Margot Verger, Will Graham & Abigail Hobbs, Alana Bloom & Will Graham, Bella Crawford/Jack Crawford, Alana Bloom & Margot Verger, Will Graham & Will Graham's Dogs

Additional Tags: Jack Crawford Being Jack Crawford, Jack Crawford Being an Asshole, Will Graham Loves Hannibal Lecter, Hannibal Lecter Loves Will Graham, Angst, Angst and Feels, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Dark Will Graham, Post-Episode: s03e13 The Wrath of the Lamb, Time Travel, will add more tags

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/3eN5Tfz

#ao3feed #fanfic #Hannibal #Hannibal TV #alpha/beta/omega dynamics #adhere to author tags

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sarcastic-sunshines · 4 years

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Letters for my Love - Chapter 8

Pairing: T’Challa x Black Reader

Chapter 1 I Chapter 2 I Chapter 3 I Chapter 4 I Chapter 5 I Chapter 6 I Chapter 7

_____________________________________________________________________________

My Love,

Though it is hard for me to believe, we somehow have a teenage daughter. Though her new attitude constantly reminds me that my Nobomi is no longer the giggling 4 year old that never wanted to leave my side. Now at fifteen, I can barely get her to have a conversation with me that lasts longer than ten minutes. If not for her royal lessons, I doubt I would see her. She still looks so much like you, even more as she gets older. She is also as quiet as you were at her age, I still remember seeing you at the end of the hallways, silently laughing as you looked at the craziness that was high school. Even at that age, you had me enamoured. The memory still brings a smile to my face as I get lost in the thought of you.

But back to Nono, I used to be her best friend, she would tell me every and anything without me asking. Now it is like pulling teeth, and being unsuccessful. Akina keeps telling me that it is just her age, and the fact that she is a growing girl. As much as I am glad that she does turn to Akina with her worries, I can’t lie and say I am not jealous, because that used to be me. I am trying to figure out my place in my daughter’s life again, I try not to overstep but the distance sometimes makes me feel like I am losing her. I really am hoping this is a phase and I get my bubbly Nobomi back soon.

Yours Forever,

T’Challa

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“ He is going to ask you tomorrow for sure”

T’Challa overheard Fatou tell Nobomi as he passed by the living area where the two were supposed to be studying. Instead they were immersed in conversation about their school formal. T’Challa had heard about it from Akina, who seemed to be his new source for everything Nobomi. He didn’t know when it happened, but his baby girl was no longer a baby, and as he watched her try and form her own identity in the world, she had begun to become more withdrawn from him.

“ You are just saying that” Nobomi replied, she rolled her eyes but T’Challa noticed the smile that stayed on her face from his spot in the entrance of the room, trying to remain unseen for as long as possible.

“ I am not, Kutenda told me today at lunch that Chima was asking about you and your locker, he might slip a note since he is too nervous to ask”

“Your boyfriend has quite the theory”

“ Well it's going to happen, then we can take the cutest pictures together” Nobomi’s best friend enthused, carrying enough excitement for the both of them.

T’Challa felt suddenly protective, he somehow had never considered Nobomi would be at the age where she would be interested in boys. It was quite foolish of him considering that that was the same age he first approached her mother.

“ That’s not even my worry right now, my dress is nowhere close to done,” Nobomi lamented, pulling T’Challa from his thoughts. “ And I need to finish all this studying for royal lessons before my Baba starts lecturing me again”

T’Challa scowled at that, he didn’t think he lectured. He just tried to stop her from falling behind.

“ He can’t be that bad, your Baba has always seemed very cool to me” Fatou offered, T’Challa stood very still waiting for Nobomi’s response.

“ He isn’t cool, at least not like before, overbearing is his normal mode. He is always in my business, asking questions I don’t want to answer.”

“ My Baba can be like that too, it must be part of being an old man” T’Challa’s scowl returned as the girls shared a laugh, he was not old. If anything, he looked younger than he actually was.

He didn’t have time to think about it further when his four year old son came running into his arms, exposing T’Challa to the girls.

He picked up the little boy, holding him close and kissing his head “ Hello Lani, how was school today?”

“ Boring, we didn’t get to go outside for recess” before he could respond, the energetic little boy was jumping out of his arms and running over to where his sister was working.

“ Bulelani, don’t touch” she murmured, moving her books out of reach of her brother.

“ Hello girls, studying hard I see”

“ We were before we were interrupted” Nobomi peered up at her father with a slight frown. He went over to kiss her forehead and she reluctantly let him.

“ Hello Kumkani, we were actually almost done, I think” Fatou started packing up her own books.

“ That’s good, I think dinner is almost ready, Fatou, will you be joining us”

“ Oh no, we have relatives visiting so I have to be home on time” She denied politely. T’Challa nodded peering down at Nobomi who was staring at him expectantly.

“ What?”

“Well can you and Lani give us a moment or something” Fatou chuckled as T’Challa placed his son on his shoulders before leaving the girls to finish their conversation before Fatou’s departure. All he could hear as he headed to the kitchen was the return of this Chuma boy that apparently would be calling Nobomi tonight.

So much seemed to be happening in his daughter’s life and he wasn’t invited to hear about any of it. He kissed Akina as he got to the kitchen, where he caught her putting the finishing touches on dinner. The woman had recently fallen with cooking, and no better audience than her little family.

“ I tried a new recipe today” she beamed at her husband as he put Lani on the ground. She noticed he wasn’t really listening, His ears were trying to catch whatever was being said in the other room.

“ Someone is being nosey” she smirked as she moved around him to get to the oven

“ I am not being nosey. I am just trying to actually know what is happening in my child’s life. It was easier when she was as small as Lani.”

“ I remember, back then you couldn’t get her to stop talking once she started” They shared a quiet laugh before Akina continued. “ But like I’ve told you, you have to let her come to you. Whatever it is you are trying to do right now is going to fail. Imagine she catches you listening”

She finally went over and placed a tray in his hand before pointing him to the dining table. He followed orders and helped her set the table, listening to Akina describe what she had made and how she found cooking to be a different type of art for her.

By the time that Nono had joined them and food was served, T’Challa spent every bite trying to think about a way to have Nobomi speak. Right now Lani was giving them a rundown of his whole school day and seemed to have no plans on stopping until Akina reminded him that he had to eat as well.

“ So, Nono, how is the dress coming along?” He said turning to her hopefully, Nono looked shocked that she was being spoken to.

“It’s going” she reluctantly offered. T’Challa turned to Akina for help.

“ Nono and I have been working tirelessly to make all the needed adjustments. It's some hard material to work with but we will get it” she said more to Nobomi as they shared a smile. The picky eater went back to turning her food on her plate. T’Challa resisted the urge to tell her to eat more, not wanting to lecture her.

“ Well I am very excited to see the dress, I am hoping for a sneak peak”

“ Well, I think that is up to Nobomi, and I believe she wants it to be a surprise” she looked at the teenager for confirmation.

“ You can see it the day of the formal, it’s just a reimagination of a dress you have seen before” she smiled at her Baba before looking at her beads and smiling even more at the notification that flashed. T’Challa noticed and immediately changed the conversation.

“ So, are you going with anyone to the formal”

“With her boyfriend!” Lani offered with a snicker

“ Shut up! I do not have a boyfriend” she threw her napkin in her brother’s direction.

“ I mean.. If you do that is totally fine -” T’Challa tried before Nobomi cut him off trying to end the embarrassment.

“ I don’t have a boyfriend!” she pushed her plate away and covered her face.

“ Maybe we should drop the conversation for now, love” Akina tried to catch T’Challa’s eyes.

“ I am just saying, I want you to feel comfortable bringing Chima here if you want.” Nono’s eyes went wide before squinting at her father. Akina shook her head and braced herself for Nono’s reaction.

“ You were listening to our conversation?! Is privacy a foreign concept in this family?!”

“ Well, not exactly, I was walking by and caught snippets” Nobomi immediately got up from the table. His eyes went to her barely touched meal. “ Nono, you’ve barely eaten anything. Let’s finish dinner”

“Babe, let her go” Akina finally said as Nono mumbled that she wasn’t hungry and left the room. The room went quiet as they tried to finish what was left of dinner.

“ Baba I think you made sissy mad” Bulelani commented as though his parents weren’t right there to witness everything.

“ Thank you for the notice, unyana wam.” T’Challa said with a hint of sarcasm his son was too young to detect.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

T’Challa laid awake, waiting for Akina to come to bed. She had gone to check up on Nobomi before bed. Nono finally decided to have dinner and was sharing some of how she was feeling to Akina. And of course, T’Challa was waiting patiently for the watered down version of that story.

He sat up as he heard Akina come in and watched her as she turned down the bed. “ Well?”

“ Let me get in the bed first, you have been so nosy today”

“ I am not nosy, it’s not easy being out of the loop, I barely know what happens in my own home anymore” he was frustrated. Akina felt a little bad for him, she crawled into the bed and wrapped her arms around her as best as she could.

“ You cannot bombard her with information like that, especially when you got it from snooping”

“ I know that now”

“She will come to you when she feels like she can. Just let her do so on her own time” He nodded reluctantly.

“Did she at least end up having dinner”

“ She did, and she told me that Chuma did call, nothing special was said but she looks forward to seeing him tomorrow at school.” Akina smiled, to see Nono who she met as this little girl, blossom into her own woman was more than excited to see.

“ When did we reach the point where Nono likes boys, my baby is growing way too fast.”

“ And you can’t do anything about it. Just let her try and figure it out and be there for her when you can.” Akina ended, getting comfy in the bed and turning off the light.

“ I know” he sighed, following suit.

“ And for the love of Bast, no more eavesdropping babe, you aren’t good at it” she said jokingly before kissing him in the dark.

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T’Challa was beginning to shut down the holographic map he had created for Nono’s history lesson on the battles of Wakanda. He didn’t want to ‘lecture’, as she had told Fatou. He was hoping a more interactive lesson would have him return to his status as a ‘cool’ Baba. Unfortunately for him, Nobomi was beyond late and the whole lesson would have to be postponed. He had gotten back into his own work when Nobomi stumbled in with her head held down.

T’Challa didn’t lift his head before saying, “ You are late. You’ve missed class actually”

His voice was stern but he didn’t think this was the time to be a laidback father.

“ I know, I’m sorry.” Nobomi said meekly, her nose sniffling as she spoke. His head shot up as soon as he heard the sadness in his daughter’s voice, he was met with an equally sad face as her lip quivered.

“What happened?” With concern written on his own face, he stood from his desk and immediately went towards his daughter. He placed his hands on each of her arms and tried to peer under at her face. Her eyes were closed as she tried not to cry. She hated crying, just like her mother had. T’Challa finally pulled her into a hug as she finally gave into her emotions and let her sobs come out.

They stood there for a while as he rubbed comforting circles on her back before finally pulling her to sit on the sofa with him. He reached for tissues and allowed her to catch her breath.

“ Nono, what happened? What can I do to help” He spoke calmly taking her hands into his.

“ You’re going to think its stupid” she hiccupped closing her eyes again.

“If it matters to you, then it matters to me Nobomi wam. So whatever or whoever has you upset, we can work through together”

Nobomi looked up and was met with her father’s comforting smile. The same smile that always welcomed her when she had a scraped knee or a bad dream as a kid, and in that moment, she realized how much she needed it.

“ Talk to me” he tried one more time.

“ Well, you know about Chima and how he was supposedly wanting to ask me to the formal?”

“ Was he, I had no idea?” T’Challa feigned at the details, pretending like he hadn’t been aware. Nono shook her head at her father before continuing to speak.

“ Baba, come on”

“ Let’s move past that and you tell me the rest. So how did he ask you?”

“ He didn’t ask me, that’s the problem, I left class and Farai had basically our whole year crowded around her locker as she made a big deal of the note in her locker. Chima didn’t even make eye contact with me” she grabbed another tissue as she tried to keep another sob down.

“You really liked him didn’t you”

“ I did, and I didn’t want to get excited when Fatou told me, because no one ever likes me” Hearing that and seeing the emotion on her face broke him. He wanted to protect her from the opinions of the world but knew that was nearly impossible.

“ Eish Nono, don’t say that, you are a beautiful girl” he reached over and smoothed back the few hairs that had escaped her large puff.

“ It's not that, not many boys want to approach the ‘stuck up princess”

“ You are not stuck up” he refuted. “ And I have no idea why anyone would think that about you.”

“Because I’m the heir, and I don’t speak if I don’t have to. I don’t know, kids are weird”

“ That’s very true, your mother used to be quiet when she was your age.” he said with a smile

“Really” he nodded before speaking again.

“ Yes, strangely her silence was the loudest thing about her. It only made me want to get to know her more. And I am glad I did, because we had an amazing relationship and marriage. And then of course I had you, my firstborn” Nobomi for the first time matched his smile. “ And I know, whatever person takes the time to actually know you, will be as impressed as I am with the lovely young lady you are becoming.”

“ Thanks Baba” she went in for a hug and T’Challa welcomed her happily, as he started to think about how tiny she used to be, how she used to run around his office, filling it with her toys and stories she had made up on the spot. It was crazy to him how much time had passed and how different their conversations were now.

His little girl wasn’t so little anymore. And though it didn’t happen often, moments like this made him feel good to know that she could still open up to him when it was important. His role as a father was always challenging him, and Nobomi’s teenage years were his biggest yet, he would like to think he was doing well.

Nobomi chose to spend the rest of the afternoon in his office, as they worked side to side. It used to be her colouring and now she was writing full essays he was always excited to read. After a few hours, Nobomi got distracted by her beads and had been texting for quite a while before she scraped her throat to get her father’s attention.

“ So Chima says he is here, and he would like to see me” T’Challa tried to control the look of surprise on his face as he waited for Nobomi to further explain. “ He says he got the lockers confused and never meant to ask Farai out. I don’t know? What do you think I should do?”

She looked at her father expectantly. A part of him wanted to tell her to just go to the dance alone. But then he thought about all the silly mistakes his teenage self had made with her mother and even the few he still made with Akina.

“ I think you should go see what he has to say, but make him sweat a little bit” His comment earned him a giggle as she stood up to leave. “ Don’t be late for dinner”

“ I won’t” she ran out the door, and he had turned back to his work but lifted his head again to see Nobomi had returned.

“I just wanted to tell you that I love you Baba” she gave him that smile that reminded him so much of her mother.

“ I love you more Nobomi” he said before she exited again leaving him with a grin on his face.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hold still,” Akina mumbled as she did a few final stitches on Nono’s dress as she stood in it. Her hair and makeup was done and Nono was surprised that everything was pulling together as she wanted it to. Though she shouldn’t have ever doubted that Kiki would pull through for her. And now she was almost ready for Chima to come get her.

“ Kiki this looks amazing. You are amazing at what you do” Nono praised her step-mother as she admired herself.

“ It is not hard with an amazing model like yourself. Chima is going to die when he sees you” at the same time Bulelani ran in waiting for his sister’s attention.

“ Baba wants to know if he can come in now. “

“ I think we are just about done? Kiki what do you think?” she turned to look at Akina who stood up from the bottom of the dress.

“ I think he can come in now” Bulelani ran out the room and came back with his father holding his hand.

He took one look at Nobomi and he felt the tears coming.

“ Baba, you promised you wouldn’t cry!” Nono whined, trying to stop her own tears that her father’s emotions triggered. They were both too big softies that refused to admit it.

“ Nobomi you look beautiful, doesn’t she Lani” he asked his son.

“ She looks like a princess!” he exclaimed, making everyone laugh.

“ It’s a good thing she is actually a princess” he paused looking closely at the dress again. “ That was your mother’s dress wasn’t it?”

Nobomi nodded with a smile, doing a spin for her family.

He found himself getting emotional all over again. “ It is, I found it in a box of dresses she specifically wanted me to have. Kiki did an amazing job changing the big puffy sleeves that were there before and all the alterations to have it fit me.”

“ She did, though I expect nothing but wonders from her” he turned his attention to Akina who was smiling at him. He winked back at his wife before saying ‘ I love you’. They took a few pictures of Nobomi before T’Challa remembered that Chima had been waiting in the living room for Nobomi to join him.

“ Chima is here, I have already given him the appropriate scare, so I think you all should get going so you can have time for group pictures.”

Nobomi’s smile grew ten times at the just the sound of his name. And her quick movements to go where Chima was waiting made him chuckle. To be young and giddy by the idea of love, it was a unique experience that he was happy Nobomi got to experience. He watched as Chima’s own eyes grew large at the sight of Nono. For a second he seemed to struggle to get the words out, but he eventually did and Nobomi’s reaction proved he had said the right thing.

Akina and T’Challa held on to each other as they watched Chima place the corsage on her wrist, the both of them acting as though they were the only two in the room. They only clued back in when Lani came to stand in between them.

“ I think we are going to go now, no Dora’s alright” She said to her parents, her father immediately shook his head.

“ One Dora, she will be in civilian clothes and you come home by midnight” Nobomi put her hand out for her Baba to shake.

“ Deal, don’t be too sad without me okay” she said jokingly, taking Chima’s hand and leading him out the door.

“ Alright, be safe” he said watching her leave. He spent the rest of the night casually glancing at the clock waiting to see when Nobomi would be back. He couldn’t lie, he wanted to hear how her night went.

He found himself watching tv and snacking alone after Akina and Lani had gone to bed. He was sucked into the unsolved mysteries, he almost didn’t hear Nobomi come in.

It didn’t take long for her to follow the lights and flop down next to her father, her hand immediately going into the bowl of chips in his lap.

“ Did you wait for me?”

“You could say that, you are a bit late though?” he turned to look at her and saw that she had a big goofy smile on her face.

“ I know, I didn’t mean to. I was back here on time, but then me and Chima, we just started talking” she was speaking to him but he could tell her mind was still in the moment.

“ So you lost track of time, that’s okay. I am just glad that you had fun”

“ I did, I think that's the most the kids at school have seen me be myself I think.”

“ Well being surrounded by people, or someone in particular that allows you to be your true self”

“ Was that what it was like with Mama” She asked as she continued to snack.

“ Yes, except with her it felt like I was discovering a new part of myself I hadn’t known before her. Love is an interesting thing my darling”

“I hope I get to experience that one day” she yawned before resting her head on T’Challa’s shoulder, falling asleep quite quickly.

“ I hope you do too,” he whispered watching her for a moment just taking in the time he had with his little girl. Time seemed to be passing so quickly so every milestone seemed more precious than the last.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My Love,

Our little girl had her first school dance. She is growing up so fast and each day I can’t seem to wrap my head around the idea. I wish you could have seen how beautiful she looked. Especially in your dress, even though I had saved all those garments, seeing her in them brought up so many emotions. Moments like this made me miss you, so you could experience all these milestones with me. Though I know you are watching, I would have loved to see your smile as you saw her in the dress. Akina did such an amazing job with altering the dress to how Nono wanted it. I am really glad she has Akina in moments where she feels she can’t come to me. I have been really blessed to have her in my life and for the bond she was with Nono.

I am also glad that I got Nono to open up to me this week. Akina was right, I had to wait for her to come to me and she did. It was unexpectant, probably for her as well, but I think she was able to find comfort in my presence and that’s all I have wanted as a father. It makes me feel like I am doing my job correctly, and being a father is the most important job I could have. I just hope I am doing you proud and raising our child how you would have. As always, I know you are watching over us, I love you and miss you.

Yours forever,

T’Challa

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Taglist: @chaneajoyyy @aloevverified @shaekingshitup @ashanti-notthesinger @ghostfacekill-monger @fd-writes @abrunettefangirlnerd @raysunshine78 @yoyolovesbucky

#Letter's for my love #sunshinewrites #sarcasticsunshine #t'challa x reader

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sarcastic-sunshines · 4 years

Text

Letters for my Love - Chapter 7

Pairing: T’Challa x Black Reader

Chapter 1 I Chapter 2 I Chapter 3 I Chapter 4 I Chapter 5 I Chapter 6

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My love,

I don’t think I have the words to voice my fear. I am even afraid to write it in fear Bast may hear and bring them to life. This is supposed to be a more joyous moment. How do I deal with this all without feeling like this? Akina is pregnant, she is six months gone now, and the nervousness in the pit of my stomach has only grown with every passing day. We didn’t expect this to happen, it was a complete surprise, Akina says it is a miracle considering her medical history. It really was, the chances were so slim. I felt their heartbeat before she told me, I rested my head on her stomach, and I felt it, just as I had with Nobomi. Except this time I made myself believe it wasn’t what I thought it was, and I kept thinking so until her happy tearful face was staring right at me with the largest smile I have ever seen on her face. So I smiled back, and as happy as I was to know a child came from our love, the fear of losing her the way I lost you has been haunting me. She was scared at first too, she didn’t want us to tell anyone, but at soon as she made it to the second trimester and her morning sickness had passed, she couldn’t wait to tell her family.

Bast, she is so happy, and it only makes her glow even more throughout this pregnancy. Her excitement through all of this has made it difficult to share my concern with her. I want her to enjoy this moment, because despite how I feel it really is a special moment. I remember how excited you were through it all. Even with the back pain and swollen feet you still basked in the joy of being able to carry our child. And I hope to allow Akina the same chance, though I know she is already tired of my neurotic behaviour, I am just trying to be as careful as I can. But she and Nobomi are having fun putting the nursery together. It has been really nice to see how excited Nono has been for the new baby. She has even been picking names. Though they are only girl names so I’m interested to see how well that works for her. I’m just glad that they are both happy. I just wish I could put my fear aside and enjoy this moment with them. I’m just not sure if I could recover from this happening again... I just want her and the baby to be safe, that is all I ask.

Yours Forever,

T’Challa

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The kitchen was quiet, except the sound of Akina crunching on a pickle she had spread peanut butter on. Both Nobomi and T’Challa watched her from the other side of the island, as she moaned through eating what Nobomi was sure was the most disgusting combination yet.

“Why does the baby want you to eat that?!” 11 years old Nono asked as she gagged.

“If I could tell you I would, but all I know is that these two flavours are like magic in my mouth” she moaned as she took another bite while rubbing her round tummy.

Other than her husband waiting on her hand and foot, Akina’s favourite part of pregnancy was knowing their child was nestled safely within her. And their little one had started kicking, Akina lived for any movement she could feel that let her know her baby was happy and healthy.

“I still think this one is better than the soup on the ice cream,” T’Challa said with a shutter making Nono giggle while Akina frowned.

“I’m sorry our baby is making me eat strange things. Remember the baby I happen to be growing as the two of you laugh at my cravings and my waddle”

“I never mocked your waddle, that was Nono,” he said pointing at his daughter, who was offended at how quickly he jumped ship.

“Baba, that’s not fair, you were laughing until Kiki came into the room” he feigned ignorance as he approached his wife hoping to appease her with a kiss.

“For the record, I think your waddle is adorable” he placed a hand on her stomach and kissed her forehead. “And I am so grateful that you are carrying our child”

“Well you can show your gratitude by being on time for the appointment this time” he nodded as he tried to finish his coffee quickly to leave. “I will meet you there then”

“I thought we were going together?” he asked wearily.

“I have to go to a meeting on the other side of the city, so I will just meet you there, Nono go get your stuff so we can go” T’Challa waited for Nono to leave the room before speaking

“I just don’t like the idea of you going by yourself” Akina rolled her eyes, it was like since she became pregnant, the man didn’t think she was able to do anything by herself anymore.

“T’Challa I am not bedridden, it is a quick meeting about fabrics and I will be back here bored out of my mind since I am now made of glass according to you”

“That’s not fair, you know I am only trying to keep you healthy and safe,” he said softly, he looked over at Nobomi who came and kissed him goodbye before heading towards the door. He watched Akina carry her things slowly, to follow Nono out the door.

He came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her protruding belly. She rolled her eyes but relaxed in his arms.

“The doctors say everything is fine Love, so I just need you to worry a little less. I am very capable of taking care of me and the baby “ he didn’t say anything, he just held her, as though he was trying to memorize what that felt like.

“Okay, just be careful, and take the road with the least amount of traffic. And I will meet you at the doctor’s on time” he covered her face with kisses making her giggle.

“Yeah whatever,” she said as she turned in his arms “I love you,” she said kissing him, before finally moving to leave.

“I love you too,” he replied watching her waddle out the door. Once he heard the door close, he let all anxiety wash over him. He stood still trying to take deep breaths to get rid of the feeling in the pit of his stomach, just like every other day for the past six months, he hadn’t been able to get the feeling to fully disappear.

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He was on time as he promised, but now he was nervously pacing the doctor’s room, touching things that he wasn’t supposed to be touching. Akina watched from the bed with a slight frown. She has noticed how his demeanour had been changing over the course of the pregnancy. She had tried to ask him about it, but he only insisted that everything was fine and he was just being cautious.

“T’Challa” She called, breaking him out of his trance, he turned to her with a smile. “Love, can you come and sit next to me, please?” beckoned with her hand extended. He walked over slowly, finally sitting, though his knee bounced nervously.

Akina reached over taking his hand in hers. He finally looked over at her smile. He took a big breath, feeling calmer just looking at her, she rubbed her thumb over his hand soothingly.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, I’m just always a little nervous before the appointments.”

“What’s making you nervous?” He looked away not really sure how to form the words, he turned to look at her again, almost uttering the words that have been choking him for the past six months. Akina waited expectantly but her attention was soon on the door as the doctor entered with a smile.

“Hello again, how are you both doing today,” She said warmly while going towards the machine. She placed a small object on Akina’s belly as she waited for a response.

“We are all good, baby too. They’ve been very active this past week. “ She answered for both of them. T’Challa gave a small smile, still holding her hand, as he leaned on the bed.

A hologram opened above their heads, showing a 3D image of the baby as they sucked their thumb comfortably. Akina felt her eyes water, no matter how many appointments she had, she always got emotional.

She had made her peace with the fact that she would not be able to bring her own child into the world. It hurt at first, but she put all her emotions into her designs and found happiness in doing so.

She had thanked Bast for giving her a man with a child who she instantly fell in love with as though she was her own. She loved her relationship with Nobomi and was so glad she was able to have that even before meeting T’Challa. So when she opened up to him about her fertility issues, she was sure that was her closing that chapter of her life. He made it so clear that he just wanted her love and she was grateful for that.

But she would be lying if she didn’t admit how hopeful she was when she started to feel symptoms, how her excitement grew with every test that she took. Through her first trimester, she would visit the temple every day, giving offerings and praying Bast would allow her to hold her child this time. She would return home to T’Challa’s arms, and though he would remind her that whatever happened they would get through it together, she would still close her eyes tight and hoped Bast would bless her with one more favour.

Making it past the 12-week mark felt like a win, and every appointment she felt more connected to the little human she was growing. Her happiness only grew with every milestone, so it worried her a little that with every passing day T’Challa seemed to grow tenser and unsure of the whole situation. But once every two weeks, they would look up at the hologram of their child and she could see the joy in his face. For that brief moment, his gleefulness made her feel like everything would be fine.

This time was no different, he was so enamoured by the picture, he kept smiling down at her before looking back up at their baby.

“Okay, so as you can see, the baby is nice and healthy and doing everything he is supposed to be doing”

“He?” T’Challa said with a smile

“I’m so sorry Kumkani, I know you didn’t want to know. It was a slip of tongue” The doctor apologized profusely.

“It’s fine, we were going to ask anyway,” Akina replied excitedly. She turned to T’Challa with a smile that he mirrored.

“We are having a boy, that’s amazing” She found herself tearing up again “All of this feels like a dream.”

He smiled at her, reaching over to wipe the happy tears that always followed each appointment. The doctor pulled their attention, offering some routine advice and promising to see them in the coming two weeks. T’Challa asked again if everything looked okay for both mother and child. Akina shook her head as he did so, hoping it calmed his nerves as she did each appointment. Akina waited for the door to close before getting back up and putting on her pants. T’Challa stood awkwardly, waiting for her. She finished and walked towards him, taking his hands in hers.

“Is there something that you wanted to tell me earlier” she looked at him, the joy from the appointment still stood all over her face. He couldn’t bring himself to take away the joy with his own worries.

“No, everything is fine, as long as you and our son are healthy, I am fine,” he said with a genuine smile, he began to lead them out of the appointment room.

“A boy, can you believe, and to think we get to meet him in just three more months” she spoke excitedly as they walked out. He tried to focus on her words, but his fear began to crowd his mind again.

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There was a calm silence as T’Challa gazed at the garden area. He had decided to join Akina for lunch outside. They had ordered out at her favourite restaurant, so he ate quietly as he listened to her talk about some designs she had drawn for a maternity line she had begun when she found out she was pregnant.

He nodded along, slightly distracted thinking about how much his life would be changing again to accommodate the arrival of their son. He felt more like he had to prepare his heart to do so, than anything else. He was brought out of his thoughts by Akina who grabbed his arm.

“Did you hear me, love?” She asked, trying to get his attention.

“I’m sorry entle, what did you say”

“I said, I think I am going to go to Jabariland next week, M’baku’s wife told me about this adorable baby shop, I think it would be nice. And there is a fabric store there I haven’t been to in a while and I definitely want to make something for the baby before he gets here.”

T’Challa slowly let go of her hand and began to lean on his chair while his features seem to harden a little.

“I don’t think I am comfortable with you going,” he said more like a command, rather than a concern he was sharing. Akina’s reaction made it clear she did not appreciate his tone.

“I didn’t realize I had to seek your approval to do things now” She countered, her annoyance rising.

“You know that isn’t what I am saying, I just don’t think it is safe for you to be travelling such distances. I just don’t want you to be stressed, and we all know how tiring travel can be sometimes” he tried again, this time with a softer tone. Akina noticed he had begun to bounce his knee with nervousness.

“Well, my doctor said it is fine, and I will only be going for the day, by dinner time I will be back” she tried to reassure him, she reached for his hand again, only for him to pull away. The hormones in her body began to make her feel irritated by his actions.

“What has been going on with you lately?! Your emotions are more up and down than me who is actually pregnant. One minute you are super protective, the next you are distant. All I know is that I don’t want either one”

“Well, I’m sorry if you can’t see the possible danger you are putting you and my son into” his reply was cold and harsh. Akina stood still for a moment, he had never spoken to her like that and it hurt. He couldn’t look at her, but he knew his words had hurt her. He finally turned when he saw her begin to get up.

“You know this is my child too right? Furthermore, you have no right to talk to me like that! When you are ready to be an adult and have a conversation, you know where to find me” she said with a shaky voice. She finished gathering her things and turned to leave.

“So much for keeping my stress levels down,” she murmured as she walked past him. Immediately the guilt began to eat him up. He tried to grab her hand to pull her back, but she swatted him away and kept going. Leaving him in the garden with his own thoughts.

He knew he hadn’t been the most loving towards her lately. His emotions had clearly been reflected in his actions, despite his attempt to keep his fears from her. He had spent the last few months trying to protect her as much as he could, while also trying to protect himself from the pain that could possibly come in the next months. He had failed at both, while hurting Akina in the process, and that was the last thing that he wanted.

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Their home was quiet, he looked at the time and thought about the giggles he was used to hearing when he came in. He walked through the halls, trying to make his presence known, he turned and knocked on Nobomi’s door, waiting for her voice before letting himself in.

“Hey Baba, how was your day?” she said with a smile. Immediately seeing his little girl’s face, brightened his mood. He mirrored her smile, pulling a chair to sit next to her. He watched her do a math formula for her a moment on a holographic worksheet.

“I had a long day, but it’s better now that I get to see you, what are you working on?”

“Trigonometry, it is kind of easy,” She says zooming through the worksheet.

“Have you eaten yet?” he asked, pointing to a question she had gotten wrong

“Yeah, Kiki ordered something” she stared at the question trying to see where she had gone wrong.

“ And where is she?”

“She is asleep I think, she wasn’t really hungry and said she wanted to be alone.” Finally, she erased her work, seeing where she had gone wrong, before looking at her father to see if she had made the right correction. He nodded with a smile as he scanned the rest of the sheet to make sure she was on the right track. “ I think she is upset with you, at least that is what it sounded like when she told Adanna on the phone.”

“Yeah, I may have hurt her feelings today” he admitted “I know I’ve been acting strange lately, and I’m sorry for that,” he said slowly as he smoothed out her hair.

“That’s okay, I just thought you were scared about having another girl in the house” He let out a laugh.

“Actually, I am nervous about having another baby, but Nono you are having a brother” he laughed at the look of shock on her face.

“I mean, I guess I can make it work,” she said with a little smile, he rose from his seat and kissed the top of her head.

“You are going to have to, I cannot wait to read your new baby name list,” he says leaving, smiling until he reached outside his bedroom door. He entered slowly looking around for his wife, he looked towards the balcony and saw the curtain flowing, he headed towards the door, peeking his head, and finding his lover sitting and sketching under the sunset.

She felt his presence but made no move to acknowledge him. He walked over and bent down to kiss her, Akina turned her head forcing him to kiss her cheek. He made no comment, but he sat next to her, letting her continue to be silent for a moment before turning his body to fully face her.

“Akina my love, can we please talk,” he asked softly

“I don’t know T’Challa, are you ready to have a mature conversation with me,” she said, turning to face him, putting her sketchbook down. He tried to take her hand, but she pulled it out of his reach. She looked at him expectantly.

“ Kiki, first I am sorry for talking to you like that today, you didn’t deserve that. I obviously have my own fears right now surrounding us bringing this child into the world. And I have no right to throw my fears on you like that. I am so sorry entle, really ” he said trying to grab her eyes.

“ You made me feel like I wasn’t fit enough to protect our child. I already have that worry every day, just hoping my body is able to do its job and I am able to keep our baby healthy and safe until they are ready to join us. The last thing I need is my partner making me feel like he doesn’t think I am capable of doing so.” She felt herself getting emotional, even though that wasn’t the plan.

“You are right, my response was thoughtless and it was selfish for me to do so” reaching over to catch the few tears that had escaped.

“But why have you been acting this way. You know you can share anything with me right?” He felt his chest get heavy, he had been keeping it to himself for a long time. Saying it felt like giving it life, and that is the last thing he wanted to do. But he stared at Akina’s smiling face and felt like he owed her all of his heart, whether good or bad. She reached out and took his hand in hers finally. As usual, her thumb over his hand made him feel calm.

“You know, the last time I did this, I lost Nono’s mother. And even as the years have passed, it is still one of the most painful things to happen to me” he felt his voice shake and paused to steady himself. And as happy as I am to have this opportunity, I am ridden with fear, that I will be left alone again with a crying infant in my arms as I mourn the passing of their mother.” she pulled him into her shoulder as she let him release every emotion he had been feeling for the past six months.

She rubbed his back soothingly, whispering “ I am not going anywhere, we are going to do this together”

“You don’t know that” he sniffled

“I do, I just feel it in my bones, I know Bast has a long journey for the both of us. So as long as you aren’t tired of me, I am not going anywhere.” He lifted himself to look at her, “ We will do this together”

She could tell he looked skeptical of words, “ I am going to keep reminding you no matter what. But if the words I am saying don’t ever feel like enough, I know there must be something that will give you a sense of peace for the next three months.

He paused for a second, feeling as though at this point, he could share just about anything with her.

“Sometimes I write these letters,” She nodded waiting for him to finish “ They are addressed to Nobomi’s mother” He stopped to see her reaction. She smiled sadly, but he knew she understood, there was no malice or uncomfortably in her expression.

“ I used to write more of them when she had just passed, it was cathartic, and it felt like I could always feel her, let her know how Nono was doing. Over the years, they became more of a diary for myself, a way of just writing down whatever I was feeling, I even wrote about you” he said with a smile she returned, wiping away the few tears left on his face.

“I’ve been doing it less since we got married because I wanted to be able to share my worries with you. This time was different though, you are so happy. And I know how much this means to you, I didn’t want my fears to creep in and ruin your happiness, but it is like I was doing it anyway. “

“I know you didn’t mean to, love. But if writing your letters makes you feel better, then that’s okay. You can always still share your worries with me, I just don’t want you to look back at this time and to think about the fear that you were feeling rather than the happiness.” he nodded as she moved as close to him as her bump would let him.

“ No matter what, we are going to do this together,” She repeated as she kissed him softly, holding him close to her. Hearing it over and over, allowing for him to begin to believe it.

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My Love,

I am so happy, who knew my heart could experience a love like this, even after Nobomi. But looking down at her little brother is something I never imagined doing but I am so thankful to Bast for allowing me this opportunity. Everyone says he looks like me, but he has Akina’s smile for sure. Speaking of, she hasn’t stopped smiling since he came into the world, and she can’t seem to put him down either.

Everything was going well at the end of her pregnancy. She was a lot more irritable but I expected that which made me think of you. Everything happened so quickly when she went into labour though, it was like the little boy could not wait any longer. I could feel my nerves through the whole thing, it only got worse hearing Akina scream through the pain. But she is so strong and so determined. I have never admired her more than I did at that moment. And when he finally came out with his own screams, it was like the world stopped. I could barely hear or see anything but the two of them. It was so surreal. But he is here now, and both of them are doing well and that is all I wanted. I don’t think I could ask Bast for anything more.

Yours Forever,

T’Challa

P.S. His name is Bulelani, it means to be thankful. His sister picked it. I think it is very fitting since his arrival has been nothing but a blessing. And he is so lucky, he has the most amazing big sister one could ask for.

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#Letter's for my love #sunshinewrites #sarcasticsunshine #t'challa x reader

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sarcastic-sunshines · 4 years

Text

Just For This Moment - Part 3

Author’s Note: First of all, Happy New Year! It has been a trying start to the new year, but I am back on here and writing again. Hopefully, I can keep the creative juices flowing because I have some great ideas I can’t wait to share with y’all 😊😊 Clearly I am a liar because I said I was done with this story but I couldn’t let it go. So I hope you all enjoy what will be the real final installment of Kisi’s story.

Part 1 I Part 2 I Masterlist

________________________________________________________________The room was filled by Kisi’s soft hum as she fed her baby. It was her favourite time, just her and her precious gift, Ezinne. She wasn’t much bigger than when Kisi had brought her into the world a month ago. It had been a long and painful labour. Kisi was sure she had never experienced such pain in her life before, and right now, as she still healed, she wasn’t sure if she ever wanted to do so again. But she didn’t think about that as much. Just like the moment, she came into the world, Ezinne’s presence made her forget everything else in her life. She just stared at the gift Bast had given her.

Right when all felt hopeless, Ezinne had arrived to give Kisi a reason to smile. She now understood why her mother obsessed with her and her siblings so much. The baby’s small gurgles brought a smile to her face. Kisi slowly pulled her breast from Ezinne’s sleeping body and covered herself. She didn’t want to put her down, but to let her daughter get too comfortable sleeping in her arms would only do both of them a disservice in the future.

She got up from the rocking chair, walking the length of the large nursery, placing the baby in the bassinet. She stared over for some time, completely enamoured. If not for the tap on her shoulder, she would have never heard the Dora standing behind her.

“Lady Kisi, I am sorry, but your presence is wanted in the throne room.” Kisi’s perfect bubble had been burst, back to the complex realities she had to deal with when she wasn’t spending her time taking care of her daughter. She kissed her child one more time before following the Dora out the door.

“Aneka,” Kisi asked softly, “ is there any way you can let me know when my mother arrives?” Aneka nodded as they walked down to the throne room. Kisi wasn’t used to her new life as the King’s betrothed yet. The palace walls still felt foreign to her, despite her being there for over three months. She placed her hand on the little bump that still remained from her pregnancy, hoping to calm her nerves. She walked with her eyes darted to the ground, trying to avoid the curious stares she still received.

When T’Challa had said she would no longer be a secret, he meant every word. Two weeks after their discussion, he came over again announcing he and Nakia had already started the divorce process and council had requested to formally meet her. After that, everything had happened so fast. Between telling her parents and facing the mixed reception from T’Challa’s royal court, Kisi had been stressed out during her last semester.

Every night, T’Challa would try and convince her that everything was going to be okay. But his words were competing with the harsh comments she read online coming from across the country. Without even knowing her face yet, people had decided she was the villain in the story. Although she didn’t blame them for thinking so, she also wanted them to know she wouldn’t have been going through all this ordeal if she didn’t love T’Challa as deeply as she did. So she had learned to let his words be the shield she needed during her last few months. She let him do most of the talking while she focused on keeping her blood pressure low and her baby healthy. As usual, when she was alone with him, she was able to pretend none of her stressors existed.

But despite the turmoil that was her life, she was grateful for it all, because, without it, she was sure he wouldn’t have been in the hospital with her rubbing her back and holding her hand as she brought their child into the world. It was during those moments, Kisi was able to remind herself what was most important. So, as she walked down the hall to the throne room, she thought of her daughter and remembered she deserved to have her father in her life. Times like this were the sacrifices she would have to make to ensure Ezinne was able to be with the man who fell in love with her before he ever met her.

The large doors opened, and Kisi was met with the faces of the elders and Ramonda. Kisi almost didn’t notice Nakia. She wasn’t sitting in her normal spot next to T’Challa. Kisi soon realized that that was the only open spot. That was where she belonged. She saluted everyone but stared only at T’Challa’s smiling face. He got up and took her hand, leading her to her seat.

“It was about time you joined us, Lady Kisi,” the River Elder spoke with a slight scowl. “We were simply wondering when you felt it would be time to formally introduced the King’s second heir to the nation as well as perform the ceremonies for your marriage.”

It just dawned on Kisi that she had barely thought of any of that. Very soon, she would have to stand tall in her choices and she wasn’t sure she was ready to do so yet. She turned to T’Challa to have him speak for the both of them.

“Perhaps we could do the wedding within the next month and Ezinne may have her traditional birthright performed two weeks after that,” he suggested, looking at Kisi who nodded along. They had already discussed the matter when they were alone, but somehow being in a room filled with people who didn’t like her very much made it hard to speak.

“That being said, you then begin your duties as Queen after both events.” Kisi was a little shocked at the swiftness she would be forced to leave her baby.

“I was hoping to have more time with my baby… Maternity leave is a year and a half,” she stated skeptically, looking at T’Challa.

“Well life as a royal is much different and you are blessed to have several caretakers at your hands,” the merchant elder replied with a side-eye.

“Well, I was guaranteed the first six months and it was something I benefited from greatly. I am sure Kisi would be appreciative of the same thing,” Nakia responded swiftly maintaining a smile as she stole glances at a nervous Kisi.

“I was about to say a similar thing. Thank you, Nakia.” T’Challa smiled warmly at her and she returned the gesture, though the smile didn’t quite reach her eyes. “It is only fair that Kisi is eased into everything. I will make sure to help her with any duties that come along over the next few months. I am sure the rest will work itself out.” His voice left no room for discussion.

Kisi looked at the few disgruntled faces T’Challa’s decree left. Kisi made eye contact with Nakia before she moved her gaze to the ground. She began to tune out all the voices around her. They had moved onto another topic making her presence at this point a formality. She wasn’t ready for this life. It was like the protective bubble T’Challa had been keeping her in over the last few months had begun to burst. She didn’t know how to deal with rapid change. She began to miss her bungalow, her little piece of earth that allowed her to escape the stressors of the world.

By the time she lifted her head again, the meeting had been adjourned. Everyone had begun to leave the throne room. T’Challa turned to her, took her hand and held her gaze with a soft smile.

“I know it was all very intense but with time it will get easier,” he tried to reassure her. She let a small smile spread across her face as she nodded along with his words. Kisi did not feel like this was the place or time to share her discomfort with him. He kissed her hand promising to see her later in the evening before turning to leave the grand hall. Before she knew it, it was just her and Nakia.

She hadn’t realized that the woman had been waiting for a chance to speak to her. They hadn’t spoken to each other once during the transition. Any messages had been passed along through T’Challa. Kisi bounced from one foot to another before finally opening her mouth to speak.

“I just want to start by saying thank you for defending me during the meeting, I haven’t found my voice here yet.” Kisi felt her hands flailing around as she struggled to get the words out. She was nervous, even with her hands together, her nervousness still found a way to twiddle her thumbs.

“Every mother should be allowed time with her baby. Leaving Anathi every day is still a struggle so I understand your reservation” Nakia gave another small smile, this time Kisi could see the sadness she had caused up close and personal. She felt the guilt creeping up her body, just as it had every time T’Challa had left his pregnant wife to warm her bed instead.

“Nakia, I wanted to apologize -”, Nakia raised her hand before letting out a dry chuckle.

“You know, I wanted to hate you. I really did. I searched for every little detail that I could use to justify my hatred,” Nakia spoke slowly, ignoring the shake in her voice. “But I quickly realized I couldn’t hate you. You have always been a lovely person Kisi. And despite everything that happened, there is no way you could have stolen what was never mine.”

Nakia wiped away at the few tears that had escaped.

“If anything, I resent you for being everything that I couldn’t give to him. We both knew that this marriage was built on political ties, but he was my friend, and I wanted it to work. So I put in the time and I fell in love with the man that was chosen for me. I was comfortable living like that. And he was too until you arrived.”

“I didn’t mean to-”

“No one means to fall in love, Kisi, but T’Challa did. His aura changed when you started seeing each other. It wasn’t hard to notice. I tried to pretend I didn’t notice him slipping away. I thought if I kept pretending, he would too. But he didn’t and yes, it hurts, but it was foolish of me to assume this wouldn’t have been a possibility.”

“Just know I wouldn’t be doing all of this if I didn’t love him as much as I did,” Kisi spoke slowly. Nakia nodded with every word, no longer trying to catch her fallen tears.

“I hope one day when this all hurts less, we can be friends, at least for the sake of our children”

“ I hope so too. Please, know if there was a way for me to have done this without you hurting I would have.” Nakia looked down as she smoothed out her clothes as a distraction.

The hall doors opened again with Aneka marching through. “Lady Kisi, your mother has arrived.”

Kisi nodded taking a step to leave. Nakia turned to look at her again, her small smile still painted on her face.

Kisi left the hall feeling awful. She began to wonder if the ends truly justified the means. She had caused so much confusion, and she wasn’t sure if she would ever be done paying the debt of her actions.

She pushed her thoughts aside as she entered the nursery. Instantly she felt happier seeing Ezinne in her mother's hands. She closed the nursery doors, pausing for a second to take a deep breath, before turning away from the doors.

She walked over and kissed the baby’s head before greeting her mother.

“Darling, where have you been?”

“At a council meeting… I am expected to attend them now,” she said slowly, never taking her eyes away from her daughter. “But today I, of course, was the main subject. We will be getting married in a few weeks, then we will have Ezinne’s ceremony. That will be exciting.” Kisi smiled softly as she tidied a few items in the nursery.

She snuck a peek at her mother’s face and saw the frown that was settled on her features. Kisi pulled the small ottoman closer to the rocking chair her mother sat in. It was about time they had the conversation that was bubbling in her mother’s chest since she had finally told her family who Ezinne’s father was.

“Alright, Mama, say what you have been dying to say.” Kisi waited patiently as her mother looked at Ezinne before speaking.

“Kisi, you know I worry about you sometimes.”

“Trust me, Mama, I know.” She looked away trying to stop the eye roll she felt coming.

“I am serious. I never said anything because I didn’t want to make the end of your pregnancy more stressful than it already was. But this man, King or not, the drama he has caused in your life is just too much. Now, he has practically thrown you to the wolves. The way the media has been speaking about you.” She paused to look down at the baby who was turning in her sleep. She looked back up at her daughter. “I just want to make sure you actually want to do this. There is still time to turn away. You can always come and stay with your father and me.”

“Mama, I am not going anywhere. I am struggling, I will not lie. It is so much all at once but I am more than willing to do it if it means Ezinne having her father in her life.”

“It is not just about Ezinne having a father Kisi. T’Challa has proven that will always be a given. He is a great father, I will give him that. But what about you? Are you happy?”

“I am,” she stated honestly, “because I get to be with the man I love, and that is the only reason I am going through this whole ordeal. I love T’Challa so much, Mama. He makes all my fears disappear.”

“And does he love you as hard as you do? What if he does the same thing to you that he did Nakia, then what?” Kisi paused for a second. She couldn’t lie, the thought had been creeping into her head more and more. She just wanted to make sure she was doing this all for the right reasons. She wanted so badly to believe that she was.

“Mama, I trust him. I trust him with all my heart. I know it sounds stupid to say, but I need to believe that it will all be fine.” Her mother stared at her intensely. Kisi recognized the look. It was the same one she gave Ezinne. Her mother just wanted to protect her from any pain that could come her way.

“Okay, my darling,” her mother finally spoke. She used her free hand to take Kisi’s hand, squeezing it tight. “Just know I will be here for you, no matter what. As long as you are happy, then I am too.”

“Thank you, Mama.” Her mother smiled finally, returning her gaze to Ezinne.

“I remember when you were this small. I would hold you for hours.” Kisi smiled as her mother began one of her elaborate stories. She was thankful for the distractions from her own thoughts.

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He watched her slowly get ready for bed, taking in her full form while she stood by her vanity. He could see the concern written all over her face. He waited for her to climb into bed with him. She situated herself under the covers. He was watching her every move.

“Talk to me, love, tell me what’s wrong.” He reached under the covers wrapping his long arm around her body. “Whatever it is, we can work through it together.”

“I’m just worried about everything… Are you sure we are making the right choice? And not just for us, but for everyone?” His touch on her skin was so soft. She tried to focus on that, instead of her anxious thoughts.

“I think we are doing the best we can do? There was no way we could have done this any better. But I promise it will all calm down very soon, I promise you.” He leaned down to kiss her. Her solemn face still met him when he opened his eyes. She smiled less these days, understandably, but he did miss it.

She played with the seam of the cover before looking up at him and daring to say what had really been buried in her thoughts.

“T’Challa, I am giving so much of myself up for this relationship, I just want to make sure you know that.” He looked at her confused.

“What do you mean Kisi?” Now, she struggled to blink the tears away.

“I mean I love you so much, T’Challa, that I am willing to put up with all of this because I love and trust you with my heart, and I just hope you are as committed as I am in this relationship.”

She looked at him expectantly. He couldn’t blame her. They didn’t fall in love in the most organic way, but that didn’t stop his heart from constantly telling him how strongly he felt for her. It was like every day his love only grew stronger. So for the first time ever, he was ready to scream how much he loved her, and he didn’t care who heard or whether they agreed because all that mattered was her, and the life they were going to build together.

“Kisi Addo, I love you so much it hurts. I have known that for so long. It was almost immediate with you. Although our journey was not easy, I would do it all again as long as it meant I can tell you how much I love you for the rest of my life. Even then, I don’t think I would be able to fully express how much I love you.”

He saw her smile come through. It made him feel good to know that he could have the opportunity to make her smile.

“I just want to make sure you aren’t going anywhere,” she said quietly, turning her body to fully face him.

“Why would I go anywhere when my soulmate is right next to me?” She didn’t respond. Instead, she placed her hand on his cheek. He placed a soft kiss on her forehead before smiling along with her. “If you have any other doubts, I promise to do my best to get rid of them, just give me the chance to show you, Kisi.”

She turned around in his arms so he could spoon her “You can do all that tomorrow okay, love. Just hold me for now”

“Of course, my love.” She took the hand around her and kissed it. She let his words and his touch soak into her soul, calming her worries allowing her to believe that everything would be fine. Any doubts and fears could be pushed aside for the new day. Just for this moment, she would pretend his love was enough to block out any obstacle in their way. She could avoid everything coming her way, but she believed he would always hold her hand through it all. She couldn’t ask for more. He was all that she wanted.

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Taglist:

@chaneajoyyy @aloevverified @ghostfacekill-monger @shaekingshitup

@fd-writes @twistedcharismaaa @thadelightfulone @raysunshine78

#OC #sarcasticsunshine #sunshinewrites #Part 3 #Just for this Moment

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sarcastic-sunshines · 4 years

Text

Just For This Moment

Author’s Note: I hope everyone is doing great! I wrote a little something in between winter and school kicking my ass lol. It wouldn’t leave my head so here it is. As always, I hope you enjoy it and I can’t wait to know what you all think. (And Happy Turkey Day for all my Americans)

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Her alarm went off, but the sun and the chirping of the birds had woken her up over an hour ago. Kisi didn’t mind though, it just meant she could appreciate being in his arms for a little while longer. The alarm meant there was no more time to bask at the moment. She let the blanket fall from her body as she made a move to sit at the edge of the bed, reaching over to finally turn off the alarm on her beads. She felt his arm finding it’s way around her waist, making her smile. His groans grew louder while he struggled to pull her back into the bed.

“Good morning to you too love” she stood up with a stretch, turning to see him looking at her drowsily.

“Kisi, come back to bed”

“You realize it’s Monday right? So I have to go to work. And last I checked, you have a job to get to as well” with an eye roll, he moved to her side of the bed, grabbing his trousers from the floor

He followed her into the closet wrapping his arms around her, her smile returned, she suddenly forgot about the outfit she was putting together in her head and allowed herself to melt in his arms. His lips on her neck made it so easy to forget reality, his arms pulled her in tight, running down her waist, the feeling was intoxicating. If not for the notification on her beads, she would have let him have what he wanted. She turned in his arms kissing him one last time before moving to the side.

“Love, I am serious, I can’t be late, I have a meeting with the Queen Mother this morning and I’ve barely gone over my notes.” She finally laid out a look on her bed she felt comfortable with.

“I hate Mondays, they force me back into the reality of life and, I have to leave you” he pouted, picking up his shirt and pulling it over his head. He walked into the bathroom to brush his teeth, a frown still resting on his head. She came up behind him, it was her turn to wrap her arms around his and hold him tight to her body. They looked at their reflections in the mirror for a moment, she kissed his cheek allowing her smile to be contagious, his own growing slowly.

“Think of it this way, reality makes moments like this more special, perhaps even more worthwhile.” Kisi kissed his cheek once more before turning towards the shower. He watched through the mirror as her nightgown pooled at her feet, exposing the smoothness of her bareback. He followed the movement of her curves as she entered the shower. A mischievous smile grew on his face once he rinsed his mouth.

“Do you need help in there, in case you can’t reach your back or any other service you need to help you start the day” She held a scowl, popping her face out of the en suite shower.

“What I need is you gone by the time I’m out of here” He ran towards her, stealing a kiss before he left.

“I love you Kisi, see you later on okay!” he shouted as he left her home, she waited for the sound of the door before she closed the shower door with an uncontrollable smile on her face.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So I will send over the paperwork, and we can decide which hospitals will be able to test out the program before it goes nationwide” Kisi spoke, rising from her seat waiting for Queen Mother to do the same.

“That sounds best. All I ask is that the test run in at least one major city per tribal region, this includes the Jabari Lands if Lord M’baku permits it.”

“Of course Queen Mother” Queen Mother walked Kisi to the hall, at the same time Ramonda smiled when she saw her son and nephew coming towards her. Kisi turned to look at what had brightened her mood before turning back and holding her composure. She felt the eyes of both men on her, though Erik’s lingered a moment too long.

“There is my favourite auntie,” Erik said engulfing Ramonda in his arms. She smiled before playfully hitting his arm so she could hug T’Challa.

“How are you doing, mother”

“Amazing now that I have seen you two, I take it your trip to Birnin Kashin was successful”

“More than, things went so great, I thought we could’ve been back yesterday, but plans change you know” Erik shared a smirk with T’Challa who rolled his eyes,

“So much for being gentlemen” Ramonda frowned at her nephew before speaking again, “Well T’Challa I am sure Nakia was very happy to see you, she missed you very much.”

“Yes, it was lovely to come home to a smiling face” T’Challa turned to face Kisi, Ramonda noticed and suddenly remembered what she had been doing before the conversation.

“I am so sorry Kisi, boys this is Kisi Addo, she works with the health minister, we just left a very productive meeting. “ Kisi offered a salute to both royals before speaking

“I have had the pleasure of working with the King and the prince before.”

“Yes she has, she was apart of the process of expanding neonatal centers among the smaller villages closer to the southern border. And I believe we will be working together again if I am correct”

“Yes, for Prince Erik’s international mental health initiative,” She stated with a smile

“Can’t wait to start, also get to know you better, I mean your work ethic of course” Erik stated not as sly as he had intended.

“It will be very interesting, to say the least,” her eyes said more than her words did “ It was nice to see you both again, Queen Mother, we shall be in contact very soon” She ended with a final salute before turning and leaving.

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“Mama, absolutely not. I don’t care if you met him at the temple or not, I really do not need all this right now”

Kisi picked at her sandwich, her appetite was mostly gone since beginning a conversation with her mother that she had been having repeatedly since her thirtieth birthday. It was like her mother could not wait any longer to attend her wedding and hold her foot as she brought her grandchild into the world. Kisi was hoping one of her siblings would save her and distract their mother with their own growing families.

It wasn’t just her mother who was stealing her appetite. The sandwich had gotten soggy before lunchtime and she had started to regret promising herself she would make more of an effort to cook from home. She was barely listening to the never-changing rant her mother was giving her. Her mind was on the suya food truck she would be going to once she dropped the phone. Her mouth was already salivating at the thought of the spicy meat, she was busy deciding which side she wanted when her mother’s surprising words brought her out of her head.

“I’m sorry mama, what did you say?”

“I said if you aren’t going to let me set you up, at least tell me about this young man who seems to be frequenting your bed”

“H-how do you-?” Kisi’s heart begun to beat quickly. They had been careful, or so she thought.

“Madame Yemi told me” her mother ended her stammering

“Who?”

“The elderly woman who lives two doors down. I spoke to her before our dinner last week. She just mentioned she was happy to see you had finally found someone. That you weren’ as much of a hermit as she thought you were.”

“Well, Madam Yemi needs to mind her business.” her mother could hear the scowl in her voice.

“Kisi, she is just being friendly”

“And mama I don’t appreciate you spying on me if I want to tell me about this person, trust me when I say I will.”

“Is it a crime for a mother to show interest in her daughter’s life. Life is not just all work you know.” it was Kisi’s turn to hear the scowl she knew was painted on her mother’s face. It was mixed with a little guilt-tripping that made Kisi roll her eyes, at the same time she saw Nakia standing in front of her with an amused smile.

“I know Mama, and I appreciate your concern. I have to go alright” her mother reluctantly let her go. Kisi finally put her full attention to the Queen.

“I am sorry Kumakikazi, my mother tends to go on with no end. How may I help you? “ Nakia waved the comment off, taking the empty chair across Kisi.

“No need to apologize, I am the one interrupting your lunch. I was supposed to meet you this morning since I will be apart of the prenatal pilot program with Queen mother.” Kisi shook her head with recognition.

“She did mention that. It is a pleasure to have you on board, and I would love to catch you up whenever you are available” Nakia smiled warmly

“Thank you, that would be amazing. I was taking a walk in the garden when I saw you. I really just came over here to introduce myself and to apologize for missing this morning. My husband decided to take up all my time now that he is back” Nakia stated with a knowing face. Kisi smiled robotically, she had heard the Queen was very much an open book, but she didn’t expect her to be so cheeky in their first interactions. Nakia soon realized how strong she came across.

“I am sorry, was that too much, I was just basing it off your phone call”

“No, it’s fine, if my mother can talk about my love life with neighbours I barely know, then who’s to say the Queen and I cannot make jokes” they shared a smile, making Nakia relax back in the chair

“Well, I have very little advice, considering my whole marriage was based on an arrangement,” she said getting up “But I will say, it is okay to take your time and not expect fireworks immediately. Love can be built over time, I think you and whomever they are will be fine either way.”

“Is that what you did with the King, built the love” Nakia nodded with a smile.

“He was my friend before he was anything else. And no we may not be soulmates decided by Bast herself, but he loves and adores me, and I, him. I really couldn’t ask for more” with that Nakia left Kisi with her thoughts and a search for a food truck.

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Kisi checked her watch as she waited in line for the food truck for the second time today. After lunch, she had gotten off a long but unproductive phone call with the Jabari Chief himself. Apparently, the Jabari already have a sufficient prenatal program in place and there was no need to add to the program that already met all their needs and beliefs. He was not even willing to hear the pitch.

After that, Kisi was more than ready to go home, the day had drawn on after that. She completed mundane tasks for the rest of the day and because of that, she didn’t see herself entering her kitchen to start trying to prepare a meal she had very little knowledge on how to prepare. If only the man in front of her could speed up, Kisi would have been on her way home to her couch and comfy clothes.

“Yeah, imma get my usual and a number eight. Also, put whatever the lovely lady behind me is ordering on my tab too” she looked up, recognizing the American twang mixed in with broken Xhosa when he could. He turned and smiled at her. “Kisi right?”

“Yes my prince” she began to salute him before he stopped her

“You don’t have to do all that, let’s drop all the royalty shit for a minute. I’m just trying to know my future coworker.

“I think you mean your employee, and I will have a number eight as well,” she said to the chef

“If that’s what you wanna call it yeah”

“It is what I actually am, at least for now anyway,” she said with a mischievous smile

“You saying that could change because I really am just trying to get to know you” his dimple came through as he smirked “I’m trying to see the brains behind all that beauty” Kisi gave goofy smile, she had to admit, she appreciated the efforts.

“Perhaps things could change, but as for right now, I am going to keep getting meals for me I’m gonna end up sharing with my man, but if he stops acting right I will surely let you know” her voice dripped with sarcasm, but that didn’t stop Erik from appreciating her full essence.

“Thank you for dinner,” she said before walking away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kisi was ready to stand under the shower and let the hot water melt away all of the stressors Monday had brought her. She placed the takeout container in the microwave, ready for her once she left the shower. Walking back over to get her purse from the door, she noticed a pair of shoes that did not belong to her. She smiled softly, already feeling comforted by his presence.

She opened up her music selection on her beads and pressed shuffle, Whitney Houston’s ballad ‘Saving All My Love For You’ bolted through her home, she walked into her room throwing her work pants into the closet. She found her robe and followed the steam in the bathroom.

She stopped in front of the mirror and stared at her tired reflection. She may have bitten off more than she could chew, but somehow she couldn’t find it in her to stop.

The shower door opened, releasing more steam. Kisi watched as he wrapped a towel loosely on his waist. He looked at her solemn face, before wrapping his arms around her and letting his head rest in the crook of her neck.

“Hello” she greeted him softly

“Monday was a hard reality wasn’t it” she nodded slowly, she couldn’t even begin to tell him how hard.

“I got takeout, I already failed my own challenge,” She said with a pout

“To be honest love, there was very little that had me believing you would be able to turn into one of those ladies on the cooking channel,” he said with a chuckle, Kisi his arm playfully.

She turned in his arms to kiss him, she stared at his face for a while before speaking.

“I didn’t expect to see you so soon, where does Nakia think you are this time”

“Overnight drill with the military base near here.” she thought about it for a second before nodding

“Alright, but you have to go home tonight. You cannot spend that much time away from her if you just came back from a trip.” he buried himself in her neck again. He didn’t want to think about any of that. He wanted to keep pretending, even for a moment.

“And make sure you leave from the back door. Apparently, my mother is getting intel about my life from my nosy neighbours. Just the thought of your existence has wedding drums ringing in her head.” He leaned back and laughed, he lifted her and placed her on the sink. He could hear the song change to Sam Smith’s ‘Leave Your Lover’

“And is marriage something you see yourself in Kisi. Do you imagine yourself having that fairytale-like moment? What about the happily ever after that follows” his smile showed he was joking but his eyes held a seriousness to them.

She stared at his chest, not wanting him to see her mind fast at work. She wanted to say yes, that she saw herself performing their traditional rituals with one another. The thought of walking down the aisle towards him gave her butterflies.

But she knew none of that would ever be possible. Instead, she thought about Nakia’s words, it wasn’t slow with him, from the moment they met it had been fireworks. He was her soulmate, and though she had never said it out loud, she felt it so deep within her it hurt. That’s what love does, here Kisi was accepting the crazy circumstances of their relationship. She could only look forward to nights like this where he could sneak away. If she was lucky, a weekend getaway where they could scream their love to the heavens. It was all she could really ask of him, she literally could not ask for more.

So instead she answered his question with a lie, “I’m not sure right now” Kisi wrapped her hands around his neck and stroked the hair at the back of his neck.

“But let’s not think about any of that, or anything else really. Let’s forget all the questions and struggles of reality and just focus on right now, just for this moment.”

He didn’t have to say it, but she knew he was desperate for the escape as well. He kissed her softly and held her as close as he could because, for just this moment, he was allowed to let her feel how much he loved her.

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Taglist: @writingmarvellousimagines @ghostfacekill-monger @chaneajoyyy @shaekingshitup @fd-writes

#OC #sarcasticsunshine #sunshinewrites #one shot

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sarcastic-sunshines · 4 years

Text

Just For This Moment - Part 2

Author’s Note: I just wanted to start with a thank you for all the reviews and reactions of the first part. Your reactions are what motivates me to keep writing so thank you. This will be the final part, I hope it gives you all some type of closure.

Part 1

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The market was very busy, even for a Saturday, Kisi was already over the close surroundings of the market. But she was craving roasted peppers for dinner, and she wasn’t going to let anything stop her. She navigated the market space as carefully as she could, her body contorting as best as she could to fit the tight space.

She walked up to the stand that she was looking for, she smiled at the elderly woman who ran the stand before picking up a few bell peppers, holding them up and examining them. She noticed the elderly woman staring at her intensively. She picked a few more peppers before passing the bag she had picked to the woman before walking over and staring at some scotch bonnets. Kisi could not remember if she had some at home, she grabbed a bag and got some more just in case. Scotch bonnets had become her more consistent craving, despite her mother’s warning that she should be careful in how much she consumed. She passed her hand on her stomach without thinking about it.

“How far along are you?” the elderly woman asked her, Kisi turned her head to look at her, the elderly woman repeated her question while pointing at Kisi’s stomach.

“I just started my sixth month,” she said with a smile.

“I am sure you and your husband are very excited”

“We are, though he isn’t around as much as he would like to be”

“Is he a war dog?” the woman whispered

“Something like that, his job takes him abroad quite often. We never really planned to have kids, but we are making the most of it. Quite frankly, I am okay with it just being the two of us “ she held her stomach protectively.

The woman smiled before speaking, “ it will not be easy, but I pray Bast watches over your family as you embark on this new journey.” Suddenly a younger woman came up behind the woman in her stand, kissing her cheek and setting down some more vegetables.

“This is my granddaughter, she helps me from time to time. I raised her myself, my son is a war dog so he is rarely here. So I can relate to your situation dear. “ Kisi nodded, waving hello to the young girl, who was staring at Kisi very intensely.

“I know you, you used to do press conferences with the King” Kisi got nervous, she hadn’t realized she would be someone people could recognize from her brief television appearances.

She looked around hoping no one else heard what the girl said: “Yes, I worked with the health minister, so I did a few projects with the King.”

“ That is so cool, I always wondered what the royals are like”

“Well from what I remember, they were all very sweet and kind. The King especially, he made you feel like he was always at your level” Kisi caught herself reminiscing, thinking about how his touch felt, the warmth of his body over hers. “But that isn’t my life anymore, I haven’t worked there for about nine months.”

The girls nodded, seeming a little disappointed at the news. “Well, I still think it is amazing that you will be giving birth in the golden year.”

“What is the golden year?” the elderly woman asked

“It is what they are calling the year, the Wakandan heir was born.”

“That’s nice, especially since it took so long for King and Queen to conceive. May Bast bless them both.” Kisi nodded awkwardly before deciding it was time for her to leave the market.

She finally felt like she could breathe after leaving the busy market square. She was enjoying her stroll home when her kimoyo beads went off. She looked down and saw her mother was calling for what would be the fourth time today.

“Hello Mama”

“How are you doing darling? I have been trying to reach you all afternoon” she asked dramatically, Kisi rolled her eyes. Ever since she told her mother she was pregnant, she had only become more intrusive in her life. Although Kisi appreciated it during certain moments of her pregnancy, she still needed her space to sort out her life.

“I’m fine Mama, I just went to the market. It was very loud and busy there today”

“You should have told me you needed to go, I would have accompanied you, or better yet, send your younger brother to do it”

“Mama, I am fine, plus the doctor says it is healthy for me to move around, it's good for labour. Plus I am used to being alone.” Her mother got unusually quiet, Kisi knew what was coming.

“Kisi, darling, you know you don’t have to do this alone. Of course, I and the rest of the family will always be here, but if you just give us the name of this man, I am sure your father and I can talk some sense into him. You deserve better than this darling. Especially at a time like this, whoever this is, is supposed to be pampering you and going to the market for you. He needs to know what he is doing is wrong and hurtful”

Kisi was beginning to feel emotionally drained, she sat down at a nearby bus stop before speaking again.

“Mama, I don’t want to share the baby’s father, and as you said, I have you and Baba and all my siblings, I am not alone, and I am not worried. I really wish you would stop asking” her mother took another long pause.

“Okay darling, would you like me to come over, I can make peanut soup, I know you have been craving that recently” Kisi smiled at her mother’s kindness, despite her nosiness, Kisi would not be able to do any of this without her mother.

“No that’s okay, I will come over tomorrow and spend the night,” She said, finally getting back up and continuing her slow walk back to her home.

“Alright darling, I will talk to you later then”

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Her aching feet could barely take any more, Kisi was ready to just lay on her porch if it meant not standing anymore. Despite her best attempts to deny it, pregnancy had begun to take a toll on her body. The little walks to the marketplace were beginning to be too much for her. She finally got her keys from the bottom of her bag, when she noticed Madame Yemi staring at her pregnant form surprisingly. She waved hello to the neighbour she had tried her best to avoid. Kisi knew the judgemental types when she saw them, especially considering Madame Yemi had been sharing unsolicited details about her life with her mother.

Kisi finally got the door open and ran to the kitchen to place her groceries. She couldn’t find the strength to put them away, so she left the bag on the counter and collapsed on the couch, promising herself she only needed 30 minutes. From her peripheral view, she spotted a pair of sandals that were not hers but knew too well. She sat up slightly, listening to the other person in her home. She finally heard his footsteps coming towards her, Her heart was beating so quickly, she hadn’t seen him in two months, not that he hadn’t tried, but Kisi wasn’t sure if the relationship could really give her what she wanted.

“Hello love, how are you” he smiled softly, she didn’t respond, instead he sat down and placed her feet on his lap, he picked up one foot slowly kneading away on the pressure from the day. Kisi was struggling with keeping herself from moaning. Instead, she thought about how she never took her keys from him, a large part of her didn’t want to, she knew it was wrong, but she was happy to have him appear in her life whenever he could. Plus they never really broke up, things just got more complicated.

She pushed her thoughts to the side, as she stared at his face. “Don’ t you have diapers to change?” her tone was cold, he didn’t like it, and the instant frown on his face made it apparent.

He knew it had been hard for her, but none of this had been easy for him. Things had gotten even more complicated when Nakia finally became pregnant. He loved his son, and he wouldn’t change that for the world, but his birth had just brought unnecessary bickering between him and Nakia. It didn’t help that Kisi had finally chosen to end things, she didn’t feel comfortable continuing their relationship when a child was involved.

That didn’t stop his heart from guiding him to her doorstep every few weeks. So when Kisi said she was pregnant, he hadn’t been surprised, he was happy if anything. He was more shocked at how quickly she shut him out. But he didn’t blame her, it wasn’t fair to her or Nakia, and although Kisi had made the choice for them, he wasn’t sure he could continue to play pretend with Nakia any longer, and he knew Nakia knew as well.

“How have you been? And the baby?” Kisi swiped her feet from his lap and sat up straight

“We are good as we can be” her response was still so cold “You can’t keep showing up like this, you have to go back to your life”

“Kisi you are my life” she shook her head, trying to keep the tears at bay, though it was no use.

“No, I’m not, were not. How am I apart of your life when I would destroy the peace of the life you have already created? I am literally hiding in the shadows, I can’t even tell my mother about you. This is not how I thought my life would be” a small sob slipped from her lips. “ But that’s fine because I will adapt, but I can’t if you keep showing up here.”

He was ashamed at how complicated he had made everything. She had tried to leave many times, but his own selfishness wouldn’t allow it. How could he, when that meant saying goodbye to his soulmate?

“Kisi, I promise you I will sort this out, you are not a secret, and you do not have to be much longer. You do not have to do this alone” he took her hand in his, kissing before holding it to his cheek. Her sobs had slowed down.

She turned to look at him, it was so easy to get lost in his eyes, how many times she had promised herself it would be the last time she would get to see his brown orbs, only for her to find him in her bed once again. She had been excited with the thought of their child growing inside her. No matter the circumstances, she would know that their baby was made from love, and no one could take that from her.

“We have to make the right choices now, it’s not just us anymore love” she finally spoke slowly. He nodded, he took her chin in his hands and turned her head to face him.

“I will make things right, I promise you it will not always be like this” she let herself be fooled by his words once again. Whether true or not, she wanted to pretend that just for this moment, everything would actually be alright.

“Can I hold you?” he asked softly. Kisi knew she should say no, but between her hormones and the rush of emotions of his presence, she allowed herself to be nestled into his arms. She wanted to keep pretending none of their problems existed. It was just them and the little family they were growing.

She knew he wanted to believe that too, she felt it with how close he held her, as though if he let go, the charade would be over. So she played along with him, she took his hand and placed it over her stomach, where their daughter was kicking. Her little foot met the palm of his hand, she turned to look at him, and she was sure she had never seen him smile so big. She let the image of his smile erase all her worries because just for this moment, he was all hers. That is all she truly wanted, and she would pretend that was her reality for as long as he would play along with her.

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@writingmarvellousimagines @ghostfacekill-monger @shaekingshitup @chaneajoyyy @fd-writes @twistedcharismaaa @thadelightfulone @raysunshine78

#OC #sarcasticsunshine #sunshinewrites #part 2

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