#so no the world isn't as accepting as people are led to believe and that's what I mean when I talk about straight people

[gottagobackintime]

I've seen some people say: “Trent shouldn’t have been gay, he should have just supported Colin anyway.” And it's such a weird (and bad) take.

Had Trent been straight we wouldn’t have gotten the scenes we did. Colin could have opened up and told Trent how he felt, but Trent wouldn’t have understood, he could have been supportive. But he wouldn’t understand where Colin is coming from. But because Trent is also gay he knows what it’s like being in the closet, living with fear and dread. Living with thoughts like “if I tell the people I love about my sexuality, will they hate me?”. You can’t get that from a straight ally, no matter how supportive and well meaning they are. Because they don't know what it's like. We need straight allies, we need all the straight allies we can get. But what Colin needs RIGHT NOW is someone who, while not a professional athlete, is involved in the world of football. Knows about homophobic fans, knows that there are a culture of toxic masculinity and homophobia in the clubs. That is why it’s important that Trent himself is gay.

Colin almost got runover by a cyclist in his desperate attempt to run away from Trent at the gay bar. But the relief when he understands what Trent is saying "I must have a good reason for that, mustn't I?" is so clear. Trent is also queer, Trent is safe, I can let Trent in.

And I think some people might read that line as "I haven't outed you because I'm gay too, but if I had been straight I would have" which isn't what Trent means, Trent is using that phrase to be subtle, to let Colin come to his own conclusion, because Colin is stressed out, he's scared. By letting Colin think for himself it gives Colin an opportunity to calm down (which is also why Trent holds his hands out as if calming a frightened animal, he also makes himself slightly smaller by bending his knees and leaning forward slightly). And he does, he realises what Trent is saying and he calms down. It's also an added layer of security it's not just, "I haven't outed you" it's "I haven't outed you because I am also queer". A straight person saying that they haven't outed you doesn't hold as much weight as a queer person saying it. Because you know that the queer person knows how important it is to be safe and to come out on your own terms wheras a straight person, especially an eager well meaning ally might try and encourage you to come out because "hey, it's gonna be fine", even when that's not the support you need at the moment (there are ofc exceptions, both when it comes to straight people and queer people).

But because Trent is also gay, Colin now has someone in his corner at work, who knows him, knows his secret. Who also carried that secret himself once. We’ll most likely get straight allies in the other players and the leaders at Richmond.

So no, Trent shouldn’t have been straight. Because that is not the support Colin needed at that moment. He needed queer solidarity.

#ted lasso #ted lasso spoilers #colin hughes #trent crimm #I saw someone on reddit saying that this whole thing with colin being scared of coming out was a bad storyline in 2023 #because it's not a big deal #and I was baffled #thankfully some people called them out on that #because colin just wants to live his life #he says he doesn't want to be a spokesperson but that's what he'll become if he comes out whether he wants to or not #because he'll always be the first active gay premier league player #and it's also arrogant to say that it's accepted to be queer in 2023 so it's not a big deal #when queer and trans people are stripped of their rights and their right to express themselves in the US for example #and queer and trans people are killed all over the world simply because of their sexuality and/or gender identity #and even if you live in a fairly accepting country like I do for example #it's still the fear that YOUR OWN family and friends will reject you #because to quote monty python ''we're all individuals'' #it doesn't matter how accepting society at large is because society are made up of individuals who has their own beliefs #so no the world isn't as accepting as people are led to believe and that's what I mean when I talk about straight people #no matter how well-meaning they are they will have a hard time understanding #nicole watches stuff

[aoxizu]

i have another 2.1 character dynamic post in the recesses of my brain but i need to get this out first

star rail's 2.1 update main plotline leans a lot more into existentialism and absurdism than i thought it would which is a really nice surprise

like i thought before 2.0 that at most it was just going to be some "oh no capitalism bad ipc bad cults also bad" thing but honestly what we got is so much more interesting. the spoilers start now

also massive disclaimer i am not a philosophist and actually i really don't like philosophy because it makes my brain hurt and i would much rather just look at logical nice things like math and plants so. if i get anything wrong please correct me

acheron's past and how she became an emanator of nihility reminds me somewhat of the absurdist theme of how people always look for meaning when there isn't any, until they finally realize that the universe is meaningless

and the entire path of nihility basically is a road towards that realization that people tread on, and the difference between the real world and star rail is that in the real world here we have people who will see that and then go write a book about a guy not crying at his mother's funeral, whereas in star rail it seems that just accepting that the universe is meaningless turns you into a pathstrider or even emanator of the nihility (not sure if i remember the details, correct me if i'm wrong)

and then aventurine's whole motivation is trying to understand why the universe is so cruel to him, and to find meaning when you have everything except freedom, both of which are absurdist themes

the leap of faith argument often attributed to søren kierkegaard claims that even though there is no rational logic for believing in god, you should do it anyway because the alternatives are madness, suicide, and ignorance. this was one solution to the problem of confronting the universe's meaninglessness: choosing to believe in a higher being regardless

later world wars i and ii both contributed heavily to the rise of absurdism as people returned from the war, having seen so many others die around them, and then just going back to a normal society with none of what they as individual soldiers had contributed seemingly doing anything. and then it happened again, but on a much greater scale with even more deaths. both wars and the destruction they brought led many people to start questioning why a supposedly moral god could allow this suffering, and this is where camus comes in and says that actually religion and nationalism both aren't good solutions, and instead we should just accept meaninglessness and keep living despite the absurdity

and i think dr ratio's scroll thing kind of relates to that

he tells aventurine to open it when he's about to die, or when he's completely out of answers for the question of how to confront absurdity

and dr ratio's answer for aventurine is to just tell him to keep living, good luck

which is. yeah

it's the argument that there are more answers to nihilism than just 1) going insane, 2) pretending like it doesn't exist, and 3) dying

it's the bold claim that despite everything, you can still choose to live

sure nothing makes sense but that does not detract from your life. it doesn't need to make sense at all

and with the understanding that things do not need to fit our human definition of meaning, we can continue on knowing our true place in the universe

and with that aventurine walks into the very big black hole like look at that thing you cannot tell me there is no symbolism there

let's go back to acheron.

in the part where you get a snippet of acheron's conversation with some guy just before this cutscene, the other party states that "[IX] leave[s] woven strands of fate for humans to walk, and together THEY weave a great shadow...And this shadow silently envelops them."

which to me sounds like a statement on how people across time and space have again and again come to the same question, what is the meaning of life?

and acheron's whole color thing seems to mean that she is one of the few who, after walking so far on the path of nihility, somehow have not died yet, be it from madness or something else

like it seems implied that many many more have seen the meaninglessness of the universe and have not reacted as well as acheron has

ok i have more to say about the elation and how it in turn relates to the nihility but that will have to come later but there is. a lot of interesting things there to explore

once again disclaimer: I Am Not A Philosophist And Do Not Know What The Correct Definitions Of These Words I'm Throwing Around Are. thank you for coming to my ted talk that was more of a longwinded ramble

#hsr #honkai star rail #2.1 spoilers #hsr aventurine #dr ratio #(briefly but i think i might have more to say about him later once my brain gets working) #acheron #hsr analysis #i should make a tag for that because this is probably not the last time i'm going on a wild tangent about star rail #but bad #bad hsr analysis #someone save me and take me back to the luofu i don't want to be doing english homework while playing a supposedly relaxing upbeat game #or whatever it was that shaoji promised in the 2.0 livestream #i just want to go back and see dan heng and jing yuan and qingque and bailu and you get the point #get me out of this dreamscape.

[haeresysabound]

A certain cutscene has been circling about on Twitter again, specifically in regards to the fairytale Nahida tells detailing Scaramouche's past as Kabukimono and the events that led to him joining the Fatui, which (perhaps unsurprisingly) got me thinking.

The way Nahida portrays Dottore is simply fascinating.

First of all, she notes that when he takes off his fox furs to stare at his own reflection, he "laments" that he is a monster and the foxes around him are incapable of seeing it. A interesting choice of word, that. "Laments." Not gloats, or crows, or cackles with sadistic glee. He laments - expresses grief and sorrow - that they are incapable of seeing him for what he truly is. She continues with his dialogue in saying that he pities them, yes, so he doesn't exactly hold remorse for his deception, but she clearly portrays him as having a sort of sadness that he cannot be accepted for who he is.

This fits in perfectly well with what we know of Dottore from his interactions within the Archon Questline itself. He does hold bitterness over the Akademiya's inability to accept his genius. He holds a sense of betrayal over being chased out of his hometown with pitchforks for being nothing more than a perfect example of Sumerian intellect. He understands that other people see him as a monster, but Dottore genuinely does not see himself that way and it bothers him.

He tells us in his Archon Quest that he has no intention of being rejected by his homeland for a third time. Dottore does not hate his nation. Not entirely. Some part of him would very much like to be acknowledged by it. He does not strive for rejection; he genuinely seeks acceptance.

Which leads to the next interesting part of Nahida's fairytale: she claims that he finds "solace" in the arrival of Kabukimono; someone he considers to be an outsider like him. Dottore has already accepted that people do not consider him to be a human and that they will only ever see him as a monster, yet he isn't entirely happy about it. He still seeks kinship. He finds comfort in knowing that someone else is as much of a freak as he is - someone who looks human believably enough, but clearly isn't.

I'm in no way entirely saying that Dottore had any desire to befriend Kabukimono, nor that he only ever had positive intentions for him. What I am saying, however, is that Dottore clearly did feel better when he wasn't the only 'monster' among the humans. Someone who was equally as unlikely to be accepted; someone who could, perhaps, understand his world view. Kabukimono was an outcast of humanity as well. Wouldn't that be wonderful, to be outcasts together? To know that he wasn't entirely alone even in his monstrosity?

To find comfort in knowing that he wasn't the only person to exist utterly incapable of being accepted for who he is?

Except, as the fairytale goes on, Kabukimono is accepted. He isn't a fox - he is evidently different; Nahida points out his slim tail compared to the foxes' bushy tails and obviously presents him as a kitten in a clear comparison to humanity that Dottore isn't afforded - yet the foxes overlook those flaws. They overlook the things that make him different and accept him for what he is.

There's a difference here, of course. Dottore is still pretending to be a fox; Kabukimono never pretended to be anything else. It was always going to be easier for the humans in the actual timeline to accept Kabukimono because he wasn't hiding. But clearly, that didn't matter.

Again, I'm not saying that Dottore did everything that followed because of this event. He was at the furnace for a reason and it was highly unlikely to conclude in any other way. But there is something exceptionally personal about the way he ends up enacting the actual plan that definitely would not have happened had Kabukimono not been there.

Because Nahida's fairytale continues by explaining that Dottore is "furious at the happy resolution".

This is the part I find most fascinating. Dottore is furious that Kabukimono finds acceptance. Something that isn't even human is accepted when he, who has always been human, is incapable of being understood and seen and accepted the way he wants to be. But it's more than that. It's the realisation that he is being forced back into solitude. He doesn't have that kinship anymore. There is no longer someone who could possibly understand his worldview. All of the comfort Dottore previously found in Kabukimono's existence is torn away from him so quickly.

At this point, Dottore knows he won't be accepted by humanity. He's already been branded a monster. If he took off the disguise, he wouldn't be welcomed as Kabukimono was; he would be chased away yet again. So copying Kabukimono's approach isn't possible.

What is possible, however, is ensuring that Kabukimono will never accept or be accepted by humanity ever again... which makes it much easier to later recruit him into the Fatui - not as a singular experiment for Dottore's own purpose, but as a comrade. A very purposeful word choice Dottore himself uses when musing aloud to Pierro about his success at the furnace.

The way Nahida portrays Dottore in the fairytale suggests that there's a lot more to him and the things he does than the inherently logical and sadistic mad-doctor curiosity that he more openly expresses. We've already seen it before, in small form, and I've talked about that before as well, but the fairytale takes it to a level beyond what we know from the Archon Quests.

Dottore is human. He seeks acceptance, doesn't understand why he won't be accepted, and is evidently bothered by it. He enjoys not being the only 'monster' in the world. He dislikes it when that kinship is taken away from him, so he takes it back - almost in a reflection of his own acceptance into the Fatui.

And I just think it's neat to see the layers in his character presented this way from the Archon of Knowledge herself.

(Also, not entirely related to the fairytale itself, but I noticed this as I was watching both the fairytale cutscene and the Niwa-Escher cutscene for dialogue, so I wanted to include it as well:

Clearly, Dottore does have an interest in Kabukimono as an experiment. That's essentially his whole point. His conversation with Niwa shows as much; the moment he actually met Kabukimono, he was already planning a way to use the furnace as a step towards obtaining Kabukimono for the purposes of his experiment. But there is something interesting that he mentions - two things, actually - that show the truth within the fairytale portrayal of Dottore.

One is that he thinks it is inevitable for Kabukimono to lose his innocence as humans will always use - and fail to accept - one that is not 'our own kind'.

Two is that he ponders whether gaining Niwa's heart will turn Kabukimono human... before declaring that it's "quite impossible".

Even in reality, Dottore sees himself as human. He accepts that other people see him as a monster - even encourages Niwa to do so out of respect for the man to lighten the blow of falling into Dottore's carefully laid trap - but he does not see himself as anything other than human. At the same time, he doesn't believe that non-human beings are capable of becoming human. Just as the fairytale implies, Dottore doesn't believe that he will ever be accepted by people who don't already see him as human.

I just think it's interesting to think about.)

#dottore #haeresysrambles

[toji-girl]

there for you | k. ryuguji

synopsis: Life sometimes doesn't go the way you want, people make mistakes but this one wasn't a mistake, it was one of the best things that has ever happened to you, no matter the hurt it caused others.

wc: 2.8k

tags: 18+ ONLY content + explicit smut: minors and empty blogs DNI + not beta read + repost from my old blog + angst with the smut + cheating from reader + high sex [ducon] + weed + shotgunning + you're married to Mikey + fighting between you and him + slight sexting + fingering + squirting + unprotected sex + creampie + spitting + daddy kink + if Mikey is one of your favorites this might be your cup of tea [I do love him] 

an: this was my submission for the REDDIT-INSPIRED COLLABORATION hosted by @ohkento!

People would say that sleeping with your ex-brother-in-law and best friend's wife while he's out of town on business, would be an asshole move, right?

They just didn't know the circumstances of what led up to it. Only you and Draken do. A dark secret you both are taking to the grave.

You didn't mean to send the half-naked picture to him. Well, maybe not the first one, at least. He complimented you endlessly on how beautiful you looked, and how lucky he is to see such an art form. 

As of late, he's been giving you more attention than your own husband has, which isn't acceptable in any shape or form but you still ate it up greedily like a starved puppy.

And you'd be lying if you didn't think the tall, dark-haired man wasn't cute, and you knew him when you met Mikey at a young age.

Your mother forbade you to hang out with such 'trash' even after you and she got into endless arguments, and you ended up running away with him and Mikey pretty much, but it was thrilling to do so. Mikey wouldn't put you in any real danger though.

But he made sure you'd have your fun and also had his friends watch over you, especially Draken, who developed a serious crush on you before he started liking Emma but then after you and his friend got together it was all swept under the rug for a multitude of reasons. 

Now after being married to Manjiro for almost a decade the flame that once was strong and could burn down the world was a barely-there flame. The slightest breeze would put it out leaving nothing but smoke that would whoosh away as well.

And a part of you hated to admit that your mother was right when she said that Mikey would end up hurting you, and he did but it wasn't in the way she thought. His long business trips were weighing on you more than you really thought they would. 

He was gone more than he was at home, which made you feel like one of those cliche lonely housewives, but if it was true, then it isn't too far off. Mikey reverted back to his old ways months ago.

Between the fighting and everything else.

Draken got the front seat when he was around which was more times than not, a lot of the times he'd bring his son to see you and his uncle but his mini him stayed attached to your side thankfully this time it was just the three of you sitting in the living room talking. 

"You're going to be gone for an entire month? What - what about me Mikey? I can't even tell you the last time you hugged me or held me, your little missions are so much more important than me? Our marriage?" You asked in a pinched tone as you stared at him. 

Having an audience to the downfall of your marriage brought tears to your eyes as did the blank stare your husband gave you, his eyes blinking owlishly watching you cry for him. 

You stomped to the bedroom, sure to slam the door enough to rattle the walls, and if you had to guess a few of your husband's wounds popped back open bleeding into his soul.

The very same one, he said you fixed and mended, but you didn't believe it anymore. You worked hard on getting him back, doing everything you could.

When he gets back home from trips, you'd greet him at the door naked with dinner on the table only for him to tell you he was exhausted.

Not that you'd ever blame him, you know what you were getting into when you married him, but you didn't know it could hurt this bad.

And you always thought that your sex life wouldn't die out either, until it has. You can't even remember the last time you saw your husband's dick or his interest in you.

Many times, you pleaded for him to get help, talk to you, or anything of the sort but he flat out refused which left you alone and frustrated.

"Hey...he's gone. Can I come in?" Draken asked from the other side of the door as he rapt his knuckles on the heavy wood with a sigh.

You wiped at the tears flowing down your face while you sniffled and pressed the heel of your palm into your eyes. "I really don't care."

He pushed the door open and stepped inside with his hands in his pockets looking at you unsure what to say. "I'm not mad at you, your best friend is not the man I married."

Dark eyes softened as he crossed the threshold into uncertainty to sit down next to you. Draken is very familiar with the term 'a shoulder to cry on becomes a dick to ride on.'

"I know. He's - you know, Mikey. I've talked to him, and said it would end up like Emma and me did." He replied with a shrug. 

"Thankfully, we don't have a kid - oh, that was not nice of me. I'm sorry, Ken, I'm just a big ball of emotions. What did he say to that?" You questioned softly, curious on his answer of another failed marriage, his own sisters no less.

You both turned your heads at the same time and looked at each other. "Not much, I don't think anyone can help him anymore."

His sentence felt like a turtleneck sweater that was too tight as your throat formed a lump, making it hard to breathe or swallow.

Draken pulled his hands from his pockets and rubbed his large palms over his jeans. "Call me if you need anything." He told you before standing up giving you one more glance before leaving you alone.

Morning came with a heartache knowing Mikey was already gone, and you knew he didn't sleep in the bed last night. Everything came as it always did, doing the same things daily until it was time for bed.

Later the next night you lay in bed taking pictures in an attempt to feel good about yourself capturing a few good ones sending them to Mikey, unknowingly they went to Ken as well who saw it immediately.

It went unseen on your husband's phone, but not his friend who was staring at it feeling all his blood rush between his legs at work which was not a good place to pop one of those around all the guys.

Incoming message

Ken: Tryin' to get me in trouble?

You read his text feeling flustered thankful it wasn't a totally nude one, but he could use his imagination to see the rest of you bare for him, your flesh looked so biteable, his teeth ached to sink into you.

But you couldn't lie the attention was nice even though it was from Ken, the relationship was already complicated, to begin with, and this was pushing more boundaries but you sent another one anyway.

Outgoing message

You: No, but maybe I am now. Come by for dinner?

He ducked into his office and locked the door looking at the picture you sent him, your bra off and bare tits out for his greedy eyes to take in. Now his dick was extremely painfully hard and throbbing now.

Dark eyes scanned his screen reading your invitation with an arched brow knowing he needed to say no and delete the pictures, not reaching down with an open palm to rub against his bulge.

He pulled away and tapped his reply before sliding his phone into his pocket knowing he was going to end up fucking you later if you ask, it's been a long time since he's been with anyone.

He knows you're lonely, plus it's not right with how Mikey is treating you and his son isn't with him this week who you happen to be the aunt of, instead, he's with his ex until he picks him up on Monday.

You waited for his answer for a few minutes feeling dread fill your stomach as you slipped your wedding ring off and pulled your bra back on when he FaceTimed you. Hitting the answer button you looked at him on the screen. "Keep it off. I want you for dessert."

His voice was dark as he looked at you then the curves of your breasts. "I get off in an hour, see you then." With that, he hung up leaving you an estimated time to get ready for him.

In that time, you cleaned up, made dinner, and changed your pj pants into shorts keeping the tank top on without the bra when you let Ken inside. "Smells good, thanks for the invite." He murmured with a grin.

"Not a problem, also I rolled us a joint if you want to smoke that before we eat?" You suggested taking his coat from the harsh winter wind that blew outside pushing against the door with a groan.

He grinned and nodded letting you lead the way into the kitchen where everything was already set up. Being a gentleman Ken pulled your chair out and poured the wine then lit the end of the joint.

The conversation was pleasant, something you appreciated. Not once did he bring up Mikey or Emma, nor did you. The white smoke curled around you two while soft music played in the background. 

Long slender fingers stroked your shoulders playing with the strap of your tanktop. "You know the first picture was a mistake but then you replied almost immediately to it, at work might I add." Ken shrugged. 

"You look sexy what can I say?" He murmured moving his hand to the back of your neck giving it a squeeze as he leaned in pressing his lips against yours blowing smoke into your awaiting mouth with a kiss. 

Ken pulled away to puff on the joint before giving it to you to serve dinner where you both shared a plate feeding each other, the eye contact so intense your heart beat like a heavy dream in your chest. 

After more conversation about your day, he helped you clean up and sat back down on the couch with you draping his arm over your shoulder grabbing the remote to change the music, the beat more sensual and the lyrics turned sexual in nature making you flustered. 

You looked up at him with a lazy smile, your eyes red and glassy as your hand stroked up and down his arm. "Tell me you want this too, beg me to touch you." He murmured squishing your lips together. 

"I want you to touch me, Ken, please." You whispered and let him pull your tanktop straps down slowly until it was pooled around your waist baring your tits to his greedy large palms that cupped them. 

A sigh escaped your lips when he dragged his thumb over your pebbled nipples leaning in to taste your lips again, his tongue tangled with yours in a passionate kiss that left you breathless and wet. 

Ken pulled the rest of your clothes off just as slowly leaving behind a trail of wet open-mouthed kisses as his hand slid down between your legs his finger pressing into the wet slick spot with a squelch. 

You parted your legs wider for him letting him have more access to your bare pussy with a low growl. "So wet, all just from a little bit of kissing? How cute. She's weeping for me." He husked in your ear. 

No matter how bad you wanted to look at him you couldn't so you opted to close your eyes and let him pump two long slender fingers inside you, his thumb caressed your clit in a soft circle dripping spit down and pooling around where he was buried knuckle deep. 

He nipped at your bottom lip feeling his cock throb between his legs as you palmed at him tugging at the band of his sweatpants letting the heat rise between you two. "Want you so bad please, baby." 

Your hand slid into his boxers stroking his cock from base to tip slowly as he curled his fingers hooking them against your g-spot. "Look so good for me like this, wanna cum 'f me? Be a good girl and squirt for daddy." Ken demanded testing the waters for that kink. 

This time you looked at him as you let go of him to hump his fingers wildly as he sunk to his knees between your legs stroking your clit with his fingers pushing you over the edge until you squirted. 

Ever the gentleman he was, Ken lapped up the mess lewdly as he withdrew his fingers from you to tug his sweats and boxers down freeing his aching cock that bobbed from the sheer weight of it. 

You both looked at each other then down between your legs as he hooked his arms under your knees and pulled you closer to the edge of the couch rubbing the tip between your pussylips. "You sure still?" 

It's been months since you've done anything like this, borderline a year, and you didn't care about anything else but him fucking your pussy making it a puff cream like you deserved. "I am yes! Please!" 

The room filled with the musky scent of sex and desired pants as he thrust the tip inside your tight pussy with a strained grunt, his fingers squished the fat on your thighs keeping your legs spread obscenely wide for him to bare witness sinking into you with a guttural moan. 

You both let out unashamed moans, feeling how you mold around his cock. It felt even better while floating from the joint, Ken bottomed out, leaning down to kiss you deeply. 

His tongue met yours as he rolled his hips nice and slow, making sure you felt him as he scattered kisses all over your face. "You feel so good." He whispered against your neck softly. 

With your legs wrapped around him, he used his  strength to flip positions, putting you on top of him. "Go slow. You're getting greedy with it." 

Your eyes focused on his as you sat down, fully feeling the air get knocked from your lungs as you gripped his shoulders. "Because I want it." 

He huffed, blowing a chunk of dark hair from his face as you leaned in and sat up, letting the tip of his dick stay inside of you before sitting down again, repeating the motion while kissing him. 

It couldn't be helped. His soft lips felt nice against yours as he held your hips guiding you into riding his cock until you see fit. His teeth finally found your neck biting down at the soft flesh nipping it gently. 

Ken left soft love bites that would disappear in an hour all over your shoulder as he fucked into you from below. "You're so pretty riding me. I might keep you as mine." He huffed loudly letting his head fall back against the couch watching you fuck him. 

Your pussy clenched around him as you ground down now rubbing your clit against his pubic bone hearing the soft wet suctioning sounds of where you two met in an erotic dance that left you moaning from swollen mushroom head kissing your cervix. 

His hands squished your ass cheeks together, hitting a certain spot when he rocked up into you. "Good girl, want me to cum in you?" Ken asked as he leaned forward to kiss your breasts again, his mouth latched onto your nipple suckling hungrily as you nodded wildly.

With your fingers buried in his hair that came free from his braid, you tugged on it pushing him closer to you chanting his name like a prayer that poured from your open mouth like a river. "Draken!" 

Ken grunted as he gripped your asscheeks feeling your pussy ripple around him wet and so fucking tight he couldn't help it any longer and filled you to the brim with thick cum that seeped from your cunt. 

The both of you stayed like that coming down from your high as you buried your face in his neck, the reality of what happened finally hit you like a truck as your phone rang, Mikey's name popped on the screen as Ken looked at it then you with a heavy sigh. 

Sex clung heavily to you as you cupped Draken's cheeks pressing soft honey kisses along his face. "Thank you for making me feel appreciated and beautiful, I know this is beyond the scope of wrong but I really enjoyed our time together, don't leave me tonight please." 

Dark eyes widened at your request. It was something he wasn't expecting, he figured you just wanted his dick but it was clear how truly lonely you are and it made him mad as hell at Mikey for treating you this way and how lucky he is that he's the one there for you. 

#tw: infidelity #tw: dubcon #tw: weed #Ken smut #ken ryuguji smut #ken ryuuguji x reader #ken ryuuguji smut #ken ryuguji #Draken smut #Draken x reader smut #tokyo revengers smut #ken x you smut #draken x yn smut #tr smut #tr x reader smut #tokyo revengers x reader smut

[wutheringskies]

Jin Guangyao and Wei Wuxian aren't the same.

Jin Guangyao is one of the best written characters I've come across. A villian that doesnt look like one, doesnt act like one, is likeable, has strong motivations and a defined personality and extremely fun to read fanfics about. But what I dislike is the role that fanon gives him; specially his role in the story with allusions to Wei Wuxian, casting Jin Guangyao as someone similar to Wei Ying. The "poor children turned to forced villains" trope. This meta is about WHY that's NOT true.

The humiliation of his mother didn't give him the right to burn down an entire brothel. (personally, I found it satisfying but). The desire of acceptance from his father was a motivation for his crimes, not a factor that validates those crimes. Often, Jin Guangyao is treated as the counter part of Wei Wuxian. They both share only three similarities, however:

1. Both came from low backgrounds and struggled a lot in their childhoods. Meng Yao had food, but witnessed constant humiliation. Wei Ying had nothing, and then got tangled into the fucked up dynamics of the Jiangs.

2. Both were found to be much different than what people believed them to be. Wei Wuxian was supposed to be evil, hateful, a murderer who kills just to satisfy his blood thirst and need for power, a monster. Jin Guangyao was supposed to be the guy who worked hard and rose to the top, humble, kind, honest and pure of heart.

3. Both had their reputations destroyed from targeted rumor mill.

That is all.

Other than that, Jin Guangyao is NOT at all similar to Wei Wuxian by any measure. He had to do bad things because he desired power, and to gain, power in a corrupt world, you need to be even more corrupted. He killed all those who looked down upon him (not bodily harm him). He clenched his teeth and killed everyone who protested against him or questioned him. He silenced everybody before they could silence him. He isn't SOLELY responsible but he only played the cards that would bring HIM benefit, not the cards that were righteous, or good, or kind.

Wei Wuxian never desired power, was willing to give up a limb for the safety of his sect. When has he ever raised his sword or his flute if not in self defense? When has he ever attacked first and when has he ever killed an innocent? The only innocent he's most directly responsible for is Jin Zixuan and that was too, in an ambush, where he was asked to back down.

Not just that, everyone is always talking about the Nightless City massacre but never about the Burial Mounds Seige 2.0 where all of the cultivators WOULD have DIED, if not for Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian.

If your reasoning behind justifying Jin Guangyao's actions and murders is the "intention" then you come across as hypocritical if you condemn Wei Wuxian for the Nightless City massacre, ignoring everything that led to it. His prowess in cultivation, his natural genius, and his terrifying powers that he built himself even after losing a core are not crimes that he should be punished for, but he was. Because he's supposed to be just the son of a servant. How dare he be so powerful? So many attempts on his life were made and he survived them all. So many attempts to summon his soul, and they didn't work.

Is surviving a crime? For the Jiang Cheng stans who always thrust the survivor narrative onto JC, this is a question for them. Was Wei Wuxian wrong to have survived incidents in which he was being attacked? Should he have died for doing absolutely nothing wrong, other than having a different voice? For standing against a structure that always prioritizes one being above all, being the ultimate voice that cannot be questioned?

Here I'm going to quote some parts from the ExR translation of Villanous Friends:

He Su, “What was the irresistible trend? What was stirring up trouble? Jin GuangShan wanted to establish the position of chief cultivator only to imitate the QishanWen Sect in being the only ones at the top. Do you think all the world is ignorant? You frame me like this only because I spoke the truth!”

When you really succeed, all of the world of cultivation would see the true face of the LanlingJin Sect. Do you think killing me alone would put you eternally at ease? How wrong you are! We, the TingshanHe Sect, teem with talent. From now on, we’ll unite and never surrender to you Wen-dogs of another skin!”

Sounds familiar?

After a few laughs, he continued, “Sect Leader Jin, let me ask you something else. Do you think that, because the QishanWen Sect is gone, the LanlingJin Sect has all right to replace it?”

Wei WuXian added, “Everything has to be given to you? Everyone has to listen to you? Looking at how the LanlingJin Sect does things, I almost thought that it was the QishanWen Sect’s empire all over again.”

Wei WuXian, “Did I say something wrong? Forcing living people to be bait and beating them up whenever they refused to obey—is this any different from what the QishanWen Sect does?”

These were voices that questioned the greater powers. This is what happened to these voices:

Jin Guangyao: That’s not the way to go about things, is it? The TingshanHe Sect rebelled and schemed to assassinate Sect Leader Jin with all its forces before it was caught red-handed. How could that be called without a reason?”

Flashback to Wen Chao, asking if the disciples in the Xuanwu Cave were rebelling when they protected Mianmian who was asked to be the live bait of a monster.

Also, flashback to Wei Wuxian standing up for the Wens and being called a rebel when he stood up for the Wens who were being used as live baits to strengthen the Jin.

The ones over there cried, “Brother! He’s lying! We didn’t, we didn’t!”

Flashback to Wen Ning "losing control" at Koi Tower probably due to Xue Yang's invention. But the point to be taken away is that Sect Leader He Su's younger disciples, who are harmless, are framed as murderers. A position similar to what Wei Wuxian was put into.

He Su, “Utterly nonsense! Open your eyes and fucking look! There are nine-year-old children here! Old men who can’t even walk! How could they rebel against anything?! Why would they assassinate your dad out of nowhere?!”

Funny how the evils of society comprised of old grandmas, uncles, a toddler, a doctor, a fierce corpse, and a cultivator with no status, no core, no money, no voice living in a cave with a pool of blood, digging the Burial soil to grow some potatoes.

And not those who were sitting on their thrones, reveling in riches and ordering people around.

Jin GuangYao, “Because you made a mistake and committed murder, Young Master He Su, while they refused to accept Koi Tower’s conviction of you, of course.”

"A mistake" reminds me of the incident at qionggi path. Even if Jin Zixuan hadn't died that day, they would've kept cornering Wei Wuxian until he'd have no other choice but to go on the offensive (which is what he did.)

Turns out even being sooo powerful that he could shake mountains, he eventually died.

Yet, at such a place, nobody would listen to his protests. Sitting before him were two villains who already treated him as though he were dead. What they enjoyed was precisely his dying struggle. Smiling, Jin GuangYao leaned back, waving his hand, “Hush him up, hush him up.”

"You shut them in live?"

Xue Yang turned around, curling his lips, “Wei WuXian never used live humans, but I wanna try.”

So, Xue Yang is an actual demonic cultivator who's protected by the Jins, murdered 2 entire clans and this is the third one and godness knows how many more. Absolutely very few people give actual fucks about what cultivation methods to employ. The one who really cared was perhaps, Lan Wangji.

Jin Guangyao as you can see isn't being "forced" to kill people because he's of lower birth and nobody accepts him :(

He's killing people to silence those who speak against his and his father's (and they both are one and the same entity. he's acting on his father's orders which he could've disobeyed and run away but he would lose his sect reputation and standing.)

Why does his reputation and standing mean more than the lives of all these 70 people ?

Were they trying to kill him? No.

Did they attack him first to the point he would lose his life? No.

Would they have thrown him into a whore house? No.

Let us please not compare Wei Wuxian and Jin Guangyao.

MXTX wants us to know what's said and told may not be right. Wei Wuxian isn't fond of the techniques that are used to confirm Jin Guangyao's demise. He's critical of how nobody else is concerned. He's unsure of what NHS's motivations are - does he now want complete power? or did his plan only extend up to his revenge? He's critical of how only yesterday people were all over this guy and today they hate him. Critical of how society works on what is favourable and not what is true.

But he's not SUPPORTIVE of Jin Guangyao. He's sympathetic to people turning onto you, but not empathetic towards Jin Guangyao. He believes Jin Guangyao to be a cruel man.

Those are two different things.

Nobody knows better than Wei Wuxian how it feels to be set up at every step:

1. Firstly he was used as a punching bag for Madam Yu and an emotional one for JC throughout his childhood

2. The Wens completely played him up, setting him as the cause of LP's fall.

3. Then, he was played by the Jins and the cultivation world until his death by validating JC's jealousy against him, by villianizing him and estranging him, by setting up the ambush, by sending JZX, by making false promises, by not checking for validity, by controlling Wen Ning, by setting up the seige parade, by getting JYL there, and finally the seige. (even after his death disrespecting his all)

4. He was brought back to the world on the revenge plans of NHS and tossed like a tennis ball from the plans of NHS and JGY. Yi City arc? children would've died -> NHS. Burial Mound seige 2.0? everyone would've died -> JGY. if LWJ wasn't with him at every step of the way, Wei Ying would've once again been in such a spot. Without any status or authority he would've gotten no help, no aid, and been villianized once more. He would've been stabbed and captured with nobody to save him. He would've made himself the bait without anybody to fight the monsters off.

Each of us have individual capacities and also, each of us have the one thing we cannot let happen:

1. Wei Ying can't let injustice prevail and sit by the side doing nothing

2. Jin Guangyao can't take in being stripped of power and being a lowlife again.

Those are two very different things. JGY made every decision he could to escape his grand fear, which was personal. I don't condemn his motivations personally cause I find them hot. Similar to how I find his character hot. Yet, he's not the hero on the opposite spectrum. He's not the lowlife who was killed because people can't handle people from lower birth statuses being on the top chairs for making decisions - but that is also true - but is not the reason behind his tragedy. Not the sole reason and also not the most important reason.

The most important reason is as it is said: he believes himself to be different and values his life over others, similar to Xue Yang. Their personalities vary greatly, yet his "true" friends were Xue Yang and Su She. (He showed glimpses of the truth and of his reality to LXC. So, he's hiding the truth and LXC doesn't wish to dig deeper anyways thus not a true friendship.) One wished to take revenge in extremely unfair shares, a clan for a finger. A clan for a son. The entire cultivation world could die but he couldn't be badmouthed or put on trial or killed. The other - Su She, wished to be recognized by those who he equally hated, despised and considered arrogant and also was jealous and envious of. So, these two traits - great desire for revenge onto everyone who's ever said anything mean about him, and the desire for power. You may argue how this developed from his childhood trauma but you can't argue that this justifies his cold blooded crimes because it doesn't. Another thing I'd like to add is that, his friendship with Lan Xichen also shows his personality; not wanting to take the messy, big path (such as showing up to your own death planning party, or planning a death party) and his relatively calm nature. Yet just like the friendship it is fragmented and fake; a composure that is stuck onto the cold, and hot brimming desire for power.

There was one character who had to kill a large number of people or would have no other option left and it wasn't Jin Guangyao. There was one character who was hated by society solely because of his background and his desire to protect people and it wasn't Jin Guangyao. There was one character who had to give up everything for what he believed in and it wasn't Jin Guangyao. There was one character who ended up being the indirect reason for the passing of loved siblings due to the unjust society.

and it wasn't Jin Guangyao.

(but there were two characters who had confirmed sex before marriage. one of them was Jin Guangyao)

#mo dao zu shi #mdzs #mdzs meta #wei wuxian #jin guangyao #xue yang slaughtered 2 clans and was protected by the jins #xue yang #cultivation world bullshit #jin zixuan #wei ying #burial mounds #wen remnants #my meta #my thoughts #my essays

[tendergraphite]

What Led To Henry Winters Death

For many upon their first reading of The Secret History, they cannot accept the reality of Henry's passing; This I believe is due to Richard being unable to do so himself—He'd been attracted to Francis sure, wanted to marry Charles even, but he'd been utterly infatuated by Henry.

The book hints at this bitter reality threw it's discussion of ghosts, Francis saying in the epilogue that: ''There are such things as ghosts. People everywhere have always known that. And we believe in them every bit as much as Homer did. Only now, we call them by different names. Memory. The unconscious.''

We reject the second half of the statement, after all psychology is such a clinical word, reality simply is too monstrous. Isn't it so much more sultry and theatrical to believe Henry could've lived on whether in the shadow behind your footsteps, or in some far off land where it's simply a matter of sorting out a passport? Or folded in dreams, where all you must do is turn a page to find him in the seam.

''The dead appear to us in dreams said Julian, because that's the only way they can make us see them; what we see is only a projection, beamed from a great distance, light shining at us from a dead star ''

Richard compared himself to Julian in the aspect of neither of them being capable of seeing people for who they truly are, only their utmost qualities; This aspect I agree on—It's how we get so drawn in, causing us to be unable to pull away and see the full picture.

It's how we mistake Henry's qualities as otherworldly, his brittleness and condescension, the way he dresses and what he reads—We see it's beauty, but not it's second face: Henry carry's an umbrella during sunny days due to his debilitating injuries caused by abuse, and dresses in such a manner because his Father was likely his only exposure to fashion he could reference. Not to mention, it was only another example of how the old distanced him from others—And then even his personality?

He grew up with no friends, completely isolated with only tutors and his Mother for company—From what I can surmise, Henry wouldn't have actually known how to make friends; He had no idea how to interact with the real world nor it's social bounds. This is how Bunny's and Henry's odd dynamic developed. Bunny is friendly with all sorts and is highly socially aware, and would've noticed Henry's lack of friends quite quickly—Meaning, Bunny likely was Henrys first actual friend at Hampton, maybe even his first in years.

Bunny although flawed, was the only one who understood Henry on an important fundamental level, and saw him as an equal.

And then there is the matter of our cowardly cult leader Julian—Who I entirely believe is at fault for Henry's passing, as he'd been searching desperately for a Father figure whom would give him approval. The very first thing we learn about Henry even is that he easily would sway his own views to fit Julian's own, when Bunny had made jabs at Henry for buying a pen he had previously utterly dismissed.

Julian knew what would happen when he introduced Henry with the idea of a Bacchanal—Of escapism and ascending; However where as Julian always described it as a rebirth, Henry had described it as not being you anymore ''After all. the appeal to stop being yourself, even for a little while, is very great'' And the further he went on, the more it sounded like a suicide note.

When Julian whipped his hands clean of the group, as now they had become too unpredictable for him to feel the same godly control as he had before—Henry cried. The characters do not cry often, but when they do it's a pivotal moment in the book: In these moments, truly they've hit rock bottom.

Henry hadn't even cried once during his predicament. No, it was once Julian his only source of assurance and value had disappeared and completely abandoned him.

Henry's death ultimately had been spurred on by all sorts of sources; already underlining mental illness, the death of his best friend: And the final straw, Julian's abandonment.

Henry no longer saw a way out from his suffering threw Julian, so he had tried the last thing he could think of—Which was to die in a way he hopped Julian would see as noble, that would mean praise he wouldn't even be around to receive. I believe that's why he held onto life for so long when he was dying, he hoped for Julian to come and praise his actions.

....Fuck sake this stupid tumblr account was supposed to be a small ramble side blog, how the hell did I fucking get here.

#the secret history #henry winter #julian morrow #richard papen #tsh analysis

[moonlight-shadxw]

/ content warning : allusion to self harm, child abuse, alcohol || READ / LOOK WITH CAUTION ! /

[ Aizawa ]

To my parents ;

I believed, as a child

That the world was the

One I lived at home.

It was sad.

It was full of anger.

It was disappointment and unhappiness.

My actions never led to a better one. Your actions never led to a better one.

You didn't teach me how to live, you taught me how to survive.

You didn't teach me how to love, you taught me how to hate.

You didn't teach me how to fight, you taught me how to abuse.

You blame me for how I feel, how I react. But all I learned was from you.

My inability to feel for others, my inability to love myself, my inability to accept my weaknesses, my inability to fit in.

I was a stranger at home, so the world became my home, and I was still a stranger in it.

I thought the world was just the same ; chaotic, endless, cruel.

It's too noisy, people are mean to each other, and I hate everything.

I never learned to appreciate the little things. I learned to seek the same violence you ingrained in me.

I thought I deserved it.

I thought that was the world I lived in.

A world where love equals anger and punishment.

And so I learned to punish myself.

I thought it was a colorless world where emotion was weakness.

I replaced my tears with alcohol, and my feelings with a blade.

Father,

Mother,

Our home was broken from the start.

We were all drowning in our own blood.

We dragged each other down.

We couldn't love each other.

Father, I have your face.

Mother, I have your disappointment.

Father, I learned your anger.

Mother, I learned your hatred.

Who am I talking to,

Really. It's not like I

Was ever heard.

. . . Is it me or those

Bottles bleeding in blue⎯ ִ 𖤠

Blue. . Red. .

Does it matter?

It's all the same anyway.

My well being never mattered anyway.

Not to you.

Not to me either.

It's too late for me, isn't it, to be the son who'd make you proud.

It's too late.

Link for the video :

[ineffable-endearments]

The Crow Road and Good Omens: Further-Out Thoughts

Here are a few more thoughts; they're more interpretive yet than the ones in my original post about The Crow Road.

I see some similarities between Prentice and both Aziraphale and Crowley.

Prentice feels this need to believe there's something beyond this life, in large part because this life can be ended so quickly and so easily, and it isn't fair. Throughout the novel, he is never very interested in organized religion; his interest in spirituality is truly about the feeling that there has to be a deeper meaning to existence than this one life.

Likewise, I tend to interpret Aziraphale as willing to consider that the people who make up his institution are fallible, but still stuck on the idea that Heaven is performing an essential role: someone should be up there Doing Good, or, more accurately, encouraging people to Do Good. He has reservations about the existing spiritual establishment and how reflective of truth it is, but he still has this feeling that there has to be a greater power and a greater meaning that can be given to people, himself included, because otherwise, what would be the point?

Then again, there is a nonzero amount of Crowley in Prentice, too (and I know the point is that everyone has a little of each). Prentice is a college-aged young man trying to figure himself out in a world that can be profoundly unfair, and he wants to be allowed to experiment with the idea of life after death. Considering perspectives different from one's parents is part of growing up, after all. Kenneth is determined to steer his sons toward a specific worldview, and as much as Kenneth's perspective on spirituality is supported by the narrative, his stubbornness is also ultimately the thing that gets him killed. Prentice observes his mother's hands-off approach to ideology may have ultimately been more effective.

Doesn't this sound a little familiar? Prentice wants to be allowed to question, and he isn't willing to just shrug and accept unfairness without an argument. When he can't find satisfactory answers, he also tends to drown his anxiety and depression in alcohol and other substances.

All in all, I feel we may have seen the conflict between Crowley and Aziraphale playing out in Prentice's character development; they are the angel and demon on his shoulder, as usual. But the conflict was resolved in the way that I think and hope Crowley and Aziraphale's will be on a grander scale. Prentice ended up having to surrender his philosophy, especially the life-after-death stuff, but then his deep need for a sense of meaning was satisfied much better by finding that meaning here on Earth.

There's also an interesting interaction between the two stories in relation to the afterlife. Namely, The Crow Road takes place in a universe that presumably works just like ours, while we know for sure that in Good Omens, there is an afterlife of one kind or another. We can't be sure how it works, but we've seen human characters in both Season 1 and Season 2 maintain their consciousness after death. I wonder if maybe in the world of Good Omens, human mortality is somehow being exploited by the higher-ups?

Anyway, as a result of this difference, Good Omens also has a special opportunity with the "death doesn't give life meaning - life gives itself meaning!" message. Its main characters are immortal. The book already subverts the whole "oh, being immortal sucks, everyone eventually wants to die" trope by portraying Crowley and Aziraphale's motivation to maintain their Earthly lives instead of starting Armageddon. Season 2 added depth to that, and Season 3 has an opportunity to fully flesh out why exactly life on Earth is where meaning is created even when there is no time limit, even if people don't have the inevitability of death looming over their heads.

Another thought: something a little ironic in The Crow Road is that the incident that led to Kenneth's death "should," theoretically, have made Prentice believe in higher powers, if it was really about that. It certainly convinced Hamish. However, the whole conflict between himself and his father was more about the meaning Prentice sought, so instead, it pushed Prentice toward Kenneth's ideology.

I am wondering if this points toward an event that Aziraphale "should," theoretically, take to mean that Heaven is right or all-powerful or otherwise can't possibly be defied, but which will be the very thing that convinces him the entire system is wrong.

Finally, @loverdosis brought up the great point that memory and history are also major conceptual themes in The Crow Road. In The Crow Road, memory and history give the characters their sense of identity. Prentice also mentions it as one way people can achieve a kind of continuity that doesn't infringe on the importance of life itself. And all of that meshes with Good Omens. So far, Gabriel's plot has involved a very strong focus on memory issues, and through that, we've seen that there is something going on with Crowley's memory as well, although exactly what it is - how much of his memory is missing, who took it, whether he can or wants to get it back - is uncertain. Beelzebub described Gabriel's memories as "All your...you," implying that memories are the majority of what gives Gabriel his identity. The memory wipe punishment is very much a death sentence.

After consideration, I would not be surprised to see memory make a roaring comeback as a theme in Season 3. It could even bring themes of identity and purpose with it.

#good omens #the crow road #go3 speculation #s3 speculation #go 2 spoilers #good omens 2 spoilers #go s2 spoilers #good omens book club

[chocomd]

ATLA rewatch: The Storm

Holy crap the parallels between Aang and Zuko in this episode are really hitting deep!!

The episode starts out with beautiful weather and clear skies (not counting Aang's nightmare in the beginning), with no sign of a storm on the horizon. Just like how in the past, the events that would overturn Aang's and Zuko's lives would come suddenly and out of nowhere.

Then we get Aang fearful of the prospect of an impending storm and running away when the fisherman accuses him of abandoning the world, while Zuko wants to plow through and almost ends up dueling his own lieutenant over the issue of respect (until Iroh breaks them up).

When the flashbacks begin, Aang is playing with the other Air Nomad kids, and Zuko wants to join the meeting in the war room and Iroh lets him in. Both are in their usual, everyday settings and nothing seems out of place. Although there are hints that not everything is hunky dory, like Aang being the only master airbender among the kids and Zuko wanting to enter the war room without being explicitly permitted or expected to be there in the first place.

And then the events that lead to their emotional isolation. Aang being told that he's the Avatar, and being set apart by the monks as their savior and being left out from games by the other kids because he's now out of their league. Zuko watching in horror as a general proposes sacrificing an entire division to achieve a greater goal, and speaking out among the men leading the war with an objection that they do not share.

The consequences: The monks decide to send Aang away to make his isolation complete; the Fire Lord isolates Zuko even further by ordering him to fight an Agni Kai against (so Zuko believes) one of the very people in the group among whom he most wished to be accepted.

And what results afterwards is disastrous. Aang overhears the monks and runs away, only to be swallowed up by the storm and wake up one hundred years later in a world where his people no longer exist. Zuko discovers that he is to duel his own father, and submits to him in a sign of respect, which at this point Ozai deems to be the wrong response and burns his face and banishes Zuko until he finds the Avatar - a hopeless and impossible task.

Both Aang and Zuko have lost everything, and not only that - they place the blame on themselves, which gives rise to a deep sense of shame and also anger and intense emotional reactions whenever further loss is threatened (Aang with losing Katara and Appa; Zuko obsessed with regaining his honor through capturing the Avatar).

But when the literal storm worsens, both of them relive the events that led to their isolation in the first place. Aang goes out into the storm again, this time not to run away, but to save someone who needs him (the episode opens with a nightmare about his friends and his people saying "We need you, Aang," which is also repeated by Gyatso in a flashback). Zuko, who Lt. Jee accused of only caring about himself, climbs a ladder to rescue the helmsman from falling.

The storm slams Aang and his friends under the water, just like the time he ran away - but this time, he is able to save himself AND them. Zuko spots Aang flying over the ship, and he has the opportunity to go after him, but instead of risking the lives of his crew to achieve the greater goal of capturing the Avatar, he lets him go. And it's only after Aang and Zuko have redeemed or have vindicated their past actions in this way that they enter the eye of the storm, a place of calm that finally offers relief. And it's in this place where things are set right that Aang and Zuko exchange their first look that isn't one of hostility - they are seeing each other, really seeing each other for the first time.

#the storm gets its own post because it's so 🤌 #I wrote a meta I guess 😅 #and yes it's very zukaang #the storm #zukaang thoughts #zukaang #chocomd rewatches atla

[pastel-twilight]

✨ An Analysis of Shiki Misaki ✨

Neku, Beat, & Josh were all bitter towards the world because they felt like they couldn't be understood. Shiki stood out from them in that she outright wanted people to perceive her in a different way than she actually was.

It's interestingly ironic since she's the most accepting & empathetic out of the whole group. She's more than willing to encourage others to open up so she may understand them, & yet, she's very unwilling to show her "true self" out of fear that she's not good enough to be cared about in return. It shows how unworthy she feels in comparison to those around her. She even puts herself down at several points, subtly or not.

She was patient with Neku, gentle with Beat, & she'd likely be kind with Joshua. But she believes she's not like them. She shouldn't be herself. If she were, it'd expose just how unimpressive she truly is. Nobody would like her & her friendships would fall apart.

However, as good as her intuition is, she's very incorrect about that. Eri, who's apparently a large source of her self-hatred, adores Shiki. Claims to be nothing without her. Neku, a guy who hated humanity & pushed everyone away, warmed up to Shiki in a matter of days because of the cracks in her façade revealing someone he could have better respect for. He outright says he likes her as she is & to discard the notion that she has to be like Eri.

Shiki - insecure lil Shiki - caused a domino effect that led to the city she dreamed of basing her future in being preserved. It was Neku who proved Joshua wrong in the end, but it was Shiki's influence that inspired Neku to become better to begin with. She's simply that amazing.

Sadly, being able to change & befriend the previously uncaring Neku didn't fully clear her doubts. This led to the telling question, "Once you see the real me, will we still be friends?"

"Count on it. You'll always be Shiki," wasn't something she expected to hear in return.

I theorize that during the ending, she was only mostly shown & not completely because her arc wasn't finished. It symbolizes that her journey towards self-love has not yet reached its conclusion. We can't see Shiki at her (literal) fullest until she's ready to accept herself.

NEO is where that changes. She's living out her dream, being herself down to a fashion sense that might seem tacky to others, but feels cozy to her. It's what she feels about herself that matters, after all, & she's finally acknowledging it. This is why I like her new design.

Shiki used to base too many of her feelings on how others may or may not feel about her, but now that she knows she's good enough, she can be confident in whatever she does. Wear sneakers with a dress & oversized cardigan, then top it off with large, nerdy glasses? Sure, why not! She even succeeded in starting her fashion brand with flying colors. Now she can simultaneously make herself & others happy! Sad as it is that Eri didn't show up alongside Shiki, it goes to show that the seamstress can be iconic even if her bestie('s appearance) isn't involved.

Also, contrary to popular belief, Shiki's not shy. She was awkward when it came to herself & her needs, but was loudly eager to befriend & aid others. She was mostly super capable of putting her foot down when she felt disrespected. That strength can't be faked. It's no persona.

Shiki Misaki's bountiful optimism & compassion already helped her stand out. She never needed to be someone else to shine bright.

When we finally get to see her eyes, we note that they're big, beautiful, & brown like Eri's, but with a different hue. Shiki's hue. 💚

#i love this girl so much you don't understand #she's done so much for others and she's finally learning to love herself #i relate to her on such a deep level #does that make me conceited? adoring a character i feel so similar to? #i dunno but i don't care since i gotta love myself as well #twewy #the world ends with you #ntwewy #neo the world ends with you #shiki misaki #kiki's analyses #twewy spoilers #ntwewy spoilers

[horizon-verizon]

Rhaenys killing smallfolk is so…. Like wtf, and then people be like “Kinslaying is the worst crime there is! She’d be stupid to do it!”, first HOTD never introduces the notion of kinslaying, and killing hundreds of people is a crime too! She is already a criminal for what she did, why stop halfway if you’re going full murderer ? If you’re gonna commit a decapitation worthy offence, then you might as well kill the people who are a legitimate threat to your future great grandchildren and granddaughters themselves.

Them coming out saying that Rhaenys didn’t kill them because it’s not her war…. Lol, it was her war the moment she agreed to betroth her granddaughters to Rhaenyra’s sons. Her family (the little that is left of it) is in legitimate danger and she passed up the opportunity to kill people who WERE ACTIVELY PLANNING ON KILLING HER FAMILY ANYWAYS. (Yes, I know it was mostly Rhaenyra and Daemon but Jace and Luke and Joff would have to go too and Daemon is the father of Rhaena and Baela, the twins have legal claim to the throne, so no ways they letting that slide either).

Yeah, this has been my argument as well. I will never not be angry about this damned episode, esp this scene.

My biggest gripe about this fool of an episode is that if Rhaenys says she doesn't want to "be involved" in "their" war is that in ANY iteration of these events where Baela & Rhaena exist without turning this into a full-fledged AU like sweetestpopcorn's "The Black and the Greens", Rhaenys will ALWAYS be "involved"...

because those girls are DAEMON'S DAUGHTERS and ONE OF THEM LIVES WITH DAEMON AND RHAENYRA!!! And this Rhaenys constantly has said she primarily cares about her own kids and grandchildren, not Viserys, Daemon, or Rhaenyra...so what gives?!

In a world where these strategy-minded people would, you know, think strategy...Rhaenys practically spoon-fed them a public reason to go to war and assume a protective-justice persona!!!

To further paint the blacks as violence mongerers or even just shit-starters, even with those killed being peasants, bc the sheer number of people killed simultaneously who live around you & around your castle who have historically been a part of some Faith-led attacks against the crown (Aenys, Maegor, Rhaena & her brother Aegon--the Poor Fellows) is astronomical. Killing that many smallfolk doesn't pay and rather makes for a larger number of angrier smallfolk with a reason to be angrier than average. You'd think she'd realize that and idk, maybe not kill dozens if not thousands of smallfolk.

Otto will always look to them as possible rivals because of that connection to the person he thinks will likely always contend with him/anyone for power, espe after he includes the younger boys' hostage-taking in his terms in episode 10. Aside from Otto--who had a grip on Alicent's decision-making until it came to Rhaenyra (as if Rhaenyra doesn't come with her kids, who Alicent has accepted the risk of exile or total ruination for 10 years, but I digress).

And Alicent--by the next season's 2 trailers--appears to go back to Otto as a consultant and guide as to how the greens will face the blacks, so we can't argue that she will not escape his influence even with her allowing herself to understand his manipulativeness. She obviously didn't want a war and has tried to stave it off by holding Rhaenys hostage and sending that damned page to Rhaenyra with Otto's terms--that is if she actually sent it--she also sets up a possible war through usurping Rhaenyra in the first place! And Alicent isn't actually fighting against Rhaenyra for the sake of "the realm" but for for her own position as the mother to a possible king/wife of a past king and the lives of her kids.

Even in the book--if you are inclined to believe that she believes this and/or has sincerely taken Otto's fear of Daemon as her own maybe bc similarly to the show he instilled in her that fear of him--Alicent brings up Daemon's supposed bloodthirstiness and inevitable murder of her kids as reason to usurp Rhaenyra ("The Blacks and the Greens"):

As for the kinslaying part, they refused to insert Rhaenyra's lines of that, instead making her grab Otto's pendant and throwing it off the bridge in a much more flaccid version of what she does with Orwyle's chains in the book. Without the context of her giving Aegon that chance to withdraw AND criticizing Orwyle taking the green side and basically going against his own maester code of following traditions and laws, show!Rhaenyra's protests against Otto is more losing the desired cool & careful, wise reservedness that HotD already favors over original "proud" book!Rhaenyra. And I think that it's to give the Dance story this faux measure of "balance" that ozymalek talks about HERE:

People often argue whether HOTD showrunners are biased in favor of Team Black or Team Green. I think the answer to this question can't be encapsulated within the context of "bias", at least not fully. They are biased for both and neither at the same time and it's difficult to explain, but I will try to articulate how I see it. The Dance era in "Fire and Blood" is something that will fundamentally cause the feelings of cognitive dissonance. I think this is why people initially disliked this book when it first came out. It did not provide easy answers, it was written as a historical account, the in-universe historians were clearly biased. People, however, had trouble realizing who the historians are biased for and against. Team Green would have you think that "F&B" is biased against the Greens, because their allegiance as maesters clearly being to Hightowers notwithstanding, they could not evade simple historical facts: that most of the kingdom supported Rhaenyra, that Greens were horrendously misogynistic and that her usurpation was clearly wrong. That's why, approaching it from the "choose your favorite war criminal" point of view, it was difficult for Greens to accept that their preferred side is so cartoonishly evil - obviously bias must have been involved, even though the only pro-Black narrator of F&B is Mushroom, the rest are Greens. The maester's anti-Targaryen bias, however, manages to sneak in and mess with the reader's balance, causing said cognitive dissonance. It's hard to deal with it as a reader, let alone as a showrunner who's trying to adapt a story in which not everything is set in stone. They incorrectly assumed that, because they are constantly forced to question what is happening in the story, the bias is with the underlying idea that there was a correct side. As such, they assumed that all the inconsistencies result from maesters not choosing to view it that way. Ryan Condal repeatedly stated that he does not want watchers to pick sides, while George RR Martin embraces it and even encourages it (and I think that he himself has picked the Blacks). Such is our nature as human beings. So they decided that they have to balance the scales. Because Greens are poorly developed, they added more characterization for them that contradicts their book personas (abused child bride meow meow Alicent who is clueless about the plans that in the books she herself set in motion, for example) while simultaneously taking the characterization AWAY from team Black members. Rhaena and Baela barely have any lines, and though this may be the case of simple racism, it's pretty telling that they ignored the fact that Baela is tomboyish and has short hair. Rheanyra herself is so toned down that she does not resemble her book counterpart in the slightest, making her seem weak, stupid and undecided. Daemon straight up becomes a villain and a wife murderer rather than a throughoutly gray character (book!Rhea Royce unambiguously dies after a hawking accident while Daemon is still fighting in the Stepstones); that's because Team Black was in a desperate need for a corrupting influence in order to balance the scales. But some Greens aren't spared from this treatment either. Otto is made much worse than he was in the books, he straight up pimps out his teenage daughter so that he can elevate House Hightower. While Aegon is also a sex pest in the books, showing him openly rape a lowborn woman was a risky decision (as was the not very subtle implication that he rapes Helaena as well); not to mention that the child fighting pits come from Mushroom, whose entire gimmick is making shit up. So neither side is really spared from being villified and whitewashed, depending on whom we look. The showrunners were fully committed to making choosing sides a confusing process, making the cognitive dissonance of this story to be even stronger. This is why they aren't really biased for or against anyone.

#asoiaf asks to me #hotd characterization #rhaenys targaryen #rhaenys targaryen (aemon's daughter) #rhaenys targaryen's characterization (meleys' rider) #hotd episode 9 #hotd inconsistencies #alicent's characterization #alicent hightower #the greens #hotd #hotd critical #hotd writing #hotd comment

[holyshonks]

Why I love Rojka 'Kasaan (and you should, too)

If Master Chief blew up a Covenant homeworld, you might look at him differently. You might consider civilian casualties and the cruel calculus of war and wince. His story helpfully side-steps this issue by making it so that it simply never happens. Humanity never found Covenant homeworlds during the war soon enough to target them. Until Glyke.

If we expect cooperation and remorse from ex-Covenant who destroyed human worlds, what do we expect from a Sangheili fleetmaster whose own world was destroyed by Spartans? That's Rojka's story.

Rojka was once a fleetmaster, but was demoted after the Changing of the Guard, sent to a shipyard to repair ships rather than command them. As a result, he was not present for the attack on Reach or the assault on Earth.

When Reach fell, Spartan-II Gray Team was granted permission to target and destroy Covenant homeworlds in what was clearly an act of retaliation. They were cleared to destroy the Sangheili colony Glyke before comms were lost with ONI. Unbeknownst to them, the human-Sangheili ceasefire was initiated just before they decided on destroying the planet, effectively betraying the fresh alliance between humans and Sangheili. Rojka, a Glyke native, lost most of his family.

During the Great Schism, Rojka sided with Thel 'Vadam and the Covenant separatists, taking control of the fleet that he'd been tasked with repairing. Rojka was realistic. Like so many, he faced a crisis of character when he lost his religion. He worried for his species' future and longed for direction. He understood that the Sangheili needed to be allies with the humans to survive. To this end, he learned to tolerate them. But not the Spartans that ruined his life.

Rojka isn't anyone special. He's no Thel 'Vadam, with wealth, influence, and his family behind him. He's no Usze 'Taham, with old-world faith and an impressive pedigree. He could probably be most closely compared to Olabisi Varo'dai, except that she lost her home at the hands of a Covenant accident and not a UNSC attack.

Rojka is a refugee. Anyone in his life who didn't happen to be off-world when the nukes detonated was dead. The fleet he used to have was down to a skeleton crew. But Thel 'Vadam still asked him to lead the refugees to a new world that they called Rakoi. They started to rebuild, with Rojka becoming the kaidon of Rak, the Sangheili capital (nerd sidebar for those who care: I believe he was more accurately the high kaidon). He grows to love his new home, with one complicating factor: unbeknownst to them, Rakoi was originally called Carrow, a human colony that evacuated during the war. When the dust settled, the humans returned to find their new neighbors.

There's irony somewhere in Thel asking Rojka to do something he would never ask of a human: to set aside his anger at losing his homeworld and work peacefully with the people who took it from him. It's something that Thel hopes for, but when humans continue to hate him, he doesn't blame them. But he expects more from Rojka, and Rojka, who is concerned about maintaining support from Sanghelios, is caught in the politics. He agrees to maintain peace with the humans, which leads to a civil conflict led by his own cousin, who disagrees with making peace.

As part of this agreement, he is introduced to the UNSC Diplomatic Corp envoy Melody Azikiwe. At first, he resents her presence, thinking of her as a meddler and someone whose skills were ultimately useless. He considers humans to be a necessary evil rather than allies. He does not believe diplomacy is truly possible, and thinks Melody weak for talking instead of fighting. But when a two-front war breaks out on Carrow and Melody awakens Gray Team to assist, his resolve is shaken. Over and over again, he's reminded of how much both humans and Sangheili have suffered.

Eventually the civil conflict escalates to a point where the entire planet is in danger, and he has no choice but to accept help from the Spartans. The decision to destroy Glyke without clear orders was a contentious one for the team, which broke them once they realized what they'd done. In their own way, they try to make amends with Rojka.

In the end, it's not ships or soldiers who overcome the conflict, but people. Regular people, talking their way out and through problems. Rojka begins to realize the importance of jobs like Melody's and that there are better ways to solve problems than separating heads from necks (although he does do that, too). Having decided to set aside his anger with Gray Team, he returns home to Rak to rebuild. When he gets there, he learns that another kaidon has risen to power in his absence, usurping his title. In what is, in my opinion, his greatest moment of growth, Rojka accepts the new power structure without argument.

I can't overstate how unusual this is. Few things are more important than power and pride in Sangheili culture. Many Sangheili prefer to die than admit to being injured. They prefer to be killed rather than captured. The most honorable way to replace a kaidon is a battle to the death. But Rojka is tired. He wants to go home. He agrees to be an envoy for Rak, having grown to appreciate the power of diplomacy.

Growth!!!!!! That's growth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#its real rojka 'kasaan propaganda hours #give me a world-weary sangheili and i'll be writing paragraphs #it took me a while to decide how to structure this but when i searched my heart of hearts i knew one thing to be true: #i love him your honor #also adding entire pages of envoy for propaganda purposes. read it. #you want to read it #you want to embrace the possibilities of the joint occupation zone #rojka 'kassan #sangheili

[xinamie]

— kung lao thoughts !

just saw someone on another platform say that kung lao is not complex and lemme just. ok hold on. he's more than a cocky, food loving man.

i'm gonna focus on mk1 for now, but hear me outtttt !!! mk1 story spoilers ahead, you've been warned!

kung lao, a humble farmer, who is the descendant of the Great kung lao (lord liu kang's champion in the past iirc and like they were CLOSE bcs remember the scene with the jade statue? anyway off topic).

of course with family honor like that, lao would have this confidence, this arrogance, this ego that everyone groans about. he has this reputation to uphold - this legacy. he wants to be as great as his ancestor!

in the beginning, you find out that he isn't satisfied with the farm life like raiden is. he's the first to jump and react when liu kang tells them all about earthrealm after the test with the lin kuei. he craves adventure, glory, and a sense of just ... achievement.

he loses the title of champion to raiden, but sucks it up and congratulates him. he supports him along the way - bragging about raiden to general shao and cheering for raiden through the outworld matches. even if he was upset that he wasn't the chosen one (re: liu kang hitting him with that one line 'if you trained harder, you would have been champion' LIKE OW DAMN ok) - he still honors raiden and accepts the outcome.

let's talk about his story ending, kung lao messed up with shujinko! shujinko went haywire and it was because he didn't learn humility because kung lao couldn't teach it to him!! lao had always been so confident that he didn't put that into lessons for his student which led to liu kang and raiden stepping in. in this moment, i like to believe that lao learns how important humility is. not through himself directly, but seeing what had happened to shujinko.

omg what about the funny little lines about acting? how johnny offered them movie roles in the end and when raiden politely declined, lao whined. maybe he's intrigued about being able to work on a movie, to get out there and experience the world than just that farm life he knew.

kung lao didn't get to be champion, but he was able to go on missions in outworld and i like to think that he thrived. he got a taste of that adventure, that journey, you know?

kung lao is playful - those lines about wanting to spook raiden's sister with syzoth or how he whined to kuai liang(? i think or tomas?) about how he wanted to test raiden's sister too. how he flashed johnny with the flashlight LMAO. how he gets scolded by madam bo for making excuses sometimes.

LASTLY and also something i think people forget here and there, kung lao is ALSO respectful to some degrees omg. remember when johnny pulled that ripley line and kung lao was like bro??? that plus how he stood up for raiden as mentioned before, he literally becomes a shaolin master ... he may not be a saint, but i don't think he'd be treating people horribly or the type to be flirty every single time.

all in all, there are many sides to kung lao and i think there's a lot to be explored here. i'm down for the silly fandom lao moments, but also serious lao, conflicted lao, focused lao, etc etc. he's a champion to me.

#mk1 headcanons #mk1 kung lao headcanons #mk1 kung lao #mortal kombat 1 headcanons #mortal kombat 1 kung lao #im probably forgetting a lot tbh bcs i typed this up when i havent slept #but gosh kung lao is so complex #maybe not as complex as others but he still has layers #i admire him so very much #srry for the messy format besties

[autisticlifelessons]

Tips for helping your autistic child thrive at home

So, I'm not a parent myself, but I did grow up in a household where both myself and my sibling (both AFAB) had undiagnosed autism, and we're pretty sure our father is autistic, too. I've also got some teaching experience where I supported neurodivergent children and their families. Based on this experience and my own research, here are some tips you can use at home to help your autistic child thrive. These are biased towards my particular experience and may not apply to your own child, but they should give you an idea of the sorts of things you can do.

Give lots of emotional reassurance - the world is seriously overwhelming for an autistic child. Children's brains are still developing, and the younger they are or the greater their needs are the more help they will need with co-regulation of their emotions. Bear in mind that, especially for AFAB children, they may mask heavily at school and present absolutely no behavoural problems only to come home and explode. This is because home is their safe place where they can show more authentically how they are really feeling.

Be led by your child's needs and interests, and be prepared for these to change over time - many autistic people develop intense interests in specific things, which are known as 'special interests'. The stereotypical special interests most people have heard of are things like trains, but be aware that some girls who are really, REALLY into ponies are actually expressing neurodivergent traits. Showing your support for exploring these interests is hugely beneficial (and makes present buying a breeze lol). Of course, autism is a spectrum and presents differently in different autistic people. Many like the structure of a routine, for example, but don't force a visual timetable on your child if this is clearly something that isn't helping them. As your child gets older, their interests and needs will change with them, so be prepared to adapt and keep the lines of communication open.

Be prepared to give your child extra support navigating friendships and social situations - for many autistic people, social situations are highly stressful for lots of different reasons, and for children who are still learning how to navigate in the world this is doubly true. Encourage your child to develop friendships with others who respect them, but accept that they may not always communicate in ways that are socially expected (eg they may prefer parallel play). Autistic children can sometimes be more vulnerable to bullying or being taken advantage of, so ensure your child knows how to communicate boundaries and what to do if another child (or adult) is causing problems. In more general social situations such as going to the doctor or on holiday, your child may be more anxious and unsure of what is expected of them. Practicing these situations before hand through 'make believe' play is a great way of giving them a chance to develop the appropriate social scripts and feel more at ease.

Be aware that co-morbid conditions are often present alongside autism - it is very common that autistic children will have at least one other physical or mental co-morbid condition (basically means it occurs alongside). My sibling, for example, also has ADHD, PTSD, BPD, anorexia, dyscalculia, anxiety, depression, IBS, anaemia, eczema and insomnia (and yes I DID get permission to share that, it's all in their insta bio anyway). Be on the lookout for other symptoms not necessarily covered by autism and advocate for your child to get the support they need. Another thing to bear in mind is that autism often runs in families - if you or your child's other biological parent recognise traits either in yourselves or in family members, there's probably a reason why.

I really hope my tips were useful to you. As I mentioned already, your child may have very different support needs from me. You know them best.

Follow me for more tips - both for autistic adults and teenagers and parents of autistic children.

#autism #autistic tips #actually autistic #autistic #autistic child #parenting #children #neurodivergent #neurodiversity #neurodiverse #special education #autistic parenting #education #families #audhd

[blitz0hno]

are Mikoto and John both new splits??

sorry if someone has had this theory before but anyway I feel like Mikoto may have had some level of awareness of his DID before his crime. Like not much, but just enough to know he can dissociate enough to "forget."

If Midokoto (green Mikoto) is real he's part of the very first one we see in MeMe, particularly the "boku WA boku wo"/"I will save Me" line. Not that he "split" on purpose, absolutely not. But if he already knew he tended to forget things, and put his mind to forgetting his first victim, then John and Mikoto both likely came of that. What remains of him, if he existed, is likely dormant, feeling nothing but the weight of the murders.

Splitting typically happens over time, and isn't a one-and-done thing; it's likely that Host Mikoto is there because he himself was fronting before the amnesia walls went up. This is where things get confusing as we don't know how exactly the splitting process is interpreted by Milgram. We're a system and can barely make heads or tails of it. It doesn't make sense that Mikoto would be the only one before John if John formed in adulthood. It would however make sense that Mikoto is the only alter John *knows,* which is why I'm led to believe that at least one more lays dormant.

I believe the Mikoto we know now is what became of the old host, who split into someone "normal" like he was before the crime, an alter who accepted the "necessity" of violence despite not understanding the crime himself (if John's pitiful but valiant attempts at defending Mikoto in the VD are to be believed), and what's left holds the memory of what really happened, and is now dormant. It's even possible that he or John is a gatekeeper of some sort, meaning it's their job to keep world-shattering memories from the host. Since Mikoto himself is now walled off, but he's the one in Milgram, it's reasonable to assume that John split from him; but since neither can seem to remember what really happened, and memories can't just disappear and are held by other parts in a system, there's got to be someone who has the final piece. And sure, that someone could be Mikoto. He would at least know a motive if he were to kill someone, and whether he admits it out loud or not he himself may think about it, considering it's his job to be Socially Acceptable.

Mikoto CAN be a two-alter system, but I'm not a fan of how Milgram implied that John split in adulthood without really addressing the "lifelong" aspect. While it could be a trick to see who does their research and catches the inconsistencies, there are already far too many misconceptions about DID accepted as fact by the general public. That said, we know what the characters know and from that angle I think it's really cool how it's all so murky and ambiguous, because that's how it feels for systems figuring themselves out in real life. Traumatized people, after all, are more likely to be put into a position of "commiting crime" because they are victims themselves, not because they feel like that behavior is acceptable but because the situations they end up in tend to mimic what they've been exposed to since day one. Obviously this does not count for willful violent crime but for crimes of self-defense, impulsivity or other emotional dysregulation, horrible horrible miscommunication etc.. Milgram seems to understand that much at least so don't take this or any other theory too seriously. I feel like our boys are in good hands because first and foremost the narrative treats both of them like people. This is just one idea of how Mikoto's system could work.

There's also this thing which could mean nothing but I interpreted it as possibly a diagram for how his system works, the circles being literally more rounded parts and the distorted ones being underdeveloped. There is NO textual evidence for this just a cool circle. It would be funny if 009 has 9 parts in total but again nothing else to back this up so far.

#milgram #mikoto milgram #john milgram #milgram project #milgram theory #mikoto kayano #trikoto theory #more like trikoto³ lmao #If Amane is truly meant to represent a Complex system and Mikoto a “typical” system I'll be floored #never imagined that kind of contrast being shown in a big piece of media any time soon #even getting to talk about it at all brings me joy system structures are our curse special interest #maybe cuz ours is wack lol

[kaelyx-zac01]

I've seen a lot of Aziraphale hate after the S2 finale -- furious that he chose Heaven over Crowley -- which is TERRIBLY ANNOYING because a lot of people seem to miss the events that led up to the tragic finalé.

Because, let's get one thing straight: Aziraphale was only excited to go to Heaven upon knowing he could be with Crowley there.

Aziraphale literally outright rejects the Megatron's request almost immediately. He didn't want to go to heaven. He loved Earth. He has come to enjoy the delights that our world offers. "Where will I get my coffee?" perfectly exemplified that Aziraphale has grown attached to our world and the life, the home he and Crowley had built for themselves. It is only when the Metatron brought up the idea that Crowley and him could be angels together that Aziraphale accepts the offer.

And let's not forget that, the scene before that, Aziraphale was THREATENED to be erased from the Book of Life by Michael. Metatron came in like a saving grace and presented him with an opportunity to escape that threat, to possibly change things, AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, have Crowley with him safely as well.

Did people not see how DESPERATE Aziraphale was to make Crowley come with him? He literally breaks down as he says "I need you." Because HE DOES NEED CROWLEY. He literally reconsiders his decision after Crowley's rejection. Crowley wouldn't be with him anymore. And, he is the one he wants to bring with him to Heaven, more than any book or object in his life. Their home isn't the earthly life they built --- it's each other. And in Aziraphale's eyes, Heaven will only be home if Crowley's with him.

Lastly, Aziraphale is literally an angel at heart. He still likes to do good deeds despite not having to. He likes telling about these deeds to other people, particularly Crowley after they retired from their respective divisions. More importantly, Aziraphale is a believer in the fundamental good in all people and beings. Which is not naivety. I think after the Apocalypse incident, Aziraphale isn't limited anymore by duty to see things as black and white anymore. But, of course, he still believes in doing good. And I think most importantly, he still believes that Heaven should represent what it ought to.

That's where his similarities end with Crowley. While Crowley is too disillusioned with the system to think of the possibility of change, Aziraphale isn't. And as someone who also saw the errors in the system, Aziraphale was hoping Crowley would be happy to help him change that. This time, he wouldn't live in fear of falling as a demon again. This time, Crowley's suggestions wouldn't be a cause for worry. Aziraphale will always welcome them as his second-in-command. And most importantly, the threat of the Book of Life will be kept far from both of them. Which goes to show that Aziraphale wasn't wrong to choose Heaven. And sorry, but I don't think he deserves to do an apology dance either.

Honestly, I get why people don't see Aziraphale's side that much. The first time I watched S2E6, I was slightly hoping Aziraphale would change his mind and miraculously appear in Crowley's car. Nevertheless, hating on Aziraphale just shows how much of the ending's nuance flew over these people's head. Did the ending hurt? Like hell, of course. But, would I want it to end in any other way? Fuck no. Let these two idiots pine for one another. Let longing break their masks and allow their characters and their relationship to mature and develop. I'm sure that whatever Neil has for us in S3 will make all the angst ever so worth it

#pls fuck off if u hate azi after S2 #crowley was the naive one #THEY CAN'T JUST GO OFF TOGETHER THEY'RE IN SOME DEEP SHIT #i love these two idiots but pls get therapy #good omens s2 #good omens #ineffable husbands #neil gaiman #aziracrow #david tennant #michael sheen #good omens spoilers #ineffable idiots