#suddenly i care again

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

so in an attempt to actually use positive thinking, anytime i fuck up and my brain reacts as if ive cause a minor apocalyptic event, i compare my fuck up to the 4 minute fuck up committed by the crew of the uss william d porter.

and only today, as i was having to explain what happened to my mom when i was explaining the whole comparison thing, did i realise that most people dont know about it and ive decided that needs to change because its objectively hilarious.

...which is a weird thing to say about an event that occured on a warship in 1943, specifically november 14th.

see the uss william d porter was a fletcher-class destroyer but you dont need to know what that means, just that she had guns that went bang bang and that she was escorting another ship, the uss iowa, to cairo.

while they were on their way there, they performed some gun trials like testing the anti-aircraft guns or the torpedos. and while they were running a torpedo drill, the crew of the porter managed to fire a live torpedo straight at the iowa which you know, in terms of a list of things to do while escorting a ship, shooting a torpedo at them is not on that list.

especially if the president of the united states is on board.

yeah so fdr was on board and the gun trials were actually his idea, and part of the trials was that they were conducted under radio silence.

and that means the crew of the porter couldnt just call the iowa to be like "move out the way, we accidentally shot a torpedo at you."

but they did have signal lamps and you know, the signalman on board was trained to signal this exact kind of message.

...and uh never mind, the signalman did manage to successfully tell the iowa that a torpedo was coming toward them but wasnt as successful when it came to the direction the torpedo was coming from.

not all hope is lost though because the signalman could still use the signal lamp to correct his previous mistake and-, never mind, he announced that the porter was reversing, which she wasnt.

yeah so at catastrophic mistake number 3, they broke radio silence to warn the iowa and she managed to turn out of the way just in time which meant no one got hurt. and even though the inquiry into the incident led to chief torpedoman (fantastic job title btw) lawton dawson being sentences to hard labour, fdr intervened and waved away his sentence, saying it was all an accident.

but yeah, so thats my new measure for "how much did i really fuck up?" and when i compared accidentally picking up a pencil case without a tag on it in wilko, turns out it was a very minor fuck-up. yes, the cashier had to ask another worker to grab a duplicate so they could scan the barcode, but i didnt nearly kill the president during wartime via accidental friendly fire

#kai rambles #so like #i enjoy ships and learning about them and looking at them but like #i dont really care for warships #i dont hate them viscerally like i do cruise ships but i never really care for them #apart from the ones that were just like either ridiculously designed like the hms captain or the vasa or the novgorod #or the ones where just insane shit happened like with the william d porter #like this isnt even the extent of the porters unfortunate incidents like shr was sank by a kamikaze attack that MISSED #but somehow ended up below the ship and exploded and just like yeeted the porter out of the water #william d porter #uss william d porter #ww2 #world war 2 #world war ii #warships #again warships are really not my thing but god some of them are so fucking funny #uss iowa #fdr #franklin d. roosevelt #this suddenly got so many notes in like less than 24 hours what the fuck #shipposting

[knox-knocks]

Maybe exy is a little boring to him — but andrew doesn’t just not care about exy, neil notes in the beginning of tfc that he seems to outright resent it. boredom doesn’t bring about resentment. but do you know what does? the idea that a sport you barely give a shit about is the only reason anyone gives a shit about you

#this is so messy but I’m having so many andrew thoughts #like imagine your entire life no one seems to really care for you all that much #and then they find out you’re like. really fucking good at a sport and suddenly you’re wanted #but they don’t want YOU — that much is clear #they’d throw your ass out the moment you refuse to pick up a raquet ever again #they don’t care about YOU — they care about how many goals you can block #shit I’d be bitter too #(for the record I do think people care about andrew ie nicky wymack betsy etc but from andrew’s pov… baby has abandonment issues) #andrew minyard #aftg #all for the game #tfc

[bamsara]

So is the reason for Tyren getting more unhinged the side effects of the devotion necklace, or was this a downward spiral he would have gone done regardless of the necklace? I remember you talking about how the necklaces have consequences, and I'm curious if this is one of them.

Yeah!

Tyren would have been an already overly-doting and even jealous character on his own without the loyalty necklace, (and had been due to his crush on the Lamb even before recieving it, and what happens when you reject followers in-game) but his spiral into a unhealthy obsession and idolization was aided by the loyalty necklace.

If it was given to perhaps a regular, less devoted follower, the effects maybe wouldn't have had such severity. But Lamb got the materials/necklace from the mystic seller and isn't fully aware of the effects it might have on their followers yet.

So, dog is unhinged a bit on his own, but amplified by the necklace. He's originally friendly, caring and sweet. But you take good traits, too much of a good thing, and they can turn bad

#I want to talk about Tyren in stream again or go on a ramble #he's a character i want readers to like but also i dont want them to LIKE LIKE him #i want to write him in a way that makes you wonder if he did not go down this path he would actaully be someone you'd want to be friends wi #what ifs and what not #also in some reality there would people rooting for tyren in his corner because in his point of view #hes known the lamb for a long time and has been their friend and confidant #and has cared about them and even had a crush on them for quite a while #then suddenly this cat appears and everything feels wrong #dont get me wrong tyren is meant to be a good friend turned bad guy #but i was also never meant to get attatched to and develop the side characters as i have been doing slkdghsld #okay ive rambled enough #tyren oc #trod au

[khruschevshoe]

There's something to be said about Heaven Sent/Hell Bent, despite the Doctor overthrowing the Time Lord Council and spending four and a half billion years in the confession dial and him and Clara and Me meeting at the end of universe, therefore technically spanning the longest time span, being fundamentally the smallest in stakes of any of the modern Doctor Who finales. At the end of the day, there is no threat to earth or the galaxy or the universe or reality. It's just about two people and the way that they turn each other inside out and the way that they reflect each other as two sides of the same coin and the way their relationship was always going to end this way- with the flip of the coin, spinning in the air, each trying to override the other, each trying to take control of the story, each haunting each other forever.

It's under my microscope. It's rotating rent free in my head. It's everything good about Moffat's writing- fairytale vibes, wrenching character work, two characters that thematically parallel each other- and none of the bad, because he's not trying to be too clever or fuck with the rules too much, there's a couple of simple concepts played straight to their inevitable conclusions: Clara Oswald needs to die but the Doctor can't let it happen, he wants her to forget but she can't let it happen, so they both will do the most devasting things in the world to stop the other and they both get their way in the end but only in a way that will leave them haunting each other forever.

And it's so fucking good.

#also the music SLAPS #i have had “a duty of care” playing in my head over and over again for the last couple of days #twelveclara #listen twelveclara has suddenly become my favorite companion pairing tied with tenmartha and ninerose #doctor who #clara oswin oswald #clara oswald #heaven sent #hell bent #whouffaldi #twelfth doctor #listen i still have my moffat hang-ups but this episode convinced me #i UNDERSTAND how his doctor who works now #i get the vision #don't always agree with the execution but god when he nails it he NAILS IT

[simcardiac-arrested]

(sprays you) (sprays you) (sprays you) (sprays you) (spr

#zoc made me remember she exists and i wanted to draw her suddenly. Hai zoc #myart #oc: delicious rainbow’s colors #i almost messed her name up again …….. grrr #her fingers are different from her ref because she always colors them differently if u care #eyestrain #i shuppose

[positivelyadhd]

cannot express enough how important it is to just,, go out and be around people occasionally (for fun! not work!!)

#always feel like everything is awful and then i go see a concert or a friend and suddenly everything feels okay again <3 #recovery #self care

[lucyvsky]

c!karl - love and other poisons

because there are graveyards, adira bennett / anne carson / franz kafka / richard siken / henrietta harris, cover up / chen chen / hannah kent /  the green knight / 1984

#UNFINISHED WEB WEAVE NUMBER ONE #web weave #web weaving #um. yeah baby #i have a bunch of these that are all supposed to be connected but i adore this one so you get it right now #if i suddenly decide to work on it again please pretend like you've never seen it before #c!karl #anne carson #richard siken #the green knight #if you see me reuse quotes no you didnt #i do not really care about how this one does this is just for me #dsmp

[pansyfemme]

i am so fucking done with living like a depressed person. i cant make the mental illness go away but i want to stop living like i am mentally ill dear god

#i cant keep living in messy depression rooms and eating one meal a day i literally cannot go on but everytime i try to quit once the mania #dies down and i stop cleaning and taking care of myself and being regular with my meds the cycle starts again and suddenly im back where i #started. im so sick of this #having severe treatment resistant depression is less of a mental illness and more of a curse to make everyone in your life find you at least #slightly disgusting forever. sick of it

[valcaine]

*Glides down into you inbox*

I got two things!

Um ok for the first you said you wanted drawing ideas? Mmm have Philza going mock fucking 10 as tech holds a speedometer and ran panics

And also what other cursed birdza/ emerald duo headcanons do you have

Teeth stew anon you have sparked my interest

-I'te

*takes off*

they are trying to see if his wings healed

(they did) (he destroyed the lawn)

cursed headcanons? uhhh philza can and will eat bugs and mice, he is the resident pest killer

#I have many more headcanons but that’s the only one I can think of rn LMAO #this ask has been sitting in my inbox for over a month but suddenly art block snuck up on me #so have this #I have also been busy with minecraft server stuff !!! and roleplay !!! #art coming soon about it even tho I am pretty sure no one really wants to hear about ocs but eh who cares #I also have a few mcyt drawings planned #though they may not be finished for a bit fsghabna #anyways that’s the life update #technoblade #philza #ranboo #nihachu #dream smp #dream smp syndicate #how do I tag again on here wai #art #digital art #doodle #asks #do send more asks !! could be doodle req or not #dsmp #vals doodle extravaganza #vals percieving box

[lunarharp]

being attached to that moment qifrey held a baby one time and my ideas for the future :)

#witch hat tag #orufrey #brief small post before i return to Real and Emotional things again...but tbh...this makes me feel real emotions too #i think the manga will end up with a epilogue chapter showcasing little things in the girls' future and orufrey holding hands or kissing... #to like Indicate things. if it doesn't happen beforehand. #But. Who. Knows. also then i suddenly started thinking about them raising a baby for ages today because of how narratively poignant it'd be #for things to end that way after having raised almost-daughters all those years. and how healing it could be for qifrey and etc. #thing i said on twt: girls visit so often that the kid's first words are Professor Olly #“deja vu.. i'm not your professor kid - i'm your father!” #sorry but they are literally a gay couple where one truly is like The Mom and one truly is The Dad. to me #i think a housewifey homemaker type lifestyle would make qifrey happy. be harder now that he's disabled - well that's why he has his man. #i dont normally care about stuff like fankids or whatever..characters becoming parents for real..but like..Come on #This is the couple to think about this with.....they already ARE parents..i want them to be happy for eternity #once all the horrors are over we have to make it there.....children are so precious families are so precious.... #i have bad relationship with parents personally and haven't interacted with children in years. And yet i still know that. #the fact that orufrey fight for children to be safe and educated and happy...qif wants to help coustas too.. #aaaanyway today was a pretty weird and difficult day so i deserved to think about happy futures for a bit. i hear it's possible #btw i'm most sure about tetia becoming the princess of zozah. i think that will happen. and riche should have the ribbon tassel.

[clownehonk]

haha uh oh

#media i was into when i was younger being suddenly popular again is like whiplash #these two are honestly the only ones i cared about from it tbh #their vibes sure are something #ranfren #randals friends #nyon catman #nyen catman #nyen ranfren #nyon ranfren #ranfren fanart #my art

[flowercrowngods]

i’ve decided to send an ask for each story you posted in the wip game kdnehdhs who did this to you? lives rent free in my brain 💛💛 (@a-little-unsteddie)

thank you so much 🥰🤍 still slowly working my way through the asks, so have a few more words to make up for the wait 🫶

who did this to you (pt.4) // tales of blue part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | read on ao3 🌷 preceding snippet no 1. | no. 2

Finally, finally, the familiar sound of Wayne‘s old truck rounding the corner into the trailer park interrupts the tense silence that seems to have fallen over all of Forest Hills tonight, and Eddie has half a mind to run out there, run toward them and get the whole story. Just to be sure that everything is fine. Just to be sure that Steve’s still… That he’s still there.

He stays right where he is, though, staring at Buckley‘s wild hair, feeling her shadow walk over him as Wayne pulls up to their driveway and stops. She is right in the centre of the headlights, but still she doesn’t move. Eddie wants to scream at her. Wants to nudge her and shove her out of the way — imagines it, imagines all the alternate universes in which he finds her wide eyes scared and unseeing as Wayne‘s voice sounds behind them, telling them that Steve didn’t make it.

Except in this one, Wayne said they’re coming home. In this one, shit like that doesn’t happen to eighteen year-old boys and their friends.

Aside from that girl. Barbara Holland.

Eddie swallows, his eyes flitting between bright lights to the silhouette of Buckley right in their centre. Like a doe, he thinks. Terrified of what she’ll find.

Don’t you wanna know? Eddie wants to ask her. Don’t you wanna see? What are you afraid of? What did you see? Who is he, Robin, and who are you? Why the fuck won’t you move?

In the end, it is the sound of a car door slamming shut that snaps Buckley out of her stupor, and she all but flies off the steps towards the truck. Towards where Eddie can vaguely make out the shape of a badly bruised face, the play of light and darkness not enough to conceal the deep purple splotches or the sluggishness of his movements as he raises his head. Turning toward Buckley like a flower to the sun.

She presses her hand to the window for a second, just looking at him — and Eddie is glad he can’t see either of their faces. He has a feeling that what he’d see there would haunt him forever.

#steddie fic #steddie #who did this to you #who did this to you part 4 #make me write ask game #i don’t. i don’t know why this is suddenly so dark. but maybe it’s because eddie‘s not important anymore #and he knows. but he wants to crawl his way back to being in the situation just as badly as he wants to run from it #and i think that’s just. scary. petrifying. he doesn’t need to be brave now he doesn’t need to be strong for anyone. #because robin and steve have each other now and he knows snd its fine bc he doesn’t know them yknow but. #i also think eddie just wants to sit on the floor again and not be part of anything. and at the same time take care of these two. #he also wants a hug. needs one. deserves one. and wayne will provide don’t worry. but eddie’s sorta dissociated from the situation now #and that’s the worst thing that can happen to anyone who’s telling a story yknow. well anyway. sorry jfjfjdhdh shutting up now

[front-facing-pokemon]

#doublade #single face under the cut. just the one of them #this? well. this is just two honedge put together and turned pink. this is a very boring evolution. i know i just talked this line up #on the honedge post and i do still think it's really cool but i think aegislash getting a shield is like. cool and adds something new #to the pokémon. but this really just adds Another honedge to make Double Honedge #it's reminiscent of magneton. where they just put three of them together. and suddenly it's a new pokémon. and idk how i feel about That #so i don't really care for this specific evolution of this line. although i still like the line in general #reminiscent of chespin → quilladin → chesnaught‚ where i really like either end but the middle is #…………………………quilladin…………………………… #yuck. and don't you dare all start killing me again because i KNOW AT LEAST SOME OF YOU AGREE WITH ME

[cissi-sh01]

Dubai Open gave us a Captain Rublev (Thank you, whoever came up with that idea THANK YOU), so:

#tennis #tennis art #andrey rublev #no one cares but this is with reference to Good Luck!! (2003) #i.e. the cutes tv series that ever exsisted #in which Kimutaku single handed saved a almost bankrupt airline #and it is the actual airline in reality not in the tv series #because he was so cool and so cute that everyone suddenly had hope in the airline businesses again #anyways i just want to say its a very cute series #please go watch

[hamartia-grander]

Just talked to my brother on the phone for an HOUR. that's more than he ever talks to me in a week when we're home. Yay <3

#Sorry I'm back flipping with joy this is the brother who decided he suddenly hated me about five years ago and #he's only recently started to care about me again #It's probably the 2 year age gap for some reason that's like number 1 sibling rivalry age gap #I love all of my siblings so dearly but I'm especially happy when he wants to talk to me because he NEVER does #He'd never admit it but this is how I know he misses me #He also just casually offered to bring me along with him and his gf when they went somewhere I was like you NEVER invite me

[seagreenstardust]

Just realizing again that Izuku matters to Katsuki. Izuku has always mattered to him, and we know that because Katsuki could never just let Izuku go.

So what if Deku was more inherently heroic than he was at five years old? The kid was quirkless and clearly never going to be a hero, so what did it matter? He could have just lived his life, moved on, not cared.

But even as young as he was some part of Katsuki knew Izuku was his person, his rival. He’s always known that quirkless Deku was the one he’d have to beat to prove himself. Katsuki made Izuku the most important person in his life by continuing to focus on him, by seeing him as a threat. Yeah he dealt with it badly and yeah it was unhealthy and wrong and honestly tragic, but that doesn’t change the fact that Izuku has mattered to Katsuki from the start.

#I need to go to bed #but the brain won’t stop thinking about bkdk #otl #bkdk #bakudeku #izuku midorya #katsuki bakugo #katsuki tried to move on and not care after the slime monster frankly #and that lasted only as long as it took for Izuku to show up at UA with a quirk #and suddenly it was no holds barred war #and Izuku was right back front and center stage of Katsuki’s mind again #this post has been brought to you by me thinking about the bkdk apology and how sincere it was