#talk of past torture

[villainousshakespeare]

Therapy Fit for a God Chapter 14

Loki/OFC Rated E  Trigger Warnings: Smut (previous chapters) Sex, Angst, talk of suicide, therapy, unhealthy family dynamics, mention of torture and mind control, touch starved

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13

Loki’s plans to conquer and rule Midgard have come to a disastrous end. After being captured by the Avengers, he is being held on Earth. Odin has refused to interfere, and the outlook for the God of Mischief appear bleak. His only hope may lie in one mortal woman, a Psychiatric expert brought in to interrogate him.

Dr. Caroline Thorpe is intrigued by Loki and thinks that more lies beneath his actions than is commonly known. Can she find out the truth before he is shipped off to die for crimes against the Earth? And can Loki bring himself to care?

So sorry for the delay on this. My father in law passed away two weeks ago, and family matters have consumed my life in the interim.

In any event, I hope you enjoy this plot heavy chapter! I promise there will be more smut to come. (no pun...)

@yespolkadotkitty @just-the-hiddles @hopelessromanticspoonie @wine-and-whines @arch-venus25 @caffiend-queen @devilish–doll @enchantedbyhiddles @hiddlesholic @i-do-not-fangirl-i-fanwoman @kellatron55 @ladyoftheteaandblood @latent-thoughts @yespolkadotkitty@maryxglz @myoxisbroken @nuggsmum @nildespirandum @pedeka @redfoxwritesstuff @sinfully-lustful-darling @vodka-and-some-sass @wrathkitty @kingtwhiddleston @wolfsmom1 @poetic-fiasco @shiningloki @dangertoozmanykids101 @bookworm-christina @amwolowicz @delightfulheartdream @frostbitten-written @what-a-flammable-heart @tom-hlover @nonsensicalobsessions @myraiswack @loki-yoursaviourishere @ghostypau @ms-cellanies @colorfulfreakstudentpizza @mareebird @colorfulfreakstudentpizza  @szycha22 @chokemedaddyloki @queenofallhobos @just-the-hiddles-reads  @alwida10  @justjoanne242 @chantsdemarins @lovelysizzlingbluebird​

"Oh dear," Caroline felt a blush consume her skin, "this is not going to go well at all, is it?"

One moment she had been anticipating Loki's return with eagerness and a small touch of anxiety (who knew what her decadent God would come up with), and the next a bright light and loud crash sent pieces of wood flying through the air. As she blinked to clear her eyes, she knew a moment of blind panic. There, glaring through the new hole in the wall next to the door that could very easily have been opened, stood her friend, patient, and sometime employer Tony Stark in his full Iron suit.

"Stay away from her!" Loki snarled, shoving Stark to the ground as he rushed to Caroline's side, protectively shielding her from him. "Are you injured darling?"

"I'm fine," she assured him, a warm rush of emotion coursing through her at his words. "Just a little startled."

"You are sure? If there is so much as a scratch on you, tell me so that I may make this worm bleed in return."

"Get away from her, you sick bastard!" Tony shouted in his turn, stepping into the room.

"Tony, it's not what it looks like," she blurted out, embarrassed as her position and lack of clothing brought about the realization of just what it did look like.

"It is alright, Doctor Thorpe, we will not let my brother take any further advantage of you."

Oh good, Thor was here too. Caroline groaned internally as she stared from one angry male to the next, wishing that the bed might swallow her whole.

"I would never take advantage of her!" Loki protested hotly. "Not unless she were perfectly willing!"

"And I suppose she was perfectly willing to be tied half naked to your bed?" Tony sneered.

"More than willing," Loki shot back. "Enthusiastic. Tell them, Min kjaereste, tell them you want to be here!"

"I did until a few moments ago," she said with a rueful half grin.

"You have mind controlled her!" Tony insisted. "We've seen how you turn people into your murder puppets. Now you've stepped it up to making them sex dolls as well?"

"Hey!" Caroline protested.

"I am not controlling her! Have you forgotten that I am no longer in possession of the scepter with the mind stone?"

"Really? It was her idea to be tied to your bed?"

"Well, actually..." Loki puffed out his chest, a smirk on his handsome face.

Caroline sighed, realizing it was up to her to end this farce. So much for her lovely idyl with Loki away from outside interference. She should have known it was too good to last.

"Enough," she did her best to summon her professional voice, not the easiest thing considering her state of undress. "I am not being mind controlled and I am certainly not a sex doll. Really, Tony!"

"In my defense, you would make a smoking hot one," he assured her, causing Loki to grip his knives tighter.

"Loki, perhaps you could stop growling long enough to untie me?" she suggested, wondering how on earth she had ended up in this situation.

Loki looked at her, blinked, and waved away her bonds while at the same time materializing shorts to cover her more. Bringing her arms down, she pushed herself up to a sitting position and placed a soothing hand on Loki's shoulder.

"Now, perhaps we could all go out into the living room and talk about this like civilized adults."

"You really are not under his magic?" Thor asked, voice confused as she rose from the bed.

"Only the magic of his personality."

"Oh yeah, he's all charm," Tony snarked, glaring at the snarling God.

"Living room, now," she commanded, done with all three of them.

Not waiting to see if they followed her, Caroline crossed to the door and deliberately opened it, ignoring the gaping hole in the wall. She took the large recliner, deciding it gave the greatest sense of power in the room. Loki stayed close by her side, hovering half behind, half next to her chair as Tony and Thor reluctantly took a seat on the sofa.

"Now, first things first," she said, wanting to cut off any attempts of one of them to steer the conversation back into dangerous waters. "How did you find us?"

"Your shield ID pin," Stark answered. "There's a tracker located on the back of it."

"You bugged her?" Loki snarled.

"Is that regulation?" she asked, startled.

"I like to keep tabs on the people I care about," Tony shrugged. "Particularly when I know they're consorting with dangerous criminals."

"Loki, I am so sorry," she told him. "I led them here."

"Sorry? For helping in your own rescue?" Tony's voice was incredulous.

"I was not in need of rescuing," she snapped back. "I don't know where you got the idea that Loki kidnapped me."

"Well, it was either that or you staged a jailbreak, and I know you would never do that... right?"

"They were going to kill him," she said in her defense.

"Okay, I'm going back to the brainwashing theory," Stark said.

"Look, I did what was asked of me," Caroline sought for calm amidst the bristling hostility in the air. "I talked to Loki about the lead up to the invasion, both immediate and going back some time. To say that there were extenuating circumstances is to grossly downplay the situation."

"Doctor, I know he can be extremely persuasive," Thor told her in a voice just sympathetic enough to be patronizing, "but Loki is very talented at spinning lies. He is not called Silver Tongue without good reason."

"Oh, she knows all about that, don't you pet?" Loki purred unhelpfully, brushing her hair from one shoulder and making her face heat again.

"Wow. There is an image I'm never going to get out of my brain, no matter how much bleach or tequila I try," Tony shuddered.

"The point is," she muscled through with gritted teeth, "Loki was not responsible for his actions. Thor, were you aware that for months leading up to the New York invasion, Loki was imprisoned, tortured, and subjected to all sorts of mental conditioning?"

"Is this true, Loki?" Thor's voice was suddenly awash in concern, and his guileless blue eyes misted over a bit.

"You never even bothered to look for him!" Caroline's anger bubbled to the surface at Thor's display of emotion now that the damage was done. "None of you, his so called family, could be bothered to search when your brother threw himself to his death in the middle of an identity crises."

"He was in crises?" Thor asked in a small voice.

"Well how would you feel? Really, Thor, how would you feel if you found out your whole life the people who were supposed to be protecting you had been feeding you lies? If you found out the truth was that you were from a loathed enemy who your own brother had sworn to exterminate? Do you think, if you can think, that you might just have a small problem reconciling all of that while, I don't know, trying to be King because your father conveniently fell asleep?"

"That wasn't in the reading," Tony said into the silence that followed her angry stream of questions.

"I would never have hurt you, Loki," Thor said at last with pleading eyes. "You are my brother, no matter what your species."

"Well, that's nice," Caroline's anger had lowered to a simmer, but it was far from burned out, "but unfortunately Pierce and his goons do not have the same familial sentiment to fall back on."

"He did kill a ton of people," Stark pointed out, almost regretfully.

"I told you, he was conditioned, mind controlled," she spoke before Loki had the chance to let fly with an ill timed barb. "The weapon he used to control others was in turn controlling him."

"Tortured or not, Loki's mind is a formidable thing, highly trained," Thor sounded doubtful. "What could possibly overpower him in that way?"

"Compared to you, Sleipnere's mind is formidable," Loki said, but with wry affection he could not hide in his voice. "It's an infinity stone, Thor. The jewel in the Scepter is the Mind Stone. Even I was eventually no match for it when wielded by one who knew how."

"Who, brother? Who was behind this?" Thor sounded truly alarmed now.

"Thanos," Loki sighed, the name sounding vile on his tongue. "Thanos and his Obsidian Order seek the Infinity Stones. I need not tell you, if they acquire them all it will go ill all."

***

While he would have far preferred continuing with his original plan of teasing Caroline into a state of wanton frenzy before relenting and fucking her senseless, there was something sweet about watching her lash into Thor and Stark. She was so passionate in his defense, that he even could forgive her for making him sound in need of rescuing.

Certainly, it had had an effect on the two men who had come crashing into their retreat. Thor, that soft hearted idiot, was all but weeping by the time she was done. Even Tony Stark, the soulless narcissist he had heard so much about and enjoyed sparring with more than he cared to admit, looked a bit taken aback as Caroline recounted all that he had gone through.

It was all very amusing, in its way, until the damned stones came into the conversation. He had known he could not avoid it. They and the one who had sent him for them were at the heart of the whole ugly mess. Still, of all the memories he most wished to banish forever, those of Thanos and his "children" were among the worst.

"Okay, so I am guess that the Infinity Stones are not a Power Band," Tony said, once again breaking the silence. "Someone want to fill me in on what they are?"

"Vesels of primordial force so powerful that they can create or destroy worlds," Thor's voice was hushed and serious. "They have been here since the beginning of this universe. One is enough to travel through time, or alter reality, or control a mind even as strong as Loki's. But if one were to assemble them all, they would have power to rival the AllFather."

"Putting aside Big Daddy for a moment," Tony said, "you are saying that the scepter currently sitting in a lab in the SHIELD base is powerful enough to end the world?"

"By itself, no," Loki assured him. "The scepter holds the Mind Stone. Alone, that can win you armies, but at a price."

"Not a price I'd willingly pay again," Loki added.

His memories of the days leading up to the Chitari attack through his time in the cell at SHIELD were a blur to him. Most of the time, he preferred it that way. He was aware of his actions, but it almost seemed to him as though someone else had committed them. For a being who valued control as much as Loki, it had been unbearable.

"Alright, let's say I believe you," Tony had risen from the couch and begun to pace. "Let's say that you were this innocent little Space Prince who just happened to stumble into the wrong crowd. Why not say so? Why run? And why take my doc with you?"

"She is not yours!"

The very idea of this insignificant human claiming ownership of any sort over Caroline made Loki's blood pound in his ears. She deserved far more than any of the pathetic mortals could hope to give her, even one who's intelligence seemed at least to extend slightly beyond the norm.

"Down boy, no need to pee on her," Stark said crudely.

"I told you," Caroline answered, once more laying a calming hand on Loki. "The word was already circulating that Pierce meant to kill him that night."

"That's why he sent me on that fool errand!" Loki rolled his eyes as he saw the lightbulb flash on behind his brother's eyes. "I knew there was no reason for one of my prowess to subdue some puny group of arms traders! He knew I would not allow them to murder you."

"With you gone, and Fury AWOL, there was no one there to speak up. That left it up to me to get him out of there."

Caroline spoke as if singlehandedly breaking a prisoner out of one of the most secure facilities on the planet were task anyone might have thrust upon them. Once more in awe of her courage, Loki took her hand and raised it wordlessly to his lips.

"I thank you, Doctor Thorpe," Thor told her.

"I didn't intend on escaping with him, that was an accident," she added. "Actually, we couldn't have escaped at all if you hadn't given me Fury's password, and the hint to getting into the rest of his office."

"That's why you called, me," Tony shook his head. "Son of a bitch."

"I just meant to take the key for his cuffs," she went on. "But when I saw the cube, I realized it was one of the stones Loki had told me about. I wanted him to take it away, where it wouldn't bring danger to our world."

"Fortunately for me," Loki smirked. "Thank you, Stark, for your assistance. Without the Tesseract, I might have escaped myself, but I would not have had such enchanting company."

"I would think twice about bringing us back, Tony," Caroline said, smiling blandly at her friend. "If we are forced to stand trial, it would be only a matter of time before they asked how I got into Fury's office. I would hate for you to get into trouble for helping me."

"Why Doctor Caroline Thorpe, are you blackmailing me?" Tony asked, eyes wide.

"Let's call it mutually assured destruction," she smiled in return. "You let us be, we don't turn you in either."

Loki's heart sored at her words. That she would take such an audacious stance for him was humbling. He knew not what he had done to earn her fierce loyalty, but he vowed in that moment to do everything in his power to be worthy of it.

"Are you sure you aren't brainwashing her? She's never been this insubordinate before."

"I never had something so worth fighting for before. Look, Tony, what it really comes down to is that I'm asking you to trust me."

Stark looked back and forth from Caroline to Loki, shaking his head in disbelief.

"Alright," he said at last. "Where are the rest of these poprocks, and how do we get them off of Earth?"

#Loki #Loki Fan Fic #Post Avengers Assemble #Thor #Tony Stark #Loki/OFC #Avengers Fan Fic #Loki needs a hug #talk of past abuse #talk of past trauma #Talk of past torture #Loki gets therapy #Odin's A+ parenting #in defense of loki #Smut in previous chapters

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

You can wash off the makeup, but the mascara still runs.

[First] Prev <—>Next

#Poorly Drawn MDZS #MDZS #wei wuxian #season 1 #This is the scene in every highschool drama where the MC overhears someone talking abt them in the bathroom #I was trying to go for a 'your cringe' -esque crying face but i think ill save that for a cloud recess flashback #Yeah i could have added more context here #yeah im following rule of funny 99% of the time for this project #I love how this is set up without really going into too much detail about the past here. Its a secret torture tool for later angst #by this I mean WWXs guilt #Also; if im planning this correctly-this comic comes out the day of or the day after I have a funeral to attend so...me too buddy...me too. #Onwards to ep 3!

[melonisopod]

“The moral of Shrek is that a woman would rather marry a hideous ogre than a short man,” actually the moral is that men will literally call for a woman’s execution as soon as she’s not thin and pretty. Did you miss the part where Fiona turns into an ogre and suddenly Lord Fuckwad is like “What is that THING? It’s hideous! Guards, kill it!” like he knew that was still Fiona right? Fiona was willing to work it out and get to know Fuckhead even though she wasn’t crazy about dating a short guy but Lord Fuckboy went right to kill mode when she wasn’t everything he wanted.

#shrek #misogyny #granted the short jokes about lord fuckboy were cause the execs were beefing with each other #the main issue with him though is that he's a...well you know...farquaad #his first scene is torturing a cookie and talking about the evil fairy tale creatures ''poisoning my perfect world'' #basically he's a fantasy racist #and that's the first thing we learn about him #also the point was very much fiona being able to see past shrek being an ogre and accept both herself and him #in a lot of ways this is such a *chef's kiss* peak cinema #it's not without its flaws though

[baldurs-gate-official]

Thinking about Astarion and trauma again (shocking)

He really is the first character I've seen that depicts PTSD/C-PTSD the way he does. He's angry. He's collecting the pieces of himself he had to chip away over the years and figuring out how to fit them back together again, and it's hard.

I rarely see good PTSD rep in media (and C-PTSD is even less depicted/understood). And when I do, it's always the soft pitiable side of it. The side of it that's more palatable and easy to accept. But the reality is that the trauma that stems from such abuse can be vicious, and messy. It can lash out and push people away. Bring out the worst in you, at times. It can be so, so angry.

I love that we see that in Astarion. Both because it's good representation, and because I'm a survivor too. I'm angry. I'm upset. I want to kick and scream about it, but I can't. I feel like I must always remain in control, or that displaying those feelings will only hurt those around me and push them away. I don't want that. I don't want to hurt others or be alone.

Seeing Astarion do those things, being angry and messy over it all... It makes me so happy. He says things to Cazador I wish I could say to my own abusers, with no regard to how others perceive it. He doesn't hold back. And I get to see a character with a very similar kind of trauma do/say the things I only dream about, and not be abandoned for it. He's given the chance to heal and grow as a person, and feel loved. He gets to have a happy ending.

And he gets to be mad. And that's ok.

#bg3 #astarion #text post #cw trauma #cw ptsd #ive never seen a character before with such a similarish past to mine #i feel so seen and understood #i hate that ive had to be silent about it #i hate it so much #it means SO much to see a character with such good CPTSD rep #and see so many people love his character #i recently escaped my own abusers so this sort of thing makes me very emotional #the way he talks about torture too and doesnt try to sugar coat it #i was tortured too. my bones were broken repeatedly for someone elses amusement and it was fucking horrible #years of that #and starvation #among other things #and ive never seen a character before thats been through something similar #ive never even seen a character before this that specifically has CPTSD #ive seen characters who *should* have been written with CPTSD but its as if the writers just googled PTSD and went with that #(C-PTSD comes from continued exposure to trauma over the course of months or years where PTSD is often from a singular event) #(the symptoms differ a bit. and Astarion is a very good example of C-PTSD) #it just makes me really happy. and it makes me feel like people might understand and not blame me for what happened #well. some people do anyway. but. this kind of representation helps a lot with helping people understand #seriously though ive had people act like theyd have fared better in my situation. or blamed me for what happened #how fucked is that???? i want to chew glass whenever it happens #its always people whove never had any experience with abuse too #but they have the audacity to tell me theyre built different or something #q

[bumblingbabooshka]

 🗣🚨 YAOI ALERT 🚨🗣 [TEXT: Neelix took a seat next to Tuvok. He hoped the Vulcan would make some comment about his story, but a long silence ensued. Neelix found himself feeling unaccountably nervous, reading into Tuvok's silence a general disapproval - and yet, what could he expect? From the moment they first met, Tuvok had been aloof and judgmental. Nonetheless, his opinion mattered to Neelix, and so, inwardly chastising himself for doing so, he turned to the somber man. "So, Mr. Vulcan...what did you think of my story?" Another silence. Neelix felt himself begin to perspire. Why wasn't Tuvok answering him? Had he embarrassed himself that fully? He felt his heart beating in his chest. "I know I've done some awful things in my life," he stammered, "but I've tried to make up for them. I hope you won't hold what I've told you against me..." He trailed off lamely, his words sounding hollow. Tuvok turned slowly to look at him, his dark visage glistening in the heat of the setting sun. His eyes seemed to pierce Neelix's brain. He stared like that for a full moment before he spoke. "I found it an exceptional story. You have complexities, and courage, I would never have imagined." Neelix couldn't believe what he was hearing - Tuvok was actually complimenting him! He felt a little shiver of pleasure, but he couldn't for the life of him think of anything to say in return...] Source: Pathfinders by Jeri Taylor

#Tuvok/Neelix #WHAT WAS THE MOMENT FULL OF. HUH? #NEELIX'S CRUSH ON TUVOK IS SO REAL #Tuvok: Ugh Neelix. #Neelix: -tells a story about how he used to be a criminal and has had a lot of angst and heartbreak in his life- #Tuvok: Wo w......-twirling hair- I didn't know you like...had complexity. You're like such a tortured soul ..... #Neelix: ('I didn't imagine you had complexities or courage' flying over his head) O mmmghmygod #I know Tuvok is just saying 'I didn't imagine you would have had a past like that given how cheerful you are now' #like those 'we all have the homies whose jovial nature can't quite hide their aura of sadness' posts #But I think his phrasing is funny - especially bc the author is using commas to mimic how he pauses in his speech #Also him just straight up not responding to Neelix is funny. DUDE. C'MOOOON. <3 #CAN WE TALK ABOUT NEELIX'S HARDCORE CRUSH ON TUVOK??? THAT DESCRIPTION??? #I'm so sorry there is NO straight and friendly explanation for 'his dark visage glistening...his eyes seemed to pierce [my] mind...' #SHIVERING IN PLEASURE???? NEELIX. #Novel Experiences #Neelix is so hopelessly in love with Tuvok he is sustaining himself on CRUMBS #If Tuvok gave Neelix a pencil Neelix would treasure it forever - HELP HIM. #they are so highschool despite being in their (nebulous middle age?) and (hundreds) #Tuvix #Tuvok #Neelix #I love how there's not really even a straight excuse reason for why Neelix likes Tuvok IN PARTICULAR so much #Almost as if- #voy

[rainbow-nijisaki]

Joshua with his familiar Shiraha from @ayahachitwister 's halloween-themed fanfic, The World Ends with Witches. Been wanting to draw him for a while now. Chapter 80 is out, go read it!

#twewy #ntwewy #yoshiya joshua kiryu #the world ends with witches #ayahachitwister #my art #going to talk spoilers in the tags #so I've been worried about this boy ever since the gang went after Hex Cait #pretty sure I caught all the foreshadowing over the past 12 or so chapters as well...thanks for the torture aya. #anyway have a pic of these two in calmer circumstances before everything goes to hell #...pretty sure that's where chapter 81's going

[just-someone-online]

Honestly, if I could change one thing about Arcee and Airachnid's history, I'd cut Tailgate out entirely. I know it's been said before, but Tailgate is just Cliffjumper but again. Like, both his toy and character model are just different recolors of Cliff. Hell, the character model is just a different shade of red and scratched up to hell and back.

The way I'd have done it (Or rather the one way I can think of), Arcee still would have been captured and interrogated, and her hatred of Airachnid would come from everything she endured before being rescued. Cos like, I know that wasn't the only time Cee's been captured during the war (Hello, Out of the Past), but Airachnid seems far more adept at torturing prisoners than Starscream. Yeah, they both draw out the process, but Airachnid keeps her eye on her prey and makes them suffer instead of gloating and taunting them.

I imagine that Airachnid's methods would stick with anybody who survived them, and Arcee would want to pay her back in full.

#tfp #transformers prime #transformers #arcee #airachnid #late night ramblings #i say 'late night' but the sun's rising #idk i might just be talking out of my ass #like #yeah out of the past left a mark on arcee too #(notice her reluctance to use the cortical psychic patch in sick mind) #but airachnid *is* more adept at torture than starscream #it was fairly easy for arcee and cliff to break their bonds and fuck up starscream but that was *not* going to happen with airachnid #if cliffjumper and bumblebee hadn't come for her i doubt arcee would have survived

[ahalliance]

this bit from baghs’ lore is haunting me . a blackboard with all the francophones’ initals . were all of them originally island experiments that managed to escape like qbaghs?

#qsmp #baghera jones #french lore goes haaaaaard #like . okay . baghs was a child hybrid experiment who grew up with the feds then eventually managed to escape . #we know Someone was asked and then instructed to Get Her Back #which we think means the whole crashing the plane on purpose thing . which we think kameto orchestrated #and all the other francophones have Some sort or connection to the island and experiments as well #étoiles serving as a test subject during his code fights for the feds #the feds nearly torturing aypierre to death (fucked up . btw can we talk about that) to get info out of him #and then performing some dubious ass unknown procedure on him to save his life #antoine has less tying him to the feds as of Now but we know he doesn’t hold as much hatred for the feds as the others do . like he’s very #neutral and almost lenient towards them (suceur de cucurucho . anw) #so there’s links for All of them . multiple hints pointing towards a shared islander past linked to the federation #maybe that explains why the federation seems so chill about them (in comparison to the brazilians lmao) #like . they’re not That outwardly aggressive towards them #maybe the Feds are just so smug and pleased that they got their experiments back that they don’t mind being lenient towards them now . #because they’ve got them back in their clutches and this time they won’t be able to leave #hmmmmmmm okay current theory: baghs n some of the others (at least aypierre and étoiles though probs antoine too) managed to escape the fed #kameto stayed behind for x reason idk he’s a fed simp . anw he was then instructed to orchestrate the plane crash to bring the others back #and he did . and the vague memories aypierre has and the ‘oh maybe they’re not so bad’ mentality antoine has #are just the old Feelings being stirred up by being back on the island despite the amnesia #okay boom im so smart #jay rambles #incredibly long tag set im not sorry

[haru-chi]

don't you think it's funny how the answer that Seiji might desperately searching for about the mask might be with Shuuichi even if he doesn't know the importance of it himself ...

while the answer that Shuuichi was dying to know ever since he entered the exorcist world about his family might be with Seiji ...

but with the communication and wariness issues between the two they just never talk and knew xDD

#natsume yuujinchou #natsuyuu #Shuuichi might never realize that ... #or even if he realizes Seiji have more knowledge about this world so he might know something he'd be too proudful to even ask #while on Seiji part I believe he might realize Shuuichi's desire but won't bother telling him either from “ignorant is bless” standpoint #or cuz why tell him if he never ask and watch him silently #or maybe he just doesn't know that this mask is with the Natori #either way .. I find it kinda funny and just something that might happen with them #seeing by how their relationship is ... #or maybe both know about all of this and we're the one behind ? #but judging by Shuuichi's reaction in the cousin arc he really doesn't know anything about the mask .... #and seeing how he doesn't know a thing about his family overall cuz they “hate him” is yeaaah ... #hated by both his family and the exorcist world .. no wonder he's in the dark about the deep stuff in this world from the past ... #while Seiji knows alot but won't bother to talk or express and would be the idiot part perfectly #the more so now that he's the Matoba's leader #my mind is running wild and trying to survive till next chapter #and knowing that we won't get any exorcist arc for a while is torture #unless .....

[worstloki]

literally who looks at avengers 1 loki and goes "oh ya that's a healthy guy who wants to be here"

#which of you is it #i just want to talk #like there is literally nothing in avengers 1 backing that up #fury: why do i feel like he's the only person on this boat that wants to be here? #well sir it's because your vibe checker is off #if you would take a look at the guy he's sitting there staring blankly at a wall and has been for the past 2 hours #the last time someone talked to him he started touching the walls after specifically being told if he did he would be dropped many feet #like come on man #fury like hey thor what r ur thoughts on torturing him like fury wasn't there when loki came out of the portal #face sweaty enough to restore the drying yangtze fr #im sorry who looks at loki saying ANYTHING in that movie and goes 'ah yes. he's sane.' #'completely mentally sound right now. all there. there is no sceptre or thanos or other influencing him. he wants this. they help him.' #like COME ON

[yeonban]

Sometimes I think about posting the one meme which goes "I want to ____ you" and see what your muses fill it in with for my muses but knowing my muses, I can already foresee an army of "kick" "beat" and "kill" <- in that order

#tbd. #* ooc. / posts. #ADHUISADHASUHDSAHD to be fair I too would beat them all up! ^_^ maybe kiss their wounds afterwards idk but FIRST. kick!!! #Anw I've been legit fighting for my life irl for the past few days and am being tortured by my own traitorous body as we speak #but I hope against hope that I'll soon be free to write and reply to dms bc lord knows when I last was able to... #My profs are the personification of irritating bc the SECOND we think we finished all our assignments and can breathe for 2 seconds #we receive 30 new emails saying hi! forgot to tell you this but you have a 12 page long assignment by the (checks watch) end of this week #like??!??!?!!? did ~3 of them for last Thursday now I have another 5 for Tuesday; 1 for Wednesday; 2 more for this Thursday #and then a random RNG one I guess bc my prof told us about it but then never posted the deadline. only an eerie 'by next week' #(aka this upcoming week) so fuck me I suppose AHDIUASHDISAHD #I just want to talk w my beloved friends and write silly things on tumblr dot com is that so much to ask for............. gawd

[instantpansies]

formal literary analysis is just fanfic for nerds

#i'm trying to write an analysis on the way the wizard of oz has been historically interpreted rn and it is going so bad #apparently i'm the only person who has ever put together just like. an actual paper (not a magazine article) comparing and contrasting #the various allegorical readings of oz?? and unfortunately i cannot analyze my own old writing #i need to pick a new topic but the paper is due tomorrow morning im so tired this is awful. im crying thinking about it #i have spent the past two days combing through oz analysis. i have not found a single source that doesn't directly just do its own analysis #i need analysis of the analysis does that make sense. and it has to be from the past five years. i am falling i am failing #i am drowning help me to breathe etc. this is torture and i cannot find a singular fucking source #JUST TELL ME ABOUT MORE THAN ONE INTERPRETATION!!! THAT IS ALL I FUCKING WANT FROM YOU JUST TELL ME THERES MULTIPLE WAYS #TO INTERPRET THIS 100 YEAR OLD BOOK. I KNOW YOU KNOW YOU MENTIONED IT IN UR INTRO #screaming crying throwing up. i gotta pick a new topic. im so tired. ignore this #anyways this post was an excuse for me to vent in tags sorry #free to rb the post if you want tho idc. i have a point u gotta admit #lit #toasty talks #wizard of oz

[codecicle]

Do you know any good qsmp lore supercuts? I want to watch more qsmp content (since i've really only been following along with liveblogs; i only really watched wilbur's vods almost up to when the eggs were first supposed to disappear) but there's so much to watch and it doesn't all hold my attention.

https://youtube.com/@QSMPInfo?si=FUrtOTX89-XRWLvF

^^ this is the official qsmp lore recap channel!! honestly the best source I think you could get they condense so much of it so well. as for more recent stuff they haven't gotten to yet I'd recommend going on twitter (yeah i know I'm sorry 😔) and looking through your language of choices update accounts!! they're all run by official admins and have translated updates on every streamer per day. its a lot of lore but also liveblogging is how most people consume other lore, since there are people constantly streaming on the server. i look through the qsmp tag when i wake up in the morning and get home from school like a newspaper LMAO

typically I'd just suggest the twitter accounts, the recap channel, picking at least 2 or 3 different streamers to watch casually and looking through liveblogs. im a huge charlie guy obviously but I've literally never seen a cellbit stream before despite him being one of my favorite characters, I only know him through other streams and liveblogging. my spanish streamers don't stream on there anymore (cmon mariana and rubius D:) and so i mainly get Spanish updates from Spanish speakers on here!! point is you're doing great already LMAO just watch some of the recaps and look through the update accounts and you'll be fine.

(plus every stream they have to relay old information from one person to another so eventually you will get a lore info dump if you want to or not)

#i make yet anothet post just for me 👍 #we have mail :] #AUGUAHJGFHH IM SORRY I DONT HAVE BETTER ANSWERS LMAO I WISH I DID!! #best recap of the story over the past couple of weeks that no channels have really covered: #the federation (big bad) kidnapped the eggs from the parents while everyone was asleep. this wasnt this first time theyve done this but!! #this time felt much different. like they were really gone for good. #forever was given brainwashing pills by cucurucho (federation worker/census bureau for the island) #and these pills fucked him up BAD. he keeps hearing a ticking clock sound and whenever it gets the loudest he snaps and takes more drugs #bbh has been grieving and every stream he loses a little more color. he lost all of his color and streamed his 'acceptance' stream #where he kidnapped the drugged members and put them in cages along with torturing fed members to get them to talk #phil finally logged back on and with tubbo and fit's (? I think) help they covered the main federation building in cobblestone and lava #essentially just griefed the server as a threat LMAO #phil wrote and delivered a note that essentially said 'give the eggs back by the end of the week. or else' #then we got cryptic messages that cellbit decoded #they said: 'the answer is not in the center' #that all leads to todays stream where charlie tubbo and roier went to the center of a maze they found through coords #(that fred not the feds gave to them in 3 seperate books) #and there was a wheel in the center surrounded by all of the eggs items. tubbo spun it and it landed on 5 #then lava poured from the ceiling and mobs spawned kicking all three of them out #now this saturday (or tomorrow i think?) is a huge stream that was teased a couple says ago with the roman numerals 2 #and the spinny wheel in the maze was written in roman numerals #so we think todays stream and all the lore is leading up to something with the eggs tomorrow/Saturday i forgor the date #and thats basically whats been happening this past few days!! theres a LOT more lore than normal dw we have just been experiencing. #The Horrors. this isnt normal LMAO #qsmp #<- forgot to tag this

[kyuzuberri]

man why does my family treat me like im not a human :(((

#Like bro i get it you all just woke up but like #I did not sleep at all + i was studying which made my brain numb #and when i wake up all annoyed you all tell me i got attitude issues??? #And lets ignore how my sisters literally TORTURE me to wake me up #And when im quiet all day yall ask me to talk??? #Dude talk about what you guys dont even want to listen to me? #and then when i talk to myself and inanimate objects you all start thinking i have a boyfriend? #what is that logic 😻😻😻 #maybe start considering me as a human who actually gets hurt and feels stuff ill start acting normal again #in the meantime #keep on using me for only your own purposes and talk to me when it concerns you only #and think of me doing stuff for you all as a “responsibility” that i have #BECAUSE IM NOT A HUMAN !!! #and ofc only my sister is stressed about her exams because i dont cry about it like her #oh no no wait till you find out what i actually did the whole past year cuz #i was so emotionally frustrated and brimming with all that ew emotions that i had to take out out somehow #its a shame how i think they know yet they dont care

[gideonisms]

Astral projects myself into a future that's better so I can have any motivation whatsoever to improve my life rather than continuing to girlrot in a sexy fashion ♥️

#the problem is i know exactly what to do to get somewhere objectively better and i am certain i'm capable of it #but. and i cannot emphasize this enough. every past success at living a normal life has FELT excruciating #i can do it it will simply feel like walking over hot coals the whole time #sometimes that's better than descending into the depression pit sometimes not. depends. how much debt am i in at the time #living in a society is a type of torture and i'm really going to be doing it the rest of my life. that has sunk in this year #but i have to be alive so i can do my hobbies and activities and read some books and talk about them with my friends and have a beverage #so i just have to live in a society #so that means i have to accomplish goals. but logic will only get you so far in that respect #i did finish the degree and etc but like. wouldn't it be sexier to lie here and maybe take a long bath #until someone tells me i have to stop or face legal consequences ♥️ #like don't get me wrong i'm trying to be concerned it's just not happening

[sambambucky]

yo how dare you make me cry in the morning like that! (absolutely loved the fic and would read it again in a heartbeat)

this is such a funny thing to receive from YOU specifically lmao tytytytytysorrytytytyyyy !!!

i used to think people were lying or being dramatic when they would say something possessed them to write something or like they shot up in the middle of the night with an idea and had to put it down but oh my fucking god this was that! i had barely woken up before i was putting some of it down so the fact that it's coherent enough to be enjoyable is nothing short of miraculous!!

#jo do be writing or whatever #if anyone wants to talk about past lives pls lmk #not that theres anything to say fr #OR if anyone wants to write the sam versionnnn or talk about the sam versionnn.... #idk if i have it in me fr. i have a sweet spot for torturing steve idk if i can do it to my son