#the curls are everything

[inkskinned]

the thing about art is that it was always supposed to be about us, about the human-ness of us, the impossible and beautiful reality that we (for centuries) have stood still, transfixed by music. that we can close our eyes and cry about the same book passage; the events of which aren't real and never happened. theatre in shakespeare's time was as real as it is now; we all laugh at the same cue (pursued by bear), separated hundreds of years apart.

three years ago my housemates were jamming outdoors, just messing around with their instruments, mostly just making noise. our neighbors - shy, cautious, a little sheepish - sat down and started playing. i don't really know how it happened; i was somehow in charge of dancing, barefoot and laughing - but i looked up, and our yard was full of people. kids stacked on the shoulders of parents. old couples holding hands. someone had brought sidewalk chalk; our front walk became a riot of color. someone ran in with a flute and played the most astounding solo i've ever heard in my life, upright and wiggling, skipping as she did so. she only paused because the violin player was kicking his heels up and she was laughing too hard to continue.

two weeks ago my friend and i met in the basement of her apartment complex so she could work out a piece of choreography. we have a language barrier - i'm not as good at ASL as i'd like to be (i'm still learning!) so we communicate mostly through the notes app and this strange secret language of dancers - we have the same movement vocabulary. the two of us cracking jokes at each other, giggling. there were kids in the basement too, who had been playing soccer until we took up the far corner of the room. one by one they made their slow way over like feral cats - they laid down, belly-flat against the floor, just watching. my friend and i were not in tutus - we were in slouchy shirts and leggings and socks. nothing fancy. but when i asked the kids would you like to dance too? they were immediately on their feet and spinning. i love when people dance with abandon, the wild and leggy fervor of childhood. i think it is gorgeous.

their adults showed up eventually, and a few of them said hey, let's not bother the nice ladies. but they weren't bothering us, they were just having fun - so. a few of the adults started dancing awkwardly along, and then most of the adults. someone brought down a better sound system. someone opened a watermelon and started handing out slices. it was 8 PM on a tuesday and nothing about that day was particularly special; we might as well party.

one time i hosted a free "paint along party" and about 20 adults worked quietly while i taught them how to paint nessie. one time i taught community dance classes and so many people showed up we had to move the whole thing outside. we used chairs and coatracks to balance. one time i showed up to a random band playing in a random location, and the whole thing got packed so quickly we had to open every door and window in the place.

i don't think i can tell you how much people want to be making art and engaging with art. they want to, desperately. so many people would be stunning artists, but they are lied to and told from a very young age that art only matters if it is planned, purposeful, beautiful. that if you have an idea, you need to be able to express it perfectly. this is not true. you don't get only 1 chance to communicate. you can spend a lifetime trying to display exactly 1 thing you can never quite language. you can just express the "!!??!!!"-ing-ness of being alive; that is something none of us really have a full grasp on creating. and even when we can't make what we want - god, it feels fucking good to try. and even just enjoying other artists - art inherently rewards the act of participating.

i wasn't raised wealthy. whenever i make a post about art, someone inevitably says something along the lines of well some of us aren't that lucky. i am not lucky; i am dedicated. i have a chronic condition, my hands are constantly in pain. i am not neurotypical, nor was i raised safe. i worked 5-7 jobs while some of these memories happened. i chose art because it mattered to me more than anything on this fucking planet - i would work 80 hours a week just so i could afford to write in 3 of them.

and i am still telling you - if you are called to make art, you are called to the part of you that is human. you do not have to be good at it. you do not have to have enormous amounts of privilege. you can just... give yourself permission. you can just say i'm going to make something now and then - go out and make it. raquel it won't be good though that is okay, i don't make good things every time either. besides. who decides what good even is?

you weren't called to make something because you wanted it to be good, you were called to make something because it is a basic instinct. you were taught to judge its worth and over-value perfection. you are doing something impossible. a god's ability: from nothing springs creation.

a few months ago i found a piece of sidewalk chalk and started drawing. within an hour i had somehow collected a small classroom of young children. their adults often brought their own chalk. i looked up and about fifteen families had joined me from around the block. we drew scrangly unicorns and messed up flowers and one girl asked me to draw charizard. i am not good at drawing. i basically drew an orb with wings. you would have thought i drew her the mona lisa. she dragged her mother over and pointed and said look! look what she drew for me and, in the moment, i admit i flinched (sorry, i don't -). but the mother just grinned at me. he's beautiful. and then she sat down and started drawing.

someone took a picture of it. it was in the local newspaper. the summary underneath said joyful and spontaneous artwork from local artists springs up in public gallery. in the picture, a little girl covered in chalk dust has her head thrown back, delighted. laughing.

#writeblr #warm up #this is longer than i wanted i really considered removing that part about myself and what i went thru #but i think it really fucking bothers me that EVERY time i talk about being an artist #ppl assume i just like. had the skill and ability to drop everything and pay for grad school. #like sir i grew up poor. my house wasn't a safe space. i gave up a FREE RIDE TO LAW SCHOOL. for THIS. bc i chose it. #was it fucking hard? was i choosing the hard thing?? yes. #but we need to stop seeing artists as lazy layabouts that can ''afford'' to just ''sit around and create'' #when MANY - if not MOST - of us are NOT like that. we have to work our fucking ASSES off. hard work. long and hard work #part of valuing artists is recognizing the amount we sacrifice to make our art. bc it doesn't just #like HAPPEN to us. also btw it rarely has anything to do with true talent. #speaking as someone with a chronic condition i hate when ppl are like u have it easy. like actively as i'm writing this my hands r #ACTIVELY hurting me. i haven't been posting bc my left hand was curled in a claw for the last week #this isn't fucking luck. after a certain point it's not even TALENT. it's dedication & sacrifice. #''u get to flounce around and do nothing with ur life'' is a narrative that is a direct result of capitalism #imagine if we said that about literally any other profession. #''oh so u give up 10 yrs of ur life to be a doctor? u sacrifice having a social life and u get SUPER in debt? #u need to work countless hours and it will often be thankless? well i wish i was that lucky'' #we should be applying that logic to landlords ONLY #''oh ur mom and dad gave u the money to buy a house? and all u did was paint it white and rent it? huh.''

[itscherryterry-again]

it's you!

I don't know bingbong, let's ask the destroyed roomba

#bonnet binghe im OBSESSED WITH YOUUUUUU #his hair is messy in the first but i tried to convey it more straight than usual.... #so that when he transmigrates sy tries to revive his curls </3333333 he buys a diffuser and everythinf #god im unwell. sick and twisted. #binggeyuan #luo binghe #luo bingge #shen yuan #scum villian self saving system #svsss #the trend already died but im late to everything so its fine

[starrystevie]

hurt/comfort | mentions of anxiety and trauma | crossposted to twitter

"what's that?" eddie murmurs into the quiet darkness of their bedroom.

dread piles into steve's stomach. he wants to tug his sleeve over his hands so eddie can't see the writing on his palm anymore. wants to hide the pen marks by holding onto his hips instead.

"it's nothing," he whispers back, attaching his lips to the underside of eddie's jaw. he knows his boyfriend melts at the kisses he puts there. knows it will distract him from asking any more prying questions.

the ink is smudged, hardly legible anymore after a day at work. between washing his hands and shuffling papers and rubbing subconsciously at his palm when that certain type of anxiety knots into his gut, the pen marks from earlier are halfway to disappearing until he starts it all over again the next morning.

steve can't help it. he thought that moving in with eddie, having his support, would make it easier to cope with it all. thought that having someone else to help hold him accountable was the answer.

yet here he is, writing a list on his hand every morning, just to help him remember simple things.

he turns on the coffee pot in the morning, makes a note of it on his palm, crosses it out when he turns the pot off and tells himself over and over that it's actually off and he's not imagining it.

he locks the door and writes "LOCKED" in all caps so he doesn't come home halfway through the day to check and make sure it's actually locked.

he brushes his teeth, he feeds the dog, he puts his wallet in his briefcase, he closes the refrigerator door after breakfast and writes reminder after reminder on his palm in sticky black ink.

it helps, really it does, when steve's mind starts to wander in a boring meeting and he gets that hot rush of guilt of forgetting something burning through his veins. he'll look at his hand under the table and scan over the notes, find what's looking for, and try to breathe.

he'll read it over and over, the crossed out "coffee pot" or the "wallet in bag" or the "fed duke", until he feels like it sinks in, blinking back into real time to focus.

it's some strange mix of anxiety and lack of control and head trauma, robin thinks.

steve can't talk to a lot of people about it, embarrassed that he can't remember doing simple fucking tasks, but robin gets it. gets him. robin lets him swing his legs into her lap and pulls his hand up to her face so she can inspect the notes from the day to piece them all together.

it was her idea in the first place to write on his hand. she had suggested paper first but that was too easy to lose especially if he couldn't remember setting it down. she traces over the ink and lets him vent about feeling like a failure or stupid or some type of broken, reminding him gently that none of them got out hawkins without scars.

but steve hasn't let eddie see that yet, too afraid of breaking whatever they've made together, too afraid of scaring him off with his cracked brain and clenched jaw. too afraid of being built so wrong that he'll look like a once shiny penny covered in rust-colored problems.

so he digs his fingers into his palm, nails slicing into flesh & ink, and presses his lips fiercely into eddie's jaw to stop him from spilling any secrets. lets his tongue sneak out as an apology for not showing him his jagged edges. lets his teeth bite against the words he wants to say.

"baby," eddie whispers, his gentle callused hands trailing over steve's arms to settle on his clenched fist. he shakes his head against eddie's chin, bites at his neck again, ignores the way the love of his fucking life is trying to peel his fingers open to see it. see him.

steve feels raw, a live wire, one second away from snapping into sparks of electricity. he shakes his hand free and curls it around the small of eddie's back, tugging him closer, hiding his shame.

"it's nothing," he repeats, voice shaky and rough against eddie's skin.

if he just slots his leg right, if he just presses into eddie right, if he just tips his head and rolls his hips and plays his cards right, he can avoid all of this all together. he can take eddie's mind away from the writing on his hand and convince them both everything is okay.

but it's not that easy, it never is, because there fingers wrapping around his wrist at an awkward angle to pull his hand back and heat flares up in his cheeks. eddie's going to see, going to ask, going to figure out that steve is broken beyond repair and it's all thanks to one too many blows to the head & one too many times of fucking up & one too many times of leaving the goddamn door unlocked.

"i just-" he bites out, trying and failing to pull his arm out from eddie's grasp. maybe some part of him wants to come clean and get the inevitable over and done with. "-they're just some notes okay?"

and now eddie's looking between him and his palm with those eyes that hold love and the pity that he hates, so he blinks away, jolts to get his arm free again. he doesn't want pity, he doesn't want puppy dog eyes, he doesn't want the reminder that he can't-

but then there's lips pressing oh so gently to the hand he rubbed raw earlier when he could have sworn he didn't triple check that he paid the water bill. there's the flutter of eyelashes against his fingertips as eddie trails kisses over the thing that makes him feel less than.

steve doesn't fight to pull his arm back anymore. his shoulders drop, his muscles relax, and that ball of dread in the pit of his stomach eases away into something that feels more like acceptance.

"that's smart," eddie mutters against his palm. "to help you remember?"

and just like that, it isn't secret anymore. just like that eddie's peeled back the layers of bravado and nonchalance and seen steve for the mess he is.

he kisses the notes like it's the easiest thing to do and maybe for eddie it is. maybe taking a piece of steve's hurt is what they found each other for. maybe eddie was made to understand every inch of steve from the inside out like the way a vine instinctually knows to follow the sun.

steve resettles his face in eddie's neck, nods and breathes him in so he has him deep in his lungs. "it was robin's idea."

"she's smart too, then." eddie hums and drops steve's hand gently, letting it wind back around him so he can tangle his in steve's hair. "does it help?"

"yep," steve mumbles.

"how have i never noticed you scribbling on your hand everyday?" eddie asks with his lips pressed into the crown of steve's head.

"i didn't want you to see. i'm pretty good at hiding."

he can feel when eddie takes in a deep breath. feel when his chest expands and collapses before whispering "start adding 'eddie loves me' on there."

steve shakes his head with a small grin, his heart beat slowing from an anxious jack-rabbiting speed to something more eddie paced. "i never need a reminder of that one."

#this headcanon is brought to you by my own head trauma and anxiety causing me to forget literally everything!!! #zoom in on the 4 photos i took of my curling iron this morning to prove it was off #steddie #my writing #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie drabble #steddie ficlet #steddie hurt/comfort

[walnutmistjamie]

That's the Roy Kent effect.

#tedlassogif #jamie tartt #roy kent #roy x jamie #royjamie #ted lasso #*mine: gifs #the superman curl is everything to me #he is so cute

[moonstruckdraws]

Let’s see what’s been going on..

A lot.  The answer is a lot..

I just feel like he’d replay all of these constantly when alone even though it was their painful moments.  But he would watch them because they’re the most recent footage of them, you know? I was speechless with @somerandomdudelmao update as always. Felt a bit better at the almost instant second post (the angst still burns in me) so I thought to draw something :] Plus this is a great excuse for me to finally start drawing stuff of their series!  Love it with all my heart.  I am excited for the future fluff, but all here for the angst.  I’m not prepared.

#cass apocalypse series #cass fanart tag #future donnie #sorry not really sorry #him curling in on himself broke me #he'll fix everything it's fine

[fishtrouts]

Enamel pins

I'm about to start designing 2 enamel pins (as a pack) and would very much like to hear what you'd like to see. Swordfish and Hopper? The red and green bread dragons? Or perhaps a frog and a crow? Please let me know your thoughts!

#i'm indecisive because everything sounds appealing #enamel pins of the bread dragons curled up.. #or a crow with a golden coin paired with a toad with a golden crown #so i humbly request your opinions

[strangerhands]

he is too beautiful...

#oscar isaac #pls... #will dempsey #pls #life itself #him #hes so gorgeous #i want to kiss #his face #. #his eyes his eyebrows his eyelashes his lips his nose his ears his freckles his stubble his curls his skin his face his voice his talent his #everything #talkin shit #this clip is also a little funny to me tbh

[onaperduamedee]

Your body no longer feels like your own.

#the wheel of time #wot on prime #wot show spoilers #moiraine damodred #wot edit #wot s2 spoilers #mygifs #mine: wot #you're a cool one #I have a backlog I know #I retract what I said about the gateway opening channeling #this was the bookend to the season opening for her #the contrast between Moiraine curled up in the water #the perfectly still water #her hands moving like slab of stone not belonging to her anymore #her palm breaking the surface with barely a gesture because everything is so narrow now #and Moiraine in the finale lost in this beautiful dance #hands alive #the waves disrupted by her weaves so powerful they break the surface like sea creatures racing underwater #the vastness of the shore #the open air #THIS SHOW

[bettertwin1]

Nothing more humbling than trying to pull the blanket up and punching yourself square in the jaw instead.

#everything moves in slow motion when it happens #the moment you realize #fuck i messed up #and then everything speeds up and now you're curled up on the bed in pain #and the reason you couldn't pull the blanket up was because you have the blanket #tucked under your legs #i'm my own worst enemy #rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt leo #rise leo #unpause rise of the tmnt #rise of the tmnt #rise donnie #rottmnt donnie #disaster twins #leo rottmnt

[bluerosefox]

Of Godsons, Fruitloops, and Lois 'I will drag all secrets out into the sun' Lane

Danny loses his parents due to their own lack of safety in the lab (death? Coma? People finally putting their foot down about the Fenton's endangering their kids? Idk pick). Jazz can't take him in due to being in college and living on its campus (and he didnt want to force her into an apartment just to keep him, he saw the prices and knows she'll have to work to make rent) and Danny fears the only place he can go to is... Vlad. (Sam's parents would never let him live with her and Tucker's place doesn't have the room)

Vlad's been lording it over Danny, smug about it all, after all he IS Danny's godfather and he has the space and money to provide for the boy in his time of need.

Only, when digging into Danny's files, his social worker discovers Vlad isn't Danny's godfather, he was meant to be but the Fenton's forgot to send/sign in the final paperwork (even if those documents were the only contact they had with Vlad over the years before the reunion)

No Danny's godparent, the person to take him should anything happen to the Fenton's is....

Lois Lane.

His mom's childhood friend.

#danny phantom #danny fenton #blue rambles #crossover #writing ideas #random idea #danny phantom dc #dpxdc #Lois gets a call about her godson who she hasnt really seen since he was a toddler #both she and Maddie had gotten busy with their lives and careers but did still talk at time #she does still send things and have talked with Danny over the phone though #though last time they spoke was before his accident #when she see's him alarm bells start ringing #Danny just got out of a fight with Skulker and is kinda curling in on himself as Vlad is towering over him and threatening him #Vlad is trying to use Lois as a 'Tell her you wish to stay with me and I wont have to harm her' threat against Danny #ooooh what if Clark was with her #and hears EVERYTHING Vlad's been saying #normally i do the bats but hey I wanna switch it up a bit #Lois has a new rich target to sic her investigate journalism on #'hmmm yes EXACTLY how did you get so rich so fast again Mr. Masters?'

[xbuster]

#shin seiki evangelion #neon genesis evangelion #the end of evangelion #maya ibuki #ritsuko akagi #maya is everything #the way she curls into 'ritsuko's' hug was so cute

[fiapartridge]

this one’s doing something to me

#luke hughes #riding in his first adult purchase #his curls #his hands #everything about this is screaming babygirl #OMG BABYS NO LONGER A ROOKIE

[anguishmacgyver]

#that migraine aesthetic #stargate sg1 4x13 #daniel jackson #whump #whumpedit #aftermath #currently obsessed 1. with how he's curled into a ball #2. pulls his own hair to overcome the waves of pain?? #everything basically

[isevery0nehereverystoned]

I revised these tarot cards from my major arcana

#can we rest now Buffy #can we rest #dusk tarot #dusk rising #btvs #spuffy #buffy the vampire slayer #spuffy feelings i can't get rid of #mine #fanart #spuffy feelings i can't get rid of #buffy #hold him like a baby #hold me like a very destructive baby that will not fall asleep #curl me up inside you and let me hear you through the heat #bastardized Suzanne Vega #I’m old #tired #and I have nothing to offer but everything to consume

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

the most Dog ever. or. dog shaped Thing ever

#four different versions bc i couldnt decide #i have been watching So Many jimmy dean & rowlf clips its not even funny #well. it is funny. its really funny. theyre hilarious #wellll. rowlf is hilarious. jimmy dean is funny as well due to Proximity #rowlf is the best muppet no one can convince me otherwise #hes Everything #scribble garnish #the muppets #rowlf the dog #rowlf #did i make him too curly? maybe. but hey who's gonna hold me accountable No One thats who #you'll never catch me alive! i'll curly-fy... curlify.... curl... ILL MAKE EVERYTHING CURLY MARK MY WORDS #no seriously. mark em. take out your notebook and write this down there'll be a test later #anyway i love how Blanket he is #every time i see a picture of his full puppet its like. thats a blanket right there #puppy throw... #you know that would be a good blanket idea actually? head and arms and the rest is just a pelt #rowlf skin for your floor!

[the-greatest-magic-of-all]

A Boy and His Fire Dog 🔥

I was working on a FH comic this morning and while I was finalizing the Hangman's Hellhound design I was struck with the feels over the thought of him and Fabian having similar eye scarring.

#fabian seacaster #fantasy high #dimension 20 #the hangman #fabian aramais seacaster #I literally curled up into a ball at the sweetness of it and dropped everything to draw this #the comic should be done soon though! #I hope you guys will like it #it's gonna be able to be printed and foldable like a zine!