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hamsamwich23 · 2 years

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10 facts: unreality Mortimer and Scout :3

Hell yes bestie let's go! Two of my favorite little creatures

Random facts that are mostly not lore relevant! Who knows

Tw: mentioned/implied past animal death, mentions of death.

Proshits and k1nk/fetish blogs DNI you'll be blocked and reported

Unreality Mortimer

His voice is probably a little different from canon Mortimers. Less raspy. However when he gets upset his voice tends to sound distorted or even "glitchy"

Sometimes stray cats will follow him home, so now mortimer just occasionally sets food out for those cats and let's them live in the woods. (He had a cat once, but ... An accident happened)

He is very fixated on shows like Bojack Horseman and Moral Orel and will gladly go into rants about them

His favorite music artist is Jack Stauber

He also has a collection of pillows he sleeps with. He hoards them

He has set water on fire before (age 1, Nick dared him to do it)

He's stupidly ticklish

He sucks at fighting based video games (still plays them regardless), but he enjoys playing animal crossing or stuff like harvest moon. He can maybe play Deltarune

He's terrified of spiders

The reason he's one of the most feared beings in this au is because of his judgment powers, but more so what happens if you are judged guilty of a death-worthy crime or action. The punishment being equal karma to what they did. The punishments are not judged by religion, simply morality, karma, action and intention

Unreality Scout:

They're gender fluid and use he/she/they pronouns

They also use their hair for expressing themselves, they know how to make it appear shorter without cutting it (using hair ties and/or hair clips)

They're also really good with makeup and occasionally helps do others makeup for them

She's very good at art, she was taught by nick herself. She has notebooks full of old doodles and artwork

She's also really good with video games and even has a youtube channel where she streams herself playing them, majority of the time it's horror games(its doing good so far)

They have inherited the dark magic curse (from the book), they ended up repressing it for years though, so now they're learning how to actually use it. (I imagine that when they're using it it looks Something like.. THISSS. Parts of their body glow purple when using dark magic. One of those being the entire hands and arms

7: they love animals in general

8:she can cook however she adds extra of certain ingredients to food she makes for herself. She makes the weirdest food combinations

9:She's also really into fashion but stays on the more, SOMEWHAT simpler side. She's a fan of the grunge style

10: she can and will bite you, affectionately if you're a friend, family or Twenty. If not? Well. Sayonara to your arm then

Obviously I ran out of ideas/hj/lh

ANYWAYS HERE YA GO!!!

#I like how none of the mort headcanons are important exactly #except the last one #then im just like #oh yeah man this is why #this is why bad people fear him #hes a silly scary little guy #he probably would bite you #hello puppets #hello puppets midnightshow #unreality mortimer #unreality scout #unreality au #Unreality scout is another fav #shes so funky

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koobiie · 1 month

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shoutout to everyone who wants to infodump but cant string together coherent thoughts to form sentences and instead just look at you like this

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malwarechips · 2 months

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yknow i never noticed the sheer rareness of images having ids or alt text on this website until i started adding alt text to my art (and trying to remember to add it to any images i post in general, especially text screenshots) and that makes me kinda sad

#i used to be pretty intimidated by the idea of having to describe my art but. it isnt as hard as it sounds #i just treat it like im describing an image i dont have at the time really #plus ive been told that even a simple id is better than no id #lev.txt

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butchfalin · 7 months

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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

#yeehaw #1k #5k #10k #posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference #edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense #also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags #1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now #he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic #2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign #like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock #3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing #it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is #extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once #it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life #i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about #Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect #if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it #aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week

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qrowpilled · 10 months

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hate when you find a character whose so infuriatingly Your Type that its embarrassing like yeahg no one is gonna be surprised when i announce this is my new Guy Of The Month

#shush jesse #EDIT from future me: this post was about astarion but im fully a galegirl (gendy neutch) now so idk what that says #he's also my type for what its worth #this post abt astarion #hes just so painfully on brand for me #i know so little about him though is the thing but i still feel insane #but i cant play the game and i dont want to watch anyone play it and i dont want spoilers #so like.....secondhand blorbo right now

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cadaverkeys · 6 months

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You guys rlly don't realise how much knowledge is still not committed to the internet. I find books all the time with stuff that is impossible to find through a search engine- most people do not put their magnum opus research online for free and the more niche a skill is the less likely you are to have people who will leak those books online. (Nevermind all the books written prior to the internet that have knowledge that is not considered "relevant" enough to digitise).

Whenever people say that we r growing up with all the world's knowledge at our fingertips...it's not necessarily true. Is the amount of knowledge online potentially infinite? Yes. Is it all knowledge? No. You will be surprised at the niche things you can discover at a local archive or library.

#rambles #if you are a person who is into delicate skills #like lacemaking or printing or sewing #you will know fair well just how non expansive the knowledge online is in comparison to written guides from like the 50s #there was a time where at least one person in the household had to know a constructive skill #but in the modern day there is just less ans less demands for comprehensive guides #library propaganda #im stuck doing an essay rn but bc i have covid i cant go to the library and its totally fucked me #i want to source a lot of the stuff i read irl but i just cant go and get it and theres no online ver

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lesbianralzarek · 4 months

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"life doesnt get better, you just get stronger" does NOT include ages 11-17. life does in fact just get better from there. those years are dogshit. like, you do get stronger but its mostly just a factor of not being 11-17 anymore. positive thinking helps but it doesnt fix whatevers going on at 15, you have to brute force through that one raw

#i originally posted this as just a 'hey remember how fuckin bad middle/highschool was? shit was wild' type post but now #there are a bunch of teens in the notes being like 'oh my god are you serious? it gets better? im not stuck in hell forever??'#and im reminded that the only people who told teenage ella 'it gets better' were speakers at mental health assemblies #aka the least relatable people alive who were seemingly born to lie to you #so. uh. yeah im a certified adult who isnt here to lie or sugarcoat the realities of being a teenager #the only thing more certain than the pain is the transcience

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erzvolnes · 21 days

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#please do rb this btw i know like 5% of you at most know my name #but even when im sure i know somebody's name i have to check to make sure #bc if i got it wrong id have to go missing #so im curious if anybody actually knows who anyone else is or if we're all just going by url

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roseforviolet · 2 months

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ot3 · 8 months

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i dont like the idea that kids these days are doing their fandom rps with ai chatbots. that's how you're supposed to make lifelong friends as a weird really online teen.

#i was never really an rper of any kind it just did not do it for me #im like im sorry actually i cant do this collaboratively i need to be controlling all of the little dolls myself.#however homestuck rp deck epicmafia. now that was another story

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tiarnanabhfainni · 3 months

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every single time israel fires on people picking up food or humanitarian aid it truly cuts me to the core. obviously it's equally horrible to fire on civilians escaping the invasion or to bomb hospitals or refugee camps or people just living in their own homes. but there's something so brutal about hitting people right when they have gathered for life-saving aid. by firing on them there the IOF have set up an impossible dilemma where starving people have to choose between death by bullet or death by hunger. they have left no room for palestinians to choose life. i do not know how my government or any other government can just sit by and watch while innocent people continue to be gunned down for the crime of existing in israel's eyeline.

#feels like a stupid post to make but im watching all this videos and i feel so much for these people just trying to eat

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viorhysealberia · 4 months

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pokemon fans when they have to wait another year for the next big game with no major releases in-between

#pokemon #I JUST LOVE HOW UNANIMOUS IT IS. ITS SO FUNNY BUT ALSO SO DIRE #like!! EVERYONE is glad we’re waiting! I haven’t seen ANYONE complain #im pokemon fans btw. please take your time gf there is NO need to rush

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crabussy · 3 months

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IM GOING TO PUNCH A HOLE IN SOMEONES CAR

#WHAT THE FUCK MAN #caps #you're not evil dont worry I love you #BUT WHAT THE FUCK. I feel like sisyphus now #if I just blow my nose again it'll be clear right. right guys. if I get the mucus out I can breathe #IM GONNA BE ILLL IM SO ANGRY

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obsob · 4 months

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i am a being capable of immeasurable love and whimsy

#and also. am a ilittlel kitty :3 #mine #cats #brain empy. felt tip cats ONLY #we were promised snow today n then they decided actually :) rain all day for u #i bought new wool for a cardigan today im SO excited its gna be so colourful #i was going to do some sort of Thing on the back like a heart or something but im still too scared to do colour changing stuff #maybe....maybe next time #i think i will try a patter w like. an actual grid with it first rather than just rawdog it #bc i . do not know what im doing :3

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azuneekun · 1 month

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did this rat just call me a dumbass in my own native language

#stardew valley #stardew #sdv #sv #stardew 1.6 #1.6 update #stardew valley 1.6 update #my art #im just kidding but it made me laugh so hard when he said that . i was like what did u say to me.

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mausolealdrift · 7 months

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its baffling seeing people on here being all shocked about how other ppl didnt have sex or do drugs or drink or go to parties etc etc in high schools like. sorry i was too busy getting bullied to do all of that stuff i guess. why are you surprised that there’s losers on the cringe loser website

#like yeah i WISHED i could do that sort of stuff #but i felt so completely isolated from everyone else at my school bc ppl were so nasty to me #its fine cos im doing all the stuff i missed out on now that im in university #but some ppl dont even get that chance #maybe its not that serious but. idk. just dont be a dick #but also ppl who didnt do that stuff acting like theyre better than ppl who did is fucking annoying and also a dick move. btw #📼

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