#things i'll never tell you

[pls-insert-25cents-to-continue]

#my photgraphy #my writing #writing #sad thoughts #depression #silence #alone with my thoughts #lonely #things i'll never tell you

[penny-for-my-thoughts-and-rants]

It’s only when you begin to lose everything

That it becomes easier to see the things that never really were good for you

Things you thought you knew

Diminish over time

Dematerializing right before your very eyes

People who you thought you could rely on

Show their true face

And suddenly your place in their life comes to light

And the enemies you thought you once had

Become friends over time

A lot of the pressure we put ourselves, though is just that

Self made and worthless

Never truly having a hold on us or our happiness

So next time you start to think someone else holds the key to your happiness

Take a step back and remember

Happiness first starts with you

-g.a

#poets on tumblr #poetry #venting space #things I’ll never tell you #heresapennyformythoughts #things i'll never tell you

[lazylittledragon]

detransition is something that should Absolutely be talked about but the idea of going into this tag terrifies me beyond belief

#ramble #things they'll never tell you about detransition: #it is Not always by choice!! a lot of the time it's for financial/social reasons #and a lot of detransitioners go on to retransition #technically i'm a detransitioner BECAUSE of terf/transmed bullshit and i'll tell the story if anyone is interested #and like. the people in the news aren't the average detransitioner #they're saying 'it wasn't right for me so therefore nobody should have it' #also trans people and detransitioners are not enemies. we don't hate eachother #idk i have a lot of thoughts and i can't articulate them but i know what i want to say

[unproduciblesmackdown]

always enjoyed the Chess Set In The Foreground perspective framing used here

now also noting like, huh, a chess set in a general store just visited by marigold competitors who killed one of their guys and are now on the way back from their rendezvous point w/suppliers

#and now to take a big sip of ''nothing suggests lackadaisy ft. people stuck / things repeating / death begetting death'' #not like i suppose we're going to be hit with ''& then mordecai and viktor sat down at the defiance field office for every passing gangster #played chess and then went and properly slaughtered the lackadaisy crew and arbogasts at the funeral home / barn w/car-sized holes'' #good reminder though that Viktor Is Now Active....left off with elsa managing to give him a phonecall; for good measure #lackadaisy #i have no lengthy Mitzi Mordecai Murder Mystery Musings posts for today (b/c not enough fresh musing insights) but no prommies #epiphanies are on their own schedule #quite the chess piece arrangement seen there too lol. can't tell if there's any Classic Configuration in the game b/w viktor & mordecai #not a chesshead and never was lol strategy games??? who's that #or i'll play them but not strategically. invented Flick Chess for indoor recess in elementary school #you flick a piece across the board and whatever you knock off the board = you took those pieces lmfao #though not like that has Zero strategy. thinking of my day enjoying tiddlywinks research #imagine my delight revisiting all this material like oh yeah the little pic of freckle tiddlywinking #let's squop; boys #i'm also supposing that chess sets? checkers sets? and etc. would be common general store features; like phone usage....real general.... #but like; what; are we expecting this Not to bring a response from marigold lol #got the nervous twitch but they're like ''ah it's fine. cost of doing business''

[queenerdloser]

i just finished dark heir

#me foaming at the mouth during the last chapters: HE IS! FUCKING! SAVING YOU! #i am huddled around will kempen hissing like a mama cat none of these fuckers are allowed to look at him #dark rise #okay but like. cyrian at literally every moment in the book you see will anticipating things and making connections #that you never make. doing things like a leader & being fucking smart and strategic. and your dumb ass really thought. #hm. must mean i shouldnt listen to him about the magic staff that can literally stop the end of the world. must be evil. #me: [screams into the abyss] #i know i cant expect characters to react like readers and they DID all react like i knew they would but god it was so infuriating!!!!! #and heart breaking! god!!!! god!!!!! will reliving his mother's initial betrayal over and over and OVER again #and thinking about all the little moments we get where the novel tells us: if these 'evil' characters had just been accepted #instead of tossed aside maybe they wouldnt have fallen. if they had been protected instead of killed maybe they would have #become protectors instead of killers. maybe if will's mom hadn't tried to butcher him for the sin of his own birth #he wouldn't have been so scared to tell people he lied to them. #anyway im not normal about will kempen and if book 3 doesnt give me his friends fucking accepting him i'll kill someone #me looking directly at visander: i dont care how charming you are i'll murder your ass about it #i read this book in like 5 hrs im being very normal about it

[cerise-on-top]

hi<3 if you can, can you do valeria and laswell with a gothic s/o? like someone who likes darker/morbid things and things like that! love your blog by the way! it’s definitely my favorite blog to come look at after a long ass day <333

Hey there! Sorry, but I couldn't really find too much on what counts as dark and morbid in the goth scene, so I wrote more general HCs, I hope that's alright still ^^;

Valeria and Laswell with a Gothic!S/O

Valeria: She’d most definitely be intrigued, but not too much. In all honesty, she doesn’t know too much about the subculture, she’s never really met a goth who was clearly one. However, if it makes you happy, that’s all that matters to her. While she won’t really know too many bands, or any at all, she’d be more than happy to listen to a few if you want her to. Yes, she won’t always have the time, but when she isn’t too busy she could put on some songs by Joy Division or The Cure, she really doesn’t mind. She can vibe to that sort of music, even if it isn’t her favorite. You’re more than welcome to discuss the literature with her, though. She’s probably never read a single gothic literature book, but she can buy you some. Anything from poetry to a regular novel, it’s quite alright. While she won’t be the best person to go to when it comes to discussing those, she’ll support you either way. However, something she could definitely enjoy would be going clothes shopping with you. The fashion is kind of nice, she has to admit, so she’d be more than happy to buy you whatever garments you desire. Will go out of her way to find something you might like as well. I can’t see her being too much into the history of goth culture, though. It’s nice that you are a goth, if you want to tell her about it, then you can and she’ll listen to you, but she likely doesn’t have the time to research everything by herself. Tell her about its roots and she can definitely appreciate you going against what’s mainstream and how it all came to be. She’s a very defiant and rebellious woman herself, so she definitely gets it.

Laswell: She knows so many people, I wouldn’t be surprised if she has worked with goths before. And even if she hasn’t directly, she’s likely seen quite a few walking around the city. She usually grows worried for them in summer since their attire is black, which makes it quite hot. However, she’d be very intrigued by you and your subculture. It’s something very near and dear to you, so she would put in the effort to learn about your history. Will give some classic bands a listen as well. She just really wants to have something to talk about with you. Besides, she gets to learn more about you. While she may not be the biggest fan of your interest in death, considering she’s surrounded by it more often than not, she’d be more than happy to indulge anything else it has to offer. Laswell spent a good chunk of life left alone with her thoughts, so she definitely knows a thing or two about melancholy, the state of the world and introspection. Maybe not in the same way you do, but she can definitely keep up in a conversation. She’s likely also unintentionally read some of the more popular gothic novels out there and liked them, so she’d make for a good discussion partner as well. While she doesn’t particularly understand the need to make your face completely white, she doesn’t mind. In fact, she thinks it looks quite cool, even if it’s not for her. However, the fashion in and of itself looks really good to her. Again, she wouldn’t want to wear it, but something about Victorian and Edwardian fashion has a certain something to it that she can’t quite place. Like Valeria, she’ll definitely buy you things she thinks you might like. Anything from a suit or a corset to a book about poetry. Beware, though, she will read the books before you can.

#cod #cod x reader #valeria garza #valeria garza x reader #kate laswell #kate laswell x reader #I am so incredibly tired so I'm sorry if this is bad #the day I'm writing this is Monday and I worked for nine hours today which wasn't very fun #I'll be working for nine hours tomorrow again and I'm not looking forward to that but I need that overtime #I've never met a goth before so I don't even know anyone I could ask about it #I know an emo or two but that's not the same #still I gave the music a listen and I gotta say it sounds pretty good #I can see Valeria indulging you in your morbid things though. if you collect animal bones she can definitely acquire some #whether it be through roadkill or ethically killed animals #Laswell wouldn't be too big of a fan of having bones at home but she won't stop you either #she'll just tell you to keep them somewhere she won't necessarily have to see them all the time #she's not squeamish but she prefers to not think about death too much outside of work. she gets enough of it on the daily #Laswell would be more media literate than Valeria though. she's definitely analyzed some poems for fun when she was younger #Valeria doesn't have the time to read too much into something. or read a book at all. a poem maybe but that's it she won't read into it

[angeart]

feeding you guys this sketch

#ange draws #spontaneous grumbo drawing #well it was kinda a bribe #shh #maybe i'll polish it maybe it'll stay a sketch #i'll see #too many things to draw #but look #LOOK #they're happy #please tell me you love grian's expression #i love grian's expression #i never draw things in one layer but i completely winged this one

[linktoo]

I just watched a whole Hyundai commercial for more spider-verse animation but I'm so obsessed with the fact that they got Gwen and Miles' voice actors to stiffly promote an electric car

#across the spider verse #atsv #into the spider verse #miles morales #gwen stacey #itsv #Linktoo rambles #they made this awkward corporate behind the scenes video too about their collab i'll put it in the replies #can you at least tell me what the song is SURE thing Spider-Man the all electric Hyundai ioniq five and six electricify the spider verse #gwen coldly calling miles “spider-man” is the craziest shit I've ever heard #as good as the animation is for a car commercial I find miles looks weirdly off model and a lot of the movements don't feel 'weighty' enoug #he kinda floats from place to place and it never really sells that he's swinging around or landing on a solid surface. same for gwens arm #also the way gwen blurts out 'sure thing spiderman' and cuts off miles like the rhythm is ALL WRONG

[aro-culture-is]

Not an Aro-culture-is thing but I do have a question you might be able to answer? Is there an aromantic/asexual term for this: AroAce but if I wasn’t I would be gay? It might just be homoplatonic or homoaesthetic but idk if there was a term for it that relates to being AroAce. Thanks! <3

possibly you might vibe with oriented aroace labels, like gay aroace? i'll put this out there for other folks to consider as well, but I feel like oriented terminology sounds the most applicable from my POV.

#und3rw0r1d-unkn0wn #not aro culture #aro #aromantic #actually aro #actually aromantic #ask #mod axel #sorry we've vanished. we are Fuckin Unwell physically + emotionally tbh #also if the medical industry + the medical insurance industry could Please consider working that would be great #also if canada could pls not be on fire. don't have the spoons to research what's going on but i suspect there's the usual human fuckery #the air quality here is miserable for an area that doesn't really tend to get wildfires #(though fun fact! my fuckin grandpa almost managed to start one by having angry-style dementia and insisting it was fine that he burned log #and then dumped the ashes literally into some fuckin forest undergrowth WITHOUT TELLING PPL until it started smoking the next day. #the area was under a burn ordinance [aka burning shit is illegal due to fire risk]) #fun fact: you are not immune to thinking it will never happen to *you* in what is truly a game of chance #yes you might be *more cautious* than the average person. means fuck all when the conditions are perfect for any small thing to cause #big shit #... yeah i'll leave that as a tag for me to be confused by later

[tianhai03]

guys wake up new C coloring pic just dropped <333 have some teefs i drew awhile ago that i probably never posted here

#this was a banger drawing and C made it so much cooler with the paint splatter ty for the addition #also it makes me happy to hear you like how i draw nero bc. i dont know how to draw him actually ahsdghkajd hes very hard to draw #anyway. sparda chompers supremacy. these boys have sharp teeth and they WILL bite someone with them #devil may cry #dante(dmc) #vergil(dmc) #nero(dmc) #fan's colorings #everything from here on out is directed at C bc i have no other ways to talk to them so you guys can stop reading here <3 #hey C! i actually didnt see what your first submission was bc i didnt even receive it lmao #but i just want to say that you dont have to worry about anything; what i said the other day wasnt directed at you at all #i do enjoy the little stories you have whenever your submit things; they seem to be pretty personal stories and i appreciate that you trust #me enough to tell me about them. #if you'd feel better not sharing any more that's fine! i'm never going to mention anything in them anywhere regardless #i'll just keep posting your colorings as usual for everyone to see and appreciate :) #hope you have a great day C! and thanks again for always coloring my stuff! #allyart

[pls-insert-25cents-to-continue]

I'm so tired

#my writing #writing #sad thoughts #sad poetry #sorry for being depressing #it's been a long week #depression #someday somewhere it will get better #but for now #things i'll never say #things i'll never tell you

[chipistrate]

People really need to give Steel Wool a break sometimes, man- They messed up with Security Breach and now people act like EVERYTHING wrong with modern fnaf is all exclusively their fault when it's really not.

#Chip Chatter #especially when the issue literally WASN'T ATTACHED TO THEM AT ALL!!! #People really just say shit I stg #there's probably one person who'll think this is about one particular post #this post is a culmination of things #the twitter bs going on right now about modern lore and some people pinning all the blame on steel wool even though they don't write the #lore. A conversation I had yesterday with some people where one person kept blaming and shitting on SWS for the smallest of things #The fact that any time I try to talk about a small issue with modern fnaf in any fucking way I'll have people tell me shit like #“it's steel wool what were you expecting” regardless of if the problem was even their fault #and just generally people giving Steel Wool so much shit and most of the time it being over fucking nothing #Like I GET that Steel Wool fumbled with Security Breach oh my fucking god that was almost 2 years ago can we MOVE ON!!!! #They're improving!!! They fumbled one game and a lot of the factors involved weren't their fault anyways!!! Can we give them a fucking #break and just move on with the rest of the series already!!! I'm so sick of hearing people complain about SB when it's been almost 2 years #and Steel Wool is showing nothing but signs of improvement #Cough uhm anyways #of course you can criticize Steel Wool and I'm not saying they've never done anything wrong ever #just don't needlessly shit on them especially if the problem was out of their hands. #Rant over I'm going to bed

[dootznbootz]

Odypen definitely and equivalently adore each other BUT I weirdly can't see them as the type to actually say "I Love you".

They still definitely vocalize their love for each other but it's more so in "My Joy", and "Extraordinary Woman", "Strange Woman/Man", etc. And very cheesy lines (both say some cheesy shit in the Odyssey, and he definitely does in the Iliad as well. "Joy like a drowning sailor seeing land" bit???)

I could see "I adore you" but even then, that's probably during very specific moments but the actual "I love you"??? I just typed it just now for fic shit and... It weirdly just didn't feel right and I don't know why. 😅

Idk maybe it's kind of because I see them as over the top in ways, they love wordplay and riddles and I think they'd almost think "...That's not good enough >:( " about it??? I don't know???😂

#I wrote this last night. I'll do the asks I got later. don't worry! :D #I am the cheese god remember?😅 #I think these two would try to “out-cheese” each other and whoever is left speechless first loses #“I would forget my own name before I would ever forget you” bullshit. CHEESY #And yes. “I sleep in our nest with you or outside on the dirt” stupidity >:D #I plan for Odysseus as a beggar to ask why she waits so long. As he's been gone a longer amount of time than the time they had together #(Simply asking as reassurance. He knows his answer. Calypso asked him. but what about Penelope?) but she gets mad at the #“Beggar” and pities him as he must be telling the truth about having a miserable life if he never got the chance to know such devotion #How what they have could never be sullied by #something as trivial as distance and years. How the years with him were the best in her life. Only made better by their son. #'My dear Joy made songs and poems about love a reality as that was simply the life we shared. Even separated our 'song' will always echo #no matter how long it's been. I'LL make sure it always does. And I know he's doing the same... That strange man used to say that #even if he died his corpse would drag itself back to us before he'd ever give up.' #...I'm not one for 'odyssey zombie au' but when I first heard it yeah. :'D Came up with this back then #“His eyes as hard as flint or horn-” Bullshit! The sad lil fuck is hiding sobs with coughs and telling her to keep away for fear of her #catching whatever “illness” he has. The nice thing about being disguised as old means sickly old man works. #... #I'm noticing that Odysseus has a lot of silly oneliners while I write Penelope with a shit ton of set up :'D #They are so silly and I love them so much #...I wrote a lot :'D #Mad rambles #shot by odysseus #my headcanons #odypen #yahoo!!! #sometimes I wonder if I should tag this with more things but I don't want to taint the regular tags with my bullshit :'D I KNOW I'm insane

[basofy]

god this was so cringey shut up all you've ever seen regarding women has been a smelly rat in the mirror and distorted photoshopped images of women with big boobees you know nothing

#first of all #spoilers #lisa spoilers #sorry for bullying buddy in this fine afternoon i know it's not her fault but i was thinking about this in the kitchen and laughing #but it feels so out of place cuz buddy's relationship with her gender is nowhere near positive she doesnt even know what gender is #she has the same concept of gender and sex as a cat where it's merely reproductive #all she knows is she is different from everyone cuz of her body #she has never talked to another woman in her life she doesnt know history of feminism #and i doubt so much that anyone told her about it when most people were just thinking about her womb #i think the concept of buddy familiarizing with her gender is AWESOME but we never see this happen we dont see the process #imagine if she said this before saying any opinion #as a woman...i can tell you milk goes before the cereal #god feminism is crumbling #why dont you say something you actually know about like #as an abuse victim. or anything that sounds more casual #which is another thing you can relate to lisa with if you care #(idk if she actually knew lisa's lore or was just messing with buzzo lmaoo) #lisa rpg #also as an additional i like nonbinary buddy...she is just buddy #put buddy in a conversation with queen roger and maybe i'll take this line seriously #lisa ramblings

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

if dorian didn't show up, do you think louis would have shot minnie?

I do. I know some people think either he wouldn't have or he would've missed so that's why the writers had him shoot Dorian instead, but mmmmmm no, I don't personally think so. I like to think that if he had taken the shot, his shaky hands would've caused him to shoot her fatally.

Mostly because I'm already so normal about the fact that of the Ericson crew, Marlon and Louis are the only ones with a body count. Well, that we know of, but shown to us in the game, at least. Plus, we know it's Louis' first kill.

Like yeah, Clementine and AJ become part of the crew and they have bigger body counts, and if we're counting indirect kills caused by actions, then Tenn has a count... and I guess everyone has blood on their hands for blowing up the boat... but I'm talking about killed directly with a weapon like....... I lied, I'm not normal about that at all, Louis and Marlon are the ones who have killed someone in Louis' route. I'm also not normal about the fact that Louis kills Dorian and then even as he's clearly in shock, he tries to go with Clementine to get AJ, and then later on when they talk about it, he says it feels like bile but not quite and he's glad he has it in him to do it.... listen, listen, listen... I'm obsessed with that.

Anyway, so if Louis shot Minerva, I think he would've accidentally killed her and can you imagine? He's already enough of a mess after killing the woman who pinned him down and tried to cut his finger off [or succeeded] but he knew Minerva, they were friends before the twins were taken. Even Violet couldn't kill her even though that would've been the smarter thing to do, and we know thanks to meta knowledge that killing her would've saved lives, but Violet couldn't, and I don't think Louis would intentionally either.

Speaking of Violet, if Louis killed Minerva, I hate to think about what that would've done to Vi. I think she might've actually left at that point, like what was planned before it got changed to her being burned. I don't think she would've attacked Louis over it, though, like yeah she attacked Clementine in the cell but Louis? I don't know, but I don't think so just because it's Louis and he'd be a mess about it anyway.

Though if he did kill her, it would be a neat parallel to draw... y'know, because Louis forgave AJ for killing Marlon even though he was pissed and heartbroken, and Violet was annoyed with him the entire time... but could she ever forgive Louis for killing Minerva? Y'know? We already have a similar parallel with AJ shooting Tenn, but still.

If Clementine killed Minerva in that moment, though, then I could see Violet attacking her since in her eyes, Clem proved her right.

So yeah, I get why they added the Dorian kill to his route. It adds another compelling element to Louis as a character, but we also need Minerva alive for episode 4; Louis can't kill her, he can't miss, and he's not going to stay with her because we need Violet to stay on the boat and him to be on shore for all routes.

#asks #twdg louis #twdg minerva #twdg clementine #twdg violet #twdg marlon #twdg tenn #honestly whenever i see someone say louis is the boring option i'm just like '.......that's your opinion but also how can you say that??' #then again i'm sure other people look at me saying violentine just isn't for me and they say the same thing so y'know... i can't talk haha #also time is such a weird thing because i look at the entire cell scene in louis' route and like... i'm not even mad about violet anymore #like yeah i still don't believe she was brainwashed like i'm sorry y'all only believe that because kent said something about it #not because there's all this evidence toward it in game like vi being pissed at clementine makes sense she doesn't need to be brainwashed #for it to work like her being vulnerable and easily manipulated into submission makes perfect sense especially with minerva there #it's like everyone was pissed that she attacked clementine and people needed a way to excuse it so it's not violet's fault when like... #that's literally what makes it interesting like calm down it's okay if violet is pissed and scared and behaves accordingly #also my controversial opinion of the day that i'll hide here in the tags so maybe people won't find it sksksk but #I personally find the concept of vinerva and the doomed tragedy of it more compelling than anything violentine did #like i'll defend violentine and i do believe it's an important and good ship it's just not my personal favorite #anyway but then the whole thing with lilly and minerva is so good and louis screaming FUCK YOU at minerva?? amazing love it so good #i love when the soft character who never chooses violence is so pissed off that all that anger they have boils to the surface and it's raw #like... he's SO mad he's SO furious he's SOOO UPSET like he wasn't even like this when marlon died or anything like he hit his limit #and then shooting dorian through the mouth while an accident is just well done i love it and i love his reaction of mortification #and apologizing and YET he still tries to go with clementine he's trembling and can barely string together a sentence but he wants to go #he wants to help her he wants to save aj THAT is the gut reaction he has after everything that just went down #'louis isn't loyal or good for clem because of the vote' babe tell me you don't understand any nuance of louis' character without telling m #it's fine IT'S FINE you don't have to agree and i just have to remind myself that it's fine not everyone likes louis we're okay #this drives me crazy in the best way like y'know what? i love the cells scene in louis' route all of it even the stuff i used to rant about #even the stuff that used to piss me off now i'm just like 'no wait past cj was dumb she wasn't looking at it this way aaaaaaaa' sksksks #that was my tag ted talk about the cell scene thank you

[goldentigerfestival]

So. I love this. The way Yuri snickers at Flynn showing his real self. The way he, without hesitation, says "yeah" to the idea that he would die in Flynn's place.

But the most important part of this entire thing, which was changed in the dub, is how Yuri specifically jokes that Flynn is trying to abandon him, and Flynn returns and tells Don he had no intention of abandoning Yuri.

Yuri does not hear this. Flynn knows that. But Flynn uses the exact same term Yuri used earlier, as if it's his answer to Yuri and saying no, I would never abandon you.

For reference:

Personally I just... love the weight of it. How Flynn will say something about Yuri that Yuri won't hear, but he still speaks it out into existence because it's how he really feels.

Just because Yuri won't hear it doesn't mean he won't say it, and in a way that's even more powerful. He's not looking for the credit of saying it. He's not looking to be recognized for saying it. He's not only expressing how he feels about Yuri somewhere that Yuri himself will hear him.

They're just his real, honest feelings, and he'll admit them even if Yuri's not within earshot.

#GTF Vesperia Clips #Fluri #classic Vesperia dub trying to hide all the more detailed intimacy between them tbh #y'all are gonna see it even more when I get around to post the huge posts I'm doing #going through the entire game with the changes they made #and how HEAVILY most of the drastic changes pertain to Flynn and their relationship #like. there's really no reason to change these matching scenes in the dub unless they're doing it on purpose #meanwhile they're the sweetest thing in the original and I'll never get over these scenes being matching scenes #also bc like. this is so important for their dynamic going forward into arc 2 #also partly why I truly believe they'd choose each other over the world in specific contexts #but that's a story for another time LOL. for now just know Flynn has gone on record #to say he would never abandon Yuri right to Don Whitehorse's face #anyway you ever get that feeling of like. when you find out from a friend that #someone said smth nice abt you? but you didn't know they said it? #like you KNOW they're saying nice/good things abt you to other ppl now? that's the vibe I get from this #that he's not just saying it to Yuri's face. he says the important things /to others/ as well #he's not trying to score extra brownie points by using sweet words where he knows Yuri will hear him #to me that's the most honest form of affection. saying your feelings out loud where they won't hear you #Flynn also proved himself before saying it as if the idea was to show not just tell #I think Yuri understands when not joking that Flynn wouldn't abandon him #but Flynn is making sure that not just Yuri knows through his actions but that others know it too #and ultimately Yuri doesn't need to hear it. he can believe it because he can see it #Yuri doesn't need to hear it bc he understands Flynn's feelings without needing to hear it