#this is mostly a vent but i figure this would make for good lore and worldbuilding writing

[sootbonnie]

(( cw: vent , remixed as worldbuilding ))

lately, when i look in the mirror, i notice my flame being a lot more stagnant and stifled. my mood hasn't been great for the past month; at times, i feel myself overheating until my head begins fracturing. now, i'm afraid my head will explode and cause some sort of property damage — i don't think the flame protection talismans are meant for that kind of energy discharge.

the overheating is becoming a problem because occasionally, my flame will flare up violently...and inadvertently cause mild burns to anyone nearby. i've been trying to not interact with Travelers as much nowadays because of that.

i was reviewing some scientific literature regarding Elementals when i stumbled upon this line...

"One of the most dangerous things a Fireborne can do is prevent their own flame from burning bright. Research on this is limited due to the scarcity of Fireborne individuals, but anecdotal evidence suggests this is detrimental to Fireborne physiology and psychology."

usually, smothering your own flame for a short period of time isn't an issue; long-term suppression is when that leads to health problems. it's even more of a concern when it happens involuntarily, since the vigor of our flames is tied to our emotional state. i don't think i've been properly letting my emotions run their course. i haven't had a chance to properly vent to anyone lately...

...is there anywhere i feel comfortable doing that, nowadays? maybe... maybe it's just me used to being so independent that i default to concealing my own emotional turmoil.

i've been taking more naps in the hammock outside at the advice of my concierge staff, but the onset of summer heat has been making naps less cozy. ice cream helps, though!

...

this too shall pass. ignore it and keep moving.

#cw: vent #lore #worldbuilding #bonnie rambles #this is mostly a vent but i figure this would make for good lore and worldbuilding writing

[katyspersonal]

i hate to be that guy but i wish there were more bb fics that were less smut and more lore bc for such a rich story there is mostly just nsfw stuff in the ao3 tag lol. but no offense if ppl like that..

Your feelings are valid, anon!

Like, yeah, it is one of those 'kinda petty gripe' moments I was talking about! People are completely valid to spend their time and effort on what makes them (and often their mutuals and fans) happy! Yet at the same time, I am myself a huge fucking NERD about timeline, concepts, worldbuilding, messages, philosophy, specifics of factions and covenants, systems of 'magic' and science within the lore and all that, and if presented with a choice between the hottest fanfic for my OTP or an oddly detailed fictional research paper on something complex that went within the lore, I'd not even hesitate to pick the latter xd

There ARE many things to think about in BB, yes! My personal favorite to dissect were how Kin works and headanons about Great Ones (ALL of them). I have not found a cool way to put my BB worldbuilding dissections into a fic, tho... :') Me and @val-of-the-north also dream of writing a large prequel of Pthumerians history with what predated dungeons and some known characters. But we are more visual artists than writers. Sigh!

I could offer an advice for the situation when you have a gripe with something that is most popular in a fandom, and wish people did more interesting stuff:

1) Have a tiny group of people who are bitter about the same thing (can also be conveniently put in a Discord chat)! It is extremely therapeutic to have a few friends with whom you can be haters together, so you vent it all out and go to the 'public' fandom all happy and cheerful, not carrying this negativity to the open internet where people that love [a thing] can see it. I mean- I do have a group like this! Our most frequient petty haters sessions are pouting at the fact that this or that character only gets remembered as part of a ship and not as their own person xd Feeling heard in a small group where your words can't hurt anyone, nor anyone will guilt you for being "entitled" is just. good.

2) Create the stuff you would like to see more of (drawings, fanfics, essays, theories, headcanons, memes prompting an idea in a subtle way even), or encourage people to think more about this stuff (prompting discussions, buying art/fic commissions, doing trades (art for fic, for example), catching a person that accepts requests and spending yours on what you'd like to see more of, sending people asks that could trigger to develop something about lore etc). Really mind the latter, though! Like... trust me dude, even if you can't draw or write, nor have enough money for commissions, you can still cause pretty tangible influence on creativity! If you just say right things at the right time to the right people. Heck- I more or less got some skill at inspiring people creatively <:3 Like... I prompt a person to think of this or that theme or character, and before I know it they already developed something because of that discussion? (not tryna boast xd) Or another good example is @heraldofcrow who mastered the skill of prompting discussions about Bloody Crow sooooo well that people keep becoming his fans because of her, and some are even drawing him thanks to her! I constantly see people creating more content of the boy thanks to her, and all she did was simply talking to them! xD A gripe at a character, theme, concept etc not being popular enough can cause GREAT things to happen and you can become people's MUSE! 😎

_______________

Hmmmm I think that's it! Basically? You probably have more charisma to inspire writers (including to fiddle with lore) than you are aware of. They need readers, AND they need ideas. You will figure this out! ...or even write a killer fanfic yourself.

#fandomry rambles #crow is the QUEEN of influence lol xd #i am close second tho fsdhfhds #ask replies

[sbc-moved]

So like….if your fanart of you and Mario came up on my dashboard and I thought it was super super adorable and I wanted to know more about the self insert oc you have in that universe…would you tell me??? 🙈🙈🙈

YES OF COURSE OH MY GOD !!!;&:&?848939?

okay, so whenever I draw my silly little pictures I have two self inserts- a vampire and the mushroom girl that I’ll use and sometimes it’s just myself; here’s an example of each

Usually when I depict myself directly the artwork is more personal, usually for comfort or for vents or my like. Real world relationship with the character if that makes sense but moving on.

(Also just for simplicity sake I refer to my s/is in the third person but they are all just. Me but with a few little bonus features Y’know?)

So the first one is called Princess Ironfang, and she’s a vampire princess right. She’s my oldest Mario s/i dating back to around 2021?

Her like. Lore I guess is more heavily tied to the games. And by that I mean I’ve got an entire game planned out. In my head. But she lives in this like. Haunted castle and it looms ominously over the mushroom kingdom right. So it’d be like, a Luigi’s mansion style game. But basically the story is that Mario and Luigi mess up her ghosts and goblins and whatever and it starts a bit of a riff between her and Mario specifically- due to this she teams up with bowser just to get on his nerves but anyway, it’s only like. Later down the line when they have to team up to save Luigi do they start to get along. There’s a few details I’ve left out but that’s like the jist of it. But, she’s been benched as of late in favour of the new girl who I’m absolutely in love with

Mushroom girl 😈😈 her full name is Staci A. Compestrist (all my s/is have my name) and I prefer her a lot more since I feel she’s a more accurate depiction of my personality compared to Ironfang. Im still working on her design but I’ve got her story mostly figured out and it’s more centred around the movie (but it’s also applicable to the games and in my head I kinda. mesh the two together. Not important)

But she acts as a sort of lady in waiting and bodyguard for Princess Peach, she’s like. Her right hand woman or whatever idk. She’s very protective of the princess and initially sees Mario as a major threat to her safety so they don’t get along at first before eventually growing closer. Like I said she’s a reflection of myself so although she’s generally friendly, she’s also quite short tempered and stubborn and can be hard to win over. She’s not really a good bodyguard, and she’s more so just a really close friend of the princess who’s kept near by. I’ve projected a lot more onto her than I did Ironfang which is probably why I favour her more eughf

THA K YOU SO MUCH FOR LETTING ME RAMBLE THOUGHHFF ARAHHHHHHH I love putting myself into the media I consume and I love constructing elaborate stories and lore for my self inserts and it feels great to have people take interest in the stuff I’m doing gahhh !!!!))?

#sorry for being so un normal about this but it’s just !!! #SO NICE to have someone ask #selfship #self insert #super mario oc #self shipping #♡.mail box

[wulvert]

more lore questions for u,,,same as before pls feel free to add more or avoid answering if u dont wanna spoil something/would rather it be shown in the comic!! i dont personally care about spoilers/implications but this is UR awesome media!! its completely up to u :]

do vampires naturally run colder since their heart beats slower, or are they still a normal human body temperature?

how much do vampires hunters actually know about vampire lore besides what it takes to kill/weaken/hurt them? are they mostly clueless?

is it public knowledge vampires and other creatures like trisha exist, or does the average person have no idea theres ghouls and beasties out there?

besides the bloodlust, would vampires suffer any similar symptoms to anemia when they're haven't drank, since it would mean they have a low rbc count? or would any symptoms besides bloodlust be more similar to human starvation? maybe a mix of both?

is it possible for vampires to drink non-human/non-vampiric blood, like animal blood? if it is, would most vampires just find it too small/distasteful a portion for it to be worth it? also, does this mean animals would be targeted as well when a vampire's in a bloodlust frenzy?

is,,,scarlet a vampire hunter?? ex-vampire-hunter??? i assumed she was since kelly recognized her and she seems knowledgeable about it, and tracked avery down, but its also rly funny to imagine she isn't and everyone at the bbq just going "strange! this woman isn't a hunter how'd she get here! well anyways. we'll make an exception bc she looks very polite and avery's finally introducing us to a friend (🏳️‍🌈🤨❓️). good for her!"

also not really a question but. ur lore implies avery was maybe just. blacked out laying in her own blood for at maximum a week before anyone went looking for her and its so. in character for her wet and patheticness,,,i love the unseen details in ur writing!!

hello!! I think it shouldnt be too spoilerly, heres the lore....

vampires are very cold, & its uncomfortable for them, so they end up sleeping next to radiators & heat vents like cats- blankets dont make them warmer either cause theres no body heat to trap under, they just insulate their coldness.

averys more knowledgeable about vampires than other vampire hunters just bc of her upbringing ( i think i mentioned it before? her entire huge family are all vampire hunters & shes been raised into it ), I think the average vampire hunter knows the basics, like stake silver sun crucifix, but I think they probably figure vampires are more zombie like than they actually are, scarlet was probably pretty disturbed to realise she's still herself now that shes a vampire, but avery already knew that's how it works- even if shes decided she can just say no to bloodlust, thats just her being her despite knowing better ( yes scarlet is also a vampire hunter ahah but shes found a loophole & doesnt hunt vampires anymore, but still gets paid for it :)

Vampires, werewolves etc. arent a secret but they arent thought about very much! theyre thought of being a lot more rare than they actually are

when vampires r hungry their veins hurt and they cant think about much other than blood. as for anemia their hands and feet cant get much colder but they can go kind of grey if starving 4 a extended period of time, and overall extremely pale. avery has no blood left right now which is why shes like. grey (people ask why scarlet doesnt look as dead as avery, its cuz she drinks blood regularly & also wears makeup) no fatigue though, i think they get very agitated.

vampires cannot drink non human/vampire blood, itd have the same effect as orange juice but like itd be gross bc its animal blood and it wouldnt taste good to them and theyd still feel sick 0 pros all cons :(

yea avery was lying in her pool of blood for a week 😔 kelly probably called her like 4 days in but didnt think much about it bc shes aloof and offputting 90% of the time anyway so it made sense for her to disappear for a bit... nobody else cared though

[jinleebelee]

Heya welcome to my lee vent random blog

Hiya I'm jinlee most be just call me Jin got short and well this blog is just as it sounds, a big old lee vent blog with a bunch of lee nonsense and the occasional meme or too.

I'm in the sfw tickle community so nsfws please be advised and I am 18 so I be changing the 7 to fucking 8 and I hate it and love it

I'm a switch but I'm mostly lee if ya couldn't tell already by the title above. Sooo yeah I'm just making this thing to share a little about myself cause I can and feel like it would be for the benefit of the benefit.

Starting off I do have aspergers and can tend to forget like a lot. And I mean like a lot lot lot lot lot. Soo just be well aware I tend to not understand somethings or certain things l, I also have social anxiety which means we'll to put in a easy to understand way I'm pretty much scared of people and tend to worry over the smallest things.

Also if anyone wants to ya know starting chatting me up or try to become friends snd shit I'm down I just might not reply right away or reply eight awaybthen not come back, I have some family stuff going on and have to be their for them just incase so yeah

Also please be aware if ya tease me out of the blue I do tend to get really flustered and might say the following lines of

WHAG WHAG WHAY WHERE DID YOY COME FROM, IM GONNA FLIPPEN KILL YOU AND GET YOU BACK blah blah I'm not tryin to mean or anything it's just I get so God damn flustered and caught up but if I say something that ya think wasn't called for just tell me and we can work something out alright

Anyways enough about all thay crap, to say the least I'm in a lot of fandoms and I'm not over estimating about it. I cooould share a long lists of fandoms that Most people will know or won't know but I won't so I'll just share some of the things I'm into and also some other stuff besides fandoms like hobbies and crap

Things I'm into

-anime

-managa

-cartoons

-horror shit

-drawing

-writing (especially my oc lore)

-my maximalist room with my big ass collection of shit)

-piano

-getting into fandoms

Soooo yeah yeah yeah

Also I use he him they them it its pronouns so please use these pronouns to address me

Bountries

Now I'm not much of boundary person I don't think but I just wanna list em

Please don't ask me for my face photo unless you are my friend or have just became friends I have a big fear of people outside the community finding this soo yeah

Some people have seen my maxamlist styled room and know that is covered to ceiling amd wall with posters. Not to mention my collection of figures and stuff but only friends can ask for room pics because of privacy and shit

Also also just don't be a pedo if ya know then ya know and if i feel uncomfortable enough I'll either tell ya or if worse comes to worse block your ass. So yeah

Oh and friends can have my social crap. Snap insta discord ecttttt

Also I'm not into like lickle tk thingies so yeahhhh sorry I don't have anything against it like if you like that's fine but with me I'm just kinda like nooo I'm good ya know ya know

Anyways that's a enough of my stupid

#tickle community #tickle #tickles #lee #leemood #sfw tickles

[dana-chan-the-control-brain]

Silly question about Fnaf! I'm trying to teach my brother about the fnaf lore and he asked me “If Charlie is the puppet and she's supposed to be good, why does she try killing the nightguard in fnaf two” I had no idea how to answer this, to be honest, and figured you might be able to help? Sorry to be a bother. Some searches say it is because the nightguards wear the same purple uniform as William or that Charlie just no longer trusts any adults but they never provide a source for this stuff

See this is something I never really understood.

There's always a disconnect with THE LORE(tm) and how it relates to the actual gameplay. Especially in Fnaf2 and Fnaf3 specifically.

My only take away from fnaf2, is that the Puppet is extremely distrustful of adults and is just trying to protect all the other kids. Which is probably why the game is centered around the mechanics of the Puppet. (mostly balancing the Puppet and Foxy at the end of the day. All the Vent animatronics are pretty interchangeable once you know the audio ques)

However, I can not for the life of me understand the Puppet's role in fnaf3...

I know that all of the animatronics are Phantoms besides Springtrap, but I was always under the impression, that the Phantoms were the spirits following Mike. Just cause we live in a world of ghosts, I highly doubt they're JUST Hallucinations.

Which makes the Puppet's role in Fnaf3 even more strange.

If it's in Charlie's nature to be the "protector" of the group....

Why the hell does the Puppet GRAB your face, and Prevent you from looking at Springtrap for VERY LONG periods of time.... Even causing him to get in your office more than any other animatronic...

The gameplay of the Puppet in Three would almost give me the impression that they were working together?!

The only thing I can come up with, is that maybe because they're dead, they don't realize that the Springtrap Rabbit is the man who killed them.

(a common trend we see in the books, and now the movie)

So maybe the phantoms are working with springtrap just cause they don't realize they're protecting their murderer.

But I do find it funny from a gameplay perspective, that Puppet is the one that holds you still long enough so Springtrap can just stab you in your office.

It's a pretty funny image.

#fnaf #fnaf2 #fnaf3 #Five Nights at Freddy's #danachan's rants

[arttrampbelle]

Warning vent ahead. Vent about characters needing to be child free. And we need to normalize characters being child free mostly. But also vents about fandom in general.

So if you dont like that. Scroll on.

Cw: vent,talking about being child free

Unpopular opinion but

Shang tsung should be child free. That should be common fucking sense but here we are.

Any fan kids i make are aus. Period.

I love hcs about fankids but also

i hate that stupid fucking annoying af bullshit hcs of mileena being a daughter to shang when basic fucking lore states she is shao kahns daughter. And is the cloned sister of kitana. You know her whole fucking purpose?! She can make amends with kitana and be actual sisters without having to be fucking cutesy with shang. Leave shang out of your weird hcs. Just leave shang out of kitana and mileenas life period. Like my mans did not wanna be there. He hates shao kahn. He hates working there. He had no choice but to be some bitch lapdog minion for shao kahn. Which he absolutely fucking hated. He fucking hates them. Period. He never wanted to make mileena he was ordered to by force. The only one that felt remotely something for mileena was tanya and maybe reptile but thats about it. Period.

Leave shang out of things he doesn't need to be. The only part he had in mileenas life was basically being a fucking wet nurse. Milly was a test tube baby made FOR SHAO KAHN ORDERES BY SHAO KAHN BECAUSE AGAIN HE COULDN'T MANIPULATE KITANA BECAUSE OF SINDEL. (i can't believe i have to state basic lore to people.)

In fact its kinda insulting to her character. To be fam with a dude that legit did not give a fuck about her. And barely saw her as a person. She was an experiment. Period.

Like shang tsung can be soft without having kids. Shang can be soft WITHOUT MILEENA.

Shang tsung can be soft as a mentor figure TO SOMEONE ELSE! a teacher. He canonly teaches others who follow him or revere him.

Why not make him soft that way?

Why does he NEED a child to soften him?

Like my fan kids and aus aside.

Shang tsung can be soft for someone without having to have kids to do so.

Normalize not having kids. Normalize not wanting kids. Normalize characters being child free. Normalize being cool with kids but not wanting kids.

IF AND ONLY IF shang were to have kids. Im gonna put it bluntly honey. He would rather have kids from his own ballsack,the old fashioned way,literally fucking someone he actually gives a shit bout(which would be rare in of itself) then make a fucking clone or have a clone be made. Im sorry not sorry never will be sorry.

Shang tsung is kinda vain. Just as a reminder. He is a villain after all and i feel you guys forget this.

He can be soft,sweet,a good husband,a loving man,gentle or domestic even.

But he doesn't need children to prove that. Or show it.

Again we can have fankids. We can show aus.

But please if a character has to have kids to show their worth. I dont want it.

Personally I may or may not have kids of my own some day. Maybe not who knows? I care about them enough to wanna be stable enough to do so. And be able to provide. But also make sure my partner is comfortable too. Because thats what youre supposed to do. Do i think i could be a good mom? Sure. I do also have support. But im being smart about shit. Also we need to normalize not wanting children too because not everyone is like me nor would be a good parent. We need to normalize being child free,Even on our blorbos. Again i dont hate kids nor people who want them. Again im not sure,i may or may not have any of my own. But the problem is people think you HAVE to have kids to be whole,domestic,loving,nurturing,etc. You can be paternal and nurturing without having children. Of your own or adopted. Like ffs!

So plz. Can i have one fic,one art,some crumb of shit. Where shang is soft and domestic and sweet. WITHOUT HIM BEING A FATHER?! (Again fankids and clearly stated aus dont count. Because those are aus and fankids are just that,a fankid. Canon characters he "created" need to not be taken literally. Because i swear people need to shove a societal check box into everything. And even then,nrs doesn't give a crap but that doesn't mean you ignore basic fucking lore. Just because nrs and ed boob doesn't give a fucking damn. Don't mean you should ignore basic lore. MILEENA IS SHAO KAHNS DAUGHTER AND AT VERY LEAST IS KITANAS CLONED SISTER(which again they should make amends,because if hanzo n kaui can so can they. But then again y'all dont really give a fuck about women nor female characters,so yeah) POINT BLANK PERIOD END OF DISCUSSION DIE MAD)

#shang tsung #mortal kombat #mortal kombat discourse #unpopular opinion #very unpopular opinion #plz let characters be child free #vent #shang can be soft without being a father #if shang tsung is a father it would be to his own kids not a clone he made for a tyrant #he cared not for mileena outside of an experiment he never saw her as a complete person only an asset to his goals lets be blunt and honest #mileena never had anyone besides tanya maybe give a shit about her #kitana needs to make amends so they can be proper sisters and leave fucking shang tsung out of people fucking heads #sorry i just hate that ONE hc with mileena n shang with a burning passion #like srry for talking in the tags but yeah

[shy-magpie]

RQG 166

Where in there is shipping, talk of strange magics, and preparations are made

"Smooth Sailing" is not quite up there with "everything is fine" but its ominous.

So is this strictly to annoy Alex or did they notice fandom commenting on how fast they spoke?

No sexy Jesus then it can't be Grant

I love Hamid made them all cold weather gear

Tension for long periods sucks. Azu is going to find Kiko!

Cel points out that Azu asking if Kiko wants "take a break together"!

Hamid is also a shipper on deck!

Kiko sees Hamid & Cel sharing thumbs up A love nest?

Azu is nervous!

Azu refuses because she doesn't want to risk it while they are in danger; Kiko doesn't want to die sober

Kiko hangs out in the nest because it beats throttling Carter.

Kiko takes control of the conversation, since Azu is jumping quite a bit ahead; asks what Azu is doing in Japan on her way to Svalbard. Azu starts to say "save the world" when Ben points out infosec, panics and says "nothing".

Oh Earhardt is the captain of Kiko's adopted father, a gnome named Elbert. Azu goes pretty vague, says she want to be high priestess of Aphrodite which means good works like healing people. At this point Kiko asks if she could do anything about the crick in her neck. Which seems a bit "lay your hands on me".

Alex draws a vail there beyond asking Helen if Azu kisses on the first date (yes a little one).

Hamid & Cel notice Azu coming back up alone. Azu tells them she had a kiss: Hamid claps, Cel squeals.

Oh the bears climbed to the top of real mountains to die.

Earhardt asks Zolf if he thinks something killed the bears. Zolf basically says we'd see it coming.

Earhardt is more worried about the effects of the borealis on the ship.

Zolf says to take it to a vote. Earhardt tries to tell Zolf to handle it, Zolf tells her it should be her

Zolf gathers them all, giving Azu an approving pat on the arm.

Earhardt isn't actually bad at this. Lore time!

Hamid is trying to share his magic knowledge again, but he still sounds nervous.

Cel asks if something like the antimagic cell would help, but I don't know if they can persue that? Yeah spells and material.

Zolf points out that they have magic types fairly covered.

Oh so this is explicitly not like Rome.

Hamid figures its mostly safe.

Zolf asks how the Kobolds feel!

They get that its dangerous and ask it they can kill it. They ask if they can make a lightning rod! Clever Kobolds. Cel follows up the idea.

The lightning rod would protect a room below decks but it would send the danger elsewhere.

Oh Hamid wants to transfer the magic into spells rather than just vented dangerously.

The Cohort looks to Hamid before voting. Earhardt voted nay because the detour would take them someplace useful; but takes being out voted with grace.

Wilde offers to drive or give the anklets to Zolf since they offer protection. Zolf doesn't want him taking either risk but agrees to teach him in case Zolf can't fly. The rolls for the lightning rod are so very low. Only Cel knows that its "a bit sketch" but the others think its fine. Earhardt wants to head to enemy territory and the party knows it.

Sussura is a lovely name for a Kobold. Skraak & Sussura are arguing about something. Sussura tells them that unless they can do better they should take what Cel is offering. They take Cels hand leads them inside and turns around makes a rude gesture then asks if they want inside or outside!

Cel offers Sussura the fang. Cel misses that Sussura looks at them with even more respect or adoration than they look at Hamid. Azu catches it.

Helen tells Cel they all trust them. Which makes it so much worse.

Alex doesn't tell us how well Wilde learns. The safe room is actually a modification of the living area.

Zolf makes the usual vague catch you on the flip side noises. Earhardt tells him this risk is only worth it while the borealis is near and to get them asap.

Hamid asks to cast a spell on Zolf. Its called "Heroism" and gives +2 on a bunch of things for 90 minutes.

Cel reminds them there is still an element of risk but is more cheery than they were. We fade out on the image of Zolf sailing into danger.

#rusty quill gaming #rqg 166 #rqg spoilers #live blog thingy

[annikuh]

some Jax lore ahead + some (mostly) annika tmi and vent LOL but I just needed to share this (I’ll put it under a cut)

I don’t know why but one of my favorite moments I’ve ever had with Jax was when I was working on how their biology worked and how they would have sex (bc i was workin on syvis stuff at the time).

i figured that Jax would have a really difficult time bc, more often than not, the body they’re in ends up being male so they can’t get hard at all. which is super distressing for them in general bc they’re so touch-starved but have no idea what to do for themself and nothing seems to work at all. but it’s even MORE distressing when they meet syvis bc they’re like… ‘oh fuck what am I supposed to do here???? what am I supposed to tell her???? she’s gonna be so disappointed or weirded out or whatever.’ and I was satisfied with this being the case, I was like ooh this is fun, it’ll be an interesting challenge to write for.

and then like MUCH later on I was having sex and I was like, wait a fucking second am I stupid???? that’s fucking me too, what the hell how didn’t I notice this???? bc *I* don’t fucking work either! *I* have very specific and hard-to-work-around dysfunctions that make sex difficult too, and it’s always been a significant and embarrassing and distressing issue in *my* life too! there’s no writing challenge to be had here, im unconsciously writing about myself yet again!

and like, idk why but it was really overwhelming in a good way. I was just like aww my Jax🥺 like even when I’m not trying to make them like me, they still are, and there was something comforting about it. like they always get me, we always have each other to relate to. like obvi i made Jax, but they also just straight up feel like their own person who exists in some other dimension and we just have a psychic connection that lets us communicate. so like you can imagine the comfort that I felt in that moment when I was laying there absolutely fighting with my body and hating it so much and I had this realization. it always feels so fucking lonely and now suddenly I realized I had someone else I love that understands exactly what it’s like. It just felt like a hug, I wanted to cry.

this kind of thing happens a lot when I’m writing, just like subconscious choices that I later realize come right from my life, and I always love it, but this one really hit me so hard.

#annikuh’s speakin #Jax

[edwardelricsrightarm]

Riza Hawkeye as a child/young teen but she's just this Annie Oakley ass prodigal sharp shooter little shit who cuts her hair off with kitchen scissors and runs absolutely buckwild in the woods on her father's estate terrorizing small animals (humanely hunting I'm just being dramatic)

Roy boy is just this awkward nerdy little cornball who wants to get along, but they also kinda have that dynamic from the Swan Princess when Derek and Odette were kids ya feel me? Just watch the childhood montage from that movie you'll understand- ☠️

They have like nothing in common at the time (so they assume) and yet they end up thick as thieves cause Riza hasn't had many friends that she can see outside of her education and had an extremely isolated upbringing, so this goofy sweet baby faced dork just got her like that, even if he sometimes drives her nuts a little bit.

Riza would get upset fairly often bc her neglected social and emotional upbringing would get to her (bc realistically,,,,we know that was the case), and Roy got extremely good at knowing when she's upset and would often be the one to listen to her air her thoughts out (callback to the phone call scene after her encounter with pride, this lends background to how he knows her so well and reads her stress levels like a book even over the phone)

Mundane headcanons:

Roy would transmute little clay/dirt doves and targets for Riza bc he was worried about her shooting glass bottles and other assorted not necessarily safe objects.

Roy is trans, I can't untrans him that's just who he is to me. Riza is a self declared tomboy who I hc as nonbinary/demigirl. They're also bi4bi it's canon Arakawa told me.

Riza didn't really know good birthdays, and when Roy realized this it broke his heart bc Chris always tried to remember stuff like that for him and she's not even his own biological mother. So, he made an annual routine of gifting her something (often transmuted and unique).

Riza loved being out in nature back then and knew the wooded areas around the estate like the back of her own hand, when she and Roy had warmed up more to one another she made a routine of showing him all the neat little spots she'd found in the area for one reason or another, just for the sake of sharing that with someone. These remain some of their fondest memories.

Riza would be more likely to go out to shoot targets when she was angry or upset, if she was having a good day and had the time she would be more likely to go hunting because she enjoyed the hiking and tracking but couldn't focus on it when internally upset. Roy eventually figured this out as well.

Riza climbed so many trees, rocks, outcroppings, etc- and was always scraped up from something she probably shouldn't have climbed getting the better of her.

Riza used to have a nanny birddog named Otto, but he passed away before Roy came around, so making a new friend in him after that loss was a big comfort to her. She was hesitant to have other dogs until Hayate.

They're both autistic.

Relatedly, Riza would go nonverbal and lock herself in her room sometimes. Roy, concerned, would approach this by slipping little notes under the door offering company if needed, while not pushing her to talk.

Riza would sing/hum while doing chores or out and about exploring and on every occasion Roy overheard this he'd turn red from ear to ear- if she caught it and realized he'd heard she'd be twice as embarrassed.

Riza would take Roy foraging and showed him some useful/edible plants, and safe berries and mushrooms that she knew in the region. He was honestly always pretty impressed, especially considering some mushrooms that are safe have toxic siblings that look identical.

Both of them are varying levels of nerd. Riza is the type who's full of trivia, especially weird facts about her special interests (animal behavior, guns, bushcraft, navigation and tracking stuff, etc), Roy started out neutral to this but over time infosharing kinda became their love language, and he'd start to infodump right back. They'd spend hours like that some days.

Riza knows constellations really well for navigational reasons, and there were times that she showed Roy a way to get onto the roof from the attic and they'd stargaze. She would teach folk names of constellations, regional lore behind them, navigational uses for them etc; Roy would tell her basic facts about space and astronomy that come with understanding of alchemy.

Riza typically stuck to small prey (rabbits, fowl, easy to retrieve misc.), but Roy had an awakening when Riza first killed a whole ass deer (albeit a young one) and came back with it thrown over both shoulders with the determined energy of a small lionness.

Riza is REALLY good at cooking and baking because she had a bit too much free time to fuck around in the kitchen. She also learned how to cure and smoke meats bc of her hunting. It certainly helped them stay well fed.

Roy developed a habit of cooking for the household pretty regularly in a swapped routine with Riza after only a while of being around because he saw how much she had to be self sufficient in almost every way and honestly just wanted to relieve her of the constant responsibility and self parentification. He'd also help with chores constantly.

Roy had major internal conflict even early on because he respected his teacher greatly for his intelligence and brilliance, but also kned that Riza wasn't being raised well, and that no matter what he does, Berthold can only decline mentally. This is the root of his protective and caretaking behavior with her, ultimately.

Roy doodled and sketched a lot back in the day and had a little booklet that he guarded with his life bc it started out random assorted things, but eventually devolved into a book full of cute little doodles of mostly Riza jammed into the last half of the book (She can never know-). He still has it stored away.

Riza could easily pick him up even then, this never changed. She got to show this once when he sprained his ankle on a hike with her and she held half his weight as a crutch with no strain to herself. He never quite recovered from that (but boy did it make his crush worse).

Roy would notice rarely he'd have a shirt go missing and never could figure out why til he'd find Riza wearing an identical shirt. (She told herself it's just cause they're cozy of course- she just likes boys clothes too! They look nice under overalls and are comfortable to sleep in! nothing more /s) They never said a word about it even though it was right in front of them, they couldn't dare.

Roy had a bike, and she'd ride behind him down some of the rural roads and paths that could support it for fun sometimes.

During winter the home would get pretty chilly because of its size and not enough stoves/fireplaces to fully warm the declining estate, so when snowed in on miserably cold winter days they'd usually end up reclined in the study by the space heater or in the loungeroom by the fireplace reading separately, but still occasionally talking back and forth.

Riza stopped hunting post-Ishval. She couldn't bring herself to derive that same innocent pride and appreciation for the circle of life she once had, and felt she no longer deserved to have that respectful exchange with the cycle of life and death after what her skills had been used for. She never stops going to shooting ranges, but it's either for standard upkeep of practice or to vent.

#royai #roy mustang #riza hawkeye #young royai #fmab #fullmetal alchemist brotherhood #fma #fma brotherhood #headcanons #long post

[littlemoondarling]

It's time for me to as always be the one to send you tons of questions for an ask game lol ✌ 4, 17, 20, 22, 24, 25, 31, 33, 40, 43, 48, 50

4. A character you rarely talk about?

Bunny.... I really like them, her personality and struggles are pretty relatable. I think I just don't like the design I gave him, and that really puts me off of a chatacter. Might end up redesigning him.

17. Any OC OTPs?

Well I'll tell you the two that are least likely to happen: Rouge x Theodore. Rouge x Lucifer.

20. Do any of your OCs sing? If they sing, care to share more details (headcanon voice, what kind of songs they like etc)?

Ouh now this is a FUN one!

Rouge was a trained musical theatre performer in his youth, so I think David Staler would be a good headcanon voice. His favourite music is still soundtracks, he loves songs that tell a story.

Marcel is just fuckin good lol, and I think AURORA's voice would fit him pretty well. He doesn't exactly listen to songs, but if he were to, it would be heavy metal.

22. Is there any OC of yours people tend to mischaracterize? If yes, how?

I can't tell you how much I like this question, but I don't know...

24. If you could meet one OC of yours, who would it be and why?

Probably Theodore, I mean he's just fun to be around and I literally created him because I'm lonely and wished I could be someone so confident and sure of myself as he is.

25. The OC that resembles you the most (same hobby, height, shared like/dislike for something etc?)

Elliot is like a split image of me lol (except that he's taller, tho Theodore is the same height as me). He is trans and was emotionally abused as a kid, he feels as if his problems don't matter and prefers to keep them to himself eventhough he desperately needs to talk to someone. He has social anxiety and struggles with accepting the fact that he could possibly be loved by anyone. He likes writing songs and poetry but hates performing them like me, he's also an aspiring writer with tons of wips that will probably never be finished :'3

31. Pick one OC of yours and explain what their tumblr blog would be like (what they reblog, layout, anything really)

Theodore is the one that actually has a tumblr blog (I'm thinking of actually making one for him... should I?) He'd mostly post design sketches, his progress on his projects, cooking recipes, the newest thing that got broken in his cheap apartment, alot of Franny's drawings because he's just a proud dad, the newest anime obsession, a character he's simping over, how hard it is to pass a video game boss and general venting. He'd mostly reblog animal pics, anything that has to do with the shows he likes, tons of gifs, FANART, other people's cooking adventures and parenting advice.

33. Your shyest OC?

Mmm I'd say Ayumu

40. Any fond memories linked to your characters? Feel free to share!

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm the moment I discovered that Teddy was my comfort character lol

43. Do you have any certain type when you create your OCs? Do you tend to favour some certain traits or looks? It’s time to confess

Aaaahhh YES I DO. Almost all of my ocs look androgynous because I just fucking love that look, I don't have a single oc with short hair bebecause I just really like long hair, alot of them have curly/fluffy hair along with plump lips and a sort of hourglass figure. And if I didn't worry about same face syndrome, all of them would have long faces.

48. OC who is a perfect cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure

I don't have a single older oc like that because I don't exactly like that trope, but I have Fran who is just the light at the end of the tunnel, I love this dude, he's so smol and full of life and hope and excitement.

50. Give me the good ol’ OC talk here. Talk about anything you want.

Well, I've been working on more of general lore lately, and I discovered that I really like just creating cultures and traditions for my realms, now I'm not gonna say that they are totally unique but I just like the process!

#aaahhhh #thank you!!! #ask!!! #oc lore #theodore #rouge #fran #elliot #bunny #marcel #ayumu

[dothwrites]

@sextualfantasy requested destiel with Jealous!Dean, and the MotW being wildly flirtatious with Cas. <3 

---

Dean grits his teeth as he stares down at the table, watching the couple--watching the two people across the table from him in the reflection of a spoon. He needs to relax. His jaw hurts from the force of his irritation, but every time he makes an effort to loosen his jaw, he hears the scraping, tinkling laugh of the kikimora. Worse yet are the cooed endearments, all dropped directly in Cas’ lap, for Cas to do whatever Cas does with compliments, but for Dean to obsess over, until he’s nothing more than a tightly wound ball of tension that’s three seconds away from exploding. 

Definitely wasn’t supposed to go down like this. 

It was supposed to be a fairly easy case--3 men, all in fairly good health, went to bed one night and never woke up the next morning. The perplexed medical examiner finally put the cause of death down to heart attack, in lieu of any other explanation. But the rictus expression of fear and the clawed hands, frozen in the act of clutching the blankets, had all spoken of something unnatural. 

It had taken them a few tries before they landed on kikimora. They’re not common. To Dean’s knowledge, Dad had come across the hint of one once, and Bobby had killed one, once, about twenty years ago. Silver and salt, was all Bobby’s journal said, and Dad’s journal didn’t even say that much. Don’t look her in the eyes, was Bobby’s other piece of advice, along with the warning that kikimora usually fixated on young men, to drive them wild with desires, and young women, to drive them mad with jealousy. This one has deviated somewhat off script in that she’s literally terrifying men to death, which means that she has to be put down. 

It had been a foolproof plan, or as close to foolproof as the Winchesters got. Find the kikimora--the instructions were a little vague there, since all the lore said was that she would be in the guise of a beautiful woman and possibly have chicken feet--but Dean had figured with Cas alongside them, there wasn’t much cause to worry. While his grace isn’t what it used to be, Cas can still venture into a bar or club and pick out any ten monsters, usually before both his feet are in the door. Plus, there was an added advantage to bringing him along.  

“After all,” Dean had said, tucking his silver knife into the inner pocket of his suit, “you’ll be able to look her in the eyes, no problem.”

Dean should really know by now not to say shit like that.

Cas clocked the kikimora from the second they walked into the bar. He’d pointed her out to Dean, a waitress with long black hair and pale, porcelain skin. They’d gone over together, Dean carefully looking into the middle distance as Cas introduced them as agents and could they just have a word--The kikimora had glanced up, taken in the whole breadth of Cas’ face--the persistent stubble clinging to his jaw, the thick dark hair curling over his ears, the piercing blue eyes--and her smile had spread, predatory and pleased, across her face. Have more than one word sweetheart, she’d said, lilting voice reaching out to Cas. You can have all the words you like. 

Cas had taken one look at her face and--

If Dean strains his ears, he can hear the low rumble and scrape of Cas’ voice. From the second that Cas looked into the kikimora’s eyes, he hasn’t looked away. And her...She must have her boss under some kind of spell; either that or she’s not a waitress at all, because this whole damn time, after the first Well hey there handsome, that she threw Cas’ way, she hasn’t shifted from Cas’ side. 

Dean tries not to think about how the lore says that kikimora fixate on attractive men. About how they’ll drive them mad with desire. 

He chances a look. 

Cas doesn’t look driven mad with desire, but he doesn’t...not look driven mad with desire. Mostly, he’s wearing that Cas look that he gets when he’s listening intently to someone--the small line that knits between his eyebrows, the determined little purse of his lips, the laser-like focus of his eyes on another person. Dean’s used to that person being him. 

An ugly emotion swirls in his gut and claws its way up his throat as he watches the kikimora laugh and reach out. Her hand rests on Cas’ wrist, fingertips daring to slip underneath the cuff of his shirt to flirt with the bare skin of his arm. Cas never shakes it off. No, Cas just leans in closer, tilting his head in the way that Dean had come to think possessively of as his. Dean watches him as he takes a sip of his drink. The beer leaves a remnant of foam shining on his upper lip. That’s when the kikimora reaches out and swipes her thumb over the curve of Cas’ upper lip, except it’s not a swipe, she’s just leaving her thumb there, resting on Cas’ lips like that’s her newfound property, and that--

Dean doesn’t register the low growl rumbling through his chest, or the fact that he’s already up on his feet, until he’s looming over the two of them.  

“Agent,” he says. He tries to repress all of the writhing emotions in his chest and it leaves his voice rough. He rifles through his brain for Cas’ alias and comes up empty. “Can I speak to you?” 

Finally, the kikimora’s thumb falls away from Cas’ lips as the angel turns to look at him. Dean keeps his eyes on Cas, ignoring the small huff of irritation from the kikimora. 

“We’re actually in the middle of something, if you don’t mind,” she says, when neither Dean nor Cas move. Her hand lands on Cas’ jaw, turning his face back towards her. “Hey sexy, I know your friend is cute and all, but he’s just going to have to wait his turn, all right?” 

For a moment, Dean forgets that they’re in a crowded bar. He forgets about all the bystanders and the need for subtlety. All he can see, through his red-tinted vision, is the kikimora, leaning in close to Cas, her hair cascading like a waterfall and hiding Cas’ face from view, as she calls him sexy. 

That’s his fucking angel, thank you very much. 

At the same time that Dean explodes out with Now look here skank, Cas leans in closer, tucks a bit of kikimora’s hair behind her ear and murmurs, “Come with me?” 

The kikimora flashes a triumphant smile at Dean as she runs her fingers through Cas’ hair, down to scrape across his jaw. “Of course,” she croons, stroking over his cheeks. “Let’s go.” 

Cas throws one impenetrable look over his shoulder towards Dean, before he’s up and walking away. Dean looks down to see that his fingers are laced with the kikimora’s. They disappear down the darkened hallway towards the bathrooms and, coincidentally enough, the back exit. The last thing Dean sees is the kikimora’s hand reaching up to twist a lock of Cas’ hair around her finger. 

Something hot and ugly curls in his stomach and Dean is out the door after them, pushing his way through various bodies as he makes his way past the bathrooms and into the alley behind the bar. It stinks back here, the dumpsters only feet away and the hood vents belching out grease, but it’s dark and private. 

His silver knife bumps against his hip and Dean draws it out, glad at least that bit of subterfuge is over with. Now there’s just the hunting things aspect of his job and he’s looking forward to that part more than usual. 

His ears pick up the unmistakable sound of a scuffle, followed by a sharp cry and an even sharper, “What the hell do you--” By now Dean’s running, the sounds of a fight sending adrenaline and anger and all those other twisted things that he likes to pretend don’t writhe around in him swimming to the surface. He rounds the corner of the dumpster to find--

Castiel, wiping blood off his angel blade, looking calm and collected as if he’s asking Dean’s opinion on which avocado is the right type of firm, I can’t quite tell the difference, and Dean has the sinking suspicion suddenly, as Castiel looks at him, that he’s never been as clueless as he’s let on. 

“Hello Dean,” Cas says, tossing the scrap of cloth onto the kikimora’s body with an almost imperceptible expression of distaste. His eyes flick to the blade in Dean’s hands. “I think you’ll find that unnecessary.” 

“Unnecessary.” Dean’s palm is sweaty around his knife; he doesn’t let it go. He stares at Cas, who looks at him as calmly as if they ran into each other in the library, but there’s something smoldering behind Cas’ eyes. Eleven years have given Dean a pretty good basis of knowledge for when Cas is fucking with him, and Cas...

Cas is fucking with him. 

“You let her put her hands on you,” Dean says. He can’t help how his walk changes--no longer the frantic, rush of worry and jealousy (all right, he can admit it, it was definitely jealousy twisting up his insides). Instead, now it’s the tight, coiled grace of a hunter. 

From the barely-there smile that ghosts across Cas’ face, he notices the difference as well. 

“She called you sexy and handsome, and she put her hands all over you.” 

“She did,” Cas agrees, smooth and easy and too fucking smug for his own good. 

Dean’s walking towards the edge of a precipice. He’s been crawling towards it for several years, but, it appears anyway, that Cas has gotten tired of waiting for him to get there on his own and has now taken the drastic step of simply drop-kicking him off the edge. 

And Dean should probably be more irritated that he was fucking played like a two dollar harmonica this whole night, but Cas is in front of him, smug and celestial, and everything that Dean ever wanted, and his, his his--

“You’re a fucking asshole, you know that?” Dean crowds against Cas, pushes him back against the wall. Hips, legs, shoulders, his hands cupping Cas’ face and tilting it up so that Cas’ eyes catch the sickly yellow gleam of the streetlight. Cas huffs out in silent laughter and the sound scours away any of the bitter jealousy clogging Dean’s veins until he’s just overwhelmed with Cas. “Fucking flirting right in front of me, what the hell?” 

“It seemed the best way to get your attention,” Cas murmurs, which is all Dean allows him to say before he’s closed the scant inch of space between them, his mouth landing messily over Cas’. 

The taste of Cas on his lips purges everything else from Dean’s memory and replaces it all with the exact sensation of how it feels to have Cas’ hands slipping underneath his suit jacket to land, scalding hot, on his waist. The kiss starts brutal but it softens after a second, Dean nipping at the swell of Cas’ lower lip, Cas tracing the seam of Dean’s lips until Dean opens to him. 

Dean doesn’t know how they kiss, there in the alley behind a dive bar. It could be minutes, it could be years. All he knows, is that when he finally pulls away from Cas, just to catch his breath, Cas tries to follow, lips finally separating from Dean’s with a soft, wet smack. Dean keeps his hands cupped around Cas’ cheeks and presses his forehead to Cas’, unwilling to pull too far away. Their breath mingles together, close and humid, in the few inches separating them. 

“We still have to take care of the body,” Cas finally says, ever the realist. Dean muffles his groan by pressing his mouth to the side of Cas’ jaw. He likes the rough scape of stubble against the tender flesh of his lips, does it again, just because. “And while I certainly wouldn’t be opposed to doing anything more, I’m quite opposed to continuing in our present location.” 

His libido kicked into high gear, Dean pulls far enough away to get a glimpse of the wicked twinkle in Cas’ eyes. “You...” he says, overwhelmed by the sheer evil genius of Cas. 

“Take care of the body Dean,” Cas tells him, with a gleam in his eye that Dean suspects has always been there. “And then we’ll...talk.”

Played like a two dollar banjo and all Dean can do is grin as he grabs the kikimora’s body and tries to figure out how he and Cas are going to handle this. 

Damn angel. 

#destiel #destiel fic #destiel fanfic #dean winchester #castiel #jealous!dean #oblivious!cas #or is he?? #dothwrites

[transformers-valiant-keepers]

I put so much investment into Roxie and Dadlock lately (I’m sorry) and it's all I ever think about them bc who doesn't love found family tropes. For TFTN, I took in key elements of characters, backstory and lores from IDW and incorporated the ideas into my own for TFTN.

I’ve been listening to Lasting Impression by Silent Descent when writing up Dadlock’s life (which probably fitting).

Trigger warnings for mentions of discrimination, drug use, implied dubcon, medic, shadowplay / mnemosurgery(?), child abuse, depression, implied suicide, ptsd trauma(?). 

I’ll put all of this under readmore

I've been thinking about how much similarities between Roxie and Drift in having to hide certain things about themselves from the society--with Roxie being deaf who has to constantly cover her hearing aids with her long hair, and Drift was a forged triple changer. 

Triple changers cybertronians bear the brunt of discriminations for being so different and the Functionalist Council saw them as a threat to Cybertron's future and the caste systems. Techno-organics also shared the similar reaction for being much different from others and were turned away by Functionalist medics.

It was pretty telling what Drift had gone through in his life… Before Roxie was constructed with his spark, before the Greatsword connected to his spark while unaware of the intentional true purpose in store for him and Roxie later on, and before Dai Atlas took him in to the Samurai clan. 

He did not start off as a good life living on the streets and homeless on Rodion. He was an independent, mostly kept to himself, barely opening up to anyone. He endured survival instincts living on the streets, and learnt self-defence battle protocols to defend himself when necessarily. 

Obtaining Energon for refuel wasn’t easy. He went through a dark place of sleeping rough, hooked on circuit boosters to spare the pain and selling himself for Energon through sexual activities. It wasn’t his choice nor how many times had he lost count when he came close to almost-deactivation from certain outcomes.

He never forgot the time he visited the medibay clinic to be patched up and to feel safe. That was the first time he saw Ratchet.

It was not the vivid life Drift wanted to remember for discussion. He spared the dark details of his early life and post-Shadowplay-to-Autobot’s assassin era from Roxie, because it’s not something he wanted to subject her to that exposure, even for one so young and carefree who was not exposed to the Functionalist era. He only shared his life after Dai Atlas approached and took him in, which changed his life completely, to his life amongst the Samurai clans. Dai Atlas was the closest thing he would call to a Sire. He became familiar with the likes of Cyclonus and Axe.

Axe and Cyclonus became his best friends who later became his Amica Endurae. Axe does not understand the life Drift went through--he had experienced living rough--but he was the only person he could trust enough to vent to. Cyclonus, on the other hand, understood what he went through and offered her shoulder for him to vent.

Crystal City was the safest place it had been in so long for Drift, not counting the fact a particular medical clinic had been relatively safe away from the backend alleys. Everything was good afterwards, he became a trained swordmech. It takes some adjustment for him to get used to sleeping in an actual berth provided for his own amongst other things--including Energon for refuel and to live. He did meet Ratchet, despite them having met long before when Drift lived on the rough streets.

Drift received upgrades to his frame, putting the past behind him to start anew under Dai Atlas’ mentorship, and touching the Greatsword had given him a second chance to move on from his past (obvious to the fact that the Greatsword had chosen him for a reason, or what fate had in store for him).

Becoming a Samurai was the best life-changer for him.

The Functionalists Council had arranged for Drift to be taken and captured (all the while, Pharma had secretly played a part in it) and was taken straight to the Institute where he was subjected to Shadowplay against his will.

Many years later, he eventually discovered Roxie’s existence… and somehow learnt she is his Kindred. And that instinct promptly activated his paternal Sire Coding within both his and Deadlock alter-ego’s programming. 

Life for Drift was royalty fucked up after Shadowplay had changed him into a deadly, fearless assassin with Emperor Nemesis as his handler (this was revealed in Prologue Part One). He was not known as Drift, he became Deadlock--likely a case of an alter-ego formed as the result from his traumas. Before all that discovery, he met Windblade and Perceptor who became two important figures in his life and opened up his spark. As a reminisce of his early days forcing to hide the fact he’s a triple changer, Windblade had to hide her cityspeaker ability whereas Perceptor had to hide his outlier ability and refrained himself from reading others’ thoughts. They hid this from the Functionalists and found themselves form a connetion with Drift after he saved them from unforseen situations. Drift knows what it’s like to hide and pretend, and sworn to sercery to keep both Windblade and Perceptor safe. He fell in love with Windblade and Perceptor--with an emotional deep connection with the young cityspeaker and scientist--but he never got to tell them both after they got separated apart from each others.

Roxie was constructed cold with her spark being a donor from Drift’s, thus forming a strong bond between the two--such bond between a Sire and a Kindred are considered rare in some cases. This is known as Cognatio Endurae.

Though, Roxie… didn’t have a good start after being subconsciously locked away in a stasis pod by the Emperor’s doings. The sad thing is? Drift does not know whether she was physically abused constantly through the bond whenever he was resistant against being controlled, or forced to obey commands, or goes against authority orders--and the thought alone had really broken him.

He tried to save her the first time but was caught out and forced to watch in horror as The Emperor abused Roxie in front of his optics--which played into the triggers whenever he saw Roxie was harmed and he shifted into his Deadlock persona way later on. Yes, Drift and Deadlock alter ego both genuinely care for Roxie. 

Techno-organics were not well-known to Cybertronians until the 22nd or 23rd Century, but one with an organic human DNA is considered rare. Now for Roxie, being a techno-organic and all… it wasn't easy to bring her up. Drift is new to parenting and can be a worrywart over her. His past actually helped him to adapt and care for her--he eventually grows into a better person than he used to be. 

Though, what Drift never prepared for… was Roxie diagnosed with severe hearing loss, aka Deaf / Hearing Impaired, in both audial receptors. He went as far to start his research and how to help her. He is patient and relied on the bond to communicate with her, he taught her to lipread--because he had little knowledge of sign languages. Once they get their servos on functioning Hearing Aids for her, she can hear their voices. It wasn't the best or helpful to her, Drift was relieved she was responsive to his voice like a sense of familiarity to her.

Due to the immense strong bond and prioritising Roxie first before himself, Drift turned off his pain sensors to take in the burdens and sensed her emotions and pains.

But her upbringing had its moments. Roxie hated hearing tests. It made her extremely stressed over the noise levels and the lowest ringing noises were the worst of all. She was a victim to disability discrimination by society, which she was completely shunned out and struggled to make any friends. It did hurt her and her hearing wasn't perfect that the kids relentlessly teased her for her difficulties--the aftermath forced her to cover ears and hearing aids with her long hair to hide her disability. 

She was dejected and left out, unsure whether to question where she would fit in in this universe. Drift sensed this coming through the bond and tried his best to comfort her as a father wanting to understand her. Roxie’s struggles with deafness had impacted on her mental health and she went through a dark place succumbing to negative voices and far too anxious to socialise with anyone.

She would cry herself to sleep with a wish how badly she wanted to hear, and bottled all of her emotions and issues to herself. She found it completely hard to talk or open up about her feelings--even to Drift and Axe. Such intrusive thoughts prone her despair into an emotional crying mess leading to Drift exposed his spark chamber to guide and soothed Roxie out of an anxiety attack keeping her focus onto his calming, pulsing spark and enfolded within his EM field filled with nothing more than a comforting familial love.

Suffice to say, Drift had coaxed gently, without pressuring her, got her to open up to him and listened to her confide in him. One time, she accidentally slammed Drift’s doorwing, which was very sensitive, when her emotions got the best of her during an outburst and of course, Roxie felt completely bad afterwards.

Meeting new people was difficult for her, much less making new friends without the unnecessary attention from adolescent organic males. Due to the society looking down on disabled people, Roxie doesn’t want to let anyone in, something that was passed on from her Sire, without putting her guarded wall down and succumbing to heartaches. She stayed--remained--close to Drift and Wing. She trusts them and they’re the only ones she relied heavily on for their support and speak on her behalf.

Beyond that, there were complications on their welfare over the years hiding on Earth, especially when Roxie’s health was concerned. Her height growth was stunted and slowed throughout her activated age. (At eighteen activated age as example, she stood at 5ft 4in). However, there’s major issues Drift and Axe had to deal with rationalizing Energon usage after the first time they watched Roxie overcome with extreme fatigue from low Energon. They were alerted by this despite the three of them living pretty rough to hide out on Hedonia without detecting the Autobots--they moved from one hideout to another, erasing their presence from their previous accommodations. Moving to a new place made Roxie unsettled the first few nights.

Drift’s early life resurfaced given the living arrangements on Hedonia, he was willingly to sacrifice his Energon for Roxie and replenish her energy and to avoid her body going into stasis shock. He had considered an Energon transfer reserved for emergencies only just for Roxie alone, and the process was risky that Axe had berated him for it on a dangerously low Energon withdrawal. Axe could understand due to Energon being scarce and trying to save as much credits that he had gone further to search and provide fuels for the three of them to survive.

Had they lived on Cybertron, specifically in the roughest places, Drift would’ve given away a full Energon to Roxie and spared little usage for himself to live through another day.

"A good Sire would do anything for their Kindred" Drift told Axe. And the truth is, Roxie was a beacon of light to Drift through the darker aspects of his life, even with being there for her through her low days.

That's as far I've written from my head about these two and I'm having many feelings over these two.

#tf nexus headcanon #ch: drift/deadlock #oc: roxana valiente

[reddus-sideblog]

This is a rather long post of me bitching about FFG and their approach to the 40KRPG, so it’s mostly me just venting my frustrations.

FFG’s work in writing about person scale 40K, and about the private sector in the Imperium, and just generally fleshing stuff is utterly under rated, and very unrecognized to the point that it does make me a bit sad when Citadel pretends that 90% of the setting is about Primaris Marines. There’s tons out there and just about everything featured in Dark Heresy, Rogue Trader, and so on is quite fleshed out to an amazing degree, or at the very least there’s enough implications for you to build off of in a meaningful capacity.

But then we come to FFG’s rules... I probably bitch about this nearly every day, or if not every other day when I’m working on the Liber Imperium, as I have yet to see any other game system be so obtuse and poorly laid out. Good luck making your own profiles for enemies and such, there is no clear advice on this and almost everything about enemy profiles is seemingly arbitrary. How much non-lethal damage can someone take? Not listed. Why do Plaguebearers not have Scholastic Lore (Numerology) in this version of their profile? But they do in a different one?

FFG is a company who refused, at all times, full stop, to EVER, EVER, reference previously published material of their own for the sake of consistency, and it makes all of these books feel utterly haphazard if you go in with a fine-toothed comb like I have to. II just get the feeling that FFG puts a lot of effort into writing and visuals and then kind of just handwaves the stats, rules, and numbers, which is VERY bothersome for a game system as complex and replete as 40KRPG seemingly aims to be. It’s the weirdest thing for a game that expects you to count your ammo, and has VERY little in terms of narrative mechanics for players to use outside of direct actions (ie very few Talents or whatever that let players affect the flow of a narrative, introduce previously undisclosed characters, and other things more narrative systems have), but then is just nowhere near as exacting in rules lawyer as it really, really needs to be for such a hard rules system.

I’d have to get into a lot more detail and intricacies to really explain my grievances, but as an anecdotal example:

In Black Crusade you get to pick an “Archetype” for your player character (these are essentially classes, or whatever you wanna call ‘em). In the Tome of Excess there is one for your character to be a Pirate Prince, which is really damn cool, and among your starting gear you get a voidship. What kind of voidship is it? How big is it? What state of repair is it in? HOW THE FUCK DO VOIDSHIPS EVEN WORK (Black Crusade has no voidship rules in it’s pages, and you would need to steal Rogue Traders rules)???

Instead you are greeted with this

Like....WHAT?? “btw this player character gets a voidship, have fun figuring that one out, GM lol” AAARGGGHHG FUCK OFF

[palimpsessed]

The Welsh Red Dragon, Kurt Vonnegut, and Social Activism

The inspiration behind Shepard’s pins

(original post with full artwork here.)

So, I spent A LOT of time thinking about the kind of pins our good friend Shepard (from Omaha, NE) would have on his denim jacket. Like a lot. Like an obsessive amount of time. I made a list, which seemed appropriate for this fandom. And because I’m a nerd and this sort of thing really interests me, and I’m proud of what I came up with, and because I think some of these items open up the possibility for some good, good literary analysis, I decided to make a whole post dedicated to Shepard’s pins. You’re welcome.

First, a little bit about my thought process. How did I decide what kind of pins to give Shepard? Well, he’s a guy full of stories. Stories that he can’t wait to tell anyone and everyone. And stories that others (mostly Maybes) have told him, once he’s earned their confidence. So, I wanted his pins to tell a story, his story in particular. What is the story that Shepard wants to tell about himself? More precisely, what is the story he wants to tell his new magickal friends on a disastrous summer holiday? The story is that of his own magickal credibility. His journey to magic (his come to Crowley moment, perhaps?) (I’d apologize, but I’m not sorry…) and his trustworthiness as evidenced by all of the Maybes he’s met along the way. He’s gotten drunk off dandelion wine with a creek dryad, given a toothbrush to a Sasquatch. spilled the tea with a jackalope, midwifed a centaur foal. Shep’s journey is just as impressive as Simon’s, and while Simon has been collecting notches on his dead dark creature bedpost (that’s a weird fucking metaphor…) (and now I’m thinking about dark creatures and Simon’s bedposts…so, you’re welcome, Basilton), Shep’s been collecting notches of the friendly variety. (Shoutout to @adamarks who did some super lovely analysis on Simon and Shep as mirrors here: https://adamarks.tumblr.com/post/188046272067/ok-so-when-shepard-said-he-was-cursed-the-first). So, I decided that I wanted to use Shep’s pins as a way to show the notches on his bedpost, so to speak. (Okay, I’m really losing this metaphor, but I think you’re still with me.)

Let’s dive in!

(I’m working my way down one side of his jacket at a time, for those following along at home.)

RIGHT SIDE

Welsh Dragon: I made this one very large, and easy to spot on his right shoulder. Of all of his accoutrements, this one felt like the most important. Mainly, because of Simon. Simon is, after all, half-Welsh. (The Mage, may he rest in pain, came to Watford from Wales.) And, of course, Simon, just like the Welsh Dragon, is a red dragon. (Or in the process of becoming one? Or a half-dragon? Or a dragon kitten?…) And the dragon that Simon and Baz fought on the Watford lawn, when they first worked together, and first shared magic, was a red dragon. Of course, the actual dragon in question here is Margaret. Shepard would absolutely have a pin to commemorate his friendship with her. And since I was going to give him a pin with a dragon, I knew I was going to have to use the Welsh Dragon because it would perfectly capture his burgeoning friendship with Simon, as well. Now, I want to go on a slight detour here (this blog post will be its own Odyssey) and talk more about the Welsh Red Dragon. I took the design for the pin from the Welsh flag, which is the thing that first made me think more about Simon’s Welsh connection. I’m not really making a point here, I just think it’s fascinating! There’s a lot of Welsh lore about the Red Dragon (and Margaret herself calls Simon “Great Red” - that ‘R’ is capitalized, by the way, so this seems to be a proper name for the kind of dragon that she thinks Simon is). Full disclosure, I am not Welsh and I am not a scholar on any of this by any means. That being said, a cursory, and super academic, perusal of the Wikipedia article on the Welsh Dragon led me to a few different history websites that linked the symbol of the red dragon with Merlin and King Arthur (son of Uther Pendragon, literally dragon head). Merlin, one of the most well-known magical figures and Arthur, one of the most well-known Chosen One figures in literary tradition. I know very little about Arthurian legend, and Welsh history, and dragon lore, though, so I’m going to just say, do a little research on your own when you’re bored and feeling nerdy!

Resist!: Shep is a young black man (and reasonable human being) living in the U.S. during the [redacted] Administration. I should hope this one is self-explanatory.

Hoover Dam: At some point in his visits to see Blue, I’m sure Shepard stopped off at the gift shop and bought himself a souvenir pin to mark the incredible experience he had making friends with an actual river. (This pin design is based on an actual souvenir pin of the Hoover Dam I found on Google Images—along with most of the other pin designs. I think it’s vintage, which just felt even more like Shepard to me, because he’s the kind of guy who would appreciate stuff that’s got a past.)

Deathly Hallows: I mean, IF the Harry Potter books/movies exist in the Simon Snow universe (which hasn’t been confirmed, as far as I know, by our Queen) I’m sure Shepard would have been totally into it as a kid, and probably would have found greater significance in its magical lore once he discovered that ACTUAL MAGIC EXISTS! So, he would have a pin to show his belief in the magickal world, and maybe also as a nostalgic reminder of when magic was still just something fictional he could turn to for escapism (and not something that would result in being cursed by a demon…).

The Truth is Out There: So, I know virtually nothing about The X-Files (my sister was obsessed with it to the point that she wanted to become a FBI agent for a few years, but I never watched it), but I’m sure Shepard is a fan. If nothing else, the sentiment is awfully apropos.

So It Goes: This one is very hard to see. It sort of looks like a black teardrop with a bar on top of it (it’s supposed to look like a bomb). The pin I based this off of reads “So It Goes”, which from my very superficial research, is a line repeated in Vonnegut’s anti-war novel Slaughterhouse-Five every time someone dies. I don’t know anything more about it, other than that it is a Kurt Vonnegut-inspired pin available for purchase on Etsy, and Shep mentions that he wanted to get a Vonnegut quote tattoo, even though “everybody has those.”

Green Alien Head: You will never be able to convince me that Shepard does not 10,000% believe in the existence of aliens. If he were still in the U.S. during the Area 51 Raid, I’m sure he would have stopped by, just, you know, for science…(I’m thinking he was probably still in the UK, but I guess we’ll see in AWTWB.)

Centaur: This one is also hard to see, but I took the design from a pin I found of one of the centaurs (the blue-haired, blue-bodied one, if that rings a bell for you) from Disney’s Fantasia. (Fun fact: I was super into Fantasia as a littlun, and I attribute my lifelong love for classical music in large part to the centaur sequence and my latent lesbianism—I mean, it was ludicrously erotic. Watch it sometime and tell me it would not make an impression on a sapphic three-year-old.) Midwifing a centaur foal was probably a very emotional and formative experience for Shepard. Buying this pin would be his way of remembering that experience, and the excitement and gratitude he likely felt to have been entrusted with that kind of acceptance from the centaur(s).

Jackalope: It doesn’t help that this pin is almost the same color as Shepard’s jacket, but it’s based off a design of a jackalope’s head that, again, I found on Google Image search (honestly, I don’t know how I ever made art without it). We know that Shepard once got some gossip from a jackalope, who vented to him about magicians calling “themselves ‘magicians’”, like “they’re the only ones with magic”. (This is totally irrelevant, but I always think of Americans when I read this. I am an American, by the way. America is a continent, but those of us living in the U.S. calls ourselves Americans, like everyone else living in America doesn’t matter.) Anyway, the jackalope offered Shepard some valuable insight into the political workings of the magickal world, so it gets its own pin.

LEFT SIDE

Pansexual Pride Flag Pin: I mean, technically, canonically, we don’t know what Shepard’s sexuality (or asexuality) is, but I just get some vibes from him. Plus, if we take him as a mirror for Simon (who is somewhere on the bi-plus spectrum), it’s not a far cry to imagine he also identifies somewhere on that spectrum.

Pentagram: This is another symbol that I chose based on my interpretation of Shepard’s character, and not so much on a Maybe or a story that he mentioned. The pentagram, or pentacle, is typically associated with the occult and witchcraft, which is something that could potentially also be said of Shep.

Sasquatch: You don’t go backpacking—or not backpacking—and introduce a Sasquatch to the benefits of dental hygiene without getting yourself a souvenir of the hike.

I [heart] Mystery Spot: The Mystery Spot is a weird sort of phenomenon in California (my home state). It’s a place outside the beach town of Santa Cruz that boasts of a “gravitational anomaly” on its website. I went once, years ago, and while you’re there, it can feel pretty convincing. (Also, I was probably like 10, so…) People outside of California will likely never have heard of this place, but driving around here (at least in the Bay Area, where I am, which isn’t that far from Santa Cruz) you’ll see yellow Mystery Spot bumper stickers on cars everywhere. I’m not really sure what the thing is with the bumper stickers. Like, I’m sure not that many people actually think it’s legit, and maybe it’s like one of those things that Californians just do (like freak out and forget how to drive when we feel water falling from the sky). But yeah, these bumper stickers are everywhere. Anyway, Shepard drives around a lot. He knows about the Vampires of Las Vegas (how is that not an indie rock band?) and the Katherine Hotel, and the Next Blood. So, he’s probably made it past Nevada and into California before. And while he was there, it’s not a great stretch of the imagination that someone who chases after magic wouldn’t wind up at a place called the Mystery Spot and get himself a pin while he was there. (And maybe even a bumper sticker.)

Black Power Fist: Unfortunately, this one is also hard to see, because the fist is black and I didn’t have anything to go over the outlines of the fingers with, which I sort of didn’t think about when I colored it. This one also feels self-explanatory. Shepard is black. Blackness has long been treated in itself as a crime by non-black members of law enforcement, and just the general racist population of the U.S. Young black men are especially vulnerable to racially motivated violence. I’m sure Shep, who drives all over the country by himself and gets into high speed chases at night in the middle of nowhere Nebraska while hunting super shifty rando Maybes has had a run-in or two. Stay safe, Shep!

Every Pronoun Belongs Here [Trans Pride Flag background]: Also, super hard to see because the letters are too small to read. I found this exact pin in a basket by the register at my local bookshop. (Support local bookshops, people!) They were being sold as a fundraiser for a LGBTQ club at one of the high schools, and I loved the idea that I could help them raise money and add this pin to my own growing collection to show off my support for trans rights. (Support trans rights and trans people, people!) I decided to give Shepard this same pin, because I could imagine him having an almost identical book buying experience in a dozen other towns that he’s probably visited. And I love the simplicity of the message, because it’s one of belonging, which EVERYONE is desperately seeking, no matter who they are or how they identify, and Shepard, and every character in this picture, is no exception. (Plus, it seemed like a cool way to connect my pin collection with Shep’s. Maybe I should have mentioned the fact that I’m also a pin person at the beginning? I walk to work and on my lunch breaks, so I carry all of my stuff in a backpack. And I proudly display my random pin collection on my backpack. Including several Simon Snow-related pins.)

Don’t Panic: This was based off a Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy pin. I don’t really know anything about the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (including if it’s okay to abbreviate it as HGG? THGTTG? whatever), even though I did watch the movie years back when it was on TV and I still lived with my parents who had a TV. But the sentiment felt appropriate, and Shepard is a sort of magickal hitchhiker. Apart from managing to hold down a job at Dick Blick, he appears to lead a somewhat nomadic lifestyle. He tells Penny, “the road is my teacher”, and if that’s not a hitchhiker slogan, I don’t know what is. (Ass, gas, or grass?)

Black Lives Matter: They do. Just sayin’.

Magic Troll Doll: When I was growing up, the Troll doll was all the (nightmare-inducing) rage. Trolls are one of those magickal creatures that are continually mentioned in the series. Shepard talks about lonely trolls under bridges. Simon talks about killing trolls. Agatha would rather kiss a troll. And Baz was kidnapped by numpties, who are sort of like trolls. I couldn’t not include a troll. And the Troll doll specifically felt perfect, because the full name was Magic Troll Doll. You can bet if Shepard had to pick a troll-related pin, it would be a magic(k)al one.

[Asshole]: This is another Kurt Vonnegut pin. It looks like a messily drawn asterisk (*), but it’s actually meant to be an asshole (taken from the preface of Vonnegut’s novel Breakfast of Champions, and drawn by Vonnegut himself). I just thought, why the fuck not? So, here. Have an asshole pin. (I should have put it on a buttonhole…)

HONOURABLE MENTION

Shepard’s Phone Case: Remember that line I quoted earlier, about Shep wanting to get a Vonnegut quote tattoo? Well, when I was trying to figure out what to put on his phone case, I thought that seemed like a reasonable place to start. So, I googled Vonnegut quotes, to see if I could find one that I thought Shepard would like. Here’s the quote: “a purpose of human life, no matter who is controlling it, is to love whoever is around to be loved.” I just loved that for Shepard.

#shepard #from omaha #hi im shepard #im from omaha nebraska #my art #headcanons #carry on fanart #simon snow series #carry on #wayward son #any way the wind blows #rainbow rowell #simon snow #tyrannus basilton grimm pitch #agatha wellbelove #baz pitch #penny bunce #are not in this but i'm tagging them anyway #random british spellings for no reason #penelope bunce

[matymatsu]

Hey :> Could you give us some Jett Headcanons based on her "your're not better than me" line ingame, maybe some backstory since riot won't give us any lore... Pretty please? Have a great day!

So basically just pour my insecurities into this character... You got it, fam

I see Jett as someone who is very insecure. I mentioned in her first headcanon post that she has an older brother she looks up to, I feel like that would fuel some of it. She sees him as this beacon that can do no wrong and is good at everything, while everything she tries, she ends up failing at. At the end of the day, she really just wants to make him proud.

Her insecure thoughts mostly amount to her not feeling worthy to have her powers, as well as her own abilities, that she would be a useless nobody without them. 

She doesn’t want to be seen as weak, not even for a second. She wants people to know that she can hold herself out there. That’s why, even with those thoughts eating her, she refuses to go seek medical help. To her, it’s a show of weakness. (On a side note, don’t be like Jett. Seek a therapist)

Despite being super playful with the other agents, she doesn’t have any real friends. She likes to keep everyone at a safe distance, and thus, has no one to really vent to. She just bottles it up cause she feels like she has no choice.

The only people she really talks to is her dad and older brother, and she’d be damned to let them figure out her mental state. The last thing she needs is their pity.

#Got all my asks done we love to see it uwu #Valorant #Jett #Jett Valorant #ask #headcanon talk #sorry if this was a bit of a downer