#varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

if you lay down on a fallen tree in the woods on a windy afternoon and look up to the sky where the clouds chase each other you will, after some time, not be so sure anymore who is really moving: the clouds, or you and the trees and the whole world. maybe i will spend my whole life trying to figure out who is moving.

varacai

#poetry #writeblr #poets on tumblr #spilled ink #excerpt from a book i'll never write #excerpts from my mind #poets of tumblr #quotes #words #spilled words #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

catchingreleasing >>>>> novosonce

in honor of zalagasper. please interact if you see this

#url change #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

last night i dreamed about a boy.

when i entered the room he was about to climb out a window. i was scared he'd fall and grabbed his arm and wrist.

he slowly turned his head towards me and said, "where were you earlier? you left me alone."

#spilled words #spilled ink #one time i dreamt #dreams #poetry #if you want to know; the 'boy' i dreamt of is zhu zanjin #i don't think i'll ever forget this. it was so eerie #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

white noise in my brain

i need to get up

i need to get up

i'm not ok

i need to get up

i need to get up

let me scream

i need to get up

i need to get up

stomach empty

i need to get up

i need to get up

dry throat

white noise in my head

#depression #adhd #mental illness #mentally ill #poetry #words #spilled words #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

if the soul leaves its body when we die

why is it trapped there for all its life

(why can't I break out)

#poetry #writeblr #spilled words #spilled ink #spilled thoughts #death tw #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

i’m texting with my crush and i’ve been struggling to find an emoji that fits and it just hit me that the uniqueness of the loving gaze on my face just cannot be captured in one tiny stylized emoji and i think that’s beautiful

#love #crush suggestion #sweet crush #crush #emotions #relationship #love quotes #quotes #life #spilled ink #m tag #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

isn’t it oh so telling that even in my daydreams i am left behind by the people i love

#apparently my brain cannot be trusted #sigh #daydreamerpeople #love #spilled ink #spilled words #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

sometimes i’m angry about how un-perfect i am

about the holes that need to be sealed

the seeds to be sown for flowers to grow

the rain to be poured to make rivers flow

about the wounds that need to be healed

sometimes i’m angry about how un-satisfied i am

about the cuts that left me with scars even though

i’ve planted trees in them that bloom in spring

i’ve dug wells in them where birds would sing

sometimes i’m angry about the beauty i can’t appreciate because

i’m angry sometimes about how un-perfect i am

#poetry #i wrote this a looong time ago and it sounded awful but now i'm kinda satisfied-ish with it! #writeblr #spilled words #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

my crush's friend just asked me out on a date (?) what fuck what the fuck what the f-

#I'm. spiraling #about #personal #cherries #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

sharing!! it's all about sharing moments. like, one of my favorite posts I've written is the one where we share a cigarette. and now I'm sitting on my bed just after waking up, realizing that my neighbor got up at the same time

#words #spilled words #love #love quotes #since when have I become a romantic #cigarette #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

oh, if only I knew how to take care of you

#words #spilled words #love #love quotes #writeblr #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

and with every second that brings me closer to seeing you again i miss you more

#writeblr #spilled words #m tag #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

you slit me open from top to toe

so I could bleed

and bleed out these poisoned feelings

and heal.

#writeblr #spilled words #poetry #my chemical romance #tagging this mcr bc this is about their music ❤️ #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

“just be yourself” yes ok but do you ever feel like you’re trying too hard? focusing so hard on being honest about yourself that you specifically highlight your flaws because you’re afraid of accidental false advertisement?

#existential thoughts #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

don't let me dive too deep into your soul

you're not ready for me to drown inside of you

#poetry #love #longing #words #spilled words #dark #varacai.txt

[dostoevskaja]

and i’m still hungover from the moment i had to say good-bye to you.

#don't mind me haha i'm fine #i just might have developed a little crush on this g i r l #poetry #emotions #varacai.txt