#when you draw turtles instead of going to therapy

[purplepixel]

Dont worry y’all, he’s not dead.

Its been exactly one year since I made this. This was the first animatic I made with rise. Technically a repost from twitter, since i wasnt on tumblr when i made this. I held off posting here when I did make the switch bc…reasons. Its kinda weird looking back on this animatic. Its somewhat of a time capsule for me bc THIS IS 100% PROJECTION. I made this one afternoon in response to what was going on in my life at the time. Draw your feelings to cope and all that jazz. I wanted to reshare this bc 1) archiving reasons 2) show how much ive improved from this 3) ok maybe i still think i did a good job with it and 4) Im ready to share part 2 that ive kept hidden for an entire year. Nobody has seen the follow up animatic. Not even my bestie. It’ll give more context to this animatic, but i also like the idea of this one standing on its own and that anyone can interpret it however they like.

Oh hey, this was my first time animating in procreate as well? Back when i didnt know you could use group layers to animate in procreate HA.

Part 1 | Part 2

#will drop part 2 six days from now in honor of the time it took to complete that animatic #everyones getting uploaded on their anniversary completion date #in case anyones wondering since i gave no context #my situation last year was not tragic and everyone is fine #i just was feeling emotions #and was surprised pikachu face over it #when you draw turtles instead of going to therapy #pixels tortle art #pixels animations #rottmnt fanart #rottmnt #rise donnie #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt animation #tmnt #rottmnt animatic #donnie

[nerves-nebula]

Sorry for the uh. Incoming word vomit.

I think your au has rotted my brain a tiny little bit. While i was reorganizing my closet yesterday (which also included taking the doors off) literally all i could think about was write neglected fic in german you know you want to you know you could do some things there you know you should write neglected fanfiction and integrate all these phrases popping into your head. No we’re not letting you work on any of your other stuff but how about you write neglected - and on and on and on. All this from like. One pm to midnight when i finally went to sleep after all. I am very surprised i didn‘t dream about it (because i think that may have happened before! I sometimes get moments of my brain not remembering the annoying noise waking me up is my alarm on my phone and instead making up wild shit it is instead. Like i remember hearing that noise and Just being like, oh shit, the lesbian horse commune! I have literally no idea what this meant, but anyway one of those turned into a weird thing where i thought it was a timer and i remember the thought “it’s fine, they’re just teen boys, they just need therapy quickly” (or something along those lines. Just much less coherent) and i am reasonably certain that was about that just from what i remember from my dream beforehand) and yeah. Successfully infected me :D

this is hilarious, thanks for sharing with me hah. sometimes this is what its like with me too, i'll wake up and go to class and all i wanna do is draw my damn turtles.

the lesbian horse commune!

man, I'm always saying this tbh. I get it.

also if you wrote a fic i would read it, even if i had to put it through google translate or something i WILL consume fanart/fic like my life depends on it.

#nnstuff #ask #asks are sweethearts #teenage mutant neglected turtles

[ray-the-fanatic]

gave april, casey and karai redesigns in my au, via picrew cuz my drawing skills are still a wip, for fun vibe purposes

for april:

- made april's skin have a pink tint to fit her kraang origins (i also think it fits her character design)

- gave her heterochromia, her right eye is blue-ish gray while her left is dark green (again to fit her kraang origins), i always felt her n mikey's colors were too similar so i made her eyes more distinct

- her hair is more dark strawberry blonde-ish than red cuz i actually like the concept art of her being blonde

- i was torn between giving her braided pigtails or a pixie cut, in the end i stuck with the pixie cut as a homage to one of her concept designs and also cuz short hair april is a look™

- her clothing is more diverse, she still has her number 1 shirt but she changes styles from time to time depending on her mood (me fr)

- she's basically the plucky, fun loving big sis/aunt but will not hesitate calling out anyone's bs (esp her little bro's) and definitely wrecks any bad guys' shit. she's also kind of a snarky brat when it comes to the lesser villains and i love it lol

for casey:

- made casey's skin tone somewhat similar to his 03 incarnation but more distinct

- gave him dark brown eyes, i noticed there wasn't a lot of brown eyed characters in the 12 series so i took it as an opportunity

- poofier hair. i know casey's a rowdy boy but i feel like fluffy-messy hair fits him better both character wise and aesthetically wise

- also longer hair cuz he deserves it (he still has the bandana to keep his hair from getting in his eyes)

- he's a hockey player and a vigilante so he's got bandaged wounds along with cuts, bruises and scars galore, makes him feel scruffy y'know?

- short sleeve hoodie with flames (that still has spray paint marks) and cut jeans is this boy's clothing, he absolutely doesn't care abt his sense of style imo

- he's still a chaotic menace wanting to provide justice ™, just looks more scrappy and is an uncle now (he's also hispanic, fun hc)

for karai:

- tanner skin tone, she also has a more hooked nose shape and love it

- gave her red eyes instead of gold cuz it works for her, it also connects her with splinter (and donnie on some level)

- much like casey, her hair is bit longer n fluffier just styled somewhat similarly to her hair in canon, minus the bangs

- she has a different hair color on her streaks/to the roots instead of underneath, tho wasn't feeling the gold blonde so i made it white instead, it goes well with her eyes tbh (i made her sides and eye shadow white as a homage to her snake form but mostly cuz in my au instead of getting mutated she becomes heavily imprisoned and her sides turn white due to stress... did i mention this au gets angsty?)

- she has massive scars, she's been fighting since she was a kid so she's bound to have plenty of them, they're more visible than casey's tho and she's got a lot on her back as well

- for her non-battle ready clothes, she's mostly got a biker chick sorta style but on the clamer days she wears tank tops and black yoga pants, just a casual badass

- misguided antagonist turned big sister/aunt who's still processing her trauma just more healthier, therapy via baby turtle nephews. she's still cunning n sneaky just without the misguidedness. she also loves to spite her former villain allies, tiger claw esp

sorry this got long winded, just wanted to share my redesign n i got carried away with the explanations, i also gave everyone piecings cuz again... self indulgence 😅

Okay first off sorry for taking a bit to get to this be toed up with work and I wanted to give this a good read over when I saw the length cause I llve what you tell me for this fic ;3;

April:

I love the idea of her having some pink in her skin tone to allude to her being part krangg I loke the shorter hair as well mostly cause I enjoy the short hair style look I lole your idea for a strawberry blond in color cause in the concepts she was going to be blonde at one point. I think tje desing fits well for her personality idk but she got those cool aunt vibes to me xD

Caesy:

I love that you kept his brown eye. Maybe cause I have brown eyes but I love brown eye charayers cause brown eyes are very underrated u_u also love bringing back his skin tone from 03 ;3; and him being Hispanic yes look I'm Latina give me the rep!! I also see casey being Latino any way xD personal headcannon btws. So I enjoy when others put him as Latino or Hispanic;3; and I llve his look it fits casey has his own style and gotta stick to it uwu

Karai:

I love her;3; I like the white hair stripes though over tje blonde idk I feel it works better with her look and the homages to her snake mutation also yes give the angst I love angst 👀

#ask box #i just love all of this!!!

[curlsofsagesmoke]

TMNT (2012) characters as dysfunctional family roles

here I go again analyzing a kids show that ended four years ago. anyway, I saw a tiktok by user doinbigthink where they gave a quick overview of the six kinds of dysfunctional family roles, and I immediately thought of tmnt bc it’s my current hyperfixation. so I spent almost an hour doing research and writing up this analysis, as one does.

as a preface: dysfunction in a family can be caused by anything from someone struggling with addiction to a parent being abusive or unavailable/neglectful to someone having narcissistic personality disorder (npd) etc. etc. Usually there is one person who is the root cause of this (very deep seated) dysfunction and the others in the family (often the kids) fall into these roles in order to cope.

Leo: The Hero

The Hero is often the oldest child. They cope with the dysfunction in the family by being high achievers or perfectionists, and they need a sense of control in order to feel safe within the family. They are seen as very well-adjusted, balanced, and high-functional and are often used as an example of how well the family as a whole is doing. They may allow this misconception to continue (whether consciously or unconsciously) in order to hide the family’s problems. They may be parentified as children (that is, forced to take on a parental role for their younger siblings) and usually feel a lot of pressure to solve the family’s issues. With Leo in particular, you see these two behaviors in the way he approaches leading his brothers as well as the way he obsessed over bringing Karai into the family for Splinter’s sake after discovering her true identity. As an adult, the Hero is often drawn toward romantic partners who are emotionally unavailable (again, see Leo’s crush on Karai) and tend to throw themselves into their work (Leo’s obsession with ninjutsu)

Leo: The Golden Child

The Golden Child is not a dysfunctional family role but instead describes a relationship that develops between a parent/guardian with npd and one of the children in the family. In these cases, the parent tends to favor the Golden Child because the Golden Child exhibits all the traits the parent loves in themselves. In Splinter and Leo’s case, these characteristics are their devotion to ninjutsu, their general temperaments, and their more spiritual/mystic natures. There are MANY examples of this favoritism in TMNT canon; for example, Splinter teaching Leo his reiki technique (the healing hands) in “the deadly venom” because everyone things Leo is the most capable of learning such an advanced technique (in the episode, Donnie says that he doesn’t think anyone else on the team could’ve done what Leo did, i.e. using the healing hands on himself and saving the others from karai). The parent has a volatile relationship with the Golden Child and often their love is conditional (that is, the parent will favor the Golden Child as long as the Golden Child continues to act like the parent). Because of this, the Golden Child often has trouble establishing an independent identity (see: Raph calling Leo “Splinter Jr.”, though I can’t remember if this happens in 2012 or just in the 2003 version). The Golden Child may also participate in the narcissistic parent’s abuse against the other children in order to protect themself (this is less explicit in canon, but I think that Leo’s leadership style fits this bill)

Raph: The Scapegoat

The Scapegoat is often the second child. As the name suggests, they are often blamed for things that go wrong in the family regardless of whether it was actually their fault or not. Scapegoats are often very aware of their position in the family and as a result they may feel rejected, isolated, and unlovable. I think a good example of Raph feeling like this is the fact that, early in the show, he only openly expresses his emotions to Spike. Scapegoats learn that negative attention is better than no attention (especially from a parent/guardian) and they often engage in high risk behaviors such as sex, drugs, etc. (in Raph’s case, his reckless fighting style and the way he seeks out fights, and this also explains his temper and overall angry demeanor). Because of this, they tend to get into a lot of trouble and are often singled out as the child who needs individual help (aka therapy) even though the root problems lie with the family as a unit. In cases where the parent has npd the Scapegoat is often pitted against the Golden Child. This is called splitting and it is another way to distract from the family’s deeper issues. I feel like I don’t need to explain the way that Leo and Raph are pitted against each other.

Donnie: The Lost Child

The Lost Child, as the name implies, often fades into the background. Usually this is on purpose in an effort to keep themself safe, as they might be scared to draw attention to themself or rock the boat, especially in an abusive household. They may often feel ignored or neglected and are often described as loners who have difficulty developing social skills or self-esteem. Like the Hero, the Lost Child is often used as an example of the family’s stability and success because they aren’t causing trouble. They tend to struggle when forming friendships/romantic relationships, and they are usually praised for not needing a lot of attention/being independent. Because of this, they feel safer when they’re by themselves. Although Donnie does cause trouble sometimes (see: all the times he’s blown some shit up in the lab, the Mutagen man thing, etc.), he’s not seen as the troublemaker. Raph (and Mikey, to a certain extent) definitely takes that title. Donnie is often alone in his lab---working, admittedly, but he still tends to isolate himself, and he is often seen as the most socially awkward of the brothers (see: his relationship with April). There’s also this very interesting exchange from the episode “Enemy of My Enemy” when they’re in the Shellraiser and Leo is about to take the stealth bike to help Karai:

Raph: Hey, the stealth bike’s my thing. Leo: Now your thing is sucking it up. Donnie: Hey! That’s my thing!

Mikey: The Mascot

The Mascot is often the youngest child. They use humor and goofiness to diffuse tension and distract the family from their issues, though when this works, they feel increased pressure to continue to step in when things become tense or volatile. The Mascot acts from a place of anxiety and trauma, and they may have bouts of depression. They also tend to feel as though they cannot express their negative emotions (because they often see themselves as responsible for their family’s happiness). They tend to bend over backwards for people with little regard for their own safety/comfort, and they are drawn to intense and dysfunctional relationships (whether romantic or platonic) where they will be called upon to diffuse tension. This can be seen in the way Mikey approached his friendships with both Bradford (pre-mutation) and Leatherhead. Mikey is also very rarely shown as being sad, angry, or depressed the way that the other three are, and it’s only in times of extreme emotional distress (like the season two finale) where he drops his humor. Even in the midst of tough battles or tough situations, Mikey tends to insert himself into the middle of the tension and is almost constantly cracking jokes or trying to keep things lighthearted. When he does show more negative emotions, it’s in (mostly) one of two ways. One, giving comfort or seeking comfort, usually from Raph (again see the season two finale, where he hugs Raph to calm him down after Splinter “dies” and seeks comfort from Raph in the Party Wagon as they’re driving away from the city). Two, acting combative with Donnie.

Note: Mikey and Donnie acting combative

This second one in particular is really interesting to me because both Donnie and Mikey exhibit a level of comfort/feeling safe with each other that they don’t display with the other two. Mikey only ever gets physical with Donnie (their little slap fight in “Turtle Temper” or attacking him at the end of “The Creeping Doom”), while Donnie only ever purposefully antagonizes Mikey to get a reaction (slapping him in “Turtle Temper”, which prompts the slap fight, or teasingly insulting him at the end of “The Creeping Doom”, which prompts Mikey to attack him). Mikey likes to get under Raph’s skin, but he never retaliates when Raph gets physical with him. Donnie does occasionally argue with Raph and Leo, but usually backs down after Raph threatens him with violence (see “New Girl in Town”), and with Leo it never escalates past a verbal fight (see the season two finale, “the fourfold trap”). Actually, it seems that in Mikey’s and Donnie’s relationship, they take on the roles that you usually see in Raph’s and Mikey’s relationship. Mikey antagonizes Raph and Raph retaliates; similarly, Donnie antagonizes Mikey and Mikey retaliates, but neither of them would act this way toward their other two brothers.

Splinter: The Root of the Dysfunction

I’ve made a lot of allusions by now to Splinter having npd, or at least some narcissistic tendencies. There are many times where he shows favoritism toward Leo or acts in a very stubborn or even self-absorbed manner. In the season one finale, for example, he refuses to help the turtles fight and only leaves the lair after april is kidnapped by the shredder. In “the pulverizer returns”, he makes the turtles switch weapons (for literally no good reason), they almost die in a fight and switch back, and as punishment, he takes their weapons away entirely; this isn’t addressed in the episode, but i do believe that if they’d had their weapons, they could’ve prevented timothy from being mutated in this episode. (Admittedly there are times when he apologizes, admits he’s wrong, and changes his mind, which is why I hesitate to say he exhibits fully narcissistic behaviors). There’s also the physical aspect of their relationship. He’s teaching the turtles ninjutsu, so you can expect a very physical relationship in the form of training, but there are times when he causes the turtles pain for the sake of pain as punishment (e.g. randori, which we see a few times, or when he goes for their pressure points, or when he trips mikey in the episode “monkey brains”, or when he stabs raph with his cane in the episode “turtle temper”, and these are just the examples i can think of off the top of my head). There has been discourse in the fandom about whether these characters (splinter and raph in particular) are abusive, and i don’t want to get into that. However, i think it’s undeniable that splinter raised his kids with the intent to turn them into child soldiers, and also i fully believe that this (plus his parenting style) is the root of the dysfunction in the hamato family.

#I cannot believe I spent 45 minutes researching dysfunctional family roles and writing this up #anyway #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt 2012 #leonardo #michelangelo #donatello #raphael #splinter #Leo 2012 #donnie 2012 #Raph 2012 #Mikey 2012 #splinter 2012 #analysis

[idw-sonic-fan-blog]

The Belle Problem

I do not dislike Belle the Tinkerer. In fact, I am quite ambivalent towards her. Of all the characters, Belle is the weakest and I can understand people actively disliking her but realize that I am not in the camp that equates the character to Chris Thorndyke, Princess Elise, and Sally Acorn.

1. Belle’s origin arc is overbearing and overwritten

At the time of writing, Belle has been the main focus of 10 straight issues. 10 straight issues of just figuring out her backstory through exposition.

This wouldn’t be so bad if these moments weren’t so misaligned in how it told them. When we meet Belle, she is in a derelict Eggman base. Now I may be alone in this thinking, but it wasn’t immediately apparent to me that she was a robot. To me, she was a puppet and it’s not even thing to consider or immediately assume she was anything else until both Sonic and Tails spilled the beans that she was a robot of sorts.

The leap from puppet to badnik that Sonic made kind of put me in thinking that Belle was something Eggman made which is not a connection I would have figured out myself immediately because Belle doesn’t resemble anything Eggman has ever created.

In my head, I thought it was a completely different doctor like Starline made her, but that is never considered. Instead, the comic narrative insisted that Eggman must have made her which becomes the easiest mystery ever solved for an origin. It was patently obvious right after the second issue of her debut that Mr. Tinker made her. But instead of nipping it in the bud when it basically spelled it out for the audience, the comic draws it out for a few more issues.

This was 7 issues after her debut. Even if it weren’t for the pandemic, drawing out a mystery whose answer to it is obvious for 7 months at least is annoying. It’s like Blues Clues or Blaze the Monster Machines level of treatment the audience’s intelligence. And yes, this is a comic targeted at children, but I reiterate those audiences I’ve brought up can’t even read. And child demographic is not an excuse for non-compelling writing especially since IDW staff has done that kind of origin reveal that didn’t placate to a perceived lowest common denominator with characters like Whisper and currently with Starline.

Reward viewers for paying attention and figuring it out. Not punish them by drawing the answer out.

And also, how the chose to reveal her backstory is misaligned.

Instead of having Belle talk about it and some arbitrary conversation, why not just go back to that village with Belle in tow and we get to see how the village treats her. And this should have happened much earlier than the eventual reveal that she is Mr. Tinker’s creation. There are several ways to do this like the Restoration gets a request from that village for assistance and Belle goes because that is what she is good at. Then we see how they regard her and characters like Whisper, Jewel, Tangle and Lanolin supervise this and wonder what the deal is. You give people pieces of the puzzle, not essentially finish most of the puzzle for them. Set up some red herrings along the way. But instead, we just get dragged along.

2. Belle is a relic of an annoying plot device

Mr. Tinker is a bit of an issue for Eggman fans. Fans don’t necessarily like that Eggman’s character is treated like he isn’t essentially different from his amnesiac personality or they are the same person. The issue comes from Sonic’s insistence that Eggman could be like Mr. Tinker and fans misreading that as if the narrative is saying that Sonic is blaming Eggman for not being Mr. Tinker. Belle doesn’t help because, not only does she not accept that Eggman and Tinker are and the same, it becomes this father/daughter dynamic for a character that wasn’t his normal self upon his conception of her. It’s like if you lost your memories and identity but you continue to live your life regardless and you have a child under this alterego. You get your memories back and your identity, but you have a kid now. And now the world is blaming you for not being the person who you were when you weren’t mentally stable. Sure, the kid never asked to be made but technically you never were in the right mind to make her.

It gets iffy. And sympathy for Belle gets tied to this and it just makes Eggman feel culpable and a deadbeat father. This is not to say that Belle isn’t unsympathetic because it is definitely sad but you can’t say Starline was in the wrong for treating Dr. Eggman through shock therapy. But again, so did the village. They tried to rehab Eggman too so it’s not like they just exploited him.

It’s complicated and done fans don’t like the complication at all.

3. Belle is overly prevalent

It’s bordering on spot light stealing and she is becoming a IDW’s version of Geoff. 10 straight issues of focus. That is more focus than any character has gotten consecutively. Even in issues where Belle isn’t part of the main narrative, she is part of the overarching plot. In comparison, Tangle and Whisper got the opposite treatment in spite of being massively more popular. They just sporadically appear now and days. If the Restoration is involved, they are there. Neither character has been involved in more than 5 straight issues. Belle is already set to appear and be the focus of 11. And before you say Starline, he has the excuse because he is a main antagonist if not the main antagonist of IDW and even he hasn’t overtaken the comic as much as Belle.

All in all, fans need a break from the character or else she will be reviled as much as Tommy the Turtle.

#sonic the hedgehog #idw sonic #idw sonic the hedgehog #belle the tinkerer

[strongerthanafork]

Introduction Page!

Hello ladies, gents, and everyone in between, I'm Aster! Welcome to my fanfiction and brain rot page (mostly Mobius content). Some fun facts about me are *drumroll*:

18 yo. (my birthday is in May)

Non-binary, Bisexual here! (they/them or sometimes he/him is preferred.)

I'm going into my first year of college in the fall (oh lord).

My favorite color is either black or pink. It's a tie. (I know two different ends of the spectrum)

I graduated high-school this year (2021)

I work at cRAckEr BArrEL in the little shop they have at the front. (it's quite fun ngl. I get payed $10 an hour sometimes thats not enough to deal with ppl's shit and sustain how much I spend.)

I've only had one other job and it was at Kohl's (good lord that place gives me bad dreams).

I have like 4 friends and they all live at least 45 min+ from me same with online friends. (I'm lonely give me attention.)

I live in Texas were it's as hot as the Devil's anus iykyk. It's usually around 90 degrees on a regular basis. They all of a sudden it will be 2 degrees in the middle of spring. (Don't move here -1/10 do not recommend.)

It took my three ½ years to get my official driver's license and when I did it expired without me knowing and I drove with an expired license for a month. (BUT, I didn't get pulled over!)

I'm a SSB™  (simp since birth). I simp for a number of fictional characters such as, Mobius (that's obvious), Geralt of Rivia, Will Graham, Loki, Obi-Wan Kenobi (that one's slightly embarrassing), and others I don't remeber atm.

I have only started to gain confidence to post what I write on here. I will be making a request page for you guys to make requests on.

I've been writing fanfiction since I was a wee little 12 year old. Yes, I know, gross. I was really into Doctor Who fanfiction at that time. I wrote everything on paper cuz I didnt have a phone. (My parents found it recently. I almost "yeeted" myself out a window.)

I love frogs, rats, mice, and turtles (basically any goblincore-ish animal).

The energy I give off is bascially chaotic mentally-ill simp™.

I honestly would write for a living but nobody gets paid enough to write fanfiction .

So instead I'm a visual arts major but that's to be determined.

All of my tiktoks are cringy, change my mind.

I was obsessed with mermaids as a kid, as all children 2015 were. I even made potions and a fake mermaid tail. I was committed, okay?

I'm a 2003 baby in case anyone was wondering.

I have a few hobbies including: art (drawing, learning digital art and painting), music (listening and singing), being in nature, collecting random things in the woods (bonez), watching TV, social media (?), driving around, shopping (rETAIL THERAPY), fashion/makeup/hair, reading (occasionally), and of course writing.

Gator Loki is superior (I love u gator loki 😤)

Single since 2003 🤞🏻(someone PLZ end my suffering (jk)).

I'm the bitch that barks at people who make me 🌌uncomfy🌌.

I will be your partner in crime if asked. (Also will be your bestie)

My sense of humor is horrifyingly unfunny.

Wanna lie under the stars and watch marvel movies on a projector screen 🌟outside🌟?

I'm horribly shy and introverted in person.

Don't worry, I'll get on your nerves by asking if I'm annoying and saying sorry every five seconds.

People say I give good advice 🤷🏻?

So I think that's all. I may add more. Can you tell I'm a chaotic writer?

If you want to follow me on other platforms here are my usernames:

tiktok: aster2305

instagram: aster.leee

(those are the only two I use frequently but if you don't feel comfy adding me on either, you can always pm me here and I'll be glad to talk!)

I love all of you dudes that support my writing and I hope you're day is fantastic! 🤍

#introduction #mobius #fandom #fanfic #loki series #loki laufeyson #mobius x reader #writing #introvert

[ganymedesclock]

Kept meaning to draw more Dead Cells headcanons but w/e so I’m writing them instead.

Prisoner

Does not have clean pretty Hollywood amnesia nearly as much as he remembers everything pre-losing his head technically but in practice, unreliably and wandering too far into memories he can’t ground with more recently observed evidence is just going through a fever dream of what he’s pretty sure maybe probably actually happened at some point.

Related to above he has a breathtaking command of information he has no idea how he learned or from whom.

One time he spent an entire fairly prolonged loop with a particularly bawdy sea shanty stuck in his head and to this day he is not sure if he completely made it up but probably not because he didn’t even know half of those terms were used euphemistically. 

Amenable to most pronouns, but mostly he’d just really like it if someone actually asked.

Overall is just in rough shape. Some of the alterations to his clothing are that he lost a concerning amount of weight prior to his ‘loop reset state’ and used scraps of cloth to tie his shirt and pants on. 

If he could talk and had anybody besides Mushroom Boi to hang out with, would absolutely be the kind of guy where you’re lying in bed half-awake and he says some shit like “do we know factually that swans aren’t just an elaborate hoax” and then you spend the next hour wide awake and angry furiously wracking your brain for the last time you personally saw a swan.

Can pull his fire head close enough to press at his neck stub which basically looks like he turtles inside his scarf

Trying really hard to be cool and unaffected by the dying repeatedly thing and mostly succeeds unless it’s been happening a lot lately.

At any given moment is about three good shoves from an emotional breakdown but the other people in the loop virtually never catch him at it. Basically his psychological state is like looking at a precariously but very strategically balanced bookshelf where the longer you look at it the more upsetting it is that it’s still standing and yet somehow.

Mushroom Boi helps

Mushroom Boi

Has the approximate level of sapience of an abnormally smart dog. Could carry simple conversations if given some kind of proxy to communicate through and the training to use it.

Really unusual compared to the Jerkshrooms whose instinct to kneecap people is hampered by a general fear of anything larger than them that isn’t a Yeeter. Mushroom Boi inexplicably fears nothing. They will headbutt the Hand of the King. They will headbutt the Giant. If given a clear path to their target they would headbutt the gods.

In fact has less fear than Prisoner “haha YOLO” McHeadless which can lead to some interesting results.

Part of the weirdness is them being a lab-grown and human-socialized specimen but also they actually had a surprisingly decent relationship with the researcher responsible for synthesizing them, though the Alchemist took ownership of the project because said researcher went the way of, well, almost everyone else on the island.

They’re coherent enough to wonder what happened to him sometimes.

Keyed decently to Prisoner’s emotional states even when he hides it and has genuinely therapy-mushroomed him off a panic attack at least once.

Y’know that thing in the RE2 remake where Mr. X will kill you faster if you shoot his hat off? Mushroom Boi will do that about their bow. Which is impressive since this is not a superweapon but instead an approximately toddler-sized mushroom.

Sometimes it seems like they might be in the process of figuring out how to use knives and Prisoner is really not sure what emotion he’s supposed to feel but he sure feels it with great intensity.

Time Keeper

She keeps the winding key for the clocktower close to heart by which I mean it’s physically inside her chest. Good news is nobody can sneeze weirdly in the island’s time loop without her knowing about it. Bad news is her way of knowing is unpleasant. The worse news is the deterioration of the loop is partially because an essential and irreplaceable part of the clock has been playing a long losing game against crushing amounts of fatigue and said essential part is her.

Y’know every time she resets the loop or rewinds to avoid a boss fight? Yeah. That sensation sucks a lot and sorta feels like deliberately inducing arrhythmia in yourself.

Doesn’t get sleep she gets results except if she is dead honest god she yearns for eight uninterrupted hours but also that is a luxury she can’t afford. Too disciplined and perfectionist to be a shirker but if she ever gets an actual practical opportunity to be well-rested she might cry a little. 

Not from the island originally; came from a very long ways away, for reasons she has not explained to anyone. At least, as far as anybody knows. the Crypt Keeper isn’t telling.

Three of the alt temporal outfits are places she lived (volcano, jungle, desert) or traveled through coming here. She’s originally from the desert.

Dead-on-her-feet exhausted most of the time. This can mean she comes off as an unstoppable and unnervingly calm terminator who might acknowledge belatedly that she’s just gotten stabbed after she’s tossed you across the room with one of her many, many giant heavy swords, and it can mean sometimes if she’s having a really bad loop she just walks into a closed door, stops, and stays there for a while.

This isn’t a headcanon I just want to point out that she’s canonically more jacked than HotK because Prisoner picks up and wields HotK’s symmetrical lance, but in the optional lore room where you find all of Time Keeper’s swords, Prisoner notes they’re too heavy for him to use.

Prisoner, signing, terrified “Do I weigh anything to you?” Time Keeper, “no it’s like holding a couple of grapes”

She used to have a rigorous workout routine but nowadays who needs that when you’re endlessly surrounded by the living dead, right.

#Dead Cells #readmore #body horror

[arolla-pine]

I, Marinette - p.8

(8) – The Miracle Box

That was unbelievable! I’d just started feeling comfortable as Marinette! And now I had to start all over again?!

“Bugaboo?” Ladybug asked me tenderly, kneeling by my side.

“Woah… That was totally unexpected…” I sighed staring at my palm covered by some little blackholes – a proof that Cat Noir had already used his “Cataclysm” spell.

“What now?”

“We have to use this Cataclysm, otherwise I’ll hurt you or myself, or I’ll destroy the Louvre Palace…” I muttered.

Ladybug found a bird feather and popped it out in the air. I caught it and it turned into dust instantly.

“Thanks…” I murmured. “It looked like an Amok, you know?”

“It seems like both of us used the superpowers…” Ladybug sighed looking at a dotted red globe in her hands. “We’ll transform back soon.”

“So, we’d better go down from the roof.” I suggested and stood up.

“Still remember how to use the staff?” Ladybug winked at me in a very Cat Noir’s style.

“You bet!” I laughed.

But I wasn’t amused. I waited for Ladybug leaving towards the Seine and assessed the Cat Noir’s weapon. I repeated to myself to trust to my instinct and to body memory, yet I was terrified at the idea of another air means of transport… I would have to go to therapy after all that!

I found Ladybug at the bank of Seine next to the Pont du Carrousel. We hid under the bridge.

“We don’t have time, Cat…” I whispered. “We have to find a shelter. If Juggler finds us when we are in the civilian selves, we can say goodbye to our Miraculouses.”

“We’ll learn about our identities!” Ladybug replied in horror. Adrien started paninicking… Not good… That didn’t help me at all.

“Actually, I know yours…” I admitted and Ladybug gasped. “But I’m aware it might be a shock for you… Before we’ll transform back, could you show me what’s the ‘Lucky charm’?”

“I have no idea what’s that…”

I glanced at the oval object in Ladybug’s hands. If anyone asked me, I’d say it looked like a new Miracle Box. That meant we needed an ally. My brain tried to work as fast as possible.

“OK, Cat…” I made a decision. “We have to split. I’m going for the Miracle Box, although I have no idea who could we ask for help. Chloe revealed all identities of the miraculous’ holders. I hope I’ll figure out something in the meanwhile. Let’s meet somewhere around the Eiffel Tower. If I make it…”

“I’m sure you will, M’Lady…” Ladybug assured me, and my brain tried to process the collision of words and image of a person speaking. “You have been Lady Noir already, so I’m sure you’ll do your job perfectly…”

“But I have never been a boy…” I muttered, and my partner burst out laughing.

“After Reflekta nothing surprises me anymore…” he replied after a moment.

“Good luck, Cat! Oh, and don’t panic!”

“Why should I?” Ladybug asked me surprised.

“Tikki will take care of you…” I told rather myself than him, suspecting how much he would be shocked when he found out the Ladybug’s identity. “See you later!”

I jumped on the Cat’s staff, trying to overcome sickness at my stomach. I preferred walking on the ground, but there was no time for this. I had to be home before I transformed into Adrien.

I landed on Marinette’s balcony just before my time was up. When my feet stood on the floor I felt transformation. I saw green flashes around me and a cool air ran down through my body. Plagg emerged immediately in front of my face and looked at me concerned. Was it possible that this little sarcastic cat was worrying about a teenager’s emotions?

“Don’t panic, Pigtails…”

Oh, right! Plagg’s nickname for Marinette…

“I’m fine… I knew it was Adrien…” I muttered, jumping into Marinette’s bedroom.

“Really?” Plagg was surprised, but to hide all hints of sensitivity he added in his normal tone: “I’m starving!”

“Of course…” I reached my pocket to get some cheese for the kwami. “Even if I gave you piles of camembert you’d still be starving…”

“Piles of camembert… You know my deepest dreams, Pigtails…”

“No comment… Now, let’s find the Miracle Box…”

“Find? What do you mean by saying ‘find’?” Plagg choked with cheese but looked at me meaningful, so I gave him another piece of camembert. “You’ve already lost it?” he asked ironically.

“I haven’t lost it. I hid it…”

“And you forgot where?”

“It’s a long story…” I muttered.

At that moment my phone began ringing. There was Marinette’s picture on the screen. So Adrien had just found out. I clicked a green button.

“Marinette?!” a shocked face of… well… Marinette was staring at me, but said nothing more.

“Don’t panic. Just breathe!” I replied.

“But… Marinette?”

Not good… Apparently, Adrien’s brain stopped working.

“Calm down, please… Is there Tikki?”

The red kwami didn’t show up, but I heard her voice somewhere there. Oh, right! I forgot that kwami were invisible for technologies!

“Can you take care of him?” I asked with concern. A panicked partner wouldn’t help me in coming back home. “I can see he didn’t take it too well…”

“It’s not like that, Marinette!” Adrien replied. “It’s just…”

“I know, Adrien… I know…” I cut it, although I had no idea what he wanted to say. Probably, he would start talking about our friendship and how happy he was, but surprised too. I had no time for that. I had to find the Miracle Box. “I have a problem, Tik. Can you tell me, where I should look for you-know-what?”

“I can’t tell you…” Tikki sounded like she was really sad that she couldn’t help me. “Try to figure it out. Plagg will help. Remember he can pass through solid objects…”

“If the Box was smeared with camembert he would find it within a couple of seconds…” I muttered under my breath.

“Camembert? Someone has said ‘camembert’? Plagg pricked up his ears. “And I object! I would find the Box within less than a second! If it was smeared with camembert, of course… What a shame it isn’t…”

“Can you give a hint maybe?” I turned back to the phone. “Just a hint, Tikki…”

“All I can tell you is that yesterday we had no time to find a perfect hiding place.” Kwami replied. “We found a tolerable one…”

Woah, much better!

“Why are you so calm?” Marinette, or rather Adrien, cut in.

“What”? I was surprised.

“You don’t look like shocked that… you know… That I am…”

“It’s a long story…” I said, realising that I repeated this too often. “Don’t worry. After ‘Miraculous Ladybug’ we both will forget about our identities.”

“But… I don’t want to forget…” Adrien confessed.

‘Your bad, because you will…’ crossed my mind. That how the spell worked. And I could be more that sure that the original Marinette would have no idea about Cat Noir’s identity.

“Focus, Adrien!” I called him to order. “You must recharge Tikki. You should find some macaroons in my purse. But wait with transformation because I may need Tikki if I have some more problems with seeking. Just… Keep your fingers crossed and wish me luck!”

I hung up.

“I should have made you take back all those ‘just a friend’s!” I muttered to myself. “I swear if you said that, I’d cut myself into pieces. Or you…”

I heard laugh. Plagg seemed to have fun.

“It’s hilarious!”

“I’m so glad to see you find it funny. But maybe let’s find the Box instead, shall we?”

“What a shame you didn’t think about smearing it with camembert…”

“By the way, let’s try to be quiet…” I toned down my voice. “It would be better not to draw parents’ attention. Who knows how they would react seeing a boy searching their daughter’s room…”

“Especially, if it’s a love interest of their daughter…” Plagg added still amused with the situation.

“He’s so blind, that I truly doubt that even if he saw all of those stuff, he would realise about her feelings.”

“Her?” kwami stopped and looked at me alarmed. “You’re not Marinette!” He discovered.

“Bingo! Before Juggler changed me with Cat Noir, he managed to change me with Marinette.” I explained quickly. I had no time for this. Not now. “I’m not Marinette. I’m Lena. And I really need to find this Box if I want to go back home!”

“Tikki knows?”

“Sure she does. She already checked me. And now… Could you please help me in returning to my life? I have no idea where that girl could hide this egg!”

“Don’t ask me!” Plagg turned away from me, yet added under his breath: “But as a big fan of chaos and destruction I’d start from the biggest mess…”

I looked at a pile of fabrics in the corner next to the sewing machine. Theoretically, it could be considered as a ‘tolerable’ hiding place. If I was Gabriel Agreste I wouldn’t even touch a top of this pile, not to mention about diving in it… I began searching the fabrics and other sewing stuff, one by one. After a few minutes I finally found what I had been searching for. When I picked up a big red sphere, I felt like it was vibrating. That was illogical because I wasn’t Marinette – neither internally nor in body. However, the Miracle Box seemed to feel that I was the right person. Weird.

I drew a sign of ‘M’ on the top of the sphere. I didn’t know why such a stupid idea came to my mind, but surprisingly it worked. It wasn’t the first time here, in the Miraculous universe, when my intuition led me correctly to the solution.

The Box started opening, showing me the magic jewels. I didn’t know the abilities of most of them, but I remembered what I had learned about the Miraculous of Fox and the Miraculous of Turtle. I took them from the Box and then I put my hand on the top of the sphere. The Miracle Box closed, and I couldn’t believe that it worked! This time it was illogical to think that it was because of body memory – Adrien had never touched the Miracle Box nor tried to open it. So, why I managed to do it?

“Seriously? Fox and Turtle?” Plagg asked in a doubtful tone.

“I don’t know the others. Besides, when I saw them all, I discovered how we could defeat Juggler. And to do so, I need those two.”

“Wow, I’m impressed, Pigtails…”

I smiled at him. I knew I’d miss him.

“Plagg, claws out!”

---

I, Marinette - p.7  <-  Previous part  |  Next part ->  I, Marinette - p.9

Read the story from the beginning

#miraculous ladybug #fanfic #fanfiction #I Marinette #LadyNoir #Cat Noir #Ladybug #kwami swap #identity reveal #Adrien Agreste #Marinette Dupain-Cheng #Plagg #Tikki #funny story

[mst3kproject]

Kronos

This movie has lots to offer, including but not limited to Jeff Morrow from This Island Earth, John Emery from Rocketship XM, Morris Ankrum from Beginning of the End, and a stupid cartoon robot.  These star in a movie with a complex plot and a lot to say, and nothing like the talent required to say it.  There’s also George O’Hanlon, who was best-known as the voice of George Jetson, although you don’t really notice it in the character he plays here.

After the opening credits play over Ominous Fifties March Music that I’m sure I’ve heard in some other movie before, we begin with some guy getting zapped by a flying saucer at the side of the road.  Rather than being abducted and probed, however, he is instead taken over by alien control and drives to a government lab, where he passes the alien influence on to director Dr. Eliot and then immediately drops dead.

Not far away, a couple of nerds named Les and Arnie are playing with their building-spanning supercomputer SUSIE (Synchro Unifying Sinometric Integrating Equitensor – and why, no, that doesn’t make sense) when they notice what they think is an asteroid on its way to collide with the Earth!  The government launches some stock-footage nukes to destroy it, but they only make it mad. It lands in the ocean off the coast of Mexico, and Les and Arnie, with Les’ girlfriend Vera, rush to investigate. There they find a giant robot stomping out of the sea, devouring energy and growing bigger and bigger!

There’s all sorts of riffable stuff in Kronos.  The first actual shot in the movie after the credits is a blinking cartoon flying saucer zipping across a starfield, to the accompaniment of theremin music.  There’s the fact that none of the scientists seem to notice that their ‘asteroid’ is oddly UFO-shaped and has blinking lights on it. The Mexican couple the scientists are staying with on the beach don’t seem to speak any English and I find myself imagining that they have no idea who these white guys are or why they’re in their house.  The actors in the helicopter that is definitely flying in the air and not sitting on a soundstage somewhere.

And the robot.  Dear lord, the robot.  It looks like a five-year-old’s destroy-bot built out of old-fashioned wooden blocks.  There’s an inaccurate drawing in a newspaper that’s much more impressive than the robot itself… I think it was probably concept art that never quite made it to the screen. It walks by raising two legs at a time straight up and then putting them straight down again, which looks astoundingly stupid even as a cartoon and makes an amusing squeaky-dog-toy sound.

At the same time, a couple of the things they do with the robot are kind of neat.  I do like that it’s not humanoid.  If you really squint you can see it as having a head and a body, but even if that’s the case the form has been stripped down to the barest, most symbolic essentials.  It makes the thing seem more alien, and I like the way it pulls its ‘head’ and ‘legs’ in like a turtle to brace for attack.  There’s also some shots, when the characters are supposedly flying around it in a helicopter, that actually do make it look huge – but it still looks small, as if it’s a tiny toy blown up to building size, like something out of Ant-Man or Honey I Shrunk the Kids.  Since it’s a device that transforms energy into its own mass, maybe it was originally very small.

There are several things that go on at once in Kronos.  Most of the time we’re watching Les, Arnie, and Vera in Mexico, wandering around watching with somber expressions as the robot destroys stuff.  Every so often, though, we cut back to Dr. Eliot, who is in a hospital with the alien influence still controlling him.  Episodes of electroshock therapy intermittently bring him back to himself, allowing him to try to warn the world, but soon the alien takes over again.  As well as controlling Dr. Eliot, it is controlling Kronos, directing it to power plants and nuclear stockpiles.  During a moment of lucidity, Eliot explains to Les that the robot was built by a civilization that is almost out of power, and has therefore sent these things across the cosmos to collect more.

Now, to an astrophysicist this really wouldn’t make sense – the most powerful objects in the universe are things like black holes. Harness even a small one of those, and you’d never need to worry about running out of energy again.  But this movie isn’t about practicalities, it’s about energy use.  The beings who created Kronos are suffering from an energy crisis that may lead to their own extinction, and Dr. Eliot warns Les that humanity may someday end up the same way.

The movie isn’t subtle about this moral: it’s spoken blatantly by the character best placed to understand it.  It would have been nice to see the movie go into it a little more, discussing some of the ways in which our own civilization wastes energy. Instead, the characters spent much of their time roughing it in a shack on the beach in Mexico.  Another way to make the point would be to give the possessed Dr. Eliot a fixation on conserving energy, or conversely, by consuming it, for example by having all the lights on even when he’s sleeping.  This is not done, either.

Slightly more gentle is the point about what humans do with the energy we produce: we destroy stuff, primarily by building atom bombs.  In the world of the movie, this has two undesirable side effects.  First of all, it makes us easy prey for Kronos: the possessed Dr. Eliot recommends to the government that they nuke the robot, but it just turns that energy back into mass and heads north for the nuclear stockpile at Hueneme.  Second, it means that we may also destroy ourselves by too much energy instead of by too little.

This point is rather undercut by the ending, in which the scientists manage to ‘reverse the polarity’ in the robot so that all the mass it has built up turns back into energy… right in the middle of Los Angeles.  By now Kronos has devoured half the power plants in Mexico and a literal nuclear explosion, so shouldn’t that have burned California to a crisp?  Maybe they only had one stock footage nuclear explosion and didn’t want to use it twice.

The vital clue to defeating Kronos comes from Dr. Eliot, temporarily de-possessed by an electric shock.  I spent most of this movie honestly confused what the nameless alien needs with Dr. Eliot.  It gets a list of power plants from him, but since it evidently found out who and where he was without needing any Earthlings to tell it, I’m not sure why that was essential.  It also gets him to recommend nuking Kronos, but somebody would have done that sooner or later, too.  Nor am I sure why electrocution puts it to sleep and lets Dr. Eliot reassert control for a while.  If this is a creature that feeds on electrical energy, as Eliot himself says, shouldn’t zapping it make it stronger?

The scene in which the alien leaves Dr. Eliot’s body is also rather strange.  He falls on the floor, and a liquid seems to run out of his head to the wall where the computer is installed, where it sparks and sizzles.  Does this mean the alien is dead?  But we close on one of those ominous moments where the characters are worrying that more robots may come.  So did it just return to the flying saucer?  What happened to that flying saucer anyway?  Is it still on the seafloor?  Still in space?  Did it transform into Kronos?

The alien in Dr. Eliot is never really justified, and is therefore a transparent plot device.  Two more things that are transparently unnecessary are Arnie and Vera. The former is comic relief who talks about how his computer is his girlfriend, and the latter is a love interest who’s there to sigh whenever Les chooses work over spending time with her. Neither of them really do anything but orbit around Les.  He needs people to interact with, obviously, but the script doesn’t allow either of them to contribute anything.  This is meant to establish that Les is a genius, but it makes it seem like he lets these people hang around out of mere indulgence.  Even the giant computer, while it does a few bits of calculating, doesn’t have nearly a big enough role to justify giving it a name.

I get the impression that the people who made Kronos had some big ideas but rushed them into production without working them through.  Much more could have been done with the themes of energy and consumption, and the characters could have been treated far better.  The robot doesn’t appear until the movie is half-over, which leaves the early scenes feeling dull and bloated.  Even so, it seems like everybody’s hearts were in it.  Fifties sci-fi movies come a lot worse than Kronos, and it would have made for a classic episode of MST3K.

I should warn you, if you want to watch this movie (and there is a version on YouTube), Dr. Eliot and his psychiatrist do discuss the idea of suicide.  This made me expect Dr. Eliot to try to kill himself in a lucid moment in order to get rid of the alien, but that never happens, so the topic was entirely gratuitous.

#mst3k #reviews #kronos #episodes that never were #tw: suicide #50s

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

DOTW 14 - Full

Hanji was reluctant to let him go to his new job on his own. The woman had gently tried to talk him out of it, but that was only because she didn't understand that he wanted to work as a dancer for himself. He wanted to feel sexy and confident again. He wanted to know that he had a hold over every single alpha in the room, while none of them could touch him. Sure the costumes sucked most of the time, and the money wasn't that great, but he loved dancing. He didn't feel dirty or like he wasn't good enough when he was on stage. He was a complete different person, the kind of person he wished he could be in real life. He was strong and unattainable. He could hold his head high and proudly boast that this was his body. Dressing carefully, he braided his hair down the right side, letting it hang loosely, before catching the end up in a messy bun. His makeup was bright blue into a soft green, while his lips were a matt red. He looked good. This job was exactly what he needed to distract him how pathetic his omega side was being over Marco's pregnancy. Since his heats had started at the tender age of 8, his omega was angered that Marco, who's heat's started at 16, was pregnant before him. That his friend would be going through all of this before he got a chance to. He'd been so mixed up and confused by his restless omega side, that he hadn't even been able to talk to Levi about it all, or just in general. He didn't even know if Levi wanted kids, let alone kids with him. He knew the man struggled to always make his feelings known the way he'd intended, much like himself, so he'd forced himself not to text him, incase he said something he'd later regret. Coming downstairs, Hanji sighed as he walked into the living area "You look nice" "I know" "You know..." "Hanji, please" "I'm just worried for you" "It'll all be ok. I worked for two years before I fell off the stage that time. I know what I'm doing" "I know you so. And I know you're strong, and that you can take care of yourself. It's just... all a bit sudden" "Like I said, I got a call from someone I used to dance with, and their club needed a new dancer" The lie rolled smoothly off his tongue. It wasn't like he'd never danced with Zeke, so it wasn't all a lie. And. If Zeke was the one behind the job, he'd be safe. His brother wouldn't let him get hurt "You should at least let me drive you" "They're picking me up. I promise to text you if anything goes wrong" "And you trust them?" "I've known them for years" "Ok... Have a good time" "I will. I've missed dancing so much..." "Just make sure you don't over tax your ankle" "I promise not to undo all your hard work" Hanji finally climbed off the sofa, walking over to him, she pulled him into a tight hug "I'm sorry for being overbearing" "You're just worried about me. I know. Thank you" "Your rides been out the front for like 5 minutes now. You better go" "Yeah. I don't know my hours yet, so I'll probably be home late" "You've got you keys, right?" "Yep" "Then you'll be ok" Prying Hanji off him, the woman wiped at her eyes "I feel like a proud mum sending her baby off to school" "You know I'm 20, and a stripper right?" "Fine. I feel like a proud mum who's sending her 20 year old off to be an exotic dancer" Eren grinned happily, Hanji having wrinkled her face at her own words "That's better. I'll see you later" * "What's an aquarium?" Blinking at the simple message from Eren, he smiled to himself. Some people might wake up to a "Good Morning", but from Eren, it was almost always a question. By the looks of it, the kid had sent it at some ungodly hour when Eren should have definitely been asleep Levi - "Good morning to you too. It's what you keep fish in. Ack-wear-ee-um" Meowing at the fact his human was awake, Titan came flying up on his bed, knocking his phone from his hand as he began to meow for breakfast "Yes, I know. I'm a terrible person for letting you spend hours and hours foodless while I slept" It wasn't like the cat didn't have an auto-feeder. The kind where the biscuits sat in the plastic drum and were lowered as they disappeared from the attached bowl. Titan yowled his agreement, while Levi's phone chimed. It was still stupid o'clock in the morning. Bundling Titan under one arm, he grabbed his phone Eren - "How do you go on a date at one then? If it's just a tank?" Levi - "If it's a date, it'll be at the public aquarium. They have fish, sharks, turtles and shit" His phone dinged as he climbed from his bed, dropping Titan down to the floor. The kid would have to wait until he'd shat, showered and shaved. With his morning routine taken care of, Levi settled down at his small dining table. His usual cup of tea accompanied by two slices of toast. He knew he really should care more about his diet, but cooking large meals for himself seemed like too much work. Picking up his phone, he pulled up Eren's message Eren - "That makes more sense. Marco took Jean there on a date to tell him he's pregnant" The horse-faced arsehole was going to be a father? He knew Marco was special to Eren, but his taste in alphas was awful Levi - "Tell him congrats from me" Eren - "I will. Have you been to an aquarium before?" Levi - "In college. Hanji's brilliant idea" Eren didn't reply straight away, nor had he replied by the time he'd finished his breakfast. He didn't think he'd said anything wrong, or anything that could upset Eren. Even after texting back and forth for weeks, he still got nervous when Eren didn't reply straight away. He'd told himself friends texted, but he and Eren texted off and on almost all day, if he wasn't working or exhausted. The omega seemed to just magically know when he was. The kid had so many questions about everything, yet he didn't find it annoying. Some omegas accepted their lot in lives, but Eren was striving to better educate himself. Checking his phone when he got to work, he found Eren still hadn't replied. Throwing the device back up on the dash, he let a small sigh of annoyance. Not with Eren, instead at his own feelings of annoyance "Everything alright?" "Yeah. Maybe. I was talking to Eren, but he didn't reply" Erwin snorted lightly "Don't give me that" "I didn't say anything" "You snorted" "I was just thinking its unusual for you to be so focused on your phone" "I'm helping Eren out" "Oh?" "There's lots he doesn't know about, so he asks me what things mean" "Ah. Hanji said he'd been spending most of his time reading lately. He carries the book almost everywhere he goes. I suppose you're to blame?" "He wanted to learn to read, so I bought him a copy of "The Chronicles of Narnia", any words he doesn't understand, he messages me over" "So what was the word this morning?" "Aquarium. Jean and Marco went on a date there. The horsefaced arseholes going to be a father" "Marco's pregnant?" "Yeah. Eren asked me if I've ever been, but didn't reply when I said I had" "You mean when Hanji decided it would be so much fun if we got drunk and snuck in" "It still counts" "And he stopped replying?" "Pretty much. Nothing" "Maybe he wanted you to take him?" Levi rolled his eyes "Right" "He could have just asked Marco what he meant, but he asked you" "Marco probably texted him" "Mhmmm" Bringing his leg up, he kicked Erwin in the side "Hey! I'm trying to drive here" "Then don't be an arsehole" "I'm just saying, if you asked him, I'm sure he'd love to go with you" "That's too much like a date" "Would it be so bad? He seems to be in a better place now. He's working again. He's learning to read. He's going to therapy" "Working?" "Didn't he tell you? Hanji called me about last week. Eren's got a new job dancing again" No. The brat hadn't told him... Why hadn't he told him? He didn't like Eren doing such a dangerous job, but it was Eren's choice. Eren had no obligation to tell him... but it just wasn't like him "You really didn't know?" "No, but what he does is his business" "You're glaring again" Kicking Erwin again, he huffed, before drawing his leg back "Don't be like that. He might have just wanted to surprise you" "It's none of my business" "The way you've been attached to your phone says otherwise" "You're an arsehole" "Message him and ask him to the aquarium. I guarantee you won't regret it..." Eren would probably love it. The kid's eyes would go wide at the sheer number of fish, and all the colours. Shit. That'd be pretty fucking adorable "..and you know he's home alone until Sunday, right?" Moblit's mother was having surgery on her hip, Hanji and Moblit had flown out to spend the week with her "I'm sure Hanji and Moblit would love me hanging out with Eren, completely unsupervised" "You make it sound like he's their underage son" "He practically is. Hanji's completely smitten with him. She's got framed photos of him up on the mantle now" "That sounds about right for her" She didn't last time he was there. He would have noticed... so Erwin had been there since he had? Eren hadn't told him that... He thought they'd been getting closer, but maybe it'd all been in his head "You should ask him" "And you should shut up. I still haven't forgiven you for that shit with Petra. Do you know how stubborn Olou can be? He totally "forgot" the paperwork I needed because he was mad at me" "I'll take you out for drinks after work" "You say that, but we both know I'm the one who's going to end up paying" "I didn't hear you say no" "Whatever" The rest of the shift passed in a haze. He couldn't stop thinking about Eren, and if he should invite him to the aquarium. He didn't want to get the omega's hopes up, or string him along. He just wanted to make the brat happy. Leaving depot, Erwin handed him his phone back, Levi having cleaned the ambulance back out completely, forgetting about the device while he did. Taking his phone back, he stuffed it into his pocket. Not even thinking Erwin would message Eren. * Collapsing on his bed from work, Eren didn't want to move. He still needed to shower, and force himself to make something for dinner. Or was it breakfast? Without Hanji and Moblit around, the house was so much bigger. So much more quieter. He missed the pair. He missed Hanji coming in to wake him up, and having a beer with Moblit while watching TV. It was only a couple more days until they returned, and it wasn't like he'd never been on his own before. Hanji called daily to check in, reassuring him that they would be coming back. Besides, it wasn't like he couldn't talk to Levi. He'd spent the morning talking to him, until he had to go to work. Instead of just dancing, he was working as a dancer and cleaner. The club shut at 3am, then they'd clean through until around 5. He'd go home, pass out until lunch time, then back out to work at 6. The pay wasn't great, but the club was definitely cleaner than his old work place. The omegas all top class dancers, which only made him more determined. He didn't want to lose out to them. He wanted tips, and wasn't afraid to go after them... especially when none of the other dancers seemed to like him. At the old club, he'd had a few he'd look out for, but at this new club, he was the new kid and knew nothing. So maybe he wasn't loving work as much as he was pretending to, but only because it was all new all over again. Things would get better. Zeke wouldn't send him somewhere where he'd be hurt. At least he had the next two days off. Hearing his phone ding, he groaned as he fished it out his back pocket. Levi. Ugh. He didn't want to deal with this. He'd chickened out of asking Levi to take him to the aquarium. Marco had only told he and Jean had gone, and that Jean was excited about becoming a father. Levi said the aquarium had all fish and sharks and turtles. He'd never seen them outside of books, and fish that wasn't food. Opening Levi's message, he let out a half squeak Levi - "Hey, I've been thinking. Do you want to go to the aquarium?" Yes! Yes! YES! Wait. Was this a date? Was Levi asking him on a date? No. This couldn't be a date. Levi just wanted to show him what an aquarium actually was. He had to reply! He wanted to go! Eren - "I'm off tomorrow and Thursday. Do they really have sharks?" He couldn't imagine something so big, in the movies, contained by simple glass. It didn't make sense to him. He'd seen Deep Blue Sea! Sharks were scary! Trying not to be too disappointed at Levi's lack of reply, he buried his face into his pillow. What would he even wear? That blue shirt again? No. He couldn't wear that. And he wasn't dressing like a girl. Levi knew he wasn't a girl, and if the alpha was only interested in him when he looked like one, he didn't want to see him. That wasn't fair. Levi wasn't like that. Even after sleeping with him, he didn't treat him like a conquest. He felt genuinely bad, and truly wanted to form a friendship. If Marco was his best omega friend, then Levi was his alpha friend. Hanji was more like a mum or a sister, and Moblit like a father. Zeke was his brother and family, and he didn't know if he could be best friends with his brother. Levi didn't message back until after Eren had forced himself to shower and eat. Loneliness setting in as TV failed to entertain him. Sitting on the sofa, he stared down at Levi's message Levi - "Shitty Eyebrows took my phone. So you want to go the aquarium? Are you a rainbow fish, Because you light up the world with colour" He wasn't completely sure what to say... rainbow fish didn't sound like a real thing, but this had to be a compliment right?! He didn't know any fish like pick-up lines... fish weren't even sexy. He'd never been fishing either Levi - "Relax brat. It was just a joke. We can go Thursday" Ok. This he could work with Eren - "I've never been. Is there anything I need to bring or wear?" That sounded alright. Yeah... Levi - "No. I'll pick you up at 9, be ready" Eren bit his bottom lip. He needed to set an alarm. And he needed to get his money so he could pay Levi back. Should he make something for lunch? Could they buy lunch there? Did they serve food that wasn't fish? He could ask Marco, but he and Jean were all loved up over their baby. He didn't want to disturb them Eren - "Ok. I'm looking forward to it" He was going to the aquarium with Levi! Yes! Something was going right! Placing his phone back down, he snatched it back up all over again when it pinged Levi - "This is Erwin. Levi's a little drunk, so I'm turning his phone off now. He'll see you Thursday" Was all of this Erwin? Or Levi? Erwin didn't call him brat. No, Levi was just hanging out with Erwin. No need to over think things. He was going to the aquarium with Levi... * Wednesday took forever to pass, Thursday morning, however, time seem to pass way too fast. Having showered and carefully dressed, Eren was barely ready by 9. His outfit consisting of black skinny jeans, a black collared shirt and black sneakers. All of which hugged his frame nicely. He'd thought about wearing a beanie, but it just wouldn't sit right. He wanted too look nice for Levi, because he was probably going to make a fool of himself by asking Levi a million questions. Triple checking he had his phone, keys, wallet and the money to pay back Levi, he thought himself on top of his nerves until Levi knocked on the door. His knees feeling like they were ready to give way at any moment. Taking the steps carefully, he straightened himself out again, before striding over to the door. "Hey brat. Ready to go" Levi looked hot. The shorter man dressed in black, his hair messy, but neat at the same time "You with me?" Blushing slightly, Eren cleared his throat "Um... yes. Sorry. I'm really nervous" Levi snorted, making Eren's heart skip. He was completely fucked. The smile on the man's face looked so natural "You don't need to be nervous" "Right. I guess we should go?" Turning on the alarm, Eren locked the door from the inside and pulled the door closed behind him. He'd been talking to Levi by text for so long. He shouldn't be this nervous "Brat, you need to relax. You look like you're about to shit yourself" "Maybe I am?" "Are you?" "No. Are there really sharks at the aquarium?" "Is that what's worrying you?" "I don't get how there can be sharks" "Evolution" "What?" "Never mind" Reaching Levi's car, the alpha opened the passenger side door for him. Eren mumbling his thanks as he slid into the car. Taking a deep breath, Levi's calming scent easing his nerves, while reminding him that this was the very car they'd had sex in. Fuck. No. He couldn't go there. For some stupid reason Levi could smell the changes in his messed up scent. He couldn't afford to think of anything remotely dirty. Even if the man looked hot. Closing the door, Levi rounded the car and climbed up behind the wheel "It's a half hour drive, is that ok?" "Y-yes" His reply came out as a kind of strangled squeak. Hiding his face his hands, he wanted to go back to bed and start the day all over again "Eren, if you don't want to go. We can call this whole thing off" "No. I want to go. I'm just... you look hot" Starting the car, Levi nodded, indicating before pulling away from the curb "I know. You look pretty good too" "Thanks... I really didn't know what to wear" "What you've got on is just fine" "I'm sorry I'm so bad at this. I've never been anywhere really" "I already figured as much. Trust me, there's going to be shitty brats running around the place, so even if you fall on your face, no ones going to notice" "That's not what I'm worried about" "What are you worried about, then?" "That I'm going to embarrass you" Levi gave a small laugh "It's fine. What's it like having the house to yourself?" He was making Levi laugh, but had he said something wrong? The alpha had just suddenly changed the topic "Quiet. It's weird" "Hanji and Moblit come back on Sunday, right?" "Yeah. I hope they don't mind I've been eating their food" "Brat, they're probably not even going to nice" "I don't know if you're encouraging me to eat more, or to lie about what I've eaten" "Both. But if you're really worried, we can go shopping after we've been to the aquarium" "Won't I be taking up enough of your time?" "You're fine" Shaking his head, he took a deep breath and sat up "I think I want to get my hair cut. It's getting a bit insane" "I didn't like to say anything, buuut..." "I wonder if I should get it cut like yours" "What would your boss think?" His stomach rolled. He didn't want to think about what his boss would think, or the other dancers "Maybe not" "You're not enjoying work?" "Works fine. I get to dance, so that's alright" "Have you ever had lessons or anything?" "No. Zeke showed me some videos online, but that's about it. Can you dance?" "Nobody wants to see that shit" He did. He'd love to see if Levi could dance. He secretly bet he could. He had a nice frame already. His arms were strong, with long lean muscles rather than having those bulky weird muscles that made his head look like an after thought "I think you'd look nice" "Don't go picturing me in those gold booty-shorts of yours, because that's never going to happen" "I don't even have them anymore" "Such a shame" Was that sarcasm? He couldn't tell "Relax. It's a joke" "They were nicer than some of the things I've worn" "I bet they were" As silence fell between them, Eren started to panic. He wanted today to go perfectly "So..." "How..." Their words overlapped "You go" "It's ok. I was just going to ask how work was, for you?" Levi nodded "Long... somedays good, some shit" "Is that why you were drinking with Erwin?" Levi didn't reply straight away, Eren cursing himself "Um... sorry, it's none of my business" "It's fine. You don't need to keep apologising for everything" "I just really want today to go well, but I keep putting my foot in it" "You don't, and it will. I was drinking with Erwin because he got me in the shit with Petra" Eren wrinkled his face, knowing he knew the name "You met her that day Hanji dropped you off" "Oooh. She's like short and strawberry blonde right?" "Yeah. She's got an annoying habit of finding me, even when I don't want to be found" Eren's heart dropped a little "She likes you" "I told her I'm gay, but she never listens. Couldn't you just try and be with me? How do you know you're gay?" "That's not very nice. You should accept people for how they are" "Unfortunately the world doesn't work that way" "I know... people usually think male omegas are wrong or gross. It's not like we asked to present this way" "Everyone thought I was going to present as omega" "What? No way..." "It's because I'm short for an alpha" "So? That's like saying I should be an alpha because I'm stupidly tall. You can't control these things" "I think you're fine the way you are" Eren's heart couldn't take it. Not another compliment so soon "Eren?" "You're like... pretty... I mean fine, uh, good too" English. Great. Speak. Well. Not. Fucking shoot him. Laughing, Levi wiped a fake tear from his eye "Brat. I think that's the best compliment I've ever been given" "It's your fault. I can't talk properly when I'm around you" "Do we need to go back to texting?" "You shouldn't text and drive" "Most young people would disagree" "Then they're idiots" "They are. And it's never just them that gets hurt if there's an accident. There's their family. Friends. People who are involved in the crash and the friends and family of them too. Everyone always says it won't happen to them, yet they get all shitty when it does" "Life's more valuable than that. No one realises how lucky they are to be alive. All it takes is for a moment and you're gone" Shit. He'd let that slip out "You sound like you learnt that the hard way" "I don't want to talk about it" "I didn't mean too..." "I know. It's just..." "Eren, you don't need to explain. Why don't we talk about something nicer? Like, how are you going with your reading?" "I finished the first book..." "That's awesome" "It is?" "Did you understand most of it?" "Only because you helped... I thought maybe you'd be mad because it took me so long" "How can I be mad?" "It's taken months" "So? Do you know more words and sounds than when you started?" Eren ducked his head, not sure where Levi was going with this "Yes" "Then what's the problem? You're learning, and you're getting through it. Do you like the story?" "I don't know how they go together yet, so don't tell me. Lucy is kind of annoying though" "I won't tell you" "Good. I don't know if I'd like to be able to travel between worlds" "Isn't that something kids would jump at?" "I'm not a kid" "I didn't mean it like that" "I know. Still, I don't think I'd like to. Keeping up with everything here is bad enough. Keeping up with another world seems like even more work" "You miss the days of doing nothing?" "No. That's not what I mean either. Besides. What's to say if you go through, that you won't walk into something even worse?" "That's true. Has Hanji tried to make you watch the movies?" "I don't want to. I don't want to know what's coming" "The movies are never as good as the books" "You can imagine all the characters in your head when you read the books, but when you see the movie, it ruins all that. It's like forcing you to accept things that way" "That's a pretty mature approach to take" "Is it? I don't know. People usually tell me I'm weird and what I say is weird" The people at work... "Those people are wrong" "I probably am" "Being normal is overrated" "Is that coming from your years of experience?" "Pretty much. I'm an alpha who lives alone with his cat. It's not exactly the normal alpha package" "Normal alphas are arseholes" "I can't deny that" "I didn't even think there could be nice alphas until Zeke came along. And didn't think I'd actually have friends who are alphas" "You seem to be doing better" "When you're not talking me through a panic attack, you mean" "Eren, you can't control these things and it's ok" "It makes me feel stupid" "You're not stupid" "I feel it" "You're not" "If you say so" "I do. So if we're not going to talk about Lucy, what are you looking forward to most at the aquarium?" "I want to see the turtles" "Turtles" "Yeah. They're all small and cute" "You do know they grow up" "They're still small and cute" "That's like saying Titan is small and cute" "He is" "We both know he's not" "He is when compared to an elephant" "Most things are" "He still is. I've never got to play with a cat before. He was so soft and fluffy" "He's a greedy little shit. Almost all cats are. They act all sweet, but what they really want is food and to know they can walk all over you" "I don't care. I still like him" Shinganshima didn't have an ocean, so part of the river had been turned into a dam. Shinganshima Maritime Aquarium backed onto it, or so Levi said. The place was massive. Painted in a deep blue, with a long whale stretching out under the gold letters proclaiming its name. With a lack of parking bays, Levi ended up parking towards the back of the lot, but Eren didn't care. Their conversation had taken up nearly the whole ride, until they'd crossed the bridge and his attention had been caught by how much water there was "Are you ready?" "Yep! Oh, hang on" Grabbing out the neatly folded piece of paper he'd folded into a kind of envelope, he passed it over to Levi "What's this?" "Um. I wanted to pay you back" Frowning as he opened the package, Levi shook his head "Do I want to know how much this is?" "$500" "Eren, you can't just go around with five hundred dollars on you" "But I wanted to pay you back" "It's a lot of cash to be carrying around. Did you get this from work?" "From before Hanji took me in" "When you were with Zeke?" "Yeah. I saved up my pay because I didn't have a bank account. Zeke gave it back to me" "You still shouldn't carry this much around and you didn't have to rush to pay it back" "I've had the money for a while. I just haven't had the chance to give it to you" "You could have used it" "I haven't needed to" He didn't get what the big deal was. He could now buy what he needed, and it wasn't like he didn't still have almost everything he'd bought when shopping with Levi. Levi still looked annoyed. Reaching over, he opened the glove compartment, placing the money inside and locking it with his car key, before going about climbing out the car without saying anything. It was hard not be hurt by his actions when he still couldn't work out how paying Levi back was bad. Maybe he didn't like the fact he was dancer? It wasn't like he'd slept with anyone for money. Some of the other dancers did, but it just wasn't for him. Even so. It was his body to do with what he wanted. Trailing behind Levi, he wanted to ask the alpha to slow down. He wanted to take everything in, but by the way Levi was striding towards the ramp that lead up to the front door, it was more like the alpha wanted to get things over and done with. Confused and anxious, he tripped on his own feet. Starting to cry from the shock of it like a child might. Finally stopping, Levi noticed him kneeling on the ground. Jogging back to him, the alpha squatted down "What happened? Did you trip?" He didn't want to be crying. He was inconveniencing Levi. Today was supposed to be a good day "Hey, come on. You're alright. Take a few deep breaths, then we'll stand you up" "I made you mad" Levi drew his brow "What?" "This. All of this was stupid! You didn't want to come with me, and you're mad at me. Why do I always have to fuck things up?" "What makes you think I'm mad at you?" "You just walked off! You got out of the car and walked off..." "Sorry. I thought you'd want to get in there as soon as possible" "You didn't even wait for me. I haven't been here before. I don't know what to do or where to go" "You're right. I wasn't thinking. Did you hurt yourself when you tripped?" "N-no..." "Here, how about we get you standing now? I'm not mad. I just didn't think" Taking his hand, Levi pulled him up to his feet. His knees were definitely protesting, and he'd probably skinned them. But he was still scared that Levi was actually angry, so didn't dare tell him. Wiping at his face with his left hand, he felt so stupid "Are you ready?" Nodding, he didn't even realise Levi was still holding him hand as the man fell into step beside him. They were still holding hands right up until they reached the ramp. Eren blushing as Levi pulled his hand away, mumbling an awkward apology before letting him walk in front of him. The hand rail for the ramp was really kind of cool. Each spot where the brackets came out was shaped like an octopus, their long legs reaching and joining to the next octopus about halfway between the brackets. At the bottom of the rendered brickwork were cartoony sea creatures. He would have taken a photo of it, but now just wanted to get inside. * Levi felt like a dick. He hadn't meant to brush Eren off, but after being give $500 from the omega like it was nothing, he was slightly annoyed. Part of him had hoped Eren had forgotten all about the loan, while another part wondered if Eren was lying about where the money came from. It wasn't hard to believe Zeke gave him the cash to keep him preoccupied, or to hold. Yet Eren insisted it was his money. He didn't want to doubt the kid, so pissed off at himself over the fact his mind was so willing to go there. Annoyed, he'd begun towards the aquarium without even thinking, only realising Eren was beside him when heard him starting to panic. Jogging the few steps back to Eren, he cursed himself. The omega was riddled with nerves and anxieties, and this was probably a really big things for him. He'd have to try so much fucking harder than normal, because he'd fucked up and made the one person in the whole world he didn't want to cry, feel like he was stupid and unwanted. Taking his hand, he didn't want to let it go, conscious of how warm and soft it felt in his own. It wasn't until the reached the stairs that Eren seemed to realise, the omega looking confused as he mumbled an apology. He wasn't like Erwin. He didn't know how to date someone, or how to even hold hands properly. He was awkward and short, with a shitty temper and love for a brat that was 15 years his junior. Reaching the top of the ramp, Eren's eyes were trying to take in everything, while all he could see was the teen. They hadn't even walked through the glass doors yet! How could someone be so fucking pure after going through so much shit "Ready?" "Yep! I want to see all the fishes!" Levi couldn't help but snort, Eren sounded like a little kid "The plural of fish, is just fish" "What?" "Yep" "Why?" "I didn't make the rules" "Ugh. Why is English so hard?" "Because the English just took what they wanted and didn't care about those who'd follow" "If you say so" "It's a joke" "It's not funny" A shy smile played on Eren's lips "I'm sorry for walking so far ahead" "It's ok..." "It's not. I'm not mad. Maybe a little nervous, but I'm not mad at you" "You're nervous?" "Of course I am. I've none done this before" "Done what?" "Taken a brat to an aquarium" "I've never been to one, you could pretty much say anything and I'd believe it" "I wouldn't do that to you" "I know you wouldn't. I think we need to go through the doors?" "Smart-arse" Stepping forwards, the doors slip open with a slight jolt at the ends. The inside was decorated with shades of blues, vertical tanks running up the walls on each side of the front desk. Taking Eren by the hand, purely so he couldn't wander away, Levi led him over to the counter where a tallish blonde man was standing, his name tag reading Armin "Welcome to Shinganshima Maritime Aquarium. Just the two of you today?" "Yeah" Feeling Eren trying to escape, he tugged lightly, bringing the omega back to his side "So that's two adults, no concessions... neither of you are under 21, right?" "Um... why?" "Don't ask me why, but everyone between 16 and 21 falls into our middle pricing group. To be honest, I'm actually still kind of new here" "It's fine" "Levi, if it means you save money..." "Eren, it's fine" "It's not fine" Stubbornly, and one handedly the omega fished out his wallet and ID, sliding it across the desk to Armin. For a moment, he swore the guys widened as he frowned, but in a flash he was back to smiling "With your discount, that will be $43.30. How will you be paying today?" "Cash" Pulling his own wallet out, Levi fished out a $50. It would have been so much easier if he let go of Eren's hand, but he really didn't want to. He liked Eren, and though not courting or in any kind of relationship, he wanted to keep him close so other alphas wouldn't be tempted by the beautiful brat. Ringing up their tickets, Armin handed them over with their change "Just follow the orange arrows through to the first enclosure. Have a good day" Brightly Eren smiled at Armin, not knowing how jealous it made Levi's alpha "Thank you!" With the tickets and his change tucked away in his wallet, he pulled Eren towards the orange arrows painted on the carpet "I'm so excited" "I noticed" Placing his hand on Levi's arm, Eren squeezed his hand as the tunnel they were walking through darkened. On each side there were small illuminated signs, but the omegas eyes were straight ahead, and the signs really weren't that interesting. Emerging in the walk through tank area, Eren let out a small squeak as large stingray passed over the top of their heads, stepping onto the escalator that ran a loop around the room, the omega was half hiding behind him "What the fuck is that?" "It's a stingray" "It's fucking massive..." Eren's sentence tapered off as a school of blue fish passed by the glass they were next to, peering around him to watch the school swim away "Wow..." Shit. Eren had no idea how adorable he looked, and they'd only just started their adventure. He couldn't help but smile fondly as Eren darted back behind him "Is that a fucking shark?!" Earning a glare from the mothers a little way in front of them, Levi snorted "It's just a shark" "How come it doesn't eat everything in there? How come the glass doesn't cave in?" "Probably because they feed them, and the glass is a special kind, so it doesn't break" "That's so cool... look, it's another kind of shark" The smaller shark had two fish attached to its bottom? whatever the underside was called "It sure is" "This is so cool" Doing the round trip, Eren loosened up, staring up in wonder and fascination as he tried to take everything in at once. Stepping off at the next corridor opening, the omega pulled him along to look at the tanks embedded in the walls "How come there's so many colours?" "There's some things I can answer" "Ok. But look at them. Wow... I've never even seen real fish" "You've never been in a pet shop?" "Zeke doesn't like animals" Levi couldn't help but frown at that. Just because he didn't like animals, didn't mean Eren should have to go without "Look at these ones, they look like Nemo" "They're called Clown Fish" "They're so cute! I wonder if..." Eren let out yet another squeak as he found the Royal Blue Tangs, as the sign said "It's Dory!" "Do you know what their name is?" Leaning back, Eren peered at the sign "Royal Blue... Tangs. That means Dory is a Royal Blue Tang!" "Yep" The kid looked so fucking proud of himself "Oh wow! What are these ones?" "They're seahorses" "They're so tiny. Look at them, they look like grass... and look at their tiny bellies! They all look pregnant. Oh, I should take a photo and send it to Marco. This is so him in the future" "They are rather cute" "Yep! I'm probably never going to have kids, but that doesn't mean I can't tease Marco over it all" Why did Eren think he wasn't going to have kids? The omega would make a beautiful mother, so fierce and protective of his pups... he was going to ask, but was distracted by Eren naming all the sea horses in the tank after people he knew. Lead around to each tank, Eren's scent was so happy, and unlike the shitty kids near them, the omega didn't even think about tapping on the glass. Levi's heart really couldn't take this. He wanted to pull Eren close and kiss him each time his eyes lit up, which would have resulted in a hell of a lot of kissing. At the end of the corridor, the room opened into a massive space. A whole whale skeleton suspended from the ceiling "What's that?! It's huge. It has to be a whale right?" "Yep" "How do they get so big? How do they move under water?" "Do you want me to take a photo of you in front of it?!" "You'd do that?" "Eren, you can take as many photos as you want, just as long as you don't use the flash on your phone" Rushing to get his phone out, he fumbled it into Levi's hand, as he released his hold. For a moment, Levi regretted telling him anything, but Eren confidently strode up to near the rope preventing people from getting too close. Walking over, he opened Eren's camera, lining up the shot as the omegas looked ready to burst from excitement "Levi... hurry up!" "Hold on, or don't you want a photo?" Making sure to get the whole skeleton in, he got a couple like that, before narrowing it down to a few of just Eren on his own. He wanted the kid to see how adorable and entranced he looked "Levi?" "Done" "Now you have to pose" "What? Why?" "Because I want photos of you. I mean, I want photos of us both here. No matter what, I want to remember this" Forced to trade places, Eren happily shooed him off to pose. Thankfully it wasn't long before the octopi caught Eren's attention, and he was forced to job over to catch up "Look at them. Do you think they're slimy?" "I would say so? I don't know, but they look revolting" They looked like a pile of moving snot with snotty legs, or an untreated infection that had given up and walked away from its host. Whatever it was, it made him want to wash his hands "He's adorable. He? They? It's? It's adorable" Knowing he could take photos now, Eren took photos absolutely everything he could in the room, even the shitty bits of wood they liked to call a shipwreck. Slowly they worked their way around the room, where Eren even seemed to be interested in things that weren't sea life. There were different displays on waves, sand dunes, money, cannons, and treasures recovered from the coast of Paradis. When it came to the remains of humans killed during a mutiny, Eren's scent changed completely. It filled with so much sadness, he had to gently guide Eren away. He wanted to reach out and ask Eren what had upset him so much, but didn't want the omega falling further into his thoughts. There was a shitty ship's wheel, oar and small row boat, which he made sure to take photos of as Eren was still spacey. The omega wanted photos of everything, and he didn't want him to miss out. When they reached the start of a new line of tanks, Eren perked back up. Levi couldn't help but snap another photo as the omega wrinkled his face up at a large white catfish "You look the same" "Really? I think it looks like you" "Are you saying I'm ugly?" "But in a cute way" Poking tongue out, Eren moved to the next tank. So Eren thought he was cute? He could live with that. Continuing on, they finally came to touch pool he'd been waiting for. Eren gasping this time "You mean we actually touch stuff?" "You need to rinse your hands first, the sign says so" "But we can touch it?" "If you wash your hands" Bounding over to the basin against the wall, Eren rinsed his hands like the sign said, before coming back to the touch pool "You're really going to do it?" "Why not?" "Do you know how many people put their hands in there?" "And how many people get to say they've touched a shark and survived?" The tiny sharks weren't even a rulers length long "Go ahead" "You're not going to?" "I'll stick to taking photos" He didn't want to think about dirty hands and peeled bandaids... and fish faeces. The whole tank was just a whole lot of nope! Carefully sliding his hand into the water, Eren's eyes sparkled as his head shot up "I'm touching a shark!" "Yep" "This is like... the best day ever!" Taking photos of everything, he watched as Eren was super careful towards the collections of sea creatures in the tank. It didn't matter what it was, he only touched for a few brief seconds, even when he finally got to touch the one small turtle in there. Beaming at the world, Eren washed his hands again after touching everything, using the soap dispenser this time. Walking back to his side, Eren threw his arms around him "Thank you! This... all of this is just so amazing" "There's more" "More?" "We still haven't headed outside yet" "But... what?" "Come on, brat" "I can't believe there's more" Ending their hug, Eren took his hand again. Levi unable to care about the fact Eren's hand was still wet. He felt like the dopiest and shittiest idiot because of the fucking smile that refused to get the off his face. Heading outside, the white Mediterranean themed veranda over looked the dam. Despite being so far from the ocean, Silver Gulls squawked and looped over head. Pulling him forward, Eren eyed a mediumish sized replica of a Silver Gull "What is that? And why is it so red?" Levi snorted "This one I actually do know. It's called a Silver Gull, or a Sea Gull. When they reach sexual maturity, their legs and beak turn red" "How do you know that?" "I once had a friend who liked birds. She said they put on their bright red stocking and lipstick, then hit up the town" Eren giggled "I don't think I want to imagine a bird in drag" "Neither do I. I give them points for trying, but they've got nothing on you" "Levi! Be nice" "I am. It's not my fault you and Marco dressed up as girls" "That was all Marco's idea. It's not our fault we look so fucking good" "I think I prefer you like this" Eren's smile grew even wider "I like being a boy better. The customers all treat us like girls, or like we're weak. They get mad because they don't get to touch" "You're definitely not weak. I'm honestly kind of surprised you went back to dancing" "I love it. Things might not be great, but it makes me feel good. Knowing they can't touch me" Well fuck. Right now Levi wanted to touch the fuck out of him. Walking over to the statue of a Pacific Gull, Eren shook his head "Birds are fucking weird" "You don't like birds?" "I'm... jealous? I mean, they can fly wherever they want. The get to see all these amazing things from up there. They're so nice to watch, but I don't think I want to touch one" "Why not?" "Because you get those tiny ones. How are you even supposed to touch them without hurting them? And pigeons shit on like everything. I don't want to be shat on" "So you like birds?" "Yes, I like birds. I'm just a little scared and don't you dare give me that look" "I'm not giving you any look" "Sure. It's still really pretty out here. I made a promise with a friend when I was little we'd see the ocean. I don't even remember them, or what they looked like. I just remember the words" "Does it upset you? Not being able to remember?" "I'm not the same person I was back then, are they're probably not either. Anyway, it's depressing. Do you think the ocean looks like this dam?" "I think it's a big sandy mess" "Probably. I still want to go one day" The moment just seemed right. Stepping up behind Eren, he wrapped his arms around the omega. Eren letting out a soft laugh as he leant his head back "Thank you. Today's been amazing" "Yeah. Last time I was here, we were drunk and snuck in. It was no where near as fun as today" "I can't really imagine you being drunk" "Is it that weird?" "No. You're just so level headed" "Is that the polite way of saying I'm a constipated arsehole?" "You're never going to let me live that down, are you?" "No. This place has a cafe, do you want to grab some lunch?" "Mmm. Can we sit out here?" "I don't see why not" Kissing him on the cheek, Eren wriggled his way out his hold. Levi momentarily shocked over what had happened. Life wasn't this perfect. Things didn't go this well. This had to be some kind of dream. With so many people and so many words on the menu, Eren shyly said he'd wait outside. Wanting to spoil the kid, but also knowing he eating issues he opted to grab Eren a juice, as well as a salad, a fisherman's basket consisting of fish, prawns, crab sticks and chips, and finally a small serving of nachos. He might have gone slightly over board, but everything was served in white foam boxes, so it wasn't like they couldn't take it with them when they left. Letting the cashier know they'd be sitting outside, he took their number out to where Eren was sitting at table towards the corner of the area "I thought you'd want to sit in the sun?" "This fine. The wind isn't as bad here" Passing Eren his juice, the omega nodded "Do I want to know what you ordered?" "A few things. Don't worry, you don't have to eat what you don't want" "I hope you didn't spend too much" "It's fine. I asked you out" "Can I confess something?" Sitting across from Eren, Levi opened his ice tea "What?" "I was kind of hoping you would. I wanted to ask you, but I didn't want to make things awkward or weird" "Have they been?" "No. Maybe a little at the beginning, but all this has been..." Eren trailed off, Levi knowing exactly which word he was going to use "Amazing?" "Yeah. I'm really happy we're here together" "That's the main thing. How are your knees?" "They're fine" "Really?" "They're a little sore, but it's nothing major. Anyway, you said there was more to this place?" "Yeah. You're going to have to wait and see though. I was only here that one time before, so I could be remembering wrong" "I don't mind if you do. Or have" "You're giving me permission to forget?" Eren laughed "No! I said it before, you could pretty much say anything and I'd believe you" "You have too much faith in me" "I don't think so. You're a good alpha... I know that" Opening his juice, Eren took a small sip. Levi didn't know what to say again... so they fell into silence until lunch was delivered. With their lunch sitting in front of them, Eren looked a little confused "What's wrong?" "There's so much" "I wanted to get a few things to try with you" "I know what the salad is, and the fish and chips, but the stuff on the end I'm not so sure about" "Hanji hasn't introduced you to nachos?" "No?" "The green stuff of spring onion. The white stuff is sour cream, under that you've got cheese, then mild salsa, followed by corn chips. I only got a small serving, so you could try it" "I think I want to try them first" "Nothing's stopping you" Eren looked incredibly awkward as he pulled a corn chip from the bottom, carefully making sure he had a little of everything, he leaned in as he took his first bite. Realising he was the cause of the omega's anxiety, he went about separating a small pile of chips for himself "It's... good. I can't imagine it's healthy" "It's not terribly, but don't think about it" "Today's about fun, right?" "Exactly. Would you get mad if I used some of the chips in the sour cream?" "Eren, you could pretty much start eating like a pig and I wouldn't get mad at you" "I would. I mean, I'd get mad at me. It took me ages to choose what to wear today. But then again, I do my own washing, so I suppose it's ok?" "Don't make a mess" Eren poked his tongue out, cream still coating his tongue and sending Levi's thoughts elsewhere "I won't" Eren ate more than he thought the kid would, but not nearly as much as Levi did. The alpha finishing off the nachos, left over seafood and enough of the salad to be ok with binning it. Recharged by lunch, Eren was bouncing in his seat, already looking around the terraced area "I take it you're ready to finish up?" "Yep! We should take selfies though" "Selfies?" "Yeah. I was thinking that we haven't got any photos of us together" Not waiting for his consent, Eren got up and rushed around the table, sitting next to him as he whipped out his phone "Only you would be crazy enough to want photos with me" "Shut up. Besides, I want to show Thomas" "Thomas?" "My therapist. Now smile" Glaring at the camera, Eren snorted as he took the selfie "I told you to smile" "I am?" "You're glaring" Elbowing him lightly, Eren the rested his head against Levi's shoulder. Obliging the omega, he smiled this time "This one looks nice" "You look nice" "Today was a really good day" "Yeah" Raising his head, Eren kissed his cheek as he snapped another photo, turning to kiss the brat, he ended up kissing Eren's forehead, the omega letting out a shaky breath "Levi, is this what a date's like?" "I would say so" "I think I like dating?" "We're not dating" "No, but I don't want to date anyone else" Wrapping his arm around Eren's waist, he leaned in and managed to actually kiss Eren's lips this time. A small thrill filled him when Eren didn't pull away. Sharing the tiny kiss, the omega blushed when it ended "I still really like you..." He could hear the "but" coming "But I don't think I'm ready for much more than this right now. More than kissing I mean" "That's ok" "Then... can I kiss you again?" Sharing another soft kiss, Eren whined as he broke it and hid his face against against Levi's shoulder "Eren?" "I don't want to lead you on, or make things weird" "You're not. You're a wonderful omega, and I'm proud of all the progress you've made. The last thing I want to do is make you feel rushed or pressured" "I know. That's what makes you such a good alpha. You're always so patient and kind. Even when you get cranky" "I don't get that cranky" "Not with me, usually" "This doesn't have to mean any more than it does" "What if I want it to?" "Then I'd tell you think about it" "I have. A lot. I like this. I like talking to you and spending time with you... I think I want to do it more often? I mean, if I'm not annoying you, or getting in your way. Because we both have work, and I have therapy, and I'm still trying to work on myself" "Why don't we just see how things go? We talk everyday, anyway" "That's because you're so patient" "Only for you" The blush on Eren's face was soft, his eyes wide and enquiring as he looked into Levi's "I'm not ready for sex" "That's fine. We're both going to have our good days and our bad days, but we'll keep working through it together" Eren hummed softly, his hand sliding down to take Levi's "I feel, um, maybe a bit more, um... hopeful" "Good" Down the stairs at the end of the veranda, was a walkway that looped back under the area. Eren promptly ran from his side to look through the glass and into the dam "What's supposed to be in here?" "I'm not sure, the last time I was here, the dam was actually used for rehabilitation" "So, injured animals?" "Other than being a public aquarium and museum, it also does a number of research projects" "That's so cool" The area now seemed more like a rest stop outside of the sun, leaning in, Eren's eyes narrowed "There's fish in there" "Fish in the water?" Giving an exaggerated sigh, Eren turned to face him "You're not funny" "Really?" "Maybe a little" "There might be plenty of fish in the sea, but I'm hooked on you" The omega groaned "I don't even know anything about fishing and I know that's awful" "I know another one, but I don't know if you'll hit me for it, or not?" "Now you have to tell me" "Ready?..." Eren nodded "... You're like a prized fish. Now that I've caught you, I want to take you home and mount you" Eren howled with laughter "Oh my god! Trust an alpha to say that! Oh, that's terrible..." "Nearly as good as your terrible pick-up lines" "My brain defaults to random shit when I can't think" "A glass to the side will do that" "It wasn't just that... it was you, and Hanji. Both of you just rushed over like it was the most natural thing in the world" "It's kind of our job" "But... I could never do anything like that" "I couldn't dance in front of a room full of people" "It's fun... and it's not the worse job in the world" "I suppose not" At the lack of anything overly interesting in the dam, they walked back up, walking through the side of the cafe and into the gift shop "Wow..." "You can't buy everything" "Probably not... but I want to buy you something, so go away, but not too far" "You don't need to buy me something" "I want to. We should pick something up for Hanji and Moblit too" They'd been so close before falling into the tourist trap. The prices were always verging on ridiculous. Still, Eren was excited, so he kept his mouth shut. Not allowed to see what he was being gifted, Eren paid for his purchases before rejoining him over near the glass works display "Did you find anything?" "I was looking at the shot glasses, you know what Hanji's like" "I like the dolphin. But the fish thing is cool too" "The paperweight?" "Is that what the big ball thing is?" "Yeah. It's for holding papers down" "I guessed that much. And if Hanji falls pregnant soon, she's not going to be able to drink" "That's true" "I think maybe just the set of two normal glasses? The ones that say Shinganshima?" The design printed on them was the same whale as painted on the front of the building. They were actually tumblers, but that was just being picky "Alright. But you have to go away" "What? Why?" "So I can get you something" Eren rolled his eyes "You brought me here. That's like way more than enough" "Nope. Go wait over where I can keep an eye on you" "Levi, you don't need to get me anything" "Not up for argument" Pouting, Eren dragged his feet as he went to stand near the turnstile that lead back into the main entry area. Scowling at him until he turned around, Levi snorted to himself, before realising he didn't know what to buy his? omega. Eren was his now? Well, not his. The omega owned his own body, but they'd kissed and agreed to take things slowly. Maybe jewellery? Alphas usually bought their omega courting gifts, though most of the time it was more to warn other alphas off... they weren't like that... yet... picking the pack of tumblers off the shelf, he naturally picked up the glass dolphin too. Given he'd half kept an eye on Eren, he knew he hadn't ventured near the jewellery, and trinkety things in the glass display case under the counter. Walking over, he nearly found two perfect gifts right away. A small goldy coloured cat fish on a keychain, a small gold turtle pendant with a turquoise stone in the middle of its shell, on a slim gold chain. Both. Both would be good. He didn't have to give Eren the turtle right away, where as the cat fish would probably make him laugh. Paying the $121.75 for the three items, he mentally winced. Fucking tourist scammers. Slipping the necklace into his pocket, he carried the glasses and keychain over to Eren "All good?" "Yep. Here, I got you this" Sliding the keychain off Eren snorted "Nice. Very nice. Levi the angry catfish" Lifting it up, Eren scrunched his nose up "He doesn't look that angry" "He's kind of adorable. Thank you" "You're welcome. Are you ready to go?" "Yep. You have to wait until later for your gift" "I don't know if I should be nervous or not" "Definitely nervous" "Come on, brat. We still have shopping to do" "And a nap. I want to take a nap too" "You can nap all you like once we get home again" "Will you stay?" "You want me to stay?" "You don't have to, but I thought we could make dinner together?" "I'd like that. I've got work tomorrow at 4am, so I can't stay up all night" "I don't mind. I just want to spend more time with you" Fuck it. Call a priest. This was the omega he was marrying.

[cosmosogler]

hello friends. 

last night i had a dream that i was being drafted onto a fishing boat “until september.” this fishing boat was too small for the crew and had no actual rooms or cabins. it was basically a raft with a steering wheel and a sail. 

i had to wait in line to get on the boat. i’m not sure why. the other people weren’t getting on the boat. also the line was in a river. so i was getting super soggy and uncomfortable.

the dream took place near the, uh, dream port. there are several ports that appear in my dreams. judging from the sun’s position while traveling there previously it should be to the east, but the sun usually doesn’t work right in my dreams. and the stars always are in the wrong places, or the wrong color, or there is something bizarre and out of place in the sky. it seriously freaks me out. i don’t know why it’s so scary, but it inspires the same level of absolute terror in me that, say, a monster would.

when i put my alarm on snooze i not only managed to fall back asleep, but i had an entire dream in the span of about 20 minutes. it was another “episode” of “steven universe.” these dreams are often a little more violent but less, i guess, horrible for me. the emotion i most often experience in these dreams is confusion, usually brought on by “wait a second. the characters are here, but this isn’t the show at all.” i am not usually able to recognize that with other fictional characters that show up.

most of that dream (after a surprisingly violent and gruesome scene-setter) was spent laying around on a tiny spaceship. it was basically a space raft with a steering wheel and a sail.

you know who i dream about a lot? the ninja turtles. i only saw like two episodes of the 1980s cartoon. but it’s always in that style. i am not even that interested in the show. i mean, i like it, but i don’t love it. 

there was someone else in my dream. kind of lurking and not participating. i recognized them from several other dreams, but i don’t remember who it was.

anyway i got up and showered and colored for a while and neglected some chores. i forgot to get the box. i will try to remember tomorrow. then i went to make some oatmeal and discovered that the whole box expired in like 2015. i found one container that was still in date so i tried to eat that. i managed to get the whole thing down, but my stomach was not happy about it at all. then i went to group.

i actually talked for a while this time! i quibbled about my guilty feelings and my relationship with my mother. my group mates tried to reassure me a little bit, but i noticed that by the end of the session i couldn’t remember what they had said at all. my brain does a good job of snuffing out compliments and useful advice. i will have to start bringing some note paper. 

i mean... i got the old “you’re very smart,” and the “you’re a good person,” and i can’t seem to bring myself to believe those things. i think it might be related to the guilt thing. where if i start thinking “i’m a good person” i’ll get, complacent i guess? i would stop trying to be a better person. i don’t know why this would be the case, but it is my fear. in order to keep striving for something i have to tell myself i haven’t reached it yet. or that the goal doesn’t mean anything. i need an even higher goal.

what might help is rephrasing these goals into an ongoing habit rather than a description of my personality. i practice being kind. i practice thinking hard. i practice being creative.

that way there is no goal! there is just a habit/skill that i want to have and continue having. the same as “i practice drawing.” i just got to want to practice something and then... start doing it, i guess.

but i need to figure out what it is i want to practice in order to stop feeling like a garbage person, and if practicing that is really going to stop me from feeling like a garbage person.

anyway, i got home and watched some youtube vids and played with the dogs a little bit. mom left for a concert so i ordered pizza for dinner for myself and my brother... gettin tired of pizza again. while i waited for the delivery i sat downstairs and colored more. then i had some pizza, which was really painful actually. then i took wiley for a walk! we were out about, i don’t know, it seemed like 35 minutes. it wasn’t nearly as long as yesterday.

when i got home i looked at a few more videos and then i colored for another, like, hour and a half while i talked to one of the people on the discord channel i frequent. he was having some problems so i decided i had enough energy to talk about it and tried to listen and ask questions instead of give advice. i don’t know if i succeeded. i am getting really bad at interacting with people again... i forgot how to be a friend.

i seem to have misplaced my emotions for relating to other people. maybe it is because i was feeling lonely and got numb about it? or maybe tonight i am just burned out from therapy. i was a little concerned about it last night too though. i think about people i care about, i know i care about them, but i don’t feel the emotions i labeled as “caring” or “fondness.” i just feel nothing. 

it’s not as bad with the dogs... i think it helps that i see them every day. i see wiley and i think, “that’s wiley. i care about him. he seems well.” and i feel a little less sad, but not more happy. maybe hanging out with asher tomorrow will help a little bit too. though he is leaving for canada again on friday, so i won’t see him for three or four weeks after that. i will have to look elsewhere for companionship.

i was thinking about maybe getting in touch with some of the people in my group, but i am not sure about the type of relationship i should build with them. it depends on how i approach bonding i guess. i don’t want a student/mentor sort of friendship, but i know that will be really hard to avoid if i help them with homework, and also i am much older. and if we become facebook friends i know i am never going to actually hang out with them in person.

i hope i am being vague enough to protect their privacy... i avoid talking about what they bring up, but the stuff i bring up i usually want to write more about in the journal here, so i just kind of mention that there are other people present...

i finished coloring the picture. i will scan it tomorrow probably. i have a lot to do in the morning. i need to call my doctor about one last test she wants to do, i need to put together a list of people i want to invite to my graduation party in july before i leave for grad school, i need to find a jar for the anxiety box, and i need to go to goodwill to get cosplay materials. then in the afternoon i’m gonna hang out with asher and we will maybe get indian food using the coupon the nice waiters gave me several weeks ago. it is a raffle style coupon, so i don’t actually know what i will get a discount on until i bring it back to them to open.

last time we went i forgot to bring it and asher teased me that the waiter had a certain look when he gave me the coupon which means it must be the grand prize of a free meal. i wouldn’t mind getting to know him better. but we don’t interact nearly enough to warrant asking for his facebook details.

i also need to finish the homework i got from group today and look over the materials we got. friday will hopefully not be too busy, i might cook something, but on saturday i am going to raven’s graduation party. and then on sunday i am hanging out with linda and david again for a few hours. hopefully i won’t have any time to get depressed!!

[purplepixel]

CW // Implied Major Injury, Discussions of Death

Disclaimer: I am not a therapist and neither is Mikey despite what he might think. I do not know the answer to Donnie's question. But I do know that one should cherish the people in the their life and that your feelings are valid.

There are things I would change to this animatic, but I refuse to touch it. I created this last year in a 6 day art binge listening to a lyrical cover of Davy Jones locker on loop while my mom was in the hospital recovering from her open heart surgery.

Happy to say that one year later, she hiked upper/lower Yosemite falls, vernal and Nevada falls, plus all the little hikes with me and the fam over the weekend. :]

Part 1 | Part 2

#its wild to see my work one year ago vs now #when you draw turtles instead of going to therapy #youtube video is unlisted #it was too big for tumblr #pixels tortle art #pixels animations #rottmnt fanart #rottmnt #rise donnie #rise mikey #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt animation #tmnt #rottmnt animatic #donnie #mikey #pbj duo #smarts and crafts

[redperil]

@justicetempered​ asked: “You just don’t know when to quit.”

>> MEMES | ACCEPTING

Seeing him had been a slap to the face.

The war was long past, years of faded time and darker times at that. Illya had learnt to ignore the pictures and the talks, Napoleon and Gabrielle - they were a good reason to move past it all. But this one. This American. 

Everything about him is a time capsule of spit and fury. He wears his old uniform like the slaughter of people is pride, he talks like he knows war as if he was not a puffed up little pincushion for the politicians. 

Napoleon misses his shirt, Gabrielle does not even bother to try and stop him and when his fists connects it is very satisfying. A deep groove to his knuckles that he shakes out and moves into, swinging again with nothing but the want to swipe that glory smug right off of him. 

He has the audacity to look surprised, their Steve Rogers but beneath that he sees the truth of him. He see’s the way he lights up for it, bares his teeth and enjoys the challenge. Not so pure when you want for violence is it? 

The punch hurts but he is accustomed to that. Gives a harsh breath before shrugging it off with a slight twitch of a smirk in answer to the cocky way he dances about. Little ballerina blue, and his fancy footwork. That is what they teach keeps them alive? No wonder he fell in ice.

“I wouldn’t stop him if I was you. You friend can defend himself just fine, getting between Illya and hit therapy is like poking a bear.” 

He does little to register the talk of his superiors to the Avengers behind him because Steve is kicking and he is dropping before twisting to the side. Aiming for ankles as they go. There is no finesse to it, he is not foolish enough to take on an enhanced and expect it to be a pretty picture, no. What he expects is for Steve to stop talking about HYDRA as if he has any idea how he sounds. 

He is caught not by little bunny moves but a head against his, momentarily startled by it enough to find himself under the other, bucking his hips up to try and throw him off, glare dark in return to another's. 

You just don’t know when to quit.

What a stupid thing to say. Enough that he breaks a laugh instead of the snarl that was building, wondering if all of his fights get such ridiculous monologuing. 

“I guess we do have something in common after all.” 

Sarcasm is something that comes easily, enough to draw his breath in. Forcing him still for a moment as he is met with equal strength and a furious hold looking to stop clawing fists. In the scuffle that helmet had come off, lost and dropped alongside the shield. A good old fashioned fist fight, fair, honest and for a moment he does not see the poster picture that quoted the lives of so many but he sees someone who has fought just as hard as he had to stay alive.

Illya’s muscles remain tense, eyes dark as he glares up at him wanting again to overlap it. Annoyed by how rogers makes little move to take advantage of the position and inflict more harm. How many times had he pulled this? The idiot should be dead. 

Yet he holds and Illya’s steadies his chest, giving a few beats of question to the way that Steve gets comfortable straddling him to immobilise him. If he lets go Illya well enough could hit again, but what was he going to do? Spark a war with UNCLE for harming an agent? Curious to find themselves at an impasse.

Part of him whispers to buck him off and brain him with his own little turtle shield but whatever had caught Rogers attention had him distracted, staring at Illya odd and personal. Amusing, did he realise they had once fought before? At a laboratory where all Russians looked the same to a blind little patriot. Or was it just the predicament of having an ally under him who happily cut his throat in his sleep. 

“Are you comfortable up there, flag boy?” 

#&&. illya | do not question my methods! | in character #| no one #illya: im gonna fucking punch captain america in the face | #| napoleon in the bg: just let it happen | #&&. verse | marvel

[shauntemcelroy-blog]

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Michael Keaton made the same blunder as Jenna - and on a much greater phase - however he really did not shed any kind of rips for the mistake. In my THIRTEEN years as a Rhode Isle Kid Guardianship Attorney, I have viewed several daddies and also mommies make inane and also stupid decisions throughout the training program of Rhode Isle Child Protection Proceedings. Make a list of the celebrations coming from your life that you remain to emphasize as well as can't seem to allow go from. For each occasion, make a note of exactly what your error was, just what you profited from this mistake, as well as one thing positive you have today because of the scenario. When an individual rifles with your waste can easily appearing for credit score card claims or even just what have you, the majority of folks image identity theft as one thing that happens. Using terms like visit here" or learn more" in inner hyperlinks is a major mistake due to the fact that the internet search engine fail to know what the page being connected is actually about. I have expanded to strongly believe that our team are actually all ideal simply the method our company are actually which features our blunders. Still, this is not where most identifications are actually stolen and this is a significant error to presume that simply protecting your personal things can easily produce a major variation in your identification burglary threat. Already it was practically impossible for me to track down the identification and place of the pet dog proprietor so I had to drop the situation (which I thought possessed a settlement deal worth of a minimum of $50,000 to $75,000). Another usual mistake made by those that are actually attempting to improve their look is thinking that they need to possess the most basic. The third blunder is that as quickly as the firm experiences a tough time, they reduced their advertising budget plan and also take inside their shell like a turtle. As well as if you do possess a person in your life that is attempting to maintain you coming from failing to remember and also removaling on, discover that this is their own globe they are producing and also they could take pleasure in securing those sensations and ideas from past oversights over you. That's why most entrants (and dieters) wind up getting back their initial weight As our experts've stated before: fitness is actually a capability So as to definitely advance, you'll must fall words mistake coming from your lexicon to make sure that you can completely transform inside. When it comes to possessing highly effective communication is actually that they are actually certainly not mindful from their body intonation, vocal or even foreign language variation, the very first typical mistake folks make. Here are seven common mistakes that gets a degree create in their resume and must avoid this. Oversights massage counselors often make are to either fall into a routine where they give the very same massage therapy time and time again, or to ignore the client's requests for tension/ emphasis and also instead just concentrate on just what the therapist believes is essential. When you make a mistake, the greatest thing to carry out is admit it and try to counterbalance it; not excusing a mistake is one more mistake. Each opportunity you think about a blunder you have actually created, this is actually as if you're creating that error all over once more. This challenge, featured listed below, is actually going popular considering that it's helped make many smarty-pants think that simpletons. You draw in to your lifestyle what you pay attention to. Thinking about your oversights will not protect you coming from creating future errors. Placed a lot more records points out there certainly to restore their count on if that created people examine your expertise. When there is a product mistake concerning a component facet of the contract, the necessary reason from the arrangement, there is actually the question from the expectation from the threat. Sometimes blunders are actually relatively minor and also cause very little damages or aggravation. The listing may continue. However, my experience as a card-carrying member of the POPULAR CULTURE carries me to the final thought that the quintessential blunder is actually the faux . Allow on your own to fantasize and think major, take a chance something deserving, create bunches of oversights in the process-- and fill your understanding carton to the verge! Plenty of individuals hesitate to also have a couple of sure things because they may trigger a mistake." So they don't make an effort just about anything brand new. Anyone that has ever had the guts to head out in to the world as well as perform something knows there are actually only pair of type of mistakes: ones our team can easily recover coming from and also ones our company may not recoup from. To locate the very best remedies to mistakes when setting up marble floor ceramic tiles discussed in this short article, you can do thus below. And also consistently, 100% of the amount of time, I brought in the examination costs back in renegotiations with the property owner. That is actually always prudent to find out and correct the mistakes prior to the final represent the year are actually made. The next blunder a bunch of individuals create is actually that they don't offer on their own the approval to be that they wish to be. A considerable amount of folks possess dreams about who they would like to be and they may also stand in front of the mirror and also visualize being actually a really awesome and also hassle-free individual occasionally, I think this will be fairly sure to say that almost everybody has actually stargazed regarding a situation where they handled everything flawlessly and spared the day. If you haven't made any sort of oversights for some time, you may certainly not be actually providing on your own options to jeopardize, to find out, or even to expand. Writers, Bloggers, Podcasters & Artists: Helping you certainly not simply create & nourish a spent target market, but how to take advantage of your oversights so you switch all of them into your most significant endorsers however. Self-Care: Typical massage blunders counselors make are that they carry out not look after themselves as long as they should. Error # 7 - Settling your insurance claim too soon, or even appearing too anxious to resolve your case soon. . After that there are actually the private oversights that some people bring around for a life time; their grimy little bit of secrets. Yet our company did certainly not attain just what our team preferred, and significant oversights were created in attempting to accomplish this. We will obtain to the bottom of this, and I will have whatever activity is actually asked for An entrepreneur will actually have to operate more challenging due to the absence of a business identity. Oversights exist to motivate us and motivate our team to keep removaling and always keep supplying our Heart and also our mind-- to maintain residing! Youngsters must end up being relaxed in creating mistakes and also taking responsibility in help to fix whatever occurred. You need to avoid these often committed oversights in if you want your internet site to appear among the leading 10 sites in SERPs online search engine marketing. Once more, there's no justification for this blunder - as well as that is actually one that will establish you other than the others in your industry. This only celebrated its own l lth wedding anniversary as well as created it through the current decline with very few hiccups. When searching at independent oversight, one have to first identify between mechanical computations and company inaccuracy. Visit - or select the following link to receive home owners insurance policy estimates coming from top-rated providers as well as see just how much you could conserve.

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DOTW 14 start

Hanji was reluctant to let him go to his new job on his own. The woman had gently tried to talk him out of it, but that was only because she didn't understand that he wanted to work as a dancer for himself. He wanted to feel sexy and confident again. He wanted to know that he had a hold over every single alpha in the room, while none of them could touch him. Sure the costumes sucked most of the time, and the money wasn't that great, but he loved dancing. He didn't feel dirty or like he wasn't good enough when he was on stage. He was a complete different person, the kind of person he wished he could be in real life. He was strong and unattainable. He could hold his head high and proudly boast that this was his body. Dressing carefully, he braided his hair down the right side, letting it hang loosely, before catching the end up in a messy bun. His makeup was bright blue into a soft green, while his lips were a matt red. He looked good. This job was exactly what he needed to distract him how pathetic his omega side was being over Marco's pregnancy. Since his heats had started at the tender age of 8, his omega was angered that Marco, who's heat's started at 16, was pregnant before him. That his friend would be going through all of this before he got a chance to. He'd been so mixed up and confused by his restless omega side, that he hadn't even been able to talk to Levi about it all, or just in general. He didn't even know if Levi wanted kids, let alone kids with him. He knew the man struggled to always make his feelings known the way he'd intended, much like himself, so he'd forced himself not to text him, incase he said something he'd later regret. Coming downstairs, Hanji sighed as he walked into the living area "You look nice" "I know" "You know..." "Hanji, please" "I'm just worried for you" "It'll all be ok. I worked for two years before I fell off the stage that time. I know what I'm doing" "I know you so. And I know you're strong, and that you can take care of yourself. It's just... all a bit sudden" "Like I said, I got a call from someone I used to dance with, and their club needed a new dancer" The lie rolled smoothly off his tongue. It wasn't like he'd never danced with Zeke, so it wasn't all a lie. And. If Zeke was the one behind the job, he'd be safe. His brother wouldn't let him get hurt "You should at least let me drive you" "They're picking me up. I promise to text you if anything goes wrong" "And you trust them?" "I've known them for years" "Ok... Have a good time" "I will. I've missed dancing so much..." "Just make sure you don't over tax your ankle" "I promise not to undo all your hard work" Hanji finally climbed off the sofa, walking over to him, she pulled him into a tight hug "I'm sorry for being overbearing" "You're just worried about me. I know. Thank you" "Your rides been out the front for like 5 minutes now. You better go" "Yeah. I don't know my hours yet, so I'll probably be home late" "You've got you keys, right?" "Yep" "Then you'll be ok" Prying Hanji off him, the woman wiped at her eyes "I feel like a proud mum sending her baby off to school" "You know I'm 20, and a stripper right?" "Fine. I feel like a proud mum who's sending her 20 year old off to be an exotic dancer" Eren grinned happily, Hanji having wrinkled her face at her own words "That's better. I'll see you later" * "What's an aquarium?" Blinking at the simple message from Eren, he smiled to himself. Some people might wake up to a "Good Morning", but from Eren, it was almost always a question. By the looks of it, the kid had sent it at some ungodly hour when Eren should have definitely been asleep Levi - "Good morning to you too. It's what you keep fish in. Ack-wear-ee-um" Meowing at the fact his human was awake, Titan came flying up on his bed, knocking his phone from his hand as he began to meow for breakfast "Yes, I know. I'm a terrible person for letting you spend hours and hours foodless while I slept" It wasn't like the cat didn't have an auto-feeder. The kind where the biscuits sat in the plastic drum and were lowered as they disappeared from the attached bowl. Titan yowled his agreement, while Levi's phone chimed. It was still stupid o'clock in the morning. Bundling Titan under one arm, he grabbed his phone Eren - "How do you go on a date at one then? If it's just a tank?" Levi - "If it's a date, it'll be at the public aquarium. They have fish, sharks, turtles and shit" His phone dinged as he climbed from his bed, dropping Titan down to the floor. The kid would have to wait until he'd shat, showered and shaved. With his morning routine taken care of, Levi settled down at his small dining table. His usual cup of tea accompanied by two slices of toast. He knew he really should care more about his diet, but cooking large meals for himself seemed like too much work. Picking up his phone, he pulled up Eren's message Eren - "That makes more sense. Marco took Jean there on a date to tell him he's pregnant" The horse-faced arsehole was going to be a father? He knew Marco was special to Eren, but his taste in alphas was awful Levi - "Tell him congrats from me" Eren - "I will. Have you been to an aquarium before?" Levi - "In college. Hanji's brilliant idea" Eren didn't reply straight away, nor had he replied by the time he'd finished his breakfast. He didn't think he'd said anything wrong, or anything that could upset Eren. Even after texting back and forth for weeks, he still got nervous when Eren didn't reply straight away. He'd told himself friends texted, but he and Eren texted off and on almost all day, if he wasn't working or exhausted. The omega seemed to just magically know when he was. The kid had so many questions about everything, yet he didn't find it annoying. Some omegas accepted their lot in lives, but Eren was striving to better educate himself. Checking his phone when he got to work, he found Eren still hadn't replied. Throwing the device back up on the dash, he let a small sigh of annoyance. Not with Eren, instead at his own feelings of annoyance "Everything alright?" "Yeah. Maybe. I was talking to Eren, but he didn't reply" Erwin snorted lightly "Don't give me that" "I didn't say anything" "You snorted" "I was just thinking its unusual for you to be so focused on your phone" "I'm helping Eren out" "Oh?" "There's lots he doesn't know about, so he asks me what things mean" "Ah. Hanji said he'd been spending most of his time reading lately. He carries the book almost everywhere he goes. I suppose you're to blame?" "He wanted to learn to read, so I bought him a copy of "The Chronicles of Narnia", any words he doesn't understand, he messages me over" "So what was the word this morning?" "Aquarium. Jean and Marco went on a date there. The horsefaced arseholes going to be a father" "Marco's pregnant?" "Yeah. Eren asked me if I've ever been, but didn't reply when I said I had" "You mean when Hanji decided it would be so much fun if we got drunk and snuck in" "It still counts" "And he stopped replying?" "Pretty much. Nothing" "Maybe he wanted you to take him?" Levi rolled his eyes "Right" "He could have just asked Marco what he meant, but he asked you" "Marco probably texted him" "Mhmmm" Bringing his leg up, he kicked Erwin in the side "Hey! I'm trying to drive here" "Then don't be an arsehole" "I'm just saying, if you asked him, I'm sure he'd love to go with you" "That's too much like a date" "Would it be so bad? He seems to be in a better place now. He's working again. He's learning to read. He's going to therapy" "Working?" "Didn't he tell you? Hanji called me about last week. Eren's got a new job dancing again" No. The brat hadn't told him... Why hadn't he told him? He didn't like Eren doing such a dangerous job, but it was Eren's choice. Eren had no obligation to tell him... but it just wasn't like him "You really didn't know?" "No, but what he does is his business" "You're glaring again" Kicking Erwin again, he huffed, before drawing his leg back "Don't be like that. He might have just wanted to surprise you" "It's none of my business" "The way you've been attached to your phone says otherwise" "You're an arsehole" "Message him and ask him to the aquarium. I guarantee you won't regret it..." Eren would probably love it. The kid's eyes would go wide at the sheer number of fish, and all the colours. Shit. That'd be pretty fucking adorable "..and you know he's home alone until Sunday, right?" Moblit's mother was having surgery on her hip, Hanji and Moblit had flown out to spend the week with her "I'm sure Hanji and Moblit would love me hanging out with Eren, completely unsupervised" "You make it sound like he's their underage son" "He practically is. Hanji's completely smitten with him. She's got framed photos of him up on the mantle now" "That sounds about right for her" She didn't last time he was there. He would have noticed... so Erwin had been there since he had? Eren hadn't told him that... He thought they'd been getting closer, but maybe it'd all been in his head "You should ask him" "And you should shut up. I still haven't forgiven you for that shit with Petra. Do you know how stubborn Olou can be? He totally "forgot" the paperwork I needed because he was mad at me"