#which goes against all of my moral and ethical beliefs. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

prettyboykatsuki · 1 year

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I NEED YOU EXCITED, I DON'T WANNA FIGHT IT | Y. OKKOTSU

✵ tags ; established relationship, friends to lovers, afab +fem!reader, forward!reader, back and forth power dynamics, dry-humping, hickies / marking, cunnilingus, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms, riding. fingering, dirty talk, 18+

✵ wc ; 7.3k (good lord)

✵ a/n ; written with my beloved @princess-okkotsu in mind!! i hope i did your boy justice </3 and thank u for everything literally wouldn't have passed chem w/o you

so not used to have such little warnings on a fic. lol. title is from fire and desire by drake.

✵ synopsis ; yuta wants to do right by you which is why he's so determined to take your relationship slowly. well, he tries too, anyway.

Yuta Okkotsu is a believer of doing things the right way.

He repeats this to himself like a mantra as he hangs out alone in your bedroom. He closes his eyes, elbows resting on the little table, face buried in his palms. Maybe it’s closer to a form of manifestation - like if he says it with enough hooplah it will mean something more than a jumble of words and syllables.

He must clarify that he is trying to do the right thing right now. He is trying so very hard to do the right thing because Yuta Okkotsu wants to remain righteous where possible.

It’s part of his job as a sorcerer, now well into his 20’s and more conscious of the world around him. He’s strong enough to put his money where his mouth is and experienced enough to know that trying to maintain some ethical code is part of staying alive in this business.

And it’s not that Yuta considers himself particularly upright. His friends and colleagues often tell him that he’s a bit unhinged and hard to get a read on. His morals might not always align with greater society, but he never does something that goes against his own beliefs. A lot of which can be summarized quite easily ; anything to defend his comrades.

It really is so important for Yuta to try and be civil in these aspects. Lest he fall into something truly dark. Even he knows what he’s capable of, at least a little.

That’s why he’s left with no choice than burying all of his thoughts of you and using every ounce of energy he has to suppress it as deep as it can go

You know, with all the love that’s influenced his life and all of the years he’s spent learning to be less timid - none of it seems to matter when it comes down to you and him. The logistics of a relationship and the idea of one are two very different things. When it comes to your relationship, he’s been keen in adhering to his strict timeline of milestones. First date, first hand-holding, first deep kiss. It’s a matter of honoring you - because before being boyfriend and girlfriend, you were Yuta’s comrade and companion. Before your relationship status, you're his cherished and valued person.

So because he’s chivalrous. Because he’s romantic. Because he cares about you.

And also because the sheer magnitude of his desires for you perpetually leaves him in a state of distress and disarray. It’s all of the above, all at the same time. And sometimes it leaves him a little overwhelmed.

He barely manages in his daily life but this? This is torturous.

Being in your bedroom unprompted is destroying every ounce of self-restraint he’s built through these last three months. He’s made it through your relentless bullying without giving into his Earthly desires.

It’s just too ideal in a way, being in here. Everything feels like you. There’s pictures of your friends and family around the room. Everything has your scent. Your clothes are littered on the floor and hung over the back of your desk-chair. It’s so you and Yuta loves you and he’s not going to survive being in here despite it all.

It’s embarrassing. Yuta is not the timid teenager he once was. But for all the ways he’s good at standing his ground, his demeanor is all but worthless when it comes down to you.

You’re a few years his senior and you’ve always been a slippery character. He’s enriched by your curiosity of the world. You’re a researcher and archivist of cursed information, coming out of the Kyoto branch. You have plenty of accolades and always manage to teach him something new and come out of difficult things on top.

Mostly, Yuta recognizes all of the good in your heart. He really thinks very highly of you.

There was an obvious passion for your work that Yuta was endeared by in the initial stages of your relationship. Plus you were easy to talk to. You’ve been a good friend to Yuta for years now, ever since you called on him to do some research on him and Rika. And, as the years passed you became closer until one night it hit him that his feelings of admiration were a little closer to something like love.

And with big, wet tears in his eyes (and a fair bit of liquor in his system) he blubbered about his feelings for you. He isn’t sure what reaction he was expecting at the time. You were happy which was great, but there was also something so lax about it all. Yuta remembers it so vividly. The way you waltzed up to him, tucked some hair behind his ears and kissed him gingerly with all the confidence in the world. Like it mattered but it didn’t. Like nothing could be more obvious than your feelings for each other.

“I’m pretty crazy about you too, Okkotsu-san.”

After asking if that meant you were dating like the bumbling, lovesick fool he is - you officially began going out as a couple. And at first, it was smooth sailing. It wasn’t too different from your usual hangouts.

Eventually though, you had pointed out that it doesn’t really feel like you were dating. Suggested that maybe sleeping together would help break the ice a little. That was what started this moral dilemma.

Being honest, it wasn’t like Yuta hadn’t considered it. What thoughts he cooked up while alone in the sanctity of his bedroom is between him and the heavens only. It was just the way you suggested it. You saying it made it all feel so real. And Yuta wasn’t sure how to deal with that. He wants to cherish you so much that he felt like he couldn’t consider your offer too lightly.

And he told you as much, hand in yours and red-faced to which you only blew some hair out of his eyes and laughed. A simple okay, a nod, and a kiss.

Of course, if everything had been smooth sailing this would be a different thing altogether. While Yuta had declined sleeping with you too soon, you had absolutely no plans to make his life easy. He’s not sure how much of it is on purpose. Knowing you, probably a lot. You’re a smart girl, after all.

So all of your bending over and tongue kissing before going home and selfies that just border on boudoir are probably very purposeful. But he’s endured it all. He should cherish you more. He’s been determined to not give in.

The fact he’s all but ready to blow his load over just being in your room makes him feel pathetic. And maybe he is, a little. But only for you.

Yuta likes to think of himself as a collected individual. Really. He knows being this worked up over something as innocuous as his girlfriends room is ridiculous. He knows he’s being ridiculous.

But he really, really wants to uphold his beliefs here. So he’s stiff, sitting with his hands clasped and holding it together just barely.

He practically jumps out of his skin when you return to your room with a tray of refreshments.

“Woah, Yuta. You okay?”

He turns around to look at you. A mistake, apparently. His eyes land on the sight of your bare legs before he forces himself to meet your eyes. You’re so pretty to him. Always so beautiful without any effort.

“Huh? Yeah. Sorry, just got lost in thought.”

You put the tray down on the table in front of him before sitting on the edge of your bed - facing him. The distance between you is minimal. You reach out to pet the top of his head with the palm of your hand, scratching his jaw tenderly. Yuta feels loved by the touch.

“You sure? Looks like you saw a ghost.”

Your genuine worry makes his spine feel like it’ll melt. He puts his hands over yours, rubbing his cheek against your palm.

“Promise I’m okay. Just—it's nothing serious.”

“Mm. Even if it’s nothing serious, I wanna know what stuff you’re worried about, ‘kay? So tell me if you want.”

He feels unsteady but so happy.

“Thank you, my love.”

“Yeah, of course. You wanna keep sitting on the floor or…?”

The minute you ask him, he feels the hair stand up on his neck.

“The bed…?”

You give him a look of confusion before you break out into a knowing grin.

“Oh, I forgot. I mean to remain chaste, my liege. Just wanna cuddle a bit.”

“Are you making fun of me?” He asks, not masking the pout in his voice.

You tilt your head to one side, leaning back on your palms.

“A little,” You say mischievously, shrugging “I’m used to your lifestyle of celibacy.”

He frowns at you. “It’s not like that, I just want to—“

“I just want to cherish you because I love you and want you for more than sex yadda yadda yadda. I know. And I respect your wishes even if I think it’s silly.” You say, taking the words right out of his mouth. His frown deepens.

“It’s not silly to me.” He says, almost petulantly. At this, you grab his face in your hands which catches him off-guard. You knock your forehead against his, bent over to do it.

“I know that too, you dummy. The point is that I’m not trying to get in your pants right now.”

He can’t help but smile, pulling away to kiss at your wrist. You giggle.

“Well, what do you want?”

“To be wrapped up in each other like otters.”

“So romantic.”

“Right? So get up here.”

He gives in sooner rather than later. You scoot till your back is along the wall next to your bed and Yuta wastes no more time in joining you. Your bed is crazy comfortable. Just laying it in makes him want to fall asleep almost immediately. He gets cozy before directing his gaze to you in front of him. He feels like he’s gonna throw up and the only thing that’ll come out is his heart. You give him a look of amusement.

“Enjoying the view?” You tease. He laughs, leaning forward to tuck his face into your neck.

“Yeah. Smells like you,”

“So cute.”

“Don’t know how to feel about being called cute.” He says honestly. He peers up at you and you’re giggling and he can feel his heart rate sky-rocket. You twirl a piece of his hair around your index finger.

“You’re cute and cool and handsome. Better?”

“Yeah. Yes.”

“Mm,” You respond. He looks at you as your expression drifts off somewhere. He can’t take his eyes away from your face “Sorry you had to stay over.”

“It’s fine. It’d be a shame if you didn’t get anything to look over while we were there. If you make any breakthroughs, it’d be good for Gojo-sensei.”

“You still call him that even though you graduated so many years ago?”

He flushes slightly.

“Force of habit. My point stands.”

“Mhm. Thanks for being so supportive. I didn’t think it was that late, y’know? I would’ve tried to hurry if I knew,” You say thoughtfully “But I like having you over.”

He gives you a once over as he pulls away, eyes flitting to your lips. You give him a small grin.

“Kiss me.”

He looks at you apologetically.

“That’s not fair. We can’t kiss? Making out doesn’t count as intimate relations, Yuta.”

“Okay, but it can lead to them.”

“If it’s that serious, I’ll sleep on the couch.”

“Wait, no.”

“Then kiss me.”

He sighs.

“Just kissing, okay?”

“Okay, you monk.”

He laughs at the comment before pressing his lips to yours tenderly. You have no such intent of leaving it that way - your hand on immediately on the nape of his neck. The softness of your tongue makes Yuta feel like there’s fizz in his head - like the water inside of him is seltzer. He thought you would at least try to give him some mercy.

He probably shouldn’t expect that from his favorite girl. He pulls away, out of breath. A little line of saliva breaks off between you. Your grin is eye-catching, like glass in the sun. Yuta wouldn’t mind burning in the magnitude of your light.

“Just kissing,” He emphasizes, trying to be firm. You hum, hand on his cheek. You rub your thumb on his lip tenderly, looking at him square in the eyes. He’s stronger than this, he swears.

“We are just kissing though?”

“Baby.” He frowns. A laugh bubbles up from your stomach and he’s so entranced by it he nearly forgets what he’s trying to convince you of.

“Since when is making out too naughty? Teenagers do stuff like that, Yuta. We’re grown-ups.”

“That’s the whole problem.” He says back in faux exasperation. You look like you’re going to kiss him again, but you lean into his ear instead. Your breath is warm and ticklish against his skin.

“Yuta,” You murmur with such clear intent he feels himself break down under the weight “Can’t we have sex, hm?”

Blood rushes down to his dick so fast he’s embarrassed. He stares at you as you pull away, a look in your eyes that makes him want to collapse. Of course he does. He wants to have so much sex with you so often it’s starting to drive him up a wall. Is there anyone in the world other than him masochistic enough to turn down the offer? He’s doubtful to say the least.

“I want to,” He admits. You beam and nod. Your hand slides down to squeeze his waist. He swallows thickly.

“Yeah? Then why can’t we?”

“I just..don’t want to rush things,” He replies with as much conviction as he possibly can. The sincerity must reach you because you soften a little “We’ve known each other for a long time. And it was already hard to get here. I just want to make sure it’s right.”

“You’re so thoughtful,” You murmur to him, running over his hip bone with your thumb “And that makes you really sexy, you know?”

“What if it gets all messed up?”

“Our relationship is stronger than that, yeah. It can withstand a handjob.”

He groans at your vulgarity before laughing.

“I’m being serious!”

“I know and that’s so sweet of you. But I really, really don’t think it’ll be that bad if we have sex. We might fuck like rabbits for a few days but that’s not really the end of the world.”

He feels heat creep up his next as you nuzzle your nose against his, whispering softly.

“And doesn’t that sound nice? Cooped up in this little room, fucking each others brains out. Just you and me.”

He feels his dick steel against his will. He looks at you seriously, a fire in his expression.

“You’re being unfair.”

“Who, me? Never. I’m just telling you what I think.”

He groans in complaint. Is this the right thing to do? He doesn’t think so. But it’s not like he doesn’t want to. He really, really wants to have sex and there’s never been such a perfect opportunity. You’re a little too good at turning him on and he’s a little too pent up to think about it more clearly. It feels like the only thing he can think about, a side-effect of this whole conundrum. There is a right way to go about this and he can’t say for certain yours isn’t the one.

Plus the vivid picture you’ve painted of the two of you fucking in a room for hours is making his whole body burn up with lust. Fuck, the things he could do to you in all that time without it ever being enough.

Yuta didn’t know he was aching for you so badly until he was this close to having you.

“Baby,” He can feel how deep his voice is getting. It’s taking all of his strength to keep it in.

“How do you want me? Tell me. You’ve been thinking about me right?”

“Always,” He confesses, staring at you without any restraint “Always thinking of you.”

“Doing what?”

Oh. This is…

Oh.

“I’ve never seen you naked.”

“Then you daydream about seeing me naked? How tame.”

“It’s more than that, it’s—I want to make you feel good. You’re so good to me. And I wanna…”

You stare at him. You’re so cheeky.

“You wanna?”

“Want you to feel good. But because of me. All because of me.”

A wave of heat passes through him. He looks at you and you look...different. You look turned on, fingers carding through his hair. Right now all Yuta can think about is how much he wants. A word with so much weight behind it he can hardly keep up. God doesn’t Yuta want you more than he’s ever wanted anything.

The room feels like it’s hotter than it was a few seconds last. A thick tension spreads over everything like jam. Yuta is too dazed to do anything. He can only watch as you sit up. You guide him to lay on his back and climb on top of him with ease. Your thighs feel warm and soft as you straddled him, taking his hands to put them on your waist.

He slides them up underneath your shirt lightly, enough to feel the warmth of your skin on his calloused fingers. Your eyes lock as you lean forward the slightest bit, caging Yuta in with your hand next to his head.

“So possessive,” You tease, seeing right through him like you usually do. He really is. He thought he was a little better at hiding it “Already all yours, Yuta.”

That makes his dick twitch. You must feel it because you laugh at him about it and his hands grip even tighter. He’s gonna lose his mind, being swept up by you so easily. He’s gotten so used to forfeiting restraint. Always goes in head first because that’s how cowards have to learn to fight. But he’s forgotten how to hold back. How to suppress.

Right now, he feels like an animal. He feels like a restless hound dog, straining against the spiked collar he’s tried to keep himself in place. What does that make you, he wonders?

In an attempt at transparency, he looks at you and says “I want you so much.”

And your reply is about all the permission he needs.

“Then take me,”

Yuta heeds your words and takes. It’s easy to flip you both over from where you are. He mumbles an apology as you yelp in surprise - and he hopes you’ll forgive him for his impatience. He’s been picturing this for months now. He knows what he wants, and that’s you on your back with him on top of you - making you feel so fucking good you can’t stand it. He slots his legs between yours, hovering over you as your bodies press into each other.

You wrap your arms around Yutas neck with ease and he leans in to kiss you passionately. Despite where you are, it’s clear you're helping set the pace. Yuta is eager to follow. It starts off slow enough but when you pull away once, you're opening your mouth enough to let him in deeper. You stick your tongue out and Yuta follows suit. Everything is so hot he feels like it’ll burn, and you taste like mint toothpaste. He likes swapping spit with you like this, the messy way the drool runs down his chin and yours like you can’t get enough for each other.

He has no idea how long you stay like that. Just kissing is a dangerous game. The nip of your mouth and the press of your incisors in his lower lip leave him shuddering. His hard cock is pressed against your abdomen, and he can’t help himself but hump into the soft plush of your tummy. Even through the stiff material of his jeans he can feel you.

He quivers and whimpers into your mouth but you swallow the noise with delight. Your fingers find themself at the nape of his hand reaching up, tugging at the root. You pull away to give him a chance to breathe. He sounds pathetic, he knows it, but fuck he can’t hold it in anymore. Your voice is cool and collected yet rich and heady. It feels like a salve to his raw nerves, calming to him. He closes his eyes and humps into you and everything feels like it’ll disappear. Yuta just wants to give into his base needs. He wants to be all yours as much as he wants you to be all his and everything is so tangled up in his mind.

“That feel good, Yuta?”

“Y-yeah. Yes. Oh, yes.”

You giggle at him a little and Yuta looks up at you. Look at the swell of your lips and the flush and sheen on your skin. Too much, too much, too much.

But not enough at the same time, he rubs his cock against you again, harder.

“So pent up,” You comment smoothly and Yuta groans in agreement “Why don’t I help you a little?”

Unsure of what you mean, he stares at you hazily. You push him off, making him stand to his knees and he watches you as your hands come to the ends of your shirt. You pull it off over your head and toss it somewhere. You have nothing on underneath. His mouth dries out almost completely. Bare skin of your shoulders and the curve of your neck and your chest so open. Your nipples are hard against the cool air, standing to attention.

Your b0dy is so much sexier than he could’ve conjured up in his head. The real thing doesn’t even compare, and the way you move as you take off the rest is so fucking mesmerizing. Yuta watches you take off your pants next - you put your legs up to slide them off.

There’s not a single part of you that Yuta doesn’t want to claim for himself. He traces the outline of your legs, the bend of your knee and the arch of your foot. He should worship you, after all - he was right for trying to restrain it before. If he had this in the beginning, he’s afraid of what kind of person he might become. He’s scared of it even now.

Yuta is of course the type of man to get sick on his own devotion. He’s always been like that. That’s what the rings on his hands always mean. He wants to make himself sick on you.

Nothing could be more intense than just watching you undress, he doesn't think. You toss your shorts somewhere, but leave your panties on. Yuta still has his clothes on. The only barrier between you now is a thin layer of cotton. There’s a damp spot on it. He can’t stop his hand from reaching out, pressing into it with his thumb as gently as he can. You gasp. His eyes go wide.

“It’s okay,” You assure, a smile on your face “Just wasn’t expecting it.”

He hums, dumbstruck, and smooths his thumb over the seam. There’s something salacious about the boundary itself. The material that’s keeping him from just taking you.

“C-can you leave them on..? For a bit?” He asks. You blink twice. Even if you’re confused, there’s not any judgment. Yuta really does love you.

“Uh-huh. If you want me too,”

You give him the floor this time, Yuta thinks. He takes his shirt off too. He doesn’t take his jeans off completely, though. Only unzips them, pushing them down past his boxers to give him some breathing room. And with that he’s back on top of you. He presses a gentle kiss to your lips but moves down towards your jaw. The little fluttery sigh that leaves you makes everything close in around him. Like it’s only you two in the entire world. He leaves them down your neck, down your collarbone and sternum. Warm open mouth kisses trying all over every inch of you.

His hands shake as he reaches out for your chest. You chuckle and reach for him. Guide them to squeeze your tits firm, a cheeky look in your eye. He tries to take more confidence in it now. Gropes the fat between his fingers, palms over your nipples in appreciation. He’s entranced by it, pushing them together and teasing the hardened buds with the pads of his fingers.

“So pretty,” He mumbles, mostly to himself “You’re so pretty,”

“You’re pretty too, Yuta.”

He can feel a blush crawl up his skin. He ducks his head down to take your nipples into his mouth. You let out a soft moan of pleasure that encourages him to suck harder on one and use his fingers to tease you where his mouth can’t reach. Your sighs are shaky and you're gently losing your composure.

He wants to shatter you completely.

He grabs your thighs and encourages you to wrap your legs around his waist. And you do with his guidance, a well of desire about to burst within him. He adjusts until his cock is snug against your clothed cunt. A broken oh, leaves your lips and Yuta humps into you, shifting until he hits the sweet spot. Your voice sounds again, pitchy and melodic like a wind chime and that’s when Yuta knows he has it.

He has you right where he wants you now. Bodies pressed into each other and so involved, so together. Yuta can feel you everywhere. He’s always been in sync with you but every notch is turned to ten. The shallow rise and fall of your stomach, the slightest tenseness in your spine that melt away when he gives you a little attention. He has you in his grasp but he wants to hold onto you tighter. He feels like he’s been struck by lightning, the way his nerves are revved up.

He focuses on where your lower bodies meet, tongue poked between his lips and furrow in his brow. Drives his clothed, hard cock against your cunt, catching the crown into your clit until you’re shaking underneath him. There’s something so primal about it that Yuta can’t take it. He can’t think clearly anymore, lost in the feeling of dull pleasure. If it feels so good like this, being inside you might be too much. You’re both naked mostly except for where you both need each other. So close in proximity that Yuta can hear each of your short pants. Erratic and almost thoughtlessly driven by one single thing, pleasing you. Feeling each other, all wrapped up together. There’s something romantic about the mutual desperation.

Drawing out those moans as he sucks at your tits, making you feel how hard he is. How pent up and needy and fucking horny he is all for you.

Just humping your soft, sweet little cunt through your panties makes Yuta want to risk everything he’s got. The push and pull of too much and not enough at the same time. It’s so fucking euphoric. Your fabric keeps wetter and wetter, and Yuta doesn’t know if it’s you or him - his pre-cum dribbling through his boxers. Mixing together so that there’s less friction than there should be, material all soaked through and tacky.

He can feel your pussy pulse and tremble. Your spine goes stiff and Yuta pulls away to look at you. You’re beautiful. You’re on edge, in complete bliss and so fucking beautiful.

“Oh, oh, Yuta - shit, like that. G-gonna, gonna,”

He doesn’t know what overtakes him, but he babbles on pulling away.

“Cum for me, please—fuck, baby, p-please, need it,”

You cum the first time just like that. For Yuta, humping each other like two lovesick teenagers. All for him you get all broken. He can’t help but burn the image of you underneath in his head forever. He needs to see it all again.

“Oh, that felt so fucking good,” The praise feels like it’s being injected into his bloodstream“You make me feel sho good,”

The slight slur in your words and praise all together makes him too happy. He kisses you, sloppy and lovedrunk, tongues touching and teeth chattering.

“You’re everything I’ve ever wanted,” Yuta says with as much conviction as any one man could have. You laugh so loud it makes him smile. “I don’t wish well for anyone you dated before me.” And you laugh again even louder.

“You sound polite even when you’re threatening people.” You say with nothing but affection. Yuta wants more. He wants you. Even with this quiet lull, he’s thinking about how he can get you to cum again.

He nudges his nose to your cheek, kissing the corner of your mouth before he talks.

“I want you to do it again,” He states, slow and steady, trying to feel out your willingness “And then I want to fuck you,”

“Wanna fuck me after you make me a mess?” You say, much more bluntly than he has. You’re not wrong “Are you a sadist after all, Yuta?”

“You look good when you’re messy. ‘s not my fault.” He replies, a little bite to his words. This delights you to the point he's proud. He does his best not to look uncool and this one time he’s succeeded.

“Make a mess of me, Yuta,” You encourage, probably because you know he needs it. And he does “I want it.”

“Yeah,” Comes his reply, as he pulls himself off of you “Me too,”

The pace slows down now. The room smells of sex and Yuta can still feel the blood rushing in his ears but nothing so frantic. He lays you back, your legs undoing from behind him and resting. Yuta kisses your sternum first, a wave of emotion running through him. He puts his hands on your sides, sliding them down to meet your hips and squeezing tight.

He kisses his down your body like it’s nothing to be embarrassed about. He can feel you curl in above him - not completely. But you seem a little astonished, and he'd be lying if he said it didn’t make him feel like he accomplished something. He works his way lower slowly, rubbing small circles into your skin as often as he can. Caressing you and committing your body to memory. He wants you to feel him as much as he’s feeling you, to feel his touch. The tension in the air is strengthened by his silence.

If he were saying anything it’d be something like this. Like can you feel it? how much i love you? or i want all of you. Things he can’t often muster up the strength to say. He’s good with his words but not good enough to communicate all of it so bluntly. Yuta is brave in areas other than love. Sometimes your adoration makes all the words clog in his throat. This is better for him, the physicality brings him peace of mind.

He likes how you feel. Your skin is much softer when he compares it to his, feels so different and more plush and comfortable. Yuta likes taking you in his hands and kneading the skin gently enough to relax you. Lower and lower, a trail of wet marks until he’s close to your clothed cunt. He stares at the sticky material, kissing it feather light before redirecting his attention to your thighs.

He starts again, at the bend of your knee - and works his way inward. He’s rougher now, taking time to mark up your inner thigh with precision. Yuta can’t help himself, placing kisses in the last places his teeth bit you. He does it again and again, up along one thigh and then moving to the other until you’re covered in them.

You’re trembling with anticipation. A sense of contentment washes over Yuta as his breath fans over your cunt, so completely soaked the fabrics a different color. His tongue runs over the material, a shameless moan of pleasure leaving his mouth. You arch your back, hands reaching to take root in his hair. The sensation of tension on his scalp makes his cock twitch. It’s salty and a little bitter, the mix of his pre-cum and yours altogether. Yuta goes to do it again anyway. The mess of it gets him excited, unconsciously rubbing into the sheets underneath him.

“O-oh, Yuta.”

He shivers, hands planing over the tops of your thighs as he brings him down close to him.

“Yeah, yeah baby. Just me and you,”

A soft laugh leaves your mouth. Yuta can feel how worked up you are. You’re quiet and tense. Some part of him wants to leave you like that waiting, but the other part of him wants to give you everything you’ve ever asked for. He gives into the latter, because that’s what he wants more. Rolls the fabric off of your legs with a deep sigh, a pleased hum. He loves the way you smell, the scent of sex and arousal mixed with the fancy soaps you keep in your bathroom. Your pussy is as pretty as you are, a sheen of arousal all along your slit. Your clit peeks through, swelled from need. Yuta kisses it without thinking.

He starts slow. Lays his tongue flat against the seam of your cunt before dragging it up. The taste of you covers his mouth, tangy and slightly sweet - Yuta can’t get enough of you. He moans in appreciation, repeating the gesture as he pulls your pussy close. His nose bumps into your sex. He peers up at you with his lashes. You’re so pretty it makes him want to please. He repeats this over and over - licking at your clit with enthusiasm. Your clit is hard and needy, throbbing against the soft, smooth muscle of his tongue as he gains a sort of rhythm. He gauges your reaction when he tries something new, adding pressure until you’re squirming underneath him. When you start growing noisier, Yuta knows he’s hit the right pace.

And he stays like that, your pussy soaking his mouth and chin. He adjusts himself slightly, rubbing his fingers between your folds. You let out a soft oh above him, making him want to laugh. He keeps at it, his fingers sliding far enough to tease your entrance. Your hole is twitching without him having done much at all, his middle finger teasing and prodding.

“Don’t t-tease so much,” You pant.

Yuta nearly blows his load listening to you talk like that. He didn’t think you could be so cute. He listens though, pushing his middle finger into you with ease. It doesn’t take too much effort. Your insides are so incredibly wet for him. Your walls are so soft and inviting, syrupy to the touch. Yuta loves feeling them. He gives you time to adjust to the new sensation, fucking in and out slow enough that the tension melts. He gets knuckle deep with his middle finger and when it doesn’t seem like you’re tense anymore - he goes and adds another.

He does both in tandem - and there’s a period where it’s all a bunch of sensation for you. Eventually it stops being just a feeling, turns into pleasure. He curls his fingers up against you hard, rubbing the soft and spongy area and he can feel you practically lurch forward. Your spine arches, mouth dropped open in a soft ‘o’. Another feeling of pride spreads through his chest, his whole body. He wants you to let go again just like this. While he fingers your weepy cunt and with your clit in his mouth - he wants to see how far he can push. How wet you can get before he ever gets inside.

Yuta isn’t one for competition or ego. He’s always been easy-going. But something about you being underneath him like this, moaning for him like this - makes him feel like he should put in a little more effort to prove himself. He wants to make you feel so good, wants to see your composure break down steadily. He wants you praise him for it, to fuck each other like animals in the thereafter of your second orgasm. He pushes towards that goal steadfastly, and soon enough your body catches up with him.

Yuta can practically feel your stomach tighten. You let out a noise, a string of mismatched syllables like a warning. Yuta only hums in encouragement, keeping his pace exactly the same. Feeling it is incredible. His fingers can feel the way your walls tighten up so hard and the tremors of the aftermath.

Your back curves in a C as you cum, hard for him and he can feel it. He can feel you cum. He can see you, see the pleasure crash into you like a tidal wave. A second. Yuta made you cum twice in a row and he’s already itching to do it a third.

You practically pry him off as you ride the wave of your high. You sigh deeply, and Yuta licks his fingers. He waits for your adoration, pleased to receive as you pull him up for a kiss.

“You’re so fucking good, Yuta,” You say and Yuta feels his resolve crumble. He needs to fuck you immediately “So, so good to me baby.”

He whimpers into your mouth. “I need you.”

You laugh breathlessly, your hand reaching between your bodies to squeeze his cock. Yuta shudders and you giggle to yourself.

“Yeah. Bet you’re feeling pent up, Yuta. How about I treat you this time? That okay?”

“Treat me?”

“By riding you,” You say, smiling at him. He gets chills from the offer “You want that?”

“Oh. Oh, fuck - please. Please?”

You smile at him.

“Lay on your back, sweet boy.”

Sweet boy. He swallows thickly but does as you say. Lays back and watches you climb over him a second time tonight - this time with a much more obvious intent. He can’t stop thinking about how gorgeous he finds you - no matter how many times he sees you, it’s not easy to get used to.

You sit up on his lap, naked and beautiful, your hangs tugging down his boxers just enough to free his cock. He hisses at the sensation of air, then moans because your hand squeezed around the shaft. Yuta watches, bewitched, by how you spit into the palm of your hands and let it drip down onto his cock. You stroke until he’s covered in it, saliva making a mess of him. When he’s all wet, you scoot forward just slightly. A hand ends up on his chest as you pull your hips up.

Guiding the tip to your hole, you sink down on Yuta finally. He can only recognize loosely that there’s no condoms to be seen but he doesn’t find it in himself to care. There’s a slight sensation of tension that quickly gives away to nothing but slick, white-hot pleasure. You feel amazing. It’s not like anything he’s ever felt in his entire life and each time you drop down another inch - he’s biting his cheek trying not to cum immediately. That’d be such a waste, even if you’ve promised to fuck like rabbits - Yuta wants to make this last long.

You lower yourself steadily until all of him is inside. Your expression is slightly pinched, and your whole body trembles before you finally seem comfortable. You lean forward, your hand next to Yuta’s head as you look at him.

“Cum when you feel like you need to, ‘kay?”

Yuta just swallows.

Before he gets a chance to adjust to the feeling, you pick your hips and slam them back down on his cock without breaking a sweat. Yuta nearly screams, his hands immediately shooting to your hips to try and slow you down. You give him a wry grin, He almost wants to plead for your mercy.

“Want me to go slower?”

“Please be nice.”

You giggle but heed his request. Repeating the motion but slower as promised, you rock yourself steadily onto Yuta’s cock. The pace is controlled and smooth, a rhythmic pass of your hips over and over. Your insides feel like they’ll melt him completely, make him liquid from the inside out. You’re picturesque riding him, tits bouncing and leaned forward enough that Yuta can see the concentration on your face. He watches you find your own pleasure in it too - somewhere half-way between grinding and bouncing that makes you look so good. He feels so incredible like this.

He moves his hands so they’re grabbing your ass and only moves with you slightly. Not enough to change the pace, but to meet you. The room is filled with the sound of skin hitting skin - a tacky smack as your bounces hard enough to hit Yutas thighs. Something about is so vulgar, but something about is so sensual. He can feel every nerve in his body standing on edge. Your hand moves gently between your bodies to tease your clit as you ride and Yuta can’t help but be impressed by your stamina. He feels so spoiled. Feels so mind-numbingly good he wants to go brain dead while you drain for everything he’s got.

Your expression is blissed out as you hit your stride, absolutely debauched. He can feel you again, another rush of arousal. He’s getting better at telling when you’re close. Your pussy is so sloppy all for him, because of him. So messy that it’s dripping down his cock onto his balls, all over the sheets underneath you. He can feel you clench in anticipation - the sudden spasming in the build up.

“Gonna cum again and I want you cum right after me, yeah baby? Can you do that?”

Yuta groans.

“Pleasepleaseplease.” Is all he can make out. You laugh, breathy. Your pace is still the same as you rub your clit. The third time you cum is less intense. It’s a shorter wave, a softer sort of orgasm that seems to ease you more than it does anything else. Even still, you clench around his cock hard - getting so much wetter than you were a minute ago.

It’s in the tremors that Yuta finally feels in touch with himself again. He loses himself completely. Finally giving into the sensation that’s been drowning him, He feels it in his entire lower body. Every atom of him finally catching up to the high of the release. It’s so intense when he opens his mouth nothing comes out. His eyes shoot open then go back closed. The coil in his stomach loosens more slowly at first than all at once, like a car crash. When Yuta finally cums he sees nothing but white stars in his vision. He can’t scream, can’t speak - so he holds onto you tight and finishes to the sound of your gentle coaxing. Your voice is shot hoarse as you coo to him.

“That’s it baby, cum for me. That’s it, there you go.” Echoes around in his head. Cum spurts out of him, thick and hot in your walls and he doesn’t even try to pull out as he goes completely limp underneath you.

When he opens his eyes back up again, you're both just as ragged as each other. Yuta can’t stop himself from laughing. He hugs you tight to his chest as you lay on top of him - naked bodies and tangled limbs.

“I love you,” Yuta says blearily. You laugh.

“I love you too, Yuta.”

After you and Yuta manage the energy to shower, you find yourselves back in bed. It’s late when you’re finally ready to sleep, being in the same positions you were before. Only this time with new sheets.

Yuta lets you into his arms, wrapping them around you as you nuzzle into his chest.

“So. Was it worth breaking your rules?”

Yuta can’t help but break out into laughter at your question. He nods his head, a flush on his expression.

“Yeah. Yeah it was.”

#yuta x reader #yuta okkotsu x reader #jjk x reader #jjk smut #yuta okkotsu smut #writing tag #i was NOT going to post this until i woke up later #but due to unforseen and horrendous circumstances i am alive #i wrote this for miss aleks i am literally so grateful for u kdsjknkjsd thank u sm #i hope it is okay!! its been a while since ive written him

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i-need-some-advice-on · 4 months

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I have a sweet friend whom I love very much. But as the years go by I'm becoming less and less sure that our morals and politics align. I'm scared of losing them but I'm also worried about the resentment that I'm slowly developing for them. Does anyone know how to deal with this kind of thing?

For context, my friend is studying to become a psychologist. In the past, I used to have the same opinions about therapy that most people in the majority demographic do - that "Therapy is good and psychiatry is a good and altruistic field, and if a bad therapist hurts someone then it's just that individual practitioner being a bad apple."

But I have a PD diagnosis, I've had previous (bad, as you can imagine) experiences with therapy. And I mean EXTREMELY bad, it threatened my safety in an abusive household and I was also in risk of forced institutionalisation once (That one was related to depression a lot more than any PD just to be clear.)

And as I educate myself more and talk to other people who were in similar situations, i get more and more anti-psych with time. It's not really a Few Bad Apples situation if the therapist(s) who hurt us were technically doing their exact job description and were actually adhering to their regulations. I have developed a huge mistrust for psychologists and therapists and like 50% of it is a knee-jerk personal trauma reaction and the other 50% is genuinely getting more socially conscious and knowing that I'd be treated even worse in a whiter country (which my friend is.)

They also tell me things about their actual psychology classes and every fact I learn unsettles me more. Their classes, teachers and entry level career paths are ALARMINGLY blasé, unprofessional and unethical than what you'd expect from such a serious profession.

My friend is a good person btw I am fully sure they're trying so hard to stay ethical and genuine even when their classes/grades literally inventivize them not to be. I know they're that one person in class who goes all in to make an original presentation while everyone who copied off the internet gets an A. But I just feel sad about how far this can really go, it's like seeing someone genuinely try to be a good cop.

I have known this person for a few years and I see them as a LIFELONG friend, I want to hang out with them when we're old and boring. But I just don't know if I will ever be okay with their education and future career, sometimes I'm actively scared of what their psychiatry books must have told them about people like me. Again, my friend has repeatedly reassured me that they're one of the good ones that don't hate or discrimate against certain disorders but I still believe it's a systematic issue. I'm scared of watching them turn into something else but at the same time I don't want to lose them. I also don't think I have any right to tell them what to do with their own life.

All my opinions about psychology here were purely to give you an exact idea of what I'm talking about! I don't want to start any discourse about the anti psych movement on this blog because that's not its purpose (thanks for this space btw op <3) I just didn't want people to assume that my friend was a right winger or something, and that's the only thing it sounds like if I leave it in vague terms. What do I do? Has anyone ever been in this kind of situations with a friend's beliefs and what did you do about it?

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ewingstan · 5 months

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Okay, for the philosophical ask game: Jack Slash. I'm curious as to what this one could possibly be lol

SEND ME A WILDBOW CHARACTER YOU LOVE. I WILL TELL YOU WHICH PHILOSOPHICAL THOUGHT EXPERIMENT YOU SHOULD GET REALLY OPINIONATED ABOUT (SLASH DEVELOP A PSYCHOSEXUAL FIXATION ON)

This is less a specific thought experiment, but a lot of ethics and metaethics will have "person who is very inclined to harm others, very good at harming others, and cannot be convinced to stop harming others*" as almost a stock character of sorts to pose a variety of questions. They're often invoked as an edge-case to test various common moral claims, especially claims about what ground morality. For instance, most ethical systems are based on commonly shared moral intuitions. If we all have the same basic beliefs about what's good and whats bad, the claim goes, we can use that as a foundation to decide the more complicated stuff. But we can invoke the stock badman to question this—if someone doesn't have the same basic moral intuitions, should it throw our confidence in trusting such intuitions into question? Or the claim that rights are based on a sort of reciprocal obligation members of the moral community have towards each other—would such a person be part of the moral community? If not, do they lack rights?

Probably the most famous example is Plato's Ring of Gyges, where a man presents the case against justice by arguing that if someone could get away with being unjust—if they had a ring that allowed them to be invisible and commit crimes without being seen—they would obviously do it and be better off for it. The whole of the Republic is a response to this position, arguing why it would be in someone's best interest to act justly even when unobserved.

*Notably, this often gets conflated with psychopaths, especially in philosophy of mind and neuroethics. Which I'm not the biggest fan of. I think you can have a lot of interesting philosophical explorations of "psychopathy" as a label, and even a lot of exploration about how specific symptoms and causes interact with various ethical theories, such as models of moral responsibility. But a lot of papers that invoke people with psychopathy treat psychopathy as an ontological category instead of a way to say that someone checks some number of boxes on a large checklist of related behavioral symptoms. And then they misrepresent what people with psychopathy are like, because they often use them to mean "people who don't have moral intuitions" which is a huge oversimplification. There are specific symptoms associated with psychopathy or ASPD you could explore the ethical implications of, such as a worse emotional theory of mind than "normal", or greater impulsivity, or a lowered tendency to change behavior after encountering negative stimuli. And you could talk about those in isolation or even all of them in tandem, or you could just talk about a theoretical person who lacks moral intuitions. But nooooo lets just pretend a group of people fit the abstracted view of moral intuitions as a general category that I need for my argument. Its lazy is what it is.

And that's not even getting into the philosophers who use psychopath to mean "ontologically evil person who will always behave horribly." All the ethicists who do this shit need to A) learn how psychologists actually talk about psychopaths and more importantly B) do their goddamn job and analyze the assumptions said psychologists are making/what principles are behind their taxonomies/what different assumptions and principles might lead to. Criminal psychologists aren't carving nature at the joints, stop treating this like a metaphysical category and certainly stop treating it like an ethical category. This is what happens when ethics keeps the concept of "moral character" as a concept that gets taken seriously.

#thought experiment ask game #sorry for the rant #jack slash #leo says

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religion-is-a-mental-illness · 5 months

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By: Robert F. Allen

Published: Dec 19, 2023

I was an embittered, well-lapsed Catholic when I married my standardly rebellious Catholic wife. My wife despises the Church’s moral bullying, misogyny, and corruption, but she believes in God and admires the charitable side of the clergy, which is considerable, I admit. I decided to throw belief away entirely four or five years into our marriage. I felt that we were both ambivalent, and incongruencies would cancel each other out, which they did—until we had children. We live in a prosperous Philadelphia suburb, where Catholicism is largely about identity, image, and loyalty to both. These Catholics do not truly take instructions from the Church regarding how to live their lives, except to highlight the inadequacies of others with a self-righteous tsk-tsk. They go to Mass to be seen, if they show up at all, and tithes-by-mail stay the wagging finger at the pulpit. Homilies are absorbed with indulgent smiles; in smaller circles, parishioners—third cocktail in hand—brag of dismissing the impractical messages, too educated and independent to believe Medieval directives on guilt, love, and reproduction from an isolated figurehead.

I first noted the difference in socio-economically diluted Catholicism at our pre-Cana class when the group of wedded, volunteer instructors skipped the subject of sexual intercourse entirely. Friends in rural-ish suburbs (where I was raised) told us of their multi-day sex talks with careful instructions on using the rhythm method to achieve pregnancy, not prevent it. Other friends living between these extremes told us a member of their class asked if wedded couples were allowed to have oral sex. They were begrudgingly told yes, so long as it was followed by penetration with intent to conceive a baby. Church officials sat in a room and reasoned to that distinction to make Catholicism sweeter and easier to swallow, so to speak. There was no end across the spectrum of the talk of children, the highest purpose of marriage. Our group was simply told that children are gifts from God, and then the subject was changed rapidly lest the entirely college-educated, career-minded betrothed think on it for too long and broach any questions. Beyond the pale, the justification for a brood of children was to rebuild the Catholic ranks against the “threat” of being overthrown by Blacks, Jews, Hindus, and especially Muslims.

Amid the public uncloaking of institutionalized Catholic sexual abuse, my son was born, and my daughter arrived two years later. That was the turning-away point for me, but my wife, although outraged, could not sever her ties to the Church—out of some personal desire but mostly for fear of how it would hurt her parents. I continued to fake it rather than cause anyone else discomfort. I also had a mentor who was of Jewish heritage but raised without religion by his parents. Despite being an atheist, he wished his parents had given him some sort of formal religious training—perhaps he realized to truly reject a proposition you must thoroughly understand it. I took this to heart and resigned myself to letting my children be raised Catholic. The soft Catholicism in our territory let me bend further and allow my son to attend a Catholic preschool.

I encouraged science and ethics as I would have even without the presence of religion in their lives, but never in opposition to religion. Whenever my relentlessly inquisitive children would mention contradictions in common ancestry and Adam and Eve or why ghosts don’t exist in their closets but there is a Holy Spirit in the church, I would say, “Well, that’s how the story goes.” I lived like a fool for several years, believing that if I showed courtesy to the Church the favor would be returned in kind to science and reason. With my son’s first Confession, I could not sleep at the thought of my son learning that he was somehow already “bad.” Other weak attempts at corrupting my son clogged my mind, and then came the Education Fair, featuring trifold displays created by the students. I was drawn to the section with displays bearing such phrases as “End Euthanasia NOW!” and “Abortion Kills Lives!” I searched in vain for the science displays. I discovered later that the Big Bang is purposely omitted from school discourse—not challenged but not taught either—and this upper-middle-class Catholic school does not teach science consistently or well. Even religion classes were more directed to doctrine and politics than metaphysics and love or our shared physical reality and humanity. The love discussed was meant for other Catholics, not just anyone. I got my son out of there; my daughter never attended; and we moved them to public school.

Away from daily indoctrination, my children continued to attend weekly “Preparation” courses for the Sacraments and “received” them all. They did not grow up with the infamous socio-disciplinary side of Catholicism—they’ve never even seen a nun in the form we do in our nightmares—so they have no reason to be bitter-yet-accepting of it as older generations are. However, they are also not ambivalent toward Catholicism and religion.

I never told my children I’m an atheist; yet my children are themselves atheists. They saw on their own that religion makes no sense. Out of respect for the agreements I made and the family into which I was welcomed, I neither confirmed nor denied criticisms my children made of religion, because I never needed to. I raised them to think for themselves based on facts, and that is what they do. They don’t believe in Adam and Eve when we know for certain that it is a myth if merely placed beside what evidence they learn in biology class. There were no knock-down drag-out fights at the dinner table with atheistic diatribes. Our house has several Bibles as well as several volumes on biology and other sciences; we have only one microscope in our house, but it gets more use than all the Bibles. What actual Bible reading my children have done was suggested by me, not the Church. (As many Catholics know, the Church cares more about obedience to the Church than obedience to God and so emphasizes doctrine over the Bible.) I don’t doubt my behavior would be seen as more than irresponsible, or even evil, if my atheism were revealed to my larger family. I encouraged science with my children as I had from the first day of their lives, but never as an affront to the Church. The Church actively does the opposite. My children made up their own minds and became decent human beings nevertheless.

I admire Stephen Jay Gould but not “non-overlapping magisteria,” despite raising my children on it. Science and religion need only to sit beside one another without insult or especially pretension for science to prevail (I suspect this is what Gould truly meant). I said nothing to my children about Heaven or any other facet of belief except for Hell, which I said was made up completely by Dante; no one is ever punished for eternity in a mad, fiery theater, I told them. Religion only takes hold when enforced with ignorance, desperation, promises, and especially slander. In the absence of those weapons, my children saw that science stands or falls, even imperfectly, with the human desire for understanding, but religion requires a huge infrastructure of money, buildings, leaders, and propaganda to endure, particularly when immoral and criminal. They know the very roots and highest branches of the Church continue to grow even with poisoned sap.

For now, my children are decent human beings, if I do say so myself, and both have largely been indifferent toward religion their whole lives with no fear of Hell. My son cried at listening to HAL’s disintegration into childhood while being deactivated in the film 2001: A Space Odyssey; he said it wasn’t HAL’s fault, because bad people had manipulated him. My daughter broke into sobs on the streets of Paris in 2016 at seeing children begging, and I had to convince her that she is not “spoiled” and should enjoy her trip. One could say they both learned quite a bit from religion but through examples of exploitation and excess. With no fear of almighty punishment, my children should by now be hiding corpses in the woods, just as I was doomed to grow up mutilating people due to watching Tom and Jerry cartoons. While saying nothing to my children about prayer, good or bad, I frequently praise biology for how it leads to everything we know about how to heal and hurt ourselves (many Catholics still won’t even admit the Church’s pedophilia problem). My children are allergic to peanuts, and my son almost died on one occasion. They found it easier to digest the contradiction of their own bodies’ immune systems trying to kill them when explained scientifically, rather than with the will of a god who supposedly loves them yet put them at the mercy of a legume.

I have always stressed to them that they are human like everyone else they see, and I use the concept of empathy to explain why they should be “good,” but I am not fool enough to believe that I can let science or reason do the rest. Many Catholics seem to think that the accident of being Catholic purchases assured success under God’s eye; never mind that they have created exclusionary social/financial devices to accommodate God’s absence. My children know they can be good (or bad) with or without God, and it is always an informed choice that they must make for themselves throughout their lives.

#Robert F. Allen #irreligion #atheism #catholic church #catholicism #roman catholic #rise of the nones #decline of religion #no religion #religion #secular humanism #religion is a mental illness

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funkymbtifiction · 2 years

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hey it's me again! I finally discovered my psychological type, I am and the enfp! Anyway, yesterday I was thinking about "cognitive dissonance" and I was wondering when a type about "cognitive dissonance" (When our personality goes in the opposite direction) Can a personality return to normal after this cognitive dissonance? I've been wondering about this since yesterday! -kisses from Brazil ❤️

For those curious to know more, here's an interesting article about cognitive dissonance. In a nutshell, it's being aware of an inconsistency between your views (they cancel one another out) and often, rationalizing away one view/excusing it or assuming that information that goes against your preferred viewpoint is biased.

To overcome it, the person has to either change their viewpoint to reflect this new information (avoiding cognitive dissonance) or change their behavior to match their stated opinions. For example, let's choose something at random -- an animal lover loves animals and thinks it's kinder to them not to eat meat, but they eat meat anyway. They are experiencing cognitive dissonance. Their choice is either to re-examine their views and realize that they actually don't think it's wrong to eat meat (or they wouldn't be doing it), and that they can still love animals while being a meat eater... or to stop eating meat, so that their viewpoints align with their behaviors. The third option, which would be cognitive dissonance, would be to rationalize away these inconsistencies, make excuses for them (I just can't do it because XYZ), and remain wildly inconsistent in their stated beliefs and chosen behaviors.

People of extreme views often have inconsistencies in their thinking -- they support Y, but not Z, which is directly related to Y. Because they cannot see that the two things are connected (narrow thinking or wilful blindness/ignorance) and are oppositional. Another example would be someone who says stealing is wrong, but who gets all their music off the internet illegally. They might rationalize this way by arguing that by not stealing something tangible off a store shelf (a CD), it's not actually thievery. Clearly, they actually don't think stealing is wrong or they wouldn't be doing it or making excuses for it -- in this case, they may feel that the "right" thing to think is that stealing is wrong, or that people want to hear that from them, or even to prop up their own sense of pride, and it's inconsistent with their actual behaviors.

Can someone return to normal? Yes they can. But only if they deeply consider their true beliefs and values and bring their behaviors into alignment with their stated opinions. Such as -- you like a certain politician or movie star, but you also have firm views on something, and find out that they violate those standards. You have a choice to revisit your thinking and determine if this is a deal-breaker (intellectual honesty, and the admission that your liking for them outweighs your distaste for their behavior, or to go "off" them), or to ignore it or reframe it -- they didn't actually do that, someone made it up to slander them.

Another example would pertain to being a humanitarian and stating humanitarian viewpoints, but owning possessions or iPhones made by orphans in third world countries for pennies per day. A denier would ignore that fact or claim it's factually wrong/a lie to slander the company that mass-produces the possession they want, a justifier would insist they need the possession and that negates their views, and an avoider would not do the research to find out where their possessions are coming from and who is making them (avoiding awareness means blissful ignorance of how you are violating your own beliefs). Humans are trained to see themselves, in some sense, as "good" people, as the heroes of their own stories, and so go out of their way to face the discomfort that comes from seeing the inconsistencies between the things they consider to be "ethical/moral" and their own behavior.

Everyone has a certain amount of cognitive dissonance happening on a regular basis -- it's normal to be inconsistent. It only becomes a serious problem when it falls into denial, a lack of self-awareness or self-knowledge, or becomes openly hypocritical in some way that is damaging to yourself, what you stand for, or others. Sometimes it is more intellectually honest to admit you don't care about XYZ or not to loudly proclaim views that are inconsistent with your behavior.

To deal with this, you have to change the behavior or add something to your behavior. Otherwise, you wind up justifying or excusing your behavior or worse, denying information that conflicts with your existing beliefs. For example, someone who says they want to lose weight while being aware of their constant over-eating. Choice #1 includes eating less, and modifying behaviors would include adding in exercise to burn off those calories. Justification includes excuses ("I am allowed to eat more sometimes"), and denial would be insisting that you don't over-eat, and blaming other factors (they put too much sugar in things, or this doesn't have a lot of calories when in fact it does).

#question #cognitive dissonance

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nothinggold13 · 2 years

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Look, I’m just some random follower of yours and I’m not going to change your mind, but it really saddens me to see your “pro-life” reblog cross my dash. I totally agree that people who want to go through with pregnancies should be given all the financial support they need to do so, but that doesn’t mean it should be the only option. Everybody should have their own autonomy over their body: not agreeing with abortions for yourself is fine, but don’t pretend to be a feminist if you don’t want freedom for other women to decide what is right for them.

(Sorry to send such a preachy ask, I enjoy your blog but if I came across someone I interacted with irl speaking against people’s rights I would speak up so I guess I should apply that rule online as well)

Do you know what saddens me? The fact that our society has decided that destroying our children is an acceptable solution to any of the problems we face as women.

Yes, I am a feminist. You probably read that in my tumblr bio, right behind a few other words, the most important of which being "Christian." Now, I am not only pro-life because of my faith; I believe it is an ethical stance, just as much as it is a religious one. But what that does mean is that my feminism -- my belief that women and men were created with equal value and dignity -- is influenced by my Christian values. If this sort of feminism doesn't suit you, then that's on you, but do not tell me that I am only "pretending" to be a feminist just because I believe that life has value.

I am not speaking against anyone's rights. I simply do not believe that abortion (i.e. the active decision to end a child's life) should be within our rights. Doing so actively attacks the rights of the children it refuses to acknowledge. I am pro-life because I believe in protecting their rights: because I believe that our rights do not trump theirs: because bodily autonomy only goes so far as it doesn't harm another person.

Perhaps you can see how, in my eyes, you are the one speaking against people's rights. Perhaps you can see how it is your viewpoint that saddens me. But perhaps you can't.

I understand the pro-choice perspective. I have empathy for women who feel like it is their only choice, and compassion for the ones who have made it. That doesn't mean I believe it is a morally acceptable choice to make, nor does it mean I believe the law should defend it. I do believe that as a society -- whether through the government or by our own actions -- we should do all possible to ensure that no woman ever has to make that choice. Abortion as a solution to any problem should be unthinkable.

This is not an invitation for you (or anyone) to further argue the pro-choice perspective for me. Believe me, I have heard the arguments. They simply do not make any difference. I am pro-life because I am a feminist just as much as I am pro-life because I am a Christian: because I believe both lives have equal value. You don't have to change your mind, either.

But please understand that I am pro-life. This is a pro-life blog. And, occasionally, I will share posts that celebrate that worldview. You are welcome to unfollow if this is uncomfortable for you. If, however, you can enjoy the content I create without letting my moral values offend you, then you are just as welcome to stick around. It is up to you. I don't have any desire to continue this discussion, as I find this debate mentally and emotionally draining, but I did want to take a moment to reply to your ask. I am glad you care about speaking up for others, and, in a way, I am even glad you felt I was someone worth speaking up to! But please do not tell me who I can and cannot speak up for.

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destinyimage · 5 months

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Target Your Binding & Loosing: How to Effectively Intercede

How do we know what to bind and loose?

God reveals His will in His Word. By studying the Bible, we know what does not line up with His will, and then we develop a prayer strategy to “legislate” His will, or bring our world into alignment with His Word.

When a general goes to war, he prepares a plan. To develop this plan, he needs to know the topography of the land, where the battle will take place, the weapons the enemy has in their arsenal, and even the way the opposing general thinks. He does this through gathering intelligence.

It is no different when we go to fight a spiritual battle against all the strategies that satan has put in place against our nations. We must gather spiritual intelligence and then plan for how we will pray. My friend George Otis Jr., who created the excellent Transformation series, has coined the phrase for this type of plan development. He calls it spiritual mapping. Spiritual mapping, previously discussed, provides an X-ray of what is happening in the invisible realm so we know how to pray effectively.

We must study the strongholds or illegal places of our nations and put together an intercessory plan to legislate God’s will into every sector of society. For too long we have been ignorant of satan’s devices (see 2 Corinthians 2:11).

How do we develop a spiritual map or prayer strategy for a specific sector of society? To start with, the following are some good questions to research and find answers:

Who were the founders of your city?

What did they believe?

Were their beliefs biblically based?

How did their actions affect the society in which you live?

If the founders established your city on righteous truth, did this change over the years and who changed it?

How has this affected the thinking of your society?

What does your society believe and teach through sectors such as education, media, and other channels of communication?

What strongholds have developed as a result of this wrong thinking, laws, or actions?

I am going to illustrate three areas as examples for prayer that need serious legislating in the heavens. They were chosen because of their particular influence on nations and their cultures. Each is a mind-molder in some way and key to renewing the hearts and worldviews of our nations.

Education

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Let’s put education in the context of teaching nations. This is how I would do this for the American education system, starting with answering the eight questions presented:

The founders were godly believers who taught from righteous educational textbooks such as The New England Primer.

Their beliefs were that we should teach our children based on Scripture.

Their beliefs were biblically based.

As long as the original methods of education were in place, the nation and its children prospered.

5. Education took a turn away from God beginning in a visible way in 1933, with the Humanist Manifesto and the change in teaching philosophy presented through the “Father of Modern American Education,” John Dewey.

6. Every sector of society has been influenced through humanist doctrine.

7. Educators in general have been taught “situation ethics,” the nonethical approach that has led to a moral breakdown in our society.

8. Strongholds of humanism (remember, the humanist believes that the universe is self-existing and not created) have now permeated film, television, art, science, architecture, and all teaching of the liberal arts in colleges and universities.

How do we, on a practical level, begin to “demolish” the stronghold of humanism in our educational system?

Be informed. Know what is being taught to students on every level in the schools in your area.

Obtain a roster of teachers, look at the curriculum being taught, and find out what the teaching philosophy of the school system is.

Go to the library and see what reading material is provided for students.

Find an interested group of Christian students and encourage them to form a prayer group on campus. Get as close as you can yourself to the campus and pray. Intercede for God to bring others across your path to join you in prayer.

Like Daniel, repent for the sins of the school that your children attend or that your tax money funds (see Daniel 9:8-15).

Ask God if you should fast. I suggest doing so.

List the points in the Humanist Manifestos I, II, and III, and ask God to reverse these strategies that have been put in place in your schools. A few of these are:

The teaching of evolution

The belief that God is not a prayer-hearing God

The endorsement of sexual promiscuity

Last, but certainly not least, fast and pray for God to send a mighty revival among the students.

This is only a partial list. Be led of the Lord in your praying, and He will fill in the other specifics that pertain more directly to your area.

Architecture

While teaching in a church in Phoenix, Arizona, I shared about the Humanist Manifesto and the devastating spiritual results it has had in our school systems. During that time, I also had a revelation that the Lord would use the graduates of the various colleges, such as the school of music, architecture, etc., to return to their campuses to pray and intercede for God to bring revival to those schools. Then, through their legislating the will of God in these schools, God would free the minds of the students to be open to learn biblical truth, even to hunger and search for it.

There is a saying, “From the roots grow the shoots.” What is planted through a life affects the particular sphere that we influence. I believe that Frank Lloyd Wright’s unholy roots affected the school of architecture he founded, which closed in 2020.

In the Bible, Nimrod was a city builder who did so unrighteously. Israel needed to repent of his unrighteousness to get back into favor with God. We need to repent of past sins and pray that God will release righteousness into the teaching of architecture today.

The Entertainment Industry

There can be no doubt that this industry can be a major mind-molder for either good or evil. Media is, without a doubt, one of the most important influencers of culture around the world. Much prayer has saturated Hollywood from groups such as the Hollywood Transformation Group. I have personally been involved in prayer gatherings at major Hollywood studios. For years, there has been a systematic plan by the homosexual community to infiltrate Hollywood.

It is sobering to say that there are nations today where pastors can be jailed if they openly speak out against homosexuality from the pulpit. However, we must be willing to do just that, even if it means going to jail.

We need to intercede for Hollywood and the homosexual community because homosexuality has become intertwined with the arts on every level. The Lord wants to touch those who are stars in the eyes of the world so they will have a righteous influence. Intercession must be made on behalf of those in media and communication because what goes across the airways touches millions of people the world over. It affects what cultures and societies think, wear, act, and feel.

At one time the church had godly sway over the movie-making industry. There was even a production code that was strengthened and fortified by the Catholic Legion of Decency, which designated “indecent” films Catholics should boycott. The church has lost its voice.

There cannot be a more critical area for intercessors to focus on in prayer than Hollywood and the media. We also need to intercede for the Christians who are working diligently to change this area of influence.

Many nations of the world have their own film industries, and there is a great need to spiritually map their roots and develop prayer strategies to take dominion in the heavenlies over these molders of society. We all want to see the will of God done on earth as it is in Heaven, and targeting these areas is one way to see it happen.

As stated previously, targeted intercession will unleash revival, awakening, and reformation. And I believe God is raising up a powerful army of intercessors of all ages who will give their lives to pray for God to change the places where they live into holy habitations of peace, righteousness, and joy. Will you be one of them?

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mrkilroi · 2 years

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Adam's Birthday

By Yanki Tauber

Were Adam and Eve Jewish?

The reason I ask is that the Jewish calendar seems to be exclusively about Jewish history and the Jewish experience: Passover celebrates our liberation from Egypt, Shavout our receiving the Torah at Sinai, Yom Kippur is when G‑d forgave us for the sin of the Golden Calf and Sukkot recalls the divine protection during our wanderings through the desert. The list goes on: Simchat Torah, Chanukah, Purim, Lag BaOmer, Tishah B'Av—virtually all our holy days, festivals and special dates are distinctly Jewish affairs, concerned with our lives as Jews.

One very significant exception: the festival of Rosh Hashanah, which marks the birthday of the first two human beings, Adam and Eve, who walked the earth some 2,000 years before the first Jew was born and nearly 2,500 years before we were proclaimed a people at Mount Sinai.

Rosh Hashanah is clearly more than a token "Goyim Appreciation Day." But how?

And Rosh Hashanah is clearly more than a token "Goyim Appreciation Day." As its name proclaims, it's the head of the Jewish year. And as the Chassidic masters point out, the head of a thing is its primary and most encompassing component.

We Jews have a reputation for being an insular lot. We stand before G‑d as Jews, relate to each other as Jews, study, pray, and do acts of kindness as Jews, are born, marry, die and are buried as Jews. And we keep our Jewishness to ourselves: unlike most other religions and isms, we have no interest in converting non-Jews to Judaism. If people show interest, we try to talk them out of it.

So why is the very "head" of our year the one festival which relates to humanity as a whole?

Yet Judaism does have a universal message—one that is fundamental, indeed primal, to our identity as Jews. In the words of our sages, "Civility (derech eretz) comes before Torah."

Long before the Children of Israel received the Torah with its 613 mitzvot, Adam and Eve were given the fundamental laws of civilization. Later, these were reiterated to Noah and his sons and became known as the "Seven Noahide Laws." And when we stood at Sinai to receive "our" mitzvot, we were also given the job of "prevailing upon all inhabitants of the world to accept the laws commanded to the Children of Noah" (Maimonides' Mishnah Torah, Laws of Kings 7:10).

The Noahide Code is Judaism's universal message, yet it is not a "religion." The Noahide Code is not a "religion." This isn't a scaled-down Judaism for non-Jews. Rather, it's G‑d's blueprint for civilization, a seven-point foundation for the building of a just, moral and ethical society on earth. The Seven Laws include basics such as: Do not murder your fellow man. Do not steal. Be faithful to your spouse. Do not tear a limb off a living animal. Establish the legal and social institutions that will ensure a just and compassionate society.

Where it gets interesting is with the first two laws: belief in G‑d and the prohibition against blaspheme. I have a confession to make: some of my best friends are atheists. I can already hear them saying: "In my book, when you bring G‑d into the picture, that's religion, not morality or ethics. You can be a moral person also if you don't believe in and respect G‑d." But the entire point of the Noahide Code is that there's no morality without G‑d. Humanism won't cut it.

How you think of G‑d, how you communicate with G‑d, how you serve G‑d—that's between you and G‑d. That's religion. That's not what we're talking about. We're talking about the basic premise that the world has a Boss. That we are answerable to a higher authority than ourselves. That the One who created human life also set down the rules for humane living, and enforces those rules.

This—the Noachide Code insists—is the only viable basis for a civilized world.

A few short weeks ago, the awful realization hit us squarely in the face with the force of a Category Five storm: How pitifully thin the veneer of civilization is, how quickly it crumbles when its artificial supports are swept away!

This is what it takes, in this great country of ours, to stave off the law of the jungle: policemen to watch what we're doing, and policemen's police to make sure the policemen show up for work in the morning. Oh, and a few more important things: electric lights so that the policemen can see us, and passable roads so that they can cart us off to jail.

Turn off the lights, flood the roads and disable the punch clocks in the police stations, and five thousand years of civilization evaporate in an hour. The strong prey on the weak, pillaging and raping simply because they can.

I have another confession: some of my best friends are cultural snobs. I hear them saying: "You say that civilization broke down? You call those people civilized? Do they attend the opera on Wednesday nights? Have they read Voltaire? Do they gather in each other's homes in the evenings to discuss the great moral philosophers of the Rationalist and Humanist schools? These are people who have lived in poverty and depravity all their lives. Nothing really changed. It's just that before the hurricane, the crime and squalor in their ghettos followed certain known patterns and were nicely contained by police reports and government statistics. What shocked you was just more of the same, without the usual frames of reference. That's all..."

Turn off the lights, flood the roads and disable the punch clocks in the police stations, and five thousand years of civilization evaporate in an hour. Ok. So let's look back not three weeks but a hundred years. Question: What country had more moral philosophers per square kilometer than any other before or since? Answer: A large Western European country, begins with the letter G. Question: What country orchestrated, but a generation later, a highly efficient operation, aided by sophisticated technologies and accompanied by strains of Wagner, which was also the most horrendous acts of torture and murder in human history? Answer: Same place.

It's really quite logical. As the ancients said, you can't raise yourself by grabbing a fistful of your own hair and pulling upwards. Nothing human-based will ever transcend the human. A philosophy conceived by the human mind will be elegantly refuted—or side-stepped—by that same mind at the service of its own instincts.

Morality and ethics—the notion that "I want to do this but I won't because it's wrong" and "I don't feel like it, but I'll do it because it's the right thing to do"--might be temporarily enforced by a philosopher's thesis or a policeman's gun. But not for long.

On Rosh Hashanah we remember, and remind the world, that G‑d created man and woman, G‑d gave them the gift of life, and G‑d laid down its rules: respect the life, family and property of your fellow, treat the creatures of your planet kindly, do charity and uphold justice. Do so not only because it makes sense to you, not only because it "feels right," but because you are a subject of G‑d and you accept your Sovereign's decrees.

This is the fountainhead of our existence. Without this, there is nothing.

By Yanki Tauber

#freedom #g*d #noahide #religon #b'nei noach #theunrelogon

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gothprentiss · 2 years

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i know this (the whole post i’ve screenshotted) is like probably, as discourse goes, quite helpful and compelling, if we assume that anyone still participating in the Queer vs Q Slur Discourse is doing so in good faith rather than to merely spell out their immovable beliefs in increasingly condescending terms but every time i see this i do think— are you sure this is what’s at stake?

like yes, sure, on one hand queerness is a great way to explore how difference is constructed against a nonexistent but enforced ideal. every oversimplified intro to theory book will tell you this— we’re all a little bit queer, proclaims some self professed Theory Expert who then will go on to say shit which wouldn’t pass even the most glancing homophobia smell test in the vacuum of space. and it’s true that some dude who only learned about bisexuality last year can also confidently describe himself as queer and claim that you are, too, because plenty of straight men very fruitily think strong women are hot. i promise i’m not making this up. any disability studies intro of any theoretical complexity should make the same central point: the normative body is not one which is actually common to all abled people, and the categories of the different and the other are constructed and enforced. i agree with this principle and am not trying to be dismissive but i do also want to point out that a lot of the time this is not being treated as an ethos or a political impetus but rather as an analytic. now you might say the three overlap— sure— but largely what’s going on here forms a larger scale deconstructionist project, which strikes me as being its own underlying ethic.

but my actual beeves are two.

first, i’m wary of the practice of— even just as an offhand comment— aligning queer as a broad term of identity— and now, irrevocably, of demographic— with queer theory. there are the obvious problems (which in this context are, i think, kind of beside the point but still relevant) of accessibility and anti-intellectualism. there is also the problem of what queer theory largely does. this is of course malleable and debatable but it is genuinely a project of deconstruction, which does not seek, ultimately, to assert difference as a unifying factor, except to the extent that it unifies all as different. this creates quite a notable difficulty as a way of stating or claiming an identity, because the binary of “normal” and “different” being invoked here is what this strand of theory is a useful tool for undermining. treating queer theory as synonymous with queer as a term of identity is like the new electric hummer (i’m being flippant). obviously there is also the fact of like— queerness means different things for different people. queer theory has different aims and philosophies. in all settings you run into the problem of a universal which also atomizes. this is probably a very useful thought process for a lot of people! as i’ve said, the capacity to accept difference without articulating frankly arbitrary ‘bad’ kinds of difference (i mean ‘don’t talk to me if you support he/him lesbians’ not like ‘i block pedos and terfs’, these being two distinct kinds of policing the conceptualization and expression of gender and sexuality, i have zero probz with the latter) is one that is really underdeveloped even among the Different community. but the problem is that that’s not the trajectory of queer theory— it’s a singular basic assumption for its practice.

the second thing isn’t really a beef so much as like… a thing to say. it’s that, okay, we’re articulating ourselves as different. we do so in order to insist on the importance, value, and normality of that difference. there is a widespread societal construct of normal, which is Good and Right and Moral. we seek to assert that we, too, are Good and Right and Moral, or that Good and Right and Moral do not meaningfully inhere in the practice or performance of sexuality and gender, or other things about these categories. does this identity have any meaning or coherence outside of that? now you might be like, jesus christ, who cares, this is our political reality and the discourse is still too much of a shitshow to be spitballing about our utopian gender and sexuality future. which is true! but think of it this way: out of gay and lesbian studies, out of gender and sexuality studies, we get the largely deconstructionist tool of queer theory. queer theory itself comes from a history of sexuality (both in the general sense that it’s enabled by the capacity to construct one, and it’s heavily enabled by foucault’s), and specifically from the fact that sexuality’s history is one which precedes and exceeds our labels and our capacity to assign them. so the question of what outcomes we imagine and desire in this coalition is also the question of our ability to articulate, beyond what we are, what the parameters of that we are. like this is just blah blah can we call sappho a lesbian-style discourse but at a more annoying lexile level. like if, and when, i call myself a lesbian, and queer, those are two different labels, with two different sets of implications for me and how i find community. how am i to conceptualize those identities beyond how they relate to me and my world? what sorts of histories can i construct or claim for myself and my community as a result? i’m kind of unconcerned with the issue of labeling as it relates to the past and the consent of those who we now perceive as voiceless, insofar as the problem there isn’t merely of labelling but of the ethics of historiography as a whole, on one hand, and the ethics and articulation of that label on the other.

and the other thing is that, like, are we required across history to identify ourselves in the negative space of society’s various enforced norms, and only ever by the impacts of its cudgel? (not conflating the two but) an interesting point of comparison is the work of someone like saidiya hartman, who i think would identify her work as african american studies well before calling it critical race theory, but also whose work is extremely formative in both fields and their intersections + collisions + entanglements(?). the legacy of enslavement is a historical record which extends in its effacement beyond the typical one-sidedness inherent in all historiography, and the critical practice hartman develops in response to the violent construction of this archive is fabulation, which is creative and generalizing. again, not conflating race and sexuality. different tools and methods and histories. the point really is just that theory produces histories in ways which are extremely important to how we conceptualize both community & justice, and what futures we imagine for those concepts, & i think hartman’s one of the more important examples of this.

this is long bc i’ve always kind of thought queer as in identity and queer as in theory are functionally different terms but with obvious and far-reaching interconnections, and i’m trying to substantiate that. maybe my point is that i don’t see the point of being like “i’m queer and that entails theory” when what you seem to mean is that, like, all labels have an underlying theory, rather than like, actual queer theory, or the obligation to engage in/with theory. arguably the point here is that in practice is not in theory, and the problem with theory is always of moving between the general to the particular, which i think is too rarely considered as a matter of time/history as well. what does articulating queerness mean going forward, and looking back? and if you’re like this Literally doesn’t matter then like, cool, awesome, so we agree they’re separate concepts because the question of history is inextricable from our capacity to engage in queer theory. as you were

#discoursing lmao #SORRY THIS SOMEHOW DIDNT POST AS A READMORE INITIALLY

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redwineconversation · 2 years

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On Blind Devotion

I saw an exchange on social media yesterday that irked me quite a bit, so I thought I'd vent a little / chat about it, because that's the easiest way to work through my emotions, I guess.

So here's the thing: I hate blind devotion, in all aspects of life, but especially in celebrities / athletes / sports. I hate it. I absolutely hate it.

Here's the thing: your favorite player, and your favorite club, will disappoint you. They will say or do something that you disagree with. Their actions will not match your expectations.

And that's fine. That's healthy, even. You need to know that eventually someone, somewhere along the line, will disappoint you. They will say or do the wrong thing and you will look at them and think I deserved better. And I think that's actually a really good thing.

What is not a good thing, what is not healthy, is blind devotion, a belief that a player or a team can do no wrong. It really irritates me, actually, when a player or a team is put on a pedestal because, like - are you really going to tell me there is no point in time, ever, when this player or team will go against your moral or ethical beliefs? I admire that kind of certainty but it is unrealistic. And, as I keep saying, unhealthy.

I love Lyon. I love - most of - the players. But I am not under the delusion that it is a perfect team with perfect players whom have done no wrong. And it's really, really unhealthy, borderline toxic, to belief that is the case.

It doesn't make you less of a fan to say "that player had a bad game" or "this player is acting like a dick" or "the team could have handled that transfer saga better." It doesn't make you less of a fan to say, "I don't like this player on my team".

You can have petty motives for disliking a player, as long as you acknowledge those reasons are petty. You have to be capable of self-reflection, I guess. I can like a player on my team because it suits me, and I can dislike a player because it suits me, and I can admit those reasons can fleeting and therefore far from absolute.

I can disagree with a player's choices. It doesn't make me less of a fan for doing so, apart from acknowledging we are different people with a different set of principles. As I said, those principles can be vain or more ingrained in my personality, but they are mine and cannot be forced on someone else.

I don't find "love is absolute" to be a convincing argument. In a healthy relationship you're going to have disagreements on some things. To agree on everything, all the time - that would be a red flag for me, because you're losing your individuality. You're losing your ability to say "No, I'm right" which in turns means down the road you lose your ability to say "No, I deserve better."

You can know a team for a very long time, and love it deeply, and still be disappointed in said team from time to time. You can have deep affection for a player, and consider them admirable - but to say that "they had a bad game" is too harsh a criticism, that just makes me uncomfortable.

You can have other priorities apart from watching a game. You can go out with friends for brunch or dinner or whatever. Maybe you want to sleep in one morning. You can love a team, and still prioritize your own life, and that doesn't make you less of a fan, either. It's healthy, in some ways, to know you can be independent.

The other thing that irks me, and it's somewhat related to blind devotion: be a dick to the opposing team if you want. It drives me nuts when people act like women's football should be a "positive family experience." I don't want handholding at a Lyon-PSG game, one with such a bitter, bitter rivalry. Let fans heckle opposing players. It goes beyond Lyon: I have no issue with Manchester United fans booing Alex Greenwood, for example, or Wolfsburg gleefully announcing that "London is Green" to Chelsea fans.

Proper rivalry games are rooted in bad blood and genuine dislike of each other. It's personal, and petty, and emotional. It also creates an atmosphere like no other. Why handhold and chant dumb chants when you can feel something other than subdued emotions?

I like winning. I especially like winning when it's against a team I dislike. Let people gloat, let them a dick, let them feel something other than muted emotions. Let fans take a step back and just say, "no, you want to win at my home, you are going to have to work for it."

Blind devotion just isn't healthy, it isn't. And to imply it is required to be a "true" fan - that's just such a dangerous path to go down, it really is.

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nextwarden · 2 years

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Don’t creators get a say as to how their characters and worlds are used by people who are not them and do not have the rights to these characters/worlds, though?

What if the creator says they don’t like ppl shipping their character with non-canon ships? Or that headcanoning their character as bi/queer and writing/drawing works where that is explored makes them uncomfortable... Where do you draw the line on what a creator has control over?

I mean, I'm no expert, nor a lawyer of moral and ethics, so... I don't know?

Personally, I don't believe I would have a problem with that kind of thing from fans of my work (to a certain extent, which I am not entirely clear on) but that's just me, and I'm not all creators, if barely one at all. So it doesn't help to give an answer.

I'm of the belief that if something bothers you in a work of art, you have the right (perhaps even the duty?) to stop interacting with it as much as you have the right to voice the fact that it made you uncomfortable. Instead of keeping on interacting with it and going on a scorched earth campaign to gatekeep everything that doesn't fit your personal/moral/ethical/enjoyment standards.

And from the point of view of a creator, it's the same. As the person who brought something to the world, I feel one should have some right of control over it.

Fan art is complicated because it's on the fringe of that, a new creation/transformative work but based on something that's not yours... What if someone took your bi/queer head-canon piece of transformative work and transformed it again to make it something completely new, something with an opposite message, one that goes against your beliefs? Would you be comfortable agreeing to let them do as they please?

I don't have a definite answer. All I'm saying is that taking away the creator's right to express their feeling over how their creations are used is crazy, and nullifying their voice because "now it's the fans' propriety" is plain wrong.

What I do believe though is that creators are under no obligation to endorse, appreciate or remain silent when people transform their works and getting angry/hating on them for wanting people to not use their work (characters, worlds, etc.), and for them voicing that, is stupid...

You don't have to agree with me, I'm not trying to convince anyone, just raising a counterpoint, but just imagine being the one in the situation of the creator and think about how that would impact you.

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adifferenttime · 3 years

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Andrew Ryan vs. Robert House

On almost every House post I make, someone in the notes will reliably reference Andrew Ryan. I totally get it - they look similar, they're based on the same guy, the parallels are so clear that the NV dev team added an achievement for killing House with a golf club - but I think these commonalities tend to engulf both characters, blotting out some of their more interesting ideological/personal differences. It's useful to examine them in relation to one another, but part of that is figuring out what distinguishes them, which is just what I’ve attempted to do.

It's difficult for me to talk about Randian objectivism because I don't think it's sound enough to address on its own terms, but considering this is the philosophy Andrew Ryan has adopted, I kind of have to. What I’d identify as the core premise of Randian ethics is this: altruism is a moral wrong. Some Randians have argued that isn't really what they believe - that the real point is anything resembling altruism is self-interest in disguise - but they're departing from the beliefs of their icon when they make those claims. Per Rand:

The irreducible primary of altruism, the basic absolute is self-sacrifice – which means self-immolation, self-abnegation, self-denial, self-destruction – which means the self as a standard of evil, the selfless as a standard of the good.

The way Rand defines altruism is by linking it to self-sacrifice, which she uses to differentiate it from kindness or benevolence. Aiding others at no cost to yourself is benevolent, but not altruistic, and therefore not evil. Sacrificing your happiness to help another human being is, from Rand's perspective, evil, as is any philosophy that prioritizes the other at the cost of the self. This whole idea has been broadly rejected by most scholars on account of it being really fucking stupid. What justifies the leap from "man is naturally selfish" to "selfishness is good"? If selfishness is moral, wouldn't the most moral behavior be to exploit others through whatever means necessary, favoring force over the market? Rand defines happiness as "using your mind’s fullest power," achievable only when you "do not consider the pleasure of others as the goal," but why is this the only definition? What if your only options are self-sacrificial in nature? How do you weigh them if neither sacrifice is linked to values, individual achievement, or "your mind's fullest power" at all? Rand didn't care because she was too busy trying to ethically justify cheating on her man with her best friend's husband, but nonetheless, this is the philosophy Andrew Ryan’s adopted. He claims that "Altruism is the root of all Wickedness," in what's almost a direct quote from Rand herself.

To that end, Ryan builds a system that doesn’t just accept selfishness but actively incentivizes it. Every other principle he expresses is subservient to the ideas that selfishness rules man, and that for Ryan to act on his own selfish impulses is the highest good in the world. His lesser political principles (individual liberties, negative rights, the creation of a stateless society) don’t matter to him as much as the central precept from which they stem: that selfishness is his moral imperative.

What is the greatest lie every created? What is the most vicious obscenity ever perpetrated on mankind? Slavery? The Holocaust? Dictatorship? No. It's the tool with which all that wickedness is built: altruism.

It doesn't come as a particular surprise to me when he starts imprisoning dissidents or executing rivals or banning theft (standard practice in most societies, but not what an egoist would pursue; if you can get away with taking it, you deserve to have it, or so the thinking goes). I’ve seen him described as a hypocrite, but I don’t think that’s necessarily true considering everything he does is in line with his opposition to altruism. He'll adhere to his other principles only if they don’t sabotage his pursuit of personal power. This is evident in the fact that he only adopts a negative perception of Fontaine when his own interests are threatened, but doesn’t give two shits what Fontaine might be doing to sow conflict and harm people before that point. A guy named Gregory asks Ryan to step in against Fontaine early on before Fontaine's fully established himself as a threat to Ryan's power, and Ryan's extremely blase about it.

Don't expect me to punish citizens for showing a little initiative. If you don't like what Fontaine is doing, well, I suggest you find a way to offer a better product.

Contrast this with how he reacts when Fontaine has risen as a genuine business rival. This is from the log titled "Fontaine Must Go."

Something must be done about Fontaine. While I was buying buildings and fish futures, he was cornering the market on genotypes and nucleotide sequences. Rapture is transforming before my eyes. The Great Chain is pulling away from me.

This double standard is the natural outgrowth of his prioritization of self-interest. If your most deeply-held belief is that you should never give up your interests for others, ancillary rules become flexible in times of personal crisis, and Bioshock makes the case that putting someone like that in charge of a city will leave you with a crumbling, monstrous ruin.

Superficially, House has some similarities. Ryan executes political rivals; House has you blow up a bunker of his ideological opponents. Ryan is the highest authority in Rapture; House is the absolute monarch of Vegas. Their goals and moral codes, though, are almost diametrically opposed. When you ask House why you’re expected to trust him when he’s openly admitting to installing himself as the despot of the New Vegas Strip, he says this:

I have no interest in abusing others... Nor have I any interest in being worshipped as some kind of machine-god messiah. I am impervious to such corrupting ambitions.

Most of his resources are devoted to large-scale, impersonal projects, aimed either at building the power of Vegas or securing his long term goal of “progress” as he sees it. He’s rejected selfishness as a moral good because House is very far from Randian objectivism. He's a Hobbesian monarch.

In that respect, he shares an outlook on human nature with Ryan that I deeply disagree with (that human beings are essentially selfish), but in terms of what that means for the structure of a utopian society, House takes a very different position. From his perspective, human nature breeds suffering, not industriousness, and the only way to stamp out conflict - and, in a post-nuclear age, ensure the continued survival of the human race - is through a strong sovereign. The purpose of a state as laid out in Leviathan aligns very, very closely with the one House expresses.

...the foresight of their own preservation, and of a more contented life thereby; that is to say, of getting themselves out from that miserable condition of war which is necessarily consequent, as hath been shown, to the natural passions of men...

The monarch's successes are reflected in his society and the well-being of humanity as a whole. To subvert his goals is to subvert society's goals, and to doom humanity to the war, death, and suffering that exist in a state of nature. When you destroy his Securitrons/kill him, he doesn't plead for himself or get offended on his own behalf. He accuses you of betraying not him, but mankind.

Single-handedly, you've brought mankind's best hopes of forward progress crashing down. No punishment would be too severe. Fool... to let... personalities... derail future... of mankind? ...Stupid! Slavery... the future of... mankind? What... have you... done?

An important corollary of this idea which again distinguishes House from Ryan appears in Leviathan’s description of the political/moral responsibility of a monarch to his subjects:

...that great Leviathan, or rather, to speak more reverently, of that mortal god to which we owe, under the immortal God, our peace and defence. For by this authority... he hath the use of so much power that, by terror thereof, he is enabled to form the wills of them all, to peace at home, and mutual aid against their enemies abroad.

Hobbes and House give the monarch virtually unlimited power but match it to the monarch's duty, which he lives to fulfill. His obligation is to speak for the people, act for them, and protect them from all threats, internal and external. House generally abides by this, orienting his decisions around his goals for society irrespective of the personal cost (the negative consequences of his actions are a product of his fucked evaluations of what’s best for society, not personal greed). It’s not just a departure from Ryan’s philosophy but a complete refutation of it. He's almost died for what he's misidentified as the greatest good.

Given that I had to make do with buggy software, the outcome could have been worse. I nearly died as it was…. I spent the next few decades in a veritable coma.

This is not the behavior of an egoist. This is the behavior of an extremely arrogant but marginally altruistic (from a Randian perspective lmao) guy. This is some distorted “from each according to his ability” shit if you’ve managed to convince yourself your abilities exceed those of everyone else who has ever lived and that you can get the Mandate of Heaven by being really good at statistics.

The reason these guys develop such similar structures and hierarchies despite the ideological gulfs between them is because both of them are elitists who’ve experienced a massive failure of self-consciousness. They’re unable to conceive of other people as being fundamentally like them. Ryan separates people into the clearly-delineated classes of “producer” and “parasite,” ignoring the fact that everything he’s ever “produced” was reliant on a huge, coordinated effort between workers, architects, accountants, middlemen, and others, all of whom, in conjunction, contributed more to the realization of his dreams that he ever could have alone. Rather than realizing his own position is more parasitic and reliant on other people’s labor than that of anyone else in Rapture, he adheres to his doctrine of selfishness even when it’s not reflective of reality and is ruining the the lives of an entire city of people. He deludes himself into believing he’s a superman among ants instead of one flawed man who is reliant on the goodwill of others to help him survive, as are we all.

House, too, thinks he’s exceptional. Unlike Ryan, he acknowledges the necessity of the worker to a functioning society, but while he’ll accept his reliance on that labor, he doesn’t trust the laborer enough to share political power. House knows he’s invested in humanity’s survival and the creation of a better world, but he refuses to consider that he might not be alone in this goal. He chalks up the existence of the Legion to fanaticism/the ambitions of a sultanistic dictator and attributes everything the NCR has done to greed, without it ever occurring to him that the massive harm these nations have done was partially motivated by the same goals he’s devoted himself to - and that the atrocities he’s committed since his rise to power are, in some respects, very similar. House knows himself to be invested in the well-being of humanity, but he’s too arrogant to ask himself if his methods are wrong or trust other people to build a new path, one that doesn’t necessitate his complete control over the land and people of the Mojave. Ryan and House’s worldviews are distinct, and their flaws, as highlighted by their respective narratives, say some interesting things about how each set of devs view power and the pitfalls of elitism.

Anyway. If you put these two men in a room, they would probably try to murder each other, and I think that’s great.

#Robert House #Andrew Ryan #fallout meta #bioshock meta #fnv #bioshock #fallout new vegas

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iamanartichoke · 3 years

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I started typing this in the tags of this post, and it got too long, and then I was going to just reblog the post with this as an addition but that got too long too, and I've been meaning to make a post addressing free will vs. predestination since the premiere anyway, so - here we go. Spoilers, obviously.

Cut for length and spoilers. Please blacklist #loki tv series spoilers, #loki series spoilers, and #loki spoilers.

This is kinda rough and I'm not sure it actually makes any sense but I'm posting it anyway.

I realize that the post is a joke, obviously (and it is hilarious) but I started thinking about the implications and couldn't stop because it's honestly a goldmine of existential reflection and an inevitable crisis or three.

Let's look at a scenario.

Say you're late to work for reasons totally beyond your control: your neighbor stopped you to ask a question on your way out the door; you swung through the drive-thru for a quick coffee but the person in front of you is ordering a full continental breakfast ffs (this happened to me this morning); there was an explosion and then the Winter Soldier randomly dropped from the sky and landed on the hood of your car. Whatever. Shit happens.

So you're late, but on this particular day, your lateness somehow has consequences that lead to and create a nexus event and the next thing you know, you're being arrested, tried, convicted of time crimes and ultimately (a version of you is) erased from existence.

And this is if it's not even your fault you're late.

Now say that you're late and it is your fault. You took a new route on a whim and drove a little more slowly because you passed a particularly pretty meadow; you hit the brakes at a yellow light instead of speeding through bc you wanted the quick chance to check your email; you sat in your car for a few extra minutes in the parking lot, because maybe your job sucks and you really needed those extra minutes today to psyche yourself up into getting out of the car and going inside and clocking in.

These little choices are you exercising your free will. Because to me, free will is all or nothing - it doesn't just apply to the big decisions.

On the other hand, predestination means that regardless of the choices you make or if it's a big decision or not, everything you do is ultimately going to lead you to a set point or position or place (your destiny).

And I can kind of look at it like a GPS - that is, there are a number of "insignificant" choices you could make and they will still lead you to where you're predestined to go. Like how a GPS will reconfigure your route if you miss your exit on the highway. It doesn't matter if you took Route A or Route B, you're still going to end up at your destination.

But say sometimes the route does matter. Say that there are certain scenarios in which there's only one road (for example, 14 million losses vs 1 win) and you can only get on it by following a specific series of events and what determines the ultimate outcome is whether or not you're late to work that day.

If you decide to wait those extra five minutes in the parking lot, that means that you weren't in your cubicle at 9:03 when Stanley from Accounting wandered by with his giant stack of papers, and when Mary Sue said hello to him, he got distracted and tried to wave and ended up dropping those papers. Had you been at your cubicle, you'd have swooped down to help him but since you weren't there, Stanley is crouched on the floor alone and doesn't notice Joe coming at him with a paper trolley so when he stands up, he and Joe collide and Stanley loses his balance and goes face-first toward the trolley and breaks his nose when he hits the metal handle on his way down.

Now Stanley has to go to the hospital to get his nose set because you wanted to sit in your car and spend five extra minutes hating your life that morning.

If the sacred timeline says that Stanley is supposed to be in that ER at that specific time on that specific day, and no other set of circumstances would get him there, because this will ultimately take Stanley down the road to whatever greater journey he's supposed to go on, then it has to happen. But say you exercise your free will and decide not to wait those five minutes, because the free will applies to every choice you make, even the tiny, insignificant ones. You chose to put on your big person pants and took a deep breath and just head inside - and because you chose to do that and because you were at your cubicle to help Stanley with his papers, Stanley never ends up in the ER and the timeline that's supposed to happen is suddenly at risk and the TVA has to get involved (I assume).

So having free will introduces way, way too many variables into a fixed timeline to ever keep track, because you're taking these tiny, seemingly insignificant choices that people are making every minute of every day, and you're multiplying them by trillions of sentient beings in the universe, and you're saying the fate of the timeline and reality itself depends on all of these beings either always making the choice they're supposed to make or constantly sending the TVA out whenever they don't.

It's fair to conclude, then, that both free will and a fixed, single timeline can't exist at the same time. Either you adhere to the fixed timeline and everyone does exactly what they're supposed to do every second of every minute of existence, or you have free will and autonomy over all of your decisions, no matter how big or small, and those decisions can result in a number of outcomes, ultimately leading you to one of several possible destinations.

Case in point: Tony didn't have to snap his fingers in Endgame. He chose to. Had he not, Thanos would have won. It doesn't matter if there was one way to victory or 14 million ways to failure; the timeline could ultimately only go one of two ways and the choice Tony willingly made determined that Thanos lost. It wasn't predetermined because if Tony had not chosen to snap his fingers, the timeline would have gone the other way.

My personal belief - and this isn't necessarily for the MCU, but in general - is that we do possess free will and the future is ever shifting and changing because nothing is written in stone. It holds up against most, if not all, of the world's belief systems. For example, if you believe that people have guardian angels, the rule is generally that your guardian angels can help you but you have to ask them; they can't decide to intervene without your permission because to do so would infringe upon your free will.

Similarly, you can go on etsy and pay $5 for a funsies psychic reading or pay a lot more money for an in-depth, specific tarot reading and both will tell you that the outcomes may change depending on the paths you take, and that their ultimate advice is for you to keep your focus on your goals and your own self so that you can be subconsciously manifesting the best possible future for yourself. (Not that I know this from experience. It was one time. It was a few times. My point stands, and also stop judging me.)

To get back to the MCU, though - if you determine that both a single, fixed timeline and free will can't simultaneously exist, and your ultimate purpose is upholding said timeline and not letting anyone fuck it up, lest it break off into lots of different branches, then it poses a pretty serious moral and/or ethical question of - who decides what choices we make and what paths we're destined for? The time lizards? Who gave them that authority? Did anyone, or did they just manifest themselves into existence one day, create the universe, and then decide all of the rules (and, if so, where does that leave the norns and the gods and other super powerful beings who are generally thought to be in charge of things)?

If free will doesn't exist and everyone is acting based on what has been predetermined for them by some higher being (or, in this case, time lizards), it takes away our autonomy, and if everything we do and every single tiny step we take is decided for us, what makes us any different than cogs in a machine just following orders? What separates us from robots?

Speaking of robots, it's interesting to me that the TVA's screening process (if you can call it that) has a failsafe against robots specifically. Any robot that might come through is destroyed immediately and in this case, “not a robot” is defined, more or less, as a sentient being that possesses a soul. What does the TVA have against robots if their ultimate goal is ensuring that the robotic machinations of the time lizards are consistently carried out to protect the sacred timeline?

A soul makes you human; the energy of the soul is what you, at the core, are. It can be assumed that having a soul also means that you have some sort of moral and ethical code by which you live your life but, if you don't also have free will, then what is the point of possessing a soul and a moral and ethical code?

Loki is a villain and he's told by Mobius, the TVA, Odin, and pretty much everyone who ever meets him that the only thing he's good for - the only reason he exists - is to cause pain and suffering and death. This has been predetermined for him; this is not his fault and he did not choose it. And every single choice he makes has either already been destined as the choice he was supposed to make, or will be pruned so it won't grow into the wrong timeline. Ultimately Loki can change neither his final destination, nor the purpose and meaning of his existence.

Which leads me to the theory that the several Loki variants that the TVA keeps coming across are the result of Loki consistently resisting against his predetermined path; he's trying to find the timeline where he is able to latch onto and keep his own free will in defiance of the timekeepers but, so far, he hasn't been successful. This could segue into why the current Variant is now going scorched earth and just obliterating the main timeline completely - because if there is no sacred timeline, there's nothing dictating who or what Loki can be, and free will is regained. If there's a multiverse that branches and branches beyond anyone's control, then there must be a branch in there, somewhere, where Loki can exist on his own terms and decide how his own story goes.

This also might be a theory for why Loki is already setting his sights on taking over the TVA (assuming that's not just something he told the variant for reasons). But my original point in delving into all this is to ask: if Loki is predestined to always be a villain whose story plays out exactly the same way because that's what's supposed to happen, then how can anyone ever hold his misdeeds against him? He's literally just existing as the timekeepers decided he would exist and everyone is blaming him for it.

And this leads me to ask, as well, if one's soul is generally good, and one possesses more good traits than bad, what is the logic in making them exist only for pain and destruction? If it's for a greater good, then it stands to reason Loki is not the only one predestined for misery, and what greater good could come from all that suffering?

Conclusion: the existence of the TVA as an organization means that there is one fixed, sacred timeline but the existence of said timeline is immoral and unethical because it means no one actually has any free will at all in the MCU. The very notion of heroes and villains is pointless because it has nothing to do with your own qualities or morality, it's literally the luck of the draw. In order to have free will, the sacred timeline has to be destroyed, and so my prediction is that the Big Bad of the Loki series is not the TVA and not the time keepers but the actual timeline itself, and the entire fate of the MCU rests on whether or not Loki can ultimately succeed.

Also, don't be late for work.

#well this was a journey #smfh #i hope it at least makes *some* sense #loki series meta #loki tv series spoilers #loki series spoilers #loki spoilers #long post #i should have revised this before posting lmao #i went back and edited some of it but meh #it's pretty nonsensical i think but also i confuse myself really easily so

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