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peaceisadirtyword · 1 year

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Pull the Trigger IX (Modern!Ivar/Reader)

A/N: Hello! A bit late, sorry! I just got home🥲 I’ll try to post the next chapter as soon as I can🫶🏼

Warnings: mild smut👀 mentions of past abuse, mentions of alcohol, anxiety...

Words: 4412

Read on AO3

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Alfred had cancelled on you. Apparently, he had missed an important date with Elsewith and he had gotten a last minute reservation on a very expensive place to apologise. You understood, but couldn’t help but sigh in disappointment when you saw his text. Thora was out with Hvitserk again. Since they had formalised their relationship it was almost like they spent even more time together than before. She had insisted on staying with you, but you practically forced her to go, feeling too guilty for having ruined her big night some days ago.

Almost a week had passed, and you had hoped you could talk to Alfred about what Ivar had said to you. You hadn’t had the chance to do it earlier, as the last time you saw him you had spent hours crying because of Erik. You had never seen Alfred so angry at someone, and while it was comforting, you still were overthinking Ivar’s words.

But then again, he didn’t contact you anymore. He wasn’t in class that week, and he was nowhere to be found on campus. You had his number and could have easily texted him, but then again you didn’t know what to say.

Because you weren’t sure of what he had said.

He was at Valhalla. You knew it because Ingrid had texted you, telling you she had seen him inside when she had entered, and you had tried to convince yourself you didn’t care, but a part of you couldn’t stop thinking about it. You had gone through Ubbe’s posts on social media until you found him at the background of one of his videos. Sigurd had also posted things but as the brothers couldn’t stand each other you didn’t bother to look for Ivar in his videos. Thora had told you they’d head to Valhalla around midnight, so you kept glancing at the clock, knowing that Hvitserk was the one that would post the pictures of Ivar, given they were the closest ones.

You just wanted to see him, to see he was okay, because even if you had tried your best not to acknowledge it, you missed him. You would be forever mad for not remembering most part of that night, when you had slept in his bed and he had taken care of you. The simple thought made you feel something strange that was both worrying and comforting at the same time.

Taking a deep breath, you got up from the couch and entered the bathroom for a quick shower. The horrible movie you were watching was forgotten as you entered your room, immediately opening your wardrobe to try and find something to wear. After almost crying a few times, you decided on a black velvet dress. It was short and had cleavage, not quite what you’d usually wear for a night out, but Valhalla wasn’t a normal club and it was very far from your usual trusted bar, so you put on some thighs and your favourite tall boots that Thora had gifted you last Christmas because of how many times you’d ask her for hers.

After frowning at your own reflection for a good ten minutes before moving back to the bathroom to wash your face and put some makeup on. Half an hour later you were ready, picking up your phone, wallet and keys and quickly turned off the TV and the lights, leaving your flat before you could change your mind.

Calling an Uber was way more than your bank account could afford, so you took the bus and walked towards the club, hoping Ivar would still be there when you managed to get in. It was cold, and the slow queue didn’t help. You checked your phone a few times until you realised the battery was very low. Thora had messaged you, asking if everything was okay, you replied quickly, telling her you were fine and debating whether you should tell her you were at the club or not.

But just when you were going to do so, the doorman called you. The rest of the queue looked at you up and down, some of them with annoyance and even hatred, but you didn’t say a word as the doorman lifted the rope, letting you in.

Flashbacks of the first time you stepped into that club made you take a deep breath as you left your coat on the wardrobe next to the door and thanked the girl that took it with a tense smile. You didn't even know what you were doing there, you didn’t know what you would say to Ivar if you could talk to him. You made your way to the VIP zone, your heart racing when you saw Whitehair. Wherever he was, Ivar was never too far away.

Your eyes finally found him. He was standing, leaning on his crutch and with a drink on his other hand. But you stopped walking towards him when you saw who he was talking to.

It was a woman, a tall, beautiful woman with brown hair. You could only see her back, but your mouth dried when you saw her curves, hugged by a beautiful red dress. You were sure she was stunning, and Ivar was so close to her, talking to her…

You felt like throwing up, suddenly you were the idiot that had come all the way to Valhalla to talk to him after not hearing from him in days. Thinking he liked you.

Looking around, feeling the tears fill your eyes, you took a deep breath. Should you get a drink or just go home?.

When you looked back towards Ivar, you found his eyes. He looked surprised to see you there, and you could see his lips saying your name, but you turned around and left for the toilets, unable to face him at that moment. Then you heard him calling you a bit louder, but you were already entering the women’s toilet and ignored him. Great, now he knew you were there. That was even more humiliating.

There were two girls inside the bathroom, talking cheerfully as they retouched their makeup, who looked at you as soon as you barged in, clearing your throat. They looked at you up and down, frowning, but you didn’t even look at them, running your hand through your hair and taking another deep breath.

Your relief didn’t last, as someone else entered the bathroom and startled the girls.

“You” Ivar pointed at them “Out”

They didn’t say a word. Instead, they grabbed their things and left quickly, barely glancing at you as they closed the door behind them.

“This is the girls’ bathroom” you said, looking anywhere but at him.

“I don’t care, toilets don’t have a gender” he replied, annoyed.

“Someone could enter…”

“Whitehair is outside” he interrupted you, shrugging “What are you doing here?”

“I don’t even know” you muttered, turning back to the mirror to try and fix your makeup “I guess I wanted to talk to you”

“Did anything happen?” he frowned in confusion “Did Erik…?”

“No, don’t say his name” you sighed “No, not everything is about him, I just wanted to talk to you because you said things the last time I saw you that I… Have been thinking about it, but I don’t know what to think and it’s killing me, but then I come here and I see you with someone else and I realise I’m an idiot and you probably didn’t mean what I thought you meant and now I really want to be alone…”

“Wait, wait, slow down” he frowned, interrupting you “Someone else?”

“Yes, the girl you were talking to, I just… I misunderstood what you told me the other day, it’s my fault, now if you excuse me…”

“Wait, let me talk” he grabbed your arm as soon as you tried to walk towards the door “That girl you saw me talk to is my sister”

You felt as if someone just threw a bucket with ice and water all over you.

“Your… Sister?”

“Yes, well, my half sister, Gyda” he shrugged “She’s my dad’s daughter but her mother is Lagertha, she’s Björn’s sister, she lives in Hedeby with her mother but she came to Kattegat to visit us”

“I…” you groaned again, closing your eyes. If you thought nothing could be more humiliating than thinking Ivar was with someone else when you came to see him, you were wrong “Sorry, I… Never saw your sister before”

“Were you jealous?”

Flustered, you looked away again. Ivar had a smirk on his lips and his cocky expression only made you want to hit him really hard.

“No” you scoffed “I’m just… I didn’t want to interrupt you”

“Well, you did interrupt me with your dramatic escape and making me chase you” he chuckled “I’m not complaining, though”

Rolling your eyes, you finally looked at him, realising you couldn’t escape now and had to tell him exactly what you had come to tell him.

“The other day…” you sighed “You said you cared about me”

He hummed, nodding his head and almost pouting. His eyes were widened and you had to force yourself to stop looking into them.

“I’m not sure I understand what you meant by that”

Ivar sighed, rubbing his face with his free hand.

“You are dense sometimes, did you know that?”

You gasped, offended.

“And you are rude” you replied, scoffing.

“I was going to kiss you” he ignored you “And you still don't understand what I meant?”

You were left speechless. It was true that you had thought about it, but there was a part of you that insisted that it couldn’t be true. That you weren’t the kind of girl Ivar Lothbrok would like.

“I didn’t know if I had imagined it or not, I just…”

“Can I kiss you?” he interrupted you again, and you blinked a couple of times “Now, so you stop talking”

“Okay, you are very rude, and if this is your way of flirting let me tell you it won’t…”

You didn’t get to finish that sentence, because Ivar leant in to press his lips against yours. You gasped in surprise, but closed your eyes as soon as he deepened the kiss, his free hand landed on your waist, and you let yourself relax between his body and the sink behind you. His lips were warm, and tasted a bit like alcohol and cigarettes, but they were sweet and softer than you had imagined. Because you had imagined it. Even though no one of your daydreams was nearly as good as the actual kiss. You almost felt like you had never been kissed before, and his scent felt almost intoxicating when you breathed into it.

Ivar hummed against your lips, making you sigh at the sound. You weren’t sure of when exactly you started to like Ivar that much but you felt unable to kiss anyone else after that kiss, especially when he broke it, moving away just a few centimetres just to chuckle and give you a small peck before you could even open your eyes.

His blue eyes were the first thing you saw when you finally opened yours, and you could feel the heat underneath your skin and hear your accelerated heartbeat. You wondered, embarrassed, if he could also notice.

“Sorry, I just have wanted to do that for a long time” he said, tilting his head with his smirk back on his lips. You cleared your throat.

“That was also very rude of you”

“It was also very rude of you to interrupt my conversation with my sister” he shrugged “We’re even”

“I didn’t interrupt it, I…”

“You did, by running away after getting my attention, jealous” he leant in again to whisper against your ear. You didn’t know if he put that with many other girls, but it was definitely working because you almost moaned “And wearing this”

His free hand, which he had leant on the sink to support his weight, tugged at your dress, making you look down.

“I had to wear it because otherwise I wouldn’t have entered your elitist, corrupted club”

He laughed then, shaking his head.

“The doorman knows who you are, you would get in even if you were wearing a t-shirt and sweatpants”

“Well, I decided not to risk it” you shrugged, trying not to overthink his words -because if you did you would probably start hyperventilating.

Ivar smiled again. Obviously he had drunk, being way more relaxed than you had ever seen him. Was that the real Ivar?

“I thought you wouldn’t want to talk to me” you bit your lip “I thought you hated me”

“I beat up a guy that drugged you, Y/N”

“Yes, but that’s just your mob boss complex”

“I’m going to ignore that”

“But you called me a bitch” you crossed your arms, forcing him to move slightly backwards “And you said my life was worthless”

Ivar sighed, nodding and closing his eyes.

“You really got on my last nerve, but you’re lucky, others ended up dead for less”

You rolled your eyes, an amused smile on your lips.

“Stop doing that, I don’t believe you, you act like you’re all dangerous, cruel and heartless but there you were taking care of me when I couldn’t even walk, you’re just a normal guy”

Ivar shrugged, but he didn’t look bothered by your comment. In some way, you could see why so many people were afraid of him, he could be intimidating. But he had just asked for permission to kiss you and then had interrupted you with a kiss… He couldn’t be that bad.

“That’s the point” he licked his lips, shrugging again “I’m not meant to be dangerous to you”

“I’m serious”

“About what?”

“You act like that but then you come to my house to bring me my clothes and see if I’m okay, and then you start yelling and almost kiss me but then don’t talk to me for days…”

“Isn’t it obvious, Y/N?”

You knew it was obvious, but at the same time it was too obvious to be real. Everything seemed more of a fantasy you had built inside your head in which Ivar Lothbrok liked you even before you talked to each other for the first time. And for some reason that thought didn’t bother you, quite the contrary, it made you fluster and smile like an idiot.

“No, I want you to say it” you took a deep breath “Loud and clear, no indirects”

Ivar looked taken aback, almost like no one had ever asked him to talk about his feelings before. Looking around, he stepped back, suddenly nervous. He felt his mouth drying and a strange feeling in his stomach. He was nervous. Him, who had killed people in cold blood, who dealt with terrifying people that doubled his age and experience, who had had guns pointed at him and his brothers and that was used to deal with people that wanted him dead was a nervous wreck in front of a girl that asked him to talk about his feelings for her.

Well, it wasn’t just a girl, it was you.

Ivar still remembered the first time he had seen you. Sitting next to Alfred, you were frowning down at your notes and comparing them with his while he laughed. Then he had seen you many times around campus, you were all the time with Thora or Alfred, but whenever you were alone he never dared to approach you. Until one day Hvitserk saw him looking at you, and Ivar had made him look at your friend. She’s cute, Hvitserk had said, but his smirk had told him he had liked her.

And then he only had to wait. Ivar hoped you’d never heard about the fifty kroner he gave to that girl that sat next to him to go up and seat next to Alfred. Just to have you close, as he knew it was the only time you’d be close to him.

He was glad to see he had been wrong for the first time in his life.

“I…” he cleared his throat, his heart was beating so hard against his chest that he was afraid of you hearing it, and also of having a heart attack “I care for you”

You raised your eyebrow.

“Is that all I’m getting? After you barging into my house to yell how you tricked your brother into dating my best friend because you couldn’t talk to me”

Ivar couldn’t believe you had memorised his exact words.

“I didn’t barge, you invited me in”

“That’s not the point”

Ivar took a deep breath, and when his blue eyes looked right into yours again you almost groaned out loud.

“I like you, Y/N” he said. It was the first time you saw him being somewhat vulnerable. His cheeks were reddened, he kept biting his lower lip softly, looking everywhere but at you, his head down. Almost like a teenager waiting for a scolding.

You couldn’t help your lips curving softly with a smile. You also felt flustered. Hell, your heart was beating so fast you could barely hear anything over it. Ivar gulped, suddenly watching you carefully. Please, don’t laugh, don’t make fun of me.

He didn’t like to feel vulnerable or open, he didn’t want anyone knowing he liked you, not even you, because it was the only effective weapon that could really hurt him.

“So you’re not heartless after all”

It was a mere whisper, but he heard you perfectly fine, even if he didn’t reply. What was he supposed to say? That you couldn’t tell anyone? That it was fine if you didn’t feel the same?. He skipped all of that during his teenage years and had no idea of how he was supposed to react.

But he didn’t need to. Suddenly you approached him, making him freeze and grab his crutch tighter than ever. He’d swear he heard it crack, but he didn’t really care because you grabbed his neck and pulled him down as you got on your tiptoes, kissing him.

It was almost like your warm lips melted him. Literally. Ivar couldn’t recall a moment in which he had felt so hot. He leant against the closest wall he had, letting the crutch fall to the floor just to touch you with both hands. You glanced at the thrown crutch quickly, but his lips against your jaw and travelling down your neck distracted you. He was intoxicating, warm, his scent made you dizzy and the way he was kissing you… His lips captured your upper lip, and he kissed you with urgency, passion and need, almost like he’d die if he stopped.

You weren’t complaining, though. His hands had found their way to your ass, but they kept touching you everywhere, leaving a warm, tickly path behind. You jumped and gasped when his fingers brushed against the bare skin of your legs, and Ivar seemed to find that amusing. His hand was warm when he finally touched your thigh, and you felt a familiar wave travel down your lower belly and sex. You only broke the kiss to catch air for a couple of seconds before kissing him again. This time your hands travelled down his neck and shoulders, letting yourself touch his chest, hard and muscular from carrying his own weight for his whole life. Just when your hand reached his belt and his was already under your dress getting closer and closer, someone knocked on the door, startling you.

Then you realised you were about to have sex with Ivar Lothbrok in a public bathroom. Your last week self would have been very scandalised.

Stepping away, you turned to look at yourself in the mirror. Your lips were reddened and swollen and you were thankful for not having worn lipstick. Your eyes were teary and your makeup was a bit ruined, but you only smudged it a bit with your fingers and hoped everyone would be too drunk and it would be too dark to notice.

Ivar reached for his crutch, raising his voice to let Whitehair know he was fine. You wondered whether you should help and reach his crutch for him, but he managed just fine, knowing exactly which movements he needed to do. When he was standing again, he looked at you. His expression was softer. You couldn’t remember the expression he had when he had taken care of you, but you liked to think it was the same one.

“Ubbe is probably freaking out because I left” he shrugged “Do you want a drink?”

“I… Think I should go home” you cleared your throat “It’s late”

Ivar raised an eyebrow.

“I’ll take you home later”

You didn’t even try to argue, because you knew you’d stay. For some reason, you wanted to spend a bit more time with that new Ivar you were discovering. The one that didn’t act like a pretentious asshole.

His soft expression disappeared as soon as he opened the door. Whitehair looked at him and then at you, frowning and clenching his jaw. You couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow at him, making Ivar clear his throat and grab your arm quickly. The people queuing at the door didn’t say anything, but looked at you up and down and you instantly knew all of Kattegat would know you had been locked in a toilet with Ivar Lothbrok by morning.

You did smirk at Whitehair when you finally stepped in the VIP zone as he stayed at the entrance with a frown in his already harsh face. You could feel some people staring and just when you were thinking about texting both Thora and Ingrid to let them know you were there, someone practically tackled you, making you yelp and almost fall to the floor. Thora squealed in excitement and you could tell she had already had a few drinks when she looked at you, her cheeks reddened and a stupidly wide smile on her lips.

“You’re here!” she jumped next to you. Ivar glared at her, rolling his eyes, but Hvitserk asked him something and his attention diverted soon enough “Where were you? Ubbe told us you were here but that you disappeared suddenly… I was worried! Do you want a drink? Ingrid is here too!”

“Wow” you chuckled, grabbing her shoulders to keep her in place “Sorry, I had to go to the toilet… I found him on my way back and he told me you were here”

“Him being Ivar” she giggled, almost like it was a joke you didn’t get “Okay, a drink?”

You nodded, if you had to deal with the entire Lothbrok clan and drunk Thora you might as well get even.

You didn’t get a second to breathe, as soon as Thora left to grab you a drink, someone else approached.

She was even more stunning up close. Gyda had a beautiful, long hair that seemed to be brown but was darkened by the lowlights of the club. She wore a beautiful and probably very expensive red dress that you’d swear you had seen on some runway on YouTube. When the lights illuminated her face you could distinguish greenish eyes, more similar to Hvitserk than to Ivar’s, but you couldn’t tell the exact colour.

She shot you a big smile. She was older, older than you and Ivar, maybe in her thirties already, but she could have been twenty-five and you wouldn’t have been surprised. You only realised you were staring with your mouth agape until she spoke.

“Hello, you must be Y/N” she grabbed your hand enthusiastically “I’m Gyda, I’m Ivar’s sister… Half-sister” she chuckled “It’s great to finally meet you, I’ve heard a lot about you these days! Mostly from the boys teasing Ivar, but they were only good things, don’t worry”

You wondered what good things the Lothbrok brothers had to say about you, but decided to ignore it and smiled back at her shyly.

“Hi” you nodded “Yes, I’m Y/N, it’s great to meet you too”

“Wow, you’re really pretty” she looked almost excited, her eyes scanning you up and down, then she giggled “Ivar already said it, but I don’t trust his taste very often so I’m surprised, but you’re beautiful, I love your dress!”

“Why, thank you” you chuckled nervously, feeling mortified as her smile widened even more.

“Hvitserk told me you’re giving my littlest brother a hard time… Whatever you’re doing, he probably deserves it so you have my full support!”

“Okay, Gyda, that’s enough, thank you so much” an annoyed Ivar appeared beside you, glaring at his sister. She winked at you, amused, before turning around and leaving. You turned to Ivar with a frown.

“What are you telling your family about me?” you narrowed your eyes, Ivar rolled his eyes and sighed.

“Only your terrible taste in men and your inability to pay attention in class”

You scoffed, but your lips curved in a smile.

“Someone is calling you” he pointed at the bar, where Thora tried to grab your attention to point at the drink on her hand. Hvitserk looked more in love than ever next to her.

“I better go before she drinks it” you grimaced.

“Okay”

A moment of silence. Ivar looked at you with his soft expression that had disappeared as soon as you had left the toilet, but before you could act on your instincts and kiss him again, he turned around, going back to the couch where Ubbe was sitting talking to some people you didn’t know.

“Ivar” you reached to grab his hand before he could get too far, and the both of you froze almost instantly, realising what you had done. When he turned to look at you he had a surprised look on his face, which you were sure mirrored your own “Um… Thank you”

You didn’t specify why but he already knew. He nodded slowly as you let his hand go, hurrying to the bar where Thora waited for you. Ivar let himself fall on the couch next to his brother, looking around to make sure no one had seen that. Then he looked down, hoping the darkness would hide the stupid smile he had on his face.

Because it had been the first time you had called him by his name.

___________________________________

Tags: @istorkyou @barnes-lothbrok @naaladareia @youbloodymadgenius @southernbe @yummycastiel @nothingtolosebutweight @noway4u @cdauni @heavenly1927 @ivarhoegh @biancathecool @helleiaiwritting @marvelsangels @ironynoticony @kenyadakblalock @mymindfuckery @alexa4040 @tessakate @ivarlover @vannabanana1995 @darksoulgemx @mynameisiliana

I hope I didn’t forget anyone💔 thank you so much for reading🫶🏼

Ps. I will try and reply to all the comments this time!

#ivar imagine #ivar the boneless #ivar x reader #modern ivar #vikings #vikings imagine #modern vikings #pull the trigger

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peaceisadirtyword · 1 year

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Pull the Trigger VII (Modern!Ivar/Reader)

A/N: Hi!!🥰 I will be in Dublin when you guys read this so I truly hope Tumblr queues it correctly😭 Thank you so so much for the sweet comments on the last chapter, you guys are great♥️ This one is also a bit dark but no more SA triggers, no worries🫶🏼 Thank you for reading, I hope you like it!

Warnings: mentions of drugs (involuntary consume), alcohol, possible PTSD, violence, threats, Ivar gets (very) angry, but also a bit of fluff and softness.

Words: 2972

Read on AO3

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Your head was pounding almost like you had drunk an entire bottle of alcohol by yourself. The music coming from the party now sounded far away, and some parts of your body still ached from Erik's forceful grip. They also felt dirty.

In any case, you couldn't think straight. You had thrown up on the street when Ingrid had taken you out of that house. Now you'd swear she was sitting next to you, but couldn't be certain as you didn't dare to raise your head from between your legs.

“Y/N!"

You recognized that voice, but weren't sure of who it was. It wasn't until Thora kneeled in front of you and raised your head to take a look at you when you realised.

“Thora" your voice sounded like a whine and talking only made you feel worse.

“Oh my god" your friend sighed “Okay, you're okay, I've brought help, Y/N"

Hvitserk kneeled next to her, he cupped your head to try and make you open your eyes and look at him.

“She's conscious, that's a good sign" he said “Hey, Y/N, do you feel like throwing up?"

“She did when we came outside" Ingrid bit her lip “Then she kind of passed out and I freaked out, that's when I called you" she sounded nervous, and you just wanted to turn to her and tell her you were fine, but for some reason you couldn't “I woke her up with some water and I tried to make her eat something but she refuses"

“Y/N"

This voice you recognized almost instantly, forcing yourself to open your eyes and looking up to see a very angry Ivar standing next to you. You felt like crying then. That voice had been inside your head for days, unwilling to leave, why was he here now? Were you dying or something worse?

“Let's take her home" Hvitserk said, and Thora nodded before grabbing your other arm, helping Hvitserk to get you up. Ivar stepped forward and you grabbed his jacket unconsciously, sniffing and almost searching for comfort in his smell and warmth. For some reason, now you only wanted to cuddle him and sleep, touch him and hear his voice, in real life and saying nicer things than the last ones he had said.

“Look at me" he almost ordered, and you made the effort to look at him again. His face was more hypnotising than ever... Were his eyes so bright before? They almost looked like gemstones... “Who did this to you?"

You let out a sigh, almost sobbing and shaking your head. You couldn't think, you couldn't talk. You just wanted to get home.

“Was it Erik? Did Erik hurt you?" he asked again, lowering his voice “Answer me, tell me the name of the person who did this to you and I swear they won't see daylight again, princess"

You just nodded, not finding the words to tell him that you didn't care about Erik, only that he was there and you wanted him to take you home. For some reason.

Ivar looked at the entrance. You felt his entire body tense up but no matter how tightly you grabbed him, he still walked away too easily.

Hvitserk took you to the car, and you almost sighed in delight when you finally were able to sit on a comfortable seat. Ingrid and Thora climbed inside after you, and Hvitserk whispered something you couldn't hear.

“Ivar?" you muttered again, feeling nervous and lost now that he had disappeared again.

“I'll go get him" Hvitserk said to Thora, who nodded “I'll be right back"

He didn't have to look for him for too long. Erik stood next to the door. His lip was split and the annoying smirk had disappeared from his face. People had moved away from Ivar, who looked more than ready to murder someone.

“Next time you get even close to her I will put a fucking bullet inside your empty head" Ivar threatened, but Hvitserk grabbed his arm to hold him. He was trembling in rage, and Hvitserk feared he'd lose control once again.

“Ivar" he hissed “Let's go, there's too many people here"

“Do you hear me?!" he roared, and Hvitserk swore Erik shuddered.

“Ivar" his brother tried to pull him away, but he kept ignoring him “She's in the car, we need to leave, also she asked for you"

That seemed to calm him down. After spitting in Erik's direction, he turned around. Hvitserk almost groaned in desperation when Erik decided to talk.

“That fucking little bitch isn't even hot" he spat some blood, and Ivar stopped again “Good luck trying to fuck her, Boneless, you'll need it"

Hvitserk had to practically push Ivar outside the house and prayed that he didn't remember the gun he carried with him in his pocket. He could hear Erik laughing, but ignored him. They would take care of him soon.

_________________________________________

Helga was already there when Ubbe brought you inside the room. Ivar walked with his crutch as fast as he could behind his brother, cursing his legs for making him go so slow and also preventing him from carrying you there himself. The room Aslaug had always named "the infirmary" was a small living room that was used to treat Ivar outside the hospitals. He had forgotten how much time he had spent there, but it had everything one would need; a bed, monitors, and medical stuff that his father had purchased as soon as the doctors had said that he would be able to live a pretty normal life if he had constant medical care. Hospitals were okay for a few days, but also not as safe and too public sometimes, so they had installed a TV and bought shelves for books and it became the Lothbroks' play room, where his brothers would spend their evenings after school to keep him company.

Helga smiled warmly at him when he approached the bed in which Ubbe just left you. You were conscious, but could barely keep your eyes open and the light bothered you. She leant into you to examine you and you frowned.

“Was she feeling sick on your way here?" Helga asked, and Ivar shook his head.

“Her friend said she threw up when they were still at the party, and then passed out, but she was able to wake her up again"

“Good, she looks pretty conscious so she probably didn't drink much... Do you know what type of drug they gave her?"

Ivar shook his head again. The one familiar with drugs was Hvitserk, and he was on his way to take Ingrid home with Thora.

“Looks like ecstasy or GHB" he said “Probably, but I can't know for sure"

“Yes" her lips pressed together as she turned to you again, smiling softly “Hello, Y/N, my name is Helga, I'm a nurse but you're now at the Lothbrok's house" she continued talking softly, Ivar remembered that tone from when he was little “I'm going to place an IV on your arm now, okay? If you feel pain or you feel sick tell me"

You tried to nod, but barely could move your head. Ivar sat next to you.

“Hey" he said softly “Can you hear me?"

Again, his voice made you open your eyes, and instantly narrowed them to avoid the intense light.

“I'm..." you tried to speak again, turning your head only to widen your eyes when you saw the needle Helga had on her hands.

“Look at me" Ivar made you turn your head again, distracting you “Are you afraid of needles?" he chuckled “Needles scare you but I don't?"

You barely felt it when Helga placed the IV in your arm, but almost smiled at his words. It was frustrating how your body kept refusing to react the way you wanted.

“Relax" Ivar said again “You're safe here"

And just like that it was almost like they had taken an immense weight off your shoulders. Finally, you closed your eyes and relaxed, falling asleep almost instantly.

____________________________________

It was too quiet when you opened your eyes. The ceiling was spinning around and you had to shut your eyes again to avoid feeling sick, but groaned and rubbed your eyes. There was a dull pain on your arm and your head felt lighter and almost like you had drunk way too much.

It took you a few seconds to realise you weren't in your room. Or any room you were familiar with. And when you looked around after sitting up with some difficulties you were even more shocked when you saw Ivar Lothbrok looking right at you.

He had a book on his hands, the small lamp on a bedside table was on even though the rest of the room was dark. And he looked amused when you opened and closed your mouth a couple of times.

“Hello, sleeping beauty" he smirked.

“Where am I?" you groaned “God, I can't remember a thing... I was at Erik's party, he... I don't remember, I just remember..." the images of him pushing you inside a room and touching you flooded your mind, and you shook your head to make them go away “What are you doing here?"

“You're at my house" he explained softly, his tone was patient and comforting, definitely not a tone he had used with you before “Your drink was spiked, Erik drugged you" he sighed “We brought you here, and Helga gave you something to make you feel better" he pointed at your arm and you looked down to find a gauze on your inner bow “Then you fell asleep, it's four in the morning now, so you can go back to sleep"

You looked around again, still confused.

“You have a hospital in your house?"

He chuckled, shaking his head.

“A long story, now sleep"

“I... Would like to wash my face... Remove my makeup and change clothes" you muttered rubbing your face again. Just remembering Erik had touched you made you want to get into a shower and rub your skin until every single trace of his touch had faded. Then burn your clothes “Can I?"

Ivar nodded, and left the book on the table before reaching for his crutch and standing up. You stared at him while he moved to turn on the lights and turn off the small lamp.

“You can use my bathroom" he said “And my bed is more comfortable than this one, can you walk?"

You weren't very sure, but you nodded anyway, and put the blankets back to get out of the bed. You felt dizzy for a moment and Ivar had to hold you.

“I can't carry you" he whispered “But I can call one of my brothers and..."

“No, don't bother anyone" you shook your head “I'm fine"

The way to his bedroom was agonisingly slow. Ivar walked next to you, his arm behind your back in case he'd have to catch you if you fell, but luckily his bedroom was on the ground floor, not too far from the room you just left.

He turned on the lights. You would have liked to look around and see what he had, but you didn't dare to raise your head as you entered the bathroom as quickly as you could. You could barely make your way to the toilet and open it when you fell to your knees and threw up again. Luckily, the bathroom was adapted and quite large.

Coughing and sniffing, you felt the tears fall down your cheeks and startled when Ivar's hand pulled your hair away. His other hand remained on your back, caressing it slowly. You wanted to start sobbing, but you felt humiliated enough to hold it back and dry your tears with your hand.

Ivar didn't say anything. Instead, he took a clean towel to clean your mouth and your cheeks, and when you finally felt good enough to stand up again and looked in the mirror, you gasped.

It was like the blood had left your face. Your makeup was ruined, smudged around your eyes, your hair was also a mess, and the image only made you feel even worse.

“Sorry" you muttered, your lower lip trembling, when Ivar approached you after throwing the towel inside the laundry basket and reaching for a clean one.

“Don't be" he simply replied, and patted the marble counter just under the mirror “Come on, I'll remove your makeup"

You didn't have the strength to argue, so you sat on the counter so you could be more or less at his height while he wetted the towel.

His touch was soft and gentle, which you would've never imagined. He looked focused, his hand placed right next to you supported his weight.

“You were right"

His eyes fixed on yours, and his expression softened as he stopped. Finally, you got an excuse to stare at his face, that beautiful face you loved to hate.

“I always am" he replied, and his jaw clenched “But I swear to the Gods, I was hoping I would be wrong this time"

You sniffed again, looking down at your lap and smiling softly.

“Aren't you going to smirk and say: I told you so?"

“No" Ivar's fingers on your chin made you raise your head again as he continued to remove your makeup “I did punch him in the face, though, and I would have done way more if Hvitserk had let me" he pressed his lips together “I swear, the only thing I wanted was to make him suffer for as long as I could before putting a bullet between his eyes"

“Please don't..." you gulped, shaking your head “Put a bullet between anyone's eyes, it's... Violent"

Ivar smiled then, and your stomach fluttered, almost like you were on a rollercoaster ride.

“Violent doesn't even come close to describe what I will do to him" he whispered “You don't need to know the details, though, close your eyes"

You did as you were told, and the soft, warm towel started removing the makeup from your eyelids. He was so close to you that you could feel his breath hitting your lips, and you'd swear that made you even dizzier. You wanted nothing more than to lean in and press your lips against yours, but you stayed as still as you could, enjoying the closeness, the silence and the nice feeling of his touch.

_________________________

“I will give you some clothes” he muttered, and you nodded slowly as he left the bathroom, only to come back a couple of minutes later with a t-shirt and some sweatpants “They’re mine, but the only woman clothes in this house are upstairs and I…” he touched his leg, and you smiled softly at him.

“It’s okay, thank you”

He closed the door behind himself. You sighed again and turned to the mirror to wet your face.

When you were finished in the bathroom, you stepped into the bedroom again. Ivar had extended a few cushions and blankets on the floor and stood now shirtless in the middle of the room. You froze and widened your eyes.

Just before he turned around, you were able to admire his back. He had tattoos that started at his back, and tensed over his muscles when he moved, the ink lines travelled over his shoulders and arms and continued on his chest. You cleared your throat, your head felt even lighter now and you had to hold onto the door for a moment.

“I um… I can sleep on the floor if you prefer”

Ivar rolled his eyes as he slipped a grey t-shirt over his head. You almost pouted in protest when his masterpiece of a body got covered up.

“Shut up and get into bed, I’ll be right back”

You obeyed him. Maybe in any other circumstances you would have argued, told him he was no one to decide for you and that he couldn’t just tell you what to do, but the softness of the covers, the comfort of the bed and the unmistakable scent of Ivar that lingered on the pillows were more than enough to make you sigh in delight.

That was probably the best bed you had ever been in.

When Ivar left the bathroom, you heard how he threw the crutches away, before he spoke:

“I need to sit down on the bed to take off the braces, do you mind?”

You raised your head and stared at him, shaking your head slowly. The fact that Ivar Lothbrok had asked for your permission to sit on his own bed in case it bothered you blowed your mind. And also melted your heart a bit.

He groaned slightly when he started taking them off. The vast, iron braces fell to the floor, but Ivar kept touching his legs softly, taking deep breaths until he finally sat on the floor, crawling to the improvised bed he had built.

“Do they hurt?” you asked, your head back down onto the pillows. Now that he was on the floor you could see him while laying down.

He looked taken aback by your question, and his reply took a few seconds.

“Yes” he finally said “They hurt every day, but some days are better that others”

“What is it called?” you asked, biting your lip “Your disease”

“Osteogenesis Imperfecta” he replied, looking up at his own ceiling “Type IV”

You nodded slowly before reaching to turn off the lights. You felt sleepy now and your entire body felt heavy and numb.

“I’m sorry you’re in pain” you muttered “It sucks”

Ivar stayed silent. You could hear his breathing and how he moved between the blankets he had on the floor.

“Yeah” he said “It sucks”

______________________________________

#ivar imagine #ivar the boneless #modern ivar #ivar x reader #vikings #vikings imagine #modern vikings #pull the trigger

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