#the fact that he was so hopeless in the first chapters make it even better

[soulless-bex]

am i the only one who, while reading “dreams come true”, was both surprised and overwhelming happy to learn that ray is into art? no? just me?

look at him, so happy

#this boy literally wrote down ‘seeing the mona lisa’ as his dream #its adorable #tpn ray #tpn #the promised neverland #tpn dreams come true #the fact that he was so hopeless in the first chapters make it even better #he still wanted to see art #AND EMMA GOT TO SEE HER GIRAFFES #WHICH IS ALMOST BETTER #THE POOR GIRL STILL LOVES THEM #the fact that she got to ride one felt like the correct way to conclude this series

[loki-cees-all]

Chapter 7 - All the Tiring Time Between {TLTGYA - Post!TVA Loki x OFC Longfic}

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Pairing : Post-TVA!Loki x Oliviette (OFC)

Chapter Summary : Sometimes the sharpest boundaries require the gentlest touch.

Chapter W/c : 8.7k words

Chapter Tags / Content : Angst (as always), brief mentions of blood and injuries. Also there's a bunch of Tesseract lore and Loki's history with Thanos that I really got carried away with while writing this.

18+ Only - Minors DNI

⊱ ─ ༓ ── ⋅•⋅⊰ ─  ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ∙ ⋅  ─ ⊱⋅•⋅ ── ༓ ─ ⊰

The silence in the cell was electrifyingly tense, and Loki wished he had something else to focus his attention on. 

His jaw ached as he took another bite of the flavorless, perplexing bread that was both stale and damp at the same time. He should have been grateful for it and its distraction, despite the woman having offered it without even so much as looking at him. But it just reminded him of the year he’d spent with the Mad Titan: Wretched. Forsaken. Totally and completely hopeless. 

Loki tried desperately not to think about it, but it was getting harder to fight as his exhaustion grew. 

The woman sat across from him in the cell, her knees pulled to her chest and her expression blank. She’d said absolutely nothing after dismissing his question about Anathema the night prior, not even when the peculiar guards brought in their cruel attempt at a meal. She didn’t even flinch when they set the tray down in front of her, nor when the duo stared, cold and unmoving, presumably waiting for her to beg for her life like all the others…but she did wait until they were finally gone to pull the tray closer. 

She had grabbed the chunk of bread first, and extended it towards him in the shadows like it was second-nature to her. As if it wasn’t ever an option that she wouldn’t share it, and despite the fact that they were in stark disagreement about their respective situations in this place. 

He felt guilty for accepting the offering, but unfortunately, he felt like he had no other choice; his eyelids were growing heavier by the minute, his muscles were becoming weaker with each new day of disuse, and his nerves were perpetually fried with wary energy. He was constantly stifling another yawn, and was dangerously close to falling asleep, to having another nightmare again. 

Loki didn’t know if he ever talked in his sleep, but he didn’t want to risk revealing any compromising information about himself or his past; the less anyone knew about him here, the better off they all were. 

But other than the food she’d shared with him, there wasn’t much else for him to distract himself with. The woman wasn’t talking anymore, and her questions had faded away alongside the hope she may have once had about escaping. That left Loki to alone deal with his questions about her, and their inscrutable answers. 

The problem with that, however, was that his mind was nothing but a tangled mess; a rat’s nest, made up of lies and false memories, the betrayals of the life he’d left behind, and all the lives that never were. Before him lay a scattering of dots, all seemingly unrelated and centered around a woman who claimed she didn’t know what they wanted with her, and he couldn’t seem to make heads or tails of any of it.

Loki used to pride himself on his ability to see the bigger picture, especially on a galactic scale. But he had come here to hide and to wallow, to purposely let his mind atrophy into a cobweb of nothingness, because that was easier than continue trying, and failing, to be happy. He felt comfortable doing that, and letting this become his legacy, because he hadn’t ever expected a riddle to fall into his lap again. He hadn’t ever expected her. 

As Loki swallowed the last of the bread, he forced himself to look at her again. She was still huddled against the wall, illuminated by the dim lantern light from the hallway and shivering in the cold dungeon like a scared little child. He was flabbergasted that she was still here, that they’d bothered bringing her back after being caught during an escape attempt. And he couldn’t help but hate himself, because the old Loki could have figured out why that was a very long time ago. 

Next to her, the bowl of porridge sat on the floor, mostly untouched and definitely not enjoyed. Her expression was sullen as she stared off into the distance, and her limbs were folded around herself as she retreated deeper inward. It almost made him feel…something. 

Of what exactly, Loki wasn’t quite sure; the feeling was old and familiar, something that was long lost while never really being understood in the first place. He told himself that the feeling was irrelevant, because it was just the mystery he found equal parts infuriating and intriguing. He just needed a bit more time than usual to settle the question marks, and then he could finally return to the blissful void of apathy. 

And maybe she wasn’t lying when she claimed to not know who Anathema was, but he didn’t believe for a moment that she had no idea why the guards were so interested in her. Either she had something of theirs, or she knew some mysterious piece of information they didn’t yet - but they were obviously willing to play the long game in order to acquire it, and that couldn’t have been for nothing. 

Perhaps it had something to do with the gem dangling from her necklace. Loki had seen her touching it, frequently and absentmindedly, running her slender fingers over the deep blue stone during stressed and quiet moments like now. Clearly it meant a lot to her; someone who loved her had given it to her. Someone she loved back, someone she probably missed dearly…

As he started to wonder if anyone was out there looking for her, Loki realized he was staring and quickly averted his eyes. They landed once again upon the bowl of uneaten porridge next to her, and a new form of discomfort wove itself between the muscles of his shoulders and neck. It wrapped around his nerve-endings, stinging the open and frayed tendrils that had been worn bare from the pain of still being alive. 

He was quite vulnerable existing like this, even though he knew she couldn’t see him hiding in the shadows. That she didn’t know what he was thinking, or where he was looking. That she was unaware of the fleeting relief that poured into his veins when she was brought back to the cell alive, or his shame at feeling anything that had immediately replaced it. 

Loki had been flippant when she was initially brought in here. He was angry the first time she tried to share a meal with him. And then he was conflicted, at best, when she was dragged back in the second time. This paltry range of emotions was far more than he was previously used to; he felt like he was drowning in it, like it was slowly collapsing his airways and squeezing out every last ounce of oxygen from his lungs. 

Because there was only one person on this planet who knew his name. A single individual, throughout all of space and time, knew where he was. She was the sole witness to his current existence, and he’d never felt more uncomfortable or on display than here and now. She had met him at his worst, in his ultimate moment of triumph when he’d finally been able to remove himself from any and all equations, from every problem that ever needed solving, and he absolutely hated that. 

Loki thought he’d finally accounted for everything when he had stepped through the Time Door and into this dungeon. He thought he’d finally fixed the issue, himself, for literally everyone - and then this tiny little variable had shown up so unexpectedly to completely ruin it for him. 

He should have been angrier about it. He should have been furious and seething and shaking with rage over this egregious betrayal of the universe. Being alone had been the whole point, keeping everyone safe from him had been his only intention, seeking protection from the pain of both betrayal and being betrayed was all that Loki had left. Why wasn’t he allowed that meager peace of mind? 

Damnation clung to Loki like a frightened child clung to his mother’s skirts, trembling in the dark and begging for acknowledgement of its traumatized state. It lurked around every corner and it haunted every shadow, constantly weeping and whimpering and howling out its anguish to cruel and uncaring souls. It was always there, lingering in the corner of his eye, reminding him of just how helpless and useless he was. That he should just give up. That he should just end it already. 

But sometimes, the damnation would transform into something far more sinister, into the tall, skulking form of a cerulean demon. Hanging over his shoulder and digging its claws into his neck, the demon would spit cruel maledictions into his ear. Didn’t Loki know that everyone around him was already doomed? Wouldn’t it be kinder to just kill them now, rather than waiting for him to ruin their life and then cruelly and inevitably take it from them?  

Hiding in the dungeon was the only reasonable compromise between the frightened child and the viscous demon warring in his mind. If only he had stuck with that plan, if only he hadn’t revealed that someone else was alive in the cell with her, then maybe he wouldn’t be in this mess right now. 

Regret, his oldest and only friend, wouldn’t be blaring its horn and sounding the alarm bells and crying out for solace. So why did it bother him so much now that she wasn’t eating? 

Loki shifted uncomfortably on the stone floor, weighing the options in his mind. The regret of initially engaging with this woman didn’t mean he couldn’t change tactics; and if she wasn’t eating, then it wouldn’t be too much longer until he was on his own again. That had been his initial plan, and there was no reason he couldn’t return to that now. Wasn’t being alone all he ever wanted? 

“You should finish your meal. There’s no telling how long it’ll be before they bring another…” The words felt like acid on Loki’s tongue, dripping down his throat to eat away at his insides. He hoped they had come out as bluntly as he’d intended, but in reality, it just sounded like something his mother would have said. 

This time, the woman didn’t shudder when he finally broke the tense silence. She didn’t even react at all, other than to sigh heavily and respond in a low and flattened tone. “What’s the point…?” 

“Well, clearly they’d prefer you to be alive, for whatever reason…” Loki’s jaw tensed as he paused, struggling to understand why he was even bothering. “Even if they bring food on an irregular basis, it’s still more than anyone else gets…”

“Maybe the only reason they want me alive is so they can continue mocking and hurting me.”

That was a more difficult point to contend with; perhaps the guards had just grown weary of the simple and mundane murders, and they’d decided to go with something more entertaining this time. What if there wasn’t a more complicated explanation for the guards' motivations? What if he was searching for logic that didn’t even exist?

Loki stifled another yawn as he leaned back against the stone wall, raking his fingers through tangled curls that were just as chaotic as his thoughts. There had to be something he was missing while attempting to put this puzzle together. “So what did the guards say when they caught you escaping?”  

The woman let out a heavy exhale, and her tone shifted into a more sarcastic tone. “Oh, normal things like what are you doing out of your cell?, and no one’s coming to rescue you. Typical kidnapper things, you know…” 

Loki couldn’t help but roll his eyes at her nonchalant answers, but what else was he expecting? He was beginning to wonder if it was even worth putting this much effort into avoiding sleep. Nothing else in his life prior to meeting her had been easy, so why was he expecting this to go smoothly? 

“Actually, the guard did say something strange before knocking me out…” The woman trailed off, pausing as she furrowed her brow. 

Loki cleared his throat as he looked towards her again. “Strange how?” 

“Maxine - or Nulan, whichever one it was…They caught me upstairs in their private quarters. Just before attacking me, they said what is gone…may never return.” The woman pulled her lower lip between her teeth as she recalled the memory. “I’ve never heard it before, and I have no idea what it means…”

What is gone…may never return. Loki turned the phrase backward and forward in his mind, trying to find its place in this absolutely confounding puzzle. But he’d never heard anyone say anything even remotely close to it, so there was nowhere for it to go. The phrase’s sentiment, however, he understood perfectly well.

“It was probably just a threat, or a taunt…” she continued with a dismissive shake of her head. “They were just mocking me, for losing everything…”

“Or it’s a prayer. A desperate request, for some kind of reprieve…” Loki murmured in reply. He didn’t want to think about whether anyone had ever hoped for the same thing after he’d finally walked away, but he was positive that they had. And he hadn’t meant for his interpretation to sound so melancholy, but as his gaze caught the woman’s matching expression, he could feel her understanding of his meaning. Loki hated that. 

She must have sensed that as well, because she quickly forced a false smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “No…surely they must have been talking about me losing my boots.”

Her smile faded just as quickly as it had appeared, shifting into a grimace as a violent shiver shuddered over the limbs she struggled to pull close enough. She breathed out a heavy sigh and lowered her forehead to her knees with another tremble, and for once, Loki was grateful for the Jotun physiology keeping him relatively comfortable. But the woman didn’t share the same luxury of such a curse, and she was clearly suffering in these dank and grim conditions. 

Loki turned his attention towards his fingers, twitching and fidgeting restlessly in his lap. This particular guilt was both new and unwelcome, like the haunting of fresh ghosts he thought he’d finally manage to not brutally murder for once. It wasn’t directly his fault she was here, that she was suffering. She was a complete stranger, after all, and this couldn’t have been his problem, or his responsibility. 

But as Loki lifted his gaze again, carefully moving his eyes to avoid looking upon her once more, he caught a glimpse of the woman’s forgotten boots in the shadows, the ones carelessly stripped away while the guards were searching her the night before. 

He recalled one of the first lessons Odin had explained about ruling a kingdom, that sometimes tact and finesse were far more effective than blades or might. Perhaps if Loki was kind instead of harsh, and if he returned the boots to the frozen woman, then she might help alleviate the nagging questions he still had and allow him to fight off sleep for just a little bit longer. 

His brow furrowed, and he swallowed hard as he realized this was the least he could do for the both of them. It wasn’t much, but it felt like chopping off a limb when he cleared his throat and forced himself to speak again. “Your, um…boots are in here. They might help you with the…cold.”

The woman’s head popped back up, and her eyes narrowed as she scanned for them in the darkness. “Where are they? I don’t - ” she replied, clumsily attempting to push herself upright, obviously eager to get them back on as soon as possible. 

Loki felt an odd sense of duty, one that had been buried deep underneath the many eons of pain, and it compelled him to act before he had the chance to second-guess himself. He moved slowly, shifting his weight onto his hip, and extended his arm out. His fingers were just long enough to barely grasp the black leather pull loops, to drag them closer and then place them within her reach while maintaining a safe distance, and without the need for him to stand.

A faint smile crossed her lips as she stretched to pull them closer. “Thank you so much, Loki.” 

He couldn’t bring himself to make eye contact anymore; it was hard enough to listen to the bewildered gratitude in her voice. His every movement had stayed within the safe confines of the shadows, and he imagined that she saw her boots reappearing as if from the loving aid of a benevolent god, of someone else who was capable of caring. 

“It was nothing,” he told them both. 

He had fully intended to return his attention back inward, but he found himself distracted by the woman as she shifted on the floor. Curling and stretching her limbs, gracelessly attempting to pull a boot back on with a single hand, and then reluctantly, with both hands. She let out a gasping whimper as she tried to extend out her left arm, and Loki noticed her fingers trembling as she tried to push through the pain. 

Obligation flared along his spine again, but this time, Loki questioned it. A childhood memory surfaced, of when his father would return home from war, bruised and exhausted and weary, and Loki would rush to his side, eager to help with removing his armor and assist in any way he could. He thought maybe if he proved himself useful, eager and determined, like his older brother was, then Odin might finally give him a chance to fight alongside him. 

But even though his seidr had been well-advanced for his age, his father had always refused to bring Loki along, despite never leaving home without Thor. Odin had said that Loki wasn’t ready yet, that he wasn’t strong enough, that it was too dangerous for a little boy to be out on the field and surrounded by their mortal enemies. 

“Such a young prince falling into the hands of Asgard’s opponents could prove disastrous to the realms,” his father had said, even though that fear had never stopped him from bringing Thor into battle. It wasn’t until much later that Loki realized the truth, that the only real use he had wasn’t needed back then - not until the direst of circumstances forced his father’s ultimate and final hand. 

The woman let out a sharp groan, bringing Loki back to the present. She had collapsed back against the wall, sniffling and brushing the messy strands of crimson hair away from her face. “Loki, I’m so sorry…but can you please…?” 

His eyes widened, and hers were full of tears. Her cheeks reddened, and her lower lip trembled as she spoke with a cracked voice. “Please help me? I’m so cold, and I can’t…I can’t get these back on…” 

It wasn’t like the cold, calculating demands he was previously used to, and Loki realized that it pained her to ask like this. She wasn’t trying to get anything out of him, she wasn’t manipulating her way into something more than she deserved, or trying to get him to commit atrocities in her name. 

It wasn’t a game or a trick designed to be laughed at later with her friends; she genuinely just needed his help. But the problem was that this kind of assistance not only required him to vacate the shadows, to come closer and share the same air as her - it necessitated physical touch. Loki was sure he couldn’t handle that. 

The muscles in his fingers articulated of their own accord, separating and curling into just the right place to summon and concentrate his seidr, intent on disassembling the atoms that made up the woman’s boots and reassembling them back where they belonged. 

A suitable compromise, Loki believed, except that absolutely nothing happened. The warmth that normally accompanied his magic was nowhere to be found, that familiar connection to the past and the present, to his mother, wasn’t opening its loving arms to welcome him back home - and that was when he finally remembered. 

Loki’s seidr was dead, because he was supposed to be dead. 

He’d forsaken his magic as soon as he’d arrived here. Once he willingly stepped through the Time Door and into this dungeon, once he’d realized that the first thing this newly-freed universe had done was trap him yet again, he decided that this time it was really meant to be. 

So he didn’t bother fighting it, and he willingly let go of the tendrils of seidr he had once clung so tightly to. He didn’t deserve the honor of wielding it, not after what he’d done in New York. And what use would that magic have been to the hollowed-out shell of a person he was now? What good could he have possibly done with it anyway?

“Loki?”

Once again, the woman’s quiet voice refocused his attention. Her expression had fallen even further during his silent brooding, and she was staring woefully into the dark, desperately hoping to see him finally coming to her aid. A deep sense of dread rose up within his chest, thick and impenetrable, oozing between his ribs to singe and suffocate his lungs like molten lava. 

Loki didn’t know what to do, and yet, he moved anyway. Pressing his palms flat against the stone floor, he bent his knees and carefully pushed himself upright. His joints cracked and popped, his muscles were stiff and sluggish as he slid one foot forward, and the belt around his waist was far looser than when he’d initially put it on. 

Taking another step closer, his mind suddenly dizzied, and his body began to sway dangerously from the juxtaposition of pushing himself forward while he’d been wasting away. He quickly grabbed onto the wall with a sharp gasp, trying to steady himself as his legs tingled themselves awake. 

“Loki…are you alright?” the woman murmured, her brow furrowing with concern. 

“I’m fine, it’s just - ” Loki sighed heavily, his heart pounding and muscles trembling. “I’m just not used to…standing.” 

Loki closed his eyes and leaned against the wall for a moment, willing his body back into operating under his own control. But despite his best efforts, weariness and exhaustion were still permanently at the helm, relentlessly steering him back towards collapsing and passing out again. 

“It’s alright. Take your time…”

Loki’s eyes snapped back open, painfully aware that she was still watching him closely, and he did everything he could to both avoid her gaze and her reassurance. Nothing about this was alright, and he could hear his father’s chastising voice from beyond the stars, criticizing him for allowing enervation to consume him - even though that was the only way to keep himself out of trouble. 

His eyes flitted across the dungeon cell, feverishly taking in the stone walls and steel bars of the door, then out to the flickering lantern light of the hallway. Loki had never even bothered to take a good look at his coffin before committing to staying in it for all eternity, but from this elevation, he could clearly examine the cuts that made up the large slabs of the walls and floor. Meticulous, flawless, precise - too perfect to have been sliced by hand. 

His gaze moved to the cream-colored candlestick suspended within the single lantern in the hallway, evenly melted away and without a single speck of soot upon the glass encasing it. From there, he could make out the grooves carved by the steel bars into the doorway’s arch as it swung open and closed, and the streaked and dark stains, smudged against the grayed and leadened floor, leading from the hallway back into their cell. 

The woman’s blood, he assumed, and Loki’s hands clenched into fists. His throat tightened, and the slightest hint of outrage began to reluctantly wake from its slumber. 

Forcing the feeling away, Loki finally closed the distance and carefully crouched in front of the woman; only then did he let her be the focus of his attention. Loose and uneven strands of crimson had been pulled free from the long, disheveled braid nestled untidily over her shoulder;her skin was wan and pallid, and her lips were tinted with the faintest hint of blue. 

Dried blood had smeared on her ear, her neck, the lengths of her hair and along her cheek. It was everywhere, mixed with the dirt and muck from the floor, coating the corners of her cracked lips and the freckles that dotted her cheekbone. The fact that the blood was dried, meaning the original wound was at the very least no longer actively bleeding, did nothing to make him feel better. 

Loki lowered one knee down to the floor, precariously settling his weight onto one ankle, and the woman’s attention was now entirely fixed on her boots. She swallowed nervously, and Loki silently agreed with the sentiment. How long had it been since he’d touched another person? Did he even remember how to be gentle? How to not contaminate? 

Moving cautiously, he took a boot into his grasp, threading his fingers between the loops and slowly pulling to loosen its laces. While he worked, he focused on the soft leather: its scent was herbal, earthy, and with just the barest suggestion of sweetness. Intricate designs, swirls and constellations and rays of light emanating from an overly-stylized sun were stitched into the leather, extending from the collar and flowing down way past the ankle. 

Soft, pliable and shiny, the leather still showed signs of its latest polish, applied with a healthy dose of high-quality wax, from underneath the layers of grim. The boots had been methodically cared for, regularly and recently, and probably not too long before the woman found herself in custody of the mysterious guards. Loki found himself curious about the circumstances of her capture. 

Stained in the same shade of night as the leathers covering her legs, they blended seamlessly together with the rest of her clothing, from the thin stockings on her feet to the chipped lacquer on her fingernails. Everything was the exact same color, save for the thin, flowing emerald tunic that had long since come untucked, and the gem that hung from her neck. 

And everything she wore was undoubtedly expensive, most likely customized for this particular owner, and she had obviously not dressed for being locked inside a damp and grimy dungeon. At best, she was prepared for a pleasant walk through the woods on a mildly chilly evening; Loki tried not to think about it too much. 

Out of his peripheral vision, Loki could see the woman stealing glances up at him. She watched him carefully, her sea green eyes shifting cautiously between his face, his hands, and the boot he was unlacing - obviously examining and judging the hideous monster whose help she had no choice but to accept. 

Loki began to feel self-conscious. There was no doubt that his own appearance wasn’t any better than her own at the moment; in fact, he was sure it was much, much worse. Dark and unkempt curls hung way past his shoulders like sinister snakes. The skin on his hands was sullen and pallor, shifting dangerously close to bluish gray, and he had no idea if his eyes had begun to drift back into their original shade of ruby-red or not. He promised himself that this would be the only time she ever saw his face up close. 

When he could no longer justify stalling with the laces, he cleared his throat, and forced his fingers to tap the underside of her leg; a featherlight touch that could have been easily missed if one hadn’t been expecting it. But the woman again mercifully sensed his meaning, and she positioned the appropriate foot for him to slide the boot on. 

Too well, Loki noticed, as he pulled the collar up to settle around her calf; she was exceptionally practiced at having others put footwear on her - at tensing the right muscles at just the right moment, and extending the leg with just enough force to seat the foot comfortably against the insole. 

“Sorry about this…” she mumbled as Loki pulled the laces tight and began looping them back and forth around the hooks. “Although, this is probably the most exciting thing you’ve done in a while, huh?” 

She was trying to lighten the mood, to distract from the previous awkwardness of such close quarters. Loki’s response was flat and measured, his attention focused on tying instead of talking. “Like I said - it’s nothing.” 

A nervous silence followed, one that was far more uncomfortable than the awkwardness. Loki hadn’t meant to be so dismissive, and perhaps he’d been far too frigid for someone who was supposed to be helping her. When he finished the final loop, he cleared his throat again and forced himself to look up again. 

“Is that…too tight for you?” he murmured softly. 

The woman managed a weak smile as she flexed her ankle. “No. It feels fine.” 

Loki noted that her pupils dilated ever so slightly when she met his gaze, and he took that as a good sign that her head injury wasn’t a completely serious one. He wasn’t sure why he was noting that, but nonetheless, he had, and he didn’t have the energy to start questioning it. Instead, he busied himself with picking up the other boot and threading his fingers underneath its laces like he’d done with the first. 

“Is this all I have left? Just waiting in this cell to die?” 

Her voice had taken on a somber, more sorrowful tone now; apparently open anguish was much easier for her than polite small-talk, and if she hadn’t been so exhausted, Loki would have guessed there would have been more than a tear or two accompanying her questions. He wasn’t sure how to answer her; bringing up the fact that the other prisoners before her had never lasted more than a day or two, or the fact that they were never returned once removed from their cells, probably wasn’t going to help her mood very much. 

“At least they’re leaving you alone for the most part,” Loki answered, lightly tapping his fingers underneath her other leg for the placement of its boot. “Be thankful for relative peace.” 

The woman sighed heavily as she cooperated. “Relative peace. That’s all I have to look forward to?” 

“For some, that’s all they’ve ever wanted,” Loki said absentmindedly. “They’d kill for it, and others willingly die in its pursuit…”

The woman’s eyebrows raised in troubled concern, and Loki tried to ignore it. He couldn’t understand why he was like this, either speaking too familiarly with the woman, or far too flippantly. He was out of practice when it came to any sort of normal conversation, but he didn’t want to be accustomed to it again. In the end, she was just a temporary distraction, and he wasn’t supposed to even exist at all. 

“That’s very enlightened, coming from someone who has nightmares every time he closes his eyes…” the woman replied as he finished tying the laces on the other boot. She flexed that ankle, and then nodded her approval while pulling her knees back against her chest. 

Loki’s brow furrowed as he met her gaze once more. Her eyes were wide and open, appearing to be without a single shred of judgment, only empathy. Loki couldn’t help but scrutinize her for that. If she only knew how little he deserved kindness, and he was irritated that she’d noticed how bad his nightmares were at all. He’d rather have not known that his weakness was on complete display, and thus, beyond his complete control. 

Slowly pushing himself back up to standing, grateful that the task and its requisite close proximity were finally over, Loki’s fingertips trailed along the cold stone as he backed into the shadows again. But lethargy was creeping back in, along with the ever-present unsettled and restless energy, and when Loki returned to sitting, he wasn’t quite as far into the dark as he had been before. 

“You know, it may help your nightmares to talk about them,” the woman suggested cautiously. “Perhaps unburdening yourself a little would be a good thing…” 

Loki grimaced. Of all the ways she could have worded it, he wished it hadn’t been in that specific way. As it were, various burdens of all sorts were already going to haunt him until the end of time, it seemed, and he preferred not to be reminded of the purposes initially set upon him by Thanos. And even if he wanted to, where should he begin? 

He still didn’t quite understand what exactly had happened to him on Knowhere; that entire year was just a chaotic haze of torture and manipulation, through both physical and psychological means, and it was impossible for him to decipher what was real and what was a lie. Even now, he couldn’t even recall the exact circumstances that led to his descent from the Bifrost and into Thanos’ control. 

Sometimes, he could clearly remember the decision to let go of Gungnir and fall into the abyss; other times, he was absolutely convinced that his brother had pushed him in a jealous rage, furious that Loki’s short tenure as King had proved far more successful than any longer one Thor could have ever managed. 

Either way, the fall had resulted in him becoming Thanos’ prisoner, and then later, as a member of the Black Order - but only after they’d finally conceded that physical torture was never going to work on the body of a Frost Giant, on an Asgardian prince raised as a warrior, or on a powerful sorcerer who already had extremely complicated feelings about being alive in the first place. 

But once they realized that he just wanted somewhere to belong, they finally started to see real progress, and the emotional manipulation that followed was probably more effective than they could have ever hoped for. It was so very easy to muddy the rough waters of Loki’s psyche thanks to the Chitauri Scepter and his tremendous heartbreak - a kind word here, a clever lie there, and nothing but speeches about revenge and betrayals, destinies and purposes, salvation and redemption, and scorned Kings and their disgraced sons. 

After Loki had been welcomed into the fold, Thanos explained his need for the Tesseract; if Loki acquired it, then he would be granted an army to help take Midgard by as excessive and violent force as he deemed necessary. The God of Mischief already knew that he wanted to be as destructive as possible - to both completely cripple his brother’s fondness for the pathetic humans, and to show Odin that he would settle for being a terrifying leader if he wasn’t permitted to be a good one. 

His idea for retrieving the Tesseract had been a clever one; so clever that Loki wasn’t surprised that Thanos or the Black Order hadn’t ever considered it before. But getting to suggest it meant that his new Master was immediately pleased with his usefulness, something that had rarely happened with his previous keeper, and Loki was so grateful for the opportunity to satisfy. 

Out of the six Infinity Stones, the Space Stone was unique in that it could generate massive amounts of self-sustaining energy. Its power signature was incredibly easy to track, and it didn’t take long for Loki to determine the Tesseract’s location inside the S.H.I.E.L.D. research facility. Under Fury’s careful and watchful eye, the mortals were studying its capabilities for power production, no doubt to be used in some kind of advanced weapons manufacture instead of something that could actually be used to help mankind. 

A stereotypically short-sighted action, one that would soon be their downfall, because none of those weapons would ever be able to stop him from completing his task. Had they realized the stone’s true potential, as Loki had, then perhaps the humans might have fared better during his invasion.

Because he knew something that apparently no one else did, something he now prayed that no one else would ever be able to figure out. Loki was in the unusual position of understanding exactly how the Bifrost had operated, of how it could easily send and receive anything from across the galaxies with frightening and pinpoint accuracy. As a child, he was fascinated by the Bifrost, and more than once Heimdall had to stop him from attempting to disassemble it while searching for the details of its inner workings. 

Once informed of her son’s unyielding curiosities, his mother had patiently redirected that energy towards Asgard’s massive libraries. There, he spent many late nights pouring over the texts and histories of the magnificent Bifrost. Once he’d devoured all he could from words, he then spent his time exploring the Realm and looking for means of travel that didn’t involve going to the Bifrost at all. 

And thanks to the Mad Titan’s relentless and universal conquest in search of the stones, Loki had access to incalculable amounts of lore, research and history that had been stolen from countless cultures and societies. He spent months buried in books and manuscripts, performing calculations and practicing his seidr, searching desperately for the perfect combination of science and magic to get him what he needed. 

All of that, when combined with his extensive knowledge of the Bifrost, allowed Loki to realize that all he needed was a power-source. It must have been fate and its impeccable sense of humor, because the Space Stone could be the engine, and the Tesseract was going to be the gateway - a terrible, incredible bridge between where you were, and where you desperately wanted to be. 

For Loki, the Tesseract was going to deliver him to vengeance, respect, authority and glory - in a way that no one would be able to undo once he finally got it. His brother, his father, the entire Nine Realms and beyond, all of them would be powerless to stop him once he figured out how to open the Tesseract’s portal from the other side. 

Returning to his research with a new sense of delirium, he gave up on sleep, and food, and his sanity while he searched for the answer. His cheeks became hollow, his eyes were sunken deep into his skull, and his skin grew weak and frail. His nerves were on the verge of total disintegration, his heart ached and his mind was hazy. 

His every waking thought was consumed by the Tesseract, and on the rare occasion that he actually passed out, so were his nightmares. He became too lost to even carry on a conversation; all he could manage were grunts and groans and strange approximations of the word “Tesseract”. Every part of himself, anything that had once been Loki, had all but slipped away. 

But occasionally, Loki would come back to himself. He would look down at his hands in horror, and he wouldn’t understand where he was or how he got there. While screaming and lashing out, the one called Ebony Maw would preach about balance, about salvation and judgment and how Loki was destined to assist the Great Titan in saving all of life, by ending half of it. He was instructed to be grateful for being allowed to take part in it.

But it didn’t make any sense, and Loki tried so hard to resist, to fight them off, to scramble to the exit and free himself, to warn someone of the terrible thing that was coming. Then, something would happen, something would touch him, and his mind would cloud back over with rage and madness. The dangerous craving for the Tesseract would return tenfold, and then he would be back on task, more eager than ever to please. 

After a quick journey through the minds of the men known as Selvig and Barton, Loki finally had everything he needed to complete his sacred mission. The astrophysicist filled in the last remaining gaps about the Tesseract’s functionalities, and the archer revealed information about S.H.I.E.L.D.'s security protocols - how many personnel were on site, what types of weapons they had, where they’d been trained. The details of every file stored on their secret servers, every individual’s personal histories - including that of the beings once considered to join the so-called Avengers, the ones that might be called upon to stop him. 

On his first attempt, Loki succeeded in opening the Tesseract’s portal. One moment, he was standing on Thanos’ ship, and the next, he was inside the research facility, shrouded within a haze of smoke and mania. By the third second, he was ferociously attacking, moving and acting without consideration for the stealth or secrecy he’d been trained with as a child. He didn’t even bother dodging the humans’ pathetic projectiles; instead, he focused on murdering the ones he had already deemed useless to his cause, and using the Sceptre to convert the ones that were worthy of it

Nor did he bother mincing words with Fury as the Director stalled for time, not even the ones ripped directly from Ebony Maw’s impassioned and self-important speeches. Loki already knew how unstable the gateway was, and that was by design. During his maniacal studies, he had determined how best to sustain the portal’s opening for safe and easy passage - first, in order to allow entry for the Chitauri forces, and then to facilitate easy travel for Thanos to find the rest of the stones later on. 

Loki’s first act of murder had been intentionally not stabilizing the portal as it opened inside the S.H.I.E.L.D. facility; he had wanted the structure to collapse in a stunning display of destruction. Whether it was to be an ominous warning for what he was about to do, or if it was to serve as a call to action for the only ones who could have prevented him from succeeding, he still wasn’t quite sure. 

Either way, he ultimately failed in the only way that had mattered. Loki didn’t achieve vengeance or respect or authority, and there was no victory or glory waiting for him after it was over. The Chitauri Forces were destroyed, the Tesseract was not handed over to Thanos per their agreement, and he’d made a great many vicious and unforgiving enemies that day. 

In the end, the only thing waiting for him was a prison cell on Asgard, and all he’d managed to do was to make everything worse. 

And presumably, after it was over, Thanos still had access to all of Loki’s research. Losing out on the Tesseract would have infuriated him and the Black Order; a minor inconvenience, sure, but it wouldn’t have hindered their quest in the slightest. Thanos still knew how to use the Tesseract because of him - and more importantly, he understood how to use it in the most destructive way possible. That was completely and entirely Loki’s fault, and he just hoped that Thanos was arrogant enough to keep that information to himself, that no one else would try and fail in the same catastrophic way that Loki had. 

Maybe the Tesseract wasn’t meant to be used as a gateway, and in doing so, Loki had ensured that he’d never get what he wanted, and that he’d lose what little he had left. All of that madness and frantic chaos and deliberate carnage had been for absolutely nothing. Maybe the Tesseract was cursed, and maybe, so was he. 

Because every single time Loki had come into contact with it, his life had taken a drastic and even more devastating turn for the worse. Attempting to acquire it for Thanos had broken him - mind, body, and soul; fleeing New York with it had landed him in the clutches of the TVA; and apparently, it had been his ultimate destiny to die while trying to keep it from the Mad Titan. 

The absolute last thing Loki ever wanted was to be reminded of the Tesseract - more than he wanted silence, or solitude, or to rot. And now this woman wanted to know what his nightmares were about? 

Even if he had made it to the prison cell on Asgard, he wasn’t planning to explain himself to anyone. What was he supposed to tell his brother, his mother, his father? That he’d been deceived? Were they going to believe that he’d fallen for someone else’s lies so easily, and without question? That the God of Mischief himself had been tricked, played for a fool and made to be the universe’s largest and most pathetic scapegoat?

No, trying to justify his actions would be a grave disservice to the innocent lives he’d taken, and telling the truth was next to impossible. Even just talking about the betrayal of his family would be too much for him to bear, and that was the only aspect of the entire thing that Loki had never, ever second-guessed. 

The woman continued stealing glances in his direction, from just a few feet away now. Still waiting for him to say something, anything, to help keep her mind distracted from her own plights. For the briefest of moments, he actually considered asking if she’d ever heard of the Tesseract, or the Infinity Stones. If she knew who Thanos was, if he’d ever been to this planet before…but as Loki fidgeted with his tie, running his fingers over the frayed and broken seams in the cloth, he knew the answer didn’t matter. 

The appropriate time to have asked that question would have been when he’d first arrived, back when the TemPad still had the power to take him some place else if need be. But now the TemPad was dead; he was trapped here, and the longer he could go without hearing about the Tesseract, the better. The longer he could go on in the blissful ignorance of relative peace, and without talking about himself, the easier this would be for everyone. 

“How did you wind up here anyway?” He winced as he spoke, hating himself for being more than a little curious about it. “I can’t imagine the guards asking you to come along nicely…”

The woman hesitated for a moment, no doubt replaying the events in her mind and wishing she had done something differently. Her fingers grasped the gem that hung from her neck, and she swallowed hard. “I was…taken from Tessaway, my home, in the middle of the night.” 

She paused, her eyes focused on something non-existent in the distance. “I don’t know how they made it past the sentries, but they…managed, somehow. They took me from my bed, while I slept…” 

Loki shook his head, trying to appear sympathetic. “You lived in a heavily guarded city. It must be a very dangerous place…”

“Tessaway isn’t a city,” she corrected, furrowing her brow as she looked over at him. “It’s the castle in Fayrest. You know, the capital city…?” 

He didn’t know any of that, of course, having never left this cell. The woman looked like she wanted to say more but was afraid to, and he couldn’t help but think about why she had seemed to imply before that no one was going to rescue her. “Wouldn’t someone from the castle have noticed your absence? Surely they have to be looking for you by now…” 

“No…” The woman shifted uncomfortably in place, her expression broken and forlorn. “No, I was just a servant. No one important enough to miss…” 

Loki had been studying her carefully ever since he’d realized her captors were going to keep her alive for much longer than they had the others. Her movements were elegant and refined, her clothing and jewelry expensive and customized, her speech graceful and enchanting; the kind of charming that could only come from years of practice. He didn’t believe for a second that she was just a servant working in a castle. 

But she was also clearly in a tremendous amount of pain, and for whatever reason, was keeping the origins of her birth a secret. Loki wondered what might have happened to him if he had been given that luxury, if he hadn’t been the only one to not know the truth about himself. 

“Ah, a servant,” he replied, trying to lighten the mood a little. His unpracticed lips curved into a forced and lazy grin. “That certainly explains why you’re so concerned about my well-being…” 

The woman’s eyebrows raised in amusement, and she tilted her head curiously as if taking his comment as a challenge. “What’s the matter? Are you not used to someone worrying about your well-being?” 

Loki’s jaw tensed; perhaps he hadn’t been behaving as opaquely as he hoped, and he hated that she could see through him just as well as he could through her. He glanced over, and decided to provoke her right back. “Well, I’m sure they’ll miss you at the castle eventually. Like when there’s pots that need washing, or linens that need changing?” 

“Yes, yes, that’s very funny…” she replied, rolling her eyes. “I get it, the thing about servants is that no one knows your name until something you normally do suddenly isn’t being done anymore…” 

The woman turned, and she met his gaze with a considering and dissecting one of her own. “Like you - you don’t need anything from me, so why would you ever bother learning my name?” 

From just a few feet away, the woman stared deep into his soul, tugging at the strings that still held him upright and all but questioning if they were even necessary. He waited until she looked away to furrow his brow again, because while she was right about him not needing anything from her, she was surely mistaken about the other half of her point.

Because he did actually know her name; it was the first new name he’d learned in such a very long time, and he thought it suited her quite well, all things considered. But he had been trying to avoid acknowledging it, not wanting it to mean something more than what it was. 

It was just a name, after all; a series of specific vocalizations designed to get her attention. Saying it out loud didn’t mean that they were friends, or that they were even important to each other. It wouldn’t bind them in any way, or obligate him to care. But if that were true, then why did he have such a problem with saying it? 

Loki could feel a nervous energy creeping relentlessly up his spine again. He wished it would stop receding, that it would stay put, because the constant shifting between relaxing and stressing was completely wearing him out. He told himself he just needed to say it out loud and get it over with, before he could start second-guessing and talk himself out of it again - especially now that she had noticed his careful avoidance of her name. 

“What kind of servant knows how to fight with a staff anyway?” Loki asked, affecting an innocent and casual tone. “I guess servants named Oliviette do…” 

After he answered his own question, Loki looked towards her again, and Oliviette was already smiling back at him; it was a bleary and quiet acknowledgement, but the sentiment was definitely noteworthy. For the first time since they’d met, he could see the dimples in her cheeks, and it was impossible to miss the way her eyes lit up with mirth, or how her lips pursed before she finally responded. 

“What? Am I not allowed to have hobbies outside of work?” 

Loki struggled to not return her smile. He almost felt a sense of appreciation for her snark and the much-needed diversion from the constant aching in his chest. It was only then that he remembered that this was supposed to be a temporary distraction; he couldn’t afford to spend needless energy that didn’t directly involve finding out why the guards were keeping Oliviette alive for this long. 

Keeping a safe distance was paramount, his new glorious purpose. Trust was for children and dogs, wasn’t that how he’d put it to Mobius during their first meeting? As long as he stayed here, keeping himself isolated and protected, then he couldn’t ever be tricked into being someone else’s attack dog ever again. He couldn’t ever hurt anyone again. 

Besides, it was highly implausible that her life would end in any way other than tragically. Loki’d already had quite enough of that - and would it be worth getting close to her, even if it didn’t? 

⊱ ─ ༓ ── ⋅•⋅⊰ ─  ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ∙ ⋅  ─ ⊱⋅•⋅ ── ༓ ─ ⊰

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[dejwrld]

˚₊𓆩༺🎸༻𓆪₊˚ — summer of 22', choso kamo

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐈. — WHO THE HELL LISTENS TO CLASSICAL MUSIC?

ᩍ before reading please be advised of the following warnings — female reader, written with black reader in mind, humor/crack, noritoshi & choso are cousins in this cause i said so, profanity, this is quite self indulgent and kinda my own assumption & characterization of modern day choso, mentions of choso having a scar, mentions of character death (reader's mom), record shop boss!geto lol, two idiots that bond over music | mdni, taglist, masterlist, other creations

chapter playlist | are you with that by vince staples, wait a minute by willo, the less i know the better by tame impala

JAPAN WAS VERY DIFFERENT FROM THE STATES. A huge cultural shock compared to your busy lifestyle in New York City. You still could remember your father’s long lecture about being aware of your surroundings, don’t talk to strangers, going with your instincts in some locations, and so much more. You would think you were still that young sixteen-year-old girl who was raised by their single dad after the death of her mother, but you were of age. In the fall you would be a graduating senior at Julliard, living alone in a lovely apartment in New York City, teaching dance classes when you had free time, and doing many adult types of activities. You were a functioning young adult whose father still wanted to shelter you away from the world as if you were a hopeless Rapunzel. 

It took some convincing for your father to let you go to a ballet convention in Japan for the summer, especially if he was going to be funding it. You planned to rent out a room, get as much knowledge as possible at this convention so you could be prepared for your senior year at Julliard, and then return home. Your father didn’t agree with that plan. He only agreed when your godmother Utahime Iori agreed to keep an eye on you. 

Utahime Iori was an international ballet superstar and your late mom’s best friend. They met when they both were competing for the lead in Swan Lake, which was given to your mom. But your mother stepped down from the role when she became pregnant with you. The friendship between the two still blossomed from your mom being in the front row on the opening night to cheer Utahime on to your mom even keying Utahime’s boyfriend's car while six months pregnant with you. Utahime would always admit to you that your mom felt like she was her twin flame. They were insufferable when they were apart and together. Such a close bond and your mom’s death took a toll on Utahime. It hit her like a truck hitting a concrete wall at full speed. It sucked Utahime’s love for ballet right away, but the woman still stuck by your side during the journey of your ballet career.

She held your hand as the people around you threw pity your way during the funeral. She defended your passion for dance to your father as if she was defending an important law case. She did your hair for recitals. She stayed up late helping you come up with your Juilliard audition piece. She played the role of your godmother so well that you knew deep down your mom was smiling down on the both of you. 

You were so excited to spend the summer in Utahime’s home country. You knew she was going to want you to practice for the ballet convention because every summer—a dancer is chosen to dance an original piece in front of many known people. From choreographers, dance tour coordinators, and of course, famous ballet royalty. You didn’t want this spot to be given to you considering who your mother was and the fact that Utahime helped fund the convention in the first place. She told you specifically that you won’t get special privileges, that if it’s a better dancer—they will not think twice about replacing you. That’s just how wicked the world of ballet was. When it came to ballet, you didn’t have time to cry about not getting the lead in a dance when the time you were feeling pity for yourself—you could be using it to make yourself better. Those were the words your former ballet instructor explicitly told you and those were the words you kept in your head up to this day. 

“We need to lay down some ground rules,” Utahime stated as she placed a plate of food in front of you.

“Please don’t tell me, my dad gave you some rules.” You whined.

“No, these are my own rules,” Utahime said. She sat down at the table clearing her throat. “Practice comes first. I don’t care what you’re doing, I text you to come practice…come! This is not like the states, the dancers here sleep, eat, and breathe dance.”

“Okay.” 

“No big distractions. I understand you most likely will want to mingle, you’re my very beautiful goddaughter—but please remember what you’re originally here for.” Utahime adds.

“No Summer flings, gotcha!” 

“Okay, I didn’t say that. Just be mindful of who you are flinging with.” Utahime corrected.

“During your free time, please don’t associate yourself with the wrong crowd,” Utahime adds. “A ballerina with a criminal record isn’t cute no matter how good you look in your mugshot.”

“Don’t get arrested, noted. Any other rules?” You took a bite out of your food.

“Enjoy your summer, but please be mindful of what you’re here for. If you get to dance an original piece, it will look wonderful in your portfolio for when you graduate next Spring and that’s the endgame.” 

“Of course! So, can I go exploring?” You eagerly asked. You gave your godmother those innocent puppy dog eyes that she has seen so many times since you were younger.

“Fine, but please be safe. I will be stopping at the dance studio, so when you’re done exploring—meet me there.” Utahime says.

You pushed yourself out of your seat and would go over to Utahime pulling her into a hug. Mumbling many thank yous and even kissing her cheek. “Thank you! I promise I’ll be at the studio at a reasonable time!” You yelled as you were going to leave. 

You didn’t even let Utahime get a word out before you’re heading out of Utahime’s apartment and essentially you're home for the summer. You walked towards the elevator as you were walking, your face was buried in your phone updating your father on how you were doing. Even though he was most likely sleeping soundly back in New York, you still didn’t want to have him so worried during your three months here. You never understood the protectiveness your father had over you. Although it was a duty for fathers to protect their children as if their life depended on it—your father took it a little too far. Especially after your mother’s death, he once tried to take your love of ballet away from you. Arguing that it was the reason that broke your mom down and he refused to let you follow your mother’s dark path. Whatever that meant. Your mother’s death was a hushed secret that no one wanted to talk about. No one talked about what pushed her to do it, not even Utahime. 

So what exactly did your father mean by ballet being why your mother took a dark path?

When you made it to the street, you opened Google and decided to search if any record shops were nearby. In the guest room, you were staying in, Utahime mentioned it being a record player a close friend gave to her and you were eager to use it during your time here. However, she didn’t have any vinyl records at all. She claimed that her career pushed her away from home quite often, so what was the point of buying vinyl records for a record player that only was collecting dust in her guest bedroom? 

The first record shop that popped up was Suguru Records. You clicked on how far it was and wasn’t much of a walk. You placed your earbuds in your ear and soon Jazmine Sullivan was blasting through your ears. You took in everything around you as you were walking. From the architect of each building to the locals that are out and about. You enjoyed this atmosphere so much better than the busy streets of New York City during the rush hour of going to work or coming home from work. It was a soothing atmosphere and it made you even more excited to spend a summer here. Granted, the stares you were receiving as you were walking to your destination—it wasn’t anything new from the stares you received when you went to different ballet events around the world. 

When you finally got to the record shop, you entered it with a smile. The scent in the store was comforting, homely at most. The first thing you noticed when you entered it was empty. To you, that wasn’t good considering that anyone could come in and take what they wanted and leave. You figured that the familiar bell that would annoyingly ring when the record shop door would push open would cause the employees to hurriedly run to the front of the store. You let your fingers brush against the records as you walk down a random aisle specifically looking for the classical section. You can already imagine how beautiful the tune of a popular classical song humming out the record player while you practice in the living room of Utahime’s place. But as you walk around the record shop, you didn’t even see a section for classical music. However, you did pick up a couple of your favorite R&B albums as you were snooping around.

You heard the familiar bell and your eyes darted to the door and you saw a man with long black hair carrying a box into the shop. He had gauges in his ears and if you were being honest, if you looked closely—he looked familiar. As if you saw him on a magazine cover or something. When his eyes met yours and then scanned over the shop, he let out a sigh before slowly dropping the box he was carrying near the register. “Welcome to Suguru Records, I’ll be right back.” He flashed you a kind smile before disappearing in the back. 

You heard some ruckus in the back and what you assumed was the guy who greeted you voice, “I told you two gremlins to stop leaving the front end unattended!” 

Soon the gentleman returned with two guys. He had a grip on the back of their work uniform shirts as if he was a father pitbull lifting his pups by their fur to help them get around better. One of the guys looked at the long-haired gentleman and gave him a deadpan smile, “It’s a slow day and it looks like the customer doesn't even need help. You said it yourself, if it’s slow—Choso and I can work on our music.” One said.

The man let go of the back of the two guys' shirts and he would push one of them towards you. “Noritoshi, you start unloading that box near the register. Choso, you go help the customer before I fire both of you.” 

Noritoshi was near the register mumbling something under his breath before his boss glanced in his direction. “Do you have anything to say, Noritoshi?” The long-haired gentleman asked. 

Noritoshi shook his head, “Oh no, just asking if you were stepping out again, Geto?” He forced a fake smile.

“Yes, an old friend is in town. So please be sure to lock up when we close.” Geto pointed his finger at him and then at Choso before he exited again. 

You went back to looking through the records before you could hear someone clear your throat. When you glanced up, there he stood. The one who the guy called Choso, stood right in front of you. His hair was tugged into two ponytails. But it was one unique thing about him that caused you to stare at him as if he was the most attractive guy you’ve seen. A birthmark decorated his face that imprinted from his cheeks across his nose and on his other cheek. It was quite a unique birthmark, something you had never seen before. “Since that guy that just left signs my checks, I am here to ask if you need help with anything.” His monotone voice trailed off as he was avoiding as much eye contact as possible. 

“Oh yes—do you guys have anything from any classical composers?” You asked and you watched Choso’s face scrunched up in pure disgust. 

“Classical?” Choso asked. 

“Yes, I’ll take anything at this moment.” You said. “My godmother has this record player and I just know a classical record would sound so good on it.” 

“Classical?” Choso repeated just to make sure you understand what you just said. 

“Yes, did I not say it loud enough?” You asked in a frustrated manner. 

Choso held up his hand in a defensive mood and would glance over at Noritoshi who was unloading the box of new vinyl records they received. “Hey, check in the back to see if we have anything for the classical genre!” 

“Classical?” Noritoshi looked up and you wanted to question if the two were related with the way Noritoshi mimicked the exact face of disgust that Choso did. “I think we have some stuff in the back though.” 

Noritoshi waltzed into the back to search for the small number of vinyl records they did have. They weren’t selling, so Geto simply thought they were taking up space from other vinyl records. 

You felt the vinyl records that were once in your arms getting gently pulled from your arm. Choso would flip through your options and you watched as he was looking at your vinyl records quite impressed. He held up the vinyl record for Lucky Daye’s Painted, he had a sly grin on his face. If you were bold enough, you would admit that sly grin on his face was cute. 

“I have this one.” He said. “You have nice music taste, minus the classical thing.” He snickered before he handed you the records back.

“You don’t look like the type to like—“ Your words were cut off by him.

“Lucky Daye music?” 

“Yes.” You admitted as you pulled your records closer to your chest.

“Music is something so magical and versatile. It’s a bit insane to stick to one genre isn’t it?” Choso asked as his back leaned against the record case behind him. His arms folded over his chest and you instantly noticed that his broad arms flexed in his black uniform shirt that had Suguru Records on it. 

“But doesn't that contradict you making that face when I mentioned classical music?” You asked, your perfectly arched eyebrows raised at him.

He chuckles at your statement, “I guess it does…” His voice trails off as his dark-colored eyes gloss over your plump lip gloss-covered lips while he is searching for your name. 

“Y/N.” You answered. 

“I’m just curious as to why you would be interested in classical music?” Choso walked towards the register with you not too far behind him. “You don’t look like the type of girl who-“ 

Now it was your time to interrupt him, “See, you’re contradicting yourself again. You just said that music is such a special thing that you can’t just stick to one genre. Judging a book by its cover, something I did a few minutes ago.” You said.

Choso chuckled as he was beginning to ring up your vinyl records. “I guess we judged each other then.” Choso's eyes met with yours. 

“Yup.” You answered before immediately breaking eye contact. Your cheeks felt so hot at the moment like you were standing outside in ninety-degree weather without water.

Noritoshi came back with a box of vinyl records. “These are the only ones we have. I’m pretty sure Geto put them at a discontinued price also.” He placed the box on the counter. “If we were the managers, we would give you this box for free.” 

You giggled at his comment before flipping through the box. “It’s okay.” You picked three random types of vinyl and placed them on the counter. “I’m sure I’ll  probably buy them all by the time the summer is over with.”

You paid for the records and Choso gave you the bag with all of them on it. It was a cute black reusable bag with the store’s logo on it. Choso leaned against the counter and placed his head in the palm of his hand, never actually taking his eyes off of you. There you were completely avoiding his eye contact. 

Noritoshi was looking through the box of classical music vinyl records. “So, are you saying you actually enjoy this stuff?” He asked while flipping through the box of classical records. 

“I’ve listened to that genre since I was in my mother’s stomach. It’s practically imprinted in my brain,” You admitted as you could feel your phone vibrate in your back pocket.

You quickly looked at the text and saw Utahime’s S.O.S text message. She must have needed you at the dance studio. “But I have to run, godmother needs me. I think I’ll see you guys around.” You began to walk towards the exit but Choso’s voice stopped you & caused you to turn to look in his direction.

“Yes, you will.” He admitted with a smile.

Your cheeks burnt, your words got stuck in your throat, and your brain turned into complete mush. You couldn’t say much, but you returned the smile before eventually leaving the record shop as flustered as a teenager in a cliche Netflix-produced romance movie. 

“No distractions this summer, Y/N. No distractions this summer, Y/N.” You repeat to yourself as you are walking back towards Utahime’s place. 

But as you continued to walk, you could hear someone yelling your name. When you turned around, Choso was jogging up to you to catch up to you. 

“You should come out and see me perform,” Choso was fishing in his jeans pockets until he pulled out a tiny folded-up piece of paper.

“You’re a singer? You continue to shock me, but then again that’s me judging you by your looks again,” You admitted.

“I’m in a band. Well, it’s only Noritoshi and me right now. We’re still looking for other members, but I would love for you to come.” He finally unfolded the paper to reveal a flyer. He extended the paper for you to grab.

“I’ll see if I can make it. I’m going to be quite a busy girl this summer, so I don’t want to get your hopes up.”  You said as you took the flyer from him. Your eyes scan over the flyer that looked like he kept it as a souvenir more than to promote that he was performing. 

“You’re only going to be here for a summer?” Choso's eyebrows raised at you.

“Yeah.” You folded the paper back up to give back to him, but he motioned for you to keep it just in case you could make it.

Choso heard Noritoshi calling him from the front door of the record shop and he would slowly walk backward with a smile. His eyes you couldn’t read just yet never looked away from you before he’s parting his lips to speak.

“That gives us three months!” Choso says as he was walking backward.

“Three months to do what?” You asked out loud.

“Three months to get to know each. I’m kinda intrigued on why you’re a classical music fan in this year of 2022.” He yells back at you before giving you a sly wave and heading back into the record shop.

You turned around once again, flustered as ever. You couldn’t even hide the foolish smile on your face at the moment. 

This was going to be an interesting summer.

┍━━━━━━━♡♡♡━━━━━━━┑

tags. @maydayaisha + @spiderpunkfien @bbytamaki @honeybleed @luvliv4lifexoxo @smileyy-cakee

┕━━━━━━━♡♡♡━━━━━━━┙

#choso kamo x reader #jjk x reader #jjk fanfic #anime x reader #choso kamo x black reader #black reader #x black reader #jjk x black reader #angelshubnetwork #jjk smut #⊹˳⁺ ♡ 𝒻𝒶𝓃𝒻𝒾𝒸𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃 𝒸𝓇𝑒𝒶𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃𝓈

[personasintro]

ITS ME AGAIN.

2/2

I would like to express my genuine and serious opinion about MH and the relationship between Y/N and JK. Let's start with the fact that this book needs to be reread few times, to understand better the dynamics between the main protagonists. I'm convinced that reading it one time it's NOT enough to understand what's actually happening. MANY and MANY people comment on it about JK seeing Y/N as a fuck buddy at this point, and nothing more. That he will never see her as a potential girlfriend. The first time I have read it, I got really annoyed and frustrated about this slow burn, like many others who write you these annoying asks. I thought that after so many chapters, basically nothing really happened, that he wants her for sex only. HOWEVER, when I started ready it for the second and third time then + read MH JUNGKOOK'S POV, my jaw dropped, because I began seeing and understanding things I never noticed before. My perspective of the situation COMPLETELY CHANGED . Now, I don't know if you study psychology/are interested in it, or if all of this is just a coincidence made up me and my analysing everything habit, but rereading it carefully, we can notice how well, subtle but clear you're trying to portrait the feelings of both of them towards each other. Let me explain it better.

(THIS MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS) Correct me if I'm wrong, but now that my perspective changed, I see MH JK as a guy who basically craves for reciprocated love, cuddles, attention and mostly important, who can't stay single or alone for too long. Not because he's desperate, but because he's a hopeless romantic who likes to give and receive love. The thing is, if in the very beginning I found very annoying his obsession with Kiko, now I think I understand what actually happened. He is attached to her for the good, old memories she brought him. He wants to bring the nice feelings he had back. In which he truly felt loved and understood by someone. But this doesn't mean he needs specifically Kiko. He loves her, is attached to her, but it's not the same as before. Sometimes we want our ex back because we want the good memories with them back and not specifically them now. More specifically, we want their old selves with us because we romanticise the memories a lot, but in reality we don't want to be with the person they are now. Does it make sense?

Why am I so convinced about this? Because of the fuck buddies deal thing. If he truly still loves Kiko and wants nobody else, in his mind NEVER EVER would have blown up the idea of having sex, and more over, REALLY ENJOYING it with his best friend. If someone is THE ONE for you and you're 100% serious about them, you don't act like a freaking husband with your bff. You made very clear his feelings by his actions. His actions and words speak for himself. He's attracted to Y/N right now, mentally and physically. He doesn't have romanticised old memories with her, so this means he's living the moment NOW and the feelings towards her are new. I can't say he's in love yet, because again, if you're in love you don't go to your ex. However, I'm truly convinced that in the last chapters we can absolutely tell he likes her now. Seriously likes her, but still denies it to himself, because he deeply knows that Y/N is his dearest best friend. It would be messy to date her, because this implies ruining the friendship in case something goes wrong and also she is in his main group of friends. Can you imagine breaking up with her and seeing her in your homies circle? And not having her as your beloved best friend anymore ? Hell no. And mostly important, she NEVER explicitly said to him anything about even the slightest possibility to want him a boyfriend. The dude basically automatically suppresses the thoughts about dating her, because unconsciously he knows it's not worthy and that he still receives the love he craves for from Kiko. She's basically the "comfort zone". Why risking to lose it to try dating someone who doesn't guarantee you anything (for now at least) . But objectively speaking, his words and body already behave like they are almost in love. I'm 100% sure that if Y/N confesses now, he would accept right away to date her. He's too whipped for her. Can't say the same about Y/N, who is the less considerate about her own feelings. No, SHE IS, because she overthinks it A LOT, more than him, but she's worse than him in suppressing the feelings for the same reasons. She tries to gaslight herself even when she perfectly knows it , and she literally goes to tue swimming pool.

that's it for now. I have more things, but let's stop here.

-July

HI you again!

This will be nothing new for some readers, especially to those who have been here from the beginning and has read my responses for quite sometime now (you guys can skip this response because you probably know it all by now hehe) ; you're right. I think too that for some people, it might take more reads to understand the little things that are not so obvious. Again, I'm gonna repeat myself but MH is a story where you should read between the lines. Not everything is clear and obvious. There are little easter eggs throughout the story. It causes people trying to get answers directly from me, since they haven't gotten it in the story. But I do not want to spoil anything, I prefer readers knowing the real stuff from the story. Until the story is not finished, I'll keep my mouth shut and enjoy the chaos 😁

I actually did study psychology, had it as a subject in my school and it was my favorite one. I think my writing mirrors me. I do tend to get very deep and analyze certain situations and people. I think that's what's happening in this story as well (and in my other ones too). That's a very good guess you made here!

It is a very interesting take that you have of him and the situations in the story! I cannot confirm nor deny. All I can say is that Jk really did love Kiko. I've seen in my life people that started hooking up with someone else after their break-up. That's how some people cope with it. Or even if they're fine after break-up, mostly men, think of sex a lot. It's a part most of them do not let go. So in this case, I wouldn't exactly say he didn't love her because he came up with the idea of them hooking up. We all know it was way deeper and complicated than this. It's also fine to enjoy the sex with someone that isn't your partner + when you're still heartbroken and love with someone else. He was surprised himself that he truly enjoyed it. But then again, he didn't exactly tell her to have sex. It's something that happened naturally and overtime. It showed off the beginning of their chemistry.

You've made some good points! I truly liked this analyzation (it's one of the best things about writing, to receive long messages/ask with analyzation!!) and I enjoyed reading it very much! I do have to stay neutral though and I hope you understand that 😁 Thank you again for this message/feedback. It was truly fun to read (I did read it the first time when I was on a walk with my dog and I tried not to trip 🫠). I had some cool responses prepared but I forgot them lolol but I think I covered everything I wanted!

Thank you, sending you lots of love and a huge hug, July! 🩵🫶

#ask #ask: mutual help

[immortalwandererxoxo]

It's me, can't you see?

Pairing: Spawn Astarion x F!Reader/Dark urge

Summary/Setting: “You thought they knew and saw you for who you were. The nights around the campfire, the jokes and stories you shared, the rounds of constant checking in on them, it was all for nothing. The hate in their eyes was apparent and set for who could honestly trust a bhaalspawn, and perhaps this was for the best. You thought I’d be free of these urges, these feelings, this life. I’m done; I’ve had enough of all this; how nice your last sight on this plane would be, those jewel-red piercing eyes."

Rating/Warnings: Basically for everyone just get ready to cry your little heart out lol

Word Count: 1,903

A/N: Sooo this is the first fic I've written in a while, so please be gentle with me. Honestly, I just kept thinking about this kind of scenario constantly running through my head. I'll be posting this here and on AO3 if you prefer to read it there as well! Currently, I am writing the second chapter on this. At first, I was going to only do one shot but the ideas just kept growing lol

-----

It was your birthright; that is what the funny-looking butler has said to you. A gift was to be bestowed upon you, but only if you killed the selunite cleric Isobel… the last hope for last light inn.

Your first encounter with her was tense; even being near her brought on a violent pounding within your skull as if it were to spilt any second; you tried to push past it to focus on the vital information that Isobel was explaining in regards to Moontower, it fell on deaf ears, the roaring in your ears started to get louder, your vision began to darken at the edges, no you thought not now! Your finger began to twitch as if in anticipation of unleashing the same horror that claimed the poor bard Alfira.

You needed to remove yourself now. You quickly mumbled about needing a moment to yourself before sprinting out Isobel room and down the stairs and making your way to the furthest edge of the light barrier to try and gather yourself.

“Breathe, just breathe, please just stop; you silently pleased with just you and your horrid twisted mind. You squeezed your eyes tight, though it seemed to not really matter. In fact, it just made the images appear faster in your mind. Oh, the beautiful ways you could rearrange the limbs of Isobel body, bones snapping, eyes all but gone and left with gaping holes of nothing and filled with nothing, darkness, and hopelessness. The delicious fear of condemning these pathetic souls that cling to life only for it to be snuffed out in an instant just if blowing out a candle. It would be so easy.

The sound of footfalls told you that the others had finished up with the Cleric and had most likely come to see why their leader had run out on them.

“Wretched thing, pull yourself together,” You whispered quickly, trying to dissipate the vile thoughts still wracking your mind and readying yourself to answer the many questions probably going to be hurled upon you.

“Oh darling, was that cleric prattling on too much for you to bear? Even Shadowheart had to restrain herself before tearing into her about her love and how much better her dark lady was ha! Astarion says with a

“Ah, my love, are you alright? Darling your hands!

This is what breaks you out of your dazed self. You open your hands to reveal puncture wounds you had inflicted upon yourself. You didn’t even notice your hands had formed into closed fists, forcing yourself to restrain yourself to the point small droplets of your blood had begun to pool a bit in your palm.

“Yes… I.. I’m alright. I just needed fresh air; this shadow curse must do a number on me. You could feel Astarion eyes boring into you. He must have known you were lying, but he didn’t press further, and you were thankful for that. You were not in the right head space to tell him what you had just expressed, nor did you really feel the others would care when you had more pressing issues to address. You must focus on the task at hand and find the nightsong. Your pain could be dealt with later.

“Let’s head back to camp with the others. Gale said he is trying out a new recipe, and it don’t worry; he even managed to find the good kind of wine just for Astarion.

————————————————————————————————————--------------------------------------------------------------

As Gale started passing out the new stew, he managed to salvage together from the stocked-up ingredients you collected throughout your journey; Shadowheart began to explain the current mission and what you had missed. But your heart and mind weren’t all there, considering what happened previously. When would you be rid of these violent urges, these sick thoughts that clouded your mind?

With dinner complete, you did your normal rounds around the camp, checking in on everyone; you were a bit apprehensive in speaking with Astarion, concerned that he would ask you what had happened since you never really did address why you ran out, but no he didn’t even bring it up, you would have thought you would be relived, but a sharp chord struck you within your heart; did he really not care you had thought your relationship with he was making progress or perhaps that was you fooling yourself into thinking someone could love such a creature as yourself.

Making your way to your bedroll and staring up at the pitch-black sky you knew you would not be getting any sleep; the thoughts in your head of today’s events were ever buzzing about.

You were so engrossed in your thoughts you didn’t hear the pattering of talons upon the dirt coming closer to you.

“You called for me, Milady?”

You sat up hastily. Gods, what did he want you to do now, or what exactly were his intentions of coming to you in the middle of your camp?

“What is it now? If this is about killing the cleric, you can forget it. I already gave you my answer; I refuse to be part of such a massacre, you said with a hushed whisper.”

“Your father was most displeased with this kind of outcome, Milady, dear Master; I want only the best for you; you always did need a little push of encouragement with those urges you get; allow me to give you a hand in this, please,” he pleased.

“I don’t need any push or anything from this so-called father I have never met before!”

You wanted him to leave before anyone could overhear you two, and you would have to explain another thing to the group.

“Now, don’t be this way; your father does love you, miss, how he doted on you so tenderly when you were but a babe, and because of this, he is allowing yet another chance for you to redeem such an egregious display you have made of yourself.

Your hands begin to feel clammy and freezing; the building anxiety takes hold of your body and starts to stir. What is that will do? More importantly, is this something that harms others?

You catch the glint of silver with little red specks encircling something within his clawed hand. It looks to be a coin?

“Here is the deal, master: if this coin falls upon heads, your favorite person will be brutalized! This normally would have been your punishment and a token to your father and would allow this minor transgression with the cleric to be overlooked. If it lands upon tails… no, you know what, master? I shall let you find out personally what awaits you; this will be my little push to steer you in the correct direction for you to grab your inheritance.

A flash of anger flared up within you. “No, what is the second choice tell me now!” Panic filled you as if the first choice was not bad enough; something worse awaited you, leaving you in the dark.

“Oh, don’t be like that, Milady. Be patient here; I’ll toss this coin, and we shall see what fate has in store for you.”

With the flick of his finger, the coin spun in the air. The fear and anxiety that you felt waiting on this damn coin to fall, you tried to make a plan of some sort on how to deal with the said potential of having to kill either Astarion, your lover, or dear friend Shadowheart.

“Oh, master! You are Truly cursed with the most delicious tragedy.”

Your eyes widened, and your heart sped up. Gods, what side did the coin land on? Were you fated to kill your sweet love?

“Now, Milady, stay still. I don’t want to miss.” Scelerita’s hands began to glow red, even his eyes;

Beneath your feet, a red glow, a red circle outlined with what seemed to be blood drops arranged in a perfect circular motion on the outermost circle were some ancient ruins, ones that looked familiar, but you had no time to possibly read them before you felt the excruciating pain of your bones breaking in multiple places, your joints snapping, stretching, your skin being pulled into various directions to cover long new limbs you seemed to be growing, Gods it HURT,

Two additional arms shoot out from your sides. Each hand is morphed into sharp, long, talon-like claws. You feel the sharp spikes and horns poke and prick your entire body, from your head, arms, and legs to the tip of your now-said tail. Great long horns jut out from your now spikey head, and you feel something dripping. It seems to be slick blood from your former form. It’s a miracle you think to yourself that you are not dead from blood loss or, at the very least, shock from the horror show that you are becoming.

But honestly, the worst part of this horrid transformation is the one relating directly to your mouth: two large tusk-like horns protrude out from your would-be former jaw that now splits into somehow four splits of skin that are all surrounded and arranged by pointed and thorny teeth that could shred something or someone within seconds.

“Oh, my Master, you truly are a sight to behold; how I missed this form of yours so dearly! Such a strapping young behemoth.”

You attempt to scream for help from your companions; however, it quickly becomes apparent that you cannot speak within this grotesque form. What were you to do now that you were transformed into a monster?

“Master, this will surely be something you can finally make your father proud of! I can see in your eyes that you are waiting for an explanation of what you are meant to do with this new, beautiful form; allow me to get this started. "

Your now small demon butler has waved his hand and conjured up an illusion of self-disguise into a near-perfect replicate of Gale?! He then opens his mouth, and much to your horror, what he screams out next in a voice. That sounds exactly like him.

“What is that monstrosity?! Everyone! Wake up! There is an abominable monster readying to attack the camp, and they have our leader!” screams the illusion-like Gale.

Your heart begins to plummet into the pit of your stomach, and you quickly understand what this sick lesson is meant to teach you. Your father expects nothing to stand in his way. It does not matter if they are the ones that can help you reach the Baldur’s gate. If they are holding you back from your “gift,” then they must be dealt with, and what a perfectly twisted way for them to be under the guise that this monster has taken their precious leader and must kill it.

You can only watch in horror as you look out to see the flames in camp start lighting up and the yelling and harsh footfalls quickly approaching your location. In the distance, you hear Karlach’s battle cry and the others gathering their weapons.

You swiftly turn your head to see your butler’s face, only for him to give you a sick and cruel smile on your friend’s face. “Have fun, milady, your father, and I wish to see some excellent results from the child of Bhaal.”

And then he is gone, leaving only behind thick smoke and the damn coin laying tails side up.

#baulders gate astarion #baldur's gate 3 #dark urge x astarion #astarion #baulders gate 3 fanfic #astarion fanfic #astarion ancunin #astarion reader insert #bg3 fanfic idea #astarion x you #astarion x female dark urge #bg3 astarion #my writing #fanfic writing #fanfic ideas #hurt/comfort #blood/gore #bg3 art #baldurs gate #bg3 durge #dark urge #dark urge really be going through it tonight #dark urge really fighting them demons :(

[hail-brod]

A Chance and Beyond (4)

Previous chapter: (Chapter 3)

Next chapter: (Chapter 5)

Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Loki x FReader

Warning/s: Light angst?, patronizing treatments/mentions, nothing else probably (please tell me if I missed something!)

WC: 3.6k

The Norns must be taunting you for making you feel hopeless. But a little sorcery bonding is nice. Until it leads you somewhere else.

You remember the day when you and Loki exchanged Betrothal rings.

It was a formal celebration to announce your engagement with the prince. In Asgard, it was tradition to publicly officialize the bind of two people, especially when it ought to be an arranged one. It was a way to let people know that, it is a merry day for Asgard's future and for any suitors planning to court you, to lay off. The same is said for the young prince, Loki. Assuming that he does have a flock of maidens eager to get his attention.

He is a prince after all.

As the people of Asgard cheered for your affiance to the god, you and Loki intertwined hands. Just where your rings are. A gesture that contented the All-father more than ever. Even the All-mother glowed with smiles at your courtly showmanship.

And you remember yourself sneaking glances at the older prince.

Thor.

You we're so smitten when you first saw him the day you arrived in Asgard.

But as you stood there beside Loki, you realized it's no more than just a little puppy love at the man. You decided. He was still handsome and charmingly brave in your eyes but you only savored the limited moment you had with such feelings. It was better for you to let go lest you ruin the honor of your family's name.

Everybody knew the crown prince had no eyes for anyone in particular. He was a youthful god with so many choices of fine young maidens to behold. So you just settled for quick glances and far admiration, even more so that you've been chosen to wed his brother.

You didn't mind the deal. Nor did Loki.

He once told you that marriage was just a part of his duty as a royal prince, to heed his father's wishes. Nothing more than just that. It was all in favor for Odin All-father himself. And you don't think you had the right to oppose his wishes.

You're just a simple daughter of a noble from his court, a mere subject of his.

In fact, you we're quite satisfied at the arrangement. It brought prosperity to your household and a high recognition amongst the nobles. And you know your father deserved the title to be a king's in-law. He has done so much for Asgard and your family, as a wise lord and a kind father.

You never thought of marriage before, that's why you never felt bothered to be robbed off of such freedom to choose a husband. You had older brothers that would inherit your father's legacy, so you weren't as much as fussed about by your parents to set off and be a trophy to some entitled lord.

You enjoyed your position. Especially when you're fortunate enough to travel to Vanaheim and learn the ways of sorcery.

That kept you occupied so much for many years.

But to be asked to marry Loki was never much a disappointment to you. A well-trained sorcerer for a husband and a powerful sorceress-witch for a mother-in-law?

I mean, what's there to refuse?

Other people may not have understood it, but the practice of magic in Asgard isn't as well known as compared to the other realms like Alfheim and Vanaheim. So to have these two people within your reach is quite exhilarating to you.

You thought as much.

The celebrative air in the royal hall was far from dying down when you finally landed your eyes to Loki. Who was, at that moment, already grinning teasingly at you. You had to stop your growing irritation from showing in your eyes as you feigned a smile at him. You hated it when he always catches you swooning at a particular prince.

"Are you seriously mooning over Thor rather than me?" he lowly said to you with a tease. "You must really like torturing yourself after saying that you're done with my brother's charm."

"Pardon me," you faintly rolled your eyes and replied equally with playfulness. "but your eyes must be tricking you, my prince."

He huffed. "We'll see about that."

When the banquet hall feast came, he didn't waste a second and brought his dear brother to you, forcing you to an inescapable rounding chat.

Which was quite a surprise on your part. You thought he would have planned something far more despicable under his sleeves, but it seemed like he was feeling humble. Suppose you quietly swooned at the crown prince while the three of you flowed the conversation. But after that, you didn't pass the chance to cast a simple magic trick at Loki while he entertained his lady guests.

Just a silly parlor trick right up his nostrils.

When he felt magic was at hand, probably nose itching to sneeze a thousand times, you provocatively avoided his hidden glares right at your peripheral view as you only smiled at your new chatty guest, intentionally dismissing him.

But you didn't miss the other guests' condescending stares, boring at your fiancé's form, going as far as distancing themselves away from him. Even hearing someone mutter to themselves the words 'immature second son'.

You recognized their ploys. These we're the other half of the Asgardians that didn't favor Loki well, and deemed him as a—rambunctious troublemaker.

They're not wrong, but they do act as if he'd personally wronged them—which he didn't.

As far as you'd known.

But you still also knew that Loki had done some inexcusable things at court—or even as a person.

You had witnessed him betray someone before, even experienced it yourself. Hel, even the first time you met he almost stabbed you. You had fought and insulted each other, but the storm calmed after awhile. Because you had one thing in common: sorcery.

Through sorcery, you picked at each other's abilities. But also through sorcery, you gave each other respect.

Followed by more common grounds, one after another. Until you crossed the border and saw why he acted the way he is. At first, you understood why his people separated themselves from him, despised him—and you still did—but the fact that, all that time, Loki was also trying not to be who they saw him to be. And then still twisted his intentions into something far more malignant.

That's also part of what you despised in their royal court and amongst the people of Asgard. As much as you ogle at the older prince, they make it a point to give all their praises to Thor, and then push back Loki into his brother's shadow. You didn't find the idea sensible at all even before meeting Loki, but you definitely knew courts can never have a time without taunts.

And it bothered you so that it just became natural for them to ridicule and antagonize Loki, even when after he did his best to satisfy their screwed morals.

Ultimately, he can be just a simple prince with so much naught for petty parlor tricks and a clever silver-tongue, ready to pierce one's own. He became bearable to you overtime. And you guess to him, you we're too.

But he's still remarkably good at concealing anything he feels. There's no wonder why he's a master of persuasion and has an adequate amount of patience.

Well, you? Not quite.

You clearly remembered what you did after you felt yourself increasingly get annoyed by the group of snob noblemen, who in fact, was clearly mocking Loki in their heads.

Next moment, one of the man's drink was spluttering out from his own mouth as his disgust was evident on his face. The magic you casted had altered his mead's taste. Though the worst part is, King Odin was standing mere inches in front of him. The man had spat at the king's face, that was enough to get all of the guests' attention.

You knew you we're responsible for it. So you paled.

Even more so when you spot the queen's eyes on you as she lifted her chin up. You saw the glint in her eyes that made you stand up straight.

By Mimir's head, you thought. the queen will behead me.

You know she wouldn't.

You could say she looked amused, but there's no possible way in Urd's well you're excused to be that unrestrained. That was her husband for Bor's sake! You discreetly flew your eyes away from the scene and the All-mother's face, to which then landed on Loki who clearly saw the mishap.

Now both master sorcerers felt what you did and you have never felt so cornered in your whole life.

But you certainly didn't miss the odd look Loki gave you before it contorted into a delighted one. Almost as if he is proud.

"Looks like you'll be given a scolding later by my dear mother." Loki tauntingly whispered to your ear as he neared.

All you can give him was a pleading look and a hesitant, "She wouldn't."

"She would." he said, and lightly laughed. "But she'll probably realize that that sod deserved it."

You only huffed. "Well, he definitely did."

When you glanced back at him, he was already giving you yet again the same odd look. But it quickly disappeared once he met your eyes as he looks away with a faint jovial smile.

You've never seen him so genuinely pleased more than ever.

When you woke up, your heart was heavy.

You sat there on the bed, your breathing lightly quickening as you tried to process something in your mind.

While you stilled, you dryly swallowed and blinked the sleep away, trying to calm yourself down. As soon as you opened your eyes from your slumber, then sat up to orient yourself better, everything you dreamt just started to fade into missing parts of images.

Panic rises up to you.

No...no, don't....

And as your chest kept closing in, you realized you wanted to go back and force yourself to sleep. You felt like you just ended up in a different reality or in an another nightmare that you've lost in, so you desperately grasped for the dream that's slowly slipping away from your fingertips. You pulled your thighs to your chest and buried your head above.

You crumbled. This is a different reality.

You heaved out a shaky breath as you closed your eyes, only then did you found yourself weeping as the tears welled out from your closed lids. Your nails dug onto your arms while you leaned there.

In that moment, you know you've given up.

You know you're gradually waking up to a reality that's only existed within your mind, and heart. You know there's no way to go back. You know it's gone.

You know you want that life back.

It hurts because you never truly did got tell how much you love him.

Taking your time to sulk and let the weight from your chest disappear, you tried to count to ten. The pace of your hitched breathing begins to slow down until you lastly take a deep breathe, then exhaled.

You dryly swallowed. Early in the morning and you're already having a crisis with yourself.

Hvergelmir could just drown me for all I care.

Alas, you don't really wish that right now. You think that a cold bath would be nice. Your eyes are swollen and cheeks are soaked, and it seems like the brightly lit sun peeking through your window feels too warm on your skin.

But you also take a moment to look around the room, orienting yourself once again. Until you did remember something clearly the night prior.

You heard Loki.

You know his voice anywhere, and it was loud enough to hear and to hear your name at that. Of course, you could not explain how that would be possible. Once there and then just disappear? If it was the Loki from TVA, then he would have had opened a time door, then off you had gone with him. But apparently no. Your mind must have been just too desperate with so many things so you guess you're starting to hear voices now.

It's either that or it was also just a dream.

Yeah.. you thought. just a trick of the mind.

Though, you know in your heart that you wish it wasn't.

When you headed out from your bedroom, with clothes now changed into Midgardian ones that you've scoured about in your given wardrobe, the hall that greeted you was empty. Yet, at the end of it, there we're voices talking. You sneakily walked towards it to see who. And you see two people.

You just realized now why the blond woman with the Avengers was familiar to you. All that's different from her appearance is her hair, which is according to what you remembered was red.

Natasha Romanoff.

And next to her was Steve Rogers.

You slowly let yourself be visible, urging yourself to step out louder to get their attention.

Though, never mind that. They already felt you before you could even take a few steps. Their heads immediately turn not a moment from your spot. You freeze.

Ah, you thought. that's terrifyingly great instincts.

"Oh," Natasha was the first one to speak. "it's you." she looked at you with nothing much but curiosity as she regarded you with a tug from the corners of her lips.

"Hello.." you hesitantly greeted with a small smile.

"Good morning to you." Steve says with a polite nod and a gentle smile. There's that firmness in his eyes mixed with a softness that balances his authoritative and kind nature. But then he struggled to say his next words. "You, uh...We actually didn't got your name."

You raised a brow. Did they not joined to watch your interrogation?

Oh.

You suppressed a laugh and slowly nodded your head. "Yes, I- I know...." you said with a pause as they quirked up. "I know you watched my interrogation. You don't have to lie no more." your eyes went to Natasha who looked quite awestruck, but gathered herself in an instant.

Steve lightly raised his brows and his eyes lowered down in shame as he exchanged quick glances with his fellow Avenger. "Of course."

Natasha turns to you with an apologizing look. "Sorry about that. Tony is just hard to deal with and...we just had to see for ourselves if you can be an ally."

You lightly shook your head. "That's fine now. After all, it is the reason why I'm out of that cell."

Steve lightly chuckled. "You're right. You have to thank Thor for that. He's been very insistent on convincing us to free you. Saying that you're still one of his people even if from a different reality."

You softened at that. "So I heard." you said. You try to recall what Bruce said to you last night, and thought about what else he told you. "What about Loki?"

Steve thinks for a moment before he gave you a faint serious look. "You should keep an eye on him."

Beside him, Natasha huffs with a roll of her eyes. "I don't see it that way." she raised a brow at Steve. "Have you seen how that rascal acted when he heard her name?"

Your ears perk at that.

"I did." he turns to her with a look of neutral assurance. "And he could be plotting something because of it."

The blond woman tilts her head, eyes challenging him. "I'm pretty sure everybody in this building thinks the same."

"Exactly." Steve answers back.

"Why? What did Loki say?" you ask with eagerness. Their eyes turn to you, though Natasha just gives you a smile.

"You'll see for yourself." she says, while she receives a frown from Steve, seemingly lost at what she's saying.

You're no different though. Confusion strikes you, but before you could even crease your bows harder than Captain America, Natasha followed through with her next words. "By the way, dining area's over there." she points towards the place. "You should eat first before the wizard portals next to you."

"What about you two?" you questioned.

"Don't worry about us." Steve replies with a nod. "We already had our fill. You should go eat...You earned it."

You revel at his soft tone and friendliness. Something in his eyes looks like understanding. A look that knows your hardship and the feeling of being lost somewhere. Being lost to time.

There's a wonder at the back of your mind but you just settled for a genuine smile.

When they left as soon as an aircraft landed outside the compound's fields, which you can see now in the light of the day, you ventured forth into the dining space and ate your fill. The meal just sat there and probably prepared by someone. Or something? But you didn't think much of it as you regarded the spacious dining area.

Before you could even feel the loneliness sink in at the sight of the empty seats, you had the feeling of being watched. Maybe even heard.

Perhaps, it's the thing about what Stark said. You are being watched.

You don't know by what but you don't really want to know either, so you just ate.

Sanctum Sanctorum.

That's where you are right now.

And while you are, magic courses through your veins as you kept trying to conjure, absorb, harness, control, anything that you can do to the little pebble of green that doesn't seem to open up to you.

And by you mean open up, trying to find its core of command and borrow its power to somehow lead you to where time is managed. One thing you know about magic, is that it can tell you secrets and commands. It's like an immediate breakthrough of knowledge that you can try to cast until you can be able to familiarize yourself with it.

But with the Time stone, its like there's nothing there. No core.

It's not like any other magic embedded crystals that you've tried to harness or absorb. But you also considered the fact that, this must also be what makes an infinity stone special.

"Nothing?" behind you, Strange stands while the Time stone is placed in front of you as it rests on a crystal holder beneath an antique table.

You turn, breath pacing. "Nothing...I- I don't get it. The stone itself, it's like- it's empty."

Strange's frown before only deepened and he sighs. Both of you had tried it several times. He didn't allowed you to do it in the first place since he had firmly told you before that he should be the only one to use it. But he eventually gave up and lend you a chance to try for yourself.

And now you both found yourselves still unsuccessful.

"How about we harness it both at the same time?" he steps beside you, eyeing the stone.

You look at him for a moment, eyes narrowed. "The stone will be overloaded and probably be destroyed."

He laughs and turns to you with a daring look. "Not if we put little amount of magic."

"Now, hold on." you halt him. "Acquiring the core command would be impossible with little magic—even if you and I combined."

Just when he's about to harness it himself, he lowers his arms down and looks at you. "Any suggestions then?" he says, almost irritatingly.

You think.

How can crystals be used in other ways? You know how to harness the core but what about the outside of the item? It's surface where the strings of magic can be accessed to cast its main level use. The simplest function of a crystal or any other magic stones. What else can it be used for?

You widened your eyes.

Of course!

"Compatibility." you mutter, turning to an increasingly confused Strange as you continued. "We might need to perform a forbidden spell."

"No."

You inhale, getting ready to explain yourself. "I swear to my own life that I will be cautious and perform it carefully."

He gives you a dead look. "And what exactly are you proposing?"

"I have no idea." you honestly say. You see Strange preparing to retort to that but you hurriedly added. "But, there's a grimoire in Asgard that contains the spell and we can use that as a guide."

You've never been really allowed to read that same book since it was prohibited for anyone to learn and use. It has lists of forbidden magics like dark magic and such, but you're clearly in dire need of a solution. And that's all you have left. There's one particular spell that can help you tear through space and time and its no wonder why it is forbidden. But with the Time stone and its ability to rewind events, its doable.

"Asgard?" he surprisingly asks.

"Yes." you nodded. "Your Asgard here should have it."

He only looks at you with a sudden change of his expression. His irritation had dissipated as he sadly frowned at your form.

What...

"Come with me." he finally says, walking past you. "Your fellow Asgardians might be able to help you know more." he then opens a portal to somewhere you don't quite recognize, but you do see a lot of greenery and expansive fields of grasslands.

"Is that...Asgard?"

He almost avoids your gaze and shakes his head. You looked at him in confusion, wanting more answers. He eventually gestured his head towards the portal, urging you to follow, so you did. Stepping out of the circular entrance, you took in the lands as you came to finally see the visible ocean. Along the fields we're houses being built and people scurrying to help—men, women and children.

"Why are we here?"

"To see Thor...and an another asgardian sorcerer who might be able to help us." Strange replies.

"Welcome to Norway."

Previous chapter: (Chapter 3)

Next chapter: (Chapter 5)

Masterlist

Series Masterlist

'A Chance and Beyond' taglist:

@oscarissac2099 @lcolumbia1988

Ko-fi?

#loki #loki season 2 #female reader #loki x reader #tva #tva loki x reader #mcu #marvel #marvel loki #marvel cinematic universe #time variance authority #the avengers #avengers #loki fanfic #loki laufeyson #loki odinson #time slipping #loki series #loki s2 #loki season two #tom hiddleston

[jgracie]

OMG JUST SAW THAT YOU FINISHED BOO

okok here are my thoughts

ew caleo

jason is such a hopeless romantic like when he was imagining his future with piper and then when he pulled her up to the top of the zeus cabin to recreate their first kiss

leo leo leo

leo some more

LEO 👹

nico and reyna and jason would make the ultimate friend group

”hazel and frank didn’t protest. leo had wished they had” OR WHATEVER THAT LINE IS LIKE POOKIE THATS SO DEPRESSING???

the fight with gaea was way too short but the build up made up for it

that scene when piper was like oh no we’re screwed and then jason comes in with like lightning going through his chest or wtv and he’s like saying something all cool 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

them fighting with their parents was amazing my fav was hephestus and aphrodite

the ending scene is so sad (the book actually ends with piper and jason thinking about leo not caleo 😍🥰)

also there was this scene in the lost hero where leo was like i am so scared of being remembered as like the funny friend and like all of my frineds are cool heroes and i’m just leo the tofu taco chef

yeah uhm

that’s exactly how jason and piper remembered him…

CALEOOOOOO OMFG THE LAST CHAPTER WHEN HE CAME BACK TO HER GAVE ME MAJOR MIXED FEELINGS... i always have mixed feelings when it comes to them cz like leo in love is so cute and sweet and then i remember hes thinking ab calypso 😭 like wowww wdym u aren't thinking of my mutual pinkdiorluvr 😭 i just tune it out atp LMAO

YESSSS I WAS SO HAPPY READING BOTH OF THOSE SCENES BECAUSE IVE BEEN PUSHING THE HOPELESS ROMANTIC JASON AGENDA!!!!!! AND THEY AFFIRMED IT!!!!!!!! i feel like because we didnt see jason pre memory loss we forget this man isnt all stoic and serious ALL of the time like the books say he joined the fifth cohort on purpose to make it better and was lowk a troublemaker or wtv it was in camp jupiter?? i forgot the exact wording but LIKEEEE HE IS MORE THAN SERIOUS AND BLUNT! (hes those 2 as well ofc but ykwim)

I LOVED NICO AND REYNA AND NICO AND JASONS INTERACTIONS SM SO I STAND BY THIS TRIO esp the nico reyna interactions they were so sweet tgt literally made me wanna cry i love them both SO much omg.... nico reyna jason trio def do the mama y papa tiktok trend thing LMAO (jeyna truthers rise)

i read that line n wondered if that affirmed to leo exactly how unloveable he is despite the fact that he chose to ask those two for the reason that its in their blood to put duty above all.... leo u r ur number 1 saboteur ur number 1 hater i pray u heal

ANF ONG I WAS SO CONFUSED AT HOW IT ENDED SO QUICKLY was a little disappointed but i never enjoyed fight scenes anw cz i struggle w visualising them so overall didnt rly mind... im much more of a character development girlie like tell me all their inner thoughts pls

THAT WAS SO HOT OF JASON i llove like the 5 times overall rick let him fight without passing out before the action even starts 🙏🏼 free my man jason grace from the shackles of fainting

I LOVED THAT PART SO MUCH ESP APHRODITE CHEERING PIPER ON IT WAS SOOOO CUTE OMFGGG 😭

oh yes ofc it was rly sad i cant believe leo died fr there def wasnt a leo chapter in my copy at the end where he comes back to life and goes back to ogygia ... it acc just ends w jason and piper thinking ab leo idk what these other versions have as the last chapter

STOP I DID NOT REALISE THIS I WILL BE THINKING AB IT FOR THE REST OF TODAY NOW WHAT THE FUCKKKKKKK

#˖◛⁺⑅♡ luvletters #rip leo valfez u wouldve loved anti hero by taylor swift #⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ my lovers

[soupthatistohot]

BSD: An Absurdist Analysis - Chapter 4

Shinsoukoku's first encounter

[Masterpost]

We begin in the middle of Atsushi’s first encounter with Akutagawa, and Higuchi starts shooting at Atsushi and Tanizaki, but Naomi shields her brother.

Now I didn’t really talk about the Tanizaki siblings in the last post partially because I was focused on Akutagawa’s introduction and partially because they’re fucking weird and I try not to think about them too often. That being said, they’re relevant now so I guess I gotta talk about these two people who I hope are not genuinely siblings and just have an incest fetish — which I will specify is still not great, but at least its better than them literally being siblings!

Anyway, I mention the incest thing because… well, it’s absurd. Everyone who is not the two in question is made pretty uncomfortable by it, and even though its played for comedy most of the time, for both Naomi and Tanizaki, their affection for one another spurs them to take action in an absurdist way. 

Naomi, despite not being the ability user of the pair, takes the bullets. Although we know as people who have read BSD that she does this likely knowing that Yosano will be able to heal her, there’s no guarantee of that, and a first-time reader definitely wouldn’t know that. To the reader and even to Akutagawa and Higuchi, Naomi stepped in during a seemingly hopeless situation, even though her actions were likely to only temporarily help. 

Luckily, Tanizaki uses his ability against Higuchi until Akutagawa steps in and easily takes him down. 

Then, we’re left with Akutagawa and Atsushi alone (after Akutagawa slaps Higuchi across the face… not one of his better moments).

For all intents and purposes, Atsushi should have no chance right now. He doesn’t really know how to use his ability, Tanizaki and Naomi are both down and Akutagawa is set up as this ruthless, dangerous, and basically unstoppable force. 

Akutagawa begins the interaction by claiming that Atsushi just hurts everyone around him, sending the latter into an anxious spiral until Tanizaki tries to tell him to run, alerting him to the fact that he and Naomi are still alive and cementing his determination.

At this point in the story, Atsushi only lives for other people, not himself, and this will be his driving force for a while, though his experiences will eventually begin to undo that mentality. It is after this that he decides to fight back against Akutagawa, despite the odds. 

Akutagawa even kind of calls him out on his absurdist behavior, having full knowledge of his own reputation and skills and the apparent likelihood that he would succeed over Atsushi. “Dying for justice…? How cliché,” he says disdainfully.

Atsushi steals his gun and then tries to fire at Akutagawa, but then he reveals that Rashoumon can protect him from bullets and dismembers Atsushi’s leg. Once again, we’re put in a position where it feels pretty much impossible for Atsushi to win, and he is launched into a flashback from his time at the orphanage. He reflects on the fact that he’s been spurned since birth, but even so he continues to fight back. 

So, despite being terrified of his own ability and its potential to hurt other people, Atsushi makes use of it in this moment in order to rebel.

And that’s what absurdity is all about, the act of revolt against what is unfair in life. Atsushi having to face Akutagawa as an opponent right now is wild, for all the reasons I stated earlier, but because Atsushi refuses to give in and accept his own death (even if its because he wants to protect other people rather than himself), he is able to protect himself long enough for Tanizaki and Dazai to stop the fight, and he survives. 

Dazai reveals that his absurdly forward flirtatious behavior from the prior chapter actually enabled him to plant a bug on Higuchi, implying that she suspected her from the very beginning. Higuchi argues that the Port Mafia will decimate the Armed Detective Agency if they don’t hand over Atsushi, emphasizing how large the mafia is and how much control they’ve got. I’ll I will say about this for now is that basically this won’t happen because the agency continues to survive and succeed through the power of absurdism, basically. 

Oh, also? Dazai is revealed to be a defected member of the Port Mafia! But I’ve already talked about his defection and Oda, so I don’t feel the need to reiterate all of that, I just wanted to note that this is when this fact is revealed, and it’s revealed by Akutagawa. I will talk more about Akutagawa’s obsession with Dazai when it becomes more directly relevant. 

That’s the conclusion of this chapter! I do want to mention that going forward Atsushi and Akutagawa’s relationship is going to become increasingly important because they’re essentially the conflict of an absurdist versus a nihilist, and we certainly see the foundations of it in these first few chapters.

[Previous] [Next]

#bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #bsd manga #akutagawa ryunosuke #atsushi nakajima #tanizaki naomi #tanizaki junichirou #dazai osamu #shinsoukoku #bsd 4 #bsd chapter 4 #sskk #bsd absurdism analysis #soup rants

[yoyeolears]

it's okay not to be lonely//chapter 2

zhang hao x sung hanbin

genre: angst & fluff

warnings: death, cursing, a bit suggestive

masterlist: summary | 1 | 2 | 3 pt. 1 | 3 pt. 2| 4 | 5 | 6 (final)

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chapter 2: because of you everything started to change

word count: 2,057

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11th of November 2023

Sharing a strawberry ice cream with Hanbin on his breaks quickly became a habit. Every Saturday without fail, he would show up at the convenience store, shoving the items on the counter before Hao with that infectious smile of his.

“Ready for our date Hao?”

He couldn't pinpoint what Hanbin meant with his choice of words. In fact, he didn’t understand the meaning behind his words at all. Hanbin couldn’t possibly be into him like that. His best guess was that he was teasing Hao as he usually did. A month into their  friendship Hao had figured out that Hanbin found his awkwardness endearing, so he took every opportunity he could to engage in playful banter. Hanbin never went too far with his jokes, of course, but he would always say something that would make Hao's entire face go embarrassingly red.

Realistically, he could’ve asked what Hanbin meant. After all, there was no harm to it. The latter claimed that he was Hao's friend and friends asked each other questions all the time. However, Hao was simply put a coward. That, and incredibly unsocial. He wasn’t too sure how to ask and he was also terrified of finding out Hanbin's response. What if he thought Hao was disgusting for his way of thinking and cut ties with him? Losing people was unfairly easy. He knew that better than anyone. It was the same reason why he had refrained from getting close to anyone. Until Hanbin. Hanbin had been so persistent that Hao just couldn’t push him away even if he wanted to. No matter how awkward or even rude his replies got, Hanbin would still smile at him. He would still come back every day. So, he accepted it.

He accepted what the other male gave him, and he wasn’t going to take it for granted.

Hao scanned his items and then placed them back in front of him with a shy smile.

“Just give me two seconds.”

“Sure! I will go wait for you under the gazebo. Just meet me there when you are ready.”, Hanbin announced.

Hao watched him walk out of the store, deep in thought. He really didn’t get why Hanbin was so interested in him. This friendship had occurred so out of the blue. He remembered Hanbin mentioning that it wasn’t his first time seeing Hao in Professor’s Park class. In fact, they had shared a class each year since the start of their university years. So, why now?

He sighed. He was never going to get answers until he asked. Yet, he pondered the same things every day. He truly was hopeless when it came to human interactions.

Hao grabbed his jacket from the coat hanger next to the register. It was already the middle of November, and the weather was getting extremely chilly. He couldn’t afford to get sick. He had to work to make it through the winter. Ironically enough, considering he was about to eat ice cream.

He found Hanbin sitting in the usual spot under the gazebo, ice cream already melting in his mouth.

“Don’t you think eating ice cream in this weather is perhaps not the brightest idea?”, he queried.

Hanbin cachinnated, drips of melted ice cream nearly spilling out of the edges of his mouth.

“Why not? I think what’s not smart is not doing what you want to do.”

“Sometimes, you just don’t get to do what you want to do.”

Hao wanted to slap himself so much at that moment. Maybe then whatever parasite was residing in his brain would take a clue and declare permanent vacation. He couldn’t believe he made such comment. Not only would it lead to more questions by Hanbin, but he had also potentially ruined the mood. He was pretty confident there would be no more ice cream dates now.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to ruin the mood.”, he silently apologized.

Hanbin frowned at him, “What are you talking about? Nothing wrong with what you said. In fact, you are right. We don’t always get to do what we want. However, I think it is important to do what we want when we can.”

“Is that why you decided to talk to me now? Because you couldn’t before?”

That evil entity had to be actively possessing his body if his mouth was running this freely. Hao could not even remember the last time he had been this direct with someone. Even before his parents’ death, he was known for being a reserved and quiet kid. He would avoid confrontation, never pick up fights with anyone, and he always apologized for the smallest of things.

An evident contrast to whoever he was right now, making him unsure of what type of response it would generate from Hanbin.

“Actually, I was too scared to talk to you.”, the other male hesitantly confessed, eyes darting everywhere but Hao's face.

His fixated gaze on the ground wavered. Slowly, he turned to look at Hanbin. Hao always avoided meeting his stare due to the looming fear of the latter reading him like an open book, but this time Hanbin was not looking at him. For the first time since Hao met him, Hanbin was looking at the ground himself, cheeks flaring up a pretty shade of red. Hanbin was blushing because of Hao. The little pest danced in victory. He had been the cause of Hanbin's flustered state for the first time. Well, the possessed version of Hao that is.

“Huh?”

That dumb response again. He was a disaster. He had been doing so well at not making a fool of himself up until now.

Hanbin shook his head amused, “There is that response you love again.”

Hao pouted, fiddling with his fingers.

“You just say things I don’t expect.”

The male quietly laughed.

“I am sorry. I know I can be a bit upfront.”

Hao quickly protested, “That’s not what I mean. I, erm, haven’t really interacted with many people the past few years so I don’t really know what to expect sometimes.”

Hanbin gave him a nod of affirmation

“May I ask why?”

Of course, he was going to. It was to be expected. Hanbin had been hanging out with him for more than a month, yet the former barely knew anything substantial about Hao. Meanwhile, he knew everything about Hanbin. From insignificant information such as the reason why he explicitly hated bananas to first heartbreaks and more heartbreaking experiences, such as his parents’ recent divorce.

“Well, you didn’t tell me the reason why you were scared to approach me.”

“Where is that confidence coming from Zhang Hao? I love it.”, Hanbin gasped.

The demon in him must be having a party up there, celebrating his undeniable success at playing puppet with Hao. His face bloomed an equal shade of red to Hanbin's. Hao: 1 – Hanbin: 85. No, he didn’t actually count every time Hanbin made him blush, but if he had to make a quick guess it would most likely be a disconcerting number.

“Honestly, I was just too shy to talk to you. I know I may not seem like it, but I am not the outgoing person people make me out to be. I always try to be kind to people, but I more often than not get dragged by my friends to whatever social activities they have planned. So, it took quite a bit of courage to approach you. You also looked like you didn’t want to be bothered most of the time. Except for that day when you came in late. You looked crestfallen. I just knew I had to say something.”

Hao never thought anyone would care. He had felt that he was invisible throughout the past years. He had no one to hold him during his parents’ funeral, or comfort him when his nights were filled with terrors. Yet, unbeknownst to him, Hanbin had been trying to get close to him him all this time. Whether that was due to pity or genuine intrigue was a different story.

Hanbin could tell there was a lot going through Hao's head, so he decided to conclude his explanation.

“So, that’s the reason why I didn’t speak to you sooner. As peculiar as it might sound, I mostly keep to myself. The only reason I am friends with Sua and Jiwoong is thanks to Matthew. He has always been the type to make friends with everyone he finds interesting enough, and he practically dragged me everywhere with them when they started hanging out.”

Hao nodded, picking at his nails. He couldn’t imagine a scenario in which Hanbin was not the social bee that everyone believed him to be. Perhaps the male was more similar to him than he had initially thought.

He tried to come up with an answer to Hanbin's initial question that wouldn’t make things become way too depressing. Despite his obvious lacking in social and emotional skills, he could tell when a conversation was already starting to turn gloomy. And Hao had struggled with such conversations all his life. Opening up to people had never been his strongest point, more so after losing his parents. His mum said that he had always been hesitant around others from a very young age, always shying away from attention and making the first move. Now that he had lost the two most important figures in his life, letting people in had turned into a colossus obstacle.

“My parents died a couple of years ago.”

What a way to soften the blow. However, Hanbin didn’t say anything, allowing him to continue.

“I guess it really affected me on how I viewed relationships, so I naturally drifted away from the rest of the world. I thought that if I stayed alone, I wouldn’t have to go through the pain of losing the people I care about again.”

Hanbin simply nodded at his words. Hao had never anticipated a person’s response so much in his 21 years. His response could realistically change the entire course of their friendship.

“It must have been incredibly hard to bear it all alone. Fuck, a few months back one of my white t-shirts turned pink and my first thought was to call my mum. It was such a small, minuscule issue, yet she was the first person I thought of calling. I cannot imagine not having them during my most important or hardest times of my life. I would be nowhere without them. You are such a brave person for enduring this all on yourself. I am proud of you Hao. And I bet they would be too.”

Hao jut out his bottom lip, mouth twisting to a pout. He could feel the water pooling his eyes.

“Also, turns out you can’t undo the damage. The t-shirt I mean. I just had to buy a new one and learn a very important life lesson. Do not put mixed colours with whites.”, Hanbin pointed out.

Hao laughed. He laughed the loudest he had laughed in the past years. And then he cried, the water finally escaping his eyes. He cried for all the sleepless, lonely nights, the birthdays, friendships, and experiences he had missed all the past years. He cried for all the pain he had to endure and carry all alone. He cried for dooming himself to a life where he was destined to be alone, devoid of any comfort and love. Loss can be an impending curse, and Hao allowed for himself to be cursed.

Laughing through the tears, he turned to smile at Hanbin.

“Thank you.”

The expression of worry that had been shaping on the latter's face turned into one of confusion.

“For what?”

Taking Hanbin's hands in his own, Hao spilled his true emotions once more, “For not making me feel alone.”

The male squeezed his hands reassuringly, “You’ve never been alone Hao.”

And just like that the dam broke again. Only this time, it was in the flaming warmth of Hanbin's arms.

“It’s okay. Let it all out. I’ve got you.”, he reassured Hao, patting his back soothingly.

Hao clung on tighter, burying his blurry face in the crook of Hanbin's neck. He embraced him tighter and tighter, until the warmth spread through his body like a blazing fire.

Indeed, everything changed at that moment.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Author's Note: And we are back! I want to sincerely apologise for the delay in getting this out, but being a master's student is a whole different experience. The next chapter will most likely be split in two parts since as of right now it is way too big. I can't guarantee the next update, but I am hoping to release part 1 by New Year's.

As always, thank you to everyone who decided to read. Opinions, comments, and thoughts are always welcome. Stay safe and happy holidays to anyone celebrating.

-Jina

#zerobaseone #zhang hao #zb1 fanfiction #zb1 scenarios #zhang hao x reader #zhang hao imagines #zhang hao fluff #zerobaseone scenarios #zerobaseone fluff #zerobaseone imagines #zhang hao x sung hanbin #hao x hanbin #sung hanbin imagines #sung hanbin #sung hanbin fluff #haobin #zb1 hanbin #seok matthew #kim jiwoong #zb1 ricky #zb1 imagines #kim bora #shen ricky

[class1akids]

I would give so much to see Shouto there and the trio back again but it seems even more unlikely now, I at least expected the Todoroki fam to have a clear conclusion and not just end with an apology that we don't even know if Shouto could hear it or not.. I think it would be great if they could bring Shouto back into the game first, then the rest of the class. Especially I can't comprehend the fact that someone who is so involved and related to the All Might plot isn't there right now, is this like 'He chose to help his family, so he lost the chance to be here' thing? Isn't Shouto's motive was to join his friends and be free, away from the family conflicts at least after dealing with them by stepping up? Didn't he earn the right to be alongside them by stepping up? Wasn't Iida's "now it is your turn to become the hero you want to be" about him wanting to be with his friends? that's not even where he wants to be right now, so it is literally uncomplete. His story was miserable from get-go why is he the one getting this cliffhanger kind of end, where I can't even feel happy for him that he saved so many people? Chapters of development only for him to get this? I don't know if it matters for anyone, mostly for dudebros, but I also have waited so long for the quirk awakening. Yes he is quite powerful and it seems like he does not need one but isn't it so unfair again? Many characters getting their magical, no effort quirk awakening moments when one thing he had against Touya was his own move he created training his ass off. (Not to mention narrator managed to made it look like Touya copied the move in seconds too but he can't even possibly copy it except the technique, and the hard part was containing the move with two quirks simultaneously, it was a 'positive' move to cool off Touya without hurting him, so there was no point of that.) In the last crumb of where he is passed out they said "Shouto completed his mission" so i lost my hope even more even though I expected something after his Rising chapter. Short chapters for him but long ones for other fights and characters even though most are trivial compared to Todo fam plot. I want to be grateful considering Horikoshi's health, he is doing a lot, but there are so many things to complain about because it is him again out of everyone, how is it always him getting this treatment? Feels so unfair and almost deliberate. It is extra upsetting since this is the end and there will be no turning back from all of this, whatever we can get we are getting now. I don't know if I should have hope I keep hurting myself by waiting and wishing he will wake up and join but I will be on cloud nine if he does lmao

Oh I definitely feel you.

I was pretty ok with the Todo-fam conclusion, even though we got cheated out of the color page and like the chapters were super short.

But then Toga vs Ochako got so much better art and so many more double pages, and Ochako got a quirk awakening after Bakugou had two already and then this absolute BS All Might vs AFO got like 8 chapters, and yeah, it's hard not to feel like us, Shouto fans have been shortchanged.

I feel pretty hopeless right now, and it also kind of soured for me the All Might- Shouto convo from Ch 386 (which I loved when it dropped), but which now feels like it has been just an excuse to get him away from this fight. And yeah, the message feels pretty shit - Shouto cannot be part of the main fight or the victory or the future icons, because he's burdened to clean up after Endeavor and doesn't even get much thanks for it.

It was a good climax for the family plot, but it's a very unsatisfying ending for Shouto as a character, who deserved so much better and should be part of the future pillars and should be part of the final victory.

If it was my story, I'd give Shouto a power-up for absorbing Dabi's fire and make the whole "he copied Phosphor" count into something (like Bakugou "losing" to ShigAFO gave him a power-up too) and have him come and help out against Tomura. But it is not my story, and sometimes I really wonder if Hori just hates Shouto.

My only hope for him to show up is that the TogaChako stuff also got left hanging and Ochako's power up really seems like it would be a good counter for some desparate Shigaraki move. She barely got to use it before she went down. So Aizawa/Kurogiri portal better get the Gunga gang here.

Also, yeah, Class A absolutely deserved better. Kiri, Momo, Iida got really screwed over especially out of the more important students. It makes me pretty sad that we spent so much time and color pages glorifying side characters like Gentle, and then never give proper highlight to beloved characters from Class A.

#c1a asks #bnha manga spoilers #bnha manga leaks #bnha 403 #bnha critical #sad shouto fan hours

[angel-eyes05]

i remember his hands - preview

PAIRING: kang the conqueror x fem!reader

SUMMARY: after a scientific experiment goes horribly wrong, you've been transported to the quantum realm and have been stuck there for the past decade. with no company, aside from janet van dyne, your life changes forever when a mysterious man in a golden ship crash lands next to your settlement. startled with his initial presence, you two have a rocky start. but as time goes on, you two find each other slowly drawn to one another. you have secrets though, and he has a past he refuses to bring up. can you two make it through navigating an unknown world together, discovering any ulterior motives, and stand the test of time in a place where time has no meaning at all?

INFO: slow romantic burn, pretty fast sexual burn, kinda enemies to lovers????, takes place during that little flashback janet has during quantumania, idk how accurate this is gonna be to canon stuff cause i get very confused about the quantum realm lol, reader is in mid to late 20s while kang is in his “early 30s” (ik he like technically doesn't age or whatever idk the lore but i just made it accurate to jonathan majors age and wanted to give an accurate age range/gap/count), y/k is very fleshed out like i give her everything lol

WARNING: implied su!c!dal thoughts

CHAPTER WORD COUNT: 570

NOTES: hi there!!!! did i make an account just so i could post this? yes, yes i did, and what about it. I was looking for quantumania!kang fics and turns out, theres like 3-4!! so i was like, hey why not. please don't judge my writing cause this is the first fic i’ve written…like ever lol. also, please suspend your disbelief for this, like don’t question why they have working appliances or whatever or that i made up names for the monsters or something, cause 1) idk how to explain that stuff and 2) that's not the main focus sooooo yeah. but, nonetheless, i hope you guys enjoy, if anyone even reads this at all even though this is mainly for my sake lol.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

It’s been ten years. Ten years since it all went wrong and you landed in this wretched place. Ten years since you’ve had a decent meal and been able to sleep soundly without having to worry about the creatures of the quantum realm getting you in the night. It got slightly better around seven years ago when you found Janet Van Dyne, someone who had experience in navigating this strange world. About 30 years of experience in fact. The thought of you being down here for that long made you nauseous. 

Every day was the same. Wake up, check the settlement perimeter, help Janet with breakfast, hunt surrounding mites, occasionally go into town to trade for parts, eat dinner, then go to bed. Thank god Janet was there or else you might’ve gone insane by now. All this repetition was not your style at all.

You missed life up above. You missed going out with your friends. You missed running into people at the grocery store you haven’t seen since elementary school. You missed your yearly trip to New York during Christmas and seeing everything so festive. It sounds pretentious but it was the truth.

But what you missed most of all was San Francisco. It sounds stupid but you loved it there more than anything. You loved how the flowers would bloom during the springtime. You missed feeling the wind through your hair, as aggressive as it would be at times. You missed going to the beaches. Being in the cool water, feeling the sand in between your fingers and toes, being kissed by the sun. God, you missed the sun. Everything was so dark down here. So…hopeless. Thank god Janet was there or you might’ve…

There wasn’t any point in thinking like that anymore. You had accepted life the way it was. It wasn’t like you had a solid plan for making it back home anyways. As much as you did miss it, it wasn’t like the power of hope, love, and friendship would make a quantum tunnel appear out of thin air. Even if you could find someone selling the necessary pieces to power the tunnel, they would probably be listing it at way too high of a price for you to apprehend it. So for now, and probably for the rest of your life (however long of that left you had, time was strange down here), all the good you can do is try to protect yourself, keep Janet company, and stare at the stars, or whatever you wanted to call them. 

That's exactly what you decided to do before heading off to bed. After checking the surroundings of the settlement for mites, you sat next to the closest thing you could call a creek and just stared up at the engulfing darkness. The tranquility this activity brought you allowed you to sleep soundlessly, without an unknown creature coming out of the shadows to attack you. While staring up at the twinkling lights, you see one of them in the distance that appears to be moving closer to you. As it gets closer, you can make it out as a circular, golden ship. It crash lands about 300 feet away, causing the earth around you to shake. Curiosity takes over you as you decide to start heading over to the crash sight, unaware about how much the repetition of your life you always complained about was about to dissolve.

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NEXT PART

A/N: hiiiiii, so that was the quick little preview, i hope you liked it. i’m gonna be honest im very nervous about posting this lol 😭. but i hope you enjoyed it. chapter 1 should come out shortly after i post this so i hope you’ll stick around for the rest of the series!!!

#i remember his hands #kang the conqueror #kang x reader #kang the conqueror x reader #marvel mcu #mcu fanfiction #fanfiction #fanfic #mcu phase 5 #quantumania #ant man #fem!reader

[blametheeditor]

just found you and I LOVE your work, but I wanna see what happens after ‘Terms of Agreement’ the cliffhanger is INSANE! IM GOIN NUTS RAAAAH

Welcome, Anon! I'm glad you've enjoyed your time so far, but you're so right I did leave you hanging!!

Forewarning, this is a rewrite! However, I have a whole plan I promise I will be following...and shouldn't take too long. But I hope you enjoy it, and that this is a good cliff-hanger-not-cliff-hanger-cross-my-heart-it'll-continue-soon!

Terms Of Agreement 2.0 | Chapter 1

Next

Run Down: The monster under your bed, the one in the closet, and your sleep paralysis demon fight for custody.

Content Warnings: Mentions of sleep paralysis, hallucinations, and sleep deprivation. Mentions of death, murder, and accidental deaths. Mentions of treating others as lesser than, addressing someone as 'it'

Vincent deserved a bigger entrance

_______________________________

Fritz should’ve known better than to think tonight would be the one night he didn’t fall asleep or wake up to terror. 

“Wakey, wakey! You’ve got a big day ahead of you.” 

The all too familiar voice seems to make the very ground shake. Something that shouldn’t be possible, and he knows this is all in his mind. But it feels all too real. His eyes forced to open even as he desperately tries to keep them shut. 

His dark room greets him, with seemingly nothing out of place. Until his pupils expand, and his blanket becomes fingers longer than he is tall wrapped around his bed. One’s that squeeze, feeling like he’s going to get crushed. Unable to breathe properly. 

One night. I just wanted one night.

“You know what they say, Fritz,” the voice taunts. Laughs when all the trapped teenager can do is allow terrified tears to fall. Unable to move or speak. “Greif can make the mind all the more susceptible to such troubling things.” 

Fritz tries to get away. Close his eyes. Brace himself, anything. But the worst part about sleep paralysis is the fact it’s in control. 

An arm materializes within the darkness of his room. Shadows bending to form the rest of the giant who’s fingers are steadily increasing pressure until it seems like he might be forced into sleep once more. A smile longer than he is tall is stretched into a wicked grin that hovers too close for comfort, eyes larger than his head void of pupils yet it’s easy to tell he’s the center of attention. 

It’s terrifying. No matter how many times he’s greeted by this particular hallucination, Fritz fights tooth and nail to try to get away even though it isn’t real. His instincts only demand that he needs to get away by any means necessary, but he can’t run from his mind. And even if he could at the very least scream, there’d be no one who could come running. 

The monster sneers when he can’t so much as blink. “It’s adorable how terrified you are. Always entertaining. Always fascinating how much you fight.” 

The fingers finally loosen their grip, allowing Fritz to finally get a full breath of air. He feels his body wanting to choke on it, but his fear overrides the spasms, completely paralyzed and at the will of his own mind. The one that wants to rub it in his face no one, not even himself is on his side. 

Just get it over with...

“I thought we talked about this before, Fritz,” the giant tuts. “You’re the one who has to make the final decision.” 

At first the teenager feels genuinely confused. Despite the numerous doctor visits and consultations, he’s never be able to control his sleep paralysis. Too many variables that even if he stays on a strict sleep schedule, or sleeps in every position but his back, it seems like it will never go away. Nor can he influence how long he’s trapped in this awful limbo. It might be one minute, or five, or thirty. Not that it ever matters due to always feeling like it will never end. 

“Heavens you’re hopeless,” is said in a way that feels like it was meant to be fond, but he knows better. Remembers his worst mistake in trusting the hallucination didn’t mean to be malicious, right up until it kept him trapped in a nightmare as he begged to be freed. 

The giant suddenly gives him a pitiful look. “Do you remember what I said? That I could make all of this go away?” 

Fritz feels like he’s being squeezed again, but the fingers originally pinning him down have now completely left. No, this time it’s because he’s faced with the terrifying choice all over again but now with the main reason, arguably the only one for why he didn’t agree before gone. 

He tries to close his eyes and hide away. From the hallucination, from the world, wishing the darkness would swallow him whole so he doesn’t have to face the day that will be coming any minute now. His ‘big day’. 

Of course Fritz can’t close his eyes or turn his head. Only watch as the giant suddenly looks sympathetic. 

...what would happen if he agrees? Nothing really should happen, this entire interaction is due to his sleep paralysis. Even if it does feel like something else entirely is pulling the strings, this really is just his mind taking full advantage of his terror and stress. More than happy to add his grief into the mix. 

One that makes his throat close up at the thought of facing the hallucination before him all alone. Because footsteps won’t be racing to his room when he manages to get a scream out. Nor will warm arms appear to wrap around him when he sobs after it ends. No promise she’ll do everything in her power to make it all go away. He’s convinced his mom knows magic, never failing to make him forget about all of it before he’s going to school. 

...did. Did know magic. 

Fritz’s jaw sets when he realizes she also would’ve been upset he’d think about making a deal with his sleep paralysis. Would be genuinely disappointed he’d want to fraternize with the enemy. He shouldn’t trust something that has done nothing but terrorize him for most of his life. 

Maybe another time.

A twisted smile appears on the giant’s face. “I would say I admire you. But I’m afraid you’re going to genuinely regret declining my offer. Though it’s going to be quite entertaining seeing your reaction.” 

Fritz feels his heart beat wildly against his chest at what sounds like a promise. What did it mean by seeing his reaction? Why does he have a really bad feeling? 

Before he can try and think of an explanation, his room explodes with light, the redheaded teenager quickly shielding his eyes as he looks around his room. Sinks into his pillow with a song sigh at the hallucination not attempting to pull any tricks. Has to clench his jaw firmly shut to keep from yelling for his mom. 

Finally he glances toward his alarm clock declaring it’s 8am. A friend of his mom is supposed to come to the house to help him out with a few things at around 1pm. He had been excused from school today and was told to sleep in, but things had other plans. Certain giant hallucinations made out of shadows things to be exact. 

Fritz groans as he drags himself out of bed, wincing when he realizes he’s drenched in sweat, his hair stuck to his forehead in a proclamation it’s somehow even more of a mess than usual. He’s also pretty sure the bags under his eyes have become more and more noticeable over the past week. And considering the fact he didn’t go to sleep last night until 1am can give a good picture of how terrified he was sleeping the first night that he- 

Deep breath. One step at a time.

Shower. He should shower, and then go from there. 

Clean clothes are snatched out of his dresser with a narrowed look sent toward his closet before opening his bedroom door to walk down the hall to the bathroom. 

Except the moment he opened the door, a twisted familiar smile that’s as long as he is tall sits only a few feet away. 

“Well you certainly don’t mind keeping us waiting.” 

Fritz slams the door shut, pressing his back against it as his entire body trembles. It’s only a few seconds before he joins his clothes on the floor, his knees shaking so badly he can’t stay standing. 

He didn’t notice he wasn’t breathing until his chest constricts, choking as he forces himself to breathe just breathe this is a dream it has to be a dream this isn’t real. 

It feels real. So real Fritz can only wrap his arms around his knees as he curls into a ball, not bothering to wipe away the tears that fall. Tries to take deep breaths but continuously failing as his lungs refuse to take in more than short little gasps. 

What happened? Is it getting worse? He is hallucinating outside of his sleep paralysis? If it is, is he supposed to continue seeing the same giant who torments him consistently? Is he even awake right now? 

...is he awake? 

Fritz’s head snaps up to stare at his room. With sunlight streaming through his blinds. No obvious indication of the hazy feeling he gets when dreaming. And he’s not paralyzed. 

“You’re not dreaming, Fritz,” the voice that haunts him almost every night taunts through the door. Makes the air shake. “Come on out, we won’t bite.” 

We. There’s more giants? 

He doesn’t want to open the door and find out. But if he doesn’t, when will he be able to leave his room? When someone comes to rescue him? Is it possible to just wait it out? The knocking on his door says he can’t. Not when he could feel the wood bending from the sheer amount of force used. 

Fritz slowly stands back up, grabbing the handle to steady himself before tensing as he cracks his door opens. Stares at the colossal being watching him with amusement, head propped on a fist. 

That’s when he notices the fact the giant is lying on their side. Inside a hallway he’s memorized by heart. Yet the walls stretch so high above he can’t see through the sliver he opened. 

This can’t be real. 

“Cool trick, huh?” the giant rumbles with a smirk. Fritz can’t help but feel like he’s being watched like a new play thing. “We can manipulate the house to accommodate our natural forms while your bedroom remains untouched. And as soon as the front doors open, everything goes back to normal like nothing ever happened. Every human none the wiser unless they stay inside when the door closes again.” 

He latches onto a few things. The fact the possible hallucination is content to just talk to him for now. Prideful his legs are only mildly shaking. Fearful at the idea his home will tower over him without a way for he himself to reverse it. Terrified it’s constantly mentioned there’s other giants. 

When the giant doesn’t speak again, Fritz carefully opens his door a little more. Watches with held breath if a hand is going to lash out to grab him. Takes a moment to decide the amused smile is a good thing before slowly peering out into the hallway, his blood draining when it continues to stretch. Knowing the kitchen is only a few doors down, but he can’t even see the end before it becomes blurry. 

“Wh-Who are you?” 

This is the first time he’s ever been able to actually speak to the hallucination. Actually, it’s the first time he’s really been able to see it clearly. The white voids of eyes and uncanny smile are things he can identify without fail. But he hadn’t realized the recurring giant was actually a deep purple instead of just darkness itself. With long hair tied back into a ponytail. Wears a short sleeve button up that’s the same color purple as it is. 

“Vincent,” the hallucination responds. “Nice to properly meet you. Though I’m sure the same can’t be said for you.” 

No, it can’t be, but Fritz doesn’t say it out loud. “So this, this is real? You- there's o-others?” 

Vincent chuckles, a sound that sends a chill down his spine. “I have done quite the number on you, haven’t I?” 

He doesn’t know what that means, but he’s too scared to ask. He also can’t help ducking further into his room when the being sits up, causing an earthquake by the simple motion. Shaking his head at Vincent watching him with interest tens of feet above him. Feeling absolutely miniscule, inconsequential, wanting to run back into his bed and hide under the covers and never come back out. 

“You’re adorable,” the giant coos. “How about I introduce you to the others, and then we’ll let you have an existential crisis.” 

Fritz didn’t have enough time to realize what that meant before a hand is reaching toward him, one with fingers that have time and time again squeezed him without remorse. It’s enough to let his instincts take over, turning toward his bedroom as his hands grab for the door, intending to close it and never open it again. 

But he doesn’t make it. He feels suffocating heat at the same time something trips him. He can’t even scream as he falls against leathery skin, only tries to grab the handle just within reach when he’s lifted up, up, up, the ground falling away so quickly his stomach lurches and his head spins. Curls into a ball as he tries desperately to breathe and not panic as the fingers push him further into a palm five other people could join him on to effortlessly trap him inside a fist. 

Please don’t drop me! 

It’s the only coherent thought he can manage as he hugs himself. Flinching when he feels a jolt that rattles his very bones. Confused, and terrified, and gasping when his dark cage shakes rhythmically. Feeling like he was plunged into cold water at the realization those are Vincent’s footsteps. 

“Don’t go too overboard. He’s not taking it as well as I hoped.” 

Fritz isn’t able to ask what the giant holding him means, not when the fingers suddenly open. He’s blinded momentarily for the second time that day, blinking rapidly to try and figure out where he was taken, who was near him. 

He swears his heart stops at the sight of two other giants. Each staring at him with a mix of indifference and annoyance. As if one wasn’t enough. As if he deserved to be surrounded by beings who seem like they’d prefer him to be dead above all else. 

He doesn’t trust Vincent, not in the slightest. But Fritz couldn’t help grabbing the nearest finger as the hand tilts with the intent to slide him onto the counter. The very same counter he helped his mom prepare food for cooking on for numerous occasions, and yet is now bigger than a football field. Not wanting to face the fact this is real, and not wanting to be completely vulnerable in case the other two decide to just smash him like an unwanted pest. 

The thumb he clings to flexes in the attempt to dislodge him. He only closes his eyes as he holds on tighter, earning another chuckle from Vincent as a sigh comes from somewhere behind him. 

“Fritz, we are not allowed to harm you intentionally,” a voice he’s never heard before rumbles like thunder in the same way Vincent’s does. That and the wording used doesn’t do anything to quell the redhead’s fear. “We have an important matter to discuss, so we would appreciate it if you cooperated.” 

It sounds so...he wouldn’t call it reassuring, but it makes Fritz feel less like he’s about to be killed being addressed in such a way. He’s not safe, and he still has a really bad feeling, and tone makes it clear he isn’t thought of someone worthy to speak to. It lies more on the respectful side than taunting, though. 

He looks up to see Vincent give a look to say he’s waiting. Glances over his shoulder to see all three are still watching him. It’s enough to make his nerves get the best of him, his arms finally shaking so much he looses his grip. Yells as he slides onto the counter he jerks away from with how cold it is on his hands and feet. 

“It’s still dressed for sleeping,” a new voice pipes up. Fritz is hoping it’s the last one. 

“I wasn’t exactly able to warn him what kind of company to expect,” Vincent hums. “Not to mention I grabbed him right in the middle of his morning routine.” 

“Considering the circumstances, we can discuss what is expected of him moving forward and allow this to be forgiven.” 

Fritz stares up at the other two, finding himself actually looking at them now that he’s been promised a form of safety. He didn’t know what he expected after meeting Vincent, but these giants look much more human. The one who speaks with an air of superiority wears a full piece suit fitted with a blue tie, and even has pupils rather than a blank void for eyes. And the one who addressed him as ‘it’ wears a polo shirt, though with pitch black eyes. Both with normal complexions, short black and brown hair respectively. 

What are these three? 

“With that now out of the way, allow us to introduce ourselves.” The suited giant locks eyes with Fritz, making the hair on his neck stand on end. “We have been fighting over the rights to your soul from your tenth birthday up until now. The methods in which we were able to entice or forcibly take it depended on our respective abilites.” 

“Every competition over a soul has three competitors,” Vincent continues. “A sleep paralysis demon, a monster under your bed, and a monster in your closet.” 

The last giant gestures toward Vincent, Fritz tensing as it briefly casts a shadow over him, afraid it’ll turn into a grabbing hand. “The rules normally followed have strict guidelines. Due to the death of Marilyn Smith, the last attempt under the previous terms was conducted this morning. It failed, and now another agreement has been made.” 

Fritz is unable to find his voice as he looks between the three, unable and not wanting to accept what’s being said. Because they’re talking about children stories. Ones he once believed in when he was a lot younger before realizing that sleep paralysis was the real culprit. 

But they’re claiming his hallucination from sleep paralysis, Vincent, was an actual being. A demon who terrorized him every night rather than something his mind did on its own. And, if that’s the case... 

Fritz looks over at the twisted smile as he trembles. “I was so close too. But, you didn’t agree for letting me have your soul. So we’re now here, fighting over custody the civilized way.” 

The only being with pupils rolls them. “The term ‘custody’ is utilized by humans when two or more parties are wanting possession over something or someone. Considering it’s the most suitable way to describe this situation in terms you can understand, yes, we are fighting for custody.” 

“Unfortunately, you are 16,” is said in a monotone voice, and yet there’s a distinct feeling of anger that makes the teenager want to move farther away. “And that gives you the right to choose who gets your soul.” 

“Wh-What?” Fritz asks before he can stop himself. He almost lifts his arms up to defend against grabs from anger, but none of them are upset he might’ve interrupted their speech. They almost look just as surprised as he is. “What do you mean? I, I choose?” 

Vincent shrugs. “It’s only fair. We’ve been at each other’s throats for 6 years, yet no one has been able to kill the other. You’ve also consistently declined each of our offers, and that’s something to respect.” 

“Speak for yourself. I could have earned 2 souls in the time it’s taken us to get this far,” the suited giant growls, giving a look that makes it clear Fritz is nothing more than an annoyance. “I view this as a failure on our parts.” 

“Don’t mind David,” Vincent sneers. “He’s just upset he’s still stuck at 99 souls.” 

Fritz doesn’t know what that's supposed to mean. He doesn’t want to know. He wants to wake up and realize this was his worst vivid nightmare to ever have. He slept in, and his sleep paralysis took full advantage, and- 

“It’s hyperventilating.” 

“Him, James. How many times do we have to tell you?” 

“As many time as I have to say it’s still a soul no matter what form it takes.” 

“Oh you poor thing.” 

The last sentence is said in a way that doesn’t make him feel cared for but rather he’s an unwanted pet. But he can’t fight the hand that scoops him up. Not when he can’t take a full breath no matter how hard he tries, tears blurring his vision, afraid because he doesn’t know what they’re going to do to him. 

He then becomes absolutely confused when the grasp doesn’t confine him, but instead he’s just...held. It only gets worse when a finger carefully rubs his back and his first instinct is to lean into it. When he isn’t pinned, he tries to wipe his tears away, jerking back as a fingerprint as big as his head appears to brush his hair back. 

The redhead can’t help feeling suspicious from the gentle motions, but he doesn’t question Vincent’s smirk hovering a few feet away. “There you go. Can’t have you dying on us.” 

“Are you coddling him?” the voice he thinks is David’s demands. “There’s still more to discuss.” 

“I take it this is your first custody battle.” The hand lowers to Vincent’s chest, letting Fritz turn to see no one has moved from their spot, glares all turned to the demon holding him. “Humans are a bit fragile. They tend to die from the most random of things.” 

“I was under the impression it’s at an age where it can take care of itself.” 

“A full grown adult wouldn’t be able to handle this well. Give the kid some credit, I’ve had my share of humans who didn’t survive meeting one of us, none the less three.” 

David looks down at Fritz with a wide eye stare. “You’re saying we have to be careful with him?” 

Suddenly he doesn’t want to be put down again. Not when the two looking as if they just realized they’re catastrophic beings to him that could kill him with a single finger would be in arms length. Who could pick him up and accidentally squeeze too tightly...and that would be it. 

“You have got to be kidding me,” Vincent grumbles. “We’ll talk about ensuring he isn’t sent to the angels later.” 

Fritz’s heart leaps into his throat as he’s lowered toward the counter again, this time the giant quick to move his thumb out of the way so it can’t be grabbed, leaving the redhead sliding off the warm hand without issues. Just like before, the cold counter has him folding into himself to keep himself from freezing, too distracted to try and ask about angels. 

Vincent then leans in to earn full attention. “This is how things are going to go down, Fritz. We are going to reside here with you until one of us is chosen to have claim over your soul. You’ll continue going to school, work, hanging out with friends. Just a normal human living a normal human life. However, whenever you are here, we will be offering deals and utilizing every tactic allowed to make you choose one of us. We can’t trick or coerce you, but we can certainly make your life absolutely miserable.” 

Fritz trembles as the demon’s smile grows wider and wider as he talks. Making it clear without a doubt he’ll be enjoying every second of this. 

“We will also have a schedule in which certain nights will be dedicated for one of us to use as we please without any limits on time except for the sun’s setting and rising,” David adds, looking smug at the horrified look, pleased at how absolutely terrified Fritz is at the thought of Vincent being able to put him under sleep paralysis for an entire night. 

“There should also be an expectation the entrance door will always remain closed,” the last demon, monster, James finishes. Fixes Fritz with a stare that feels like it’s pulling on his soul. “We are to be treated with respect. Any attempt to undermine us or the rules set in place will be met with significant consequences.” 

“Any questions?” 

Can I accept your offer from this morning?

Fritz’s entire body trembles. He wants to ask a question, say something, but his mouth refuses to cooperate. He can’t even nod or shake his head, only look down as he lifts his hands up. Stares at them shaking so much he wouldn’t be able to properly hold anything. He has a strong feeling his legs are just as bad. 

“Is that a bad sign?” 

“It really is fragile.” 

“Come on, let’s get you back to your room.” 

There’s warmth as purple fingers curl around him. He manages to look up at Vincent’s twisted smile, but the demon doesn’t coo at him or trap him inside a fist. He’s only carried out of the kitchen he grew up filled with utensils he and his mom picked out that are now twice his size. Back through the hallway that would have taken him several minutes to walk down instead of the 17 steps it’s taken only just last night. Unable to fully comprehend his door is exactly as it should be as well as the rest of his room. 

“We’ll talk more when you’re ready,” sounds like a threat. But Fritz can only stumble into his room before weekly shutting his door, crumbling to the ground as footsteps walking away cause it to tremble. 

He wants to do nothing more than to crawl into bed. Even if he could, though, he’d be too afraid to sleep. 

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

#thank you so much for the ask! #don't tell anyone I completely forgot about this story despite all of the lore I have lined up #so thank you for reminding me!!!! #this will be added to the list to remember and continue #including ghosts because I need to continue the ghosts #but I hope you enjoy and have a great rest of your day and week! #FNAF bois #g/t #giant #tiny #Terms Of Agreement #BTE writing #cw #content warning

[analogwriting]

It Comes in Waves

Chapter 26: Amplitude

Trafalgar Law x gn!reader word count: 2.8k first|next

Boy howdy, did shit escalate quickly. You were currently running through the halls of Kaido’s castle. That was also currently flying through the air. You’ve taken out…you don’t know how many people at this point. They seemed endless. They also seemed to multiply. You take down one and two more show up in their place. 

You came with Law, but at some point the two of you ended up separated. It was easier that way anyway. He had been quite distracted with you at his side. He was so worried about protecting you that he was leaving himself open. You had saved his ass on more than one occasion due to that fact.

“Fucking-” You had let out a groan of frustration. “Look after your own damn self!” You went to retrieve your knife out of some man’s skull. “I can’t keep saving your ass!” 

Law glared at you, a small tint to his cheeks. “Well, if you hadn’t insisted on coming while you were recovering, I wouldn’t worry so much!” He groaned right back at you. 

“Again,” you said, flinging your knife right at him. He opened his eyes and stiffened only for the knife to glide past his head and to an assailant behind him. He turned around, his eyes wide as he watched the pursuer fall to the ground.

“You really are hopeless. Watch your own ass or I’m leaving you to fend for yourself,” you had said.

And now here you were, making him fend for himself basically. You didn’t do it on purpose, it just so happened your fights took you in different directions. Again, this was for the best. You both could focus better without the other around. As long as you were still ‘recovering’, you would be a distraction to Law. Despite all your protests that you were fine, that the incident with your heart had reset you in a way, he just wouldn’t believe you. 

It was a little agitating. You weren’t made of glass. You wouldn’t die just because you passed out. Luffy did the same shit all the time. Always pushing himself to the point where he’s out for a while but he sleeps it off and no one worries, so why couldn’t you do it?

You groaned as you thought.

“Not a good idea to be distracted on a battlefield.” Irritation had finally gotten to you and you didn’t even bother looking before you sent your knife flying through the air and into the guy’s skull. It was just another faceless foot soldier of Kaido’s, but you probably should’ve at least made sure.

You walk over, retrieving your knife once more. 

“There you are.” This time, you did look first. There was Law, panting as he looked at you. You sighed, shaking your head. “I hope you weren’t searching for me. I will be so unbelievably agitated,” you mumbled.

“Actually, I wasn’t. Finding you was a bonus.” You narrowed your eyes at him, not quite sure if you believed him or not. He returned your glare, folding his arms across his chest. “What? You don’t believe me?” You shook your head. “Not really, all things considered.” 

You two stood toe to toe, glaring at each other. You opened your mouth to say something else when you heard a voice come from behind him. 

“Quit your fuckin’ flirting with have a yonko to beat, lover boy.” Peeking  around Law, your eyes fell on Eustass “Captain” Kid. You glared at him, rolling your eyes - it wasn’t even worth your time to try and argue with him. That’s when you noticed Law’s face red as a tomato. You looked at him. Before you could ask what was going on, a voice rang out from behind you. Loud and shrill.

You looked behind you, noticing Big Mom for the first time. How in the hell did you not notice her before. “What in the fuck?” you mumbled.

“Now who isn’t focused,” Law teased with a smirk, seeming to have recovered from Kid’s comment, and you smacked his arm. “I don’t want to fucking hear it,” you mumbled. 

Just then, you felt something from deep within your chest. That tugging sensation you had felt once before - on Zou.

He’s here. 

Your head whipped around. Who’s here? Where? Law looked from Big Mom to you. “What’s wrong?”

“I…have to go…” You started down the hallway and he caught your arm. “Where are you going?” You saw the look of concern in his eyes. You knew that if you stayed, you’d only distract him from his fight because he’d try to keep you from being injured, that much you knew. He needed his full focus on this fight. You couldn’t let him worry about you.

“Law, I’m begging you to trust me, okay?” Your voice was soft and he looked at you. His gaze was intense, but you’d gotten used to it. Almost all of his gazes were intense. He was a man of strong emotions, no matter how much he tried to hide it. You knew.

He sighed, nodding. “Fine. Just…remember your promise.” You offered a small smile, nodding. “Of course.” Then he let you go and you took off running down the hallway. You had no idea where you were going, you just followed that tugging feeling and your feet. They seemed to know the way.

It took you to the end of the hallway where there was a giant hole in the side of the castle that led down to the ocean below. Without hesitating, you jumped, diving into the water down below.

“ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?”

You couldn’t help but crack a wide smile as you heard Law’s voice bouncing off the walls. You knew he was going to absolutely scold you later - never gonna live down this one. It’s exactly like Zou all over again. Only this time you knew you’d be just fine. Law knew it too, but it didn’t mean he had to be happy about it.

As you headed down to the dark waters below, you noticed a spot glowing in the water.

This way.

You summoned a column of water to engulf you midair and bright you safely into the depths below. You might be a child of the water, but falling from such a height to the surface would likely kill you just as it would anyone else. Once you entered into the chilly water below, you looked around for that glowing spot you had noticed up above.

You noticed deeper in the water, the glow but it was fading. There seemed to be something in the middle of it. Using the water around you, it forms around you and propels you forward like a torpedo. As you grow closer to your mark, the glowing light around the figure fades, but you’re able to find him now. The ocean is dark, but thanks to your kinship with the vast waters, you could see just fine.

Which means you also made out just who the figure was. It was Luffy. “Luffy!” You propelled yourself forward faster, taking him into your arms. You look around. The Polar Tang was around here somewhere as Law had instructed. 

Once more, a glowing light was seen in the distance. You were able to see something inside of it. That had to be it - it was the only thing that made sense. You propelled yourself towards the submarine. “Stay with me, Luffy,” you thought to yourself as you shot through the water. Within moments, you were in front of the Polar Tang, tapping on the glass to get the attention of those within.

They looked at you, their eyes widening. You pointed to them, then pointed up. “I’m going to get on the upper deck! Surface!” They looked at you and nodded, confused on how you could talk in the water without sounding like…well garbled. It was as if you were speaking on land. 

You quickly swam up to the upper deck as the submarine began to rise to the surface. Once there, you set Luffy down, examining him. Footsteps could be heard followed by the swinging of a door as the other crewmates of the Heart Pirates ran on deck.

“What do we do?” “Give him pills?” “An injection?” Voices surrounded you in a panic and you sighed. “No, none of that.”

“Someone go and fetch a lot of meat. He’s going to need it,” you say, examining him. After a moment, you place his hand on his chest. It’s sea water, after all. You should be able to pull it out of his lungs. You weren’t sure how well CPR would work since he was made of rubber. 

Once your hand was placed on his chest, you closed your eyes. You could sense the water that filled his lungs and began to move it. You pushed it from his lungs and up his throat. It wasn’t long before he began coughing up the water. You pulled your hand away, letting him take care of the rest.

Just as you predicted, he started groaning for meat. Clione stepped out to the deck with a plate piled high with meat just in time. “Right here, Luf,” you said, thanking Clione and setting it next to Luffy.

It didn’t take long for him to eat the meat and whatever else that the crew brought to him as you sailed back to the shore. You moved him to the ground where he grumbled about needing more meat. You couldn’t help but laugh at his request. “Luffy, you ate everything on the submarine. The only thing left is the submarine itself.”

“I mean, it does look like a banana…” His mouth started watering and you groaned. “Luffy, you cannot digest metal, please don’t.” 

Some confusion later, you were able to get more food for Luffy. Enough to sate his hunger and replenish him. “Alright, time to go back!”

The next sequence of events happened so fast you weren’t sure what happened. A large, pink dragon appeared - confirmed to be Momonosuke. Luffy hopped on top of his head, stretching his arm out and wrapping it around you as he pulled you with him, causing you to yelp as he did so.

One thing led to another and now you were crashing through Kaido’s castle. At one point, you burst through one of the floors. “What the-?”

“Strawhat? Y/N?” You look over, seeing Law, Kid, and Big Mom. You just wave sheepishly as you’re crashing into the next floor with Luffy and Momonosuke. You hear Law call your name one more time and you just know he’s really going to give you the world’s biggest scolding later. The stunt jumping off the castle and into the ocean was already enough and now you’re doing more reckless things.

He was going to kill you if you didn’t die yourself first.

Eventually, you were able to jump off of Momonosuke, shouting to Luffy to kick Kaido’s ass and that you’d meet up with him later. You had nothing but faith in him. You knew he wasn’t destined to die here. He was going to save Wano.

You tried to figure out where you were, getting turned around several times. You took down a few enemies in the process before you finally found the big hole your pink dragon friend had created when he crashed through. You glanced down, seeing both Law and Kid on the ground, looking absolutely spent. Big Mom seemed to be monologuing about something as she stared up at the ceiling but in the opposite direction of where you were at the moment. You decided to use this to your advantage.

You jumped down, landing yourself in between the two pirate captains. “What the-” You shooshed them, slamming either of your hands on their chests and pushing them back down. “Just sit,” you commanded. With the tone of your voice, Law didn’t seem to dare move and Kid tried to but the look you gave him made you stop.

The water moved from your flask, down both of your arms and down to your hands. It spread across both captains' chests, glowing lightly. You began to heal them both, closing your own eyes as you braced the pain, biting the inside of your cheek. You did notice that the ratio of pain you experienced as you healed them went down, but it still fucking hurt.

Law seemed to notice this time. “Wait, stop,” he said, trying to sit up but you pushed him back down. You opened your eyes, looking at him. “Don’t move.”

“No, y/n, stop.” He put his hand on yours, trying to move it. “Law, please.”

He looked at you, slight panic in his eyes. “You promised,” he said softly. You nodded. “I know, just a little more.”

“I don’t know what the fuck is going on but can you not flirt in front of me - it’s disgusting.” Kid griped, causing the both of you to glare at him.

You felt one of your ribs fully crack and you gasped, letting go of them both as your hand flew to yourself. “Shit,” you mumbled. That’s what you got for not paying attention. Law looked at you. “What happened?” You shook your head. “You have a battle to win.”

Kid was already on his feet and Big Mom’s attention was back on them. Law looked at you, cursing under his breath as he stood up. By the look in his eye, he didn’t want to leave you but he also knew you would be just fine on your own. 

Slowly, you made your way away from the fight, not wanting to interfere in any way. You also knew the further you were, the more Law would relax and focus. 

“Mother’s Visit Cannon: 3000 Leagues of Misery!” You looked up, noticing a large woman forming. She looked like she was made of flames. What the hell was that? You watched in horror as the woman easily took out tons of pirates. 

“These souls are extra special,” you heard Big Mom say. You noticed Misery heading towards the Heart Pirates and you moved fast despite your own injuries. You were in front of them in seconds, not too sure what you were going to do.

“These souls are all from those who perished in the oceans around my land.” You heard Big Mom’s signature cackle and felt your own blood run cold. Souls specifically lost at sea? She kept them compartmentalized like that? That was beyond fucked honestly. “These souls are more ruthless as the way I attained them was more…forceful than those who gave them willingly.” She cackled, the noise bouncing off the walls and giving you even more of a headache.

You braced yourself, hearing Law shout for you and the crew to dodge. Right before Misery reached you, she stopped. When she stopped, it felt like the world did. You blinked, unsure how to take things. What could this large, flaming woman possibly want?

Misery lowered herself in order to see you better. “You’re…” You blinked again, not really knowing what was going on. “I’m…?”

“You’re a god from the seas, right? So you’re able to free us?” Your own eyes widened as you stared. What the hell was this about? You weren’t able to do shit like that. “I’m afraid you have the wrong person…”

“Misery! Attack! What are you doing?” Big Mom was shouting and you noticed Misery seeming to break from her trance from you, her angry demeanor coming back. She moved to swipe at you before she stopped again. “We can’t anger a god!” One of the thousands of souls seemed to shout from within Misery. They all seemed to start arguing with each other as they regained their own sentience - no longer one hivemind. The more they argued, the more they pulled apart. 

She was becoming unstable all because you looked like a god? Wow, what a compliment. You’re not sure why. Your mind wandered to the woman in the water you had seen. At the time, you didn’t really think she looked like you, right? Well, she had been made of water, that didn’t help too much. You did remember Doflamingo mentioning you looked like your dad, so you weren’t exactly sure what the hell was going on.

Besides, if you were a god, you wouldn’t have injuries like this. Using your own abilities wouldn’t tax you as much as they do. You’d be able to take people down in one blow. There wasn’t any possible way you were one. Who knows, maybe descended. The history of your people is still somewhat lost on you, after all. You were never able to fully learn about the history of your people.

Luckily, this all proved distraction enough for Law and Kid to deal their deadly blows. The Heart Pirates crew and yourself watched as Big Mom was taken care of. You noticed Law’s technique and immediately felt your heart tug. A blue hue trapped her, silencing her and everything around her. 

#one piece #law x reader #one piece x reader #one piece x you #trafalgar d law #trafalgar d water law #trafalgar law #trafalgar law x reader #iciw #am fics

[march2nd]

FIRST BLOOD

chapter IV - FIRST BLOOD next

i seriously can't wait to write about the games already, i have so many ideas, but bear with me until then

tw: canon typical violence, mentions of psychological distress, reader is still a minor in this chapter!

word count: 1289

During breakfast you can't help but frown. The favoritism towards Xavier is blinding, sure they boy seems to be good at everything he does and seeing Beetee being so full of himself makes you want to vomit. You haven't got any chances to show yourself and present your hidden talents (that are so hidden you are not even were of them). Sitting next to him you feel like a side character, someone who can be sacrificed so their golden boy can pull it through. There is nothing that can you make feel any better, that's why after eating small breakfast you go straight to the desserts. Eating the third lemon macaroon and sipping your extra sugary latte you put on a good face to the bad game. Minutes ago you have decided to try and win over Beetee as Wiress seems to be absent again and you suppose she won't be much of a help in an area. If you win his favor maybe he will convince Xavier to make an alliance with you, which would allow you to stab him in the back in the area. Your plan seems convincing but you are not sure how would you realize that - you have only two weeks to transform into a murderer that would ideally not break down in the middle of killing. The odds are definitely against you as you are neither skilled in this matter nor able to imagine yourself murdering anyone with cold blood. You need to start acting now if you want to survive day one.

"Beetee, what's your opinion about alliances? And what do you think would higher our chances?" Interrupting the conversation you try to make contact with your mentor. "By the way, I think training separate won't do us any good," you inhale. Before falling asleep you tried to come up with the idea how to get closer to Xavier. Initially you wanted to train separately, but he must start seeing you as more than just a hopeless girl. "If Wiress is unable to help us that leaves me and him with you and I think the sooner we start the better," you start speaking faster and faster, trying to get to your point sooner. "Maybe we could start training today, in this train?" You propose shyly.

"Woah, girlie, slow down!" Says Xavier mocking you. First of all, you are not a girlie and second, you won't slow down. Until your last breath.

"I think she is not speaking nonsense," adds Beetee. 'Why the sudden change of heart?' He looks at you, looking for answers.

"If you were to agree to my proposition and started helping us now then we wouldn't have to wait until we reach Capitol and each of us got their personal trainer. It is only logical that now we all spend time together learning and coming up with strategy, am I not right?" You bat your eyelashes at both of them, impatiently waiting for an answer.

The rest of the morning you spend discussing how to win the games and learning unknown facts from the past - like how your mentor electrocuted six people securing his win. You wouldn't have guessed it ever, but you suppose that everything can be a weapon. In your case the greatest of them all is your mind, as it seems that your tactics seem to be working as Xavier enters your room later that day.

You talk about everything and at the same time nothing, while you are both painfully aware that you are both leaving something behind and whoever comes alive from this won't be unchanged. In the worst case scenario (and at the same time the most probable one), when you both die you have agreed that you want to change something from others from your District. You will show them all, that the kids from Three are not to be looked down upon. There is a crazy idea forming at your head but you are too unsure of it for now, to say it out loud. Before he leaves you to your own thoughts he makes an unexpected confession. Playing with his own hands he says: "About those knives... I kind of lied as not to seem weak, you see in the fabric we have darts and I'm quiet good at this game so I figured throwing knives and darts aren't that different." Dear God, you just realized how awkward your companion is. You chuckle. "Don't worry about it." You smile, but it doesn't reflect your real emotions. You have to come up with different plan, because pairing up with him doesn't seem to guarantee your safety even on day one anymore. When he leaves you want to rip all your hair out. You can't feel too disappointed about him lying because you are not any better. You can't see any resolution to your situation, you feel helpless and this is what it takes for you to breakdown and start crying.

Life is already too short and you won't allow yours to be cut in half. When it starts to be getting dark outside you emerge from your room. You want to binge watch the previous games to learn from the mistakes of your predecessors. It resembles watching sacrificial lambs being slaughtered by animals that only wear human skins. Nothing about Careers seems to be real, when they fight they are not people anymore but wild creatures that find joy in killing. Everything about them screams to stay away and pray they won't find you. You note that some children and teens from your District are smart but never enough to survive. Some of them build impressive weapons, but there is no point in them as they can't use it properly. Eating an apple to give your brain sweet sugar rush you come up with a brilliant idea. You want to start laughing but you remind yourself that it is night already and you don't want to wake anybody up.

Here's the thing you came up with. You have two mentors who have won a long time ago, but Careers have recent Victors. That means they are being mentored by people who won one, two or five years ago. What you have to do is to watch the recent games and try to understand their respective fighting styles and strategies. They might have been preparing for the Games back in their Districts but it's the Mentors who ultimately shape them into who they are in the Area - there is no other explanation why 1 and 2 fight like beasts and 4 tends to lay low until they pull something out of their sleeves. That scares you, not knowing what to expect from them - they can fight, place traps, catch you in a makeshift net or drown you.

Watching the recaps helps you in formulating the intricate plan. If you play it well they will remember you for a long time, just as you remember the boy from 65th Hunger Games who seemed to be just unreal - sure he was a killer but in contrast to other Careers he didn't seem to be taking immeasurable joy from taking lives. His skills with trident and knife made him deadly but what amazed you was his ability to make traps and create makeshift nets that actually worked and held tributes in place until they were met with their unavoidable death. Watching all of this makes you want to scream. YOU CANT WIN THE GAMES. YOU ARE ALREADY DEAD. But after all, you can't let the hope in you die.

NOTES:

i went with the flow in this chapter, also people what do you think about my writings? im dying to read your opinions!!

tag list: @randomgurl2326, @meri-soni-meri-tamanna

#finnick odair #finnick x reader #forget me not #the hunger games #fluff #angst #xreader

[analleycat0g]

My fav fanfic ever. (I'll upload a part 2 if asked)

Tangled (L x Light) by Kailthesnail on Ao3.

Warning. In this story there are mature scenes. Please do not read if uncomfortable with that. (ALL rights go to kailthesnail)

Chapter 1 -

“Hmph.”

Light rolled onto his back, stirring in his sleep. Faint and quiet sounds woke him from his deep sleep.

“Ouch.” Light heard L hiss and he opened his eyes.

“Ryuzaki what are you doing?” Light said, sitting up to get a better look at the detective sitting up in bed next to him.

The faint dimness of the sun creeping back into the sky lit the room up ever so slightly, just enough to make out shapes in the shared bedroom.

L had been staying up profusely late as they got a new lead in the Kira case, and after many times Light scolded him for the bright laptop screen, he accepted defeat and just rolled the other way every night.

With L designating so much of his time to the investigation, he has done a poor job at taking care of himself, which led to the situation he was in now.

L was holding onto the handle of his hairbrush, the bristles tangled in his dark hair.

He whipped his head to the side, seeing Light awake.

“My apologies, Light. I didn’t mean to wake you.” He said in a hushed, monotone voice.

“What are you doing?” Light asked again sleepily, hoarseness disguising his voice.

“Brushing my hair.” L said, trying to hide the fact that the brush was indeed stuck in his hair. He was struggling to get it out for the last 30 minutes, and he didn’t want to admit defeat to the tool; let alone admit defeat to Light.

“Well can you be quiet, I’m trying to catch up on sleep that you keep interrupting.” Light said with a huff, turning back around and pulling the blanket over his head.

L took a deep breath before tugging on the brush again, wincing and hissing in pain.

Light threw the covers and sighed loudly. “Ryuzaki, what did I just-” He stopped and saw the tangled disaster that was the left side of L’s messy black hair. “How the hell did you do that?” Light asked with disbelief as he leaned to get a better look at the tangled brush.

L remained quiet, finally dropping his hands from the brush and huffing in frustration. “I don’t know. Watari normally does this for me.” He muffled quietly,

feeling almost ashamed that he couldn’t complete the most basic human function.

“Were you twisting it and trying to get it stuck on purpose?” Light teased as he pulled on the handle.

“Ow, bastard! Don’t do that!” L swatted Light’s hand away, the sharp pain lingering on his sensitive scalp.

“Let me help, you idiot. If we don’t get it out then you’re not going to shut up and let me sleep.” Light said, agitated that L had the audacity to smack his hand like that.

He turned on the lamp and sat up criss-cross in front of L. “Let me look at it.” Light said, swatting L’s hands from the handle as payback.

“You’re just going to yank-”

“No, I’m not! Move!” Light huffed before slowly turning the brush and trying to see which way the brush was tangled.

To no surprise, it was tangled every which way. “I don’t understand how you could even-”

“Don’t ridicule me, Light, just help.” L said, frustration turning into hopelessness. He was starting to think he got it too tangled in his hair, and feared he would never get it out.

Light examined the brush intensely, finally waking up before standing up. “I’m going to get detangler, don’t make it worse.” Light said before getting off of the bed and digging through his bag, the chain of their lengthy handcuffs tugging ever so slightly.

He hopped back on the bed with the bottle before soaking the wadded-up hair in the detangler.

L noticed that it had a pleasant smell, which lifted his spirits. “It smells like strawberries.” He mumbled more to himself than to Light.

“Yeah and this shit is expensive so you better pay me back for it. I practically had to use the whole bottle.” Light teased, but with more of a playful tone than the insulting manner he had when he first woke.

Light worked at pulling small strands away from the brush, successfully getting good-sized chunks out of the bristles.

“Light, can you be more careful?” L said as he pulled his head away from Light’s hands.

“Ryuzaki can you stay still?” Light replied, gently tugging on the brush to get L back in his reach.

L winced and huffed, his poor scalp burning from the tugging.

Light noticed the pain across his face and almost paused what he was doing. Instead, he gently held his fingers across the roots of L’s head as he pulled more pieces out. This decreased the tugging L was getting tired of.

Ryuzaki’s breath stopped in his throat as he felt Light’s hand on his head, wanting to flinch away from it and lean towards it at the same time.

Luckily, Light was focused on working the strands loose to even notice.

L picked at his own fingers in his lap as Light was working the brush free, almost savoring the human contact.

Light’s whole hand had come to rest on the side of L’s head, still applying pressure to his roots to immensely reduce the pain.

L noticed the warmness of his hand pressing against his cold product-soaked hair, closing his eyes as he finally started to get tired after 72 hours.

He leaned into Light’s hand ever so slightly, his thoughts drifting off-

“Got it!” Light said with pride, holding the brush in front of him.

L’s eyes opened immediately as he smiled softly. “Thank you, Light.” He whispered as he touched his wet head, feeling the clump of tangled hair.

“We need to brush the rest of your hair so this doesn’t get tangled in it again.” Light said, happy that he achieved the seemingly impossible.

L nodded and reached out for the brush, only for Light to hold it away from him. “You actually think I’m going to give this back? I don’t have the patience to do that again.” Light said with a chuckle before pointing to the floor in front of the bed. “Sit there.”

L blinked a couple of times before crawling off of the bed and sitting on the floor with his knees to his chest.

Light put his hand back on the top of L’s head and started to brush the thick black hair.

Light took into notice the softness of the detective’s hair once it was actually smoothed out, gently running his fingers through it after the brush.

A shiver ran down L’s spine, gently shaking at the touch. Light immediately noticed and blushed, his face turning red as he realized he was basically petting the man who is framing him for mass murder.

“Can I have more of that spray?” L asked, looking up at Light, who quickly turned his head to hide his red face.

“Uh y-yeah… but like I said it’s expensive-”

“I’ll buy you more.” L interrupted before looking forward again.

Light took a deep breath, trying to calm himself, before spritzing the detangler in all of L’s hair.

He resumed the brushing, finally distracting himself with the brushing and forgetting about L’s reaction.

“Light-kun can I ask why you are blushing?” L asked, no emotion in his voice as he nibbled on his thumbnail.

Light felt heat rush to his cheeks again. “I-I’m not! It’s just… hot in here.” Light barely hid his lie.

“Hm… Light-kun typically has the room at 68 degrees, which is rather cold. I can turn down the temperature if you'd like.��� L stated, who didn’t need to look back to know that red had stained Light’s face again.

Light swallowed and nodded. “Yeah, sure.” He said before putting the brush down and scratching the back of his neck. He was actually getting quite cold in the room and was going to put on a hoodie, but now he's going to just have to suffer.

L stood up and headed towards the thermostat, the chain between them stopping him from going any further. He turned his head at Light, giving him a knowing look before Light stumbled out of bed and followed L to the control panel by the front door.

Light felt flustered and out of control with his emotions, and he hated it.

He didn’t like how L could mess with him and his emotions so carefree… and so easily.

L took his spot in front of the bed again, happily waiting for more brushing of his hair.

Light cleared his throat and started brushing his hair again, running the brush through L’s smooth hair, his hand atop L’s head once again.

“Ooo Light-kun your hands are cold.” L said, flinching at his cold hands, a small smirk spreading across his lips. “The AC hasn’t even kicked in… I thought you were warm-”

“Shut up Ryuzaki!” Light stated defensively. “Do you want me to finish or not?!”

The frustration in his voice allowed L to basically read his mind. He knew he was flustering the younger man.

Making him blush and stutter.

“Yes, I would like that.” L said lowly, sticking his thumbnail in his mouth again.

Light huffed and continued to brush his hair, not minding being careful anymore.

The brush could catch on tangled strands, but the pain wasn’t nearly as bad as it was earlier, so L didn’t mind the loss of the hand on his head.

For that reason at least.

L realized how much he longed for human contact.

No, Light’s contact.

No, human…

L’s face contorted with thought.

Was he wanting Light’s touch? Or is this emptiness simply from the lack of human contact?

“Okay, your hair is untangled.” Light said before setting the brush and detangler back on his nightstand. “Can I go to sleep now?”

“I suppose so, even though you were the one who insisted on brushing my hair.” L said with a small smile as he stood up and actually laid in bed this time.

Light was going to argue but decided not as he turned off the lamp.

“At least I can get another hour before having to wake up again.” Light said, annoyance in his words.

#fanfic #light x l #lawlight #death note #deathnote #l x light #light yagami #l lawliet #l lawlight

[autumn-foxfire]

I'm up to episode 61 so I think it's time to watch the first movie for the series. I know they're technically not canon but I still want to watch them in a way that sort of matches the series.

I could have probably watched it sooner but I kind of got a bit too hooked on watching the series when I could XD

Isn't Conan known as Shinichi's cousin in later chapters? In fact it's Yukiko who calls him that, right? Makes sense why this movie has it so Shinichi "doesn't know" Conan and Shinichi has to pretend he's just remembered his name.

There is something to be said that Shinichi picks Ran's favourite colour because he knew it was her favourite instead of actually picking a colour that would make him happy like she intended. It's such a small lie but it's one that really does give us more insight into their relationship (yes, yes I know this is non-canon but still the non-canon movies still make there relationship dubious because that's how it's depicted in canon).

Also, she also picked a movie that is clearly something for her, for Shinichi's birthday. That would be like me picking a horror movie to watch for my boyfriend's birthday even though he doesn't like them but I love them. It's inconsiderate. These are such basic romantic gestures and even the writing team can't get them right.

Maybe you wouldn't have to worry about turning Ran down if you had just told her the truth and then you two could have gone together without all the goddamn hiding but nooooooo.

Shinichi, that probably wasn't the best way to tell kids they were playing with a bomb but I get it, you were panicked.

One of the many times being Conan has actually helped him with criminals, everyone underestimates him as a child.

Awww, Shinichi caring about the property he stole even though he did it for good, what a good boy. Shinichi you also haven't done anything good for your rep by letting "Conan" handle the bombs XD

I do love how protective the movies make Kogoro of Conan. Even if he's also still pretty arrogant about it.

LMAO I forgot the Detective Boys just keep getting near the bombs by complete accident.

Sonoko, please go, you'd be a better date for Ran than Shinichi will ever be.

The train bombs is such a good moment in the movie. Just the tenseness of them not knowing if Shinichi is right as they divert the trains. How all the employees conducts themselves to help and the relief and celebration when they succeed. It just's really good. It's something the movies do really well.

The fact that Kogoro is actually on the right track but came to the wrong conclusion T-T

That poster art looked really, really bad. Ran are you sure you want to see this movie. Maybe it's a good thing the building gets blown up.

Symmetry is overrated-

As an artist, I totally understand the urge to get rid of old work you don't want anyone to see anymore, so mood. I too, would blow up a building to get rid of them.

Don't you just hate it when your detonator has no batteries because a gremlin stole them?

Megure treating Shiratori as his pokemon: "Shiratori attack!"

Ran's dead. I'm sorry, she got crushed. There goes Shinichi's love interest.

They really just let Shinichi run off with the bomb schematics, didn't they T-T

Yes, Ran, Shinichi is incredibly unreliable to you and doesn't trust you so WHY DO YOU LIKE HIM?!

Ran, it has a clock on it, what do you fucking think it is?! Shinichi did not have to tell you that. Come on girl, you're both "in love" with and live with a detective, you can't be this dumb.

Sorry that was mean, she is in a tense situation. I apologise Ran, that was unnecessary.

Shinichi don't call her an idiot! SHE'S DISARMING A BOMB. Yes I do realise I am a hypocrite.

It's a good thing Ran is a hopeless romantic that Shinichi does not deserve at all.

There's no red thread because you two are terrible for each other <3

#dcmk #foxy's dcmk commentary