prettiestpapiperalta
“ Jacob Peralta? i’d hit that” - Elle (me)
elle. but honestly just boyle.
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debbie is my new favourite charac and that's on periodt luv
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You cant convince me that the Brooklyn Nine-Nine fandom isn’t just a secret Taylor Swift appreciation club
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Hey there! I'm looking for a group of b99 lovers to make a group chat with, but it's not going well so far... Would you like to help make/join a group? 😊
I would love to make one! :) anyone can join just dm me :)
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oh baby baby!- kid centre drabble prompts
Hi! Okay so i made this lists specifically for me to write about Peraltiago (please leave me suggestion, please I need this) but everyone/ anyone feel like using this list have at it :)
1. “Wait, you want kids?”
2. “Awww look how cute this baby is!”
3. “I’m late”
4. “You used protection right?”
5. “I don’t think I’ll ever want a baby”
6. “Um, why is there a pregnancy test in the trash can?”
7. “I’m pregnant”
8. “Get that pee stick away from me!”
9. “What do two lines mean?”
10. “How much do you want to bet the babies a girl”
11. “Its a…”
12. “Wow is that the heartbeat?”
13. “Wait is that an arm or a head or a body?” (for an ultrasound)
14. “Look at the baby bump!”
15. “Woah babe, is your stomach moving?”
16. “We are not naming our child that!”
17. “Can I touch the bump?”
18. “I’m as big as a whale!”
19. “Woah babe, you’re huge!”
20. “You know what I’m craving…”
21. “This is going to be a crazy baby shower”
22. “Not if it’s my kid, it’s not”
23. “My feet hurt”
24. “I can’t fit into any of my pants”
25. “I just can’t stop sobbing”
26. “Thank god it was just a false call”
27. “I think my water just broke”
28. “I’m never having another kid”
29. “Come on, just push, I believe in you!”
30. “What do you mean you forgot the hospital bag!?”
31. “Woah, I just had a baby…”
32. “Im a mom!” / “I’m a dad!”
33. “It’s your turn to feed the baby”
34. “There name is *insert name*
35. “Holy shit i have a baby”
36. “No-one will ever hurt you kid”
37. “I love you so much right now”
38. “He/She is perfect”
39. “So will you be the Godparents?”
40. “Im so scared im going to fuck this up”
41. “I love baby clothes”
42. “We need to go shopping again?”
43. “Did you hear that?”
44. “Say mama / dada”
45. “Haha i made her/him laugh!”
46 “I cannot believe that was her/his first word”
47. “No don’t say that! Thats a no-no word!”
48. “You’re so stinking adorable”
49. “Your mom/dad is not going to be happy…”
50. “Did she just walk”
51. “It’s dangerous with her/him crawling around every where”
52. “ how are you so fast?”
53. “Just let me call the babysitter one last time..”
54. “Do we look alike?”
55. “Maybe we should go home”
56. “Hey, youre okay”
57. “Mommy/daddy tell me a story”
58. “Its bath time!”
59.”where’s *name’s* Favourite toy?”
60. “Youre going to look so cute when im done with your hair, baby”
61. “If i kiss it will it feel better?”
62. “Stop crying now!”
63. “Hey babe, *name* is having a tantrum? What do i do?”
64. “Wow this is such a good drawing! What is it?”
65. “You got to eat it”
66. “Yeah I’ll play with you”
67. “I am now princess daddy”
68. “You’re just a little mommies/daddies girl/boy, huh!”
69. “Im sorry i cant help”
70. “Watch it again?”
71. “Im a bad mom/dad”
72. “Im so scare of being a dad/mom”.
73. “They (the kid) fell asleep in the bed”
74. “I’ll take care of you, the flu is no big deal”
75. “They (kid) wanted to cuddle”
76. “ Like parent, like baby”
77. “Its your birthday!”
78. “Surprise daddy/mommy!”
79. Holidays: Christmas/ Chanukah/ Halloween/ thanksgiving
80. “Dont freak out but i think (kid name) just broke something”
81. “I fell off my bike”
82. “Im pregnant… again”
83. “I want another kid”
84. “(Kid name) doesnt want to be an older sibling”
85. “It’s not just one (baby)…”
86. “(Kid) said that they hate me”
87. “No I’ll never be my father/mother”
88. “I juSt want one normal day”
89. “They (kid) told me i was there favourite”
90. “No i dont have a favourite child”
91. “So how was the first day!”
92. “Oh okay so a normal day of school then”
93. “Mommy im a big girl/boy now”
94. “I love you mommy/daddy”
95. “Shhhh youre my baby”
96. “That was the best recital ever!”
97. “Youre homework is too hard”
98. “Mom, dad, I have a boyfriend/girlfriend/s.o”
99. “No one can hurt you”
100. “Im a cool mom/dad”
101. “Just shut up!”
102. “I hope youre happy!”
103. “I want to be more like you”
104. “How do I change a diaper!”
105. “Yeah im a pretty good mom/dad”
106. “No more fighting”
107. “Just do the freaking dishes”
108. “I love you all evenly”
109. “Yeah i made that”
110. “But the kids want a dog so badd!”
111. “You’re being a brat”
112. “Im so proud of you”
113. “You’ll alwaya be my baby”
114. “That’s it, Youre grounded for a month”
115. “She/ he hit their little sister/brother”
116. “You got suspended?!”
117. “Im gonna kill him/her”
118. “But the daddy, daughter dance is tonight!”
119. “Her/his forehead is warm, babe”
120. “Its 3 am… what do you want?”
121. “Im not teaching you how it kiss a boy”
122. “Dad/Mom did it!”
123. “I want peanut butter and onions and i want them now”
124. “Did you take *name* out of school?”
125. “There is a baby growing in me right now…”
126 “mmm i dont want to make *name* get a shot
127. “I cant move *name* is sleeping on me”
128. “No sex ever again”
129. “Our poor kid has the weirdest uncles and aunts”
130. “I hate that im the stricked parent”
131. “Why does it looks like you have a whole circus in your hair?”
132. “I have to take *kid* to work with me”
133. “We’re going to the er”
134. “*name* teacher wants a confrince”
135. “Do you think something is wrong with *kid name*”.
136. “God you’re just like your mom/dad”
137. “I miss when you were a baby”
138. “Did you cut your hair on your own?”
139. “She/ he drank my coffee and now she’s/ he’a bouncing off the wall”
140. “Why cant i bond with them?”
141. Your own :)
Please suggust some!
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Will you write prompt #58??
Hi, Yes, of course, thank you! If anyone else wants to request anything, hit me up, I’d greatly appreciate it :)
#58: “You’re never this quiet, What’s wrong?”
When Jake had first become a detective, he thought that he was probably the most earnestly invested in what he did. After all, he worked the job he had been dreaming about since he was a kid and god he loved what he did.
‘How could anyone be more into this than me?!’ Was a constant thought that ran through his head throughout the entirety of his first years getting perps.
Then the one Ms Amy Santiago joined the nine-nine and Peralta was thrown through a loop as he considered if it even looked like he loved his job anymore.
Fast forward a few years, he ended up marrying that very adamant detective and the two acted as a crime-stopping super-team.
Their equal love for what they did mean a lot of over-time and personal hours invested in their cases, making it all that much harder to find time for one another.
Some times, just sometimes, however, all the stars seemed to aline and Jake and Amy found themselves with time to bond and hang out like a married couple should.
It was late into the afternoon and the couple had accomplished all that they needed to do, eat breakfast, take a shower, and get up. not in that order.
Now the two laid on their couch, watching the T.V. Usually, Amy was pretty against watching the t.v. as she found it: “pointless and a waste of precious time I could be organising something or making something that Holt would appreciate” But Jake and his magical reasoning skills were able to convince her otherwise that afternoon.
What that really meant was that he basically just promised that they could watch the Smithsonian channel and she could organise those binder tabs that she had been meaning to do.
She agreed the second organisation was mentioned.
So there the couple laid on the couch lazily, to each their own.
Jake, not at all interested on whatever history mumbo-jumbo the fancy speaking old man was saying on the tv, instead he equally divided his attention to trolling through Diehard chat rooms, trying to snoop the possibility of another movie being made, and starring Amy.
The second wasn’t intentional. It was just he could see her from his peripheral vision, and she was so cute as she tried to manically fix her binder collection, Jake couldn’t stop looking.
“You haven’t talked in like thirty minutes and in all the time that I’ve known you, you’ve talked through every single movie we’ve ever seen, including the aeroplane safety videos which is crazy if you ask me,” Amy looked In Jake’s direction, rearranging the pile of dividers laying in her lap. “You're never this quiet, what’s wrong?”
“No nothings wrong, I was just thinking” He cleared his throat.
Any gave him an incredulous look, Moving her supplies on the coffee table in front of her. “Okay, you never think, what’s the matter?”
Jake just sighs, knowing his cover was blown he looks down at his hands “No nothing is wrong Ames, it's just, I was actually thinking... thinking about us,”
Amy’s heart dropped to the pit of her stomach he seemed so calm, so calm it was troublesome. She adjusted her posture so that she was sitting more professionally, she didn't want to give any tells of her worry “Thinking about what?”
“About how much I love you and how perfect our life is,”
Amy’s tense shoulders dropped as she felt her heart swell, a little ‘aww’ escaped her lip as she leaned over to kiss him.
“I love you too,” she said against his lips, moving so that their foreheads rested against one another as the tone in her voice completely changed “We should turn off the tv-”
“Uhuh” Jake’s voice followed, his eyes lighting up in excited curiosity
“Change into something a little different,”
“Uhuh”
“And go get some ice cream from the new place across the street!”
Jake jumped up from the couch like a little kid, “Hell yeah! God I love you so much, babe”
#b99#brooklyn nine nine#amy santiago#jake x amy#andysamberg#amyxjake#jakeperalta#peraltiago#b99fluff#b99 headcanons#nbcb99#writing prompt#ellewrites
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nbc can have my soul at this point
the b99 fandom in 2019
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I just want someone to love me as much as boyle loves jake 🥺🥺
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oh baby baby!- kid centre drabble prompts
Hi! Okay so i made this lists specifically for me to write about Peraltiago (please leave me suggestion, please I need this) but everyone/ anyone feel like using this list have at it :)
1. “Wait, you want kids?”
2. “Awww look how cute this baby is!”
3. “I’m late”
4. “You used protection right?”
5. “I don’t think I’ll ever want a baby”
6. “Um, why is there a pregnancy test in the trash can?”
7. “I’m pregnant”
8. “Get that pee stick away from me!”
9. “What do two lines mean?”
10. “How much do you want to bet the babies a girl”
11. “Its a...”
12. “Wow is that the heartbeat?”
13. “Wait is that an arm or a head or a body?” (for an ultrasound)
14. “Look at the baby bump!”
15. “Woah babe, is your stomach moving?”
16. “We are not naming our child that!”
17. “Can I touch the bump?”
18. “I’m as big as a whale!”
19. “Woah babe, you’re huge!”
20. “You know what I’m craving...”
21. “This is going to be a crazy baby shower”
22. “Not if it's my kid, it's not”
23. “My feet hurt”
24. “I can't fit into any of my pants”
25. “I just can't stop sobbing”
26. “Thank god it was just a false call”
27. “I think my water just broke”
28. “I’m never having another kid”
29. “Come on, just push, I believe in you!”
30. “What do you mean you forgot the hospital bag!?”
31. “Woah, I just had a baby...”
32. “Im a mom!” / “I’m a dad!”
33. “It’s your turn to feed the baby”
34. “There name is *insert name*
35. “Holy shit i have a baby”
36. “No-one will ever hurt you kid”
37. “I love you so much right now”
38. “He/She is perfect”
39. “So will you be the Godparents?”
40. “Im so scared im going to fuck this up”
41. “I love baby clothes”
42. “We need to go shopping again?”
43. “Did you hear that?”
44. “Say mama / dada”
45. “Haha i made her/him laugh!”
46 “I cannot believe that was her/his first word”
47. “No don’t say that! Thats a no-no word!”
48. “You’re so stinking adorable”
49. “Your mom/dad is not going to be happy...”
50. “Did she just walk”
51. “It’s dangerous with her/him crawling around every where”
52. “ how are you so fast?”
53. “Just let me call the babysitter one last time..”
54. “Do we look alike?”
55. “Maybe we should go home”
56. “Hey, youre okay”
57. “Mommy/daddy tell me a story”
58. “Its bath time!”
59.”where’s *name’s* Favourite toy?”
60. “Youre going to look so cute when im done with your hair, baby”
61. “If i kiss it will it feel better?”
62. “Stop crying now!”
63. “Hey babe, *name* is having a tantrum? What do i do?”
64. “Wow this is such a good drawing! What is it?”
65. “You got to eat it”
66. “Yeah I’ll play with you”
67. “I am now princess daddy”
68. “You’re just a little mommies/daddies girl/boy, huh!”
69. “Im sorry i cant help”
70. “Watch it again?”
71. “Im a bad mom/dad”
72. “Im so scare of being a dad/mom”.
73. “They (the kid) fell asleep in the bed”
74. “I’ll take care of you, the flu is no big deal”
75. “They (kid) wanted to cuddle”
76. “ Like parent, like baby”
77. “Its your birthday!”
78. “Surprise daddy/mommy!”
79. Holidays: Christmas/ Chanukah/ Halloween/ thanksgiving
80. “Dont freak out but i think (kid name) just broke something”
81. “I fell off my bike”
82. “Im pregnant... again”
83. “I want another kid”
84. “(Kid name) doesnt want to be an older sibling”
85. “It’s not just one (baby)...”
86. “(Kid) said that they hate me”
87. “No I’ll never be my father/mother”
88. “I juSt want one normal day”
89. “They (kid) told me i was there favourite”
90. “No i dont have a favourite child”
91. “So how was the first day!”
92. “Oh okay so a normal day of school then”
93. “Mommy im a big girl/boy now”
94. “I love you mommy/daddy”
95. “Shhhh youre my baby”
96. “That was the best recital ever!”
97. “Youre homework is too hard”
98. “Mom, dad, I have a boyfriend/girlfriend/s.o”
99. “No one can hurt you”
100. “Im a cool mom/dad”
101. “Just shut up!”
102. “I hope youre happy!”
103. “I want to be more like you”
104. “How do I change a diaper!”
105. “Yeah im a pretty good mom/dad”
106. “No more fighting”
107. “Just do the freaking dishes”
108. “I love you all evenly”
109. “Yeah i made that”
110. “But the kids want a dog so badd!”
111. “You’re being a brat”
112. “Im so proud of you”
113. “You’ll alwaya be my baby”
114. “That’s it, Youre grounded for a month”
115. “She/ he hit their little sister/brother”
116. “You got suspended?!”
117. “Im gonna kill him/her”
118. “But the daddy, daughter dance is tonight!”
119. “Her/his forehead is warm, babe”
120. “Its 3 am... what do you want?”
121. “Im not teaching you how it kiss a boy”
122. “Dad/Mom did it!”
123. “I want peanut butter and onions and i want them now”
124. “Did you take *name* out of school?”
125. “There is a baby growing in me right now...”
126 “mmm i dont want to make *name* get a shot
127. “I cant move *name* is sleeping on me”
128. “No sex ever again”
129. “Our poor kid has the weirdest uncles and aunts”
130. “I hate that im the stricked parent”
131. “Why does it looks like you have a whole circus in your hair?”
132. “I have to take *kid* to work with me”
133. “We’re going to the er”
134. “*name* teacher wants a confrince”
135. “Do you think something is wrong with *kid name*”.
136. “God you’re just like your mom/dad”
137. “I miss when you were a baby”
138. “Did you cut your hair on your own?”
139. “She/ he drank my coffee and now she’s/ he’a bouncing off the wall”
140. “Why cant i bond with them?”
141. Your own :)
Please suggust some!
#b99headcannon#b99season7#brooklyn nine nine#b99#baby#b99fluff#b99oneshot#b99fanfic#b99drabble#amyxjake#jakeperalta#amy santiago#peraltiago#prompt#writing#writing ideas#drabble#prompt list#writing prompt
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Hiii! How are you? Can you please write about Peraltiago with prompts 15; 112 and 134 please? That would make me realllyyyy happy 🥰🥰 also, I’ve tried to join groups about peraltiago with my other account but I didn’t succeed, I think I’m bad at it
Hi! I’m good now that you’ve requested that I write something! I’m like so excited to write this yeeee! I also have no clue how to work tumblr my dood so I’m sorry, I can’t be of much help. But anyway, I’m going to do each of these individually, and I’ll link them on this post when I write them :).
But for now, here is 15 :)
#15: “You’re breaking my heart, babe”.
Jake paced up and down the narrow hallway of the precinct, occasionally looking up to see fellow detectives pass him in the hall.
To say that he was excited would be an understatement, he was beyond thrilled and his constant moving was an obvious sign of that fact.
The nine-nine had been understaffed for about the last week. Rosa and Terry had been on a stakeout for the last two days, Boyle was at home. He along the likes of Genevieve and Nikolaj had all gotten a rare type of virus from some exotic bird that Jake wasn’t entirely sure he could even pronounce. All three of them were fine, but Charles still needed a few more days before he would function again.
Then there was Scully and Hitchcock, there was nothing advertently off with them, but they were as useful as the chairs they sat in, if not less.
The lack of bodies seemed to be the main concern of Captain Holt who was basically forced to pawn his caseloads on other precincts, Jake, on the contrary, was beyond thrilled.
The lack of detectives made it all the easier for Jake to convince Holt to let his beautiful and brilliant wife help him on an undercover drug bust.
So there Jake stood, almost skipping in the hall, waiting for Amy to come out of the bathroom in the outfit he had chosen for her undercover personality to rock.
“Jake...” The unsure voice of Amy rang from the bathroom Being at the end of the hall when she called, Jake’s head peaked up like a little puppy as he made her way towards her.
“Are you sure this is what you want me to wear... It feels a little, um unprofessional,” With that Amy slid the door open with what was barely a crack. She leaned against the now-closed door, her body language slouched, her arms crossed in front of her like she was uncomfortable.
She had a skin-tight red dress on that was just a little too low, her hair was a curly mess that framed her face perfectly, her face caked on with more makeup then she thinks she had worn in her entire life.
Jake had to stop himself from oogling her because “damn she looked good”.
“Jake...?” Amy repeated with an annoyed tinge in her voice this time. He hasn’t been so successful in his goal, realising that he had been staring at her for the last 30 seconds.
“Um yes,” He cleared his throat, shaking his head “Yeah, you look super great”.
Amy just sighed, knowing that even though yes they did have a case, this was probably more for Jake’s entertainment and maybe that could be fun on its own.
“So, what’s the mission?”
“Pretty standard drug bust but the location is pretty trashy”
“Hint’s the outfit” She gestured down.
“Hmh”
“And the cover-up?”
“Right I’m Ron MkFlain and you’re Polly Hennaro, we’re from LA and want to buy some cocaine because the memories of the divorce and being stuck in that tower are just too much for us to handle” He smiled smugly to himself like he had just had a stroke of genius.
Amy, however, was less entertained. She just blinked at him, a deadpanned expression. “You just took the plot of the first Diehard movie and changed the first letters of the character’s names, huh?”
Jake gave a cheeky grin.
“No, absolutely not”.
This elicited a child-like whine from him “Why nootttt? You’re breaking my heart, babe!”
Amy chuckled, rolling her eyes in a friendly manner as she wrapped her arms around him, pulling Jake into a hug “I have a better idea, what if-” Her voice bounced with every word as her fingers rubbed against the fabric of her husband’s flannel “We’re Jonny and Dora Veralto? Loving husband and wife for the last 5 years?”
Jake smiled, leaning down to peak her lips quickly, afraid Holt would protest their workplace PDA, “Okay, maybe you didn’t break my heart after all”.
#b99headcannon#b99#nbcb99#brooklyn nine nine#amyxjake#jakeperalta#amy santiago#jake x amy#peraltiago#ellewrites
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prompt #80
Note: no-one asked for this. literally. No-one. but i reallly wanted to write okay 😪. anyway please go suggest a drabble for me to write & enjoy:).
“Nothing bad is going to happen baby, I promise”
“Daddy?” A small voice called from where the hallway and living room met.
Jake’s head turned sharply in his daughter’s direction the second he heard the calling.
It was later into the evening, almost ten at the time. Jake had been up, trying to wrap up a case load that he couldn’t seem to solve while simultaneously watching Diehard for the third time that week.
“What’s up, mandms?” He paused the tv screen, pushing this folders of work to the side as he stood up abruptly, walking in his child’s direction.
Almost instantaneously a smile consumed his expression. Emi leaned against the wall, a tiny yawn emerged as she attempted to rub the clear triedness from her eyes. Jake almost chuckled to himself when he saw her curly dark hair amess, and her pink pajamas shifted on her body from when he had tucked her in.
‘God,’ The father though to himself, ‘She looks so much like Ames’.
“There’s a monster in my closet! I can’t sleep when there is a monster in my room!”
Jake’s expression instantly softend, he couldn’t argue with that logic, plus this was a pretty standard routine in the Peralta household.
Like many times before, Amy, now a captain, was on mission that lasted overnight. And while Jake knew that Emi liked to spend time with him, the four year old missed her mom.
He had never dismissed Emi’s blatant attempts for attention. He knew that she was way to smart to believe in actual monsters, afterall, Amy was her mother.
But he still entertained the proclaim, plus Pimemento had actually been hidding in Emi’s closet once.
He frowned slightly, leaning down to pick the little girl up “Good thing detective daddy is on the case! Nothing bad is going to happen baby, I promise”.
Jake lightly tickled her little belly, getting the littlest giggle in response that lit up his expression.
“Look,” He plopped Emi ontop of her mattress as he made his way over to her closet.
As he turned on the flashlight of his phone with one hand, the other swung the doors open, feeling his kid eye him from bwhind with anticipation.
“No monsters, Em” He shined the lights, revealing nothing but a perfectly organised closet curtesy of a one mrs Amy Santiago- Peralta.
Emi sat down, nodding her head in what was almost defeat.
“Now let me tuck you back in because it is wayyy past your bed time and mama is going be real mad if she finds out I let you stay up this late”.
“I won’t tell her, promise,” she let out a little squeak, which was an obvious lie because she told Amy everything, “But I miss mommy” her tone became sadder.
Jake sighed, nodding his head in agreement. “Here scoot your boot”. He gestured for her to move, and of course, shed obeyed as Jake smooshed his way into her tiny twin sized bed.
Immediately, Emi clang to his side, burrowing her face into his neck.
“Hey I miss her too but mama has a very important job to do” He tried, but failed, to grasp her eyes, so he kept talking.
“We both just need to go to bed and she’ll be here in the morning, okay? Then we can all go out to get ice cream?”
He looked down to kiss her forehead, ready to get up and let her be when she nearly screamed.
“No! Daddy don’t go!”
Jake just sank back to where he was, putting an arm around his little girl “Okay cool cool cool,”
He felt as Emi was content with his answer, shifting so she could fall asleep easier.
Meanwhile Peralta laid there, staring at the ceiling and smiling like an absolute idiot.
“I won’t leave, Baby... I never will”
And he didn’t. He waited until she fell asleep, but he was soon to follow.
It sure was a nice surprise for Amy when she came hone the next morning.
#jake peralta is a dad & thats just faxs#b99oneshot#brooklyn nine nine#b99#b99fanfic#fanfic#fluff#b99fluff#amyxjake#jakeperalta#peraltiago#baby#amy santiago#prompt#b99headcannon#b99season7#brooklyn#ellewrites
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I feel like captain holt would be strongly against mock turtlenecks.
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If anyone is reading this PLEASE send me a # or two! I really just want to write about Peraltiago and maybe their babies 🥺🥺
Drabble Challenge! #1 - 150
Rules: Followers send a number to your ask and you write a drabble using that sentence/prompt in your piece. Try to keep up! Expect a TON of requests!
Take the long way around
Can you shut up for five minutes, please???
He’s been gone for quite a while
I can’t see anything.
I heard a noise.
Scary movies are for chumps.
You’ve gone to the bathroom fifty times today.
The floor is lava.
Where’s my food?
I bet you feel like an artist
Did you ever clean the attic?
Can I be of assistance?
Get out of the way before I murder you.
I think you forgot who wears the pants in this relationship
You’re breaking my heart, babe.
Cry me a river.
Build a bridge.
Get over it.
Another credit card?!
It’s just rain, you aren’t gonna melt!
When’s the last time YOU cleaned the bathroom?
I don’t know why I married you.
Have you ever lied to me?
If I trip over one more of your shoes, I’m throwing them all away.
Aren’t you supposed to be the adult?
I’m stuck! Help me!
I swear, I’m not scared.
What do you think a cupholder is for?
You know when your phone buzzes, it means I’m trying to talk to you, right?
Turn that sh*t off!!!!
When’s that last time we went on a date?
I thought you didn’t like cats?
The door’s locked.
Remember when you were a kid and you ______ (insert memory)
I’ll just tell your mom on you.
I thought you were nice.
I had a dream about you.
I work pretty hard around here, but you get all the credit
What color do you like better?
Am I your husband or your taxi service?
Take notes, sweetheart.
This is where you impress me, right?
Pick up lines only work when I’m drunk.
I can’t believe you didn’t remember
If that makes me a child, so be it.
I could beat you up, you know that right?
Would it kill you to help people?
I bet you can’t go 24 hours without cussing.
But, I said I love you.
Is it just me or is cold as hell in here?
I’m not weird, you’re just basic.
Just sleep with one eye open, that’s all I’m saying
Take off your shirt.
Why’s there a pregnancy test in the trash?
Way to go, kid.
I found the candles, we’ll be alright.
We could get struck by lightning, but you want to kiss in the rain.
You’re never this quiet, what’s wrong?
…or we could make out….
I said “I HAVE AN IDEA!”
Down the hall, second door on the left.
I warned you. He warned you. Your freaking mom warned you.
Sit still, for the love of all that is Holy.
Are you even human?
We’ll talk later.
K.
I’m afraid.
I thought there was time.
Can you just leave me alone?
I’ll carry it.
We’re not ‘fine’.
Are you really taking his side right now?
I like proving you wrong.
Girls can’t drive, plain and simple.
Who are you?
I think you need stitches
Must be a coincidence
Can you be romantic for once?
This is your fault by the way.
Nothing bad is going to happen, baby, I promise.
Excuse me for falling in love with you.
I have fans. More fans than you to be exact.
I paid for half and you ate three-quarters.
I knew you’d be mad.
If you die, I’m going to kill you.
You’ve never smoked anything in your life.
You gave me a black eye.
Stop looking at me like that, weirdo.
What if it sinks?
Birds can’t fly without wings.
Sorry I’m protective over the things I love.
That SOOO classifies as a date.
No backsies.
You’re an idiot. I married an idiot.
I never liked it, I lied.
Remember, we have to get up early tomorrow.
Are you trying to flirt? Because, you’re embarrassing yourself.
Remember when we were dating and you _____
Be brave, sweetheart.
I’m sorry, but that was adorable.
You don’t hate me, quit lying to yourself.
You hear that? That’s the sound of my awesomeness.
She’s my daughter, I can read her diary.
That’s a fact, Jack.
Actually, I couldn’t care less.
I try my best.
Doesn’t make a difference to me anyways.
I’m glad you’re mine.
You look pretty good for your age.
You passed out for like an hour.
Delete it. Now.
You’re a jerk.
Are you high?
No, you’re MY bitch.
Ew ew ew. You’re so gross.
Spare change for the poor and lonely.
She’s 6, how can she scare you?
When’s the last time we ______
He’s spoiled rotten.
I can’t stay long.
There’s nothing we can do.
Do you ever stop smiling?
Step aside and watch a pro.
Never give him stuff like that!
You’re the one who left it laying around.
I’m a lucky girl. I’ll admit that.
Teach me how to play?
It’s called a prank.
Well, you’re a prick.
Good, I hope you feel bad.
You have cold, you’re not dying.
I have reasons. You wouldn’t get it.
I hope you have a cold shower.
You don’t mean that.
Sing to me, please.
Did you enjoy yourself last night?
Why do they behave for you?
Stop making your own rules.
Don’t open an umbrella in the house.
You know what happens when you assume things.
That’s open for discussion.
Oh, what a shocker, you have an excuse.
Be serious for two minutes, please.
I cheated.
What’s the biggest lie you ever told?
Pillows are over-rated.
Zombies aren’t real, I promise.
Are we lost or do you know where we are?
We started with one and now we have seven. You have no chill.
*Make up your own*
Happy Writing! Visit @prompt-bank for more prompts!
#jake x amy#amy santiago#b99#b99headcannon#myfanfic#b99fanfic#prompt#otp#peraltiago#jakeperalta#amyxjake#rosadiaz#raymond holt#cute#opt#nbv#ninenine#brooklyn nine nine
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I hope dan goor starts season 7 of b99 with amy and jake making out, just to spite everyone who yelled at him last season for amy and jake not having one kiss.
#iseeyou dan#brooklyn nine nine#b99#b99 headcanons#b99season7#peraltiago#nbcb99#nbc#ninenine#concept#dangoor#rosadiaz#raymond holt#headcannon#jakeperalta#jake x amy#amy santiago
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B99 season 7 episodes
hi! so i haven’t seen any lists of the titles for b99 episodes in season 7 so i decided to compile a list off all the ones i could find.
i dont know if these are all accurate or what, i got them off of spoilertv :)
07.01- manhunter
07.02- captain kim
07.03- pimemento
07.04- jimmy jab game ii
07.05- debbie
07.06- trying
07.07- ding dong
07.08- the takeaway
07.09-
07.10-
07.11-
07.12-
07.13-
if you find / know of anymore pleaaseee dm me so i can add it to the list.
Thank youuu
-elle
#spoilers#brooklyn nine nine#b99#b99 headcanons#jake x amy#amy santiago#jakeperalta#peraltiago#brooklyn#ninenine#andysamberg#nbc#nbcb99#raymond holt#rosadiaz#chelsea
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Concept one: amy & jake’s first kid
amy finds out that she’s pregnant a week after the events of season six finale
jake is scared shitless but overall super excited
amy makes sure that holt is imfored immediately. even though he’s not either of their supperiors anymore, his opinion is still vidal to jake (but almost entirely amy). when he hears the news he’s stonefaced as usual “i’m jazzed, can’t you see the excitement spewing from my facial expression?” he stated to amy’s relief.
boyles finds out by accident in the bullpen after over hearing amy ask jake “can you hand me the glue? i need to feel this hole” to which he obviously responded with “title of your sex tape. waiiittt a second-“ he wiggled the superglue around “can we even have sex now? will i-“ his voice lowered to a whisper “poke the baby”. charles promptly faints. rosa sees him on the floor and pieces it together immediately, “oh damn, you’re pregnant arent you?” she asked.
right before they have a gender reveal party, jake and amy realise that both of them have totally aposing views. jake thinks the baby is a girl while amy thinks its a boy. they make a bet that whoever is right will get to name the baby. turns out jake is right and the happy couple, along with all of the precinct and kylie find out the baby is a girl.
amy’s pregnant leaves her super emotional, especially when her pant suits stop fitting her. since she’s a sargent she didnt need them for work but one low profile case that came spontaneously, jake was covering required her to wear one of jake’s shirts aka the only thing that would fit her.
jake is so psyched every time he saw his pregnant wife come up to the bullput. He always pulled her aside with him where he would talk to her belly or make sure the baby was okay
Jake always “high-fives” the bump and when the baby kicks back for the first time, he sheds a few happy tears
late into the pregnancy, amy’s cravings take over and she has a “ who can eat the grossest food combinations” contest with scully and hitchcock
terry and jake have a heart to heart once jake realised he was still terrified of becoming a dad
boyle plans the “best baby shower ever” (his words) which he had been planning for nine years (also his words). gina comes back to help him and brings iggy who promptly chooses to hang out with jake the whole night and amy gets emotional when she sees him hanging out with iggy, the realisation of how perfect of a dad he’s going to be sets in. scully and hitchcock make the party weird some how.
one night, after reading an article about it, she asks jake to put a set of headphones with classical music to enrich the babies mind, on her bump. he instead plays diehard on a loop.
boyles constantly mentions how nikolaj could potentially date jake’s daughter and they could finally be family and jake could be a part of the boyle clan!
before his daughter was born, jake runs into a case with doug judy (where charles mentions that he was the one who through the baby shower) and judy wishes jake the best of luck and leaves him with a bunch of baby supplies
amy and jake order their crib from a company called very good
at the end of season seven, amy joins jake in a low profile, and relatively safe stakeout as she wants to do a fun job before she takes her maternity leave. jake was really hesitant about her joining especially being only a week and a half from her due date but figures that they’re just going to be in a hotel room.
they are in a nice hotel and terry and rosa are also there, on a completely different mission.
on the rosa/terry mission, their guy puts off a bomb which explodes with drugs meaning everyone is stuck in the hotel
turns out that the “bomb” was a cover up for amy and jake’s guy who promptly escapes
fortunately, amy and jake were very far away from the accident. unfortunately, amy’s water breaks and she goes into labour stuck in the hotel
it was a complicated and tiring several hour birth on amy’s half and jake cant stop pacing even though terry is trying to calm him
rosa is the one that delivers the perfectly healthy baby to a very tired amy in a random hotel room.
as promised, jake is the one who gets to name the baby. amy expects something dumb and calls him dad for the first time when she looked down at her daughter and said “baby im sorry but daddy is going to name you something stupid” he can’t stop grinning at his new title.
instead of what amy was expecting, a diehard theme name, he suggests the name Emilia. jake says that he has always liked that name and thought it was cute, he also snuck his way into amy’s baby name book and saw she circled it so he thought it was perfect. “oh and we can call her emi! i have my two dream girls now! amy and emi!”. amy instantaneously agrees with his choise.
emi’s middle name is rose as picked by amy. inspired by the woman who helped her come into the world. rosa cried a little when she was told the baby was named after her
boyles fainted when he saw emi, once he regained consciousnesses he started comparing everything he could, drawing out every single similarity between his best friend and new his daughter.
after she was born, jake’s desk is litered with pictures of her. he also ahows the perps he catches pictures of emi he carries in his wallet from time to time because he’s so proud of his little girl.
emi laughs for the first time after jake shows the baby the video of the screaming goat
as emi grew up she called everyone in the precinct her aunts and uncles and (once again) captain holt, ‘gampa ray’ and ‘gampa kevin’ because after all they were the little girls godfathers. boyles suggused on a million occasions how he wanted to be emi’s god mother.
one night when emi was a few months old, amy overheard jake rocking his daughter saying “i promise i’ll always be here and never be like my dad, kiddo”.
Jake developed a very bad habit of calling himself “daddy” and amy “mommy” absentmindedly. this only becomes apparent to the squad when jake says to amy “can you get me some coffee, mommy?” which makes everyone uncomfortable.
when she grew up, emi had curly brown hair, the same as her father, and the sweetest, most intising brown eyes. she was super smart like her mom, but more in a troubling michevious way. She was a good mix of being super goofy and chill with an underlying maturity and seriousness that made her a unique child.
while she loved her mom to pieces, Emi was a diehard (ahaha) daddy’s girl and completely adored him especially since Amy got off of work later than him, emi and jake bonded alot.
but not as much as peralta loved and adored her.
#brooklyn#b99 fanfic#b99 headcanons#b99memes#b99#amy santiago#jake x amy#jakeperalta#baby#firstpost#concept#fanfic#myfanfic#headcannon#melissa#andysamberg#peraltiago#rosadiaz#raymond holt#brooklyn nine nine#ninenine
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