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#American watches German TV

neroushalvaus · 5 months

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Tumblr in the 60s – Part 2

Part 1 / Deleted Scenes

💁🏼‍♀️brigittebardots Follow

anyone want to get fake married so i can get the pill to slut around

💋 marrymetwiggy Follow

Just say you have painful monthlies, I heard it works if you have a nice doctor!

💫 treatmetendermaureen Follow

Remember you still should use the sheet whenever possible. Stay safe ♡

1087 notes

♒ let-the-sunshine-in Follow

i think there's something wrong with me, i'm just so sleepy all the time, it's not fair

👭 marvelettesofficial Follow

That's because you spend all your nights listening to radio luxembourg

♒ let-the-sunshine-in Follow

i heard nothing last night so i built an antenna out of poultry net, iron wire and bits of tin. i cut my fingers and our family chickens ran away

☁️ ankin-vaimo Follow

A small price to pay for some music.

♒ let-the-sunshine-in Follow

the antenna fell apart before the german guy stopped talking

34 notes

🗣 ilovejohnlennon-deactivated19660729

me: chilling

my brain: if you were shot and weren't sure whether you'd live or die should you call the cops to make sure your murderer gets caught or call the ambulance to increase your chance of survival

me: what

🗣 elviskneesofficial-deactivated19631119

There should be a number that'd reach both of those

🕺 elvisherselvis Follow

That number already exists. It's been used in my city for like a two decades.

🏆 petebest-or-bust Follow

🕺 elvisherselvis Follow

Fuck you I'm British.

🪛 patrickwhoghton Follow

Oh my G, this post from -62 sounds so prophetic now that they're trying to make the 911 thing catch on, where's that jagger meme

🖖 spock-in-tardis Follow

🕺 elvisherselvis Follow

This is literally not gift of prophecy. I told you back when this post was first made that this number has already existed in UK for years. It was obviously going to spread elsewhere, even US was bound to catch on at some point.

🏆 petebest-or-bust Follow

you are still here?? keeping an eye on this post??

💋 marrymetwiggy Follow

you're so grumpy @elvisherselvis maybe you should phone the emergency number and get a wahhh-mbulance

98,9 t. notes

📼 bisexualbarbaradane Follow

my date: Oh I listen to folk as well!

me: That's so cool! Who are your favourites?

my date: I'm sooo into Bob Dylan.

me:

my date: Is everything okay?

me, stuffing jelly babies into my purse: I have to go, like, right now, immediately, sorry

#it's okay if you liked dylan before he became the judas he is #but you can't call yourself a folk fan if you still support him #ugghh i hate him #electric guitar using lil bitch #sigh #jelly baby meme #bob dylan critical // #anti bob dylan // #bob dylan hate //

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🛸 premisendgame Follow

Cock and balls, I'm watching this previously banned american film where an american man is trying to fuck a soviet spy (played by famously very russian Greta Garbo) by offering her champagne and he is like "have you never had champagne?" and Greta is like "never 🥺 only goat's milk and a ration of vodka in the army" and the tv screen freezed and was like "ERROR!! CHAMPAGNE HAS BEEN SERVED IN SOVIET UNION SINCE 1936" I'm 😂😂😂

🪐 stalincredible Follow

You Americans will say anything to make Soviet stuff look silly

🛸 premisendgame Follow

Where do you think I am watching soviet tv from?? Or did I miss the memo where americans have the monopoly on joking about their own damn country??

322 notes

🥁 ringoforpresident Follow

"In future there will be telephones you can take with you anywhere" I can't even fucking listen to Radio Luxembourg without building a goddamn satellite, sending it to space, reciting spells and prayers, and sticking the radio out of the window at 2am EET. And even then it needs to be snowing for it to work because the radio wave fairies like snow or some shit

♒ let-the-sunshine-in Follow

preach

540 notes

#this probably won't be very popular because some of these are very niche but i had fun #is the radio luxembourg station being impossible to listen to an universal experience?#i feel like older people in finland have a permanent chip on their shoulder because listening to it was so hard #there is a possibility ninotchka is doing a little time travel here; i remember this corrected version was shown at some point #but it may have been later #anyway just enjoy the ride #tumblr in the 60s #1960s #dashboard simulator #fake dashboard #60s #unreality

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girlactionfigure · 1 month

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THURSDAY HERO: Helmut Kleinicke

Helmut Kleinicke was a German engineer who supervised construction projects at Auschwitz while saving Jews from the gas chambers.

Born in 1907, Helmut grew up in the forest of Lower Saxony – literally. His parents were forest rangers. Helmut studied civil engineering and joined the Nazi party in 1933. In 1941, right after getting married, Helmut was hired to join the team planning the construction of Auschwitz concentration camp. He moved to Chrzanow, Poland to work on the project.

In Chrzanow, Helmut was ordered to select local Jews who were young and healthy to work on the construction site. He treated them well and didn’t allow the SS to harass them. One survivor remembered, “Those of us who worked for Kleinicke were like VIPs. We had a certificate that we worked for him, and that was our insurance policy.”

When he heard about plans to round up local Jews, Helmut located every person on the list and warned them they were about to be arrested. Then he transported many of them to the border and helped them escape. Others he hid in his attic and basement. Helmut didn’t keep track of the Jews he saved, but it’s estimated there were hundreds.

By late 1943, the higher-ups at Auschwitz noticed that Jews who interacted with Helmut kept disappearing. He was removed from his job and drafted to an artillery unit, then sent to the front lines. When Germany surrendered in 1945, Helmut was arrested by the British because of his membership in the Nazi party. While he was in prison, Jews he had saved submitted affidavits testifying that he had rescued them “without regard to his person” and that many Jews owed their lives to Helmut Kleinicke. He was exonerated in 1949. For the rest of his life, he did not talk about his wartime activities. He told his daughter only that he’d saved some Jews, but wished he’d saved more. He never considered himself a hero. In 1979, the American miniseries “Holocaust” aired on German TV. Helmut watched it and was deeply shaken. Three days after that he had a stroke from which he never recovered. He died a few months later.

Helmut’s heroism was unknown until recently. In a 2015 documentary, Josef Konigsberg, an Auschwitz survivor, testified that Helmut Kleinicke saved his life by pulling him out of a line of people being deported. This interview, and corroborating evidence that Helmut had saved many Jewish lives, led to Helmut Kleinicke being honored posthumously as Righteous Among the Nations by Israeli Holocaust Memorial Yad Vashem. The ceremony was held at the Israeli Embassy in Berlin, and was attended by Helmut’s daughter Juta Scheffzek. Also in attendance was Josef Konigsberg, who told his story of being rescued by Helmut. “I owe him my life,” said Josef, describing how Helmut rescued him from a transport line to Auschwitz: “My mother came and begged him to rescue me. Kleinicke grabbed me and said that I was his best worker.” Josef’s mother and sister were not so lucky and both died in the gas chamber. Crying as he addressed Juta, Josef said, “This is one of the most beautiful days of my life. Thank you, thank you.”

Juta was deeply touched. “It verified what my father said to me in very few words – and I never knew if he had been telling the truth.” She told the Times of Israel after the ceremony, “It was a very long and emotional search to discover the truth about my father, and I hope that people in America, the UK and Israel will hear about it.”

Israeli Ambassador to Germany Jeremy Issacharoff, who hosted the event honoring Helmut, commented, “When you’re in the context of Germany, you’re never free of the historical dimension of the Holocaust, and it’s a very heavy burden to bear for the Germans, and also obviously for the Jewish people, and it’s always there. And I think it’s really important that this type of ceremony also recognizes that there were a few really important people who did the right thing. And that, to me, is the main message that should come out of this.”

For saving Jews while his peers were killing them, we honor Helmut Kleinicke as this week’s Thursday Hero.

#Thursday Hero

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transgenderer · 3 months

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Walking thry the park at 3 am (shot cut) I felt scared ut morso quickly hankering for a fight more than.snxe I was 10 and angry from watching TV (TV always made me mad. Add?) m anyway I knew thaeae stupid German bitches as weren't ready for an American I'd bite thwienfosssakn jugulars. Kept feeling my teeth with my tongue and swapping my hands between middle fingers and fists for punching. I'd go cNpre upon this mfs. Just you wait

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mrsparrasblog · 15 days

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Highschool AU pt.2

Summary: You and your Brother moved away from Austria because of your parents Divorce, making you attend Northbridge Academy in Exeter, England. On your first day you meet the bullied Simon Riley and the overly extroverted John MacTavish. As if dealing with puberty, sports and your grades wasn't hard enough you fell in love not only with your Bestfriend Simon but also with Johnny, that Johnny was in love with both of you didn't make the Dynamic better

Pt.1

November 1990

As the days passed, you fell into a comfortable routine. You made a point to sit next to Simon in every class, despite Johnny's attempts to claim the seat besides you. You got used to Johnny though; he was funny and surprisingly smart. He even beat you in physics once, which made you incredibly mad. You always wanted to excel in academics; sometimes it felt like it was the only thing you were good at—getting good grades. If you couldn't be good at that, what special thing would be left in you?

"Lizzie, it's just an A, who cares if it's not an A+? You won't die from it," Simon nagged. He never understood your drive to excel in school. He wasn’t bad himself, though; he mostly got Bs, especially in math, history, and chemistry. He had some Cs in English and Housekeeping —claiming it was unimportant for him that he did poorly in sewing. He was right, though; that's why you didn’t pick that incredibly dumb subject and chose advanced German instead, which was like a free pass for you. Unfortunately, you were in the same class as John, the annoying new friend of your brother. He was always so flirty, although he was cute.

"How do you know? Maybe I'll fall dead on the ground in the next second."

"Would be a blessing for some of us," Simon replied. After a few weeks of school, you were surprised to find out that Simon wasn’t like he looked. He wasn’t shy and uncomfortable; he pulled lots of jokes—bad ones—next to you. Worse, his humor was dry and mean, making you chuckle all the time, which he secretly loved.

"You're an idiot, Si."

"And still, I'm your favorite, Lizzie."

"Only because Johnny isn’t a real challenge to you."

"Don’t let Johnny hear that; he will be mad."

"Maybe he needs a bit of an ego shrink," You laughed.

Simon and you walked towards your table. It was like in all those American movies you watched when you were allowed to watch TV. Tiffany and her squad had their own table, and then there were tables full of footballers where Kyle sat most of the time, except when Johnny begged him to sit with you. Michael, like the perfect big brother he was, was always where you were. And where Michael was, John and sometimes Nik would be, if he didn’t spend 90% of his time in detention.

Every Thursday was mail delivery day, the best part of the week. You always looked forward to a letter from Dad. He told you about all the different places he visited for work, and there was always a postcard in the letter. You had over 120 postcards, all placed on the wall of your dorm. At least that made you feel at home. Northbridge Academy wasn’t as bad as you feared at the beginning. The teachers were great, the school was fun, and you had Simon and Johnny. The only downside was my dorm mates. While the boys were more than lucky despite Si complaining about Michael's snoring, they still had a nice group. Meanwhile, you were stuck with Tiffany, Laurie, and Anne in a room, and it was even worse than you imagined.

Simon opened his mail, and his expression changed. He tried to regain his composure quickly, but he couldn't fool me. You knew something was up, so you poked him under the table, trying to get his mail. Surprisingly, he gave it to you without any further resistance, and for once, You wished he hadn’t.

Hello Simon, Im on a camping trip with your Mom and Thomas. Don´t bother coming over the long weekend. We wont be there. Stay at your trust fund school. Dad

"Si—"

"No, Lizzie." He stood up and left the table, surprising everyone else who hadn’t noticed anything. Typical boys. You followed him into his dorm and sat next to him on the bed.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"It's not a big deal, Lizzie. They're just on vacation."

"Is it?"

"Lizzie."

"You know you could come with Mich and me. Mom wouldn’t mind at all; she loves hosting people and all that stuff. We can spend more time together, and you don’t need to stay in this musty room—like, really, do you boys even clean?" You laughed at the chaos of the room. Everywhere, there were paint stains, football shoes, and, on what you guessed was Nik’s and John’s bed, an E-guitar was placed.

"Lizzie, it’s okay. You know I can practice a bit before the start of ice hockey season."

"Pleaseeeeeeee." You looked at him with puppy eyes. I needed him to come with me.

"Okay, but only this once." He agreed, and you gave him a big bear hug.

SIMONS POV

"Whit dae ye mean ye gang hame wi' Ellie?"

"Was invited," I said shortly.

"Was invited too," John chimed in, while he tuned his guitar, making noises not safe for humanity.

"How come is a' body invited 'cept me?" Johnny started to whine. The answer would be easy for anyone with eyes: she doesn’t like his flirting, she is scared of things like this, and asking her to marry him after she gave him a cookie wasn’t the smartest choice.

"I wasn’t invited," Kyle replied shortly.

"You're not invited, Johnny, 'cause ye need to tone it down with my sister. She is only 13; she doesn’t care about boys right now. And asking her at any chance if she wants to marry you makes her scared. Ye don’t know anything about girls, do ye?" That was the most words I've heard from König since, well, ever, but he was right. Johnny needed to tone it down. I didn’t like how Lizzie felt insecure whenever he did it and clung to me. The truth is Lizzie wasn’t afraid of him or anything; she even liked Johnny as a friend. She just thought his advances were jokes. Johnny liked to joke a lot, giving him the reputation of a class clown. And so, his big gestures for her felt like a joke to her, especially since she was so insecure at heart. I just never understood why? She was smart, funny, much cooler than any other girl, and she was pretty, not that I would ever tell that to someone.

"Just trying to be good, König," Johnny muttered.

"If ye weren’t a lovesick little puppy, he’d probably punch you into oblivion," John mentioned.

"You can come too, Johnny," König replied, still giving him the big brother glance.

"Sweet."

"Wait, how do we all fit in a car?" I asked, afraid that Johnny would take my place, and I needed to stay here. But everyone just looked at me weirdly, and I didn’t know why.

The next day, on our way to Lizzie's house, I finally knew why. There was a fucking limousine with black windows, probably bulletproof, like in James Bond movies. A small man in his 50s walked outside of the car wearing a black suit and smiling as he walked towards Lizzie, taking her baggage from her hands.

"He doesn’t look like Lizzie’s Dad," I said. It was true; they didn’t look similar, but still, she hugged him like you’d hug a family member, I guess?

John started to laugh. "You really don’t know a lot about Beth." Beth? Why did he call my Lizzie Beth? That was a shitty name.

"I know a lot about her."

"Not about her world, little one." I hated it when people reduced me for my small frame. I didn’t want to be the skinny short boy walking behind Lizzie all the time in need of her support. At least she didn’t see me that way.

"Si, John, Johnny, that’s Alfred, he is our family, Butler," Lizzie said, smiling at Alfred like he was a family member more than a Butler.

We sat down in the limo. Lizzie, of course, sat next to me, much to the dislike of Johnny. He kinda grew on me, though; he was funny and extroverted, and he wasn’t as posh as Kyle, who was a nice bloke but just didn’t get it. He was always complaining, as if he had problems, of course, he hadn’t. He was rich, good at football, and good-looking.

Lizzie fell asleep after a while, her head resting on my shoulder. I didn’t dare to move for the rest of the ride. She looked so peaceful when she didn’t move her lips and spoke.

"Mate, that's unfair. Why does Lizzie sleep on you instead of me?" Johnny whined, but I ignored him. "I liked her first, brocade and everything, Simon."

"You don’t call dips on my sister, or I'll cut your tongue out," König spoke calmly. He was confusing me; he was mostly silent but always threatened everyone who came too close to Lizzie. He never threatened me though, of course not; no one saw a threat in me.

We arrived at a big white mansion, almost looking like the Buckingham Palace. I knew Lizzie was rich, but this rich? I should probably search Kortac up, what they did, and how her dad must be so rich.

John only shrugged as if it was nothing, making me feel like I was the dumb one. This wasn’t normal; why are they acting like this?

As I stepped into Lizzie's villa, my jaw practically hit the floor. I mean, I've seen big houses before, but this was something else. The entrance was like walking into a palace or something. The marble floors were so shiny

; I could see my reflection in them. And those pillars! They were taller than any trees I've ever seen, reaching up to a ceiling painted with fancy designs that made me feel like I was in a museum.

I couldn't help but gawk as I made my way through the place. The living room was like a dream. Soft, velvet couches and chairs were everywhere, so plush you could practically sink into them. Paintings and tapestries covered the walls, like something out of a history book. And don't even get me started on the fireplace! It was huge, with flames dancing and crackling like something out of a movie. All around were paintings that probably cost more than Mom's salary as a nurse.

The dining room was even more posh. A long, mahogany table stretched out in front of me, set with fancy plates and silverware that looked like they belonged in a museum. A chandelier hung overhead, sparkling with crystals and casting a warm light over everything.

In the kitchen, everything was shiny and new. Stainless steel appliances lined the walls, and there were bowls of fruit and baskets of bread everywhere. It smelled amazing, like something out of a cooking show. Chefs walked around the house; they had fucking chefs? I thought the Butler was much, but they had more staff. Didn’t rich people know how to cook for themselves?

As I wandered around, I couldn't help but feel a little jealous. I mean, we have a house; it's nice and all, but it's nothing like this. Lizzie's family must be really rich to live in a place like this. But as much as I envied her, I couldn't help but feel grateful that she was my friend, never judging me because of my scholarship like Tiffany did, and by the looks of it, Tiffany wasn’t even half as wealthy as Lizzie and König are.

"Mutter, Vater, Ich dachte Papa ist in Salzburg gerade," König said. He sounded more confident when he spoke German.

Lizzie's parents looked like nice people; her Dad was the tallest man I've ever seen and looked a bit intimidating, while her mom looked a lot like Lizzie herself, just older.

"Dein Vater hat gehört, ihr kommt hier her und ist direkt gekommen," her dad replied.

"Also, seid ihr nicht wieder zusammen?" Lizzie’s voice sounded so different in German, but she still sounded nice and soft.

"Nein, und sprech Englisch, das ist unhöflich gegenüber deinen Gästen," her mom scolded, her voice too loud for the small room.

"So, who do we have here?" Lizzie’s father asked curiously.

"I'm John Price, sir."

"Oh, like William Price?"

"Yes, that's my old man."

"We worked together quite a bit for his campaign."

"Wait, my dad worked with Kortac?" John lost the color of his face, and I really needed to know what the fuck Kortac is.

"I'm Johnny MacTavish."

"Well, didn’t hear of your family," Lizzie’s dad mustered Johnny.

"Richard, be nice," Lizzie’s mom scolded, in a tone too loud for the room. "Okay, and you are?" She gestured to me.

"Simon Riley, nice to meet you both, sir," I replied politely, shaking his hand, only to get my hand crushed.

As I followed Lizzie's family into the dining room, I couldn't believe my eyes. The table was like something out of a fancy restaurant, but way bigger. There were so many dishes spread out that I had never seen or tried before. I mean, I knew what a salad was and some of the other stuff, but there were these little black things in jars that Lizzie's dad called "caviar." I had no idea what that was, but everyone seemed to be enjoying it, so I tried a tiny bit. It was salty and kinda strange, definitely not like anything I'd ever eaten. Johnny looked as confused as me; of course, the academy had fancy food, but this was weird. And so much different from what mom cooked for us, and I longed for her lasagna right now.

Then there were all these different forks and spoons and knives laid out next to the plates. I was used to just one fork and one spoon at home, but here, it was like a whole set of tools just for eating. I glanced over at Lizzie, who noticed my confusion and tried to discreetly explain which fork to use for which course. But I could tell I was still getting it wrong.

Lizzie's family seemed used to all this fancy stuff, chatting away as they effortlessly used their array of utensils. Meanwhile, I was struggling not to knock over a glass or use the wrong fork. Her mom smiled kindly at me and offered some advice on what to try next, but I couldn't shake the feeling of being out of place. John and König, of course, knew how to act. I noticed how Lizzie’s dad liked John, but Lizzie’s mom definitely liked me.

It was strange; they were so familiar with each other, chatting at dinner and laughing, listening to Lizzie ramble about the school teaching shitty German. It was so different than at home; no one screamed, no one cried, and, most importantly, no one punched each other.

Johnny and I slept in one of the various guest chambers, and it was so comfortable, the best sleep I've ever had until I heard Lizzie scream from next door. I ran towards her room; I didn’t know what was wrong, but I needed to find out.

She lay in her luxurious room, whining and shaking in her sleep. I always thought rich families like these never had any problems, but here she was having night terrors.

I sat next to her in bed, brushing my hand towards her silky hair. "I'm here, Lizzie, everything is good."

"Please don’t kill me; I don’t know anything," she cried, and then König walked in, pushing me to the side while grabbing her in his bulky arms, whispering to her something in German until she calmed down and slept peacefully again. Now, all of us stood in her room. I just wanted to comfort Lizzie, telling her everything would be fine again.

"What was this?" John asked.

"Nightmares."

"That’s more than nightmares, mate," Johnny said, earning a death glare from König. I didn’t know what I thought, but I stood up and walked towards her bed again, cuddling her like Mom and Dad always did. For the first time, I could protect someone, and I’d protect her like she protected me.

"LEAVE."

"No, she is my best friend; I won’t leave." Slowly, after minutes, John and Johnny climbed into Lizzie’s bed. All of us wanted to comfort the girl who gave us everything every day. And so all five of us played together in the bed, eager to protect her from whatever haunted her. It was nice; having her in my arms was the last thought before I slowly drifted into a peaceful sleep.

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bi4pan-polls · 9 months

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Poll: round 2a #4

[ Image ID. AN image of Amelie Maçon and Rashmi Jamil from Entropic Float. They are standing next to each other, with Rashmi be hide Amelie. Amelie is holding her own arm and Rashmi is learning forward toward her, comfortingly. Amelie has light skin, and long pink hair in pigtails tried with black scrunchies. She is wearing a pink beanie, black glasses, a pink checkered coat, and a white skirt over hot pick pants with a bunch of black question marks on it as a design. She has black shoes. Rashmi has brown skin, and black hair that is mostly short but with long part in front. They are wearing a grey turtleneck, and black short shorts. They have on a brown jacket that is hanging off their shoulders, and a key necklace. they have on yellow headphones. They have long white socks and black shoes, and an image of 2 ocs, their images edited togther. On the left is Mel. She has a hot pink, long dress that puffs out. It is plad and has a black designs around it, she has pale skin, a mark on the left side of her face which goes down to her neck, and short brown hair. She has blue, purple and green in her eyes. On the right is Cree. He has short blond hair, and pale skin, he is wearing grey overalls over a green long sleeved sweater , that has a feather design over it, you can see the collar of a white button down under the green sweater. He is wearing sneakers. He has a Green right eye and a orange left eye, and he has eyebags. End ID]

info on Mel and Cree from @melodemonica

mel is a demon (not the biblical kind) and studies whats basically magic biology + psychology =D she also really enjoys traveling and wood carving! cree is human and i originally made him a lawyer of some kind but currently that's up in the air lol, he loves bad tv shows and pointing out the inaccuracies in them! they watch horror movies together and laugh at how stupid the characters are <3

Cree is trans

mel is as previously mentioned, a demon, she is thusly immortal so you can imagine the kind of angst that causes considering cree is a human dude, also since i've only mentioned this in some tags, cree is canonically trans

cree is the sole braincell in their friend group most of the time and he only uses it when he finds it funny or when his friends' shenanigans go a bit too far and they need bailing out

mel loves traveling solely for the sake of learning, she's totally the museum going type (cree is too but for completely different reasons) i imagine she gets genuinely a bit bummed when there isn't some kind of guided tour for her to take when traveling (she doesn't need it but she likes the experience)

they hated each other when they first met, cree was in a 'being an asshole is totally a normal and acceptable coping mechanism' phase and mel's usual trauma response is of the 'angry at the world and everyone in it' variety. they became close after being forced to become roommates and having to be in close proximity to each other's pathetic attempts at pretending to be alright

mel is american and cree is german-japanese, mel is completely emancipated + no contact while cree has a cordial but kind of strained relationship with his adoptive mother

mel's face markings are actually burns! (i just kinda suck at illustrating them lol) they extend all down her torso and part of her legs and arms

mel is very strong and frequently swings cree around just for funsies, whether cree enjoys this depends on the day

mel changes her hair very frequently, this is due to her demon-ness providing her shape-shifting abilities, this is hilariously the only thing she really uses it for

cree has a collection of those weird shirts that you see in facebook ads (and also memes) he got one from one of his siblings as a joke and everyone else just ran with it

speaking of siblings, cree has 8 and mel had 1, cree is also a twin though they're not really on speaking terms at the moment

mel cooks while cree bakes, because cree is good at the chemistry-ness of baking while mel is good at the whole add whatever your heart tells you to aspects of cooking

cree totally once mixed some unholy drink concoction (like coffee redbull and cherry pepsi or something similarly unholy) at 3 am and instead of telling him it was a bad idea mel probably asked him for a sip

mel is totally normal about her job she totally doesn't go on hours long rants about the effects of long term exposure to magical artifacts nope totally not

mel and cree used to be in a band, they played keytar and guitar respectively they were also the vocalist

#rashmeile #rashmi jamil #amelle macon #entropic float #oc x oc #ocs #poll #poll tournament #tournament poll

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3tabbiesandalab · 2 years

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Anaconda

Well someone had to write something based on this Lewis photo, so why not me?

A very very dumb fic. Robert ‘Bob’ Floyd x Reader

Featuring the chaotic Hangster and their love of ‘One Tree Hill’.

I know. A very weird combo. But it’s been a weird week.

And most of my fics now start with Maverick having a crazy team building idea apparently. Oh well!

No real warnings. Just a that I can’t write dance sequences very well! And lots of mentions of what Bob’s working with.

My masterlist if you’re interested

I hope you enjoy this pile of stupidity!

A loud, long, frustrated groan came from Bob as he stared at himself in the mirror in his ‘costume’, if you could even call it that. He was so incredibly nervous about this, and he flew dangerous missions for a living. He knew he’d agreed to it, but now that it was actually happening, shy, happy on the sidelines Bob was sure he was going to die of embarrassment.

It had all started innocently enough, as another one of Maverick’s bizarre team building exercises. Thankfully this one had been planned out a little more thoroughly than his other ridiculous ideas, but alcohol and the chaotic couple of Hangman and Rooster had become involved, and the plan spiralled.

Fucking Hangman and Rooster. Or Hangster, as they now liked to be called.

Maverick’s bonding ideas were based on all kinds of strange things, and that now included an episode of ‘One Tree Hill’ he’d watched during spending time with Penny’s daughter, Amelia. That is how his plan of the ‘Date with a Dagger’ auction, with all proceeds going to the American Cancer Society in honour of the late Iceman, had come about.

Of course Bob was on board with raising money for charity and he absolutely wanted to support Maverick with a cause that was clearly so important to him. But putting himself out there, being the centre of attention like that, was downright terrifying.

Unfortunately the night that Maverick had brought it up, was the night that Bob had decided to let his hair down a little at the Hard Deck and get a bit drunk. Bob had never seen the TV show they were talking about, but easily imagined the auction scenario. He commented out aloud how nervous and worried he was that no one would bid on a date with him, especially when the rest of the Dagger Squad was on offer too.

That was mistake number one.

His very boozed up friends reassured Bob, in varying and somewhat shitty ways, that someone was sure to bid on him.

First, a tipsy Coyote reminded him. “Don’t stress Bobby. Not everyone is after the jacked up, ‘sex on legs’ type.”

And although he was right, Bob wasn’t the muscle upon muscle wet dream the others were, the comment didn’t comfort him in the way he assumed Coyote had intended it to.

Next Payback clapped him on the shoulder and said, “Geeks get the girls.”

Bob knew he was smart, a little awkward and wore glasses, but his friends knew he’d been born and raised on a ranch, and could ride a bull and play the drums, so geek seemed a little extreme. Even though Payback probably meant for it to sound nice, it didn’t really lift Bob up at all.

“You’ve got that whole innocent boy scout thing going for you. Cougars love that shit man.” Fanboy giggled drunkenly at him.

He was sure Fanboy meant for it to be helpful and Bob knew he looked young for his age, but he certainly wasn’t innocent, not by any means. He wasn’t opposed to older women either, but a date, even for charity with a hard-core cougar would scare the fuck out of him.

Phoenix grinned at him with glassy eyes. “Bob. You give off major german shepherd energy. Mr dependable, responsible and loyal. People eat that crap up.”

Bob rolled his eyes at her weird, backhanded compliment. She wasn’t wrong, he prided himself on being reliable and trustworthy, but men and women weren’t going to bid on him just because he looked like a good person.

Rooster waggled his eyebrows at him. “You have a massive wang, Bob. Wear tight pants and you’re good to go.”

Everyone laughed loudly at that one and Bob shook his head in defeat. The size of his penis had become somewhat of an obsession with the squad since Hangman had caught a look at it one day. The idea that the quietest, most softly spoken team member had the biggest, well member, was initially a shock but now was an endless source of amusement for them.

Thankfully they moved on quickly and the group started enthusiastically talking about ‘One Tree Hill’ with Maverick. Bob was the only one who had never seen it, and Hangman was apparently a huge ‘OTH’ fan. He tried to follow along, but the plot about rival basketball playing half-brothers who’d never spoken despite going to the same school in the same small hometown for their whole lives, seemed a little far-fetched.

It became intense as they discussed who was on ‘Team Brooke’ or ‘Team Peyton’ and Rooster enthusiastically stated that ‘Naley’ was actually the best ship on the show. Bob had no clue what that meant but thought whoever this Lucas guy was, he sounded like a prick if he kept swapping back and forth between two best friends.

He lost interest and his eyes wandered the bar until they found YFN, as she wiped down a nearby table. YFN was Penny’s niece and the woman that Bob had it bad for. She was so beautiful, smart, kind, and witty and always took the time to talk with him. He sighed heavily as he gazed at her, he was firmly on ‘Team YFN’.

Bob watched her work for a moment and wondered if he’d ever have the balls to ask her out. YFN met his eyes, and she gave him a little wave. His eyes comically widened when he was caught staring and his mouth went dry as she crossed the short distance to him, with a tray of drinks in her hand. She wore a gorgeous, bright smile and he sat bolt upright and braced himself for their interaction. He usually turned into a shy, stuttering idiot around her.

“Hey Bert…” and Bob melted at her sweet voice and the stupid nickname she had given him. “I didn’t mean to eavesdrop but couldn’t help but overhear about the auction. Your friends have a fucked-up way of telling you how great you are, but they’re right. You’ve got nothing to worry about.” YFN said warmly, as her pretty eyes twinkled.

Bob blushed hard. He hadn’t realised she’d heard the conversation, including the stuff about his dick.

“I’ll have to start saving.” she murmured softly as she moved closer to him.

“W-why’s that?” he managed to stutter out in response, trying not to get hard at her closeness and her jasmine perfume surrounding him.

YFN smiled shyly at him as she replaced the empty glass in his hand with another neat whiskey and her fingers lightly brushed his. She was so thoughtful and Bob’s whole body lit up at her simple touch.

“Because I want to be able to afford you.”

Bob inhaled sharply at her implication that she wanted to win a date with him. He took a large gulp of his whiskey for courage and finally tried to make his move.

“I umm. You ah… We could…” He was totally unaware that the others watched as he failed miserably trying to flirt back.

He felt emboldened by the booze, but she was so close to him and that made Bob’s brain malfunction, so he struggled to complete a sentence. Someone kicked the leg of his bar stool and that snapped him into action.

“I doubt anyone else will b-bid on me, but I can umm… I’d like to ah take you on a d-date even if you lose. I mean if you want to that is.”

“Yes. I want that. I’d like that a lot.” And YFN leant into him and placed a soft kiss on his cheek.

Warmth washed over him like a wave, and he grinned like a fool.

The bell over the bar rang, signalling some poor schmuck had to by a round for everyone.

“I better go help.” she smiled sweetly back at him. But her smile turned salacious, and her eyes sparkled with humour “I’m still gonna keep squirrelling my money, Bert. Don’t want any cougars after that huge cock of yours.”

The squad burst into hysterics and Bob choked and coughed on air and she gave him another quick peck on the cheek and walked away giggling. Fanboy elbowed him and Payback slung an arm around his shoulders as Rooster and Phoenix made fun of him.

Eventually the laughter and the ribbing died down and he sipped his drink and gazed at YFN as she served the flurry of patrons. He couldn’t quite believe what had just happened and he reached up and touched his cheek where she’d kissed him and paid no attention to the team conversation about the auction.

That was mistake number two.

Eventually someone cleared their throat loudly and deliberately and Bob turned towards the group, his trance not quite broken.

“So you’re in then Bob?” Fanboy questioned.

Bob nodded, still dazed from the booze and his moment with YFN.

“And you agree to be a part of everything we just talked about?” Maverick asked warily.

Bob smiled at him and sincerely said “Yeah. It’s important to you Mav. Of course I’ll do it.”

“It is. Thanks kid. But you’re sure you’re happy to do this? Bob, you’re sure about the entire plan?” Maverick repeated cautiously.

“I am. Promise! Cross my heart and hope to die.” Bob replied drunkenly as he drew a little cross over his chest and he became distracted by watching YFN again.

Rooster snorted.

Phoenix waved her hand in front of his face. “Earth to Bob.” His blurry eyes returned to the group, and he focused on her. “You do realise what you agreed to. Right?” she looked at him with a half amused, half worried look on her face.

“Ah… Yes?” he answered gingerly, now not quite sure he did in fact know what he had just promised to do.

Hangman jumped up, fist pumped the air and practically squealed “Fuck yes baby.”

“Oh my god” Coyote laughed, “You’ve got no fucking clue, do you?”

Payback stood directly in front of him and put his hands on Bob’s shoulders like a person who is about to break bad news to someone would. “Well Bob for starters, you’ve agreed to be auctioned last.”

Bob nodded and shrugged “That’s not so bad. Maybe it’ll…”

“He’s not done.” Phoenix cut him off quickly.

“How do I put this…” Payback started to say.

“Season 4. Episode 12 baby. You’re doing a strip tease with me and Coyote!” Hangman clapped his hands together excitedly.

Bob paled. “Whhaat?” he wheezed.

“Mouth helps Nathan and Skillz enter an amateur strip night to try and win money cause Haley just got hit by a car, but Mouth…” Rooster started explaining.

“Wait. No spoilers! Amelia and I only got up to season 3 last night!” Maverick panicked and put his hands over his ears.

Bob sat there in shock. “A strip tease?” he whispered to no one in particular.

“Think of the money for charity it’ll bring in Bob. You were worried no one would bid on you. This will definitely help.” Phoenix commented.

Fanboy grinned at him. “You can’t back out now. You crossed your heart and hoped to die.”

“But me? Next to them? Two living, breathing ken dolls? I’m gonna look stupid.” he countered gesturing to Hangman and Coyote.

Hangman laughed lightly. “Baby. We might have the charm, the arms, and the abs to get everyone going… But as soon as you - the shy, nerd reveals his third leg… You’re gonna make it rain!”

Bob blanched as his friends cracked up at the visual. He took another big gulp of his whiskey.

“Don’t worry. No nudity Bob. Just down to your jocks.” Rooster winked.

Payback chuckled. “Yeah man. Don’t think the navy or Penny would be too happy if you guys went the full monty at the Hard Deck.”

He took a deep breath. Bob was drunk, he shouldn’t agree to this right now. He preferred to be on the edge of a scene, not right in the middle. But he could dance a bit and his body wasn’t bad so it might not be totally awful. Maybe it would help to make sure he got some decent bids and he had promised Maverick after all.

“Okay. I’m in. A strip tease for charity.” he blurted out.

Maverick gave him a satisfied clap on the shoulder. “Thanks kid. They’re right. It’ll bring in some good donations.”

“Damn. That is a shame.”

Bob’s head whipped around to see YFN grinning at him despite her disappointed tone.

“I’ll never afford you now. You taking your clothes off is bound to drive your price up.” she whined as she faked a pout and that drew his attention to her lips.

He almost groaned out loud because he wanted to kiss those plump, pink lips so badly. Pity he was such a bumbling mess around her. But Bob now knew YFN liked him, and he felt very daring from the drinks, enough to just agree to a strip tease.

Fuck it.

YFN was close enough to him, so Bob leant his body forward and reached out with his hand and grabbed hers. She squealed in surprise as he pulled her between his legs. They both sighed when Bob pressed his lips to hers softly.

“I’m more than happy to put on a private show just for you babygirl.” Bob drunkenly teased as he wrapped his arms around her waist, and his fingers danced up her spine. A surprised YFN blushed a rosy pink and smiled shyly at him.

“Aaarggh! I’m dating her aunt for christ sakes Bob. I’m out of here.” Maverick called out in outrage as he quickly got up and made a beeline for the bar.

The others whooped and laughed at both Maverick’s discomfort and Bob’s out of character public flirtation.

“Fucking hell. That’s what we’re talking about. That ‘shy boy goes sexy’ shit. Maybe we should be the ones who should be worried about dancing with you.” Coyote chuckled as he fanned himself with his hand.

Bob grinned then suppressed a moan as YFN turned in his arms and pushed her ass against his groin. Once the booze wore off, he was probably going to turn back into a stuttering idiot once again. Luckily for Bob, YFN seemed to like his usually awkward self and she had a naturally bold personality, so he was very sure it was going to work out just fine.

“With Hangman’s costumes and my music choice, no one will be able to resist you.” Rooster claimed suggestively.

That gave Bob cause for concern. “Wait a second. I didn’t know about that…”

“Nope. Too late! You agreed to everything. You promised.” Phoenix interrupted.

“Don’t worry about it baby. Roo and I are gonna take real good care of you.” Hangman drawled seductively.

Fucking Hangster.

Bob gulped. Suddenly, knowing Rooster and Hangman were in charge, the strip tease started to seem even more terrifying.

…….

Bob took a big swig of whiskey straight from the bottle as he waited in the staff bathroom at the Hard Deck. He cursed himself in the mirror repeatedly for drunkenly agreeing to the ‘Date with a Dagger’ auction, but he figured getting smashed again would probably help, so he took another long drink of booze.

Bob stood there and stared at himself in the ‘final reveal costume’ Hangman had chosen for him.

A pair of skin-tight, lycra trunks.

Coyote, Bob, and Hangman would strip down to them towards the end of their dance. Hangman had decided on a red, white, and blue pair to show they were patriotic navy boys, and it was no surprise Bob had ended up in the white trunks.

He sighed. Even though it wasn’t a thong, Phoenix had thankfully talked Hangman out of that, the jocks literally left nothing to the imagination. Bob wasn’t stupid, he looked pretty good, and that was the whole point of them and the rest of the get up. The shy, unsuspecting nerd with a decent cock hidden away.

Bob dressed in the rest of the outfit – his own glasses, a white button up, a red bow tie and plaid tearaway pants with suspenders. He had no idea where Hangman had found stripper friendly pants like this, let alone the jeans he had for his own cowboy attire and the bottoms for Coyote’s sleek black suit.

As far as Maverick’s weird team building exercises went, this was up there with the strangest. But Bob had to admit, apart from the almost gripping fear he was experiencing right now, it had actually been pretty good for him. In order to coordinate their ‘performance’, Bob had a lot of fun and had become closer with Coyote, Rooster, and Hangman as they hung out a lot while preparing for tonight.

The squad had also started watching ‘One Tree Hill’ together in their spare time. It was ridiculously unbelievable that as a teenager you could start a successful fashion line, run a nightclub, get attacked by your fake brother who is actually your stalker, and be allowed to get married in high school to the guy who lost his virginity to your sister, only to run off and tour America singing. Even so, Bob had conceded that the show was actually pretty addictive, and at least he now knew the reason why Hangman tried to paint the door of his naval housing bright red that one time.

The absolute best thing to come out of Maverick’s idea though, was the fact that he was now with YFN, the adventurous, intelligent, funny girl he’d been enamoured with forever. They’d been together since that night at the Hard Deck, and Bob was incredibly happy and in love.

He could hear the loud excited chatter at the Hard Deck, the promise of a date with a naval aviator had been enough to draw a very large crowd. Bob was so nervous and started having second thoughts; he wasn’t so sure if he could do this.

“Hey Bert. How’s it going back here baby?” YFN asked him softly as she walked into the bathroom. She stepped closely into his space and tried to tame one of the errant curls in his hair.

Bob relaxed slightly as he wrapped his arms around her waist and allowed her touch and jasmine scent to invade his senses.

“There’s a whole lotta people out there. I’m kinda shitting myself.” Bob chuckled anxiously.

YFN hummed. “Well I came to bid on and watch my man dance.” she said sweetly as she backed away from him.

He watched entranced as she started to unwrap the front of her dress.

“But if you don’t dance for me. Then you won’t get to see me dance for you.” she purred as she opened her dress to reveal her perfect tits in a navy-blue lacey bra and her pretty pussy covered by tiny matching panties.

Bob groaned loudly and had to work hard to keep his cock in check. “Fuck, babygirl.” he whined as he took in the incredible site that was his sexy girlfriend.

“Hang on. Is this? This is just like Skillz and Devon in that episode of ‘One Tree Hill.” he mused.

YFN winked at him and blew him a kiss as she turned to walk away. “Thank Hangman and Rooster, Bert. They thought it might be a good idea for me to watch it. Just in case you needed a little push to get your hot piece of ass on stage.”

Fucking Hangster.

…….

The auction part of ‘Date with a Dagger’ was going pretty well. Hondo, who acted as MC and auctioneer, reminded the audience of the rules, particularly that the winning bid didn’t include sex with the aviators. As each one of the squad stepped up, he read a little blurb about them as they strutted their stuff around a makeshift stage to a song of their choice. Everyone, except for Bob that is. Rooster had chosen his song and it was apparently a surprise. Thankfully he knew the music they were dancing to and that song too, had been specifically chosen with him in mind.

Maverick went first to the sounds of ‘Danger Zone’ by Kenny Loggins, and only got an initial bid of $8 until Fanboy called out and raised it to $50 with a reassuring smile. A bidding war then broke out between two twenty-something year old women who, Bob assumed with his limited knowledge of psychology, probably had ‘daddy issues’. Maverick looked extremely concerned until Penny came to his rescue and outbid them with $250.

The foxtrot team of Payback and Fanboy went as a duo, dressed in matching suits they carved up the stage with a coordinated routine to the original version of ‘Just the Two of Us.’ Hondo spouted arbitrary facts about the two men and stressed they were two for the price of one. It turned out the multiple cougars at the bar were very interested in them and several of them bid aggressively against each other until Payback’s wife swooped in and put a stop to it with a bid of $570.

The notes of Jerry Lee Lewis’s ‘Great Balls of Fire’ signalled Rooster’s turn and he strutted and wiggled his way around in his signature Hawaiian shirt and aviators. Hondo started to read his card “Like his call sign suggests, he has a big….”

He stopped himself just in time and flat out refused to read the rest. Rooster laughed at his response and did push ups on stage as Hondo ignored an incensed Hangman’s bids. He banged the toy gavel on his hand and auctioned Rooster off for $485 to some random and very excited woman.

Bob watched with a grin as his pilot took to the stage. Phoenix looked stunning in a gold dress, as she commanded everyone’s attention as she always did, to Beyonce’s ‘Run the World’. Hondo hadn’t even opened the bidding, when multiple men and women started to call out dollar figures.

“$600!” Bob shouted from the wings of the stage to encourage higher offers and Phoenix winked at him. Although he would have been happy to pay it, he was overjoyed when a pretty blonde out bid him by $80. And both her and Phoenix seemed happy about the outcome too.

“Now ladies and gents. Our last three men aren’t for sale just yet.” Hondo explained to a chorus of disappointed groans from the women in the crowd. “Don’t you worry, they will be. They just have a little something special planned for you all. So please dig deep for the American Cancer Society. Now put your hands together for Lieutenant Bob Floyd!”

This was all part of Rooster and Hangman’s stupid plan. He’d be introduced first, but auctioned last after he, as they called it, ‘dropped his big bomb on the crowd’ during the strip tease. Even though there were a lot of people and Bob didn’t love being the centre of attention, he was drunk enough to walk around just being his shy and awkward self.

Bob rolled his eyes at a laughing Rooster as ‘Whatta Man’ by Salt ‘n’ Pepa played as he wandered about the stage slightly embarrassed. He didn’t listen to Hondo’s commentary, instead he searched the crowd for YFN and smiled shyly when he found her. She looked around and covertly lowered the neckline of her dress to reveal the top of her lacy bra and winked at him. Bob blushed bright red as he remembered her promise and hurried off the stage as his friends catcalled and woof whistled at him.

Coyote and Hangman followed in quick succession as the group was terrified Bob was going to bolt before the big finale. Coyote looked suave in his suit and dark sunglasses and showed his swagger as 2Pac’s ‘California Love’ played and the crowd hooted and hollered. And Hangman dressed in his full Texan get up, complete with cowboy boots and hat, strutted his stuff to ‘Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy’ as the loud screams of multiple women filled the Hard Deck.

Fuck. It was time.

“You’ve got this Bob. Keep your eyes on YFN. And just enjoy yourself.” A tipsy Coyote hyped him up as he took a shot a tequila.

Hangman came off stage with a massive dumb grin on his face, he had clearly been drinking too. “Ready baby? Remember, you’re sexy as fuck. If I wasn’t in love with Roo, I would be all over your sweet little ass. C’mon. Say it with me. I’m sexy as fuck…”

Bob took one final pull from his bottle of whisky. No big deal. It was just dancing to raise money for charity. It was only a few minutes of his life. He could do this.

“I’m sexy as fuck.” he said determinedly as adrenaline and whiskey coursed through his veins.

Hangman jumped up and down like an excited puppy. “Atta boy! Now don’t poke anyone’s eye out with that thing.”

Bob laughed loudly as ‘Anaconda’ by Nicki Minaj started playing. He knew the song was coming but he still thought Rooster was a little shit for choosing it.

Coyote could dance pretty well and had been in charge of the choreography. To most people’s surprise, Bob had some moves, but Hangman was a disaster and jumped and flopped around like a middle-aged dad. They coordinated for a bit with their practiced moves, well Coyote and Bob did. They rolled, twisted, wiggled, shimmied, and twerked the right body parts at the right times during the song.

Bob found YFN in the screaming crowd of men and women and he smiled at her. She cheered with a huge grin on her face as she watched him with eager eyes. He kept his focus on her as he removed his suspenders and shirt in time with the music and the women squealed, presumably when Hangman and Coyote revealed their six packs.

He laughed as Hangman, with ‘Toy Boy’ written across his chest in blue writing just like Nathan had in ‘One Tree Hill’, lost track of their dance and just started grinding himself on the stage in a valiant effort to look like Channing Tatum. Coyote and Bob kept moving with the music and Hangman joined back in when they turned around with their backs to the audience. As soon as the song mentioned butts, they ripped away their pants to loud shrieks and hoots.

Bob was actually enjoying himself and grinned at Coyote and Hangman as they shook their asses at the crowd. He knew he was in pretty good shape too, toned arms and abs with muscular thighs and a bubble bum, but he was packing something a little extra than the other two. Hangman winked at him when it was time to turn back around and face the crowd.

As soon as Nicki rapped about some dude named Michael with a dick bigger than a tower, they spun back around and started gyrating their hips. Bob’s adrenaline was pumping, so without really even thinking about it, he gripped his dick in his hand. The squeals and the screams from the crowd crammed into the small space of the Hard Deck, was deafening.

Bob snorted as Phoenix, Payback and Fanboy jumped up and down and screamed his name. Rooster woof whistled repeatedly, and Maverick put his head in his hands in both shock and embarrassment. YFN caught his eye and winked again and laughed breathlessly as the woman next to her gawked at him with an open mouth.

Their choreographed moves had finished, so they just danced freely around to the rest of the song. For Hangman that comprised of hip thrusts, white boy twerking, slut drops, and Bob yelped when he smacked him hard on the ass. Coyote moved around the stage suggestively and actually looked like a male exotic dancer. People threw money at him, and one woman even reached up and tucked a note into his trunks.

Hangman smirked and moved the cowboy hat from his head to Bob’s as he dry humped his leg. Bob snorted at him and whipped out some basic hip hop moves to the beat of the music. He locked it down, did some stick and rolls and happy feet, and walked it out. He knew his cock flopped around while he danced and even over the music, he heard the gasps and all kinds of things being shouted that caused him to blush heavily.

“Oh my god.”

“Holy shit.”

“Look at that thing.”

“Jesus christ.”

“Fuck me dead.”

Bob finished with a moonwalk before the attention became too much for him and he tried to fade into the background and let Coyote and Hangman keep the spotlight for the rest of the song. He smiled widely and laughed loudly at them while they tried to do the lift from dirty dancing as the music finished and they ended up as a pile of limbs on the stage.

He walked over and offered them both an arm and pulled them on their feet and they grabbed him in a huge hug as the crowd screamed and cheered. Hangman took their hands and forced Bob and Coyote into a dramatic bow and Bob doubled over in laughter when he blew kisses at Rooster who caught them in his palm and held them over his heart.

Phoenix jumped up and down like a small, excited child and Fanboy and Payback started a ‘Bob’ chant which took off and soon enough the whole bar rhythmically called out his name. He blushed an even deeper colour and suddenly felt very exposed, so he quickly found his shirt and put it back on leaving it open and took Hangman’s hat off his head and covered his junk.

“Hear that? They fucking love you Bobby!” Coyote shouted joyfully as he wrapped his arms around him.

Bob chanced a small look at the crowd and gave them a shy smile and a little wave. A large number of ‘awwws’ came from the women in the audience. He found YFN and winked at her and she beamed at him as she clapped her hands and chanted his name along with everyone else.

Hagman grabbed him and gave him a big sloppy kiss on the cheek as the crowd finally started to die down. “Told you. You’re as sexy as fuck!”

“Alright, alright, alright.” Hondo did his best Matthew McConaughey impression. “Settle down folks. It’s time to put your money where your mouth is and bid on these boys.”

Hangman was first up, and he copied his boyfriend’s move from earlier and did some push ups as the bids came from women and men, thick and fast. The winning bid of $1000 came from a very possessive Rooster, who jumped on stage and kissed Hangman deeply in front of everyone.

Bob laughed as Coyote went through a series of body building poses while Hondo opened the bidding for him. The winning amount was $890 from a very attractive woman who Coyote had been eyeing off earlier in the evening. Bob guessed the rule about no sex would be broken by the end of the night.

It was now his turn, and he was scared shitless. A small part of him still thought that no one would bid on him, and the other part was terrified of the thought of spending time with some random stranger.

“Now ladies and gents, we have our final date of the night. The very ah… surprising Lieutenant Bob Floyd. One of the finest WSO’s the navy has to offer who just so happens to be packing his very own AIM-9 sidewinder. Do I hear $100 to start?” Hondo laughed heartily.

Bob was mortified and stared at the floor as people shouted out their bids on him. He couldn’t bring himself to listen and nudged a piece of discarded clothing in front of him with the toe of his shoe.

“Pay attention baby. Your cock is making bank.” Hangman laughed.

He finally looked up, bidding was down to two guys and one girl, and they intensely traded large figures back and forth as Hondo tried to keep track. Bob looked for YFN, but she wasn’t standing where she had been earlier. He momentarily panicked when he couldn’t find her, he really needed her to bid on him.

“Two thousand, one hundred and twelve dollars and fifty-three cents!” a familiar female voice shouted loudly.

Bob’s eyes bugged out of his head, that was a lot of money. YFN stood on top of the bar smiling widely as she shook the wad of cash in her hand into the air.

“Holy shit. Sold!” Hondo exclaimed and hit his hand with the toy gavel.

Bob grinned at YFN, and her eyes flickered with heat as she bit her plump bottom lip. He groaned as he remembered what she wore under her dress and gripped tightly to Hangman’s hat that hid his hardening dick from view. He was absolutely going to break the auction’s no sex with a dagger rule.

Rooster stood on stage with his arms wrapped around Hangman. “Thank fuck she got him.” he sighed and sounded relieved.

Hangman chuckled at his boyfriend. “Yeah, that would have been so awkward.”

Bob was thrilled that his girlfriend had won him and not some random person but was surprised at their reaction to the outcome of the auction.

“Huh?” Bob wondered out aloud as he watched YFN hop off the bar and push her way through the people to get to the stage. He couldn’t wait to get that dress off her.

“We might have put together a little something for you and YFN. Just like Naley.” Rooster smirked.

“Season 1. Episode 8 baby.” Hangman grinned.

Bob rolled his eyes at their obsession with ‘One Tree Hill’. He racked his brain for what it could be; the dagger squad had made him watch so many episodes in a short space of time.

He grimaced when he remembered Nathan and Haley get married in season one. “Oh god. Please tell me you didn’t plan a wedding. I love YFN… but I haven’t even told her yet…”

The couple laughed at him. “Chill baby. It’s a scavenger hunt date, just like Brooke set up.” Hangman reassured him.

“You guys are so weird. But thank you. That’s sweet of you.” Bob said sincerely.

“We do everything with your best interests at heart Bob. Surely you know that by now. Now tell us more about how in love you are with YFN.” Rooster teased.

Bob smiled warmly at the couple. He had no idea how these idiots ended up as his friends and even though they tended to put him weird situations, it always seemed to work out well for him.

“I adore her. I know it’s quick. But I’m so in love with that woman.” he breathed dreamily.

“That’s good to know Magic Mike. Cause I happen to be in love with you too Bert.”

He froze at the sound of her voice from behind him. Hangman winked at him and grinned, and Rooster waggled his eyebrows and made kissy faces as they walked away.

Bob beamed at them as he felt YFN’s arms wrap around him from behind and her warm body press into his back.

Fucking Hangster.

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mariacallous · 3 months

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One of Russia’s most famous 20th-century novels has returned to the Silver Screen. Infamously difficult to capture as a motion picture (more mystical observers even speak of a curse), Mikhail Bulgakov’s “The Master and Margarita” is back, reinterpreted by American-Russian filmmaker Michael Lockshin. The new movie stars Evgeny Tsyganov and Yulia Snigir in the titular roles and features German actor August Diehl (Gestapo major Dieter Hellstrom in Quentin Tarantino’s “Inglourious Basterds”) as the story’s demonic character Woland. Meduza reviews the controversy surrounding the film’s director and funding, the book’s cinematic history, and Lockshin’s adaptation.

The political controversy

Michael Lockshin’s “The Master and Margarita” averages an impressive 7.9/10 rating with more than 43,000 reviews at KinoPoisk and leads Russia’s box office in its opening week after earning 57.3 million rubles ($640,000) on its first day in theaters, but the director was making enemies before his film ever sold a single ticket. Self-described patriots denounce Lockshin as a Russophobe, a traitor, and a neoliberal besmircher of the intrepid Soviet secret police. They call him a hypocrite, too, in light of the fact that this new adaptation of Bulgakov’s classic was made (in 2021, before the full-scale invasion of Ukraine) with 800 million rubles ($8.9 million) from Russia’s Cinema Foundation, the state’s key funding agency for the domestic film industry.

Lockshin, who now resides in the United States, declined to answer Meduza’s questions about the backlash in Russia, saying he’s not yet ready to comment on the situation. On Telegram, pro-war channels have circulated screenshots of Facebook posts that are now hidden from non-friends where Lockshin shared independent reporting about the war in Ukraine, wrote that he’s donated to Ukrainian organizations, warned that future generations of Russians will be paying reparations for the “tragedy they brought to Ukraine,” and compared the Putin regime to Nazism in Germany.

State propagandist Tigran Keosayan has advocated criminal charges against Lockshin, while Trofim Tatarenkov, a host on Russia’s state-run Sputnik radio (who admits that he hasn’t even seen Lockshin’s movie), called the filmmaker “scum” and fondly remembered how such “enemies of the people” were shot during the Stalinist era.

Previous adaptations

In May 2016, poet and literary critic Lev Oborin wrote an essay for Meduza answering several “questions you’re too embarrassed to ask” about Bulgakov’s “The Master and Margarita,” including the most shameful of all: Can I just skip the book and watch a movie version instead? The short answer is, yes, you can always skip the book. In fact, unless you’re a student or some other kind of hostage, you can skip the movies, too. But since you asked, there are at least two previous screen adaptations of “The Master and Margarita” worth knowing about.

The better-liked version, at least until now, has been Yuri Kara’s 207-minute film, made in the mid-1990s but not released until August 2011. Meanwhile, in 2005, Vladimir Bortko created a miniseries for Russian television that was criticized for uneven casting and even worse special effects. Unfortunately for Bortko, the 10 episodes drew deeply unfavorable comparisons to his beloved 1988 adaptation of Bulgakov’s “Heart of a Dog.”

It’s also tempting to contrast Bortko’s miniseries with Kara’s adaptation — particularly how the two portrayed one of the novel’s most visually scandalous scenes: Satan’s Grand Ball. Filmed almost a decade later and made for TV, the sequence in Bortko’s series “looks almost puritanical” compared to Kara’s film, noted Lev Oborin. In raw terms of nudity and violence, this assessment is hard to contest:

youtube

So, is Lockshin’s adaptation any good?

Anton Dolin (a prominent Russian film critic who might be best known to casual Internet users as the interviewer who provoked Ridley Scott into saying, “Sir, fuck you. Fuck you. Thank you very much. Fuck you, go fuck yourself.”) liked Lockshin’s adaptation quite a bit. In a review published by Meduza, Dolin writes that the film “manages to retain the sharpness of the original source, which mocks Soviet power, and at the same time offers the viewer an innovative perspective on a classic text.”

Dolin praises Lockshin’s “Hollywood flourishes” and his capacity to juggle the book’s “genre and intonation incompatibility,” which has plagued past interpretations. The new adaptation brings a “circus element” to the story without sacrificing the script’s “rigidity,” says Dolin, while also “condensing the vastness of Bulgakov's novel into a coherent and clear narrative.” (You’ve been warned, formalists.)

Lockshin’s film takes some liberties with Bulgakov’s classic. For example, in the novel, the Master character doesn’t emerge until the middle of the book, leaving the reader to wonder about the title. In the new film, however, the main plotline belongs to the love story between Margarita Nikolaevna (the unhappily married wife of a Soviet functionary) and a writer she calls the Master. According to Lockshin’s script (which he co-wrote with Roman Kantor), the secondary narrative involving Pontius Pilate’s trial of Yeshua Ha-Notsri (Jesus of Nazareth) is a play within the story written by the Master and pulled from production by Soviet censors after its opening performance. (In a feat of authenticity unprecedented in modern Russian cinema, the Jerusalem scenes, which comprise roughly 10 minutes of the film, are performed in Aramaic and Latin.) Meanwhile, all the adventures across Moscow involving Woland and his entourage are presented as figments of the Master’s imagination as he slowly loses his mind under state persecution.

As Lockshin has argued in comments promoting the movie, Dolin says Bulgakov’s novel enjoys heightened relevance in contemporary Russia, and the new film makes menacing villains of NKVD executioners while presenting even more revolting characters in the Soviet elites whose conformity and hypocrisy enabled the Stalinist regime.

Dolin praises the decision to cast August Diehl as Woland, the mysterious foreigner whose visit to Moscow sets the plot rolling in the novel. Diehl’s Woland “is a real find,” Dolin writes. The German actor plays the character as “an infernally sarcastic gentleman in black” who resembles Satan “more than the thoughtful, sad wisemen from various Russian interpretations of the same character.”

A cartoonishly scary foreigner, complete with a spooky German accent, Woland turns out to be the creation of the writer’s wounded mind, his alter ego, writes Dolin. The censorship and persecution the character faces in the film are a “chilling reproduction” of mechanisms that resonate more in Putinist than Stalinist Russia, Dolin argues, highlighting some lines that wink boldly at modern-day realities, including nods to Crimea, oil production, and military parades.

Lockshin’s adaptation also features a fantastical version of Moscow that recalls the visionary designs of artists in the Higher Art and Technical Studios, which flourished in the 1920s before crumbling under Stalinism. In this universe, Moscow completed the Palace of the Soviets, altering the skyline in a delirious finale that depicts the city ablaze. This scene, in particular, has upset several state propagandists.

Dolin notes that Margarita is absent from the story for much of the film, but she reappears in the final act as a heroine on her own narrative arc. In the character’s scenes as a witch and then a queen, Lockshin’s intentions and the meaning of the novel’s title finally become clear, says Dolin:

It’s not the imagination of the writer that transforms the grim reality but exclusively the emotion that is capable of elevating you to the heavens, of burning cities, and punishing or pardoning with the mere force of thought. In the end, Lockshin’s film is not about Satan, not about Moscow, not about Pilate, and not about totalitarianism, censorship, or creativity, but about love. It alone makes a person invisible and free.

#Youtube

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ceresfromnationstates · 13 days

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Character ref sheets: Henry H. Stickmin

A repost.

Henry Harison Stickmin

Nicknames: Hen, Hank, Sticks, Sticky, Sir Harison, HS_1214, Person of Interest #52763

Age: 28 (As of mid 2019.)

Birthplace: Carlsbad, NM

Current Location: Tucson, AZ

Nationality: Scottish-American

Physical description: Normal build, Blue eyes, (White, sunburnt skin), Shaven hair, Two scars on right forearm, Scar near upper abdomen.

Bio: It would seem that he's done with being a petty criminal. For now.

Just a normal dude like everybody else like him in his country.

No traumatic past, just a normal, carefree kid.

His parents divorced in late 2013, but they're still on good terms.

He's a bit Introverted, and as such is usually silent and doesn't feel all that comfortable out in public.

He considers himself an Agnostic.

Sometimes communicates using hand gestures or body language.

Doesn't like speaking in length, but can if he wants to.

Not a person to let bygones be bygones.

This particular Henry hails from a timeline where he hated toppats and other associated organized criminal groups.

Has substantial knowledge of other timelines, even remembers experiencing a temporal phenomenon well before the botched bank robbery attempt.

Frequently has vivid dreams (or nightmares) about bizarre things, and sometimes about things in the past or the other (less fortunate) timelines.

Has a diary to write down whatever happens in a day or what he's just experienced.

Has been keeping diaries well since mid 2016.

Knows about his extraordinary luck.

Doesn't know how many superntural abilities he possesses.

His knowledge about what happened in those timelines has made him pessimistic, a bit depressed, and hate himself for existing.

Has contemplated on the possibility that he might be living in a simulation, but has since dropped such "bogus crackpot conspiracy bullshit".

A light smoker. One pack is enough to last 2 weeks, and he rarely smokes.

His notoriety has died down since the beginning of 2019.

Sometimes asked if he is the real Henry Stickmin by passing pedestrians.

Has accounts on Reddit, Twitter and YouTube, all under the alias HS1214 and Twitter handle TheHenryHStickmin.

Has a close relationship with Ellie through their shared hardships.

He and Ellie bought a home together using both of their Gov't' monetary compensation.

Sold his old home too.

Both have lived normal daily lives, so far.

A novice home cook.

Has a large amount of friends/accomplices/confidants, ranging from high school and university classmates, members of the Goverment/Armed Forces, members of several police departments, and even an ex-CCC contractor, as well as from countries as far and obscure as Honduras, Australia, New Zealand, the Czech Republic, Turkiye, etc.

Knows a lot of languages, most notably Spanish, Scottish Gaelic, French, Portuguese, Italian, Romanian, German, Polish, Serbo-Croatian, Russian to name a few.

Keeps a roster of his notable confidants/accomplices on paper.

Knows Charles and Dave only to some degree, despite having met them on more than one occasion.

Never ashamed of being a former petty criminal.

Has an H&K USP Compact and an M16A2.

Likes wearing the same set of basic clothing every day (T-shirt, Trousers, Boots)

Recently started wearing boots more often.

Has a taste for clothing, loves thrifting and milsurp gear.

Sometimes, he will wear all black, balaclava included.

Other than his scooter, he also owns a Honda CR-V, which both he and Ellie drive.

Keeps all of his trinkets somwehere in his bedroom, even his Teleporter.

Puts some of his "spoils of war" (a number of various items from previous criminal acts) on display in his parts of house in a show of bravado. Including an empty money bag and the bumper of a police cruiser, license plate included.

Now just trying to live a more righteous life and stay away from crime.

Watched one too much news on TV and is probably plotting something daring against the remnants of what was once the Toppat Clan.

At the same time he only wishes to live a normal life and probably reverse his past mistakes temporally.

Doesn't know whether the CCC is onto him or not.

#the henry stickmin collection #henry stickmin collection #thsc #thsc fanart #henry stickmin fanart #henry stickmin #thsc henry #thsc henry stickmin #character ref sheet #ceres hath spoken

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sagemonsters · 8 months

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@bollylion has a blind date with...

Nyrris the Dragonborn

Nyrris is a 9 ft. tall (274 cm), muscular dragonborn with dark red scales and spiraling horns. He has a long tail, a pair of wings (one of which is very holey and tattered thanks to a workplace accident—he can’t fly anymore), and some eye ridge piercings. He tends to dress in sweatpants and a tee-shirt regardless of the occasion.

Nyrris is, first and foremost, a cinephile. Like many dragons and dragonborn, he compulsively collects a particular type of thing to make a hoard out of, and Nyrris’ preferred hoard-items are DVDs and VHS tapes. He doesn’t trust streaming services of any kind not to remove their content at a moment’s notice (thereby robbing him of his hard-won treasures), and so is very invested in physical media. He loves all kinds of movies, but most of his collection is composed of 20th century American, German, and Japanese films—he’s slowly expanding into the world of Bollywood with your help!

Nyrris likes to work out. After his workplace accident, he had a lot of physical therapy, and has gotten accustomed to the staring and awkward questions while visiting his local gym. He trusts you not to “other” him with odd remarks about his injury, however, and encourages you to come to the gym with him. He likes the feel-good endorphins that come with exercise and is hoping that you will like them as well.

Nyrris loves to curl up on the couch with you to watch movies in the evenings. He’s seen all of the films in his own collections at least three times, and so is much more interested in your favorite movies than his own. Although he has a tough exterior, he has a secret fondness for romantic comedies and is riveted by the high drama and emotion of Bollywood romances. With your permission, he’s also started perusing your collection of romance novels as well, since he wants to try and figure out which ones will get film adaptations next.

Nyrris is a very warm person—not necessarily in personality, but rather in literal temperature! As a red dragonborn, he has a core of fire and is always very warm to the touch. Cuddling with him on a cold night feels absolutely wonderful, but on a sweltering summer day he’s almost too hot to hold hands with. He worries that you, as a non-dragonborn, are too cold most of the time and is always quick to offer a snuggle session.

Your classic films club had a new member!

Who could it be? you wondered. A lot of the members of the club were significantly older than you, and you were secretly hoping for someone a little closer to your own age. It was your turn to host the biweekly movie night, however, and you had spent the afternoon preparing a variety of snacks so that everyone’s dietary requirements and preferences were satisfied.

All of the familiar faces filed into the living room, and John started fiddling with the HDMI cable attached to the TV screen. However, his actions seemed halfhearted; the new member was usually given the honor of selecting the movie for the first meeting they attended, and Nyrris (whoever that was) had yet to show up.

A quarter past eight o’clock in the evening, there at last came a heavy knock on your front door. You opened it and looked up… and then further up, toward the chin of a towering red dragonborn.

“Hi,” he rumbled. “I’m sorry I’m late. It’s weirdly hard to find vegetarian options for Korean takeout. Anyway, I’m Nyrris.”

“Did you bring food?” you asked.

“Yep. Emily told me in an email that there were fourteen club members, so I guesstimated how much everyone would eat… and I’m happy if people take leftovers home, really. I know I tend to overbuy when it comes to feeding humans—”

“It’s the host’s job to cook, so I’ve already made food for everyone,” you said.

“...Oh,” Nyrris said. He shifted his clawed grip on the bulging plastic bags full of takeout. “Well, this is incredibly awkward.”

You whipped out a reassuring smile and gestured for Nyrris to come inside. He had to stoop to prevent his horns from gouging holes in the ceiling, but made no complaint as he followed you to the kitchen and set down the bags. Everyone else came over to make their introductions as you two worked together to get the Korean takeout set up among the food you had already prepared.

“So what are you interested in watching, Nyrris?” John asked.

“It’s October, so I figured people would be in the mood for something spooky. How about the 1922 Nosferatu?”

Henrietta wrinkled her nose. “We did German Expressionist films throughout July.”

Nyrris paused, then said: “Sorry, I didn’t realize.”

“How about some romance?” you volunteered. “Maine Pyar Kiya is supposed to be one of the most sweeping and epic romantic movies ever made.”

“Why do you like Hindi movies so much?” John asked at the same time that Sam piped up with, “Rom-coms are boring.”

You narrowed your eyes at both men. You often found yourself disagreeing with Sam, who thought that Tarantino movies were the end-all-be-all of cinema, but John wasn’t usually like this.

“I think Maine Pyar Kiya is a great idea,” Nyrris said, his voice a firm baritone rumble somewhere far above your shoulder. That seemed to settle it, and everyone filled up their plates with snacks and filed back into the living room to watch the classic Indian movie. You found yourself sitting next to Nyrris, who’d made your couch creak alarming when he’d sat down. The heat radiating off of his scaled body was a welcoming warmth, and it was hard not to lean against him as the movie played.

When the credits finished rolling, everyone said their goodbyes. Nyrris stayed behind to clean up the kitchen with you and collect his takeout; he had indeed overbought, and the smaller members of the movie club had barely made a dent in the feast.

“Thanks for standing up for me back there,” you said once everyone else had left.

Nyrris chuckled. “No worries. That Sam guy sure seems like an entitled idiot, if you don’t mind me saying so.”

You snickered. “Nah, I don’t mind; he kinda is. Did you like the movie?”

“Oh, yeah, it was great—I really do mean that. I don’t watch many Bollywood movies.”

“Do you want to see more?” you asked, then felt your cheeks heating in a blush when you realized the implications of that sentence.

Nyrris grinned down at you, his horns brushing the ceiling. “With you? Anytime.”

see here to get your own blind date with a monster!

#monster romance #monster lover #terato #monster x human #monster boyfriend #sage's monster matches #reader insert #x reader #gender neutral reader #dragonborn dnd

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dykepuffs · 7 months

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I love that in England even though we don't have thanksgiving, we still watch Goncharov at the end of November at basically the same time, so we can talk about it with the Americans who saw it on TV.

This year, for the chaos factor, I will be eschewing the Director's Cut in favour of either watching the 320 minute Deutsche Welle miniseries with the (famously awful) German dub, or the 92 minute cut that only ever aired on Channel 4 when the news ran long.

#goncharov

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gothicwidowsworld · 2 years

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Angie M.S

A/N this isn’t great but i haven’t posted anything in AGES bear with me also warning i guess talks of period pain

If Y/N L/N’s scrolled through her phone right now she was a thousand percent sure she’d see stories from her friends and family enjoying their Friday evening. In fact she knew her friend Y/F/N was planning a much needed night out but instead the y/h/c girl was at home. Time was seemingly passing but Y/N couldn’t quite be sure. She’d watched the f1 practices and even managed to catch some of f3 as she came in and out of consciousness. The girl had been feeling under the weather on and off throughout the day, cursing that after months of seeming painless visits from aunt flo that now she could barely move without feeling like she was being stabbed with a red hot poker. Medicine had managed to take the edge off but still.

Taking a bite of her slice of now lukewarm at best pizza Y/N frowned at the interruption of her Friday night plans. Despite having a Mick free weekend the y/h/c young woman was donned in a pair of sweats and an old worn hoodie that had definitely seen better days, an episode of Golden Girls displayed on the tv. If she was being honest Y/N hadn’t really been paying attention to the show, instead using it as background noise. It wasn’t like the y/h/c girl hated her own company but with her feeling under the weather and lacking human company some noise was better than nothing even if it was three American ladies complaining. “Miss me already Schumacher,'' the y/h/c young woman hummed teasingly, answering the facetime request without hesitation before sluggishly reaching for the remote to mute the show.

Y/N didn’t have to check the contact name before accepting the request, Mick had a habit of calling her every night they were apart, whether his absence was work based or domestic. The soft German had been bashful at the start of their relationship, scared of coming across as clingy but over time the part had gotten used to each other's so called quirks. “What I can’t miss my girls?” Mick asked innocently feigning a look of horror but the small grin settling on his pale features breaking his joking façade. “Ah girl.” the y/h/c girl corrected, lifting her phone higher to gesture at the sofa currently housing her, her pizza and a blanket. There was a hot water bottle floating around somewhere but that was now long forgotten having lost its comforting heat over the past couple of hours.

“Where’s Angie” the German Driver asked in confusion, despite the dog originally being Mick’s it didn’t take long for Y/N to adopt Angie as her own furbaby. The German treated Angie like another family member but Y/N treated Angie like she was her life. It was unusual to see the two without each other especially if Mick was away. Angie loved being able to get unlimited cuddles without the blond man interrupting. Tucking her feet underneath her tired form the y/h/c girl frowned, tilting her head slightly as she searched the room. The Australian shepherd was currently curled up on her bed in the corner of the room fast asleep. Clearly so tired she hadn’t heard Mick’s familiar voice flood the room. “Angie?!” Y/N called gently, “Angie dein papa ist hier” the y/h/c young woman continued cooing slightly as the calm dog awoke. Patting the space beside her Y/N smiled softly as the tan dog bounded over seemingly now aware of what was happening.

“Are you feeling any better Liebling?” Mick asked quietly, changing the conversation, his natural concern rising to the surface. The Haas Driver had been so disappointed that Y/N wasn’t able to go to Barcelona, especially after not having her for Miami but the young couple had agreed it wasn’t fair to travel when she was in such pain. The y/h/c young woman had unfortunately been unwell in the past couple of days and the combination of mind numbing pain and the general washed out feeling led her to staying home. It was nobody’s fault, nobody was to blame but Mick couldn’t help but be upset. “Mick I’m fine honestly.” the y/h/c young girl insisted, shooting the German Driver a reassuring smile. Capturing the girl’s y/e/c orbs the German narrowed his eyes suspiciously, his welcoming blue orbs scanning the phone screen for any possible sign that she was lying. “Mick, I promise I’m ok! I have Angie, I have Pizza and if I really need it I have pain relief.” Y/N stated calmly absentmindedly reaching for the dog in question. Angie had now settled beside the girl and had nodded off. “Well I mean if you have pizza you must be fine.” Mick exclaimed in mock exasperation choosing to ignore the mention of medication. “I’m not sure I like that tone Schumacher…I’m not sure Corinna would either.”

“You wouldn’t snitch on me to my Mum. You love me too much.” Mick replied confidently. “Oh wouldn’t I?” Y/N replied plainly with a shrug of her shoulders.

#gothicwidow #imagines #au imagines #x reader #mick schumacher imagines #mick schumacher x reader #f1 imagines #f1 x reader #formula one imagines #formula one x reader

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aceofwhump · 3 months

Note

I have a potentially strange question, but the search feature on Tumblr leaves a lot to be desired - do you know of any good WWII whump? Specifically that might involve hospital scenes, or takes place in Europe vs the Pacific theater? The WWII movies I know off the top of my head that involve (admittedly brief) scenes in a hospital/dealing with illness rather than injury are Unbroken (Japan) and Hacksaw Ridge (also Japan), The Great Raid (Phillipines), Flags of Our Fathers (Japan again), and Empire of the Sun (Japan and China). If context helps, I'm working on a one shot for Sam Gillespie and Sister Boniface and referencing his time on Sword Beach. (if you haven't seen it, highly recommend - WWII vet DI is besties with a former code-cracking nun who moonlights as the police scientific advisor and the solve crimes and make puns in 1960's Cotswolds).

I can definitely help you here!! I tend to lean more towards watching ETO WWII media myself. And oddly enough a lot of I've watched doesn't have that much whump. Which is weird for a war film/show. But here are some things I'd recommend:

Band of Brothers - follows U.S. Army troops of E "Easy" Company, 506th Regiment of the 101st Airborne Division from their training in England through D-Day and the rest of the war in Europe.

World on Fire - this show follows characters in Warsaw, Manchester, Berlin, and Paris during their lives as the Nazi party begins to take hold of Europe. Season 1 is set from March 1939 to July 1940 and shows events like the Defense of the Polish Post Office in Danzig, the Battle of the River Plate, the Dunkirk evacuation and the Battle of Britain. Season 2 covers October 1940 to May 1941 and shows the North Africa Campaign, The Blitz, Nazi Germany, and Occupied France.

X-Company - follows five recruits as they are trained as agents at a secret Canadian training facility, Camp X near Lake Ontario east of Toronto and then sent out into the field in Europe.

Dunkirk (2017) - This movie is all about the Battle of Dunkirk and the

Atonement (2007) - Allied soldiers from Belgium, the British Commonwealth and Empire, and France are surrounded by the German Army and evacuated during a fierce battle in World War II.

Combat! - a tv series from the 60s that follows a front line American infantry squad as they battled their way across Europe

Saints and Soldiers (2003) - Four American soldiers and one Brit fighting in Europe during World War II struggle to return to Allied territory after being separated from U.S. forces during the historic Malmedy Massacre.

Saving Private Ryan (1998) - Set in 1944 in France during World War II, it follows a group of soldiers, led by Captain John Miller (Tom Hanks), on their mission to locate Private James Ryan whose three brothers have been killed in combat

finally I totally need to watch sister boniface!! that sounds great!

#mod replies #wwii #ask

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bitter69uk · 29 days

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“If Shirley Stoler shows up in something you’re watching, chances are at the very least it’s not going to be boring - and she shows up in the damndest places, impossible to ignore when she shoulders her way on-screen. There she is, for example, dubbed into Italian to play the zaftig commandant in a German concentration camp in Lina Wertmüller’s Seven Beauties (1975), where she’s serviced by prisoner Giancarlo Giannini. And as nasty neighbor Mrs. Steve on the television show Pee-wee’s Playhouse, a toxic character axed after the first season in 1986, apparently because Stoler so rubbed Paul Reubens the wrong way. And in Frank Henenlotter’s Frankenhooker (1990), of which little more needs be said than it’s titled Frankenhooker. And as the pawnshop proprietress who whacks off Alec Baldwin’s digits in Miami Blues (1990), George Armitage’s adaptation of Charles Willeford’s blackly comic detective novel, in which her casting, per Armitage, was a homage to her breakthrough role in The Honeymoon Killers (1969), Leonard Kastle’s road trip through an all-American hellscape.”

/ From “All-American Medea: Shirley Stoler in The Honeymoon Killers”, Nick Pinkerton’s astute essay for The Criterion Collection, 22 March 2017 /

Born on this day: fiercely charismatic, menacing and memorable American character actress Shirley Stoler (30 March 1929 – 17 February 1999). If all Stoler did was star in vicious 1969 cult classic The Honeymoon Killers, her legacy would be secure. In addition to the credits Pinkerton cites above, she also crops up in Klute (1971), The Deer Hunter (1978) and Desperately Seeking Susan (1985) and (on TV) Charlies Angels, Miami Blues and soap operas The Edge of Night and One Life to Live. What a résumé! A persistent urban myth: that Shirley Kilpatrick – leading lady of el cheapo sci fi b-movie The Astounding She-Monster (1957) - and Stoler are one and the same person. To complicate things considerably: Kilpatrick died in 1971. Portrait of Stoler by John Deane.

#shirley stoler #john deane #lobotomy room #character actress #cult cinema #cult classic #the honeymoon killers #pee wee's playhouse #seven beauties #frankenhooker #desperately seeking susan #klute #charlie's angels #shirley kilpatrick #fierce

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overlookedwwiimedia · 2 months

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The Young Lions (1958)

Basic Story: German Christian Diestl becomes more and more disillusioned with his country's ideology as Americans Noah Ackerman and Michael Whiteacre figure out here roles in the Army on their march across Europe.

Fan Thoughts: The Young Lions is based on a novel of the same name, however significant changes were made to German character Christian Diestl (Marlon Brando), making him more sympathetic on-screen by portraying him as a man tricked into his role in the war rather than corrupted by power. Despite this choice somewhat taking the teeth out of the role, Brando puts in an arresting performance that makes this film worth watching just for his acting. On the other side of the war, Noah Ackerman (Montgomery Clift) and Michael Whiteacre (Dean Martin) meet during their Army draft physical and Whiteacre invites Ackerman to a party he’s throwing; Ackerman meets his future wife Hope Plowman there. The film follows these three men throughout the war until their dramatic meeting during the final act. That switching between different characters is the only thing that could be improved in this film; it is slow to jump between the different characters, staying with one or the other for so long the audience starts to forget about the other characters existence. However, the acting, the sets, the cinematography, every piece of the production all make this a gripping film that holds the audience’s attention throughout!

Warnings: non-graphic fighting sequences, mention of suicide

Available On: Prime Video, Apple TV, YouTube, Vudu, Google Play

#wwii movies #overlookedwwiimovies

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