#DOES IT NOT LOOK SO COOL THO. IDGAF

[natsmagi]

what if you wanted to design a silly tattoo for yourself but then you ended up being way too picky with the details and now youre in too deep and its eating you alive because you cant do your usual messy style it needs to be PERFECT but you FUCKING SUCK AT THESE KIDS OF ILLUSTRATIONS and youre PROCRASTINATING LIKE CRAZY but u DONT WANNA WORK ON ANYTHING ELSE so now ur STUCK HERE

#today on Stupid shit im getting myself into #DOES IT NOT LOOK SO COOL THO. IDGAF #i dont wanna design tsumugis bit tho I DONT WANNA DRAW A BIRD #AND IM UNSURE HOW TO GO ABT HIS WINDOW AND IF ILL EVEN DRAW IT OR JUST GO AURORA LIGHTS #AUGHUFHUJHIJF #HOW DO PEOPLE DO THIS #nat rambles

[ebonyslasher]

Let’s Get High

Title: Let’s Get High

Requested by: Rated_M on Ao3

Danny Johnson:

Reaction: Confused, but Cool

Danny came home one day to discover you relaxed on the couch with a blunt in your hand. His reaction is interesting….He’s actually pretty confused.

Really didn't know how HE didn't know that you smoked….that little detail must have escaped him. His stalking skills must have been lacking.

He’s gonna smoke with you. But, he isn’t into using blunts. His energy is too chaotic for that- bongs are where it’s at for him.

He has a collection of some sick-ass bongs he’s bought (or stolen).

He will probably try to match how often you smoke- he doesn’t want to be high alone.

Reaction: Ecstatic

“Let me introduce you to my second best friend….dat OG Kushhhhhhhh bra”

You can take ONE look at this man and it’ll take a ½ a second to know he’s a weed head.

When you pull your small bag of weed out, he lugs out this huge bag of them. While you were impressed, he was just happy to know you smoked too.

Will smoke any type of way….He’s made a big makeshift smoke pipe a few times…Even tried to smoke out of his bootyhole lol (he can still feel the burn).

Gets you and himself all the weed apparel and memorabilia he can find.

A mess of giggles and silliness whenever y’all get high.

Stu has the best dealer in the world…so many different strains that have you salivating.

Reaction: IDC

Does not give a fuck in the best way possible. He’s not surprised to know that you smoke.

He does like how relaxed and free you get when you do. The vibe you give off calms him down too

Saw you longingly looking at this device when watching 2 Chainz Most Expensivest. It was ordered and given to you within a one-week span.

Whether or not he will indulge himself with you…..I don't know. It could go either way.  Jesse doesn’t seem like a smoker to me

Reaction: Horrified (Unless for Medical)

The devil's lettuce…in his house? On his land? The dirt, trees, and Flowers?! How dare you!

The only way he would accept you doing it is if you had a medical condition.  That’s it

Would rather you not smoke it…being in the woods and all. Don’t want any forest fires.

So edibles or oil would be the way to go~

He’ll accidentally eat any edibles you have unlabeled if you infused the oil in your cooking.

Ever seen a big (height) hunk of muscle not move in 4 hours? That’s him

….you start labeling your food from now on

Reaction: IDGAF

Doesn’t give a fuck in the worst way possible. Meaning that if you get too high, he won’t help (unless he’s in a very good or affectionate mood). And if he wants you to do something (or do something to you) he won’t care.

His opinion of you doesn’t change.

He does enjoy seeing the different reactions that you have. Never a dull moment in observing you

If not observing or annoying you, he just leaves you alone and goes out to kill

Discovered the concept of edibles in the worst way. He unknowingly ate your weed brownies one day….and this bitch ate half the pan.

It hits the FUCK out of him hard….and in his paranoia- rage-induced state, he throws the pan of brownies on the ground and curb stomps them

The look of betrayal he gave you was too funny tho…you had to laugh

Good thing he likes you and is too fucked up at the moment…. He could've killed you for that.

#slasher x reader #black reader #Michael Myers #jason voorhees #Stu Macher #danny johnson #jesse cromeans #chromeskull #michael myers x reader #jason x reader #stu matcher x reader #ghostface x reader #danny johnson x reader #chromeskull x reader #jesse cromeans x reader #le oiu'd #going above the clouds

[yokakaiju]

tristamp thoughts/live watch ramblings

preface: i already have a very bad impression of tristamp. i literally have been into trigun for maybe a week now and i have seen most of 1998, but im trying to go into tristamp with a clear head and view it objectively, but i genuinely looked at the character designs and legatos redesign made me resent it immediately tbh...

ANYWAY, im live watching as i write this, so apologies if its sporatic

okay so the good stuff so far

uhh... its very pretty!!! ill give it that. it really shows the evolution of 3d anime over time, and as someone who typically doesnt enjoy it i think tristamp is absolutely beautiful. first 3d anime i ever saw was knights of sidonia and i have a deep appreciation for where 3d anime is now compared to a decade ago

i kinda like meryls new design the best? i like her hat, its cute. everyone else is so... eh, tho. merylls redesign is chill with me tho

roberto is fine ig. i like old men characters sometimes and like, idk whenever im not sad abt milly not being here im okay enough with roberto existing

now on to my ever growing laundry list of complaints that ik will get worse if i keep watching (spoilers for trimax probably)

one, WHY IS VASH LIKE THAT?? LIKE WHY IS HE SUCH A WHINY CRYBABY?? LIKE SHUT UP DAWG!!! idk, ik vash is a silly emotionally explosive highly insecure funny little fella and i love him for it, i think vash is a great character, but why did they make him kinda a pathetic bitch in stamp? like, i usually dont watch dubs but i am for trigun cause my tv is kinda far from my bed and i dont wanna sit uncomfortably to read subs rn (BLEH!!!), so maaaaaaaybe sub vash is better, and no shade to the va i like his voice a lot for vash tbh, but bro pls stop crying every two seconds im gonna lose it. why is vash lowkey proslavery (THIS IS A JOKE), BUT FR!!! why is he more like... idk chill with plants being used ig ????? im sure hes not really, but like... dude, you arent the same

two, okay this made me actually mad, but why in the actual fuck was knives immediately introduced and why is he like some weird well known plant stealing cave hermit??? like??? no??? he wouldnt do that??? also why is he so present in this world LIKE DOES LOST JULY NOT EXIST IN THIS CANON??? WHAT IS THIS??????? i literally hate this rewrite. like... trimax is right there dawg... you did not have to rewrite literally everything. addition as i watch episode 3, why is he like that? why can he make purple? why does he have razors??? he doesnt talk like that ever??? why is he so??? i hate him actually??? this is not the knives ik and love??? who is this skinwalker????? HE DID NOT ACT LIKE THIS IN TRIMAX WHO IS THIS??? I REFUSE TO BELIEVE THEY REWROTE KNIVES THIS WAY OH MY GOD

three, why did everyone get an objectively bland redesign? like... i dont mind vashs hair. idgaf, but i literally hate his fucking totk link "lost power source" green ass arm. why cant it just be an ugly brown robot arm with a gun in it. whys it gotts be all "cool" and "green" and "mysterious", like IT DOES NOT HAVE TO BE CYBERCORE TECHWEAR NEOFUTURISM ASS SHIT!!! i havent seeeeeeen wolfwoof in action yet, but i fucking hate his tristamp design. WHY IS HE A TWINK??? WHERE ARE HIS BOOBS??? WHY IS HE NOT A PRIEST??? LITERALLY TURNED A PERFECT CHARACTER INTO A BASIC BITCH FOR NO REASON. also like... knives. why is he... why is he like that. put shoes on plz the sand is hot babygirl. why are you wearing a tumour coat and ugly matrix ass bodysuit? where did your shoulderpadded objectively cooler dio-esque military outfit go? especially tho, i DESPISE legato and livios redesigns. i think they are SOOOOO butt ugly in tristamp and FOR WHY??? WHY DID THEY MAKE LEGATO SO FUCKING UGLY??? LIKE HE WAS SO HOT IN 98 AND ESPECIALLY IN TRIMAX OH MY GOD HES SO HOT LITERALLY DROOLING THINKING ABT HIM RN MY BABYWABY BOOBOO BEAR. THEY BUTCHERED HIM SO BAD AND IT PISSES ME OFF SO MUCH!!! AND LIVIO OH MY GOD WHY DID THEY DO THAT TO HIM??? HIS TRIMAX DESIGN IS OS FUCKING PEAK HE IS SO AMAZING AS AN EYE OF MICHAEL AND ESPECIALLY AFTER HE REFORMS AND BECOMES A COWBOY BABEYYY!!!! BUT NOOOO THEY MADE HIM AN UGLY ASS CYBERPUNK ASS BITCH!!! THEY MADE HIM SO FUCKING LAME AND BORING!!! PATOOEY I HATE HIS FUCKING DESIGN!!!! okay so wolfwood just showed up, can officially say hes the weakest version of wolfwood and that i do not like him. hes giving non sonic fan perception of shadow vibes. ALSO WHERE IS HIS MELANIN THEY TOOK IT AWAY!!! THE MELANIN VACCUM STRIKES AGAIN!!! tbf, he didnt have MUCH but he was a little brown, not literally just a white man

four, where. the. fuck. is. milly. i LOVE milly. she is one of my faves ever, im so sad she isnt here. genuinely...

five and probably last for rn, why is the pacing so bad. like its not good in trigun or trimax really, and especially bad in 1998, but it SO ASS!!! like its so blink and you'll miss it, which kinda stands for every trigun... but expected this to be like at least a liiiiittle better i dunno

conclusions: im gonna keep watching it maybe? but like... i dont like it. its bad imo. literaly have been into trigun for one week and am in mourning that trimax will likely never have a proper adaptation. i just wanna see angel knives in his full glory, not whatever tf tristamp is trying to push here

#rambles #trigun spoilers #trigun #trimax #tristamp #vin speaks

[autisticbokutoenthusiast]

ive been thinking about top nonstop for the past 24 hours and i can't help but wonder what his arc will actually look like

we're introduced to him in episode 1 as the top-tier. he's cool and confident, he's rich and hot and gets everything he wants and knows the answers to hard trivia quetions and charismatic as hell.

as the series goes on though we're introduced to other parts of him as well, that he has insomnia and has a hard time sleeping alone because he's scared of dying in his sleep alone and unloved, he won't/can't stick up for himself in various situations, he's pretty lonely, etc. he also hooks up with boston because of insecurity that mew is being genuine with him.

these things don't really negate the traits he's introduced with, he's still confident and cocky but post top/boston reveal it stops feeling cool and charismatic and starts seeming a bit desperate, and it doesn't get him whatever he wants in any given scenario anymore. I'd also say that compared to his introduction to the friendgroup, having the answers to the triva questions (i.e knowing the right things to say), following mew finding out about him having sex with boston we often see him speechless, or not speaking up for himself, especially when it comes to mew. it feels like since episode 6 at least, his smirk has been replaced with those sad puppy eyes.

now i'm one of those people that watches the show and thinks top did genuinely fall for mew and is genuine in his attempts to win him back, so i think it's interesting that the more love i see behind his actions, the less mew does.

I'd say the biggest effect on top's character is his relationship with mew/ mew's arc, because of how he agrees to change his lifestyle but also because of how he is framed. like in episode 2 top jumps in the lake to help cheum and mew notes it down as passing one of his boyfriend tests and when top jumps in to help mew in episode 9, its not received negatively but it doesn't but top immediately back in mew's good graces (actually i don't think we get mews thoughts on it at all cause he had just passed out but wtv). similarly top taking care of mew after his lasik surgery vs at the halloween party. i'd imagine that if top's interaction with mew's moms had happened pre episode 6 top would have gotten top marks from mew instead of being met with annoyance. theres probably many more instances like these but i'm starting to lose the point of this post the more i go on. (one last point is in episode 9 top is about to take some sleeping pills and decides instead to seak out human company, which could be just a way to introduce boeing to the story but i still think about it in terms of mew telling to to stop doing drugs, different drugs i know, in exchange for affection...anyway). we've seen the ways top has started to change but i don't think we've gotten as strong a sense as to where his character will go from here.

with mew we see him start out as the table holder, as the guy whose never been in a relationship but has a very clear image in his head of what it has to be like and when he finds someone who passes his tests and enters a relationship he thinks is perfect he ends up feeling betrayed and heartbroken. then we see mew lose his sense of self, enter his bad boy winning the idgaf war era and also what it takes for him to get out of it and start to come to terms with how he feels and why. we've seen who mew was introduced to us as, how he broke out of that mold, and where he may go next

boston was the hunter, who didn't do relationships because of all the drama. he becomes friends with benefits with nick and breaks his rule and starts to develop some feelings and it ultimately does lead to a lot of drama, mostly at the expense of his friendships. it seems tho that moving forward boston may re-evaluate his stance of relationships, not in favor of changing how he is necessarily but the value he places on other people and how he treats them.

ray is introduced to us the drunkard and guy with an unrequited crush. i personally will say ray is a bit different from these other characters because i think all of us ray enthusiasts clocked what layed beneath his surface almost immediately but nevertheless, he starts out as the guy who drinks too much when he goes out and gets called a burden by his friends for it, then we find out about his mother drinking herself to death, about his past suicide attempt because he feels unlovable and like he'll always be a burden, but we also see him try to move on with sand, to open up even, then get immediately roped back into his negative emotions in episode 6 when he self sabotages because self fulfilling prophecy, and we see things start to fall apart for him in episode 7/8 but pick back up in episode 9 with the prediction being the rest of his arc will revolve around dealing with his addiction and the impact that will have on his life.

i lost the plot of this post so bad someone please make coherent thoughts about this character cause clearly i can't. genuinely don't know what the point of this was supposed to be....

#only friends the series #only friends meta #top tanin #top only friends

[solardrink]

Oh? How’s the transformers looking? How stronger are your thoughts on the new transformers than other transformers, I actually only have a like vague idea on what transformers is so this is just an ask for you to infodump

Ary I’m gonna cry u wonderful person thank you so much for asking

Ok so this movie is rise of the beasts!! Michael Bay is not directing this movie and you can already tell the difference THANK THE LORD (the human companions are not deeply cringe and annoying for once)

according to the trailer (which released at 9 am this morning (I watched it after I finished my Sol (early btw))) the beastformers - transformers whose altmodes are animals like cheetah, [raptor bird I forgor], rhino, and gorilla as opposed to transformers who are vehicles like cars or jets etc.

The beastformers r like “help us out autobots! Earth is in danger!” And optimus prime, autobots boss, is like I am not losing the idgaf war “This is not our battle..” but obv smth changes and the autobots help out in fighting against the big bad UNICRON , the eater of worlds 🍽️

My thoughts on all the models :

- mirage looks amazing !! HOWEVER he is so clearly a Jazz ripoff ! (Jazz was the black va’d second in command to op in the g1 series who was a fan of humans and their music) not only does mirage looks like jazz, have a similar voice and aesthetic, the whole purpose of his character is to act as a bridge between the humans he’s fascinated by and his autobot friends , something, I’ll give credit, jazz didn’t specifically do

I’m not even mad about it tho that’s just an observation cause mirage seems so cool!! like a totally charismatic character I’m obsessed !

- arcee ! She looks so pretty !! Not as pastel pink as I’d personally like but she really does look great

She’s voiced by Liza koshy of all people and we didn’t get to hear her in the trailer so I’m super curious how that turns out

She’s got an acrobatic style of fighting and is so girlboss

- wheeljack (otherwise known as Pablo - bc that’s what’s written on his van form) looks interesting … he has a face that looks like a metal gigachad with defined lips let’s just say that

He’s missing his ear fins !!!! :( they showed up kinda ? in the twt trailer but idk it doesn’t look the same

He’s missing his mask too !! :( and he has big goggles for some reason ?? ig they’re really leaning into the nerd look

- bee looks cute , nuff said

- Optimus ! Optimus has his chassis with windows again!!! In my opinion anything that looks more like g1 designs is a win in my book

He looks good he sounds good - voiced by Peter Cullen again thank goodness! I’m super duper excited to see him

- the human companions !!

We don’t know much about them but I’m like really really excited, poc leads woo !!

In the few clips we’ve seen they’re not obnoxiously annoying the way the bayverse humans always are 🙏🙏 the main human guy seems to have a funny dynamic with mirage

with human companions in transformers media, it’s ALWAYS a hit or miss and most often misses

The only human companions that are good are Sari, Raf, Spike, the Burns family and Doc Greene and Frankie <- rescue bots is a phenomenal show

Anyway about the human companions for this movie I’m super charmed by them and I’ve got a good feeling about it

#transformers #transformers rise of the beasts #save

[jamzandbamz]

For you guys 💗💗 Vibes were like... a hot summer day energy, but with a bit of a cool breeze, too 😂 Kind of wobbly, like he's been in another world mentally, angry but also friendly, wiped-out, sore from Murph workout, still himself, generally open 😆

-He talked for 12 min without realizing it wasn't on, said "ohhhh my God, ohh my f'n God, I been doin, I been on here for...it's not funny guys...now I'm starting off mad." Def got very angry lol, banged the table a few times 💣 😂

‐Top Q was about patreon, overall acknowledged they've been slacking, mentioned failed vids in particular, not quitting patreon, said he thinks they overpriced it in the beginning, went into this blind last year, said "everyone in here I need to treat like equals (referred to godfather sitch)," gave an actual apology, said he appreciates everyone

- (detailed if you want it) Deleted his Murph workout ig pic bc a female friend (of Mike's) texted Mike about it, he screenshotted the convo, and sent it to Jeff. Her text was, "Oh what does this guy do, just work out all the time?" Jeff said in the live, "I dont want to be like that, I'm not doing this to make ppl feel like shit, I'm doing it bc I'm mentally ill and I hope that I can motivate ppl." Deleted the pic last night. Later added that he was insecure about it so deleted

**Said he was with a "friend" earlier today who asked him "what the goal is" in his life, "why do you work so hard to where you never have a personal life?" Later was like, "then SHE SAID---" He immediately acknowledged he was "admitting it's a girl," so chances are this is Georgie today. (his answer was: legacy, influence, helping ppl, having a positive impact on the world 🌎)

-"I don't have a gf if that's what you're asking, I'm seeing a girl, she's got me in a hold (or hole?), she has mind control over me" (I wouldn't read into this too much, she's not doing anything, he just really has fallen for her, early, like we already knew, like a lot of guys do it seems)

-Asked if he's "in love" now: detached/sarcastic vibe: "I'm in love with all of you" "I'm in love with my own self"

-Went to "Laguna bc a lot of shit was -" then got cut off by a Q (arghhhh lol)!!! Breezed through a later Q about what was bothering him before Laguna (said "um" then replied to something else, not mad tho, energy was open/maybe he didn't want to say)

-a mental health Q, his response: "rough times over past two weeks, idgaf about skin cancer, they'll cut it off, go in with lasers and burn in off, I've done 10 surgeries in the past year and a half"

-In Laguna, found out about Ray Liotta, teared up after it set in, growing up he felt like he wanted to be him (like his movie roles) cried bc this he had such an effect on his life 😥

----- Other non-essential items: 😂

-Looking at locations for studio space to start shooting the shop in there! A "fantasy factory," front will be a storefront, have a functioning barbershop on set, thry msy build another podcast set, build others up (maybe) like Steven and Kyle. He'll take a cut ✂️ (hehe) ofc 😂

-Trying to find a place for LA meet up, more of a live pod/show

-They lost the memory card/footage from the wedding and after that day, Jeff is understanding (accident)

-New items: VINNIE ep in 2 weeks or less, did do a vid on the failed miami vid (ooh)

-Said he used to be insecure about his feet, used to jam them into shoes to make them fit 😆

-Said some if his fave content to make is doing these live streams 🔮, apologized again for the beginning, said "I hope you dont hate me"

[seiyasabi]

The Scientist

(Hange (Hanji) can rearrange by guts tbh :P Lol, anyways, this is a Yandere Hanji x Female Reader story! It takes place in current time tho (same universe as Yelena). Also, idgaf how tall the creator says Hanji is. In this fic, even the tall girlies get to be shorter than Hanji. 

TW: kidnapping!, !drugging!, unwanted advances, stalking!, etc! 

Please proceed with caution! Also, I’m sorry if you can tell that this was in my drafts for a hot min. I started to write this when I first started this blog, and I just finished/revised it lol. ) 

“Hey, (Nickname!” Hearing the loud shout of a certain brunet, you jump about a foot in the air. As usual, Hanji decides to surprise you whilst you’re in the middle of something. 

Pulling away from the microscope you’re currently looking at, you put on a strained smile, “Yes?” 

Their one eye sparkles in a hopeful fashion from behind their glasses, one of her their fiddling with their eyepatch, “Sooo,” They draw out the o, seemingly trying to disarm you, “Are you free this weekend? There’s this suuuuper cool bar that’s just opening, and me and the others are thinking about going! It’s totally not a date or anything,” They pause to let out a loud laugh, “I think it’ll be fun! What D'ya say?” 

Forcing out a chuckle, you shake your head, “Ah, I’m sorry, Hanji, but I’m busy this weekend. I have a lot of samples I need to process for that upcoming court case,” You chew your bottom lip nervously, “I’m sorry. I hope you and the others have a good time, though!” 

A new voice is heard, butting into your conversation, “I can do those! I’ve been needing more hours, anyways,” Whipping your head in the direction of the voice, you silently curse. Fuck Armin for being so helpful! 

Hanji beams even brighter than before, clapping their hands together happily, “See! Armin can do that for you!” They lean in closer to you, their lab coat brushing against yours, “Come on, (Nickname), I’d be reaaaaally happy if you go!” 

An uneasy feeling pools in your gut, as an anxious sweat begins to bead at your brow, “I-uhm-I suppose I can go for an hour or two.”

“Great!” They grab your hands in theirs, squeezing them in a friendly manner, “The bar is called ‘Titan’s Wrath,’ and we’re meeting at eight on Saturday!” Releasing you, they pat you on the back, “See you later!” They run off, most likely back to the dry lab. 

After a moment of silence, you slowly turn towards the short haired blond man, “Armin, I’m going to kill you.”

He blanches at your blunt tone, flushing a bright red, “Wha-what?” 

You grit your teeth, tears starting to bead your eyes in frustration, “They’re the person I was telling you about! Hanji constantly harasses me, and you practically just tossed me into their arms! Why would you do that?” 

A look of pure terror and remorse appears of his face, “Oh my God, I’m so sorry. I-I didn’t realise that they were the person-oh my God, I’m so stupid. I-I really didn’t know! I’m so, so sorry!” You let out a quivering breath, hands clenched into fists to calm you down. 

“It-it’s alright. I never really told you who they were. Just never do that again, okay? If you need more hours, just tell me, and I’ll see what I can do,” The younger man sighs in relief, shoulders deflating. 

“I promise to never do that again!” You nod, blinking away your unshed tears, and smile at him. 

“Okay, then we don’t have any problems,” You laugh lightly, shaking your head, “Who would’ve thought our newest intern was the dry lab’s wing man?” He panics again, making you cackle good-naturedly, “Now, can you please grab the dilluter? I forgot to grab it from the fridge.”

-

Hanji, being the ever cheerful person that they are, set their sights on you the moment you were hired. 

But, if they came out with their feelings immediately, you’d just assume that they wanted to take advantage of you. 

So, they watched you. Writing down your likes and dislikes, your quirks, everything. Through their ‘research,’ they came to realise that you’re very good at your job. The wet-lab should be lucky that they have you… but they never give you the recognition you deserve! 

They bombard you with assignments, become upset when you don’t finish them in seconds (which is so unreasonable!), and hardly give you any time off! 

You don’t seem to mind, being the good girl you are, but Hanji sure does! 

So, they’d seek out the top graduates from the college nearby, and help them become employed at the lab. The newbies really helped get the load off of your shoulders, and once done, they decided to swoop in now that you had a decent amount of free time. 

It started at the vending machine- they’d asked you if you wanted to get coffee with them sometime. You said no, probably because you felt it wasn’t professional. After all, rumours would spread like wildfire if you went out with the lead lab tech of the dry lab! 

So, everytime they knew you had a weekend off, they’d approach you with new places to try. 

Be it a movie, a store, a concert- it didn’t matter. They just desperately wanted to have some time with you! 

But, you reacted the complete opposite of how you were supposed to. 

You’d pick up as many shifts as possible, most times going into over time, just to avoid the flamboyant lead. Whenever you saw them in the hall or by the break room, you’d turn in the complete opposite direction. If wet-lab needed to correspond with the dry-lab, you’d send your most qualified coworker to do so. 

It was saddening, to be honest. They love you so much, yet you refuse to even face them. 

But, thanks to that Armin kid, their plans can finally bloom into fruition. For once, you can’t escape the brunet’s advances! 

Because of that, Hanji made a note to the owner of the lab that Armin would make a good contribution to the lab after he gets all of his qualifications. 

-

Saturday night comes far too soon. 

Dressed in black skinny jeans and a cropped, white long sleeve, you stand in front of ‘Titans Wrath.’ Scoffing at how the bar sounds like a metal band, you make your way inside. 

Grabbing the door handle, you yank it open, immediately hearing loud rock music. Mentally patting yourself on the back for your observation, you step inside of the cool building. 

Looking inside, you see a large, double sided bar in the middle of the room, a stage and standing area just behind it. There are a few pool tables in the front area where you’re standing, along with double doors leading to a hidden kitchen. 

There’s also a lot of people inside. You can’t see Hanji or their friends, but seeing a band setting up on the stage tells you that they’re probably on the other side of the bar. 

Walking over to the steps leading down into the stage area, you try to ignore the leers of a few men around you. Maybe you shouldn’t have worn clothes that accentuate your beautiful figure. Peering around the corner, you see the scientist and their friends, an empty seat in between them and a large blond man, that you vaguely recall being the police chief of your city. 

Strolling towards them halfheartedly, you give yourself a small peptalk inside of your mind. Sure, Hanji has always been touchy-feely with you, sure, they’ve asked you out about one hundred times, sure, you run into them every time you leave the house, sure- 

“(Nickname)! You actually came!” The brunet’s voice is loud, loud enough to cut through the loud music and equally loud chatter. Forcing a smile onto your face, you give a small wave, suddenly uncomfortable with the line of strangers at the bar suddenly looking at you. 

“Yes, hello, Hanji,” When you’re close enough, you’re thrown into a tight embrace, their body practically molding into your own. They’re about a head taller than you, making it so your head is practically forced against their protruding collarbones. Hesitating slightly, you give them a soft pat on the back, trying to escape their suffocating embrace. 

“I’m so glad you came!” They release you just as suddenly as they grabbed you, putting a hand on the small of your back, and practically forcing you in between the blond man and themself, “(Nickname), this is Erwin. Erwin, this is (First Name).”

His blue eyes rake over your appearance, recognition appearing on his face, “It’s nice to see you again, Ms. (Last Name), especially under better circumstances.” 

You nod, thinking back on some high profile cases you met with him for, “Yes, it’s nice to see you again, Mr. Smith.” 

A loud scoff is heard from beside Erwin, the head of a short, dark haired man peeks around the broad chested man, “It’s about time you brought a respectful brat,” You have to stop yourself from flinching at his harsh tone, “I am Levi,” Opening your mouth to introduce yourself, he holds up a hand, halting you, “There’s no need for introductions, Shitty-glasses has gushed about the ‘pretty wet-lab scientist’ for months now.” 

“Oh, alright. It’s nice to meet you,” His lifts his whiskey on rocks in acknowledgement, before downing it with one swig. 

“Likewise,” After that, he turns towards a light brown haired woman, her high pitched voice is heard from where you’re sitting. 

“I’m sorry about that. The detective is very… unsociable.” 

“It’s alright, Mr. Smith. He kind of reminds me of one of my interns, Annie,” You say with a small smile, before your swiveling bar stool is forced around so you’re facing Hanji. 

“Sooo, you like the bar so far?” Their smile is somewhat pleading, and you can’t help but just go along with them. 

“Yes, this place is, um, cool. Very interesting choice,” They clasp their hands together with a pleased expression, as they somehow move closer to you than they already are. At this point, you’re worried that they’ll fall off their stool. 

“Right? Our residential emo boy found it, and we’ve been hooked ever since,” A loud ‘Shut up, Shitty-glasses,’ is heard from behind you, making the brunet laugh, “Let me order you a drink! I think there’s something that you’ll really like!” 

Opening your mouth to reject, it was seemingly too late, because the brunet has already waved over a punk-ed out bartender. You didn’t really hear what the drink is called, but the man sets to work immediately. 

It barely takes a minute for it to be finished, and the purple drink is suddenly in front of your motionless form. Looking up, the purple haired man winks at you, before turning his attention back to a speaking Hanji. 

“Anything she orders, put it on my tab,” He nods, before walking off to service another customer. 

Turning your attention back to Hanji, you try to persuade them to let you pay, “Thanks, Hanji, but it’s alright. I can pay for my own drinks-”

“Don’t worry about it; I asked you out, remember? And it’s the least I can do for harassing you for the past few months,” Startled by their uncharacteristically somber words, you nod in understanding. 

“Alright. Thank you,” They nod, before motioning towards your drink. 

“Try it! I’m sure you’ll like it!” Grabbing the cool glass cup, you bring it up to your lips, and take a small sip. It’s amazing. It tastes like (favourite flavour), and it goes down smooth. 

“You’re right, this is delicious!” They grin brightly, clapping their hands together in glee. 

“Great!” They motion towards the stage with their head, “The show’s about to start! Are you ready for a kickass night?” You laugh at their vigour, and nod. 

“You bet!” 

Maybe tonight won’t be so bad after all. 

-

You spoke too soon. 

It seems like you’ve drank too much, because you’re now feeling dizzy. Throughout the set, you’d ordered about five more drinks, and they seemingly hit you all at once. 

Hanji, who’s been watching you since your fourth drink, feigns shock at your unstable form. That Rohypnol they grabbed from work works quite well! Now they can see why it’s the choice drug for those awful, awful people. 

“Whoa there, (Nickname), it seems you’ve had too much to drink!” Hanji jokes, hands holding you steady on your bar stool. The only person from your group still at the bar is Erwin, but he knows they have it under control. As chief of police, he feels a bit of remorse, but he knows it's for the best. Hanji will take care of you, because, after all, you’re their only true obsession. 

“Wha-huh? Was’ happenin?” Hanji can all but coo at how cute you are. 

“Don’t worry, cutie. I’ll get you home safe,” Helping you to your boot clad feet, they send a knowing look to Erwin, who smiles in return. Wrapping an arm around your waist, they help you stumble out of the bar, and walk towards their car. Once at the passenger side, the brunet unlocks the door, and assists you inside. You flop onto their leather interior, eyes unfocused, and body movements random. Chuckling to themself, they buckle you in, not before pulling on gloves, and taking your phone, keys, and wallet off of you. 

Taking these items, they empty your wallet of its cash, and chuck everything into a nearby bush. Knowing that the cameras outside the building and the buildings surrounding the place are off, they feel at ease. If anything, they feel like your knight in shining armour. If they hadn’t taken you, someone else would’ve-you’re just too cute. 

Closing your door, and rounding the car, they slide into the driver’s side, before starting the car. Buckling themself in, they look at your out-of-it form, and smile. 

#yandere hange #hange zoe #yandere hange zoe #yandere aot #yandere aot x reader #hange x reader #hange supremacy #yandere attack on titan #attack on titan x reader

[immeya]

Remus and Sirius were in love, there’s no denying that.

However I wanted to make it even more ✨tragic✨ so I wrote this headcanon.

⚠️ TW internalized queerphobia for the sake of drama (I’m sorry, don’t hate me) ⚠️

Sirius Black gives me extreme levels of idgaf queer vibes. Like that man just doesn’t care… except, they’re in the 70s and he absolutely does bc he also wanna look cool and not being targeted. (This while in school and before joining the order) later he’s definitely this careless beautiful person who just doesn’t give a fuck because what’s the point of hiding when you can die the next day? And so he is the queerest wizard in the gang (openly)

Remus however… gives me this vibes of I wanna be straight so bad so I don’t care what I feel I’m gonna follow the normative. Which is sad but I headcanon him this way because of ✨trauma✨ and being rejected as a werewolf is enough. (I do however headcanon him as being demisexual panromantic) so he pretends he’s not having feelings for a certain fellow marauder but we know Remus, we know.

James is always accepting (of his friends) and I’m gonna ignore there’s more marauders for now.

So my headcanon for this marauders wolfstar dinamic is kinda sad and heartbreaking which makes sense because it’s the marauders era and we love suffering and pain🥰 also is the 70s and the context they lived in NOT the best, but they were all punks and rebels and I love them.

Sirius, I feel like he’d be this wannabe though guy during his early teenage years and will soften as times goes on… he’s always had a big heart tho

I feel like James is really accepting but also very prejudiced. He sees the good in rejects but he’s all black or white when he’s young so he just takes his version of the story. (He learnt tho)

Remus is baby, but don’t get it wrong… he’s 100% done w everyone’s bs all the time. He’s smart and all that, yes. He’s just not very good opening up… you know bc of the werewolf thing. So he’s definitely not into talking about his feelings.

I feel like Sirius starts developing feelings for Moony at some point and just never tells anyone… but like, James suspects it and is always trying to bring up the subject.

And then maybe one night they get drunk and Sirius finally takes a chance… but it doesn’t work bc Remus rejects him ??? (Shocking)

So they decide to ignore the whole thing but now is Remus who is constantly thinking about it and he’s like so confused because he’s straight ??? (He’s not)

And so he keeps on denying the whole thing but it never gets awkward or anything

And James keeps trying to be the matchmaker but just can’t seems to win because Remus insists he’s definitely straight (he’s not)

And so I feel like Remus kinda hooks up with Sirius more than once while being drunk or something,but then he pretends like he’s got no clue of anything (the poor thing) and that goes on forever

After POA shit gets weird… bc Sirius is back and Remus is still straight (he’s not) and he genuinely likes Tonks (yeah, I do like that ship… sorry not sorry)

But he’s always loved Sirius but won’t admit it

And then guess who’s wrecked about Sirius’ death and depressed and feels like he can’t love and he’s not ready for a relationship. (This why he keeps rejecting Tonks in HBP)

Yes, PAIN.

And so the tragic story of two best friends who fell in love but the world is sad and so is this. Bye.

#hp marauders #the marauders #wolfstar #wolfstar hc #wolfstar headcanon #sirius black #james potter #remus lupin #remus loves sirius #sirius loves remus #tale as old as time #the marauders era #marauders headcanon #tw internalized queerphobia #tw alcohol #tw drunk #Harry Potter #harry potter headcanon #marauders

[ilikedetectives]

Hi, did you play every AC game? If yes, in term of game plays which are the easiest? For someone without much experience in games, ty!

Not every AC game, because I can handle only so much of cookie cutter games at a time. Before I say more, lemme get this out of the way first: I played the Ezio trilogy back in 2018 because Da Vinci’s Demons was cancelled and I wanted more Da Vinci content and the white and red hoodie looks cool. In other words, I didn’t play the game because it’s called Assassin’s Creed.

The AC games I played so far, by the order of which one I play first. I’ll rate gameplay by my personal preferences (because it’s the only way I know how).

Ezio’s trilogy (AC2, AC Brotherhood, AC Revelations, played in 2018): decent parkour, minimal grind (just invest in the villa and you’re a millionaire in a day or two), very story focused (perfect balance of historical and modern plots). Decent combat. The golden years of AC and I agree.

Unity (played a few months after Ezio): good parkour, medium grind (bigger map and more items to upgrade, you still get to invest in properties so it helps). Time-saver items are on sale for real money aka MTX (ew). Combat is ok, not much difference since Ezio. Historical story is meh (I don’t care for Arnold because Elise’s story is more interesting) and they completely ditched the modern plot (you think Odyssey has little modern day plot, try Unity). Buggiest AC game I encountered and I played this game 4+ yrs after launch (hold on to that thought, keep reading). Ubi spent all of their time and budget doing the interior design (which is gorgeous btw) that they have none left to fix the bugs.

Black Flag (a few months after): chasing flying papers is my favorite activity to NOT do. Grindy af (no property investment). I can’t tolerate the controls for the ship so I hate everything that involves ship in this pirate game, except for sea shanties. You’ll have more fun playing this game as a pirate than an assassin. Combat feels the same since Ezio. Other mechanics are like Unity (understandable). Modern plot is minimal, but it makes bloodline irrelevant and there’s a....soul inside a computer server that wants to possess a human body, meanwhile said soul’s husband is a maniac who has unlimited reincarnations (realism, I know). Black Flag is the gateway game that convinces me that I should stop wasting my brain cells in “what kinda bs realism is dis?”

Odyssey (a month after launch, bought solely because of Kassandra also when I heard Odyssey is set before the creed, oh fuck yea I don’t need to sit through another rehash of Creed crap or at least minimal anyway): oh gods a breath of fresh air from the old controls where you have to hold R2 whenever you want to run and my fingers hurt sfm. Climbing is the best because the protag actually moves where you want them to move. MTX (ew). Grindy but because the combat and movements are smooth, best combat so far; I don’t see Odyssey as grindy because I enjoy my time playing (also Kassandra); I platinum the game on PS4 at around 130 hrs I think, could’ve been earlier but photomode. Fun quests that I giggle whenever thinking about them (I don’t remember shit about any quests in any other AC game, but then again Kassandra). People bitch about no parkour but who parkour in the 450BCE?!?!? Full disclosure: I never cared for parkour and never will. I stop caring for modern plot after how Unity and Black Flag handled it. Playing Odyssey makes me realize that I enjoy AC games more if idgaf for the AC aspect, rather, I play for the fictional historical tourism aspect. Just ditch the AC and voila, blue sky and fresh air. Playing Odyssey also makes me realize that I want a spin-off IP that focus on the Isu so we can go full fantasy. Do I need to say how pretty Odyssey is? lol

Origins (planned to play Origins first, but Kassandra. Also, I remember Amunet from AC2, but somehow we play as a dude in Ancient Egypt, I’m not too eager to find out, despite I prefer Egyptian mythology over Greek and I’d like to thank Yu-gi-oh for that): combat is clunky, heavy, and slow, though no need to hold R2 to run so phew. Grindy af. The bow mechanics is a decade outdated (Horizon Zero Dawn came out the same year and oh boi the difference is night and day, oh yea I played HZD before Origins. I get it the bow isn’t the focus but does it have to feel like Skyrim in 2017?). I’m glad I play this game for the Ancient Egypt (which is beautifully designed *chef kiss*) aspect and no more. 

Syndicate (I play this along side of Origins, still haven’t finished it though. Literally bought the game for Evie and I nut over Victorian fashion): combat is no different from Unity. Grindy like Black Flag and Unity. Story is meh in both historical and modern plot so far. Evie is the only reason I’m still trying to play this game. At least the Helix outfits are included in the Gold edition of the game. Victorian London is gorgeous tho.

Valhalla (only care for this game because Eivor. Tbh after God of War and Hellblade, idc for another Viking game): game is buggy af, buggiest AC game I’ve played. Combat is like Origins but worse: the only saving grace is the finishing move & the bow mechanic hasn’t been improved since Origin; I honestly would rather have combat from the Ezio games over whatever-this-is. You have to toggle a button to run now, which is dumb af because I miss Origins and Odyssey automatic run. They bring parkour back (because Vikings totally dig parkour back in the Dark Ages) as well as the-character-doesn’t-move-where-you want-them-to from the older games. Chasing flying papers from black flag is back, no thx. Looting enemies is useless, but hey you get to run around to look for a key or two or THREE to get some minimal amount of materials; so imagine if 2/3 of every chest in Origins and Odyssey are locked. Oh! You have manually pick berries/food to heal, no healing potion, wtf is this half-ass RPG shit? Side quests, oh sorry World Events, aren’t tracked in an open-world game (guess who hasn’t been doing these bitches?). Grindy af. I’m wasting my time looking at the skill points interface (you have 99 lv in Odyssey, 55 in Origins, 403 power in Valhalla. A game doesn’t feel like grindy if you level up every 2 quests for 403 times, does it? lololol). The useless SP tree is so massive that I just don’t use the skills I acquire because it takes too much time to find out which buttons to push to locate the 10 skills in this 403-dot clusterfuck, but the astronomy design is beautiful (gotta give credit when it’s due). Scummy practice from Ubi: releasing “time-saver” pack AFTER reviews are published. Also, who wanna bet there will be more mtx outfits than in-game outfits? Don’t worry, Ubi makes inventory management cLEaNeR for you *hands over 8 outfits for an RPG game*. The free event bugs tf out of your already buggy event, but hey, you’ll get a free outfit that’s a reskin of what you already have, teeheee be grateful. Eivor is amazing but by the gods playing this game is a chore. Tbh I only play Valhalla if I don’t feel like playing Ghost of Tsushima that day. Lastly, why is England so yellow like it’s Ancient Egypt?!?!? And why the sunlight moves faster than Eivor’s running at full speed? Which parts of this game does realism count?!?!?!?

Unsolicited opinion: GoT is an example of how an AC game should be and how DLCs should be handled, but with Ubisoft it will never be and I’m so fucking glad that it is Sucker Punch Prod which handles feudal Japan with utmost respect and realism. See how “honor” is handled in both games and compare the writing. Ubisoft should have announced ding dong AC is dead and create a new IP, but AC is their most financially successful franchise so expect more of this MTX, I mean, grindy RPG approach with minimal narrative. 

#every time I talk about AC I need to go play ghost of tsushima to cleanse myself #ask #anon #Assassin's Creed #ac2 #ac brotherhood #ac revelations #ac unity #ac black flag #ac4 #ac syndicate #ac odyssey #ac origins #ac valhalla

[drunklander]

Drunj!Der Yells About Outlander

Thoughts on Ep. 504

Let’s make this one quick, because tbh I really dgaf about Alicia and Isiah and I’m almost done with Maas’ new book so if any other’s in the Maaslander squad wanna chat about it, I have feelings.

They’re really dragging this Bonnet thing out, aren’t they. I mean, the books did too, but they could have, ya know, AdApTeD. Le sigh.

Hallo the house is the olde timey version of texting “here” when you get to your buddy’s place.

This episode could really be titled Men Suck.

I mean really. Roger? The Browns? Bonnet? Even fucking Elijah Ford manages to suck and we never even see him!

Jamie doesn’t suck much in this episode. Which is a nice change of pace for him. But he’s been headcanon’ed beyond recognition so whatevs.

Fergus doesn’t suck. Fergus is always the exception who can hang with the ladies because he’s cool enough to be in the good squad.

I just fucking love Fergus ok.

As someone who *hates* shopping, back in the day shopping seems like my exact version of hell.

Also, like, have these fuckers not learned their lessons about not communicating? They don’t need to fucking tell everyone the whole truth, but come the fuck on. They can at least give the Ridge Squad a heads up to not fuck with rando Irishmen who may show up.

I swear, they’re all so dumb it hurts.

Also, Bree, girl. You’re talking to an old Scottish lady. Maybe don’t shit on the Irish in a way that also directly applies to her.

Alicia was Mr. Darcy’s daughter on Ripper Street, right? She looks super familiar.

I’m offended on Fergus’ behalf that they’re wasting so much of his whisky with that leaky stopper, tbh.

Ah, toxic masculinity and patriarchal bullshit. Right up there with rape as my FaVoRiTe way to demonstrate that ye olde times sucked.

It’s like dialed to 11 this episode so obvi I spent the majority of it rolling my eyes.

The Jamie and Claire with the baby stuff was solid though.

And thank fuck they refer to her as Bonnie. Like, Diana is notoriously bad with names, but come the fuck on. Alicia Brown and Alicia Beardsley in like the same few chapters? THERE ARE A LOT OF NAMES IN EXISTENCE, DIANA. IT’S OK TO BRANCH OUT A BIT.

Every time something like this comes up, I remember that there’s another random Randall but like as a first name, I think, in the Gathering Without End. Because of course.

Fergus should really be a fucking diplomat. I mean really.

I am approximately 1000% over sing-alongs with Roger. Can we hang the fucker already so he can’t talk anymore?

Yay freedom! You know what goes well with freedom? An incestuous throuple. You do you, Beardsleys.

“You’re 14.” “Uh, I am clearly in my mid-20s.” “Nope, 14.” “Cool cool. Message received.”

“Congratulations, you work fast milord.” I JUST FUCKING LOVE FERGUS SO MUCH.

Seriously, this show needs more Fergus. Also more Fergus, Bree and Marsali bonding. Like, if we’re gonna have an episode about randos, we clearly could have better used the time to have the Fraser kiddos bonding.

“When in Rome...” STFU, Roger. Cosplaying your way through history like you’re on a fieldtrip isn’t cute. It’s fucking annoying. And you wonder why Jamie doesn’t like you. You are an eminently unlikable person.

Roger would def be the guest the hosts in Westworld want to kill.

The only good part about this side-quest is that there’s so much of Jamie telling Roger he sucks. And really, I’m here for any and all of Roger being told he sucks.

Ok but literalol at how badly Caitriona/Claire knocked over her mug. She like put it down fine and then tipped it over.

Oh hey, I wonder who that rando doctor who gives the weird advice is.

Lucinda is a cinnamon roll.

“Beauchamp, Randall, Fraser, now Rawlings? Ye have another husband I should ken about?” “Well, not yet, but you know your buddy who’s in love with you? Well...”

Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp Randall Fraser Randall Fraser Grey Fraser is a very respectable name.

DON’T MAKE FUN OF THE DRINK OF FERGUS’ PEOPLE, BROWN MAN.

Literally the whole time in Brownsville all I could think was fuck, I really don’t want them to do the ABOSAA bit with them next season but I know they’re gonna and I already don’t want to waste time doing fucking recaps.

I’m bored.

Fuck there’s still half an hour left.

“What sort of man would I be if I allowed a lady to sleep out with the militia on a cold, dark night?” Idk, the kind of man whose people kidnap and rape a lady? *preemptive rage intensifies*

I know I should be freaking out that Bree’s freaking out that Bonnet kidnapped Jemmy, but all I could think of is the old podsa ads for SimpliSafe.

The Ridge needs SimpliSafay.

I fucking hate this storyline with the passion of a thousand fiery suns, but I fucking love Marsali.

Omfg I know it’s Brownsville but them all being Browns is fucking like GoT shit. Like, diversify your gene pool, y’all.

Ok, glad there’s finally a Marsali and Bree scene. But I still wish they could hang and like chat about stuff like pals.

That being said, MARSALI IS A FUCKING SAINT AND I LOVE HER SO MUCH.

And of course, more violence against women. Because we can’t go two seconds without reminding the audience that the past is Bad and Dangerous for women.

Also, is Marsali still preggo? Which baby are we on? What time is it? How much longer is left in this season episode?

Cute of Claire to be like hey, Rog, Jamie’s trusting you with me! His favorite thing! Like Jamie’s not actually trusting Claire with his daughter’s dipshit husband.

Oh hey, remember how Brianna can draw Bonnet fairly accurately? Sure would be nice if there was a way to, idk, show those pics to folks on the Ridge. Just spit-balling here, but like, maybe giving folks a heads up would be a good idea. Kind of like how she fuCKING COULD HAVE DRAWN ROGER LAST YEAR BECAUSE TALKING ABOUT HER BOYFRIEND IS A NORMAL THING TO DO WITH FAMILY AND THEN WE WOULDN’T HAVE HAD ROGERGATE AND OMFG THE DUMB. IT HURTS SO MUCH.

Claire just fucking yeeted that baby lol.

For real though, literalol at Jamie like taking his coat off and being all dramatic as he prepares to... play DDR.

omega psi chi phi upsilon tau sigma rho pi omicron xi nu mu lambda kappa iota theta eta zeta epsilon delta gamma beta alpha

Drunk!Claire is back!

I fucking love drunk!Claire. So does Jamie.

The scene where they talk about raising the baby together is adorable. But also, like, Jamie, you’re grandparents now. All the good parts of parenting with none of the shitty parts! And y’all have been through enough shit in your lives that you deserve all the fluffy grandparenting!

“And Marsali and Fergus... Well, I’m sure they will keep the Ridge sufficiently populated if that’s what you’re worried about.” “ Yeah, that lass is with child every time Fergus lays eyes upon her.” WHERE IS THE LIE THO.

Joking aside though, they’d better keep giving Marsali more stuff to do than spit out babies. *aggressively side-eyes a certain author who DiDn’T lIkE wRiTiNg AbOuT kIdS*

Good on them for tweeting out the suicide prevention hotline. Literally the least they can do.

I’m barely really trying to give a shit about Alicia and Isiah, but alas, idgaf.

Literally the only good thing about this whole story line is Isiah being like “step the fuck off, you raging hypocrites” to Roger and Jamie.

#* #outlander starz #outlander 5x04 #drunj!der yells about outlander

[backbendersokka]

the new one you reblogged.. can i... can i say 1-50 barring the ones that need my input?

cat you are KILLING me

1. who was the last person you sent a text to?

aghfasdah cat lmao

2. who was the last person you said ‘I love you’ to?

cat again ajhfdghasfd

3. favourite type of weather?

warm but with a breeze or a little rain

4. what’s your zodiac sign? do you relate to it?

cancer and YEAH KINDA

5. showers or baths?

i love a good bath but i don't have the time 

6. favourite movie? (outside of mcu)

Bumblebee and Front Cover

7. favourite colour?

GREEN and maybe light blue 

8. person your closest to in your family?

my sister even tho shes a bitch 1 like=1 prayer

9. last movie you watched?

Bumblebeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

10. show you’re currently binging?

none but the last one i binged was Lucifer

11. what’s your lockscreen?

a photo of me and my friend dressed up for my country’s version of Halloween

12. f*ck, marry, kill (pick three people)

fuck lucifer, marry mazikeen, kill chloe  (aka my favourite characters from lucifer)

13. opinion on...

trump succ you guys should impeach him like peasants would overthrow their terrible disgusting king

14. a celebrity you hate?

don't think I have one

15. a celebrity you love?

Rdj bitch this is a tony stark stan blog do you expect anything else

16. a character you relate to the most?

uhhhhhhhhhhhh, noone??? idk

17. someone you’re looking forward to seeing?

my best friend Dora

18. what does the last text you sent say?

‘I KNOW HON ILY TOO’ at cat

19. do you believe in true love?

meh

20. have you ever been in love?

nah

21. if your ex texted you now how would you react?

you couldn't live with your own failure and where did that bring you? back to me

also whats up lucas long lime no see 

22. baths or showers?

already answered

23. summer or winter?

summer

24. favourite memory from this year? (so far)

hanging out with my friend Niki shes very cool  

25. favourite food?

NOODLES

26. put your music on shuffle and say the line you like most in the song

BULL RIDIN’ AND BOOBIES COWBOY HAT FROM GUCCI WRANGLER ON MY BOOTY

27. last book you read?

im currently reading ‘the five kingdoms’

28. can you sleep if there’s noise?

ya

29. bad habits?

adopting internet humor irl

30. one regret you have?

being born

31. one bad thing that happened that worked out in the end?

fighting with some bitvh i hate

32. earliest memory?

my sister breaking my bottle when i was a baby on a porch in corfu

33. what do you want to do when you leave school?

make MONEY 

34. what’s stressing you out right now?

nothing this hoe is chill 

35. ever been drunk or high?

no i hate alcohol and drugs arent that common when you hang around with the right people

36. favourite type of clothing?

jean shorts

37. most expensive thing you’ve ever bought?

70 euro earrings but technically the money were my aunt’s

38. give me a song and I’ll tell you who it reminds me of (character or real person)

(pumpkins scream in the dead of night) young tony stark cuz he a rebellious hoe  

39. who do you miss right now?

no one being alone is nice

40. have any siblings? are you close to them?

my sister and were close

41. tumblr friends or irl friends?

they have their pros and cons but i must say irl friends have a LOT more drama than tumblr friends take that as you will

42. do you want kids?

maybe adopting not really a fan of pushing a watermelon-sized object out of my v-gg

43. do you want to get married?

sure idgaf

44. describe your dream girl/boy

dream girl: think Megan Rapinoe, Miley Cyrus and Anna Fang from mortal engines

dream boy: agfgafdsasjaf bicep 

45. one place you’d love to visit?

London

46. what’s on your bucket list?

sky diving

47. are you outgoing or shy?

a very weird mix of both

48. one piece of advice you live by?

i have two actually

(1) if it can be solved dw about it

(2) if you won't care in 5 years don't care now

49. how tall are you?

5′2

50. anything you want to ask!(why does professor membrane suck)

his shoes are wack

#For everyone scrolling I'm so sorry #fani answers #that's my wife #ask game answers

[xserpentlife]

3.16  Reaction - SPOILERS

Raw reaction no editing to this so it is not grammatically correct and spelling is not checked.

Hermione madddd

Kevin’s sellin it 

Ooooo we gettin in already 

Awwww noooo Reggie quit

Ooooooooooo Josie did that 

I’m living for this honestly like 

ok little dance sequence

SWEETS SAMG OKE SMALL LIKE AND IM ALREADY LIKE MY BOYYYYY

the sass in sweets saying bad boy love interest has me rolling

Betty is sooooo done 

CANDY STORE 

OKAYYYYYY

OKAY TONI DANCE BATTLE HELLO 

ORGANIZING SWEET PEAS SOLO EVELYN YOU SAY THAY YOU BETTER FOLLOW THROIGH I MAY HATE YOU BUT ILL HATE YOU MORE 

ransacked tent city ok

Why TF are they seperating wth 

O SHIT DIS HE FIND OUT 

ima take a bath ok you do that

PARTYYTY

Okay yeah let’s hello shot woth blue jello, does anyone else thinksnit looks like what’s been killing everyone like wtf

Okay dancing 

Veronica and Reggie oo

PEA AND FANGS MY BBYS the bromance

SWEETS MADDDDDD

Cheryl salty

I’m living hoenstly likeeeee

OH VERONICA AND REGGIE

endgame 😂😂😂

Organic brownie w/ mushrooms HE BOUTTA BE TRIPPPPIN

POOR KEV OMG 

Evelyn you ain’t s therapist sit the fuck down 

dude you ain’t haunted

Pooor fangssssssss awwwwww

Side note fsngs arms helloooo

SWEETS DID THATTTTTTTT OOOOO SHITTTTTTT NAMES AND EVERYTHING OKAYYYYYYY

DUDE REGGiE JUST USED “all in” I’m sorry conspiracy that him and sweets are related like not That I believe that but wth

Look at Reggie being the smart one 👏🏼

The fuck Evelyn tf you tellin Cheryl poppopin oit like thsy 

Oh Christ 💋 I’m red 

Wtf Cheryl chill girl 

DEAD GIRL WLAKIKG MY FAVVV

SWEETS BETTER SING A PARTTT I SWEARRRR

OKAY FLSNNEL OFF OH MY GOD IS THIS ABOUT A THREESOME JESUS CHRIST AND WITH TONI WHAT IN THE ACTUSL FUCK

BELT OFFFFF HOLY FUK 

IMA NEEES SOMEOKE TO MAKE GIFS OF THAG LIKEEEEE NOWWWWWWW THIS SECOND LIKE HOLY SHITTTTT

o my

Is that literally them counting him as being in dead girl walking cause he literally said waht two words wtf 

SELECT REHEARSAL EVELYN I SWEAR 

fangs ughhhhhhhhhh

Yo they boutta kisss

YEA DREW SIG YOUR SO GOOOOD HOLY CRAPPPPPPPP

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THEY KISSED WVEN THOUFH I HATW THAT THE FARM THE KISSSSS THO

yo wait though are they married now or like etc was that some induction thing like whatbis happeneing 

You real sweaty there arch 

Oh so now the pricinple w/ the farm tooo 🙄

They goin to junkyard Againn

A real conversation thank godddddd

Awww the trailer 

Is sweets boutta sing????? Nope didn’t think so false hope it’s cool

SEVENTEEEEEEN

Kinda llivimf for Betty and jug in this moment thooo OH GOT THE CSNT WE BE SEVENTEEN HARMONYYYYYY

I’m just gonna say this cute and shit but your dancing in a literally drug lab so maybe get out 

Poor Jug tho 

Betty like Jughead let it go and he’s like never heard that 

Veronica cryin hiram Max affffff

He brought his painting 😂😂😂

Is it bad I kinda don’t care bout her solo like I’m glad but also other people should’ve had solos *cough* sweet pea *cough*

I mean it’s good tho like not gonna lie 

HOW IS THIS ALREADY 50 MINS IN LIKE WHAT

Tweaked out fizzle head 😂😂😂😂

Oh stfu Gladys you liar 

She has to know what he’s planning like Gladys ain’t dumb 

The backstage thooo 

Ew sweets don’t sign her shit 

Fangs jumpin is cute af tho 

Jug is like My line he’s like WTF 😂😂😂

Burn it downnnnnnnn

Sweets and fangs BETTER SING IN THIS I SWEAR 

CAN WE STOP PANNING OVER THE COFE FOUR LIKE IDGAF I WANNA SEE OTHER PEOPLE

FUCKING EDGAR EVERNEVERRRRRRRR Jesus Christ thaycidna lot of fuckin farm people this is weird as shit 

Everyone’s like wtffffffffff

That’s it

I feel cheated first the fuck of all Jordan plays Fucking JD and barely sings two likes like wtf also why the fuck have we not figured out NM

Thank god he isn’t dead tho but let’s be honest it may be false hope so who tf knows 

#riverdale #riverdale reaction

[sleepymccoy]

Hey hey! Sorry to be a bother but do you know any interesting books (more like non-fiction but not scholarly but any fiction is good too!!) that I could get for my dad? He’s read so much that I struggle !

Fair enough! My dad and I swap sci fi books really, so I dunno how much non fiction I’m gonna come out w here but I’ll try!

There’s always The Martian, it’s definitely fiction but it has a lot of fun and legit science in it, but it’s super popular so he’s likely read it. The sequel also has science in it but in my opinion it’s not as strong

If you can find a book on the planet Vulcan, that’s a fun little pocket of space discovery history that a lot of people don’t know about (we thought there was a planet called Vulcan near Mercury, turns out it’s just gravitational time dilation) but I don’t have a specific book recommendation there

Some original Asimov is always fun, but again he’s likely read that. Have a look at his book shelf cos Asimov wrote a fuck tonne so there’s maybe something you can be sure he’s missing. Asimov, if you don’t know, was like mid 1900s and wrote a lot of speculative fiction on what the future of robotics would be like

If he’s enjoyed Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy I recommend The Rook, it’s not very sciency, but it has some cool modern sci fi fantasy stuff that I enjoyed a lot, and has the same kind of surprising humour that Hitchhikers had (this is my favourite book btw)

I found a good thing to get myself once was a very basic overview of physics, like something aimed at beginners, just to make sure I had my starting point down right (cos I read into a lot of funky stuff rather than the basics) so you could buy a more cheerful and simple book about something he’s deeply into, if he has a niche interest like that

I bought my dad a copy of Napoleon’s notes and opinion on the Waterloo campaign (translated and edited down a bit) cos I thought that point of view could be interesting. I also read it because idgaf about Napoleon, but dad does, so part of the present is that he and I can discuss the book

Ancillary Justice and the sequels is a series that dad and I discuss a lot because the main character has no gender and the various cultures in the book have complicated relationships with gender and pronouns. It’s some pretty intense sci fi (the main character is also an ai) so it’s a really really interesting series, but if he’s not into sci fi then this is not a good starting point. If gender nonconformity is something you wanna throw at your dad, that’s an awesome one

I don’t know what country you’re in so this might not be of interest, but there’s a  book called Terra Nullius that tells the story of the invasion and genocide of Aboriginal Australians through the lens of sci fi. It’s written by an Aboriginal author and it’s really intense, they don’t hold back, but the white invaders are described like incomprehensible aliens. It’s a really good pov to take. I dunno if it’s more political than you wanna get for Christmas tho (altho my dad bought that for me last Christmas, so it’s not inappropriate at all imo)

You can also go to a second hand book store and get a really nice hard cover book that looks like his kinda vibe (that’s what I did w the Napoleon book I picked up, it’s super cute) 

There’s also those art books, like a big fancy book full of photos of deep sea creatures, or arty photos in Antarctica, or drift wood or whatever. If you find one like that that’d suit him then it’s a nice kinda thing to keep at your desk or in the living room to look a bit fancy but it’s really just pretty

I hope I helped!!

#book recs #sleepy speaks #christmas

[explode-a-pult]

All the Hogwarts Mystery asks 🤗

1. Did you use your real Last Name in the game or not? Why?

yeah, well–i used jay, but I used my real last name lol 

2. Which house did you take and why? (Any back stories why you took it?)

I chose Ravenclaw!~ I mainly chose it because I am a Ravenclaw in like…every quiz I’ve ever taken? thats a lie I’ve gotten slytherin before a couple times

3. Opinion on Rowan?

they’re just a pure lil ravenclaw like they were made for ravenclaw idk why they didn’t keep them in ravenclaw but anywho~ i adore them–i mean, they’re a lil nerd and a bit lame in what they think is ‘cool’ but i still love em

4. Favourite character so far and why?

hmmm idk i mean, everyone is in love with penny or bill but i’m just meh on it all…i love good ol’ minnie the most, probably lol (I can’t spell her name I’m dumb I know shhhhh)

5. Who did you take with you on the first adventure to discover what’s behind the door and why? (Did you take Penny or Ben. And if you haven’t come that far, who do you plan to take along with?)

I took Ben because I didn’t have enough friendship for Penny UnU

6. Which character are you most excited to meet in the game? (This can be characters that haven’t appeared in your friend list, for example Charlie Weasley)

Tonks, probably~ Or even the twins, who are supposed to come in your seventh year

7. Have you heard any theories about the game? If so, which one?

Nope! 

8. Opinion on Merula?

uUuuuuuuUUUuuggggh just malfoy as a girl tbh like so in love with my character but so repressed… she’s pretty annoying tho too, sometimes like gurl just leave me alone and let me solve this mystery–OR help me solve it since you want to figure it out so bad like bruv chill… also, that hair? what is it? why do you have one streak? 

9. Favourite teacher?

I love McG the mostest even if i can’t spell her name flitwick is a close second tho

10. What do you think about your Prefect?

fucking annoying ass chester that motherfucker i fucking hate him omfg i wanna sock him in the face always fucking ‘didn’t lose more house points did you?’ ‘you haven’t gotten in trouble recently, i’m impressed’ like bITCH get on my level i’ve got the house up 60 points over the second place house BY MYSELF like brooooo i’ve earned over 200 points this year alone and i’m only half way through second year bUT NO, I LOSE 40 POINTS ONCE AND NOW I’M A TROUBLE MAKER, fuck you chester you lil shit. cursing slytherins when they’re not paying attention ass, not doing shit for the house ass, always on my ass ass… also, making me feel bad for not being able to volunteer for that slytherin altercation side quest, fuck yooooouuuu 

so yeah. that’s what i feel for my male prefect. never met my female one yet.

edit: I was being nice. I got us 93 points ahead of the second place gryffindors.

11. Do you care about your brother Jacob? Why?

idk I guess I do? I just think ‘what if it were renee/ray/my other siblings’ and i’m like i would be surprised they did this bec they’re all fuckin introverts and not really ambitious enough to try find something enough to break rules? so it’s like…eeeehhhhhh i try to care but I’m more interested in like, being at hogwarts tbh

12. Are you more interested about Vaults or what happened to your brother?

probably what happened to my brother, because like…it drove him mad? what did it? watch, the vaults are just gonna be some stupid thing like the philosophers stone or s.t that’ll get moved at the end and that’s why the cursed vaults were never brought up in the books xD

13. Hogwarts Mystery or The Cursed Child? Best story so far?

I never read the cursed child bec fuck that. i’m not reading about a kid named albus severus like lmaooo

14. Any ideas what can have happened to your brother?

nope! merula says she knows but she’s not telling like the lil bitch she is. says he hasn’t got much time now so like??????????? is he dying?????

15. What do you hope you will get to do in the game?

uh romance people and actually fly around and duel more and actually get to befriend people without having to do stupid side quests like bruv

16. There is a lot negative about the energy bar, can you give something else about the game that you think is really positive? Can be anything!

you get to go to hogwarts, what’s the big issue? stop complaining about shit yo like have you tried other energy based games? shits ridiculous, especially in the money grubbing ones like kim k’s or even in the idol ones or those otome games like goddamn they’re expensive once you start hitting higher levels because you’ll end up needing gems and shit to refill your energy, meanwhile this one is every hour 50 you get a full bar again 

17. Some stuff have appeared in the game that they never had in the movies, what are you happy have appeared in the game?

peeves is cool. you get an energy from tapping on him. also, depending on which house you choose, you get to see what they look like…also also you get to go to different areas that weren’t in the movie like filch’s office and shit, also hogsmeade is available in third year so i’m excited for that

oh, also! spells! like spongify seems like i’d use it all the time bec squish

18. Can you think of a song that suit to the story?

do you believe in magic

lol jokes idk not off the top of my head

19. How has the game affect your life? (is it hard to play because you’re at school/job? Has it affect your sleep schedule? Affect your phone?)

it really hasn’t affected me in any way other than having a new game on my phones? idk i guess it does take some time outta my life but i usually stick to 1 hour missions because that usually depletes my energy for two hours but i get like 40 attribute points or 1000 coins because i force reset the app when i get rewards so it takes maybe 20 minutes a mission? 

20. How many have you told about the game?

i saw the tweet about it and went BOI, screenshot it and sent it to my sibs group chat and was all ‘fi you think i didn’t download this immediately’ and then showed my neph tex it when he asked what i was playing and he downloaded it and apparently my bro-in-law has it but idgaf about that but anyway yeah…

21. Who do you think Barnaby Lee is and what do you think he has purpose in the game?

i think he’s bae tbh 

lol fuck watch it being my brother using polyjuice to try find the vaults again aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh 

#hogwarts mystery #hogwarts mystery asks #ask meme

[activatingaggro]

> SIPARA: Contact your boy.

-- activatingAggro [AA] is now trolling refiningSpacetime [RS]! --

AA: phernes. phernes, what the actual   F U C K   did i just rnead? AA: what the fuck is going on? RS: RS: | Sipara | ! | RS: | Hello | ! | AA: no, fuck you, A N S W E RN      M E. AA: what the hell has kilrnan been   S A Y I N G? RS: | I See You've Been Reading | AA: no shit!

RS: | Um |

RS: | Would You Believe Me if I Said | This was An Exaggeration | ? | AA: 'kay, we'rne, like, joking herne, and that's cool. i'm down w/ the jokes. i'm a cool kid. AA: you have thrnee lines, and then i'm going to go find kilrnan, and see how prnetty he is when  H E ' S   on the grnound, how's that? RS: RS: | Sipara | AA: phernesss. AA: how long has this been going on? AA: and why didn't you   T E L L    M E?

RS: | Because You Would Panic | Exactly Like This | RS: | You Saw What I Said | ! | I Have It Handled | AA: since when is this shit getting drnagged out into public handled? AA: and why won't you answern my qs??? AA: phernes. AA: P H E RN E S. AA: come the fuck  O N. RS: RS: | It's Fine | AA: why do you think that'll fucking  W O RN K? AA: it's not fine. AA: it's not fine, and i wish you would stop pretending, for fucking once! AA: like, just AA: just AA: let me H A N D L E  this, for once! RS: | Sipara | RS: | Shoosh | AA: RS: RS: RS: | Um | RS: RS: | Should I Call Hadean | ? | AA: AA: wtf,  N O. RS: | Okay | RS: | Kilran is Just | A Bother | Alright | ? | RS: | He is Nothing to Worry About | He is Just Another Lowblood | Looking to Take Out His Frustrations with Life | on the Only Person Who is Below Him |

AA: yrn not convincing me not to murndern him.

AA: look, idgaf if he wants to take it out on his fucking  L U S U S, but yr not -

AA: i’m not going to have ppl treating you like  S H I T.

RS: | Yes | Well | I Don’t Exactly Like It | Either | Which is Why I Am Not Letting It Happen | And | Well | He Does Have His Reasons | But |

AA: he can take every single one of his fucking reasons and cram them up his wastechute, right before i fit my goddamn boot in there.

AA: i. don’t. care.

AA: he doesn’t get to  T A L K    T O   Y O U  like that. and, like, how many times has he done this?

AA: how many points do i have to fucking make? because just let me fucking know, pheres. dude’s got a mouthful of teeth, i will make him eat one for every single time he’s stepped out of line, and use the rest to carve it in his skin until he  L E A R N S.

RS:

RS: | Sipara |

AA:

AA: okay. okay. shooshing.

RS: | Thank You |

RS: | But | He is Focused On His Appearance | RS: | You Know How He Is |? | Very Saccharine | and Cloying | ?| AA: yeah, kind of fuckin' noticed. RS: | He Enjoys That Image | I have Tarnished That Image | RS: | And If He Continues to Bother Me | He Will Risk Having More Dragged to the Light | RS: | He Does Not Want That | RS: | He Cannot Afford That | RS: | So | I am Fine | AA: and if you arnen't? AA: what if he gets, like, hella fucking pissed, and he's like, n, fuck you, i ain't gonna deal w/ this sitting down? what if he decides, n, thrneats arnen't making his fucking point, he's gonna carnve it into yrn  S K I N? RS: | Well | RS: | Um | If He Does | RS: | You Can Cull Him | RS: | How is That | ? | AA: AA: okay. AA: that's bettern. AA: i'd like to do it   B E F O RN E. AA: but. okay. AA: RS: | Do Try to Relax | AA: i am so rnelaxed. AA: i'm even quirnking. look at this shit. prnime-time rnelaxed. RS: | Yes | Well | Uncurl Your Fists | You are Going to Blemish Your Hands | AA: AA: okay. RS: | Sisi | I Promise | I Have This Handled | RS: | I am Sorry I Didn't Tell You | RS: | But | Um | That's Because | AA: i would've frneaked out, rnight. RS: | | Because I Had It Handled From the Start | ! | That is All | RS: | And Because You Would've Panicked | Yes | AA: if he trnies to hit you up again, tho. AA: you'll tell me, rnight? RS: RS: | Absolutely | AA: okay. AA: AA: i still wanna cull him, jsyk, but. 'kay. i'll let you trny yrn thing. that's fiiine. and if it doesn't wornk, then we get to trny  M Y   thing. 'kay? RS: | Ah | I Hear You | AA: that's not what i said. 'kay? RS: RS: | 'Kay | AA: 'kay. AA: i

AA: need go take a brneathern. AA: peace.

-- activatingAggro [AA] is no longer messaging refiningSpacetime [RS]! --

#brightest shade of sun #bwic #[chat]

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Carly

Ali: save me Ali: this practice is dragging Carly: survive it & i'll help you forget you had to Ali: reckon i've only just come down Ali: but this sesh is making that happen hard and fast 😩 Ali: how's you Carly: aw baby no Carly: say you caught stage fright off me & you gotta leave rn k Carly: i was still up before i got brought down too Ali: dead believable Carly: i kno Ali: can't even blend into the furniture 'cos there is none Ali: so grunge rn Ali: unacceptable tho, who's bringing my baby down Carly: lie on the floor Carly: as protests go itd get the mood across Carly: ronan is Ali: yeah, 'less they think i'm about to go all acdc on 'em Ali: shouldn't have needed to ask but there we are Ali: what's got his knickers in a twist today Carly: wtf does that mean Carly: a load of his cousins are back on site Carly: fun Ali: oh babe Ali: missing out Ali: i'll show you, not at this rehearsal but when i'm actually bringing my rockstar a game Ali: omg is bartley there Carly: k Carly: yea he is Carly: so im not Ali: fun times Ali: i'd rather him over ronan but you do you Carly: if i wanted a bf Carly: but nah Carly: & hes not over it Ali: 😬 Ali: come to grab you Ali: awks Carly: yea Carly: like i kno im good thats why i cant save it all for you boy Carly: wife your own Ali: thought they weren't allowed to wife gorjas anyway Ali: tuttut Ali: you just out here tryna be community spirited Carly: yea im just living like one of you don't get it twisted lads Carly: cant make it clearer than fucking your cousin at your bday party Ali: damn Ali: stone cold boo Carly: told him how it had to be but he didnt wanna hear it Carly: had to show him instead you kno Ali: i get it, did the same but in reverse Ali: its cultural but its a bullshit excuse Ali: don't answer to anyone, so they don't like no, like Carly: yea? Carly: how fun Carly: like i dont answer to anyone either lads Ali: mhmm, you know how weird he got ick Ali: forreal Ali: my ma might say otherwise but shh Carly: mine wouldnt Carly: out here making her proud Ali: pop that on the next postcard Ali: glad you ain't here, lads Carly: ha Carly: wish you were tho you could distract Barty for me Carly: the grass is too wet for creeping Carly: fall on my arse Ali: poor baby Ali: i'd throw myself on that dick bomb for you Ali: lene can't even be mad Ali: loves chivalry Carly: aw Carly: youre too good Carly: i kno i should just go out there like idgaf but looking like this Carly: not gonna do me any favors Ali: like you're so 😍 there's gonna be a riot or you looking how you feeling Carly: wanna say yea to the first 1 but got the weight of last nite on me Ali: fuck this Ali: i'm coming and i'm bringing concealer Carly: might start a riot at rehearsal baby Carly: but idc if you dont Ali: nah, explained Ali: basically a feminist emergency Ali: how could they refuse Ali: don't need to mention we're gonna turn looks and party Carly: ha Carly: [sends selfie] Carly: thats what im working w Carly: emergency it is Ali: nah you still cute Ali: cuter than them, that's a given but i'll bring all my shit Ali: love a makeover moment Carly: youre so sweet Carly: love a happy lie Ali: no lies bitch Carly: ha k bitch Ali: a bitch better believe me Ali: imma make you when i'm through, don't worry Carly: you do have talent Carly: ive seen that Ali: 😉 Ali: tell you it's all natural or take the compliment hmm Carly: nobodys lashes look that good w out help Carly: but when i can see the freckles i kno you not going hard like Carly: so cute Ali: now who's the sweet one, shortcake Ali: 😊 Carly: facts baby Carly: im just saying 'em Ali: touche Ali: well your eye and hair colour combo is killer and we gon flaunt that Carly: its gonna clash w my skin if you keep making me blush boo Ali: nah, save your blushes for me Ali: stone cold fox, remember Ali: they'll never know Carly: dont let your gf kno Carly: dont wanna get grabbed by her either k Ali: 😂 Ali: she'll be gutted but cool with me Carly: love a 3way but Carly: she still scares me Ali: She's a pussycat really Carly: w you Carly: cuz youre cute Ali: so are you Ali: just a #confirmedstraight Ali: she can't be too nice, like, think of her rep Carly: ha Carly: tell her how many girls ive fucked Ali: tempting as it is to spice up the pillowtalk babe Ali: can't deal with the male gaze rant again 🙄 Carly: like you dont kno how to shhh her Ali: 😏 Ali: easy as a lad, like, but don't tell Carly: facts Carly: like i said you have talent baby Ali: backatcha Ali: for a straight girl, like 😘 Carly: ha Carly: yea lads arent no trick Ali: like you said you've fucked loads of girls too Carly: idk tho didnt stick around to tell me how it was Ali: hmm Ali: have to ask for a review next time Carly: fuck no Carly: might as well go to school and flunk that like Ali: awh baby Ali: how you expecting to learn anything 'bout treating a girl right from ronan Carly: idc Carly: as long as the lad is feeling what im doing Carly: & they do Ali: no doubt Carly: too much in bartys case Ali: hard life being a bad bitch Carly: ha you kno Ali: are any of his other cousins cute Ali: get the full set Carly: yea Carly: most are Ali: back again to homewreck hey Carly: couple are old but would Ali: shame i'm 💍 and they probs are too Carly: ha yea Carly: you could end yours w a txt but them nah Ali: you reckon? 😂 Carly: whats she gonna do Carly: show up here Carly: ill be like i dont share bitch Ali: probably Ali: shotgun toting da's don't scare her as much as they should Carly: k ill remember that Carly: hope mine dont show for my own reasons Ali: would probs scare off bart but also all the others Carly: youd think but hed just have a beer w them & b matey matey Carly: reckon hed sell me for a case if he could Carly: ship sailed w my virginity tho Ali: bummer really Ali: who knows what we coulda got outta that deal Ali: giving it away willynilly ugh past me Carly: they might wanna go harder for round 2 Carly: youre more talented now Ali: nice salespitch, babe Ali: i'm impressed, idk if they will be but worth a shot Carly: they would Carly: not that stupid Carly: & youre that cute Ali: like i'll wanna go with them when their chat is gonna be nowhere near as nice 😋 Carly: aw Carly: well you got me Carly: marital bed whenever Ali: but of course 😂 Carly: youre meant to laugh me into bed not out Ali: yeah and you're meant to wanna be there babe so it's chill Carly: k yea true Ali: even with my talents Ali: no turning water into wine, like Ali: sadly Carly: not w that attitude baby Ali: yeah being a debby downer's your only turn-off Ali: my ego thanks you, babe 😉 Carly: i'll work on the rest of you thanking me when you get here Ali: bitch... 😳 Ali: least it gon' be equal when I slay your makeover Carly: ill be grateful you kno Ali: i know