#I don't think it's overstimulation

[ssshh-im-a-secret]

I feel wrong

I don't know why

But I do

I feel wrong like somethings wrong in the room I'm in but I don't know what

It's WRONG and I don't know how to fix it

#relatable #mental health #mental illness #is this weird? #is this normal #is this relatable #is this an adhd thing? #it feels like an adhd thing #possible adhd #someone tell me what this means #what is wrong with me to feel like this #I don't think it's overstimulation #or understimulation #maybe it's because I've been feeling shitty all day anyway

[sciderman]

I swear I have read your big post regarding Peter Parker's neurodivergence and why it is best to avoid labelling him, but he definitely has a weird brain

Can't find it and feel kinda sad about it cuz I deeply related to it

i know exactly which post you're talking about and i can't find it either! i've raked through my archive, and it's just - nowhere to be seen. i think tumblr eated it (it happens.)

really, tumblr's search functionality is so so useless, i don't know what to tell you. there are plenty of keywords i can search to find it that post, but the search functionality actually just does not work!

undiagnosed audhd-addled peter parker, my darling, my light, my life, my everything.

i think peter parker's such an interesting creature to write, because a lot of people will point to a certain behaviour about him and say "this is an autistic thing, right?" but a lot of those behaviours are actually, in my head, tied to certain traumas in peter's life too.

people say "oh, the food thing, peter's a picky eater because he's autistic" and yes, absolutely. but also it's tied to his trauma with his parents.

peter gets overstimulated, and yes, it's an autism thing, but also he was bitten by a radioactive spider and his senses are dialled to 11.

it's a similar case i've found for myself, too – where a lot of friends i have kind of diagnose me because i have autistic traits, but actually - i'm hesitant to claim the label or pursue diagnosis because, actually, i know where these certain behaviours come from, and they come from certain traumas. there are events i can pinpoint in my life and say "yep. that's where this behaviour comes from."

so - i think there's a lot of overlap between trauma and autistic traits. the brain is very complex! i think the reason for that overlap is maybe as simple as the fact that people with autism and people with trauma are both doing the same thing - developing behaviours to protect themselves or soothe themselves. so - i think it's nice to be able to see a character like peter parker, who may or may not be autistic, but recognise behaviours in him and see yourself in him.

people who go undiagnosed for whatever reason - people who are really good at masking - so good, in fact, that they have no idea they might be on the spectrum - everyone and anyone at all can look at peter parker and recognise themselves. because i think we discredit the thought that every single brain does the same thing! develops certain behaviours in order to survive. every brain has that same software - we've just all been faced with different hardships that we need to overcome, and that's were all the differences come in.

autism is a spectrum, i guess - everyone falls into it to some degree. and i think events in your life probably push you along on it. but i don't know, i didn't study brain science. probably what i'm saying is very stupid and uninformed. of course there's brain chemistry involved. but i know people in my life living with autism and certain events in their life have exacerbated certain behaviours or made coping with it a lot more difficult. so maybe trauma is a catalyst.

#a lot of my traits have been exacerbated lately and i remember it was much easier for me before #and some of my friends have said “oh it's because you've been masking too long and now you're facing autistic burnout.” #and that made sense to me i think. #but then i found out about the stress thing. me overproducing stress hormone. and that's a very physical thing. #and that explains why i've been overstimulated more than usual lately. and why everything feels like too much. #and i wonder how many of these traits of mine are going to subside once i have lamar removed #and it makes me wonder a lot of things. and it's so weird how much your brain is tied to your biology. #i wonder how much i'll change. i wonder how i'll feel. i wonder if i'll still feel like me. i wonder how much me is me right now. #and how much of me is being altered by weird freaky hormones. who am i?? who will i be?? #i'm almost looking at this as like. a superhero origin story of some sort. like this is my spider-bite moment. maybe. #will i be different? will i cope with things differently?? now that my body isn't fighting something anymore?? #maybe i'll be normal. i don't know. i don't know. #i don't know what it'll mean for me. #but all of these things mean i relate to peter parker in a certain kind of way #i don't think you have to be diagnosed with autism to recognise and empathise with those traits i think #i think everyone can see themselves in peter. and i think that's the benefit of having characters that aren't diagnosed. #because there's so much overlap in the human experience. and certain feelings aren't exclusive to just one group of people. #peter has such a rich identity actually. it's an autistic thing. it's a queer thing. it's a jewish thing. it's a trauma thing. #there are so many overlapping parts of peter's identity that inform who he is and how he behaves and it's never just one thing. #it's a product of all of his things. #just like me! just like everyone. #so me? i guess i can be a million things. you can explain what i am in a million different ways. #a hundred different psychologists can all come up with different ways to explain why i be the way i be. #i don't think it's something that can be simplified. #sorry wow. i'm really going off here in the tags. #i hope people don't think i'm stupid. i don't know brain science. i'm just philosophising as usual. #sci speaks

[esleep]

the whole "cats choose their owners" thing is really funny to me because ivy very much did NOT choose me. she was a slightly dim-witted and very rambunctious feral kitten, and that combination led to her getting herself stuck inside an old chipmunk nest halfway down the steep bank of the creek by my parents' house. from there she proceeded to scream her head off until both my mom and i came out to see what on earth was making all that racket, then we excavated her out of that hole like a sad little potato. she was grateful for the rescue, but definitely NOT grateful for the ensuing flea baths and conversion to indoor cat life at my apartment, which she reminds me of regularly. ivy i'm sorry for saving you from an early death due to predation/disease/cars, but can you stop biting me every day of my life please

#even every other day would be an improvement. #i do in fact take her out for leashed walks regularly when the weather is tolerable but it hasn't been possible for months and she's FED UP #however. i say all this but she routinely climbs into my lap for naps & greets me at the door purring & headbutting every time i come home #so clearly she's not that unhappy. her tolerance for regular cat-owner shenanigans however is essentially non-existent. #after 6 years though i can read her like a book. i know exactly how many head smooches i can get in before she gets too annoyed #and exactly how long she wants to be held when i come home before she wants to be put down #and exactly what she means when she 'gently' chews on my ankles ('play with me now or i'll bite harder') #but strangers on the other hand? guests in my home? my beloved human friends? they do not speak her language. #and the margin for error with her is razor thin. if you don't listen immediately when she says 'stop touching me' she will go from lovey #to SCRATCHING YOU BITING YOU HISSING HISSING HISSING almost immediately. #i have tried everything to convince her that's unnecessary but i think she is just SO sensitive she can't handle it #but i still love her so much. i understand her and she understands me. idk WHAT i'm gonna do when she eventually dies i'm gonna be a wreck. #in a lot of ways we are SUPER similar. i also lash out when i'm overstimulated & i also have a much lower threshold for that #than most people. #i get it.

[wereh0gz]

I don't think I've seen anyone go into what physical symptoms Sonic experienced as a werehog. Have I posted abt that before I feel like I might've done that

Anyway here's a list of the symptoms of Sonic's werehog form, since I don't see many hcs abt that

Faster fur, quill, and nail growth

Increased body temperature

Increased appetite and intense cravings (not specifically for meat, but for foods he enjoys)

Sensitivity to light, sounds, and smells (easily overstimulated)

Chronic headaches

Joint and back pain due to changed bone structure

Toothaches, also due to changed bone structure

Muscle tears from transforming

Sore throat from vocal chords changing

Blood turned green (like Dark Gaia's blood)

Most of these don't fully go away when he turns back. During Unleashed, the pains lingered post-transformation and made it hard to get up in the morning a lot

Post-Unleashed, Sonic still deals with his fur, quills, and nails growing much faster than average. His bone structure in normal form is slightly different now too. His joints still hurt a bit because of it, especially his knees. Also his teeth are a lot sharper (not just fangs, all of his teeth)

#ramblings #i'm. not the only one with hcs abt this specific thing right #anyways rejoice werehog hcs be upon ye #these hcs also apply to rue but i'm not tagging them bc the post isn't abt them lol sorry rue ily #i think ppl tend to focus more on how his mind is/could be altered by this form #which is all fine and good but i like to think abt the physical effects it has on him too #in fact i like the idea that any mind/personality changes he displays don't come from dark gaia directly altering his mind #but as a reaction to the physical symptoms #like him being more irritable bc he's stressed from the pain and hunger that comes with the transformation #or he's less focused than usual bc he's overstimulated and has a hard time thinking bc of a headache #that kinda thing #bc ppl aren't usually like themselves when they're sick y'know

[chubbidust]

sonic fusion

#sonic #sonic the hedgehog #sth #silver the hedgehog #silver #shadow the hedgehog #shadow #esper #esper the hedgehog #his name's esper hehe #a very Chaotic being huehue #they hate being fused they can hear each other's Thoughts and have to collaborate to control the body #not to mention they can access each other's memories and they Don't but sometimes they can push them onto each other by accident #and basically all of this privacy breeching makes them want to explode. literally #and they can't sleep good cuz do you know how hard it is to stop thinking?? at the same time??? #it gets easier for them but it takes a hot minute lmao #not to mention all their senses are heightened and they Definitely argue in their mind which overstimulates them constantly #so every other second esper is yelling or punching something or pacing around in circles #they aren't stable they're very upset and want to split up Now #ask me why their name is esper i dare you #my art #fusion #tagging this as fusion too why not

[non-un-topo]

Talking to my sister can be one of the most aggravating experiences

#just allowing myself a few moments of self-pity today #because i'm a little overstimulated/sick of people talking AT me #i have begun to notice that i'm never asked anything... not a single thing. no questions about my life or interests or how school is going #no questions about my partner or our anniversary and no acknowledgement of the big haircut i just got #no questions about my BIL's wedding. none about my health. #every day it's just people talking AT me. kind of tired at the moment... #and this is made worse by my sister's holier-than-thou attitude about literally the smallest and most insignificant things #like washing clothes? and cooking rice?? idk she talks like a housewife now. #and i get to listen to her complain about her 35 year old boyfriend and not say ONE kind thing for 2 hours straight #not a single question for me. not a single nice thing. and i'm talked over constantly #it's not like i don't raise my voice or speak my mind lol #it's just that. between my family and my partner's family. it feels like no one knows just how smart i am and how much fun i can be. #my partner is perfect in so many ways. my best friend and the kindest and most compassionate person i know. #but i really could brag and boast like my sister does over absolutely nothing. because i have actual achievements. but i don't #because who does that lol. fucking annoying and rude people. #maybe my family just thinks i'm okay and so they never ask me anything or call me. ever. #but see.... i don't talk to them because i want advice or help or money. i talk to them because they're my family #and i would very much like to feel cherished and loved by them #/ end angst and self-pity boo hoo

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

so so so so tired and why does my brain tell me things

#listening to the seekers to try and cheer up but shortly ill have to turn it off bc it's getting overstimulating and i can feel my skin #what's the point of even trying. yknow? my doctor told me the other day he's never yet lost a mental health patient but idk i think i might #be the first #nor do i particularly mind at this point #personal #tw suicide #puddleglum hours #obligatory i am safe so don't freak out or anything

[sysig]

Just take things at your own pace, there’s no need to rush (Patreon)

#Doodles #SCII #Helix #ZEX #Dexter Favin #Mostly spacefillers but I like them <3 Continuation! #Following up on the Dex and ZEX kiss and then Dex runs away scenario lol - one of those rare times that Dex hopes he drops it #He's not dropping it! Time to talk about this! Goes about it too excitedly and overstimulates him poor thing <3 #Don't turn his head suddenly! Don't shout! Don't expect him to remember all at once! Goodness me #One step forward two steps back #The middle one lol I was thinking about tools that might help ZEX feel more comfortable engaging with the world around him #I was thinking he'd enjoy an iPad or similar device - though Helix was published before the first iPad came out! :0 Hmm hmm #But anyway - that he'd enjoy a touch screen and getting to use one with his hands :) Either playing tactical games or just looking up facts #Gets one of those 3D solar system model apps and zooms in and out - very distressed when it doesn't go farther than Pluto :( #I've also been thinking about ZEX's ability to read I keep going back and forth on it I can't decide ahhh #He loves humans but would he have studied English specifically?? It's pretty different from VUK ZIX #Does the Captain speak English? Have any of the human languages survived in the same form that we currently speak??? #But he's also incredibly intelligent and interested in humans - weeb equivalence of learning Japanese to read untranslated manga lol #I can't deciiiidee urrggghhh #The rest are age comparisons haha #Dexter was probably at least of legal employment age when he started working for the Vyers when Max was 16 if I remember right? #Unless Dex was one of those family-employment situations of like - when rich people have caretakers that are close to their child's age? #Is that still a thing lol hired playmates #And then ''At least 10 years younger'' might be a slightly high estimate lol but ZEX is definitely older than DAX #Odd to be put in such a young body! Oddly feels more out of shape than his VUX body (lol) #With how much he's gone through even without literally being older he's definitely ages years in such a short time #Especially to be younger than his DAX-equivalent that'd have to feel weird #Has difficulty saying ''me'' when referring to the body he's in :( #Just one more oddity of this human experience

[ante--meridiem]

Extremely confidence boosting to me that every time I've read my poetry out loud in public at least one person has come up to me afterwards to say they like it. More confidence boosting than people telling me I'm good at anything else which usually just feels very awkward because poetry is something I don't feel I can self evaluate at all because I know how easy it is for something to accidentally come out cliched/overwrought.

#personal #this sounds like a brag and I guess I can't say it isn't but it does feel very reassuring #context here is roommate talked me into reading something for a poetry reading thing he organised #which was mostly a bad time because the room was extremely overstimulating & very little of it was in English #(which to be clear: I don't expect everyone to cater to English speakers or anything. it's just that roommate assuring me I'd understand #enough to make it worth it was integral to talking me into this) #(I now think he overestimated how much Swedish I speak) #(not enough to understand an even slightly complex poem that's for sure) #but people did like my poetry & that was a huge ego boost #enough different people have compliment various enough selections of poems I wrote on enougn occasions that I'm starting to think I might #actually be good at this #which is dangerous. stop boosting my ego before I do something dumb like think I might be good enough to try publishing #< only half serious

[theimpossibleness]

I wish I was more than what I am

#I feel like I'm missing parts of myself #like there should be more of me #and if I could just Do Something i'd be able to get more but I'm So Tired #I feel stuck in my tiny house of my consciousness #and I'm so Introverted I get so overstimulated from people and need so much alone time I feel like I'll never have a 'normal' (romantic) #relationship with anyone... #also how do I make time to read the bible I need to do that #I got a little physical book of just the book of Luke the other month and I meant to read it in bed but I forgot about it.. #I could do that tonight #and #put it on my pillow so I don't forget #I think I need to sleep more #and not eat so much sugar #I remembered today that sugar gives me brain fuzz more #...and probably makes me feel like there's less of myself #um anyway if you've read all of this congrats for seeing through a small window into my mind rn #m

[pillowmoment]

i need to hide from you people you guys are scary

#pillow activities #don't ask me “oh pillow is this /j or /gen” i don't know #can we pretend i don't exist for a day like i'm some ancient myth #and i was never real because that would be funny #and also i'd get a break #which i need very very very very very badly i think #like i said um. 100 posts ago probably I'm emotionally exhausted and overstimulated #give me like 100000000 years to recharge my social battery prettyyyy please

[bigeloo]

Drags myself over drops this is this anything

#This is my design for the novel dude btw #mostly because I don't like the design on the cover lol #also really don't like the fact that he basically wears the same outfit there as in p2 #I feel like he should've had some other sort of outfit or at least change up the shirt but it's whatever #also gave him some freckles because he strikes me as a type of ginger who had freckles growing up but they eventually faded #also peep the glasses #personally I think he wore glasses as a kid and teenager but in his adult years his vision got so shit in one of his eyes that he said #''fuck it'' and just wore sunglasses after a certain point foward because he could not afford to have new glasses prescribed to him #and yeah I hc him having astigmatism #totally not projecting no siree #oh yeah and I feel like sunglasses would help with preventing overstimulation from brightness so that's there too #oh yeah and i gave him acne because let's be real. he had acne. #art #digital art #artwork #my art #jūr's scribbles #digital drawing #postal #postal dude #postal special delivery #postal novel #postal special delivery novel

[wereh0gz]

Sonic criticizing werewolf movies bc he is a werewolf (hog)

#ramblings #he sees a movie with a bloodthirsty feral beast controlled by their hunger and is immediately like 'THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS' #'the whole 'werewolves are weak to silver' thing is bullshit i should know i got shot by hunters who thought i was a wild animal once' #'the hunger isn't really the most distressing bit it's the overstimulation actually' #'what did they just like forget about the people they love. you don't just forget that shit why the fuck are they attacking their friends?' #'where's the fear why isn't the werewolf afraid at all' #'man fuck this' #to be fair he is a wereHOG not a wereWOLF so his experiences may be a bit different #but he does it mostly as a joke #i just think it'd be funny if his least favorite genre of media ever is werewolf stories bc of Literally Being One

[spacenintendogs]

near tears i want to go home

#i have an hour left so it'll go by quickly i'm just #nothing BAD has happened but i feel so emotionally unstable rn that like #IDK i keep being pulled every which way #i just wanna focus on redoing these shelves :(( #(i'm on break rn obv i don't go on my phone while working) #rose rants #ig this is that tag lmao #rose rambles #edit: i think i'm overwhelmed (shocker) #idk if i wanna say overstimulated but constantly having to change what i'm doing #and being pulled around #is making me so upset #edit 2: just realized i'm rocking myself i try to mask so bad in public but

[onceuponaweirdo]

I hate this! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it!

#neurodivergent #asd #bpd #head full #many thoughts #i can't stop thinking about it #autism #frustrated #frustation #i'm probably just tired #or hungry #overwhelmed #overstimulated #don't mind me #i'll delete this later

[bumblingbabooshka]

More fics should have Vulcans thinking that human kissing is kind of gross but slowly getting a little into it while still also thinking it’s weird and gross. You get me?

#and whenever I say 'vulcans' in posts like these I'm doing it for you the viewer's sake bc I do mean Tuvok and I think you know that #but just in case this interests anyone else you don't have to try to peel him off every one of my posts bc he's all I think about HEHHEE #Real Post: Chakotay or Neelix kissing Tuvok on the mouth - possibly with tongue - and Tuvok being slightly overstimulated by it #the weird wet texture - the rough or slimy tongue - the heat - and he can feel his partner's arousal though he isn't really experiencing any #of his own (yet) and because they're in so intimate a position he can also hear their thoughts through his telepathy #and it's just a lot and he doesn't know how to feel about it bc he's never kissed anyone like that before outside of pon farr so it feels #inappropriately heated to be doing outside of that context but after awhile.....well. it becomes more enjoyable. let's say that. #I like thinking about Humans As Aliens. To Tuvok this Alien is doing a weird Alien thing that means affection and it's WEIRD................ #..........but also (eyes)