#I love matthias!!! fuckin love him man

[laurent-ofvere]

Maya spill the hot hot tea of what you think of Shadow & Bone series (I’ll say it cz I’m evil, it sucks—-except the cast, the crows in particular really look the part)

I mean listen ive only seen 5 eps of the second season, I haven't read the shadow and bone books to compare and im watching this season with maca who's the worlds biggest hater and we cant get through 2 minutes without her finding things to bitch about and it CLOUDS MY OPINIONS bc I try and think of a scene and all I can hear is her YAPPING

that being said okay mmm I really truly dont give a fuck about the shadow and bone plot, like I just dont care and borderline skim lmao the special effects when she does her light stuff make me violent + does ANYONE like her and mal?? anyone??

I hear nikolai is meant to be hot and charming and all that? physically he bores me lol he's just giving baby face frat boy and im not about it but like, I get it, I guess he does the job (I say as someone who's unfamiliar with his written character and dont know what the job is)

ben barns is hot hes HOT he's so hot and I would rather watch him sit in his dark vibey room and be mute and pissed off for 45 minutes than watch another scene of alina whine about thinks I dont care about and thats really the situation. also, I love genya and david is a punk ass bitch and I wish they went more into her trauma and fucked up past lmao

I so agree on the cast! I really think the crows are FANTASTIC, a way better portrayal than I would have expected. I just, like, we're all on the same page regarding the crows being the more enjoyable part of this show? yes?

im really enjoying how this season seems to be more about their actual book events (unless im remembering wrong? I feel like s1 was mainly made up stuff and backgrounds to tie them into the show and s2 is more book 1 stuff?) and for a story where so much of the oomf is in between the lines and in the "you need to read 600 pages of so many small things that alone mean nothing but together have such an impact" of it, I do think theyre doing a solid enough job. I do think that a lot of it can be quite cringey, but personally I feel like this kinda story and some of these finer dynamics are inherently cringey when on screen and more palatable when its on paper so thats not really a critique on them, more so just is what it is. I also appreciate and am endlessly surprised by how much screen time the crows get given its not technically theyre show. but thats probably bc its just the better story :)

#asks #shadow and bone #quick on the characters bc this post is long and doesnt need to me #kaz is great idc I was the most skeptical of him and yet im the most impressed #hes an awesome kaz maca if youre reading this you can suck my cock #Inej...... why cant I put my finger on you sister #I have nothing negative to say but im just not as !!! by her as in the books #im not by kaz either but idk #I think her kind of character is just the type of impossibly cool that when tried to be portrayed just feels too impossible lol #Jesper isnt as hot to me as in the books but thats on me lmao I cant make up someones looks then kick up a fuss when they dont look like it #characterization wise tho I think he's an excellent Jesper #wylan is adorable and pathetic so thats good news #Nina is WONDERFUL she's a delight #I love matthias!!! fuckin love him man #I wish they showed him/him and Nina/hellgate more #I really do love the relationships in this story #okay I think thats all

[akuma-tenshi]

Long-overdue intro post

No fancy formatting or anything, let's just fuckin' go. I'll update it later.

Hi!! I'm Casey. Or Akuma, either works (though i usually prefer Akuma if we're not close). I use they / them pronouns but am alright with.. pretty much any gendered terms. I'm neurodivergent but not a minor.

Pretty much the only fandom I post about nowadays is Identity V because of the absolute GRIP it's had on me for going on four years now, but End Roll also makes appearances every now and again w/ other fandoms.

DNI's are pretty standards. TERFs, SWERFs, proship, all that. The one hard line I draw with specific ships is Adamil; it's not personal, the ship just makes me viscerally uncomfortable and i don't want it anywhere near me.

As for characters I like: IDV — I have a lot. However, the biggest ones for me are Demi, Emily, Annie, Norton, Luchino, Frederick, Ganji, Emil, Lily, Matthias, Florian, Patricia, Ithaqua, Grace, and Joseph. I'm very fond of most of the cast with few exceptions, but these are just the ones I'm especially ill about. End Roll — Tabasa McNeil save me Tabasa McNeil,, the entire cast is great but Tabasa just Hits Different man Your Turn to Die — Sara, Reko, Kurumada (my friend's fault), Kai, and Anzu are all very special to me Genshin Impact — I've long since left the fandom and the game behind and have no desire to return, but there are a couple characters I hold very dear to my heart. Those ones are Gorou, Cyno, Collei, Freminet, Baizhu, Xinyan, and Bennett. Tighnari too but I'm slightly less insane about him. Bloodborne — Micolash, Maria, Father Gascoigne, and Eileen. I don't have much to say because I don't talk about them much, but rest assured I am incredibly mentally ill over them. Other characters I really love that stand out from their fandoms are Quentin Smith (ANoES 2010 / Dead By Daylight), YOHIOloid & KAITO (Vocaloid), Solaria (SynthV), Jujube & Ama Ryllis (Mandrake Boys), Falken (Dislyte), and Kelthur Marwen & Desira (AFK Arena). These are all characters from fandoms / media I don't interact with much anymore, but they still live rent-free in my head.

Other things I like are cats, thunderstorms, Cake Bake Betty's music, and pastries. I have quite a few characters I headcanon as agender / non-binary and who I will always use they / them pronouns for, but I couldn't care less if you use their canon pronouns around me. I'm an aspiring author with way too many OC's, though I don't really do any OC posting here because my blog is mainly meant to be a fandom-centric space.

Sideblogs: @pmakuma — IDV match clips @true-pr00f — Fanfiction sideblog @sunsetandshadows — Side project I'm working on with @sunset-of-the-void centering around two of our OC's

You can also find me on Twitter at _akumatensh1_ and AO3 at True_Pr00f.

#pinned post #intro post #rambling

[dmclemblems]

like bruh i been compilin’ some stuff for the miklan lore like screenshots and all?

and i just

im so glad i was right and that all my headcanons were true and ended up happening in this game

and it proves to me that miklan was a product of his surroundings and how terrible his family life was

he got disinherited first, and then his dad and step mom fucking sucked and couldn’t get along and according to sylvain weren’t even good parents and sylvain didn’t just say to miklan, he said it in general. nobody was paying attention to either of them and miklan was angry at what happened so he took it out on sylvain BUT MATTHIAS HAD TO GO AND TAKE THE GOLD MEDAL AWARD FOR BEST PARENTING and NOT EVEN DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT

like yeah you heard it here folks

HE DIDN’T EVEN DO ANYTHING

UNTIL IT EVENTUALLY GOT SO BAD THAT HE DISOWNED HIM

LIKE

BRUH U RLY GONNA WAIT UNTIL IT GETS THAT BAD TO DO SOMETHING? YOU COULD’VE EVEN SENT HIM TO LIVE WITH ANOTHER NOBLE TO STRAIGHTEN THE PROBLEM OUT, LIKE, YOU KNOW, THE PROBLEM YOU CAUSED

BUT NOOOO HE’S TOO BUSY FIGHTING WITH HIS WIFE

WHICH MIND YOU LIKE NOT ONLY DID MIKLAN’S BIRTH MOTHER DIE BUT NOW HE’S SEEING HIS DAD MARRY THIS NEW CHICK WHO NOT ONLY ISN’T HIS MOTHER AND IS THE MOTHER OF THE CREST BABY SYLVAIN, BUT THEY JUST FUCKING FIGHT. SO NOW ALL HE SEES IS BAD INFLUENCES IN HIS LIFE THAT SEEM TO CONGRGATE AROUND SYLVAIN’S EXISTENCE

like nah im not saying matthais is the scum of the earth and that he’s the worst man in the whole world bc he’s not and he’s good to his king and his friends and all that

he’s just a horribly pathetic father and should never have been a father no ma’am no sir he cannot parent like this isn’t a gustave situation where he left his family out of guilt but always thought about his family and wrote letters he couldn’t bring himself to send. this isn’t like gustave where he loved his family to pieces but felt like he didn’t deserve them/their love

this is a DUDE WHO JUST AIN’T MEANT TO BE A PARENT

AND MIKLAN NEEDED SOMEONE TO STEER HIM IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION AND DIMITRI FUCKIN’ DID THAT HE FUCKIN’ DID THAT Y’ALL DIMITRI SAVED A MAN FROM CONTINUING TO LIVE THE LIFE HE HAD NO CHOICE BUT TO LIVE

AND HE HAD NO CHOICE BECAUSE HE WAS DISOWNED AND KICKED OUT BECAUSE HE DID BAD THINGS BECAUSE NOBODY TAUGHT HIM ANY BETTER OR PAID ANY ATTENTION TO HIM AND PEOPLE JUST DIDN’T CARE ABOUT HIM

MIKLAN IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU SURROUND SOMEONE IN A TRASH ENVIROMENT AND THEN KICK THEM OUT TO LIVE IN THE TRASH

BUT THEN, HE’S STILL A PERSON, HE’S STILL A HUMAN BEING AND IF YOU INVOLVE ONE WHOLE SINGULAR DIMITRI IT FIXES A WHOLE LOTTA SHIT AND DIMTIRI CAN TURN LIVES AROUND AND MAKE THINGS OKAY FOR PEOPLE WHO OTHERWISE HAD NOTHING

what im saying is miklan is a very good character and not only is he someone who grew up poorly because he was raised poorly (if really even raised at all after his mother died since we don’t know if his mother was good to him or not but either way he lost her so it would still be a huge blow to how he’d turn out, bc either she wasn’t there for him either or she was and he lost the only good thing he ever had), but he’s someone who could be saved and turned to a better path if someone just F U C K I N G C A R E D.

someone who wasn’t sylvain tho bc sylvain’s existence is what caused all his problems and for a kid who wasn’t taught any better i mean obviously he’s gonna look at sylvain and be like it’s his fault all this happened like nah it’s your dad and step mom’s fault this all happened to you and they don’t deserve to be parents and i rly wish you and sylvain had been adopted into another family bc your lives both sucked

but also it’s very good of sylvain to give him another chance and still want to get along with him

psa don’t let me talk abt miklan bc this is what happens and i’ve bottled this up for three years and now bc of three hopes well i may as well just let it go boom

#Three Houses #Three Hopes #Three Hopes Spoilers #Miklan #so yeah this is a thing and this is what happens when i rly wanna talk abt a character but like #ppl legit hated him for a while and i even heard there was this one roleplay group that existed once #that they literally banned him as a character which i mean that's just stupid anyway bc u gotta have chars who #bring some kinda conflict like wtf is point if everything is just peachy in a roleplay group #but for real people legit hated him that it would've been harder to defend him than it has been for gilbert!!!!!!!!!

[janeblr]

some more on my beloved lu:

-has one of those adorable stifled kitten sneezes 🥺🥺 the rest of the nordix mock him relentlessly for it

-except for skiing, a very indoorsy person. would much rather be on his sofa reading his book with a cup of coffee than outside.

-takes his coffee black! he used to put cream in it but one time he forgot to sniff the creamer and it came out in a chunk and traumatized him ;-;

-as I’ve said, killer sweet tooth, but his favorite sweet thing isn’t some traditional dessert or anything it’s just fuckin Oreos. Man can plow through a sleeve of Oreos like nothing

-worlds largest ugly sweater collection. Wears NOTHING but jeans and baggy sweaters, and ofc a suit and tie at meetings. if it’s hot out he just forgoes the sweater and wears an undershirt. favorite sweater is a matching “I’m he’s” one he has with Matthias’ “he’s i’s”

-his hair is naturally wavy/curly! he straightens it but can’t get the short pieces around his neckline so it’s still curly there. is cute.

-always smells kind of like cedar and moss. a very natural, fresh smell, like the forest in winter.

-known for his RBF in public but is VERY expressive at home. very smiley and lovey but still with a very wry sense of humor. Matthias’ favorite thing is this little wiggly thing lu does when he drapes a warm blanket over him uwu.

-I’ve posted about this before but his love language is touch!!!! loves to have just. Full body contact with whoever he’s with. Sleeps directly on top of Matthias, loves to cuddle up with Timo on movie nights(he is comfy after all), bothers the hell out of eirí by just picking him up and holding him at random.

-loves to be picked up himself, very fond of pretending to fall asleep in the living room/kitchen/car so Matt will pick him up and bring him to bed. Was worried when he gained weight that Matt wouldn’t be able to carry him any more but Matt was like “lulu. my love. my sun and stars. i’m the semi-immortal human manifestation of the kingdom of denmark. I can pick you up.”

-can’t sing at all but he can play the violin very well! he has very long, slender fingers so he’s perfect for it.

-the cross hair clip is only one of many little clips to keep his bangs back! a few other favorites include one with a seashell, one with silver leaves, and an absolutely garish bright pink heart hairclip he got from poland during the 2005 secret santa.

-trashy drunk. as soon as he has a few drinks in him, the pants come off and the karaoke machine turns on.

#mypost #japh

[im-constantly-fangirling-backup]

Kaz Brekker x Injured Reader Headcannons

Warnings: Swear words; Spoilers for Six of Crows and Crooked Kingdom

A/N: I’m posting a little bit early today :) I absolutely adored this request!! This trope is one of my favorites so I was hella excited to write this :) Thank you so much for requesting, anon, and thank you for the kind words!! Hope you guys enjoy reading!

[Main Blog] [Masterlist] [Taglist Form] [Requests Open!]

Obviously being in the Crows was risky

It meant that you and the rest of the Crows were constantly doing jobs that could end in one of you not coming back alive

It happened with Matthias

And none of you doubted it would happen again

But the worst injury you ever had didn’t happen on a mission

But rather a night out in a bar

You and the rest of the crows (save for Kaz because he isn’t a party type of guy) went across Ketterdam and decided to have some fun

However, the bar housed a drunk man who had a vendetta to settle with you

He had stumbled up to you with a knife and demanded vengeance

“You killed my family… you took everything from me!” he had screamed at you

You had said nothing, the couple of drinks you had delaying your response

The drunk man slammed you against the wall and wiggled the knife at you threateningly

“I’m going to take everything from you!”

If you hadn’t had as much alcohol as you did, you would have noticed that he was the brother of the head of a human trafficking ring, and you could have reasoned with him

But instead you tried disarming him

And failed because he was much bigger than you

Your escape attempt seemed to fuel his anger even more

And he stabbed you repeatedly in the stomach and your side

You barely registered people in the bar screaming and Wylan (who hadn’t had a drink yet) running towards you to get you back to the Slat

Everything turned black and the noises started to fade

When you woke up, you were laying in a bed

As your vision started to sharpen, you noticed a wooden desk across from the bed and realized that this was Kaz’s bedroom

You snuggled deeper into Kaz’s sheets, smelling the scent of his grey duvet

You heard the door open and looked to see Kaz walking in

He was surprised to see you awake and walked over to sit on the edge of the mattress

“How are you doing?” he asked you

You winced when you tried to move and he put his gloved hand on your shoulder.

“Might not want to move too much yet,” he suggested

You nodded. “I gathered that much, Kaz.”

Kaz smirked and removed his hand from your shoulder

You tilted your head towards him and Kaz gasped lightly

His leather-clad hands hovered over your face and lightly touched the bruises that littered your face and neck

“Who did this to you?” he whispered

You cast your memory back to that night

“I think it was the brother of that guy who ran the human trafficking ring” you answered

Kaz nodded. “I’m going to fuckin’ kill him”

You smiled slightly

Kaz noticed and quirked a brow. “What’s got you so happy,” he teased

You shook your head. “Nothing,” you said wistfully

In your head, all you could think about was that Kaz’s words proved he cared about you

He never told you through words, which sometimes made you feel insecure about if he even wanted to be with you

And he didn’t touch you very often without his gloves (something you don’t mind, but it just adds to the fact that he doesn’t show affection that much)

But this was the way he showed his love

He would make sure you were clothed, fed, warm, and cared for

While he went through hardships to punish the people that made your life hell

Kaz chuckled at your wistful look. “Only you would smile when I mention killing someone,” he jested

You laughed and hooked your pinky with his- which was now resting next to you on the mattress

“You would smile too,” you pointed out

Kaz rolled his eyes but hooked your pinky to his tighter

“I love you,” he said. “I wouldn’t hunt some random idiot for anyone, you know?” He chuckled again. “On that note, please don’t tell Jesper. He’ll never let me live this down.”

You grinned. “I love you too,” you said, basking in the extra affection he was giving you in your condition

“Don’t tell me what?” you both heard Jesper say from behind the door.

“Well fuck,” Kaz grumbled under his breath, letting go of your pinky and grabbing his cane.

“Jesper, I swear to god-” Kaz said threateningly towards the door

You heard the sharpshooter’s footsteps run away from the door

“tHAT’S MY CUE TO LEAVE-”

#backup #backup blog #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker #kaz brekker fluff #six of crows #six of crows imagine #six of crows fluff

[isuckatreadinglol]

Six of Crows Review

Alright, first book review on this blog...here we go: *spoiler warning, duh*

Book: Six of Crows Author: Leigh Bardugo

My Rating: 5/5

First off, this is the first YA fantasy I've ever read so I have no idea what I was expecting...and I fuckin loved it.

Second, I binge read this book in three days and it usually takes me a month to read anything ever so that's definitely saying something. I came for Kaz Brekker after watching Shadow & Bone on Netflix and stayed for the amazing plot, diverse and intricate characters, the incredible action and twists, and of course Kaz Brekker. The one thing that I loved was how fast paced this book went, and I genuinely could not stray far from the book because of how addicting it was. There was something in every chapter and you never got bored. The last part had taken the most time for me to complete because of how much action Leigh crammed in the last 60 pages, which made it a bit hard to follow along but it was still epic.

The Characters:

Kaz, Inej, Jesper, Wylan, Nina, Matthias

"“What’s the easiest way to steal a man’s wallet?” “Knife to the throat?” asked Inej. “Gun to the back?” said Jesper. “Poison in his cup?” suggested Nina. “You’re all horrible,” said Matthias."

The most diverse set of characters I have ever met. There were 6 characters, and the POV's were constantly changing and at some point, while I read someone else's chapter I was worried about the other characters and anticipating the next chapters. This was honestly an amazing decision to tell this story and I never got sick of the characters (except maybe Matthias, sorry).

Not only does Leigh do an excellent job portraying trauma in her characters (especially Kaz), she also keeps the character's as diverse as possible, from Nina being a plus sized character with badass confidence to Wylan overcoming his dyslexia and even Inej being a brown character. Every character had their own stories and the flashbacks/backstories were always a pleasure to read through.

Kaz Brekker is a stone cold, morally grey, manipulative, and terrible criminal which of course...makes him an even better protagonist. He definitely rocks the Hot Boy Who Is Mean To Everyone Except That One Chick Because Of His Tragic Backstory trope.

"There was no part of him that was not broken, that had not healed wrong, and there was no part of him that was not stronger for having been broken."

He is an anti-hero with his own plans and goals, while also caring so much about his crew that he would do anything for them. I'm very excited to see his character develop with Inej in Crooked Kingdom as well as his relationship with her because I am too obsessed with the two of them. I also enjoyed how Leigh allowed Kaz to fuck up and make mistakes, showing that he wasn't just some perfect character that knew everything about everything, and reading his inner dialogue when he realized his fuck-ups felt refreshing. His backstory was very well written and very tragic (we get it he's emo). It felt so personal knowing why he was they way he was when he sealed himself off from the world. He's also drippy as fuck.

Inej Ghafa just radiates bad bitch energy and when Kaz called her "dangerous" I screamed "DAMN RIGHT". Her mental drive was beautifully written during her chapters, especially while she climbed the incinerator.

"The heat of the incinerator wrapped around Inej like a living thing, a desert dragon in his den, hiding from the ice, waiting for her. She knew her body's limits and knew she had no more to give. She'd made a bad wager. It was as simple as that. The autumn leaf might cling to its branch, but it was already dead. The only question was when it would fall...

Should she jump now or simply wait for her body to give?

Inej felt wetness on her cheeks. Was she crying? Now? After everything she'd done and had done to her?"

Most importantly, she was a raw character who pushed herself throughout the book not just for herself but for the rest of the crew. She was selfless but she was also incredibly strong, driven by her future. Inej is the most inspiring character in the book and I have fallen in love with her more times than I could count. (lowkey carried the team imma be honest)

JESPER FAHEY Y'ALL. My queer sharpshooter king. I think I related to him the most and I loved every chapter with him. Though, I felt like Jesper was treated more as a side character than a main one, especially since he was stuck with Wylan for the entirety of the heist but BOY WHEN I FOUND OUT HE WAS A FABRIKATOR...I might have also screamed. He was definitely the comedic relief and he always kept me laughing at his little comments. Excited to see him and Wylan get together and also hoping for more of Jesper's character.

"Well, we’ve managed to get ourselves locked into the most secure prison in the world. We’re either geniuses or the dumbest sons of bitches to ever breathe air."

“If any of you survive, make sure I have an open casket. The world deserves a few more moments with this face.”

Nina Zenik...bro. She is so powerful. The moment she took parem was *chefs kiss* and it was the most badass scene I had ever experienced. When I began reading her chapters I didn't really enjoy them but when the heist actually began her inner dialogue won me over completely. When she was with Jarl Brum I could not stop laughing at the things she was saying in her head, and even when things were intense she always had something to say which made her character come to life. Her personality is hilarious, and sarcastic and she's also so HOT like my gay ass was swooning. She is who I aspire to be, that is all.

Matthias Helvar. Personally, I didn't really like his character so much because of how stubborn and he was (and how many times I wanted to punch his stupid ass), however he was still a pretty cool character with some good moments in there. He demonstrated religious corruption well, and he definitely faced a lot of inner conflict due to the pressure of what he was taught when he was younger. His POVs were a little boring but I loved it when he called Kaz a demjin.

Wylan Van Eck was a super fun character to have around. I definitely enjoyed watching his character grow as he spent more time with the Dregs. I didn't love him as much as the big three (Kaz, Jesper, Inej) and don't have much to say on him except that I admired his strength throughout the last part, especially when confronting his father after hearing all the horrible things he said about his own son. Jesper defending him made me melt big time.

"He's smarter than most of us put together, and he deserves a better father than you."

I literally could not have asked for such a creative group of characters and to see them work together makes me feel like I'm part of a big, criminal family.

The Ships

The ships were a fun addition to the story and the best part was that they never overstepped the actual objective of the plot but rather worked with it to enhance the connections between each character.

Kaz and Inej: Let me just cry for a second.

"She'd laughed, and if he could have bottled the sound and gotten drunk on it every night, he would have. It terrified him."

"I will have you without armor, Kaz Brekker. Or I will not have you at all."

"I'm going to get my money, Kaz vowed. And I'm going to get my girl."

This one hurt me. I am in love with these two and their relationship with each other makes it so much better. They are not meant to be together yet they are connected in so many ways. I did not think I would fall in love so easy, but here I am.

Matthias and Nina: I was not convinced by these two, especially with how weird their relationship was. They constantly seemed like they hated each other (valid) and some of their romantic scenes felt forced. In the end, I enjoyed seeing Nina grow on Matthias to wake his stubborn ass up. I swear that man refused to have feelings. Anyway, I still have mixed feelings on these two.

Wylan and Jesper: They are so cute. Like insanely cute. Like even I was blushing during their cute scenes. Their relationship isn't as developed yet so I am excited to see them in Crooked Kingdom.

Final Thoughts:

Representation? Check

Map? Check

Two maps?!? Fuck yeah

Amazing plot and worldbuilding? Check

Hilarious banter? Mhm

Great writing? Check

Well- written characters? 100%

Overall, this story will forever be my comfort book and I was impressed by the YA fantasy side of literature. It's hard to believe yet comforting that these characters are my age, makes me feel powerful. I loved every bit of this book and now I kinda wanna grab some friends and pull a heist.

#six of crows #grishaverse #the grisha series #crow club #shadow and bone #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #nina zenik #jesper fahey #wylan van eck #no mourners no funerals #the dregs #soc #sabspoilers #the crows #book review #booklr #ya fantasy #kanej

[fortunatelyhauntedblackcherry]

Moonshine - A Beetlejuice Fanfiction 11

Warning: swearing, breaking in, panic attack, abusive ex, mention of killing.

Beetlejuice was sitting on the edge of the roof, legs dangling in the air. Only a couple of hours passed by since the boarding-session, but the demon sank back into deep depression already. He pushed his dark purple hair back and sighed. Why does everyone keep leaving me? We could've been such a great team. That little minx and me, wrecking havoc together. He sniffled, wiped his nose into the sleeve of his greyish-blueish coat patterned with pieces of moss, and hummed a song he first used when he lost all hope because of a ghostcouple, right before he tried to talk an edgy teen into summoning him.

- 🎶You're invisible when you’re me, there's no one to see my truth... If they could look up they’d see: "Hey, somebody's on the...🎶 ...pavement? - he stopped as he spotted a man on the sidewalk, drunkenly lurching towards the house. In his left hand there was a bottle of booze, half empty, the stench nettling Beetlejuice's acute demon nose. Cheap whiskey. His mother drank this when he was a child.

He stood up and watched the man for a minute. Yepp, he was definitely heading towards the house, it wasn't just a coincidence that a drunk person somehow winded up on the farthest outskirt of the Connecticut town. Even though he was still very angry at Ari and her party pooper sisters, he floated through his favorite breather's bedroom window, and headed straight to the sleeping girl. Ari's laptop was down on the floor, the fourth Nightmare on Elm Street movie was playing. Beetlejuice smiled lightly at the sweet gesture. Ari was laying on her belly in her bed, quietly breathing with a bit of saliva dripping from her lower lip, snuggling up to Sirius.

- Ari... - BJ called softly but no answer came. So he tried one more time, now a bit louder. - Ari... - he sighed as Sirius opened up his eyes and blinked sleepily at the demon. - I can't believe that you're in such a deep sleep, babes. - Sirius turned his scruffy head sideways. - ARIADNÉ! - the girl suddenly lifted her head up, startled because of the abrupt noise.

- YES WHAT I'M AWAKE. - she stated in a sleepy voice, hastily opening her gummed eyes. She wiped her peepers, yawned and reached for her phone. - Shit, Beetlejuice, it's 2 in the morning, do you really wanna talk about tonight AT THIS UNGODLY HOUR? I told you, I'll talk to my sisters about...

- There's someone in the garden. - he caught Ari up in her speech. The girl's eyes widened.

- What? - she said in a sleepy tone as she sat up in bed.

- I don't know why I'm warning you, every single one of you would deserve to die since you've been so mean to me, but babes I think somebody wants to break into the house. Demon sixth sense. - Ari hurled the covers away from herself, blinking away every last drop of sleepiness, got off the bed and reached under it. She came back with a baseball bat, embedded with nails. Sirius jumped off the bed too and ran to Rei's room.

- Good boy, he knows what to do. - stated Ari as she got out into the hallway. - Thanks for telling me we're in danger. - she said quietly to Beetlejuice as she headed down the stairs. - I thought you're still mad at me, it's good to know that you're not furious anymore. - she got into the downstairs hallway, and made double sure that she locked the door of the winter garden. - Back in Europe there were a lot of times that someone wanted to break into our house, you know, we lived in a kinda messy neighborhood, so we know how to deal with these situations. - while she talked, she checked every door and window if they were closed properly. - I check shit and get ready to beat the living shit out of someone and thus getting freed from my built up anger, Sirius wakes up Rei, Rei calls the police, Sof sleeps through the whole thing. She's like a dormouse. - she explained. Beetlejuice floated next to her, examining her plaything and her buttocks which were only covered by an oversized ACDC t-shirt and a pair of boxers.

- Well I couldn't be angry at someone who has such a nice ass for a long time... - he said but was interrupted by a couple of uncoordinated knocks. They came from the front door. Ari ran over, holding her baseball bat tightly. As soon as she got to the door, she swang it above her head.

- Be warned, I am armed and we already called the police. - she stated in a serious matter which legitimately surprised Beetlejuice. She looked mean. - Go away buddy and let's continue our night peacefully.

- Honey it's me, let me in and let's talk! - stuttered a drunken male voice from the other side of the door. Ari's eyes widened and her lips opened in surprise. The mean look she had just a moment ago, disappeared.

- No way... - she whispered to herself. She suddenly shook her head, closed her eyes for a moment and clutched the bat even harder. Her fingers turned white. Something's wrong, realized BJ. He never saw that look, that frightened, anxious look before. Something's fucky.

- I don't know how can you be here and not in jail, but go away! - she almost screamed the last words. She tried to put back her mean face but her eyes and her lips hardly pressed together reflected fear. Legitimate, pure fear.

- Please don't tell me that it's... - asked Beetlejuice but Ari cut in with nodding. Matthias. Evil ex. Gotta kill.

- Good behavior, baby. - the man on the other side of the door said with a small laugh. - Please Ari let's just talk...

- NO! - the girl screamed. Beetlejuice noticed that her breathing got shaky and heavy. - LEAVE ME ALONE!!! - the man pounded his fist on the door.

- YOU OPEN THIS DOOR NOW ARIADNÉ! - he shouted. Ari flinched and lowered her arms abruptly. She breathed even shakier now. The man on the other side of the door cleared his throat. - Please sweetcheeks, I changed!

- You will never change! You're always going to be a mentally abusive pinche puto! - said Ari, whose eyes started to get teary. - Go hug a landmine!

Beetlejuice couldn't handle himself for any longer. His dark purple hair was already in a kind of red shade, and his eyes glitched with anger.

- If you keep your promise, I'll keep mine. Summon me and I'll rip him into pieces. - his disembodied voice sounded even more croaky then before. It sounded like it came from every direction possible. It made Ari's hair stand on end. She gulped and answered in an undertone.

- Murder is never the answer... I'm sure the police will do their job... - Beetlejuice rolled his eyes, and let out a guttural, gravelly annoyed sigh.

- No, you're right, murder is a question. - he stopped for a moment, stepped closer to the shaking girl whose eyes were fixated on the door. - And the answer is yes. You know he deserves it. Some people can't be stopped any other way. And I feel this jerk is one of them. Demon sixth sense.

As he said the last sentence, the banging on the door and that drunk idiot screaming the girl's name constantly started again. Ari jumped and dropped her baseball bat. She pushed her back against the wall. With a shaky hand, she grabbed her chest while breathing heavily. She closed her eyes, breathed in deeply a couple of times then couldn't take it anymore.

- VETE A LA MIERDA!!! - she screamed just before Rei ran into the hall, phone pressed to her ear.

- Yes, he's still here, right before the door. - she quicky looked at Ari and as soon as she realized how she trembled, she launched herself at her sister, lowering her phone. - Holy shit, Ari, what happened? You're shaking, baby...

- Rei?! - asked the voice from the other side of the door. His voice got honeyed in a second. - Dear Rei, please, sweetheart, let me in, let me talk to your lovely sister about coming back to me! - Rei's jaw dropped.

- What the everliving fuck. - she said. She hugged Ari tightly and put on a mean face. - Go home Matt, leave us alone! Ari doesn't want to see you ever again! I already called the police! - the man growled and pounded his fist on the door.

- Hit that fuckin door one more time... - grumbled Beetlejuice while staying close to his breather friendo. They got so close so quickly, and to be perfectly honest he really wanted to end this guy to keep her safe.

- See, Ari, she's talking against me! - his voice was so honeyed it made Ari nauseous. - These assholes, your sisters, are keeping you away from me! I know you love, you've always been a good girl, if they wouldn't have messed up your mind with their stupid nonsenses, you'd have never left me! They made you blind, you know that I truly love you and that we belong together!

- I feel like I can't breathe... - said the trembling girl with bated breath, clutching her chest while holding Rei's hand close. - My heart hurts so much...

- Ari, baby, we were meant to be one! - no answer came so he lowered his voice a bit and stuttered. - You know, am I right?! - again, no answer, so the man slapped the door with his palm. - ARIADNÉ ANSWER ME! YOU KNOW THAT YOU WERE MEANT TO BE MINE! - Ari lifted her head up. Her eyes were full of tears and she spoke in a very low voice.

- Please Matthias... Leave me alone... We were kids, it's been a long time ago... I don't love you anymore, please understand... Just leave me be...

- Yes we were, but see?! You talk so nicely! I made you kind! You are the way you are because of me!

- Entitled shithead... - commented Beetlejuice. Ari smirked and got herself together for a moment. Anger found its way into her eyes.

-...no. I am kind because I choose to be, because I cannot allow anyone to see what I've been through. You made me scared, angry, and vulnerable. I made myself like this. Now go... AWAY!!!

Ari was shaking, both from the panic attack and the anger. The guy lowered his voice and BJ definitely heard a familiar tone in his speech. An evil tone.

- You know what? I wanted to talk through this but okay. Fine. Have it your way. - he pounded his fist on the door one last time and then lurched away, as they heard.

It took Ari at least half an hour to get through the panic attack. She was sitting on the living room floor now, staring before herself, sipping water with a straw from her favorite glass with Minerva snuggling in her lap. When the man left, Ari told Rei to keep talking with the police, she'll be alright. She took deep breaths like her middle sister taught her, but what mostly helped was that Beetlejuice just talked to her. He was trying, very awkwardly, but was trying to talk to his friend about calming down and everything being okay. He heard how to do it a week ago. A couple of minutes after Ari finally got kind of better, a very grumpy and sleepy Sof joined them, who got woken up since "Sirius jumped on me several times and now I think I'm bleeding internally." Ari told her what happened and just finished the story when Rei showed up.

- Well the police is not sending any help.

- WHAT?! - asked both Ari and Sofía.

- The dispatcher said that they sent out a car, they looked around the area, but didn't see anything suspicious so they left... - she took her glasses off and rubbed the bridge of her nose. - He told me that if the intruder comes back, and breaks in, then they can intervene in the situation. - she collapsed onto the ground, next to her sisters. - I'm still saying that drug lords are better at keeping people safe than the police, guys...

Since none of them was talking, Beetlejuice floated above Ari and left a sly remark, his croaky voice echoing in the girl's ear.

- You know he's gonna come back, don't you?

- Oh he surely will. - answered Ari right before she let out an annoyed chuckle. - He's a persistent motherfucker... - she looked at her sisters who were waiting for her to explain. - Our houseguest just remarked that in his opinion Matthias is gonna come back. And to be honest, same.

All of a sudden, Beetlejuice started to perk his ears up like a watchdog. He sniffed around, angry red locks lighting up as he identified the familiar stench.

- And speaking of the devil... - he spit the words out between his teeth right before the sound of glass breaking came from the winter garden. All three of the sisters stared at the winter garden's door, frozen in fear. A couple of seconds later the familiar banging started on the back door, with Matthias talking in a honeyed voice and drunken giggling from another men from the back. Sirius showed his teeth, growled and barked at the door. Sofía was the first to act, she grabbed Ari's hand and pulled her to the front door. She grabbed her keys from the hallway table.

- We're getting out of here, we get into the car and onto the police station. - she stated and put her keys in the lock. Out of curiosity, she looked out the peeping hole. She jumped back and removed her keys. - Someone's out there. A man with a gun is standing before the door. - she started to breath heavily. - We're trapped.

Ari started to went astern as she grabbed Rei's hand.

- ARIADNÉ! - the girls all looked the door and gulped. So this is why people just stand around in horror movies. Fear. - Open the...open the door, please... Ari, just open the door... We don't need to fight anymore! Just... Open up... - Matthias slapped the backdoor again. - I SAID OPEN UP!

- Okay I'll call the police again. He's practically in the house. - said Rei and she grabbed her phone.

Ariadné collapsed on the living room floor and pushed her back to the back of the sofa, eyes wide with fear and anger, thoughts running around in her head. She had to act quick. She realized it was a fight or die situation.

- And what will they do, ha? - she said in a brittle voice. - Put him in jail for another 3 years because he's on "good behavior"? It would all start again guys, he'd find me again... - she looked deep into Rei's eyes who lowered her phone. - I want to live freely! And deep down both of you know that there's only one who can stop him...

- ARI, NO! - screamed Sofía.

- ARI, YES! - shouted Beetlejuice as he stood next to Ari. A toothy grin appeared on his face, his eyes glowing. His hair was a weird mixture of yellow, green and burgundy. - You scratch my back, I scratch yours! You remember, three times in a row it must be spoken, unbroken! - the husky voice filled Ari's ears. She made a decision.

- You don't know what will happen! - said Sofía, intermittently looking at the door, which was now hammered by at least 3 man who tried to break the hinges. - You can't do this! We'll find another way out, just...

- I CAN'T KEEP LIVING LIKE THIS! - chimed in Ari with a raucous tone. - IN CONSTANT FEAR, FRIGHTENED FOR MY FAMILY, MY FRIENDS, MY LIFE! I wanna be free! I'm so sorry guys but I have to do this... for myself... - she closed her eyes for a moment. When she opened them up, they were sparkling with dedication. - Beetlejuice!

Green smoke started to fill the air, seeping from the ground next to Ari. Beetlejuice felt his body filling up with power. Sofía and Rei stepped back.

- Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! I'm so glad you realized you have a solid plan B option! You are never going to regret this! - Ari looked around in surprise, a shy smile found its way to her face

- Beetlejuice! - she said confidentially, and the ground moved. They heard that all of a sudden it started to rain, the sky rumbled and lightnings appeared. The flashing lights filled the living room.

- This is gonna be so good! - his voice was almost horny. He felt his powers returning, and his smile got wider and wider. Not humanly wide. - Give me just... one... more...

- YOU DON'T KNOW HOW HE'LL REACT! - screamed Sofi who tried to launch herself at Ari but Rei pulled her back. Rei nodded at Ari who took a deep breath.

- BEETLEJUICE! - she shouted and the world rumbled. Beetlejuice crouched next to Ari, leaned close to her and whispered into her ear. The girls' hair stood on end as the gravely voice filled her head.

- It's showtime!

#alex brightman #beetlegeuse #beetlejuice #beetlejuice fanfiction #beetlejuice oc #beetlejuice the musical #fanfic #fanfiction #lawrence beetlejuice shoggoth #musical!beetlejuice #beetlejuice broadway

[iamvegorott]

Farm Life Ch. 7

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Talk To Me

“Hey.” Edgar greeted and cleared his throat. “Shocked you’re up.”

“I was going to say that to you.” Bim weakly chuckled, sitting down on the porch next to Edgar, seeing that there were two empty bottles on the ground. “I heard you moving around and I was curious to know what you were up to.”

“Couldn’t sleep.” Edgar shrugged, taking another swig from the bottle of beer in his hand. “Want one?” He asked when he saw Bim eyeing the bottle.

“I shouldn’t.”

“Why not?”

“I’m pretty stupid sober, I don’t think anyone could handle me drunk.” Bim rubbed his neck.

“You ain’t gonna get drunk from one beer. You’ve bulked up a little since coming here, you’ve earned it.” Edgar grabbed one of the bottles from the sixpack and handed it to Bim.

“I haven’t really bulked up.” Bim softly protested and took the bottle, yelping in pain when he tried to twist the top off and it scratched his palm.

“Your legs ain’t twigs, ya got some meat on your thighs.” Edgar took the bottle back and used the step they were sitting on to pop off the cap.

“Really?” Bim looked down at his legs, it might have only been a month of riding, but his thighs did feel a little thicker. He thought he was just imagining it.

“Can I ask you somethin’?” Edgar asked as Bim took the bottle once more.

“Yeah.” Bim nodded and took a drink from the bottle, face scrunching from the taste.

“What did that Matthias guy do?” Bim thickly swallowed at the question.

“He didn’t really do anything bad.” Bim chewed on his lip. “He was nice about it.”

“Nice about what?”

“He caught on.” Bim could feel his face flushing in embarrassment as Edgar just looked at him, waiting for clarification. “That I had a crush on him.”

“Oh.” Edgar helped himself to a mouthful of beer.

“It was a stupid crush that just happened. I’m over it.” Bim forced himself to take another swig. “I’ve been over it but Matthias didn’t catch that part and tried talking to me, doing the whole ‘I see you as a friend’ and ‘you’re a great guy and you’ll find someone’ bullshit that doesn’t mean shit!” Bim realized he had started to yell and he sniffed. “Sorry, it was just so...annoying.”

“I know that feeling.” Edgar put down his now empty bottle and got a new one.

“How?”

“I had a wife.” The air went silent and Bim could only look down and after taking another drink, he was shocked to find he already finished it.

“I didn’t know.” Bim blurted out.

“Most of y’all don’t.” Edgar shrugged. “It didn’t end well.”

“What do you mean?”

“She got pissed, took Suzy and left.” Edgar downed his beer in one go. Bim wasn’t sure what to say and he just placed down his empty bottle. “It’s a little more complicated than that,” Edgar said after taking a breath, grabbing the last two beers and giving one to Bim. “We met when we were young, would have been high school sweethearts if I went to high school.” Edgar helped Bim open his bottle again. “It started as a fairy tale, heads over heels in love and all that. We got married and it wasn’t long till Mary had a baby bump on her. I thought we were fine and then money trouble started happenin’. It was before I agreed to work with Dark and the others when I thought I could handle myself, my wife and my soon to be child on my own. I thought to myself that since I was the man of the house, I had to take care of it and if that wasn’t the dumbest mistake I had ever made.” Edgar looked out, seeing that Shelia was still playing around in the field.

“What did you do?” Bim asked.

“I started sellin’ kids,” Edgar answered honestly. “I was young, dumb, naive and I let these fuckin’ dirtbags convince me that it was the best thing to do. Sell these kids so I don’t have to sell my own.”

“Sell them?”

“I never asked what happened to them. I couldn’t know, I refused to know.” Edgar’s voice cracked a little. “I thought that if I was only the frontman, the one that smiled and walked them in, I wasn’t one of the bad ones. I just wanted what was best for my family. They needed food and I believed that it was just a weird way of adoptin’ out kids. Isn’t that adoptin’ is? When you adopt you have to pay, we were just cuttin’ out a lot of the trouble. We were getting rid of all of those middlemen.”

“So, she found out?” Bim could feel his heart hurting for Edgar.

“Yeah, she went through my emails. I can’t even get mad at her for doin’ that because I was the monster between us. She was just gettin’ worried about my late nights. She just wanted to know what I was up to and...well, she found out.”

“I’m...sorry.” Bim gently patted at Edgar’s back.

“Suzy was only one, I barely even knew her. The last time she saw her daddy was him gettin’ screamed at by her mama and then gettin’ hit. I deserved it but...it still stings every time I think of it.”

“Did you try talking to her? Explain what was happening?”

“What was there to explain, Bim? I sold babies, I literally sold babies to strangers to do whatever they wanted to them. Do you know how many nights I can’t sleep because that thought runs through my mind? I’m a grown-ass man and I find myself crying for them. I don’t cry and yet here I am.” Edgar scrubbed at his eyes with a closed hand. “I should have been smarter. I have a farm, I could have found a way to take care of us...but...I just…I couldn’t.”

“How did you end up with Dark and us?” Bim asked.

“He found me. It was only a week after Mary left and I was at a motel, drunk and screaming at the ice machine for cheatin’ me. I didn’t know what the hell he was. I thought he was the devil comin’ to make me pay for my sins but who would have known I would be workin’ for him and committing more sins by gettin’ rid of the men I used to sell to. What a way the world turns.” Edgar started to gather up the empty bottles, standing up. “And what about you, Bim? What got you in this mess of a business we’re in?”

“It’s not that fun of a story.”

“And mine is?” Edgar poked at Bim’s shoulder with the bottles. “I think there’s some ice cream hiding in the freezer. I can scoop us up some and you can tell me the Trimmer tale.”

“The Trimmer tale?” Bim chuckled and got up as well.

“Mine’s the Ed Fable if that makes you feel better.” Edgar laughed. “Shelia!” He called out and the dog came running. “You might wanna take a step to the side.” Bim didn’t question it and moved, almost getting hit by the speeding bullet that was Sheila.

“Does she get ice cream?” Bim asked in a teasing tone as the two went back into the house.

“Only if you wanna clean her shit.”

“Gross.”

“You asked.”

--------------------

Requests are CLOSED Commissions are OPEN

Tag List: @darkwarf @readeatfightlove13 @sketchy-scribs-n-doods@blueyeswhitedragon16 @estraevelyn @virge-of-death@superdltpurplerage @xhuxk37 @i-am-not-anon @wolfbear135 @always-in-a-fandom@lavenderamy @derpytoez @pixelenchanter @sirkawaiipotato@bosmeri-alyd@demons-jim @pastel-anonymous @alliegameing @allidrawss @coogwoog

#bimgar #bimedgar #edgarbim #da farm gays

[ibuproffie]

things my brother has said while reading crooked kingdom by leigh bardugo

the book “white hot anger shot thru kaz” or sum ~ my brother “hERP DERP WHiTE ANGER for an ANGRY WHITE BOI”

when jesper tells wylan “but it’s not all that i want” and gets interrupted by kaz before he can finish the steamy moment ~ “kaz brekker, master cockblock”

while kaz works thru his inej feels: “look, he’s even cockblocking himself here!”

every kaz @ jesper shithead moment: “stop! in the name of love!” or “get over it you emo fuck”

when jesper comforts wylan after he’s freaking out about his mom: [slowly and with a lot of deliberation] i…like jesper. is that so wrong? me: no?? him: i feel gross just saying that

“good god nina, keep it in your pants!”

[in reedy dwarf voice] “it’s my aesTHETic to watch ppl get bREKKed.”

[about inej] “who has two thumbs and was sold into sex slavery?? THIS GUY!!”

[about soc matthias] “nina WHO? ain’t no time for tolerance when you’re on that GRIND! we STAY grisha hunting-DJEL first, team second”

pekka rollins @ kaz: you’re like me but with less style; my brother: you’re literally wearing green pants shut the fuck up

my brother: you know who pekka rollins reminds me of? me: who? my brother: that one song from leprechaun in the hood (if you’ve never heard of this, this is the sole reason i am afraid of white people) 

we have a running joke about that one time that kaz and wylan quite literally crashed jan van eck’s dinner party (i.e. falling through the ceiling and landing on the dinner table) and kaz got gravy on his coat. every subsequent chapter he’s like “bUT DID HE CHANGE HIS GRAVY COAT THO?” and it turns out kaz never did change his coat until he returned to the slat to fight per haskell, so yeah those really emotionally charged chapters w jesper and inej he was wandering around like a fuckin dumbass w gravy on his coat (and that’s how ck was ruined for me a smol bit) 

the book: “inej was wrong. he knew exactly what he intended to leave behind.” my gremlin lookin brother: CUM.

 “just imagine…you’re drunk and playing the same three-note song on a tin whistle, out w the Lads and you see this scary ass boi hacking away at ppl w a cane-by what logic do you decide to ENGAGE HIM IN SINGLE COMBAT?! someone needs to come get their mans” [he has a point] 

after the disastrous kuwei x jesper kiss: “alright, so apparently we’re getting kuwei yul-bo is a loser, coming 2019. [shakes his head in grudging admiration for kuwei’s shenanigans] greasy catfish looking ass.”

[jn the tone of maddie from f the prom]: “kaz, you riled?”

[jesper fakes food poisoning to avoid the cops] “poop jokes?! when will your fave ever? also sten’s stockpot sounds like the place you would listen to the sex offender shuffle on your ipod nano correct me if i’m wrong”

[wylan scams the merchant council into making them think he’s literate] “oh, it’s about to get ALL cam jansen in this bitch!!”

[describing kaz] “he’s a lot like panic at the disco, but more panic and less disco.”

read my six of crows post here:

https://ariistides.tumblr.com/post/180925066709/things-my-brother-has-said-while-reading-six-of

#ari.txt #soc #six of crows duology #six of crows #crooked kingdom #i know about 3/4 of this is kaz but he’s a pretty memeable character can you blame him #i think this vers is funnier than the previous but watch it not get the notes #i think i'm funny #this is just for fun guys #pls don’t take any of this seriously #b/c some ppl did last time #everyone has dif favorite characters

[rosey-writes]

Eliot- Violin, Marimba, Fiyero- Bagpipes, Jason- Harp, Jonathan- Oud, Sparks- Recorder, Matthias- Organ, Axel- Harpsichord, to the mod- Marimba, Hai Lin- Trumpet, sorry for such a long one, you don’t have to do them all!

mSorry I took for literal ever, I wanted to make sure they were all good, hopefully I succeeded! I’ll try to be faster next time Eliot

Bravon’s going to call me an ‘emo bitch’ for this, but- I don’t get sad all too often. Never have. Usually it comes out as me being pissed, which I personally find much more useful. Even at things that do make me sad instead of the much more useful anger, I do everything in my power to turn it into anger- to find a problem and solution and do it. I don’t believe in lying down and accepting whatever happened. You move on and you break whatever did it to you, or you die trying.

As for my ‘defining trait’? I have no fucking clue- let me go ask Bravon and Axel.

(Ten. Minutes Later)

Well Bravon said it was that I’m bottom, and Axel said it’s that I can make great hot chocolate so they’re useless. 

I guess if not those, I don’t fucking know- I guess I’m resilient? If that’s the word? I don’t like inaction, not doing anything to me is worse than self destruction. Humans weren’t meant to take being pushed down, you keep going even if it hurts you more. 

Fiyero:

How sweet of you for asking ❤️

My heritage is my lifeblood. Why wouldn’t it be? Not everyone is lucky enough o be a Deamorte, why wouldn’t I show it as much as I could~ We’ve been celebrities since Venice, what’s there not to be proud of! ❤️ 💖

As for country wise, while I admit I’m not the largest fan of my hair, I love my Irish background from my father’s side, they’re such a fiery people, how could I not? And my mother’s Roman ancestry is the reason I have the gifts I do- the bedrock of civilization and all that. And nothing in this world could compre with the marble streets of Italy.

Of course, I would love to add some more Irish to the family line, right, @liliesinwrittendreams ?

Jason:

Bagpipes? Really? You pick the most lame-ass instrument there is? Whatever- least I got a better ask than Johnny. Good luck to that creep explaining his shitty parents. 

Anyway- pride? In my heritage? I mean, gotta say, I’m white as fuck. We’re Mayflower bitches. Some of the first police officers in the state, went back since for literal ever. Pretty proud I guess, police, generals, pretty badass. But I don’t really like relating to my old man unless I have to.

Fuckin’ dick.

I drink a lot of beer? That count as ‘showing my heritage’? Fuck it, sure, love German beer. We’ll call it that.

Jonathan:

I don’t know why Jason would think I wouldn’t want to answer this, I love my family, all of them, even the...problem child, Jason grew up to be.

Well, not ‘grew up’. He was always like this. Throwing my dolls in the river and all that.

It’s a hard call, honestly, between Jason and my ma, but, I’m sure you’ve all heard enough about Jason to last a lifetime.

[”Jonathan you creepy fuck stop trying to write me ou-]

Ignore him. He got his attention seeking from father.

Besides that, I’d say my ma’s the one who taught me. She fell sick when I was younger, so I was the one who took over the farm work, especially when Jason left to move to the city with father. Seeing her so weak, helpless, the woman who gave life, who held me when I was crying as a child, protected me from my father’s rampages, would jump in front of his fist in the name of protecting her child, I learned just how important it was to protect the weak.

That’s why I know it’s my callin’ in life, protecting what can’t protect themselves. Animals, children, weaker adults. Even if my mother is no longer in this world-bless her heart- I’m still around to keep her legacy around. 

And, if I can say anything about it, I’m goin’ to make a world safe for people like her.

Sparks:

Oh, gosh, I-I, I don’t remember much of when I was a kid. I spent a lot of time inside, we were traveling all the time, s-so I didn’t get much of a chance to make friends. I had a lot of siblings, though, who were always with me, I loved a lot! I don’t keep in much contact with them anymore, my older sister, Mai, tries to call me sometimes but, u-usually it’s to try and get me to join It Works...

Oh! I remember it. It’s like a really really specific thing but...

When I was a kid, really young, I got picked on a lot. I was kinda weird, had- have- a gaptooth, didn’t really get other kids. A couple kids started messing with me, pushing me to the ground and I hurt my arm really bad on the school steps.

I guess...I just remember really clearly how I felt in that moment. Well, that, that I didn’t feel. I’d seen in every movie, seen other kids in that moment, they’d cry, they’d feel bad and...

I didn’t.

I wanted to. I tried to talk mean to myself while they did it. I repeated the names they called me, I called myself ugly and stupid and a freak, but, I couldn’t make myself sad. It was weird. I wanted to know what sad felt like, if nothing else than curiosity. 

That was when I realized why I was different, I think. I didn’t know why mom was taking me to doctors before that, I didn’t understand. I do now though. It’s been hard but, I’ve worked through it. I just needed an ù̶̟͋p̶͇͈̑d̷̦͊a̴̠̳͗̔̇t̶͇̬͆́e̷͇̜̋͑̿.

Matthias: 

LOL, thought you said Organ. Like, ya know. A dick. Is a dick an organ? BRB, gotta google that.

Well I’ll be danged.

Anywhoswhatevers. Blowy thing. Duuude, we watched the Ring, it was sick. Dad and I have horror movie Mondays, which, yeah, tehcnically god doesn’t like or whatever, but, dad says as long as we get permission from the pastor ahead of time, we’re good. 

And, when ya’ got the pastor’s nudes, anything is good by him.

It’s so funny, that movie scares the poop out of anyone, so watchin’ dad watch it was so freaking funny. Wish I had a vid. He started crying once, unplugged the phone, it was great. 10/10, would recommend. V good.

Axel: 

I got one! ;LDKFDSAKJ That is so cool!!!!

This whole thing is cool, I haven’t heard a harpsichord, what’s that? It’s like a super big piano right, with ploppy keys? I should learn to play one- it’d be so cool I could play that cool song from Rainbow Rocks with the siren peopl-

Eli says I need to get back on point because he has homework 

Oh...when I was told I was ‘weird’? It’s not super happy I guess but, I get called that a lot at school. There’s a group of girls who like making fun of me a lot, say my clothes are all raggy trash and stuff, and throw stuff at me, say I’m weird...but it’s okay! I don’t mind really, if they think I’m weird- they can think I’m weird, since it makes them feel better!

If I’m weird, it means they’re not, and not feeling weird is nice, so, it’s got to make them feel good to throw things at me right? That’s what matters? Right?

Right?

Hai Lin:

Blog. You people. Started. A blog.

I’d say I’m surprised, but honestly- this is not the dumbest thing you people’ve done. Not that it says much.

Alright, though, I’ll bite. Sue’ll be happy about it.

Honestly? I’d say I’m almost there. I’ve clawed my way from poverty to queen of the underworld, there’s not a soul who wouldn’t refuse to kneel before me...well, one who’d live to say anything about it. 

I guess, if there’s one thing I do still wish for though, is a life for my little sister. I know she doesn’t like this life, even if she knows little about it, but, I don’t want her forced into the same world I was. I want to give her a good, safe, life. 

I know sometimes she gets swept up in the romantic idea of the thief, she thinks she’s the kind to swing from masts and find a Romeo and Juliet love story, with her as the criminal and them as the good boy, but, I just can’t see her as anything other than my little bird. Maybe that’s on me, but, that’s the last milestone I have before I’m where I feel I can really rest.

Rosie! (Me)

Fun fact, when I first signed up for band, I tried to get the Marimba. I cried trying to hold two mallets because I have really sensitive skin thanks to childhood eczema. Then tried Timpani, couldn’t figure it out, freaked out, quit, and refuse to go to the half of the school where the band room is to this day. 

I know. I’m a wreck. 

My defining trait, I’d say, is probably my...for lack of a better term, ‘fuck it’ mentality. I’m the kid who, and this is true, rolls around school in Heelies with a yeet or be yeeten shirt. I was voted Most Unforgettable for Senior Superlatives. Generally, in life, I try to assume that nothing matters so I may as well have fun with whatever I’m doing :)

#ask #ask challenge #I'm so so so sorry I took like fifteen years for this #thank you so much for sending this in! #Anonymous

[diveronarpg]

Congratulations, HAYLEY! You’ve been accepted for the role of MALCOLM. Admin Jen: Upon first glance, one would assume that Matthias is an easily-understood character and I believe that he’s almost underestimated in that sense. But Hayley, you showed us that there’s definitely a lot more to him than meets the eye! Revenge is the focal point in his character but it’s not the only thing that defines him and I loved how you emphasized that with all the different aspects that you explored in Matthias. I especially loved the way that you explored his relationship with his father and all the intriguing developments that you touched on in your future plots. The interview was absolutely beautiful, as well. I loved Matthias’ eloquence and his deceptive poise. I also loved the way he expressed his thoughts during the interview - it was so riveting to read. Overall, your application was astonishing and I can’t wait to see our favorite usurper on the dash! Please read over the checklist and send in your blog within 24 hours.

WELCOME TO THE MOB.

Out of Character

Alias | Hayley

Age | 21

Preferred Pronouns | She/her

Activity Level | I’m usually on daily and try and get to replies every day or at the very least every other day depending on how hectic work/school is for me at the time

Timezone | EST

Current/Past RP Accounts | this is my current rp account ;)

In Character

Character | Malcolm / Matthias Warren

What drew you to this character? | Honestly I wanted someone who wasn’t gonna be as emotionless as Regina and I wanted someone who had a strong driving force motivating their thoughts and actions and what could be a better motivator than vengeance??

So, really, who is Matthias Warren without his father?

The short answer is no one.

There is a boy within the walls of a Montague who still feels the weight of grief years later. There is a boy who had to learn the hard way that his heroes were mortal, that even the gods could fall, that idolizing only set one up for disappointment. A name he carried with pride then dug into his shoulders with the sadness it brought. He spent his whole life wanting to be just like his father, and truly, he didn’t form that identity of his own. He only wanted to be a man who was not as strong as he had grown up believing. He wanted to be a man who was now dead.

Don’t get him wrong, he still wants to be that man, but he cannot be that man without the closure he has sought for so long. He would certainly not find it in Paris. He would not even find it in the Montague ranks, not until he did the one thing that he firmly believes would bring him that closure: he would only find it when the son of a bitch that took away everything that mattered to Matthias – his father’s guidance, his surname’s association with strength and invincibility, his mother’s security – was buried in a lesser plot than that in which his father rested right now.

Basically, he won’t stop until he has Mikael Falco begging for his mercy, regardless of whether it would be true justice or not.

But then what? There is a sense of self that has been lost, or perhaps it was never there. There is a sense of self yearning to be found in Paris, but a heavy grief and burning desire for vengeance stifled it. There is a sense of self longing to be found with the Montagues, so long as they fully accept him, of course. For he is the one who ran, the one who abandoned them, and the one who returned expecting to pick up right where he had left off. At least he didn’t betray them, he would say.

Now, there is the man who ran, but is not a coward. There is the man who seeks revenge, but can wait – he has for years, and he can wait a short time longer.

Who is Matthias Warren without his father? He is careful, he is conniving, he is thorough. He is welcomed, yet an outcast. He is a man with the weight of his surname on his shoulders, determined to carry it. He is a man out for revenge and a man with something to prove – thus, perhaps, he is the most dangerous man in Verona.

What is a future plot idea you have in mind for the character? |

Revenge is a dish best served with a gun to your head. I’d love to see Matthias go about his plot to avenge his father’s death! I can see a lot of avenues with it, as well. Obviously, this includes planning (because there is never enough planning in his mind), aid from Alexander (which is a connection I would love to explore!), and confronting Mikael. He wants to know his enemy inside and out to find the best avenue to destroy him. I can see him trying to grow close to Lucrezia to gain more information, to straight up chomping at the bit when he sees an opportunity he knows he cannot take. Will he succeed? Will it turn out that his mark actually isn’t the man who killed his father? Who knows! I’d love to explore his planning leading up to what he sees is a grand moment, and to see how he will finally seize what he’s been craving for a good portion of his life.

When the storm fades, what is left but destruction? I also want to explore what comes after the revenge plot. Matthias has always been a man focused on his father, whether he is trying to emulate him or trying to avenge him. He has never truly lived for himself, though he would tell you he was before his father’s death. Whether he actually succeeds in his revenge plot, fails, or it turns out Mikael is not the man who killed Marius, the plotting and waiting are over, the time to take action has since passed, and I’d love to explore what is left, what is next. It’s definitely going to have a shaky start, for this man has no foundation to build himself upon without revenge or his father to look up to. Perhaps he will try and be like his father, but falter without the man to guide him, or perhaps he will find a side of himself he never knew existed and feel a sense of fulfillment he never would have achieved just trying to follow in another man’s footsteps.

A name is all we have. I’m interested to see how Alexander’s use for Matthias plays out! There are also a lot of avenues I can see this going, depending on the actions Alexander does or does not take in regards to helping Matthias. Perhaps it ends in him outing Matthias’s plans and him facing consequences from the Montagues – in that case, I’d love to explore the devastation he’d experience, having tarnished his Montague affiliation, the one thing he wanted to gain back and polish to perfection to honor his late father. Perhaps Alexander doesn’t oust Matthias, either for personal gain or out of fear of loss – as in, what if one of them blackmails the other? In that case, I would love to see the character dynamic, either the betrayal Matthias may feel from someone he thought was on his side (did losing your father teach you nothing about looking to others Matthias?) or the ruthlessness he shows when he fears he has everything to lose.

Are you comfortable with killing off your character? | Um hell yeah (bonus points if it’s just like how his father died)

In Depth

In-Character Interview:

Tired eyes scan a room that is much less comfortable than it tries to disguise itself as. The coloring under them suggests a late night, and knowing Matthias, it was a late night looking over notes from his own personal collection as well as lesson plans, papers mixing together, the battles of man’s past meeting the battles of his own present – well, the battles being planned in the present, and hopefully, it would not be much of a battle at all. While part of him desired a drawn out and torturous revenge, the other part impatient with his own waiting and plotting, no matter how necessary he convinced himself it was. It was something he tried not to give much thought to, for he was here, in this room, and nowhere close to Falco.

When the door opened, his head shot to the entrance – a man, certainly not his mark, entered, appearing older than he was, with a quiet, professional demeanor to him. He gave Matthias a curt greeting before taking a seat across from him, sinking into a chair that was certainly not as plush as it appeared to be, but not as firm to avoid him from leaning back a bit too far as he tried to get comfortable. Save it, Matthias thought, I’ve been trying for twenty fuckin’ minutes.

“Mr. Warren, thank you for meeting me here,” his voice had a nasal-sounding aspect. Matthias already decided he wasn’t fond of him. “I will try and make this as brief as possible.”

“Good. Make it worth my time,” he commanded, though his voice sounded slightly disinterested already. Moments here seemed to be moments wasted, already knowing he was not going to walk away from this having gained something other than perhaps a minor headache at the smell of mothballs that coated the room (the whole building, actually, thanks to a mice problem).

“Um, what is your favorite place in Verona, sir?”

“Seriously?”

“Just answer the question, please.”

Matthias sighed, but tried to at least look like he was giving it a second or two of thought before answering. “Lamberti Tower. It has a view of Verona unlike any other.” That was only a partial truth. Truly, his favorite place was his childhood home that his mother still occupied, but technically it was just outside Verona, only down the street from the city’s limits. But even then, the walls of that home felt heavy with the presence of a man who no longer occupied it, though he did not mention this to his mother when they had dinner together on Sundays.

“Good, um, what does your typical day look like?”

Matthias wondered exactly what the purpose of these questions were, but he launched into a quick explanation, hoping it would be done with quickly. Sure, he could be charming, sure, he could play the part, but this morning, tiredness weighing on him, and sitting across from a man who he’d already written off, he was not in the mood. “I wake up, get ready, and go to work. First, it’s tasks for the Montagues, then after lunch I go to teach my class on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and after that, if I have no tasks left over from earlier in the day, I go home and have dinner. Then, I work on my lesson plans. Truly, I am not Verona’s most interesting man, but you will keep that a secret between you and me, no?” Again, this was not completely true, but the hours he spent researching Mikael Falco and planning revenge years in the making did not need to be known by this man.

“Of course… And, um, we’re going to get a little deeper, now; what has been your biggest mistake thus far?”

“Wow, that is… certainly a change in tone,” commented Matthias, raising a brow on his unamused expression. For the first time, he saw the first signs of nervousness from the man before him, which, he would admit, was a bit amusing. “Not being at that bar ten years ago. Next.” His tone was hard, warning the man not to press further. If he didn’t know what happened, he should not ask, at least, for his own good.

He seemed to pick up on the hint, and Matthias realized he could not completely label this man as a moron. “What has been the most difficult task asked of you?”

“To wait. To stay. To move on from an event I’ve found shaped me. People do not understand what a person is going through if it is not the exact same way they will deal with it. That does not mean I listened to such a ridiculous request.” He did not wait before running. He did not stay when his legs told him to go. He did not move on when his father was buried, he has not moved on. He may never, at this rate. Matthias never thought about how that may have been unhealthy.

There was obviously a lot of issues to be unpacked in that answer, and issues that the man sitting across from Matthias thought were best left sealed in the boxes they arrived in. Though he didn’t like him, Matthias may have still called the man smart. “What are your thoughts on the war between the Capulets and the Montagues?”

“There has always been a war, one my father was poised to lead us to victory in. It is the way of life and of man – where there are men, there is conflict, and on a scale as large as this, conflict arises in the form of war. It is inevitable. And, like every war, there will be a victor. I can only hope I have the privilege of earning the place my father held in leading the Montagues to victory after all these years. It is the same war, after all, simply with different stakes. And Warren men do not lose, no matter the stakes, no matter the war.”

The other man may have had more questions, but the way Matthias’s voice deepened as he closed his statement, the darkness that showed in his eyes, the bloodshed imagined behind their blue hue, must have shown something to the interviewer, something he truly did not want to dig into after learning he had unchained something dark, something he may have even feared to encounter. For he gave a quick thanks to Matthias for his cooperation and politely excused himself. A weasel, but a smart weasel, in the presence of a hungry wolf.

Extras:

Matthias’s second job is as a part-time history professor at a college! Specifically, war history.

With the timeline in my head, Marius Warren was killed approximately eight years ago (four years after Matthias joined the Montagues), and Matthias returned one year ago. This gives him nine years to plot in Paris, though most of this was spent getting multiple degrees so that he could be qualified to teach college history. Ironic, considering those who ignore history are doomed to repeat it, and he does not heed the warning that maybe trying to become Marius may cause him to suffer the same fate. ((I’m open to this being flexible, though!))

Pinterest (please ignore how there is seemingly 0 order to it this new pinterest organization format sucks and won’t let me organize it to my liking so i gave up)

#accepted: malcolm #accepted

[tearlessrain]

all right time for Scorpion King: Book of Souls Liveblog Part 2

we last left bootleg xena and zach mcgowan’s abs in ancient egyptian jello narnia with a mostly naked lady who is also a book and her wildly unnecessary comic relief rock golem friend and there might even have been hints of a plot. I have a feeling it’s only downhill from here.

we’re back to the people who gallop around menacingly on horses and their completely normal bird that keeps getting screentime for some reason. their specific objectives remain unclear, as they have been for the entire movie.

oh hey they found the mad max tribe, maybe there actually was a point to the interlude earlier

shut up mediocre henchman 5 I still hate you

hm, nope, still no point to this. they just rode away again. menacingly.

please someone make the cockney rock golem stop talking

she has been trying to seduce matthias since she first came on screen and despite the fact that they’ve known each other for five minutes I have a sinking feeling that it’s going to work before this movie is over

ookay the rock golem is afraid of fire, that makes sense.

WHAT IS SO IMPORTANT ABOUT THIS BIRD IT’S A NORMAL GODDAMN BIRD IT HASN’T DONE ANYTHING

oh thank god they’re leaving the rock golem behind in jello narnia

living the dream, book lady

yep here we go with the romantic subplot nobody asked for between two people who met like three hours ago at most

is he the only man she’s ever seen because like. talk about setting the bar high

here come the menacing riders, riding menacingly

NOBODY LIKES YOU, MEDIOCRE HENCHMAN 5

oh yes I think xena’s finally gonna kill this fucker

and now we can just watch zach mcgowan kill people which is really what 90% of the movie’s content should have been in the first place

HE KILLED MEDIOCRE HENCHMAN 5 WE ARE FREE.

oh fuck the rock golem is back and they’re bringing him to a market

this movie’s plot is so vague as to be on the verge of doing a full 180 into “dadaist masterpiece”

now I’m not saying I expected better from the direct to DVD fifth sequel of a spinoff of a reboot of The Mummy but it needs to be said just once: why is the scorpion king a white guy

okay there we go back to killing people don’t worry about things like plot and why they all have vaguely british accents

ah he has learned from the last time he beat up a bunch of ninjas, no getting shot this time

[Black Sails theme playing on a single kazoo in the distance]

at least the boat’s too small for them to get any time alone together and progress the unneeded romance

oh hey it’s glowy eye dude who we haven’t seen since the prologue despite his being the main antagonist. I like that dude. mostly for his rad aesthetic.

ooooh glowy eye dude killed bootleg xena’s brother who we’ve literally never seen or heard of before book lady explained it

and apparently she’s the last remaining heir so we’ve got the queen of nubia, the king of... scorpions, I guess, a human book, and a golem all on a boat. I feel like I’ve literally been in this D&D party.

there’s that bird again seriously why, there had better be payoff for this. maybe the bird is secretly anubis or something. which would be weird, since anubis is the one with the jackal head, but I can’t think of another reason to keep drawing this much attention to it.

there had also better be a damn good payoff to the golem being afraid of fire because it’s getting really annoying

OH MY GOD A GIANT ROCK

they very clearly didn’t give zach mcgowan any direction regarding what accent he’s supposed to have because he’s just trying them all out

imagine if he’d just smashed the head clean off that stone sphynx and it turned out there was nothing in there

book lady has taken over for prologue narrator I guess

what is with this anubis, this is like a deviantart anubis. this is just “abs for days: the movie”

okay evil xena, “men are simple” isn’t really a fair thing to say considering you shot him with a poison dart. falling over after someone shoots you with a poison dart isn’t really a gendered thing. and like she didn’t try to seduce him first or anything she just walked in, shot him, and said that as if it was somehow relevant.

oh it’s the mad max tribe yet again. maybe THIS time they’ll have a purpose.

nope they’re just here to comment as the plot coincidentally passes them on the way to somewhere else. okay.

okay so maybe the blacksmithing and hunting and badass fighting and full on nudity haven’t been enough to distract you from how bad the writing is. don’t worry fam we’ve got you.

it’s like they’ve got a checklist or something

at least the ugly and useless leather armor thing is gone though

okay know what as an aside, shoutout to this random ass bird that gets almost as much screentime as the actual protagonist yet has done nothing except completely normal bird things for the entire movie

“before I kill him let’s see how he fights” well you just signed your own death sentence. see even your wife who can see the fourth wall knows this is a mistake.

glow eye dude is entirely too good of an actor for the lines he was given, this is like watching jeremy irons in eragon

wow I mean you could just kill book lady, setting her on fire seems excessive.

uh I was joking before but he appparently actually is the literal king of scorpions. and getting stung by them is I guess what activates his powers. being the scorpion king SUCKS.

wow it didn’t half work though, he just samsoned right out of those chains. good thing it wasn’t a bamboo and string cage, or he would have been trapped for good.

hell yeah finally a showdown between glow eye dude and zach mcgowan. this is why I’m here.

wait, the mad max tribe is back. maybe THIS time they’ll do something relevant!

yeah there they go. finally. killed psychic wife

random bird approves.

and now it’s just everybody fighting everybody so in other words the movie is looking up

evil xena vs good xena FIGHT

I can’t believe the fucking golem was the one who finally destroyed the sword.

so now the mcguffan is just freaking gone and matthias and evil guy are just punching the shit out of each other for the hell of it and I’m not even mad

I mean I guess one of them still has to be defeated but still

he just fuckin Simba’d that guy right into the fire

like can we please take a moment to appreciate that this is the exact fight choreography and aesthetic from the lion king

to the point that there was a literal lion roar sound as the guy died??? I’m not even kidding what the hell

“and we helped!” - the mad max tribe

oh the sword wasn’t destroyed. but at least the rock golem is gone so that’s something.

“remember who you aaaaaare” - the mad max tribe

ooooh he must choose between destroying the evil sword and the life of book lady, his true love who he met yesterday

I mean don’t get me wrong I’m sad to see her go she was one of the least annoying characters, but still you could have cut out the mad max tribe and developed her more so this would have more impact

aaaand THERE’s the obligatory tragic kiss

honestly though know what I can’t begrudge her this, it’s not like I wouldn’t do the same thing if I were a human book living alone in a tomb and some absurdly attractive dude just showed up one day and was like “climb on my horse so we can gallop sexily across a beach.” that’s completely reasonable.

matthias... I don’t feel so good...

(I’m sorry I had to)

that looks like it should be the cover of a drug store romance novel. maybe after the cowboy fad dies the next one will be “white guys who are kings of ancient egypt for absolutely no discernable reason”

NARRATOR! I missed you my dude.

he never forgot his destiny again. still no mention of exactly what his destiny is or even what exactly he’s king of aside from about two dozen literal scorpions

but seriously “getting stung by scorpions” is the absolute worst superpower ever. no wonder he abandoned his destiny to be a blacksmith, I would too.

there he goes

well that was pretty much exactly what I expected it to be but somehow even more so. gratuitous fanservice and absolutely no substance or meaningful plot, 10/10 would not watch again but had a great time watching it once. roughly on par with Eragon but this time ancient egypt flavored.

that bird never ended up doing anything, by the way. 10/10 completely useless but extremely photogenic bird.

#tearless liveblogs #some say the cameraman is still following that bird around to this day #filming it as it continues to do regular bird things

[incorrect-ego-quotes]

It's December 1st. Whose screaming Christmas carols, whose baking Christmas treats, whose decorating, who doesn't care, whose putting up mistletoe everywhere, whose shopping for presents every second, who forgot presents, who purposely didn't get presents and whose constantly asking for a puppy? (Sorry this so long, I just kept getting ideas!)

IM SORRY THIS IS DAYS LATE BUT I L O V E CHRISTMAS I HAVE TO DO THIS ONE. ALSO FORGIVE ME THIS IS /LONG AS FUCK/--the ipliersthe jim twins are as excited as, well, a kid on christmas morning. wearing santa hats, candy canes in their mouths, they even decorated their mic in red and green ribbon. the two practically shrieking out christmas songs -- much to everyone's annoyance "CHESTNUTS ROASTING ON AN OPEN FIRE--""jesus christ," dark snaps, "can you two knock it off?! it's only the first--""WOULD YOU LIKE A MORE MODERN SONG OF JOY." jim twin #1 asks, holding up a worn book of christmas carols -- the same one they've had since they were 4. passed on from dear old Mother Jim."no! this season is so grossly happy and joyful -- leave me to work--""I, DONT WANT A LOT FOR CHRISTMAS." jim twin #2 starts off as dark covers his ears. why did they have to be the loudest egos? why cant they see how shitty of a holiday christmas is?!"THERE IS JUST ONE THING I NEED, DONT CARE ABOUT--"dark gets an idea and smirks. knowing one way he can get them to leave him alone. "santa isn't real."the two twins share an offended and angry look, mouths open, did he just?!"christmas was a pagan festival of gifts before being appropriated by romans based on the Odin myth."the jim twins cringe, holding their dear caroling book closer -- he...he has to be lying!"who is the god of war and death."the jim twins turn away offended as all hell. jim twin #1 throwing a candy cane in dark's face and hissing. "SHUN THE NONBELIEVER, JIM.""SHUN."they then run off to go do whatever christmas activity next -- dark hoping they won't take this caroling /publicly/.******ed edgar and silver shepherd are cooking in the kitchen. ed is a surprisingly good cook -- especially around the holidays. just ask anyone who's been to his thanksgiving or christmas dinners. silver only tagged along because he was tired of dark being a joy sucker out of the season."now," ed chuckles, "we're gon' need about a store's worth of flour.""...what?! wh--ed, why do we need a store's worth.""uh, /excuse you, youngin'/," ed points at his pink and white apron. almost annoyed, "this apron calls me chef in charge 'round here. you follow, don't question.""ed. first of all, that's wilford's apron. second of all, we probably only need one bag at most for gingerbread cookies. why would we need a--""listen. i'm only making one gingerbread man fo' everybody 'round here -- i take home the rest.""how...much exactly is the rest?""350."silver shepherd sighs, taking off his mask and gloves. ed still smiling away as if his idea was normal. well, no arguing with a stubborn man like ed. he grabs his car keys from the table as ed follows him, "your limit is 50 dollars for the ingredients." he mumbles. "i knew you'd come 'round!" ed wraps an arm around silver, "we're gon' have so much fun with these lil old cookies! i even have a homemade sugar icing recipe! i'll even make a lil cape fo' yours!" he silently doubted it but hey, its a hell of a lot better than spending his free time with an angry and annoyed dark. ******bim tugged the host along, holding onto the sleeve of his trenchcoat gently as he lead him into the meeting room. the tall green christmas tree standing proudly in the corner. decorations of red and green and gold littered the meeting room's table. the smell of pine hits the host before anything -- taking him back to his own cabin in the woods long ago. the trees covering him away from the world as he...the host shook his head. he hated those memories. he hated those dark times. he hated it all."wilford put us in charge of the tree this year," bim smiled to himself, "i know its a challenge with erm...""i'm blind?""yeah, that." bim sighs, grabbing the box of lights and unrolling them gently, handing the ball to the host, who held it with a strange look on his face."w-what's poking me?""lights, silly!" bim giggles. the sound making the host blush and laugh along. any time bim was happy, he was happy. "now, i'm gonna loop around the tree. you just follow along, yeah? tell me if ya get dizzy and we can slow down.""the host nods, holding the bundle of lights close to his chest. ready for the decorations -- reminding him of his most favorite time of year."bim shakes his head and laughs, "you can't ever turn that off, can you?""the host cannot."the two start off steady and slow. the host following bim's footsteps. he could hear the jim twins playing 'i'll be home for christmas' in the next room over -- their office space. "those two can never get tired of christmas, i swear.""the host reminds bim that it's worse for him since his own office is right next door to the twins."bim giggles, "well, hope ya like christmas as much as them." it's when bim giggles does the host wish he had his sight back. what'd he give to see his smile (although, according to dark, it looks like his -- he doubt it. bim was handsome, charming, while his smile held back pain he swallowed down.)in those small moments of thinking and wishing, the host stays in place. the lights tangling as bim gets wrapped up with the host, groaning as the tree falls gently against them. the two tied chest to chest, bim's hands resting on the host's hips. "um..." bim laughs nervously, blushing away, "hostie, bud, we're tangled.""i...is that you against me?""yeah...i'll -- i'll get us out!!"the music drowns out bim's struggles as he pulls at the lights. the host's thoughts screaming at him -- tell him!! now's your chance!! confess!!"i love...i love--""hmm?" bim perks up, "sorry, wasn't listening, what do you love?""t...this song!! i, i love it, it's my favorite christmas song."he stops and hears bim laugh again, humming along, "its a good song."the host goes along with the lie, singing along as bim rests his head on the host's shoulder to get around to the lights behind him. "if only in my dreams."yeah, only in his dreams -- bim had matthias, what did he have? nothing but his dreams of what could be with the two of them. at least, for a moment, he had the courage to change that. maybe that's what he'll ask for this year; courage. ******dark crossed his arms and continued to work in his office. he could smell cookies baking, he could hear christmas songs being sung, and he could see holly being hung in the halls. how stupid -- the other egos should be /working!/ do they think they can take over mark's channel with all this fooling around?! he slams the laptop he'd been using shut and stares out his window. even the fuckin' /city/ was covered in red and green, fake reindeer and sleighs all around, snowmen (who bought fake snow to LA?!) waving in the cold breeze. he face palms himself. a headache coming on. he hated winter, he hated christmas, he hated everything about the holidays.it...brought back memories he didn't want to dwell on. memories of christmas morning...in a mansion of some sort. fuzzy memories of a woman, a man, and that damned mark -- all enjoying...hot chocolate with marshmallows. opening gifts like.../a family/."heeeeey darkidoo," wilford bursts into his office. the jim twins still throwing (sharpened to a point) candy canes at dark's door. "what do you want, wil?""geez," he shuts the door, dark's back turned towards him, "what's up with the jims? ya do something?""other than not engaging them in their childish behavior -- not, i did nothing." he sighs, "did you finish the weekly schedule for this month's programming on Markiplier TV?""gimmie another day--""damnit, wil! stop -- just stop! stop with this foolish nonsense, this holly jolly bullshit! i hate this season and i hate the way it makes everyone--" he stops as he hears wilford set down something on his desk and wrap an arm behind him. hugging him. "dark," he sighs, "just...take it easy, okay? it's december -- at least be happy the year's almost over, and be happy you still got us. hell, be happy some egos are working like doc and google." he smiles, "just...be happy we're all still here to celebrate the season. and nobody's gone."there's silence as dark hangs his head low. "i'll leave you alone for a while. i gotta confiscate the candy canes from the jims. i'll see you at home, dark."he squeezes around dark once more and moves to leave, stopping before he opens the door, "oh! i...i found that while looking for the christmas tree in the storage back home. i...i have a feeling it's yours. broke it in for ya!" he laughs as he leaves. dark turns around to see a black mug with a cursive 'D' on it. an intense emotion of...nostalgia rushing over him despite not remembering the mug. he stares out the window again as he holds the hot mug to him. he looks down to see hot chocolate and marshmallows. he smiles and sips the hot drink. this season isn't so bad after all with people like wilford in his life.--the septiceyesthis...was going to be the best surprise, marvin thought to himself. thanks to a new trick he'd learned -- he successfully figured out how to move the mistletoe to wherever he wanted, as if he had hung them everywhere. he was sure it'd be a laugh to see everyone's reactions. making anti kiss the pizza delivery guy, making dr. schneeplestein kiss whatever old patient he was seeing, maybe making robbie kiss his reflection. it'd be hilarious nonetheless. marvin, the marvelous magician, shall wow and dazzle his fellow egos!!he hid behind the couch in the lobby of their headquarters, where they hold their meetings, and waited.and waitedand waited/and waited/.growing tired as nobody walked by, had they found out about his plan? did nobody just need to come this way?he saw jackieboy man walk by and perked up, using his wand to move the mistletoe closer under him, rushing out the door to call him back as he left."j-jackie!! hey...oh shit," he looked up as he noticed he was directly under the mistletoe.jackieboy raised an eyebrow before looking up. "aha, you want to meet me here?" he smirks, catching marvin's chin in his fingers, flipping down his mask and red hoodie, soft green hair cascading down his face. a blush crossing marvin's cheek."just us two? alone here, the christmas decorations and lights lighting up your face so softly...""um, i mean--""here? under..." jackieboy looks up. suggestive. marvin not knowing if it was humanly possible to blush anymore."jackie...""THE MISTLEFOE?!""wha--" he ducked as jackieboy tackled him, wrestling him to the floor as chase and anti walked by. anti shouting as chase winced."get the magic nerd!! get the magic nerd!!" anti shouts"THE HELL IS A MISTLEFOE?!" marvin yells as he taps out with his wand from jackieboy man's headlock. ripping away his cat mask."pssh, the mistlefoe!! put two people under that," jackieboy points to the mistletoe, "and have 'em duke it out, fight and stuff. you dont know about the best winter tradition?""erm...its actually meant for the two to--" chase is cut off as marvin uses his wand to seal his lips shut, chase giving him the middle finger and pointing to his lips.marvin used his magic to burn the magic mistletoe attached to the doorframe. cringing as jackieboy man helped him up. helping him walk to dr. schneep's office"better luck next year, magic boy!!""....i hate working here," marvin coughs as he waits for the doctor. this, was going to be a very long winter. ******the doctor clocks out early, waving goodbye to the other egos....at 10 am, after working for 45 minutes."dude, ya can't just up and leave!! we need help with decorating!! and baking the cookies!!" jackieman boy yells as chase nearly stumbles carrying in the tree. "i must!!" the doctor yells, "chase, you are in charge until i get back at...well, just know you're all working late tonight!"chase gives a thumbs up, pointing at anti as he walks by, already directing them all.the drive to the mall isn't too long, he runs towards the opening, still in his doctor uniform. this time of year was perfect for his giving heart. already having a mile long list of gift ideas for every one of the egos in his pocket, his credit card with his savings from all his paychecks since last year loaded onto it -- no price limit for anyone!! and he finally healed from his injuries after black friday and cyber monday!! (hey, those internet shoppers are no joke)he practically skips into the mall with glee at the decorations. giant christmas gift boxes, fake snow, even a 'winter wonderland' with a fake santa -- wait...was that his patient bobby dressed up? bobby with the bad smoking habit?"i hope he cleaned up for the kiddies," schneep says to himself as he rushes into the first store -- a new camera for chase on the top of his list!!he gets everyone everything -- new knife collection for anti!! a new tux for marvin!! every single marvel movie for jackieboy man!! stuffed animals and candy for robbie!! a top hat for dapper jack!!and that's just for the first day of december, he plans to do this all until christmas eve, already having different wrapping for each ego's gift. until he sees it. his own personal wish. the 35 book set of medical mysteries -- all in order, and all for him.until another hand touches the set too. dr. iplier staring at him from the other side of the shelf. downright glaring. "henrik.""edward."the two stare back in spite -- no, schneep /needed this/. he worked too damn long this year to be bested by some quack doctor ego."aha," schneep laughs, obviously fake, "what are you doing here?""shopping for christmas. i was just looking at this book set i wanted for myself."fuck. schneep tugs on the set. dr. iplier's hand not going away. "oh, really?" he smiles coldly, "so. was. i."dr. iplier tugs, schneep tugs, the two turning into a tug of war before schneep pulls him against the wooden shelf in the bookstore, yelling as they fight it out. the early morning shoppers crowding around them, recording as schneep hold dr. iplier in a headlock. "THOSE BOOKS ARE MINE, YOU PRICK.""OVER MY DEAD BODY, QUACK.""OH THAT CAN BE ARRANGED, BITCH.""TRY ME, YOU ASSHOLE."schneep pulls out the scalpel he keeps in his pocket. the two fighting more, knocking displays over and taking it outside to the winter wonderland exhibit. children running and screaming as they crash into santa's sleigh. finally -- they're broken apart by santa (bobby). schneep grabbing his items from the bookstore and rushing out the mall. not wanting to deal with police or security. wiping away tears as he drives back. thankfully -- good old smoking santa (bobby), his faithful patient, was head of security at the mall. "its christmas," he later told schneep on the phone (and dr. iplier), "just...stay outta the mall for a good two days and i'll pretend not a single thing happened"schneep wiped away tears as he layer learned -- hey, the bookstore had tons of copies of the book set they were fighting over, that was just a display!he, however blushes as chase, anti, and robbie crowd around chase's phone. the video from his fight going viral online. "doc!! you're trending under #ThoseBooksAreMine!! that's awesome as hell, you'll be a meme!!" chase praises. schneep shakes his head. nursing the black eye he has. he knows it'll be worth it when he sees their laughing and happy faces on christmas day.because he knows damn well, marvin would forget presents and anti would die before he got presents for anyone else.******"a puppy!!" chase smiles as he walks into their ego headquarters with anti. heavy coats and scarves on. a smaller dog being walked by a young boy trotting on. "ew." anti drinks the starbucks chase bought him, "dogs are gross--"chase gasps, "i...am offended on behalf of all dogs, dude!!" "what? its a dirty animal that tracks mud and barely listens.""sure you're not describing yourself, dude?" chase jokes as anti rolls his eyes. "how could you want a little disgusting creature like that?""they're cute, they're playful, they cuddle up to ya when its cold, they bark!!" chase goes on and on, sitting down in the meeting room as they wait for the others, "they keep ya company, they nip at ya when they're hungry, they...they love you unconditionally...they...won't be taken away from ya," he stops, sniffling. tears forming in his eyes, memories of christmases long gone hitting him. seeing his son and daughter excitedly wake up him and stacey to open gifts. going ice skating. baking cookies.shit."...chase?"chase shakes his head and wipes a tear, "sorry, bro. i...i'm just caught up in my feelings. this time of year and, missing my kids."anti looks down into his coffee cup. damn, chase has been through a lot. he's the only ego who keeps it together -- not like him who just...glitches out at emotions. "...it's fine." anti grumbles under his scarf, "i'm sure this christmas will be...okay.""really?" "...yeah, really. even with that stacey keeping the kids, this christmas will be worthwhile. i mean, we got...decorating and shit to do today. that'll take your mind off it, right?""y-yeah, and the kids are suppose to call after school...and, and stacey's letting me come to their christmas play!! you're right, for once, anti!!" chase smiles and hugs him, anti awkwardly patting back. "okay...hug's been too long, don't push it chase.""sorry."...everyone had called chase a dumbass to give a copy of his apartment keys to anti. everyone had doubted anti would show any spirit in the season. everyone had doubted chase would get anything he really wanted for christmas, even schneeplestein.anti snuck into chase's apartment that christmas eve. chase down for the night in his bedroom. a small 4 foot christmas tree decorated in lights and ordainments in the corner of his living room. a letter from his kids (that anti skimmed through) on the table. "let's prove all those dicks back at hq wrong," he whispers to the bundle in his arms. setting it under the tree. it'd been absolute hell to get anyone to allow him to take home chase's gift. grunting as he sat on the couch and nodded off into sleep. the dalmatian puppy slept too, a red collar around it's neck, tail wagging in its sleep as it was thankful for anti for getting him out of the cold shelter. excited to meet his new master in the cold christmas morning.

[reactionjournal]

Shadow and Bone 8

NO MOURNERS

Matthias and Nina...? What are we doing here? I mean I missed them don’t get me wrong I’m just confused. We’re not doing this to kill him are we....????

Oh they’re impossibly cute I looove them. Oh they’re so sweet. 

“I will keep you warm” 🥺🥺🥺

“Is there meat in this?” He’s so confusedddd I love him

Ohhhhhhhhh gosh. Oh gosh oh gosh oh gosh. Nina. Oh NINA. NINA MY LOVE. (Wow she’s beautiful she’s so beautiful)

LOOK AT HER

“You’re already at war with Fjerda, heartrender. You want a new one with my country?” Is. Excellent.

Well, I don’t know why we went down that road but I loved it. Is it just so they continue their storyline in a hopeful next season? I do love that.

GOD EVERY TIME KAZ FIGURES SOMEONE OUT. HE HAS LIKE A +4 modifier I LOVE HIM

“If he isn’t with Kirigan’s crew he’s with ours.” YESSSS 

Alina honey it’s weird that you still believed him about it

“They have the advantage.” “Only because I’m not in the game.” I. LOVE. HIM.

Wow, Zoya overcame her racism upon realizing that the man willing to kill hundreds of people was a bigger threat 

YES JESPER YES INEJ MAKE HIM FUCKING BLEED, MY LOVES, MY DARLINGS

Oh he’s doing that bullshit again. 

“It will take more than this.” INEJ, with dozens more knives: Granted.

Hannibal’s back!!! Mads, we need you!!! help us do a murder

Hannibal, entering as a vision: Alina, use the knife ME: 😭😭 OMG IT IS HIM

OH SHE CUT IT OUT OF HIM!!!!!! YOOOOO DOPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BLAST HIS ASS

Oh heartrender. Bullshit. 

“How dare you” MOTHERFUCKER HOW DARE YOU!!! Get your powers off of Jesper!

HAHAHAHA oh my god. Nicely done, Mal.

WOW LOL Truly, why would they care anything for you but hatred, my guy. 

“I’ve never met a saint before.” 😭😭😭omg she said it. It’s one of her saints in the books and she SAId the line that makes sense.

OMG OMG NAME IT SANKTA ALINE YES 

THE DEAL IS THE DEAL THE DEAL IS THE DEAAAAAALLLLLLLLL YESSSS

Also, I love that she managed to get through to him. Kaz wouldn’t have accepted a gift, but a deal? Oh yeah.

Oh we BASICALLY started Crows!!! If there’s three seasons for the 3 Aline books, then the duology fits neatly into those remaining two seasons. wait are there four books....no three, right?

“But she is a saint.” He loves Inej so much. 

“Ghost” means “SURVIVORS”? Ohhhhh oh ho ho ho hhoooooooooooo YES

Oh an ARMY. WOW

WOW WHAT A FUCKIN SHOW

[angelicteeth]

💖 trc, tfc ;), criminal minds, the 100, tlc, doctor who? sure, aaddtsotu lOL why not, soc, ao!!, gangsta., narutoooooo (sasuuukeeee)

you know, amber, now i have to PUBLICLY admit my love for everyone. thanks.

the raven cycle: im still so mad that i fell in love with him, sometimes i pause and think ‘hey, i could go back!’ but i cant. i can never go back. im stuck, now. im kind of obsessed with all of my faves, who isn't, but he MIGHT take the cake (for right now) and the only way to describe how much i love him is that it hurts. its painful to love him but i dont mind it. its dramatic but ??? its how i FEEL and sometimes i hate it and its so overwhelming, how much love. have for him. he is beautiful and charming and an idiot and needs a hug, probably. i just want to listen to him talk all day or go on dumb adventures with him and just. be there for him. alright im done sedrftgyhu bye its gansey

the foxhole court: kevin fucking day. there are not enough words to describe how much or why i love kevin but he is. great. the best. deserves better aND IS NOT A FUCKING COWARD ALRIGHT HE ISNT FUCK YOU

criminal minds: spencer reid is my absolute fave he is so sweet he deserves so much better pl s,,, let him rest… give him a break…

the 100: 1000% murphy. john murphy. he deserves the WORLD ok do you HEAR ME he deserves the world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he is so good!!!!!! deserves better!!!!! cant wait for season 5 im gonna die !!!!!

the lunar chronicles: wolf!!! wolf wolf wolf!!!!! i love that man he is so sweet him and scarlet are Good but i do love him a lot rdftgyhj im also kinda in love with cinder 

doctor who: i have multiple answers for this, as i have more than 1 favorite for which doctors i love and which companions i love. my favorite doctor has to be the 9th doctor, honestly. i just fell in love with him immediately, he was my first doctor and really shaped the show for me. i dont see how anyone could skip him. i also really love 11, hes my 2nd favorite doctor. as for companions DONNA NOBLE HAS MY WHOOOLLLLLEEE HEART. her ending always makes me fucking cry my heart out. ))))): she was gonna be doctor donna… i also love river song, who ? is technically a companion ? yeah. i have a pop funko of her LOL 

ari n dante: honestly, i think it’s aristotle. i LOVE Dante with my whole heart but ari……Might be my fave…love those boys….

six of crows: can i just say wylan and matthias and pretend i dont know who i actually love? yeah? good. its fucking kaz brekker god dammit

all out!!: sEKIZAN TAKUYA HAS MY WHOLE FAT HEART HE IS MY BABY I LOVE THAT MAN SOOOOOO MUCH I WOULD DIE FOR HIM HE IS AN ANGEL HAVE YOU SEEN HIS SMILE?????? HAVE YOU SEEN HOW MUCH HE CARES??????????? A GOOD ASS BOY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

gangsta.: gangsta. is SO fuckin good man. really need to rewatch it from the beginning, honestly. but! my boy! nicolas! ahhhhhh! love him

naruto: mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm fuckin shikamaru…. dumbass virgo… also love kakashi and neji

#why did i reblog this again? #mistakes #were made #theres 2 more asks after this LOL #so many boys #so many

[little-owly]

Can you plz do mat//tip//liar smut mommy?

here you go, cutie!! first time writing smut for them, so let me know if you like it!! :D

–

The soft glow of the morning sun shined through the window, through the thin maroon curtains – giving a red shade to the white bedroom. Among the messy and and knotted blankets was Matthias, happily sleeping away. Curled up against his lover’s pillow – the cinnamon scent of his hair still on the pillow’s soft surface. His dreams filled with bit and pieces of his lover, from holding his hand to more explicit images. Images involving his body, his muscles, his hand in his hair as he’d pull him into a passionate kiss.

All that went away when he was awoken by the sound of the bathroom door swinging open. The gentle steam from the shower moving into the room as Mark emerged from the doorway. His tanned skin glistening with the warm water, his hair damp with droplets of water falling on his shoulders. The towel around his waist barely hanging as he moved his wet bangs.

“Mornin’ Matt,” Mark smiled. A shiver running up Matthias’s spine – Mark’s smile still getting to him since the day they’ve met. Practically bright enough to light up the city.

He was perfect.

Matthias yawned and blushed, “good morning, Mark. Why’re up to early? Isn’t it your day off?”

“Yeah, but I feel like going out today, ya know? Maybe hiking – when was the last time we ever did that?”

Matthias’s back popped, giggling, “my back may be opposed to that.”

“Whatever you say, old man,” Mark laughed as he approached Matthias on the bed. The bed dipping with the extra weight, “besides, I only came out here because you were making some noise.”

He gulped.

Oh no.

“Well, I make lots of noises,” Matthias snapped back, “gotta be more specific.”

“Always the sassy one, you are.” Mark kissed along Matthias’s cheek. His wet hair grazing Matthias’s warm skin. So inviting, Mark finding it irresistible to not nuzzle into his neck.

“I mean, the noises you make when you’re face down. When you’re begging for me to fill you up. When you’re moaning while I sink myself deep inside you.”

Matthias gasped slowly, his once half hard cock already throbbing to its full length as Mark nibbled on his ear. Whispering closely – so close he could feel his stubble, “I mean the noises you make when we make love.”

Matthias laughed, “‘make love’? Seriously?”

“…you know I’m trying to be romantic, right?”

“Mark, I appreciate that you’re trying but dripping wet all over my favorite pajamas and blanket,” Matthias held up the corner of his duvet for emphasis, “is making this silly.”

“Oh yeah? Well you having a wet dream about me when I’m only a few feet away is pretty silly too.” Mark pouted, smiling as Matthias shut up. Knowing his lover was far too shy during intimate moments. Never uttering a curse or dirty phrase until he got to /that/ point. The point of no return before cumming all over himself.

“…I…I just–”

“No need to explain to me, beautiful,” Mark kissed up and down his neck. His soft lips leaving behind gentle marks. Marks of possession – so everyone knew Matthias was his and his alone.

“Do you want me?” He asks. Voice low. Rushed excitement ran throughout Matthias’s body, clouding his mind with obscene wants.

“Yes,” he huffed, moving away from Mark to wrestle his clothes off. Looking back as Mark straddled him. Slowly, Mark moved the towel off. He exposed his lower stomach and small trail of dark hair to Matthias. Smiling as his lover groaned. The towel finally being thrown off and left on the bedroom floor.

Mark took his time working up Matthias. His lips and teeth teasing and biting his warmed pale skin. Purple and pink bruises appearing before him. Smirking as Matthias blushed and hid his face behind his hands.

“You bruise so easily,” Mark commented as he moved down to tease the pink buds on Matthias’s chest, “such a sensitive beauty you are. I bet I could get you to cum just by licking up and down your body. Reaching your most sensitive spots–”

“Oh my /God/, Mark,” he huffed. Mark moving his tongue over Matthias’s left nipple. Sucking and biting at the bud as his other hand pinched his other. Matthias arching his back as sparks ran up his spine, shaking. So in love with Mark – with his dirty talk, with his careful touches, with his amazing mouth. Just…everything about /him/ drove Matthias insane.

Then, he pulled off. Sucking and kissing down to Matthias’s body. Matthias’s quiet whines growing as Mark finally took hold of his cock. Throbbing against his stomach as he blushed.

“What do you want, beautiful? My mouth or my hands?”

“Mmmfh,” he shook his head. Matthias’s voice caught in his chest – he could never get use to talking about what he exactly wants in bed. Finding himself shy and nervous as a virgin when talking during sex. Heat radiated through his stomach and chest as he lifted his head up.

“M-mouth, please Ma–!”

The name died on his lips as he moaned. Mark picking up his cock to lap at the head of it. Licking at the pink head of his cock and sucking gently on it. His teeth grazing ever so lightly, adding to the pleasure for them.

Matthias nearly came in his mouth alone when he looked down. Mark’s dark brown eyes staring into Matthias’s ocean blue eyes. Mark moved down further Matthias’s length. His teeth just barely grazing the heated skin. The head of his cock reaching the back of Mark’s throat. Mark effortlessly taking it all. His tongue swirling around under his cock to make Matthias’s toes curl. Smiling as he felt his small hand gently pet his hair.

Mark moaned ever so gently as he pulled off. Matthias’s legs spreading open.

“Ready, beautiful? Or do you want to use my mouth a little more?”

“R-ready, Mark.” He huffed, “not gonna l-last long.”

“Aww, what’s a matter? Did your wet dream work you up enough? Need me to fill you up, make you cum just by my dick inside your needy hole?”

Matthias whimpered, nodding and hiding his face again.

Matthias didn’t think it was humanly possible to blush any harder before he heard the cap of the lube being undone. Mark’s mouth kissing around his thighs as he pushed one lubed finger in. Allowing Matthias to grow use to the feeling before adding in another, then another. Spreading and stretching his hole open – the familiar burn exciting Matthias more. His cock throbbing as he grew eager to be filled by his lover. His dirty little dreams coming true before his eyes.

Mark continued to push in and out of Matthias before he whined, looking up and nodding. Signaling he’s ready for Mark.

“God, you look so beautiful,” Mark smiled, using the lube to jerk himself, “you beautiful and fragile. Getting split open by my dick, moaning my name out and letting everyone know who’s making you feel this good.”

“Y-yes, Mark,” he cried, “please! Use me – fill me up, I need you so bad, baby!”

With a smirk and a nod, Mark finally positioned himself in between Matthias’s legs. Hitching one of his legs on his shoulder as he pressed himself in slowly. Gasping as his hard cock was swallowed up in the tight heat of Matthias’s entrance. Groaning as he inched himself in further and further.

“Oh /fuck/, beautiful, you’re so fucking tight around me. Made for me to fuck you, made to take my fat cock.”

Matthias whimpered as the burning pain mixed into pleasure. His thighs shaking as he circled his hips down against Mark’s crotch, “ready, baby.”

“Aww, so eager to be fucked,” Mark teased before pulling back and slamming into Matthias. The other’s eyes widening as he /yelled/. His cock bouncing against his own stomach as he was fucked senseless by Mark. Mark’s own hips snapped back and forth into Matthias. Heat coiling in his stomach as he looked down to see his lover utterly lost for words. Pink blush spread over his face, a thin sheet of sweat covering his body, and his eyes looking back at his.

Mark looked down and groaned, knowing if he looks into Matthias’s blue eyes any longer he’d cum. He focuses on him. On the way his body responds to his movements. On the way he cried and moaned when he hit that special spot inside him. On the way he grabbed and pulled Mark down for a passionate kiss. Their tongues and lips colliding with ease. Matthias moaning into his mouth and biting down on his lips. Desperate and shaking – so close, so close to that edge he’d been craving.

“Fuck me harder–” Matthias finally moaned. All shame and embarrassment thrown out the window as lust clouded his mind, “fuck me deeper – c'mon baby, you can do better than that. Fuck me! Fuck me! Make me scream!”

“/shit/,” Mark groaned, “where’s that talk been all this time–”

“Shut up, use me like a fleshlight and fuck me harder! C'mon baby – oh /fuck/!”

Mark panted as Matthias squeezed his inner walls around his cock. Hitting his prostate dead on. Their bodies overworked and sweaty. Their hurried movements making their bed hit against the wall. Creaking with their thrusts.

“Mark! Mark, come with me, baby – fill me up with your cum, c'mon! Oh – s-shit! Mark!” was all Matthias could get out before holding Mark closer, kissing him roughly. White hot cum decorating his lower stomach and crotch. Throbbing cock sandwiched between the two.

“So fuckin’ beautiful – just for me, all for me. You’re all mine, fuck! Fuck!”

Mark followed soon after. Eyes screwed shut as he pushed his hips forward, cumming deep inside Matthias. Doing just as Matthias begged him to do, fill him up. A bit of his cum leaking out the side of Matthias’s hole as he mewled. The heat deep inside both of them satisfied. So spent and exhausted, but well worth it all.

Matthias and Mark stayed in their position for a while. Moving away from each others’ lips as they enjoyed the sleepy afterglow of their shared orgasm.

“I love you, so much.” Matthias huffed, reaching up to kiss Mark’s cheek innocently. His own lips red and slightly swollen from the whole affair.

“I love…y-you too, beautiful.” He laughed quietly, “good morning.”

***

Bryan, who had spent the night downstairs in Mark and Matthias’s shared apartment, learned three things that day.

1 – Matthias is a screamer during sex.

2 – Mark has the dirtiest mouth he’s ever heard during sex. Including his own experiences and porn.

3 – He really should’ve brought headphones or stayed with J-F//red last night. No way could he ever get over the sounds of his own boss and friend’s…er…/lovemaking/.