#I'm pretty sure someone has said this before but!

[vampiresbloodx]

warnings(18+ ONLY): smut, sub!reader, Dom!Wanda, vaginal fingering, dirty talk, teasing, blow jobs (on strap), spitting, slight praise, more degradation, rough s/x, strap on use, all of it is consensual, petnames use (good girl, baby).

emo!gf!Wanda uses you however she pleases and you gladly let her.

The first time she got a taste of you, she was obsessed. No, that wasn't a joke. No one has ever seen her been like this before about anyone. You bring out a completely different side to her than not even her best friend could know about.

Wanda claimed she didn't like girls, she always told herself she wasn't a lesbian and denied any rumours surrounding that.

It wasn't that she was ashamed, she didn't give zero fucks about their opinions. Maybe a little. That's what she was known for, her no bullshit attitude, the resting bitch face, someone to not fuck with.

Then she met you.

The cute adorable nerd who's too shy for their own good.

Wanda wanted to have you all to herself, and she did.

No one was allowed to touch you, flirt with you, go as far as to ask you out.

She would kill them.

Only you'd have to stop her from even putting them in the hospital.

Even if you were left alone for a few hours, minutes, seconds, if someone tried to come at you, she would randomly pop up out of nowhere scaring the hell out of them.

But not you.

She liked that.

She really liked you.

What she liked most was making you come as many times as she wanted. How you squirm under her gaze and touch, just one look and you're begging on your knees, it drives her insane. She has to use you.

You gladly accept it. Because you know she likes you. That's all you wanted.

You've had a crush on her for as long as you can remember, and you weren't the type to crush on people easily. Sure, they'd come, but they would never last that long.

And yet with Wanda, you knew you'd do anything she asked. She was the prettiest girl you've ever met, you just wanted her attention, her everything.

Wanda knew that too.

And she used it to her advantage.

"aw, is my pretty baby already soaking wet?" She cooed, slipping her fingers inside of your tight hole, moaning when she feels your walls clench around her. "Fucking hell, I've never fucked anyone who's pussy was just dripping, begging to be touched."

You whined, bucking your hips into her but she forced them down, glaring at you.

"now, you know I'm gonna have my way with you, I'll let you come once I know you've behaved well, don't move" she demanded.

Your body shuddered, somehow you listened, you always did.

There were times where you liked being a brat, getting the worst out of her was fun, however, this time you really didn't want to mess around.

"good girl" she cooed gently, her voice sending a shiver down your spine, she didn't waste anytime, nor did she back down with starting slow and easy, practically splitting you open with her fingers hard enough that'll make you cry.

Wanda smiled wickedly, watching your every move and reaction, your mouth gaped open, your eyes never leaving hers, fuck, it drove her wild.

"aw, does someone wanna come?" She teased, slowing her movements. "Hmm, it seems this pretty pussy is ready for my cock, don't you think?" She said, loving the way your eyes widened, pupils dilated at the sound of that.

She pulled her pants down, releasing her long, lengthy strap that she kept hidden to surprise you. It was one of her favourites she brought online. A cute, pink dildo that reminded her of you.

It's just too precious.

"spit on it" she muttered, watching as you did as she ordered, once she was pleased enough, Wanda's hands came up to your head, you eagerly wrapped your mouth over her fake dick, she groaned.

"good girl, sucking my cock so well" she moaned. "God, you're my personal fucktoy, aren't you?, my flesh light, you like that, don't you?."

She heard you whimper, causing her to smirk.

"do a good enough job and maybe I'll reward you with something else."

#wanda x reader #wanda x you #wanda x y/n #emo!wanda #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff smut #stuff i wrote

[russellsppttemplates]

https://www.tumblr.com/goldenboygate/748927575652515840?source=share

How about a blurb of happy tipsy/drunk Lando and reader on the boat and he's extra clingy and saying sweet funny things? Bonus points if she's caring for his bloody nose and he's looking at her with the gloomy sparkly eyes (we have all seen the pictures 👀🫣)

Note: the more content I see from this day, the more I think this is going in the books 😅

Cw: mentions a cut, blood, alcohol consumption

"Fill mine, please!", Lando asked one of the guys as he filled his own cup with some orange drink right on theme for the day.

When you said you'd join the celebrations for King's Day, Lando and Martin were the most excited for it and promised you one hell of a party indeed.

"Show me how you dance with your pretty hips! Baby, are my moves as good as yours?", Lando said as he swayed his hips from side to side, his knees helping him bounce slightly as he waved the cup around. The sunglasses didn't cover his blushed cheeks and big smile, but you were sure they were hiding your favourite pair of eyes, now probably squinty and glassy as he sang loudly.

"Yes, Lan, they're good", you shook your head as you laughed, letting him pull you closer to him so he could dance with you.

"My chest is full of love for you, baby", Lando whispered on your ear before he nipped at the skin there.

"We're out, Lando, there's other people here", you gasped even though you were enjoying his touches a little too much. Drunk Lando often meant an even clingier boyfriend.

"I don't care, I'm full of love for you - I love you!", he stated kissing your lips and everywhere on your face he could.

You turned around for a couple of minutes, approaching the edge so you could get a little bit of air and look at how everyone else was celebrating the day until you heard a gasp followed by Martin calling your name.

"What?", you asked before seeing Lando and his bloody nose, "Oh my word", you whispered as you approached him.

"We clicked the glasses and then this happened", Martin explained as you took a good look at the injury.

Even though it seemed like a little nick on the skin from the glass, it was bleeding a good amount, "Here's the first aid kit", someone said as they handed it to you.

"Does it hurt a lot, love?", you asked Lando as you rummaged through the bag to figure out what you had and what you could do with it.

"It's okay", he mumbled.

"Hold this, Lando, I need to find something to disinfect- we're in a boat full of alcohol drinks but medical grade stuff would be better I guess", you mumbled the last part, trying to read the label of the bottle and smelling them.

Once you look up after finding the rubbing alcohol and some cotton buds and pads, you see the gauze wrapped around his head, "like this, right, lovie?", Lando smiled, a genuine tinge of hope in his voice at helping you help him.

"Not quite", you laughed. You felt bad for doing so while he was clearly hurt despite not hearing many complaints from him.

"Let me put some steri strips - stay still, Lan, I need to see this upclose", you stated after cleaning the cut, applying the strips in a cross since you could see the skin was pulling both ways.

"Did you do it like an X? I felt that", Lando spoke, "X marks the spot for the treasure, doesn't it? I'm your treasure!", he cheered, "Taylor Swift says that it marks the spot where we fell apart, but we never fall apart baby, we're forever".

"You are, Lan, my biggest treasure", you smiled, "can you stay still for a bit longer though, please?", you asked gently still.

Lando complied with your request, staying still as you did your best to make sure the dressing was helping or at least not making the situation worse, "Is this your way of telling me you want me to get a rhinoplasty? Funny, it has rhino in it", he giggled before he attempted to make an elephant noise.

"No, baby, I love your nose just the way it is", you smiled, kissing the tip of his nose when you were happy with the improvised wound dressing, "there, all done! You even get a magic kiss for it to heal faster!".

"You're so pretty, you're really my girlfriend? Ah! Would you look at that, Martin? She's my girlfriend - I'm one lucky dude", Lando beamed at his friend before he kissed your lips, letting you sit on the edge of the boat, "you can sit there, baby, it's got railing to protect you from falling in the water - it's looks mucky", he made a disgusted face.

You sat there, glad to be able to experience these moments with your boyfriend and seeing his so carefree and happy. His PR team would maybe have to do some cleaning up, but at the end of the day, he was a happy young man enjoying his time off and he had the right to enjoy it.

"She is my girlfriend - Look, Y/N! Someone is recording us, say hi, my love!", he yelled, getting you to wave at a girl filming on another boat, "isn't she pretty? And she fixed my nose too!".

(Thank you for sending this in ✨️)

#lando norris blurb #inês writes blurbs #f1 blurb #f1 x reader

[comradekatara]

Can you go a bit more in depth about your post about Sokka in the Burning Rock episode? You said that it was basically his suicide mission, which I agree with. I'd really like to hear more of your thoughts on it.

okay yeah i mean i'm sure i've covered all these points before extensively because i love weaving a tapestry of sokka's fucked up psychological landscape more than anything in the world, but every so often someone will comment on one of my posts and be like "i think you're reaching i think sokka is the paragon of mental health actually" and i'm just like um. did we not all watch the boiling rock. did we just ignore the apotheosis of sokka's entire character arc. like katara's apotheosis in "the southern raiders" is both very overt and impactful and also, arguably, subtler than sokka's, because they don't explicitly spell out the themes every five seconds, but like. if you didn't watch the boiling rock then you cannot understand sokka. and weirdly enough i also believe that zuka shippers are the biggest culprit of this despite this episode being thee zucchini episode because they somehow still have the audacity to characterize sokka as "goofy sunshine who exists to comfort zuko" when like. the entire point is that sokka is legitimately suicidal here and zuko is doing everything in his power to support him thru what is quite literally a mental breakdown. like their relationship is legitimately interesting i don't understand how people have taken that and made it deeply boring.....but i digress.

the boiling rock is quite obviously sokka at his lowest. the worst thing that could ever happen to him – fumbling a mission that was squarely his responsibility, from its conception to its execution, due to not being able to sufficiently compartmentalize his emotions, leading to the mass imprisonment of most of his comrades, including the men of his tribe whom he idolized his entire life and felt immense pressure to live up to, including his father who he is deathly afraid of disappointing (for reasons that have nothing to hakoda being malicious or neglectful in any way, fwiw), and thus being directly implicated in the failure and the harm caused by said failure – happened. sokka is someone who is especially bad at dealing with failure, because a) he is exceptionally talented, and thus has less experience dealing with failure in both minor and major ways, and thus lacks the emotional resilience developed through the process of struggle and growth that normal people (such as, incidentally, zuko) go through and b) to sokka, whose primary desire at all times is to protect and provide for others in any way he possibly can, for someone else to sacrifice themselves for him constitutes a fundamental disruption to the order. there is a perverse wrongness to kya or yue or hakoda or suki making sacrifices on their own volition, because it means that sokka has existentially failed to protect them by martyring himself. like, he somehow feels so guilty about suki being imprisoned that when azula reveals this piece of information to him, it literally distracts him from his own mission. and mind you, there's absolutely no way sokka could have known or been responsible for suki's imprisonment. but he still feels guilty nonetheless. and azula knows that, knows exactly how to twist the knife to make him break, because, well, it's honestly pretty obvious.

sokka obviously cannot retroactively save his mother or his first girlfriend, but he can save his father and his current girlfriend. in "the awakening" aang says he has to restore his honor after the guilt and shame of his failure in ba sing se (aang is also an incurable gifted kid perfectionist, btw, as is azula. posts for another time...) and sokka repeats zuko's line again in this episode, after experiencing the guilt and shame of his failure during the eclipse. the driving motivation of zuko's entire character, feeling like he has failed in some ontological way and must therefore redeem himself or die trying, is reinforced through aang and sokka's respective experiences mirroring that drive. aang goes out in a storm and nearly drowns to redeem himself in some vague, nebulous way, because he isn't thinking rationally. and likewise sokka, who usually always has a plan and always thinks things through, feels that caution and foresight is pointless, because he came up with a genuinely brilliant invasion plan and it didn't work, so clearly there's something wrong with him (just as he always suspected) and no amount of planning even matters, because he's a capital F Failure and always will be. and so he vows to save his father, as he promised him he would when they parted on the day of black sun, or die trying, because if he can't even do that then what is he good for; at least he'll die a martyr, which to him, is basically his ideal situation. because to sokka, dying as a martyr is basically the highest form of fulfilling his purpose (being needed, protecting people) and so if he dies a martyr, then maybe his catastrophic failure (that is entirely his fault and rests squarely on his shoulders btw) can be forgiven. so his plan is basically just to sacrifice himself for his father so that he can die "redeemed." very normal, rational, healthy behavior, i would say.

sidenote, i also see people claim that "the boiling rock" makes sokka look stupid because why wouldn't he take any of the insanely talented benders to a prison in a giant volcano surrounded by a boiling lake, and it's like. sokka literally admits that he's not being rational, that he doesn't think he's going to survive this, that this is not a good idea. it would go against sokka's entire modus operandi if he brought the children who he feels a deep, presiding responsibility to protect on a suicide mission that he's lowkey hoping will fail (because he not so secretly loves courting death. it's like she's the moon or something). he only lets zuko come with him because he doesn't actually care whether zuko lives or dies at this point. sokka has absolutely no faith in zuko whatsoever (and frankly, why would he, zuko has yet to actually prove himself to him. he didn't even kill combustion man; sokka did) so he has no idea that zuko is actually going to be helpful and supportive in a meaningful way. and frankly, if he had known that at the beginning, or even remotely liked zuko as a person, he probably wouldn't have caved so easily when zuko invited himself to join. if he didn't think that zuko was objectively worse than him and basically worthless as a human being, i doubt he would have let himself be so vulnerable with zuko in the first place. meanwhile zuko is eating it up bc he's like "omg he's confiding in me he's letting me help him we're basically besties" because he doesn't actually know sokka well enough to realize that sokka doesn't actually do that shit with people he remotely respects. shit like "my first girlfriend turned into the moon" and "i had a feeling this was going to be a one way trip" are simply not things that sokka would say out loud 98% of the time. the fact that he is admitting something real is not a testament to the trust he places in zuko, but rather the opposite. sokka spilling his guts (you know, for him) to his resident collateral damage, sokka bringing his lovingly crafted space sword on this mission, sokka not even confirming whether or not his father is actually there beforehand – he's simply stopped giving a fuck, he doesn't care whether or not he lives to see another day, because to him, he has nothing left to lose.

but of course, that also isn't true at all. i mean, for one thing, zuko still needs to teach aang firebending, so he does serve a pretty important function to the group, and zuko simply telling him to do hot squats in his absence does not qualify as significant tutelage. but also, even more importantly, sokka is integral to the fabric of the group. when he's gone for a day in "sokka's master" they literally all just shut down and start complaining about how much they miss him (we don't actually see any b-roll of the gaang hanging around the western air temple because the episode is simply too busy for that, so who can say whether the same thing occurs twice). sokka cannot afford to simply die just because his first plan failed, he still has a major responsibility to his friends. fucking idiot. i've said before that sokka has the emotional resilience of like. a pathetic wet newborn kitten caught in the rain. but like, come on man. i mean, as someone who has also suffered from debilitating perfectionist issues and never had to be responsible for a failed military invasion that cost my people their freedom, i do get it, but still. not his best moment. although there is something genuinely admirable about the fact that after he finds suki, he decides that saving suki is enough, and genuinely does want to succeed in his mission going forward. like his love for suki is one of the only things that consistently makes him happy and makes him forget that his greatest dream in life is to be murdered, and that's so beautiful to me.

the entire point of this episode, by the way, is that sokka is wrong. if that isn't obvious. sokka's entire worldview, that he only has value insofar as he exists to provide for others, and if he fails to protect people in any capacity, he has fundamentally failed to uphold the one reason he even exists on this earth, and thus he does not deserve to exist unless he is bearing the weight of everyone's suffering or otherwise proving his worth through sacrificing himself for others, is um. fucking stupid???? and incorrect. and stupid. the thing is, unlike zuko, sokka can't really point to any one person who taught him to see himself this way. he can't just face his father and tell him that his abuse was cruel and wrong, because hakoda is a good father who has never not supported and believed in and encouraged him, done everything in his power to protect him, loved him unconditionally. hakoda has inadvertently damaged sokka's psyche in various ways, of course, but never with any intention to hurt him. like, ozai tried to kill zuko, on multiple occasions. it's a pretty obvious indicator of the primary source of harm in his life. but sokka is equally if not more Unwell, and there's no one single figure he can blame, because his complex lies within a tangled web of what my best friend fanon calls the "massive psychoexistential complex" of the colonized subject. he is being dehumanized not through interpersonal abuse, but through the violent logic of imperialism. sokka's formative traumas inform his psychology as he understands that he only has value insofar as he is protecting the people he loves (namely his sister) from being murdered by imperialists, much like his mother did. and that logic is continually reified through the violence he is being subjected to, until he truly absorbs the belief that his life has no value on its own, that he is genuinely Less than [human] in some fundamental way. which is obviously deeply tragic, but also lowkey kind of comical because he also happens to be the specialest boy in the world, who literally did come up with multiple working escape plans at the world's most secure supermax on the fly, mind you! but whenever anyone tries to point that out, including piandao literally saying "you're the most exceptional and worthy person i've ever met in my life" sokka is just like "um. that is incorrect actually." like NO ONE should depersonalize themselves and feel that their only value lies in their ability to serve and sacrifice themselves for others, but it's especially ironic that sokka literally does not think he has any value as a human being, and yet he is also objectively exceptional. like, do you understand why i adore this character so much. do you.

anyway. the point of this episode isn't that sokka has worth because he's exceptional, either. that's lowkey the point of "sokka's master," but also a) sokka doesn't really internalize it and b) the more important part of the episode lies in how much the gaang just misses his company because they miss their neurotic control freak big brother who makes bad jokes. but even if he couldn't come up with multiple working escape plans on the fly, suki and zuko still stay by his side anyway because they care about him. they are demonstrating that they would risk their safety and possibly even their lives, in the exact way that sokka is always trying to for everyone else, for him. that sokka doesn't need to be the one who always protects everyone else, and that he isn't a failure for letting people who care about him help him and protect him. and sokka has to accept their help, because suki and zuko are simply too stubborn not to force him into letting them support him. they are standing in a literal maximum security prison in the middle of a volcano and they are still choosing to prioritize sokka's mental health and wellbeing, which is honestly crazy, but also exactly what he needs in this moment. suki has known sokka for what, 3 days maximum? yes they're soulmates but like, girl get up. and in zuko's case, "girl get up" is magnified tenfold, because he literally risked his life to go with him to the boiling rock (also largely motivated by the guilt of not being able to stage his own prison break with iroh, but still!) and let himself get imprisoned despite being the fire nation's most wanted criminal, stayed by sokka's side no matter what including getting thrown into a literal torture chamber for him, jumped across a gaping boiling chasm with no guarantee that he'd survive except for the implicit expectation that sokka would catch him on the other side. like zuko is so fucking pussywhipped and sokka didn't even value him as a human being until like halfway through their entire mission. insane.

in conclusion: "the boiling rock" is a beautiful story of the most mentally ill boy on the planet (he took first place ever since jet died rip jet forever in our hearts), and his two ride or die bitches who he met like yesterday, and also his dad, and a casual homophobe named chit sang, all working together to demonstrate to him why killing yourself is a bad idea in most cases, probably. it's also the story of the most insane dyke drama of all time, but that's for another post (of which i have of course made multiple, most recently, here). i said it's the apotheosis of sokka's arc, and by that i mean it's the most overt acknowledgement of what his fundamental issue is, and the first steps one must take in actually resolving it (namely, accepting help and support from your peers and loved ones). do i think that sokka is magically cured after returning from the boiling rock? no, probably not (in fact, because i'm somewhat sick & twisted myself, i like to imagine that once the war ends, he actually gets worse). but he does seem genuinely happier after they return. and maybe that's just bc kyoshi warrior pussy hits different, but like. he was able to rely on others for help (including mai my best friend mai) who supported him unconditionally and prevented him from simply giving up, and that's so incredibly important. that kind of support is always important, to everyone, of course, but as we've established, it's especially important to sokka specifically, at his lowest (quite possibly ever), in this situation. no one has an obligation to risk their life for someone else, but sokka is something who thinks that his purpose is to risk his life for other people (namely katara), and so for people who really have nothing to gain and everything to lose in standing by and promising not to leave without him, to actually show that they support him unconditionally is huge. if sokka has no fans then i am dead and so is suki zuko hakoda toph aang piandao iroh the mechanist etc etc etc. perfect episode <3

#suicide / #writergracethepanda #asks #analysis #sokka #sokkaxsuki #cinematic masterpiece the boiling rock part 2 #(technically i use that tag to talk about maizulee but swagever) #this post is basically just stream of consciousness unstructured rambling so i hope you find it valuable in some way... #at this point i've given up on trying to do Readings of and make Arguments about sokka #and i'm just rambling. i posted a whole fucking. ACTUAL essay about him yesterday and no one read it #but this is not that. this is. who even knows. it's certainly not an ''essay'' #my thesis statement: i love sokka so much #my body paragraphs: hes a weak willed mentally ill fucking IDIOT #just trust me ok. trust the process

[dairy-farmer]

Sneaking back iiiin~☆ After a period of being away o/

D-Lister Otome Powers POG? I think SO! CONSIDER:

Tim, out on patrol, things have been... tense. He's gotten Bruce back from the timeline, but it hasn't FIXED anything. Things were said. He spiraled. Trust was betrayed. He doesn't... he doesn't feel like he HAS a home anymore.

Dick feels betrayed and worried TOO. He needed Tim's support. Instead he broke down, went rouge, and nearly DIED. Didn't explain ANYTHING. Now he's drifting away from the family.

Bruce is barely recovered. His family is in pieces around him and he's pretty sure it's his fault.

So... Patrol is... Professional. Tense. Like it has been for days.

Red Robin is checking out some minor disturbance. Discovers clues that it's some INCREDIBLY naive or foolish out-of-towner who thinks they can "make a name for themselves" in America's crime capital. Idiot is going to get himself killed.

But why target a minor gaming company?

No matter, RR can handle it. He's tired, patrols nearly over. Should be quick.

The days after weeks of hurt and hypertense emotions have left him exhausted. Making mistakes he would normally NEVER make. Like going after an unknown alone. No matter how small they SEEM.

You could always be wrong.

And that KILLS.

Batman trained him better then that. Bruce, catches his plan, too late. Is blocks away. Can hear, through Tim's comms, the most terrifying sort of confidence in that opponents voice. Not fool hardy overconfidence. Not arrogance. But "I have a nasty trick that I KNOW you can't counter". Tim. Tim, get out of there! TIM!

Red Robin does not respond.

And Tim? Wakes up with a splitting headache. Too... honestly? What looks A LOT frilly, hyper feminine version of one of Drake Manor's guest rooms. But with "personal touches" added to make it LOOK like someone supposedly lives here. Too generic though. And too artfully placed. It looks like a movie set.

Where the fuck is h-*DING!*

Then a blue screen like some of the holographic screens he's seen before, pops up. "Welcome to ☆~Knights In Gotham~☆! Complete the game or be trapped forever~♡!" It reads in cutesy font.

Well that ONE way to get him out of bed. But unfortunately, it takes less then 15 minutes to confirm that he is, indeed, not in his native reality. MIGHT be drugged or hypnotized. He'll have to test. But the whole new reproductive set, suggest otherwise.

So he pokes around. Speed runs his emotional "I'm trapped, might never see my family again. No. No! I WILL escape!" Character arc/mental breakdown in the shower. Finds some pants.

Figures out what sort of game this is. It's an Otome game. Dating. Based on? His FAMILY. Fffffuck his life.

Okay, should be TOO bad right? People never get their personalities right in fan stuff. Thanks to the Bats being Cryptids. So Tim can just pretend they're other people, right?

Wrong.

The game world he quickly realizes, is using HIS knowledge to fill in the blanks of the massively unfinished framework. This assholes Meta powers? Can only trap him IN here. He's not in control of it. NO ONE IS. Oh, that's so much worse.

Outside? Bruce has BatDad'd panic beat downed the Otome Meta. Where is his BABY BOY!? He can't answer you unconscious, Bruce. Thankfully, Dick is observant. There us a computer on. With Tim on it. He puts two and two together. They are able to keep the power on and transfer the computer to the cave.

Meanwhile? Tim is staring down a Bruce in FULL Brucie Mask. Debating with himself. Because on ONE hand? Childhood wet dreams: Get? But on the OTHER, baggage for daaaaays. And there us no guarantee this isn't a PG title. So like? Bruce would DEFINITELY be the hardest Route, wouldn't he?

He has no idea what he's doing.

He doesn't PLAY these type of games.

He figures, since demon child DOESNT have a reason to hate him here? Probably the safest bet. Especially since he won't feel as bad manipulating a version of him. It should be fine right?

Wrong. He doesn't play these sort of games. Is unaware of how they work and what's at stake. He bungles it. Doesn't play to the troupes, gets his first Bad End. He knew just a touch TOO much, too soon, too openly. Damian's character became convinced he was either a Rouge or an Assassin. But! He got all those "heart event" thingies! Tim mentally protests!

Which is why it doesn't just cut to black, a sudden attack from behind, "Game Over".

No, Tim wakes up behind bars. In a bunker. Nicer then a prison cell, but only just. Because Damian LOVES him. But can not allow him to continue his criminal ways. So he's going to rehabilitate him. By force if necessary. And he knows, because he is not a fool, that Tim does not truely love him. But?

He can fix that too.

They have time.

Outside? Actual Damian is horrified. His feelings towards Drake are... complexe. But this?! Absolutely not! He lunges forward. Dick is trying desperately to hit the Restart. It's not working. Damian hits it HARDER. It works immediately. (They later realize only the "Route" target can restart the game)

Tim wakes up in the starting room.

This time he fuckin LOOKS UP Otome Games on a computer.

Takes a bracing shot of whiskey, because this IS Drake Manor and he knows where his parents hid the good stuff, and tries again. Gets the Neutral End. Fuck! Okay, tries AGAIN. Gets shot, Game Over. Oh god damn it!

He keeps going.

Nothing seems to be WORKING. He's getting stressed. Lonely, desperate, hopelessness trying to set in. He just... just wants to feel WARM you know? Reassured. Held. Knows he's not thinking clearly, but...

So he goes after "Brucie". He KNOWS Bruce. Knows how he picks his one night stands. Knows how to dress up just enough, just OFF enough, to not be suspicious. It's a bad idea. He knows it as he gets dressed. As he arrives. Flirts. Charms and drinks, but not too much. Let's himself be tucked under Bruce's arm. Led away.

Kon always said he was great with his mouth. From the way "Brucie" tenses, like iron under the sild of his suit, holding himself back from grabbing and being rougher then his reputation would allow? He'd say Bruce agrees. Tim certainly puts his all into it. Let's himself lose himself to the rhythm of movement. The scent of Bruce's cologne. The slide over his tounge.

Stolen moments though, aren't enough to get to everything Bruce wants.

The party ends too soon. And Tim leaves with the other guests.

Only to find himself FIRMLY in Bruce's route. The man showing up everywhere. Stealing kisses. Hands disappearing under clothes. Bruce, as he tends too, obsessed. In love. Overwhelming. Tim finally, FINALLY get a Good End.

He also gets fucked, in his bed, within an inch of incoherence, by Batman.

Yet the Game does not release him. Because it did not say "complete A Route" the realse conditions were Complete the GAME. So now Tim has to "win" the others.

All while they watch.

Because THEY are the only ones who can start a new route. Bruce absolutely could have hit that restart once the Good End popped up. Yet... he let the scene play out. Sat, alone, having sent the others to bed... and watched his son get fucked by a version of himself. Watched his son gasp and whimper, cry out and sob, in pleasure.

They each get to watch. As Tim bonds with "them". Spends time with "them".

Eventually, Tim manages the secret Harem Ending. Stumbles free into the waiting arms of his family. They rejoince. But the question remains~! What will they do know? After so long, thinking darkly that they could "do better"? That TIM deserved better then the touch of imposters? That is the question we ask! As I run out of steam and need to sleep! Thoughts?

-🐼🐼🐼

tim's family watching as he works through all their "routes" 👀👀👀👀

#answered asks #asks #anonymous

[chifuyusun]

Negai no Astro Chapter 3: Some Thoughts

Another banger by Wakui. I'm enjoying this story and its characters a lot so far! Wakui always knows how to move me with his complex family plotlines and drama🥹Excited to see what's to come, and also afraid for the siblings and the angst that I'm certain Wakui is cooking, I mean we already saw a glimpse of it. It was resolved quickly though, yay (for now)

The family all look so tiny and cute aw🥰I really want to see more of their past before the rebellion started, them growing up together, bonding, just soft moments..I feel like Wakui will bring these forward during fights or deaths..we saw him do that a lot in Tokyo Revengers, to pour salt on the wound 😭 Anyway, we have the number of most of the siblings so far except the 4th, 6th and 7th adopted, and as far as we know they are 12, I believe one was shown this chapter but not given a number yet, and it is 12 adopted siblings and Hibaru if I am not wrong, I have a feeling the cute girl from the promo pictures is not related to them, but to the astro power. I would like to meet some characters outside the family, I love the concept a lot as someone who has enjoyed such stories, but I wanna see some friendships etc. like in TR, Wakui knows how to write such bonds so well🥹

+ Still no news of her..no name, no info, Wakui please..🙏🏻😔

He's like the little "I choose violence" “peace was never an option” duck meme😭 but damn, seeing a different side to Terasu this chapter sure was interesting..he can be pretty cold-hearted, unlike his angel of a brother..but they complement each other, as one of the TR quotes that I love dearly: "he compensates for what he's lacking."

While I stand with Hibaru on this, I need to know more about Terasu and his relationship with the siblings aside Hibaru because he does not seem to have any bit of a soft spot for them, and I wonder why. I mean, he went to the extreme immediately, but we also saw that Shio wants them dead, and who knows what else he witnessed the siblings do when Hibaru was in his coma. He definitely just wants to protect himself and Hibaru from Shio and the rest who wish them harm or want them eliminated out of the picture, but I did not like the "we're not blood related we might as well be strangers"..I understand his frustration, but adopted family is a family, and found family is a family..reminds me of the conversation between Shinichiro and Izana, when Izana insisted that blood means everything, and Shinichiro said blood does not matter, they are still family, be it adopted, or the family you choose..but also if your family wants you dead, it is a complicated situation in a dog eat dog world, as Terasu said, it's kill or be killed. I wonder what Hibaru will do when forced to face such a situation, cause surely the power of love and friendship wont stop Shio and the rest

Hibaru and Terasu's fight was fun to read;not fun emotionally was gonna cry if they did not resolve it but like, seeing Wakui's fight scenes again, I love it + I knew Terasu's astro power is a shield, I mean it was quite obvious since he survived a whole building crashing on him, but nice to see it confirmed lol. + so they are shield and strength, interesting dynamic.

Angel mc with a heart of gold🩷every chapter I love him more and more, I'll give him the world and keep him in my pocket🥹 I am afraid of him though, "never be so kind you forget to be clever", I hope he knows the limits of love to give those who wish him harm. but it warms my heart, how he says he loves Shio and everyone..my sweet boy, please don't hurt him Wakui..i hope some of the siblings will be on his side. I also love how his purity and kind soul reflected on Terasu and were able to turn things around and end the fight. I'm starting to doubt that Terasu would betray him (mentioning this cause I wrote before some hints that he could be a Judas kind of character later) I love angst, but I hope to not see them fight again. Also the way he sobs and calls him "jerkface" because he was so hurt that the family was called strangers..adorable precious sweet boy🫶🏻

Angry kitty😠

Hibaru is so cute and Terasu is like "free me I don't wanna be here"😭

grandpa is so funny the way he's here for the tea and encouraging the fight , I hope to keep seeing more of him

I finally know pretty boy's name! Shikaba! and the other brother is Taira, interesting to see they are presented together in both their appearances. they don't seem too mean like the other brothers. Taira so far seems like a Hanma type of character who comments about everything and enjoys the vibes lol. As for Shikaba, interesting to see his eyes are still closed 🤔

aaand him, Kuran, he sure is intriguing, as Hibaru referred to him as "a real man among men", and it shows he truly admires him and his strength. he's been quiet so far in all his appearances, but does not seem too friendly, we shall see

that's all, I adore Hibaru and Terasu sm🫶🏻

#anime and manga #negai no astro #ken wakui #manga #astro royale #astro royale manga #negai no astro manga #tokyo revengers #tokrev #hibaru #hibaru yotsurugi #hibaru negai no astro #terasu #terasu yotsurugi #terasu negai no astro #shio negai no astro #shio yotsurugi #shikaba yotsurugi #taira yotsurugi #wakui please don’t hurt terasu #i love this manga sm already

[prince-liest]

Thank you for answering my ask and sorry for sending you a new one so quickly, but I just have a lot of Thoughts(tm) about this au!!!

So I keep going back to reread the first chapter, both in its entirety and just specific bits that I like, and I keep noticing how.... polite? Alastor is being? And it's just totally throwing me off lol.

Like, I actually read the snippet you posted of Vox offering Alastor's new shoes before I realized/read the first chapter, and thought it was a little odd how nice Alastor was being, as at that point I thought it was a snippet of a new 666 chapter.

But Alastor being polite in this universe totally makes sense!! He's just been beat up in an alley way, watched two guys get killed in front of him, was (kidnapped) taken to his "savior's" room, and hypnotized by said savior.

Of COURSE he's going to be polite to Vox!! Vox can electrocute and hypnotize people!! Alastor isn't an idoit, he knows he's in hell with a very dangerous person. That he's in a room with someone with someone more powerful than he is, that if Vox did get annoyed or angry at him, and hurt him, Alastor doesn't have that great of odds fighting back, and it's not like someone else is going to pop out and save him.

He's being careful.

But, he doesn't want to be taken advantage of. He knows that if acts like helpless prey, then he's going to be treated like it. So he has to establish that Vox sees him as an equal, or else he risks Vox hurting or hypnotizing him if Vox wanted to.

There's also another thing I noticed- Alastor's.... animalistic (if that is the right word) tendencies. Like, Alastor attacked both Vel and Vox, but didn't use the knife he was on either of them. I think this really interesting, as it would be smarter to use the knife (it's like Vox doesn't know he has it) but by using his teeth and his hands to hurt, it showcases Alastor's new animalistic tendencies. Though I don't know if this was On Purpose, or if it's just a theory lol.

Anyway, I just wanted a chance to talk more about this fic because im really, REALLY enjoying it, and I can't wait for me! (But I can! So don't feel the need to rush! You've already written so much! Take your time!)

One LAST ASK, I promise you (🤞 but probably not lol, sorry) so I'm pretty sure you hinting that Alastor killed someone and was burying their body before being killed himself (like in canon), but what caught my attention is that VOX doesn't seem to know this?? Like he doesn't know that Alastor has killed people?? Which makes sense, it's not common knowledge. But!! Vox has already established that he knows more about Alastor than the general public would, like he knows more about his relationship with his dad (maybe Vox hunted down Alastor's dad and forced him to spill info regarding Alastor, which is hilarious to think about lol). So I'm just SO EXCITED for when it's revealed that Alastor also killed people in life, and for Vox to no doubt get so hard he passes out lol. Also, this means that Vox doesn't know that Alastor is a cannibal, which is also really interesting! (Also, I'm not sure if you were hunting at Alastor's cannibalistic tendencies when he won't let go of Vel with his teeth, but it is a funny mental image to me of Alastor just, trying to eat Vel because a new part of himself is starving for flesh.)

But I do fucking love it. Ehehehehe. These are the EXACT things that I was hoping the first chapter would get people thinking about. I just. GESTURES WILDLY. THERE'S SO MUCH, IN WHAT YOU SAID. SO MUCH. But I can't say shit about it one way or the other for fear of spoilers. Just know that I love you for this.

Actually the one thing I can confirm is that Vox indeed is not under any impression that Alastor is anything more than just, like, a really talented storyteller and true crime podcaster!

#ask #personal #amanda-519 #t #my writing #once bitten back for more #hazbin hotel #long post #...I can probably also confirm what Vox's reaction would be to finding out something like that LMAO #there's 2.5 sex scenes in this outline and all of them happen after Alastor does something violent and deranged

[bloo-the-dragon]

Why did Solar have to die permanently while Eclipse gets to keep coming back over and over like freaking Megatron!?

anon you stirred an ancient ghost inside me with mention of megatron lmao /silly

but anyways - i think it became a running theme that Eclipse was gonna keep coming back like peepaw. But this time however there has been a big shift in his character, so the coming back from death thing has ultimately had a greater effect this time around than the last.

For starters, it's already been confirmed he is not really Eclipse. At least not the prior incarnations. He's a mimicry a different entity who carries only the fractured memories and directives of the ones who came before. The only thing that even really connects him to the Eclipse character beyond that is the fact his code was made from Solar's (who is also an Eclipse)

He is very much like Eclipse in personality for sure, unhinged and a complete asshole. But his unique circumstance, being brought so low that he truly is an inferior Eclipse, a false copy, and the fact he knows this has greatly altered his view on himself and his goals. He can say how he's superior to everyone all he wants but 1. no one cares anymore and 2. he knows it's a lie anyways.

But with Earth showing him genuine kindness and patience lately combined with the aforementiond, this has finally allowed him to actually open up a bit and maybe just maybe allow that sliver of a chance for redemption/to find a new purpose in life, even if that is away from the plex. I don't expect him to suddenly turn into a nice eclipse like Solar, in fact i would very much prefer for him to continue being a little asshole rat bastard /aff - but i do want him to be free of his past and find a new purpose, a new reason to live that isn't just antagonising others and hungering for power.

But i'm getting off track here-

We don't actually know if Solar will be dead permanently. It's been said already there is a way to bring him back but it would require sacrificing someone else, and not only that but their entire existence. My moneys on it being the creator ngl because as it stands he is pretty much unkillable. Using him as that sacrifice would be effective in removing him entirely but the only problem would be actually being able to go through with the plan because the brain's a tricky guy to pin down (plus i don't doubt Earth would be conflicted about it)

#questions and answers #Anon #sun and moon show #sams eclipse #sams solar #i have yet to watch the recent episode with earth and eclipse becoming friends (as the title says) #but! i do believe Earth will be key to Eclipse finally getting that redemption we've wanted for so long lmao #and as for Solar i do think he will be coming back but there will be a great cost to it #but again i'm of the belief the creator will be that sacrifice used #because it does make narrative sense #(then again the shows writing makes me have a bit of doubt there ngl gjfklgh) #but the only issue is again actually making him that sacrifice #because it ain't gonna be easy #also im writing this while recovering from fatigue so apologies if it doesnt make complete sense in some areas fjdg

[seelestia]

who are a few mutuals that you appreciate alot? mutual appreciation day 🥰❤️😊🤩💐✨

OOOO FUNFUNFUN!!! thank u so much for sending this in and for essentially spreading positivity, nonnie. this is appreciated ♡ also, instead of strictly moots, i decided to extend my appreciation to everyone! moots, anons, friends and readers alike ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა

some odeliaesqué sappy appreciation under the cut:

@yvnaology - one of my fav facts abt yona was that she's one of the first moots i ever had on tumblr!!! and she's a lyney kisser and a fellow aventurine kisser (#taste). also she's so silly (/aff) and easy to talk to! like u'll feel at ease around her. she deserves good great and awesome things in life, so make sure to water ur yona daily with love <3

@solarisfortuneia - mika wished me congrats when i reached 1k and i still remember it till this day <3 she's friendly in a shy/modest way and suchsuchsuch a good writer! e.g. i cry over this every day actually. mika also has her silly moments sometimes too. someone save her /j

@floraldresvi - simply the sweetest & most supportive moot EVER! vivi is full of love and she's good at giving some of that love to others <3 her selfships are like bottles of serotonin to me. 100% would drop anything and everything in my hands to support her!!! and ik she'd do the same for me <3 mwah mwah 💐💐

@monicahar - the moot who comes online once in a while and drops absolute meals when she does. ate, left no crumbs 🔥🔥 also SUPER FUNNY!!! and unhinged, i'm concerned but amused at the same time. i hope she's having a nice break!! thank u for ur past & future services ma'am. we love u 🤭🤭

@milk-violet - MIREI !!! sunshine personified but also vv precious. i'm the leader of # protecc mirei squad (real). best person to have ever appeared in my notifs and i lovelovelove when her username pops up. take care & good luck with school! IK U CAN DO IT. remember what i said: slay before ur slayed 🗣️

@xianyoon - the butterfly moot 🦋 !!! both socially and aesthetically hehe. sosooso sweet & kind. has creative projects and executes them well at that too. i personally crown her as genshinblr's best hostess™! also, send her a moodboard and she'll cherish u forever - that's one of her love languages <3 ++ her pretty & aesthetic rb's are such a good refresh for my dash. love her for it!!

@hermosacolibri - the name, 'starlight' fits them sm bcs i feel like if we were to take a peek into their mind, stars will burst out!!! /pos (<- unique complimenting skills ik pardon me). their ideas are brilliant and i can tell they put their all into pursuing their vision <3 it's truly an honor to be a witness & reader. if u want to check them out, they write over at @/starlightlacrimosazpsff !!! ★

@wolfhookk - aaaaa ri !!!! booping her x1000 rn bcs i cannot believe boop trend ended when she came online. the discrimination 😔 /j i'll always remember ri as my first ever moot on here like first, 1st, #1!!! i forever thank her for swooping into my inbox back then and she's welcome to do that even now any time she likes <3

@kaiserkisser - skylia is the true angst consumer, the realest of it!! even in different fandoms LOL. she's nice (and gremlin-ish) when u get to know her more and she reciprocates energy really well! i'll never forget the disaster of boops in my notifs /lh

@callilouv - COOL MUTUAL ALERT !!!! cool art & cool interests. truly, picasso w/ the finger and fandoms!! idk if cal still draws with his finger dhjahshsj but still vv mega cool!

@manager-of-the-pudding-bank - the grandpas & old men kisser where art thou 💔 /j loqua has that awkward & silly rizz!!! idk if she still does wax stamps but i still think it's really cool. bcs qua's just cool in general !!! hehe

@calxlu - aaaaa vi!!! the one who enables my rambles and selfships shhshsh i am so thankful <3 rambler 🤝 rambler is the best. i love talking to her and it's super reassuring to know that it's mutual! even if i take some time but i always look forward to seeing her replies in my inbox. it's like we're penpals across the screen talking abt irl stuff and our f/o's ꒰✿´ ꒳ ` ꒱♡

& honorable mention: @/zhongrin. rin does not interact with minors anymore (which i respect and so should everyone!), so we count as former moots. but !!! i still think she's an amazing person regardless <3 (note: her blog is equally as great but plsplspls be mindful of her rules beforehand.)

brainrot anon - A REAL ONE!!! always there when i come back from the grave each time. i get reminded of them whenever i look at my inbox, it's an instinct atp. their brainrots are so fun & random (but that's a charm in itself /pos) !!! tbh i love elaborating them all so never stop sending the brainworms in <3 feel free to treat my inbox as a drop-off for ur thoughts LMAO /gen. come by again soon!

michiki anon - MY COUSINNNMNMN!!! i still love and miss when they'd come into my inbox to chat. it was so nice getting to know someone in a casual way <3 i hope ur doing well wherever u are, michikinon! i'm doing well these days and i hope u are too 🤍

rix anon - their series still has me FLOOOORED. i still think it deserves a proper platform than just thru my lil ol inbox. it deserves more recognition :( but just the fact that i got to help share their writing alone is an honor of its own!!! i hope ur doing well too, rix anon <3

++ everyone who has left a nice feedback / said anything nice in my notifs or my inbox!! even a simple 'cute' or 'this is good' or even just leaving a note means sososo much to me. i'm just a measly guy in my own little corner on this site, really - so thank u thank u thank u all !!! 🫂

#SORRY FOR THE PINGS Y'ALL 😵 #this is giving 'end-of-the-year post' energy LOL (it's literally the end of april) #but yes why not <33 #ask box! 📬 #anon visitors!

[wavytam]

This is the most primitive question ever but isn't Nami's tatoo a windmill and a tangerine but it's obviously an S? Can you make a post about Luffy's POV regarding SaNami? I wonder how people ship him with Nami when he's fully aware about Sanji's affection to Nami they make him look like a heartless douche

Hello, anon! I don't know how long this ask has been here, so I apologize if it took so long to answer! I didn't see this message before!

Anyway, about what you said.

First, about the tattoo: sorry, but I think it's just coincidental that it has an S shape. I think Oda could still use the drawing of the tattoo for something related to Sanji, though... maybe a pattern in something he wears. Idk. But I don't think Oda made Nami's tattoo with Sanji in mind. Maybe... I can't read his mind lol. It would be really nice if it was the case heh

About how Luffy sees Sanji and Nami: first, I'm not going to say that LN is impossible to happen, honestly.

In my opinion, the interactions Luffy and Nami had feel more like that of a brother and sister than that of a couple, but we never know when it comes to how Oda writes romance. So... Yeah. I still don't see it happening, though, for a series of reasons.

First, like you said, I'm pretty sure that Luffy, in his own way, is aware that Sanji has feelings for Nami. Not only did he witness key moments where Sanji expressed how important Nami is to him, but Luffy also incentives Sanji to help Nami.

Even without caring about romance, Luffy saw Sanji:

volunteer to help Luffy carry Nami up a mountain to find a cure,

almost die in an avalanche to prevent Nami from getting hurt

get so angry over Nami being kidnapped that he lit himself on fire

talk about how Nami is important to him during Whole Cake

So it's safe to say Luffy knows there's something there. And I think that he even incentivates Sanji to help Nami when it's needed.

You came up with an interesting point: considering the way Oda wrote things, specially how Sanji is so enamoured with Nami (again, more than any other woman) it would be weird to make Luffy end up with Nami, with him knowing about Sanji's feelings. I'm saying this in a writing perspective.

To add more fuel to the fire I remember how Oda clearly stated he doesn't care who Luffy is interested in - which is a question he gets frequently, apparently. And just like Oda doesn't care, Luffy also doesn't care about his own love life. His purpose was always to inspire people to seek freedom. I do think he might end up with someone at the end, but I don't think Oda is actively looking for opportunities to give Luffy romantic scenes in the manga.

Sanji's developement, on the other hand, always had to do with love and emotions. So the idea that Oda always planned a romantic stoyline for him is not farfetched, and the person he likes to write Sanji pursuing the most is Nami.

Again, I really don't know what is in that guy's mind, so maybe at the end he still pulls a uno reverse card and makes LN Canon and Sanji doesn't even care lol But I think it would be a really weird choice, considering the things you have pointed out and other moments we have in the manga.

Most of the LN moments can be interpreted as more of siblings growing a bond - rather than a couple having feelings. For SaNami, especially because of Sanji's side, we can't call what he does as sibling-ish at all, even if Oda calls the Strawhat a "family" and says their dynamic should be interpret as such, he was also the one who chose to make Sanji infatuated with Nami. There's also Robin, ofc, but Nami seems to be a lot more in Sanji's mind.

Once again, it all depends on Nami and how Oda writes her reacting to Sanji's pursuits or how she acts towards Luffy.

We have favorable and unfavorable moments, and every time, it was mostly because of how Oda wrote Nami. So let's wait and see.

#SaNami #MyTheories #sanjixnami

[celsidebottom]

Thinking about Zolf wearing little reading glasses

#my very own rqg tag #I was thinking about my big bang piece #and just imagined him with glasses while reading #and now I can't stop thinking about it #I'm pretty sure someone has said this before but! #I love it

[karineverse]

You got any nightmare headcanons?

I'll start :3

I headcanon Nightmare to be blind and the first thoughtful birthday present he got is from the MTT (they stayed up all night with one of those braile stamp labeler thingies) and translated his favorite books into braile so he could re-read them and when they showed him his gift he cried

Also transmasc Nightmare my beloved‼️panromantic demisexual Nightmare my beloved‼️

Hwjsksjbwidbd I love Nightmare sm🥰

HOLY SHIT THOSE HEADCANONS ARE AWESOME?????? I LOVE YOUR BLIND NIGHTMARE 🥺

I don't have good headcanons for everyone, I'm still improving. Augh 😭

I think Nightmare uses it/its and tries very hard to give that villain vibe to everyone, the kind of villain that has 3 children and loves them- WAIT. IS NIGHTMARE. WAIT.

#kv asks #AHAHAHAHAHHS IT WORKS SO WELL #HE EVEN HAS A DUMB TWIN THAT USES THE OPPOSITE COLOR AND HE HATES BUT HE LOVES AND THAT IS THE OPPOSITE OF HIM LMAO #I'm pretty sure someone said it before but it's still funny as fuck #nightmare sans

[thebirdandhersong]

not to be dramatic but will I ever know peace

#will i???????? #i taught this boy to waltz. i taught this boy to communicate his emotions. i taught this boy to not be afraid of vulnerability and honesty. #not to take credit for it ALL but i DID teach him some things and i know because he sure as heck did not do those things before #maybe i should get a t shirt for this. i made it through heartbreak number 3 and all i got was this shirt #not to besmirch his good name but this boy hasn't got a CLUE y'all i can't even tell you #in the same conversation he essentially said yeah you're too old for me and im not attracted to you but if you were a few years younger i'd #consider it he also said. also you're really pretty you smell really good if you want someone to dance with i'm here #and there's this dress you wore before which you look really good in so you should wear it again! #and it has been a roller coaster ever since #genuinely has NOT got a single clue i can tell he was trying hard in that conversation to not freak out but MAN #at risk of sounding self righteous i don't think i deserved half the stuff that's happened since!

[youremyonlyhope]

why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up

#i'm overthinking something that i did and was told off for doing by my director #and on my way home i was thinking when was the last time i was even talked to like that during a production #and then i remembered the costume experience from hell of only a couple months ago that i've already began blocking out #but the thing is that that person was someone i knew i'd never have to work with again #i mean at first i thought i would have to work with them more. then they announced they were moving away immediately #so i only had to deal with them face to face for another weekish after that point and anytime they yelled at me #i was like 'cool. i'll do exactly what you say to do. and nothing more.' but then of course me being me #i did some extra stuff and they initially were like 'oh that's pretty' and then days later told me to cut everything i added #and like sure i get that the show was frozen but girl. that costume was unfinished. i was trying to finish it. it was frozen but looked bad #anyway. whenever they yelled at me and had actual malice in their heart i was like whatever. i was hurt. but i didn't care as much. #but this time it's someone i've worked with many many times before and it was about a habit i have that i know isn't great #but at the same time the thing that prompted it wasn't even me doing this habit it was something else #but she interpreted it as that habit and said that i can't do that on a production she's directing #and that if i couldn't stop then i could pull out from the production and there'd be no hard feelings between us #and honestly i think her reassuring that she knows i'm valuable and that she wants me there while also telling me not to do this thing #and the fact that she's someone i like working with and will continue to work with just made it all hurt so much more #especially since she referenced another past production we've done where i didn't even realize she had noticed that i do this. #and i found myself in near tears. and still am kind of in near tears. i can't decide if i need to cry or not. #and i had NO sleep last night so i was looking forward to sleeping tonight but now i'm just overthinking EVERYTHING #and like. i know everything will be fine. if i just stop inserting myself and stick to just my specific tasks. it'll be fine. #but this is one of the ways my ocd manifests. i feel like i have to personally fix something i notice going wrong. or it'll be bad. #because every single time i choose to sit back and not be nosy when i notice something it ends up bad in a way i could have prevented #if i just inserted myself in a situation i technically wasn't part of but knew i could help or fix. so i just need to not do that. #but then i feel guilt if it does go wrong in the ways i immediately assumed it would and in a way i could prevent. #and i've been trying to work on this for like 6 months and aaaahhhh it's hard and being called out on it from her just really really hurt #i still may or may not cry. i don't know. the irony of me telling my therapist THIS MORNING that it's been a while since i last cried. #and the universe being like 'i took that as a challenge' and handing me this situation for me to spiral over. #i need to leave things alone. i need to stare straight ahead. and ignore whatever isn't specifically for me to do. but ahhh i want to help #and then of course my mom has this same habit and it annoys me when she does it yet i do it to other people and ahhhhhhhh #brain please just shut up. i need to sleep. i have to work tomorrow.

[irregularbillcipher]

going over old fic notes and outlines and character talks with friends and it's always really funny when i get to the stuff i was developing early-mid 2019 where bill just literally kept kryptos around to rag on, and he genuinely just. did not like the man. like was just completely annoyed with his general existence. boy have things changed

#for anyone curious: i came to the conclusion that no amount of 'this guy sucks but he's fun to bully' would get bill to keep someone around #for like literal eons. bill gets bored of his toys too quickly. he'd break 'em. plus the fact that bill decided he was worth saving to begi #with. there was at first an element of 'i owe the guy' because [FIC SPOILERS] and a grudging 'if i had a gun to my head i'd say he was my #best friend i GUESS but do not tell him that' but no real genuine friendship or anything more #before realizing that with the specific story i was going to tell it just made the most sense to have these assholes still be like. #bad people for sure but to actually care about each other. it also just felt too easy to write bill off as someone whose cruelty is just #a lack of certain emotions. like that doesn't automatically make a bad person and a bad person doesn't automatically lack emotion #(there's a character that'll be introduced sometime soon who is aroace and doesn't make friends easily and she's lovely because...) #(idk man. i'm aroace and why shouldn't she be. a lack of affection doesn't make you bad and the ability to feel it doens't make you good) #so bill can and does love people-- even if actual vulnerability is near impossible to get from him-- and kryptos is included in that #it's just that he still sucks really bad and hurts and even kills people that he loves because again. bad person who has no idea how to #navigate relationships healthily because of his own baggage and the environment he grew up in #(also in canon he usually does not want to navigate relationships healthily because. again. he sucks!) #so the only lasting relationship he's ever had where he isn't trying to hurt someone is still just... messy as hell #(and to be fair kryptos is also a p. bad person by adulthood it's just that they're pretty young at this point in the fic) #(so there's less avenues to show that) #kryptos being desperate for any scrap of attention and bill providing the only attention he's ever gotten was always the vibe #but it really was much more of a 'bully and bulling victim who he lets hang around him because said victim' #'is like the only one willing to talk to him' dynamic which is... very much not the case anymore #as said in the tags of my fic. these awful shapes care about each other as best they can care about anyone #anyway sorry idk how much anyone really cares about these tag essays but theyre helpful for me to get my thought process like... down #and track how different the story used to be

[emometalhead]

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#it's so weird spending time with my mom #like she's my mom. I love her. I appreciate her. for the most part I enjoy spending time with her. #sometimes she says things that make me so upset and defeated that it's hard to be around her #today she said the worst people are repressed gay people that aren't out #she said all gay people need to be 'flamboyant and happy' or there's no point #how do I come out to her when she says things like this??? how am I ever supposed to feel safe and supported enough to come out #I panicked and blocked a really nice+pretty girl that genuinely wanted to go on a date with me bc I couldn't think of a way to tell my mom #it's pathetic and I feel awful #I can't drag someone else into this though #my mom also denied that I'm mentally ill. she said my anxiety and OCD don't count and blamed my anxiety on caffeine #she denied it when I said I'm anxious everyday but don't consume caffeine on a daily basis #it genuinely doesn't make my anxiety worse and she's never denied my anxiety in the past so idk what started it now #she also started arguing about some old superstitions my grandma has #these things are so odd/outdated that my dad asked how my grandma is even from the 20th century bc she acts like she was born way before #it made no sense for my mom to suddenly repeat and defend this stuff #idk I'm tired. mentally and physically. didn't sleep too well last night so I'm sure that's contributing to my overthinking #I'm actually feeling fine rn all things considered. it's just exhausting trying to think about the future and how to navigate things #ashley rambles #mom tag

[mistydaysofavalon]

with all the mistakes merlin has made, all the times he's failed to change arthur's destiny, all his decisions that lead to the pieces being just in the right place for arthur's doom, it was arthur who made the decision that killed him in the end.

because this isn't merlin's story.

still, without merlin there would be no story to tell, it would've ended years ago with the revenge of an old woman.

he may be the hero, the villain, the storyteller, the one who sees and so desperately tries to manipulate the strings of the narrative. but while we can see the story from his perspective, noone else does. that's what makes this a tragedy.

noone else sees merlin's struggle to stop the steadily thinning thread arthur's life is hanging by from ripping.

because this story is about king arthur, about the kingdom he built, about camelot, and not about what is needed to keep the narrative alive.

this story ends with arthur.

merlin's tragedy is that he is not merely a figure in a game that is much bigger than him, a game with threads that are interwoven with the very fabric of the world itself. a story with an ending that is predestined and cannot be changed by anyone.

because simultanously he is part of the fabric of the world. he's always manipulating the narrative, trying to change the whole layout of the game because he is told he can.

because he holds onto the hope that he will change destiny.

but in the end it's not merlin's story. it is not his decision to make how this story goes.

still, merlin is the one pulling the strings but so often he's pulling the wrong ones, distracted by what the game could look like, his focus too narrowly fixed on the one this story is supposed to be about, arthur.

and arthur decides to turn his back on the thing woven into the very fabric of the world time and time again. magic.

and so his story inevitably comes to an end.

perhaps merlin could've changed arthur's destiny if he had made this his own story. if he had escaped the game instead of trying to play and manipulate it. but he is part of the fabric of the world, so how could he ever be freed from its rules?

in the end the threads rip and all that's left is a new piece of fabric with all the flaws of the past woven into it.

#bbc merlin #i'm pretty sure this has been said before #but it just hit me when i was watching s5e11 #there's nothing merlin could've done #arthur made a decision and merlin let him #and that is how it ends that's how it goes #(someone take away my internet access when i'm tired please) #i will make this tag a thing because it applies to pretty much everything i post here