#In case anyone has that blacklisted

[goomymegpoid]

I have watched 3 eps of rpdr at this point and i still do not understand the way they communicate on the show at all. Also still think the judges are mad annoying about the runway stuff. Anyway glad spice stayed i like her style, even if i dont want her to win, its kinda visual kei and i love to see it.

The CT girlies are all still here and thats what matters

#rpdr 15 #rpdr #in case anyone has that blacklisted

[wingwisher]

I wonder how different our life would be if we didn't seem to remember literally everything. So many insignificant moments are bundled up in our brain, as well as some extremely meaningful ones that weren't meaningful to the others involved.

I remember first meeting someone I'm still a little bit in love with, who I quit being friends with during a fight shortly after they converted to presbyterianism, I fell in love with them the day we met, and love them still. I never want to speak to them again because neither of us treated each other well and they had what seemed to me horrible reasons for believing all the same things we did. I remember crying for months after they said "brb" then disappeared for 3/4 of a year.

I remember probably our best friend growing up, how we liked damn near all the same things he did, and enjoyed every last moment spent with him. I remember how his mother didn't like me for some reason I still can't understand. I remember the time he got in trouble for putting something on top of the lawn sprinkler while we were over, and we were made to go home because of it even though we didn't do anything wrong. I remember the passion we had designing an imaginary space station while jumping on the trampoline. I remember him scowling at us for a reason we never understood when we said hi after not being allowed to see him for years.

I remember the recurring nightmare we had about running down the street, trying to escape the 2 lane wide giant vehicle trying to chase us down. I remember the recurring nightmare of being buckled into the car seat in the van our gene donors had, not being strong enough to open the button to get out, and then the van starts rolling, and my cries for help were ignored. I remember the recurring dream we were confused by at the time, of the older sibling there to protect us, in the top tubes of a three-floor-tall tube play structure. I remember being confused why they wanted to take us away from our gene donors, why they hated them so much, confused why they wouldn't explain why they wanted to get us away from them so bad. I remember the recurring nightmare of our abusers taking us to a department store to be sold, and absolutely forbidding us from going to the electronics section to play the videogames while waiting to be purchased. I remember the time we woke up without our dream ending, and could see the dream when our eyes were closed, until we opened both.

I remember waking up as a three year old and going down a checklist of things we needed to know to be us, the upcoming events, our name, age, and birthday, our favorite color, the names of the cats. I remember opening our eyes after and everything was normal, specifically I remember not really recalling anything vividly before that day. We now recall that day as when we first split. I know now the reason for said split.

I remember hearing our gene donors gossip about us every night. I remember getting lost in the woods and the first to come to try and help being our only actual parent, the pet cat of the people who were our legal guardians. I remember the odd holes in memory, where people would say we did things we were pretty sure we couldn't have. I remember getting punished for not apologizing to someone who punched me in the head so hard my head was still feeling light. I remember so much pointless cruelty directed at us over so many years. And how everyone always decided we were at fault because we reacted to the abuse.

I remember that time I found a cool rock that looked like a piece of cut chalk, but would sooner scratch cement than be scratched itself. I remember what our girlfriend said the day we started going out, I remember the relief I felt knowing she was with us instead of going back to her ex who only wanted her back after seeing the present she got him for Christmas, after dumping her Christmas Eve. I remember when we first found out we were "we" not "I" the sudden quiet, like a room full of people who didn't know they were screaming all quieted town and started taking turns speaking. The feeling of a knot not coming undone but the ropes sliding effortlessly past each other to come apart.

I remember the first time we enjoyed a cold shower, and were shocked by the sounds we made. I remember the strange feelings we had for someone growing up that we only in this past year or two realized was our first crush. I remember the bleak haze of our mid teens when smiles were rare and enjoyment nearly always just surface level. I remember that haze coming down again last year. I remember the first time I put sandpaper against my face as a child. I remember being frustrated by not being trusted with things I could easily do, and being chided for not asking for help with things I had no clue how to accomplish, and not being given the help I needed even when I did ask. I remember the taste of the water from the electric well where I grew up, and I remember the day our metabolism completely and permanently changed overnight. I remember spending 8 hours making something for a friend after dreaming about her, I remember the first time I ordered soup at a medium spice level as a beverage for the extremely spicy food I ordered. I remember so many things, these weren't all firsts, or important, they were simply listed for being easy to describe.

I remember damn near every conversation with every person I've ever met, and certainly all the ones I've had with people who are likely to see this. I don't think people understand quite how much they mean to us. Even if we've only talked once I can assure you it was deeply meaningful to us and I love you for it.

#Trauma tw #In case anyone has that blacklisted #Love #Rambles #Living life without a backspace button

[cuoredimuschio]

if there's one good thing to come out of all this watcher drama, it's the reassuring knowledge that actually quite a few people also think that ghost files isn't nearly as entertaining as bfu

#been trawling the tag out of morbid curiosity #and it's just nice to know i wasn't alone in that opinion #(i never watched beyond like the third ep of mystery files because it lacked the charm of bfu) #watcher #<- tagging in case anyone has it blacklisted

[femsammy]

#wincest #sam winchester #i wanted to add jack but i ran out of space :( #samifer #cram #samzazel #samjohn #im trying to tag them all in case anyone has it blacklisted #samruby

[lietpolski]

i love the use of human names in hetalia, because they can have such different meanings for different nations!! for younger nations like alfred, it's easy. it's a sign of closeness or endearment. he's always been "alfred f jones" the way he's always been "america", after all. but what about the older nations? denmark and norway smirking at each other over public meetings, calling each other their silly human names they have to use now to "blend in" with the humans. england learning to switch to arthur and finding that he weirdly likes it, likes the pressure it takes off his shoulders. him and france using each other's names like dennor do, at first, teasingly, like "ooh look at us pretending to be mortal little humans who haven't been fighting each other for centuries", but then it grows fonder, softer, less about the joke of "francis" and "arthur" and more about real intimacy. nations who use their names as a symbol of resistance and national pride, liet's happiness at being tolys, distinctly lithuanian, distinctly him after centuries of his language being demeaned, and then decades of it being prohibited in russia's household. nations using human names to mock and hurt each other after a betrayal, a nod to the intimacy they used to share. human names!!

#maja talks #im just so emotional over hetalia nation lore u get me... #hetalia #hws #fruk #dennor #in case anyone has those blacklisted

[eliasdrid]

quick Himeno Ran outfit sketch + color variations

#kingohger #ohsama sentai kingohger #キングオージャー #kingohger fanart #Himeno Ran #my art #Praying Mantis #just in case anyone has that blacklisted! #sketch dump -

[ask-meowscarada]

Happy Halloween, adventurers!

(( I forgot tumblr makes wide images crunchy so please click to view the art in full!

Halloween is really just my excuse to make my characters cosplay as whatever my current interest is ))

#charade meowscarada #blackjack roserade #tricky hatterene #riddle delphox #art post #cw blood #(( very mild on purpose but just in case! )) #baldur's gate 3 #(( also tagging in case anyone has it blacklisted )) #ic

[geneticdriftwood]

fuck, man. just read nightwing vol. 2 #93 and it really is exactly as horrible as everyone says.

and it's released the same month as outsiders 2003 #12, where helena leaves the team, with these parting words to roy:

(outsiders 2003 #12)

like yeah no shit helena!!! blockbuster has been running around bludhaven killing people dick cares about specifically to torture him! telling him that he'll never stop, that by ever allowing himself any human connection he'll be condemning that person to die!

(nightwing vol. 2 #93)

even before this he was blaming himself for donna's death and trying to self isolate. and roy has spent the last three months off the team to recover from getting shot in the chest a bunch, so he hasn't been around to clock just how bad dick's mental health has gotten and try to pull him out of it. of course he isn't letting himself get close to anyone.

#also like. i know that issues from different runs being released at the same time #doesn't necessarily mean they take place concurrently in universe #but i think it works here? though let me know if im wrong on this! #dc #dick grayson #dc meta #outsiders 2003 #nightwing vol 2 #nightwing 93 #<- just in case anyone has that blacklisted #blockbuster #also off topic but why does roy's face look like that here. uncanny valley territory

[ach-sss-no]

It is no longer the Christmas season so I am posting something that is not festive

For @badthingshappenbingo:

Title: Death's Head Prompt: grief/mourning Fandom: LOTR (weird au) Fic is here

#bad things happen bingo #fic: schrödinger's hobbit #...ish #I'm just tagging all of the connected fics with that in case anyone has the tag blacklisted

[arklayraven]

OM devs were like "We're going to keep the first game running, so that new players coming from NB can play the game too!"

Then also secretly were like "We're going to remove some events though, and change up how you can get rewards, which are more difficult to get now, even if you pay to win. As well change/edit older card stories so you can't experience the original options and all. Etc..."

#;little raven speaks #OM is not new player friendly. I can say this safely now. #obey me #tagging in case anyone i follow has this series blacklisted now. which i don't blame ya lol

[r-18g]

some of the stuff in this series really just. looks so fucking questionable. god.

#yay! ^-^ #v speaks! #shadows house #emeto #<- i guess? in case anyone has that blacklisted.

[yugsly]

have you played fear and hunger? i'm surprised you're into it lol

I watch my partner play it while I work. He's got 50+ hours in it (SORRY TO CALL YOU OUT) so I know it all very well. Y'all might not know this about me, but I'm very into studying ancient history/art/religion/occult etc. In fact, it could have been an alternate career path for me. I've been this way since I was very young. So, in that respect, all of the alternate religion/old gods/ancient underground city content in the game fascinates me and I love it very much. I absolutely love seeing people's Agartha or Shambhala-adjacent interpetations. Whoever made it clearly also has the same love of the subjects as I do, I can see all of the specific cultural influences referenced here and there for the lore, environments, and enemy designs. Two stories I would like to make someday also concern these kinds of topics. Though both would be quite the undertaking so I'm saving them for when I have more time. Excited to flex my weird specific historical knowledge. I am also a hardcore horror fan so in that regard, I love it too. I love morbid things (within reason, of course). You'll know this about me if you've read BKMN. And... lastly... I cannot deny it. It's hard to resist pretty men with long hair. And there are many in this game. :)

#fear & hunger #fear and hunger #In case anyone has it blacklisted or something- I understand why! #I want to play it on my own when I have more time!

[corvidsong]

DOG | noun

1.  to cause persistent problems or distress. to follow someone closely and continuously. to follow or track with hostile intent.

#furry #furry art #dog #canine #horror #uncanny #creepy #analog horror #corvid art #corvid ocs #the dog #not sure what else to tag this as in case anyone has words blacklisted for stuff like this >__> #i don't draw horror art often but i like to branch out occasionally lol #not sure how effective it is 😭

[minglana]

two OT (operación triunfo) contestants singing the jota "la palomica", famously interpreted by el pastor de andorra. ainara and juanjo are both from aragon. juanjo has won the aragonese tv contest 'jotalent', and apparently he's also competed in the jotas contest celebrated during the fiestas del pilar

i love to see young people singing jotas, especially in a TV contest about pop music <3

#i havent looked too much into the certamen thing but one article talked abt it ¯\_(ツ)_/ ¯ #also juanjo is the guy that sang la magallonera when they did auditions in zaragoza!!!!! so cool🥺 #jotas #z puya cosetas #operación triunfo #(<- just in case anyone has it blacklisted!) #and yes this is the video that made my rage ignite when they were saying incorrect stuff abt jotas

[beskad]

I am happy to enjoy the visuals of Mando s3, some of the moments, LIZZO AND JACK BLACK MY BELOVED, but all in all, this season is really just a strange AU in my mind.

I'm not mad about Din not being Mand'alor. I'm frustrated that something that was set up to be a Problem was completely forgotten about and then so easily fixed. I'm frustrated that he appeared to be going through some contemplation on what the Creed means to him, just to have it all ignored and Speedrun to a bath in the mines.

I love Katee Sackhoff and she's doing a fantastic job. I'm frustrated by how the scripts are ignoring the fact that she was part of a literal terrorist group who got her sister murdered and her planet obliterated at least twice, and the show is ignoring that fact. She's had opportunities to talk about it, other characters have had opportunities to bring it up, and favloni seems to just be ignoring/reconning it. Why make all these references to a messy part of TCW/Rebels if you're not going to actually address the whole topic?

I am fine with the show being about more than just Din, or transitioning away from him as Pedro becomes increasingly busy with other projects. What I'm not fine with is the bait and switch, and telling us MID SEASON that "oh it's not about Din anymore" without a satisfactory conclusion to his arc.

This show worked because it was about Din who was just Some Guy who got attached to this kid who he was supposed to turn in for money, and how that relationship changes him. Abandoning that is a huge mistake and I think we are all learning that the hard way.

#din djarin #i am adding the following tags just in case someone has them blacklisted (i am not trying to ruin anyone's persinal enjoyment here) #(we can all like whatever we want to like i'm just pointing out some structural issues in the storytelling. this is not a moral judgement) #star wars critical #mando critical #the mandalorian spoilers #rray.txt #god look at me engaging in discourse however low key #what have i become #i say these things because i LOVE star wars and want it to be good or at least maintain its previously established quality level

[dyouknowwhatimean]

honestly I’d just like to hear any of your thoughts on euphoria because everyone I hear that talks about euphoria kind of sucks and doesn’t discuss it in an interesting way

okay so what interests me the most about euphoria is obviously nate, jules and cal's storyline. nate and cal's relationship is possibly the most interesting and layered exploration of an unconsumated incestuous relationship i've ever seen on tv in my life. nate is clearly very traumatized by having seen his dad's porno tapes and often puts himself in the place of his victims, both the extents he takes his body to, and his taste in women are very influenced by all of this plus the idea of masculinity his dad enforces while also nate tries not to be like his dad (gay).

i also don't wanna get too much into it but nate's relationship with his mom is very interesting to me too. when cal leaves the house in s2 there's this scene in which nate's mom starts calling nate "the man of the house" and starts sort of flirting with him, i can't remember if she's drunk.

on the other hand nate is of course an abuser and a rapist himself, his relationship with cassie might be more interesting to me in that sense than his relationship with jules or with maddy if only because of how much the audience completely turned to hating cassie and refused to see her as the victim there. but his relationship with jules is of course abusive too, and again very tied to cal himself. it's different tho cause most of it happens online (i can't remember if they use grindr the entire time? but it's gotta be either that or instagram or texting or something) and then a lot of it only in jules' mind. still there's examples of lovebombing and manipulation, and of course he physically threatens her when they finally meet in person.

this is like, my favorite part of the show, then again it's still buried under one thousand million layers of sam levinson transphobia and misogyny. jules' character suffered a lot of whatever the opposite of character development is in s2 too. in the special episode she accepts herself and comes out as a lesbian, just to hook up with a guy who felt like a "how to be a chaser 101 manual for dummies" in s2. and, in a show where they're all teenagers allowed to make mistakes, the audience somehow decided that she was an irredeemable monster for cheating on rue, which. whatever. who knows if rue and her ever even defined the relationship. but that's not the point.

i also really like the way euphoria handles drug addiction, for all the shit it gets about how it's "unrealistic" i personally think it's very genuine there (it's based on levinson's personal experiences, at the end of the day) and i think it's really well done, i never understood that specific criticism

#hope this wasn't too much rambling again i guess im just much better with direct questions jajdjas #euphoria #<-in case anyone has it blacklisted #💌