#It got me extremely emotional

[welcometogrouchland]

ANOTHER SKETCH DUMP! Featuring more of me playing with lineless art. Batman reborn era trio (dick, damian and steph) I miss you...when will you return from war. Also featuring Steph designs bc I've seen ppl dissatisfied w/ her current look, some good mom Talia, and Jason Todd poetry club. Duke is confused not that Jason would start a poetry club but that he'd have such mid poetry opinions. (ID in Alt)

#dc comics #batfamily #damian wayne #stephanie brown #dick grayson #talia al ghul #duke thomas #cassandra cain #mine #woo new art tag. please god let me keep this up all year #uhh anyway yeah! still a big backlog of sketches but i got burnt out which means i had time to collect some #i feel like my art looks. extremely different w/o lines compared to with? idk i worry that's it weird/off-putting #but hey at the end of the day I'm hardly worrying about my brand integrity on tumblr dot com #duke and cass being at poetry club is based on them canonically being into poetry and for a good while duke and jason got along well #Steph is there for both jason and cass' emotional support (unfortunately there's a design flaw. she can't do both simultaneously) #(which is fine bc cass is fleeing the scene at the idea of having to casually hang out with jason) #(they're the exact amount of similar and more importantly different that it's like putting two firecrackers together. bad) #i really like the steph mask designs... it'd be fun to do something with them but idk what y'know? #I'm just like. if we're assuming that her mask has to be different from both babs and cass then this is what I've got as alternatives #i mostly wanted to practice character interaction with the talia and damian one... and also i love them #looking at james gunns batman movie proposal. you keep your hands OFF HER MR GUNN #please if shes evil in a movie they're never gonna let her be good in the comics again 😭 #dc when you inevitably cave and do your next big reboot let the ppl finally have the son of the demon origin (w/ tweaks of course) #idk it's canon in my heart. heartcanon if you will <3 #anyway yeah uhhhhhh enjoy?

[beanghostprincess]

Sanji being the only one checking up on Usopp during Water 7 and Enies Lobby makes me ill. The second Luffy and Usopp are arguing and Sanji kicks his own captain for acting that way. The way he snaps at literally everyone. Like-- Okay, everyone was irritable and emotional at the moment because Usopp was leaving. But there's just something about the way they portray Sanji's anger and reaction towards the situation that makes me go insane. It's not only the fact that he defends Usopp at all costs, but also how he's the one verbalizing it too. He cares deeply about him. And I feel Sanji is the one who would look around him to look for Usopp even when he knows he isn't there. And then he finds him again, and the first thing he does is kick Franky for hurting him. No hesitation. "Our long-nose" what do you mean OUR???? He finds the possessive somehow comforting because Usopp is still theirs, no matter what. And then Usopp acts like a proud, stubborn, dramatic idiot. And he wears that stupid Sogeking suit and Sanji is just so done with him but in the most endearing of ways. Then the whole "I'll do what you can't, and you'll do what I can't" thing happens, and it's so important for Usopp's character. It makes him trust in his crew and believe in himself and his abilities and it's Sanji the one saying it because he was with Usopp in Alabasta when Usopp told Chopper "Just do whatever you can". It's just so beautiful. The bond Sanji and Usopp have throughout the series and how much it shows in Water 7 and Enies Lobby that Sanji cares about him in a different way he cares for the others. He wants to protect him but he knows Usopp can do it alone. He protects him when it matters. Sanji understands Usopp because he's been there before, feeling left out, weak, and inferior. Then the whole drama happens yadda yadda yadda. And when Usopp is plotting how to get back to the crew, the one listening is Sanji. He asks himself what is the idiot he has for a friend doing, but he stays to listen to him. To keep an eye on him. He could've just told him to come back right at that moment. Talk to him. But he didn't because he knew this was something Usopp had to do for himself. He just watched his steps carefully and wished for the idiot to come back soon. And you know, I think it's nice to see how Sanji keeps Usopp close all the time.

#i am having a moment #i am sorry i was just rereading some water 7 / enies lobby things and i got extremely emotional with these two #i just think they get each other in such a deep way it makes me go wild #one piece #black leg sanji #usopp #sanuso #water 7 #enies lobby

[minalots]

MORE WOLFWOODS?!!!!?!?!!?????

#wolfwood #nicholas d. wolfwood #trigun #trigun stampede #trigun maximum #tristamp #trimax #here’s some of my personal design notes for them #tristamp ww is more softer/rounder than trimax #his hair is very messy n i just think adding splashes of color and graphics like outlines n halftones to my tristamp doodles makes it seem— #more modern in a way ig??? ya get me??? #anyways trimax ww is just. SUPER SHAPED. lots of sharp edges!!! so fun!!!!! #i like to think his hair is usually yknow spiky n compact into its shapes until he gets unhinged to which it slowly becomes disheveled— #and messy and softer. Like if his hair lost its gel that was keeping it together or something. anyways his eyes are normally black until— #he starts feeling extreme emotions so they turn white auaghwwg i just admire nightow’s way of drawing ww he is just !!!!! so cool!!!!!! #ww is just very fun to draw in general im so glad i got into trigun bc of him ehehehejgeeh #i forgot to mention i draw each of them with different brushes to get different textures n stuff idk if it was noticable #da gallery

[fortes-fortuna-iogurtum]

I've been reading Exodus lately and I've just gotten to the portions where God gives the first commands to the people via Moses (twice), and then goes on to give detailed instructions about the tabernacle and how it should be built, and I'm just... we think art is unimportant?? we think things only mean as much as their functionality?? we so easily fall into the trap of believing that beauty means nothing, that it's cheap and only worth whatever mindless distraction it brings, that it's barely more than a cheap sensual thrill, that buildings should just be practical and plain and cheap, that everything should be functional but ultimately disposable, that paintings and dresses and mugs and curtains and carpets are just pretty but have no real value, that beauty is fleeting and vain and therefore shouldn't be thought about too much, if even looked for at all... we fall into these traps so easily, and we forget that there are chapters upon chapters of painstakingly detailed plans to build one portable worship tent, and those plans have been handed down through thousands of years of human history, because beauty and art and skill in craft is important

#I have to go get ready for work now but I will come back to this #and don't even get me started on the parts about God calling specific craftsmen *by name* #he called them!! by name!!! he said 'this man is good at his job. he creates beautiful work. he will build my temple and make it beautiful' #and even more--God inspired him!!!! it was a calling of GOD for him to create beautiful carvings and tapestries and candlesticks!!! #look even if you're not jewish or christian or religious at all you have GOT to see what it means that all these incredibly detailed plans #for building this tent-temple are extremely important #because even if you don't believe in God and don't think that this is all significant bc he personally gave the instructions #and then helped preserve this record of them so we could still read them today #you do have to see how important they were to the people of that time who first wrote them down #and the extreme care that was taken to record all of those detail #AND the fact that it's been preserved for so long and we can still read all the care that was put into creating this incredible piece #of artwork and worship they made #gurt says stuff #I just. gahhfhhfj. I'm feeling emotional about chapters of the Bible that I can't even fully force myself to pay attention to #bc there's so MUCH and I'm bad at visualizing this stuff and I tend to zone out while listening to it #but the fact that it IS that much!!! that there SO MUCH DETAIL and it goes on for SO LONG that I even struggle to pay attention!!! #that this was THAT IMPORTANT to the people who wrote it and to God!!! as an artist and someone who has always cared about art #this means so much to me ok #christianity #bible verse #bible thoughts #exodus #art #theology

[hecksupremechips]

Come back home when you have some sense

You can throw your life away just not at my expense

You’re not the son I raised

#jhariah #this one just rawrrfrrr #and then uh another line thats like ‘tell me did you raise a man?’ #nice #im just listening to the new album to cope with nasty sickness and feeling out of it #god this album is really good it has every emotion in there like this song for example just the part where they scream the chorus its like #hnnnghhh #hm some other moments from the album im liking a lot uhhh i love re: concerns a lot #the part where hes like reading off the complaints and then the part where hes just screaming and its like BAM BAM BAM BAAAM #sasuke is so good and the bit at the end where its like ‘i just want you to know im so so...’ #like hes gonna say sorry but cant seem to say the word for whatever reason and i know nothing about sasuke #but i has to imagine the fan girlies are eating gravel over that one lol it gets me #and theres just that like spooky echoing afterwards #the intro to fire4fun goes SOOOOOOOO hard i was losing my shit its awesome #the entirety of trust ceremony is giving me big feelings but specifically that part towards the end where its all quiet and you hear #its like whistling i think? like a marching band is coming in maybe #but it also kinda sounds like nature too and idk i like got a little bit um magical at that part cuz i was driving down a big hill #and it had been raining but there was a clearing in the clouds and the sun was bright and like at this particular hill #you can just see everything like the land stretches for miles theres trees hills the river farms all that shit #and idk with the extreme stress and depression ive been feeling its hard to have these moments where life seems worth it #and its hard to really feel anything anymore or to feel in the moment but idk i was just going down that hill seeing everything and it was #very majestic so yeah that song is definitely gonna have the same effect as pin eye for me #which i must mention pin eye again its still OOOOGHH very good it came at a pretty good time for me #yeah basically this album is uhhhh whats keeping me somewhat grounded rn i recommend 👍

[rushingheadlong]

You know something I don't think I've ever seen people talk about is how Freddie changed the lyrics for Big Spender.

Because in case you don't know, all original versions of the song are sung by women - and it is made very clear that they are singing to men:

The minute you walked in the joint I could see you were a man of distinction A real big spender [....] So let me get right to the point: I don't pop my cork for every man I see Hey, big spender Spend a little time with me

Probably not too surprising, then, that when Queen performed this song in 1974 Freddie had to do a bit of a gender-switch on it:

Though, it would probably be more accurate to say that Freddie made this song gender-neutral because he didn't change it to be about a woman. He eliminated the first use of "man" entirely and then sang "I don't pop my cork for everyone I see" (instead of "every man").

And honestly there's probably a whole dissertation you could write just about those changes alone, but what I really love is when Queen brought the song back in 1986 and Freddie changed the lyrics again:

Because yes he still dropped the first "man" but the "everyone" is changed and Freddie instead sang "every guy" with just the barest hint of a "-rl" sound at the end to give him plausible deniability if anyone asked about it.

So much of Freddie's music speaks to his experiences as a queer man but, because of the nature of the times in which he lived, he couldn't always be directly open about that fact. Most of his love songs are intentionally vague, and he sang about "somebody" or "you" to avoid having to use gendered terms as much as possible.

Freddie singing "I don't pop my cork for every GUYrl I see" wasn't just an adjustment to the original lyrics, it was a specific change from how Freddie had sang it before in order to make it more gay in a way that he could rarely be with his own music, and that is what I adore about this. It's such a little thing, but it gives such a unique insight into how Freddie balanced his sexuality and his stardom, and how the relationship between those two changed over the nearly 12 years between these performances.

#freddie mercury #queen #queen band #freddie #text #ramblings #long post // #I got the Rainbow on dvd for xmas and I've been thinking about this a lot since then #and thinking about it even more after posting yesterday's gifset #it's SUCH a little thing but it's made me emotional ever since the first time I've noticed it #the transformation from Freddie ''I can't tell anyone I'm gay or it'll ruin everything'' Mercury in 1974 #to Freddie ''Four cocks fighting - ooh it's getting nice this!'' Mercury in 1985 #perfectly summed up in two video clips #idk. sometimes I feel like in defense of Freddie's queerness some fans take it to the opposite extreme #and insist that it was SO UNBELIEVABLY OBVIOUS TO EVERYONE ALL THE TIME in the 70s/80s that Freddie was gay #when in actuality... no it really really wasn't #and that's IMPORTANT. the ways in which Freddie had to hide himself and the ways in which he chose not to are IMPORTANT. #and erasing those decisions from his history or pretending they were easy ones to make isn't defending his queerness #it only serves to erase it even further

[aq2003]

saw a letterboxd review of 2009 hamlet saying they didn't like how hamlet just seemed to be crazy all of the time and i was reminded of when david tennant said this

#literally exactly how IIIIII feel about HIS hamlet like brother i fucking get it #hamlet #not to say hamlet is very rational bc categorically he isnt but like. #if the thing in MY head that told me to be considerate of the ppl around me got switched off i would act + feel extremely similarly to him #and why would hamlet be very considerate of the emotions of the ppl around him if he's being told #that his feelings are unworthy of his status and that he should move on (when ALSO there is a clear injustice happening besides his grief) #not talking abt his sexism that is a WHOLE different beast that changes completely depending on a variety things including his gender #but like his sadness and anxiety and frustration and anger and fear are all very very very familiar to me

[marmaladelike]

gentle skin to skin contact is a rare gift in this movie . lucie’s [human] voice gave anna the power to persevere, not the closeness to seeing something otherworldly. the voice of god and the voice of lucie are similar in what they inspire; human connection is instinctive to want and the voice of a friend and the feeling of love is endlessly more (traditionally positively) moving than a mystical idea emphasizing the loss of life

#i think a lot of this is arguable actually #martyrs 2008 #being moved by something otherworldly or/and nonhuman is also very powerful but very isolating? only in terms of things that aren’t #religions really since religion is driven (i may be wrong) by the fact that it’s a *group* of people who believe and not just like . one. #again i might be wrong about that . i don’t know enough #rereading and sctual a mystical idea emphasizing loss of life is actually very powerful But driven by fear/negative emotions? maybe . #definitely not always though #martyrs #new french extremity #this post doesn’t make sense the more i reread it i #i’m just glad i got to get all of it out . my mom is refusing to let me talk about this movie to her

[b4kuch1n]

tdov was like a week ago already but I just wanna say when I came over to vacation slash help my sworn brother move flat he told me, "ever since you said you wanted to get top surgery I've been thinking about it. it's straight up number two on my bucket list"

#bakuspeech #number one is a house bc obviously. if u can own a house wouldnt u #he was very drunk at that time of the evening. I was not bc I have the constitution of a hot air balloon and any stimulant will blow me up #(relatively new development. france fucked me up big time turns out) #we held hand on his bed for like the whole evening. it was honestly very funny in hindsight but we were extremely earnest in the moment #and Im like. working on this thing as well. I dont got meds or therapy lmao Im bootstrappin here #but yeah early last year his bf offered to get me meds and I... turned it down... I think I was worried abt like. idk. something #but one year past looking back Im fully like that was a stupid move you shouldve gotten meds. youve once again fucked urself baku #but yeah with that kinda realization Ive also come to realized I've somewhat? accepted. that I'm just gonna be. like this #this in light of a number of likely chronic stuff too (hence my balloon-like constitution lmao) and #that's kinda bled into the rest of me without me really noticing #but him bringing that up fully unprompted... kinda jolted me out of it #its just. really incredibly sweet. that someone doesn't want me to settle for what I make do with #and like. preps for that work. just kinda held my hand and told me it's possible to do this actually #I didn't really express how I felt very well in that moment I think my brain is very bad and I process emotions with like a day of delay #but. well. Im thinking abt it Right Now. so yknow thats the kind of impact that had on me lol #not super sure why I wrote all this down here really. I think I just want a good n nice reminder that object permanence is real #and I exist in my friends' life even when Im going insane in a hole by myself #and with the power of friendship we can alter the universe's plan for ourselves and also kill god #that's that. anyways I eat lunch now and then pass out probably. last night was... eventful lmao #but!! very good things on the horizon hopefully. well manifestly we hold hammers and we use them #have a good day lads. let's go out and slay monsters under a highway

[imreallyloveleee]

three conversations about one thing

He’d known there would be consequences when he made this decision. But he hadn’t realized how quickly they might steamroll right over him.

(Jughead & Veronica & Cheryl & Betty & memories of the future. Set post-7x19.)

read it on ao3.

#bughead #bughead fic #riverdale fic #riverdale #betty cooper #jughead jones #veronica lodge #cheryl blossom #i *finally* finished this so now i can finally turn back to finishing some of my WIPs!!! #writing it was somewhat cathartic for me tho #i need these characters to feel some gd EMOTIONS about the EXTREMELY EMOTIONAL thing that happened where they GOT ALL THEIR MEMORIES BACK #GAH #anyway i hope you guys enjoy it <3

[rainymoodlet]

I'd be appalled if I saw you ever try to be a saint I wouldn't fall for someone I thought couldn't misbehave But I want you to know that I've had no love like your love

From nobody. 🌵

#ts4 #ts4 edit #ts4 screenshots #ts4 gameplay #;tjol #;tjol+ #ts4 legacy #sim: dallas #sim: shingo #|| #🥹 i am overwhelmed with emotions okay #engagement photos for my babies~ because never in my whole life did i think a randomly generated sim would capture my love like rangi did #but here shingo is :') now the whole 'nanny sasaki is here' notif makes me so emotional when i find it in screenshots dsfjkhd #for a small summary: dallas is my tjol founder + shingo is the first nanny that showed up to babysit ivory (our heir) when she was just an #infant :') he had a higher relationship with ivory than dallas did for a while dfhjfsd #he is such a sweet and caring sim and he's almost dallas' polar opposite - they're brash and loud and shingo is patient and quiet #he made them massive amounts of food every time he came over. it was the same routine: show up - put ivory to bed - make food - play w dogs #the 2 got extremely close & shingo was the one who always invited dallas out to festivals (i never took pics but they went to the festival #of lights when ivory was a lil bab it was so sweet ;o;) he kind of empathized with their situation & never judged them for calling at 11pm #before they went to work at 'the flamingo'. i was resistant to their totally natural developing relationship bc i was like?? no dallas is #way too hot for me to post them with this elder sim and say 'LISTEN ITS JUSTIFIED BECAUSE THEY'RE IN LOVE' but like... #if y'all had watched them the way i have you would understanddd #shingo loves dallas and ivory with all of his little pixel cpu-processed autonomous heart and its genuinely so fcking sweet i'm such a nerd #abt it but ughhh you have no idea T^T dude canonically doesn't want kids he's like 'nah ivory is my daughter i'm GOOD' mans is a #family-oriented nanny and when dallas asked him if he'd like children he said 'nah i'm good'. to their gorgeous face. like my guy that is #willpower of STEEL. IVORY WOULD'VE HAD A SIBLING SO FAST MAN DALLAS WAS READY WITH A CAPITAL R. #im not shitting u the 'loves partners butt/muscles' shows up every time they **** its precious. dallas is besotted with him and i never #should have denied them each other dsjkhdas #MY RANT IS DONE I PROMISE #I LOVE THEM SO FCKING MUCH THANK YOU FOR LISTENING TO ME TALK ABT MY PIXEL PEOPLE

[srapsodia]

ghost trick really is such a great game I GET THE HYPE NOW I GET IT!!!! IM RIGHT THERE WITH YALL!!!!

#finished it yesterday and my roomate came in while i was watching the credits and asks me what happened #and im like SO MUCH HAPPENED. SO MUCH HAPPENED OH MY GOD AAAAAAAAA #FANTASTIC game ugh ughhh. extremely shu takumi ass game in the best possible way djdjdk #shu takumi truly makes the queerest characters and we thank him for his service #cabanela and jowd.... i am looking i am LOOKING 👁👁 #also king of weird little girls. A+ character designs. the animations were stellar and the MUSIC AUGHHH #im in love with everything about this game. that scene with ray... i got *EMOTIONAL*. I YELLED #truly game of all time #raps talks

[vaguely-concerned]

travis matagot just -- the very concept of him unlocks something deep and feral in my brain, even aside from all the changeling stuff. an angel looked upon you once as a child and, after seeing every possible thread and pathway of the man you will grow into one day, said 'I see no sin here' even as its holy flames consumed your screaming parents and the town around you. that angel, having stumbled head over heels to earth after killing god, later deliberately loses their name to you in a card game so the eyes of heaven can't find them. you and the angel have proceeded to annoy the everloving FUCK out of each other for centuries because you just keep. bumping. into each other!!!! through the power of like Narrative and also simply being two of the only people who've even been around that long. you've kept their name for them this whole time and never breathed a word of it, even though they seemingly never even explained why they wanted to lose it in the first place. you've sworn to die together or not at all.

what if you met an eldritch horror as a child and then became their best (and most irritating) friend/life partner/frenemy/perpetual thorn in their side (affectionate). I'm obsessed with this idea of being divinely judged as unworthy of damnation so early in your life and having to have that in the back of your head forever even as your self-loathing and trauma start piling up over the centuries and you have done so many shitty things along the way. like. is he trying to prove them wrong. is that part of his whole thing about trying to escape the narrative. or is it to prove that 'no actually awful things happen to me because I'm awful, you got it wrong from the start (fuck you btw)' because at least that feels like a choice, like some kind of control to hold on to? what is going on here travis. what the fuck

#skyjacks #campaign skyjacks #travis matagot #gable skyjacks #trable #like mostly in a. narrative/thematic sense?? because both the bickering everyday dynamic and the uh Cosmic scale ones... #sets my head spinning honestly. what the hell #I'm catching up with this podcast and spoiler warning: it's still excellent #just how easily travis accepted that gable was the angel that destroyed his hometown (including his parents) is so funny and so sweet to me #he was just like 'eh. more than enough water under that bridge to wash that one clean tbh #I am also a huge albino turkey for this hugely emotional conversation btw' #and he's equally blasé about finding out gable like. caused the partial end of the world. #the only time he freaks the FUCk out is when he finds out they lied about having figured out how to die so he got to leave first #skyjacks spoilers #anyway listen to campaign skyjacks it is extremely good and travis actually is Like This all the time #he's a jaded depressed old man in the body of a trickster twink. one of the ideal character archetypes tbh

[daz4i]

learn this guy's secret for great acting in just a few simple steps

#in acting school teachers told me it seems that thing came natural to me #HOWEVER one told me I'm a bit too exaggerated for like. on-camera stuff and more fitting for stage acting #because. to compensate for being unable to show emotions as a kid. i kind of went to the other extreme it seems 🫡 #anyway i made my singing teacher cry today- #(in a good way. she got emotional from my apparently emotional singing)

[solarisgod]

It aren’t about anyone here, but while it's already been stated on guideline, to make a personal psa in depth, if we notice the Starwake System and especially Micah are being infantilized / overly sexualized / excessively underestimated, it's a hardblock. A prominent pattern we notice is when most prompts we're given from a mun involves Micah being comforted / assisted, which we personally find it demeaning. Especially as an Asian individual who experiences all of these three aspects in the rpc / on the internet and especially in real life, I'm really not in the mood to let our muses, especially my most beloved Asian OCs, be subjected to such treatments.

With Micah in this case when it comes to infantilization and the underestimating, they are extremely emotional and sensitive as they can be childish and dependent, just as I am too, but no muses should be always babying and underestimating them. Micah is quite powerful and skilled, and they were quite known to be highly aggressive and wrathful when they were younger--- they CAN be so as wrath is actually their biggest vice, believe it or not, it's just they actively choose not to / try not to due to experiences and mindsets while they had gone through sessions with both their personal therapist and alter therapist with Phoebus who helped them find ways to manage their anger issues and intrusive thoughts. There's just so many layers and factors to their "childlike" traits that I can write essays on, but basically, their traumas and lack of certain experiences and treatments and having certain needs make them the way they are. I'd never write characters as silly or childish to poke fun or coddle and people shouldn't either nor narrow characters into one trait because they happen to have foolish or childish traits.

Being small and petite or emotional and gentle, what have you, should not make one a weak person and I really wish more folks can understand that, truly, speaking out for both characters and people.

#𓁹 ༑ ࿐ྂ ⩇⩇ : ⩇⩇ ⚠︎ [ 𝙴𝚇𝙸(𝚂)𝚃 : 𝙶𝙾𝙳 ] * ‹ PSA . › #[ once more not about any of our current mutuals but it is based on past roleplay experiences with recent irl ones ] #[ got a white man few days ago looking at me funny with a ' you ordered this? ' when I was getting UberEats order from him few days ago ] #[ and was like ' hahah these are heavy be careful ' and pretended to drop the bags of food by quickly lowering 'em down ] #[ when I was going to reach out to take 'em from him ] #[ and my Asian placement colleague on Halloween told me I got ' baby hands ' which is just... well alright ] #[ I punched my phy. and emot. abusive and toxic mom as a self defense in few cases with these hands when she tried to hurt me ] #[ so... ain't so baby ] #[ I'm just exhausted being treated this way and the same with our OCs ; knowing being Asian is a factor to these mindsets and treatments ] #[ my significant beloved is the only person who can baby me as even I wouldn't want our other starmates to treat me that way ] #[ same with Micah being okay with Adoniram and Warlock and their starmates doing so ] #[ when it comes with a lot of build over time on the trust and confidence ] #[ that we're not being taken advantage of and being judged on and being underestimated all at once ] #[ just please be mindful how you're treating and thinking about someone ] #[ anyways yeah I'm just. yeah! this needs to be said. we extremely appreciate the read ; thank you so much ♡ ]

[katyspersonal]

:(

#shitposting #fandomry rambles #the one time I broke the rule mico and edgar got pretty much ruined for me #and it was stupidly hard to recover them in my eyes #reading fanfics is just not 'cOnSuMiNg CoNtEnT' for me #it is extremely important thing for me and I invest my heart and wrap my mind around it #like you saw my lore essays and headcanons? I get invested and think VERY hard about what I am reading #that's why I can't afford investing into a fanfic unless I feel safe #which happens only if either 1) ficwriter is a no-presence in the fandom and unaccessible for communication by default #2) they specifically invited me to read their story and wanted *my* feedback or #3) they're very close friend who made a pact with their blood to not ghost or betray me #it is also my strong sensitivity to verbal communication itself #like I can't describe how much something well written means for me and how strong emotions I feel