#Like I go off positively all the time

[fujii-draws]

OKAY! Chatot rant in tags below! Read at your own discretion.

#okay starting from the beginning of where ppl usually dislike him. apple woods chapter. #he doesn’t give hero/partner the CHANCE to explain themselves despite them being relatively good recruits up until that point. #and that legit might be my only gripe with that chapter bc!!! stories need conflict! I LIKE the conflict in apple woods!!! #hero and partner being punished so something they didn’t do! #the misunderstanding! how team skull (Skuntank) actually outplays the main duo with a clever yet rotten trick. I LOVE that it segways into- #one of the more sweeter scenes of guild members looking out for eachother. I LIKE APPLE WOODS CONFLICT. #but chatot just. not giving them a chance. is so dumb. #I’d personally fix this by having a lil montage of hero/partner fucking up on jobs. A LOT. and chatot giving them a pass every time. #and let the perfect apple incident BE the one where he puts his foot down and doesn’t listen to them. bc he’d given them loads of chances. #and doesn’t want to hear any excuse. #but yeah. I legit dont mind him during that chapter except for that really stupid and frustrating moment. #NOW. CHAPTER 17. #UGGGGHHH WHERE DO I BEGIN #Him not believing hero and Partner about Grovyle and the future being in ruin? FINE. ACTUALLY GOOD. BC CHATOT WOULD BE SKEPTIC. #IT FITS HIS CHARACTER!! #BUT WHAT DOES SUCK. IS HIM GOING ‘Dusknoir isn’t the bad guy. he didn’t do anything wrong’ #WHEN HE LITERALLY KIDNAPPED HERO AND PARTNER RIGHT I N F R O N T OF HIM. #(​NO LITERALLY. HIS CHARACTER IS IN THE FRONT ROW WHEN IT HAPPENED.) #and him. having the GALL to tell hero and partner they must’ve been ‘seeing things’ and downplaying the HELL they went through. #despite them being missing for hours/days. his own guild recruits. and his angry sprite showing up. #like. I think that’s when I genuinely despised him. #that and him going ‘OH I BELIEVED YOU THE WHOLE TIME HEEHOO :)’ shit was so fucking annoying. #just playing it off as a joke the second the guild started to believe hero and partner. #IMAGINE IF HE W A S ACTUALLY TESTING THE GUILD’S TRUST. SHOWCASING HIM AS THE MORE RESPONSIBLE AND RESPECTFUL RIGHT HAND OF THE GUILD. #and yes. Brine cave he saves hero and partner. but at that point I just didn’t care anymore. #he fucked those two over so much. that I didn’t care what ‘valiant’ sacrifice he had. #and he grills Team Skull for what they did OFF SCREEN. they couldn’t even give us THAT. #<<< THAT or him outright saying sorry would’ve been nice. IKIK his ‘actions’ or whatever but. #eughh again this is all imo. I’m not trying to make people hate him or change their mind. #I’ll get into positives in the second post cause I’m running out of tags

[storfulsten]

Whitty And Bf Personality Swap? Lovely Art By The Way, Truly Inspiring. ( ´ ∀ `)ノ～ ♡

hm I guess k, not feeling the most creative but here lol

idk lol

mostly based on this bc idk thought the vibes looked fitting in theory lmao:

#bombeep #whittyxbf #not the shippiest but eh still endgame so still tagging lol #personality swap sort of #couldn't think of much so just general silly vibes I guess ha #based on a very early point in time relationship-wise pre-friendship and all #like right after whitty'd reluctantly accepted bf's offer to stay at his place off the street at least for a lil bit #but still wanting nothing to do with him in general #while bf'd just try his best to make him chill out and relax with his charm and positive vibes but not succeeding very well just yet lol #so ye just imagining that scenario but swapping their places more or less vibe wise while they still look the same as usual counts right? #am not very creative sorry hope it's still passable lmao #bg kinda dumb but felt empty without any I guess so general vague shapes it is #yes I know bf looks too small scale-wise for it and whitty's probably way off too but at this point it's too much work to go back sorry ha #so yea sorry for general wonkyness lol #take it or leave it #enjoy or don't #whatever floats your boat #fnf au #fnf shipping #boyfriend #whitty #bf #I draw what I want #thanks for the suggestion #sorry that it's like 4+ months late ah well here it is anyways lol #stay groovy friendo

[13eyond13]

I think the moment Light's crush on L first smacked him in the manga (like when it finally rooted and started blooming in his guts) was when L was like "you're my first ever friend" whilst smirking into his teacup. And not because Light fully believed he was being sincere about being friends, but because he KNEW L was slyly teasing him and speaking to him on more than one level at once. Nothing more unexpected funny flattering and intriguing than that for him right then

#im thinking about this specifically because of that post about the girl getting a huge crush on her enemy that saved all her threats #bc that's basically that moment for light i think #light tries to squash all positive emotions towards others at all times when he's kira if they interfere with his plans after all #but if L does something like this to him then it forces him to think about his feelings in a strategic preparation sort of way #nay dare i say it basically is giving light permission to do so #he can now hold off on completely stamping out those feelings as soon as they arise #almost (he thinks) as a way to study his enemy and see how full of shit he may or may not actually be about such things #this moment probably starts a shift in light where he can allow himself to acknowledge that he maybe has a bit more than just #enemy feels for L you know #bc maybe L also is having other kinds of feels about him?? #whether or not it's true it would impress him as a bold move #and kickstart him having to analyze what he actually does sincerely feel for L #and maybe start reframing and recontextualizing a lot of their tense ambiguous interactions up til that point secretly as well #heck we basically see him doing that when hes like lounging at his desk going HAH if it's friendship he wants then by god it's friendship #he will get #and this game of chicken with L about saying theyre friends keeps him from being able to completely avoid confronting #any complicated feels #like he otherwise probably would #because he legit cant back down from preparing for another battle of the wits with L #both because of his competitive pride and his genuine need to protect himself #would he call it a crush to himself yet #no probably not #i feel like that came later much later #he def would have acknowledged it as such by the end of the story tho #essentially L found a way to create a little wedge to ram in the door to Light's feels #and that is a smart enough move to probably have made Light start developing a crush on him even if he didn't have one already #l lawliet #light yagami #lawlight #p

[relicsongmel]

The Hawthorne twins suffered more than Jesus

#mel's musings #dahlia hawthorne #iris hawthorne #local woman going feral over sister iris ace attorney for the 261478th time. more at 11 #aa #thinking about. how at one point they were the daughters of the fey clan's MAIN FAMILY #meaning one of them was in line to become master at some point #(i waffle on which one it was bc there's no clear answer in canon but if anyone else has thoughts do feel free to share) #imagine being in that position. and then discovering you have no spiritual powers #and everyone (including your own mother) starts treating you like shit for it. and you're too young to really understand why #and then your mom gets shown up by her younger sister which only makes things WORSE for all of you #and then said younger sister makes a mistake and disappears with no explanation #and your dad takes you away from everything you've ever known. and your mom is so broken and angry that she doesn't even fight it #nor make any effort to reunite with either of you again. and at this point. in a world that hates you and has cast you aside time and again #all you have is each other. no fucking wonder they went off the rails after that #they are both so desperate for love and agency over their own lives that they'll do ANYTHING to get there #and the collateral damage is an afterthought. GODDDD they make me so unwell i love them so so much

[teeth-draws]

Hhhhighschool au bus ride with trouble from @shepherds-of-haven ;;;; haha

#shepherds of haven #trouble alder #halle beren #if you were wondering why red and the others had such different styles it’s bc this is the missing link #thought I’d try and paint aka no lines! and a background! wild! #anyway in a hs au where their respective single parents are alive #trouble is supported and thriving as the king of social butterflies #she is less feral but also less confident and she pines for him night and day #she is positive he can’t be that thick and he just wants to be friends - every time she tries to ask him out he invites a group #hang in there girl #this will all come to a head where she swears off her feelings for him and finally starts dating the guy from her smart girl class #and trouble who has always kinda liked that tall redhead or whatever suddenly wants to crack his head in the door #-what’s he got that I don’t got?- but all the girls just laugh at him so he sulks #what do you mean you’re going to the library with him what about our Tuesday night taco tradition??? bruh #the vibe as always is energetic extrovert x introverted baddie #teenage trouble punches walls and that’s a shame but also can’t be untrue #here ig he’s like 17 and she’s 18?? they both live in the poorer district of the city and she uses his mum’s laundromat #it’s a fixture in the community and part of the reason he’s so nosy and earnestly involved with everyone #her ears are pierced so much to mimic THE halek prince of whom she has a picture of in her locker #she is overthinking which music to play on their shared earphones even though he’s off with the fairies #this is why AirPods suck like the intimacy of earphones is unparalleled it’s all about the lean #anyway no doubt years of on and off infatuation vs his obliviousness culminates in dating someone else and avoidance #until either his dad shows up out of nowhere and he bangs on her door in the rain OR like her dad does something extra depresso #and she goes to him straight away #then there is a dramatic confession at the school festival or something #or his mum whacks him over the head ig and makes him walk her home when it’s still awkward between them and he can’t stand the weird mood #also they were going to be wearing their school bags but I got tired lmao so they’re on the ground while they commute it’s fine #he ate her up though tbh lmao #as usual the tags are nonsensical there is so much moisturiser in my eyes I’ve been writing reports for hours and have met so many weirdos #her phone is the shiny drampa that rotted my brain enough for me to create her in it’s image when I was shiny hunting

[vulturevanity]

Thinking about ScarVi's overarching theme being The Truth Shall Set You Free. I am so normal about this

#spoilers in tags #pokémon #pokemon sv #Arven initially being closed off and not trusting you because he was neglected by his parent and learned to only rely on himself #realizing very early on that being honest is the best chance he has at healing his Mabostiff #but still not opening up about his bigger issues until it was absolutely necessary which pushes the story forward into endgame #Penny hiding herself behind Cassiopeia to protect herself from bullying #getting an entire group of outcast kids into a team to scare their bullies off #only for the plan to backfire splendously when they're mistaken for the bullies #and Clavell in a rare display of clarity ffrom an adult in a position of authority #rather than simply punishing them for it opted to team up with us to understand what was really going on #and that made him much more lenient in punishing them (because they did still cause trouble!) #the truth of Turo/Sada spiraling into their work and refusing to see the damage it was doing to EVERYTHING including themselves #to the point that they DIED #and the AI they built explicitly for the purpose of continuing their work ran the calculations and realized said work was Bad #and that truth made it go against its own programming which is what kickstarts the main story to begin with #and may I contrast all that with NEMONA whose sheer energy and eagerness is 1000% GENUINE #I've seen so many people say they thought she was going to eventually be angry for losing to us all the time #but the whole point of her character is that she's free to do whatever the fuck she wants and she's pretty happy with her life #she has no reason to fake happiness. she's just like that. she is free from the beginning and she's always be free and that's the point #in a story where no one else is!!! everyone else is bound by some complication or another that holds them back from being honest #i changed my mind i'm insane about this. no longer normal #pokemon sv spoilers #babbles

[dangerous-advantage]

(Image description below 'read more' line.)

[Image ID: A four-by-four alignment chart on a white background with text descriptions to the left and to the top of the squares.

The top left description reads, "seems like they'd be good at parenting." The top right description reads, "seems like they'd be bad at parenting."

Then, from the top down, to the left of the squares, the other set of descriptions reads: "excellent child rearing instincts," and "never trust them with a child in your life."

Each of the four squares contains an image of a different character. At the top left is an image of Lan Wangji of the Mo Dao Zu Shi donghua. He sits between the descriptors "seems like they'd be good at parenting," and "excellent child rearing instincts."

In the top right square sits an image of Wei Wuxian, also of the Mo Dao Zu Shi donghua. He sits between the junction of "seems like they'd be bad at parenting" and "excellent child rearing instincts."

In the bottom left square is an image of Xie Lian from the Tian Guan Ci Fu manhua. He occupies the square with the captions, "seems like they'd be good at parenting" and "never trust them with a child in your life."

Finally, in the bottom left square, sits an image of Hua Cheng from the Tian Guan Ci Fu manhua. He occupies the junction between "seems like they'd be bad at parenting" and "never trust them with a child in your life". /End ID]

#look ok #i see all the cute little fics with xl and hc talking about becoming parents and etc etc #and that's cute! that's adorable!! let them be happy!!! #but. you have to admit ok. hualian need to work through their own problems #like c'mon. xl picks up like AT LEAST three kids in the book and then proceeds to forget about one on his shelf for a while #just kinda. stands judgmentally with his hands on his hips about guzi and qi rong (it's really funny though don't get me wrong) #and after finally re-capturing lang ying he's like 'i'm gonna guardian you!' and then a whole bunch of shit happens and uh well #ly turns out to be the ghost of some kid xl traumatized 800 years ago come back for vengeance (L) #which means xl traumatized him multiple times lmao #we aren't even touching qi rong and lang qianqiu which YES i know the latter wasn't xl's fault and i am fully aware that the situation with #qi rong is and was complicated. BUT. come ON man can these poor kids never catch a break? the one kid he DIDN'T accidentally traumatize #turned out to be obsessively in love with him so like maybe this is for the best? #anyway i also just don't think they'd be... genuinely interested in a commitment like that? like hc would go along with anything xl wants #but he doesn't seem the type to be interested in kids (he's mostly just interested in xl) #xl isn't off the hook either ok #people bring up hc's treatment of e'ming but xl isn't exactly a saint to ruoye. i dont blame the guy he's got a lot on his mind #but he's also very.... absent #plus with the responsibilities of their respective positions all their extra time is like. spent on eachother jk? #this isn't to say xl doesn't *like* kids or anything i just don't think he would want to be a full-time parent lmao #also they DEFINITELY have their own issues with themselves as kids and i'm afraid that might translate into like. parenting #meme #tgcf #mxtx meme #tgcf meme #xie lian #hua cheng #lan wangji #wei wuxian #wei ying #lan zhan

[not-poignant]

PSA

After a miserable few days, which always happens when I get anons that share a facecast or facecasts with me, I'll no longer be responding to any anon facecasts because it's not really about me and there's no real safe way to respond for me and there never has been.

I love when y'all facecast characters and enjoy doing that, it's a type of fandom engagement I hate doing personally and I don't enjoy being asked to engage with, and have said increasingly over the years, but I will always 100% support you doing it for yourself, and think it's great that others get enjoyment out of this.

But I don't. And I'm no longer going to host that part of fandom here.

I've deleted all previous ask responses on facecasting and am going to leave this one up in the tags as my reference in the future.

#housekeeping #facecasting #facecasts #you want to share that stuff make a blog to share it on #or share it with friends #or share it with people who also enjoy facecasting #there's whole sections of fandom just dedicated to facecasting #that i have actively avoided all my life #i have never wanted to turn the anon function off more than i have the last few days #and it's been years since i've felt like turning off anon #y'all can be *pushy* #but all i will ever offer you going forward is silence or a 'it's great that you enjoy doing that' #my job isn't to be a personal validation machine #and *I do not facecast* #which puts me in a really awkward and uncomfortable position #and you know what i've never felt good about replying to a single facecast post of any kind #that has asked me what i think about X name/celebrity/actor/model/athlete #and it's time that i was just really honest about that lol

[amethysttribble]

I have a thought rolling around in my head about how fandom has a very rigid, very bland, very one-dimensional idea of what a ‘good’ parent looks like, and how this vision is entirely fantasy and wish-fulfillment

#like they come off as soooo ‘I wanted my parents to be supportive in everything I did and never get mad ever no matter what’ #and like… that’s not a person doing right by their child that’s an fantasy to make you feel like everything about you is good #you’re imagining robots that pat you on the head and call you good all the time #those aren’t PEOPLE #parents are people #which- and I’m sorry people don’t know this- but you would know if you had a positive healthy relationship with any kind of parental figure #and it gets me cause I think I write feanor as a very positive kind of father #but Ive gotten SO MANY comments going ‘oh I don’t like bad dad fenaor but your stuff-‘ and I’m just like ??? #I don’t write him as a bad dad! I write him as a person! a personality! and not some validation dispensing machine #and even the ‘good’ ‘great’ parents mess their kids up in some ways it’s literally impossible to not have a few hang ups from your parents #it’s about TRYING and TALKING and LOVE tho #not being perfectly accepting of everything no matter what #anyway that’s just what I had to say #new fandom challenge- write interesting parents #Tribble post

[aq2003]

there comes a beautiful time in life where i have to ask myselg th question, "did i accidentally project too hard onto the character that i only relate to a little bit and in doing so hugely missed this one entire aspect/interpretation of the characters . am i stupid"

#ARE THEY STUPID! #dr who #this is about ten specifically his relationship w martha lmao #m being so serious i genuinely did not. see the 'ten was on purpose leading martha on to make her think her feelings were requited' angle #until going out into the wild and reading the tumblr posts. like i genuinely did not. at ALLLLLL. its like a brick hitting my head #bc the ENTIRE time s3 ten came off to me as 'doing stuff w no romantic intent behind it but would consistently get misinterpreted as such' #cuz IIIIIIIII have done this. IIIIIIII have run into this problem before. and it sucks so incredibly bad. #i actually do want to think my og interpretation still holds water cuz like. well i could gather all the evidence but #first one that comes 2 mind would be him going 'it's like when you fancy someone + they dont know you exist' to martha. in episode TWELVE #two routes; either ten is needlessly cruel and callous even after a season's worth of building up trust and friendship w her #or he is on super 'i dont think she has feelings for me and this is a very unhappy coincidence of a line' cocaine #Or the 'she fancied me' line in s4 to donna. either he is disregarding all the good and positive impact she did him. or the fact that this #went over his head the whole time made him look back on that time w discomfort <- I DID THIS. I MIGHT HAVE BEEN PROJECTING #THIS ONTO HIM. AM I STUPID.?.????? #you know how mikage rgu can either be read as an incel or a gay man lost so completely in the sauce #ten is like in this same ballpark. i think. of 'emotionally manipulative and disrespects women' or 'aroacespec and missed the cues' #funniest possible options to pick from. ten my brother how did you set yourself up like this #absolutely not denying that he was toxic and unhealthy during s3 in like 500 ways btw. but well. ths is the one concwpt that #flew over my head. so completely. and i can kind of see it now but i also still find it hard to incorporate into my belief system #bc its like. brother I'M aroace and missed the cues too lol #tangential note we can trace many problems down to a writer's room filled w white people not giving #martha's character the respect/agency she deserves for the existing narrative she has. bc they pulled this w mickey too both in series 1+2 #if they wanted to portray ten as manipulative then him and martha should've been given more screentime #together where martha (or anyone else) calls him the FUCK out on this. and ten would need to suffer narrative consequences of doing smth #as fucked up as that rather than his happy stable dynamic he has w donna. if they wanted to portray him as oblivious then marthas character #shouldn't have constantly been boiled down to an unrequited crush (particularly her dialogue in the s3 finale - there's a LOT more reasons #why she would choose to leave/why their dynamic was unhealthy besides ten not returning her feelings) #if you read all these tags you may be entitled 2 financial compensation #ten and martha #aspec doc tag

[brittlebutch]

Desperately trying to make sense of Alex's motivations in Season Two and you know, I do eventually have to wonder if maybe Alex wasn't actually lying in the majority of those tapes.

Like, we tend to assume that Alex's motivations have been a consistent throughline since the college years, but do we actually know that that's the case? Do we know for sure that Alex was acting in deliberate, calculated ways in 2006; or could it be that he's telling the Truth on those olds tapes when he says he's blacking out and can't remember what's happening to anyone? After all, if we're assuming that Season 2 Alex's motivations are the exact same as his motives in Season 3, then it doesn't make any sense at all that he spend months working with Jay to try to find Amy; Season 3 Alex would have attempted to kill Jay like, on sight just to get things over with as quickly as possible and contain the spread of contamination as best as he could.

But, maybe, if Alex really had been separated from Amy after the events of the 04-04-10 tape, and if he really doesn't know where she is, then maybe that could make things start to make more sense. Maybe he really had been watching Jay's channel, and seeing Jay start going through the same things he went through in college without things devolving into violence and disappearances, and wondered if things maybe could play out differently this time. Maybe he really did send that tape to Jay to ask him for help, maybe he really was just trying to find Amy.

But then, instead of actually being helpful, Jay makes it extremely clear that he's a lot more interested in stalking Alex than he is in finding Amy. Alex asked for help, and instead there's a bunch of masked dudes on Jay's heels that keep attacking him, Jay is breaking into his house, stealing his things, leading the Operator right to him all over again, keeps trying to get other people (namely: Jessica -- if Alex is being honest when he says that his call reassuring her that Amy had been found was an effort to make Sure she stayed away from everything that was happening) involved; and instead of anything getting better, instead of anyone finding Amy, things are just getting worse all over again.

It's not until after the incident at the tunnel that things seem to start rapidly devolving. Rather than a calculated attempt to finally follow through with his need to curb the spread of contamination, this is very clearly an outburst of rage and terror. Alex's "I told you not to follow me" line in conjunction with Jay speculating that Alex didn't know who that guy was, to me, pretty firmly seems to speak to Alex having mistaken that stranger for Jay. From his point of view, Alex knows that Jay and totheark know where he live, have broken in before, he suspects that Jay stole a key to make it easier to get into his house, and he's been followed on the daily for months -- Alex is sitting at the tunnel because he doesn't know where else he can go without being constantly surveilled, hunted, and assaulted. And instead of getting a moment by himself to breathe, Jay followed him out there all over again (it feels like Alex looks directly at the camera in Jay's footage of him from this day; he knew for a fact that Jay was there), and then to make matters worse now 'Jay' won't even keep his distance anymore.

So Alex lashes out. And it's not until afterwards that he looks down and finally recognizes that this wasn't Jay -- it was someone completely innocent. Things have finally reached the low point he was at in college all over again; maybe even worse this time. If Alex doesn't remember attacking anyone in college, but he was at least partially conscious of it this time, then things have reached an entirely new rock bottom, they've reached an absolute point of no return.

He has no idea what happened to Amy, and he's spent months trying to find her with no hint of where she could be; he doesn't know where Jay actually is or what additional trouble he could be causing at this point; he does know that now innocent people are getting caught in the crossfire (in regards to the stranger in the tunnel, and also Jessica now that Jay has her phone number, and the untold number of people Jay got involved when he started posting videos to the Marble Hornets channel); things are spiraling out of control and there's no one left to ask for help. The situation isn't getting better, it's getting worse; things aren't getting easier to handle, they're just getting more out of hand; the negative impact is spreading and who knows how much further it can still go?

So, Alex decides to go scorched earth. He disfigures the body with the rock either to hide evidence or to make sure the guy would actually stay dead and not just get back up to start his own cycle of contamination in a few years. He tries to give Jay one last chance to back off, and Jay instead admits he's been talking to Jessica, acts obstinate and lies about not having Alex's spare key, and then breaks into Alex's house a second time (minimum). If Alex doesn't stop him now, who will? Alex met with Jay planning to kill the others, and then himself, so he could put a stop to this once and for all and keep things from getting any worse than they already were.

Maybe it makes a lot more sense if, rather than being a strangely incomprehensible detour on what should have been a straight path, the events of Season Two were the breaking point that put Alex on that path to begin with.

#N posts stuff #idk!!! I've been thinking a lot lately about the tendency to take Characters at Face Value; when they tell us things we tend to #automatically believe them despite what evidence we might have to the contrary. & like when it comes to deciphering what #went down during the college film project it's mostly totheark that posits that Alex was Definitely Lying and Definitely Acting on Purpose #(even Jay is largely ambivalent - wondering which way it leans and basically saying it could go either way) #but. do we KNOW that they know that? Do we Know that they're Right when they claim that? Or are they just Assuming based off #of their own rage and animosity towards Alex due to what happened? Do we Know for Sure that Alex Was Lying in s1? #i don't know if we do!! And so without Knowing that for sure; how can we speak to Alex's motivations in season one OR season two? #now TO BE CLEAR: I am not saying this in an attempt to claim that Alex is somehow completely innocent of all guilt and that like. #Jay is the 'Real Antagonist' of the series - not at all my intention. this is just More of my usual 'look. Everyone in this series is #all kinds of Morally Grey; no recurring character in this series is free of guilt they ALL have unique fatal flaws & trends towards #antagonism that makes things worse and dooms them all' shtick - a la 'everyone Thinks they're doing the Right Thing but No One Is' #BUT i Am wondering if this Does help to like. clear up some of the ambiguity/uncertainty of Season Two - and even Season One - and #lets the series as a whole read a little bit clearer? idk i know that Jay does Claim to think that Alex was bullshitting him #the whole time & was Actually planning on tying up loose ends the whole time but AGAIN it doesn't make Sense he'd wait so long #idk - Am i making sense? does any of this track? i'm trying to figure it out; i am open to comments on the subject to help #i haven't rewatched season 3 yet today and so maybe there's stuff in there that contradicts this whole theory lmao but i'm taking a break #and just posting this anyway; we'll see what happens lol #marble hornets #mh lb

[so-called-quail]

'Trapped in the end!' said Sam bitterly, his anger rising again above weariness and despair. 'Gnats in a net. May the curse of Faramir bite that Gollum and bite him quick!' 'That would not help us now,' said Frodo.

Sword in hand Sam went after him. For the moment he had forgotten everything else but the red fury in his brain and the desire to kill Gollum. But before he could overtake him, Gollum was gone. Then as the dark hole stood before him and the stench came out to meet him, like a clap of thunder the thought of Frodo and the monster smote upon Sam's mind.

Now he tried to find strength to tear himself away and go on a lonely journey – for vengeance. If once he could go, his anger would bear him down all the roads of the world, pursuing, until he had him at last: Gollum. Then Gollum would die in a corner. But that was not what he had set out to do. It would not be worth while to leave his master for that. It would not bring him back. Nothing would.

Sam and vengeance in today's entry

#idk i have Thoughts about this... rambles ahead... #there's an interesting arc here with how sam approaches his feelings of vengeance in this entry #starting with the first quote. frodo's response to sam is so brief and doesn't get much time to sit with all the action going on #but i feel like it speaks volumes #at least in showcasing the different points they stand on #sam centers his resentment and feelings of revenge... he's quick to get frustrated and immediately goes for threatening gollum #meanwhile frodo is focused on getting out. he doesn't have time to nurse anger nor does he want to #it feels like he's advising sam to move past it because he knows it's futile to stay stuck in those feelings #then there's sam's fight with gollum #after days and weeks of building tension from his mistrust towards gollum... this is where the dam finally breaks #sam's been feeding into his resentment for SO LONG it's no wonder he gets into this state of blind fury towards the end #he set himself up to seek vengeance the moment he gets the opportunity #which in some way i'm sure does help him in fending off gollum... that strength had to come from somewhere #but once he's staved him off he continues to fixate that anger on gollum and forgets what he originally set out to do-- protect frodo #and then we're left with the final quote... #it isn't until sam has (perceived to have) lost everything that he is able to come to the conclusion that vengeance won't serve him #...a lesson learned a little too late?? maybe?? no?? it feels cruel to say that #i definitely do not want to take the position that sam was responsible for what happened to frodo #he was pinned in a horribly desperate situation and couldn't do much once gollum attacked #i don't think much would've changed if he hadn't had his moment of fury with chasing gollum #anyways newbie here-- i haven't read anything ahead from here so idk what character arcs await sam #but i'm interested to see if this is later built upon or acknowledged #end of rambles skdfjgkdjsfg #lotr newsletter #lotr newsletter march 13th #EDIT: I forgot to space the quotes out 😭 #not a crime but they can get confusing to read when scrunched together hrnnnn

[mountain-lion-gremlin]

you can still be physically nonhuman if you were awakened to your identity through the internet (like me!)

You can still be physically nonhuman if it takes you a long time to shift

You can still be physically nonhuman if you always knew since you were young

You can still be physically nonhuman if you don't know why you shift or how it works

You can still be physically nonhuman if you believe that there is no way to logically explain your shifts

You can still be physically nonhuman if you believe you cannot change your form from human

You can still be physically nonhuman if you are growing limbs of your creature

You can still be physically nonhuman if you want to look like a hybrid between nonhuman and human

You can still be physically nonhuman if you figure out you are clinical/delusional. (I don't know too much about being clinical so sorry!)

You can still be physically nonhuman if you believe in p-shifting

You can STILL be physically nonhuman if you have multiple different creatures/species

You can still be physically nonhuman if you are a therian, or otherkin

Do what you want forever people!! They are just labels!! There is no set guidelines to be physically nonhuman, do what feels right to you and embrace it!

#physically nonhuman #nonhuman #p-shift #obviously I'm not saying be an asshole online about it #this is a positivity post #because I know being physically nonhuman can feel like everyone wants to invalidate you and your experiences #especially if you came from the shapeshifting community into a larger place on the internet where nobody believes it at all #I've also been mourning slightly how the shapeshifting community is dying off #I feel like less and less people understand what I mean and I feel alone lol #and if they do #most of the time they are complete assholes and give zero fucks about your opinion #I'm so tired lol #of the hatred and trying to make guidelines on how to be physically nonhuman #just saw someone recently who accepts p-shifters #BUT they have to be this and that and whatever #ugh #mountain lion.txt #nonhuman community #non human #like it's not that hard to go “okay you believe that and went through that” #“that's pretty cool tell me more” #maybe I'm being a hypocrite idk #I know the shapeshifting community has such a horrible reputation #wish it didn't though #but I understand why #I've seen enough to know the manipulation and abuse people went through because of p-shifting #okay enough rambling in the tags

[mygwenchan]

Badmouthing coworkers in private chats and borrowing money that you're later on giving back (including interest), being in a toxic relationship? Not a crime.

Spreading private information, spreading fake rumors, bullying, stalking, abusing, defaming, blackmailing, coercion? Indeed those are all real crimes.

And some still wonder why there are so many people who defend Build 🤦‍♀️

Btw, looks like he is taking this issue once again to court. I hope he won't settle for an agreement this time. It's clear that certain people need to feel the full force of the law or they'll never stop their slander campaign.

#in a way i wish he'd be as much of an asshole as some people want to make us believe he is #then he'd post his own chat ss (chats always go two ways :3) #and reveal all the jucy little secrets he knows about the people from that company #who knows maybe he'll get angry enough this time #because at some point everyone gets fed up with bullshit like this #:) #build jakapan #now off to more positive things #i'm done being angry #edit: biu's sister bee said 'no negotiations this time' :)

[theygender]

The more I think about it the more I really feel like the recently coined term mesosex might fit me and it's been shared by several intersex education/advocacy blogs I follow now so I know there's support for the term but I'm still like. Scared I would be Intruding™ on intersex issues if I started using it. Like I mean. I'm an afab & (afaik) perisex person with a reproductive disorder that's likely caused by a (non-intersex) hormone imbalance which I'm now essentially having to take feminizing HRT to fix, and as a result I'm now growing tits and undergoing female-pattern fat redistribution at the age of 25 after years of having little to no secondary sex characteristics. I've always identified with intersex issues but now that I'm essentially having to undergo HRT to make my body match my asab that connection to intersex issues feels even stronger. And like that's what the term is for. But my anxiety is still like "but what if you're intruding tho" lol 🙃

#rambling #for the curious the specific disorder is endometriosis and recent research has shown that endo is most likely linked to #estrogen dominance which is where either your body makes too much estrogen OR not enough other hormones (progesterone & testosterone) #and given that the only thing that has helped me at all has been going on full progestin-only treatments #and the fact that everything ive researched about estrogen dominance and low progesterone matches up with my symptoms #it definitely seems like low/no progesterone is the issue for me #(although the docs didnt test my levels beforehand and now i cant get them tested unless i want to go off treatments 🥲) #and like. this progestin treatment has changed my fucking life. legitimately #like it didnt just stop my (pretty severe) endo it also fixed like. all of my physical health issues. stuff i didnt even know was related #dont wanna get off topic talking about my other health issues but. going on progestin has easily been the best health thing to happen to me #but it also feels so fucking weird to be going through the same type of changes that like transfems go through on hrt essentially #as an afab perisex person. its not a bad weird but like its just a strange phenomenon and it would be nice to put words to it i guess? #like im a person who has lived the last 10+ years disabled by a reproductive disorder that prevented my body from developing 'normally' #and now im going through feminizing hrt at the age of 25 to fix my reproductive disorder #thats not exactly like. the normal perisex afab experience lol. but at the same time my specific reproductive disorder and hormone imbalance #dont classify me as intersex (no hyperandrogenism just some mix of too much estrogen/not enough progesterone or testosterone #typical anatomy (afaik) aside from the uterine abnormalities resulting from endometriosis) #and its just. such a weird position to be in. i share a lot of common ground with intersex issues but im not intersex myself #and the whole purpose of mesosex was to create a word for people who arent quite either. 'people who identify with but not as intersex' #and i think that describes me. but also like.... do i count?? 😭 #tmi #request to tag

[scattered-winter]

the sheer amount of angst potential in carmen sandiego is INSANE

like. they’re fighting against a criminal organization that is so secret and covert, literally nobody knows about it (except ACME but they’ve been trying to find them for 20 years and turned up with nothing, so without Carmen’s intervention they probably never would have defeated them), but its roots are in LITERALLY every country. there are canonically VILE operatives that run nations and supercompanies. like. when you really get into it, VILE is ASTRONOMICALLY powerful. and the only people who both know about it and can actively fight against it are a handful of teenagers.

also like. the mindwiping thing??!!? it’s a kid’s show so it wasn’t really explored in depth but the implications are HORRIFYING. if they can wipe someone’s mind, they can completely rewrite a personality, or create sleeper agents left and right. they could kidnap random people off the streets, brainwash them, and then have an army of drones with the drop of a keyword. they manipulate and train their operatives to steal and kill without remorse or hesitation, and honestly the only reason why all the main characters made it through the show alive and unscathed was because of the rating because if it was a tv-14 or tv-ma rating, there’s no way everyone would have survived that shit

#like. god i could go on about this for hours honestly #when you think about the sheer SCALE of vile's reach and how long it must have taken for 4 teenagers to systematically dismantle such a huge #organization #and they had help at the end! they had more allies and even acme helped out a little bit #but for such a long time it was just those 4 kids against the entire fucking world #because that's how far vile's reach was #they literally had their hands in EVERYTHING. #ONE OF THE BIGGEST OPERATIVES WAS ONE OF THE HEADS OF THE BRITISH GOVERNMENT #and i'm SURE roundabout wasn't the only one in positions of power #like. g o d #they were literally 4 kids against the world how fucked up is that #they couldn't trust ANYONE or anything because if they did they were risking each other's lives #and PLAYER #like #if he makes a mistake. if he's a second too slow. if his intel is even just slightly off. his friends die #UGH i just #there's so much angst potential stored in this show and y'all KNOW i'm gonna explore it all because that's what i do best in fandom #anyway not to get emotional about kids shows again. <3 #winter speaks #carmen sandiego