#and i think that describes me. but also like.... do i count?? đ
The more I think about it the more I really feel like the recently coined term mesosex might fit me and it's been shared by several intersex education/advocacy blogs I follow now so I know there's support for the term but I'm still like. Scared I would be Intrudingâą on intersex issues if I started using it. Like I mean. I'm an afab & (afaik) perisex person with a reproductive disorder that's likely caused by a (non-intersex) hormone imbalance which I'm now essentially having to take feminizing HRT to fix, and as a result I'm now growing tits and undergoing female-pattern fat redistribution at the age of 25 after years of having little to no secondary sex characteristics. I've always identified with intersex issues but now that I'm essentially having to undergo HRT to make my body match my asab that connection to intersex issues feels even stronger. And like that's what the term is for. But my anxiety is still like "but what if you're intruding tho" lol đ
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Just the Tip
â Thomas Hewitt x Fem!Reader â
MDNI!!!
Summary: Itâs the 1960s and Luda Mae frowns upon premarital sex like any good Christian woman. You and Tommy are young, hot, and in love but the only problem is that Tommy was raised to wait until marriage and never lets you two go any further than kissing and some groping.
But the devil lives in the hot Texan sun and even God takes a break from the summer heat.
Notes: this is super short, just pure smut, self indulgent Iâm obsessed with big boy Tommy đđđ i swear Iâm working on part 2 of my sister Sinclair fic but Tommy has me in a choke hold and I needed an outlet.
No TW that I can think of other than bad smut and maybe ??? Coercion??? Cause Tommy wants to be a good boy and stop before yâall go too far but you flash him and then heâs absolutely 100% in. A bit of religious stuff, period typical sexism but vaguely. Let me know if I should add anything else and Iâll get right on it. Reader isnât ever referred to using âshe/herâ pronouns but is described as having breasts and does have female genitalia so I tagged it fem reader to be safe
Enjoy!!!
The early morning sun burned, chasing away what little cool air remained of the night before. While the barn shaded you from the unforgiving sun and hid you from disapproving eyes â or lecherous in the case of the older men of the family â it also trapped in the heat your two bodies gave off.
Thomas pressed his open mouth to your own, tongue swiping over your teeth eager to taste you. Your hands gripped his dark hair, ruining any half-effort attempt he had made earlier in the day to smooth down his unruly hair. He held you in his arms, body pressed tightly against him in an attempt to get as close as possible, his large frame hiding you even further from prying eyes than the shadowed corners of the old barn. The kiss was deep and hungry and served as a brief respite from Luda Maes ever watching eyes. While she had been fine with you living with the family before you and Tommy were married, she forbade you from sharing a room or being intimate, a rule she absolutely refused to budge on and one that Uncle Charlie took a strange glee in ribbing you about. But much like the Texan heat, the heated looks you gave each other were unavoidable and only grew hotter as the summer days went on. Luda Mae wanted to wait until the following spring to make your union official but at the rate the town was drying up, there wouldn't even be a priest to officiate the ceremony, much less any guest to attend. You highly doubted anyone outside of the family would want to witness your union anyway but still, Luda Mae didn't want the few who would to get wise and start counting months.
These stolen moments in the barn were as good as you could get â and by god were they good.
Tommyâs large hands groped at your breasts, pawing roughy at your nipples through the worn fabric of your old dress. It wasnât long before you found yourself in the familiar position of being sprawled out on the barn floor, coarse hay a discomfort you had long learned to endure for the sake of pleasure.
You desperately thrust your sex up onto his growing bulge, whining when he groaned and pinned your hips with his own, preventing you from getting your desired stimulation. âPlease Tommy,â you beg, lips separating, âWe donât have to do too much, I just wanna touch you.â You press open-mouthed kisses to his neck, pulling softly at the flesh with your teeth and tongue dragging across the bites to taste the salt on his skin. Your hands eagerly worked to untuck his faded green shirt and wrap around him, roaming the vast expanse of his back. His whole body shuddered in your arms, an attempt to hold back from eating you whole.
You know Thomas will put an end to your romp soon, the tense lines of his shoulders and the way he shuts his eyes a sign that he's reaching his limit, that if you two don't stop now you won't be able to stop â but thatâs exactly what you want.
You're tired of holding back, of this constant edging you have to endure when youâre in his presence and it gets harder every day. Just yesterday afternoon, Uncle Charlie sprayed Tommy with the hose, telling him that he was filthy and needed to get out of those clothes before he went inside. Watching as he undressed by the back door so that you could put his clothes on the line to dry had nearly given you a heatstroke â and if Charlieâs leering grin was any clue, you swear he did it on purpose in an attempt to rile you up. You ran off before you sinned right there in the yard, the memory of Thomas's shirt clinging to his arms, his chest glistening with water had kept you company well into the night.
So before Tommy puts a stop to your roll in the hay you make your move. You lift your dress up past your breast and expose yourself to him, you can see his breath stutter in his chest, this was quickly becoming the farthest you two had ever gone.
âJust watch me, Tommy, watch me,â you say breathlessly.
And he does, he sits on his haunches like a predator, his engorged cock straining against his pants and imagining just a taste has your tongue darting out to wet your lips, his gaze fixated on the movement.
Sliding your panties off your legs, your fingers dip briefly into your wet hole, gathering slick to rub onto your clit. At the very first touch, you let out a shuddering breath and you watch as his shoulders heave.
You begin rubbing your clit at an intense pace already turned on from the earlier heavy petting, not once breaking eye contact with Thomas as you do. With each moan you muffle you see his eyes grow darker with desire breathing with his mouth open as though he could taste your scent in the air. When he finally lets his cock spring free you let out your loudest moan yet. Itâs better than you ever thought. His cock is thick and heavy, drooping slightly under its own weight but still undeniably firm. It curves slightly and you imagine that if it was inside you it would scrape against your walls in a way you've never been able to do with just your fingers.
Thomas grips his cock firmly and gives it a few tugs, eyes alternating between hungrily drinking in the sight of your blissed-out expression and your dripping pussy. You buck your hips, desperate to press your clit against your fingers and Thomas jerks his length even faster, rubbing his tip and spreading his precum on his hand.
God, you wished it was you that was touching him.
Thomas settles onto his knees and after a brief hesitation begins to shuffle closer to you. The sight of him crawling to you on his knees with his dripping length in hand made your pussy clench around nothing and you let out a whimper. You remove your fingers from your clit, feeling the heat radiating from his cock as he settles on top of you, legs spreading around his waist, your hips slightly raised and resting on his thighs.
The tip hesitantly pressed against your clit and your moan fills the small space before you can suppress it. This was better than you were hoping and it felt as though you were pressing against the boundaries the lord had set for you. Tommyâs eyes find yours looking for reassurance, asking without words, âDo you think this is okay?â
You find enough comprehension in your lust-addled brain to come up with a coherent answer, âIt should be fine, I think,â you stammer out, âI mean, itâs not like â not like youâre putting it in so, it should be fine.â
Youâre not overly familiar with the word of God outside of Sunday services and Luda Maeâs lectures, both of which you were forced to attend and spent tuning out in favor of watching the sweat build on Tommyâs brow while he worked through the window.
You think that if God could feel the weight of Thomas like you did, feel the heat like you could, you think heâd forgive the sin of your act.
It seems like that was all the reassurance that Thomas needed because no sooner than the words fumbled their way out of your mouth that he begins to drag the length of his cock against your slit.
God, if this is what hell was supposed to be like, burning and full of decadence, then perhaps you didnât mind being a sinner.
The way he ruts against you is euphoric. Heavy breaths escape you both and you canât help the words that spill from your lips.
âGod, Tommy, I wish you would put it inside me,â you whine out ââwanna feel your fat cock in my pussy, wanna get filled,â you might as well be begging at this point, and Tommy's increases his pace to the point that you think he wants the same thing, that heâs desperate to thrust into you rather than against you and â
And then the tip of his cock catches on your entrance and you both stop breathing.
âMaybe â Maybe it doesnât count.â You stammer out, âIt didnât go in and itâs just the tip, and I donât think that the tip countsâ With the slightest twitch of his hips the tip of his cock has slipped inside.
"It's - it's just the tip it's fineâ Your words sound empty even to you but the reassurance is all Tommy needs to push forward and let the head of his cock slide into your welcoming heat
His soul nearly leaves his body when he feels your raw pussy on the head of his cock. He jerks his length furiously and your fingers begin to move against your clit again, eager to meet your high with Thomas.
But itâs not enough. He was right there, right there just one push of his hips heâd be right where you needed him
âPlease Tommyâ Canting your hips slightly so the tip begins to dig deeper into you, you begin to plead once more, âwanna feel you fill me up, wanna remember the shape of your cock pleaseâ
Thomas feels years of control break at your words and with one swing of his hips, he bottoms out instantly. You feel like you've been punched in the gut as the air rushes out of you and you let out a sound like a wounded animal. Tommy stays still deep inside you, shaking and heaving, absolutely drunk on the feeling of your soaked walls clenching vigorously around his length.
You feel full in a way you've never thought possible. His length throbs, its girth stretching you in a way that burns.
When he finally starts thrusting, youâre not ready. Heâs like a man possessed, solely focused on the feel of you around him, your skin pressed against his, his blood pounding in his ears.
âWaitâ Tommy, ah, slow â slow down, oh god!â You canât hold back your moans and he canât stop, both fully engrossed in the feel of each other with no control over your own lust. Thomas crashes his lips onto yours in a halfhearted attempt to keep down your moans, itâs sloppy, clashing teeth and drooling tongues, spit escaping your lips, unlike any youâve shared before.
This is completely different from what youâve imagined your first time together would be like. Itâs not your wedding night, you're laying on the dirty barn floor and thereâs absolutely nothing gentle about the way Tommy is ravaging you. Your pussy is sopping wet and with every thrust, it lets out an embarrassing squelch, your juices and Tommyâs pre-cum leak down your ass and make a sticky mess in his dark pubes.
He doesnât stop even as your walls spasm around him, cumming on his cock and digging your nails into his strong back. He works you through your orgasm even as your mouth clumsily forms the words to beg for him to slow down or to give you a moment. Itâs too much, the sensations completely overloading your brain and all you can do is hold on tightly to him, lost in the ecstasy of your release.
Thomas lets out a deep, guttural groan as he cums, hips stuttering as he bullies his fat cock into the deepest part of your sex, filling you to the brim and your vision goes white.
Boneless, neither one of you makes a move to separate from the other, so thoroughly satisfied and content to lie where you are holding each other, Thomasâs softening cocking slipping out of you and spilling his release onto the ground.
His weight on you is comforting, you gently press kisses to his face and bask in the way his heavy breaths caress your sweaty skin.
âI love you.â You whisper into the shell of his ear and he squeezes you against him, repeating the words in his garbled voice the best he could. Your love is just for the two of you, no one else had a place in your world, no one else had the right to peak in on your affection or gawk at your differences.
This moment in time was just for the two of you.
âThomas! Where the hell are ya, boy!â
Well, until Uncle Charlieâs voice brought you back down to reality.
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â THROWN TO THE WOLVES (IX)
PART ONE || PART TWO || PART THREE
PART FOUR || PART FIVE || PART SIX
PART SEVEN || PART EIGHT || PART TEN
PAIRING â Na-Baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x fem!Reader // Atreides!OC
SUMMARY â Feyd-Rautha focuses on bringing back the spice production to full efficency while his wife plots against The Baron. The ghosts of her past are haunting her in the Arrakeen Palace where her family lived and died.
AUTHORâS NOTE â Itâs written as an usual x Reader fic without describing anything about the Readerâs looks but I still classified it as an OC as well since she is Paul Atreidesâ half-sister. This chapter is quite long so I think the next one will be the last...? Of course I am open to write some additional chapters with these characters in the future đ Thank you everyone supporting my work đđ»đ I don't know when I'll post the next / last chapter. Next week I hope but it might take me more time than usual because I have to catch up with uni work finally lol
WARNINGS â arranged marriage, mentions of sexual activities (no actual smut), violent behaviour, death
WORD COUNT â 8,170
ENGLISH IS MY SECOND LANGUAGE.
THROWN TO THE WOLVES (IX)
Feyd-Rautha was barely able to hide his excitement on that day. Becoming the Governor of Arrakis was a huge deal â not only it proved that he was his uncleâs worthy successor if he was given such responsibility, but also Arrakis remained the most important planet under the Harkonnen rule due to the spice resources. Controlling this planet was like controlling the universe.
Before the official ceremony would begin, he had to deal with the formalities, all dressed up in the accurate black leather attire and pride on his face. Then his wife entered the throne room accompanied by the guards and from that moment he could only focus on her.
Her black leather dressâ design was mimicking his uniformâs one and her face was hidden by the veil made of chains and gemstones. She walked past him and bowed down in front of his uncle. Feyd knew that was the custom but it still made him clench his jaw and blood boil.
She straightened herself and fixed her dress on her abdomen as it was getting too tight in that area. Feyd smirked at the sight of her womb getting visibly swollen with his child. With his heir.
His wife signed the contract about him becoming the new Governor of Arrakis as the Atreides signet ring sparkled on her pinky finger. The truth was, her signature was not required there at all but the Baron loved to humiliate her in this way. However, she managed to do it with such dignity. Feyd wondered if she still felt like an Atreides. That signet ring wasnât leaving her pinky finger at all ever since it had been adjusted to her size.
He wondered if it was a symbol of power for her or did she keep it for sentimental reasons.
Sentiment. That word was new in Feyd-Rauthaâs dictionary. But now, when he watched his wife standing behind him with her hands clasped on her womb, he swore he could feel it.
He couldnât explain most of the things happening inside his body at the sight of her. It was more than plain desire or sexual attraction. In fact, he had had lovers more adventurous than her and surely more experienced. But he had never met a woman like that.
She made him think of his mother, especially now, when she was expecting his child. He wondered what kind of mother she would be. Would she⊠love⊠his son? Or would he be another pawn in her court games�
His mother was cold and distant but only recently Feyd had realised it was no reason to kill her. Was it possible that some part of him regretted it? His uncle had manipulated him into doing something he couldnât truly understand back in the day â an act impossible to undo and sealing his murderous fate.
But even his mother had never touched him so gently like his wife. And he knew that it was weak to crave that but he did â he craved more from her and her only. He would kill anyone looking at her the wrong way but she could disrespect him in any way and heâd still be on his knees for her. He had never been as obedient to his uncle. He had feared him as a little boy and then he had hated him, waiting for his turn on the Harkonnen throne. The obedience to his wife was dictated by admiration and⊠sentiment.
Yes, that was a new word in his dictionary.
And his harpies⊠Well, he had been attached to them but killing them had felt cold â he hadn't even felt sorry.
The room slowly filled with people who were to witness his nomination for the Governor of Arrakis. Feyd stood proudly and already imagined the day he would be nominated The Baron Harkonnen.
And when his uncle officially named him the Governor, Feyd grabbed his face and brought it down for an angry kiss that was a mockery of gratitude. In that kiss there was a promise of the upcoming succession of the much more important title. In that kiss there was the Harkonnen poison and everyone cheered but the Baron knew.
He knew.
You were laying on your bed on the ship inside your cabin and playing with the Atreides signet ring on your pinky finger. It felt surreal to realise that under different circumstances you would had made the same journey a few months earlier with your family when your father had been gifted Arrakis.
Your stream of thoughts was interrupted abruptly by Feyd walking inside the cabin.
âApparently, Rabban has no idea we are coming,â he announced with a smirk and sat on the bed next to you, waiting for your approval like a little boy after telling his mother exciting news.
âWhy do you hate him so?â You only asked and his smirk dropped in an instant. âIs he not your brother?â
âDo you love yours?â Feyd tilted his head a little as he watched you carefully.
âIt doesnât matter anymore,â you smiled sadly at him and caressed your bump. âHe is dead and so is his older sister. But in that relationship, I was Rabban and Paul was you.â
âI am better than Rabban. He means nothing,â Feyd shrugged his arms, visibly annoyed at the fact that you scolded him and started asking questions instead of sharing his excitement.
âDo you think you will catch a tan on Arrakis?â You changed the subject and chuckled at the confused glance he gave you.
âIâm not going there for vacation,â he moved closer to you on the bed and placed his hand on your womb. You felt its warmth spreading all over your body. âAnd neither are you,â he reminded you.
âI know.â
âThe medic says that the Arrakis might do you good. The sun and all,â Feyd explained, a bit awkwardly.
âYes, I know. But it is also not a very pleasant environment. It is hot and dry,â you sighed. âAnd full of spice.â
âYou will have everything you want and need there, my Baroness,â Feyd leaned in to suck on your neck â his idea of a romantic kiss. You leaned back and sighed at the pleasure.
âHow big do you think he is now?â You caressed your husbandâs hand gently and he moved away from the crook of your neck to look into your eyes. âOur son. Do you think he is still smaller than your hand?â You bit on your lower lip. âI like to imagine him so little that your hand covers him whole when you place it on my womb.â
âDo you think of him often?â Feyd asked and you furrowed your brows at his question.
âOf our son?â You wanted to make sure and he nodded. âAll the time,â you answered with all honesty. âAnd youâŠ?â You asked, carefully.
âAll the time,â Feyd nodded and looked down at his hand caressing your bump.
âAnd what do you think?â You were scared to know the answer but you needed to know it.
âIâm proud to have a son. He will be the Baron one day and I will train his body to become even stronger than mine. And you will train his mind to be sharp like yours,â Feyd looked at you. He was serious but you chuckled at that as you caressed his cheek with your thumb.
âJust promise me that you wonât do to him what has been done to you,â you whispered as the smile disappeared from your face. âPlease,â you pleaded.
âIt has to be done,â was all he said as his jaw clenched.
âNo, it doesnât,â you shook your head. You could feel the tears forming in your eyes. Thinking of what your husband had gone through was painful enough but imagining your son going through the same thing was even worse.
âHow else do you want him to be a great warrior?â Feyd laughed at you. âHe will need discipline.â
âDiscipline does not have to mean abuse. I want him to follow your steps out of admiration and respect. Do you want your own son to feel the same way towards you that you feel towards your uncle?â You raised an eyebrow at him. âDo you want your son to plot how to get rid of you? To wait impatiently for you to finally die and rot?â
âNo, I do not,â he admitted after a short while of hesitation.
âThen we will do it my way,â you stated.
âI donât want my children to be weaklings,â Feyd drawled as his hand squeezed your womb possessively.
âNeither do I,â you assured him. âAnd it insults me greatly that you think that I would raise them to be weak. I hate weakness,â you gave him a stern look.
âThereâs your answer why I hate my brother,â he said and moved down to lay his head on your womb. You carefully caressed his temples in a soothing manner.
You still had to play little games with him sometimes, you assumed it would always be like this one way or another. But you loved him. Yes, you loved him.
Princess Atreides would rather die than admit that. For the Harkonnen na-baroness it was difficult to admit her feelings, too. But you didnât mind giving up and finally allowing yourself to confess the truth. It was making you feel less lonely in the world. Perhaps it was love dictated by the fact you had no one else around. Perhaps you loved the way he worshipped you. Perhaps you loved him for the way he was making you feel so powerful and important. But at the end of the day, it was love. Not that you planned to say it out loud.
It was true that you hated weakness but Feyd-Rautha was yours. If he was to die, youâd die, too. You had no home to go to, no family member to turn to. All you had was him. Him and the dream of the life you two were supposed to live one day.
You knew that the black colour was a bad choice for the planet like Arrakis. But you couldnât imagine wearing anything else. As a Harkonnen you had to establish dominance in your Houseâs way. Your arrival dress had to be black and made of a flowy material with a semi-transparent veil to protect your skin from the hot rays of sunshine and the wind full of harsh sand and spice.
The very first step you took outside the ship nearly made you dizzy. It felt so odd after so many months to feel the sunlight on your skin and to see the colours while not being inside any building â even if the colours of Arrakis were not many.
âMy Lady,â Astra and Cara followed you outside, both widening their big, black Harkonnen eyes at the sight of the desert, âare you alright?â
âYes, my girls, I am,â you held their hands.
âLetâs go inside, na-baroness,â the medic joined you. âAt this time of the day it is recommended not to go out,â he explained and you nodded before following him with your girls, guards and all the servants carrying your things. Feyd was already inside the palace with his uncle and dealing with an embarrassed and humiliated Rabban.
You looked up through your veil and examined the sight of the building in front of you. It was not much cosier than the Harkonnen fortress on Giedi Prime. On the inside the design was raw as well, but some part of you was already used to such an environment.
âMy Lady,â one of the servants approached you. He had already been living there for quite some time now as he had come to Arrakis with Count Rabban. âShall we prepare the rooms for you and na-baron or will you take the room that belonged to the previous Duke? Count Rabban did not take it, therefore we left it untouched,â he informed you and you froze for a second.
âMy fatherâs room? It is left untouched?â You gasped.
âYes, my Lady na-baroness, Duchess Atreides,â the man was bowing down so low you became concerned about his spine.
âEnough of the titles, take me there,â you ordered and then you turned around at your servants. âWait here. I will let you know what room I am taking.â
âMy Lady,â they all nodded as you followed the man alone. You didnât want even Astra and Cara around you because you couldnât tell what your reaction to your fatherâs chambers would be.
âBehind that door, na-baroness,â the servant bowed down and pointed at the doors. You pushed them and let them close behind you as your body trembled at the sight. You lifted the veil off of your face and looked around.
The room was arranged in a similar way as your fatherâs chamber back on Caladan. Duke Leto hated any form of mess and he had everything always put in its place. You wandered around and touched all the personal belongings â his chair, his desk⊠You froze at the sight of the pictures he had there. One picture was of him and Lady Jessica, the other one was of you and Paul. There was even a tiny picture from his wedding day with your mother. You remembered that picture very well as you had once asked him about it. He had told you he kept it out of respect for her and for you.
You had no idea he would still keep it even if you werenât around.
You opened the desk. Someone had been rummaging inside â most likely to take the jewellery and the important documents. But the personal letters stayed. Personal letters and⊠a small doll.
You had given it to him at the age of four and asked him to take care of it. You didnât expect he had been keeping it all these years.
âOh, fatherâŠâ you whispered and brought the doll close to your heart. âOne day, it will be my daughterâs,â you decided and were about to walk away from the desk when you spotted an unfinished letter.
Carefully and curiously, you picked the paper up and read the few sentences that he had written down before taking a break and never being able to go back to it again.
Dear Daughter,
I am aware of the anger and all the resentment you must be holding in your heart towards me. I am not asking for much but please, write back to us. If not for me, then do it for Paul. We both miss you dearly and we are worried when you are not answering our letters personally. All we want to know is if you are safe andâŠ
Your eyes widened and your heart skipped a beat. So, they had been writing to you. All this time... And only Baron Harkonnen knew how many letters had been kept away from you. Of course he had lied to you. How could you be so stupid�
You clenched your fist and then threw the crumpled paper back into the drawer. It didnât change anything now. It brought you some peace, deep down, but it didnât mean anything anymore. It wouldn't take back time.
You approached your fatherâs bed and spotted a robe laying there, discarded. He would wear that over his nightwear when he was leaving the room in the middle of the night due to an emergency. You assumed that the Harkonnen invasion was an emergency so sudden and violent that he had no time to put it on.
The robe was silk and dark green with the Atreides emblem on the chest. You sat on the edge of the bed and put the doll down on your lap before taking the robe in your hands and squeezing it as you brought it to your face. It still faintly smelled like him. It smelled like your father.
You buried your face in the silk and closed your eyes, remembering his embrace. For a short while it was almost as if he was still there, holding you and telling you it would be alright.
But it wasnât alright. It hadnât been alright and his daughter had died. You couldnât tell when it happened exactly. Had Princess Atreides die in that cell on the night before her wedding? Or when she had been locked up after the Baron had told her about going to Arrakis and killing her family? Or maybe she had died somewhere in the meantime. Perhaps when she had seen Feyd taking an innocent life for the first time. It was really hard to tell but she was definitely gone now.
You startled at the sound of someone entering the room without knocking. It was Feyd â no one else would dare to do that.
âIâve been looking for you,â he said and froze at the sight of you holding your fatherâs robe. âAre you alright?â
âYes,â you stood up and threw the robe on the floor as you picked the doll up. âBurn it,â you ordered. âAnd weâll take a different room. They can clean up this one,â you approached him and handed him the doll in your hands. He took it, confused.
âWhat is this?â He asked.
âOur next child will be a daughter and you will give it to her when she is born,â you told him sternly.
He snorted at first but then he realised that you had been dead serious. The doll held lots of significance and meaning to you and he didnât even have any idea how much you trusted him with it.
Feyd nodded his head after a long while and he looked down at the doll, awkwardly holding her in his pale hands.
âMy Lady, what is your decision?â The servant knocked upon the door and joined you.
âI donât want this room, clean it up,â you told him.
âDo you want a room next to your husbandâs, na-baroness?â He asked.
âNo, we will share one room,â you told him and he bowed down before leaving you quietly. âUnless you want your own,â you laid your eyes on Feyd.
âI want what you want.â
You were walking through the endless desert. It was like the oceans back on Caladan but instead of the water there was sand. The heat did not bother you and you did not feel tired at all. However, all this walking seemed pointless. You didnât know where you were or where to go.
And then you spotted someone on the horizon. A tiny figure in a stillsuit and your heart skipped a beat. Was it one of the Fremen? You didnât want to find out but your legs kept walking anyway as if you had no control over your body.
The figure remained motionless. After a while you spotted it was a man. You wondered why he was not reacting at all, seeing you walking towards him. Perhaps he was waiting for you. But why?
When you were close enough to see his face, you gasped. It was your brother, Paul Atreides, with his eyes blue from the spice, wearing a Fremen armour and he seemed to stare in the distance. Now you realised that he couldnât see you even though you were facing him.
âPaul?â You asked as your body stopped walking with your face inches away from his. âBrother?â
He startled a little and furrowed his brows. Did he hear you�
âPaul,â you said again and his eyes found yours.
âSister,â his voice was different now. It was rough and held no affection. It made your blood run cold.
âWhat are we doing here?â You asked sadly. âLetâs go back home.â
âWhat is home now?â
âCaladan,â you explained.
âWe cannot.â
You woke up abruptly and sat up, breathing heavily as you felt the sweat running down your spine and forehead. You had never experienced a dream so vivid and realistic as this one.
You assumed it was because of Arrakis. The heat could cause such a vision or perhaps it was all that buried deep down grief after losing your family. Being here now, in that palace where they had lived and died, it was making you feel odd.
Feyd woke up as well and you heard him reaching out for the knife underneath his pillow.
âItâs alright,â you told him. âIâve just had a bad dream.â
âItâs your first night on Arrakis. Maybe itâs the spice messing with your head,â you felt his hand rubbing your back. âLay down, come to me,â he whispered and you did.
You laid your head on his chest and hugged him tight like a scared child. Your heart was pounding and you felt dizzy. But you didnât want to tell your husband what the dream was. He didnât ask anyway.
On the next day you were gathered in a conference room. Everyone was there, the Baron and Count Rabban, too. You hoped that they would go back to Giedi Prime but it seemed like they wanted to stay and ensure that the spice production would go back to normal. You tried not to make a face at that as you watched the hologram globe of Arrakis in front of you on display.
âShouldnât the Fremen delegation greet the new Governor of Arrakis?â You asked.
âThe Fremen do not have negotiations with us anymore. We are in the state of war, na-baroness,â one of the engineers answered you with a nod of his head.
âLet it be war, then,â you nodded back.
âWhat is causing the biggest problems?â Your husband asked as he gave his brother a contemptuous look. âApart from the bad governing of the resources.â
âThe Fremen have a new leader, a mysterious MuadâDib,â The Baron explained and for some reason a shiver went down your spine at the mention of the name. You didnât know why because it didnât sound sinister or dangerous.
âAnd what about him?â Feyd asked. You could hear he was bored of the meeting and wanted real action as soon as possible.
âThey are destroying our machinery and killing our soldiers, slowing down the production. He is unstoppable. Like a shadow,â Rabban explained and Feyd snorted at him.
âMy big scary brother failed to deal with one Fremen savage,â he drawled. âInstead of slaughtering them all.â
âAnd what would our Baroness do?â The Baron interrupted Feyd and stared at you with a smirk. Suddenly, the whole room laid their eyes on you and you blinked a few times, surprised.
âWhy would you ask a woman that?â Rabban inquired and Feyd hissed at him for that remark.
âBecause I want to know her insight. Our Baroness happens to have interesting ideas,â Baron teased, his squinted eyes never leaving yours.
âI would oppose slaughtering the Fremen,â you stated.
âIâve told you, sheâs just a woman,â Rabban laughed.
âShe is the Governess of Arrakis and your na-baroness and you will respect her,â Feyd barked.
âEnough!â You banged the fist on the table and the sound echoed through the chamber full of the Harkonnen servants and engineers widening their eyes at you. âBoth of you!â You snapped. âActing like children,â you scolded. âI am not the Governess of Arrakis, Feyd,â you laid your eyes on him and he looked a bit taken aback by your outburst. âThat title does not work that way. Youâre the Governor and I am your wife. However,â you looked at the Baron again. He was smirking all that time. âI do not think slaughtering them will bring us profit. They know the desert and the spice more than we do. We need them as obedient allies. But in order to have them as allies, we have to defeat them and their will to fight. We need to hit them with aggression that they have not yet seen nor experienced in their worst nightmares,â you raised your chin up.
âAnd that aggression is Feyd-Rautha,â Baron nodded at your husband.
âIf we have negotiations with the Fremen in the future, Iâd like to be there,â you announced and Rabban snorted. You knew that he did not mean these things personally, he was just frustrated that he was being replaced by his brother and seeing that an off-world woman was holding more influence than him had to be rough for his ego.
âWhatâs so funny, brother?â Feyd asked him and you rolled your eyes. They were at it again. âThe only thing I find funny is how my wife has more brains than you.â
âAnd why is that funny?â You asked him, irritated.
âThat is enough indeed,â Baron raised his hand. âWe all have better things to do,â he announced and everyone bowed their heads as he left the room.
You watched your husband and his brother leaving right behind him, still having an argument like little children. Then you took a deep breath in and stood up to go back to Astra and Cara.
However, when you left the room, Feyd grabbed his brotherâs neck and pushed him down on the floor. He basically threw him at your feet and you were surprised that he had managed it so easily since Rabban was a big and strong man.
âYou will kiss her shoe and show your na-baroness respect,â Feyd ordered, âas you beg for her forgiveness.â
You looked down as Rabban looked up, scared. As much as it brought you some satisfaction to have a big, strong Harkonnen count who was called Beast Rabban at your feet, you felt sorry for him, too.Â
âFeyd, there is no need,â you looked at your husband.
âNo, there is, because I say so,â he insisted and kicked his brotherâs head. âHe will kiss your shoe or die.â
âI said, there is no need,â you repeated, more sternly this time. âYour brother is not my enemy like he is not yours either,â you pointed out. âStand up, Count Rabban,â you ordered the man.
Carefully and hesitantly he moved up, trying to avoid looking into your eyes.
âYou shall remember the kindness I have given you,â you told him and he nodded. âNow, leave.â
You watched him walk away as fast as possible and then you looked at your husband. He wasnât pleased but he was trying to hide it. You could tell when he was angry very easily from his facial expressions by now.
âDo not torment him. He might be useful,â you told him.
âHe will do anything to keep his pathetic head on. Heâs got no honour,â Feyd snorted at that. âHe would kiss anyoneâs shoe if his life depended on it.â
âThen he is more like me than I have expected,â you only said and walked past him, leaving him behind, surprised.
âYou are not like him,â Feyd followed you as he grabbed your wrist. âYou have honour.â
âDo I?â You chuckled and turned around to face him. âI did everything to survive. It had nothing to do with honour. I became a Harkonnen instead of doing what my Atreides pride was telling me to do and that was to kill myself before letting any of you hurt me or change me.â
âIt is different,â he was trying to deny your words. You were confusing him now.
âYou also do not have honour, Feyd-Rautha. The way you used to fight drugged warriors in the arena. It has nothing to do with honour,â you reminded him as his jaw clenched. âAnd you know what? I donât care,â you shrugged your arms. âMy father, he was an honourable man. And look where it has gotten him. We are too cunning for honour.â
âWe?â Feyd asked.
âThe Harkonnens,â you explained and cupped his face to pull his head down and place a kiss upon his forehead. âNow, go, werenât you supposed to terrorise the poor Fremen?â
He smirked at you and leaned in to place a hungry kiss upon your lips as his hand caressed your womb.
âBe careful, my darling, come back to me in one piece from the treacherous desert,â you bid him farewell and kissed him one last time before going back to your chambers.
Weeks had passed and the mysterious MuadâDib remained uncaught, however the spice production came back to full efficiency. It was difficult to celebrate such victory, though, because you werenât even sure if it was because of Feyd-Rautha being a good Governor or was it because of his uncle who still was present on Arrakis. Both him and Rabban. You wondered how things had been back on Giedi Prime â especially now, when all the important Harkonnens were on Arrakis.
You had your girls and your medic and much less nosy guards following you everywhere. The Arrakeen Palace was giving you lots of freedom and safety but it was also a much more boring place than the fortress on Giedi Prime. It was full of ghosts, too â you couldnât stop thinking your family had been slayed in that very place.
You kept dreaming of Paul each and every night. It was making you feel weary and frustrated at this point. You didnât want Feyd to know so you often would leave the bed quietly in the middle of the night and walk outside to sit on the balcony. There was something fascinating about the desert; it was so calm yet dangerous. By day it was too hot to just stare and admire but at night it was peaceful and with no one around to bother you.
Tonight you were standing and admiring the moon in your nightgown, with your hand caressing your swollen womb. It was getting bigger and bigger each day and you could feel the child move now. The medic assured you he was placed properly and growing healthy. You wondered if your son would be born on Arrakis.
âWhatâs wrong?â Feydâs voice made you turn around. He was standing by the entrance to the balcony and staring at you.
âI canât sleep,â you lied. You could but you didnât want to. You didnât want to dream of Paul.
âAgain?â Feyd sighed and approached you. He stood behind you and leaned your body on his chest. It made you sigh out of relief and he placed his hands on your abdomen. âPerhaps the spice is doing you harm.â
âNo, the medic would have noticed that,â you shook your head. âPerhaps itâs your son keeping me awake,â you made up a believable excuse and Feyd chuckled.
âAnd what are you doing here? Staring at the sand?â
âI donât expect you to understand the beauty of the desert,â you teased. âBut yes, the sand, the moon, everything.â
âWhen I will become the Baron, we will have a little tour and visit every planet under Harkonnen rule,â he whispered into your ear. âYou will see many beautiful things, my darling pet.â
âAnd when will that be?â You snapped, frustrated. âIn ten years? A hundred?â You snorted.
âWhat are you talking about?â Feyd took a step back and leaned on the railing to take a better look at your face but you remained staring in the distance.
âWhat is he still doing here? I thought Arrakis was ours. Yet, he is here and it feels as if we are being supervised. Meanwhile, Giedi Prime remains without protection,â you drawled through gritted teeth.
âIf you were him, would you leave us two to each other?â Feyd asked.
âAre you by his side again?â You finally looked at him, angrily. âHe gave you the planet to govern and youâre defending him again?â
âI am not defending him,â Feyd got angry, too, at your words. âBut it is obvious why he stayed here. He knows we might be plotting. He needs to keep an eye on things.â
âI have already plotted,â you lowered your voice and went back to staring at the moon.
Feyd kept looking at you in silence for a while before he finally spoke up again.
âAnd what is that?â
âHe shall be slayed by night alongside most of the guards and servants. We will say it was a nighttime assassination attack by MuadâDib and his people. They targeted the Harkonnen nobility and you were too busy saving your pregnant wife to help your uncle,â you whispered.
âEveryone will know the truth, it's too obvious,â Feyd told you. âIt's only giving us an alibi for those who want to believe in it.â
âOf course they will suspect what really happened but they will not care. You showed them your worth in the arena and you brought back the full efficiency of the spice production. The Harkonnen lords will give you a chance. I am sure theyâve already grown tired and weary of the Baron,â you kept convincing him.
âWhat if MuadâDib suddenly decides to show up and deny?â
You sighed and looked at him again, furiously.
âJust admit that you donât want him dead, because in some way I cannot understand⊠you love him,â you hissed at him.
âLove?â It was the first time you heard him use that word and it brought a chill down your spine. It sounded so off and scary when your husband said it out loud. âI donât know what that pathetic feeling is,â he assured you.
âI can see that,â you raised an eyebrow at him and walked away to leave the balcony and go back to your bedroom.
You were hurt, angry and frustrated and it was starting to bring tears to your eyes but you didnât want him to see that.
Your husband followed you to the bedroom. In the way his footsteps were even heavier than usual, you spotted his annoyance as well.
âWhat do you expect of me? Youâre so impatient, woman,â he started once the doors closed behind him. âYou want everything and you want it now. I said Iâd do it, I swore Iâd do it but you admitted yourself we have to wait longer. If he dies here at night, do you think the noble lords of Giedi Prime will accept that so easily?â
âThen slay the ones who refuse to accept you as the successor!â You turned around with the rage making your blood boil. âSlay everyone standing in our way, as you promised. Do you want our son to be born in a world that he is manipulating for his own gain? Do you want to be his dog following the orders for the next few years? I am tired of playing the games with him on his own chess board. I want to make my own game, my own rules, my own board!â You tried to keep your voice down in case someone would spy on you but it was difficult with all that anger pouring out of you.
In one swift move, Feyd grabbed your chin and squeezed your cheeks as he brought your face so close to his that your noses were rubbing each other. There was so much anger in his eyes that the old you would start trembling out of fear for her life but the new you didnât even flinch.
âKeep your voice down, we will do it,â he spat out.
âNo,â you mumbled. âYou will do it. Youâre the hand that slays,â you reminded him and he kissed you so hungrily that you became breathless.
âI still want to kill you sometimes,â he confessed between one kiss and another as he led you back to your bed and laid you down on the mattress. âChoke you, slit your pretty little throat, watch you squirm under me as you bleed to death.â
âWhatever turns you on, my darling,â you chuckled at him as he looked at you sternly.
âIf I hurt you, Iâd kill myself right after. Iâm bound to you forever,â he confessed and you smiled gently.
You didnât want to tease him that after all, he did know what love was. After all, he did feel it. But you knew that heâd hate being confronted with the truth.
âIf something happened to you, I would want to die alongside you, too,â you told him. âYouâre the only one I have and none of my ambitions matter without you by my side.â
It was true. You didn't want to rule alone. In fact, you didn't want to ever feel lonely in your life again.
You were sitting next to Paul and watching the sunset in silence. In your dreams you would always meet him in the desert. Nothing else seemed to exist on Arrakis in the dreamworld â except for you and him.
âWhy do you haunt me?â You asked and laid your eyes on his angry face. He was always so angry these days.
You hated Paul from your dreams. He was different. There was no kindness and gentleness about him anymore. If you were supposed to be haunted by his ghost, youâd rather be haunted by the brother you had remembered instead.
âI am not here for you,â Paul snorted and you furrowed your brows. Then he looked down at your swollen womb and you instinctively protected it with your hands.
âWhat do you mean?â You gasped.
âThe spawn inside you shares my blood on both sides,â he answered mysteriously, which confused you greatly but you decided not to give it a second thought. After all, it was just a dream. âNo, it is not,â Paul smirked viciously at you, as if he was able to read your thoughts.
âGet up,â you heard Feydâs rough voice as his hand shook your arm. You woke up abruptly and sat up, trying to calm yourself after the dream.
âWhatâs going on?â You asked and looked around the dark room.
âCome with me,â your husband looked very pleased with himself as he pulled you out of the bed.
âWhat are youââ
âShh,â he put his finger over his mouth as he led you outside.
You gasped at the sight of the bodies scattered all over the corridor of the palace. Servants and guards with their throats slit, laying in poodles of their own blood.
âHave you done that?â You asked quietly and Feyd nodded. âMy girlsâŠâ you gasped.
âI havenât touched your pets,â he assured you and stopped in front of the doors leading to the Baronâs chambers.
âHave you killed himâŠ?â You were both excited and terrified of the outcome if the answer was yes. But, most importantly, you were in shock.
âNot yet,â Feyd answered as he pushed the doors open in front of you.
Not sure what his words meant, you entered the chamber carefully and spotted the Baron on his bed, letting out loud and raspy breaths. His life support machinery was no longer attached to him; you assumed Feyd had decided to give him a slow death.
You looked at your husband and spotted a sadistic sparkle in his eye as he was visibly enjoying the sounds and the view. He put his arm around you and walked you closer to the Baronâs bed.
That old and sick man looked pathetic at that moment and for a short while you even felt sorry for him. His eyes widened even further at the sight of you as he raised one of his hands towards you but you took a step back.
You didnât know what to expect of him on his deathbed. Some part of you craved for him to admit his defeat and name you a worthy successor of the Harkonnen throne. Some other part of you expected him to curse you and your whole bloodline, which would be quite justified.
However, you certainly did not expect the sheer desperation and debasement.
âP-pleaseâŠâ He could barely speak. âPlease, help me,â he tried to reach out for you.
You didnât feel sorry for him anymore. You felt disgusted.
âYouâre a weakling,â you smirked at him. âYou called my father weak but I am sure that he did not beg like a dog on his deathbed. I am sure he died with dignity.â
âPlease, help meâŠâ He coughed out. âHelp me and I will make your son an EmperorâŠâ
âI do not need you to make my son an Emperor,â you laughed with contempt. âI am to become The Baroness Harkonnen; commanding the largest army and possessing the biggest wealth in the galaxy.â
âF-Feyd, I was like a father to youâŠâ He searched for his nephewâs cruel eyes now, giving up on asking for your compassion and pity. âMy boyâŠâ
âLike a father, you say,â Feyd drawled. âI couldnât wait to kill you for so many years now.â
âPleaseâŠâ
âOh, shut him up, how long will it take for him to die?â You sighed with an eye-roll as Feyd nodded his head at you and grabbed the short knife attached to his hip.
âFarewell, dear uncle,â he smiled smugly as he slit the Baronâs throat.
You watched mesmerised, without even blinking. It felt like a dream more than reality.
âThe Arrakeen Palace will be considered cursed for all the Barons and Dukes from now on,â you only said.
Without a word, Feyd dropped the blade and fell on his knees in front of you, pulling you close by your hips and burying his face in the fabric of your nightgown right where your womb was. You knew what he wanted. A praise, an approval, a blessing.
âMy Baroness,â he breathed out.
âStand tall, my Baron,â you caressed his head and he looked up. His eyes sparkled in the moonlight and you cupped his chin to caress his full lips with your thumb. âYouâve made me proud and happy, my darling,â you assured him.Â
He nodded at you and collected the discarded blade from the floor. It was important not to leave any trace. You both went back to your chambers and laid down in bed, pretending to be asleep â too excited to actually be able to drift off. This time you didnât feel guilty even a little bit like after the death of the harpies. This time it didnât even feel like murder or taking another human beingâs life. This time it felt like nothing but relief.
You watched the sunrise through the window with your head on your husbandâs chest and his hand rubbing your back, waiting for the remaining servantsâ screams to signal the beginning of the new era.
There were screams indeed. People were running, yelling, banging on your door. Both Feyd and you acted surprised and startled at the news but Astra and Cara had to be the only people in the palace who actually believed your story. The medic inspected the Baronâs body and started to wonder if it really had been MuadâDibâs work since the cuts did not remind of the Fremen weapons. Feyd only hissed at him so the medic stopped any further insinuations.
Count Rabbanâs behaviour surprised you the most as he was following his brother around and seeming to act like the most loyal and obedient subject. He had quickly realised it was the best chance of survival for him. He hadnât questioned anything so far and simply followed every word leaving his younger brotherâs mouth.
Everything was a mess and chaos on that day but it was mostly Feyd dealing with it, basking in his new title and glory, as you were sitting on your bed with terrified Astra and Cara, holding them both and assuring them of their safety.
âHow can you not be worried, na-baroness? I mean, Baroness?â Astra widened her eyes. âIf MuadâDib was here last night⊠Oh, I donât even want to imagine what would happen if he went inside your chambers insteadâŠâ
âMy husband would defend me,â you kissed her forehead and then you kissed Caraâs.
âWhat if he comes back?â Cara was shaking out of fear and you felt bad for making them feel like this but you couldnât tell them the truth. âNow, when they know that we have fewer guards around?â
âWe will be prepared this time,â you squeezed their hands. âMy girls, I am sorry for being insensitive but I shall get dressed in mourning attire now and finally join my husband to help him with the officialties.â
Every lady travelled with a mourning dress just in case. Yours was a combination of black silk and black armour pieces with chains, connected to the matching headpiece. It looked dignified and intimidating â exactly how you wanted it to look like. You had already dreamt of The Baronâs death while planning your trip. Therefore the mourning dress you had chosen was accurate to your new role of The Baroness.
It sounded so good. For the upcoming days you would get drunk on the way people would address you. And then, when you'd finally be back on Giedi Prime, there would be a lavish celebration and official event for you two becoming the new Baron and Baroness. You couldn't wait for that day.
You smiled to yourself in the mirror and fixed the headpiece for one last time as you adjusted the Atreides signet ring on your pinky finger. On your pointing finger there was a huge ring with the Harkonnen emblem. And hidden between the folds of your dress and attached to the armour piece on your hip was the blade your husband had given you on the day of his birthday. No one could see it but you could reach for it swiftly in the case of emergency.
You joined Feyd in the conference room and everyone straightened at the sight of you. They always would but this time it felt different. You were the one holding the power â and they respected you for you, not for the fact that you were under protection of The Baron.
âBaroness,â they bowed down and went back to work, avoiding your gaze.
âHow are things going?â You approached Feyd as he looked you up and down with a smirk. You put your hand on his chest.
âI sent Rabban back on Giedi Prime with our uncleâs body,â he told you and held your hand to lay a kiss upon it. âHe will take care of the affairs there until we finish our business on Arrakis. I want to take care of that MuadâDib rat before returning home and finding someone worthy to replace me as the Governor here. Rabban will also send us more Harkonnen troops since we have lost many guards last night,â he informed you in an official manner.
âWe must avenge our late Lord Baron,â you clenched your jaw as you nodded. His eyes sparkled with mockery as he pretended to look worried.
You were sure that most people in that room had known the truth but they kept their poker faces on and allowed you to play out this little scene.
âMy Lord,â one of the engineers raised his voice, concerned. Feyd turned around and you both stared at the hologram of the Arrakis globe. Red dots started to appear on the orbit. âWe have guests,â the engineer explained. âThe ships are definitely not ours.â
âWho is it?â Feyd barked at him. âFind that out, we are not expecting anyone,â he looked at you, a little concerned.
You were not pleased with the idea of guests now, out of all times, either.Â
âWho dares to interrupt our peace unannounced on the day after our late Lord Baronâs tragic death?â You asked out loud, playing your mourning role the best you could.
What a mockery it was that you had to be hiding all the grief after your actual family but had to display fake tears for the man you had hated with every fibre of your being.
âM-my Lord, my LadyâŠâ the engineer turned around with his eyes widened, âitâs the Emperor himself⊠The whole imperial delegation.â
You and Feyd looked at each other.
âIt took them days to get here. There is no way they are here because of last nightâs incident,â Feyd pointed out. âStill, I do not understand. I have brought the spice production back to full efficiency. What could be the reason for his visit?â
You moved uncomfortably as your son kicked your rib. As if he too knew of the importance of this sudden imperial audience. It would be the first time youâd greet someone of such importance as The Harkonnen Baroness and it would be the first time youâd see the Emperor face to face. He had visited your father a few times on Caladan but children had not been allowed near their meetings.
âWe have to greet him and find out,â you took a deep breath in, preparing yourself mentally for the first challenge in your new role.
You shot Feyd a glance and he nodded at you, reassuringly. With him by your side, it couldnât go that bad, you tried to convince yourself. His presence was equipping you with courage and determination you had not known before.
Everything you were doing now, you were doing for the two of you and your future. Nothing else mattered.
MASTERLIST
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when you know you know | tom blyth
summary: the idiots finally meet (nepo baby!reader)
an: i can always count on reddit for inspiration bc i rewrote this a bunch of times đ also these are just random names for the friends lol @astheni-a
âdonât look now, but the guy behind you is staring.â your friend, meg, whispered to you. you and a couple of your girlfriends were seated in the food court of the mall. after a while, meg noticed that a group of guys sat a few tables away, one of them occasionally glanced at you.
âheâs cute,â your other friend, layne, joined in.
your other friend beside you, louise, smirked at you. âsomeoneâs got a crush. think about it, we can all go on dates together if he asks you out.â
you rolled your eyes. âi donât even know what he looks like. meg told me not to look.â
âhe has brown hair, probably six feet and really pretty eyes. i think thatâs all you need to know about your future man.â meg said.
âyou just described almost every boy here,â you replied. you looked down at your drink and noticed it was almost empty so you gathered your trash and decided to go throw it away. âi like being single anyways. i have more me time.â
âbabe, we know you donât like it. just talk to lover boy over there and if you donât like him then thatâs that. we wonât push you to talk to any one else ever again.â layne said.
âjust this one time.â you sighed. secretly, you did want someone to love. you never had an official boyfriend. during high school, you were talking with a guy from math class, but you quickly found out he just wanted to meet your famous dad. after that, you had difficulty knowing what relationship and friendships were real.
you stood up with your empty drink cup and walked to the nearest trash can. after throwing your trash away, you tried to look over your shoulder to see what boy meg had been taking about, but you couldnât figure out who it was. brown hair, pretty eyes, tall . . . that could be anyone.
you sighed and decided to just turn around and look instead of looking like a creep, but just as you turned around, a guy had walked right in front of you almost causing his drink to spill.
âoh my god, iâm so sorry.â you immediately apologize.
âitâs okay, um are you . . . okay?â he asked shyly.
âyeah, Iâm good. iâm sorry again. i . . yeah sorry.â you kept repeating as you looked at his eyes. they were a beautiful blue color. you were a sucker for colored eyes. well the british accent was a bonus too.
âiâm tom.â he introduced himself.
âiâm yn. nice to meet you. sorry for almost making you drop your drink. sorry, i apologize too much. itâs a habit.â you chuckled nervously.
get it together, yn
âno, itâs fine, wasnât really drinking it anyways. so . . are you here alone?â he asked, but regretted it immediately when he noticed it mightâve sounded creepy.
âno, iâm with my friends. iâm sorry, again, i noticed the accent, youâre british. are you visiting good olâ new york?â you questioned.
âstudying here actually. i go to juilliard. what about you?â
âiâm actually from los angeles but i visit here quite often. itâs my second home. but i do travel a lot so i call multiple places my second home. sorry if i ramble, i do that when i start getting comfortable.â
from the table, your friends saw how you talked with a stranger.
âdoes anyone know how to lip read?â
âshhh! shut up layne!â
âwhoâs gonna tell her thatâs not the guy we were talking about?â
âi donât want to break her heart. plus he does look exactly like how meg described so a win is a win.â
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HIII I kinda suck at writing so maybe you could take my idea and use your amazing writing skills and make something of it? (Only if you want ofc!!) hear me out yk how Spencer rambles about random facts and everything at the bau imagine if he had a partner (was a profiler as well) and that knew a lot about musics or movies and would ramble about it to him?
Ignore this if it sounds stupid đ
rambles | s. reid
summary: you talk a lot, spencer doesn't mind.
pairing: spencer reid x reader
warnings: okay so idk if this counts as gn!reader?? but reader wears a dress lol. drinking, and again my terrible english,, lmk if i missed anything!
a/n: hey beautiful!! this deffo does not sound stupid i had fun writing it but this is so bad im sorry i didn't do u justice *crying emoji* also im so sorry this took me forever to finish LMAOOO
masterlist
YOU CAN FEEL it.
In your spine, in your ears. The songâs quiet but it had you in its grip, tight and firmâmusicâs always been like that to you. It didnât matter if it was Hendrix, Queen or even Chopin; it has always been the one thing to make you stop dead at your feet. Itâs a feeling you canât quite put your finger on. There wasnât a word in the English language that could possibly describe how it made you feel. Perhaps, you think humorously, you ought to learn another language, or two.Â
Youâre wearing this dress. This sweet, white silk thing that sweeps against your knees each time you take a step. The taste of expensive wine sits against your lips, lingering. The glass rests idly around your hand and your grip is careful. Expensive red wine and a cheap dress don't usually mix well together.Â
âYou okay?âÂ
You smile, teeth and all. Spencer whoâs found his place next to you, furrows his eyebrows worry painted against his soft features. He looks tired. But heâs here, with the rest of the team; he always is.
âFine,â you say, blasĂ©. âYou, Dr. Reid?â
His eyebrows raise slightly, âYeah, fine.â then, ânice dress.â Itâs a small whisper.Â
You brush your tongue against the wine on your lips. The comment catches you off guardâespecially when heâs dressed like this and looks at you like that. So, all that leaves your wine-stained lips is a small: âOh.â then, because you remember your manners you say, âThank you.â
The song changes, and Spencer smiles, âThe songsââ he says âtheyâre nice.â
âIââ You stop yourself from rambling because really, theyâre more than nice. Itâs Elle Fitzgerald. SheâsâHer voice, her instrument is clear as a bell, with diction thatâs almost impossible to misunderstand. Her rhythm isâ well itâs, you can set her as the metronome for her own band. Which, well, isnât exactly easy to do. The way sheâs able to scoop and bend her pitches with such precision is, beyond, nice. So the song, really itâs, more than nice, itâs a masterpiece itâsâ
âUh, yeah, sânice.â you pause, âMore than nice, really.â
Spencer smiles, amused, âMore than nice?â he echoes.
You clear your throat, âItâ yeah. I mean, itâs Fitzgerald, you knowâŠâ
âI donât know,â he says simply.
Figures, you think. âNo, yeah. Sheâs, like, got this tone in her voice, you know? And itâs like sheâs the one leading the bandâ with the rhythm, I mean. As in like, instead of the drummer, which isnât exactly easy to do. You know, actually, some people say she â sheâs got the voice of an angel. Or something along the lines; canât really remember andââ you pause, slightly embarrassed at how much youâve been talking.
âEr, sorry,â you mumble sheepishly. The edge of your shoes had suddenly become increasingly interesting. âdidnât mean to go on a tangent.â
Spencer kisses his teeth, and you look up to find him grinning. âNo, uh,â he scratches the edge of his eyebrow. âYou donât need to apologize for talking about something you like.â He seems to think about his next words as he brushes his hand against your arm. It sends a shiver that lingers longer than the touch itself. Spencer Reid could be so cruel sometimes.Â
âI love listening to you talk.â
Your dress ends up wine-stained, anyway.
as usual my inbox is always open for requests (or just to talk lol) but it will take 192374 years to actually finish it,, reblogs are soo appreciated !! (u guys r always so kind idk why im asking for them) so is feedback btw!! (despretely in need of some)
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persuasion - jack hughes
pairing: jack hughes x fem reader
word count: 5.7k
tags/warnings: college/university au, fluff, slight angst?, fratboy! jack (he's sweet in this, dw), mentions of alcohol/drinking, no mention of y/n
summary: you get a bit more than you bargained for when paired up with all-american hockey star, jack hughes.
notes: hi. it's been a (long) while since i've posted on here. not to mention, i'm back writing about someone a bit different đ but i've recently gotten into the nhl and this fic is the result of me drunkenly coming across this photo a few days ago. despite the changes on this blog, i hope this post finds you well and that you enjoy this (poor) attempt of me getting back into writing. much love <3
The end of the semester couldnât have come sooner. Swapped with what was possibly the busiest youâve ever been, the sweet relief after submitting your last assignment was unparalleled and lulled you to a much deserved slumber, only to be awoken by a barrage of messages pinging from your bedside table. Disgruntled, your arm extends in search of your phone, groaning into your damp pillow as you blink away the tired film coating your eyes and read the messages from your best friend.
frat house party tonight, presence is mandatory!Â
all the girlies are onboard, your sexy ass better be ready by 9!
Another groan emits from you, exhaustion seeping through your bones at the mere mention of doing something else besides rotting in bed. Youâre about to type some incoherent excuse, but your best friend beats you to it.
apparently, z and his guys are going.Â
chances are jackâs there too.
Thereâs a messy stutter in your chest upon reading the message and suddenly, youâre more awake than before as you gingerly sit yourself up in your bed. Of course, sheâd mention he was going just to convince you further. You werenât even aware she knew of your crush. Considering you hadnât mentioned him much besides when asked, his name being referenced feels more intrusive than it should be. Then again, as perceptive as she is, there was no denying the fact.
Jack and yourself had worked on a group project earlier in the semester, which is how the two of you had crossed paths. Upon hearing of the task at hand, you couldnât help but let out a sigh because you were never a fan of working with others you didnât know, but considering none of your friends took your class, it seemed like the perfect opportunity to get to know others and build your social circle. When your assigned group had got together towards the end of the lecture to discuss formalities and such, you hadnât expected the whirlwind that was to come in the presence of a sandy brunette haired boy.Â
Jack is as easy-going as he is charming. Cracks a couple jokes and suddenly, all the ice isolating your group dissolves to water and there are constant hums of conversation bouncing off every member of your group. Heâs nice too, considerate of everyoneâs schedule and what tasks they felt confident in completing, never uttering a word of complaint unless warranted. Itâs interesting, heâs interesting, you think to yourself. Perhaps due to the fact that since heâd revealed himself to be in a frat, you had some preconceived notions as to what his personality would be like and maybe at times, heâd fit that stereotype to a tee, there were other times heâd stray away from it completely and leave you curious as ever.
Peculiar is what youâd describe those few weeks to be, your interest gravitating towards any relation to Jack. Heart beating as you walked past your universityâs ice arena, knowing he practically lived on the ice beyond his time in class. Eyes lighting up when he texted in the group chat, mental fuzziness plaguing you every time you sat across from one another as you completed your portion of work in the universityâs library. Youâd be a fool to dismiss the budding attraction you felt towards him, spinning your world round but also leaving you feeling so unsure of everything, yourself included. Thereâs no scarcity of girls who like him, it proved to be difficult resisting the All-American hockey star with looks to match. However, taking into account the sheer volume of attention directed his way everyday, your lingering glances didnât seem to be much more significant. So, one-sided this crush remains to you, storing away the quiet memories of shared laughs and time spent together in a place close to your heart.Â
That was until he invited you to his game, shortly after your project had been submitted for assessment. You wanted to go, you wanted to go so badly that you agonised over the decision for longer than necessary, but ultimately, as you laid awake that night, eyes blazing red with fatigue, doom scrolling to further delay your dreams, the evidence for your answer surfaced. It was nothing but a silly Instagram post from one of his friends, Trevor Zegras, the boyfriend to one of your friends. A collection of typical photos: the boys, hockey and more of the antics they got to. Itâs in the last slide where in the background of a recent football game is none other than Jack, in all his handsome glory, grinning ear to ear as a girl envelopes him in a hug that feels too intimate to be seen. Embarrassment runs your skin hot and jealousy leaves a bitter taste in your mouth, the thought of you entertaining anything more than platonic with Jack a pipedream at best. Naturally, there can be so many explanations for the photo, but what rings true is that youâve made yourself vulnerable to heartbreak, which is nowhere to be found on your agenda. So, you call it a night, turning off your phone and hoping to put the crush behind you come tomorrow.
And, it works for a bit. Jack doesnât text you further and you donât run into him on campus. Summer soon approaches and the last few days before your break have you buzzing with excitement for all the plans you have lined up. Your world doesnât hinge on every interaction you have with Jack and your mind is freed from the shackles of mulling over every detail in said interaction. Itâs liberating and youâd like to keep it that way. A fleeting crush, you reason, all said and done with. A mantra you repeat to yourself as you respond back to your best friend, gleaming as you and your group chat discuss outfits options and pinterest inspired makeup looks.Â
-
Thereâs nothing better than being with your girls, youâre reminded, as the buzzing excitement never fizzles as the night stretches on. Controlled chaos dominates the night as you pack into one friendâs rooms to get ready together, helping each other with eyelash extensions and annoying back zippers. Someone makes the suggestion to drop by the campus bar for a drink or two, just to ease the nerves, and it turns out to be a great idea because by the time you stumble out of the bar and towards the frat house, the partyâs in full swing.Â
Trashed lawn and red cup galore, the music somehow manages to reach outside the house with hoards of people dotted around and inside the house. With the merry buzz youâve got from the bar, confidence details your movements as you lead your friends with clasped hands into the packed house, mumbling a thousand âsorryâs as you trample on through the crowded hallways to find yourselves in one (?) of the living rooms.Â
Hands suddenly grasp at yours and youâre thrown into a fit of giggles as your friends tangle themselves up in a messy but fun dance. You follow suit, fully relishing in the euphoria of the night and the found family you have in these girls as you dance and chatter until you have no choice to venture into the kitchen for a refreshment.Â
Surprisingly, the kitchen is vacant as you push through towards its door you were directed to, scanning the room amongst belongings to find some mixer for your helping of vodka stashed away in your purse. Despite your better judgement, you resort to apprehensively searching through cupboards on your tippy toes in search for mixer and as youâre about to open the last cupboard, the kitchen door opens.Â
âLooking for something?â
Goosebumps arise and your heart stills. You know that voice like the back of your hand, the same voice that echoes in the back of your mind and whispers sweet nothings in your ear when you dream. The fact that heâs so ingrained in your memory makes you curse at yourself, teeth gnawing on the plumpiness of your bottom lip as you attempt to recollect your racing thoughts. With a quiet breath, you sink back from your elevated posture and turn towards the source of the voice, blinking like a deer caught in the headlights.Â
Itâs comical how such a simple sight renders you a loss for words. In the doorway of the large kitchen stands Jack, shoulder and head leaning against the doorframe as he looks at you with an expectant look and a cheeky grin to match. His legs are crossed at the ankles and heâs holding a beer, but heâs got this pearl white long sleeved polo on with washed out jeans and a black snapback to top it all off. The outfit in itself is so simple and yet, here you are, heart being sent into overdrive as the effortless combo drives you wild. Sets your skin alight and conjures up electricity that pulses through you like wildfire.
âLemonade,â you gracefully croak out, gesturing towards your empty red cup. âI didnât bring much to mix my drink with.â
âHere, Iâll help you with that,â he reassures you, bouncing off the door frame as he draws closer to you, your feet absently shifting a few steps backwards. âNo need to back up. I donât bite, you know?â
You huff at the comment, realising how foolish his mere presence makes you and will yourself to relax, shoulders easing down from your ears as you watch Jack search through the cupboards. It doesnât take him long to find what heâs looking for, pulling out a large bottle of lemonade that coasts against the marble of the countertop.Â
âFeel free to use as much as you like, I never usually have this myself anyways.â insists Jack, turning himself around with his back against the countertop, arms crossed his chest with a peering eye directed to you.Â
âHow thoughtful of you.â you jester as a brief chuckle is shared between the two of you, the loud thumps of heavy bass music sounding from beyond the kitchen door as silence settles between the two of you.Â
âItâs been a while, howâve you been?â he asks, undivided attention focused on you as you pour the last of the lemonade. If not for the embarrassment of spilling your drink in front of him, the unsolicited awareness heâs currently given you would have resulted in exactly that, so you stop yourself and give him a convincing smile.
âIâve been good, thanks. Itâs the end of the academic year, I have no more complaints,â you muse, bringing the cup to your lips as you peer over the rim to look at Jack, his long lashes fluttering as his focus remains you. Your heartbeat picks up its pace. âWhat about you? Frozen fourâs a big deal, but winning the championship is even bigger.â
Jack gives a lighthearted laugh, smugness adjusting his posture as his shoulders move back and his chest puffs out. Meanwhile, he gives this half shrug and grin that has heat gravitating towards the apples of your cheeks. Itâs one of the things you like about Jack, how confident and sure of himself he is without it being overbearing and unappealing. It feels assuring, not having to dim your own light for the sake of his own comfort.Â
âYeah, that was nuts, I canât lie. We had a really good run and I think our efforts really showed for themselves in that case,â Jack responds, taking a swig of his beer. âChrist, I sound like Iâm talking to the media or something.â
âWell, consider this practice for when you join Jersey in the future,â you simper, snickering as you take a sip of your own drink. âIâm sure youâll have plenty of fun speaking to the media.â
He gives an eyeroll, amusement prominent in the way his eyes twinkle and you can't help but laugh more. âSo you say. How did you even know about Jersey?â
Your laugh is cut short, ice cold realisation washing over you like a bad hangover as his words hang in the air like a gauntlet waiting for its descent. Of course, this was nothing to be caught off-guard by considering how much your university boasts about how Jack, amongst other talented players, were drafted before committing to your university. However, the painful memory of you awake one late night doesnât escape you, said night spent hesitantly typing his name into Google to come across all the info you knew to confirm how great of a hockey player he was. You feel shameful even looking him in the eyes right now.
So, your eyes stray from him, the somewhat sticky floor being the source of all your interest. âWho doesnât know? Our uni does a good job of reminding us of everyone thatâs been drafted.âÂ
You decide to spare a glance at Jack, taking in how a pinkish hue decorates the surface of his cheeks as his lone hand goes to scratch the back of his neck. The timidity that clouds his movement evokes a simper out of you, one that you direct into your cup, its contents rapidly draining under the weight of your continued conversation.
âOh, man. Maybe, I shouldnât have asked that,â he jokes, smile all pearly white and heart fluttering. âCanât blame a guy for being nervous, no?â
âNerv-â
Suddenly, the kitchen door bursts open and a flood of drunken students come barrelling in, hollering as their drinks splash to the floor and chaos ensues. Youâre just as confused at their unexpected appearance as you are at the comment Jack made, but before you have a chance to ponder further, a warm hand settles against the small of your back followed by the gentle waft of Jackâs aftershave, a mixture sea salt with a hint of lavender and spicy nutmeg. It takes everything in you for your knees not to buckle.
âLetâs head out back.â he whispers, breath fanning over your neck as his fingertips ignite fire against your skin.Â
Abruptly, you clear your throat, mindlessly nodding along as you blindly follow him out back, Jackâs larger build serving as a shield of sorts as he seamlessly navigates his way through the hordes of students. He does so with your hand in his and as much as your internal monologue unleashes panicked squeals at the contact, you revel in his touch - calloused hands that hold yours like porcelain, warm hands that match together like the universe and all its stars.Â
A cool breeze blankets your skin and your focus shifts from your inner thoughts, taking in the generous and lush green outdoor space with sparse camping chairs circling a bonfire and a large tree further up ahead draped in fairy lights. Thereâs some people here too, but the atmosphere is a 180 from the mayhem inside, hushed light-hearted conversations exchanged beside the lit bonfire with the faint smell of weed filtering through the crisp air. The dazzling fairy lights blind you into bumping into Jackâs back, apologising with a laugh before he collapses onto the daisy white hammock before you.Â
You follow suit with the carefree attitude Jack gives you, but you miscalculate horrendously because you donât fall into the place beside your crush, but into his lap. Shock runs through your veins like ice as your bewilderment freezes you in place, mouth gaping open as you turn to face Jack in absolute horror. He seems to fare better with the unexpected contact, enlarged azure eyes showing his awe and yet his hands are in all the right places - supporting your waist as your weightless body struggles to hold its own.Â
âIâm-â the hairs on your neck are standing and youâre close to crying, the heat of your mortification burning your body hot like a furnace. â-so sorry. I didnât-I didnât even-â
âRelax, youâre good,â the chill of his beer against your skin sends a shiver down your spine, the feeling intensifying by the thousands as Jackâs thumb gives your exposed skin the smallest caress. Youâre sure youâre the personification of shock at how every inch of your features displays pure alarm. âUnless this was your plan?â
Youâre shoving him before your brain is able to comprehend its commands, your flustered state leaping out of his lap and collapsing back alongside him this time, hands clasped over your eyes as you take the time to maybe calm down. âWhat frat house even has a hammock anyways?â
âRachel - Zâs girl - thought itâd be a nice touch for the garden,â you hear Jack mumble, but youâre too busy nursing your ego to fully immerse in conversation. âYouâre friends with her, right? You guys came in together.âÂ
âKeeping an eye out for me, Hughes?âÂ
Apparently, your ego isnât as bruised to make such a comment, a smirk finding itself onto the surface of your face as youâve yet to remove your hand from your vision.
âItâs hard to keep my eyes off you.âÂ
You freeze in place, the heaviness in your stomach incomparable with the hammering of your heart against your chest as your brain picks apart Jackâs comment at the speed of light. None of the comments Jack has made throughout your entire conversation have gone over your head, the flirty undertones as clear as day. He wasnât as up front with his compliments when you two first started working together, the furthest compliment heâd given denoting how nice you looked despite rolling out of bed twenty minutes beforehand. His directness makes your eyebrows furrow, or rather his intentions have you looking around as if you could find some answers. Perhaps this is how Jack is at parties - all pleasant with a careful flirtation that gradually pulls you inwards. Or maybe, this simply is the case of him showing his interest in you. The concept is not lost on you, but there is still apprehension that manifests within you, for reasons you are yet to discover.
Youâre about to say something, your parted lips issuing a single incoherent syllable that dissolves on your tongue when the faint murmur of country music from a group of guys up ahead takes your notice, Jackâs nose scrunching with delight as he exclaims, âAh, what a banger.â
Your eyebrow quirks upwards, merriment spreading against your features. âI never pegged you as the country type.âÂ
âWell, Iâm not a Drake guy, Iâll tell you that much.â Jack shifts in his seat, extending his arm out behind your back.Â
âSo, a belieber then?â you jester, taunting eyebrows raised as you canât keep your snicker to yourself when you watch Jack roll his eyes with the same grin.
âIf that makes you happy, then yeah,â Jack reasons nonchalantly, whereas you make a pathetic attempt at stopping the stammer in your chest. âBut no, thatâs pretty much all that plays when my brothers and I wakesurf in the summer, unless Z is on the aux. Then, he and Quinn have a go at each other for it.â
Chuckles emit from your lips as you picture the image of a sunny summer day out on a boat, Jackâs older brother, Quinn, and Trevor becoming enemies of silence as they bicker over music choices. A warm fuzziness embraces you, the image placing you right beside Jack as laughter bubbles between the two of you whilst Luke wakesurfs in the background. Itâs a honeyed depiction, all rose-tinted and for you to hold close to your heart along with other fantasies you allow yourself to entertain.
âWeâre planning on going back to our summer house upstate where we do loads of other stuff,â Jack trails off, his fingers tapping against the glass of his bottle as you two share a look between each other. His eyes flicker downwards almost immediately, the top of his ears crimsoning. âYou should stop by sometime. Itâd be good to see you over the summer.â
For someone as confident as Jack, these rare glimpses of timidity demonstrate themselves as a pure anomaly. So, you can imagine your surprise at not only his incredibly generous offer but also his sheepish demeanour; gaze never aligning with yours as you feel his fingers fiddle with the material of the hammock behind your back. The sight enamours you, a rush of endearment washing over you as you lean into the feeling, not bothering to hide the wide smile growing across the expanse of your face.Â
If this is what awaits you at their summer house, youâre already packed and ready to go.
âI could be persuaded.â Jackâs already rolling his eyes and against his better judgement, he finds himself chuckling with you too.Â
When your amusement blends into the night sky, Jack's eyelids fall halfway, gaze steady as he mirrors your prior smirk thatâs all but gone with the quiet wind. âAnd, what would that involve?âÂ
A moment is shared between the two of you. Burning bright like a star and erupting fireworks in your fingertips as your eyes linger on one another longer than explanatory. The landscape of his dotted moles capture your attention first, your sight leading itself to the galaxy-like twinkle dazzling in the ocean blue of his eyes. Itâs so precious, this point in time - so delicate and intimate that it feels like a secret, whispers of infatuation pulling you together by their invisible strings as Jackâs extended arm circles your shoulders. You lean in, the temptation of his lips calling your name. Earlier restlessness ceases to exist as your movements read as second nature, the bruising of your chest accompanying the fuzziness that dances in your stomach as Jack leans into too.
âYo, Jack!â
The moment is all but gone, burst like a bubble as both your heads turn in the direction of the voice, spying one of Jackâs friends, Cole, standing on the porch with a hand clasped around his mouth.
âGet your ass in here, weâre playing Jenga!â
A string of unpleasantries filter through Jackâs mouth in the form of a murmur, remnants of your interrupted kiss lingering as Jack gives your shoulder a gentle squeeze and gives you the most apologetic look youâve ever seen. Puppy eyes and pouty lips, an image you lock away in your heart forever.Â
âDid you wanna head in?â He gives you the choice, head tilted to the side as he studies your expression whilst you ponder the inquiry.
The almost kiss is something to behold and if this has occurred weeks prior amidst the intensity of your crush, you would have begged and pleaded to stay, hinging on the hopes of whatever this is being fabricated once again to fulfil your fondness dreams. But, this feels different. It feels sold, as opposed to balancing upon shaky possibilities. This is undeniable, a point in time that is infinite and kissed upon by destiny. A junction you can return to time and time again.
âYeah, Iâm sure my friends are looking for me anyways,â you unravel yourself from Jackâs loose grip, hoisting yourself up before you turn to face him with a soft beam. His expression reads unsure, gaze scattered before he looks upwards before your sneakers knock against his impossibly white Air Forces. You nod towards the house, the giddiness building within you exceptional as your hand extends out to meet his. âLetâs head in together?â
It comes out more of a question than a statement, but you could care less when Jack gives you that soft smile thatâs only reserved for you, grabbing a hold of your hand after he brings himself off the hammock before you proceed to return back to the party.
The bustling atmosphere appears to have maintained itself in your absence, hundreds of conversations mixing in with the booming sounds of some bass heavy hip hop song. You nod your head to the beat, grinning when you see familiar faces in the crowd as you trail behind Jack yet again, following him in promise of your friends who Cole had mentioned joined their groupâs game of Jenga. You make do with getting down the stairs of the basement without tumbling due to their frigid nature, face instantly lighting up as you catch sight of your friends, collapsing into a fit of excited hugs and shared giggles as you all catch up on the events of the party.
Amidst all the dialogue, some of which youâre assuming Jackâs sorority brothers and friends make quick work of getting the bare room ready, arranging beers for everyone as the box of Jenga is brought out. The weight of concentrated eyes seers into your goosebump-riddled skin and by the time you volunteer to assemble the Jenga tower, youâre more than aware of Jackâs attention on you. Even with how overflowing the confidence you possessed was as you left the back garden, the heat of his gaze reduces you to a sheepish mess, antsy hands uncertain of their movements as you attempt to achieve some standard of normalcy, your eyes avoiding his. Itâs when your hands accidentally touch that you cannot avoid it much longer, peering through clumpy eyelashes with a flush that feels as vivid as painted glass.Â
A lone corner of his lips inclines, his look of allurement tangled with blatant attraction enough to make you knock over some of the Jenga pieces. A deep chorus of disapproving sounds holler at your actions, your sheepishness fended off by the laughter amongst you and Jack as you continue to assemble the tower again, this serving as the last of your communication before the Jenga game commences.
Every Jenga piece taken out of the tower involves a dare that has laughter erupting from the pits of your stomach or mouth gaping open at the gull others possess whilst intoxicated. With the muffled sounds of the music upstairs and endless talk in the room, merriment captures your heart in a gentle squeeze as the dares carry on, the harmless fun quickly becoming one of your favourite memories in recent times.
Itâs your turn to go and the frat guys are already teasing you with endearing nicknames, putting a smile on your face as your hands steady to pull out a tricky Jenga piece with ease. Wooden block in hand, your line of vision skims the chicken scratch of a dare with an effortless glee thatâs swiftly replaced with plentiful surprise.
âWhat does it say?!â exclaims Trevor, the anticipation in his voice evident as he squeals his words.
Youâre reducing to your meek self again, not daring to look upwards as you enunciate your words to aid your own comprehension. âSpend seven minutes in heaven with the player across from you.â
Youâre unsure whether the universe has some really good jokes up their sleeve or this is just fate to begin with because when you lift your head up, already knowing, Jackâs amused facial expression speaks for itself. Â
Hollers and cheers fill the room, enough pandemonium to make you crimson as you stumble to your feet, casting a peek at your best friend with a cross between disbelief and delight. Your best friend, the same one that texted you about Jackâs presence at the party tonight, bawls her hand into a tight fist, bringing it to her chest as a sign of victory with mischief painted all over her. The ridiculousness of this farce eliminates you from ruminating about what awaits you in the closet a mere metres away. The guy most pleased with the situation opens the closet door, a few brooms pushed back into the compact space that is surprisingly clean with no cobwebs or dust in sight.
âAll clean and ready for you two lovebirds,â Trevor grins with the keenness of a kid in a candy store, pushing back his long locks of hair as he sends a wink your way. âDonât get too carried away in there, youâve only got seven minutes.â
Jack says something in reply to Trevorâs cheeky comment but youâre too preoccupied by your own thoughts, feet carrying you to the fate of your Jenga dare as the door closes and darkness shrouds you.Â
Itâs silent for a minute, nothing but soft breaths and dulled whispers from outside the closet door. The closet is dangerously compact, your back up against the wall not sparing you from establishing your own personal space, the slightest shift of your shoes inevitably going to knock against Jackâs. Outside in the back garden feels so far away now, slipping through your hands as if sand with the daunting weight of unsaid expectations folding your arms and clearing a stubborn croak in your throat.
As the seconds tick on and no communication is shared, the everlasting laps you round around your mind exhaust you for the last time and you decide to face whatever this is head on, a start being making eye contact with the man that makes it the hardest thing in the world. However, with the tiniest sliver of dimmed light peaking through underneath the closet door, you can see him. Jack, in all his glory - soft and boyish, all charming in nature. The round pool blue of his eyes and the moles that dot his skin like constellations. Itâs a rush of emotions, all raw and bare, to overwhelm and comfort you, with the easiness of his smile that directs your way and warms your heart like no other.
âWe donât have to do anything in here, Iâd never do anything to make you uncomfortable,â Jack explains, his hand reaching to drag down one side of his face as his eyes cast away. âI hope you know that.â
This - you feel resolute in - establishing some sense of security in this room as you smile up at Jack. âThe thought didnât even cross my mind.âÂ
Thereâs a double meaning in your words and you donât bother to correct yourself, reading in between the lines cementing itself as your favourite pastime. But, Jack knows and so do you. Perhaps you knew all along that every nook and cranny in your heart was specially reserved for Jack and no other could do. Maybe, you spent so much time in your head because this unexplored territory felt like the birth of the universe, so big and beautiful that it had more questions than answers. A forbidden fruit of sorts - a sweet mirage that the more you pulled away, gravity pulled you right back. A place where you belonged - with him in this moment forever sealed between the two of you.
Jack offers a smile in the wake of your thoughts, timid yet teasing in nature and you canât resist, in the almost dark of the closet, grin too because this was sealed from the very beginning. Alone with infamous fratboy Jack Hughes, under some sort of awkward pretence bringing you together because you let your fears get the best of you, a stark contrast to what they are now - engulfed in thoughts, feelings of your lips against his and how this charade will come to a close, the building tension boiling till it overflows
âHey-â you both say at the same time, silencing as you chuckle at the unison you unite in.
âLadies first.â
âIâm more interested in what you have to say.âÂ
Because thereâs no doubt in your mind heâll steal the words right out of your mouth, the mere thought of those words escaping his lips the centre of all your desires.
He pauses, eyes searching yours for confirmation which presents itself in the toothy grin he struggles not to reflect, canine sinking into the corner of his lips before he responds, âIf you insist.â
Jack doesnât miss a beat as he reaches for your hand, absently tracing patterns into the skin with a thoughtful hum that proceeds his words.Â
âI think Iâve been a lot more straightforward with how I feel about you, but Iâd like to chance to tell you right here that Iâm interested in you, in being with you. To the point that the boys get sick of me yapping about it,â you chuckle at his comment, the humour of the joke distracting you from the flood of emotions that submerges you indefinitely. âI felt this way from the time we got assigned to work together. And, if maybe you had any reservations about us, Iâd do whatever it takes so that they donât exist because youâre what matters most and that will never change.â
No feeling can compare to this. Itâs almost as if youâre experiencing the full spectrum of emotions for the first time, rejoicing in the sunshine Jack basks upon you in the wake of his confession. A mirage turned reality, the colours are bright and blinding and youâre so elated within yourself that you physically cannot do more than bring Jackâs hand to your cheek to kiss his palm. A confirmation that needs no words.Â
The warmth of his hand against your cheek melts you into his skin, eyelids falling shut as you revel in the tender caresses of his thumb, of his love and the unspoken words between you. A graze against your throat has your eyes fluttering open, lips parted as Jack secures his hand gently against the nape of your neck. A soft inhale escapes you as his thumb traces the corner of your mouth, dilated pupils flickering between your own and your lips.
âCan I-â
âYes, please.âÂ
A star is born at the centre of your lips as they fold over one another, blending seamlessly together as you move together in synchronised harmony. You taste the remnants of beer, inhale his musky cologne and send yourself flying into another universe as Jack holds you close for impact. All your brain knows to do is convey your sentiment tenfold, kissing him as if touch starved as your fingers thread through the curls of his hair. You commit this to memory - the slowness of the kiss, the scent of his apple shampoo and his curls around your fingers, the feathery feeling of your fluttering heart and the tenderness of your hearts beating as one. So sickeningly besotted with another that everything pales in comparison.
Reluctantly, you pull away from his soft lips when the shared oxygen between you two vanishes, eyes slow to open but ultimately capturing the part of Jackâs rouge lips that quiver in your wake, his gaze meeting yours moments later.Â
You kiss him again for good measure.
âAlright, horny bastards. Timeâs up!â Coleâs voice thunders from beyond the door.
Lips still pressed against Jackâs, you both smile into one last kiss, just as sweet as the last. Jack savours it for what itâs worth, forehead pressed against yours as you two stand together, bruised chests aching with all the yearning that can fit into your palms.
âConsider me persuaded.âÂ
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sweet nothing âą 8
| in which you run into an old costumer |
âł Description: being a guest at the Jeon Estate after a mishap of being kidnapped and dragged into your brothers affairs isnât all that bad. Truth be told it brings you a lot closer to the mobster and owner of the estate Jeon Jungkook himself.
His two rules are simple, donât cause trouble and donât give him a hard time. Somehow you manage to constantly do both in the most endearing way despite being pregnant and waddling around most of the time.
Pairing: Jungkook/reader, ???/reader
âł Genre: slice of life AU, mafia!AU, pregnancy, thereâs likeâŠa little bit of a plot but not a lot, future smut? maybe? it's very domestic!
Word count: 3k
Previous | Next
Note: just know that the only reason these updates take so long is because I keep writing plot based chapters and I really just wanna post fluff based chapters đ
âThank you for taking me out!â You grinned as you took a large sip of your hot chocolate, it was still definitely not cold enough for it yet but you didnât care.
Something about hitting your third trimester had you wanting to nest like crazy, it had you going around the estate cleaning and getting guards to help move furniture around.
You really had no right to be doing it but nobody told you otherwise.
Jungkook had come back midday, surprisingly early, he had paused in the entry hall of his home locking eyes with the pregnant menace that had abruptly put herself at the forefront of his life once again.
It was then he realized you definitely needed to get out of the estate.
âIf it keeps you from not moving all my stuff around,â He shrugged, leaning back in his seat, eyes flickering from his phone to you.
You frowned, âIâm sorry, I donât even know what possessed me.â You sighed, âWell I do, they say third trimester can make you start nesting.â
âNesting?â
You glared are the way he snorted as if not believing you, âItâs a fact, you can look it up.â
âThe fuck is that even supposed to be? What are you, a bird?â
âIt means you just get the innate urge to justâŠâ you puffed your cheeks, ignoring that look he was giving you, âClean and decorate and justâŠI donât know I canât describe it! Just wish I had my own place to do that with and prepare for the baby.â
Jungkook sighed, his eyes went from looking at you to dropping down to your stomach, it was round when you had first come to the estate, but it was evident six weeks had passed, âThen maybe itâs time we talk about a nursery.â
You paused, getting ready to take another drink from your cup but it never meets to your lips.
Jungkook sighed, âI know you donât wanna talk about it, but finding your brother has quite literally lead me to dead ends I didnât even think would exist. Youâre almost thirty weeks pregnant, thatâs less than three months.â
âOkay yeah I can do basic math, but itâs already been almost two months. Surely it wonât take another two months to find him,â You pressed your lips together nervously.
âWould it be so terrible if you gave birth in the estate? Itâll probably be a better experience than the hospital.â Jungkook commented, picking up his coffee as he took a sip.
It wasnât that you were against giving birth in the estate, professional staff in the comforts of a bed? That was a luxury every woman could only dream of having, it was more the aftermath of it.
The idea of still living at the estate post pregnancyâŠit was a dangerous thought, it was too close to the life you had once wanted with Jungkook.
You just werenât sure how to articulate that too him.
Jungkook finally raised a brow at you, noticing your lack of reply.
âI justâŠdonât want to get too comfortable at the estate.â You finally spoke carefully, âI don't think that's good for anybody involved.â
âI understand but I also donât like being unprepared- in any aspect concerning me or my estate, and that includes you whether you want it or not.â Jungkook replied, âJust because a nursery is there doesnât mean itâll ever be used, itâll just be there so first of all, you stop moving all my shit and you have a place to do your bird stuff-â
âNesting.â You glared, lips quirking into a pout as your hands wrapped around your stomach.
Jungkookâs lips curved a little, âBird stuff. And second, if it does turn out that your stay is extended, itâll be ready.â
You still werenât completely sold on the idea, if anything you felt like it would just feed into the delusion even further.
âWhy hello there mama.â Another voice suddenly cut in, grabbing a chair from the empty table next to you both and plopping it on the side of your table.
Jungkook immediately straightened up, eyes glaring daggers that could definitely kill, âWhat the fuck are you doing here?â
âYoongi!â
The man brushed his black hair from his eyes a quirky smirk on his face as he shrugged, âUh Iâm just stopping in to say hello to my favorite barista who got put on bed rest early.â
A smile twisted on your lips, you were familiar with his face, he had been a regular for almost two years, the realization however quickly hit that Jungkook was very acquainted with this man.
You felt flabbergasted for a moment, you couldnât believe you never made the connection that the regular customer Yoongi was also Underboss business partner Yoongi.
âItâs nice to see you again Yoongi! I can't believe I didnât recognize you as Jungkookâs partnerâŠâ You sheepishly smiled.
Jungkook clearly didnât share the same sentiment, his nostrils flared and he looked ready to maul his partner.
âNah probably for the best you didnât realize. You as well, you look only a thousand times prettier, have that pregnancy glow about you.â Yoongi threw your a wink.
Jungkook wasnât sure what made him more violent, the fact that you both were already well acquainted or Yoongi so casually flirting with you.
It was part of his personality but it still didnât make any attention he or any other male gave you, any easier for Jungkook to witness.
âIf you arenât here for business, get the fuck away from our table.â Jungkook gritted his teeth, as if it took every fiber of his being to not right hook.
Yoongi didnât seem phased, âOh I was just in the area, been coming to Serendipity for a long while now, and then I suddenly see my favorite barista whoâs been gone for two months, of course I have have to say hello.â
âOkay well you said hello, now go the fuck away.â
âJungkook!â You said sternly, âDonât be so stubborn, Yoongi can sit with us for a few minutes at least.â
His eyes were a raging fire as they burned into you, his chest puffing but he said no more as Yoongi observed you both, a smirk on his face as he leaned back in his chair.
âHow are you enjoying the estate Y/n?â
You smiled tenderly, âThe company makes it honestly, I donât know what Iâd do without Jungkook and Yeonjun.â
âYeonjun?â Jungkook looked like he sucked on a sour lemon as he spat the name out.
âI still want my apartment back but Iâve made the most of the it. What about you? Why havenât you come to visit if you knew where I was?â You asked, curious as to what the man had been up too.
Yoongiâs gaze flickered to Jungkook, âWellâŠletâs just say I was asked to not drop by unless it was absolutely necessary.â
âAnd it isnât.â Jungkook gritted.
âOkay well first of all this doesnât count cause weâre not at the estate, second of all youâre not the only one who has relations to Y/n, I mean have you ever had this womanâs chai? Or her baked cinnamon rolls? Talented hands right there.â Yoongi stretched out in his seat, that playful nature about him.
âOh donât flatter me.â You shooed his praise.
âNo you deserve all the praise in the world, in fact you deserve-â
âWeâre going.â Jungkook stood up from his seat, sick of this if he had to hear one more word come out of his stupid partners mouth.
âJungkook!â You complained, but nevertheless took his hand when he offered it, âPlease visit Yoongi, youâre conversation is always welcomed.â
Yoongi only smiled, sunk into his seat as he watched the tall broody figure practically drag you away, it made him laugh in amusement.
Yoongi by no means kept an eye on you the last two years for his own benefit, but he supposed somethings would always remain thankless.
He had accomplished what he wanted though, evidently no matter how much Jungkook talked- and he talked a lot, it was clear he had grown possessive over you in the last few months.
Yoongi shook his head in amusement, watching the viper leave the parking lot through the window, he was happy to see that old spark in his partner return.
âWhat was that about!â You complained, immediately dialing the heat down to sixty in the car.
âYou shouldnât be talking to him,â Jungkook grumbled, hands gripping the steer wheel as if he was trying to strangle it, âIf you care about your babyâs safety youâll make an active effort to not talk to him.â
âHes been one of my regulars for like two years,â you complained, âHow was I supposed to know he was your partner? I never even officially met him! What makes him anymore dangerous then you? Hm?â
Jungkook deflated, obviously not having a good reason, âThe difference is Iâm protecting you.â
âOh so youâre saying he wouldnât?â
âThe point,â Jungkook gritted his teeth in annoyance, âIs donât talk to him.â
You frowned as you twisted to fully look at Jungkook, was heâŠjealous?
âAre you mad that Iâm paying attention to someone else?â You asked upfront, you could only be discreet about so many things.
âIâm not madâ.
âNo youâre definitely mad.â You replied pointedly.
âIâm annoyed that my business partner is talking to me outside of business.â Jungkook replied.
âBut he was talking to me, not you.â You crossed your arms.
âHe was doing that on purpose.â Jungkook huffed.
It was silent for a long moment as you folded your hands into your lap.
Of course you didnât have to point it out, but truthfully it felt too ridiculous to not? âAre you jealous?â
âNo.â
There was another pause.
âWhy would I be jealous?â
âYou tell me,â you replied, a pout on your lips, âYou always do this when someone talks to me, men specifically.â
âDo you actually want an honest answer?â Jungkook looked even more annoyed, even so much as throwing you a frosty glance before his eyes returned to the road.
You blinked before a troubled frown slowly curved on your lips, you could think of several ways heâd be honest and none of them youâd be able to fully believe.
âWhat I want,â you took a breath, âIs to be able to have a conversation without you looking like youâre shooting daggers out of your eyes.â
âI wasnât shooting daggers out of my eyes.â
You puffed your cheeks, âWell you claim you donât do a lot of things, that you do in fact, do.â
âHow about we just stop talking.â Jungkook replied.
You pouted but spoke no more as you yawned.
âDo you wanna go home?â
You nodded with a small groan, âYeah, I need to take a nap,â you nodded with another yawn.
Jungkook only nodded in return, eyes occasionally glancing at you, attempting to sleep in the car, when did his life start revolving around you this much?
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Traded Posession
Dark!jacaerys x reader
A/N: I definitely did not do this request justice but I also feel like this would have to be a series if I did and I probs should finish a series before I start a new oneđ
Pt 2 here
TW: DUBCON, smut, semi public sex, degration, talks of death, size kink
word count: 1,656 words
They call you a witch, all of them. How else would an unremarkable peasant girl get the attention of Aemond Targaryen? You spend your days at his side, bathed in blood as you lick his dagger clean. Youâre his perfect accomplice. You like to think that he cares for you, loves you even but in this moment, you realize just how wrong you are.
The Kinslayer has fled Kingâs Landing and Prince Jacaerys has claimed it. He leaves you behind like a toy that he has tired of.
The next few days are a blur. Cregan Starkâs
men are the ones to find you after your
failed attempts to escape the city. In hindsight, it was silly to think youâd make it to Harrenhall anyhow, make it to your lover. After you are arrested, they promptly throw you into the dungeon, the dungeon where you have been left to rot for the past few days.
This is when you truly realize that heâs not coming for you. Heâs. Not. Saving. You. And you were an idiot to think otherwise.
Youâre getting close to having been left alone too long with your thoughts when the door to your cell clangs open. Two guards walk in and lift you under each arm, to your feet.
âHey! What are you doing?â You ask, happy to be taken out of the dungeon but unsure if itâs out of the frying pan and into the fire.
âHis Grace has summoned your presence.â The guard on the left says as they drag you to the throne room.
When you arrive, the doors are thrown open and you stumble in, the guardsâ pace much quicker than your own. You come to a halt and someone says, âYou stand in the presence of the Dragon Prince, Jacaerys, Heir to the Iron Throne and future Protector of the Realm.â
Jacaerys Velaryon stares down at you from the Iron Throne, a cold gaze in his eyes. âKneel.â He commands and when you donât immediately obey, your legs are kicked out at the joint and you fall to your knees. He just looks at you for a moment. âYouâre much plainer than I had suspected.â He comments offhandedly.
âSorry to disappoint.â You say with a grimace.
A hand strikes you across the face. âYou will use the proper honourifics when you address the prince, whore.â The guard on the right spits out at you.
âThereâs no need for that at the moment, Ser.â Jacaerys says and then smirks. âActually, iâll have the room cleared.
âYour Grace.â The guards bow and then exit the room dutifully.
âI was truly pleased when we captured you, girl. I had this whole plan to trade you to my traitor of an uncle just to make him watch as I burned you alive insteadâŠâ He trails off. Itâs almost like heâs telling you a story rather than describing your fate. âIt was all going to be proper vengeance for my brother. Though, youâre not nearly as innocent as he was, are you?â The way he speaks is so casual that it could almost unnerve you, if it wasnât for your experience with one bloodthirsty Targaryen already. âImagine my surprise when I send a messenger to him and the boy returns, cockless, with a note that says I can keep you.â
You try not to let the hurt show on your face. After all youâve done for him, Aemond couldnât give a shit whether you live or die.
âAhh disappointed, are you? So am I.â He says simply. âI was actually so terribly disappointed that I found that sweet little village youâre from and burnt it down instead.â
The blood drains from your face. âW-What?â
âYou were not useful to me so I burnt your fucking village to the ground.â
You donât feel like the powerful woman you were at Aemondâs side at this point. You donât even know how you feel. Your silence reflects your shock.
âIs that all you can show your future king, a blank stare? The more I look at you, the more I canât believe how the cyclops was so beguiled. Youâre nothing.â He says with a cruel disappointment.
You stare him down, angrily now and you spit on the ground in front of you.
âAre you trying to prove something to me, wench? All I can see is that you are perhaps a bit more reckless than an average peasant. Do you care for your life at all?â He asks, like he thinks youâre stupid.
âYes, your Grace.â You say, thinking it would be unwise to lie. Spitting at his feet was unwise as well but perhaps pride is your fatal flaw⊠perhaps.
âCome here.â He says, beckoning you with his fingers. You follow his command, stopping at his feet. He points down. âKneel.â You feel inclined to disobey, Aemond liked that defiance but this man is harder to read, frightening in a different way.
âI plead your mercy, my prince.â Grovelling usually is the safest bet.
âYou really cannot decide how to act, can you? I intend to find your purpose.â He grabs you by the chin and tilts your head up. âLetâs start with the most logical.â He unbuckles his belt and you know exactly what he desires.
The prince is well endowed, you know it before he releases himself, but you could not have expected him to be this sizable. He laughs at your reaction. âJudging by the look on your face, Aemondâs cock is small.â
Not small. You think to yourself. But compared to thisâŠ
âI donât doubt that you know what to do. I trust you wonât try anything stupidâ He says seriously.
Stupid like biting his cock off.
Heâs right though, you do know what to do, taking him in your mouth as much as you can and beginning to suck, you quickly realize Jacaerys is bored. You speed up your movements, just the way Aemond used to like it. The quick pace usually is pleasing to most men⊠you thought, but the way the prince slumps back in his throne says otherwise. He examines one of the swords next to him in a distant sort of interest and after a few moments, he grips your hair and pulls you off.
âI see now why he didnât come back for you. Youâre like a broken toy.â
You just gaze up at him from under your lashes. âItâs how he liked it.â
Jace scoffs. âWhat a surprise. You have no technique. I suppose you can learn. I expected youâd be a fully trained pet but oh well.â He brings your head close again. âGo slower this time.â He tells you and you do, taking the head into your mouth and beginning to suckle like a little lamb. âBetter.â
You lick up his shaft and then try to take him fully into your mouth again. He never completely fits but you bring your hand up to aide yourself. He guides your movements, pulling on your hair back and forth. You gag almost every time but it would be pretty much impossible not to with how big he is. Though he seems to get off on both, itâs more the motions than your suffering that brings him pleasure.
âGood. Now get up.â He says as he pulls you off again. He stands as well and though heâs not as tall as aemond, heâs still taller than you. âBend over.â
âOver what, your Grace?â
He sighs and rolls his eyes, like youâre more of a nuisance than anything. He then swiftly grabs you by the waist and manhandles you so youâre bent over the iron throne. Though, you make yourself pliable for him.
âYou would think that as a prince, I wouldnât have to do all this work.â He rucks up your skirts and tugs down your smallclothes. He sees your folds glistening with wetness. âOh gods, you like all this? What a pretty little cunt you have.â He says as he rubs his hand through it. âLetâs see if itâs enough to truly make a man cunt-struck.â He then slips himself inside of you, so slowly that you think that it makes it hurt more rather than less.
âAh-ahâŠâ you whimper out once heâs fully sheathed inside of you.
âI almost didnât think Iâd get it all the way in.â He laughs a little before beginning to thrust lazily. âMaybe this was the only reason he kept you around. It wasnât enough though, was it? He still abandoned his little whore.â He chuckles and begins to thrust a little harder now. âNothing to say? You were so confident at the cyclopsâs side you seemed to have lots to say then.â
âMy princeâŠâ you moan as he hits that sweet spot inside of you, his thick cock filling you up deliciously.
âSay my name when I fuck you.â
âMmm, Jacaerys.â You whine out as his hands come to your hips, his thrusts making you unsteady.
âPerhaps Iâll keep you around. Make you my little fuck toy.â His thrusts get quite rough now. Heâs angry and taking it out on you. And you could swear that his thrusts are so deep that his cock is in your tummy. You feel his fingertips on your pearl.
âPlease, Jacaerys.â You beg him for release.
âBegging now? Gods maybe my stupid fucking uncle just enjoyed how pathetic you are, but you donât care about him now, do you? Youâre my whore now.â His hips keep slamming against yours and his words make you hit your peak, the possession of them enticing you. The way you constrict around him has the young prince hitting his peak as well. He spills his seed deep inside you and then immediately pulls out.
âIâm going to my chambers. Iâll have you bathed and delivered there in an hour.â He says before descending the steps and leaving you there, slumped over the iron throne.
taglist (comment to be added): General: @valeskafics @urmomsgirlfriend1 @girlwith-thepearlearring @darylandbethfanforever9 @lovellies @juhdoche @papichulo120627 @watercolorskyy
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THE ENGINEER | MCU X FORMULA ONE CROSSOVER
INTRODUCTION
summary: where mick schumacher and viviana stark are best friends, unbeknownst to most.
pairing: undecided for now, but f1 drivers x oc
author's note: hello everyone! this is my first time writing about f1, so I'm kinda nervous in posting this. btw this idea came to me after I rewatched iron man 2 and realized that the movie had tony driving the track in monaco so yeah đđthere will be more parts depending on the reception this part gets
warnings: mentions of the iron man 2 kidnapping (does this count as a spoiler)
viviana stark's instagram
liked by tonystark, starkindustries, mickschumacher and 49932292 others
vivstark: happy birthday to my best friend in the world đ words cannot describe how much i miss you but i hope to see you soon mickey!
tagged: mickschumacher
comments
user1: MICK AND VIVIANA?? SINCE WHEN??
âł user2: theyâve been best friends since birth basically đđ their dads are friends and they grew up spending time with each other
âł user2: and iâm pretty sure tony stark had a hand in building mickâs first kart when he was younger
âł user3: IMAGINE GETTING TO SAY THAT TONY STARK BUILT YOUR KART?
user4: VIVIANA STARK NEW WAG?
user5: WHY DIDNâT WE KNOW ABOUT THIS SOONER?
âł user6: they both said in older interviews that whenever theyâd been out together, there was always speculation that they were dating and it was getting pretty annoying for the both of them so they started hanging out in secret
user7: CAN VIVIANA COME TO THE PADDOCK?
âł user8: OMGGG that would be so good
âł user9: tbh, i highly doubt it'll happen. ever since tony stark got kidnapped at the monaco track, there have been no appearances from any starks only reps for the company
starkindustries: i see a certain statue of the greatest superhero ever đ
âł vivstark: okay who taught my dad how to use emojis? also who let him have the company instagram just so he can post this? was it you peterparker?
âł peterparker: i had no idea he even knew what they were vivstark
âł tonystark: how old do you guys think i am? vivstark peterparker
âł vivstark: oh you don't want us to answer that
âł peterparker: what she said ^
âł user10: LIVING FOR THIS INTERACTION
mickschumacher: miss you v đ
âł vivstark: miss you too mickey đ
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Chapter 12- I Love You. I Know.
Summary: As the end of October approaches, you and Javi learn more about celebrating Halloween and Dia De Los Muertos together. After a sleepless night, and a Halloween party at the Murphy's, Javi begins to open up to you about his past.
Word Count: 15.6K (I'm sweating)
Warnings: SMUT (18+), unprotected p in v sex (don't be silly, wrap your willy), oral (m receiving), vaginal fingering, creampie, praise kink, semi-public sex (Oh the poor Murphy's...), PTSD/Anxiety around grief, loss and Javi's past, some angst/tension, mentions of drinking/being drunk (Steve is getting PLASTERED), mentions of food/eating, SO MANY STAR WARS REFERENCES, literally this chapter made me sob while I was writing it, editing it, and re-reading it, I am SO sorry
A/N: You guys. Holy shit. This chapter really had me in my feels. This chapter was def a labor of love, but I'm really happy with how it turned out!! Thank you for as always for all you kind words, you truly, truly, TRULY have no idea how much your support means to me đđ Also please don't kill me after you finish reading this chapter I PROMISE *things* are happening so soon I can literally taste it, but I needed for this chapter to happen first, and you would be silly to think that *things* didn't get its own whole ass chapter and I am just as excited as you AH
Series Masterlist Next Chapter Previous Chapter
The excitement of Octoberâs conclusion was in the air, and the joys of getting to celebrate what you hoped would be the first of many holidays with Javi was at the forefront of your mind. While the end of summer meant school was here and your carefree days were gone until next June, October meant it was time for one of your favorite holidays- Halloween. It was one of your most cherished things to celebrate as a kid, and even still as an adult. The memories of jumping into leaf piles off your swingset with your brothers, dressing up in goofy, homemade costumes to trick-or-treat (because your mom was not about to buy 4 new sets of costumes every single year), carving pumpkins, and stealing as many of your brotherâs Kit Kat bars as you could without getting caught, filled your heart with a warmth and joy that you couldnât quite describe. While the 80 degree temperatures and lack of bright reds and yellows painted across the leaves falling from their trees was much different from the Chicago Octobers you were accustomed to, it hadnât stopped you from heading full steam into Halloween.Â
âSo do you have any thoughts on what we should be for Steve and Connieâs? I have no problem going out to buy stuff for costumes, but I can already hear my mom yelling at me for wasting my money on cheaply made clothes Iâm gonna wear for 5 hours when I have something perfectly good in my closet.â You rolled your eyes as you shuffled through the hangers, Javi sitting on the edge of your bed folding the laundry you were working on putting away.Â
The two of you had gladly accepted the invitation from Steve and Connie to spend the weekend with them in San Antonio, as the Murphyâs planned to host a Halloween party at their house for their friends and co-workers, giving you and Javi a chance to have a fun weekend out of town together.Â
âHmmmm?â He asked, looking up at you as you grabbed a few shirts, examining them for costume potential. âWeâre dressing up for this thing?âÂ
âYeah, thatâs like, the whole point of Halloween, dummy.â You giggled, throwing a few options on the floor before making your way over to your pants. âDidnât you dress up as a kid for Halloween?âÂ
Unlike yourself, Javi had spent his whole life celebrating DĂa de los Muertos, Halloween having nowhere near as much relevance to him as it did to you, spending the end of October and first days of November gathering with his family to spend the day making Pan de Muerto (Day of the Dead sweet bread), watching the parades on the streets of Downtown Laredo before visiting the cemetery where his grandparents were buried, decorating their graves in cempasĂșchil (marigold flowers), candles and photographs with his primos (cousins). Since his mom had passed, Javi hadnât been home to celebrate with his family, and had almost forgone the tradition completely during his time in Colombia, the pain and loss of his mother and the solemn sadness of celebrating alone leading him to try his best to forget about the holiday all together.Â
âUh, no, not, not really. Didnât really do Halloween, isnât really as much of a thing down here. My family always celebrated DĂa de Los Muertos instead.â He replied, almost embarrassed by his answer, not wanting to damper your excitement as you dug through your closet for costumes.Â
Your heart sank to your stomach, feeling awful that you hadnât even taken into consideration that Javi's traditions around this time of year were completely different from what you were used to. The two of you had never really talked about how you wanted to celebrate future holidays, and always had wanted to make sure that the important parts of your lives were celebrated equally. Javi hadnât said anything after you had spent the past few days putting up Halloween decorations around your apartment, and now you felt like an idiot assuming he had spent his whole life celebrating just like you.Â
âOh⊠Shit. Javi, Iâm so sorry, if you donât wanna do costumes, we donât have to, you just hadnât said anything about DĂa de Los Muertos so I just assumed that-âÂ
âBaby, itâs okay.â He pushed himself up off the bed, the width of his broad palms wrapping around your hips, trying to ease the guilt he could tell was rapidly consuming you. âYouâre right, I never told you about it. Itâs been a long time since Iâve done anything to celebrate it, and I havenât been home for it since Iâve gotten back from Colombia. I just- I donât really know how to feel about it, I guess. The last time I did anything for it was before my mom died. I was never able to bring myself to do anything about it while I was gone, and I guess now I just feel really shitty that was the way I decided to handle it.â It broke your heart to see the pain in his eyes, pulling yourself closer to him as you wrapped your arms around his stomach, leaning your head against his chest. It was then, the realization had hit you too- This would be your first year of holidays without Patrick. You didnât know as much as you would have liked to about DĂa de Los Muertos, but you did know that it was to celebrate the lives of loved ones youâd lost, a feeling that you and Javi were both all too familiar with.Â
âListenâŠâ You raised your head, looking up at him, arms still intertwined around his waist. âI donât- I donât wanna make you do anything that youâre uncomfortable with. I guess this is the first time weâve ever really talked about this kind of stuff. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you, Jav, and that means celebrating the things that are special to both of us. The things that are important to you are important to me too. I want our lives for us, for our future family, to be filled with all the things we care the most about, whether that means keeping old traditions or making our own new ones. It would mean a lot to me to get to celebrate DĂa de los Muertos with you, and if itâs okay, I would love to sprinkle in some Halloween too, because Iâm fucking dying to carve a pumpkin.âÂ
You smiled up at him as his hand slid under your jaw, his thumb tracing across your cheek as he tried his best to hold back the tears welling in his eyes. It took everything in him to not ruin his plans, wanting to run into the bedroom, grab the ring out of his sock drawer and propose to you that very instant. Even after all this time, Javi still couldn't believe that he was the person you wanted to share the rest of your life with. That you wanted to intertwine your past, present, and future with his, to have a life, a family, together that the two of you could cherish forever. Never in a million years had he assumed heâd be anywhere close to where he was today, holding the worldâs most beautiful, perfect woman in his arms, as she told him how she wanted nothing more than to build a family and spend the rest of her days with him.Â
âOsita⊠I fucking love you so much, you know that?â He leaned in, his lips meeting yours in a soft and deep kiss, your heart racing as he pulled you in tighter.Â
âYeah, I mean, I guess, just a little bitâŠâ You giggled, poking fun at him, considering not a day had passed since the first night he had said it that Javi hadnât told you just how much he loved you.Â
âShut up, you dork.â He chuckled, making you squeal as he picked you up, playfully shaking you in his grasp before setting you back down. âIâd love nothing more, Hermosa. I donât know how the fuck youâre supposed to carve a pumpkin or what the hell you have planned for these costumes, but Iâm all in. I want it all with you, Osita. Thank you.âÂ
âOf course. For as much or as little as you want to do for DĂa de los Muertos, Iâm all in too. Iâm gonna be honest, I love Hallowen. Not as much as Christmas, but itâs a close second. It means youâre gonna have to trust me with a giant ass knife and cover yourself in pumpkin guts, though.â
âMy trust is quickly starting to fade. Seriously though, what the hell are we supposed to dress up as?â He raised an eyebrow at you, nodding over to the pile of clothes you had pulled from your closet, now piled on the floor.Â
âDonât worry, Iâve got some ideas.âÂ
  The weeks leading up to the holidays had made for fun at home date nights, the both of you genuinely looking forward to learning about the traditions you had both held so dear to your hearts. Almost every night after work, you had done something to celebrate the events leading up to the day. You had shown Javi a few of your favorite Halloween movies, including Itâs the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, Beetlejuice, and Ghostbusters, very adamantly insisting to him that those movies were about as scary as you were going to get, blaming your brothers for scarring you after forcing you to watch The Exorcist at the ripe age of 7 years old. In addition to the movies, you had told him about other funny Trick-Or-Treating stories from your childhood, Javiâs favorite being how your brothers, (being the ruthless idiots they were) paid one of their friends in all of their halloween candy to jump out of a bush dressed as a terrifying old lady to scare the absolute shit out of you, and making you quite literally pee your pants. In return Javi shared his favorite memories of cooking in the kitchen with his mom as she made Pan de Muertos for his family, the two of you even attempting to make it one of the nights after work, milling about the kitchen together as Javi told you about his family you had yet to meet, or had passed away long before you.Â
After a lengthy hunt, you were able to find pumpkins, bringing them to Chuchoâs house to carve them since you had nowhere to put them inside your apartment. You offered him the rest of your Pan de Muertos in exchange for a place to work on your pumpkins, and while he gladly accepted the bread, the three of you knew Chucho was always happy to have you and Javi over, regardless.Â
âSo tell me, mija,â Chucho spoke in between mouthfuls of sweet bread, rocking back and forth in his chair, âis there a meaning behind carving the pumpkins, or is it just for fun?âÂ
âJust for fun! Okay, it looks like weâre ready, you want me to show you how to do it, or just let you go for it?â You smiled at Javi, the two of you sitting cross legged on Chuchoâs porch, pumpkins open in front of you.Â
âYou just scoop them out, right?â Javi questioned, looking into the pumpkin with an unsure grimace. âIt seems like there's a lot in here, Osita. I have to get all of it out?âÂ
âYeah, or else you canât see the design when you carve it. Câmon you big baby, just stick your hand in there and pull the guts out!â You laughed, digging your hand into your pumpkin, scooping out hearty globs of pumpkin guts, slopping them into the bucket Chucho had set out for you. Reluctantly, Javi joined, you and Chucho both absolutely dying at Javiâs face as his hand met the squishy fibers inside his pumpkin.Â
âJesus, that feels fucking gross!â He laughed, shaking his head as he threw some of the seeds and strings into the trash next to him.Â
âYou need me to do it for you?â You giggled, flicking a pumpkin seed at him as he winced with the second handful he pulled out.Â
âNo, cabrĂłn (asshole), I can do it.â Javi grumbled as he rolled his eyes at you, the both of you scooping hearty handfuls of goop.Â
âYou hear that, Chucho? Calling me an asshole because heâs too scared to pull out pumpkin guts.â You looked back at his dad, giving him a playful grin, his smile already wide from the enjoyment of watching the two of you. With your back turned to Javi, you hadnât noticed the small handful of seeds he had collected in his hand, lining up his arm to aim right at the back of your head. âI canât believe that- HEY!â You whipped your neck around, running your hand over the back of your neck, picking seeds and strings out of your hair, seeing Javi snicker to himself as your jaw dropped open in shock. âDid you seriously just throw pumpkin guts at me?!âÂ
âI donât know what youâre talking about, must have been a ghost.â He shrugged, smirking to himself before digging his hand back into his pumpkin.Â
âYou see this?!â You looked back at Chucho, pointing your finger at Javi, pretending to be stern, although your laughter quickly escaped. âAbsolutely ridiculous, I swear.âÂ
âJavier, that is no way to treat your future esposa! (Wife) No quiero mis nietos ser cubierto en calabaza! Me encantĂĄran en cualquier caso, pero todavĂa! (I donât want my future grandchildren covered in pumpkin! I will love them either way, but still!)â Chucho scolded with a smirk, you and Javi silently smiling to each other at the thought of one day doing this with your own children. Javi had tried to stop fighting off his dadâs comments about grandkids a while ago- Chucho knew just as well as the two of you that he would have his grandchildren soon enough.Â
âElla lo pĂdo⊠(She asked for itâŠ)â Javi muttered under his breath, shooting his gaze up at you as he felt cold goop hit the side of his cheek, wiping the pumpkin you had just thrown at him off with the back of his hand, watching you smirk silently to yourself as you continued to scoop out your pumpkin.
âAhora⊠Estamos a mano. (And now⊠Weâre even.)âÂ
The 3 of you chatted on the porch, the sky now painted a dark black, filled with twinkling constellations above as you finished carving your pumpkins. Yours, a cute ghost with a little smiley face, and Javiâs, what he had tried to convince you and Chucho was also a ghost, even though it looked more like he had just carved a squiggly hole in the middle of his. It took a little prodding and convincing, but as you all talked about how the Peña family had spent many a DĂa de los Muertos, you and Chucho were able to get Javi to agree to go visit his momâs gravesite on the Sunday after you got back from Steve and Connieâs party. Chucho had even promised to keep his tias, tios, and primos (aunts, uncles, and cousins) completely out of the picture this year, wanting to give Javi all the time and space he needed to go see his mom for the first time since her funeral. He was reluctant at first, riddled with the guilt of leaving her unvisited all these years, but as he felt the gentle squeeze of your hand, your silent reassurance was all he needed to know that you would be by his side, every step of the way. As you said your goodbyes, Chucho hugged you just a little extra tighter than normal, as if to thank you for everything you had done for his son, and just how thankful he was to have you in his life, too.Â
Even though the Murphyâs had very graciously offered to let you and Javi stay on Friday night as well as Saturday, both Steve and Connie very much understood when you had told them on the phone that the only thing that you wanted to do after coming home from the chaos of managing an elementary school Halloween party was take a very, very long nap. You and Javi had spent the night ordering pizza and watching Young Frankenstein, only lasting about 20 minutes into the movie before you were dead asleep, snoring against Javiâs chest, still dressed in If You Give A Mouse A Cookie costume from earlier today. Carrying you to bed and undressing you from your mouse ears and oversized overalls, Javi curled into bed next to you, pulling your body against his as he stared at the ceiling. Despite how hard he tried to fall asleep, he laid there, wide awake as ever, as his head raced with the tornado of thoughts brewing inside his brain.Â
Javier Peña had never really considered himself to be an anxious person. For most of his life, he couldnât be. For the sake of his job, the sake of his family after his Mom passed, Javi had survived the only way he had known how- Block it out, and ignore it. And so far, that strategy had seemed to bode for him pretty darn well. But that was before he had anyone who depended on him, cared about him, anyone who made his life worth living for. That was before he had met you. Now, Javi found himself at the crossroads of a moment he had been waiting for since the moment he had first laid eyes on you. Something that brought him absolute joy and sheer terror at the same time- Javier Peña was going to propose to you, and he was an anxious fucking mess.Â
If that in itself wasnât enough, things at the Laredo County Sheriff's Department had been an absolute shit show. Mexico was the only thing on anyoneâs radar, making for long days and high tension at the office, trying to do anything to slow the spread of the cartelâs influence across the border. Day after day, report after report, it felt like the department was drowning in the endless shitty news of new death tolls, record breaking trafficking stats, and lack of control as cocaine moved across the Rio Grande at a groundbreaking pace. Even though he found himself even further removed from Mexico than he ever was in Colombia, he couldnât help but feel that painful, searing wrench in his gut when he sat down to really think about it.Â
You.Â
Spending your lives together.
Having a family.
Protecting his wife and kids.Â
The things he would do to keep you safe.
The terrible things he had done he had justified were keeping other people safe.Â
The imagines of the things he wish he could unsee.
The pain and hurt he wished he could take back.Â
The fear of what he was capable of doing.Â
So with a knot in his chest from work, a ring hidden away in his sock drawer, and the beginnings of a plan to ask the woman he loved more than life itself to marry him, Javi coped with the weight of his stress the only way he knew how. He couldnât fucking sleep.Â
The thoughts played in his mind on repeat, torturing him with every loop around his brain. He tried his best to close his eyes, to empty his head for a moment of peace, but no matter how much he wished he could have willed himself to sleep, it was no use. By the time the alarm clock on his nightstand read 2:05 AM, Javi had completely given up on the idea of rest for the night, quietly making his way out of bed to go wander around the living room. It wasnât long before you too were also awake, rolling over in your sleep to find Javiâs space in the bed cold and empty. Rubbing your eyes and propping yourself up against your pillow, you scanned around the darkness of your room as you came to, realizing that Javi was nowhere to be found. Draping one of the blankets from your bed over you, you crept into the hallway, greeted by the soft light of one of the living room lamps painting shadows against the wall.Â
âJavi, are you up?â Your voice still soft and sleepy, rubbing your hand along your face, squinting from the sudden brightness that lit up the room.Â
âOsita, baby, did I wake you up? I'm so sorry. Go back to bed, okay?â Javi shot up from the couch, setting down whatever book he had been half focused on reading as he watched your bed headed figure meander into the living room.Â
âNo, itâs okay.â You grumbled, holding out your blanket covered arms for Javi to melt his body into yours, wrapping you in a tight hug. You pressed your head into the bare skin of his chest, snaking your hands around his waist as he planted his lips against the the top of your head, burying his nose in your tangled hair. âBaby, whatâs going on? Why canât you sleep? Iâm worried about you, Jav.âÂ
âIâm⊠Yeah, Iâm okay, Hermosa. Just a lot on my mind.â He sighed, his exhale still buried in your hair as he savored the smell of you, still lingering even in your sleepy state.Â
His pause alone was enough to know okay wasnât the word that you would use to describe Javi right now. His words were burdened and fatigued, making it clear that whatever was on his mind was weighing on him more heavily than he wanted to admit.Â
âAre you sure? Javi, if you wanna talk about anything, you know Iâm always here, right?âÂ
You wanted so desperately to pry. Everything in you had a feeling that whatever was keeping him up were entangled in the parts of his dark parts past, the last secrets holding up the final wall between the two of you. You knew from your brothers how hard it was to talk about the pain and suffering they had witnessed, and begging them to talk about it before they were ready only seemed to make it worse. Hell, after Patrick died, it felt like you didnât sleep for weeks, and it had taken you months to open up about it. You knew Javi hurt, and as much as you wanted to, digging deeper into the things that plagued him in his restless nights wasnât what he needed right now. Right now, he just needed someone to be there for him.Â
âIs there anything I can do, Javi? I just wanna help.â The breath of your sympathetic whispers were hot against Javiâs skin, squeezing your arms to pull him as close to you as he could. He paused for a moment, letting out another deep breath as cradled the back of your head with his palm, running his hands through your hair.Â
âWill- Will you stay up with me? Just a little bit longer?â His voice trembled as you turned your head to lock your eyes with his, the gentle nod of your head bringing him a moment of relief.Â
âOf course, baby. Of course Iâll stay up with you. Do you wanna turn on the TV or put on a movie? Sometimes that helps me sleep.â You stretched your arms over your head, scrunching your face as you yawned before tugging your blanket tighter around your body.Â
âBelieve me, Hermosa, I know it does.â He let out a soft chuckle as he pressed a soft kiss against your forehead.Â
âOh shit, yeah that is true. I donât even think I made it halfway through Young Frankenstein tonight, which is a crime. Itâs such a good movie. I donât even remember getting into bed.â You yawned again, this time taking one of your blanket covered fists to try and rub the sleep out of your eyes, forcing yourself to stay awake.Â
âWell, if you give a mouse pizza and a movie after a long day at school, then sheâll probably need her boyfriend to carry her to bed because sheâs so tired.â Now awake enough, Javiâs cute jab at your costume for school made you let out a little giggle, giving him a little shove with your blanket wrapped body. âWhy donât we turn the rest of it on, so you can finish watching?âÂ
âI donât wanna fall asleep on you, Javi.â You grumbled, pouting up at him, considering he had just asked you to stay awake with him.Â
âItâs okay. As long as I have you by me, Iâll be alright, I promise.â Reluctantly, you nodded in agreement, plopping yourself on the couch as Javi turned on the TV, rewinding the VHS tape to the point where you had fallen asleep earlier before joining you, draping his arm around your shoulder as you tucked in your knees and scooted closer to him. You sat for a few minutes in silence, letting the sounds of the movie fill the background. As you turned your head to look up at Javi, you could tell that even though his eyes were pointed at the screen, there was no way he was really watching the movie. Reaching up your hand, you ran your fingers across the length of his strong jaw, his stubble scratching against your palm, forcing him to look back at you. Your eyes met his, the sweet, chocolate brown looking back at you, with a confusing mix of exhaustion, guilt, want and helplessness. You brought your face closer to his, your lips now only inches apart as your whispers danced against his mouth, desperate to find something to ease his pain.Â
âWhat do you need, Javi? Whatever you need, Iâll give it to you.âÂ
His tongue swept against his bottom lip, taking one last shaky breath before his words left his body with his exhale.Â
âYou. I need you.âÂ
His hands found their way to the bare skin of your thighs, his fingertips barely brushing against your flesh as he traced his way up to your torso, toying with the hem of one of his shirts that always looked so much better on you than him. Pressing his palm against the soft curves of your stomach, he tugged at the waistband of your sleep shorts, causing you to shift your body so he could slide them down your legs. Reaching over towards his lap, you grasped at his boxers, feeling him already half hard under the fabric as you rubbed your hand against him. Javi held your hips, slowly guiding you to straddle him as you kicked your shorts off your feet, leaving them in a pile on the ground. Slowly, you began to grind deeper into his lap, the feeling of him now fully hard beneath you. Gently prompting you to raise your arms over your head, Javi lifted your shirt, leaving you bare as he dropped it next to your shorts.Â
âIs this okay?â Javi rasped, pressing languid kisses against your neck and collarbone as you ran your hands against the width of his broad shoulders.Â
âOf course, baby.â Your reply low and horse as you began to drag the fabric of his boxers lower and lower, finally letting his cock spring free as his waistband pushed past. You brought your palm to your mouth, licking a long, wet strip across it before wrapping it around his length, thumbing over the precum already leaking from his tip. Javi tilted his head against the back of the couch as you twisted your wrist, stroking his cock, letting out a hushed moan before sitting back up to watch you.Â
âYouâre fucking perfect, Osita. I donât deserve you.â He dug his fingertips into the soft flesh of your ass, his sweet, brown eyes locked on yours as you pressed against him, nibbling at his ear.Â
âYou deserve everything, Javi. I could give you everything in the world and it still wouldnât be enough.â Javi grasped at your face, cupping your cheeks as he pressed his lips against yours in a deep, intense kiss, his voice shaky and lustful as his mouth parted with yours before he spoke.Â
âI donât need anything besides you, Osita. Eres mi todo. EstĂĄs todo lo que necesito. (You are my everything. Youâre all Iâll ever need.) He shuttered, letting out a low groan as you continued to rub your hand along his length, Javi now reaching down to trace lazy circles around your clit before dipping his fingers inside your wet heat. His fullness made you whimper, wrapping tighter around his cock as you stroked him, now bucking your hips against his hand as his fingers curled, bumping against the spongy spot that made you lose control. âDoes that feel good, sweet girl? Fuck, youâre so wet.Â
âMhmmmmm.â You gasped, rapidly nodding your head as his digits pulsed inside you, your cunt already drenched, desperate to feel the fullness of his dick, despite the thickness of his fingers. Carefully, you lifted your hips, moving yourself closer to him as you ran your fingers through the soft ends of his sleepy curls. Sitting up on your knees, Javi removed his hand as he watched you hover over him, his palms roaming to your hips as you guided his tip through your folds, collecting your arousal before lining him up with your entrance. His jaw went slack as you lowered down on to him, taking your time as you savored the stretch of every sweet inch until you had bottomed out at his base.Â
âFuckkk, baby.â He mewled, gently guiding his hands against your hips as you dragged yourself up along his length before headfully sinking back down, the tip of his cock bumping against your cervix with each movement. Javi nipped at your neck, trailing hot, wet kisses down your collarbone before stopping at your breasts, flicking this tongue along each of your pebbled nipples as you pushed deeper into his lap, whimpering at his touch. âMy sweet girl, always taking me so well, like you were fucking made for me, baby. God, youâre so fucking gorgeous.â Javi pulled you in tighter, caging his chest against yours as his arms wrapped around the small of your back as he rested his face in the crook of your neck. âFuck, I love you so much, Osita.â His words were desperate and needy against your bare skin, digging your fingers into his dark curls as you swirled your hips around his cock.Â
âI love you too, Javi. More than anything.â You moaned as felt Javi shift his weight, thrusting upwards as he buried himself deep inside you. His fullness had you digging your nails into the nape of his neck, your body melting into his with each push and pull against each other. You could feel the all too familiar tingle creeping up your legs and through the base of your spine as Javiâs hand found its way to circle around your clit, already throbbing as the curled hair around his base brushed against your sensitive nerves. The lewd noises of your moans and tangled bodies drowned out the sounds of the TV behind you, practically hearing how wet you were as Javi cock slipped in and out of your heat, his pace pounding as he punched into you. You could feel your walls beginning to tighten around him, arousal pooling in your belly, Javi knowing you were close as you whimpered into the crook of his neck. âFuck baby, donât stop- ahhhh- please donât stop, Iâm so close.âÂ
âI know, baby, I know. Let go for me, Osita. Wanna feel you soak my lap before I fuck you full of me. Cum for me baby, itâs okay, Iâve got you.â Javiâs fingers rubbed faster along your clit as you rolled your hips, sinking yourself deeper onto his cock with each thrust, your vision going white as you could feel yourself come undone.Â
âJavi, Javi- fuck- Javi, Jav-ahhhhhh.â You could feel yourself gush around him, crying out his name as you reached your high, your legs shaking and fingers digging into his skin, pleasure flowing through your veins.Â
âThatâs it, Hermosa. Fuck, baby, Iâm gonna cum too, fuck myself so deep inside you. My perfect girl. Mierda- Quiero que seas mĂo para siempre, mi amor. Solo tĂș, por siempre y para siempre. (Shit- I want you to be mine forever, my love. Only you, forever and always). Fuck me, I- fuckkkk.â Javi hissed as he buried himself deep in your hilt, spilling every drop of his spend against your walls. You could feel the mixture of the both of you dripping down your thighs, soaking Javiâs lap as you slumped into his body, your heart racing as the damp curls of his hair pressed against your shoulder. You both sat there for a moment, letting your chests rise and fall together in sync as you came to. âFuck me, Osita. I could stay like this forever, baby.â
âYou and me both. Although, I feel like that would make things awfully inconvenient for the both of us.â Your soft, sleepy giggles making Javi smile as he ran his fingers though the twisted ends of your hair. Carefully, you lifted yourself up, hissing at the loss of Javi inside you.Â
âThank you, Osita.â Javi whispered, tenderly circling his thumb along your jaw as you curled up next to him.Â
âFor what?âÂ
âJust- fuck, youâre so good to me. I donât know what Iâd do without you. So, I just- thank you. Thank you for being everything I need.â Planting a gentle kiss on your forehead, Javi pulled you tighter, holding you in his arms as you leaned against him.Â
âIâll always be here for you, Javi. I promise.âÂ
You hoped he knew. That he knew your words were true. That when the time came for him to open up to you, letting you into the painful past that loomed above him, that you wouldnât run. You would be right by his side, just as you were right now.Â
âWell good morning, Sleeping Beauty.â Javi chuckled as you twisted in the passenger seat, stretching your arms over your head, scrunching your face, letting out a lengthy yawn.Â
âFuck, how long was I asleep for? How much longer do we have left? Sorry, I wasnât planning on sleeping that long, I just wanted to take a nap for a little while we drove.â You ran your hands over your face, looking out at the bright Texas sun shining over the neat suburban neighborhood you now found yourself driving through. Javi reached over across the center console, rubbing his hand along your thigh as he chuckled to himself.Â
âBaby, I knew from the moment you fell asleep you were gonna be out for the rest of the drive, itâs okay. I was just worried I was gonna have to wake you up in the Murphyâs driveway.â You grumbled as you looked over at Javi, giving him a playful swat against his arm, shaking your head, now emerging from your post nap fog.Â
âWell if we weren't up fucking at 2:30 in the morning, perhaps I wouldnât be so tired, hmmmm?âÂ
Javi rolled his eyes as you poked fun at how the both of you had found yourselves last night, trying to ease Javiâs sleeplessness. While your solution had worked enough to ease him back to bed, it had now left you wide awake, wondering what had been going through Javiâs head, torturing him enough to keep him up. It had also meant that the two of you had slept in much longer than you intended, leaving later than planned for Steve and Connieâs. The two of you had quickly packed your things and hit the road, stopping to grab lunch on the way before you found yourself dead asleep next to Javi for the last hour and a half of your journey to San Antonio. With only a few minutes now left in your drive, you peered out the window, admiring the houses that lined the quiet streets of the Murphyâs neighborhood.Â
âThis is a cute subdivision.â You smiled over at Javi, admiring the houses, charming and inviting as they were freshly decorated from Halloween.Â
âYeah, it is pretty nice.â He grinned back, wrapping his palm around your thigh, giving your leg a little squeeze. He took a deep breath, his voice now shifting in tone, becoming more shaky and nervous. âWould you uh- would you, um, wanna live in a neighborhood like this?âÂ
âMaybe. I donât know, the houses are all really close together. I spent so much of my life in the city, and even at my house growing up, everything always felt so cramped. After coming here, especially after seeing your ranch, I donât know, I would love to be somewhere with more space. But thatâs a big ask, so, maybe one day if it works out, I guess.â You reached over, rubbing your hand along Javiâs arm, your soft smile meeting his tender gaze as he smirked, nodding to himself.Â
âYeah, one day.âÂ
Taking a last turn down one of the neighborhood streets, the two of you pulled up to the quaint two story home belonging to the Murphyâs. Turning off the ignition, Javi paused for a moment, grinning to himself as he ran the hand resting on your leg up to your face, cupping your check as his eyes roamed the length of your body, taking every inch of you in as his sweet brown eyes consumed you. âI love you, Osita.â Â
âI love you too, Jav.â Both of your heads tilted, your lips gently pressing against one anothers as you traced your hand through Javiâs dark curls, pulling him closer into you. You could feel his smile against your mouth as his tongue barely swiped against your bottom lip, the two of you so lost in the moment, you hadnât even seen Steve make his way out of the house to greet you, let alone the fact that he was now standing at the driverâs side door, hands on his hips as he watched your impromptu makeout session in Javiâs truck.Â
âYou two lovebirds want help bringinâ your bags in, or do I need to give you a minute?â Steve chuckled to himself as you and Javi shot up, hearts racing and faces going white hearing his distinct drawl and rapid tapping at the driverâs side window. Taking a deep breath to compose himself, Javi placed one more soft kiss on your forehead before promptly turning around to flip off Steve and opening the driverâs side door. âYou two are worse than a pair of horny teenagers, I swear.â You could hear Steve still snickering to himself as you exited out your side of the car, making your way over to find Javi and Steve in a tight hug, lovingly patting each other on the back.Â
âFuck off, Murph.â Javi shook his head against Steveâs embrace, pulling away to grab your two bags from the backseat.Â
âListen, Iâm not the one makinâ out in my driveway.â Steve shrugged as you sheepishly emerged from your side of the truck, smiling at you as grimaced at him.Â
âHe started itâŠâ You glanced over at Javi, you and Steve now both giggling as he pulled you in for a hug.Â
âOf course he did, wouldnât put anything past this old bastard. How ya doinâ sweetheart? Good to see the both of you, weâre really glad you guys could make it.Â
âSheâs doing great after the hour and a half nap she took on the way here.â Javi interjected, slamming the truck door behind him, slinging both of your bags over his shoulder.Â
âWhatever, you meanie. In my defense, I was not planning to sleep that long, and I think Halloween exhaustion got the best of me.â You shot Javi a quick wink, trying to bite down on your lip before turning back to face Steve.Â
âListen, I donât blame ya. Iâm fuckinâ exhausted after trick-or-treating with 3 kids, let alone tryinâ to keep âem wrangled at school all day. I love those girls, but I donât think I could've gotten them in my parents car fast enough when they came to pick âem up this morning. Here, come on in, I wonât make you stand out in the driveway all day, unless you need to make out more.âÂ
As you stepped into the Murphy home, you were greeted by an abundance of Halloween streamers and banners hanging in the living room and up the stairwell to the second floor, along with a few Barbie dolls and accessories scattered across the entryway, nearly stepping on one as you came through the door. You could smell the sweet scent of something baking in the kitchen as Connie came rushing through the hallway, arms outstretched to greet you and Javi. âOh itâs so good to see you two, thank you so much for coming!â Connie squeezed you and Javi in a tight hug before she backed away, kicking one of the toys on the floor across the room. âSorry about the Barbies, I told the girls to clean up before they left for their grandparents this morning but I think all 3 of them are still running on a sugar high from last night and that obviously didnât happen.âÂ
âThank you so much for having us! Donât worry about it at all, I totally understand! Javi was just telling me on the way over how much he was hoping the girls had Barbies he could play with anyways!â The 3 of you laughed as Javi rolled his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest as you gave him a smirk and a little nudge.Â
âFuck, I forgot how funny she was Jav.â Steve snickered to himself, picking up one of the Barbies and tossing it across the room into one of the toy baskets along the wall. âSeriously though, we are really glad you guys could make it. Your birthday party was fun as hell, old man. Glad to be close enough to actually see each other and do stuff like this again.âÂ
Before Javi would respond, you all jumped, startled by the sound of the kitchen timer beeping rapidly from the other room. âOh crap, sorry, I gotta grab the cupcakes out of the oven!â Connie grimaced apologetically, making her way back to the kitchen.Â
âDo you need any help?â You asked, excited to spend more time with Connie.Â
âOh my gosh actually if you could help with frosting the cupcakes that would be amazing. I made these yesterday for Olivia and Abbyâs class parties, and I had no idea it was gonna take so long and was worried I wasnât going to have enough time for all of them before the party! Thank you!âÂ
âOf course!â You replied, grinning at her before following her lead to the kitchen, giving a little wave as you disappeared around the hall, looking back at Steve and Javi. âHave fun, you two.âÂ
Steve paused for a moment until the both of you were out of sight, waiting to forcefully slap his hand against Javiâs chest, making him groan from the unexpected pain.Â
âWhat the fuck was that for, you jackass?â Javi winced, glaring at Steve.Â
âWhere the fuckâs the ring, man?! Steve hissed through gritted teeth, looking back at Javi in disappointment. âI thought you were gonna fuckinâ do it after you got back from Chicago and met her family?! I thought everything was all good with- oh shit, did something happen with the ho-âÂ
âShhhhhh! You fuckinâ idiot, please, talk louder, I donât think the people at the end of the street could hear you.â Javi looked around the corner, clenching his jaw, praying that you hadnât heard anything from the kitchen.Â
âIâm not that fuckinâ loud⊠Shit, what the fuck happened then?â Steve grumbled, looking over at Javi with concern.Â
âCan we maybe talk about proposal plans somewhere thatâs not right by the woman Iâm trying to propose to?â Running his thumb over his balled fists, Javiâs eyes darted back and forth, staying on the lookout for your return.Â
âFine, fine, fine. Iâll show you where the guest room is and then you can tell me.â Steve motioned up the stairs, Javi trailing behind with both your bags draped around his shoulders
âWas I really that fuckinâ loud?âÂ
ââŠHave you heard yourself talk?âÂ
âSo howâs everything been going at work? There definitely was a full moon sometime in the past week because things were crazy at the hospital, Iâm sure they had to be equally as bad at an elementary school.â You and Connie giggled as you squeezed a dollop of orange frosting onto one of the cupcakes before taking one of the little bags to pipe on eyes and a mouth to make it look like a pumpkin.Â
âOh my god, I think it must have been on Wednesday, I had a boy cut another girlâs hair with scissors and then had to call another parent because her daughter bit another kid at recess pretending to play werewolves. I felt really bad we didnât come last night, I was exhausted after our Halloween party, I fell asleep on poor Javi at like, 8 oâclock.âÂ
Although you found yourself laughing with Connie again, you couldnât help but shake the uncomfortable feeling you had in your gut as you thought about after you had woken up in the middle of the night to find Javi wide awake and distressed. You carefully set down your spatula, taking a deep breath before glancing over at Connie, still frosting next to you. âHey, uh, Connie? Can, um- Can I ask you something?â Connie immediately sensed the shift in your tone, putting down her cupcake.Â
âOf course, honey. Whatâs going on?âÂ
âDid um, did- Did Steve ever- ever talk to you? About all the stuff that happened in Colombia? I mean like, I know you were there, but I donât know. Sorry, I donât know what Iâm trying to ask, this is probably way too personal, I-â You could feel yourself shrinking, retracting in embarrassment at your overly intrusive question, unable to finish your thought before Connie cut you off, placing her hand on your shoulder.Â
âOh, honeyâŠâ Her eyes were filled with sympathy as they looked back at yours, letting out a sigh before she responded. âDid something happen?â You began to nod your head no, even though you could feel the words yes burning in your throat. You took another shaky breath, trying to hold back the tears now welling in your eyes as you spoke.Â
âNo I mean- well, yeah, I guess. Last night, I woke up and Javi wasnât in bed. He was out in the living room and I could tell that something was bothering him. I donât know- maybe it was nothing. I just- when my brothers came back from active duty, there were a lot of things that kind of just went unspoken. I knew it was hard for them to talk about. Charlie handled it okay, but my brother Patrick never wanted to talk to anyone about what happened, and it just- I donât know Connie, I donât think Javi would ever do anything stupid like he did, but- fuck- it scares me sometimes. I know Javiâs done things that heâs probably not proud of, and I get itâs part of the nature of what his job was. I donât care. I really donât. People do shitty things when theyâre put in shitty situations. But he never talks about it. Ever. Does⊠Does he not trust me? I care about him so much, Con. More than anything. I get so worried about him.âÂ
Your tears were now streaming down your cheeks, leaving your face wet as you wiped the back of your hand across your skin to try and do some form of damage control before Connie embraced you, pulling you in for a hug, tightly wrapping her arms around you. âOh sweetheart. Of course he trusts you. When Steve came back, he was a mess. I donât think it really all hit him until he was finally home. I guess youâre right, it was different because I was there, but even then, there were things that happened that I didnât know about. After begging and begging him, I finally got him to go to see someone and it really helped, but even now, thereâs times where it still creeps up on him. Honey, Javi loves you so much. I didnât think Iâd ever live to see the day he was in love as he is with you. If heâs anything like Steve, he just doesn't wanna hurt you.âÂ
You sniffled, taking a step back to wipe your nose with your sleeve, your lip trembling as you tried to keep from crying harder than you already were. âBut thatâs what hurts, Connie. It hurts me to think he has to keep this from me, like Iâm gonna think less of him for what heâs been through.âÂ
âI know. Have you talked to him about it?â Connieâs voice was gentle and sweet, rubbing her hand along your arm as she listened to what you needed to get off your chest.Â
âNo⊠I guess I should have. I never wanted to pry. I know itâs hard to talk about, I just- I wanna be there for him Connie. I donât want him to have to do it all on his own.â You shifted your gaze to the ground, guilt washing over you. After Patrick, you couldnât live with the idea of letting Javi try to suffer through his past alone. You loved him more than anything- and even the slightest thought of going through anything similar to what had happened to Patrick again with Javi was almost paralyzing.Â
âI think the best thing you can do is to go talk to him.â Looking back up, you saw Connie smiling at you, trying to convince you that everything would be okay, even if it felt like it wasnât. âWhy donât you go find him? Partyâs starting soon anyways, you can go change into your costumes and come down wherever youâre ready. Iâll be just fine with the cupcakes, tell Steve can put himself to work frosting.â The both of you grinned as you tried to wipe your tears, nodding slowly in agreement.Â
âThanks, Connie.â You whispered into her shoulder as you pulled her in for a hug before heading up the stairs to find where Javi and Steve had gone. It didnât take you long to find the pair, hearing their voices carry through the hallway from the slightly cracked door of the guest bedroom. You were about to knock and interrupt their conversation, stopping yourself with your fist barely touching the door as you tried to make out what they were talking about.Â
âThe offer was in fucking cash, too. I was trying to make it easier so I could speed up the process, but itâs been taking them so goddamn long to close on everything so I can finally go sign the fucking paperwork.âÂ
âThat fuckinâ blows, Jav. Iâm sorry. Itâs not like she knows any better, though. Itâll still be a huge fuckinâ surprise, Iâll tell you that much.âÂ
âI know. Itâs been killing me to wait this long. I just want it to be perfect, Steve. She deserves everything. Honestly, Iâm kinda glad it bought me some more time. I need to find a way to get her to see it before everythingâs official in case she fucking hates it.âÂ
âJavi. Sheâs not gonna hate it. Fuck it, tell her Connie and I are lookinâ for somethinâ and we wanted you two to go see it for us. I donât know, maybe thatâs too obvious. Speakinâ of which, I should probably go check to see if she needs anything before this party, Iâm already in the fuckinâ dog house for forgettinâ to bring the girlâs trick-or-treatinâ bags to school, I donât need to be in trouble for anything else.âÂ
What the hell were they talking about? What was Javi signing? Why was it taking so long? What the hell did it have to do with you? Wait⊠holy fuck. No way⊠Was he-Â
Before you could finish your thought, you suddenly realized Steve was making his way towards the door. You quickly rapped your fist against the wood, trying to play off the fact you had been eavesdropping and make it look like you had just unassumingly made your way upstairs, not overhearing the conversation the two were just having.Â
Knock, knock.Â
âHey, itâs me! Uh, Steve, Con wants to know if you can help her with the cupcakes really quick.â You pushed open the door, trying your best to smile at the suspicious pair as Steve shook his head, looking back at Javi.Â
âItâs always fuckinâ somethinâ. I donât even know what I did wrong this time, I swear.â Steve held up his hands defensively, sliding his way past you in the doorway before heading downstairs, leaving you standing there awkwardly, unsure how to feel after your conversation with Connie and the one you had just overheard.Â
âHey, Osita. Howâs everything goinâ down there? Sorry, we were just about to come down and- Hey, baby, you okay?â Javi stood up, concern spreading across his face from the strange scrunch in your brow as you stared at the floor.Â
âUmmmmâŠâ You froze for a moment, unsure of what to do. On the one hand, your conversation with Connie had you ready to confront Javi, to finally work up the courage to ask him about the past life he had tried his best to keep from you. But as you glanced over at him, seeing his sweet brown eyes and stupidly handsome face, remembering the discussion you had just overheard through the doorway, the other hand meant you werenât at risk of ruining your night that the two of you had been so looking forward to, and right now, the other hand was going to have to be the one you needed to play. âYeah, yeah, Iâm good, I just- I was gonna ask you something but forgot what I was gonna say. Iâm sure Iâll remember it eventually.â You smiled at Javi, neither of you completely convinced by your response. âBut um, Connie said that people are gonna start getting here soon, so we can change into our costumes if you want.â A smirk slowly stretched across your cheeks as you nodded over to the black duffle bags laying on the bed.Â
Javiâs grin matched yours quickly, grabbing your hips and pulling you closer against him as you giggled. âYou sure weâre not gonna be the only ones dressed up?âÂ
âWell considering itâs a Halloween party and I literally just talked to Connie about what she and Steve are wearing downstairs, Iâm gonna give it a pretty confident yes. Worst case, it just looks like youâre wearing a white shirt and vest, Mr. Solo. You stuck up, half-witted, scruffy looking nerf herder.â You raised your eyebrows, playfully poking at his chest. Javi paused, shaking his head at your quote, firing one right back at you as he bit down on his lip.Â
âYou just like me because Iâm a scoundrel. There arenât enough scoundrels in your life.âÂ
âI happen to like nice men.âÂ
âI am a nice man.â Â
Javi cupped your face, pulling you in for a long, heavy kiss before backing away to unpack your bags, shooting you a quick wink as you rolled your eyes. Jesus, he even found a way to make Star Wars sexy. Just when you thought you couldnât be anymore in love, Javier Peña never failed to find a way to make you realize youâd never stop falling for him.Â
After putting in what felt like the 74th bobby pin into your hair after getting the last braid wrapped over your head, you gave yourself a once over in the mirror, pleasantly surprised by how well your costume had turned out. While Javi was disappointed you were adamant you were not going as Princess Leia from Return of the Jedi and showing up in front of a group of strangers at Steve and Connieâs party in her slave costume, you and Javi both agreed that Hoth Princess Leia was definitely the next best look. Staring at you with his puppy dog eyes, Javi had been adamant about waiting with you as you finished getting ready, leaning his hip against the bathroom counter, arms crossed over his chest as he watched you finish the last of your hair and makeup.Â
âOkay, I think that should stay. All those years of braiding my hair for under my hockey helmet are finally coming in handy for something.â You snickered, pushing the final clip into your hair to hold it into place, giving yourself a once over in the mirror. As you looked yourself down, Javiâs eyes wandered up and down your body just as fast, practically undressing you as fast as you had put your costume on.Â
âGoddamn, Osita⊠Fuck, youâre so hot.âÂ
âMe? Jesus Christ, Javi. You put Harrison Ford to shame with how fucking good you look. I like Han Solo better with a mustache anyways.â You licked your tongue against your bottom lip, running your hands along the muscles of his arms, straining against the tight henley shirt he was wearing under his vest. You were no better than Javi, practically having to force yourself to not look in his general direction while you were getting ready to prevent yourself from pouncing on him. But given the lack of chatter downstairs, and the impressive speed at which the two of you had gotten ready, you really couldnât help yourself. Slowly, you let your hands begin to slip down his arms and across his chest, palming at the denim of his black jeans as he let out a deep groan.Â
âHermosaâŠâ He hissed against your neck as you grasped at the bulge now growing under his pants, your other hand now making its way down to undo his belt, the clinking of the metal drowned out by Javiâs heavy panting. You began lowering your body, sliding Javiâs pants and boxers down his thighs as his cock sprang free, his tip already red and leaking with precum. You rested on your knees, face to face with his length as you wrapped your hand around him, slowly stroking him a few times.Â
âThis okay, Captain Solo?â You batted your lashes at him, giving him a wink before letting your spit dribble onto his cock, taking his tip into your mouth and swirling your tongue around it. Curling your fingers around his base, you began to twist your wrist, hollowing out your cheeks as you took him deeper into your mouth.Â
âOh, fuck me. Holy shit, Osita.â He moaned, tilting his head back, letting his jaw go slack as your head bobbed back and forth. He gently rested his hand along the side of your face, helping to guide you along his length as you took him deeper and deeper down your throat. âJesus Christ, baby. Fuck, that feels so good. You look so hot, god fuckinâ dammit.â Javiâs words were labored and shaky as you started to increase your pace, wrapping your free hand around the back of his bare thigh, digging your fingertips into his leg. Feeling the pressure beginning to build in his stomach, Javi began rocking his hips, his jaw completely slack as he looked down at the sight of how well you took him in your mouth, saliva dribbling down your chin as sucked along his cock, hard and heavy on your tongue. âFuck, Osita. Iâm not gonna last much longer. Can I cum like this, baby? Fill up that- fuck- fill up that pretty little mouth of yours?ââÂ
You glanced up at him, nodding, your lips still wrapped around his dick, the motions of your head and wrist now becoming faster and sloppier as you watched Javiâs brow scrunch and jaw clench, a sign you knew all too well that he was moments away from coming undone.Â
âSuch a good fucking girl, taking me so well. Fuck, baby- shit- se sientes tan bien, estoy tan cercaaahhhhhh-â (you feel so good, Iâm so closeeeee-). The hot ropes of his spend coated the back of your throat, the salty, tangy mix filling your mouth as Javi whined, giving his hips one last push as kept your lips wrapped around him, making sure that you had milked him of every last drop before releasing. Letting your spit and his release fall from the corners of your lips, you wiped your mouth with the back of your hand, smirking up at Javiâs blissed out expression. âJesus Christ, Osita. Youâre too fucking good at that. Holy shit. Lemme take care of-âÂ
You held up your hand to stop him as you stood up, your gesture cutting off the rest of his sentence as you helped to pull up his jeans and boxers still resting along his thighs. âIâm allowed to give my hot ass boyfriend blowjobs without anything in return. Câmon, we better get downstairs before Steve walks in on us again.â You pressed up on your tiptoes, planting a quick kiss on Javiâs lips as he reached down to buckle his belt before the two of you tried your best to fix yourself up in the mirror to avoid the inevitable shit Steve was about to give the both of you. Giving Javi a quick nod in the mirror before turning off the light and heading out the door, he gave your ass a playful smack, making you squeal in surprise, making you turn on your heels. Resting his hand on his hip, he beamed at you, biting down on his lip.Â
âFuck, I love you.âÂ
âI know.âÂ
The Murphyâs living room had begun to pool with guests as you made your way down the stairs, looking for Steve and Connie amongst the crowd. You and Javi both grabbed a beer from the cooler at the bottom of the stairwell, quickly turning around as you heard Steveâs familiar twang approaching behind you.Â
âWell Iâll be damned. You got this motherfucker in a costume? He must really love you.â Steve chuckled, shaking Javi by the shoulders. âAnd Star Wars too?! You asshole, how many times did I try to tell you they were good fuckinâ movies?! You shoulda dressed him up like Jabba the Hut.â You and Steve cackled as Javi rolled his eyes.
âYeah, and what the fuck are you supposed to be? A sad pirate?â Javi jabbed, poking fun at Steveâs poorly put together costume.Â
âListen, Olivia and Abby both wanted to be the Little Mermaid, so we had two Arielâs, Con was Ursula, Madison was the yellow fish and I didnât wanna be that annoying ass crab, so pirate it was, asshole.â Steve retorted, punching at Javiâs arm, the two of them laughing at each other like little boys. âAlright, go enjoy yourselves lovebirds, Iâll see ya in a little bit. And Javi?â
âYeah Murph?âÂ
âYou really gotta start checkinâ your pants, buddy.âÂ
Javiâs cheeks turned red, his eyes darting down to his zipper, still all the way undone from your activities upstairs, the both of you grimacing at each other, sheepishly avoiding eye contact with Steve as he disappeared into the crowd.Â
It really wasnât a surprise to Javi how many friends the Murphyâs had already managed to make in their time since moving to San Antonio. Their house was quickly crowded with all sorts of people- Steve and Connieâs co-workers, neighbors, parents of friends Olivia and Abby had made at school, regardless of where the party goers were from, everyone had collectively agreed to make adult Halloween just as fun as any kids. You and Javi were having a great time catching up with Steve and Connie, as well as meeting some of their other close friends, one of Connieâs neighbors being an elementary school teacher, giving you two plenty to commiserate about from the hellish week it had been. It didnât take long for the party to move outside, Steve drunkenly deciding that he needed to make a bonfire, despite adamant argument that with the amount of alcohol Steve had in his system, he was going to spontaneously combust if he got close enough to a flame. Javi, sober enough to still help his friend make rational decisions, was glad that Steve was happy to let him build the bonfire.Â
âThe force is strong with you, Han Solo.â You giggled, Javi wrapping his arm around your shoulder, pressing a soft kiss into your forehead as the two of you stared into the flickering orange glow of the fire pit.Â
âNot strong enough to extinguish Steve if he got close enough to it. Hey, I got shit all over my hands, Iâm gonna go to the bathroom and wash âem off. You need anything while Iâm inside, Princess?â You smiled as you nudged Javi at the nickname he had been adamant about using since you had put on your costume.Â
âIâm good, thank you. Iâm gonna go wait over on the swingset so I donât completely reek of bonfire later.â Javi nodded as he slid his hand down your back, giving your ass a quick squeeze before making his way through the crowd, heading towards the house. Surprised no one else had capitalized on the chance to sit down, you wandered over to the wooden playset at the corner of the Murphyâs backyard, taking a seat on one of the plastic swings, kicking your feet against the grass below.Â
âHey, there she is! How goes it, Leia?â Taking a few long strides through the yard, Steve was now quickly making his way over to you, stumbling over his own feet as he somehow managed to sit himself down on the swing next to you. You tried your best not to laugh at Steveâs drunken state, but his current antics werenât making it very easy on you.Â
âI could ask the same to you. You doinâ okay there, pirate?âÂ
âFuck sweetheart, Iâm doinâ fuckinâ great. Whereâs the asshole?âÂ
âInside, Iâm sure heâll be back out soon.â You snickered at Steve watching the beer dribble down his chin from the overly confident swig he had taken.Â
âGood, I donât need âem right now. You were the one I was lookinâ for.â Steve pointed in your general direction, but clearly wasnât aware enough to hit his target head on.Â
âMe?â You laughed, pointing back to yourself.Â
âYes, you. You talk to him yet?â
âAbout?â You paused, wondering if Steve had any inkling of the conversation you were planning to have earlier, or if he was drunkenly deciding you and Javi needed to discuss something else.Â
âYou know about what. I talked to Connie earlier. I figured I owed it to you to come talk to you about it, too.âÂ
Your heart began to race, that uncomfortable feeling once again beginning to churn in your stomach as you thought about the things you and Connie had discussed earlier. âSteve, you donât owe me anything, I-âÂ
âNo, I do. Hold on a second.â Steve turned away, letting out a hearty burp, pouding on his chest before facing back towards you. âSorry, Iâve been holdinâ that in for like 10 minutes, I needed to let it out. Anyways⊠What was I sayinâ? Oh shit, yeah, the grumpy bastard. Listen, sweetheart. I know itâs gonna fuckinâ suck, but you gotta be the one to bring it up and talk to him about it. If I know anything about that motherfucker, itâs that he will bottle things up for way too fuckinâ long until someone gets it out of him. Heâs a good guy. He says heâs not, but he is. Saved my ass more times than I can count. That job made us do some fucked up shit neither of us are fuckinâ proud of. But that doesnât mean he gets to keep it from you. I swear to God, that asshole is so fuckinâ in love with you, it makes me sick. You make him so happy. He just doesnât wanna fuck up the best thing thatâs ever happened to him.âÂ
You werenât sure if it was the right thing to do, but in that moment, all you could manage was to reach over to the swing next to you, pulling Steve in for a hug as you tried to keep your tears from staining his shirt. âThanks, Steve.â You whispered, leaning back into your seat, using your sleeve to wipe the wetness from your cheeks.Â
âI know you love him too. You deserve to know. Donât let him be a stubborn jackass to you, okay? Iâm beinâ serious. I should be the one thankinâ you though, honey. In all the years Iâve known him, I never thought Iâd see âem this happy. I promise I wonât get this drunk at your wedding.â Steve winked, straining to push himself up out of the swing, somehow managing to catch his balance as he stumbled into the grass.Â
âYou do make a very inspirational drunk, Steve.â You laughed to yourself, looking up at him with a genuine smile. âThank you.âÂ
âYouâre welcome. Alright, enough sap, Iâm gonna go get another fuckinâ beer, Iâll see ya around okay?âÂ
âOkay, maybe a water would be good for you, too.âÂ
âWaterâs for pussies.âÂ
âWaterâs good for people who donât want raging hangovers tomorrow.âÂ
âPirates are always drunk, so Iâll be fuckinâ fine.âÂ
âWhatever you say, Steve.âÂ
It didnât take long for Javi to return, easily spotting his tall, broad body making his way through the crowd, beaming at you as he walked over to the swings. You tried your best to smile back at him with the uneasy pounding in your chest quickly building, feeling your heartbeat in your throat. âHey, Hermosa. Sorry it took so long, I ended up stopping to get another drink on the-âÂ
âDo- Javi, do you trust me?âÂ
Your words were quiet and blunt as they rolled off your tongue, your eyes peeled on your feet kicking through the grass beneath you.Â
Javiâs brow immediately scrunched in confusion, completely off put by your question and demeanor. âDo I- Baby, what are you talking about? Of course I trust you? Whatâs going on?â Setting down his drink, he began making his way next to you in frantic, worried strides.Â
âThen why wonât you talk to me about it?â Your eyes darted from the ground up to his, his sweet brown eyes swirling with confusion at the firm tone of your voice and desperation growing across your face.Â
âTalk to you about what? Hermosa, whatâs going on? Is everything ok-âÂ
âWhy wonât you talk to me about Colombia?âÂ
 Javi took a step back. He wasnât sure if it was out of defense, or absolute shock from the words that had just fallen out of your mouth. He stared at you for a moment, his jaw locking as you could see how hard he swallowed, trying to bide his time as he calculated his response.Â
âOsita⊠Itâs not that simple.âÂ
âThatâs not an answer.âÂ
âI donât understand why weâre talking about this. Baby, if this is because of last night, you donât need to worry about me, can we please just drop it?â The two of you faced each other in an unspoken standoff, Javiâs hands now resting on his hips as you crossed your arms over your chest. You had tried so hard to be patient, but in the moment, it was like all of your frustration was beginning to boil over.Â
âThatâs exactly why weâre talking about this, Javi. Because I fucking worry about you. All the time. Iâve tried so hard to be patient. Iâve never, ever tried to get you to talk about it because I know itâs fucking hard. But last night, youâre up at 2 A.M, wandering around the apartment, and Iâm begging you to tell me whatâs wrong and you wonât fucking do it. Iâm not an idiot, Javi. I canât live in this weird in between space in your life where you pretend your past doesnât exist when I know it still fucking haunts you. Why wonât you just talk to me about it?âÂ
Javi could feel his heart pounding in his chest, his palms sweating as they clenched in tight fists at his sides. He tried so desperately to find an answer, something, anything he could tell you to try and justify his choices. The choices he had kept from you. The choices he couldnât forgive himself for. âBecause, I- fuck- because, goddamnit, I just- I was a terrible fucking person, okay? The things I did, they were-âÂ
âWhat? Fucked up? Painful? Shitty? Of course they fucking were, Javi. You were literally in Colombia chasing down Pablo Fucking Escobar. What did you think I thought you were doing down there? Filing away paperwork? You donât think I know that you did things you regret? That youâve hurt people? Made choices that hurt innocent people who didnât deserve it? I know Javi, I fucking know. I watched my brothers come back from the same goddamn thing. I tried so hard to give them space, to let them come to terms with the fucked up things they did on their own, and you know what fucking happened? One of themâs fucking dead because of it. I canât let it happen again. I donât care about what you did. It doesnât make you a bad person. But you canât try and hide it from me and pretend like it doesnât exist. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you. But I canât if you donât trust me. Please trust me. Please. I love you so much, Javi. I canât lose you.âÂ
Javi stood in silence, as the both of you fought the tears streaming down your cheeks. He wasnât sure if he had just been hit in the gut with a giant sucker punch, or if the weight of the world had just been lifted off his shoulders. He truly didnât know how to feel. He wasnât even sure if he had heard you correctly. Did you really just tell him that you knew about the fucked up, terrible things he had done and that you didnât care? That you still fucking loved him? All you wanted was for him to trust that you wanted to be there for him? He could feel his hands trembling and lip quivering as he tried to find the words to speak.
 âOsita⊠I- fuck, baby. Osita, Iâm so sorry. I trust you with my fucking life. You- You donât deserve to have to deal with with all the fucked up things Iâve done. I donât wanna scare you away, baby. Youâre the best thing thatâs ever fucking happened to me and I was so terrified if you found out about the terrible person I used to be, youâd leave. Itâs not fair to you, I canât expect you to carry the weight of all the fucking things Iâve done, too. Iâm so sorry.â Quietly, Javi sat down next to you on the empty swing, burying his hands in his face. Gently, you reached over, pulling his hands away, forcing him to look at you.Â
âWhatever you tell me isnât gonna scare me away. I promise. The only thing thatâs gonna scare me is when you try to pretend youâre okay when youâre not. Javi⊠Javi, I just- I just wanna be there for you. I donât want you to have to do it alone. Iâd do anything for you. I trust you more than anyone. Youâre my best friend. I just- fuck- I just want you to trust that Iâll always be there for you to. I promise.âÂ
And just like that, the last brick holding up the wall between you and Javier Peña collapsed. There was nothing left to run from. Nothing left to hide. After he returned home, he was a changed man. He had hated the person he had become. Maybe there was a part of him that didnât want to be loved, because he didnât believe that he deserved to be. But then, there was you.Â
You.Â
You had taken everything he had known and changed his life for the better. You had become his better half, the person he loved more than anyone in the world. You had proved he was worthy of more than just existing- you had proved to Javi that he was worth the love and happiness you had promised him from the moment you had come into his life and made it worth living for.Â
âYou promise?âÂ
âI promise. Always.âÂ
The way Javi grabbed you and wrapped you in his arms, grasping at the back of your shirt as he pulled you in tighter, feeling the hot breath of his silent sobs against your shoulder told you everything you needed to know. You didnât know much, but if there was one thing you did know, it was that you loved Javier Peña more than life itself. As quickly as it had felt like your life had fallen apart, he had come into it and picked up the broken pieces to put it back together. And on an October night in San Antonio, sitting on an old wooden swing set in the Murphyâs backyard, you hoped that Javi knew that you would always be there to pick up the shattered parts of his past, too.Â
You werenât sure how many hours had passed as you sat hand in hand in the swings with Javi as you listened to anything and everything he had to say. Long after the backyard was empty, and the bonfire had faded to embers and ashes, and the only one left awake besides the two of you was Connie, trying to drag Steve back inside from the plastic lawn chair he had passed out on, you finally made your way up to bed for the best sleep the two of you had in a very, very long time. Your goodbyes to the Murphyâs had been short and sweet- Connie exhausted from the late night, and Steve barley coherent from how hungover he was, you were still both so thankful the two of you had made the journey out to see them, and the both of you, just as grateful for the sweet and supportive life long friends you knew the Murphyâs would become. Most of your drive back to Laredo was spent in a comfortable silence, the golden sunrise spilling through the windows of Javiâs truck as you cruised down the highway, Javiâs hand never leaving yours, your fingers intertwined together as his thumb gently rubbed against your soft skin and your head rested against his broad shoulder.Â
âHow are you feeling about seeing your mom today?â You asked, lightly squeezing his arm as you smiled up at him, now exiting off the freeway quickly approaching the cemetery where you planned to meet Chucho to celebrate DĂa De Los Muertos, trying your best to comfort Javi as he prepared to see his momâs gravesite for the first time since her funeral almost a decade ago. Javi let out a quiet sigh, his grip tightening just a little tighter around your hand as he looked over at you, a surprisingly calm look flooding his face.Â
âIâm actually doing okay. Better than I would have thought. I think I was always so worried that she wouldnât be proud of me and the man Iâd become after she was gone. I um- I finally think that sheâd be proud of me now.â He glanced over at you, his smile soft and tender as he soaked in the reason for his pride sitting right beside him.Â
You noticed Chuchoâs truck as you pulled up to park along the edge of the small cemetery, Chucho excitedly waving you down as you both hopped out of the car. Walking around to Javi, you were quick to grab his hand, giving him a reassuring grip as the two of you made your way through the gravestones along the thin cobblestone path towards Chucho, already arranging the items he had collected for Luciaâs ofrenda.Â
âHola, niños.â Chucho grinned, wrapping his arms around the both of you. âIâm so glad youâre here.âÂ
âThanks for letting me be a part of today, Chucho. I know⊠Well, I just- Iâm really honored to- just, thank you.â Chucho wasted no time pulling you into your own hug, his rough and worn hands holding you by the shoulders as he looked at you with misty eyes.Â
âMija, I should be thanking you. If it wasnât for you, I donât know if we would all be here today. Luciaâs last wish to me was that I would promise to make sure Javier was happy. Now hija, I think my sweet Lucia can rest a little easier knowing someone else has already fulfilled my promise for me.â As the two of you spoke, you hadnât noticed as Javi had quietly stepped over to his motherâs gravestone, crouching next to it, his fingers delicately tracing along the engraved letters of her name, his other hand holding one of the marigold flowers Chucho had brought with him. The two of you watched quietly as Javi sat next to his mom, gently placing the flower on the shiny stone as he spoke.Â
âHola, mamĂĄ. Te extrañé. Siento haber tarado tanto.â (Hi mom. I missed you. Iâm sorry I took so long). Javiâs voice trembled as he took a deep breath in, slowly exhaling as his hand rested on the stone, warm from the sun, shining brightly in the blue November sky. âQue estaba asustada de de verte porque estaba orgullosala de la persona en la que me habĂa convertido. Que no querĂa decepcionarte. TenĂa miedo mucho, mamĂĄ. Me sentĂ como si todo se derrumbase. solo querĂa olvidar. Pero entoncesâŠâ (I was scared to see you because I wasnât proud of the person Iâd become. I didnât want to disappoint you. I was so scared, mom. I felt like I let everyone down. I just wanted to forget. But thenâŠ). Javi turned his head, seeing you and Chucho, arm in arm, a smile growing across his face as looked back at the two people in life he loved the most. He took an extra moment to stare at you and the soft grin spread between your cheeks, basking in the comfort and warmth of the woman who had forever changed his life for the better. âPero entonces, mamĂĄ, La conocĂ. Que es perfecta. Nunca supe que podĂas amar tanto a alguien. Ella es lo mejor que me ha pasado. La habrĂas amado.ella es una maestra, tambien. A veces me pregunto quĂ© ve en mĂ. No sĂ© quĂ© hice para merecerse. voy a pedirle que se case conmigo.CuidarĂ© bien de ella. Ella se merece todo lo que le pueda dar y mĂĄs. Espero que estĂ©s orgulloso de mĂ, mamĂĄ. te echo mucho, Pero le juro a usted, al fin soy feliz. Te amo, mamĂĄ.â (But then, mom, I met her. She is perfect. I never knew you could love someone so much. She is the best thing thatâs ever happened to me. You would have loved her. Sheâs a teacher too. Sometimes, I wonder what she sees in me. I donât know what I did to deserve her. Iâm gonna ask her to marry me. Iâm gonna take such good care of her. She deserves everything I can give her and more. I hope youâre proud of me, mamĂĄ. I miss you so much, but I promise you, Iâm finally happy. I love you, mom.)Â
With a gentle nudge from Chucho, you softly stepped behind Javi, gently placing your hands on his shoulders before he rose up and you wrapped your arms around his waist, resting your head against his chest as he wiped away the tears welling behind his eyes. Staring down at Luciaâs gravestone, Javi ran his hand through your hair, carefully planting a kiss against your head and burying his nose in the soft waves of your hair.Â
âI wish I would have had the chance to have met you, Mrs. Peña. I would have had someone else to commensurate with over all of the crazy teaching stories Iâm sure the both of us have. Maria, Estelle and Linda all miss you a lot too, but Iâm sure they havenât changed a bit. Thanks for raising such a good son. I donât know what I would do without him. I know he says that he doesnât know what he did to deserve me, but I really think it should be the other way around. I promise Iâll look out for him.â You tried your best to smile through your soft sobs, looking up at Javi, tears streaming down his wet cheeks. It wasnât long before Chucho had snuck up behind you, patting each of you on the back before smiling down at Lucia, too.Â
âEstos dos estĂĄn tan enamorados, Lucia. Tal vez mĂĄs que tĂș y yo. Ella es una buena chica. Estoy muy contenta de que ella sea parte de nuestra familia. Finalmente tendremos a nuestros nietos, tambiĂ©n.â (These two are so in love, Lucia. Maybe even more than you and I. She is a great girl. I am so happy she is a part of our family. We are finally going to get our grandchildren, too). Chucho winked, nudging Javi in the side, forcing him to laugh through his tears, shaking his head at his dadâs comment. âNow, no more tears, you two. This is a happy day. Your mamĂĄ is smiling down on you, and I can almost hear here scolding me to keep you from crying anymore. Câmon, letâs decorate and eat, I even brought pozole.âÂ
The three of you spent the next hour decorating Luciaâs grave with bright orange and gold cempazuchitl (marigold flowers) and little Calaveras (sugar skulls) painted in bold colors and refined details, sharing and laughing about Javiâs favorite memories of his mother while snacking on the Pozole Chucho had brought to share. For the first time in a long time, Javi no longer felt guilt and grief when he thought about his mom- her memory filled him with love and joy. He wasnât the same bitter, broken man he was when he had said his final goodbyes to his mother all those years ago. While he wished he could change the past, the reality of the present, and his future finally brought him peace, knowing he could be proud of the man he had become, thanks to you.Â
As Javi helped Chucho to clean up the extra flowers and decorations he had brought, you couldnât help yourself from reaching at the wrinkled photo you had shoved in your pocket as you had packed up to leave from the Murphyâs this morning. You carefully took it out, holding it gently in your hands as you tried to uncrinkle the edges. âYou ready, Hermosa?â Javi called out, now a few steps ahead of you, making his way back towards the truck. âHermosa?â He asked again, thinking perhaps you hadnât heard him the first time. When he was greeted by silence again, he looked back to see you staring at the crumpled photo in your hands.Â
âI um- I know that he isnât buried here, and uh, if you donât want me to, itâs okay- but um- is it, is it alright if I leave a couple flowers for Patrick?â You sniffed, a tear dropping down on the photo of the two of you, Patrick holding you in a headlock as you laughed with a wide, toothy grin, drowning in one of his old Blackhawks jerseys that you were so excited to wear because it belonged to him.Â
âOf course, Osita. Of course it is.â Javi smiled at you softly, turning back around with the tub of leftover decorations, making his way towards you. Quietly, you walked back over to Luciaâs gravestone, carefully setting down the picture of you and Patrick next to it, putting a few marigolds over top of it so it stayed pinned in place from the warm breeze.Â
âI miss you, asshole. You deserved so much better. I hope you donât still think that I hate you. I mean, I do, but you know what I mean. Honestly, you were lucky you didnât have to live through the Blackhawks losing in the playoffs this year, that fucking sucked. Mom and Dad and Charlie and David all miss you too. I finally went back home to see them. It still wasnât the same without you there, but I know you donât hurt anymore. I hope that you donât hurt anymore. I love you, Patrick. Crack open a cold one up there for me, okay?â Trying your best to not to uncontrollably sob, you sniffled, wiping the tears running down your face as you leaned your head against Javiâs chest. He ran his hand along your back as he held you tighter, letting you take a moment to get everything out before you took a deep breath, nodding your head as if to signify to Javi and yourself that you were okay.Â
âYou okay, Osita? We can take all the time you need, baby.â Javi whispered, pressing a gentle kiss into your shoulder.Â
âNo, Iâm okay. I just- I wanted to do something for him, too. Thanks, Javi. I love you.âÂ
âI know.âÂ
After several more long hugs goodbye with Chucho, you and Javi began your journey back home, marveling at the beautiful sunset, painting the sky with bright pinks and oranges and the warmth and comfort of Lucia and Patrickâs presence. You were so lost in thought staring out at the fading sky, you hadnât even noticed that Javi had detoured from your usual route home until he had said something to you. âYou okay if we make a quick pit stop on the way home, Osita?â You nodded, smiling at the golden glow covering his face. It wasnât long until you were veering off the main road, Javi turning to make his way down a tree lined gravel pathway with a âFor Saleâ sign posted in front of it.Â
âFor sale?â You questioned, looking over at Javi before peering out your window to watch the trees lining the path pass by you as the gravel crunched under the truckâs tires.
âYeah, uh- I was talking with Steve at the party yesterday and he- uh, one of his buddies said he was looking to get out of the city- wanted a plot of land to build on. Said he had heard good things about Laredo but didnât have time to go check things out for himself, so I told him I would go take a look around and let Steve know what I thought.â Javi replied, trying his best to sound nonchalant as you shrugged before looking back out the window. As you reached the end of the path, the trees opened to reveal a beautiful, lush green field, the sun setting perfectly along the rolling hills of the horizon in front of you. Turning off the ignition, Javi gestured for the both of you to get out of the truck so you could go take a look around.Â
âJav⊠This is beautiful.â You marveld, grinning as you took in the beauty of the open space drenched in golden sunset.Â
âYou like it?â Javi grinned, laughing as you spun around, the gentle breeze blowing your hair in and out of your face.Â
âOh my God, yeah. Tell Steveâs friend to get on this place ASAP before I scrounge up every penny I have and sell one of my kidneys on the black market to buy it from him. There doesnât even need to be a house, Iâll just lay in the empty field, perfectly content.â You giggled, letting out a happy sigh as you grabbed Javiâs hand, leaning your head against his arm as you admired the sun slipping away below the horizon.Â
âIâll take that as a yes then. He said heâs wanting to build a house here, do you think- do you think that he would think itâs got enough space? Itâs not too far from everything? I know itâs a little farther from downtown and a longer drive to work- if uh, if he works by where we do, you donât think thatâd be a problem? For him?â Javi squeezed back, trying his best not to stumble over his words.Â
âAre you kidding me? Itâs literally perfect out here, Javi. Could you imagine getting to see this every night? He better put some big windows on this house so he can get all of the sunlight, oh my god, it would be so pretty. Itâs not even that far from everything, and the view makes the extra drive time worth every minute. I know itâs probably a far way off, and we havenât really talked about it, but I would love to live at a place like this someday.âÂ
Javi smiled to himself, looking down at you as you rested against him, soaking in every ounce of you as he shifted his arm to wrap around your waist, gently rubbing his thumb along the soft hem of your shirt before letting out a content sigh.Â
âYeah. Me too.â
Taglist: @cool-iguana @rhoorl @whyjuliaaa @bbiophiliaa @pertinentpostmortem @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24 @3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85 @partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed @pedrohoe04 @theorganasolo @endlessthxxghts @blackfemalenerd
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OMFG!!! i just read that chan smut and omg. THE DUALITY!! i literally love all the smuts that you write. also my birthday is february 6th so, if you donât mind, could you write me a smut with my bias/biases. as you know i have a daddy kink. my biases are chan, seungcheol, and hoshi. you donât have to. love you and thank you for the dino smut i absolutely loved it!-đ§
Pairing: Fem!reader x seungcheol x chan x soonyoung
Genre:Â smutty smut smut
Word count:Â 4.7K
Tags: poly, reader wearing a dress, exhibitionism, voyeurism, pet names (princess), degradation, praise kink, brief choking, fingering, oral (rec. And giving), unprotected sex (please assume everyone is clean, don't do this w/o prepping IRL), pussy slapping, ass play, triple penetration (i know), daddy kink, mean chan, sweet Cheol
Summary: it was just a dumb little party game, gets taken too seriously in teh best way possible. Happy fucking birthday to you.
Author note: first off, happy birthday! Youâre always active here and sending me ideas and I appreciate you so much. Second off the fact that your list is my exact top three made this very self-indulging. I thank you for that. Please enjoy me writing out of of my darkest fantasies đ
âFuck. Marry. Kill. Seungcheol, Chan, Soonyoung. Go.â
You scorn up at Mingyu, âDidn't know we were still in middle school?â
You were celebrating your birthday with a couple of close friends having some drinks and good quality takeout at your place. Somewhat small for others but what you preferred it. Having all the attention on you in a public place was not your scene. These small intimate gatherings were more your speed. Then again, it prompted dumb shit like this.
Mingyu was not many shots in, but he looked like a toddler that learned to walk for the first time, so it was fair to say he drunk out of his mind. âDonât cop out, answer the-hic-damn question.â
Your gaze shifted from the three men, all equally waiting for a response. You take a moment to linger in each thought of each man, internally listing out any and all of their redeeming qualities.Â
Seungcheol, who pretended to not care about your answer, peeks at you through his peripheral. He was the impossibly attractive guy next door, figuratively and literally. It was easy to tell he does everything with purpose and excluded this natural confidence and charisma. Not to mention he was a guy you could rely on like most people already do.
Then we have Soonyoung, the man full of life. If you could describe him in one word, itâd be âcrazyâ. This was the same guy that commits to being a tiger but calling it his âbrand, and letâs not forget his astrology chart, which youâre not gonna get into. Heâs fucking hot, donât get it wrong, but also the strangest man youâve ever met on planet Earth.Â
Now finally Chan, the cute man sitting next to you, eyes coated in nectar-like sweetness with a soft smile on his face. Heâs always has been a sweet guy since you met him. Heâs amicable and seemingly harmless, which made people feel comfortable around him. You canât go wrong with Chan.
You visibly ponder, licking your lips, before answering.
âFuckâŠSoonyoung, marryâŠSeungcheol, and I guess kill Chan? But I canât kill him,â you look to the man mentioned and interlock arms, âso, Iâll just have to kiss him.â
You press your lips against his cheek, laughing emitting from onlookers. A warm blush spreads across his cheeks and he looks down at his feet. His smile turns bittersweet. âGreat. Nice.â
âYouâll always be my favorite buddy, Chan. I could never kill you,â you coo, a finger lightly stroking at his red cheeks before he lightly shoves you away, rolling his eyes, and grabs another beer.
You initially donât think much of it, it was only a dumb ice breaker after all. However, that event had his friends teasing him the rest of the night (but whatâs new) and Chan was being the joke of the night, while Seungcheol was poking fun at you instead. Every chance he got, heâs saying things like heâs âwaiting on that proposal,â or âshould I get started on the wedding planning?â And Soonyoung seems to be a step behind the older gentleman, playfully suggesting what things he does make him âfuckable.â He could be only cutting up limes for shots, or posing on the back of a wall asking, âthis do anything for you?â Attention was on you mainly, as expected, but that didnât warrant the number of times you had gotten flustered.
Nonetheless, everything that night seemed all in good fun, a birthday worth having. At some point in the night, Soonyoung passed out on the couch, while everyone else was preparing to leave. Seungcheol offers to help clean up, it was very neighborly of him, which you always welcome. Chan, in the midst of all this, was nowhere to be found and it caused you to worry, calling his phone with no answer. You werenât apart from him long typically in these social situations.
âThanks for helping out, Cheol.â
âAnything for my betrothed,â he teases.
âShut up,â you lightly elbow, âItâs late, Iâm gonna wash up to sleep. Just make sure to lock the door when you leave, okay.â
He nods off your request and lets you venture off to your room. He pays it no mind, finishing off some dishes, unable to hear anything underneath the sound of the sinkâs running water.
On the other end of your closed bedroom door, you make a startled expression once you realize what, or should you say who was behind it. âChan? I was wondering where you were.â
He softly scoffs from the mattress, slouching in his spot, looking as if he waited for your return. âReally? Didnât seem to think you had a second thought about me.â
âOf course I did.â You walk up towards him and pull him up from the mattress by the arm, smiling at him. âI canât help but think about you all the time.â
âBut youâd kill me, hmm?â He tears his wrist away from your touch, drawing his face closer to yours, âThatâs not what you said last week up against my bedroom window.â
You purse your lips in amusement, remembering that day all too clearly. It was moving day for him and out of all people, he called you. He mentioned needing a few boxes brought in and everyone else seemed busy, little did you know, he had other plans that night with you. Those plans are how many times he can get you to cum within an hour, or how pretty you look pressed up against a clean glass window.Â
âBut they donât know that.â You retort.
âYou embarrassed me out there, you know,â His eyes narrow at you, ignoring your attempts of pandering as you flirtatiously tease up his arm, âThe friend-zoning, the familial kiss, the rejection, and in front of all our friends. I didnât like it.â
You softly laugh, fingering through his pretty brown hair, âIâm sorry, but it'd be obvious if I said one of the other two. Could you find in your heart to forgive me?â
He turns away his eyes, feigning thought. âWell, since itâs your birthday, I couldâŠdoesn't mean I will.â
He tugs on you similarly the way you did to kiss him, only this time his lips locked on lips, and his skin was noticeably flushed from alcohol and lust. Your eyes naturally flutter shut, arms instinctively reach up for his face, cupping his warm cheeks. You melt in his touch, brazen and ruthless, your arousal basically dripping a hot stain in your underwear as his teeth pull at your bottom lip deliciously.
He strokes your sides, hands drawing the curve of your posterior and clutching in a hearty squeeze, a whimper leaving your lips. You feel the corner of his lips quirk up, eyes pressing into you with a smug expression. âAre you like this with all your âbuddiesâ?â
You shake your head with a cheeky smile on your face, âNo.â
He hums amused, lips drawing close to your ear, his decadent voice pricking your ear. âI want you to fall apart for me. Can you do that, hmm? Can you do that for Daddy?â
Your abdomen tenses up, a sultry moan escaping you, âYes, daddy.â
âSuch a good girl,â He draws out.
He pulls the zipper down from your dress, pulling off the straps from your shoulders, chuckling against your skin, as your outfit hits the floor. You giggle as he hoists you up, your legs locking around his waist, meeting his lips again more feverishly than the last. He runs you on top of your dresser, parting your legs to stand between them.
âYour turn,â You reach for the hem of his hoodie, pulling it over his head and tossing it to the side of the room, âThatâs better. Happy birthday to meâŠâ
Hand trailing over Chanâs chest, down his torso, tracing over every dent of his abs, making you lightheaded and giddy. You pull on the top of his jeans, meeting him in a kiss, they become the next article of clothing to come off, following his boxer briefs and grasp his length. His nose nuzzles your cheek, hot breath on your skin, and his digits press up against the fabric of your panties to dip in the wet spot and plunge into your clothed arousal. You pleasantly gasp, hips jerking in his direction, one hand combing through his hair.
âOh, daddyâŠâ
His smile grows wide. âYouâre so wet already, sweet girl.â
He allows himself a taste, humming at the familiar flavor, and pushes past your underwear to gradually thrust them inside, watching uneven breaths escape your lips. He revels in your whimpers, pushing them deeper inside you. The airiness of your voice was additive, but what was more addictive in the look on your face when he sees you close. âThat feels good, huh? You like my fingers fucking you like this?â
You were practically vibrating in your seat, and your back arches in distress, gripping the edge of the dresser, âGod, yesâŠYouâre so good to me, daddy.â
It was a matter of time before his cock would replace his fingers, swiping your taste on your tongue for you to sample. Moaning, your lips wrap around their slender length, your arousal coating the surface of your tongue and inside your mouth. You hold him by the wrist, his knuckles swallow inside you before his very eyes, sucking your neck dry from his hands as he fucks his fingers into your burning hot entrance.
You whimper into his palm before he decides to pull it away and wrap it around your throat, meanwhile, his cock finds entry in your warmth, your fluttering walls welcoming him. Your hips falling slightly below the dresser's flat surface, you gasp for air. Your vision blurs as much as your abdomen clenches, submitting to Chanâs rough touch. He leverages you by holding you up the back of your knee while your other leg hung over his shoulder, snapping his hips back into you with such ferocity, a throaty moan falling short of every thrust. He sounded scrumptious, like fresh honey oozing out of its comb, you wanted to lick every part of him.
âWhat do we have here?âÂ
Your helping hand for the party has finally found your helping hand in bed (or this case the dresser), rutting in you like two rabbits in mating season. Chan doesnât stop his pace, only a smile growing wider on his face. âI guess the jig is up.â
âYouâre just gonna keep fucking her while Iâm here, kid?â
Chan only grows cockier when you show no sign of change, still moaning his name, âWhy shouldnât I, she sure likes it. Donât you, filthy birthday girl?â
You nod, âY-yes, daddy.â
Seungcheol looks impressed, crossing his arms together, he canât help but enjoy the view. The times he imagined you looking a mess in front of him went on but no image in his head could do justice to the real thing, even if it was Chanâs dick inside you. Your sweat made your beautiful body glisten under the lamp lights, your pretty little pants endearing as they steadily leave your lips, and your messy hair so damn pullable that made his dick twitch.
âNeed some help?â He offers nonchalantly.
Chan looks back at the older man for the first time, almost barking back a no, but instead takes a moment to consider and turns to you. His eyes flit back to you, holding you by your face, hips unbearably enthusiastic. âWhat do you say, huh, you want two cocks in you? Hmm, is that what you want?â
You choke up on your drool, tears already running down your faces as you respond in a hard nod, then proceed to be thrown back on the mattress to have Seungcheol witness your lewd form in its entirety. His hands go to the tent in his pants, palming himself anxiously. He knew you were beautiful beyond words, but there was no other beauty than the way you were almost naked. Your arms come up to your chest, shielding your stiff peaks but at the same time emphasizing the roundness of your breasts.
âW-what?â You ponder up at him, your pretty eyes looking back in a way that made Seungcheol want to scream. âIâm a mess, a-arenât I?â
âA very pretty mess,â Seungcheol reiterates.
âOf course she is.â Chan sits beside you on the bed, pushing hair away from your face and pressing his lips to your ear, âHow about you get his dick wet first, birthday girl?â
âOkay,â you answer back eagerly, trudging forward and pulling Seungcheol by his belt and carefully removing it from him.
Seungcheol gives a look of astonishment, a quick glance thrown to see pride written all over the younger manâs face before turning back to you, already pulling down his pants and exposing his cock slapping on your face.
âWow.â You gasp, wrapping your hand around his girth, feeling his weight.
âThink you can take it, princess?â
Your heart pitter-patters at the name Seungcheol gives you and you let out a hearty âyes.â Chan stays behind you, hands cupping your breasts, fondling your flesh, he becomes a little devil in your ear. âWhat are you waiting for then?â
You inch closer to Seungcheol, his angry tip on the center of your tongue. You drag your pink muscle over his shaft, tracing over every bulging vein, hearing him suck in his breath. Your other hand cradles his balls, kneading them lightly in your palm. When you push your head over his length, your mouth coats its surface area, feeling like a new, yet familiar world to him.
âS-shit.â His hips twitch forward, hands against his hips.
You bob down to the base, filling your cheeks and stretching your lips. He feels your saliva dribbling down his thigh, seeing the same scene happen over your chin, while your throat takes him with a gutty grit, taking all of him. When you gag slightly, having him almost pulls away in concern, but Chan takes initiative and combs through your hair, slamming you down on Seungcheolâs crotch, a shit-eating grin on his face. The older man almost doubles over, hand firmly planted on your shoulder in anguish.
âMmhâŠgodâŠthatââ
âLook at you taking his dick like a perfect little slut,â Chan exclaims before mouthing over your neck, love bites adorning your soft skin, âyou canât wait to be fucking filled with cock, canât you?â
You lacked the ability to be verbal, only vibrating a confirmation around Seungcheolâs cock, the man shuddering in the process. âPrincessâŠâ
Chan's hands snake around to your clit, rubbing it with his digits, his firm chest pressing into your sweaty back, the shaking in your body evident. âTake it deeper, slut.â
Tears burn your eyes, hands lifting to press behind Seungcheol, warming his cock in your mouth until you canât breathe. The said man lets out his share of obscenities, his hands on either side of your head, fucking your mouth at a desperate manâs pace until he feels it swells well past its limit, âFuck. Fuck!â
He cums hard, long, and deep. The trail of ivory slides down your throat with no warning, Seungcheol fills you to the brim, even overflowing to the corner of your lips. âSoâŠgoodâŠâ
âShit, you lasted a lot shorter than I expected, old man.â Chan smugly grins.
The older man tries catching his breath, but not without letting the other man hear it. âShut upâŠChan.â
âHow long have I been asleep?â
The voice resonates from the doorway, a barely awake Soonyoung blinks at the scene in front of him in confusion, adjusting to the change of lighting from the pitch-black living room. âHuh, what are you eating, y/n? A hoagie?â
âOh, god.â Chan groans, bowing his head.Â
Seungcheol couldnât pull out of you soon enough, the remainder of his cum swallowed up by you in the process. You picked up the courage to be the first one to ask, âHow long have you been standing there, Soonie?âÂ
âNot sureâŠwait. Are you guys having sex?â
Seungcheol pinches the bridge of his nose, visibly cringing. âYes, Soonyoung.â
âDo you want to join,â you suggest, exchanging looks with both men already involved.
Their eyes initially express reluctance but eventually, they nod in agreement. Chan whispers an âalright,â in your ear before kissing the side of your face. Seungcheol being still very fresh to their current situation had no complaints, nor was he in the place to. They all redirect back to the intruder, and you ask him again. âDo you want to join us, Soonyoung?â
A pink tinge on his cheeks as your naked body slips from the bed gracefully, sliding down your underwear to the ground. âJoin? Can I do that?â
His eyes locked on your prowess, your soft laughter sending off butterflies in his stomach as your hands crawls up to his face, stroking it endeared, âYes, you can. Will you?â
âP-pleaseâŠâ
You guide him by the hand and bring him over to the bed, joining the rest. You slip the worn-out muscle tee over his head to toss it aside. Once you meet his lips, your hands run through his slept-in hair and melt against you like a dream. You were like taffy, sweet yet salty, no doubt from what he witnessed earlier, but he didnât care. Forgetting the others around him, he pulls you in his lap, your wet cunt rubbing into his denim jeans as his hands take care of your body, collecting its warmth.
Seungcheol simply watches, running his hand down his body and stroking himself, feeling the tension build back up in cock. Chan joins him from across the bed. Licking his lips, he locks on the way your hips grind against Soonyoungâs, blood rushing towards his cheeks, wondering whether he was turned on imagining it was him or that it was genuinely fun watching.
Your bare skin meshes against Soonyoung, inhaling the stretch of alcohol and his expensive cologne etched into his skin, âMmhâŠSoonieâŠâ
âShit,â the man moans, holding your bare ass in his hands, âI really wanted to do this. You have no idea.â
âYou came at a good time too, Soonyoung. We were just about to fuck her together,â Chan doesnât forget to mention, âShe was ready to be filled up with two cocks, whatâs one more?â
Soonyoung grins against your lips. âThree cocks in our pretty baby huhâŠIâm certainly glad I woke up.â
The men strip down to their birthday suits. Chan, taking less time than the others, utilizes this opportunity to retrieve the lube you kept in the drawer of your bedside table. Seungcheol kisses you for the first time that night, sensually stroking your back and parting your hair, while Soonyoung lips attach to your breasts, feeling your nipples grow hard on his tongue as he cradles them. It really hits you whatâs happening when Chan squirts the cold lube on the center of your folds, rubbing it between his fingers, up in your warmth, before sliding down to prep your other entrance.Â
His middle finger carefully tests the entryway, teasing the outer edge, before the lube lets him slide in and adjusts to your grip. Your moans were hard to suppress when he playfully slid them in and out and shot them deeper inside when you ask for more, to which he canât help but laugh. âCute little slut, taking it up your ass so well for us.â
He tucks in another digit, curling it inside you, ramming it, and preparing you for every opportunity.
You flex your fingers and toes, âPlease Chan, Iâm r-ready.â
âAre you sure?â He teases.
âYes, pleaseâŠâ
Chan obliges, letting you go with a gentle thumb to the opening. They all position themselves, having discussed it moments ahead of time. Soonyoung has his back on the bed with your back hovering inches above his chest. He fingers the hole Chan had gotten ready and made sure it was adjusted to his liking, squeegeeing the excess lube. You twitch on top of him, finally feeling the tip of his cock circle at your entrance and slowly make its way inside you. Your jaw drops open, his member suffocates between your walls.
âChristâŠâ Soonyoung gasps, âYou feel heavenly, Y/n.â
He holds you up from the back of your knees, spreading you wide and pretty, and taking a slow, deep stroke inside you. You let out a low growl, throwing your head back, and reveling in Soonyoungâs gentle pace. âThatsâŠsoâŠgoodâŠâ
Chan takes care of himself with aid of the scene, spitting in his hand, and his cock grows to his touch. âYou look so fucking good stretched out.â
He approaches you, falling to his knees, and buries his face in your vacant warmth, still stroking himself. He licks stripes up your core, moistening his lips, as the tip of his nose brushes against your clit. Your stomach sucks in, ecstasy enflaming your core. âFuck, daddyâŠâ
Chan grows only harder and devours you faster, his tenor voices aches inside you, feeding his everlasting lust. Soonyoung takes his time with you still, hands now falling to your thighs, spreading you apart for Chanâs convenience, his hips gradually ramping up the speed.Â
Seungcheol is respectful in watching, only inching forward when you beckon him closer with moans on your tongue, mouth still wide and welcoming. He takes advantage of your invite, knees meeting the bed, reuniting his length with your mouth, and seeing you take him just as hard (if not harder) as before. Hands land in your hair, straining your neck but filling out of your throat, that glorious sensation coming back to Seungcheol almost immediately. âPretty mouthâŠPrincessâŠtake me good, hmm..â
âThatâs so hot, fuck, what the fuck?â Soonyoung was being overwhelmed in the best way possible, bouncing you harder in his lap, leaving the man with his mouth full smiling with less work to do.
Chan smacks your center fold with the tip of his fingers, feeling you flinch under his touch, and he does it again and again.Â
âDaddy hurtssâŠbutâŠfeels goodâŠâ You canât help you mumble with Seungcheolâs cock pressing to your lips.
âS-shit, youâre gonna make me cum in my hand,â Chan shutters, honest to his word, âbad girl, but I donât think I can wait anymore.â
He picks himself off the ground, his cock visibly furious. He rubs your slit with the tip, landing a lash to your clit, your sound of ache music to his ears, before he parts your folds and slides inside you, joining Soonyoung. He presses your legs back, Chan rocks in you in a steady rhythm opposite to Soonyoung. âMm, daddyâs cock with Soonieâs, l-love soâŠm-muchâŠâ
âSuch aâahâcockslut. T-that good, hmm? You like me fucking you with Soonyoung inside you, hmm?â
âY-yâMmh..â
âSay it, fucking tell me you love our cocks splitting you open.â
âI-I love your c-cocks split-t-ting me o-open.â
You clench your body in anxiously, taking both cocks the best you can, but your body can only hold back so much cum.
âLook, whoâs desperate to cum?â Chan observes, âWell, you can cum all you want, weâre not stopping.â
Chan is a man of his word. Even when your hips shake sporadically in front of them all, no one's pace falters. You were filled in all ends, an eternal loop of euphoria, the pleasant ache of your muscles easily manageable as long as you donât lose this sensation.Â
Seungcheol ruts your mouth with his eyes shut, only hearing the work your mouth puts in and pulls out when feels youâve had enough. Your slobber prints your cheeks, a tired look in your eyes, but a manic smile on your face. He wipes some saliva away with his thumb, pressing a sweet kiss to your lips. âIâll be sure to be slow at first, okay?â
Heart racing, you nod at his message, eyes drifting to see him place himself between you and Chan. Knees planted in the mattress beside either side of Soonyoung, he eases his length in your entrance on top of Chanâs, and unearthly sound follows coming from all around. Not a dry eye in the room, Seungcheol takes your calves and pressed them against his shoulders, squeezing with Chan in an uneven rhythm.Â
âFUCK!â He bites into your leg, muffling his groans, filling you deep, âtake me too, you can handle it. I believe in you.â
You scream in pleasure, your holes being fucked and filled, nodding your head forth and back. âFuck, yes, like that, pleaseâŠso fullâŠâ
The way it feels like everything at once, you can help but be overfilled with pride. You couldnât describe in words how it felt, only process the event enough to scream and moan.
âThatâs it, take us. Never have three cocks fuck your hole like this,â Chan points out through his sweaty pants.
Soonyoung simply groans deeply in your ear, snaking his hand over your clit, pinching the slick skin, your moans only growing louder and louder, and he then sticks his digits in your moisture, as if you were full enough. âYouâre so talented, Y/n. Shouldâve fucked you soonerâŠâ
The sounds echoing in the room were like a broken record, waves of euphoria played over and over. It didnât matter how long it took or how many positions were involved, you felt your heart rate taking ups and downs up they eventually grew tired.
âIâm gonna cum in you, that okay,â Seungcheol requests.
âY-yes, d-daddyâŠâ A blush deepens the surface of Seungcheolâs cheeks upon hearing that.
On the other hand, hearing his title being misused, Chan gets ticked off. He fuck harder with remorse, reminding you only one person can hold such a title, all while Seungcheol drops his load inside, coating you in snow white, grunting in you as his full length pushed the cum deep inside you until he finally pulls away. You open your mouth again, nonverbally asking to finish him off where he has before and he lets you, stroking what's left against your tongue.
Soonyoung follows soon after, his hips losing patience, âC-cum, in your ass, baby?âÂ
âYes, please, SoonyoungâŠâ You answer sweetly and he wastes no time, holding his cum deep in your ass after shooting hot cum in your backside until itâs dripping out of the edge.
âGood little cumslut, should I give you my gift too?â
Chan doesnât even let you answer, encouraged by your startled, shrieks. Finally, his cum spurts from his cock, mixing itself with Seungcheol remnants and pulling out to spray on your torso and fall against your flushed skin, showing you once again he never planned on giving you any mercy. You fall limp against the mattress, ivory honey trailing on your chest, stomach, cunt, and ass. The two of the older men lay beside you, fatigued as you were. Chan tears away from the scene at the moment to come back with wet towels. He tosses one to each of the men before coming to sit at the edge of your feet, wiping away the mess like he always does.
âShouldâve let you lick it up, but fuck it. Itâs your birthday,â Chan jesters with a soft grin.
âI wouldâve enjoyed it though,â you butt in.
He rolls his eyes, âYeah, but I like taking care of you.â
Soonyoung and Seungcheol grin upon hearing that, finding their younger friend endearing even after such an unfathomable event, both glancing to see you smile at his words. The intimacy piques both menâs curiosity, erupting all kinds of questions.
Seungcheol shifts his gaze from both you and Chan, smiling knowingly, âYou two do this a lot?âÂ
âAnd you've been hiding this from us for how long?â Soonyoung chimes in with a cheeky grin, ready to tease you both.
âHow did this even happen?â
âChanâs meaner than I thought, Y/n, did you know that? Is that what you like about him?â
âChan? Chan? When I lived next door?â
âSeriously, how long was I asleep?â
âIâve never cummed so much in my life. How the fucked did you do that?â
âCan you guys call me about the next orgy?â
The opposing duo laughs, finding the situation amusing already. Chan squeezes himself between you and Seungcheol, nuzzling his face in your neck as he cuddles you, âWell, âbuddyâ are you gonna answer their questions?â
You roll your eyes and clear your throat, taking your time in answering, still breathless, âIâm definitely calling you both over again.â
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one last messageÂ
word count:Â 2.2k
a/n: love on tour has come to an end đ it seemed only fitting to say goodbye to it with a small blurb from the love on tour series , the story of harry styles and y/n belmonte. thank you for all the love you always give me and i hope this blurb is enough to put a smile on your face. i love you, friends đ
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You adjusted the camera as you had it leaning against the bathroom mirror. You had finished your skincare and knew tomorrow was a big night for Harry and the entire Love on tour crew. There was a lot up in the air for your career and what was next, but in the next twelve hours, all you could think about was your boyfriend. He would be saying goodbye to a tour he poured his heart into, but most importantly, he was stepping away from what he loved to take a well deserved break. Harry couldnât stay away long; heâd be back. They all knew it was only a matter of when.
Harry was in bed; he had fallen asleep as you played with his hair and told him about your day. The pasta you made from scratch at the cooking lesson you found in a small neighborhood. It wasnât advertised, but the chef took a liking to you when you asked him more about his favorite dishes. It seemed that was enough to grant you a special spot in Mr. Carusoâs kitchen. He tried to play off his nerves, but you knew him well enough that this final show would be one he wanted to remember forever.
Once you knew your phone wouldnât fall, you pulled up Instagram and started a live. Itâs been a while since you did one. Usually, you do an origami piece with your fans to catch up with them. Tonight would be a little different. You hadnât been on for a minute, and the number was increasing by the second.
Twenty.
Five hundred.
Three thousand in under two minutes.
âHi, everyone,â you greeted cheerfully. âSorry, I havenât done one of these in a while. Life has been busy.â
The comments began to flood with âhellosâ and âI love you,â but also a lot of mentions of Barbie, the film you finished promoting and starred in. You moved past those comments and instead focused on one asking where you were.
âIâm in my bathroom. I finished my skincare for the night and thought we could chat briefly.â You giggled as you saw Lloyd joining in. The number was past 35k, and although you thought it was ridiculous at this hour in Italy, the rest of the world was running at different times. âLloyd!!! Buddy!!! Go to sleep!â You tease.
You first.
Shaking your head, you try to see if he comments again, but the comments are coming in at lightning speed.
Cariñoooooooo
âSarai, cĂłmo va tu dĂa?â How is your day? You ask your best friend.
Boring. Send me a flight to Italy.
You frown at the screen. âBe quiet. I asked if you wanted to come. You said you were busy.â
A cousinâs wedding. Remember.
âRight. Youâre officiating for them. Iâll see you in a few weeks,â you assure them knowing Naomi and Sarai will be staying with you for a weekâtwo if you manage to convince them.
Whereâs Harry?
Are you in Italy?
One last show!!!!
I loveeeee you!!!!!!
Final outfit reveal
Show harry
I love the new movie
A simple night. Though lots of questions if you would be in Italy for the final show as no one has seen you for a few weeks and where Harry was. You decided to do the live to connect with the fans, but you also wanted to go to bed and join Harry because even a room away, you missed him. You wanted to talk with the fans to share you feel the same sadness that tour is ending because Love on Tour gave you Harry, and thatâs something youâd never forget. The same feeling they all feel staring at Harry while being in the crowd is one that you feel too. You canât describe it, but you all know it well.
You think back to that night in St. Paul when you locked eyes with Harry and knew life would never be the same again. You can honestly say you didnât expect to fall in love with him and go on this crazy journey two years later, but there is nothing youâd change in your life because it led you straight to him.
âIt might seem odd, Iâm here talking with you late into the night.â You laugh at people calling out your time zone. âWell, itâs late for me. Maybe even weirder to do it without my overalls and stack of origami paper,â you take a deep breath before continuing. âI know a lot of you know about my relationship. How private we keep it because not everything is meant to be shared online. I like things to be mine, but Harry has never been mine alone. A piece of his heart belongs to each of you, and itâs not something I will ever forget. I am fortunate to love him and be loved by him. I donât ever take it for granted.â You sniffle and turn away from the camera to compose yourself, but you know it wonât work. When you look back, the comments are filled with love, and it keeps you going. âLove on tour allowed Harry and I to reconnect and truthfully fall in love. I wonât say more because itâs something special to us, but Love on Tour ending is bittersweet. Itâs a tour full of love where many of you met friends, best friends, and lovers. You know what it means to love someone because of an event and because of the distance. The love will only grow stronger, and that I can promise.â
You grin at Pauliâs comment saying how much they love you. You found the love of your life, but you also met new friends and built a bigger family.
âWhether youâre a fan of mine or only following me to get an update on Harry, I want to thank you for your kindness, not to me but towards him. If there is anyone who deserves all the love in the world, it is him. Most of you wonder why Iâm saying this here and not to Harry, but he knows. I can promise you he does. Think he might be fed up with all the love and support I shower him with, but Iâm doing it because I want to look back at this, who knows, maybe five, ten, twenty years from now, and be glad I shared this with you all. If anything, itâs something Harry can look back at when we have to be apart for longer than a day. Harry, sĂ© que no estĂĄs viendo esto, pero eres el amor de mi vida. Un Ășltimo baile mañana y estaremos de camino a casa. Que sigas cumpliendo todos tus sueños, mi estrella.â
You thank everyone for watching and signing off, turning off your phone, knowing the buzzing will start immediately. You know it will be shared all over the internet, and articles will be written by the time you wake up in a few hours. Usually, itâs something youâre careful about, but tonight you donât mind. Youâre proud of Harry, and youâre allowed to show it whenever you wish. You turn your phone off, knowing Harry loves his morning ringtone better than yours.
Turning the lights off, you know as soon as youâre wrapped in Harryâs arms, you're headed straight to dreamland. Crawling into bed is easy; moving the covers away from Harry proves to be a struggle every night. You shush him quietly to not wake him, and it seems to work until he shuffles over and drags you to lay flat on your back while he gets comfortable on your chest. He would forever be your little spoon.
âI love you, baby,â he mutters into the quiet of the night.
It makes your heart race even after two years together. You kiss the top of his head and repeat your favorite three words to him.
+
The final show has been nothing short of magical. Harry would spend the entire night on stage if he could, but you all know the show is close to ending. Harry, from the morning, had been cheerful from waking you up with a morning orgasm that led to making love, and once he let you get clothes on a walk along the water. You know he had seen your little speech but made no move to bring it up. It wasnât necessary because you constantly told him how proud you were, and it was evident in how you proudly showed Harry off all day to a crew that already knew and loved him. You donât know if someone texted it to him or if he happened to see it on Instagram, but he walked all day with an extra pep in his step. It could have also been the sex. Not a hint of sadness could be detected, and it eased your worries because it meant he was ready for a well deserved break.
You spent the show with Anne and Gemma, dancing your heart out. You knew Glenne and Jeff would pull you in for a final mosh pit as Harry danced his heart out to âKiwi.â Harry had thanked the fans endlessly throughout the entire night. His speeches always bring tears to your eyes. He thanked the band and the crew. He thanked his family for the support they offered the past thirteen years. You didnât expect a speech dedicated to you, so it caught you off guard when he mentioned you. All your shared family and friends cheered so loud, making it easy for Harry to spot you and even easier for the cameraâs to find you and show you on the screens.
âI donât know if some of you saw, but my girlfriend gave a lovely speech last night on a live,â Harry smiles as the crowd cheers for you. âShe poured her heart out to you while I was sleeping.â He wags his finger playfully. âLike she doesnât know I love my ego to be fed. Her love is something I feel even when sheâs not around, but I am thankful sheâs here tonight. Sheâs here, and sheâs been dancing and singing all night. It's my favorite thing in the world seeing her happy.â Harry can see Glenne nudging her playfully, but your eyes never leave his. âI love being on stage and performing for you all. Itâs everything I dreamed of, and I canât wait to return soon to do it again.â Harry gives you a dimpled smile, and you know the look in his eye; even from a distance, you know he wishes he could kiss you. âNo one tells you how much you miss out on. Family celebrations, nieces' first steps, and even graduations. The biggest to the littlest things matter. Bel has reminded me that even when Iâm not there, I can send a reminder that Iâm thinking of my family and friends. That everyone understands Iâm doing what I love. I love being here with you all, but I also love being home.â Harry places a hand over his heart. âBel has made me a better son, friend, and partner. Now I know this is sappy, and maybe youâre over this, and sheâs going to tell me after this wasnât necessary, but I do want it to be known that Iâm happy. I have never been happier. And while I will be going away for some time, I want you to know Iâm in good hands until I return and am yours again.â
The cheers are a mix of sobs and relief, knowing he will be back even with no set date. You canât seem to stop crying. All the comforting Anne is doing is working, but itâs as if Harry broke you open by pouring his heart out for you on stage.
âHeâs a bit of a romantic, my little one,â Anne teases as she squeezes you tighter.
âYouâre telling me. Iâm no match.â
Anne laughs, âyou flew out the entire family and act like thatâs not the greatest gesture.â
Itâs true. You planned with Anne to make sure everyone could make it out by planning accommodations and rides for the final show to go smoothly for them. Harry deserved a large celebration, and it was important to have his family here. Naomi wanted to be here because if it werenât for your best friend, you wouldnât have found Harry in 2021 though Harry liked to think your paths would cross either way. Naomiâs parents, Ruby and Phil, made the journey for Harry. They happily welcomed him into the family. Viola flew in for the celebration as had Violet, your goddaughter with her father Alex.. Your family had become his, and they were here to celebrate two incredible years of a tour filled with love and joy. He deserved to have his family here after missing them so much. There was a wonderful celebration to come after the show ended.
âGuess we compliment each other well like that,â you told Anne. Small moments that reminded you how much a perfect fit you are for each other.
Harry clears his throat, ânow, Iâm sure Bel is flustered and wants me to stop, so I will. Thank you for being here. Thank you for changing my life. I love you.â He points at you, and you blow him a kiss he pretends to catch and puts it over his heart for safekeeping. Â âI love you, and Iâll miss you.â
You donât know what the future holds for your relationship. All you know is that your love will guide you through it all. Whether you get married, have kids, or simply exist to love each other, everything will work out the way it needs to because your love was written in the stars.
+
thank you for reading! love on tour has been so magical and special for us all. i love you all and hope you go back and read this series if youâre ever missing love on tour. te quiero mucho đ€
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eli iâm having dirty bookworm thoughts again⊠they can at least break me from my reading slump not only make me more addicted to sunghoon đ€š DOES SUNGHOON EVEN READ why am i coming up with these kind of ideas đ
iâm thinking đ youâre writing a romance novel with a few sex scenes sprinkled in there and when sunghoon finds out about them after you give him to read your first draft he gets jealous?? youâve spend so much time thinking about these things what if you were horny and you touched yourself after writing them out? and you didnât tell him a thing?? he decides to do every single intimate scene from your book to you tonight but TIMES better đ
sunghoon is really going to be your bias sweetie i think, you're constantly losing your mind over him (but don't ever stop, i love it). it's so funny to me how we're always associating him with books lmaoo but i'm here for it and i love to write it everytime.Â
SUNGHOON has always been very supportive of you and every project you started. so when you announced that you had been writing some novels and wanted to get serious with that, he couldn't have been more proud of you.Â
he was so attentive to your every need whenever you started another writing session. he brings you tea or coffee when you're thirsty and cooks for you when he knows you've spent the whole day working on your novels and didn't eat. but sunghoon was always there to take care of you and help you out of your writing blocks by giving you idea, or reading your texts to help you improve.Â
so when you told him that you wanted to start writing a romance novel, he was all in helping you even if he teased you a little bit by reminding you not to describe him too much as the perfect boyfriend. but apart from that, he doesn't try to interfere in the creative process too much, not asking about the plot if you don't mention it to him. but sunghoon is always there to help you whenever you need it.
it's not until you give him the first draft of your novel to read that he notices the few sex scenes that you also wrote. and listen, sunghoon is not easily getting jealous, he trusts you with his life, so how did words on paper were getting angry ? because he was. he could only imagine you thinking about all the dirty scenarios you wrote, all alone while he could have been there and make them come true. he couldn't help but wonder if you touched yourself while writing all this.Â
sunghoon didn't even reach the end of the novel before picking you up and carrying you to the bedroom. you don't even understand what's happening until your boyfriend starts to undress himself.Â
"you're such a naughty girl princess, writing all these things when you could've just told me that you wanted to get your ass spanked."
your cheeks were burning as you tried to defend yourself. yes, the sex scenes of your novel were self-indulgent, including all the fantasies you couldn't voice to sunghoon. but you didn't think that he would pick up on that. though he clearly did as he caged you in with his arms, lips inches away from yours.
"gonna make all these things you wrote real hm ?"
and he would so do that : manhandling you in all the positions you described, slapping your ass, fucking you rough until you cried and letting you sit on his face. eveyrthing you wrote, he did it ten times better, resulting in you orgasming too much time to count and your body dripping with sunghoon's cum.
"now you will tell me everything you want baby, right ?"
when you nodded mindlessly, too fucked out to focus on anything else than his beautiful face and his cocky smirk.
"good girl. you know i'm the only on to make you feel like that"
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reverb âą chapter eleven
synopsis: eren and (y/n) finally meet again after weeks apart, only to find themselves engaged in a weekend full of passionate love making. In the midst of their steamy rendezvous, EJ poses a question that not only leaves the shocked (y/n) stunned but himself as well..asking if sheâd like to go out with him. Not certain of how things will pan out if they decide to date, (y/n) is hesitant but then recalls a conversation sheâd had with her uncle just days prior. What will her answer be? Meanwhile, the aftermath of Arminâs annual party is revealed when he and Nieshaâs game of cat and mouse comes to a boiling head. Things only get worse when his affluent, billionaire parents invite him to dinner to discuss an important family matter. The carefree playboy is given news that will force him to make the hardest decision heâll ever have to face.
word count: 9.5K
content + themes: sexual themes, fluff, romance, mentions of tarot, spirituality and light work, violence, mentions of gang activity and guns, drug mentions, bits of angst, more flashbacks of (y/n)âs past, mentions of abuse, comedy + humor, crack, drama, choking but it turns sexual idk how to describe it, sorry, toxic, TOXIC behaviors I do not condone, angsty at the end
âWhatever choice you make, son. I support and always be proud..I wonât be upset with you no matter what but just make sure that itâs one you can live with.â
đ: thank you guys so much for sticking around and supporting this story! Iâm so happy when you guys send thoughtful comments and feedback, asks, etc. it makes my entire day and gives me so much motivation. I know yâall are probably sick of the cliffhangers but trust, thereâs a reason! đ anyways, I hope you like the story. Reblogs, comments, etc are very appreciated!! Also, I like to make the readerâs backstory as vivid as possible. Although you may not resonate with it personally, it is important to the story itself. So keep that in mind when reading, please.
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âWh-what?..wait, EJ..what are you saying?â
â..Thought I made myself pretty clear..I want to go on a date with you. Do this right..â
in that moment, time felt as if it were standing completely still..nothing about this entire ordeal felt like reality right now. There was no way that not only had you spent hours entangled in the sheets with EJ the Don, exchanging kisses, sweat and every other bodily fluid possible. There was no way you were in this famous rapperâs house, let alone his bed..and there was certainly no way in hell that he had just asked you out mid-orgasm..certainly you had to be dreaming! But alas, here you were with your bodies melded together as one. Those jade colored eyes beaming down at you with the most serene of energy. In a way, his words brought you comfort..peace. Normally, guys would try and pressure you into situations that you werenât ready for. Using sex as a clever segway into whatever their true goal was. But that wasnât the case with him. Truth be told, he didnât have to lie to get what he wanted..he was honest to a fault and maybe that was one of his biggest flaws. He couldnât be deceitful and that oftentimes led to him hurting peopleâs feelings. His little spat with Mikasa was a prime example..had he exercised a bit of restraint, maybe the situation wouldnât have blown up the way it had. With you, he was hoping to have the opposite effect. If he wanted you gone, you wouldâve been ass naked in the back of an Uber before the sun came up. He was the last man who had to lie his way into some pussy so obviously, he was coming from a place of sincerity. Pushing gently at his chest, (Y/N) shifted your head to the side, thinking that if you did not look at him directly, those pangs of butterflies wouldnât come rushing through your stomach. Instead, you were met with the soft grasp of his fingers underneath your chin. âOr not..â pausing to collapse next to you. Not only for a breather but because he felt as though he had set something wrong. Maybe he was being a little too forward and persistent. Or maybe he was a damn fool and this whole school kid, whirlwind crush was unrequited. But little did he know, you felt the exact same! Hell, maybe even stronger..it had been forever since youâd look at anyone the way you did him. And so what if it had only been two months since you guys knew each other? Youâd heard that age old cliche âlove at first sightâ more than you could count. Even if it wasnât quite to that stage yet, you knew it was far stronger than just sex. You both had set it in your minds, unbeknownst to the other..that if you fucked one more time and those feelings didnât remain, then youâd call it quits. But as you suspected..you were head over heels. Even when you finally managed to get some rest after the long night, you were dreaming of him. It was crazy! It honestly brought you back to a conversation you had just a few days priorâŠ
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flashbackâą five days ago: Wisteria Gardens Apartments âą southside
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The warm Florida sun peering down over the coast of Miami Beach, waves crashing subtly against sandy shores as patrons splashed through the cool waters and children built grainy castles. The picturesque view is the ideal representation of the bustling city. But lying within its intricate roadways and landscapes was an entirely different viewpoint. One far less appealing and inviting. Only those familiar with the areas would dare travel there..for them, ironically..it was home. The only place they felt welcomed. The projects. The ghetto..where many of Miamiâ elites got their start and oftentimes dubbed their stomping grounds. Including upcoming stars, (Y/N) (L/N) and Niesha Daniels. Residents of Opa Lockaâs infamous 8th Street. Where drug dealers and sex workers roamed frequently. Where those who only knew of violence and criminal activity thrived..but for you? It always brought forth a sense of nostalgia. The strange thing was, you werenât too far removed from the dire situation you grew up in but it felt unreal going from rubbing elbows with rockstars to now driving through your old hood with Dior shades on your eyes. You remember the nights that you and your granny would hear gunshots from down the street; getting word that one of her friendsâ grandsons or nephews had been involved in gang activity. Or the more joyful memories of you and Niesha walking to the corner store on Friday nights. Dressed just like the girls who were dubbed âhoochiesâ back in the day but sporting your sew ins, micros, long acrylics and gold earrings proudly. The smell of fresh fish frying and BBQ plates outside of the gas station while crowds chatted and danced. Dope boys stationed in the parking lot with the doors of their Chevy Impalas swung wide open, blasting Jeezy and Ross as you both walked by. Being cat called by men old enough to be your fathers as they shot dice in front of the store doorway. It was a very different life from the one you both lived now. Hence why you were back..hoping to gain some clarity from the one person you had been dreading to see since returning home. Navigating your new rose gold Mercedes G Wagon into the parking lot of the Wisteria Gardens Apartments, you pulled into an empty space, promptly killing the engine afterwards. On the opposite side of the large complex sat a duplex, tucked off in the corner. Luckily, that was your destination so you wouldnât be spotted. Neither would your vehicle. Stepping out in high-top brown and pink Dunks, biker shorts showing off your small leg tattoo and a Balenciaga sweatshirt. The 613 balayage flowed down your back and tied into a ponytail..(y/n) tossed the small crossbody over your shoulder and headed up to the front door on the left side, where you left two small knocks. It was then that you were greeted by the sound of serene music and bells playing. Youâd push the door once more to realize that it was not only unlocked but slightly ajar. If it told you anything, it was that the man inside was hard at work and awaiting you. âUnc? Uncle Bam..you home?â Silence.
That was until you heard the deep tone of a male answer you back.
âAbout time you showed up, honey..â turning around, you were greeted with the calming aura and deep set eyes of a tall, darker skinned male with a muscular build and neatly styled dreads. Around his neck hung an Eye of Horus pendant and crystals. It was him..
âUnc!â
âWelcome home, baby girl. Itâs been so long.â
akin to that of a little child, you leapt into his arms and beamed with joy! It had been roughly two years since youâd last been to his home. Travel and work had kept you so busy, you never had time. He was the only living family member that you had any sort of contact with from either side. Much like the many estranged ones, your uncle Benny, affectionately known as Bam around the area had grown up into a life of crime and as they always say with trouble, itâs easy to get in and even harder to get out of. He had spent his younger years in and out of prison before landing himself in there for fifteen years after beating the abuser of one of his closest friends nearly to death. He was a good man with a kind soul.
During his incarceration, he delved deep into spirituality. More so tarot and lightwork. An innate gift he knew he had possessed since childhood. He decided that once he got out, heâd walk the straight and narrow from then on out. Now a free man, he spends his days honing his craft here at his home; doing detailed readings, cleanses and spell work. As quiet as it was kept, he was the sole reason you were where you were right now. Shortly after the death of your grandmother, you were left alone. Your mom and her only daughter didnât even bother to show up to the funeral and once she did show her face, she caused a scene. Only coming around in hopes of claiming some inheritance so she could promptly go shoot it up in a back alley somewhere. Then there was your father, sitting idly in Florida State Prison, serving life after he committed the ultimate sin. Needless to say, you wanted no parts of either of them anyways.
But you needed someone and luckily, your uncle had gotten to a far better place since finishing out his stint. He was living in a very nice duplex home with his long time partner, Kelvin. Who was equally as kind and loving as he was. Without question, he allowed you to stay in the other half without paying a dime for as long as you pleased. The two had come upon some serious money from their old ventures and decided to invest their funds. Restoring old apartment complexes that had been previously overrun by gang members and providing low income housing to the residents. Sometimes even waiving rent payments altogether for those in need. Essentially investing back into the community they called home. He truly was your idol..especially since it was him who introduced you to pole as a means of stress relief and self expression. Soon, that hobby turned into untapped talent that he felt needed to be shared. So one day, you began sharing the videos to your bare Instagram feed, quickly accruing a large following. One thing led to another and now, you were performing on stages larger than life. Without him, there would be no Pole Assassins or (influencer name).
âI know..thatâs kinda my fault. Iâm sorry..been busy. Thank you for the biscuits by the way. They were so good.â
âDonât worry âbout it, chile. I know how much you used to love those things. Miss (grandmaâs name) used to make them for me all the time. Besides, I know them folks been keeping you on your toesss. But get that money. I ainât mad at you.â
uttering the sentiment in a rather feminine and expressive tone, waving his hand fan to feign off any smoke. Candles burned from the corners, along with pungent incense. It looked as if he were just in the middle of charging some crystals when you came in. But it was rather perfect timing..as he had predicted, youâd be making your way over. So he was prepared!
âGone take a seat, honey. Iâll get you some tea.â feeling just as cozy as you did years ago, youâd plop down in one of the plush, throne like chairs and wait for him to join you. Whilst he was pouring up a batch of his famous iced tea, you scoured the various decks of cards and oracles with your eyes. Fascinated by this unknown world, you could only imagine what this visit would entail. âSo..tell me how the life of the rich and famous has been treating my dear niece..howâs Beyonce and ânem?â sending you into a fit of laughter. He was such a card sometimes, always saying the first thing that comes to mind. âOoh..now Unc, you know Iâm far from that but..we're working on it. Itâs been good though..canât complain..â Just then, a wave of sudden sadness overtook you and youâd recall crying this morning. And almost instantly, heâd pick up on it.
âBut?..â
âBut what?..â
A question you and he both already knew the fateful answer to. You were severely depressed; a hole you couldnât seem to come out of. No matter how many accolades, accomplishments and even happy moments you accrued. It all felt meaningless..you still didnât have the two things you so desperately sought after. And if anyone knew that, it was him.
âYou still feel like you havenât done enough. Or rather..somethingâs missing.â You knew heâd read you like a book but if you knew that, youâd also know that he was far from done with his investigation. Finally working his way back to the table, heâd hand you the glass and take a seat before you. The two oracle decks you were previously looking over, heâd pick up and shuffle through. He was full and aware of how to help ease your worry and hopefully clear up some of your pressing questions. He had done it so many times before..it had been so long since youâd had one of his signature readings. Uncle Bamâs predictions were almost always spot on so if you could trust someoneâs intuition, even when it wasnât your own, you could trust him. âDonât worry,, we gonâ help you out. Take a couple breaths for me while I get these shuffled.â Without hesitation, you did so. Inhaling slowly and exhaling all the same with your eyes closed. This was always done to help center yourself before a reading; bringing you closer to the universe and to help you realize what it is you need to hear.
slowly but surely, heâd begin to dish out cards. Akin to that of a black jack dealer, theyâd fly onto the table face down and soon after, heâd flip them over. Taking a moment to mull over them, heâd place his finger to his chin and release a deep sigh. The look on his face had you concerned for a moment..as if he were contemplating something serious. Perhaps, you were in worse shape than you thought.
â..thereâs something youâve been feeling conflicted about. Somebody rather. Youâre scared..â the words drawing a look of concern and a slight gasp from between your lips. What exactly did he mean?
âThese feelings..theyâre strong. You feel so deeply for this person and you donât want to because youâre afraid of getting hurt. Afraid that they wonât feel the same. Itâs like you keep telling yourself, âitâs too soon..â You also feel like if you pursue this one thing, then you failed at everything else. Iâm seeing..flowers of some kind. Purple. Some flower that meant a lot to you. Maybe you saw something today that brought back intense memories for you. Maybe they even made you cry..â
as he was spouting off his visions, youâd feel a slight lump form in the back of your throat. It was heavy and hard to swallow. Afraid that if you did, youâd burst into tears right then and there. You hadnât uttered a word to Uncle Bam about your situation and you knew no one else could have either. Not about your grannyâs house, about Eren..nothing. Even Niesha, who was a notorious blabbermouth. He more than likely whisked right into your apartment with those biscuits and right out. As far as the flowers, he was spot on. The name of this place? Wisteria Gardens and ironically, it was the same plants that surrounded this complex. Much like the ones that used to grow in your grandmaâs yard every year. Beautiful, lavender flowers that hung like bearing fruit. Seeing them again dredged up those memories of playing in the yard and picking them for her vases. It was just his innate sense of intuition. He truly was a master of his craft. Divinity was his true calling! Heâd pull back for a moment and wipe his own eyes, reaching over for a burning stick, wrapped in twine and cloth. âWhew! Gonâ make me break the sage out in here..this is heavy, honey!..â breaking a bit of the tension and intense emotions up by making you laugh. âBut letâs keep going..â heâd continue surveying the cards and shuffling through. Picking out the ones that resonated with him the most. Fortunately, there was some good in this reading so heâd gravitate towards that.
â..But I see youâve also been feeling gracious. Iâm seeing a lot of gratitude. Youâre happy with how far youâve come. Thereâs something youâve had your eye on..maybe a new purse or some type of jewelry. Reward yourself, chile. Youâve earned it.â It was right then that heâd decide to place the cards down and remove his glasses, wiping up the remnants of his tears with a bit of laughter. Thatâs when heâd reach across the table to grasp your hands.
â(Y/N), sweetheart. Youâre a wonderful young woman. Always have been..you got a good head on your shoulders. For as long as I could remember, you never gave your grandma trouble. You were smart, even when things were hard for you, you did everything you were supposed to and Iâm so proud of you. It ainât been easy for you and hell, you couldâve ended up just like me, your mama and your daddy but you didnât..youâve come such a long way..â It was then that the words began to spill out as did your tears because it had been so long since youâd heard someone tell you that they were proud of you.
âThank you, Unc. Iâve been trying..I really have.â
But alas, that wasnât all he had to say. There was one more tidbit of advice he had to give. Looking you dead in your eyes, heâd hold your hands.
âI know, baby. Thatâs why Iâm telling you if you don't listen to anything else and I donât need these cards to say it, itâs this..go live your life. Youâve been working since you were seventeen. Ainât stopped since. Your granny would be so proud of you so go live. If this person is truly making you as happy as I can tell they are, go for it. Go find your peace, youâve earned it.â and with that, you knew from that moment, what had to be doneâŠ.
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So with this man now lying next to you, eyes averted to the covers because he was a little embarrassed, youâd hastily reach over and cup his face into another kiss before rolling over on top of him. âStop looking like that.â immediately, heâd begin to flush red and try to form a sentence but you rendered him impossible with your tongue. Brushing your fingers through his hair and straddling him. Just a moment ago, you seemed completely uninterested and now, you were trying to go at it again. What changed?
âOf course Iâd love to go out with you, EJ. Nothing would make me happier.â and you had just made him the happiest he had been in a while! Grabbing your waist, heâd break into an adorable cackle, just feeling so relieved that you hadnât rejected him. âThank goodness..â which brought you to a soft giggle in return. Which soon transformed into you full blown laughing. For the first time in a long time, youâd have a heartfelt laugh..
âWhatâs so funny?â
âNothing..I was just thinking about something.â
Flipping back over onto your side and running your finger down the perimeter of his chest, youâd place a gentle kiss along his cheek before coiling those smaller arms around his torso.
âSo what exactly did the brilliant EJ have in mind for a first date?â causing the rapper to gulp in response because out of all his areas of expertise, romance wasnât his strong suit. The fact that he had actually managed to bag your fine ass in the first place was an achievement in and of itself! Now, he was left with the task of ensuring that he kept you around..cradling his arm around you, heâd look down with a soft grin and place a kiss to your forehead. Trying his hardest to lay on the charm.
âWell, I was thinking maybe a nice dinner, a little walk on the beach..â but as his words trailed off, something told you that wasn't exactly his style. He seemed far too laid back for the luxurious, pompous date nights..but he was trying to be as chivalrous as possible. After all, it wouldnât be the slightest bit polite to take a woman he had spent all night going raw in for burgers and fries on an official first date! Even so, you wanted him to be comfortable as well. Something youâd both enjoy. Not only that, if you wanted to do this right and not just be two people sleeping together without the slightest clue about the other..then it was important to just let go of the awkward jitters and ask outright what your interests were. No need in being shy after all that had happened. No need in being afraid..this was a safe space.
âUnless..thereâs something else you wanted to do.â which prompted you to start giggling yet again. And this time, his little cheeks flustered red and heâd stare yet again, feeling embarrassed. Nobody had tripped EJ the Don up quite like you. Here he was stumbling over himself like a bumbling idiot and all of that confidence he had used to seduce you was flying out the window. Even so, you thought it was just the cutest thing ever. âNot at all. That actually sounds really nice but..I wanna know what it is you like to do. Not just what you think will impress me. In factâŠâ stopping amid your rant to run a finger down the center of his chest. âI wanna get to know the man behind all of that music. The real you..I mean, donât get me wrong. I love me some EJ but..Eren? He seems a lot cooler and I canât wait to meet him.â And for the first time in a long time, his heart would begin to flutter..beating out of his chest because no woman had ever asked him such a thing. Granted, he was putting them out before they could get too close but deep down, he knew they only wanted one thing and that was to use his namesake for a come up. They didnât care about who he was outside of the chains, money and fame. He was a meal ticket and nothing more. And here you were, wanting to see him for who he truly was. To hell with waiting or being too soon, he had to make you his before somebody else came and snatched you up!
âWeâre a little past favorite colors and TV shows, donât you think?â
âNo better time than the present, sweetheart. Maybe we can talk about it..after we get a shower.â
Which didnât sound like too bad of an idea right now. The only question was what you were going to wear, seeing as how you arrived in nothing more than a bikini and had been wearing nothing but his sheets and body fluids since. But heâd figure something out. For now, you two of you could continue your âbondingâ under the warm waters of a shower head.
âGuess youâre right. Speaking of..what do you like for breakfast? I can have my assistant go getââ
âI was actually thinking Iâd cook a little something. If you donât mind. The restaurants on this side of town canât make breakfast worth a damn. They crack an egg on the plate, smear some sauce around and charge a hundred dollars for it. No thanks..hope you like grits.â
that was all he needed to hear to be confident that he had made the right decision..you were everything he had been looking for in a woman!..grinning from ear to ear, Eren would roll to his side and hop up, gently tugging you up afterwards.
âOr do you northerners not know anything about that?â
âGive me some credit now. Iâve been living among you country bumpkins long enough to know about grits. And other things too.â
It felt good to know that neither of you had to put on a facade around one another. And with that, the witty banter and jokes ensued. Poking fun at one another like old friends.
âOh, is that so? Like what?â questioning as the two of you walked towards the bathroom. Itâs then that heâd lift up your arm and twirl you around to examine your backside, even leaving a light slap to watch it ripple. âI know that it didn't come from a doctor. Thatâs gotta be greens and cornbread. Got to be.â Shaking his head in pure awe at how thick you were. The one thing he loved about living in the south were the women..the girls who were homegrown and country fed. Long before he was surrounded by BBL bodies, he was blessed with the fortune of seeing the ladies that didnât need a knife. The ones that had the kind of ass that would make somebody do a double take and clutch their chest. But even so, heâd send you into a fit of laughter, playfully slapping his chest.
âGet away from me. Play too damn much.â
âWhat?! I didnât lie..matter of fact, lemme get a closer look.â
Playfully chasing you into the shower where the second bout of your morning would surely ensue. There wasnât a single doubt that you two would have no problem adjusting into a relationship.
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But unfortunately, the same couldnât have been said for you guysâ best friendsâŠthe people both of you adored more than anything and the ones who had been seeing one another long before (y/n) and Eren even decided to hook up. Armin and Niesha werenât exactly seeing eye to eye at the moment, which wasnât anything out of the ordinary. Seeing as how both of them truly only got along when they were fucking like rabid animals. Otherwise, it was a toxic game of cat and mouse. A test to see who could make the other jealous first. Posted up with this girl and hugging that dude. Childish antics if youâd ever seen any. Nonetheless, it worked for the chaotic pair. That was until last Friday at that yacht party, when it all came to a very explosive head.
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flashback: part two - miami port
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âSo you gone sit and play in my face like that?! You gone lie and tell me you wasnât with the bitch? Armin, who do you think I am?â
âAnd if I was..what exactly are you going to do about it? But since you asked, Niesha. Iâll tell you exactly who you are..an idiot. I mean, no offense, baby but you have to be out of your fucking mind to think that we were anything more than this. What? You thought because I brought you a couple purses, some jewelry that me and you would be together? Sweetheart, you are nothing more than some stress relief. Donât get ahead of yourself. Iâll admit, the pussy was good..amazing even but I donât plan on settling any time soon. Especially not with someone like you.â
words that stung like bees, ones that should have been cutting deep and sending her into hysterics..if it were anyone else! But it was just as (Y/N) had said:
âHavenât met a dude she hadnât left crying yet.â
and just as she had predicted, Armin was up next! Rather than bursting into tearful sobs and cries, he was met with cackles and hearty laughs. A tattooed hand and long acrylics covered her mouth as her head flew back. Eventually doubling over in laughter.
âWhat the fuck is so funny?â His nerves obviously rattled by how unbothered she was. He knew that Niesha was crazy and hell, that was half the excitement but damn, any other woman would have at least slapped and said she hated him. Here she was cackling like shit was sweet..just what was this girlâs problem?!
âYou done? Like I said, Armin..who do you think I am? You can save them lilâ weak ass insults for a bitch with no self esteem. I said it before and Iâll say it again..âyou not going nowhere. And neither am I..â standing ten toes down in her sentiment, even folding her legs and pretending to swipe over her long nails. Completely unfazed by anything heâd said before. However, Armin was a little stirred in his spirit. Always getting riled up when he was with Niesha. That was the effect sheâd had on him since the first night they met. Heated arguments turned to fiery, passionate sex that was always better than the last. But tonight, heâd decided he had enough and was calling it quits for good. He had to..otherwise, he was going to lose his own damn mind!
âOh..you thought I was mad about that lilâ brokedown girl you had in your Insta story. If youâre gone try to make me jealous, at least get a bitch with all her teeth. Have some class.â and it was then that heâd retort back, trying to defend himself. He had been pacing the floor of the master bedroom suite in the shipâs cabin, trying not to lose his cool but this girl was really testing his patience. She had the nerve to cheat when he had spent all of that money on her?! The nerve. What made her so special from all the rest of the girls that fell in love with him?
âSays the one fucking half of The Miami Heat. Donât try to check me for some shit when youâre doing the same thing. I saw you with him, Niesha.â
âThatâs right. While you were getting neck from olâ gummy bear, I was getting my shit cracked. Iâm not your bitch so what are you mad for? This free game.â And little was he aware of the can of worms that he had popped open.
âYou know what your problem is? Youâre entitled. You try to compensate with all these lilâ hoes because youâre really a loser, baby. You think theyâll actually fuck with you if you ainât have the bread you did? Câmon now. Flexing mommy and daddyâs money âcause you wouldâve never made it otherwise. Went and got you a chain, some tattoos and started showing your ass. But the real Armin? Ainât nothing but a square ass âlil nigga looking for approval because his parents never gave it to him. You are so used to everybody kissing your ass because you throw a lilâ change in their face. But Iâm not one of them. Ion care about you or your money. That bag? I already had two. Your lilâ necklace? I gave that shit away. We wouldnât be together..you right..community dick is good for one thing and thatâs never being seen in public with it. Matter of fact, I think Connie and Ony are here tonight. Might go see what their fine asses are hitting for. I need a real man.â
Suddenly, sheâd stand to her feet and begin making the trek towards the door. As if nothing had happened but Armin was not about to let that happen. âShit, if my sister hadnât got to him first, maybe I wouldâve fucked EJ too. Heard that dick was hittingââ suddenly, any bit of restraint and level headedness he may have had..went straight out of the window. Before she could walk out, Armin would grab her arm and force her against the wall. âWatch your fucking, Niesha.â Causing her to start cackling yet again. It was as if nothing phased this woman. His words may have meant nothing but hers hurt like a bitch! Insulting him, playing on his insecurities and then proudly admitting that sheâd fuck his best friends?! Sheâd gone too far! He had gotten so worked up, heâd hadnât even realized that his hand was latched around her throat. Immediately freezing because heâd never in his life hurt a woman and if she brought him to that point, then she had to go but before he could take it away..the look in Nieshaâs eyes told a different story..one that thoroughly enjoyed the sensation of his hands around her neck and even signified it by biting her lip; sucking her teeth in a lecherous manner. This toxicity truly got her excited!
âMmmâŠnow I like that shit.â Getting visibly aroused at the vice grip he had on her. Even prompting him to squeeze tighter because itâd get her wetter. All Armin could do was laugh because once again, she had worn him down and pulled him right back into her trap.
âYouâre a crazy bitch, you know that?..or maybe Iâm the crazy one for fucking with you..â
Just then, heâd feel his thumb between her plump lips, being suckled on and her deep set, dark, siren like eyes laser focused on him and his biggest weakness..that sweet little voice that she always drew him in with.
âMaybe..but..â and before she could complete the sentence, heâd have her up against the dresser, legs spread and her thong pushed to the side. âYouâre right, Iâm not going anywhere. And youâre sure as hell not. This pussy belongs to me, act like you remember.â This time, tugging her by her hair with the same force; proof that he was done playing games with her. He was going to show her what a real man was alright! âNow put that fucking phone down..â That slight grimace in his voice sent to her spine and her sensitive spot. She loved seeing him like this. Hence why she got his ass in an uproar in the first place. She wanted to get him as angry as possible to get him to take his frustration out on her. âMm..whatever you say...â
Because in the end, she always got her way. And Armin? Heâd finally met his match!
ââââ±*.ïœĄ:ïœĄâ±*.:ïœĄâ§*.ïœĄâ°ââââââââ±*.ïœĄ:ïœĄâ±*.:ïœĄâ§*.ïœĄâ°ââââ
Hence why, at the moment, he was headed into the Nobu, one of Miamiâs premier eateries. Notorious for feeding some of the cityâs most elite. Tonight, theyâd be hosting the Artlerts..the leaders of a multi billion dollar conglomerate, earning their fortune in oil and technology..stemming back from the early nineteen hundreds. Needless to say, they were descendants of old money and Armin, was a direct beneficiary and byproduct of such wealth and he certainly took advantage of it. However, his parents had contacted him earlier in the week to inform him that theyâd be flying into town and that there was important business that they needed to discuss with him. What exactly they had to discuss was a mystery..however, all would soon be revealed. Dressed in one of his several designer ensembles; an all black Armani suit..turtleneck tucked into his slacks with a matching belt buckle. Covering the plethora of tattoos that littered his body. Silver rings adorning his fingers and a matching necklace. Coordinated and fitting just right..the potent aroma of Tom Ford cologne radiating from his body..he truly looked like a million bucks. But unfortunately, his mood didnât exactly match his current physical shape. Being with family should have been a monumental occasion. Marked with laughs, good times and love. And for the bright eyed, young producer..it was in his earlier years. As the only child to wealthy entrepreneurs and presumably, the heir to a massive fortune, they poured every ounce of adoration, care and their limitless resources into ensuring that Armin had the best upbringing possible. Private schools, tutors, a fully funded college education, and the best things that life had to offer. Which paid off..Armin excelled in every aspect of his life. Top tier grades; which earned him a steady four point six average until he graduated college with a degree in marine biology. He played baseball, basketball and rugby, an aficionado in all three and was even his universityâs point guard up until junior year. Needless to say, he was his parentsâ pride and joy. But it seemed as of late, that satisfaction seemed to have dissipated a bit. The Artlerts had high expectations for their child. Naturally, they supported anything that he wanted to explore and backed him one hundred percent..however, they werenât betting on any of those ventures including making music. Less known, in the hip-hop industry. Granted, they had no qualms about it. If thatâs what made him happy and he put his entire focus into it, then it was all that they could ask of their son.
That just wasnât the case for Armin though. As successful and bright as he was, he was equally as reckless and rambunctious. Drinking, partying and laying up with various girls. Although he kept his parents out of the loop, it didnât take long before word of his antics made it back to them via their inside sources who kept tabs on him and it was safe to say that they were not happy.
Hence why he was so nervous to meet with them tonight..the shame and embarrassment that was beginning to set in. He knew that his family would either scold him until they were red in the face or just give him a lecture of pure disappointment. Either way, he wasnât much in the way of hearing it. Regardless, heâd traipse into the lofty establishment, hands tucked into the pockets of his suit as the hostess greeted him. Having quite the reputation and prestige, she informed him that his party was waiting and saw him to his table immediately. Glass chandeliers hung from the ceilings and cerulean lighting illuminated the dimmed dining area. Tables and booths lined with silky white cloths and perfectly folded napkins, seated next to polished silverware. Wine glasses filled with crystalline water and patrons, unmistakable members of the upper echelons chatted among their peers about finances, private trips and shopping sprees. It all felt so suffocating!
âArmin, darling! So glad you made it..â
Suddenly, a middle aged woman with honey blonde tufts, styled into loose curls, deep blue eyes and a pink satin gown with fur doused across her shoulders arose from her seat to drape her arms around him. The exorbitant pearls hanging from her neck and the Elizabeth Taylor perfume surrounded Armin like a warm embrace.
âMom! Itâs so good to see you.â grinning from ear to ear. No matter how old he grew or the amount of time that passed, heâd forever be his momâs baby. Or as she could so affectionately dub him, her âpumpkin pie.â Because he was so sweet as a child. Seated next to her, was a man with a lighter variation of the hair color and features, with the exception of stubble and slightly thicker brows. His voice rang out with a stronger vibrato as he greeted his child. âGood to see you, son.â âDad..good to see you too..â Reaching over to extend his arms for a hug. The tension had somewhat subsided from Arminâs body..seeing his folks again. At the end of the day, he was their baby regardless of what he did. âPlease, have a seat.â
however, the news they came to deliver was going to do little to make him feel settled once revealed. Pulling his chair out, Armin would do as his mom instructed, taking a swig of water afterwards. âSo..howâve you been, Armin?â His mother made the first inquisition. Out of genuine concern and to break the proverbial ice. It always was easier for him to open up around her. Heâd go on to tell them that he had been doing fine and that he was set to go on tour soon with his boys. They were working on some big projects and he was doing fine. Completely omitting the fact that his promiscuous, womanizing ways had caught up to him recently. Granted, he wasnât going to let Niesha or her nonsense take him off of his true course but he couldnât continue on playing these games..it was fun but it was also taxing. Even so, he couldnât stay away from her. Thatâs how addictive it was. His mom seemed to be pleased by the update..her son in good health and spirits was all that she could ask for. Even if she didnât exactly understand Arminâs career choice or even agree with it at times, it made her smile knowing that her son was happy..seeing him beam with excitement as he talked about working with these amazing artists and the upcoming festival his label was putting together. He also mentioned getting to work with the Pole Assassins and how they were bringing something new and innovative to the industry. His mother would grin and giggle, listening and even asking pertinent questions, ones that he was happy to answer. It took his mind away from all the other things and possibilities that could have been coming with this conversation. âOh sweetie..Iâm so proud of you. It sounds like youâre having a wonderful time.â Sheâd hoist her glass with a cheery expression and take a sip to commemorate his success. Thatâs when heâd glance over to his father, who shared a similar expression, faintly grinning and nodding.
âI have to agree. Itâs good to see you doing something you love, son. Very proud of you.â His father would nurse his champagne once more before setting his glass back to the crisp tablecloth. Regardless of how he felt, his parents had never put this immense pressure on him or made him feel inadequate for his choices. Many of his peers who had also come from esteemed backgrounds were constantly under the scrutiny of their guardians. They were working in prestigious, lucrative fields, making endless amounts of wealth and doing great things. And still didnât have their familyâs respect. Armin was truly fortunate. Even so, it didnât stop them from worrying. It didnât stop them from being afraid that one day, the entertaining lifestyle would catch up with him. They werenât blind or stupid..not by a long shot. They knew their son partook in all of the things that his and his friends lyricsâ entailed. âSo..are you seeing anyone? Is there a lucky girl in your life?â His dad, who had always teased him, knew how flustered he became, mainly because despite his playboy appearance now..his son was the most adorable nerd in his former life! âAh-well..you know. Iâm just kinda..keeping my options open.â Part of him was ashamed and another half was nervous. Ashamed that he couldnât present his folks with a suitable young lady. That he hadnât brought a date to any of their meetings..he was aware that they wanted him to get married, start a family but he just wasnât ready to commit to that yet. He wanted to have fun, mess around and more so..have his fill! He didnât want just one lady. It wasnât his style..on the other hand, he was nervous..nervous because he could no longer deny the feelings he had for that insane woman. Regardless of how batshit crazy Niesha drove him, sheâd had her claws sunk into his skin deep and he didnât want anyone else but her.
Even at his party, after fighting with her and everything, he made love to her as if he were hoping to make her stay and although she was just saying the most evil things..she told him she loved him. Crying it into his ear as she held him close. Heâd been with a couple girls here and there but all he could think about was where she was..was she thinking of him too? He was nervous because if he could no longer fight his urges, would he be able to bring her home? Would they accept her?âŠwould they still be proud of their baby boy? She came from an entirely different world than him. One he loved being a part of. She was wild, rambunctious and unfortunately, couldnât flip a switch the way he did. Maybe thatâs why he was so obsessed with her ass! She lived in her truth twenty four seven. There was no faking with her..and ironically, he admired that. And despite what she said, she actually gave a damn about him..unlike the others. She was honest, she made him care about himself and didnât allow him to stay in bad places too long. It was crazy..
âWell Iâm sure the right girl will come along soon..â â..yeah, unless you just have no game.â His father uttered with a sly look, making Armin scoff and laugh as he took another sip. âYou wish, old man. I have many problems but thatâs not one.â He always enjoyed when he and his dad would banter back and forth. It reminded Armin that he was human and not this billionaire machine, who only focused on amassing profit. âAlright, this old dog could teach you some tricks. All you have to do is ask.â The three would laugh, joke and have a wonderful time. âOh please, donât let him fool you. He was a scared wreck when he asked me on our first date. His friends had to deliver his love letter during class because he was so nervous. Adorable, really.â âIt was called delegating tasks. I just knew youâd say yes.â "You're so full of it.."
He was truly enjoying this time and feeling back to himself. He felt as if he could truly be honest and open with them. More so than when he was younger..they werenât inherently strict but they kept him on a tight leash so that he didnât wind up like some of his other classmates; taking Adderall and Xans during ski trips or family gatherings. He was the one and only heir to the Artlert Industries fortune. Hence why once their meals were brought out, theyâd pose another question..
âHope you donât mind, we ordered for you since we had no idea when youâd arrive. Your favorite.â And they were spot on. Linguine with spinach and lobster. âNot at all..thank you.â As he took the first bite of his dish, thatâs when Mr. Artlert would look directly up at his son..
âArmin..do you like making music? Is this something you enjoy?..â
The question came as a bit of a shock, honestly. Truth be told, he hadnât thought about that in depth. Armin first began delving into music as an adolescent..he sang in the church choir as a young kid and was gifted his first instrument when he was twelve years old. It was the core link that bonded him and EJ together so for him, it was essentially something that changed his life. He honestly had never thought about doing anything else..
âOf course..I wouldnât if I didnât. Why do you ask?â but it was more than just genuine curiosity and sudden interest in his sonâs career that had the Artlert matriarch inquiring. There was an entirely different reason other than quality time that had prompted this dinner as well. Truth was, the Artlerts had been keeping a rather worrisome secret from their son and was contemplating when would be the appropriate time to divulge. Now was as good as any..might as well rip the bandage off and come clean. Clearing his throat, Mr. Artlert would take a swig of his wine before proceeding.
âArmin..your mom and I..we..â
At that moment, his stomach began to sink to its lowest pit and heâd begin to form a hard lump in his throat. What exactly did they have to tell him? Why were they stalling?!..Just then, his cerulean eyes began to dilate twice their size and even well up a bit. Were they getting a divorce? Did something happen to the company? He wished that theyâd say something! But heâd wait no further because his mom would grasp a nearby handkerchief and press it to her face to conceal her inevitable tears. âMom..whatâs wrong? Please!..tell me.â his parents were his entire world and he couldnât imagine anything causing them grief. But soon, heâd join in on the heavy feelings when his dad confessed something that he wasnât expecting.
âSon..I went to the doctor last week and he informed me that they found something. A tumor..â the words seemed to have frozen time in its very tracks and shook the young producer to his core. He couldnât believe it. âA-a tumor? Wait..are you?--â no! He couldnât even say it! He couldnât even fathom such a horrendous thought. Clutching his glass, Arminâs hands began to tremble and his breathing was labored. How could they keep such a secret?! How could they not tell him sooner?..the thought of something happening to the man that he so desperately admired and looked up to was terrifying.. he was scared to pry any further. Almost becoming childlike but just as he had done during his upbringing, Arminâs father would ease his mind.
âFortunately..they did catch it in time so before it becomes too far malignant but the next couple months on my treatment will be crucial. Iâm doing everything I can to ensure that I wonât become ill. Iâve hired the best team of doctors and Iâm currently on sabbatical from the company. My board of advisors have already made proper arrangements as well. Iâve taken all precautions.â
It was a relief, truly. Although he wasnât out of the woods yet, he still had a fighting chance and that was more than enough for Armin. However, it wasnât the only reason for his disclosure. He had an ultimatum of sorts for his son.
âArmin..you are the one and sole heir to the family business. Once Iâm no longer around, you will be the one to step in. How you choose to proceed is your choice entirelyââ âDonât talk like that..donât talk like youâve already given up.â
He couldnât stand it and although he assured him things would be fine, he couldnât believe that until he had an official clean bill of health and stopped speaking as if he knew something Armin didnât. But this was a pivotal moment..one where Armin would have to, for once in his life..make a hard decision. One that would require sacrifice..
"I'm going to fight as hard as I can, you have my word. I won't let something like this get me. But I have to know that you'll work just as hard to ensure your future. You've always been a bright young man and I trust that you'll continue to do what's best for you.."
it didn't take a rocket scientist to get what exactly he was implying. How far could music truly take him? Was it sustainable?...he wasn't sure. He wasn't sure how to process any of this but what he did know was that this wasn't going to be an easy road and he had a lot to contemplate from here on out.
"I'd be lying if I said that I am a fan of what you do. Canât stand it. The music..the partying, all of it is not what I envisioned for you. Sometimes makes your mother and I feel as though we failed." Quite brutal but he could only speak from his heart. Tough love was sometimes necessary, even at the expense of his feelings. But there was one thing that he wanted his son to know above all else:
" That said..I love you, son. We both do..âWhatever choice you make, I support and always be proud..I wonât be upset with you no matter what but just make sure that itâs one you can live with.â
and something told him that his time to decide was running out..
ââ  ïœĄïŸâ: *.✠.* :âïŸ.âââ ââ  ïœĄïŸâ: *.✠.* :
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Deck the Halls (and not your partner) - part 7
the mistletoe scene I have to give credit to the lovely @novelizt because of this post
this is basically just 3.5k words of fluff to make up for all the pain I put you through the last two parts
Word count: 3.5k
Warnings: swearing, making out (it's happening people, but also it's mildly in detail so for the one tiny paragraph feel free to skip if you're either not comfortable with it or not old enough), Will asks the important questions (both sensible and not), brief mentions of self-esteem issues? lockwood is a bit silly at the end, actually they both are
series master list
(why does he look like this :3 đ)
"What?" Y/n breathed. She wasn't entirely sure that she'd heard Lockwood correctly.
"I said that I think I've fallen for you."
He looked so sincere, his eyes more vulnerable than she had ever seen them before, and Y/n felt her heart constrict in her chest.
"You..."
"I know, I know." He rubbed his hand over his face, turning to lean back against the window. The mistletoe still hung at his side in his other hand.
"But you were horrible to me! From the very start!"
"I know. I was awful to you that first night and my only excuse is that I was exhausted and in desperate need of my bed, which I know isn't good enough. And then when you came in for your interview I just didn't want to be the one responsible if anything happened to you - wait, that came out wrong. You walked into the doorframe, Y/n. I was worried that you'd hurt yourself on a job, and I didn't want to get too attached to you in case that happened and you got injured or hospitalised or worse and I couldn't do anything to stop it. When I saw how easily the others took to you I knew that I was doomed," he let out a laugh, shaking his head. Y/n hoped he realised how ridiculous he sounded. "I know that doesn't excuse my actions, Y/n, but I meant what I said about that job we took in March. I really thought I wouldn't get there in time and I was terrified."
"Lockwood... you can't just... say that! I mean, you have said some genuinely horrible things to me and now you're saying that you - you what? That you-"
"I don't know!" he cried, filled with exasperation. "Alright? I don't know how else to describe it! I don't know if how I feel is love because I've never felt like this before, but I do know that I care about you far more than I should given I'm your boss, and I really don't know what would happen to me if you got seriously hurt, alright?" He was out of breath, cheeks flushed as he looked at her, and Y/n felt her own face heating up at his admission.
"Okay, okay," she said quietly, still processing everything he'd said. They stayed there for a few minutes, both leaning back against the windows as they tried to figure out what the hell they were going to do now. "I don't..." Y/n broke off with a sigh. She needed to phrase this right or they would be in even deeper shit than they were before. "I don't think I can just... forgive you, Lockwood. You have a lot - and I mean a lot - of grovelling to do to make up for how you've treated me these last few years." He nodded frantically, hope starting to shine in his eyes.
"Anything," he said. "Anything at all." She knew that he meant it.
"And I want to go on more cases if I'm staying at the company, because you can't just keep me behind because you think I'll walk into a doorframe."
"Done." He paused for a moment, looking like he wanted to say something else. "But you have-"
"Nope! No protests, thank you!" He stopped talking immediately, looking rather like a lost puppy as he gazed at her. "No more hating each other, either, although I feel like that's a given. And the first date had better be fucking incredible, alright?"
"... First... date?"
"Yeah, keep up, Schmoopie." She couldn't deny how her heart lifted at the sight of Lockwood looking so happy, and when he grinned her responding smile was involuntary.
"Wait... so do you... you know. How do you feel, about..." he waved his hands vaguely in the air, then accidentally hit himself in the face with the mistletoe. "Shit, I think that went in my eye. I forgot I was holding that," he grumbled, and Y/n didn't bother biting back her snort. He sent her a glare, but there was only amusement behind it.
"I don't really know, Lockwood."
"Anthony."
"What?"
"If we're going to start dating I'd much rather you called me Anthony." He blushed and went quiet as he looked out the window. "I like it better when you call me Anthony anyway. Sorry, I uh, I interrupted you."
"Oh, no, that's... that's alright. Uh... yeah. Like you said, I don't know how to describe it. I know that it really hurt me when you said that you wouldn't ever feel the same way, and I guess I just didn't want to admit to myself that I care about you a lot too because you were such a huge arsehole to me-"
"Yes, got it, sorry again."
"-but I do care about you, Anthony. A lot. And honestly that does annoy me because I'm pretty sure I've liked you since we met because I did think you were really gorgeous, except then you were really rude and-"
"Wait wait wait wait wait," he exclaimed, waving his hands in front of him. "You think that I'm gorgeous?"
Now it was Y/n's turn to feel her face heat up, and she swatted at his hands. "I did, yeah. Then you opened your mouth."
"Oh."
"Yeah." She waited a moment, then spoke again. "If you must know, I still think you're gorgeous," she muttered, and Anthony lit up, a smug smile landing on his face. Surprisingly she'd missed them, and while she still felt the burning flames in her body at the sight of that stupid smirk, it was no longer hatred.
He stepped forward a little (only a little, since they were back to being incredibly close to each other) and held the mistletoe in both of his hands. "Your grandma Jean gave it to me," he said. "She told me we might need it because it used to be a symbol of peace, and if people met under it they had to stop fighting." They both had been looking down at the plant, but when Anthony lifted his head so did she, and her breath caught in her throat at the look in his eyes.
"So you want to kiss me again?"
"I mean, I wouldn't be entirely opposed to that, if you're offering."
"Really? Really, Anthony?" Her tone was joking, but she felt him move back almost imperceptibly when she didn't immediately agree to it, and her heart skipped a beat when she realised he was waiting for her permission.
"Well I can't kiss you if we aren't under it, can I? So I don't know what you're so worried about, darling."
"Better try and catch me then if you want a kiss," she teased, and leapt away a second later.
"We're running now? When we've just had a huge meal?" He stepped forward anyway, and Y/n laughed with pure joy when he started chasing her around the room, attempting to catch her but just missing every time. Finally she tripped, catching her foot on the corner of the bed, and Anthony swept her into his arms to stop her from hitting the floor. Instead they hit the mattress, Y/n landing on her back and Anthony on top of her, his arms bracing his body while he still clutched the mistletoe in his left hand. They were both breathing heavily from the last five minutes of running and laughing, and now their faces were so close together that they were essentially kissing already.
Anthony held up the mistletoe over their heads the best he could while simultaneously not collapsing on Y/n, and he raised his eyebrows at her. "May I kiss you, darling?" She couldn't speak, so she nodded instead, and within a second his mouth was on hers, somehow better than it had been the first time. It was tentative and small, and he pulled back to flick his gaze between her eyes and her lips. It had left her breathless despite how short it had been, and before she could think they were crashing into each other with the same passion as they had the night before, her hands lifting to grab his hoodie and his hair in desperation. At some point Anthony dropped the mistletoe to move his hand to her waist and bring her closer to him.
There was nothing but him, nothing but the weight of his body on top of hers and his hands touching her and his tongue in her mouth, and then he was pulling back for air and she was chasing after his lips, and he was smiling down at her like she was the only thing that mattered.
For whatever reason, they started laughing, Anthony dropping his head to nestle in the crook of her neck while Y/n wrapped her arms around his torso to bring him impossibly closer.
"So... does this mean I can call you my girlfriend?" he asked, hope making him light up like the Christmas tree they had in the living room.
"Yes, Anthony, you can call me your girlfriend," she laughed, and it turned into a snort when he got up and did a celebratory dance. "You're ridiculous, you know that?"
"Oh, believe me darling, I am fully aware."
~~~
"Hey, Squeak. You alright?"
Y/n had been sitting in the library, staring out the window at the snow that had started falling while she tried to concentrate on the book in her hands. Anthony had been called into the living room by her parents, and they'd parted with a not-so-small kiss just out of view of her family. Will had apparently managed to find her, and was settling into the opposite side of the window seat that she was occupying. "Yeah, why wouldn't I be?"
"I dunno. You seemed a bit... off. At dinner. Is everything alright with you and Lover Boy?"
"Oh," her face burned at the memory of what had happened barely twenty minutes ago. "Yeah, we're all good." She awkwardly sent him a thumbs up, her smile more of a grimace than anything else, and Will looked unconvinced.
"What's really going on, Y/n/n? Because if I need to beat him up-"
"NO! No, don't... don't beat up my boyfriend, please." It felt weird calling Anthony her boyfriend now, despite it being more real than it ever had been before. "Really, we're fine."
"Fine? You're fine? What did you two talk about upstairs? Because I'm pretty sure I heard shouting."
"We were just..." At the look on her brother's face she trailed off, and glanced at the door to make sure it was closed. "What exactly did Mum say when she got off the phone with me a few days ago?"
"What do you mean?"
"When she told people that I had a boyfriend, what did she say? How did you find out?"
"Mum went into the kitchen to take your call because we were all in here playing board games, and then we heard her shout 'You have a boyfriend?!' and Linda went to investigate, and then you turned up with Lover Boy."
"And are you sure that Mum wasn't just... making it up for some reason?"
"Why would she make it up?"
"Because I didn't have a boyfriend, Will."
"But... if you don't have a boyfriend then why the hell are you making out with your boss?"
"We are not making out!"
"Sure. But when you kissed yesterday under that mistletoe," he pointed to where it hung over the library door, "I definitely saw tongue."
"WILL!" She picked up the nearest pillow and chucked it at his head, then hid her face behind her book. "Oh my god, this is not happening."
"Ok, but that still doesn't answer my question," he said after half-heartedly throwing the pillow back at her. "If you didn't have a boyfriend, then why is your boss here saying that you're dating?"
"Because I made him. We actually can't stand each other. Or, we couldn't. We made up. Ugh, this is complicated. We have hated each other for about three years and then when Mum said very loudly that I was bringing my boyfriend to Christmas in front of Linda I didn't have much of a choice but to bring someone or face utter humiliation. Apparently nobody wanted to go to the middle of the countryside for three days with a complete stranger and pretend to be her boyfriend so I had to ask Anthony because George was already busy, and honestly I think we did a pretty good job of hiding the fact that we hated each other."
"And the shouting was you making up? Or were you angrily making out?"
"Will! Fuck's sake! Making up. I did tell him he's got a lot of grovelling to do, but now we're actually together."
"So you did make out."
"What's with the weird obsession about whether or not I'm making out with him?"
"I just like making you uncomfortable. That's my job."
"Well quit your job and get a different one." They sat in silence for a while, just staring out the window at the dark landscape. Although she knew that Will couldn't see them, she still pointed out the few ghostly figures that she saw. Her Sight wasn't nearly as good as Anthony's when she wasn't using her Touch, but she could still make out the glowing shapes in the fields.
"While we're on the topic of jobs... I'm guessing you're not leaving the company anymore," he said after a while.
"What?" she asked, startled by his words. "What do you mean?"
"I heard you at dinner, Squeak. You said you were gonna leave the company. I didn't hear anything else 'cause Nanna Jean was talking to me about her garden again for like, the eighth time today, but when I heard you say that... I dunno. You love your job, and I didn't think there was anything that would make you leave it."
"I wouldn't have stopped being an agent, I would have just moved company. He said a lot of mean things, and in fairness I said some horrible shit too, but he's not got that much power over me."
"Squeak... are you sure you wanna be dating him? If he hurt you so bad that you wanted to leave the company then I don't know if it's the best idea," Will frowned, concern in every inch of his body.
"I know. If he fucks this up then I am leaving. Properly. Because I know that it's not... ugh, I don't know. I was just tired of not being treated in the same way that he treated the others, and he's explained why he was like that, and he was weirdly similar to a puppy when he apologised - not that that convinced me to date him, by the way - and I really hurt him too, over the years."
"Just... out of interest... what exactly did you say to each other that made you start hating each other this much?"
"I was walking back from a solo case, walked into him, apologised, stepped on his shoes, and he told me that he'd just bought them in the most stuck-up voice I had ever heard and it pissed me off." Will stared at her.
"That's... it?"
"To be fair I then went for an interview at his company, didn't realise it was him, and the moment I walked in he went 'we don't want agents like you' or something, so... you know!"
"Okay... that's still not a lot though. You really started what, three years of hatred based on... on that?"
"Well, when you put it that way it sounds stupid, but-"
"No, no 'buts', missy," Will said, waggon his finger at her. "It is just plain stupid. Did you actually hurt each other or were you too busy being idiots?"
"In fairness I really struggle with keeping up to other peoples' standards, alright?! And it did hurt that nothing I did ever seemed to be enough to make him like me!"
"With the way he was talking about you, he definitely likes you. And thinks you're good enough. You have nothing to worry about there, that's for sure." Y/n flushed at Will's words, thinking back to what she'd overheard Anthony say in this same room the day before.
"So explain to me your feelings on this? Because I feel like you went through every emotion known to man just now."
"I initially thought you two were great together because you're a lot more confident in yourself when he's around, then you told me you weren't together and I was incredibly confused, then you told me that you hated each other and I was even more confused, then you told me that you are actually together now and I was happy, and then you told me that he was horrible to you and I wanted to beat him up, and then you told me that you stepped on his shoes and that's why you hate each other and I was confused again. Make sense?"
"Just about. It wasn't just me stepping on his shoes that-"
"Nope!" Will turned his head away, lifting his hand out in front of him to stop her. "I don't want to hear anymore of this silliness, thank you very much!"
"But it-"
"Nope!" Will pushed forward, grabbing the pillow that he had earlier thrown back to Y/n and whacked her around the head with it. "Nope, nope, nope!" Each 'nope' was punctuated with another hit, and Y/n barely had time to pick up the other pillow and fight back before he was swinging again.
~~~
"Hey," Y/n whispered to Anthony as she came over. He had been sat in the loveseat again (he was almost completely certain that Y/n's family were leaving it specifically for the two of them to use, since her five siblings were squished up on one of the sofas most of the time), and he put down his mug of tea to help her sit comfortably.
"Hi," he whispered back, immediately wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her back to curl into him. She brought her legs up to hook over his and was turned sideways in the seat, her head nestling into his shoulder. He picked up his tea again and was about to take a sip when Will burst into the living room, board game in hand and a slightly crazed look in his eyes.
"We're playing Yahtzee! Everybody take a sheet, you don't have a choice in this!"
"Is this the one you're terrible at?" Anthony asked, speaking quietly into Y/n's ear, and he chuckled when she slapped his arm.
"You can't be terrible at Yahtzee, Anthony, it's a fucking dice game. It's based on luck, idiot."
"Oh, right, silly me. I meant charades. That one you are truly awful at."
"Just because you get really into it and put on ridiculously large hats doesn't mean I'm awful at it," she responded indignantly. "Also, by the way, the use of props is against the rules of charades, so technically you've lost every single one you've done."
"I have not!" he jokingly started, putting on an accent and pretending to be mad. "I am the best at charades! How dare you accuse me of- mmph!" Y/n shut him up by pressing a kiss to his lips, and while he sat there for a moment with his eyes wide open and his posture incredibly tense, he quickly relaxed into it. He still wasn't used to kissing her, and he didn't think that he ever would be, and when she pulled away a few seconds later he was left to chase after her mouth while she giggled.
"Sure, whatever makes you happy, Ant." That was another thing he'd never get used to. The way she said his name. He didn't think he'd heard anything sweeter, and then she was laughing at something one of her family members had said and he realised that he would spend his whole life documenting which of all the things she did was the most heavenly.
"You're what makes me happy, darling," he mumbled, not expecting her to hear. She looked round at him, surprise on her face. He thought she might say something nice in response, but instead when she opened her mouth something else came out.
"You are so cheesy, Anthony Lockwood."
"I'm just getting started, darling. Like you said, I have a lot of grovelling to do. I hope you're ready for how cheesy I can be." Y/n wrinkled her nose in disgust, but the wide grin on her face gave her away.
"That sounded weird," she said, and he leaned forward to press a gentle kiss to her nose. He shrugged in response.
"You're just going to have to get used to it, I'm afraid."
"Good. Hopefully you'll finish all the grovelling needed by the time you're about thirty, then."
"I'm grovelling every second of every day if it means I get to keep you near me, darling," he replied, and he revelled in the flush that crept up her neck. He accepted his score sheet from Will (who was getting very serious about the game, making sure that nobody would be cheating by using loaded dice), and took a sip of tea.
Then he nearly spat it out when he fully registered what Y/n had said.
"Thirty?!"
part 8
Tag list (once more hoping that this is everyone): @ahead-fullofdreams, @aislinrayne, @anathemaloren, @anthgoldenhrry, @augustisintheair, @avdiobliss, @aysha4life, @bobbys-not-that-small, @briar-rose23, @curseofhecate, @dangelnleif, @edible-rat-vomit, @el-de-phi, @ell0ra-br3kk3r, @ettadear, @fearlessmoony, @fudosl, @idkbubs, @imaginebeingmentallystable, @informedimagining, @karensirkobabes, @lady-ashfade, @light-23, @locklyebrainrot, @locklyle1kanij, @locknco, @magicandrosewaters, @mentallyillsodapop, @mischivana, @mitskiswift99, @mrsklockwood, @mrsyixingunicorn10, @newbooksmell777, @no-morning-glories, @novelizt, @phlooper, @ran23sblog, @reggiepeterss, @simrah1012, @somethingrandomwatzit, @star-of-velaris, @superpositvecloudshipper, @t2sh0, @taygrls, @tournesol77, @whistle1whistle, @whenselenefallsinlove, @wordsarelife, @y0urm0m12
let me know if you want to be added to/removed from the tag list! <3
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RECKLESS | lee heeseung
now playing âŸââșâđ§â©Â°ïœĄ reckless by madison beer
"how could you be, so reckless with my heart?"
âș âË genre: idol!hee x nonidol/university student!femreader, pure angst sorry lol, established relationship
âș âË warnings: cursing, lowercase intended, barely proofread, mention of i-land LOL, lots of dialouge and idk if thats even a warning but had to put it out there, use of nicknames like babe/baby, infidelity
âș âË word count: ~1k
âș âË message from nic: wanted to put smth out while working on my jay fic!! got inspired by this show i was watching called "the game" (dont watch it its like highkey misogynistic and a bit racist and just overall so bad đ) i wanted to rewatch it bc i used to watch it as a kid and now i realize how bad it was skdkd. but basically the bf is a pro football player while the gf is in med school and a certain plotline in the show inspired this đ also this is my first writing piece so pls be nice and feedback is appreciated!
heeseung slowly opened the front door to the apartment you and him shared, trying to be as quiet as possible since you were most likely sleeping. once he made it in he tip toe'd his way to your guys' bedroom. "did you have fun tonight hee?" you asked, while sitting on the couch with nothing but the lamp on. heeseung jumps, "holy shit you scared me! baby what are you doing up? come on let's get you to bed."
he walks over and tries to give you a kiss. you turned your head down only allowing him to press it to your forehead. you were pissed. actually, you were beyond that. words could not describe what you were even feeling at the moment.
you get up from the couch and stand before him, "you didn't answer my question. did you have fun tonight hee?" heeseung is perplexed by your tone. you sounded... hurt? angry? annoyed? all of the above? he tried to proceed with caution, racking his brain of all the possibilities of why you could be acting like this.
"uh... yeah babe, i had a lot of fun tonight. sorry i stayed out so late by the way. you really didn't have to wait up for me, you're probably tired." he was hopeful this was the right answer. it's gotta be, right? all you could do was stifle a cold laugh.
why the hell were you laughing? what was so funny? heeseung can feel his heartbeat in his ears and his skin was turning hot. you had never once acted this way in all of the years you guys had been together. it may not seem like a big deal to others, but you had always been so caring and sweet towards him.
even when you guys were arguing, your soft voice never changed. this was new. this was scary. you had a smile that didn't quite reach your eyes now and it seemed like you were staring into his soul.
"yeah heeseung. it's 2 am," you say sounding almost condescending, "but no i'm not mad that you stayed out so late. i mean i WAS, but after someone sent me a little something i realized there are worse things to be mad about." suddenly your phone is shoved into heeseung's hands. his jaw dropped. no. there's no way.
"who sent you this?! wait no it doesn't matter baby you can't believe this can you?" he reaches out for you but you pull away and start walking towards the front door to gather your jacket and bag, "so you're not even going to try to deny it? huh. i guess my friends were right." it makes him sick how you seem so calm on the outside, your words and actions treating this like one big joke while he's freaking out. he'd rather you be a crying, screaming mess than whatever behavior you're exhibiting at the moment.
you turn back around to him, "you think i donât know who youâre giggling with on the phone while iâm sitting in the room studying for hours? that iâm stupid enough to believe that youâre not making out with her in that video? that iâm blind enough to not see the heart eyes you two make at each other while in the same room?â your words drip with venom and they shoot heeseung straight in the heart.
he feels like the room is spinning and he wants to faint. he wants to go up to you and hold you and tell you that she doesnât matter, that youâre the only important thing in his life. but thatâs not what happens. heeseung is too wrapped up in the moment to admit his wrongs.
frankly, heâs disgusted with himself and at a loss for words right now. he wants to convince not only you but more importantly to himself that he didnât do anything wrong. and so he does. what comes out of his mouth next are words heâd soon regret. âWHAT DID YOU WANT ME TO DO YN?! iâve been so lonely lately because youâre so wrapped up in school and sheâs THERE FOR ME. sheâs been there when you werenât. i wouldnât have made out with her if YOU were at the afterparty with ME like i asked you to! we won four fucking awards tonight and i just wanted my girlfriend there to celebrate with me.â
and just like that, you snap. the jacket and bag in your hands are now thrown to the ground and heeseung flinches. âYOU ARE SO FUCKING UNBELIEVABLE! do you hear the words that are coming out of your mouth right now?! i told you i have an exam tomorrow there was no way i was going to that damn party.â
tears are blurring your vision and your breath is becoming uneven. you donât even recognize the man standing in front of you. âi have a life too heeseung. while youâre out chasing your dreams so am i. do you even acknowledge the sacrifices i have made for you over the past five years? tell me, was she there for you when you first became a trainee? was she crying for you every fucking episode of i-land? was she there every step of the way supporting your career?!"
heeseung doesnât speak. he doesnât move an inch yet his brain is moving a million miles per minute. he knows youâre right. he knows that you decline going out with your friends so you can wait for him to come home from practice. that your life only revolves around school and him. and heâs so eternally grateful for you. his heart yearns to express all the love he has for you and that he fucked up so badly. he just wants to fast forward to the part where you guys work through it and everything is okay again.
but that time is never going to come because you walk up to him with a heavy heart, placing the promise ring he gave you all those years ago in his hands.
he stares at the pretty diamond that shines in the moonlight, the only thing illuminating the darkness thatâs consumed the space you both once filled with love. âi hope she was worth it,â you say as you open the door and walk out into the cold night. leaving heeseung and all of the memories of your relationship behind.
© fakeuwus 2023 do not repost, translate, or plagiarize
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