Possible Trigger Warning?
You know that feeling you get when you’re in a lake or at a beach and you’re swimming in the ocean and you feel something brush by your leg?
Well, there’s that, and then there’s the soul-sucking nightmare of despair that latches onto you and tries to suck your life’s juices out of you. You feel like a rotting corpse that some wild creature preyed upon and left to dry to a husk in the desert and bugs and snakes crawl into your mouth and eyes and ears and take away your last bit of sanity and the last two brain cells you had…
It digs in deep with those suture-y wet tentacles with the fine hairy spines and doesn’t let go. You hear sucking and slopping sounds. It sounds hollow and wet. It’s a creature that creeps down from the ceiling onto your head, but you think it’s just a cobweb or something and try to brush it away. And then you suddenly start to go numb.
And if you weren’t dead enough it wraps it’s tail around your neck like a whip and slowly tightens around your throat until it breaks through your skin and then through your muscles and tendons and straight through your larynx and trachea until it wraps around your spine. And then it sucks out the marrow and the spinal fluid and you become limp and sag down like a soaked blanket and this creature clings to the ceiling so you just dangle and the last thing you see are your toes just brushing the floor…
Yeah, that’s basically how I’ve been feeling lately.
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I like my juice like I like my men.
Nutritious, delicious, and a trained exorcist
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Rafe: I'm gonna take what's mine, RIGHTFULLY mine!
Me:
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So it occurs to me that I posted most of their lore on my OC blog (though a few posts on here have the story info) and honestly I think it's very important to note that the entire reason a guy from Florida is recruited to help defeat the demon lord isn't him as the hero. His younger brother (by about ten years younger) is the Chosen Hero and... not very good at it. So the goddess (Solei) who had selected the hero has to begrudgingly go back to earth and convince his older brother to help save her world.
(Also Reynold admits to Solei that "Sascha could never be a bad influence. He's the best impulse control I've ever had" and she really doesn't like to hear it. That's terrifying.)
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so yes, orv did permanently and fundamentally shift my personal perspective of the world, specifically my role in it as a storyteller and an observer and a friend and a mentor and a child and an adult and a victim and someone in power and and and. it also made me feel the broadest spectrum of human emotion. I could probably spend years thinking about it and never fully understand everything it made me feel and all the personal and philosophical thoughts it made me think.
unfortunately if I think about it too hard for too long I find myself teetering on the cliff’s edge of a depressive episode and have to shut my media-analysis brain down so I don’t fall back into that particular black hole. after I finished it my brain fully shut down and did not come fully back online for 3-4 months I shit you not I finished it in October of last year and my emotional state has only just recovered.
it was one of the most devastating endings to a book I’ve ever read. It was perfect and beautiful. It was whatever the opposite of catharsis is. I’ve never been more filled with hope and awe. I’ve never been so desperately sad and hopeless. no I am not able to comprehend how that works either. see what I said above re: the cliff’s edge.
see the thing is it would have been FINE if shing-song had fucking WARNED ME that they were gonna make me FEEL EVERYTHING EVER about the human experience from EVERY ANGLE and then RIP OFF A SHEET AND REVEAL THAT THE STORY WAS A FUCKING MIRROR THIS WHOLE TIME. AND PROCEEDED TO BEAM ALL MY ATTENTION AND LOVE AND EMOTION I POURED INTO THIS STORY OVER A PERIOD OF LITERAL WEEKS OF SUSTAINED FOCUS STRAIGHT BACK AT ME IN THE SPAN OF 0.2 SECONDS LIKE A FUCKING ARCHIMEDES LASER.
ahem. anyways. that would be the uh. cliff’s edge. we will be walking away from it now.
anyway it’s the book with the two trench coat Korean dudes who beat Inventers-Of-Yaoi Spirk in the Yaoi Tournament Bracket it has badass ladies AND cringefail ones AND transgender allegories AND giant monsters and gods and demons and kids and magic and space and dimensions and time shenanigans it’s fucking insane and incredible and if you’re the kinda person who exists on fandom tumblr in the year of our lord 2024 this book is meant to come for you specifically and you will thank it afterwards go ye forth
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Azathoth smoll animation + my very first try in making sounds
text inside: mrlmrlmrl
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[The constellation 'Demon-like Judge of Fire' is looking down at you.]
After a moment, I heard the message I had been waiting for.
[All constellations of the absolute good system are in favour of Judgment Time.]
Finally, a bloody aura rose from Jung Heewon's body. "…Shit, I really hate the name of this skill.”
So it turns out I have a Type™, and that type is badass ladies with swords and flame motifs who are the physical embodiment of justice
[ID: A digital piece of fanart depicting the character Jung Heewon from the Korean webnovel Omniscient Reader by Sing-Shong. She is depicted from the waist up, surrounded by red flames and emitting a glowing red aura as she holds aloft a sword of fire, ready to swing. Dressed in a black waistcoat, a red tie, and a white dress shirt with rolled sleeves, she smiles bitterly as she stares at the viewer with fiery red eyes, a single tear tracing its way down her left cheek. Above her is the glowing golden-red outline of the archangel Uriel, set against a dark navy sky. Distraught, she digs the heels of her palms against her eyes as her fingers twist in her hair and tears drip from her chin. /end ID]
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